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plasticfangtastic · 10 months

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American Royalty. Epilogue.

A Homelander x F! Reader/Dadlander fic

A/N: Here's the epilogue hope y'all enjoy this last entry, it meant a lot to write this I just can't get enough of Dadlander fics, I hope S4 inspires me to write more dadlander fics or fics were I can put reader-chan or OCs as his spouse-- will post part 2 of the masterlist and update my pin post soon.

Epilogue

American Royalty

Homelander hurried downstairs, fighting with his tie as he rushed to the breakfast table, throwing the red string by the foot of the stairs in frustration, just stopping shyly by a mirror to make sure his hair was nicely combed, his phone buzzing in his back pocket– probably another missed call from an executive or Ashley about the upcoming shareholders meeting.

Forks and plates clink downstairs, as he makes his way past the kitchen where one of the maids is cleaning dirty pans, spotting the back of your head as you serve Ryan some juice.

“Good morning, uncle.” Said Elmo sitting on Homelander’s spot.

“Hello kid that doesn’t live here but still eats for free!”

“Father!”

“Good Morning, princess.”

He was quick to wrap his arm on your waist and kiss your temple, pulling a chair as he smoothly disarms himself from you.

He stares at Elmo who at the tender age of 15 is the same height as Homelander, he’s a muscular teen, a perfect 80’s movie jock even wearing a varsity jacket, his superhero suit a perfect match to Helena’s.

Her jacket hanging on her chair and massively oversized, a puffy bomber jacket only achieving to dwarf her small frame– it’s a strong red, and the inside liner it's made out of Homelander’s own cape, her suit tight on her with a red X framing her chest something that had now began to bother her father, her shortie gloves laid next to her coffee, Elmo's was black with a white X on his chest.

Helena and Elmo were an odd match but that was part of the duet's charm, with her stuck at 1.55 cm in height while he was already 1.85 cm and growing, she was skinny and her hair slightly longer just past her shoulders, her bangs still blocking her eyes.

But as she lifted her face away from her tablet, he was welcomed by a beautiful young girl, Helena had everything that made you beautiful, like a majestic peony– she had blossomed to perfection, so pretty he would rub it in people’s faces about just how pretty his daughter was, even the dark circles under her eyes added character to her features.

Elmo was a handsome boy and a concern, even if your daughter insisted she had no interest in the tall muscular teen, Homelander had begun to remind himself every so often that he couldn’t harm the child, he couldn’t scare him to keep him in line, for fear that Helena would lash back at him if he touched her best friend.

“No tie?”

“Don’t start princess, now eat something, we got an incredibly long day ahead lots of last minutes meetings–

“It's breakfast!” You interrupted taking a seat by his side– no work talk until you get to the office!”

He took a sip of his milk, turning to Ryan who was in an unspoken competition with Elmo about who could eat the most waffles– Ryan had grown to a handsome young man, a light stubble on his cheeks as he tried to look more mature, his hair messy, still in his pajamas which made Homelander’s eyebrow raise... somehow in this state it reminded him of Butcher specially with the growing beard.

“Excited about today?”

“A bit nervous” He chewed quickly, covering his mouth to speak– but am certain I won’t make a fool of myself in the interview”

“You will not fail the university admission interview. Godolkin would be suicidal to reject the son of Vought CMO and the brother of the Senior Vice president of research and development.” He smiles– Besides I basically pa–

“Maybe he wants to feel as if he got into Godolkin on his own!” You interjected– Ryan has been a tremendous hero, saved dozens of people and has done everything to stand on his own. You’ll do great Ryan. I’ll be there for you and so will Genevieve.”

You look to your side, her face covered in maple syrup.

She looked up, her long white hair it’s all puffy and a tad frizzy, short bangs on her forehead pushed back and her thick glasses sliding down as she tries wiping the sticky syrup off her lips, you check that her beige dress isn’t dirty.

“You’re going to take care of your big brother today aren’t you, my dove.” John said with his sweetest voice– gotta help him out when daddy is not around.”

He took a long sip of his milk, he looked past you just to get a good glimpse of his small daughter.

Genevieve had unsurprisingly been born just as different as she was extraordinary, her condition had been a source of concern at first– her vision quite poor, her skin sensitive to the sun and her eyes hurt under any harsh light but the V in her system had kept those ailments in check even if she was quick to sunburn it would heal within a day.

It had worried you as she stopped being baby, as she began to waddle towards her father that somehow Joh would cease to see his precious daughter and instead some sort genetic disappointment.

But John had adored her, every milestone was met with adulation and praise, everything he had missed with the other two he was experiencing them with Genevieve, both glued to the other’s hip, she was more than a clingy child, she refused to leave his side as a baby and a toddler-- at times she would even cried harder when hungry because she had to part her father’s side in order to feed, angry that it was you who was responsible for that… eventually you both learned it was easy to get her to latch if he was also feeding with her (for Homelander insisted on breastfeeding and no bottle) you could accuse him of being improper if he wasn’t cooing and falling asleep with your nipple in his mouth, his eyes fully glazed and his mind somewhere else, it made for an odd sight but you both didn't want broken eardrums plus it was somewhat soothing.

You jokingly teased to get him a bra with a baby bottle just to make it easier for her– as her cries every once in a while would break the glassware, he briefly considered before thinking it was too much… despite that, her clinginess brought him no grief, those 7 months he stayed home had brought a side of him you’ve never imagine he possessed, he was sweet and gentle, extremely attentive with her… the guilt on his face whenever he did something with Genevieve that he hadn’t done with Ryan and Helena would wear him down– forcing himself to part from the baby to spend time with them as much as he could, your kids went to faraway places, overseas lunches, art galleries anything they wanted just to make sure he wasn’t neglectful… only to get home and immediately remove his little dove from your arms and place her on his chest, sniffing on her hair as if he was doing lines.

By the time you both went back to work she would only really spend time in Vought’s daycare when Ashley, Ashley’s at the time fiancee or Helena’s PA weren’t available for when he wasn’t able to have her on her arms, eventually nobody minded that he had a baby in his arms, she attended meetings that Helena had no interest in and even those she did alongside her big sister, much to your daughter’s annoyance.

Everything Genevieve did made him fluster and blush, his cheeks and eyes hurting from how much smiling he did, when her first word were ‘dada’ he was born anew, you remember that afternoon as you tried to clean her diaper while he pester you to do it correctly while unable to do it himself– he hadn’t left her alone for the rest of the week just wanting to get to speak more and more, he was heartbroken when he missed her first step but got it recorded from Ryan.

She loved the new cat he’d bought for Helena for her birthday and for a while the two had a one-sided feud for his daughters affections, even more so for his little dove love who seemed utterly fascinated by the hairless goblin.

With every year his children spend with him– he grew softer and domestic, something you’ve never anticipated.

And a part of you grew more wicked as you were too happy that Ryan began to call you mom, you weren’t ‘Miss anything’ or Y/N anymore, once you found yourself cuddling him and running down the streets to not miss his school events, or staying till late to help him with a science project you were more than enthused when you realized you had become a normal family, he was your boy too.

You had grown to like this life just as much as he did.

The day he hung the cape he hurt as much as you thought he would.

Homelander had died but he did not.

He bore his scars both as a reminder of that final battle with William Butcher… a painful victory, but of proof that he had survived to see his children grow.

His face had been scarred– starting from his forehead, crossing his lips and chin to make it down to his neck.

The destruction of his face had broken him but as he saw that none of his children cared for his injury, only that he was alive and Genevieve would never knew anything else, it made it not just bearable but okay. It had been a hard road, a messy road but here he was still working at Vought, still running things and frightening every soul both above and below his station, finding his talents in Hero management taking Stillwell’s former position soon after then heading the marketing department as of two years ago.

You on the other hand had become co-owner of Lucci, after a second restaurant was opened– a more contemporary casual italian joint still serving award winning pizza but now more contemporary italian fair, part of the success had been the quality and ambiance but being Homelander’s wife did brought a fair amount of foot traffic to your restaurants– it was far from what you’ve hoped to achieve but you had a business, away from Vought’s Tower after that little accident that cost Homelander his face nearly destroyed the company.

But like the flu, it came back the next season just the same.

“So ‘The Watch’ got the green light for being debuted at the shareholder’s meeting, the rest of the team arrived last night after that fuck up with United… and we have hours of photoshoots today” Elmo said as he read his father’s message.

Even with the events that took Homelander’s cape it did not kill his worth to the company, his children now carried the burden to live up to the legacy, which meant continuing with the superhero business.

Nigel had become your daughter’s manager and with Homelander as the one running the department it was a guarantee success, Helena had cared very little about the job, only doing the tag-team work to make you and Homelander happy, to her it was only worth it as just another way to keep her foot in as many aspects of her company as she could juggle.

Tragically she had to work as a Supe and you could tell how much she hated it by the grimace she was trying to hide.

“I just said no work… that includes you Elmo.”

“Sorry Ms. Gillman but Dad won’t stop messaging me.”

Homelander looked at his phone staring at a pic of the final line-up after they arrived to the airport, proud of his selection, he had vetted them, tested them and had been working closely with all of them for their debuts… perhaps Helena’s intellect was partially inherited.

“Is okay honey… is a stressful week… 'The Watch' is a 15 year long project… The industry has had a rough couple of years but test audiences and online response has been overwhelmingly positive, so Vought is very nervous about this launch… and we know Nigel and Sven are mostly nervous about Phantasma.”

“I’m not going to fuck it up, I just don’t want to do this nonesense. I'm busy.”

“The suit gets your funding. V30 might’ve been a success but the rest of your research is dependent on your public image.”

Helena grumbled not wanting to air out dirty iodine stained laundry, she looked down to see the family cat pawing at her leg asking for bacon which she happily obliged.

You settled in the entrance, trying to apply sunscreen to Genevieve as she seemed bothered by this new brand’s smell.

“It's not that bad, my dove.” Homelander came in holding two ties in his hand but no Helena, Elmo behind him looking stressed out– you have to bear it. It's good for you”

“It's yucky!”

“Daddy and mom just want you to be safe out there in the sun… I’ll go buy you a nicer one later, I promise.” He was considering firing the maid who purchased the wrong sunscreen in the first place but he would run it by you later– but first you need to go and take care of your big brother… think of this as your own suit.” He said with a smile.

“Is not a suit! Is cream!”

Her voice was airy, he handed you the ties and took the bottle of your hands instead, kneeling to press a fresh dot on her chin, she pouted but let it happen.

As he got up you wrapped a light blue string on his neck, tying it with more ease than he could ever muster, while Genevieve skipped towards the entrance to find her brother.

“I thought we’d skip the rebellious years with her.”

“What, you think Helena is out of hers?” you lightly chuckle– Ryan wasn’t too bad tho.”

“Ryan was delightful… Helena… thank god she’s Elmo’s problem most of the time.” he said while shaking his head.

“I’m not dating Elmo!” Helena came down with a large messenger bag under her arm and her tablet in the other– even if they love us online.”

“Your dad didn’t mean it like that… more like am your babysitter”

“Say that again and I’ll break your jaw.” she said sharply.

“Always so feisty… I feel bad for your teammates.” You say as your daughter grumbles.

They headed outside bickering about the usual things.

“You look handsome.” Your hands flatten his lapels, getting a feel of his suit– I’ll take Ryan and Genevieve out for lunch so make sure you and Helena eat, don't make me call Elmo.”

“If you ignore these” he pointed at his scars and the slight drop on his left eye– "I tell you at this rate we might have to adopt this kid.”

Admittedly you two had given him his own guest bedroom, and his parents just took you as their designated babysitter as they work and traveled for work tirelessly, but when the superhero business took place it was them who handle it, as you stayed home with the other two kids… regardless in his own way Homelander was fond of the kid who also ate him out of house and home.

“I think you look handsome with the scars…” You whispered.

Your arms wrapped themselves on his shoulders, he grinned sliding his hands into your hips and into your ass, giving you a playful squeeze.

“As I always say… it makes you look distinguished… is sexy.” he smiled for the breathy voice turned him on.

“I think the older I get the worse they get…”

“Oh John… the gray hairs and the scar just makes me wanna fuck you in the coat’s closet before you head for work.” you whispered with a moan.

You kissed him, the peck turned passionate, he lifted you just enough to make a passing maid fluster, your hands trying to control themselves to not mess up his hair, you squeezed at his neck and shoulders as his tongue explored yours.

“There’s children here!”

Ryan covered his eyes, trying to rush past you two as he mimed some gagging, rushing to his bedroom to pick up a forgotten item before returning back down with a gust of wind.

“After you drop the kids… swing by the office” He leaned into your ear, his hand still in your ass– please. babe”

“Those fingers better be warm for me.”

He purred into your lips, hesitant to stop kissing you but as he heard your daughter shout about being late, he reluctantly freed you, as the maid handed you your coat.

As you followed, a small group had already formed on the street catching selfies with Elmo, Helena hid her face behind her gas mask wishing she could flip her finger to the annoying crowd as she entered the car after forcing herself to pose for some photos– Homelander waved you goodbye after kissing Genevieve.

Ryan and Genevieve are already in the car by the time the crowd disperses and Homelander’s car departs.

“What?” Ryan still looked grossed out, his ears already picked up on what his parents had discussed– hey somebody is gonna have to kept your dad in a good mood when he finds out you’re applying for the Performing Arts program”

“I shouldn’t have to lie to him about not wanting to be a superhero.”

“Being a superhero is what will get your foot in Hollywood. The indie scene can be kind to you but if you want to be the next ‘Guillermo Del Toro’ or Miyasaki– you need to keep that suit to impress future investors, producers and studios.”

“So the same thing he says to Helena… he’s going to kill me.” He mumbles.

“Just dedicate your first Palme D’Or to your father… he’s gonna kill you over making animated movies instead of ‘real’ films more likely.”

He scoffed.

“Daddy don’t get angries!.” Genevieve took a juice box out of her backpack, struggling with her little chubby fingers to remove the plastic off the straw– you guys are meanies!”

“Oh Genevieve… you’re right… Daddy is a saint” You help her out, too young to catch the sarcasm– just let me handle your father.”

You leaned towards him, placing your hand on his lightly stubbled face after handing your daughter her juice, looking at him with adoring eyes, he was your sweet boy you could almost see a younger Homelander in him… no… a young John.

“Your father will be mad for a minute but the moment he sees a whole theater room fawning after your work… when he sees you happy beaming with pride… he’ll be crying while starting a round of applause if anything he’ll be so cringy… Leave it to me… besides you’re not staying in Godolkin anyhoo.”

“NYU in two years…” He leaned into your hand– He did… made a big deal when I qualified for South by Southwest… and… he did got pretty upset about not qualifying for that other one…”

“He was looking forward to booking those flights to England” You smiled softly– let him throw his tantrum, my sweet boy. I’ll be right there if you need me, Ryan.”

“Thanks mom.”

Homelander stood beside Nigel and Ashley as the photoshoot took place, a couple heads from marketing and media relations hovered around, the director of photography assistant drone on about the shoot but Homelander paid her very attention, his sight on the computer screen analyzing the images, ensuring his daughter got the best angles, he made his way to interrupt the photographer as he picked “bad” shots, the man was used to helicopter parents trying to do his job in his behalf but superhero suit or not… nobody fail to recognize Homelander, so he listened.

“Her chin looks fat.” He mutters, the man swallows and just nods moving towards his assistant to take his camera once more, Helena scoffs ready for another round of torture– she better look perfect in these concept photos.”

The man nods rapidly.

“Show your powers a bit, princess.” He says towards her– "whose idea was to do a photoshoot in civilian clothes…?”

Homelander turned to Nigel.

“Makes them seem fresh. If they look stylish and beautiful in and out of the suit. People will eat it up… it would be easier if we could recreate what made ‘The Seven’ succeed, and other teams that try to be of that caliber but this isn’t meant to appeal to only the American market, so this works… heroes these days have to be approachable not godly figures …trying to set up a global network of superheroes alongside juiced-up V30 soldiers has been tricky.” Said Ashley-- so we gotta play perfectly."

He rolled his eyes, fidgeting with his phone, getting a glimpse at the other supes waiting for the turn or getting their make-up retouched.

“I feel like we should’ve been doing this 30 years ago to have some older supes in the different territories but this mentorship program was a genius move, Homelander, sir.” Ashley spoke proudly– but the girls are the best representatives of Vought and their countries.”

“Just shipping our recyclable waste overseas.” He chuckles in a creepy manner as his sight focuses on the other heroes– "I almost feel bad for Roman Candle, having to be stuck with Deep in Greece.”

“She has a good sense of humor about it” Ashley smiles at her direction– hopefully he stays there.”

The team was a pretty visually pleasant group, Phantasma and Poltergeist as reps of the American division, Roman Candle– a pyrokinetic Supe representing Southern Europe, the tomboy of the team, her playful pixie cut messy around her golden lyra band, her face covered in freckles, her suit a toga with a chainmail dress beneath, and armor gauntlets and boots, then there was Hex Trap– a powerful illusionist falling into her trap meant having a schizophrenia speedrun representing Northern Africa, her suit was rather casual, a victorian long sleeve blouse, leather shorts, fishnets, black combat boots, and gothic accessories, Hex was a statuest teenager, her hair long and braided and very much french-raised but they had another candidate for western Europe so Homelander handed her Norththen Africa; next to Elmo was La Tunda– a shapeshifter who could turn herself into a frightening beast, she was body positive but not offensive according to Homelander’s team, she was well liked in her country had she not been strong he wouldn’t have given her the opportunity, he had supervise her re-debut makeover– her outfit quite small and her middrift was a bit exposed but it was cheaper in the long run for her to destroy less material, and finally to her left about to have her donut re-fried was the team’s visual– Joro-Spider a successful model, a dancer, social media influencer, a real idol and the representative of East Asia, her long black hair gave her an elegant look and her black, yellow and red suit her half hoodie and sneakers gave her a cool modern look, she was the 2nd most popular after Elmo leaving Helena 3rd in her own team, it aggrevated Homelander but she was a big draw for audiences.

Homelander didn’t hesitate to laser that half-eaten donut making the girl squeal as she dropped the evaporating pastry.

“That’s your third.” She hides her face knowing not to piss him off– go wash your face.”

She runs trying not to cry.

“Ashley… why is Joro’s hair fucking neon-yellow?” He noticed the tips she was hiding in her hood– why was I not notified!?” He screamed.

“She showed up this morning like that!! We already talked to her parents but her fans” she nearly dropped her phone trying to unlock it to show him the hair reveal post, his ire calmed down at the sight of 200K and counting likes– it's a hit.”

“Tell her to come by my office after we are done here.”

Neither Ashley nor Nigel argued with him.

Late afternoon came and all he had left to deal with was the remnants of Helena’s tantrum, each photoshoot had driven her mad, and now she had locked herself in a closet, chunks of her hair trailing her path into the closet.

“Helena I can break this door, or Elmo can faze into that closet and get you out… but I don’t want to do any of that… I want you to come out. I’m not angry.”

He could see her cowering beneath some coats, he had displaced the crowd leaving them alone in the dressing room, he dropped to the ground resting by the door.

“Sorry… I didn’t mean to stress you out… I know between the shareholder meeting, your research and your hero duties you have enough on your plate… but this is a big thing for the both of us… for me… it would be easier if you could just be Dr. Gillman.”

“Can I?” Her voice was a squeak.

“Not yet… not until you take over Vought… after that you can be just my perfect and sweet daughter.”

The door opened slightly, she crawled towards her dad, letting herself be cradled in his arms, sniffling loudly, her once long hair had been cut short, barely passing the lengths of her chin, it was a choppy mess even more so than before, he rested his chin on her head as he wrapped her tight.

“‘The Watch’ means a lot to me… after Butcher did this to me… after his hooligans almost took down Vought… I thought it was over but with you… with you by my side we have worked so hard to rebuild this empire… I’ve worked so freaking hard to get my crown back just for you… just so I have something to give you… I know it's killing you, but this is the only way to bring together our fractured kingdom… for you to lead this new generation of Supes to greatness. We’re American royalty, Helena… it does not come easy to have so many burdens.”

Helena clung to his suit, trying to not pout any further, trying to stop herself from crying.

“The world needs us… it needs your brilliant mind to guide it… in 10 years I don’t doubt you’ll be the head of Vought and no doubt the rest of the world’s superheroes would be under your loyal command… but we can’t get there if we don’t make sacrifices.” he kissed her head, burying his nose in her hair, as he coddled her– or you rather hand your crown to Elmo? Ryan?"

“No… You think the public will love me? I’m not you… am not pretty… I can’t actually fly… am not even that tall! And I suck with people!”

“You are the most beautiful girl in the whole world. When I was your age I was locked in a cage having to practice speaking to people via intercoms and phones… and now I give amazing speeches! Is a skill that you can learn, and flying is cool... is a great selling point but you’re strong and a genius.” He kissed her again, glad that she was still so little compared to him– You’re my daughter and your mother’s daughter… you can do it… for a little bit longer.”

“Maybe Genevieve will like being a hero… it’s hard.”

“It’d be nice if at least one of you does.” His smile is slightly forced but he can’t bring himself to be upset– just to make me happy.”

“She can fly already.” She sounded mad against his chest.

“My little dove lives up to her name… but we need to build a world for her… a world for us Supes and you’re the only one that can do that.”

“I just have to work for a little longer for mom’s and your future…” She lifted her head not trying to get out of her father’s embrace, he looked down at his hand pulling on her nose playfully– I won’t waste 10 years of hard work over some shitty photoshoot. Sorry.”

Butcher had nearly taken everything from her, she had to do everything to make sure Vought would remain, she had to protect her mother’s livelihood and her father’s too, so here she was consumed by anxiety, slashing the hair that’s been played, pulled and burnt, sprayed and washed all day– her nose burning from all the chemicals and oils.

“Let’s go back to the office… that’s enough for today… you got your daddy’s talents! There’s more than enough good shots already, shame that your teammates are so god awful at this… you did great… amazing…” he kissed her forehead gently pushing her away from him, as they struggled to stand up– my sweet girl… you will do amazing things as the head of “The Watch” Vought better watch out..”

“The world you mean.”

He looked at her hair, lifting a few choppy strands in-between his fingers, letting out a soft chuckle.

“I can make this work. Leave it to dad.” he winked.

“Thanks… dad.”

The two-day extravaganza was about to culminate, the fair and meetings had almost ended and the new international team’s first iteration had been a resounding success, Homelander had been approached by his team regarding representatives for India and a NATO backed hero for the eastern bloc, a couple names being thrown: a young man from Hungary and a young woman from Ukraine… he wanted to kept the female ratio high due to future sex-appeal and to foster audiences to view these heroines like daughters or nieces that they wanted to support and watch grow… and maybe with time also fuck– he turned to Also Ashley to politely reject all male prospectives for the time being.

He took a long sip of his ginger ale as Ashley and other execs discussed providing China with their own supe after tentatively selling some small quantities of V30 just to test the waters… he scoffed at the idea, almost colliding with Andrew their stupid CFO over it, it would be easier if he could just rip his jaw off instead of repeating himself, it was weird to be the sensible one on the table for once, leaving the room before he actually killed a man, his eyes constantly flaring as the discussion heated up.

You nudge at his shoulder, inside the basketball stadium that has been transformed to encapsulate the magnitude of Vought, there was the lounge… ‘The Seven Oasis’– the acquisition of the Brooklyn Nets and the Barclay Centre had been divisive but sports was always a good source of income– It was paying off to have your own facility especially after such aggressive expansions.

You both stared at the floor below where only 1 hour ago The Watch officially debuted, the electricity was still in the air as the girls were still on stage partaking in a Q&A, after a lengthy introductory documentary, showing their profiles and accolades.

He turned to see you in an elegant but simple cream coloured two piece suit, in your hand a glass of moscato.

“Ryan is a natural in front of the camera… remember when he was just a shy little thing?” You said resting your weight against him, he shifted lightly on his seat to make you more comfortable, as Ryan and some attractive woman hosted the panel presentation– The Patriot… he plays the role flawlessly, hard to believe it's Ryan under the mask.”

His brows lowered and his lower jaw pushed forward.

“You cannot keep giving me the silent treatment, it's been days.” You remark but he didn’t make a sound– can’t believe it took me 10 years of putting up with you for you to finally leave me alone… guess my back can finally rest.’

He put his ginger ale down, glad that the room was so private, away from the relentless onslaught of annoying execs, Joro was delighting the audiences showing her powers as she swung across the ceiling with increasingly more unpredictable and aggressive movements, it was quite the sight getting the crowd rowdy, he looked away to give you a murderous look.

“I swear we told you.”

“Don’t gaslight me. The one who does the gaslighting in this relationship it's me!” He remarked with a bark– you should’ve told me!”

“Well what’s done is done.” You tried to keep a confident look on your face– now what are you going to do about it?”

“What can I do? Make Ryan hate me!? Just gotta smile like a good boy and deal with it!”

“Exactly!”

“I love you too.” He said with heavy sarcasm, He looked back on the stage listening to Elmo discussing his exploits in Ontario, his goals for protecting the America’s and looking forward to heading down to Mexico– He will continue his Superhero duties! Let him try being fucking Scorcese all he wants but he’s not taking the suit off!”

He smashed his fist on the armrest, breaking it with ease, younger you would have jumped in fright but now it was but a lull, no palpable sense of danger in his actions, you took a short sip of your drink putting it down on the floor, your ears picking up on Elmo’s answering the never ending barrage of dating rumors, being a handsome boy surrounded by a bunch of cute girls certainly put him in a phenomenal position but he treated the answer with respect saying that these girls were like family to him.

Homelander eyes spark as the question became about Helena, he awaited the idiot’s response but Elmo was more than genuine when he spoke of her like her sister, the bastard did sleep in his house enough, he even ended his answer referring to Homelander as his uncle, looking into the booth with a wink– Helena was doing her best to stay still glad that her gasmask covered half her face and her bangs hid her eyes so nobidy saw her pissed off expression, the interviewer turned to Helena about the same question.

“Too busy.” Her tone was playful– maybe when am older and not helping take care of the country! Just not with this doofus!” She elbowed him playfully.

Ryan gave her an approving nod, definitely acting like the good older brother he was, as he reviewed the next question and quickly proceeded to ask the one after.

The audience seemed happy about that, Homelander relaxed turning back to you.

“You have my support there… The Patriot won’t fade away… our boy isn’t stupid, he knows being a super puts him in a better spot than others… but I better have your support for his dreams, in the same way I have supported this grand vision of yours… in the same way you and I have supported Helena.” You rested your chin on his elbow– remember when Helena graduated from MIT… how happy you were?”

He could still see his little 11 year old in her cap, a couple murmurs irritated him as they were incredulous to see a small child on stage, he had taken the job of her driver: flying her back and forth, he was happier when she went to Cornell just to make the trips shorter, her bubble was useful but you both were too worried about her going on her own meeting planes, birds and god knows what else.

He was one of those embarrassing parents that evening.

“Am not upset about him not pursuing Crime Fighting… am upset about being lied to… of course I’ll support him! What kind of dad would I be if I stayed mad about it!?”

“I’m glad you are still doing your best.” You stroke his chin letting him kiss your palm as he follows your tender gestures– Maybe we should start heading downstairs to meet the rest of the execs… heard from Ashley, Russia is throwing some big numbers.”

“Oh geez can’t wait for ‘The Cold War 2: Electric boogaloo edition’ these fucking idiots… Where’s Genevieve? She’s probably tired or high on sugar” he started getting up leaving his mess for somebody else to clean, offering you a hand to help stand up– you look great… that skirt makes your ass look amazing, hope the whole place knows just how good my wife’s ass is…” He gave your behind a light smack as you foolishly took the lead– better than wine.”

“She’s with Ashley’s wife, and thank you… you look cute in a turtleneck… maybe I get to see you out of it.”

As you left the suite, he stopped himself by the door looking into the crowd as ‘The Watch’ began to leave the stage.

“Was it worth it? Getting married and living with me and such.”

He could hear Helena's heartbeat finally calming down, Hearing Ryan speak kindly into her ear. You stared at him unsure as to what brought this on but whatever his ear was picking up might’ve stressed him out.

“I’m happy. I don’t recognize myself some mornings. But I didn’t think I was going to make it back then, always afraid CPS or Vought would take my kid away… wondering if I had a future to give her… then I realized I don’t want to recognize that old me…”

“Sometimes I miss that voice in my head but I don’t think I want him to come back… I like this… I like us… I like the Gillman’s… even the cat, that fat lazy naked cat.”

“You love that cat, you give him chamomile and oat baths so his skin stays healthy!” You laughed thinking of Homelander and that tiny goblin mewling as he stroked his paws with some soothing balm cream made for cats– I like this too… I like that we made it work.”

“And you… you like me? Like you liked me the first time?” you were a bit incredulous at hearing this 50 year old man sound like a teen for the moment, his hand heavy on the door but jittery– I like you… like you lots.”

You blushed, trying to calm down as he swayed lightly on his toes.

“Well you certainly don’t come home covered in blood and guts as often, like when we first met… Jesus you ruined so many nice tops because you were such a messy but sweet boy… shame… I wouldn’t mind getting rid of some shirts” you giggled, you were always a little messed up, you had to be to find him lovely in the first place– I like you… a lot… so…do… you wanna go out on a date with me then?”

You twirled with your hair, biting on your lip trying to be cheesy, here you were a teenage girl asking your crush on the school yard once again.

“Y-Y-Yes!” He swallowed, looking genuinely nervous– Should I get covered in blood for our date?”

“Maybe… altho maybe we should save that up for after Ryan moves to campus, Helena should be busy at work… and I get Ashley and her wife to babysit Genevieve… they want some more practice before the adoption finalizes…so promise?”

“Promise.”

His eyes glowed in a way no superpowered laser ever could imitate, he held your hand as he closed the door behind.

You both thinking about where to go for your next date.

“Maybe we could go furniture shopping and get a singular bed for our bedroom…” He said nervously.

“Maybe” You winked at him.

The end.

A/N: lowkey want to write a sequel to thsi fic but centering on Helena as she tries to be a hero one day so this its baity, also Helena is canonically a lesbian so she'll never be with Elmo as to how Homie will react well I always write him as canon Bi but he doesn't know she's gay yet so who knows.

Taglist: @demodemo909 @ghqst-fqce @immyowndefender @fromforeigntofamiliarity @thychuvaluswife

#homelander #personal #the boys #homelander x reader #homelander x you #homelander x y/n #my fic tag #dadlander #plz check my other works if you'll like my stuff #shoudl be posting all of this in ao3 during my work break my issue was that some of my earlier fics were writen straight into tumblr drafts #and copyign and pasting from tumblr its hellish on mobile as i dont own a computer

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gloombeauty · 2 years

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In defense of Evan Peters:

Here I am defending this poor man because he did his job as an actor.

You have Black Twitter and the victim's family going after Evan this week for winning a fucking Golden Globe. 🖕

To the victim's family: Evan Peters doesn't owe you shit. He didn't owe you a 12 minute speech while receiving his hard earned Golden Globe award. He doesn't owe you a penny of his paycheck. The fact that *some* of the victim's family are attacking Evan infuriates me. Calling Evan sick and demanding they get paid! Paid by who? Evan?! Are you fucking serious?

Family members continue repeating that they haven't received a penny from Ryan. Ryan contacted each member of the victim's families. None of them called him back. I'm sure none of them even sat down to watch the series. Why would they? Understandably. However, they would have seen the incredible love, respect and compassion each victim in the series recieved.

The loudest mouth of the victim's family is the mother of Tony Hughes. He was the sweet, kind, charming young man who was deaf. His mom called Evan sick and lambasted him for not mentioning the victims in his speech. She also wants her money.

I'm sorry your loved ones are dead.

I'm sorry they died in the hands of one of the most disgusting human beings.

I'm sorry they died in such a horrible way.

But Evan didn't kill your family members. He's just an actor doing his job. Fuck you for putting that guilt on him and demanding money.

I don't see any of the family members attacking Niecy Nash. Why is that? She's in the series too. I don't think I have to spell that one out.

The way Evan looked when he got up there to get his WELL DESERVED GOLDEN GLOBE AWARD. He looked embarrassed. He looked ashamed. He looked guilty. Ryan Murphy looked at Evan with love and pride. I think he knew what Evan felt. He was there to get his Caroll Burnett Lifetime Award but you can tell Ryan's eyes were on Evan. He was there standing by him. I can almost hear Ryan say "you deserve this award Evan. Ignore the noise".

Black Twitter and the families need to back off and leave this man alone. He doesn't owe you shit. He did his job. He got paid. He got awarded for his good job. Deal with it.

Go demand money from police in Milwaukee. They are the ones who stood by and ignored Glenda when she called them. She called and called warning them Jeffrey was hurting those men. The police ignored her.

The Milwaukee police let Jeffrey slide time and time again.

You want to call anyone sick, throw that label to the Milwaukee police. You can also demand all the money in the world from them.

I don't care if I offended anyone. 🖕

This is my blog. This is my opinion. Suck it. 🖕

Congratulations to Evan! You deserve this award and every award that goes your way. Keep your money in your pocket and ignore the bullshit noise.

#evan peters #ryan murphy #jeffrey dahmer

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koreofkore · 1 year

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Pilot episode | chapter 1

ᥲsᥱᥒᥲ іs іᥒ 𝖿᥆r ᥲ sᥙr⍴rіsᥱ ᥕһᥱᥒ ᥲ ᥴһіᥣძ kᥒ᥆ᥴks ᥆ᥒ һᥱr ძ᥆᥆r ᥴᥣᥲіmіᥒg 𝗍᥆ ᑲᥱ һᥱrs.

╬╬═════════════╬╬

Fairytale world

Prince Charming (Tony) rode on his horse along the stretch of the land towards a forest. In the forest, he meets seven dwarves gathered around a glass coffin. "You're to late." Wong says. He looks at Pepper in the coffin. Her skin pale and her chest unmoving. "No. No! Open it." He ordered. "I'm sorry, she's gone." Strange said mornfully. "At least let me say goodbye." Tony begged.

All seven men remove the glass top. Tony leans down and kisses her lips and a wave of magic pulses throughout the kingdom. No one notices except the birds that leave the branches they perched on. Pepper wakes up with a gasp. "You... You found me." She said breathlessly. "Did you ever doubt I would?" Tony asked her. "Truthfully, the glass coffin gave me pause." She joked.

"Well, you never have to worry. I will always find you." He assured. "Do you promise?" She asked. "I do." Tony says at their wedding. "And do you, Pepper Potts, promise to take this man to be your husband, and love him for all eternity?' The priest asked. " I do she says. " I now pronounce you husband and wife." The priest says. Everyone applauds and cheers. Pepper and Tony lean to kiss each other when the ballroom doors swing open by a magical force. "Sorry I'm late." The red head stated.

She goes to approach the newlyweds and the guards try to stop her. She flings them away with magic. "It's the Queen. Run!" Someone in the crowd yells. "She's not the queen anymore. She's nothing more than a evil witch." Pepper said grabbed her husbands sword pointing it at her.

"No, no, no. Don't stoop to her level. There's no need." He consoles. Tony takes his sword from her. "You're wasting your time. You've already lost. And I will not let you ruin this wedding." Tony said. "Oh, I haven't come here to ruin anything. On the contrary, dear, I've come to offer you a gift." Natasha smiles. "We want nothing from you." Pepper says in anger.

"But you shall have it! My gift to you is this happy, happy day. But tomorrow my real work begins. You've made your vows, now I make mine. Soon everything you love, everything all of you love, will be taken from you. Forever. And out of your suffering, will rise my victory. I shall destroy your happiness if it is the last thing I do." Natasha turns around after her speech and heads for the door.

"Hey!" Tony calls after her. Natasha turns and he launched his sword at her. She disappears in a puff of black smoke letting the sword crash on the ground.

The real world

A young girl Yelena is seen with a book that contains illustrations of Tony and Pepper on the page. She's seen getting on a bus to Boston. "That a good book?" An elderly woman asked. "This? Is more than a book." The young girl says her little accent coming out. "Oh?" She asked.

Boston, south station. "Thank you for riding Greyhound." The bus announcer said. Yelena gets off the bus and finds a taxi. "You take credit cards?" She asked holding up the card. "Where to, chief?" The driver asked.

╬╬═════════════╬╬

Asena sat in a restaurant waiting on her target to come for their 'date'. She takes a sip of wine knowing that she'd need it. She wore a pink dress with matching heels and her hair was curly. She sat crossed leg to stop her shaking. To be honest she was scared the guy wouldn't show. But he finally did. "Asena." He greeted.

"Ryan? You looked relieved." She said. "Well, it is the internet. Pictures can be..." He pauses trying to find the right word. "Fake, outdated. Stolen from a Victoria's Secret catalogue." She finished.

He nodded. "Sorry I'm late by the way." He says sitting down in the seat across from her after they greeted each other. "It's totally fine." She replied with a forced smile. "So... Um... Tell me something about yourself, Asena?" He asked nervously. "Oh. Ah, well, today's my birthday." She answered. "And you're spending it with me! What about your friends?" He asked.

𝐓𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐦𝐞 𝐈'𝐝 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐭𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐝𝐫𝐨𝐰𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐦𝐲 𝐬𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐨𝐰𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐒𝐜𝐨𝐭𝐜𝐡 𝐨𝐫 𝐕𝐨𝐝𝐤𝐚. She thought.

"Kind of a loner." She answered. "And, you don't like your family?" He asked. 𝐈 𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞. She thinks holding her facade.

"No family to like." She said taking another sip of wine. "Oh, come on. Everyone has family." Ryan says. "Technically, yeah. And everyone knows who they are? Ready to run yet?" She replied. "Oh not a chance. You, Asena, are by far, the sexiest, friendless orphan I have ever met." He said.

𝐖𝐚𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐬𝐮𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐦𝐞 𝐬𝐰𝐨𝐨𝐧? 𝐋𝐞𝐭'𝐬 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡. She thought. "Okay. Your turn. No wait let me guess. Umm... You are handsome, charming." She started internally gaging. "Go on." Ryan says.

"The kind of guy who— now stop me if I get this wrong — embezzled your former employer, got arrested, and skipped town before they could throw your ass in jail." She fake laughed. "What?" The man asked playing dumb. "And the worst part of all is your wife. Your wife loves you so much that she bailed you out, and how do you repay that loyalty? You're on a date." She finished off.

"Who are you?" The man asked. "The chick that put up the rest of the money." Asena answers. " You're a bails bondsman." Ryan realized. "Bail bondsperson." She corrected. Ryan flipped the table spilling everything on her and took off running. "Bloody Hell!" She groans.

Ryan runs across the street dodging cars and Asena just casually walks through traffic. He tries to start the ignition and looks to find a boot on his tire. "You don't have to do this, okay? I can pay you. I got money." Ryan bargained. "No, you don't. And if you did, you should give it to your wife and take care of your family." Asena said crossing her arms.

"The hell do you know about family, huh?" The man asked. "Nothing." She replied smashing his head against t he steering wheel. When Asena arrived home she kicks off her heels walked to the kitchen. She grabbed a bottle of Scotch and opened a box with a cupcake inside.

She opens the bottle and then puts a star shaped candle in the cupcake. "Another loner year." She lights it then closes her eyes and makes a wish. Theres a knock on the door and Asenas head snapped to it. She opens the door and sees a child. "Are you Asena Montgomery?" She asked. "Yeah?" She answered skeptically. "I'm Yelena and I'm your daughter." The younger blonde says. Yelena pushes past her and into the apartment. "Woah! Hey, kid! Kid! Kid! I don't have a daughter! Where are your parents?" Asena asked.

"Ten years ago. Did you give up a baby for adoption? That was me." Yelena explained. "... Give me a minute." The woman said going to the bathroom. She looked at herself in the mirror trying to compose herself. She didn't think that her past would catch up with her ten years later. Plus how could that little girl know that she was her mother?

She had a closed adoption which meant the kid shouldn't even know that she existed. "Hey do you have any juice? Never mind, found some." Yelena hollered from the kitchen. Asena leaves the bathroom after taking a deep breath. She sees the little girl drinking her orange juice straight from the bottle. "Gross." She said taking the bottle from the child. "You know, we should probably get going." Yelena realizes.

"Going where?" Asena asked confused. "I want you to come home with me." Yelena clarified. "Okay, kid. I'm calling the cops." Asena picked up her phone. "Then I'll tell them you kidnapped me." Yelena fired back. "And they'll believe you because I'm your birth mother." Asena huffed in realization. "Yep." The child hummed. "Fair played, but you and I both know you aren't gonna do that." Asena tilted her head in protest.

"Try me." The ten year old challenges. "You're pretty good. But here's the thing, there's a lot I'm good at and a hell of a lot I'm terrible at in life. I have 840 confirmed kills so murder obviously isn't one of them. Let's call it a superpower. I can tell when anyone's lying and you, kid, are." Asena explained to the girl. "Wait... Please don't call the cops. Please come home with me." Yelena begged.

"Where do you live?" Asena sighed. "Storybrooke, Maine." Yelena said. "Storybrooke? Are you serious?" Asena asked. Yelena hummed and nodded. "Alright then." Asena rubbed her temples.

Fairytale world

In the castle in the forest Pepper stood near the balcony, and a bluebird lands on her finger. "What's wrong?" Tony asked. "Nothing" Pepper snapped out of her daze. "You're thinking about what the Queen said again, aren't you? Pepper, please. I can't keep having this conversation. You have to let it go. We're about to have a baby." Pepper turns her head ashamed of being caught thinking about the threat.

She had agreed to try and move past that but how do you move past something like that, especially after you know that she will be true to her word. Pepper knew that Natasha would try everything in her power to take away her happiness. "I haven't had a restful night since our wedding." Pepper pointed out. And it was the truth, she hadn't slept well at all she felt as if she had to look over her shoulder consistently again. "That's what she wants - to get in your head. But they're only words. She can't hurt us." Tony reassured pulling her in.

"She poisoned an apple because the thought i was prettier than her. You have no idea what she's capable of." Pepper argued pulling out of his hold. He didn't get it and she needed him to get it. This woman has made her life hell for years. Natasha has had it out for her and wanted to see her dead and now this. " What can I do to ease your mind?" Tony asked starting to realize that he wasn't going to win this argument and that she wouldn't sleep until she got some type of clarity.

"Let me talk to him." Pepper answered. He was the only one who could give her that reassurance that her child would be safe. "Him? You don't mean..." Tony asked with a hint of fear. "I do." Pepper answered back with a look of determination. "No, no, no. It's too dangerous." Tony shut down the idea immedi ately. She couldn't be serious. She knew how dangerous he was. "He sees the future." Pepper points out. Tony made a face. He was scared he would admit that to no one but himself because he had to be strong for Pepper.

But that didn't mean he wanted help from the person he helped trap. that was suicide. "There's a reason he's locked up." Tony said logically. Pepper placed a hand on her swollen stomach. "Can you promise me that our child will be safe? Can you guarantee it? Because he can." Pepper questioned. The look on Pepper's face was enough to make him cave. Seeing her look so unlike her normal fearless self. "Alright. For our child." Pepper smiled in relief and Tony leaned in for a kiss. She had no idea how much power she had over him, and maybe that was a good thing.

Real world

Asena and Yelena were driving and the former had no idea what time it was. The drive was silent for the most part until Yelena broke it. "I'm hungry. Can we stop somewhere?" The girl asked. "This isn't a road trip kid. We aren't stopping for snacks." Asena replied. Yelena closed her book. "Why not?" She pestered. She was hungry she could feel her stomach growling.

She could also tell that they were close to home and she wasn't ready to go back yet. "Quit complaining, Kid. Remember i could've easily put your ass on a bus and let you go the same way you came." Asena said annoyed slightly. "You know i have a name right? It's Yelena." The blonde child pouted before opening her book again. "What's that." Asena asked just now noticing the big old looking book. "I'm not sure you're ready." Yelena flips through the pages. "Not ready for what? A bunch of fairytales?" Asena questioned scrunching up her face.

Yelena makes a face. These weren't just fairytales they were a truth and even if they were which she was pretty sure they weren't, they were a history, her history. "They aren't just fairytales they are a truth. Every story in this book is a truth, someone's truth. Every story in this book actually happened." Yelena deadpanned. "Of course they did." Asena sighed. It was a long night and this kid has made it longer. Yelena on the other hand was just huffing. How dare she not take her seriously.

"I know I sound crazy, but use your superpower, see if I'm lying." Yelena dared. Asena did and the girl was telling the truth. She wasn't about to let this kid slide though. "Just because you believe in something doesn't make it true. " Asena looked over at the page. "Uh no that's exactly what makes it true. You would know more than I would." Yelena scans through a page. "Oh really now? Why is that?" Asena asked. "Because you're in this book." Yelena flipped to the next page

"You have problems." Asena chuckles. This kid was crazy but so was she so she had no room to say anything. "Yep. And you're going to fix them." Yelena snorted. Asena laughed before switching lanes.

Enchanted Forest

Pepper and Tony are walking behind a guard with cloaks on their heads. The guard has a torch in his hand and he stops them just before they get to the cell. "When we reach the cell, stay out of the light. And whatever you do, do not let him know your name. If he knows your name, he wil have power over you." The guard warns, Pepper and Tony nod at him. "Loki. Loki! I have a question for you." The guard calls to the man in the cell.

Loki comes out of the shadows of the cell. "No, you don't They do. Pepper Potts and Tony Stark..." Loki rasped coming closer to the bars of the cell. "You insult my abilities. Step into the light and take off those ridiculous robes they don't suit you." Loki beckoned.

Pepper and Tony step into the light and slowly lower their hoods to reveal themselves. "Much better." Loki praises. "We've come to you about the..." Tony started before he was cut off. "Yes, yes, you idiot i know why you're here. You want to know about the queen's threat." Loki giggled before turning to the walls of the cell. "Tell us what you know and skip all the taunting." Tony deadpanned.

Loki was finding this amusing he could tell they were desperate. "Ooh tense, are we? Fear not! I can ease your mind. But... It's going to cost you something." Loki was playing with them he wanted nothing big they couldn't give him what he really wanted. Toying with them would be easy. "No he's just a waste of time." Tony turned to leave and Loki faked offence. "What do you want?" Pepper stepped forward and Tony spun around quickly. "Oh...The name of your unborn child." Loki said leaning against the stone of the wall with his arms crossed. "Absolutely not!" Tony protested.

"Deal! What do you know?" Pepper rushed out quickly. She needed to know she didn't have time for Tony's paranoia. Loki giggles and says, "The queen has created a powerful curse. And it's coming. Soon, you'll all be in a prison. Just like me only worse. Your prison, all of our prisons, will be time. Time will stop, and we will be trapped. Someplace horrible, where everything we hold dear, everything we love, will be ripped from us while we suffer for eternity. While the Queen celebrates, victorious at last. No more happy endings." Loki explains with a smile on his face. He laughs at the fact that they remain absolutely clueless and the fear that he could feel radiating from them. "What can we do?" Pepper asked with a sense of dread in her chest.

She was scared of the answer, well not the answer an answer one that could break her heart. "We can't do anything." Loki emphasizes the we. Because in truth they couldn't there was nothing Pepper, himself, Tony could do. "Who can?" Pepper asked again with that same feeling of dread. "That little thing, growing inside your belly. " Loki moves his hand, in a gesture, towards Pepper's stomach. Tony draws his sword quickly and slashes at his hand. "Hands off reindeer games. Next time I cut it off." Tony sheathed his sword and placed a hand on his wife's lower back. Loki tsks and glances at his hand. "The infant is our only hope. Get the child to safety. Get the child to safety and Ion it's twenty-eighth birthday, the child will return. The child will find you and the final battle will begin." Loki says in a sing song voice before spinning on his heel and moving away from the bars.

Tony didn't like that answer and he made it clear by saying, "We've heard enough. We're leaving." And he guided Pepper to the exit. "Hey! No! We made a deal! I want her name! We had a deal! I need her name! I want her name!" Loki growls and angrily hits the bars. "Her? It's a boy." Tony rests his hand on Pepper's bump. "Missy... Missy... You know I'm right. Tell me, what's her name?" Loki asked in a much more calmer voice. "Asena. Her name is Asena." Pepper sighed and started to walk again. "Asena..." Loki mumbled.

#natasha romanoff x reader #natasha x you #ouat au #Swanqueenau #natasha romanoff x oc #Enchantment au #Enchantment fic:

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do-it-for-the-fandom · 2 years

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Caskett at the old haunt with Ryan, espo and lanie

Shots. Shots were a bad idea. He wasn't even sure who's idea they were... probably his. He had a bad habit of showing off. He had probably challenged someone. Who knows. All he knew right was that they were all drunk. Beyond drunk. They were wasted.

They all ended up at The Old Haunt. It wasn't even planned. He had left earlier in the evening, trying to catch his staff during a lull to have an impromptu meeting. Nothing formal, just a check in. Trying to be a good boss... a present boss, not just the dude who owned the place.

By the time he resurfaced from the hidden basement, Ryan and Espo had arrived and were working on their first round of drinks. After the case they'd just solved, he knew it wasn't a one beer kind of night. He shot Beckett a quick text and joined the boys. She arrived with Lanie not long after.

The place had cleared out about an hour later, and Perry was closing up for the night. He had encouraged the ladies to take control of the new Juke Box Castle had installed, singing along with their song selections and laughing with them as they danced freely in the otherwise empty bar.

The young man approached the guys at their booth, shyly attempting to gain Castle's attention. "I'm all done now, Mr Castle. Are you sure you don't want me to call a cab?"

Castle rested his hand on Perry's shoulder. He was quite fond of the kid - a naïve 23, with that small-town charm that you just know you can trust. "I'm fine Perry. Go home, get some rest. I'll lock up."

He tilted his head in thanks. "Thanks, boss."

And then there were five...

"Boss?" Esposito's eyes lit up. "Boss!"

"You make the poor kid call you Boss?" Ryan teased.

Beckett's laugh echoed between songs as she made her way back to the booth. "He loves being called Boss. Don't ya, Castle." She snaked her hand across his chest, climbing into the booth beside him.

He smiled up at her, wrapping his arm around her waist as she leant into him. "You know... in just a few months, you'll be Mrs Boss."

"Ooh," she purred. "I like that."

"Oh yeah?" He pulled her closer, kissing her tenderly.

"Booo, get a room!" The boys pleaded, but Lanie's cheering only encouraged them.

"You two are like horny teenagers." She added, once they managed to pull themselves away from each other.

"I can't believe you guys are getting married" Espo mused, diffusing the tension and creating a much more sentimental energy in the air. He had watched his friends come so far over the years, and yet it still felt so... crazy.

"Remember when Castle first showed up?" Ryan started laughing at whatever memory he was thinking of. He obviously hadn't received the sentimental memo. "Dude, she hated you."

"She didn't hate me." Castle replied confidently, looking to Beckett for confirmation. She just smiled and shook her head, darting her eyes away from his. Guilty.

"I don't know... she certainly didn't like you." Lanie added. "I mean, I was telling her to get all over that from day one, but she was determined not to."

Castle theatrically shook his head, "Tsk, tsk... imagine if you had just listened to her." He quipped.

"It never would have worked out, Castle." She stated matter of factly, grinning at Lanie who had suffered through many of Beckett's logical, reasoning rants. "You were such a jackass."

She looked him in the eye, expecting to see some sort of defence. Instead, she saw... victory?

"Yeah... drove you wild, right?"

"You say that like it's a good thing."

"Isn't it?" He was cocky.

She attempted her best glare, but in her alcohol-infused haze it was seeming like a good thing. Without his constant irritation, the way he infiltrated her life... her thoughts... her heart.

She gave up on glaring, replacing the look with a warm smile. She reached for the near-empty glass she had been working on earlier and raised it in the air.

"To driving each other wild..." She toasted.

He reached for his glass, "May we continue to do so for the rest of our lives." He added, touching his glass to hers with a clink.

Their friends joined in the toast, touching their glasses together and gleefully cheering, "Cheers!"

#caskett #kate beckett #fandom #richard castle #castle #fanfic #rick castle #ficlet #lanie parish #kevin ryan #javier esposito #the old haunt #fanfiction prompts #story prompt #my drabbles

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patrickjonesblog · 9 months

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Top Albums of 2023

Hey, how ya doing? I got sick the last week of 2023 when I intended to write this so here I am in 2024 looking back on some of my favorite long players last year.

I saw so many of my favorite acts in 2023, it was probably the best live music year ever. So much so I spent what felt like a whole morning creating a "reel" on "instagram". The fruits of which you can watch here.

Enough about live music though, this is about wonderful studio recordings, so here's what's made the long list and then we'll kick straight into the top 10 with accompanying videos.

16 - Romy - Mid Air

15- Jessie Ware - That! Feels! Good!

14- Gracie Abrams - Good Riddance

13 - Lana Del Rey - Did you know there's a tunnel under Ocean Blvd?

12 - Bombay Bicycle Club - My Big Day

11 - The Bug Club - Rare Birds: Hour of Song

10 - Young Fathers - Heavy Heavy

If you haven't seen Young Fathers Glastonbury set in 2023, I recommend you do so after you've read this blog. Gutted they cancelled their brooklyn show, but I hope to catch it this year.

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9 - Caroline Polachek - Desire, I Want to Turn Into You

Caroline Polacheck is the closest we've got to Kate Bush in 2023, the detail she puts into her visuals and the choreography of her performances, its high art. The track below isn't on the album, but it was the moment I realized her brilliance.

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8 - Gorillaz - Cracker Island

This felt like an under the radar release from Gorillaz, at least here in the states. It's the first time Albarn has worked with Greg Kurstin (Adele, Mccartney, Kendrick) and you can hear his influence as it's a bit more poppy than previous releases.

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7 - Jeff Rosenstock - Hellmode

If you've read any of my blogs over the past decade you will have seen a lot of appearances from US Punk / Ska legend Jeff. The reason being; he doesn't make bad records.

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6 - Sleaford Mods - UK Grim

How do you follow 2021's career highlight Spare Ribs? With more of the same, that's how. 12 albums in to their career now and they're still gathering pace. Blistering, acerbic, hilarious as ever.

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5 - The Hives - The Death of Randy Fitzsimmons

The first new music from The Hives in 11 years and they return with a literal bang. This album is as good as anything they came out with when they first charmed their way onto the scene in the early 2000's. The bellies may be podgier, Pelle's kicks aren't as high, but the riffs are as spritely as ever. Still one of the greatest live bands around.

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4 - Blur - Ballad of Darren

I always get a bit anxious about a new blur album, they don't have to release new music, they have a back catalog that guarantees them legend status already. Releasing new music risks tainting that legacy so far into their career. I needn't worry, Ballad of Darren is a beautiful record with a legitimate brand new stadium filling anthem to add to their repertoire.

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3 - Olivia Rodrigo - GUTS

Bit of a surprise this one, maybe more for me than you dear reader. I didn't get the fuss of the first album (still don't) it sounded like any one of a million young pop darlings. But GUTS is different, it's eclectic, it's beautifully written, it tears at your heart, it raises your fists, it makes you dance. It has everything really. She's the real deal. It's objectively not made for a 42 year old man, but great music is great music and I bloody love this.

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2 - Jenny Lewis - Joy'All

It was a tough call between this and Olivia, but i've given it to Jenny for the 20+ years experience she has on the young upstart. Jenny Lewis is maturing into a fine groove, she's replaced Ryan Adams as a much more palletable country-folk spot in my heart. Her songwriting continues to get better with age.

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1 - The National - First Two Pages of Frankenstein | Laugh Track

Stadium filling, Taylor Swift collaborating, David Letterman approved super band The National. It's a wild trajectory my favorite band has taken over the last few years. No longer critically acclaimed everyones favorite unheard of band, they're rightly at the upper table of indie-rock and its fully deserved. Not satisfied with releasing one beautiful record this year they follow it up soon after with the surprise Laugh Track an equally brilliant album in its own right. Most bands would kill to have one record this good in their whole career, its frankly not fair they can do two this good in a year. A joint number one for me as I can't separate them.

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There you have it, 2023 all wrapped up, full of BIG acts with a smattering of newbies thrown in for good measure and probably the most female representation I've had in an end of year list.

You can hear these and LOADS more in my 2023 playlist.

And if you like any of this and trust my judgement follow my 2024 playlist which I curate throughout the year adding newly released tracks.

Aaaaaand away...

#Instagram #Youtube #the national #jenny lewis #olivia rodrigo #best of 2023 #blur #gorillaz #new music

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hopelessromantic1352 · 1 year

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New Beginnings- Chapter 13

After their relationship is outed, Thomas stresses over how to protect Natalia’s career and image. Thanks as always @alj4890 for helping me and convincing me my writing sounds ok 🤣

Warning: swearing, light sexual innuendos/actions

Tags: @alleksa16 @alj4890 @kuladekiwi @lxaah11 @lilyoffandoms @moodyvalentinestories please let me know if you would like to be added or removed from this taglist!

“What the hell is going on, Hunt?”

Lucas, Thomas’ agent has never raised his voice towards the director, but today has been filled with uncharacteristic surprises involving the brooding and (supposed) eligible bachelor.

His polished, brown Santoni’s echo against the marble flooring in the grand entry until they meet the threads of a Persian rug. He stops, pinching the bridge of his nose and he releases a deep sigh.

“This was not supposed to be public information until after the movie had been released.”

“And when was I going to be informed?” Thomas closes his eyes, “Cause where I’m standing, you’d think telling your agent would be a high priority. Especially when you want to keep news out of the news!”

He stares at the wall, clenching his jaw. “I kept it from you in hopes of keeping it from everyone. I did not see any point in revealing a private relationship to you.”

The younger agent nearly growls in frustration and Thomas has to pull the phone away from his ear. “This kind of thing ruins careers, Hunt! I didn’t think I had to tell you that. You aren’t some stupid, young, think with your other head kid that has too much fame to go around. You’re smart and don’t let things like this happen.”

He could not begin to fathom how he had let this happen. He told Natalia he would not be the reason her career was brought to ruin. Yet here he was, listening to his agent scold him as though he was a new arrival to the despicable world of Hollywood. As though he was a child.

“It’s time you go on the offensive. Get your ass back to LA and take her out as soon as she’s feeling up to it.” Lucas takes a shuddering breath, his anger simmering on the surface, “Until then, keep your fucking head down.”

Thomas winces and internally cringes at the foul language. He despises using obscenities, despite the occasional use in his head, he tries to never use the words out loud. It was ungentlemanly. It was not him.

Lucas hung up before Thomas could say anything or defend himself further, so he simply shut his phone off and began to pace the marble flooring once more. There were no upcoming awards ceremonies or any parties he knew of, but then again, he usually did not attend such parties.

He paced for another minute or so before he decided on calling his friend.

“Ryan, I must skip pleasantries—“

“I saw the news.” His friend cut him off and silence stretched between them for a few moments.

“Are there any upcoming high profile parties?” Thomas simply stares out the front windows, watching as branches sway in the cool breeze outside.

The estate is quiet today, aside from Mr. DuBois and Elizabeth, and it felt empty. Perhaps it was just the added stressful situation grabbing at his brain.

“Chris has a premier coming up in a few weeks. After that, we’ve got a few birthdays that’ll definitely hit the tabloids. What’s on your mind?” The friendliness in the charming actor’s voice was one of the many reasons Thomas gets along with him.

They’ve known each other for ages, although Ryan doesn’t show his age, his maturity does. He matured in a way Thomas respects and although the man can get on his nerves, much like all his close friends, it never irks him for too long. Vice versa, when Thomas gets in one of his moods, Ryan brushes it off because the elder man is just too serious to let loose. Or so Mr. Summers says.

“It’s time I show the world how much Natalia means to me. The minute she feels ready, we will be attending parties and taking the offensive so I can salvage her image. Can I trust you will assist?”

“Of course. I’ll enlist the others too. We care about you, Hunt, almost as much as we care about Nat.” The chuckle only forces the director’s lips into a tight scowl.

“Much appreciated.” Without a goodbye, he hangs up, leaving Ryan to his own amusement.

THREE MONTHS LATER

Months had come and gone. Most of Natalia’s time was spent resting between physical therapy sessions and editing film with Thomas. Since the accident their friends rallied around the couple and helped with whatever Thomas would allow them to. Everyone chipped in here and there, whether it was regarding the film or navigating the media or just day to day tasks at home.

Now that she’s up again, they’ve needed help less and less thankfully. Her physical therapist has gotten her walking without a cane or any assistance and she knew what that meant.

“The premier is this weekend.” She laid between Thomas’ legs on the couch, eyeing the scar on her right leg as he tightens his arms around her waist. “How are you feeling?”

Insecure.

The bruises and cuts have healed on her face, leaving behind only minuscule scars in a couple spots. He swears no one can see them, but she can. Her eyes leave the scar on her leg and move to the long reminder on her forearm. Gently, her fingers follow its path.

She never thought of herself as beautiful or gorgeous. But now the doubts about herself are only enhanced by the defects on her skin.

“I’ll have to buy a new gown.” Deflecting his question, she focuses on what she would want. “Something floor-length with long sleeves.”

The man holding her nods, but moves a hand to gently trace a line down her arm, sending delicious shivers up her skin. Since the wreck, they had not been intimate and she has been aching for him. Besides chaste kisses that didn’t lead to anything more, she’d begun to doubt his feelings for her. He always said he loves her, which she reciprocated, but don’t actions speak louder? It’s been nearly a year they’ve been together, but still, they have not been together. The accident ruined any chance of that happening after New York when she was ready to give herself to him. So for a few months, her need for him has only increased with no way of acting on it. But now she can walk, surely they can finally give in.

“Why must you cover yourself so much?” His deep voice is hushed and his breath brushes against her ear as his finger is now trailing circles across her exposed thigh.

She internally scolds herself for wearing shorts around him.

“I’m not certain I’m ready to show off the new additions to my skin.” His finger slowly moves higher, to the inside of her thigh and pauses.

Natalia’s breath hitches and she feels a new hardness pushing into her back.

Without any warning, he had flipped their positions on the couch and now braces himself above her. Not even registering what exactly was happening, he presses a deep kiss to her mouth, suffocating any questions that were rising. It didn’t take any time for her body to react, wrapping her arms around his neck as one of his hands slide down her belly, stopping at the waistband of her shorts.

He broke away, looking down at her with darkening eyes that hold an equal amount of love and lust. “This body may have imperfections now, but that does not take away from the fact that every single part of you is beautiful. What has been left on you only shows the world what troubles you have overcome to be where you are now.”

Thomas pauses, his voice becoming deeper as the emotion he feels continues to grow. Love, grief, anguish for what she had suffered. He can see her eyes welling with tears, her hands busying themselves in his hair, so he reaches a hand up, leaving her waist, and gently places it on her cheek. The soft, olive skin is damp from a rogue tear, so he wipes it dry before his thumb moves along her cheekbone.

“My love for you is not only for your looks, my darling, it is for your heart and soul. You should pride yourself on everything you have survived and fought through to get where you are today. You are where you want to be and a handful of scars will never take that away from you.”

The more he spoke and the more he caressed her cheek just made her heart melt. “Thomas—“

Her voice cracks and tears fall slowly before he leans down and kisses her gently. “I love you, sweetheart.”

The gentleness in his voice, the sweetness in his touch, when she closes her eyes and focuses on him completely, that’s when she knows. He really does love her.

“I love you too.”

The next day, she, Addison, and Holly went shopping for gowns. The girls expressed how Natalia was happier than they’d seen for a long time. But the night of the premier, she couldn’t be more nervous.

Her almost sheer silvery, white dress is flowy enough for her to feel free. She knew her nerves were going to be enough for the night, she didn’t want to feel constructed in her gown. The jewels spattered across the material almost convinced Natalia not even to try it on, but Addi convinced her otherwise.

The fashionista had said , “This is your first premier with your sexy, reclusive director… I can’t believe I just called him sexy.” She then proceeded to make a gagging noise before she thrusted the dress into her friend’s arms. “You need to make a splash and get everyone’s attention.”

Since the surgery on her arm, she hasn’t gotten the full use of it yet, so Addison is at Thomas’ doing Nat’s hair. “I love your hair.”

The blonde sighs as she pins curls atop her friend’s head. Natalia has let her hair grow out, the ends a lighter, bleached brown compared to the rest of her deep chestnut color.

“Thanks Addi, I love how you did your hair and your dress.” Her nerves keep her mind occupied so she just gave a short, simple reply to her friend who looks at her worriedly.

Addison has her hair curled with one side pinned back and a bright blue, sparkly gown that fits her slim figure perfectly. “You ok?”

“Hmm?” Natalia looks up and shakes her head, focusing. “I’m fine, I suppose I’m just..”

“Nervous?” She finishes the brunette’s hair and sprays a little hairspray to keep everything in place. After a small nod, she sits on the counter facing Nat. “You don’t have any reason to be nervous. You’ll have Thomas right next to you, Holly and I won’t be far away and of course Ryan and Chris.”

“I know that, it just seems as though things have gone wrong so much as of late and now I’m going out into the public eye for the first time since the accident.” Her eyes inadvertently look at the scar along her forearm, sighing quietly.

Addison catches the movement and she sets a gentle hand on her friend's shoulder, “I think those scars are cool, and if I were you, I’d show them off like a badge of honor.”

Someone behind them clears their throat, urging both the women to turn around. “You both look beautiful.”

Although Thomas says it to both of them, his dark eyes are fixed on Natalia, roaming the curves of her dress and dancing across the updo until they land on her lips. She wears a deep blush that only accentuates her makeup and her eyes meet his every darkening ones again before looking down at her gown.

Addison’s eyes dart back and forth between the two, feeling the sexual tension rising with every second before she suddenly stands, “Thanks, Thomas, I’m gonna head out and meet with Holly. See you two at the premiere.”

When she passes her former professor, she doesn’t look him in the eye and he pays no mind to her either. “You look absolutely stunning.”

Uncomfortable and unsure how to respond, Natalia stands and grips the skirt of her dress subconsciously. As she looks up at him, her breath is taken away. His taut muscles fill his tuxedo, not able to hide the broad shoulders or narrow waist. Her tongue slides across her bottom lip as he adjusts his cufflinks, smirking at her.

Looking away after being caught ogling, she just releases a breath and smiles softly, “Thank you.”

Her quiet response has Thomas moving towards her, gathering her in his strong arms and securing her in a warm embrace. “Any particular reason for your sudden shyness?”

His warm, tender lips move down and across her cheekbone, eliciting quiet moans from her. “Because you just have that effect on me, Mr. Hunt. You seem to bring out a very submissive side that I have no control over.”

A quiet animalistic growl comes from Thomas, his arms tighten around her waist as the admission from her ignites a fire inside him. “We may be fashionably late to this premiere.”

Soon his lips and teeth travel down her neck, careful not to leave marks but firm enough to get her heart racing. As her hands begin to wander, slipping to the front of his slacks, a phone breaks their passion causing Thomas to groan in frustration.

Scowling deeply, he fishes his phone out of pocket, his eyes flashing with concern before he answers. “Yes?”

His gaze settles on Natalia, who is checking her hair and makeup in the mirror. Her eyes meet his and her heart lurches at the worry he wears on his face.

“Yes, I will inform her. Thank you.”

Thomas doesn’t have time to pocket his phone before she places a hand on his arm. “What’s happened?”

“Lucas had been investigating who tipped off our relationship and he says he has finally found the source.”

By the expression on his face, her heart clenches in her chest. “Who was it?”

#choices #playchoices #thomas hunt #red carpet diaries #choices red carpet diaries #thomas orson hunt #choices rcd #professor hunt #rcd #red carpet diaries 2 #red carpet diaries 3 #play choices #thomas hunt x oc #thomas hunt fanfiction #choices fic writers creations #thomas hunt x natalia york

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lemonhemlock · 1 year

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The thing is if anyone says that Daemon and maybe Criston were possibly subjected to Alys' charms you will immediately be accused of being a misogynist. Just try suggesting that on Twitter or on Reddit, it will be like detonating a bomb in real time. Some will even lose their minds if you even dare to call her a witch. This is why nobody even tries to reason with those people anymore. Book readers who still remember the little that was being discussed online about all of this before the show know you could have a normal debate back then on what may have actually happened in the book with those two by analyzing every scenario the text implies but right now it's impossible to do so due to the fact that antis and crazies who only use the character to project onto her have hijacked this part of the fandom and everything they do is bully people with different opinions. As for Aemond's age, well, firstly I have to say I love how defensive they get when his young age is pointed out, be it 16 in the show which is the maximum he can be given the timeline (I also still believe they meant for him to be at least 18 and messed up, but alas, here we are) or 19 in the book. They'll just say it's two adults falling in love and end of story. This parallel was pointed out in the past by other anons I think but the relationship also reminds me of Nettles and Daemon. She is 16 years old when she first appears in the story (and yes, also an adult by Westerosi standards if I'm not mistaken?), but normally she would still also be way too young for Daemon and the whole affair is very icky, if she's indeed his lover and not his daughter, yet I don't see antis applying the same logic to them, instead they only use the relationship to point out that Daemon is a groomer. Not that it's not true, because it is, but you see the double standards. This teenager/barely adult young man x older adult woman ship? Good. The other one bad.

I myself had an anon at one point that I think was trying to suggest Alys being a witch is made up because of sexism, when I pointed out that this ship isn't viable, as Aemond cannot bring a literal representation of the supernatural with him back into the Red Keep.

I also believe they meant for him to be older, but messed up the maths or didn't realise the clownish implications it would have for future seasons, but, like you, I wish this debate would die already. Yes, Ryan specified the ages of 17-21 for them, but it's physically impossible for Aemond to be older than 16, with the time-jumps they themselves specified in the show - 10 years after ep. 5 and 6 years after Driftmark. I do not care what Ryan or anyone else says in this regard, confess that you don't know how to do basic algebra and just retcon it or whatever, but both cannot be true at the same time. This isn't Dark on Netflix, we're not time-travelling or in parallel universes ffs, Aemond cannot grow older when he has maximum 16 years of linear time to do so.

And even if we go by FB, where he's 19-20 and Alys is "at least 40 years old, that much is known", nobody would be peddling the argument that it's two adults falling in love. By all means, nobody is telling you not to ship it, just to stop insisting on this weird orwellian imposition that everything is fine and dandy between them.

In any case, this is a very complex discussion of power dynamics, as in this very specific case it is muddled enough that it's not entirely evident who abuses whom. On the one hand, Alys can be the manipulative older woman, who also taps into the paranormal and is empowered as a result of that, so not a person to be trifled with. On the other hand, Aemond, while younger, still has a tremendous amount of social, political and military power he can lord over Alys. He is a prince of the realm, he has Vhagar and he has the power to put her entire family to the sword.

Anyway, I expect that in future seasons daemyras and daettles* are going to go hard against alysmonds and throw the age argument right back in their faces. They're going to be warring over this aspect to the moon and back, when it's such a stupid hill to die on. Accept it as the problematic** ship that it is and live your life in peace. Glass houses/candles and all.

*or whatever the ship name is for daemon/nettles

**god, i h8 that word, but nothing better comes to mind rn

#ask #anon #riverdragon #anti alysmond

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hits1000 · 2 years

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Top Songs of 1983 - Hits of 1983

Top Songs of 1983 - Hits of 1983 Top Songs of 1983 including: 1983 AC/DC - Guns For Hire, Air Supply - Making Love Out Of Nothing At All, Billy Joel - Uptown Girl, Bonnie Tyler - Total Eclipse of the Heart, Bryan Adams - Straight From The Heart, Elton John - I'm Still Standing, Michael Jackson – Thriller and many more! Subscribe to our channel to see more of our content! 1. 1983 AC/DC - Guns For Hire 2. 1983 Air Supply - Making Love Out Of Nothing At All 3. 1983 Alaska y Dinarama - Perlas Ensangrentadas 4. 1983 Bananarama - Cruel Summer 5. 1983 Barón Rojo - Casi Me Mato 6. 1983 Billy Joel - Uptown Girl 7. 1983 Bob Marley & The Wailers - Buffalo Soldier 8. 1983 Bonnie Tyler - Total Eclipse of the Heart 9. 1983 Bryan Adams - Straight From The Heart 10. 1983 Corinne Hermès - Si La Vie Est Cadeau 11. 1983 Culture Club - Karma Chameleon 12. 1983 Cyndi Lauper - Girls Just Want To Have Fun 13. 1983 David Bowie - Let's Dance 14. 1983 Def Leppard - Photograph 15. 1983 DÖF - Codo (...düse im Sauseschritt) 16. 1983 Dolly Parton & Kenny Rogers - Islands In The Stream 17. 1983 Donna Summer - She Works Hard For The Money 18. 1983 Duran Duran - Is There Something I Should Know? 19. 1983 Eddy Grant - Electric Avenue 20. 1983 Electric Light Orchestra - Rock 'N' Roll Is King 21. 1983 Elton John - I Guess That's Why They Call It The Blues 22. 1983 Elton John - I'm Still Standing 23. 1983 Eurythmics - Sweet Dreams (Are Made Of This) 24. 1983 Frank Stallone - Far From Over 25. 1983 Frankie Goes To Hollywood - Relax 26. 1983 Freeez - IOU 27. 1983 Gazebo - I Like Chopin 28. 1983 Gonzalo - Quién Piensa En Ti 29. 1983 Irene Cara - What A Feeling (Flashdance) 30. 1983 Jimmy Cliff - Reggae Night 31. 1983 John Mellencamp - Pink Houses 32. 1983 José Cid - Portuguesa Bonita 33. 1983 Journey - Separate Ways (Worlds Apart) 34. 1983 Kajagoogoo - Too Shy 35. 1983 KC & The Sunshine Band - Give It Up 36. 1983 Laid Back - Sunshine Reggae 37. 1983 Lime - Guilty 38. 1983 Lionel Richie - All Night Long (All Night) 39. 1983 Madonna - Holiday 40. 1983 Masquerade - Guardian Angel 41. 1983 Matthew Wilder - Break My Stride 42. 1983 Mecano - Barco A Venus 43. 1983 Men Without Hats - The Safety Dance 44. 1983 Michael Jackson - Beat It 45. 1983 Michael Jackson - Billie Jean 46. 1983 Michael Jackson - Thriller 47. 1983 Michael Sembello - Maniac 48. 1983 Mike Oldfield & Maggie Reilly - Moonlight Shadow 49. 1983 NEA - 989 Luftbalons 50. 1983 Nino De Angelo - Jenseits von Eden 51. 1983 Pat Benatar - Love Is A Battlefield 52. 1983 Paul McCartney & Michael Jackson - Say Say Say 53. 1983 Paul Young - Come Back And Stay 54. 1983 Paul Young - Love of the Common People 55. 1983 Real Life - Send Me An Angel 56. 1983 Righeira - Vamos A La Playa 57. 1983 Robin Gibb - Juliet 58. 1983 Rod Stewart - Baby Jane 59. 1983 Rod Stewart - What Am I Gonna Do (I'm So In Love With You) 60. 1983 Ryan Paris - Dolce Vita 61. 1983 Slade - My Oh My 62. 1983 Spandau Ballet - Gold 63. 1983 Spandau Ballet - True 64. 1983 The Flying Pickets - Only You 65. 1983 The Kinks - Come Dancing 66. 1983 The Police - Every Breath You Take 67. 1983 The Romantics - Talking In Your Sleep 68. 1983 The Smiths - This Charming Man 69. 1983 Thompson Twins - Hold Me Now 70. 1983 Thompson Twins - Lies 71. 1983 Tino Casal – Embrujada 72. 1983 Toto Cutugno - L'Italiano 73. 1983 Tracey Ullman - They Don't Know 74. 1983 Trans-X - Living On Video 75. 1983 U2 - New Year's Day 76. 1983 U2 - Sunday Bloody Sunday 77. 1983 UB40 - Red Red Wine 78. 1983 Vídeo - La Noche No Es Para Mí 79. 1983 Wham! - Club Tropicana 80. 1983 Yes - Owner Of A Lonely Heart Related Searches: Greatest Hits of 1983, Best Jukebox 1983 Playlist, Late 1983 Non Stop , Top 1983 Non Stop, Mix 1983 Compilation, Best 1983 List, Late 1983 UK, Best 1983 Playlist, Best 1983 Non Stop, Best 1983 Video, Greatest 1983 Non Stop, Mix 1983 Playlist, Best Jukebox 1983 List, List of 1983 Mix, Top 1983 USA, Best Songs of 1983, Top Music 1983, Hits of 1983 Relate Hashtags: #songsof1983 #hits1983 #songs1983 #listof1983mix #hits1983 #bestsongs1983 #classic1983playlist #greatest1983nonstop #best1983list #best1983video #top1983mix #greatest1983video #mix1983playlist #top1983nonstop #mix1983compilation https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fzT6er00YIM

#80S Greatest Hits #Songs Of 1980S #Old Songs #80S Songs #80S Music Hits #80S Hits #80S Songs Playlist #Grea

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dxrkenedheights · 1 year

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Name: Ryan Cross

Age & Birthday: 38 years old, July 4th 1985

Gender/Pronouns: cis man he/him

Birthplace: Atlanta, Georgia

Time in Atlanta: 38 years

Neighborhood: Center Hill

Association: Reapers

Occupation: Firefighter / Member

Positive personality traits: Hard-Working, Passionate, Sociable, Humorous

Negative personality traits: Boisterous, Competitive, Possessive, Vindictive

Faceclaim: Charlie Hunnam

ABOUT:

Being raised as a Cross isn't an easy upbringing. Ryan can't recall many happy memories unless they involve his brothers. Being one of four wasn't an easy task either, sometimes possible to get lost among all of the big personalities. Ryan is sociable and outgoing and known to be more approachable than his twin, Hunter. He's more practical minded than Wolf and more care-free than Elliot. He's good at logical and rational advise over a few beers and tries to stave off any doom and gloom.

Ryan learned from a young age that being respectful could be an advantage instead of weakness which shaped his outgoing nature. Some would be inclined to call him charming but he's a Cross after all and chaos finds them in one way or another. For Ryan it's his possessive and vindictive nature. He doesn't like to lose and can become stubborn and heated if things he cares about are under threat, no matter how small. He can become boisterous with aggressive outbursts in response to perceived threats or loss which appear as nothing to anybody unaware of the deeper reasons.

While Ryan wasn't shocked or saddened that his father was forced out of Center Hill, their mother's death impacted him more than he cared to admit. A lot of his behaviors were exasperated during this time and he threw himself into work in order to leave the trailer in which she died in.

Ryan can be glory-seeking and he gravitates to situations where he will be applauded which was why he joined working as a firefighter as soon as he was able to. He is known to try and twist situations so he's never in the wrong, a survival instinct he also learned thanks to his father. It also was natural for him to join The Reapers but eventually his criminal activities caught up with him, sending him back and forth to jail over long periods of time.

He lost his job as a result two years ago and only was able to earn it back after attending strict reform programs. Luckily, Ryan has always been convincing and has returned to his role without compromising his position within the gang.

He began dating Tammie Jones seven years ago, a relationship that was known to be intense in all the best and worst ways. They were on and off frequently and Ryan's long stints in jail were often the cause for a lot of their issues along with their stubborn personalities never backing down. Despite this, the two were crazy about each other and were eventually engaged until their worst argument yet happened a year ago. When he returned home to fix things up, he found his best friend's truck outside. His suspicions grew about Beau and Tammie's closeness, not able to trust either of them since. He said nothing due to having no proof and six months ago became a father to little Faith Cross. Accusations swirl his mind daily, and Ryan isn't his best self when the things he cares about are under threat.

#introducing: ryan cross #atlnightsryan

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mbb-project-entity · 2 years

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Chapter 35

Months had passed since Rinni had last seen Dr. Gemwood. She had healed up after her latest surgeries some time ago, and was enjoying her new job at a cocktail bar. At one time she would have been in the middle of college, but that possibility was long gone, and all she knew now was her new life. She even had her name changed. Rinni was too cutesy, too young, so she had it changed to Rosalyn. She felt it was much more refined and still sexy. She loved her new life; her wet pussy never felt better as she was being fucked over a crate in the storage room. She took in each thrust, appreciating the young man’s fairly large cock and happy that someone at her age was still able to get action like this.

“Oh Ryan, fuck me harder baby! Fill me up!” She moaned in a voice sounding raspy from heavy drinking and smoking. She pressed her ass backwards into the man’s crotch, causing him to moan as well.

“Nggh! You just might earn that promotion sweetie!”

Rosalyn smiled as things were going according to plan. She knew her boss was younger than her, but it didn’t bother her. In fact she kind of had a thing for guys a bit younger than her. They were easier to manipulate. Besides, at 32 with her skillset she didn’t have many options for moving up. At the very least he was a pretty good fuck, she thought.

She thought ‘pretty good’ as Ryan’s crotch slapped into her ass, because while he was big, she was much looser. Part of Dr. Gemwood’s surgeries was making her vagina be more realistically old, and so Rosalyn’s slit was gaping wide, lips distended, able to take just about any cock easily. The former ‘Rinni’ didn’t know it was surgery, and assumed it was simply due to her age and all the sex she had imagined having up until now.

Ryan’s cock began tensing up, and Rosalyn knew he was about to release. She clenched down on his member as he let loose, filling the condom. He lay on top of her for a moment, and then got up.

“Clean this up for me will you babe?” Ryan motioned at his penis, covered in his jizz after he removed the condom.

She smiled at him and went to work, licking his cock clean.

Ryan pulled up his pants and flashed her a smile as he walked off, “You’d better clean yourself up too. Customers are waiting. I’ll see about that promotion sometime, my little slut.”

When he left the room her smile reversed. She lay on the floor and looked down at herself, thinking about how she’s made herself into a slut. Her loose pussy was evidence enough, but the rest of her screamed slut as well. Bleached hair, tons of large jewelry, copious amounts of makeup, including slutty red lipstick and drawn on eyebrows. She ran her 1-inch long red fingernails across the tattoo right above her pussy; it read ‘Mama’s Cunt’. She thought she might regret it someday but not right now.

On a younger looking body she might have looked like a porn star, but she just looked like a desperate single woman, who knows she’s going to run out of time to be sexy soon. Her skin was the color of fake tan, her boobs were beginning to sag from many months of nipple weights, and her face had the aged look of someone who had too much plastic surgery, yet she still had heavy bags under her eyes from months of poor sleep. Her jawline was even aged now; one of the last things she had done was being given a stronger jawline. She knew that it would make her look older, but she also had a fetish for it, and she thought that it wouldn’t hurt too much since she was already 32.

She’s been getting better at using her charms to manipulate men, but she still wasn’t great at it. Sometimes she was still used like this, and didn’t get her way. Younger men were easier targets though, and she took a chance with Ryan.

“Not a total loss,” she said aloud to no one, “at least his cock was big.”

“Was it now?” A figure entered the room, causing Rosalyn to turn around surprised.

“Oh it’s just you. Don’t scare me like that, Miriam!”

“Hey sis, I told you, call me Mixie!”

“Ugh, fine, MIXIE. You’re too old for a name like that!”

“We’re both only 32!” Mixie countered.

Much like Rosalyn, Miriam changed her name to Mixie, but in her case it was because she wanted a cuter name. Mother and daughter stood next to each other, looking and believing that they were sisters, though their styles couldn’t be more different. Rosalyn was the sexy slut, and Miriam, now Mixie, had gone from a rich sultry look to a cheap, cutesy one. Her blonde hair was now in curls, with a pink ribbon on one side, and bangs dyed pink. She wore a frilly dress, with white stockings and black Mary Janes. They were supposed to be sisters of the same age, but with recent work to make her look younger, the reality was that Mixie looked 5 years younger than 32 and Rosalyn 5 years older.

“Anyway,” Mixie teased, “someone’s been having some fun with the manager hmm?”

Rosalyn waved her away, “I will neither confirm nor deny any allegations. But I will say he might be giving me a promotion.”

“Ooh!”

“And we might be having a little sex!”

“Rosalyn!”

The two of them laughed at her joke, went back to work. Rosalyn was already preoccupying herself with the idea of looking even older. After all, she thought, if younger men were easier to manipulate, looking older would widen that gap making it easier to manipulate more men, wouldn’t it? Wouldn’t it? She thought about it, but she knew it wouldn’t matter because it wouldn’t be long before she would have to see Dr. Gemwood again.* * *

Many more months had passed still. Dr. Gemwood lay back on her examination table, feeling the whipping of the tongue working on her below.

“OOh! Yes! Keep going Mixie! You little slut! Ahh that feels sooo good!” Dr. Gemwood yelled out in ecstasy, gripping the sides of the chair as she reached close to orgasm. Over the last few months Mixie went from being Rosalyn’s mom to her own perfect little sex slave. With the serum it didn’t take long at all for Mixie to become completely obsessed with serving the doctor, and the doctor grew to enjoy her little visits, so she decided to keep her around.

As she reached climax, she gripped Mixie’s hair, causing her to squeal a little as the doctor’s juices rubbed on Mixie’s face. Afterwards Mixie leaned back, exhausted but still horny, and after a moment of basking in the afterglow, Dr. Gemwood sat up and looked down at her, still on her knees, and completely naked.

Dr. Gemwood was extremely proud of the work she did with Mixie’s face. Anyone would have paid hundreds of thousands of dollars to have done what she did to her. The former 38 year old now wouldn’t be mistaken for anything over 19, with her cute button nose, round face, and enlarged eyes, which combined with her lusty expression made her look like a little teen slut. Her hair was now a number of colors, with it being primarily blonde, but with streaks of light blue and pink, and the bottom third of her hair fading into a deep red.

Mixie’s body on the other hand was another story. The doctor also fixated on making her look as young as possible, and so her figure was that of a prepubescent teen, albeit a somewhat tall one. Her hips were narrowed and her breasts were barely even an A-cup now, completely removing her bombshell figure. Her nipples were a pale pink color and even her vagina had plenty of work done, making it look just like new. Her face might have made her look 19, but her body made her look much younger. It might have been a problem if her tastes ran as young as she looked, but she only had eyes for the doctor now.

It wasn’t just her looks either; through Dr. Gemwood’s training she even acted like a cutesy little teenager, one with a strong fetishistic sex-streak anyway.

“Mistress! I’m like, super horny!!” Mixie pouted.

Dr. Gemwood decided to allow her to have some pleasure today. “Alright Mixie-slut. Come here and I’ll help you.”

Mixie got up excitedly and hopped over to Dr. Gemwood, lying down over her lap. Dr. Gemwood raised an arm and began spanking her.

“Ahn!”

“What do we say?”

“AHN! T-thank you mistress!”

“Again!”

“AHHN! Thank you mistress!”

This continued for a few more times, turning Mixie’s ass red. Dr. Gemwood could feel her leg getting wet as Mixie leaked onto her as well, and raised a final arm, swatting down hard.

“AAAAAHHHhhhhhhhhhnnnnnn!!”

It was more than Mixie could handle, and the orgasm caused her to roll off Dr. Gemwood’s lap and slump on the floor, writhing in the throes of pain and pleasure.

Afterwards, Dr. Gemwood glanced at her watch, “Alright now get dressed my little slut, your ride is going to be here soon.”

“Yay!” Mixie ran off to get dressed and cleaned up. Dr. Gemwood thought that Mixie made a much more entertaining receptionist, though she was near useless practically speaking. She only worked a few days a week however, today of which was one of those days, thankfully making a naked Mixie prancing through the hallways easier to deal with as they were the only ones around at the moment.

A short while later sounds could be heard from the front door.

“Mixie! Honey where are you? We’re running late!”

Dr. Gemwood walked up to the front to greet the visitor, “Hello, Mrs. Peren! Mixie is coming.”

“Please, call me Rosalyn,” she replied, stubbing out her cigarette as she stood outside the doorway, “no need to be formal when you’re dating Mixie.”

Dr. Gemwood hadn’t told Rosalyn that Mixie was actually her sex slave, but then again why bother? Contuing to make small talk, she picked up on her outfit, “Going somewhere this afternoon?”

Rosalyn looked at herself and then laughed, “No this is for work. Mixie and I work at the strip club, remember? We’re late for our gig. I was up a little late last night, so I apologize if I look a little worse for wear.” She leaned in close to Dr. Gemwood and whispered conspiratorially, “If you want to know though, I managed to bag me one who was barely 18! Youngest one yet! I know some people consider it an insult, but I’d say I’m doing a good job as a cougar don’t you?” She laughed a hoary laugh, “Not bad for 47 eh?”

Dr. Gemwood smiled, she knew the girl was actually 19, but after all the effort she had expended, no one would ever guess that again. Rosalyn was dressed in a skintight leopard-skin bodysuit with black spike heeled boots. The bodysuit clung to her body and showed off all the weight on her thighs and stomach she had accumulated over the past few months. Her arms fared no better, added fat causing her arms to droop a little, swaying as she moved her arms about, which were decorated in far too many bangles and bracelets, and ending in 2-inch long nails painted orange. Her breasts completed the deal of selling the image of her body as a 47 year old’s (one in very bad shape) as the nipple weights had done their job, leaving her breasts sagging far down her chest, as the leotard wrapped around them, but left an enormous amount of cleavage on display, definitely a sign of a desperate aging woman.

Her face fared no better, as her eyes were not only tired and dark from smoking, drinking and lack of sleep, but also through additional surgery. A facelift only served to actually make her look older, as the amount of plastic surgery she had gave her the look more of an old person trying to look younger. Her makeup was poorly done and overdone, even for the strip club, as she had on plenty of foundation, too much blush, bright red lipstick covering her enormous lips, and heavy sky blue eyeshadow across her entire eyelids. A nose ring and large hoop earrings completed the effect, and her platinum blonde hair was teased out as high and wide as it would go.

Dr. Gemwood found it funny that she was even older than herself, yet still had sex with people about Rosalyn’s real age. Then again, she thought, she herself is having sex with a woman who looks 16 but is actually 38, so who is she to talk? She laughed to herself at a job well done, no one fucks with this doctor, she thought, as Mixie came running, clutching her Hello Kitty backpack. She wore a white tubetop with a sequined heart that did everything to show she had no breasts, and she had fixed her makeup which mainly consisted of pink and glitter in various amounts.

“Hi mom! I’m totally ready!” She landed with a little hop step in front of Rosalyn, white 4-inch heeled Mary Janes clicking on the tiled floor and twin ponytails flittering about.

“We’re running late honey! Come, give your mommy a practice kiss.” Mixie leaned in and deep throat kissed Rosalyn. Dr. Gemwood had managed to convince the two that they were in opposite roles now, from mother and daughter, to sister and sister, and now finally to daughter and mother instead. But with a little something extra, the doctor grinned evilly.

As they kissed, Rosalyn ran a finger up her former-mother’s ass crack, lifting her new daughter’s pink pleated skirt and revealing a lack of panties underneath as Mixie moaned.

“Good job honey, they’ll love that at the strip club. Now say good bye to the doctor and we’ll get going.” Mixie kissed the doctor in a similar manner, as the doctor remembered that the two had a mother-daughter routine at the club that raked in the cash.

They waved good-bye and walked off, with Rosalyn keeping a firm hand on Mixie’s ass.

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inkmemes · 3 years

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ryan ross lyric sentence starters ↪ taken from various songs he’s written, lyrics he’s sung, & poetry he’s penned. trigger warnings for mentions of sex, cheating, drugs. alter as you see fit ♡

“so close …”

“i am composing a burlesque.”

“i'm all alone in an afterglow.”

“but we haven’t even met yet.”

“this war ain't gonna fix itself.”

“you can’t be lonely.”

“you're gonna have to dig your way out.”

“she was nowhere to be seen.”

“some people never change.”

“i know i broke your heart. mine is broken too.”

“i'm carving pumpkins.”

“i'm afraid that i may have faked it.”

“though you tried to cut me down it wasn’t deep enough.”

“this may call for a proper introduction.”

“i know it’s mad.”

“all the lights are on, but no one's home.”

“a year ago, i was dreaming of where i am now.”

“charm your way out.”

“we're all too small to talk to god.”

“you’re invited.”

“it's not so pleasant.”

“if you're going, then go.”

“i was suspicious and naive.”

“we're still so young, desperate for attention.”

“things have changed for me, and that's okay.”

“that's the spirit.”

“watch your mouth.”

“it started with a simple kiss.”

“don't you move.”

“what a wonderful caricature of intimacy.”

“we'll never go hungry.”

“praying for love in a lap dance and paying in naivety.”

“i lie in silence and feel like a fool.”

“grab your hat and fetch a camera.”

“your eyes are the size of the moon.”

“it's time for us to take a chance.”

“you should take this heart of mine.”

“how did i get here in the right from wrong?”

“i know it just doesn't feel like a night out.”

“it just made her more interesting.”

“she didn't even see me.”

“do you know what i mean?”

“i'm wrecking this evening already, and loving every minute of it.”

“i sure do make an easy target.”

“someone i love loves someone else.”

“don't bother waiting up.”

“don’t you go down.”

“you vanished when you'd gotten what you came here for.”

“would it be alright if we just sat and talked for a little while?”

"when did he get all confident?"

“you know it will always just be me.”

“i feel the same.”

“all my forgotten poems are a joke.”

“she'd wanna kiss you all the time.”

“i want a big celebration.”

“i'll ignore my heart and lie to the truth.”

“film the world before it happens.”

“that's just ridiculously odd.”

“it grows like fancy flowers.”

“he tried to save the calendar business.”

“i wonder if this was physical or if it could have been in my head.”

“i wouldn't be caught dead in this place.”

“you're pulling the trigger all wrong.”

“i saw you, i met you, i loved you.”

“so let me set you free.”

“i'm aware that you're scared of my heart, but it's here.”

“northern downpour sends its love.”

“you better put that pen to paper.”

“if you're gonna preach, for god sakes, preach with conviction.”

“haven't you heard that i'm the new cancer?”

“i know i broke your heart.”

“i am something velveteen.”

“we're locked inside.”

“just don't put your teeth on me.”

“when i’m good, i’m the baddest.”

“i’m up, looking for you now.”

“you can call me tonight.”

“it sure as hell ain't normal.”

“haven't you people ever heard of closing the goddamn door?!”

“we sure are in for a show tonight.”

“can't take the kid from the fight.”

“she's got me twisted in love.”

“i could've waited for the train to come.”

“you could love me if i knew how to lie.”

“if it were me, i'd write another song.”

“i fell from the heavens as a fetish.”

“i am renewed.”

“i hope that i've still got your help.”

“take a look at what you got me into.”

“we should feed our jewelry to the sea.”

“who could ask for any more?”

“i'm pouring out my heart for paper.”

“i need to leave you but i never will.”

“i forgot how to call you.”

“just stay where i can see you.”

“it's the greatest thing that's yet to have happened.”

“i’m doing my best.”

“she didn't choose this role.”

“life is not a fairytale.”

“our loneliness will keep us warm.”

“i don't mind taking a photograph.”

“you're gonna bend until it breaks.”

“maybe something in my blood could lift my spirits up.”

“i am out of my mind.”

“imagine knowing me.”

“i hope it's where i belong.”

“is it still me that makes you sweat?”

“your speech is slurred enough that you just might swallow your tongue.”

“i must be lucky to have you be the one who loves me.”

“but who could love me?”

“you clicked your heels and wished for me.”

“give me your attention.”

“you set the house on fire.”

"man, it feels good to feel this way."

“i've got more wit, a better kiss, a hotter touch, a better fuck then any boy you'll ever meet.”

“if the clouds were singing a song, i'd sing along. wouldn't you, too?”

“i know i've been wrong.”

“kissed a girl in the lobby ‘cause she asked so politely.”

“i can't get out by myself.”

“true love like ours is worth so much more than a diamond ring.”

“it never made her happy, 'cause she couldn't ever have me.”

“i do drunk dialing minus the alcohol.”

“i hope to god he was worth it.”

“he looked like he was barely hanging on.”

“why do i find myself outside at your window in the night?”

“i'd put a statue of myself upon the shelf.”

“they spill unfound from a pretty mouth.”

“ i'm going to need you to keep time.”

“you better back your shit up.”

“i think i owe it to you to try to be every hallucination you see in me.”

“you do this all the time."

“you're not what he's thinking of when he's with the other girl.”

things have changed for me.”

“this was no accident.”

“it's much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality.”

“just sit back and relax.”

“i, for one, won't stand for this.”

“we play by donner party rules at all times.”

“the glitter is gone.”

“boys will be boys.”

“you're all that's left for me.”

“my mind is all mixed up.”

“who knew that love was a dangerous drug?”

“'she couldn't ever have me.”

“isn't this exactly where you'd like me?”

“we can play normal for a few days.”

“i ground my teeth and you bite your tongue.”

“in case i lost my train of thought where was it that we last left off?”

“it seems i’m someone i've never met.”

“i think i made you up.”

“it never gave a damn about me.”

“perhaps, i was born with curiosity, the likes of those of old crows.”

“i'm cold, i'm hungry, but i'm bored.”

“i don't want no gifts.”

“the monster mash is playing.”

“do you really even live here?”

“this kind of thing always happens.”

“you were right. i was wrong, like i always am.”

“i missed your skin when you were east.”

“i feel as if i’m a figurine.”

“every night is the same.”

“ i'm sure i didn't ruin her.”

“i could have sworn we danced slow before.”

“i'm seated and sweating to a dance song on the club's pa.”

“it's nice to think that you are always wanted.”

“am i who you think about in bed?”

“you'll never know until you're there.”

“come on, this is screaming ‘photo op’.”

“you and i will always be ‘the dream’.”

“any practiced catholic would cross themselves upon entering.”

“it was a scream when we were young and dumb.”

“i know i should've never left.”

“who can i believe?”

“she always had her fangs at my jugular vein.”

“and a few more of your least favorite things.”

“in matters of opinion, love has gone insane.”

“if i go to hell will you come with me or just leave?”

“in the house of mirrors, ain't nothing keep you safe.”

“you know that you feel it too.”

“now we're making some progress.”

“god damn, i’d hate to see what i’d do under the influence.”

“i’m only reflecting your perfections.”

“just a first kiss to face the new year.”

“we’ll sit in silence.”

“you're a regular decorated emergency.”

“euphoria is a risk on the floor.”

“she could never win me.”

“love is all i'm really after.”

“have some composure,.”

“this was a therapeutic chain of events.”

“on the hotel floor, drinking warm champagne.”

“we need to talk.”

“every word gets you a step closer to hell.”

“let me help you please.”

“i never said i missed her when everybody kissed her.”

“now i know it's just a matter of time until i make her come.”

“if the world were ending, would you kiss me or just leave me?”

“forgive me if i’m not quite ready to give them to you.”

“i want to know what everyone knows.”

“you told me not to fear the dark.”

“the weather is impeccable.”

“i don't love you, i'm just passing the time.”

“i can't help but to hear an exchanging of words.”

“love is established philosophy.”

“but it might’ve been the calm that comes before the storm.”

“let's sing it like you mean it.”

“there's a devil in the corner.”

“there’s never anything good on tv.”

“everything goes according to plan.”

“i ran from love like it was laced.”

“i guess we're back to us.”

“we can't help ourselves.”

“i remember fuckin' in the falling rain.”

“i wasn't born to be a skeleton.”

“i couldn't quit her.”

“everything's gone missing.”

“we must reinvent love.”

“i know it's sad that i never gave a damn about the weather.”

“what do i know?”

"the best part about you was me."

“check the pocket of my leather jacket.”

“i am truly made of one million glowing constellations.”

“i mean, technically our marriage is saved.”

“she's a dangerous place.”

“even the truth is wrong sometimes.”

“was it god who chokes in these situations?”

“i feel like something on strings.”

“she couldn't ever catch me.”

“i try not to think about it and you.”

“i know it's just a matter of time.”

“i can't prove this makes any sense, but i sure hope that it does.”

“you know you should take it a day at a time.”

“i never said i’d leave the city.”

“it's the greatest thing you'd ever imagine.”

“i might have lost control.”

“i'm in a rut but still adored.”

“i'll keep my distance.”

“i need to take a vacation.”

“it's almost halloween.”

“is it a fairy tale?”

“well, this calls for a toast, so pour the champagne.”

“you can't stand it.”

“i'm exactly where you'd like me, you know.”

“we were always thick as thieves, you and me.”

“maybe i will, maybe i won’t.”

“all i want to do is dig a hole with you.”

“stop stalling.”

“it truly is enough to be alive and be in love.”

“i can't believe my eyes.”

“if i were to die tonight, would you cry, or deny my place in your life?”

“you are at the top of my lungs.”

“things do like to build up and fall apart at the same time for me.”

“why can't we just be friends?"

“i never know where the evening goes.”

“i want to go where everyone feels the same.”

“i fell in love again.”

“all i do is lie.”

“they asked for it.”

“was it all a dream?”

“all your wishes, they will sink like stones.”

“i wandered through the sunshine.”

��living even one minute without you is a moment i'd rather not have to live to see.”

“i want to go where everyone goes.”

“i think that i have had enough.”

“asked to be her husband; she already had one in prison.”

“true love is scarce.”

“somehow it still came undone.”

“things are shaping up to be pretty odd.”

“is ‘young’ a word for ‘dumb’; a word for ‘fun’?”

“said i'd let you keep it forever.”

“i never said i’d leave this town.”

“guess i'm going to a party.”

“damn, this is rough.”

“someone should have told her that pretty ain't a job.”

“something changed along the way.”

“i can't convince myself that you were good for more than cheap thrills.”

“now i’m the only one to blame.”

“let's not get selfish.”

“i hardly knew a thing about you.”

“give your feet a chance, they'll do all the thinking.”

“make a name for yourself.”

“it's useless searching in the cupboards.”

“i won't cut my beard and i won't change my hair.”

“it’s just the end of the world.”

“back to the room where it all began.”

“what was it that you put into my guts?”

“what a shame.”

“we'll leave the past out to pasture.”

“i know the world’s a broken bone, but melt your headaches, call it home.”

“everybody knows it but you.”

“it looks like the end of history as we know.”

#rp meme #rp prompt #rp starters #rp sentence meme #rp sentence starters #'ink ...' u say. 'i know' i say #if u know my newest rp blog and u see this ... simply Do Not Perceive Me #im having me time get OUT #let me live my LIFE

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dd122004dd · 3 years

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A Soulmate for Christmas

This is the first post of my soulmate series, with a total of 10 Ryan Clarke fics. So, if you wanna see any specific bonds between Ryan and Y/N, SEND THEM IN!

Ryan Clarke with the name of his soulmate on his wrist and Hope figures out who’s her soulmate and warns her away from him. Reader is a Heretic with a rebellious streak and so she goes to visit Clarke while he’s in their prisons.

Okay, I don’t know why this one ended up angsty but my fingers that’s where the story led. I’m sorry

Warnings: Character death, angst, lots of angst, mentions of the word ‘Hell’

Being a Siphoner was looked down by the witch community, being a Heretic was even more so. After walking the Earth for a little over a century I grew tired of looking for my soulmate.

Eventually, I decided to put down roots, but where does one go when they’re excluded from most supernatural communities? The Salvatore school of course!

Okay, to be fair it wasn’t as smooth sailing as that. When I’d arrived, looking for the Salvatores I came across Alaric, he’d been suspicious and downright hostile to me. Understandably so, his wife had been murdered by her Heretic brother and now here I was, another threat to his little family. But after a lot of...uh...we’ll call it bonding and totally not almost dying a few times we eventually established that I was not a threat to his family and I also taught his daughters what I’d learned over the centuries.

When the Salvatore school officially opened up to students, I had been offered a teaching position and I accepted. To be honest, I loved teaching the young witches, even though some of them held certain views against Heretics.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Hey Y/N!” Hope called out after me. That was unusual, to say the least. The young tribrid rarely, if ever crossed paths with me, much less spoke to me so if she was coming up to me, she must’ve had a damn good reason to.

“Hey...Uh I just wanted to tell you to not go into the dungeon. Okay? Because we’re holding another of Malivore’s monsters and I don’t want anyone to get hurt. Plus there’s a boundary spell around the bars to prevent him from escaping.”

“Uh-yeah. But, why are you telling me this?”

“No reason, just...he can be extremely manipulative and might make someone set him free so I’m going around warning the people strong enough to break the spell.”

Normally that would’ve been a good reason for me to believe her, except for the fact that her heart was beating slightly faster than normal. In fact the difference was so small that one wouldn’t have been able to notice it if they hadn’t been paying attention.

So, nodding I made my way to my next class, making up my mind to check out who or rather what was in the dungeon. After all, what’s life without a bit of risk?

Plus, when else am I ever going to get a chance to learn about seemingly mythological beings? Well....learning is more of a stretch, it’s more of almost dying but ya win, some ya lose some, eh?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I eventually made my way down to the dungeon, coming face to face with the monster I’d been warned away from.

He looked just like a human and if I didn’t know better, I’d have bet good money that he was nothing more than a mortal.

“Who are you?”

“I could ask you the same, little witch.”

“I asked you first.”

“Why should I tell you who I am? Names have power, don’t you know?”

“So does blood. Since you don’t want to tell me who you are, tell me what you are.”

He stared at me for a moment before responding, “Your worst nightmare.”

“Well, you’re welcome to my nightmares anytime. Plus, if you were my worst nightmare then wouldn’t you be caught in a dream catcher instead of in a simple prison charmed with a barrier spell?”

“You know your mythology.”

Playing games with this new monster was fun but my patience was running thin. I cast a truth spell on the monster before asking.

“What are you?”

“As if- I’m a Golem. A mud man. The creation on Malivore- wait why did I say tha- ugh not another truth spell! What is up with you witches and truth spells?”

Smirking, I replied, “Well, you shouldn’t have danced around the bush, then Mr-it’s-clobbering-time.”

“One, Golems are not people made of rocks with super strength and navy blue shorts. Second, since you know what I am, it’s only fair that I know your name in return, witch.”

“Y/N L/N, clobberin’ man.”

He froze in his cell, staring at me with wide eyes. I stared back at him in confusion. “I suppose your soul mark says ‘Ryan Clarke’, doesn’t it, Y/N L/N?”

I looked at him with wide eyes, “What have you done?”

“I haven’t done anything, little witch. I haven’t harmed your soulmate because harming him would bring me great pain.”

“Then....where is he?”

“You’re looking at him.”

Well....shit.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When I recovered from my surprise, Hope opened the door to the little prison. She looked between the two of us before sighing.

“I suppose you found out, huh?” she said, nonchalantly.

“You-You suppose I found out?!? Hope. what the HELL were you thinking? You tried to keep me away from my mate! You KNEW that I spent centuries, CENTURIES looking for him. The LEAST you could’ve done was tell me. Didn’t I deserve to know?!”

“Y/N it’s not-not what you think. He’s evil! He cares about nothing but himself. He even used Josie when he tried to transfer his consciousness to me! I couldn’t let him get to you too! I just didn’t want you to be hurt. I’m sorry.” Her voice got progressively lower as she spoke.

“What do you mean he used Josie?!?” I bellowed. Turning to him with fury coursing through my veins I asked, “What the HELL did you do to Josie?!? And you dare come here, into my home, and try and harm the students under my care?! Soulmate or not, that is unforgivable.”

Ryan tried defending himself but he found that he had no defense. His mate was right in her ire towards him.

“Well, there might be a way for you to make reparations. Okay, so one more of Malivore’s lovely creatures is up there spreading Christmas cheer. It appears that the three of us are the only ones unaffected. Probably because we’re miserable. So, Ryan, you need to help us find this creature.”

“Well, what would I get in return?”

“What do you want?”

“Well, apart from the forgiveness of my dear Y/N, I’ve never spent a single Christmas celebrating, so I want to spend one Christmas eating, singing and making merry before I die.”

Hope sighed before agreeing, but I was held up on one word ‘die’. What did he mean by that?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As Ryan gorged on Christmas food, cookies and cake, Hope squeezed as much information out of him as she could about the Krampus and I was squeezing information out of her about Ryan’s....condition. She eventually fessed up and told me everything, or at least a summarized version of everything.

To say I was shocked was an understatement, but I didn’t have time to dwell on anything as the reality of my situation sunk in. I wouldn’t have the life I’d dreamed of with my soulmate, in fact, I’d only have until the clock struck midnight, oh how nightmarish this Cinderella story was. Maybe he was onto something about being my worst nightmare.

After Ryan had had his fill, the party moved to a slower pace. Romantic Christmas music was put on and as the soft dulcet tones filled the air, I grabbed my soulmate, leading him to dance. Well, it was just us swaying with each other, but it felt perfect.

In that dance, we whispered to each other, learning about each other, trying to make the moment last forever, but alas the song ended and our bubble shattered.

Soon, someone handed us slips of paper to write down wishes on. I figured what’s the harm in it, so I write down,

‘I wish I had forever with my soulmate.’

(Time skip brought to you by Lizzie’s Luscious Locks)

After Krampus was defeated, Ryan made his way towards the mini Malivore pit well aware that his mate trailed after him.

“I know you’re there. Come out.”

I approached my mate, glancing at the large clock in the town. Only 20 minutes.

“Walk with me, please. I don’t think I can do this alone.”

I silently nodded, holding his hand as we walked to his demise. We talked for what felt like hours. We joked, we laughed and told each other our secrets. Soon, we reached the Malivore pit before either of us realized that it was time to go.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It’s funny, isn’t it? The very soulmate that I was waiting so long for, the one that I hoped against all hopes was real and that I wasn’t cursed to roam the world alone was a literal mud man/ticking time bomb filled with Hope Mikaelson’s blood.

The mate I’d hope to walk the Earth with was leaving me before we could even spend a whole day together. In all of my fantasies of how we’d meet I never could have anticipated this.

I knew that if my mate was a mortal I could simply change them into a vampire so that we’d never be separated, but no amount of vampire blood could stop our separation, and the sheer powerlessness I felt was enough to bring me to my knees.

It felt like a punishment. Like every thing my coven, the witches and the vampires said about me was right, that I was an abomination and I didn’t deserve a mate.

But as I stared into his beautiful brown eyes, eyes that I’d probably never see again, I knew that they were wrong.

He grasped by arms, pulling me closer and resting his forehead against mine. “I wish we had longer. I wish I’d have met you before, but I can’t say that I haven’t loved spending time with you. I was always curious of what you’d be like and now that I’ve met you I know that I am one lucky bastard to get you as my soulmate, even just for a night.”

At this point, slow tears trailed down both of our faces as our lips touched each other’s, our bodies melding into one, the way it was supposed to be all along.

“Don’t go.”

“I don’t want to, but if I don’t then once my father returns, he’ll come after you and everyone you care about. Even though it breaks my soul to leave you, I have to do this, not for anyone else, simply for you.”

“I’ll miss you.”

“I’ll miss you too, little witch.”

He walked a few paces before turning to look at his mate one last time, taking in her beauty, under the pale moonlight she looked like she was glowing, almost like a goddess.

“So this is what heroes feel like, huh? Never thought I’d be here, in this position, willing to sacrifice myself for someone, yet here we are. My only regret is that I didn’t find you sooner.

Ya know, you were the best thing to ever happen to me.

Perhaps in another lifetime, my soulmate.” He said before crumbling before my eyes.

The pain I felt at that moment broke me. It was as if my entire world collapsed under my feet. It felt like someone ripped my heart out, leaving me bleeding out on the floor.

The rest of the night was a blur but somehow, I made it back to my room before collapsing into bed and passing out from the intense pain I felt.

#Ryan Clarke #ryan clarke x reader #Legacies #angst #Ryan Clarke angst #soulmarks #soulmate #death #soulmate au #Ryan Clarke Soulmate #Ryan Clarke Soulmate AU

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tcm · 3 years

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Revisiting Oscar-Nominated and Winning Pictures By Susan King

We all have our favorite Oscar winners that we love to watch over and over again. But there are numerous Oscar winners and nominees that have gained new life thanks to TCM, HBO Max and DVD that are definitely worth revisiting. Here are some of my favorites:

RANDOM HARVEST

I interviewed the legendary funny man Carl Reiner a few months before his death and the conversation drifted to RANDOM HARVEST (’42) and how much he loved the romance. Robert Redford is also a fan. In the 1990s, he was planning on doing a remake, and in 2014, it was announced that Julian Fellowes (Downton Abbey) was hired to pen a remake. The handsome MGM production based on James Hilton’s bestseller starring Ronald Colman and Greer Garson was a huge hit that year and was nominated for seven Oscars including Best Film, Actor for Colman, Actress in a Supporting Role for Susan Peters and Director Mervyn LeRoy.

Both Colman and Garson had great success in other Hilton adaptations – Colman starred in LOST HORIZON (’37) and Garson made her U.S. film debut and earned her first Best Actress Oscar nomination in GOODBYE, MR. CHIPS (’39). RANDOM HARVEST is often overlooked by the other big MGM film released in 1942, William Wyler’s MRS. MINIVER. Not only was the stirring drama about a British family attempting to survive the years of World War II a blockbuster at the box office, but it also won a striking eight Oscars.

But I think RANDOM HARVEST is the more engaging film. It’s hard not to fall in love with this romantic tale with Colman at his most dreamy as a shell-shocked amnesiac veteran of World War I (Colman was wounded in the global conflict) named Smith who falls in love and marries a loving young entertainer (Garson). But Smithy, as Garson’s Paula calls him, is hit by a car on his way to a job interview and wakes up with no memory of the past three years but does remember who he really is – an aristocrat by the name of Charles Rainier.

Will true love reunite these two? The sigh level is very high with RANDOM HARVEST and this love story has a very strong place in my heart.

NONE BUT THE LONELY HEART

I’ve had more than a few people ask me why I like NONE BUT THE LONELY HEART (’44) so much. It’s depressing, they say. It’s downbeat, they say. But I think it’s a chance to see Cary Grant in a rare break out of his “Cary Grant” suave, sophisticated image. Adapted and directed by Clifford Odets from the novel by Richard Llewellyn (How Green Was My Valley), NONE BUT THE LONELY HEART casts Grant as Ernie Mott, a Cockney drifter who returns home to his Ma (Ethel Barrymore). When he learns that she’s dying of cancer, Ernie stays to help run her second-hand shop. But Ernie can’t stay out of trouble, joining forces with a gangster stealing cars and pursuing the mobster’s wife (June Duprez).

Meanwhile, his neighbor Aggie (Jane Wyatt) is madly in love with him and tries to save Ernie from a life of crime. The film was generally warmly received, earning four Oscar nominations and winning supporting actress for Barrymore. She shot her scenes during her two-week vacation from her Broadway triumph The Corn Is Green, and the Academy Award transformed the Broadway star into a much-in-demand film actress. She would go on to earn three more Oscar nominations.

Grant, who had earned his first Oscar nomination three years earlier for PENNY SERENADE (‘41), didn’t attend the Academy Awards where Bing Crosby won best actor for GOING MY WAY. Grant never earned another Oscar nomination, but received an Oscar honorary in 1970.

NIGHT MUST FALL

Handsome and charismatic Robert Montgomery was one of MGM’s top leading men in the 1930s, best known for his work in comedies including PRIVATE LIVES (’31) and FORSAKING ALL OTHERS (’34). Though he did an occasional dramatic part, nothing really stretched him as an actor until NIGHT MUST FALL (’37). Montgomery had long been bugging MGM head Louis B. Mayer for better roles. He supposedly allowed Montgomery to do NIGHT MUST FALL because the studio head thought the actor would be embarrassed when the movie failed. Montgomery later said, “they okayed me playing in it because they thought the fan reaction in such a role would humiliate me.” He went so far as to help subsidize the film’s production budget.

Based on the play by Emlyn Williams which ran on Broadway in 1936, NIGHT MUST FALL finds Montgomery playing Danny, a serial killer who just happens to have a trophy from his latest victim—her head—in a hatbox. Danny charms his way into the heart and home of a wealthy elderly woman (Dame May Whitty, reprising her London stage role). Rosalind Russell, who made five films with Montgomery, plays the elderly woman’s niece who has her suspicions about Danny but can’t convince her aunt that she’s in danger. Both Montgomery and Whitty earned Oscar nominations.

Though Montgomery returned to the comedy genre after NIGHT MUST FALL, he began directing films such as LADY IN THE LAKE (’46) and found great success in TV in the 1950s with the anthology series Robert Montgomery Presents, which often featured his daughter Elizabeth.

THE NAKED SPUR

Jimmy Stewart’s image took a 180 degree turn in the 1950s thanks to Alfred Hitchcock with REAR WINDOW (’54) and VERTIGO (’58), but most notably in the five Westerns he made with Anthony Mann. Far from the boy-next-door character he played pre-World War II, Stewart was transformed into conflicted, troubled men – anti-heroes who often could be as villainous as the bad guys who peppered these sagebrush sagas. (Mann also directed Stewart in three non-Westerns).

THE NAKED SPUR (’53), which earned a screenplay Oscar nomination for Sam Rolfe and Harold Jack Bloom, is my favorite of their collaborations. Stewart really digs deep into the character of Civil War veteran turned bounty hunter, Howard Kemp. He’s angry and bitter having lost his land during his conflict. Kemp hopes he can get his land back by working as a bounty hunter. And he’s doggedly determined to get outlaw Ben Vandergroat (a fabulously vile Robert Ryan). Along the way, he encounters two men (Millard Mitchell and Ralph Meeker) who join him on his journey. And when he finds Vandergroat, he also discovers he has a young woman (Janet Leigh) with him. Intelligent, often disturbing and brilliantly acted, THE NAKED SPUR is an exceptional exploration of the dark side of humanity.

#Oscars #Academy Awards #nominations #westerns #crime #drama #old Hollywood #classic #Jimmy Stewart #robert montgomery #Cary Grant #ronald colman #greer garson #TCM #Turner Classic Movies #Susan King

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popculturebuffet · 4 years

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Scotrospective: Scott Pilgrim Vs the World (The Comic)

Hello, Hello, Hello scottaholics! And what a beautiful day it is: After decades lost in the lost woods, at least it had that catchy tune to keep it company, Scott Pilgrim Vs the World: The Game is FINALLY back and performing for you on all platforms!

Even Stadia, the platform most likely to disappear like this game did for a while! Cheap shots at the stadia aside as a huge fan of the franchise as a whole and of this game who played it back on the 360, and had since sold said 360 so I had no way to get it back or ever play the dlc packs. Seriously who didn’t want to play wallace but never got to? Everyone, everyone is the answer. But with those the entirety of what I consider to be the main cast is playable, it has online so you can beat up hipsters, guys in costumes and robots with your friends, it’s a good damn feeling. And since i’m in a celebratory mood, naturally i’m also feeling like a review. And since it just so happens the next volume up in my look at the comics is Vs the World, seriously I planned this review for this month without thinking to have it come out on the same day as the game until a week or two in, I felt there was no better way to celebrate the biggest day for Scott Pilgrim fans in some time.. and for Brian Lee O Malley as he’ll stop getting twitter asks about it. So with all the exposition taken care of LAST TIME, and the link right there if your curious, we can jump right in. On with the show!

After our opening titles, and yes this comic has opening titles, with Ramona sitting solmely in the rain.

And Scott caught in the title. The rain shot is real pretty by the way. But yeah once we get past those we’re taken back 7 years ago. Finn found out his father was an asshole, and voiced by Stephen Root so hey you take the good with the bad, Steven just learned the horrifying truth about Gem Monsters, Guardians of the Galaxy saved the MCU and I was trying to find work after college.. wait... sorry sorry that was 7 years ago from THIS year. The comic came out in 2005, though the comic takes place on a sliding timescale where only like 2 years pass so I dunno when this is. Let’s just say 98. Okay so 1998: Bill Cllinton’s sex scandal breaks, and puts way too much of hte blame on the young intern whose life came to be defined by one stupid mistake she made with a man who was way older and should’ve known better, the tide of the Monday Night War turned in favor of the WWF as Stone Cold Steve Austin became a household name, and it was an utterly standup year for video game relaases with Ocarina of Time, Banjo-Kazooie, Crash Bandicoot: Warped, StarCraft, Castlevania: Symphony of the Night, WWF: War Zone, Pokemon Stadium, Spyro The Dragon, Pokemon Yellow, WarioLand 2, Oddworld: Abe’s Exodus, Star Wars: Rogue Squadron, Pokemon: Trading Card Game and Sonic Adventure. It’s like someone took a good chunk of my childhood and squeezed it into one year holy shit, I did not expect this when looking up what came out in 98.

And while the movie pool wasn't’ quite this amazing, we still had The Wedding Singer, The Big Lebowski, the dude abides, Batman and Mr Freeze: SubZero, The Truman Show, Mulan, the good one not the one made near concetration camps that makes her into a demigod, Saving Private Ryan, Blade, Simon Birch, Scooby Doo on Zombie Island, Rushmore, Bride of Chucky, HalloweenTown, Plesantville, and the Prince of Egypt. And in music Weird Al changed from his first signature look to his second, getting Lasik and growing out his hair. Seirously had no idea that was this year. Good to know. Also Elton John got his knighthood. Super shooters. I could go on with 1998 triva for days but I cannot go on for 8 weeks so let’s get to the point here.. during alllla this Scott Pilgrim, age 16, was starting St. John’s Catholic School and a couple of guys who were up to no good started making trouble. . by threatning to beat him up for no real reason. A fight insues and we cut to the principal’s office as Scott’s still a minor and not allowed to get into death fights just yet under the people’s freedom of choices and voices act.

It’s here he meets Lisa Miler, a peppy and sarcastic blonde, who’s intrigued by the fact Scott somehow got beat up after being here just 15 minutes and wants to be friends. Naturally for scott next we see him he’s busy playing video games, and annoyed someone else is around and wondering who this person whose now in his basement is. God no wonder teenage me related to him. So for the next few pages we see their friendship in time lapse: Lisa joins him at lunch, then geninely wonders since Scott’s Untentionally a dick if he hates her.. it’s part of why I think Scott has some form of autisim. And not just because I tend to belivie a character is on the spectrum all the damn time, it’s because of the way he acts: while he is nice and charming at times.. he also clearly has trouble relating to people or realizing how his actions effect them and as seen here in a younger form can often be compeltely distanced from normal social queues, not getting how his actions might be seen until Lisa outright talks to him about it. I mean.. it’s not a huge stretch, and it dosen’t mean he’s nto responsible for his own actions, but it does EXPLAIN a lot of them better: why he just sorta forgets about Knives post-ramona but at the same time still cares enough he dosen’t want to hurt her despite you know, that ship sailing just by having moved on.

But now the two are friends and his parents, who we meet for the first time and sister inquire about her being his girlfirned.. and by next jumpcut his parents apparently don’t want him hanging out with girls? What exactly the fuck? Also they mention Laurence, Scott’s brother whose missing for most of the books and has no real payoff for not being around. Next cut we get KIM!

Thank you Prissy. And she’s.. not all that different, assuming, correctly that their partner project, how she meets scott will just result in her doing all the work.. which not only is how these things usually went when I was in high school a decade later, but reminds me of the time me and my friends curtis and justin were put on a project and when asked who the alied powers were, guessed “Germany?”.... you can understand my fear. And also Curtis punching him for getting nothing done.. and not hard or brutally mind you just once quick in the gut and with full warning. Ah... the adaquate old days.

So back to Lisa as, since Scott’s Mom has a guitar.. a fact I.. never honestly thought about. Seriously I never realized her children, since the Bass Scott has for most of the books is Laurence’s, getting into music was probably due to her. Also Lisa makes her case for WHY be a band: the school has a regular event called Lunchapalooza, where everyone goes to and since by teen logic, just being in a band is automiacally cool, she figures they can jump from not QUITE being in any cliques to being super cool. Which honestly yeah... while I didn’t know any bands in high school, the fact one of my friends, ironically named Scott, was a DJ automatically made him pretty damn cool once he got past his awkard phase. I never got past mine but somehow was loved by all except that one douchey kid in our group who mocked me for naming my Luxray kim, assuming it was based on Kim possible and not Kim Pine... though frankly how that’s an insult when Kim Possible was a fucking awesome show and character is beyond me but he was just 17 and also a douchebag, it didn’t have to make since it just had to piss off the easily pissed off kid with aspergers. So Scott poses how they can be a band with just their guitars and Lisa concedes drums WOULD help.. I mean it’s what MADE Shallow Gravy.

So while Kim wonders if Scott is dating Lisa, because teenagers don’t really get girls and boys can be friends without wanting to be together, though not often as teenage boy brains can be rather stupid and horny... can confrim from personal experince. So it becomes clear Scott has a thing for Kim, and when Scott tries broaching it with Lisa she dosen’t take it well and he backpedals to asking her to be her drummer and plans to monday, proving Scott has somehow not gotten better at reading women, or anyone after 7 years. Can relate.

So yeah he decides to ask Monday, same day as their presentation.. and thankfully missed the bus as he arrives to find the Benvy Tech boys came in, took everyone out and abducted Kim. Because yeah, just in case you were wondering Scott’s life was always like this.. or was it? Questions for later. So one Canadian Version of River City Ransom later, Scott’s made his way to simon... who, since most of you have probably seen the movie or art of the movie.. looks an AWFUL lot like Gideon. Hrmmm. Simon is naturally the final boss here and wonders if this is the best St. Joels can muster. Scott quips back as only Scott can.

So cue an unsuprisingly awesome actoin sequence. IT’s part of why I love these color editions: While they already LOOKED thoroughly fantastic the added colors really help the series shonen manga meets old school video game vibe REALLY fucking pop. So Simon pleads mercy which like Scott delivering a good quip.. should’ve really been a red flag to younger me and is foreshadowing for later in case I was too subtle. He then does what any noble hero would do.. kicks simon into the sunset, tells Kim how he feels and asks her to play drums. They then make out. Awwww.

Lisa suprisingly takes it well as the next montage shows.. granted we’ll learn in Feburary she wasn’t QUITE as over scott as it seemed, but the three, along with a friend of Lisa’s whose name I forgot and who DOSEN’T come back so I’m not going to bother learning, form their own friend group, Scott and Kim get an A, and Scott, Kim and Lisa’s band is dubbed sonic and knuckles, which is an objectively awesome band name. Something the series really does great: Video Game Based Band Names. Crash and the Boys, Sex Bomb-Omb, Clash at the Demonhead... we need more bands like this in the real world dammit. So then they play their big game, the two loose their vrigniity.. and then Kim asks scott “your moving to tornoto?” And.. for now.. that’s that.

While the framing of that will be VERY important in the last volume, as notice how KIM’S the one who brings it up and it’s not explicitly stated scott actually told her, this flasback is great. While it does contribute to the volume’s drifty pacing, more on that as we go, it brilliantly sets up a LOT of stuff for later, paticuarlly Lisa who I assumed wouldn’t be back and younger me’s jaw fucking DROPPED when she popped up in Volume 4. Granted i’m spoiling that suprise for you now but odds are most of you reading this have either alreaddy read these or were probably wondering if the girl from the animated short ever had any actual relevance in the books. So yes, yes she does. She’s also the pink haired girl you see pop up in the game in the background, as a nod to O’Malley’s comic strip style which had her and Kim as the leads. Also yeah for fans of the game or movie or even the comics who were unaware.. this prologue got an animated adaption on adult swim to promote the movie. Naturally Micheal Cera and Allison Pill reprised their roles as Scott and Kim, with Mae Whitman voicing lisa.. and honestly being perfect for the roll, and Jason Schrwartzman voicing Simon naturally. While the animation is slightly limited, it still looks decent and expertly translates O’Malley’s art, while sliming things down slightly where needed to fit a short, and the anmation takes a huge bump for the fight scene which like the comic is short but awesome. While it has no real bearing on the film as Kim’s former relationship with Scott never really comes up or has any impact, as the Film while good was based primarily on volumes 1-3 with small pieces of 4 (paticuarlly the iconic “Lesbians gag”), with Wright working off outlines and drafts of 5 and 6, so the last half hour or so is mostly Wright’s invention.

Not a bad thing as it’s still awesome and not o’malley’s fault but it means kim dosen’t get to do much, and is a big reason why I want an adaptation on netflix or hbo max. While i’d still want changes both because there’s no sense doing an adaptation if your not going to make some tweaks of your own and because it’d be intresting to update the series to modern day, both in societal conventions and so everyone stops saying the r word. Seirously the most telling sign of the series age is that word showing up quite a bit during the first half of the series. Point is there is merit in doing another remix of the story and doing a longer form one so we can get more of the characters, as well as flesh out ones like Steven, Neil (Who was done WAY better in the movie adaptation thanks to the wonderful Johnny Simmons), and Stacey who got the shaft in the books. Again, not slagging off the movie, it’s really great. Just saying there’s always room for more Scott Pilgrim content and we all know it.

We’ll get back to the comic proper, and the present day of 2005, after the cut.

So the story proper opens with Scott dreaming of playing video games... because of course he is with Ramona walking in. and finding it charmingly pathetic but wanting her boyfriend to you know, get out of bed. It’s 11:30. So with Scott’s ass out of bed, we find Scott, Age 23 idiot with a heart of gold and Wallace, 25 king of all gays, on the bus as they talk it getting warmer and Lucas Lee, movie star and jason lee stand in coming to town to film a movie.. and Scott being Scott gets him confused for Luke WIlson. He’s also seen Bottle Rocket which.. good on him. Seriously while not wes anderson’s best film, those were made long afte this comic was published, it’s still a damn good one.. where was his career at this point... looking it up life aquatic was his most recent films and is still one of my favorites. So yeah he was in a good place career wise.

Scott proudly talks about having Ramona over in a couple days so she can see his place and meet Wallace. But as explained by Wallace for those of us just tuning in, he already met her last volume. You know during that time Stacey thought she could magically make her date not be attracted to someone else.. and yes even almost a month later not letting that one go. Stacey should know better. Not saying i’ts right Wallace keeps poaching her boyfriends, but she still shoudlnt’ try and force a relationship with a guy or even finish a date with one who makes out with someone else, regardless of gender, mid date. She deserves better. In general not just in this one scenario but we’ll get to that.

Point is while Scott, as usual, is a bit pissy about this Wallace.. has no time for that and issues an ultimatium

And he’s not bluffing, as he fully intends to tell Ramona the minute she walks in the door if he dosen’t break up with Knives. It really shows Wallace off at his best and why he’s Scott’s closest friend: Kim and Stephen do care about him but Kim both has a LOT of unresolved issues and sexual tension with him and keeps eveyrbody including Scott at arm’s length. And Stephen.. while he will OCASIONALLY call Scott out mostly just enables him, either ignoring his college buddy’s shittier behavior or playing along with it and backing him up when Kim rightfully calls him on being a dickhead. While both love their friend they just aren’t the best at dealing with his shit or getting why he does the things he does good and bad. Wallace on the other hand geninely likes Scott. He’ll lock him out of the house and tell him to sleep elsewhere so he can bang one out, he’ll not wear pants if he dosen’t have to and he’ll certainly hit on Scott just to get a rise out of him, phrasing.. but he also genuinely cares for the guy’s well being. He lets him sleep in their house basically rent free since scott has no money, buys most of their stuff, and is, as we’ll see in this one, the ONLY one of his friends to take an active part in the fight against the exes, training Scott and researching his opponents when he can get info. He won’t baby Scott as seen here, but he will help him, and he will be the harsh voice of reason his friend needs. And he did TRY doing a softer approach last time, simply telling scott to break up with his fake high school girlfriend. Scott had every chance to dump Knives during the last third of the first book.. it’s just a combination of both Knives and Ramona being in the same place and Scott getting panicky meant he balked. He NEEDS to be pushed into leaving Knives or he’s not gonna. And he also gets it’s not just Scott being a shifty coward: Scott DOES like Knives.. he just found someone who actually challenges him, intrests him and connects with him on his level, versus someone who worships and adores him like a puppy who just happens to be skilled with knives. The relationship with Knives. was an ego boost, an unequal paring that gave Scott the illusion of moving on from Envy. Ramona is him ACTUALLY moving on and given how badly Envy fucked him up, which comes into play in this book and the next, Wallace recognizes that Scott does need her... but this relationship can’t go anywhere if Scott is seeing someone else, and they both know it. Wallace is just the one who’s willing to do something about it to force scott to do something about it. He’s doing this for Knives too: it’s very clear he cares about the girl, was against this from the start, and knew this was going to end in pain and the faster Scott rips off the Band-Aid the faster she can move on to someone closer to her age and far more equal to her. Scott.. takes this about how you’d expect, even calling Double Standard, as Wallace does sleep around.. and while Wallace will be a homewrecker to Stacey.. otherwise it’s not remotley the same. Wallace does his sleeping around either casually or when he does get a partner, with their consent from what we can tell. He never cheats or anything, he just likes to bone. So yeah Scott doesn’t have a leg to stand on and acts accordingly.

One of my faviorite gags in the series and one that’s etched in my head for keeps. So with a justified Ultimatium over his head Scott calls knives to hang out. Knives.. shows off that as adorable and trusting as she is.. she’s also kind of creepy and shows up just outside the phone booth he’s calling her from. So the two go to a record store and Knives tries to get Scott into Clash at the Demonhead, her faviorite band. But since i’ts you know, headlined by Scott’s ex as we’ll find out, he’s not into it. But before that can get awkward.. it gets awkward in another way as Knives invites Scott to dinner at her parents place. Which is an objectively bad idea even before you get into the fact Scott wants a way out and as Volume 4 will show us her dad is both not happy with the idea of her dating a white guy and willing to use a katana to prevent it so he dodged a bullet there. Scott TRIES weasling out of it, but his “I’m too old for you” thing falsls on deaf ears.. and actually explains why she thinks this is normal: her parents are 9 years apart. of course obviously two consenting adults with a decade between them is a mite bit diffrent than 5 years between a teenager whose taking this way too seriously and a grown man whose taking this not seroiusly at all and dosen’t get how effed up this is. But Knives is too naive to get that, and papers over any possible concerns about her parents not wanting her to date a white guy with i’m in love. Seeing that he has no EASY way out of this, as he shouldn’t, Scott just rips off the band aid and bluntly breaks up with her, saying it’s not going to work out. Knives.. is clealry devistatd. To her this was a serious relationship.. and Scott realized that too late.. and thankfully while he didn’t break up with her in the best way, at all, simply syaing i’ts not going to work out and confirming to her he means it, it’s clear from his face this hurts to do and he knows he’s REALLY hurting her and REALLY shoudlnt’ of dated her to begin with. IT’s why Scott dating a teenager dosen’t make him a morally rephrenisvie monster: because he was genuinely intrested, didn’t use her sexually, and there are tangible consequences for his actions. Knives just dosen’t disappear neatly into the sunset so he can be with ramona. The rest of the series covers her emotoinal recovery from being with Scott, and how she very horribly handles it and that’s why this plotline works at all: she’s not some act one contrivance to be thrown away, sh’es a human being, and more than that a young woman who got hurt REALLY bad and got way too in over her head with someone who just..wasn’t the one fo rher no matter how much she can’t admit that.

We also get one of my faviorite sets of pages as Scott relfects on things and the sheer devistation on Knives face, which credit to a series that even at this early point loves it’s big bold facial expressions.. her’s being more subded just makes it sting MORE.

This bit to me is vital to keeping Scott sympathetic and to his character. We see he really does regret what happened, dosen’t know how to process it and genuinely feels awful. As I said instead of some exgerated face that would still hurt him.. her face is quiet, clearly unable to process this and clealry lost and hurt.. and that hurts more than any fuck your or sobs he was probably expecting. Just her clearly not getting WHY he’s doing this or why he hurt her, and he KNOWS why he just knows telling her the truth would hurt her even more. But.. as he thinks.. his thoughts move to something else.. and the WHY of why he did this.

He did it for Ramona. Wallace was as harsh as he was right: he needed a clean slate to actually give this relationship a shot and the smile comes off less as him being a calous dick whose just happy to move on, I mean he is a little, but more jus tsomeone READY to finally move on. He found the right person, he let the wrong one go if clumsily.. he has a future to look forward to and he can smile about that.

Granted he’s still his usual unteitonally callous self and his way of telling his friends he and knives broke up is to casually say so and say “dont’ worry you’ll meet my new girlfriend soon.” Their reaction.. is my own.

Look just because Scott is a nuanced douchebag dosne’t stop him from being a Douchebag. It just means he isn’t intolerable to watch and you actually care about him growing as a human being is all.

So with that out of the way, it’s date night and Ramona is coming over.. also Scott is considering calling her Ramy which no. I'm genuinely in favor of a pet name that’s just a variant on someone’s name but a bit cute, as it’s just the right level of obnoxious, but no, just no Scott. No. Ramona enters, meets Wallace again and sits down while Scott tries to shoo him out.. because turnabout is fair play bitch. They also see Ramona’s new hair as she dyes it something new for the first time, in this case a very lovely two tone, the purple from last volume but with a darker purple bellow it. I honestly wish she went for multiple colors in her hair again, but likely didn’t since the book was originally in black and white... which still dosent’ make sense as it would’ve been EASIER that way. Regardless Wallace makes himself scarce proving that he’s more than willing to be equal in terms of one of them spending the ngiht elsewhere. What a guy.

Ramona finds out a few things about Scott: That his apartment is VERY small, just one room with a bed, a cabinet, a small kitchen and a bathroom, which despite what scott says I REALLY dont’ count as another room. Just common sense. She also learns that he can COOK. Yeah while you’d expect Scott to just get a wad of “I did the ultimatum thing okay now gimme” money and buy dinner but no.. he made the whole thing himself from his own recipe. And once we cut to them eating on the floor.. turns out yeah he not only can cook but is REALLY good at it. She wishes there was a table which, small as the place is.. fair point. I mean at least get some tv trays. You have chairs. Or at least the easy chair. You can get nice padded folding chairs so you have a second chair guys. I know your poor but come on. Also Scott leanrs bread makes you fat. Good stuff. Also Scott freaks out when , while making out with Ramona in bed later, she mentions his hair’s getting kinda long and could use a cut... which turns out to be a thing for him. He isn’t an ass about it he just panics a bit because he’s partially convinced his last relationship’s nightmarish breakup was because of a bad haircut he got. As we’ll see next week, that’s a no but as someone whose a touch neroutic myself I get blaming a larger issue on something trivial.

So we then get to the next chapter where it’s KIM’S turn to have a dream.. and the only time we see someone else's dreams. Honestly.. I really would’ve liked if it was a recurring device, even have Ramona pop into other people’s Not used ALL the time but I could easily see it being used with Knives to convey her obsession with Scott and her pain or kim again to help move her plots along or Wallace because I want to know what’s going on in his head. It must be a maze of male gentalia and fine liquor the likes of which has never been seen. It’s scotts funeral as Simon killed him and Scott’s corpse wonders if she dreams about this a lot.

So we see her get ready and wake up her roomate Sarah whose a bitch. And as we’ll see in one of the backups, so’s the rest of her roommates. So drifting into work. Hollie is a character I really liked... the past tense will be explained later. And the first scene is probably why as her and Kim banter effortlessly, with Kim suggesting maybe she was a happy kid... only to admit quickly no she wasn’t, she was pretty withdrawn and then pretty angsty over someasshole who will be named Scott. “Your a holy terror kim, and i’m glad your on your side”> It’s a short scene but the kind this series excells at: just realistic, fun little exchanges bursting with character. I also GENUINELY wish we got more of this kind of thing, as only Knives really gets these kind of scenes to herself for the most part. There ARE scenes without Scott, but not enough like this that just give us as look into what his friends lives are like during the moments they aren’t putting up with his dumbassery or watching him engage in mortal combat. It’s why i’ve been hoping a spinoff will happen even though it likely won’t SOON. I’m sure O’Malley will return to this world some day, but between Snotgirl and Wicked World, which will come out when it’s ready but should be good.. he’s just really busy. But i’d love to see more of Kim.. or Wallace or Knives. The latter two are a no brainer: Knives is the tritagonist of the books, and it’d be intresting to see what she’d be like 5 years at the book, at the same age and stage in life as Scott. And with Wallace it’s because we really DON’T see his friend circle, life or what goes on with him. We hear him talk about a new boyfriend, who we don’t meet until near the end of the series, though you can see him in stage 3 of hte game if your curious, we see him with some random friends in volume 4, but we really don’t KNOW what hyjinks and lojinks wallace gets up to. He’s pretty isoalted from the rest of the main cast, something I hope an adaptation could fix as while realistic i’td be curious to see what his relationship with Kim or Steven would be like. Just food for thought.

Point is this was a good scene. But as is typical for Kim’s life just when she has some serenity her ex crashes back in. In this case Scott needs to rent some movies, kim works at a rental store and god teenage me really wanted a clerks style spinoff.. but enough spinoff talk. Scott asks kim to bororw them, of course and explains he’s training for his fight with Lucas.. which Kim reacts to finding out her second best friend is in a series of death matches.

She has understandable questions such as how the hell doe she know that and is he stalking Lucas and just hoping he’s an ex.. which let’s face it would be a very scott move. But nope Wallace told him, likely learning in an interview he dated Ramona or is coming for scott because he knows everything. We also get one of my faviorite exchanges when Kim wonders why Wallace and Scott are roomates.. a valid question he deflects by saying i’ts a long story.

Also yeah, as much as casting Micheal Cera backfired for the movie.. that panel there proves there wasn’t another choice at the time. When you want a loveable, somewhat douchey, but also somewhat innocent and oblivious slacker.. who you gonna call. Also before we move on.. Kim.. how are you this suprised. You were there for the fight with Matthew. And Ramona giving out the exposition on why he’s there.. and you even did that whole weird space channel 5 thing no one ever did agian and to this day I will never understand what O’Malley was going for and only know the refrence by hearing that’s what it was. Point is you shouldn’t be this suprised. Anyways we next cut to Ramona and Stacey, as Ramona enters her workplace, second cup, and they talk and Scott’s spider sense goes off...

I mean it’s just a bad feeling but still.. weird. WE’ll get back to that later. Scott is in the middle of his training.. and I love the mentor side of Wallace and feel it didn’t get used enough as the series went on. As said before he cares about Scott, so he serves as his Shounen Mentor and a great one: he’s stern and makes Scott work, but he also gets his student and what Scott needs to work. I just wish he’d taught Scott some actual combat, but as we see Wallace’s combat skills boil down to yelling useless info from the sidelines.. I mean he can be useful, we’ll see that next week, it’s just he’s not an action guy. But spirtually he’s the guy scott needs to kick his ass into shape. That being said his “training” consists of watching Lucas’ movies, playing tony hawk and when Scott wants to play more Tony Hawk, having Scott do pushups while Wallace plays Tony Hawk. Before we turn... there is an elephant in the room I just gotta shoo out: Lucas.. is easily the worst setup of the 6 exes. Patel SEEMINGLY comes out of nowhere but his letter and email hint SOMETHING is coming up, and his flashy dynamic entry intro is damn cool and is what turns the series on it’s head, from an indie comic about a guy getting it together.. to that but with huge shonen dustups with epic visuals. Todd is introduced masterfully here, and is a presence from the start of volume 3 as a result, Roxie gets a slight tease in the free comic book day issue, and her not attacking for two months not only sets up tension but allowed for a red herring.. im’ not only hiding that the fourth ex is a she because anyone whose seen the movie or played the game knows the fourth ex is a woman. The cat’s out of the bag, no sense hiding it. The Kentangis show up pretty early on and Gideon is hinted at and built up, as this towering, mysterious figure, his relationship with Ramona, who he is, why he set up the league, and just how fucking strong he is is all obscured, with his only four apperances simply teasing the big final showdown and giving him that much more mysitque.

Lucas.. is just sorta intorduced like “Hey I gotta fight this guy”. There’s just.. nothing. Scott’s just gotta fight him because he’s next up and Wallace knows that because plot convience. It’s VERY lackluster given what comes before.. and frankly while I like Lucas, he’s the weakest plot and character wise. HE’s not even really EVIL, just a sellout and is more doing this because he has to I guess, and likely because of stuff we find out in Book 6 but sssssshhhhh. We’ll get more into that when the fight happens but it’s one of the books weakest points. The evil ex.. just feels like an afterthrought again despite there being no reason to. Thankfully this would never happen again as I said, but it dosen’t make this any less frustrating.

So we cut to Sex Bomb-Omb practice, and after that we get more tease for Clash at Demonhead. And Stephen.. is cool with them and entirely happy one of them made it, while Scott is understandably pisssed off about it and not happy one of his best friends is you know, promoting the band of his ex who broke his heart and as we’ll get more into next time, said rising career is what tore them apart. So yeah Stephen’s a dickhead, and I was wrong last time that he got better. He really.. dosen’t. He gets less CREEPY.. but out of the main 6 characters he’s the weakest: he dosen’t have much of an arc, does some very questionable shit in the second half, and his being around means we have to suffer through Julie. I’ll tear into him more on a case by case basis but for once Scott’s not overreacting. While Kim does nothing she also has no idea just HOW bad things were and Scott won’t tell her. Stephen was there the whole fucking time. He just saw Scott’s rebound with a teenager. He knows he was kind of messed up after this. Dosen’t justfiy knives but still he looses the moral high ground he tries to have at times.

So while Scott shops a song for Ramona to her, Knives calls Scott’s place clearly setting up another suprise apperance. Wallace.. figures out what sh’es doing quick and simply gives her a stern “You have to go” And to me it’s not him being a dick.. he’s both trying to save her from seeing Scott with Ramona and fucking her up worse... and is looking out for her. She needs to move on and moving up to stalking Scott’s not going to help that. Scott dosen’t WANT her anymore, and while he handled it bad, Wallace gets she needs to see that. Granted he could’ve you know explained it to her and tried talking, but as i’ve said he’s not a perfect person and he was also on a time table to get her out of there in case Scott you know, showed up with his new girlfriend and made things a billion times worse. And the two are indeed headed to his place to watch one of Lucas’ movies, and part of that weak setup is that Ramona.. just has no connection with him. It was high school. Scott also pretends he dosent’ remember his. You are a lying liar sir stop that. So they watch the film together hanging out, and it’s.. really bad. The good one was rented out. I miss rental stores.. a magical time. I mean i’ts better now, streaming means 80% of movies are avaliable if you have a bunch of services and even if you just have netflix or hulu or hbo max, you still get a pretty decent selection each month. Plus digital rentals are super easy. Do miss redbox though. I mean it’s still there I’m just warry of something that relies so heavily on touching things in a state with a lot of trump morons. You CAN get Covid twice and I don’t wanna. Also we get some dated Dialouge as Scott commenting on Lucas being hot, he is good taste Scott, is given a “good job convincing me your not gay”. He and ramona end up having sex though so .. yay? I dunno. The series has a really weird thing about not getting bisexuals exist and as someone whose bi, and really against bi errasure it bothers me, it bothers me a lot. Though given O’Malley apparently has not only far more queer rep in snotgirl but a bisexual lead, he’s clearly learned so i’m not going to drag him too hard on this. It was the early 2000′s. People were pretty damn stupid about this. Creators have gottten MUCH more important issues much worse.

So the next morning, Scott gets a call from his well meaning but ditzy mom, and reacts like you’d expect. His parents are in Europe to keep them out of the action and what not. Though apparently according to the last book his mom did read volume 3 at least. Or Wallace told her about the relevant bit. You make the call.

So i’ts Ramona’s turn to meet Sex Bomb-Omb. The group hang out and discuss Gordon Downie.

Look I don’t know indie bands. I have no idea who the tragically hip are I just know the name is really hipstery. We also get the recipe for Vegan Shepards Pie. None of them are vegan they just wanted to try it and I.. really want to make this some time. Just to see if it’s any good. But yeah it’s in general a fun casual scene, as Kim reveals she and Scott dated, just to break the tension, and Scott tries out Rammy but quickly backpedals. Just fun slice of life stuff. Oh and Knives is watching them from the window and takes Scott dating someone else as well as you’d expect.

So she gets some hair bleach to do some highlights and calls her friend Tamara over. We met her last volume as she dragged her along to the show, but it’s here we really get to know what she’s like.. i.e. the sane one in the duo, rightfully pointing out Scott’s not that great. Also Knive’s points out ramona’s “fat”, which is thankfully portrayed as petty sniping as while Ramona does have some curves it’s you know.. not remotely a bad thing and the kind of thing a teenage girl would harp on. Still she’s just in STEPS from this happening.

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But yeah.. it’s clear here Knives has some underlying issues to address and really needs therapy not to go after her ex’s current girlfriend with knives. I mean it’s in the name but still. Then again volume 4 has her dad going around with a katana or something like it wanting to murder her daughter’s older ex boyfriend he dosen’t realize is ex so it’s clear her whole FAMILY needs some therapy. But this does round her out and show there’s more to her.. a pretty violent and obessive side sure, but it shows she wasn’t just some one dimensional ego boost for scott but a person. One whose just as flawed as the rest of the cast.. but more sympatheic because they’ve all got about 6 or 7 years on her and at this age that’s a lifetime. And while Scott DID set this off by dating her which was objecitvely a bad idea... the rest of this isn’t remotely on him. He handled things BAD.... but all he wanted was for both of them to move on. Knives.. simply can’t admit Scott is not a nice person, was probably two timing her as Tamara points out, which as we know he 100% was, and is not some perfect guy she can’t replace: like Knives.. he’s just a person with faults and she’s too blind to see that.

So before we can get to the crazy stalker ninja fight, let’s instead get to Scott and Ramona hanging out where we meet Gideon, Ramona’s Cat who i’ll call Cat Gideon, both because I love steven unvierse and because it’s less confusing. This is a pretty slight scene as Ramona admits not a lot happened with Lucas and Scott’s apartment is a hole.. which yeah, yeah it is. Also she DEFINTLY dind’t cheat on him with any cocky pretty boys. Which would come off worse if it wasn’t for the pact Ramona was clearly doing it out of regret and Scott just liked like 50 pages ago about rembering his exes when one of them is his second best friend.. which neither would admit but you know it’s true. Stephen is third where he belongs.

So next morning it’s fight time, and Scott is glad wallace is going with him. It’s awkard going to fights alone. Which leaves me to wonder if before this comic Scott just.. fought random guys letterkenny style. Like they’d call up, schedule it and then he and one or more of his friends would go beat up a guy. It’s just.. hilarious knowing that this kind of thing is common in canda minus the ki attacks , flash effects, wizards, vegan psycics, ninjas, and roboticists. But damn I now want a scott pilgrimized letterkenny now more than ever. You know you do too don’t deny it. I”d love to see the hard right jay fight but iwth a loud “KO!” when he gets his ass knocked out. Also Casa Loma is a very real, very cool Toronto location, as I never realized as a kid, to the point that the lucas fight was filmed there for the movie.

So Scott approaches Lucas a bit star struck and upon finding out scott is.. punches him out as seen in the header image and throws him into a tower. When Scott regains conciousness, Kim and Neil have arrived and Lucas calls a time out. And it’s here we get to, while being the weakest of the 7, why I like Lucas.. he’s actually a pretty nice guy. At WORST he sold out. But the two have a pretty nice conversation over ritz and baby carrots, with it turning out, unsuprisingly Ramona did cheat on him with a cocky pretty boy, and while like Ramona he’s clearly moved on, it still hurts a bit and understandably so. He also warns scott while she might seem nice i’ts an act.

I mean it isn’t ALL an act, but she does have a tedency to put up walls and act pretty badly as we’re slowly finding out.. though given Scott does the exact same it only means.. she’s human. She’s not MUCH higher above him in terms of morality and this is where we get our first peaks into the fact the series isn’t just about Scott’s development but hers. But it’s understandably absent from volumes 1 and 2 since we need to know her first, and this volume is about getting to know her a bit and get a feel for who she is, something I ddin’t really get a grip on as a teen, but do now. We see more of who she is good and bad as the walls go down. She’s more SURFACE LEVEL functional than scott, but beneath it has a lot of the same exact issues. Lucas and Scott continue to GENUINELY bond, as Scott genuinely thinks the guy is talented and Lucas want’s an Oscar this year.. maybe not for the current film which is a romantic comedy with a teen star but hey, stars have done far worse in their Oscar years. I mean at least he’s not making a comedy about himself in a fat suit domestically abusing himself in a wig while he also plays an asian sterotype. He explains he almost didn’t get into the league but felt too important to ramona’s past.. plus he looks cool. Plus they let Patel in despite barely being in a relationship with her and being kind of a tool so they kinda had to let the handsome affiable movie star in. Scott wonders “wait league” and Lucas is understandably frustrated to find out Patel just sent a letter Scott didn’t read.. and at Matthew let’s be clear. I mean.. Gideon has to have known Scott wouldn’t read that since he’s been in his head. We’ll get to that in part 6. Point is they formed a league, hence why their organized enough to come after him like this and Scott understandably glares at Wallace for you know, having him play tony hawk and watch movies yet missing the fucking obvious clue they were all working together and they were only coming at him one at a time by choice.

Lucas offers to just.. take a bribe and SAY Scott beat him, Scott calls him a sellout jokingly and Lucas proves that while not AS bad as the rest of the League, he’s still a dick by telling him to kiss ramona’s sweet ass goodbye pilgrim. Okay either he’s seen her since high school or he’s fondly remembering a high schooler’s ass. Neither one is nice to think about. But Scott gets out of his ass beating by pointing out a ramp, real thing too used for the movie, and asking him to skate down it. Lucas says i’ts impossible, and Scott just whistles. So Lucas tries skating the impossible and dies via velocity. Yes really. Scott collects his change and gets a gift, a mytryil skateboard he.. can’t use because he dosen’t have a proficency for it and bemoans not picking it up in 5th grade. Also he didn’t get his autograph. He does get some coins though so neat. Yeah I mentioend Lucas was the least of the exes and I stand by it: He’s an intresting character, not a GREAT person but clearly a charming and nice enough guy who likely offered the bribe not because he’sd a sell out but because he genuinely liked scott, and is easily the best adjusted of the exes. But obviously a near non existant setup and a really hilarious and unsastifying finish just.. don’t really feel sastsifying. I mean i’t slampshaded, but after all the build up of her having 7 evil exes, the next one is just..filler. Not BAD, but not really anything special and giving Scott a an early pokemon victory, but unlike ash having done nothing to really DESERVE it. Thankfully both adaptations so far VASTLY improved on this. While Lucas is still affiable in the movie he’s also smarmy, if on better terms with Ramona, saying “he seems nice” after the tower throw and throwing in some stunt doubles. His fight goes from one of the least satisfying and weakst of the series, to easily one of the best of the movie. We’ll talk about that more there but obvious Chris Evans version is far superior, keeping the good traits while giving us an intresting fight.. and still keeping the skateboard death because it’s fucking hilarious and the movie improves on THAT too by having scott give flat wows as he slowly dies. The game likewise keeps teh skateboard death, if shortening it, and the skateboard, and while not changing his apperance does make him a hell of a tough boss. Took three tries and some online grinding to take him out. Still a hell of a fight. Point is while I genuinely like Lucas story wise.. this just dosen’t work for me and is pretty damn weak, even if it gives us some godo character insight we could’ve got that, and a fight and still had the finish we did.

That being said.. we DO get a fight instead, likely why the Lucas fight was so truncated. Next chapter and that evening or the next day or whatever, we pan over the real life tornto refrence library. It is a VERY nice touch thatt the comic and it’s adpations use either real places in toronto or reasonable subsittues. While not canadian myself I love the place and hope to visit Tornoto some day when the world isn’t a living nightmare and it’s really nice that like New York for Marvel, Brian Lee O malley really makes the city feel integral to the comic, like it’s own character. But Knives is ominously perched above. At second cup Scott is horrified to find Julie. Seconded. Julie takes the moment to give out to scott about him dating Ramona despite telling him no. Okay...

Yeah as you can probably guess I don’t like Julie. She’s not a good character. The movie did her better, with the bleeping gag and aubrey plaza’s performance, but in the comic.. she’s just the worst. She sucks bad. If she were an ice cream flavor she’d be pralines and dick. While she’s fine on OCCASION, and actually works in the next volume, outside of that she just gets more unplesant, more unlikeable, more bitchy, more unfathomabbly assholish every. damn. volume. I”ll give out about that a bit then too but I have to put up with her for the entire damn comic. Now her being bitchy to Scott is fair to a point: Scott is a mess, and she’s loyal to Envy in the breakup, and Scott’s own friends drag him on a daily basis. The problems are that she’s like that to EVERYONE, even Knives who isn’t about to stab her much as i’d like that. She’s unberable to Stephen whose tolerance for her is unfathomable, though the ending bits of volume 6 show maybe he just has terrble taste. She’s just a throughly unplesant, social climbing bitch who thinks she’s better than everyone. And it sticks out badly against the main cast; Scott is very bad with women and relating to people, but is also nice, charming and most of the damage he does is not intetional. Ramona puts up walls to keep others out but is also a responsible adult and often cuts through Scott, and at times others, internal bullshit. Wallace is an alcholic, but still a very responsible, very loveable guy who clearly cares about scott and supports him finacially and emotionally. Kim is VERY emotionally distant, very misntrhopic.. but also a good person who as we see as the series goes, has an inner light to her and often drags on Scott because she’s been putting up with his shit the longest and WANTS him to be better. Knives is an obessive and violent stalker.. who was also deeply hurt by an older man, dosen’t GET that her realtionship with scott was wrong and uneven, and is clearly not emtoinallyr eady for the deep feelings she’s having. And Stephen.. well he’s a talented guitarist but also enables scott and julie. Especially him enabling Julie.

Point is their all pretty well rounded, llikeable characters with flaws. Julie.. is just an ass. And this scene demonstrates that with flying colors. While Scott does ignore her because he’s too worried about his sister and girlfriend becoming friends, understandably given Stacey knows all his dark secrets, Julie spends two pages giving out and treating scott like some bad guy for persuing Ramona against her orders. And i’m going to break down why.. this dosen’t work.. on any level for her. 1) Ramona is not Julie’s property. She’s a big girl with her own free will. They aren’t even remotely close: Julie met her only barely before Scott, and given the dream thing probably not even that. And you could say Julie is just looking out for her... she dosen’t know Ramona well enough to KNOW if Ramona is still smarting over Gideon. She probably was.. but she readily, once the awkwardness passed, went out with scott and dove right into the relationship. While there’s still some scars as we’ll see.. she CHOOSE to move on and that’s her choice. If she wasn’t ready, she woudl’ve turned him down or broke it off by now realizing it was a mistake. 2) Scott has no reason to listen to her. She hates his ass, somewhat justifably but still, she hates him and has been against him since fucking colllege. She took his exes side in the breakup despite Envy still being partly in the wrong but paints him as some abusive dickhead and not just an insesntive dickhead. To him he’s just some villian she needs to reign in for her cool friend who wants nothing to do with her and grows to justifably hate her over time. Scott and Julie TOLERATE each other. They are not friend,s they do not like each other and never will. They are around each other because of Stephen. That is it. If Kim , Wallace or Stephen had asked, or at least made him wait for kinves. he probablyw ould’ve or at least considered it since while they take the piss out of him, they genuinely care about him and actually have shown they care about something other than themselves! Speaking of which the cou de gras 3) She’s a selifsh bitch: She is NEVER not in any volume seen as out for anyone but herself, and thus scott has no reason to trust her judgement. She berates Stephen, him and anyone who will listen, is only so loyal to envy because she’s famous, and as I said treats EVERYONE like dogshit. And given Scott is still a very flawed guy.. it takes a LOT for him to be so right and he runs out screaming when Julie mentions her.

So back at the library, Ramona brought Stacey along because the place is a maze. Scott calls Stephen and calls julie evil.. which given the last two paragrahs. Yeah. She is. She really is. But that goes nowhere as he dosen’t have Stacey’s number. He also thinks Julie was responsible for this which while she’s very much not.. would it REALLY be that suprising that if Julie were there she would’ve introdcued the two and set up their little hangout just to piss scott off? God I’m so sick of talking about her.

So the two after dropping off Ramona’s package decide to hang out a bit.. not long as Ramona’s got shit to do, but hey I agree with her logic i’m curious about this palce too. But before they can go up an elevator Ramona spots incoming.. and thus we get the fight of the volume. Though given the next one has two climatctic fights and one or two before that, they easily could’ve had both.. this is still the highlight of the volume. So Ramona snaps off a railing and before Stacey can give out about that she finds out WHY as Knives attacks with a pair of sais. And O’Malley did his homework as while you’d THINK it was just another dumb white person mistake.. O’Malley is asian, thoughw ether he’s candaian korean or canadian chineses, as his last name is korean but he has a large chinese cast in this very comic that might come from experince, I do not know and if you do know tell me. I’d like to refer to him properly as I don’t LIKE lumping all asian cultures into one basket. But not only that he did his home work, as Sai’s, while popularized in Okinawa Japan, were also used in other countries. I bring this up since I assumed it was just a simple mistake even knowing Brian was mixed-race, and was plesantly suprised to fine that know, I was the moron. And i’m fine with admitting that.

So we get a damn good fight.. and Knives figures out Scott WAS cheating on her. Granted she assumes so due to seeing Ramona at the refrence Library, before he actually cheated and clearly blames Ramona for it, but still, it fucking hurts. Plus while her attacking Ramona, who initally assumes she’s gideon’s doing, which.. yeah sending a teenage assasian just to mess with her head does sound like him. So while Stacey does complain “ramona you can’t just tear out art objects” to which I say... yeah high, Stacey? NOT THE POINT RIGHT NOW SCOTT’S EX IS TRYING TO KILL HER. SHE’S DEFENDING HERSELF. So we get one hell of a fight. It not only shows off that Ramona is one hell of a fighter herself, as is knives, but just how immature knives is, resorting to constnat fat jokes and taunts showing just how immature she is.. and unlike volume one where it was endearing and we just saw how sweet she was here it just comes off as mean, bitter, and uncomfortable. But again part of the series biggest charm is the main cast are all well fleshed out and throughly human. She’s doint this because she dosen’t know better and was raised in a house where, again as volume 4 will bear out, finding out her dad is going after scott with a samurai sword just warrants a “dad’s are so weird aren’t they” my point is her frame of refrence is a mite skewed. Plus this is a world where everyone but Stacey just calmly accepts big shonen fights break out, so it’s not that unsuaul to want to settle things with a fight and while i’ve joked about her killing Ramona we genuinely don’t know that was the goal> Could’ve been, easily given murder is peachy in this setting and just leads to a respawn according to O’Malley and would’ve just sent ramona back to her apartment. But I genuinely don’t think she has it in her to do it and while she could’ve planend to, she never would’ve. Plus Ramona easily leads the fight as while Knives uses hit and run tactics and tries make her follow.. Ramona is more annoyed than anything as she has shit to do. Knives only gets one hit in and while i’ts a pretty nasty scratch on the cheek, if thankfully not scarring.. Ramona shrugs it off when she brags about it and easily takes knives down with a potted tree. Knives runs and while she tells herself it’s to fight another day.. its really because her opponent was WAY stronger and way more ready for something like this than she probably planned on. She did defintely want a fight, she just wasn’t prepared to be outmatched so handily. It’s also a nice parallel to last book’s fight: Like with Scott and Matthew, while the fight SEEMS pretty even, in reality our hero/heroine was alwasy teh one in control and easily took care of the less experinced and less ready upstart, who likely wasn’t expecting a fair fight much less to loose.

So Ramona and Stacey wisely get out while Stacey explains Knives is indeed Scott’s ex, though is unaware of the cheating thing. Speaking of Scott he’s playing sonic and knuckles, and in fact kept wallace on the line before just to get advice because of course he did hence why stacey didn’t get through to him, but gets a call... from Envy.

This is easily the second best sequence in the boook, which was lovingly and wonderfully adapted to film and as a result I cannot read it without hearing Brie Larson’s voice for Envy , a nice mixture of seduction and condescension. It’s CLEARLY painful fo rhim, and we do get some things established as Envy toys with him, that it’s been about a year and that she left him for a cocky pretty boy, familiar.. and while Scott claims to not know what he looks like.. given Todd is clearly on her band cover... it’s not exactly hard to put two and two together. So after some awkard catchup and Scott telling her about ramona against his will, we get to the reason she’s here with Scott understanndbly being supscious and calling her a user.. which while Envy denys.. she ends up admitting to. She’s coming to town as estalbished and her opening act backed out, and since Scott has a band, and one that 2/3 of which she knows, she wants them to open for her. Scott naturally isn’t too intrested and thinks it’s just pity. The sequence. is masterful, using a watchmen style 9 by 9 panel layout and intercutting scott’s pained reactions and clear lack of comfort with flashes of envy on her side.. never showing her proper, but showing his memories or what he’s seen in magazines. It’s really striking and really sells the sheer discomfort Scott’s going through. So soon after Wallace gets home.. and finds Scott, drained and miserable on the floor, not even responsive. And this really is the scene that shows me that Wallace cares for the guy and cements that asshole he may be, he loves his buddy. He goes through possible scenarios that fit scott: Food poisoning, finding out Wallace saved over his final fantasy save (though he rules it out as last time that happened he was crying), that ramona dumped him.. before Scott let’s out a pathetic and miserable “Ennnnnvvv”. Wallace , who was at ground zero for that relationship as we’ll find out, realizes this and lets out a little shit, unsure how to help and pissed off at that bitch for once again hurting him like this. As I said it shows how Wallace knows scott in and out and loves him dearly.. and how he knwos about this paticuarly heartbreak better than anyone but Scott and Envy themselves. IT’s just a really tearjerking scene, as we get a sense of WHY scott spiraled into an ego boost of a relationship: His last one REALLY tore him in half, and he’s still not completely healed from the emtional bisection.

So Scott gets more bad news next chapter as Stacey tells him about the fight and he’s worried he’s going to loose ramona on top of this. I mean he desrves it.. .but it’s clear she’s the best thing to happen to him after a really rough year of denial and poor decisionss and loosing her will likely only make him WORSE. He also breaks the bad news, to him at least to the band about the gig. Stephen, being kind of a dick who while understandbly excited about a big gig fails to see his friend REALLY isn’t happy about this nor remembers you know, that the person offering this tore his heart out indiana jones style and while they should take the gig despite the risks, it’s too big an opportunity not to, he should be fucking senstive about this. Kim however... has a suprising and heartbreaking reactoin to this. Which is spread over a few panels but i’m gonna string into one image for convince sake.

Just.. DAMN. I honeslty missed this both as a teenager and as an adult when I read through the books last time but holy shit is this a heartbreaking little moment, even more with the development she gets in later books. Keep in mind, over two books so far, Kim.. really hasn’t shown a lot of emtion. The most upset she’s gotten was getting a bit pissed about another a girl drummer. The only other time we’ve seen her sad was at 17 when Scott left. Her only emotions that we could see were angry and surly. But here? She’s genuinely upset and we see her walls break down for the very first time.. and it’s with the clear indication she NEVER really got over Scott. She never got proper closure and while she hasn’t let it so.. it’s been VERY clear she's been grossly uncomfortable with how he just likes to brush off their history, something that very clearly still bothers her and understandably so: 6 years , while a lot of time, still really isn’t long enough to just .. FORGET your first boyfriend , how he made you feel or the fact he took your virginity and you took his. Stuff like that sticks with you.. I’m ony assuming on the virginity thing but my point remains: To Scott it’s SEEMINGLY nothing, when really he’s probably just trying to brush it off because he dosen’t like dealing with things and given how Kim is wrongly assumed she can’t feel pain. I mean to anyone else i’d be a fair assumption and even i’m not convinced if she touched a hot stove she’d burn, but that’s phsysical this is emotional. DIffrent playing fields. Point is Scott’s kind of a dick and not having ANY closure for anything, Kim is still smarting from him leaving as much as Scott is smarting from Envy dumping him. And it somehow gets MORE painful.... which should’ve been the tagline for Bojack Horseman now I think about it but yeah: her line is what cuts me up the most “I saw her on the cover of Now. She’s pretty”. It’s a little line, it’s easy to see why I missed it .. but the subtext really stings. It’s that despite being VERY pretty, I had a crush on her as a kid and I still do now.. Kim just can’t help but compare herself to someone whose now a glamrous rock star. Their equally attractive but all Kim can see is ANOTHER person who Scott cared about more than her. Which seems petty but again he just.. abnadoned her. His moving wasn’t his choice but his not telling her as was framed earlier sure as hell was. And then just.. look at the next people he dates: A glamorous rock star (She wasn’t at the time but that’s for next week), a much younger girl who can’t possible challenge him, and an ultra cool american. To her.. it must feel like he just looks right through her to every other person intersted in him and never even consdered her as a person anymore. I mean.. jesus christ that hurts.. and makes me hate Stephen more since you know he dosen’t notice any of this.. though at least unlike with Scott it’s a bit more understandable because Kim’s so unflappable and he’s already ignoring very obvious and transparent emotional pain why shouldn’t this be any diffrent. So yeah no one’s happy about this, and that ends up including Stephen as he’s so insecure about his band’s talent he’s pretty sure they suck when their probably at least adaquate.

So while Scott dosen’t say anything, it’s clear he’s at least consdiering the offer as when we next see him he and ramona are heading to Envy’s show. And honestly it’s just a really sweet scene as Ramona asks about envy and the two banter and hold hands. A really nice palletee clensar since hte last few pages were like I was the one lucas socked in the gut. Also she assures him she dosen’t hate him, and asks about how the breakup happened, turning down any offers to hear the good times. It was new years eve one year ago, and he mentions it was over her leaving to meet some guy named Todd.. and Ramona finds the story familiar but brushes off Scott wondering if her todd and Envy’s todd wer ethe same guy as a douchey joke. When prying about what happened otherwise, Scott admits it was all a blur.. Ramona isn’t ahppy with the answer.. but it’s nto like it’s that unresonable: he was in deep with Envy, and the breakup was damn bad to the point it took a year for him to recover and end up in the relationship he is now and the one before this was clearly a cry for help. It also helps reinfroce just how much Wallace was there for him and probably WHY Wallace hates Envy so much. They probably live together simply because Scott needed a place after college, was in zero condition to get a job or do anything given his zombie like state.. and Wallace just had him move into his bed, platonically and into his place. It’s probably why while Wallace will complain ocasoinally he isn’t that on scott to find a job. He dosen’t need a paying roomate, they do fine just on his sallary and he has a steady, secure job in some sort of calling office, probably working in medical stuff like my mom. He needs his friend to be safe and happy, then he can get on his ass about being functional, as he is in present day. If nothing else this volume made me realize just how good a person Wallace is. The one thing he CAN remember, to Ramona’s disbelif is a restraunt opening up, the job story he hinted at last volume: basically it was a fancy tex mex place called, and this is one of the best restraunt naems in the history of fiction brace yourself: The Gilded Palace of Flying Burritos. Naturally, as would I as I love tex mex and that name, Scott loved the place, ate there most of the week and like me with some places I liked waited impatietly to get a job. He did and they were even super generous as the food was FREE. Which is a euphoric feeling I relate to, though I also liked any discounts I got. seriously when I worked at Bagel and Bagel a good chunk of my paycheck was eating there for dirt cheap every shift. I miss that place so much. Like even after I left there I still like a good bagel sandwitch. And it wasn’t covid or anything it was just low staffed and slowly coming apart due to a lack of a solid manager after Crystal, the manager who hired me, transfered to a store closer to her home, which I do not blame her for.

Point is I get it even if Ramona thinks this is all made up. Anyways at Lee’s Place, based on the real life Leo’s place, everyone’s gussied up: Steven got an awful haircut and Kim...

But no time to dwell on how great kim’s..everything is.. who DID Neil bring to the concert?

While Kim is VERY much enjoying this, everyone else is a bit freaked with Ramona getting assurance her and Scott dated breifly, with Kim quipping her and neil will probably date even breiflyer, and Stephen.. freaking out, wondering if she seduced him, and asking if they should take him out back and kick his ass..

Just..... that’s a lot of douche to unpack and this review has been VERY long and suprisingly hard already.. but fuck it, we don’t have much left to go let’s do this. Okay one did she seduce him.. I mean I GUESS, but really let’s be clear here: Neil is a horny, lonely, monosolobic 19 year old who lives with his sister’s college friend and whose life revovles around said guys band. Knives is adorable. She likely barely had to flirt with him to get him to say yes .As someone who was a lonely 19 year old doofus, I guarantee no matter the red flags I probably woudl’ve said yes provided she was 18 instead of 17, despite the abudant red flags such as neil vaugely looking like scott, neil being the one single man within scott’s circle to get her way back in, as Knives hasn’t realized she’s bi yet or given how much she looked up to Kim, she probably WOULD’VE gone for it. As would any sane person, which neither knives nor I entirley are. So she didnt’ so much seduce him as offer him a girlfriend he didn’t have and him being too intrested in having a sweet, caring girl on his arm to see the giant army of adrestian soldiers needed to carry all the red flags this presents.

And as for “do we need to kick his ass. “ Stephen.. did you kick SCOTT’S ass? No, you fucking abetted him and only stepped in for the good girl thing. You did NOTHING to stop his relationship with knives or tell him he was screwing up or look out for that girl’s well being. This will bite him in the ass even harder in volume 5, but even now it just makes him look REALLY fucking bad that, even if he probably dosen’t mean it, that’s at all on the table. Also.. Neil, unlike scott is doing slightly less wrong. While he is 20 to her 17, three years.. it’s HALF of what Scott and her’s age diffrence is, and far more equal in power structure. It’s still not.. GREAT, but my point is you did NOTHING when Scott did this, for far flimiser and less forgiavble reasons.. but when NEIL, whose been nothing but weirdly loyal to you dates her, you want to kick someone’s ass. I mean yes he’s being stupid: in a clear role reversal of the Scott and Knives situation, it’s obvious just from her expression that KNVIES is the one in control here, and the one using someone to ease her own pain. Granted it’s wrong, if not as wrong as Scott should techincally know better and Knives very clearly dosen’t, as well as get into a show of her faviorite band. Is what she’s doing wrong.. yeah... while she can’t see it again it’s what Scott did just not QUITE as fucked up due to not being AS embalanced. Should neil probably be dating her after scott did ? No. But should you be threatning him and not scott for you know, setting all this in motion? No. Jesus christ you suck Steven.

Thankfully while Scott presumibly calms Stephen down, Kim spots Hollie and her roomate Joseph, who will be suprisingly important. He’s very gay, very quite, very bearded and is only hear because the bass player is hot and when prodded on it....

Well said. Also I read that with John Heder’s voice fo rsome reason.. don’t know why, his career ended as quickly as it began because he REALLY did not pick his films well. He saw that he was going to be in a film with David Spade and Rob Schinder and didn’t fire his agent for suggesting it. Meanwhile Scott and Ramona run into Sandra and Monique, Scott’s old classmates who just sorta.. show up every so oftne, often backing up Julie because every Alpha Bitch needs a posse. As Boscha has proven once you loose your posse you loose your bitchy powers. They also ask if Scott and Ramona are an item which leads to a fantagious visual gag.

Also Stephen awkardly talks to the new couple, about how much Knives loves the band, and because why start reading the room now just sorta.. CASUALLY slips in the fact he knows her is because she and scott dated.

Granted Knives action this book really EARNED her that curveball.. but still, it’s transparently clear she’s both not over Scott and Neil’s a placebo, and that she loves the band... how the fuck did you get through college, much less get two loyalish friends Steve.

Kim tries to hide when she runs into Sarah whose with.. someon O Malley does not know, literally captioning it “I don’t know htis girl”. Fucking love that gag even if SOMEHOW kim is the roomate they all hate. Despite hte fact as the side story will bare out, her roommates are all pretty obnoxious, so i’ts probably because she’s the only sane person in that group and their VERY lucky kim just dind’t set the place on fire on her way out and let god do what he should’ve a long time ago. Also we meet Lynette, the band’s drummer who smokes “She must be evil” “Still hot though”... both accurate. Also Luke wilson is there.. no really. Just holy shit that’s awesome. Okay so with all of that out of the way, it’s time for the show. So after a full volume’s build up , and a really cool build up in the page before we finally properly meet clash at the demonhead, and miss envy adams.

Heck of a reveal and not the only one as ramona realized what the audience probably already guessed....

Dun dun dun! And since I don’t like leaving a cliffhanger dangling lest I have to... we’ll be getting to this next week.. what you thought i’d say right now or tommorow? This was a lot. But no i’m not leaving you too long. Next week, Evil Ex Crossover! Ramona and Wallace become BFF’s! We learn what the deal with Scott and Envy is! Scott faces the Ken to his Ryu! And Wallace gets a boyfriend. All this and more next week. for now...

Final Thoughts: This one.. was a VERY rough one to review and it ties back to this volume’s biggest problem: it is not paced very well. Like the series as a whole it has a pretty easy going, slice of life pace. The only ones without this kind of easy pacing are 3 and 6, and even 3 has some slice of life bits, their just both more focused due to the events going on. This one... well....

Pretty much. While this one has very important stuff going on, Scott and ramona getting closer, ramona getting more fleshed out, Wallace showing how deep his character is, Kim also getting fleshed out quite a bit, Knives showing off her crazy side, setting up the next volume, the second ex fight.. it’s all just kinda.. jumbled together. It’s not really until the knives fight onward the book takes on some really solid pacing and really gets going.It’s not a BAD book: ther’es some REALLY good character stuff as I dug into.. but the pacing is just really loose and without the Evil Ex fight as an anchor and with ramona and scott just sorta.. getting to know one another, in both biblical and non biblical senses, it dosen’t have either of the series main narrative thrusts. Even the knvies subplot really amoutns to nothing for now, as Ramona dosen’t find out Scott’s a cheater, and only distrusts knives now. That’s about it. It does improve on book one in characterization, with eveyrone being MUCH cleearer in terms of who they are and settling into their iconic selves nicely. Wallace’s more selfless and protective side pops up, Ramona starts to show mroe of her personality good and bad, Scott’s better traits are mixed a bit mor eeven with the douche ones, Knive’s far more unstable and violet stalker side emerges, and Stephen.. well fuck him, point is things are coming together.. but O’Malley still isn’t quite at peak power yet. Not bad and still worth a read like last time, just a bit uneeven is all. That being said... if you want O’Malley at his peak.. well then come back next week. Until then i’ll be doing my usual buisness of reviewing birds, refrencing simpsons and letterkenny, and putting my eyes back in after kim’s look up there. For now the sun’s setting and i’m out of here.

#scott pilgrim #scott pilgrim vs the world #ramona flowers #kim pine #stephen stiles #wallace wells #envy adams #lucas lee #oni press #Brian Lee O'malley #knives chau #neil nordgraf

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