#Self indulgence! Yippee!
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memento mori
When Magnus died, there was this sudden realization that Lucretia would be next.
Subconsciously, it seemed as if all the birds were waiting until the year was over. As if everything would reset, and Magnus would be back. Young, strong, and eye black from a bar fight, one which seemed like a thousand years ago now. 
But, of course, he didn’t. Because this was permanent. Taako knew that, logically. But it wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fair, he thought to himself, as he knocked on the door to Lucretia’s home.
The caretaker lady opened the door. She was a halfling, dressed in blue. Her ebony brown curls fell to her waist, and she regarded him with a soft, pitiful expression. Taako’s face soured, and his ears flattened down against his head. He didn’t need pity, especially not from a woman he barely knew.
She was… an employee for the Director, that much he knew. When the Director retired, this halfling woman was nice enough to take care of her… is what Taako was told. In his opinion, though? It wasn’t nice at all. It wasn’t generous or heartwarming or loyal or… anything that anyone wanted to tell themselves it was.
The Director didn’t need to be taken care of. She didn’t. She never did. Ever since her year alone, the Director was as stubborn as a goddamn mule. For better or for worse, she got things done with her head stuck up her ass. Refusing to ask for help. Refusing to let people do things for her. Refusing to admit she was ever wrong, even if her actions caused a person to forget their second half. 
And yet, despite himself, Taako was in her home.
The halfling escorted him to the living room. She offered a glass of water, but Taako turned her down. He didn’t say why he was here, but apparently, he did not need to ask. The halfling just looked down sadly when he rejected her offer and turned on her heel. Taako stared at the rug. Has she always had that pattern?
The Director was wheeled in. Taako didn’t look up. 
“Taako,” the Director began, but quickly erupted into a coughing fit. Taako continued to stare down the carpet like it had wronged him personally. Seriously, medallion? Who was the Director getting her style from, anyway?
“Still alive, eh? ‘S stubborn as ever, I see,”  Taako laughed, not unkindly, but not familiar. The tone in his voice was distant, and the Director could tell that Taako had something on his mind. She pursed her lips thoughtfully, and she quickly dismissed the halfling from the room. 
“Taako, as much as you know I always love it when you visit, more than I can properly put into words, why now?” 
“Can’t an elf see his family once in a while?” Taako moaned dramatically.
“Taako.”
“It’s my day off.”
“Taako.”
“Lup wanted me to.”
“Good fucking hell, Taako!” the Director snapped, forehead creased. She sighed and her face fell, too old to argue. She sat up straight and folded her hands over her lap, her back popping as she did so.
“Don’t fuck around with me, Taako. I’m 109 years old. It’s a miracle I lasted longer than Magnus.” 
Taako flinched like he’d been slapped. She continued.
“I’m too old to play games, so I’m gonna make this short.” She paused, as if considering her next words. 
“I lived with so, so many regrets. I don’t want to die with just as many. It’s been years since… since the day of Story and Song,” Lucretia said. Even all these years later, none of them have been able to speak of what happened in full. “Every time I take a breath, I hope it isn’t my last. Each time I close my eyes I beg the gods that I’ll be alive to open them. It’s not fun being old, Taako, and it’s not fun dying for a final time.”
Taako tapped his arm impatiently. “So? What’s your point?”
“Wh- What’s my point?” the Director repeated tiredly. She ran a wrinkled hand down her sagging face. “My point is that whatever you want to say to me, say it, because there is going to be a point where I’ll be gone, and you won’t be able to.”
Taako isn’t one for feelings. Never has been. For two centuries he hasn’t been, and he won’t be for as long as he lives. But when he thinks back to the day Magnus left for good, all he can do is remember how it felt. How it felt to lose someone important like that again. He’s lost Magnus before. He’s lost the Director. He’s lost Lup, in more ways than one. 
But there is nothing like the empty white walls of a hospital room. Being helpless as you watch a loved one slip through your fingers like water. The first time Taako was forced to face loss like that was when he and Lup were 75. The only difference is that they were alone. They held each other’s hands tightly, and Lup sobbed into his shoulder as strangers ushered them away from their aunt one last time. 
They didn’t want to be separated from each other like they had been from their aunt, so they ran.
Taako can’t run from this. He knows he can’t. Magnus is dead and he isn’t coming back, and he and Lup can’t run like they did when their ears were too big for their heads and their hearts were too big for the world. 
“Fuck, Luce!” Taako sobbed, wiping his face with the back of his hand. Lucretia just stared at him expectantly as he struggled to spit out his words.
“I know I fucked up, alright? But don’t pretend you didn’t either!” Taako snapped, jabbing a finger in her direction. She didn’t even blink. “You didn’t reach out once!”
“You know why,” Lucretia responded coolly, just as accusatory. The two of them stared at each other. Taako conceded and his shoulders slumped. Lucretia wheeled over and took Taako’s peticured hand in hers. For once, he didn’t fight her. Taako waited for her to say something, but she just gazed at him patiently.
“Fuck,” Taako emphasized again, this time with a laugh, his shoulders shaking. He pulled her into a tight hug.
“Oof, Taako, I’m ancient,” Lucretia laughed back, but reciprocated, nonetheless. 
“I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I’m sorry for… everything.”
“Hm? Sorry, I didn’t hear that. My old human ears. Was that… an apology?”
“Shut the fuck up. I’m trying to be heartfelt.”
The two stayed in silence for a little longer. Taako was the first to pull away.
“But, uh,” Taako began, “yeah. I’m, uh, sorry for… staying away. From you. Even after all this time.” He took a deep breath, gathering his thoughts, and Lucretia watched.
“I mean, I know it’s partly deserved, you know? That’s what I’ve been telling myself for 50 something years. That you… deserved the cold shoulder for this long. I mean, for anyone else, I probably would have given them the cold shoulder for longer. But then it… it really hit me. How fucking short human lives are,” Taako sniffed. He wiped his face again.
“It’s not fair that the babies of the family are the first to go. The rest of us are still kicking. Good lord, Luce, you look older than Merle, for Pan’s sake.” 
“You wound me, truly,” Lucretia said, voice flat. Taako forced a laugh.
“I think I... forgave you a while ago.” His brow furrowed, like that wasn’t how he wanted to say it. “Or, I don’t know, got over it at least. As much as Taako can get over something. I just… held out this long because of principle, you know? And by the time I was over it, I didn’t know how to… talk to you anymore. I told myself you deserved it because I didn’t want to admit to myself that I was wrong,” Taako admitted. He felt uncomfortable, suddenly, like something in him came undone and everything he has been holding inside for not even a quarter of his life came pouring out. Lucretia, however, held him steady, like his words were something she had been waiting for all of hers. She waited for him to say anything else, but when she seemed to realize he had finished, she let out a sigh. 
“Some things really don’t change,” she muttered, clearly intending for Taako to hear her. He smiled wearily. 
“Gotta stick to what the fans love, right?” he joked, and Lucretia smiled back tiredly. He felt his heart sting. Why did everything with humans change so fast?
It suddenly hit Taako that when he becomes a pile of bones, he won’t have Lucretia. Or Angus. He won’t even have Merle or the captain. They’ll be dead, long buried in the ground. It will just be him. And Lup and Barry, of course, since they’re reapers now, but they’ll still look exactly the same. Taako’s beauty will have long since withered while his twin will be as sharp as ever, and Barry… Well, Barry’s jeans will be as crisp as ever. And Kravitz… 
Taako jerked when Lucretia brought her hands to cup his face, but otherwise didn’t resist. This was really it, huh? The first and last time they’d ever have a heart-to-heart like this.
“I wish we had gotten more time together,” Lucretia professed, and Taako broke in her arms.
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thunderbottle · 10 months ago
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thank the earth and all the stars for trans lesbian sex
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just-a-silent-sorcerer · 8 months ago
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Was practicing poses but it turned into a desperate beg for certain demon cat to not kill him
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mosaickiwi · 3 months ago
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Patience
hi i really like this post so i wrote it!!! (my hobbies include robbing sai)
warning: Angel coming down from a panic/anxiety attack while Ren waits in da hallway. Also a little self loathing if u squint?
14 Days With You is an 18+ Yandere Visual Novel. MINORS DNI
💜🖤💜🖤💜🖤
The tightness in your chest was finally waning. You took a deep breath—the easiest one you'd had in what seemed like hours. 
It felt cold on the floor now. Or maybe it'd been like that since the moment you locked yourself in. But you were more aware of it, at least. You leaned back against the wall with a sigh, closing your puffy eyes. Though your hand trembled, you gently rapped your knuckles on the marble flooring.
A faint knock on the door to your right came in response.
[REDACTED] had been there the whole time while you cried. They never said a word, but always answered you in some form. I'm here.
Vulnerability was shameful according to the voice in your head. You were making gradual progress to get rid of that voice, to give yourself the grace you gave others to seek comfort when needed. And if he couldn't see you, letting it all out didn't feel so bad. All you needed was to know that they were close by.
You tried to speak and only managed to throw yourself into a coughing fit from how raw your throat was. Hunching over with your head on your knees, you could only wait until it was over. There were hurried footsteps from the other side of the door that you barely heard over the haggard sounds.
This time, they reached out first. It wasn't a knock like usual, but your phone vibrating atop the marble. You felt around on the floor until it was within your grasp. The simple message on screen turned clear as you gently wiped at your eyes, still blurry from earlier.
water?
Despite your exhaustion, you laughed, then silently winced at the slight pain it caused. Any help or care he could offer was always within seconds when it came to you. 
It took you a few measured breaths to gather yourself enough to unlock the door. Along with a thin line of light, a water bottle slid through the small gap, only the tips of his scarred fingers coming into view before they disappeared altogether. You opened the door a little wider and tilted your head to peek out at him.
His dark mess of hair greeted you, rather than his face. [REDACTED] was sitting on the floor, almost the same as you were minutes ago with his back to the wall, knees bent and arms crossed over them. They made sure to keep their head turned away. He knew you didn’t want anyone to see you like this.
You stretched out into the hallway to touch his shoulder. It was the only way you thought to offer some form of a thank you in the moment. Their muscles flexed and shifted under your fingers, but otherwise, they didn’t acknowledge you.
The room seemed stuffy now, so you kept the door open just a crack for a little fresh air. You scooted back to your place beside the door, then slowly drank the water in peaceful silence, the man that sat still as a statue within arms reach at the corner of your vision. Everything still ached in some way from the crying session. But it wasn’t as long as usual. You tapped on the floor and watched him.
Through the space no bigger than your pinky finger, you saw your partner immediately put one hand to the wall, and knock back.
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bloody-bonesaw · 6 months ago
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Heavy weapons guy turtleneck indulgence
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aviomons · 2 years ago
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i swear, i swear
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keiranandtheinkmachine · 11 days ago
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tweenre stimboard because I love stimboards raaaahhhh!!! (this one has current interests of mine in it ^^)
x/x/x
x/x/x
x/x/x
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fishyfarms · 1 year ago
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Harvey’s first visit to the farm.
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karda · 4 months ago
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fursonnaaaa yippee!
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cconfusedkat · 2 months ago
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HI I FINISHED THEM!!! I wanted to make a re do because of how Majorly different the last one was... I felt bored so I focused on this all day 🕺 adding color was really fun
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love0dragon · 22 days ago
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🩷He doesn't really like coffee..💜
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I have been kinda having art block lately and also wanting to draw my sona more so I decided to push through and made this! The composition is okay but I still had fun with it. I've wanted to draw my sona with the Smg4 cast for awhile but was kinda nervous to, but seeing others draw their OCS and sonas with the crew gave me the courage to try! Maybe even a little bit of self shipping here to be silly :3 either way I just love drawing wholesome stuff and I think my sona is cute and I love him 🩷🩷🩷
✨Please Don't Trace/Steal/Repost my Art or Designs✨
💕Fanart is always appreciated. Please keep it kind and appropriate, and tag me so I can see it!💕
❤️I Do Not Consent For My Art To Be Used In Any AI Programs❤️
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i care for you still and i will forever
It was the twins’ birthday, and Lup was tasked with cake-making duty. As far as Lucretia was privy to, Lup had been insistent that she would be the one to bake the cake.
“Sure, Lulu, you can bake a cake,” Lup had quoted to Lucretia in mock imitation of her brother, “but don’t blame me for not exactly trusting the baking skills of a person who had their hands off the baking sheet for ten years.”
It had gotten a soft laugh from Lucretia. Not the one Lup was used to— It wasn’t the full belly laughter that she had grown accustomed to during the hundred years they spent together. It was nothing like the times Taako made a quick quip and milk shot out of Lucy’s nose, or the times Merle said something particularly dumbfounded that had Luce doubling over in tears, or the times Magnus snuck up on her and shouted his name, pulling screams out of her that dissolved into laughter.
It was stifled, quiet, stilted. Like Madam Director was out of practice, as if laughing too hard was a risk. It reminded Lup just how much her family had changed without her.
Lup looked over to Lucretia, who was scrubbing at the same plate absentmindedly. Lucretia felt the dish be pulled out of her grasp with no resistance, and she looked up to face Lup.
“Are you okay, babe? You seemed to be preoccupied, there,” Lup said, sliding the plate into the drying rack. Lucretia looked back to the soapy water that sat still in the sink.
“Why did you ask me to come over?” she asked. Lup stared at her and then shook her head, eyebrow raised and a smile on her lips. She gestured emphatically to the ingredients laid out on the island.
“Uhhh, to bake a birthday cake? Come on, Creesh, don’t tell me your old age is affecting your memory!” she laughed, but Lucretia’s solemn expression didn’t change and her gaze didn’t leave the water.
“I’m being serious,” Lucretia said, her voice cool as she looked up to stare Lup in the eye. The smile on Lup’s face dropped and a serious expression overtook her features. She tapped her index finger against her arm as she thought about how she wanted to respond to that.
“Lucretia, why do you think I forgave you?” Lup finally asked. Lucretia’s eyes widened. It had been an unspoken rule that nobody in their family would talk about what Lucretia had done— not to pardon her, but because it was too sore of a spot to prod at.
“I… I don’t know,” Lucretia whispered. Lup closed her eyes and leaned against the counter.
“I didn’t have a reason to hate you, at first. When I woke up for the first time in that umbrella, I couldn’t feel anything. I didn’t know who I was or where I was or how I got there.”
Lucretia nodded along, her face frozen.
“The first thing I felt was loneliness. Crippling loneliness, for ten years. Taako won’t tell me how he found me, but I was in that cave for so long that I didn’t know how to feel relief. I wasn’t excited to be reunited with him, and I wasn’t mad it took him so long. All I wanted was to feel my brother again.”
Lucretia opened her mouth to say she’s sorry, she’s so sorry, it wasn’t supposed to be like this, but Lup held a hand up, face still pointed and emotionless.
“You know what I felt when I realized you were the reason he didn’t remember me? That you were why my brother didn’t snap me over his knee as soon as he got his hands on the Umbra Staff, why you were the reason I couldn’t talk to him or Magnus or Merle? That he didn’t recognize me, even when I burned my name into the wall?“
At first Lucretia didn’t answer, but Lup stared at her pointedly, as if waiting for a genuine answer.
“I don’t know,” Lucretia repeated, her arm still as her gaze fell to the floor. “I don’t, I really don’t. If I was in your place, I—“
“I felt nothing. I didn’t care, Luce.”
Lucretia looked back up to look at her, looking no less stunned than she has been.
“I missed you. I missed you, I missed Magnus, I missed Merle, I missed Davenport, I missed Barry, I—“ Lup’s voice grew shaky and she ran a hand down her face. “I didn’t fucking care what you did because I was alone for so long. I couldn’t be mad at you when I could barely remember your face.”
Lucretia didn’t know what to say to that, but Lup pulled her into an embrace. She held her close, fingers curling tightly and her nose pressed into Lucretia’s shoulder. Lucretia weakly raised her arms to reciprocate. They stood like that for what felt like a hundred years.
“…Taako doesn’t hate you, you know,” Lup finally said, pulling away. Lucretia shook her head, but Lup grabbed her by the shoulders.
“He doesn’t,” she said, shaking her to emphasize. “He may be mad, he may never forgive you, he may think he hates you and will never want you to be a permanent prescence in his life again, but one hundred fucking years aren’t nothing. For our entire lives together, no one stayed. It was just me and him. But the entire century we spent chasing the Light and hiding from the Hunger, that changed something in him. I know it did. I know my brother, Luce, and even if now he’s different and I don’t know him as well as I used to, he’s still my twin brother!
“That fucker can hold a grudge, yeah, and but he is also sensitive as all shit.” Lucretia stared at her and sighed heavily, pulling Lup’s arms away and letting her shoulders slump.
“Alright, Lup, thank you,” Lucretia conceded, but Lup could tell that she still wasn’t convinced. Lup furrowed her eyebrows, contemplating whether or not to push, before letting go and shaking herself off. She clapped her hands together and grinned ear to ear.
“Alright, then. Are we baking this cake or what?” she exclaimed, and the woman in front of her seemed a little more familiar.
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messyvanity92 · 9 months ago
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Law x Reader with Migraines
I imagine your shared room to be dark, quiet, and cool.  nice bed, sheets and blankets
Over the time he starts to notice changes before a migraines and learns your triggers
Goes to a different part of the ship to study while you lay down to rest when you need to
Peeks time to time to see if you need something
Gives you water and some snack if you been resting for a while
If it helps, he gives you a head massage 
As I said before i don’t think he uses things with strong scents, so you don’t have to worry about a headache when he goes to bed
comforts you if you’re disappointed that you two had plans together but canceled
Kisses your temple when he passed by and you’re asleep
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thetwilightroadtonightfall · 5 months ago
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A Union Without Unions
Summary: It’s a joyous day in the history of Scala ad Caelum—Ephemer is getting married! But with his most dearest friends markedly absent, he has a lot of wedding blues to sort through.
(One-shot. Continuation/sequel to Objects of Affection & Part III of Overmorrow: The Founder’s Story series)
Read here
Dropbox folder (view after reading!)
Start at the beginning
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averlym · 1 year ago
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ghostwriter (their grandma would tell them she'd lose half her soul)
#or smth smth. having a lot of Thoughts. anyways here's the piece i've been working on and sometimes u have to just say Done#there's a lot of thinks but i am maybe a bit tired and so tmr i'll come in and add all the Tags that i'd personally want to get from myself#maybe i'll reblog the extras tmr too. this is an incredibly self indulgent piece + it probably deserves a tag ramble essay or smth#ig for now we see how it stands for itself + in the meantime:#adamandi#beatrix valeria campbell#hello!! i'm back with belated tags yippee!! alright so for funsies i'm going to make it sound like i'm going bonkers over this :3#the eye shine... the glowy eye... it's like phaethon shine but also smth about eyes to windows to the soul and like#there's two beatrixes here! half the soul. lost part doing things specific to the phaethon and here it's portrayed as tearing off her name#because that's really; truly; when it all starts!! also notable for the ghostly beatrix is i did it more painterly and cloaked in shadow and#fading into the bg. i think i was super duper specificish about where the glow comes from! front lighting back lighting beloved!!! like help#let's put it this way- beatrix face always glowy. important parts of paper also glowy. it's just that different elements are turned away#from the viewer by each beatrix!! also also. let's talk about the very gently implied blood and red etcetera#like the red string is canonical and i love personally the whole red strings of fate thing even though it's not Here Applicable exactly but#that definitely was an influence! and also the blood in the bg... i'm starting to think this is a recurring trend. but anyway shadowy bea#the other strings hang while the red string loops!! so like that one string feels almost alive. it's a sort of whimsical i put on the same#as metaphorical glowy eye!! also also the eye is lowkey influenced by the whole idea of Eyes and Spotlights within the show and also glow#as in power as in heyyy you ever think about writing as a visual medium huh#speaking of writing!! there is no beatrix thingy complete in my head without text sorrry but the black text overlays are always so >>> to me#and in the sense of art styles and overlays shoutout to all the black crosshatching outline thingys because For Some Reason in my mind#of all the characters beatrix feels like the bnw ink printed illustrations you get in books idk#fun fact! i spent so long rendering this and that was fine i liked it! but then trying to figure out text to go on the papers was a Thing#i tried to do. but then gave up on! sometimes i have to pick my battles and graphic design is indubitably Not my passion bc Fonts#fun facts about this is i Actually did start with a quick sketch in mind and there's been so many changed elements. in the og the front#paper for instance had 'ardess murders' written on it and the back one said phaethon interviews.. i like the nominee list better it feels#more narrative-esque and less passive than her just holding her writing.! other elements that got discontinued were that#front beatrix was supposed to blur into the other ghostly beatrix but i couldn't do it without sacrificing clarity so... no... no blurry#oh and the red string morphing at the ends to smth more abstract was always there from the start!! og had more floating papers#and also a silhouette of vincent and a scalpel bc 'one who pulls the strings' but that (pun intended)! got cut (hahahahahahaha) (sorry)#used also to be a lot of print room clutter but that got cut to bc compositionally i made beatrix larger (learned lesson from last art)
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misiahasahardname · 3 months ago
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the public said i should draw myself something self indulgent so here it is!
came out kinda ass but hey, the point wasn’t for it to look good. this is kinda like a birthday present for myself :]
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