#Schizokristoph | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

schizokristoph · 8 days ago

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Vent post; potentially triggering material may be relevant in this post.

Including Mentions of weight loss.

Mentions of pills.

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general yammering.

Hey guys I'll be back to posting soon. Sorry I died. Been offline due to mental health issues. I mean, they do call me schizokristoph for a reason, haha.

(I am not actually schizophrenic, but I am severely mentally ill.)

Lil vent; I used to have to go to the hospital a lot. Almost twice every month last year alone, due to my deteriorating mental health, I had lost a lot of weight, and I was in consistent pain. I was put on pills that didn't help me, I sunk lower, and I lost more weight.

Although I eventually got the correct medication to help me, recently, after struggling to stay on my medication on a regular basis, and falling and rising. I've managed to consistently stay on my medications, yet. They don't seem to be helping me anymore.

And due to my low moods, I am feeling more and more withdrawn. Especially in this community now (mostly on the discord AA community). I'm worried that I come across as too erratic and immature, and I fear that it's driving people away from me. I'm not very good at holding conversations anymore, as I don't feel like I'm wanted. I have a huge issue with neglect, I don't like being alone. Or being left alone to my own devices. I'm in all actuality, terrified of it, to the point it even puts me in a completely different state of mind. I get more alert, and hyper-aware, due to all this alarm and nothing to pin it on, I hullicnate. And it's been getting worse and worse as my health depletes.

Thank you for listening

- Kris.

Vent over -- Updates on WIPs

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On a lighter note, I may post some art soon when the confidence sparks up.

The next episode of Law Sugar Lawyers is going to take a long while, and art mediums may be switched, as my hand was cramped after 3 days of mindlessly dragging a mouse around. I'm sorry but MS paint it killing my hand. It will most likely continue on ibis paint. And, I'm thinking of trying more stylistic styles, as I think mis-matched frames will make it more interesting; Especially from a style perspective.

I have also worked on a lot more art lately. Will post when I find the time.

-Kris.

(PS. i like to end my writing off, with my name, because I am a little freakazoid.)

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