#Sascha is just a Little Boy still…

[superfluffychickens]

Where there’s Teenagers, there’s Drama! AKA, everyone bullies Sascha and Pluto has no rizz

[mosswolf]

reading summary - march

vespertine, by margaret rogerson: i really enjoyed this one, YA but no romance, about a horrible fucked up little death nun who gets possessed by a bitchy ghost and becomes a joan of arc figure in a fantasy french setting. whats not to like really

river of teeth, by sarah gailey: this one's like alternate history lousiana, usa, with hippo cowboys. the concept fucks, but i was definitely hoping for more mystery than this novella had, possibly due to it being a novella? but if you like fantasy cowboys u gotta check this one out

sword, stone, table: old legends, new voices, edited by jenn northington and swapna krishna: LOVED this anthology, lots of really interesting retellings of arthuriana. my favourite was flat white by jessica plummer which is about elaine who works at a coffeeshop and gets tangled up with regular customers lancelot/arthur/guinevere in a messy codependant poly situation and i genuinely think about it such a lot. really really well written,,,

lorehaven bound by joy demorra: love ursula cant wait to see more ursula!!

the starfang trilogy by joy chng: hugely let down by these. theyre about werewolf clans in space which sounds great but they were super nothingy when it came to the main plot, had a really random cousin incest thing and a really weird attitude towards drug addiction? finished the trilogy because theyre all really short and feel super incomplete alone, but man. what a disappointment

clockwork boys & the wonder engine by t kingfisher: these were really fun, you can definitely tell that theyre earlier books than the saint of steel series but still lots to enjoy. the end of wonder engine had me screeching

swordheart by t kingfisher: wasnt as immediately engaged with this one because theres no paladins..... but i listened to this audiobook on a long coach ride basically all in one go and it was extremely solid in a very familiar and comforting way.

guides for dating vampires 0.5, 1, 1.1, 1.2, by d.n bryn: predictable in a very soothing way, loved vincent as a character

the dawnhounds, sascha stronach: very discworldy, but if discworld was biopunk and way more specifically about autonomy. i was also hoping for more of a mystery or central plot from this one, it felt quite scattered, but the concepts were super cool.

atomic awakening by james mahaffey: read this for uni, and it SUCKED. i always forget that people think that nuclear weapons are cool and that the usa is good. why.

gathering moss: a natural and cultural history of mosses by robin wall kimmerer: this was really interesting, and robin wall kimmerer reads her own audiobooks and her reading is super relaxing to listen to as well

consort of fire by kit rocha: this was about dragons and magic and poly romance and stuff but i dont know, i didnt really like it. just didnt really ever grab me despite the subject theoretically being exactly my thing

dirty strays 1 & 2 by riley nash: okay i picked these up because the description starts like this "We’re lost boys, wild and forgotten. Born into a world of poverty and crime, my two best friends and I have nothing to rely on except each other. But I have a plan: if I can film viral BDSM porn" and it carries on but THAT WAS SO HILARIOUS TO MEEEE LIKE BRO REALLY WENT THERE INSTANTLY. DIDNT CONSIDER ANYTHING ELSE FIRST. but yes theyre EXTREMELY horny and also i really liked them especially the first one. a fucked up family of fucked up people, semi verbal mc, they get a dog. really endearing in a strange kind of way

how to do nothing by jenny odell: this was okay, nothing lifechanging and i'd read a lot of the books that are quoted already, so i kind of felt i already got the gist

[gilsart]

Are there any books you can recommend about Friedrich? German or English would be nice.

By the way, your art is so damn cute and adorable!! I am always happy to see you on my dashboard, even if you're "just" answering questions as you seem really nice.

hi!! first of all thank you ,,, means a lot to me, i always re-read my answers to make sure i don't sound rude or anything 😭 anxiety girlies where you at

about the books, there are lots!! i recommend you also ask @kattestrophe - she knows more than i do, especially about the german books; i am neither german nor english so some of those i own aren't available in languages other than my own.

the ones from my collection that are available in english/german are:

frederick the great by william f. reddaway - this is a biography, available in english, i haven't read it all because i only needed the crown prince bit, and that one had historical inaccuracies, so be mindful. but it has images!!

king in prussia by rafael sabatini - this is fiction and also available in english! it's a book from 1944 i believe, divided in two parts, specifically before katte's death and after katte's death up until ... i think the end of the seven years war? i don't know, i haven't read it all and i will stop at katte's death. fritz is very gay in this one as far as i've read, but in a queer disney villain way, which can be fun if you decide to ignore the homophobia. also one of the protagonists is katte's entirely fictional jacobite cousin, the most annoying man on earth.

zeithain by michael roes - this also is fiction, and only available in german. i have only read five pages of it (my german is very poor) and it follows katte, not friedrich. katte is also very sad. but as far as i was told, both of them are gay, so there's that. so far hans is like "it's raining and i'm alone and last week i went to a funeral. i have prayed to the god i lost during my childhood", certainly something very different from how he behaves in king in prussia ...

katte: die geschichte einer freundschaft by gertrud von brockdorff - this is also german only, i'm not sure about the actual book being available (i was sent a pdf) although it could be available in germany?? it is pretty old tho (1934) so i wouldn't know much about that. this one is also more about katte and friedrich, again fiction, it's eight chapters, still haven't read it because this bad boy is written in fraktur and i have trouble reading that but i have had conversations about it, and boy is it queer. there is a single chapter in which katte has a small identity crisis and has a romance with wilhelmine, but after that he's back to longing for frédéric and his "wide, bright and impenetrable" eyes that bewitch everyone. fellas is it gay to think your male friend's eyes are what you need a woman to have so you can actually love her?

the sorrows of frederick by romulus linney - available in english, this is a play from 1966, still haven't read it (the package is somewhere in europe right now), i think it follows all of fritz's life? it has fredersdorf, at least. but fredersdorf here knows katte, so eh. some anachronistic thingies here and there, what's new.

der alte fritz in 50 bildern - i can't figure out the name of the authors (damn it, fraktur) but worry not: this only has somewhat cool illustrations about fritz's life and a little bit of german text. at least some of them are. others are peculiar: voltaire is shorter than fritz in these. he wishes. i'm adding a photo though, so you can see!

i also own a pretty interesting book, not about fritz but about the seven years war in general, titled "prussian army soldiers and the seven years' war: the psychology of honour" by katrin and sascha moebius (there is an umlaut on the o there; i'm writing this on my pc and don't know where to find it).

i also have "later selected poems" by sheenagh pugh, which contains "five voices", a cycle of five poems showing five different perspectives on katte, if you're interested in that. there isn't a fritz perspective, though.

he also has a short chapter in "bad gays" by huw lemmey and ben miller, but i found it to be somewhat offensive at some point, although that could be a translation issue: there is a pretty offensive slur and some things i found to be inaccurate. overall i wouldn't buy it. i only bought it because the italian edition has very cool illustrations, at a time where i did not know about this translation thing.

the rest of my books are all available in italian only (or about voltaire).

hope this was helpful!

[gaypiratepropaganda]

ok here are the most important ones (to me)

The Ballad of the Pirate Queens by Anne Yolen

this is a children's book in verse about Anne Bonny and Mary Read. responsible for my pirate obsession

Bloody Jack by LA Meyer

a young adult series about a girl who disguises herself as a boy, goes to sea, and becomes a pirate. these were the best thing ever invented to kid me but I haven't read them in a while so I don't know if they're actually like, good. I liked the atmosphere and the slightly antiquated way it was written. there are gay bits.

A General History of the Robberies and Murders of the most notorious Pyrates: From Their first Rise and Settlement in the Island of Providence to the present Time, with the remarkable Actions and Adventures of the two Female Pyrates Mary Read and Anne Bonny

or A General History of the Pyrates by "Captain Charles Johnson"

A good starting point. a lot of our pirate stories come from this book. it claims to be a true historical record, but I have my doubts. still fun though. I think this guy just wrote down every story he heard about pirates. it has illustrations.

Sodomy and the Pirate Tradition by B.R. Burg

not super historical but it doesn't really claim to be. basically it's just this guy going. "so... pirates fucked, right? like, there's no way they didn't." and then he's correct. I mainly wanted this book as a teenager because I loved the cover and the title but now it's in my brain forever. look at Blackbeard. look at his gay little pose

Pirate Enlightenment or The Real Libertalia by David Graeber

this is the one I'm reading right now and I love it so far. it's about pirates in Madagascar and the real-life version of the pirate utopia from general history of pyrates (it isn't real but it kind of is but not.) I like the writer, he's written other good things. he's obsessed with the enlightenment for some reason but you can easily ignore that.

On Stranger Tides by Tim Powers, which is kind of like a magical realism type thing. I think it's kind of what pirates of the Caribbean is based on. this is where I knew Stede Bonnet from

Liveship Traders by Robin Hobb, three books that are part of a fantasy series. these pirates are dicks to each other a lot but they are gay and their ships are alive.

Lost Boi by Sassafras Lowrey is a queer sort of modern version of Peter Pan. captain hook is in there and he's like a leather guy. not literally pirates, but still.

The Dawnhounds by Sascha Stronach is science fiction with queer pirates, a monkey god, and mushroom houses.

[virtuoshosh]

“More,” instructed Sascha, and their assistant obediently yanked on the cords of the piece of corsetry that was wrapped around the body of Cassius Halestorm; both the boy and Sascha’s assistant made grunting noises at the effort, but still the corset barely budged.

They’d been at this for nearly an hour.

They were in Sascha’s private atelier within the Haus of Holbein, where the vampire had called in their young client for a fitting. The newly-reunited band Cthulhu had had several consultations with Sascha since Shoshana had asked Sascha to be the band’s stylist, and the looks they had collectively come up with for all of the other band members were nearly complete, hanging on mannequins around the atelier; for Shosh, a slim-cut multi-paneled overcoat trimmed with black lace and velvet, made from reclaimed vintage upholstery fabric, that she could remove during a performance to reveal a bodysuit underneath, paired with her signature thigh-highs, of course. The wolf, Henrietta, had requested what was essentially a full-body harness, made of up intricate patterns of overlapping, woven straps and buckles (made of platinum and bronze, never silver), with utilitarian pockets and patches that could be removed, rearranged, and replaced with other attachables at her discretion. The new bassist had wanted elevated streetwear, with cargo pants and cropped jackets that flared and hugged in all the right places.

It was just Cassius who’d had trouble nailing down a design.

And it’s not as if Sascha was imposing this on the boy; it had been Cass who’d marked corsetry as something he wanted to try, when they’d all been given lookbooks to flip through for inspiration.

Sascha sighed, and pursed their lips; if you wanted something done right, oftentimes you had to do it yourself. “Leave us,” they said, not unkindly, to their assistant, who nodded with barely contained grateful relief before scurrying out of the workroom. 

Sascha glided across the room behind Cass and took the corset strings in hand, which caused the latter to tense up. “This isn’t going to work if you don’t relax…” Sascha chided, and caught Cass’ eye-roll reflected in the mirror. Gradually, with slow and painstaking patience (which, as an immortal creature, Sascha had plenty of), Sascha pulled on the laces, millimeter by millimeter, holding the strings taught. “…it would also help if you slowed down your pulse, stopped breathing so frequently.” As a dhampir, Cass didn’t have the luxury to stop breathing altogether, as full-blooded vampires did. But he didn’t need nearly as much oxygen and blood-flow as he seemed to be in the habit of using, and would function perfectly well on less with a little bit of discipline.

Which is one thing the boy seemed to be woefully lacking.

To make conversation, and to distract from the slow, vice-like tightening of the corset, Sascha said, “…Shoshana tells me you’re a relation of one of the rare Redlocke vampires—Verlie. Tell me—how is she faring, with her new role? I know she was resistant to being…how did she put it?—‘on fucking house arrest in this abysmal country.’” Sascha chuckled, and tightened, remembering the veritable tantrum the young Redlocke vampire had thrown when she’d appeared to plead her case before the Vampire High Council, her own family representing the opposition against her. That had been an interesting deliberation, to be sure.

@casshasfangs

[thebookbin]

I posted 115 times in 2022

That's 110 more posts than 2021!

51 posts created (44%)

64 posts reblogged (56%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@sarah-yyy

@thebackhill

@masaotheheckindog

@howlsmovinglibrary

@9ojos

I tagged 115 of my posts in 2022

#reblog - 63 posts

#fanart - 38 posts

#book review - 29 posts

#featured - 27 posts

#queer - 21 posts

#fandom: mdzs - 18 posts

#thots and feelings - 16 posts

#a good read - 13 posts

#five stars - 12 posts

#animorphs update - 12 posts

Longest Tag: 70 characters

#the best poetry for me captures an abstract but hyper-specific feeling

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

The Other World's Books Depend on the Bean Counter #1—Favorite Panels

And now for a new thing I'm trying: a section for my favorite panels!

You can check out my full review of the manga «here»

1. The one where a scab makes me feel bad for him

This man literally goes to a whole 'nother dimension and immediately wants to work. The most notable thing about him is the eye-bags and the crushed soul of a man under the boot of unfair labor practices.

══════════════════════════

2. The one where it's a tragedy how cute this man is

See the full post

10 notes - Posted August 30, 2022

#4

The Other World's Books Depend on the Bean Counter #2

Irodori Kazuki

Publisher: Yen Press Genre: isekai, fantasy, slice-of-life Year: 2022

Volume 1 «here»

This series is quickly becoming one of my favorites. It has all the things I love: an introspective story and the first stirrings of a found-family, a play on established genre themes and seemingly opposite people falling in love, and people forcibly taking care of an extremely competent man with only one braincell.

Seiichirou is such an interesting character because he's so underestimated. He's dedicated to work to the point that it's combined with his identity. Literally having sex and kissing another man all the time as a medical procedure is forcing him to confront life outside of work, but the idiot is clearly struggling. Watching him talk himself out of any sort of romantic feeling by saying "oh we're in a different world, things are probably different here" without any sort of examination of that presumption is hilarious.

Meanwhile, Captain Aresh is having Feelings™ watching this man overwork himself. First of all it is literally my favorite thing in the world when the grumpy one falls first. His heart is beating fast and he's like what?! This guy?! But then is creating meal and break schedules for this frail little man.

The play on familiar genre tropes also just scratches an itch deep in my brain. Seiichirou is not the Chosen One, he's just some rando who got caught up in this mess and is trying to live his life. Interestingly enough there is a Chosen One, a teenage girl, ,who fits the isekai trope, we just don't really pay much attention to her. But the way that Aresh is clearly physically superior: Captain of the Guard, and a magic-user to boot, when Seiichirou questions his knowledge of his own department, it leads to character growth for Aresh, who starts taking the paperwork aspect of his job seriously. The entire genre is generally framed around a completely regular person from our world getting transported to a magical world who has immense powers in this new world. But Seiichirou is just a regular guy in both worlds, his only "superpower" is his terrifying work-ethic, and yet, he is still the one teaching our otherworlders things about themselves. Also I just really love all of the people around him bullying him to be healthier.

storygraph | bookshop.org | local houston

★★★★★ opposites attract nerdy boi gay stars

Check out my favorite panels «here»

15 notes - Posted September 9, 2022

#3

The Dawnhounds

Sascha Stronach

Publisher: Gallery / Saga Press Genre: scifi Year: 2022

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*I received a free copy of this book from the publisher in exchange for an honest review*

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I just finished Dawnhounds by Sascha Stronach, a goblincore fungipunk Māori post-apocalyptic scifi(?) and it’s so unlinke anything I’ve ever read it’s hard to quantify. The story follows Yat Jyn-Hok, former street rat, current cop, very soon to be murdered. This is a post apocalyptic world where inorganic materials such as metal and plastic are shunned. The city is made of fungus—it’s alive. Doors can be regrown to the hinges, bodies can be modified to promote far-sightedness and gender modification, and the city reclaims the dead. But in this alive city, not everything is as it seems: extreme wealth disparity, a never ending war with a far-off island, and disappearing people.

When Yat is murdered, she is thrust into the dark underbelly of the city she thought she knew. She’s confronted with the dark reality that her indifference to the realities of the city and her role as a cop is just as cruel as the violence around her. Meanwhile, her aging partner, a smart man who’s seen too much, is trying to help her in the only way he knows how. And the Māori gods are calling her, tugging on the threads that keep her alive. The story is such a fantastical mix of everything. Such interesting world building, a mystery, the mythological elements bringing a touch of fantasy, and a woman trying to find her way in a society that doesn’t accept her.

The book does have extreme homophobia, but Yat does find a found-family in the form of a raging queer pirate crew that consists of a literal goddess of a captain, her trans wife (who has to shave because while she knows who she is she is also comfortable with her body as it is) a non-binary boatswain who plays a nose flute , and a chonky strong Tigress crew member who Yat is mysteriously drawn to. Such a fascinating read. I think I’ll want to read it again honestly. I think because I’m unfamiliar with a lot of the mythology and cadence I didn’t fully grasp the story the first time.

storygraph | bookshop.org | local houston

★★★★ sapphic fungipunk stars

19 notes - Posted August 16, 2022

#2

Bookish News You Need To Know

HarperCollins Publishing Union is on Strike NOW

Since July, HarperCollins workers have been bargaining with their corporation to receive fair wages, diversity commitments in the industry (which has remained 90% white), and for their right to collectively bargain. To stave off the strike HarperCollins agreed to come to the table, but refused to engage in good faith.

HarperCollins UAW 2110 has been on strike since 10 November.

How you can help:

All this information comes straight from the union. Visit their website for the most up-to-date information. Follow their lead when it comes to direct action!

Donate to the strike fund! You can use this link here or make our cheques to: ATTN Lynne Weir Region 9A UAW 111 Founders Plaza, 17th floor East Hartford, CT 06108 "HarperCollins" on the memo line

Bring supplies to the picket line Email dm @hcpunion on instagram to see what they need right now. But in general things that would be helpful are: lunch, gluten-free and vegan options, hand-warmers, and scarves.

Don't boycott HarperCollins titles The union is asking you not to boycott, because they still support their authors and want them to succeed. Improved conditions for HarperCollins workers means improved conditions for HarperCollins authors.

Contact HarperCollins and share the news Your support for the union should be addressed to peopleteam@harpercollins.com and brian.murray@harpercollins.com

If you're near NYC, join the picket line 195 Broadway, New York, NY 10007

DO NOT REVIEW HARPERCOLLINS BOOKS UNTIL THEY PROVIDE FAIR CONTRACTS TO THEIR EMPLOYEES. And if they are nominated for any awards like the GoodReads Choice Awards withhold your vote on HarperCollins titles.

Reblog this post This isn't part of the official union instructions, but it would really help spread the word around the tumblr book community.

Sources: HCP Union social medias: Twitter Instagram The Citizen's Guide to Following the Money and Holding the Powerful Accountable free ebook PDF MorePerfectUnion @harpercollins

47 notes - Posted December 2, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Animorphs #33: The Illusion

So already the children are commenting how Jake “looks like an old man.” And the decisions he's making are acknowledged as horrifying but necessary. BUT THEN THERE'S THIS QUOTE: “It felt good to hear Jake say I was indispensable. But with Jake you could never tell anymore what was sincere, and what was just expedient. He’d been the most open of guys, back in the old days. What you saw with Jake was what you got. But he’d been a leader for a long time now. He’d learned to say what he needed to say. Jake NEEDED me as one of the Animorphs. He liked me, respected me, was happy for me when I was happy—and when he had to he used me without regard for anything but winning.”

What the actual fuck.

50 notes - Posted August 27, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[wildestaugust]

Don’t You • C.L

Summary: charles sees his ex-girlfriend months after breaking up.

Author: what watching ‘scenes from a marriage’ and listening to taylor swift and adele does to me.

Warnings: smut, angst, nsfw content, +18, unprotected sex.

Part 2

For the first time in six months, after breaking up with Charles, she was attending an F1 grand prix. Sascha, one of her closest friend, had invited her to the paddock club at Sochi for the russian grand prix. Sascha had gotten the tickets almost eight months prior to the race, so when she found out her friend and the ferrari driver broke up, she was unsure if the plan to go with her was still a possibility.

While it wasn't exactly what she had hoped for in the first week she was spending in Russia, she had no heart to tell her not to go, Sascha was extremely excited to finally attend her home grand prix and, while she wasn't totally ready to be at the same place as Charles, she could bear two hours at the Sochi Autodrom.

"Honestly, if you don't want to go it's okay, I'll just tell my cousin to take the tickets." Sascha said before leaving to the airport.

"It's fine. I'll be okay, besides, I already packed my suitcase!" She joked. "You have had those tickets for months! My love life won't affect your plan." A smile grew on her face as she assured her friend there was no problem.

She had met Charles through her cousin who introduced them during the new year's eve in monaco when they were just seventeen, however, he didn't formally asked her to be his girlfriend until her eighteenth birthday for which he threw her a surprise party with their closest friends and family. Charles was her first everything, first kiss, the first boy she formally introduced to her family as her boyfriend and, on the intimate side, her first time. Overall, they went through the process of experiencing the transition of adulthood together as they moved in to his penthouse when they were only twenty one.

It had been a solid relationship of a little over four years and she was extremely proud to see his growth in motorsport as she had been there since his first race in Formula 3 and then, during the australian grand prix where he debuted in Formula 1. It made her the happiest girl to watch him achieve his dream and doing it while she was by his side.

She was there to help him grieve the death of his godfather and, he cried on her arms as he heard his father's last heartbeat. Both of them had gone through a lot over those years and they had found a lot of happiness when he finally reached his dream of signing with Ferrari, being one of the youngest driver to do so. He had made her a promise that he was going to sign with them in honor of his father and godfather and, once he finally got the news he had a Ferrari seat for the next season, he went with her to his father's gravestone to just spend that afternoon sitting there, comforting him on one of his most vulnerable moments.

As all good things in life come to an end so did their relationship back in march, just before the start of the season. Over the months ahead of the break up, they had started to spend less time together, with Charles being constantly away. It was hard to get a week for themselves when she was also studying part time at The Sorbonne in Paris which meant weekly flights back and forth to Monaco. As much as her feelings hadn't change, there was no point on staying in, what felt to her, a one-sided relationship with how difficult it had become to enjoy it.

The break up was hard for both of them. The first month Charles tried, unsuccessfully, to reach out to her through each and everyone of their friends, also, it got to a point where it was almost unbearable to go on a run around monaco without thinking of him. It was her mom who suggested her to stay in Paris where she would be far away of everything that could remind her of him.

A smile filled with nostalgia formed on her lips as she walked to their seats. Attending races had become such a normal thing to do and suddenly, once she broke up with Charles, it was almost impossible for her to watch the races without feeling sad, however, after months, attending that race was cathartic, as if she had finally let go of something.

"We've got nice seats!" Sascha happily said taking a picture.

"Yeah, these are awesome. I used to watch the races from the paddock so this is actually the first time I'll be watching from this angle!" She commented.

"Well, I think this view is way better, besides, there are no sweaty men around you!" Sascha joked. "I shouldn't bring this up, but you already know me... How do you feel right now?"

"This is strange, I think if you would've brought me here four months ago I wouldn't be able to stay longer than five minutes without crying." she replied truthfully. "Now, all these months after, I feel more mentally strong to be seating here, knowing very well he's somewhere around us."

"I'm glad to hear that but, do you feel that you've moved on completely?" That was a question she wasn't expecting at all.

Before answering, as if the universe was trying to help her, their surroundings erupted in cheers as it was announced that the race was about to start. The cars had done the formation lap and, for what she had heard, Charles was starting the race almost at the back of the grid in nineteenth place due to an engine penalty for which she hoped he could finish somewhere in the top ten.

"Why don't we watch the race and afterwards we have a proper chat?" Sascha's full attention was on the cars. Her friend understood her excitement, back in 2018 she almost bursted in tears when she saw Charles on his first grand prix, definitely there was something about those races that caused such an euphoric feeling.

Ferrari was leading with Sainz but, her focus was on the other Ferrari that had managed to gain seven places. The race itself was filled with a lot of action and suspense which surprised her considering Sochi was one of her least favorite circuits due to the lack of excitement over the years.

"Oh! that was close." Sascha expressed as the screen showed lance stroll almost colliding with his teammate.

"I know! Besides, it's Seb, how dare he?" She replied. Sebastian Vettel was one of her favorite drivers and, while he was still at Ferrari, Charles used to tease her for being such a fan girl.

During the next laps there wasn't a major change, Norris was still leading, however, during the closing laps it started raining —which many thought was unlikely after a dry start— for which most drivers started to pit. Luckily for them, their seats weren't exposed to the rain but the people on the other side of the track were quick to open their umbrellas as the rain got heavier.

Her heart almost dropped as she saw how Charles struggled with the car in the heavy rain, he was having an amazing race coming from nineteenth all the way to fourth place, but what happened next was unfortunate as he went off the track due to a struggle with the car since he hadn't pitted.

"Oh... wow." Sascha gasped as they showed the replay.

"So unfortunate." She commented.

In what was a dramatic ending with Norris going off the track as well, Hamilton ended up winning his one hundredth Grand Prix while Charles finished fifteenth. He did an awesome race until that very unfortunate moment on the last three laps, and she knew Charles very well to know that, more than disappointed, he was pissed for that mistake.

They left their seats and walked closer to where the trophy ceremony was taking place. It had been a crazy race considering also that Verstappen had started a place behind Charles and he ended up in second place after Norris' mistake.

"One hundred wins... that's insane!" her friend said while taking pictures as Hamilton was handed his trophy.

"Yeah... incredible." She said speechless, knowing they were witnessing history being made.

After the celebrations they immediately tried to exit the circuit since the traffic would be too long if they chose to stay longer. Before leaving, Sascha made sure to snap a selfie of themselves in front of the podium.

"This was so fun, I wonder why I didn't accept your other invites after Monza in 2019." the russian said making a sad face.

"I don't know, maybe you appreciate it more now that you're a ricciardo fan!" She teased smiling.

As they finally decided to walk out of the place, she took a quick glance around, she didn't want to see him, however, there was no denying that there was still that feeling of sadness whenever a race didn't go as planned and that race genuinely was very upsetting for her since she knew how much pressure he usually put on himself. All she could hope for was for him to get properly comforted that day.

At the Ferrari garage, Charles was still furious at himself for the mistake in lap fifty that had made him drop eleven places, from fourth all the way to fifteenth.

"I'm going for a walk, guys." He said to his team as he walked out.

The last few months had been frustrating, every time he was about to get a fantastic result something would come at the very last minute that ultimately fucked his race.

It was in those moments that he missed her, she knew how to properly make him feel good after a shitty race. The memories with his ex-girlfriend started flooding his mind, she was always the first one to arrive and the last one to go at the start of his Formula 3 career. She was his everything from the first time they kissed back when they were just teenagers, no one would've foreshadowed what would they become once they grew up.

His favorite memory with her was after his win in Monza, she waited for him in his motorhome after the multiple interviews he did on the circuit and, as soon as they kissed, they ended up making love there without anyone noticing it. Now, there he was, pissed at himself with no one to go home to. He walked around the garages for a while, thinking about everything that had happened on the last two races and, suddenly, as he looked around, his eyes fell on two brunette girls that were taking selfies near the podium.

He recognized the one in the red coat and, without realizing it, he had a grin on his face while looking at her. The last time they saw each other was a week after they broke up when she went to the penthouse to take her things, that was exactly six months ago.

He knew someday they would just casually see each other, however, a formula 1 grand prix was at the bottom of the list of the places where that could happen. Even if he wanted, he couldn't stop staring, it had been a long time since he saw her that close.

The Monégasque started to walk towards them as they made their way to leave the circuit, even though he didn't have his credential with him and would most likely be in trouble once he tried to go back to the paddock without it. His mind was all over the place, he couldn't come up with anything to tell her, he was completely overwhelmed as he remembered just how bad it ended between them.

Just before walking out to the parking lot where they already were, he made up his mind and tried to calm himself even though it would be hard not to kiss her. He made his way to approach her and, just as he was about to tap her shoulder, she turned around. She thought her eyes were betraying her, there was no way he was there. He was still on his red race suit that ironically matched with her coat, his hair was a bit messy probably due to the balaclava and helmet he wore for almost two hours, nonetheless, he was looking the same he always did.

"I knew I'd run into you somewhere." he said.

"...Charles." She was ecstatic.

"How have you been?" He replied smiling, not sure if he had the right words to say.

"All good... Do you remember Sascha?" Charles glanced to the other brunette who stood next to her.

"Of course, long time no see!" He met Sascha at her house back when they were just friends, a few months before her eighteenth birthday.

"Nice to see you, Charles." Sascha replied giving him a short hug. "I'll start the car, you guys can talk if you want." the russian had just broken the ice between the two as she got inside the car.

None of them knew what to do, they were both speechless after months without knowing anything about the other and suddenly, in the gray weather of Russia, they faced each other once again.

"Well, if we're going to be like this I suggest we open an umbrella in case of rain!" She joked. "I'm sorry for today's race, by the way."

"It was shitty but, it isn't the end of the world, hopefully in turkey I can get a much better result." he replied. "I'm surprised to see you here."

"I went to Moscow to visit Sascha and she had the tickets! It's weird coming back to these races, I think my last one was Abu Dhabi." she explained.

"Well, I hope I'm still your favorite driver." he said smiling.

"You made me fell in love with the sport so yeah, definitely." She laughed.

"Are you doing something tonight?" he questioned in the hopes that he could invite her to his hotel where they could talk more calmly.

"We're going to eat and then back to the hotel since we leave to Moscow tomorrow morning."

"Can I pick you up at your hotel? I'd love to have a proper chat." Charles suggested.

"Fine... do you still have my number?" she asked. It felt weird asking that to someone with whom she experienced her most vulnerable moments, as if he was a stranger. "If you do, just text me in an hour and I'll send you my location." For the first time in months, they hugged.

"Bye, guess I'll see you later..." She needed to get inside the car as fast as she could, it was overwhelming everything that happened in the last ten minutes, definitely hugging Charles wasn't what she expected.

Charles stood there with just one thought in his mind, he wanted his girlfriend back.

Her hotel was just ten minutes away from his. How ironic it was that all that time they were just a couple of streets away from each other. The last time he felt extremely nervous was on their first date, which he remembered it all too well, that was the day they kissed for the first time and it was a moment Charles had treasured during all those years.

He smiled as he spotted the brunette exiting the lobby, she had a slight outfit change, choosing a beige oversized coat with a short white dress. Charles got out of the car as she approached him.

"I hope we're going to an indoor place because the temperature is killing me!" she said.

Charles hugged her once she was close enough. He could smell his favorite perfume of hers —Dior's Miss Dior— as he embraced her on his arms, no one could understand how much he hoped to have her that close to him once again.

"You look very pretty, ma jolie." those last words slipped out of his lips unintentionally, he just said what he had on his mind.

She didn't say a single word as she got inside the car, dismissing him completely. Him calling her that, after a long time, set her mind back to all those romantic moments they spent during their relationship, Charles always found a way to make her feel special and he was the only person that had called her that, that's why those words had such an effect on her, because they had built a secret language, one only they understood, and once everything crumbled, it unintentionally damaged both as no one else understood each other like them. 

"My hotel is a few blocks down!" he said as they got inside the car. "I want to drink a glass of wine, it's all I need after this afternoon's disaster."

"Well, to me, you did great. You will get what you deserve." She smiled. It genuinely hurt deep inside of her seeing him struggle, while she wasn't following that season at all, it was always those last minute issues that affected his race and it was obvious to her that it frustrated him.

It didn't matter if they were no longer romantically involved, before he became her boyfriend he was her friend and nothing would ever stop her from caring about him nor believing he could get that championship, she was certain his time was coming.

"I hope so..." As he drove, the only thing heard inside the car was the radio playing Adele's When We Were Young.

How ironic, she thought with a grin on her face.

Nothing else was said, while she felt comfortable being there with him —otherwise she would've just told him 'no'—, it was extremely hard to think what would they possibly say to each other, they never discussed properly anything about the break up, essentially she just broke up with him and a week later she went to the penthouse to pick up the rest of her stuff without actually acknowledging him.

Did they need to discuss their break up? She didn't think it was necessary, in her mind Charles clearly needed to focus on his career and having a relationship at the same time didn't work out as they initially thought it would, to her, it was clear from the day she took that decision that it was best for both of them, however, she knew Charles did wanted to speak about it, otherwise he wouldn't had asked her to go out that night.

The minutes went by and they were getting out of the car to walk towards the hotel lobby. Charles suggested to get a drink at the bar which she agreed to as long as he didn't get wasted, to which he simply accepted since it was rare for him to get drunk after those last four months or so.

"When are you leaving?" she asked curiously.

"Tomorrow morning, I'll go back to Maranello for the next two weeks before the Turkish race." he explained as they walked in the bar.

"Oh, then I don't think you should drink tonight, what if you miss your flight?" she replied.

"Come on, you already know I've got plenty of alarms." Charles laughed as they sat on a table. One of the waiters approached them and they quickly decided on ordering two glasses of wine. "So... how have you been these months?" Charles needed to break the ice somehow, besides, as much as he tried to talk to her friends, he wasn't aware of if she was seeing someone else.

"I've been in Paris, I'm still deciding if I love it enough to move there full time." she explained. Paris became her safe place after leaving Monaco. "You?"

"Between Monaco and Maranello. To be honest I barely go to Monaco nowadays, I rather have my family visit me in Italy." After she moved out of his place it was almost unbearable to stay there without thought of her invading his mind.

He started spending more time in Maranello, immersing himself with his work at Ferrari and spending as much time as possible with the engineers discussing about the car and the improvements they could do during the season. The more time he spent in Italy, the less he'd think about her, or so he thought.

"I thought you said you'd never leave Monaco." She asked.

"It's a bit hard to go back there since I really don't have anyone to go home with." Charles' words slipped out of his mouth filled with self-pity.

The waiter came with their drinks and once he was gone, she turned to face Charles again. What could she say to that?

"I think we both have a little blame for that." She said taking a long sip of her wine.

"I don't want to play the victim card but, was this my fault?" He asked.

"I think it wasn't healthy for us anymore, we couldn't even allow us, at least, a month together. I know I should've mentioned it way before but, I didn't want to face reality because in my mind I wanted it to work out and, eventually, it didn't." She tried hard. Every time she could skip college just to be with him felt like heaven.

"And who says it can't? As far as i'm concerned we're still alive." she let out a chuckle.

"Charles, we will hate each other. If we can't be together at this moment, imagine what it would be in the next three years when your career becomes bigger." He could call her selfish but, her love for him was such that she couldn't allow herself to hate him and, in order to stay true to herself, she had to let him go, even if that destroyed her momentarily.

"I would never hate you, for god's sake! Are you listening to yourself?" he reproached.

"How can you discuss what you can't find words for?" She said without showing any emotions in her face, barely feeling anything. Without realizing it she had finished her glass in three sips. "I'm sorry, Charles. I wish you all the best but, I won't let us destroy each other by being selfish."

As she got up, before even walking out, Charles was quicker and, without any warning, he kissed her on the lips while his arms wrapped her waist. He needed to feel his lips on hers once again, even if it was only for one last time.

"Don't you realize what you mean to me?" He said pressing his forehead against hers once she pulled out of the kiss.

It took her a few seconds until she eventually kissed him back. Her own thinking betrayed her as she found herself immersed on his touch, it was like all she had said previously was thrown out as soon as their lips found each other.

"Take me to your room before I run away, please." She breathlessly said.

She hated how much she didn't hate him, not even a little. Letting go of Charles meant losing the love of her life but, she had to do it, otherwise she feared they would've become joyless, monotonous, and slowly unbearable to each other as the affection drifted away due to each other's responsibilities which kept them physically apart. She had seen many films and read many books, and if there was something that scared, it definitely was mirroring some of her favorite films like Blue Valentine or Sally Rooney's best-selling book, Normal People which she had read a few months before breaking up.

She was a masochist for being once again on his arms,

longing to devour his lips as soon as they were inside his room. Her issue was that she thought it would be easy to just walk away from him yet, it took everything in her to just spit those words out of her mouth.

"I missed you, mon amour." he said pinning her on the wall as soon as he closed his room's door. His mouth was on her neck while his hands trailed all the way to her bum, squeezing it gently.

"Me too, mon cœur." She moaned.

Charles lead her to his bed so she could be more comfortable. His eyes were filled with lust as he got on top of her to kiss her lips once more while his hands lifted up her dress, desperately trying to take off her underwear. He couldn't remember a time when they weren't like that, devouring each other's mouth, clearly, their sex drive was high and all those months apart were showing as none of them couldn't keep their hands to themselves.

Once he threw her underwear to the floor, he pulled her legs apart and, without any warning, he sank in between them. A muffled moan escaped her lips as his tongue deepened in her. Charles knew how much she loved it every time he went down on her.

"Fuck, I needed this." she whimpered.

He easily found her clit and, wasting no time, he sucked it, quickly driving her over the edge. He knew exactly how to push her buttons, many morning he had woken her up with his mouth between her legs, sucking her until she begged to have him inside of her.

"Has anyone ever make you feel like this, ma jolie?" He was sick for even asking the question.

"It has always been you, only you." She said before letting out a loud moan.

His grip tightened on her thighs as he relentlessly sucked her, swirling around her clit, while her moans and whimpers became more frequent as his tongue delved into her mercilessly. Charles could feel she was close to coming undone, however, he couldn't allow the show to end that shortly.

"I'm close, please..." His intuition didn't betray him, she was already begging. Truth was, she couldn't hold it anymore, she desperately needed to come undone on him.

"Don't even think about it." he warned.

"Charles, I can't; please." Her back was completely arched as she struggled to even let out her words. He slapped her bum making her clench at his touch.

He wasn't letting her come, instead, he chose to tease her further, however, while she kept approaching her high, he suddenly stopped, sending a wave of rage down her body.

"Why? No! " She cried out just as he denied her of an orgasm.

"You're impatient, mon amour, I had to do something about it." He cockily said slapping her thigh.

"I want you to fuck me, don't do this to me." she breathlessly begged.

He loved hearing how desperate she was to have him inside of her, so much, it even brought a smirk on his face. He was going to completely satisfy all her needs but, he loved taking his time just tease her properly.

"I will, princess." He smiled. "I want you on top of me."

She did as she was told and, before moving on top of him, she quickly tossed her dress on the floor while he desperately took off his pants, however, before taking off his underwear, she placed her hand on his bulge, stroking it softly as he groaned at her touch.

"You look so fucking beautiful." He said as she got on top of him. His favorite position was definitely that one, nothing turned him more than having her on all her glory in front of him.

She lowered herself down on him, letting out a moan as she did so. "Fuck, this feels too good." Charles hands held a tight grip on her hips as she softly began to ride him as she had done many times.

"Don't stop, mon amour." He encouraged as she increased her pace.

He was hypnotized by her movements, her body felt just right on top of his. He let out a few groans as he enjoyed the view of her just endlessly riding him, he was making sure to picture that moment on his mind so he could never forget it.

"You make me feel so good, don't you see? don't you see how good we make each other feel?" he said trying to catch his breath.

"Yes... we do." At that point the room was filled with their moans. She leaned forward to kiss him, with their tongues fighting each other as she kept relentlessly bouncing on top of him.

She couldn't see herself with anyone else and she hated to realize it. He was like a magnetic force that kept pushing her closer and closer to him. He knew all her spots, her weaknesses, what drove her mad, what she enjoyed. It pained her to feel so attached to someone, Charles had become her temple and, she had built her walls around him that, went it all crumbled. She was left confused because she didn't know what was life without being by his side.

"I can't hold it anymore." she whimpered as her hands gripped intensely on his shoulder.

"Me neither, fuck." Just as those those words left his lips, in absolute synchrony, they came on each other, letting out loud moans while he slapped her bum once more. She collapsed on his chest while his arms wrapped her waist. All that could be heard in that moment were their heavy breathing while the exhaustion started kicking in.

Charles softly stroked her hair while his eyes focused on her. He was scared of what was in store for them, their future uncertain after everything that was said previously, however, if that was their last night together, he wanted to make sure his eyes pictured every inch of her just so he could engrave that moment forever in his mind.

"I’m afraid I’ll never love again, not like this." She said holding back her tears while her lips kissed his chest.

"We’ll never love the way we loved each other, that’s a fact." Charles replied staring at her, catching another glimpse of her eyes before falling asleep, knowing very well that was going to be the last time he’d ever have her that close to him.

[flodaya]

why is Nora so popular with most of the fandom? (I've not really watched new gen so far. I just remember people being annoyed it started with a white girl as the main)

oh god yeah i remember how disappointed i was at first and now nora has grown on me so much, turns out nora is genuinely a really well-written character and mina plays her really well and charismatically. i feel like yeah it would have totally sucked if nora was surrounded by just another group of white friends and one token poc but in the new gen's case (at least the people raquel cast) it feels more like token white people, like every white person is white for a reason (consti bc he is a white boy asshole, zoe and nora because they're kiki's sisters, mailin because of a s6 storyline) and not the other way around, like the default was casting poc instead of white people

but back to nora: i think what i, as someone who has watched and loved the og druck and skam, thought was super interesting about nora is that she was a hybrid of kiki and an Even version but in a way that felt super realistic and natural and not forced, like she was kiki's sister and you could tell they had a similar childhood, they both tend to be emotional and blunt and opinionated but while kiki came off as insecure nora is quite self-assured and a little more cocky (her Even traits). she is extremely loyal and kind, the way she so quickly became friends with ava, fatou and mailin was really amazing to see, like watching these girls start to fall in platonic love really made me love nora a lot because you could see how fast she was able to care so deeply for her new friends. yet she isn't like i'm sorry to say it eg. sascha who comes off as a very cardbox perfectly kind pushover character, like i said nora is opinionated, she can - again reminder of kiki - put her foot in her mouth a lot, she can be selfish and petty especially with zoe, she has flaws but all of them are believable and none of them made her unlikable overall

and i guess another reason is her story was written absolutely wonderfully, i don't think anyone expected nora's season to be this good, after two other skam versions tried original seasons and both failed miserably it was so refreshing to watch an original season that was just planned and executed with so much care and love, so it's really easy to love nora when really there isn't much not to love about her

tl;dr i highly highly recommend checking out druck ng, especially s5 and 6 (verdict is still out on s7), they've managed to create so many wonderfully multi-dimensional characters that you can't help but love

[superfluffychickens]

Whenever Sascha feels Bullied and Afraid (which is often, the pullets love picking on him) he hides at the top of the stairs. He’s just a Little Boy after all, even though he’s taller than Pluto and all the girls, but he’ll become a Big Brave Boy someday! Whatever he becomes, I’ll still adore him with all my heart!

[karuuhnia]

Idk if you're still doing HCs but Expiration Date got me thinking about what the Mercs like to do in their spare time. What do you think are some of the mercs favorite pastimes/hobbies?

Scout: Mainly Sports and drawing. Oh, and going to the mall to hit on women and then get rejected. He also calls his Ma quite often to make sure she’s alright. He doesn’t admit it, but he also misses the family cat. lol

Soldier: Making cute little uniforms for his raccoons. Playing poker or getting drinks with the boys. Sometimes when there’s nothing else to do he’ll go to the park and shave the heads of some hippies.

Pyro: He likes to collect all sorts of things that he thinks are cute. To him they look like flowers, plushies, candy or tiny gems. In reality these things are probably maggots, bone fragments, a roadkill coyote etc. The others don’t like to go into his room...

Demo: He’s up to everything if he can just hang out with the boys: Playing cards, singing karaoke, getting drunk, visit a gun expo, playing soccer, even making music (even if he’s not that good). He just likes spending quality time with his friends.

Heavy: He usually likes it quiet and has no problem with spending half a day alone in his room, reading books or polishing Sascha. He doesn’t mind spending time with his friends either, but he usually just sits there quietly and listens to their conversations. However, his attitude changes completely if you give him something to drink. Then he laughs and giggles like a little girl.

Engie: Similar to Demo, he just likes spending quality time with the others. He also like barbecue and playing his guitar around a campfire. His presence alone  makes the others feel good and comfortable. He’s also a very curious person and likes to discuss interesting theories and abstract philosphical questions, mainly with Medic.

Medic: He barely distinguishes between work and free time, since he just loves what he’s doing. He loves experiments, learning new things, discussing (mainly with Engie), reading etc. Of course he makes sure to take care of his birds as well. Occasionally the others manage to drag him out of his lab. It’s not that he doesn’t like spending time with them, he usually just forgets or gets distracted by his research.

Sniper: He often drives to the desert to go for a hunt or look for animal tracks.  It’s not unusual for him to disappear on Friday evening and then returning Sunday afternoon, covered in dirt and sand, but with a huge game animal in tow to throw on the grill. He likes spending his time alone usually and if he decides to socialize he usually just takes one other person with him. 

Spy: He is a quiet one as well and usually sticks to himself. If the others insist that he has to come to one of their parties or game evenings he rolls his eyes and complains loudly, but in secret he’s kind of happy to included. He may be annoyed by them, but they’re still the closest thing to a friend group he’s had since his childhood.

[formerprincewille]

An audience can root for Loumail in the same way they were able to root for Kieu My and Fatou before Fatou's season and the same way they were able to make Constantin and Ismail relatively well liked before Ismail had given them any reason to think good about them or constantin had a sob story. The audience is very forgiving if they like the look of a person. Yes, the audience is shallow

A couple of differences here- we saw depth in Kieu My during Nora’s season. We saw that she wasn’t just a “mean girl”, and that she could actually be really sweet. We also saw a little depth in Ismail during Fatou’s season, and even this season. And you’re right- of course Isi and Consti are still liked by lots of the audience, I agree. However, we are now directly seeing Ismail hurt someone. And not just any someone, but their supposed best friend. And not just their supposed best friend, but a boy that is an ABSOLUTE CINNAMON ROLL. Sascha is literally designed for the audience to love, how could we not? He is kind, helpful, fun and tries to pull Ismail out of their funks. Not “hot” or anything but a total cutie. Good taste in music and wears grandpa sweaters like Matteo. And soft. He’s so soft. It’s not surprising at all that the audience by and large has taken to him. Ava did not garner the audience’s sympathy quite as much. And that was for several reasons. Which included her being a fat dark skinned black girl, obviously, but not entirely limited to that. A big thing about Ava is that the audience never really saw exactly what Constantin and Ismail did. We heard about it, but it can be easy for an audience to sort of distance themselves from something that we don’t actually see on screen. It’s just not going have the same impact or be reacted to the same way as something that we are witness to. This is another reason that you are seeing people upset over Sascha. Because we are literally watching what is happening to him and the way he is being treated in real time. And the text that was basically like “save me from Sascha”. I know that it was fairly light-hearted because it was about Sascha throwing his boxers on Ismail’s face. But given the fact that Isi invited themselves to Sascha’s place, then proceeded to ignore them which resulted in the underwear bombing, then continued to ignore them and asked Lou to “save them”….it leaves such a sour taste in people’s mouths.

[maxinaptak]

(AoT/ SNK) Key to Salvation: Eren X Abused!Reader

WARNING: REFRENCED NON-CON, FORCED DRUG USE

This is a rough one you guys. Proceed with caution.

You groaned as you rubbed the fairly fresh bruise on your shoulder, letting your head fall against the locker in front of you. The bruise on your shoulder wasn’t the only one you had; in fact, you had several more, both new and old, littering your body. You groaned again as you heard your best friend’s voice coming down the hallway. You lifted your head off your locker and pulled your sweater sleeve down your arm more, making sure it covered your bruise and the needle marks.

“________,” Eren called loudly, causing you to cringe lightly at his volume, “Where have you been? I haven’t seen you in a few days.”

He stopped next to you and looked at you with such innocent turquoise eyes. Oh, how you loved those innocent eyes. You could never tell Eren about what was going on at home. You just couldn’t.

“I was sick, that’s all,” you lied, faking a smile up at the boy, “Just a little cold. I'm fine now though.”

It almost pained you physically to lie to him, but how could you tell him that you had spent the last three days being given drugs against your will in a dirty basement where dozens of men abused your strung out, limp body while your mother collected their payment.

“Well, I'm glad you’re feeling better!” Eren said, smiling brightly.

You smiled almost sadly and sighed. Eren was your sweet, caring best friend. He had been since you were both in diapers. Fifteen years of friendship and you still couldn’t tell him what was happening; couldn’t tell him that you need help, beg for his help.

“Eren, will you lower your voice? I can hear you all the way down the hallway.” Mikasa, Eren’s adopted sister, said, flicking the brunet in the ear.

“Ow!” He cried, cupping his assaulted ear.

She rolled her eyes and looked at you.

“Are you sure you’re feeling better ________,” Mikasa asked, frowning, “You look more tired than normal.”

You faked another smile and said, “Yep, just fine!”

In all reality, you were going through a nasty withdraw from the clonazepam and oxy your mother normally gave you. This last time, she decided to give you something else to sedate you through your ‘work’, something she injected several times into your veins over the days. You had a feeling that if anyone would notice something was off, it would be Mikasa.

The other girl didn’t look too convinced, but nodded anyway and said, “If you say so. It’s almost time for class to start, so we should get going. You too Eren. If you’re late again, mom will have your ass.”

The tall boy rolled his eyes and hugged you goodbye. You tried your hardest to hide your pained flinch as he squeezed you tightly, but you knew Mikasa had seen it. Once he left, Mikasa set her hard gaze on you again.

“I saw that,” she said, crossing her arms, “What was that about?”

“Ok, so I may have hurt my back trying a new yoga pose yesterday. But I wasn’t gonna tell him that.” You said, jutting your thumb in the direction Eren had left in.

It wasn’t a total lie this time. Your back did hurt, but it sure as hell wasn’t from doing yoga. Your slightly older friend rolled her eyes and turned to head to your first hour class. You quickly ran after her, trying your best not to limp. You reached your AP Psychology class and took your seats. Your teacher had the desks in clusters of six or seven seats and you two got lucky enough to be put with your friends.

“Hey guys.” You said, plopping your book down onto your desk.

Krista, Ymir, Sascha, and Max all smiled back and greeted you both. You made small talk for a few minutes before the bell rang, signaling the start of the school day. You turned your attention to your teacher, Mr. O’Neil, and swallowed hard when you saw what he was writing on the board.

Drug Addiction: The effects, the signs, and withdrawal symptoms.

‘Fuck my life with a cactus….’ You thought, slowly sliding down in your seat a little.

You prayed to whatever god there may be (though you didn’t really believe that there was one anymore) that none of your friends, especially Mikasa, would notice that you were exhibiting some of the signs and symptoms.

You had managed to make it through the class with your teeth clenched and practically sprinted out of the room when it was over. You made it to your economics class in record time and slumped into your seat, letting your head slam down on your desk.

“Damn kid, rough morning?”

You slowly raised your head to look at your student teacher, Levi Ackerman. Apparently, he was a distant cousin to Mikasa, but she didn’t really know him.

“Rough couple of days.” You admitted, voice flat and eyes dull.

The short male regarded you carefully, as he had taken note that you had been absent for the past three days and went to his bag.

“Alright kiddo, I’ve got some dark chocolate and a Red Machine Naked Juice,” he said, placing said items on your desk in front of you, “You look like you’ve been through some shit, and you need these more than I do. Besides, it looks like you’ve lost a shit ton of weight since the semester started.”

Your face flushed bright red. You didn’t think Mr. Ackerman paid that much attention to any of his students, let alone you.

“T-thanks Mr. Ackerman….” You said, opening the chocolate bar and taking a small bite.

“No problem kid.” He said, turning to go back to his desk, but stopping.

He hesitated for a moment before turning back to you and crouching down next to you.

He waited for you to meet his gaze and quietly said, “________, you can come to me if you need to talk or if you need help, ok?”

You stared at him in shock and slowly nodded. You’d never heard him speak like that and it almost freaked you out. He nodded at you and returned to his desk. You let your eyes fall onto your desk and stared at it blankly.

“________?”

You jumped and whipped around to see Eren setting his stuff down on the desk next to you.

“What was that all about?” He asked, discreetly nodding his head in your teacher’s direction.

You swallowed hard and stumbled over your words as you tried to reply.

“N-nothing,” you said, averting your eyes from his, “He was just telling me that I looked like crap and needed to eat something, so he gave me this, that’s all.”

You quickly grabbed the bottle of juice and tried to open it, but struggled. You knew you had been having a bit of a hard time doing normal things, but never had you struggled to open a beverage bottle. You frowned and stopped trying to open the juice.

“Here, I got it,” Eren said, taking the bottle from you and cracking it open easily with his large hands, “I'm kinda shocked he’d be nice enough to give you something, but you should drink this. It’ll help you feel better.”

He carefully put the bottle back into your hand and you weakly smiled at him. You took a long drink from the juice and sighed, satisfied by the taste. Soon the room was full and the bell rang, class starting.

Levi’s eyes scanned over his students as they worked on the small packet he had given them to complete before the end of class. He heard a snore from beside him and looked at the teacher he was supposed to be shadowing, Dot Pixis, and rolled his eyes when he saw him asleep again. How that man became a teacher was beyond him. He heard footsteps approaching his desk and turned his attention forward again.

“Eren and I are finished with the packet.” ________ said, holding out two packets.

“As always, finished before anyone else. The brat is lucky you partner with him every time.” Levi said, shaking his head and reaching out for the papers.

As ________ pulled her hand away, she accidently knocked over the cup of pens and pencils on the desk.

“Shit, sorry Mr. Ackerman. I’ll take care of it.” She said, crouching down quickly.

“It’s fine, kid, don’t worry about it.” He said, looking over the side of his desk at her.

His eyes widened as the left sleeve of her sweater raised up, revealing a bruise vaguely shaped like a handprint and several track marks on her upper forearm. He froze, not knowing what to do as he watched her quickly pick up the scattered writing utensils and put them back into the cup. He swallowed hard and tried to formulate words, say anything to her, but he couldn’t manage it, too shocked. She smiled smally at him before going back to her desk. His eyes followed her and jumped over to Eren, her best friend. If he couldn’t talk to ________ directly, he sure as hell could talk to the brat.

“Jaeger, see me after class.” He said, trying to keep his voice steady.

Eren groaned loudly.

“What the fuck did I do this time?” Eren practically whined.

He dramatically draped himself over where your desks were pushed together, making you breathe out a laugh.

“I don’t know, but this happens at least once a week and you know it.” You said, petting his shoulder length hair.

He sighed deeply and peeked up at you with his beautiful turquoise eyes, pouting. You stared at him and couldn’t help but smile lovingly at him. You’d never told anyone, but you’d been in love with the tall boy since you were eleven and he was twelve. He’d always been there for you, doing everything he could to make you laugh and smile. Usually, he’d drag Armin into his antics too, but it was all in good fun and you all laughed together.

“Your hair’s get long,” you murmured, playing with the little bun that was tied at the base of his skull, “Are you gonna cut it?”

Eren hummed and said, “Nah, I kinda like it like this. What do you think about it? Does it look bad?”

You shook your head and said, “No, I like it. I think it looks really good on you.”

“Then I’m definitely keeping it long.” He said, smiling up at you.

You smiled back and continued to talk to him for the rest of class. When the bell rang, you gathered your things and gave Eren a sympathetic look.

“I’ll see you later Eren. Have fun with Mr. A.” You said, waving.

“Yeah,” he groaned, standing up, “Have fun in anatomy with Armin. Embarrass him for me, would ya?”

“Sure! I’ve got a good dirty joke or two that I haven’t told in front of him yet.” You said, grinning.

Eren sighed and picked up his bag before walking up to Levi’s desk.

“You wanted to see me sir?” He asked, shoulders slumped.

Levi nodded and said, “Yes. What class do you have next?”

Eren was confused but answered, “German. Why?”

“Are you doing well in that class?” Levi asked.

“I’ve been speaking German since I was born basically,” Eren said, still confused as all hell, “My dad’s family lives in Germany, and my grandparents don’t speak English very well. I only took the class so I could get an easy A…. Why do you ask?”

Levi stood from his desk and motioned for Eren to follow him as he said, “I wanted to make sure it wouldn’t be a problem if you missed part of the class. I need to speak to you, but somewhere private.”

Eren was beyond confused now but followed his teacher anyway. The shorter man always seemed rather serious, but this time, he seemed deadly serious about whatever it was. He followed Levi to one of the biology labs and went inside.

“Hanji, I need to borrow your lab for a little bit,” Levi said, addressing one of the other student teachers he was friends with, “I need to speak to Eren alone.”

The crazy science teacher looked up from her notes and said, “Oh! Ok, sure! Just let me know when you’re done!”

She quickly left the room and closed the door behind her. Levi sat down and motioned for Eren to do the same. The younger boy did, facing his teacher.

“What’s going on Mr. Ackerman?” Eren asked, frowning.

Levi took a deep breath and said, “I need to talk to you about ________.”

Eren’s eyebrows furrowed and he asked, “________? What about her?”

“Something’s going on with her. Has she said anything to you?” He asked.

Eren thought for a moment before shaking his head as he said, “I mean, she said that she had a cold and that’s why she wasn’t at school the last few days. Other than that, no.”

Levi nodded and thought for a moment before he asked, “Eren, you’re her best friend, right?”

The brunet nodded.

“Do you pay close attention to her? The way she looks, the way she acts?”

Eren blinked a few times before shyly nodding his head.

“Then have you noticed that she’s lost quite a bit of weight since the semester started?” Levi asked.

Eren nodded again and said, “I tried to ask her about it once, but she got really upset about it and snapped at me, so I didn’t say anything after that. But I noticed that she was losing more and more weight as the weeks went on. And every few weeks she looks really sick and upset, but she won’t talk to me about it….”

Levi sighed deeply again and said, “Eren, I saw something on her arm today, in class when she was picking up the pens. That’s why I asked you to stay after.”

“What was on her arm?” Eren asked, worried and confused at the same time.

“There was a large bruise that looked like a handprint. And she had several… track marks on her forearm.” Levi said, letting his own shoulders drop in sadness.

“What are track marks?” Eren asked, still confused.

Levi looked up at Eren and said, “Needle marks, Eren. From using drugs.”

Eren’s eyes widened.

“Drugs?! No way! ________ would never!” Eren said, denial evident in his voice.

Levi sighed again and said, “Eren I know what track marks look like. It’s no secret that I grew up on the streets. A lot of people I ran with did drugs back then. I know what I saw.”

Eren’s heart dropped into his stomach, knowing that his teacher couldn’t be wrong. He thought back over the months and remembered seeing ________’s forearms and elbow crooks all the time. There were never any needle marks before. Bruises, sure, but ________ was clumsy.

“I-it must be new…,” he said, looking down at his hands, “She’s never had needle marks on her arms before….”

“What about the bruises?” Levi asked.

Eren shrugged and said, “She’s always had a few bruises here and there, ever since we were kids. She’s clumsy as hell, always has been. And she bruises easily because she’s anemic.”

“Has she always been anemic?”

Eren shook his head and said, “No…. It started around the time we started high school. That’s also when she started to look sick and upset every few weeks…. And her weight started fluctuating and her eating habits changed too….”

Eren’s eyebrows furrowed again and he started to get more upset, thinking about how something was wrong with his best friend, the girl he was in love with, and he didn’t even realize, even though he saw everything.

“I should have known something was wrong….” Eren whispered, clenching his fists.

“Eren, it’s not your fault. You guys are kids still. It’s not your job to watch every little detail about her.” Levi said, trying to make the teen feel less guilty.

“But I love her,” Eren almost cried, a desperate look on his face, “I have been watching every detail about her for years! I should have known!”

Eren hung his head and let out a shaky breath, resting his head in his hands. Levi looked at his student sadly. He knew that the boy was in love with ________; it was pretty obvious, at least to him. And he could see that ________ loved him back. It was beyond him why the two hadn’t began dating yet, but that was beside the point at the moment.

“Now you know something’s up with her. Use the information you have now and talk to her.” Levi said, putting a hand on Eren’s shoulder.

The younger male looked up at his teacher and sighed, nodding.

Levi nodded back and said, “Alright. Now come on. I’ll write you a note to excuse you for missing class.”

Eren nodded again and sadly trailed behind his teacher. He got his note and trudged to his German class. He gave the note to Herr Ham and took his seat in the back of the classroom, spacing out. It didn’t matter if her paid attention or not. His teacher was horrible and taught in a ridiculous way that confused most students. The only reason he was top of the class was because he’s a native speaker. All he could think about was ________. He would see her again fifth hour for lunch and he didn’t know how he could face her without saying anything. He didn’t want to talk to her in front of their friends. He sighed and rested his head on his arms on his desk.

“For fuck’s sake….” You muttered, sitting back on your legs.

You were currently on your knees in a bathroom stall, retching into the toilet every so often. It didn’t surprise you that this was happening; you were going through oxycodone withdrawal after all. Nausea and vomiting were normal. You’d gone through this a few times before, but never this badly. You wondered if whatever drug your mother gave you the last few days was making it worse this time around.

“Oh god,” you groaned, feeling bile rise in your throat again, “Not again…!”

You heaved into the toilet again, hot tears running down your cheeks. All you had had to eat that day was what Mr. Ackerman had given you during econ, and there was no way any of it still resided in your stomach. All you could taste was stomach acid, your throat burning. You checked the time on your phone and sighed. Fifth period was almost over and you knew Eren would be worried that you weren’t there. You tried to get up and leave a few times, but it was obvious that your body wasn’t done. You shakily unlocked your phone and typed out a choppy text to Eren.

Eren frowned as he arrived at his normal lunch table. Armin and Max were sitting together, holding hands and feeding each other like normal; Mikasa and Annie were sitting across from each other, glaring at each other with an awkward sexual tension between them, like normal; and Jean and Marco were holding hands and eating quietly, like normal. What was not like normal, was the fact that ________ was missing. Eren was always the last one to arrive at the table and ________ was always sitting in one of the two open seats left at the table when he got there.

“Has anyone seen ________?” He asked, sitting down.

Max swallowed a strawberry Armin had fed her and said, “Not since third hour.”

“I saw her heading towards the cafeteria on my way here,” Marco said, frowning slightly, “But then she ran into the bathroom. I haven’t seen her since.”

Eren frowned deeply and stared down at his food. He sighed and ultimately started to pick at his food, eventually shoveling it into his mouth quickly as his dumb teenage body demanded him to. Near the end of the hour, his phone vibrated. He fished it out of his pocket and looked at it. It was a text from ________.

Felt sick, stuck in bathroom. Sorry. See you later.

Eren frowned again and sighed.

“What’s wrong Eren?” Mikasa asked, finally breaking her gaze away from her (not so secret) secret girlfriend.

“________ texted me. She said she was feeling sick and was stuck in the bathroom.” Eren said, shoulders slumping.

Max frowned and said, “I can go check on her if you’re really worried.”

Eren looked up at the red-haired girl gratefully and said, “Yes, please.”

She smiled and nodded. She leaned over to Armin and gave him several quick kisses before getting up and leaving the cafeteria.

“________?”

You jumped as you heard someone call your name. You knew that voice; it was your friend Max.

“M-Max?” You choked out, coughing.

You heard her run to the large stall you were in and try the door.

“________, are you ok? Eren said you were sick and you don’t sound good at all!” She said, voice full of concern.

You weakly moved to open the door to let her in before going back to slumping against the wall. She quickly came in and dropped to her knees in front of you.

“Oh my god, hon, are you ok?” She asked, gently putting her hands on your arms.

You sighed as more tears slipped from your eyes and shook your head as you breathed, “No…. I’ve been throwing up all hour….”

“Oh no, ________...,” Max said, looking at you sadly, “You need to go to the nurse and go home!”

You sighed again and said, “My mom won’t come get me….”

“I’ll take you home. They’ve let me do it for Armin before, and he wasn’t nearly this sick.” Max said, pulling her phone out.

She called Armin and asked for him to come to the bathroom and help. She hung up and pocketed her phone before gently stroking your (h/c) hair.

A minute later the door to the bathroom opened and you heard Armin call out, “Max, ________? Is there anyone else in there or can we come in?”

“It’s just us, come in.” Max called back.

Soon Armin was in the doorway of the stall, Eren behind him. Eren quickly pushed his way past him and gently scooped you up into his arms. Armin grabbed your backpack and followed you out of the bathroom. A security guard saw you being carried out of the bathroom by Eren and Armin following behind and asked what was going on.

“Our friend got really sick and needs to go to the nurse, but she couldn’t walk. I couldn’t carry her on my own, so I asked them to come and help.” Max explained, giving the older man puppy dog eyes.

The security guard was a little flustered by the look she was giving him and he let you guys go. You giggled a little, knowing your friend would use her incredibly seductive puppy dog eyes to get you out of any trouble. Armin may not like it, but you thought it was hilarious. Your little group made its way to the nurse’s office and Max explained the situation to the woman. Taking one look at you, the nurse gave Max permission to drive you home. She called the office and asked for a teacher to escort you out so you wouldn’t get in trouble. You were a little surprised to see Mr. Ackerman walk into the room, concern written all over his usually stoic face.

“I knew you were feeling sick this morning, but I didn’t know it was this bad.” He said, frowning.

You looked down shyly and shrugged your shoulders as best you could in Eren’s arms. Your group, now escorted by your teacher, made its way outside to Max’s car. Eren carefully placed you in the passenger seat and handed you a plastic bag for ‘just in case’. Armin put your bag in the backseat along with Max’s and kissed the girl before she got in. The three males stepped back and your friend pulled out of the parking spot. She drove carefully to your house and parked in your driveway.

“Do you need help inside?” She asked, turning to look at you.

You hesitated, not know if you really wanted to bother her anymore.

“You know what, don’t answer,” she said, unbuckling her seatbelt, “I’m helping you to as least the front door.”

She got out of the car and you sighed, a small smile tugging at the corners of your lips. Your door opened and Max helped you out of the car. She grabbed your bag from the back. She took your arm and helped you slowly walk to the door. You unlocked it and stepped inside, taking your bag from your friend.

“Thank you.” You said, smiling at your friend.

She smiled back and said, “Anytime. And if you’re not feeling better by Saturday morning, one of us is taking you to the doctor.”

You opened your mouth to say no but you didn’t get a chance.

“No arguments,” Max said, finality in her voice, “If you’re still this sick, you’re going to the doctor.”

You sighed in defeat and said, “Ok. Thanks for today. I’ll see you tomorrow. Hopefully.”

Max smiled at you sadly and nodded before getting back in her car and driving away, heading back to school. You closed the door and dragged your feet towards your room.

“What the fuck are you doing home?”

You silently groaned and turned to look at your mother.

“I got really sick.” You said, rubbing your face tiredly.

“That’s no excuse for you to come home.” The woman said, irritated.

You dully stared at her and said, “I was throwing up every few minutes all of fifth hour. It finally seems to have calmed down but I still feel like shit. My friends took me to the nurse and they made me go home.”

Your mother glared at you and said, “Well why the fuck are you sick anyway?”

You glared back and said, “I don’t know, maybe it’s because I'm going through serious withdrawal from the clonazepam and oxy. It’s been four days since you last shoved oxy down my throat and it’s hitting me hard as fuck this time.”

Your mother rolled her eyes and turned back to her magazine. You shook your head and made you way to your bedroom. You set your bag down by your desk before falling face down on your bed. Luckily, your bed was still sacred and safe. The only man that had ever been in your bed was Eren, and those times were never sexual. Only lazy weekend naps and scrolling through social media together, showing each other things you found funny. You sighed heavily again and wiggled your way under your covers, managing to fall asleep a little faster than normal due to how horrible you felt.

Max pulled back in to her parking spot at school and turned off her car. She sighed and stepped out, shocked to see the three males she’d left fifteen minutes ago standing in the same place.

“You guys waited here this whole time?” She asked, confused.

They nodded and Armin took her hand, leading her back into the school. Eren and Levi slowly trail behind them and spoke quietly.

“Did you get a chance to talk to her?” Levi asked.

Eren shook his head and said, “No…. She got sick before I even saw her….”

Levi nodded and they walked in silence. They’d figure out the best way to talk to her eventually.

You groaned as you rinsed your mouth out for the fourth time that morning. You hadn’t made it to school the day before and you were still sick. It was now Saturday, and you knew your phone would be ringing soon. One of your friends would be taking you to the doctor today, and you were dreading it. As if on cue, your phone began to ring. You sighed and walked into your room to pick it up.

“Hello?” You asked, answering without checking the caller ID.

“________, how are you feeling?” Eren’s voice came through.

“Oh, Eren…,” you said, not expecting him to call this early, “I-I’m… not doing so hot….”

You finally admitted to him that you weren’t alright. You sat on your bed and wrapped your free arm around your stomach.

“You’re still feeling sick?” Eren asked, a frown evident in his voice.

You sighed and answered, “Yeah. Honestly, I'm not feeling any better than I did at school the other day.”

“Alright, I’m taking you to the doctor,” Eren said, sounding like he was getting up, “Get ready, I’ll be there in fifteen minutes.”

You were surprised, but said, “O-ok…! Um, I’ll be ready.”

He hung up with a quick goodbye and you stared down at your phone, blinking owlishly. You sighed again and set it down on your bed so you could get ready. You pulled on a pair of leggings and a t-shirt with your school’s mascot on it. You grabbed the hoodie that you had been wearing to bed, which actually belonged to Eren, and pulled it on, smiling at the way you drowned in the large garment. You pulled on a pair of slip-on boots and grabbed your small backpack purse. You grabbed your phone and made your way downstairs. Your mother was snoring loudly on the couch, an empty bottle of vodka still gripped in her hand that was hanging off the edge, resting on the floor. You rolled your eyes and leaned against the wall next to the window by the front door. A few minutes later, Eren’s beat up old car pulled into your driveway and you slipped out the door, locking it behind you. Eren met you halfway to the car and gently took your hand in one of his and braced your arm with the other, helping you to walk to the car. He opened your door and helped you in, even buckling your seatbelt for you.

“Thank you.” You said, smiling up at him.

He smiled back at you and carefully closed your door before going around the car and getting in the driver’s seat. He backed out of your driveway and took off down the street, heading towards downtown.

“Where are we going anyway,” you asked, biting your lip, “You know I don’t have insurance….”

He grinned over at you and said, “We’re going to my dad’s clinic. He said he’d see you free of charge.”

You smiled hearing that. Grisha Jaeger was a good man. Since your families had known each other since you and Eren were babies, you grew up seeing the man often. He was always kind to you, and you knew he was a good man since he took in Mikasa after her parents died when she and Eren were ten. He was the only father figure you had left since your dad died when you were eight. It was around that time that your mom started drinking and selling sex for money. When you turned fourteen, she realized that she could sell you instead and get even more money without her having to do anything. You sighed lightly as all of these thoughts swirled through your head, making it throb slightly.

“Hey, you good? Need me to roll the window down or something?” Eren asked, looking at you worriedly.

You smiled nervously at him and said, “Don’t worry, I’m not gonna throw up in your car. It’s passed for now at least. I was just kinda spacing out, that’s all.”

Eren nodded and said, “I’m glad you feel better now. And you throwing up in my car probably wouldn’t be the worst thing that’s happened in here. I’m pretty sure Jean and Marco fucked in the backseat that time we went camping last summer.”

“Oh my god, seriously?!” You asked, shocked and kind of amused.

Eren nodded and said, “I saw them sneaking back to the campsite from the parking lot and then my car smelled nasty the next morning. And Marco couldn’t look me in the eye for a week.”

You laughed harder than you had laughed in a long time at this, holding your stomach as it cramped lightly.

“Ow…,” you cried, tears of laughter streaming down your face, “It hurts! It’s so funny it hurts!”

You quickly pulled you phone out and dialed Jean’s number.

“Hello?”

“Jean, did you and Marco really fuck in Eren’s car last summer when we went camping?!” You asked, still laughing.

You could hear the horror in his voice as he said, “How did you find out about that?!”

You barked out another laugh and said, “Eren’s known about it since it happened! He saw you guys sneaking back to the campsite that night!”

Jean swore and hung up on you, causing you to laugh even harder. You put your phone back in your purse and leaned back in your seat, your laughter dying down.

“I can’t believe you called him.” Eren chuckled, shaking his head.

“I can’t believe he admitted it to me. Well, in a way.” You said, giggling again.

Eren rolled his eyes and pulled into the empty parking lot of his dad’s clinic.

He must have seen your confused look and said, “The clinic doesn’t open until 11 o’clock. Dad wanted me to bring you in early to make sure there was time to do a thorough exam and run any tests needed before any other patients were here.”

You nodded in understanding and bit your lip nervously. At least one of your secrets was about to come out and you were not ready for that. Your door opened and you jumped slightly, looking up to see Eren shaking his head at you. He leaned down and unbuckled your seatbelt for you. He took your hand and helped you out of the car. You expected him to let go of your hand, but he didn’t. Instead, he held onto your hand tightly and guided you to the back door of the clinic, unlocking it and opening it, leading you in.

“You have a key?” You asked.

He nodded and said, “I sometimes help dad out by coming in before or after hours and help clean and stuff.”

You nodded and looked around hesitantly, not ready for this.

“Dad, we’re here!” He called into the mostly dark clinic.

“Back here, room 3.” His father called back.

Eren lead you down two hallways to the only room with lights on. You saw Dr. Jaeger setting up several different things and you immediately froze. He must have noticed because gave you a gentle smile.

“Relax ________,” he said softly, “Eren told me that you haven’t been to a doctor in quite a while, so I figured we’d just do a full work up.”

You swallowed had and nodded, letting Eren lead you over to the exam table, helping you to sit on it. He smiled at you a little before letting go of your hand, turning to leave the room.

“W-wait…,” you said, reaching out and grabbing his arm, “Stay… please…?”

He blinked at you a few times before looking at his father and asked, “Is it alright if stay dad?”

“As long as she says it’s alright, then yes.” He answered, nodding.

Eren nodded as well and moved to stand next to the exam table. You didn’t look at him or his dad, instead, just staring down at your hands in your lap.

“Alright, let’s start with your height and weight.” Dr. Jaeger said, motioning for you to come over to the scale.

You slipped off the table and went over, letting him measure your height (A/N: anything shorter than 6 foot so you’re shorter than Eren). You couldn’t look at the little screen on the scale where the numbers would pop up, indicating your weight.

“94 lbs,” Dr. Jaeger said, frowning, “________, that’s extremely low.”

You swallowed hard and said, “I know…. I knew my weight was low but I didn’t know it was that low….”

You trudged back to the exam table and climbed back onto it, not meeting the eyes of either Jaeger. The older man came over and grabbed the blood pressure cuff.

“Can you take your sweater off please?” Dr. Jaeger asked.

You took a shuddering deep breath and slowly pulled off your hoodie. You shyly offered the doctor you left arm, looking anywhere but him. The room was silent as you felt both males staring at you.

“________, I’m going to ask you some questions, and I need you to be completely honest with me, do you understand?” Dr. Jaeger asked.

You nodded, pulling your arm back, wrapping both your arms around your body.

“Are you taking drugs?” He asked.

“Not willingly….” You answered quietly.

“Someone’s making you take them?”

You nodded again.

“Who?”

You swallowed hard and said, “My mom….”

You felt Eren’s eyes boring into the side of your head but you refused to look at him.

“What is she giving you?” Dr asked.

“Normally she gives me clonazepam and oxy when I… have to work…. But last time she injected me with something instead. I don’t know what it was though….” You said, bringing one hand up to bite on your nails.

Dr. Jaeger was quiet for a moment before he asked, “What kind of work do you do?”

You squeezed your eyes closed tightly and said, “Sex work….”

“What?!” Eren cried, making you cringe.

“Eren, calm down,” Grisha said, “Freaking out right now isn’t going to help her at all.”

“S-sorry….” Eren stuttered, gently taking your hand.

“Does your mother force you to do this work?” Dr asked.

You nodded and said, “Yes…. When my dad died, she couldn’t pay the bills anymore and started selling herself. When I turned fourteen, she realized that if she sold me, she could make twice the money without having to do anything herself. I struggled and fought at first, and she would always get mad and say that I was too loud and that we’d get caught. So, she started drugging me to get through the meetings. It started out with just the clonazepam, but somewhere along the way she added the oxy.

“It was only once every few weeks at first, but then she started taking me to that place every week. Now it’s at least three nights a week, for… well, I’m actually not sure how long were there for since I’m drugged the whole time…. After she started bringing me every week, my body got dependent on the drugs…. That’s how she controls me now…. I've been going through really bad withdrawal this whole week…. The last time I had either was Sunday night….”

Both Jaegers were quiet for a moment.

Dr. Jaeger sighed heavily and said, “________, because of what your mother has been forcing you to do, I’m going to have to ask you some difficult questions, alright?”

You nodded.

“Do you know how many men have… been with you?” He asked, sounding like he didn’t want to be asking you these questions, just as much as you didn’t want to be asked them.

“I’m not sure…. I’m drugged every time now…. But if I had to guess… probably at least 300, maybe 350….” You said, rubbing your arm in shame.

Another sigh came from the doctor and you could hear Eren breathing heavily.

“Do you know if protection was used?”

You sighed and said, “Mom never put me on birth control and from the number of times I woke up to… fluids dripping down my thighs I assume not.”

Sighs were heard from both males in the room and you finally looked up. Dr. Jaeger looked conflicted and Eren looked so sad and so angry at the same time.

“I’m sorry I never told you Eren,” you said, hesitantly gripping his sleeve, “I was so embarrassed and… I was scared that if anyone found out that I would get in trouble….”

Eren shook his head almost violently and said, “Don’t apologize! It’s not your fault she made you do that! I’m sorry that I never notice anything was going on!”

“It’s alright Eren. I did everything I could to make sure you didn’t know.” You said, shrugging.

You both fell silent and Dr. Jaeger cleared his throat. You turned your attention back to him.

“Given the information you’ve provided me, I’m afraid I need to perform a pelvic exam and take some swabs and samples to make sure you’re not seriously sick.” He said, looking at you apologetically.

You sighed and nodded, figuring this was coming.

You looked at Eren and asked, “Will you stay with me still?”

He looked at you confused and asked, “Are you sure you want me to stay in here while he exams your… you know… girly bits?”

You nodded and said, “I already know it’s gonna be uncomfortable as hell. I've heard these exams can hurt a little, especially if samples need to be taken. It’s also going to be awkward as fuck since it’s your dad and all, so I might as well have some sort of comfort. You can face the wall behind me if it helps.”

He hesitated, but nodded. Dr. Jaeger began to gather all of the instruments and things he needed for the exam while you put on the paper gown he gave you. You asked Eren to tie it for you and her did. Once it was tied, you slipped off your leggings and panties without him seeing anything. To spare both of you any extra embarrassment, you folded your panties inside your leggings so he didn’t see them.

“Lay back and place your feet into the stirrups, then slide your bottom towards the end of the table.” Dr. Jaeger said, sitting on the rolling stool.

You did what you were told and held your hand out to Eren, who was facing the wall behind you, but could still see you. He took your hand and held it tightly. Dr. Jaeger started to examine you and you breathed deeply, closing your eyes. You could feel your face heat up in embarrassment and couldn’t bring yourself to look at Eren, even as he squeezed your hand reassuringly. Once you felt the speculum touch you, you breathed deeply again, anticipating the pain of something entering you. It didn’t hurt while going in, but when it started to open, you whined slightly at the burning pain.

“I apologize ________,” Dr said, “I’ll be as quick as I can.”

You nodded and bit your lip. After what felt like forever, but was only about a minute and a half, the speculum was pulled out of you and you sighed in relief. You sat up and looked at Dr. Jaeger, watching as he collected all of the swabs and samples he had taken.

“I’m going to go process these and we should have the results in about twenty minutes. I’ll also need to take some blood samples to check a few things.” He said, standing.

You nodded and took the towel he handed you. He left the room and Eren turned his back so you could clean yourself up and get dressed again. You did so quickly and tossed the towel into the labeled basket.

“I’m done.” You said, sitting on the table again.

Eren turned back to you and leaned against the exam table, pulling you into a tight, but gentle hug. You hugged him back and buried your face into his neck.

“I love you,” he said, stroking your (h/c) hair, “I’ve wanted to tell you for so long but I was too scared. But after hearing that your own mother was forcing you to do that kind of stuff, I felt like I had to tell you… tell you that someone loved you….”

You teared up a little and said, “I love you too Eren…. But I was so scared to tell you because I thought no one could love me when I’m so used and disgusting….”

“You’re not disgusting,” Eren said, kissing your forehead, “You’ve been abused. None of it was your choice or your fault. Nothing could make me stop loving you.”

You looked up at him and he smiled at you. He leaned down and kissed you gently. You kissed him back before resting your head against his chest while he stood between your legs, hugging you. You stayed like that until the door opened again.

“Can I assume that you two finally confessed?” Dr. Jaeger asked, raising an eyebrow.

You giggled quietly and Eren nodded.

He nodded back and said, “Congratulations, and finally. Now, I’m sorry to have to separate you two lovebirds, but I need to take some blood samples.”

You nodded and pulled away from Eren to offer your arm to his father. He tied a rubber strip around your arm and felt for your vein. Once he found it, he skillfully stuck the needle in your arm and collected the blood he needed.

“Eren, hold this here for me.” He said, nodding down to the folded cotton pad he had placed over the needlestick.

Eren’s tanned fingers gently pressed down on the cotton and his father went to dispose of the needle. He came back with a roll of (f/c) coban and wrapped it around your arm. You thanked him and moved back to your embrace with Eren.

“I’ll run these tests and when all the results are back, we’ll go over them. For now, relax.” Grisha said, nodding at you two.

You nodded and rested your head back on Eren’s chest. He rested his chin on top of your head and hummed happily. You talked idly for a little over half an hour before Dr. Jaeger came back in, a dark look on his face.

“I know that look,” Eren said, sounding a little scared, “And nothing good comes after it….”

Grisha sighed and pulled the rolling stool over again, sitting down in front of you.

“Don’t sugarcoat it.” You said, trying to steal your nerves.

“There are a few things that we need to discus,” Dr. Jaeger said, looking down at the clipboard in his hands, “Are you sure you ok with Eren hearing this information?”

You nodded and said, “Yes. He knows everything else now. I’m not going to hide anything from him anymore.”

Dr. Jaeger nodded and said, “Alright. We’ll your anemia has gotten worse, which judging by how low your iron levels are, is probably due to your lack of nutrition. And your extreme weight loss is most likely due to your body’s dependence on the drugs.”

You nodded at his words. You had kind of figured that would be the case, but you were dreading whatever other diagnoses you might get.

“You have a few other vitamin deficiencies and insufficiencies, but that’s to be expected.”

You nodded.

“Unfortunately, I have two more rather serious diagnoses for you.”

You swallowed hard and nodded, holding onto Eren’s hand tightly.

“The lesser of the two is that you have a bacterial infection. It can be taken care of with antibiotics though.” Dr. Jaeger said.

You closed your eyes and sighed sadly.

“It’s an STD… isn’t it…?” You asked, looking at him.

“Yes. You have chlamydia, which, like I said, is treatable,” Dr said, trying to reassure you, “All you have to do is take the antibiotics that I give you and abstain from any sexual activity for a while and you’ll be cured.”

You nodded sadly and asked, “What’s the other bad news?”

Dr. Jaeger fell silent and his face grew dark again. A chill ran down your spine at the look.

“Dad,” Eren said, “What is it?”

The man sighed heavily and said, “________, according to your blood test, you’re somewhere between four and six weeks pregnant….”

The blood drained out of your face and your heart dropped into your stomach. You could see Dr. Jaeger’s lips moving, but all you could hear was a high-pitched ringing. It hadn’t been the withdrawal that was making you so sick…. It was because you were pregnant….

“I think I'm gonna be sick…!” You said, jumping up from the exam table and running to the garbage can that was built into the counter next to the sink.

You hunched over it and heaved roughly, bringing up stomach acid again. Gentle hands gathered your hair away from your face and another hand rubbed your back. You retched a few more times before gasping and coughing.

“Rinse your mouth out dear.” Dr. Jaeger said, turning the water on and grabbing a small cup.

He filled it and handed it to you. You took the water in, swished it around and spit it out in the sink. You coughed a few more times before straightening up, stumbling slightly. Eren quickly steadied you and brought you into his chest. Tears flooded your eyes and you began to sob.

“What am I going to do…?!” You cried, grabbing onto Eren’s shirt tightly.

“We’ll figure it out,” he said, hugging you tightly, “We’ll get through this. I swear…!”

You spent a while crying into your boyfriend’s chest before you were able to calm down.

“Eren, I want you to take ________ to our house,” Grisha said, taking his phone out, “I’ll call your mother and explain what’s going on. She’ll know how to help.”

Eren nodded and lead you out of the clinic and back to his car. He got you in and quickly drove to his house. He helped you out of the car and to the front door where his mother met you.

“Oh ________, darling.” She cooed, pulling you into a hug.

You started to cry again and she slowly brought you to the couch. She lowered you both down and stroked your hair. Eren came and sat on your other side and rested his hand on your knee, letting you know he was there. You managed to calm down quicker this time and pulled out of Carla’s loving embrace.

You sniffled and said, “Did Papa call you yet?”

Carla smiled lightly at the name you had called Grisha since your father died and nodded.

“I have a plan.” She said, petting your hair.

You nodded and Eren asked, “What is it?”

“There are obviously a few things that we need to address, but the first one is ________’s mother. We need to get the police involved.” Carla said.

You sighed. You were afraid she was going to say that.

“I know you don’t want to ________, but we have to,” Carla said, petting your hair gently, “But don’t worry, we’ll be with you the whole way.”

You nodded and asked, “What do we do after that?”

“We get you in a rehab program to get your body to not be dependent on the drugs anymore.” She answered.

You nodded again and looked down at your hands.

“What about… the baby…?” Eren asked, hesitant.

You peeked up at Carla through your lashes, curious to see her reaction.

She smiled a little sadly and said, “It’s still early on. We need to take care of those two things first, and then we’ll turn our attention to that. Oh, and we need to get that infection cleared up! That’s really priority number 1. Well, 1A, since we can do that and the police at the same time.”

You giggled a little at her, causing her to smile at you.

“Mom, can ________ stay with us from now on?” Eren asked.

“Of course! We’re getting that bitch thrown in jail so she needs somewhere to live. And this is the safest place for her.” Carla said.

You and Eren looked at the woman in shock.

“Mom!” Eren exclaimed, wide-eyed.

She looked at you two and asked, “What?”

“You never swear,” you giggled, “At least, not like that!”

The woman shrugged and said, “I’m just calling it like I see it.”

You giggled again and nodded.

“My mom should be out doing god knows what right now, so we should probably go get my stuff.” You said, looking to Eren.

He nodded and you stood, say goodbye to your new mother and going to the car. It didn’t take long to reach your house and you sighed in relief when you saw that your mother’s car was indeed gone. You quickly went inside and to your room. You went to your closet and reached for the large duffle bag that was on the top shelf, but couldn’t reach it.

“Need some help there?” Eren asked, coming up behind you and putting a hand on your waist.

“Yes please.” You said, tilting your head back so you could look up at him.

He smiled down at you and gave you a quick kiss before grabbing the bag. He placed it on your bed and helped you shove your small wardrobe into it. You didn’t have a lot of stuff, since you didn’t see any of the money you made from ‘working’, so your belongings were few and far between and all fit into your duffle and backpack. Shoving the last item into your bag, a photo of you and Eren from when you were kids, you froze as you heard the front door slam shut.

“________, are you back? Whose piece of shit car is that?” Your mother yelled, sounding mostly sober.

You took a deep, shuddering breath and felt Eren wrap his arms around you.

“We’ll make something up and get out of here quickly, I swear.” He whispered, kissing your forehead.

You nodded and took another deep breath before steeling your nerves and walking downstairs.

“There you are,” your mother said, her drawn on eyebrows pinching together when she saw you, “What the fuck is all this?”

Your mind blanked and you started to panic slightly, looking to Eren for help.

“Max asked to barrow some stuff from ________ for a project and since we were all planning on hanging out today, I just decided to drive her.” Eren said, forcing a smile.

Your mother eyed you both for a moment before nodding slowly.

“Whatever. As long as your back in time for our plans tonight.” She said, staring you down.

A chill ran down your spine and squeezed out “Yes ma’am….”

She nodded again and waved her hand dismissively as she walked towards the kitchen. You quickly ran out the door and Eren threw your bags into the back seat. You got in the car and Eren sped the whole way back to his house. Once there, he put your things in his room and you sat down with his mother again.

“So, you’re supposed to work tonight?” She asked, pulling out her phone.

You nodded and watched as she dialed a number.

“Hannes, hi, it’s Carla,” she said, tilting her head a little, “Listen, Grisha and I need a favor.”

She listened for a moment before humming.

“Great,” Carla said, smiling, “You remember Eren’s friend ________, right? Well, turns out her mother is a horrid bitch and has been forcing ________ into sex work for the past few years. She was so scared that she wasn’t able to tell us anything before today when she saw Grisha for an exam. The bitch has also been forcing ________ to take drugs. Is there any way to set her up tonight to get her arrested?”

She listened again and you could faintly hear someone talking on the other end of the line, but you couldn’t make out what they were saying.

“Wonderful. We’ll come by the station when Grisha gets home. Thanks.”

The woman hung up and looked at you with a smile.

“That hag should be in jail tonight.” She said, a sly smirk on her lips.

You were still a little shocked to see this side of Eren’s mother, but you kind of liked it. You smiled yourself and hugged your new mom, thanking her.

“What do we do after she’s arrested?” Eren asked.

“Well, first, since ________ is still 17, your father and I will have to take care of whatever legal paperwork needs to be done to become her guardians. Then, rehab.” Carla said, stroking your hair.

You nodded and reached out for Eren’s hand. He laced his fingers with yours and brought your hand up, kissing it lovingly. You ended up cuddling up with Eren on the couch watching tv with his mother while waiting for your father to get home. Once he arrived, you all got into his car and drove to the police station.

You let out a breath you didn’t know you had been holding as you watched a cop handcuff your mother.

“You little bitch! How dare you do this to me! I’ll make you regret it!!” She screeched, fighting against the cop.

You huffed out a breath and turned away from her, searching for Eren. You spotted him quickly and made your way to him. He hugged you and kissed your forehead. The next step now was rehab. It turns out that your new mom had a friend that ran a really nice rehab facility. And you didn’t have to pay for a thing, since the courts had decided that your biological mother owed you sever hundred thousand dollars for all of the trauma and damages she caused. You kept up with your school work while in rehab, but a little over two weeks into the program, you ended up in the hospital. They called Carla and your family quickly raced over.

“________,” Eren cried, bursting into you room, “Are you ok?! What happened?!”

You smiled tiredly at him and reached out for his hand. He quickly came to your side and held your hand with both of his.

“I miscarried.” You said simply.

Eren’s eyes widened at the news, and he didn’t know how to react, not knowing how you felt.

“How do you feel about the situation?” Your mom asked, sitting next to you on your bed and petting your head.

You smiled sadly and said, “I’m a little sad but, it’s best that this happened. I’m not ready for a baby and I honestly don’t know how I would have handled having a child from that situation. So, I'm ok.”

Eren frowned and said, “You don’t look like you’re ok.”

You laughed lightly and said, “I meant mentally and emotionally. Physically I’m tired as fuck and still in pain. Both from rehab and this. But I really am fine. I’ll be better in no time, I promise.”

Eren sighed lightly but nodded. You leaned up and kissed him gently before resting back in your bed.

Two months later, you were back home with Eren and your new family and you would be graduation high school soon. You were clean and sober a little over two months and you had recovered from the miscarriage completely. Your life was normal now, and you couldn’t be any happier with your boyfriend and your new family.

[annicaax]

Kellan Route Summaries: #Part 2.

(Link to part one will be at the end of this post. Keep reading)

MC looks at Sascha and Fiona who are bickering now, engaged in whatever world they find themselves in. This is a chance she can't let go, MC slips out of the ward HQ, stepping onto the dirt road. Before she knows she's left the Wisp behind, trudging along the deserted gulch. The afternoon heat is sweltering. She adjusts her hat against the sun, realizing that nothing she'd planned had gone as expected. She still hadn't found her horse. And is she truly a ward member?

As she contemplates her current position, she hears footsteps. Whirling around, she finds it's the blond man who'd given her the task of stealing the envelope from Kellan.

She glares at the man when he looks at her questioningly as if he's willing to hear if the task is finished.

"Nice trick. You'd set me up against a law man... And I ain't gonna fall for your smile anymore."

The blond man with shocking pale, white hair, same as hers, smiles.

"Too bad... 'twasn't my intention to get you in trouble. But I suppose it's not an issue considering you're someone with a bounty on her head."

MC glares at the man who's supposed to be her patron. With a smile still on his face, the man reminds her she can't back out of the deal.

MC freaks out a little remembering her discussion with the ward members. Didn't they tell her this man was a demon? Thank the goddess she hadn't struck a deal with a demon.

"I didn't make a deal with you, you freak!"

MC shrieks at him. Before she can say anything further, a shadow passes before her eyes, there stands Kellan, glaring at her blond patron.

"Bold of you to come after me, Caius. You couldn't land a direct hit and tried to use some desperate city girl to get the job done. Too bad, this one's working for me now. You better not bother her from now on. Leave my subordinates alone."

"Who sent you, Caius?" Kellan's voice booms again. "I know you're more than an errand boy. Who are you collaborating with this time?"

MC can only stare at Kellan in awe, feeling his domineering presence. However, it's just her and Caius isn't frazzled.

Caius' answering smile is mysterious.

Caius disappears in a puff of smoke and sparks of fire after uttering those mysterious words. Kellan addresses MC.

"You know the rules, Lord Malphas. My agreement was supposed to be anonymous. And now that I've been busted and intercepted my none other than the man himself... I'll gladly step down, make myself scarce. I admire you for who you are, Kellan. So I'd leave with a warning : they will not stop. They will come after you."

"I don't think he knows you're a witch yet. Being one puts a target behind your back, miss y/n. I'd suggest you to be vigilant. It's better off for you to stop interacting with strangers... and stay close to the ward."

Anger flares up within MC at these words.

"Maybe I'll just skip town. I never wanted to be tied down, captain! It ain't why I ditched New Amster!"

Kellan stares at her, red eyes glowing. He isn't annoyed, just remains calm and steady.

Like Caius, Kellan too disappears, no sparks but fading into thin air, his last words being:

"One can't run forever from their destiny," he says, "but you're free to go find a better, safer place than the ward for you. If you can..."

It's shocking how laid back he can be. MC once again has her jaw dropped.

"I know you'll make the right decision... You'll choose the ward, if you wish to reap your powers and claim your destiny."

MC sighs, walking back to the town.

It doesn't take her much time to realize. Kellan is right. The ward is the rightful place for her. At least until she reaps her powers.

***

Kellan sits in his office. When the doors to the HQ barge open, he half expects it's the little witch who's come back but it's only Cecelia.

"Miss Visconti..."

He greets her formally, burning the envelope he's been reading, the one that the witchling had tried to steal.

"Captain..."

Cecelia greets him back, sounding concerned now as he sets aside his cloak, worried to see him look so stoic.

"What's wrong?"

Kellan responds to her friendly question with a sigh.

"You know, Cecelia. Trouble's always brewing in these wicked times. This time it's big and it's coming for me from the Infernus. I just hope nobody else gets hurt when the hellfire strikes. Nobody from the Ward, not anyone from the town. Nobody..."

Cecelia frowns once and then rebukes her superior who's also kind of her friend for a long time now.

"And what about you... You can't get hurt either, Kellan! We won't let you..."

Kellan remains silent for a moment before smiling and nodding, "of course."

Just then the doors open for a second time. MC enters and faces Kellan with a glint in her eye.

Kellan smiles and nods, acknowledging her presence.

"As you've predicted I'm back captain! Now what?"

"Welcome back, Miss... (y/n). And now you will train with the ward members. Fiona might be able to help you harvest your powers but the rest of the ward will be here for you too..."

Kellan gives her another burning, searing handshake. And then he's gone, saying he has some business to take care of.

***

The next few days, MC tries to accustom to her new life, training with Fiona at the apothecary during the day, helping Donna with her chores in the evening before calling it a night.

One particular day's training has her excited as Fiona helps her with a spell that can locate her horse Whisper.

At first she didn't believe magic existed in her but now she does, and she's about to find her lost horse. Nathan Cayde accompanies her to the plains as they together search for her horse in its supposed location.

Although MC isn't pleased Kellan had forbade her to venture alone outdoors, she snickers at the sight of a grumbling Cayde and at the prospect that the ward captain is overprotective of his crew.

***

Around sunset, she finds whisper. Together with Cayde, she heads back to the town, catching a break with the rest of the ward members and greeting two new gentlemen -- Cinder and Roland.

As Cayde walks her back to her lodgings at Donna's, (looks like Kellan gave the task of watching over her to the ghost cowboy, much to his annoyance and hers) she feels extremely grateful. Everyone in Wisp Willow is welcoming and the town's charming. She thanks Cayde while parting with him, noting that he's a gentleman despite the mouth that runs foul sometimes.

That nights heads to bed, thinking this new life of hers may not be entirely bad at all.

"How long, Malphas? How long would you dawdle?" the masked demon taunts in a low, sonorous voice. "There's no escape from your destiny. Why won't you just play your part so the court can dictate over the human realm, too? The world will be rightfully ours, child, and yours too..."

Meanwhile, Kellan walks through the searing hot desert in the Infernus, hunting for clues, trying to get a hold of the bigger demon Lord whos targeting him, when he runs into a masked demon from the court. It's hard to tell who the demon is. Kellan remains wary, eyeing him suspiciously.

Kellan laughs and then snorts. Ha. He knew the man who's targeting him and the peace of the Wisp and the entire world might only be a major powerful demon.

"Nice try... I don't know what your lord is planning but nothing will happen. The ward will--"

The masked demon interrupts Kellan's speech.

"Ah, the ward! Hmm They've been quite the pain but not anymore. The winds are changing. Are you sure you can stop the tornado coming your way, child? Although you'd make a formidable foe, you must know the truth. You must follow your legacy..."

"I refuse!" Kellan yells, not bothering a few demons are eyeing him weirdly, stopping to glance at him as they pass by. "I refuse to use any dark magic! I will never ever harm any other being. And as the captain of the ward, I'm committed to my oath of saving my people--"

The masked demon chuckles, remarks that it's a pity, makes a big show of letting a huge sigh before disappearing in a burst of flames.

Kellan sighs, rattled by the encounter but a look of steely determination settles back in his eyes. The demons of the Hell might be planning something big, but he will spoil them time and again.

AN: more coming soon.

Link to part one :

Like, reblog, comment. I'd like to hear from you all. thank you for reading.

[grelleswife]

For the character ask game could you do Othello?? :)

Of course! Sorry for the late reply!

1. My first impression of them.

Some combination of, "funky little dude!" and "oh boy...another manga character involved with STEM who wears a lab coat 24/7 so we as the audience know without the shadow of a doubt that he's a mad scientist." 😂

2. When I think I truly started to like them.

Watching his friendly interactions with Grelle. Even in the manga, Grelle often contends with physical violence or snide remarks from other characters, so it was a relief to finally see a reaper other than Ronald who was nice to her. :')

3. A song that reminds me of them.

Although this is technically part of an anime OST rather than a song, "L's Theme" from Death Note.

4. How many people I ship them with.

Grelle and Ronald (either individually or as a polycule). I think he and Sascha could also make an adorable couple. He and Undertaker share a complex shared history and had an acrimonious breakup.

5. My favorite ship of them.

Grellthello! It's a fun dynamic—the sassy nerd who constantly banters with (and simps over) his powerful, glamorous girlfriend. ❤️💚

6. My least favorite ship of them.

Nothing really comes to mind? Othello doesn't receive as much attention from the fandom as characters like trash demon, but the silver lining is that we have fewer cursed ships for this geeky reaper.

7. A quote of them that you remember.

I'm not quoting verbatim since I've seen a couple of different translations for this line, but the part where he and Grelle confront Undertaker, and Othello smirks that it's time to get on with the renegade death god's "spanking/scolding." That dialogue coupled with his impish expression gave me a good chuckle...and do y'all see what I mean about the bitter exes energy he and Undertaker have? Also, what kinds of shenanigans did you and White hair-chan get up to back in the day, Othello? 👀

8. Your favorite outfit of them.

His cute bellhop uniform from that 2020 Black Label pop up store!

9. Your least favorite outfit of them.

Although I like his dorky outfit in canon, that lab coat bugs me to no end because you shouldn't stroll around the city wearing your PPE!!! That article of clothing is called a lab coat for a reason. Sir, are you really going to bring it back to your research space after it's been contaminated with God knows what?! 😭😭😭

10. Describe the character in one sentence.

A cheeky, eccentric, and somewhat mysterious reaper forensic scientist with a fearless penchant for munching licorice and wearing slippers with his socks on.

11. What's the first thing you think about when thinking about the character?

His crazy hair! 😂

12. Sexuality headcanon!

Could be ace, aro, demi, or some combination thereof, but he definitely isn't straight.

13. Your favorite friendship they have.

His partnership with Grelle!

14. Best storyline they had; 15. Worst storyline they had.

The verdict's still out on these two questions, mainly because we just haven't spent enough time with him for me to compare his role across different arcs. We'll see how things shake out a few years down the line!

16. A childhood headcanon.

Othello was often bullied as a child due to his weak, scrawny frame and bookish tendencies, which caused him to turn inward and made it difficult for him to form close attachments with his peers.

17. What do you think their first word was?

"Ribbit," learned from when his mom was teaching him about the sounds different animals make (I headcanon that frogs are one of Othello's favorite animals).

18. How do you think they were like as a kid?

As mentioned above, I think Othello ended up a loner who read voraciously and developed a keen interest in the natural sciences. Much to his mother's horror, he was fascinated by death, and furtively dissected a few animal corpses (i.e. deceased cats he found on the side of the road) because he wanted to better understand how their anatomy worked. Kidthello kept several pet frogs, salamanders, and other amphibians, stealthily hiding them from his mama. He strongly preferred to wear loose, baggy clothing made out of soft fabric, for sensory reasons, and also had several quirks in his eating habits (i.e. lining up cherry pits in rows, pitching a fit if his green peas touched the potatoes on his plate, etc.). Despite his considerable intellect, Othello remained a mediocre student because he only applied himself toward subjects that piqued his curiosity, eschewing dull textbooks and rote memorization in favor of his late-night, amateur attempts at research.

19. The most random ship you've seen people have with them.

Othello x Blavat Sky. They both have chaotic energy, distinctive character designs, and copious amounts of gender, but my short king deserves better than that smarmy fortune teller. 😤

20. A weird headcanon.

Othello is a pretty decent ventriloquist and freaked the other reapers out by bringing his dummy to an office party.

21. When do you think they were at their happiest?

When he was given his own laboratory. Othello now had access to resources he couldn't have envisioned in his wildest dreams as a mortal, and centuries (if not millenia!) in which to explore the questions which intrigued him.

22. When do you think they were at their lowest?

Immediately prior to becoming a reaper. I headcanon that Othello's backstory shares certain similarities with that of Shakespeare's tragic protagonist; namely, that he murdered his wife after a false, manipulative "friend" tricked him into thinking she had committed adultery when in fact she was innocent. Othello had been deeply hurt by this misguided belief because he'd truly fallen in love with his spouse, finally discovering someone who accepted him. Upon realizing his grievous error, the scientist was stricken with remorse and killed himself.

23. Future headcanon.

Grelle often takes Othello with her to attend Pride parades in the mortal realm, and they make eachother little bead bracelets using their respective pride flag colors. >w<

24. What do you think is a secret they have that they have never told anyone?

Othello curled up on his bed and cried for hours the night that he and Undertaker separated, only to put on a nonchalant act the next day and pretend like the relationship had never been that big a deal, anyway. He takes rejection hard but usually isn't comfortable admitting as much.

25. When do you think they acted the most OOC?

I don't think we know him well enough to say for certain yet.

26. When do you think they were being "themselves" the most?

While I suspect that he might be hiding something, my impression is that Othello doesn't give a damn about others' opinions of him and is unrepentantly himself, even if others judge his peculiar mannerisms and behavior.

27. If they could meet a character from another show/movie/etc., who would be the most fun for them to meet?

Dr. Doofenshmirtz from Phineas and Ferb. Oh, the glorious chaos that would ensue...

28. The most unnecessary thing they ever did?

Eat licorice. I love you, king, but that stuff tastes VILE.

29. How do you think they would be as a parent?

Honestly, I think Othello would be much better off as the fun uncle who pops by every now and then to visit the kids and give them cool presents. While he would genuinely love his children, he'd probably be so absorbed in his theories and research that they'd inadvertently be excluded from his reclusive bubble, placing most of the burden of their daily care on his partner(s)

30. The funniest scene they had?

When he threw his death scythe at Undertaker...only for the "attack" to devolve into a comical failure! XD As Miss Grelle remarks (I see you breaking the fourth wall, Yana), it would have made sense for this moment to reveal a ferocious strength beneath Othello's unassuming facade. Instead, we see that the geek from Forensics probably shouldn't be wielding anything larger than a pipette! 😆😆😆

[ruvviks]

❗️🍂💥🎉🎮 for artyom and sascha pls 🧡

HOGH THANK U my sweet boys... time to put them in the microwave

❗️ what is important to them?

sascha is <3 artyom's other friends are as well, but he prioritizes sascha over anyone else and would go great lengths to keep him safe. though recently he's also started to prioritize his own wellbeing as well and you know what. good for him

fun is also very important to artyom. he wants to do a lot of things and learn a lot of things but he most of all just wants to have a good time :) and he wants others to have a good time as well <3

🍂 what outfits would they wear in different seasons?

artyom generally just wears his academy uniform when on academy grounds. while traveling with the party he swaps it for more comfortable clothing; pants of soft fabric and a shirt with a deep cut and lace, or just. any shirt that shows a bit of cleavage LMFAO he's like that <3 he looks very good in it

when it gets colder, he covers up a bit more but still wears little layers. he has infernal heritage so the cold generally leaves him unbothered <3 when it gets hotter, he's just showing more skin. good for him 2.0

💥 fight, flight, freeze, or fawn?

fight. artyom might not be the strongest or the most resilient guy in the world, he will still jump between his friends and incoming danger at any given opportunity

🎉 what do they do when they're excited?

when artyom is excited, he essentially just needs to explode LMFAO he stims a lot and he's just constantly happy stimming when excited, to the point he might even make little sparks of magic with his hands :) <3 he also just talks super super fast and his accent gets a lot thicker so you'll have to put in some effort to understand him

🎮 what do they do in their free time?

spar with callinan, work on spells with lorelei, cause problems on purpose with berry and teacup, hang out with sascha, read, work on his spellcasting focus, bake or cook, work on his other inventions, play with his weasels (oatmeal and bean), watch the sunrise/sunset, take a nap, dance :) <3

❗️ what is important to them?

surprise surprise, artyom is <33 and the rest of the party too, but artyom will always have a very special place in sascha's heart. sascha values his friends' safety above all; he doesn't care if they end up hating him or something like that, he just wants them to be safe and will do anything to achieve that

knowledge is also important to sascha. it's a vital part of his entire character with like. the whole "cthulhu showed him all the secrets of the universe" thing and all that. but he also just thinks it's important to continue learning new things, to always strive to be a more educated person each day no matter how big the thing that you learned is

🍂 what outfits would they wear in different seasons?

much like artyom, sascha also just wears his academy uniform on academy grounds. while traveling with the party, he still tends to wear similar clothing as their uniform, but with light leather armor and an overcoat on top. when it gets colder (either because of seasons or just. the country they're in at that moment) he switches to hide armor and fur in his clothing, and when it gets warmer he drops some layers and might even switch to something short sleeved if he's feeling spicy (usually not)

💥 fight, flight, freeze, or fawn?

freeze. sascha isn't one to run away, but generally combat situations tend to cause him to freeze first, and he needs a moment (one or two rounds of combat) to snap out of that before he can go into fight mode

🎉 what do they do when they're excited?

when sascha is excited he becomes a bit more expressive and will talk a LOT more than usual! he's usually very reserved, but when he gets excited he'll have very little control over his infodump mode so he might just talk about magic to you for four hours LMFAO

he also tends to smile a lot more :) he doesn't smile a lot because he usually just. doesn't really see the point in it even when he's SUPER happy he doesn't always smile. but when he's excited he has also very little control over that so he'll be :D all the time <3

🎮 what do they do in their free time?

hang around other members of the party in silence just to keep them company, read, write in his journal, write down research, spend time with artyom, help vatha clean their weapons, help ward with magic-related stuff, practice his own spellcasting, [redacted], organize his belongings, stargaze :) <3

oc asks!

[suspiciouslyheterosexualbehavior]

TF2 classes rated by how well I’d do against them in a 1v1 fistfight

I woke up this morning feeling particularly arrogant and in my hubris I have decided to make a list where I completely accurately rate how well I’d do in a barehanded, no-weapons, classic caveman fisticuffs against the mercenaries. Let’s begin.

Scout: Were it not for Merasmus, this idiot would be the lowest on the food chain. He is spindly, and granted he is fast and can double jump, he probably weighs half as much as me. If I sat on this guy I’d win.

Final verdict: 0/10, I will break you like a biscuit, little boy

Soldier: This one’s all about strategy. There is no way I would win against a man that Rocket Jumps so regularly he probably uses it as a means to go to the grocery store in a completely fair fight. I seek to win, and so does he, and he might do it by snapping my neck like I’d snap Scout’s fragile ankles, and that means I’ll have to use my brain before he does so. If I tell him there’s something amazing behind him throughout the entire fight, he will fall for it every time, granting me victory.

Final verdict: 5/10, Really hope we’re gonna be wrestling around naked and covered in honey for this one

Pyro: Maybe I would avoid hurting a wonderful little frog like this if I wasn’t absolutely bathing in hubris as of right now, but since I am, I’ll tell you that I am looking at this one and I know I can win, so long I keep my language clean and don’t make fun of fire. Which is easy, since I love fire type Pokemon.

Final Verdict: 3/10, Just because everyone else is scared of you doesn’t mean I have to be

Demoman: Oh, this one might get tricky. Any idiot would think that as long as Demo is drunk, they can win, but Demo is always drunk, you fucking dumbass. Not a day goes by without him being absolutely wasted, and he has a canonically beautiful and romantic relationship with his liver, so waiting for him to die from liver failure won’t work either. Plus, this guy definitely has been in bar fights. He’s probably an expert on drunken fighting at this point. Though if I can make him fall asleep and forget why he was fighting me in the first place, I could probably win.

Final Verdict: 7/10, I can still win, especially if I also get wasted

Heavy: Yeah, listen. I’m pumped full of the kind of stuff that God-slaying anime protagonists bleed before the final boss battle. But Heavy? I can’t win. Sascha weighs several times my own weight, and this guy pulls her around all day like a fucking accessory bag. Oh, don’t worry, I’ll absolutely try to win, but my chances of Heavy continuously fucking up throughout the fight, as if God is rolling Nat 1s for his every check, are pretty low. He’s not even that stupid, so I can’t trick him more than once or twice. I’ll have one chance to go for his weak legs, because I know he skips leg day, but after that? If I haven’t felled him? I’m going to get thrown like a beach ball.

Final Verdict: 10/10, If I start crying maybe he’ll feel bad enough and let me win by default

Engineer: Now I am an Engineer main and simp, I really like this guy a lot, so entering a fight with nothing but out hands as weapons would, for most people, seem like a loss no matter what for me. Not so, idiots; I love fighting my beloved ones in an old-timey fashion, and it won’t change this time just because I happen to be in love with Mister Dell Cohnager. Engie is a laid-back nerd, so his strength, while heavily amplified by his mechanical hand, is lacking. On top of that, I’m 99% he’s a lot shorter than me, and since I’m a Jock, I will have a natural advantage over him in a fight. He unfortunately has an advantage over me by having a sexy Texan drawl and a deep voice, and if he smiles I might actually fucking die, so it’s a bit of a 50-50.

Final Verdict: 5/10, That helmet wont save you from these hands, but neither will my hands save me from that Cowboy Charm of yours

Sniper: While this man isn’t exactly incompetent, he’s still only right above Scout in regards to strength by my totally accurate calculations. He’s skinny, and most of the time he doesn’t even move around like Scout does, but pisses in a jar while waiting to shoot someone in the head from very far away. Since we’ll be going at it barehanded, I have an actual proper chance of decking this guy, and if I am feeling especially cruel, I can use his crippling depression against him to win by default. And I do feel cruel right now.

Final Verdict: 1/10, Get some therapy and come back to me for a rematch, buddy

Medic: As similar with Engineer, I do actually like this guy a bunch, but I don’t have a crush on him. Unfortunately, I’m a Tank main by heart, and while I don’t main Heavy, the urge to protect Healers from harm is stronger than my urge to hurt them. Should I somehow override this base instinct and become like those smelly little French backstabbers that feel no remorse at flaying Medics from behind, I might win against Medic in a fair fight. I wouldn’t know what to use against him psychologically, but I know he will be trying to do it to me. Whether it works or not is up to the unforgiving tides of fate.

Final Verdict: 4/10, I don’t know if I’ll feel great punching a guy with glasses, but Medic will be in Hell with me once we both die, so I can just apologize there

Spy: If I see a spy or suspect someone is one, I will maul them like a bear. I have something personal against them, yes, maybe because I’m an Engineer and Medic main, but that’s besides the point, really. I know I can absolutely win in a fight against this man, even if he had his watch and knife. Stab me in the back all you want, buddy, but I’m not stopping till either your kneecaps or your windpipe is crushed.

Final Verdict: 0/10, Fuck you I’m going to pee on your suit