#Sergeant Carter

[benevolenterrancy]

hi! I'm really stuck on Carter lately, if you're still taking requests I'd love something where Carter's working on some kind of chemical experiment where he's not supposed to, and it blows up all over him and Klink.. and Hogan's there like a disappointed father

hogan can forgive questionable chemical experiments, but he draws the line at a bad lie -- carter will have some explaining to do back at the barracks! (...doubly so when lebeau sees what happened to his pot)

[frau-wilhelm-klink]

[sgtandrewcarter]

My ma always said I was special. If she could see me now, blowing up bridges, blowing up ammo dumps, blowing up factories.. well, she might be a little curious where I learned how to make explosives, but I think she'd be proud.

[someguywriting]

[cpllouislebeau]

((I'm thinking of maybe starting a GC of people interested in Hogan's Heroes. Comment or DM if you're interested!

[overlyattachedto70s-sitcoms]

little carter sketch so satiate myself as i toil away on the fucking painting

[aod1098]

The original, "I CAN'T HEAR YOU!!!!" This is such a terrible edit, but I just can't help laughing at it. It's funny.

[spacemanxpaninis]

Who in Hogan’s Heroes is Most Likely to Be With an Alt Person?

Inspired by a chat in my discord 😌 enjoy HH fans and alt people, or if you’re me both 😆

MOST

Marya

Hogan

Carter

Helga

LeBeau

Klink

Kinch

Hilda

Newkirk

Schultz

Least

• We all know Marya would be all over you. Flirting with you immediately, teasing you and giving you both compliments and pet names. It becomes her personal mission to fluster you who look so unflappable and also just to put a smile on your face. You are more than your looks to her just as she is to you- you have such interesting stories to tell and her attention will be on you the entire time.

• Colonel Hogan is lowkey into everybody, I said what I said 🤷🏻‍♀️ your alt style is almost like a challenge to him. A danger. What can he say? He likes a little danger. Hopefully that style of yours comes with the teasing attitude he can’t help falling for. Hogan is happy to swap leather jackets with you or better yet you’ll forget yours so he can unzip his and drape it over you, not in any hurry to take his hands off.

• If anyone is to look at you with simple, whimsical curiosity, it’s one Mr. Andrew Carter. He’ll be open approaching you with questions even if they do come out bashful from the way you look at him, the rush he feels at your gaze. Carter hopes your rebellious streak lends to enjoying blowing things up, too, and he’s the most understanding person you’ll ever meet if you feel like you’re different because you know what? So does he.

• Our Miss Helga loves a bad boy/girl 😌 It gives her a rush just looking at you and thinking of all the places you could sweep her off to. How she could escape a dull life as a secretary for some unknown adventure and danger with you. No shame in some little fantasies as she works, she tells herself.

• Louis LeBeau? Our short king who will kill you? Simps for an alt person. You’ve got fire in you and he respects that. And sure, it turns him on a little too. He’s only human, after all! It warms his heart to see you putting spike collars on the guard dogs and being so sweet with them despite your intimidating looks. He probably teases you a lot but is very flirty, too. Comes up with some French nickname for you having a dark side even though you’re so nice!

• Sorry, but not sorry: Klink is turned on by the leather. The boots. The power you exude. The moment you enter Wilhelm Klink’s office and his life, he is a simp for you. He’s wrapped around your finger ready to give you whatever you want. Wine and dine of course and he may try to play you a little music- go easy on him! Or don’t. He won’t mind 🤷🏻‍♀️

• Not that they hurt, but looks aren’t everything to Kinch. He cares more about what’s inside and he respects that the way you dress is your personal expression. It does appeal to him how unique your expression is and he is actually the most willing to try out elements of your style. He just laughs and does voices as you dress him up, reveling a bit in being taken care of since he is such a natural caretaker himself.

• Hilda likes a bad boy/girl too, but she also has more desire for someone to settle down with. You’re attractive and a lot of fun, but she’ll definitely feel a bit of a desire to nail you down. Or maybe you two will simply end up fighting for who gets to pin who down…👀

• Newkirk, for all his antics, would feel a bit insecure in his masculinity around someone with a tough image. Especially when it comes to women, he likes the feminine look and someone he feels like he can have a little control over. Not that he’s fully toxic, but he definitely wants to be the dominant partner and be the one rakishly sweeping you off your feet, not the other way around! He’d need some convincing.

• Sweet Sergeant Schultz, quite frankly, is intimidated by you. Maybe even a little confused when he sees the way you dress and carry yourself. He might even ask why you’re dressed like that not realizing it isn’t for some role or purpose, you just enjoy it! Once he hears that and especially if you show him a sweet or flirty side (or both!), though, you will quickly have him forced to admit he’s attracted to you.

[sgtandrewcarter]

Hey, that's me! But what's autism?

Autism Acceptance Month: Autistic Headcanons - Sgt. Andrew J. Carter (Hogan’s Heroes)

“I’ll design my greatest bomb.”

[benevolenterrancy]

@pazithigallifreya a fine lookin' fellow!

[frau-wilhelm-klink]

Hogan just looks so done😄

(Credit goes to @colpapabear for the images.)

[sgtandrewcarter]

Colonel Hogan yelled at Newkirk for stealing a bottle of whiskey, but I don't think he did it! He was too drunk to steal any whiskey.

[anna-pineappel]

Head-canons!

Head-canons!

Head-canons!

Buckle up, I have quite a few headcanons for Hogan’s Heroes and the characters! I also have some Klogan-ship specific headcanons but I’ll focus on the characters. I’m also going to follow @frau-wilhelm-klink’s format. This gets long, sorry not sorry!

I also have specific head-canons for my fics, especially my long ones since there’s a lot happening and it’s too easy to derail and I need something to keep me on track! 😅 I could easily make separate posts for Walk Through Fire and Peace in the Moonlight (including its Prequel, which is now titled Terror in the Shadows)

General:

Either Klink/Burkhalter is Nimrod - it fluctuates depending on the Plot of a fic I’m writing. But I can see arguments of either or. (Why Burkhalter keeps Klink in his post, why he lets Hogan stick around in Klink’s office when he comes around. Why Klink tolerates Hogan’s antics, why he’s so high strung).

The Germans spoke German a lot more (obviously the show was in English for an English-speaking audience). However, Klink and Schultz would often speak English for Hogan and his men’s sake. Hogan and the gang all understand German in varying degrees but are fairly fluent in it.

The POWs definitely formed a found-family situation at Stalag 13. They all need each other and even though a horrible thing brought them together, they wouldn’t have it any other way. Klink and Schultz somehow became part of the found family too. (They are like that uncle that you’re not quite sure about, but turn out to be pretty cool and let you drink beer behind your parents’ backs).

The Germans (the Main 4):

Klink (trying to stay human in an inhumane business):

Is not the complete dummkopf that everyone makes him out to be. If he’s Nimrod, he’s just anxious about anyone else finding out. Burkhalter and Hochstetter also drive him crazy and he just wants to get through the war without freezing to death on the Russian Front.

When passionate/angry, Klink doesn’t remember the English language. Any yelling that happens is most definitely in German. Also, he can get incredibly angry/intimidating when he absolutely needs to.

Feels protective over his prisoners. He has a sense of duty and frankly, doesn’t care for the Nazi’s ideology. He’s grown fond of Hogan (especially; whether platonically or romantically) and his men and wants to makes sure they live through the war.

Schultz (Gentle Giant Teddy Bear):

Got caught up in the Draft, is definitely not a Nazi, nor does he believe in the Regime. Holds a grudge for having his toy factory repossessed for the war effort. Also can’t stand all the violence/fighting that comes with the War and just wants it over.

He knows about Hogan’s men and their operation but since he opposes the Nazi Regime, he implements his ‘I know nothing, I see nothing!’ Policy and plays the fool, but often helps out in any way he can.

He and Klink are actually good friends, bonding over their hatred for the war and what has become of Germany. Klink acts tough towards Schultz but deep down, has a soft spot for him, keeping him in his post.

Burkhalter (Has no time for nonsense and will sass you):

Is 110% done with everyone and their bullshit, especially Hochstetter. He has his own agenda (whether as Nimrod or as a General), and is tired of everyone else getting in his way. He doesn’t necessarily care about people or things; that would get in the way of his Strategy.

Surprisingly, he doesn’t completely hate Klink. He’s also feeling pressure from his superiors and since Stalag 13 is a Model Prison Camp with Zero Escapes, there’s a spot-light on it and Klink. He genuinely wonders how Klink does it.

He is also… fascinated by Hogan (in a ideology/military strategy way). All he knows of America is what the Regime has told him, which is all propaganda bullshit, so he’s genuinely intrigued by Hogan and his homeland.

Hochstetter (my angry smol bean man; I’m deep into this man rn for my WIP):

Definitely has an unhealthy obsession with Hogan (to the point that it is homoerotic in a way/may be due to internalized homophobia) and is desperate to prove that he is the Underground agent Papa Bear to his superiors, who may be getting to the point of dismissing the theory since there’s no evidence.

Like Klink and Burkhalter, he is feeling the pressure from his superiors to prove that Hogan is Papa Bear, and that is why he is wound tighter than a ball of yarn. He usually is a great detective, but is letting his skills/other cases slide with his Hogan Obsession™️

Is insanely jealous of Klink for having Hogan in his custody. A man as dangerous as he claims Hogan to be should be handed over to Gestapo for questioning. Why does KLINK, of all people, get to have Papa Bear?! He also questions if there’s something going on between Klink and Hogan, but like his case for Papa Bear, he has no proof.

The POWs:

Hogan (military mastermind with a mouth that won’t shut up):

Would sacrifice himself in a heartbeat if it meant his men (and Klink and Schultz) would be safe, a bit of a martyr. He sees himself as a father/big brother figure to his men and loves them as if there his own family. He also gets fed up with them, like they’re his own family.

Can sometimes let his emotions get the better of him, and explains why he sometimes seems to be flying off the handle. Seriously, without Kinch to hold him back, Hogan is bit unhinged.

Has gotten roughed up by the Germans (the SS/Gestapo) at least once, and holds a personal grudge against the Nazi Regime. He has his own mental blocks, but his motives are to make sure no one goes through what he did.

(Bonus): Has a certain level of respect for Klink and genuinely thinks they could be friends or more after the war. He loves his men, but enjoys the company of another officer from time to time.

Kinch (Holder of the Brain Cell):

Is the gang’s rationalized thinking. He questions the sanity of himself and those around him on a daily basis, and wonders what he did to be surrounded by these maniacs (that he loves).

With his race, he, along with Hogan, knows how horrible people like the Nazis can be. He would like to go unhinged like many (especially Hogan, Newkirk and Carter), but he takes the high road, to not feed into horrific stereotypes.

Often had to prove himself to others, but not with Hogan. Hogan knew Kinch was brilliant with technology and doesn’t see race, and Kinch appreciates being treated like anyone else.

Newkirk (Lovable Bastard):

He’s been at Stalag 13 the longest, which makes sense given that England/France/Canada joined the war years before the United States. Next of the core gang for longest time at Stalag 13 is Hogan, so the two have a bond over that.

Has a (petty) criminal past, which explains the lock-picking/pick pocking skills. Forced to join the military as an alternative to jail time and he was told he could kill as many Nazis as he’d like. He gladly accepted since… yeah, Nazis suck.

Bonded well with Carter since they both have a love for mayhem and destruction. He only picks on Carter because he is teasing, but knows to stop when he really strikes a chord. Carter brings out a sensitive side to Newkirk that he wouldn’t admit to the others.

Carter (Pyromaniac with a Heart of Gold):

Is neurodivergent (whether it’s on the autism spectrum, ADHD, or a little bit of both), and is happy to be be included, and accepted in the gang, even if he doesn’t understand all the social conventions. He seems a bit dim/naive, but in fact, is one of the smartest people of the bunch.

Has special interests with chemistry and explosions, which is why he can ramble on and on about them. He gets dejected when the rest of the gang dismisses him, but often, Newkirk or Hogan come to him later and let him ramble and show an interest.

Has a close bond with both Hogan and Newkirk, he sees Hogan as an older brother and often forgets they are in the military together. Explains why he often calls him boy vs. Sir because he just… feels like family.

LeBeau (Resident Short King):

Like Hogan, has a personal grudge with the Nazis since they did occupy France after all. He might have also had a run in with the SS/Gestapo, which Hogan knows about. It took him a long time to come around to Klink not being a bad guy; he was instant friends with Schultz after the first batch of strudel.

His one pet peeve with the rest of the guys is that none of them really bothered to learn French. So whenever he’s mad, he just starts muttering in French under his breath and shaking his head. Oddly enough, he found out Klink speaks fluent French and the two of them would often talk in French, much to Hogan’s frustrations (of not understanding what the hell they are talking about).

Has aspirations to be a chef, and maybe was one before the war/occupation. He takes a great joy in cooking which is why he doesn’t mind cooking if Hogan/Klink ask him too. He would rather not cook for Nazi-scum, but he knows that Hogan (and to a lesser extent, Klink) have ulterior motives.

What are your top 3 headcanons for Hogan's Heroes in general?

What are your top 3 headcanons for each character?

[someguywriting]

you WILL read it. you WILL enjoy it.

[fireinthefireproofvault]

Come watch Hogan's Heroes, we have...

• Short king firecracker chef & self-proclaimed uncle of dogs

• Sweet goofy neurodivergent cinnamon roll who does the science & has the highest kill count in the show

• Fearless leader who definitely has favorite children & could probably convince you a brick was made of solid gold

• Lovably sleazy James Bond reject card shark who charms his way into your heart & your safe

• The quiet, capable sane one who holds everything together & has occasional bouts of sass

• Guy acting friendly & refined in an unfriendly unrefined business who wonders why he loses street cred daily

• Guy who can't always be bothered, but can always be bribed with food & we don't talk about how lowkey relatable that is enough

[did-you-expect-this]

Someone needs to take my phone away from me because I can’t stop making these stupid Hogan’s Heroes text posts 💀