#SORRY NOT SORRY GUYS! I'M THRILLED ABOUT THIS MOVIE. IT'S A DREAM COME TRUE FOR ME!

[the-ninjago-historian]

I need Live Action Garmadon to look badass. Big scary beast man. Lol.

GO FULL ON ONI BEAST!👹👹👹👹👹 Make him SCARY!

[forthegothicheroine]

terribly sorry if this is a bother, but i would Love to hear your ranking of the Into the Dark movies.

Looking at the big list, it looks like I actually missed a couple, so this is my ranking of the ones I did see. Some incidental spoilers.

19. Treehouse

Man, of all the horror movies not to kill off the main character...

18. Uncanny Annie

Working with board games for a living, there is so much more you could have done with the idea of an evil board game than just giving it a creepy little girl horror host! Make fun of Arkham Horror and its intricate and convoluted rules system, where the players die if they forgot one stupid expansion special rule! Or do a low budget adaptation of LJ Smith's Forbidden Game, that would kick ass.

17. They Come Knocking

There's just nothing really to say about this movie, which is a shame because the Black Eyed Kids are very visually creepy, and the idea of them haunting an RV where you can't easily escape them has a lot of promise. It shouldn't be trite and boring. Alas.

16. The Body

This was apparently based on a short film, and that makes sense, since after we learn the genuinely entertaining premise it kind of devolves into padding. I will give it points for a hot villain, even if he's bargain basement Johnny Lee Miller playing bargain basement Patrick Bateman.

15. Good Boy

Great premise, mediocre execution. I love the idea that a dog can also be a werewolf, and I love taking the fact that dogs react when their owners are anxious to a deadly conclusion, but the movie just sort of petered out instead of going somewhere.

14. All That We Destroy

This should probably be higher up since it's very well made, but I hate the main characters. True, I am supposed to hate the main characters. Still, if I'm supposed to hate the main characters and I do hate the main characters, is that good or bad?

13. Down

I was conflicted about where to put this on the list since I love the first half and hate the latter half. Turning a romantic comedy premise into a bottle episode thriller is done really well, with the tension rising as we see the truth behind these characters past their sexual chemistry, but then it becomes a psycho chase movie, and just a meh one at that. Maybe just watch it until the reveal.

12. Midnight Kiss

This is just kind of a basic slasher (or a giallo? Maybe that's a better word for it, what with the black gloves and the fact that the killer has an actual motive), but I've rethought it upon reading reviews pointing out how cool it is to have a shlocky genre movie about gay people. They don't get killed because they're gay, the bad guy isn't a bad guy because he's gay, but the gay characters and setting are still vital to the plot, and that is indeed pretty cool. And even before considering these things, it's fun with a stylish bad guy costume.

11. A Nasty Piece of Work

This one is basically a worse version of the movie Cheap Thrills, but it has Julian Sands and is arguably less of a bummer, so that's not nothing. I wouldn't be surprised if evil rich people forcing their workers to perform increasingly fucked up things for monetary prizes becomes its own whole genre.

10. Pooka

This one is has actual ambition, artistry and a very creepy monster design, but I don't like movies that tell you two thirds of the way through that it was all a dying dream and didn't really matter. I don't even like Mullholland Drive.

9. Flesh & Blood

This one should probably be lower down since it's not breaking any new ground and you can instantly see where it's going, but I have a special appreciation for it because in my opinion, it handled its plot much better than critically acclaimed Hannibal handled the very similar Abigail Hobbes plotline. Flesh & Blood understands that a girl rebelling against her emotionally incestuous serial killer father figure is her goddamn story, not something to make some other man sad.

8. Pure

Very genuinely creepy! Even creepier knowing it's only barely an exaggeration of actual father-daughter purity pledges! But I actually think it might have worked better without the supernatural angle; all the most disturbing and striking moments were the mundane ones.

7. Crawlers

Am I the only one who likes this movie? It has bad reviews on letterboxd but I thought it was fun! I like the drug-dealing survivalist heroine, I find her narration very entertaining, and I was satisfied with the concluding 'spot the imposter' test with the shapechanging aliens. They could have done more with the pub crawl premise, though (I think the movie Grabbers is supposed to do that better.)

6. School Spirit

As soon as I saw that this was a slasher movie pastiche of The Breakfast Club I was fully on board. (The kids are arguably more sympathetic than their Breakfast Club counterparts!) The villain reveal gets a little silly, but I appreciate the Psycho reference, and the final girl's speech to the killer is absolutely iconic.

5. Pilgrim

The first one I saw, cheesy yet engaging enough to make me want to see all the others! I would watch a whole franchise about either the villain or the final girl. (I also want to mention that I like how Into the Dark's colorblind casting gives us a mixed race family with a black heroine, which adds some unspoken subtext to her conflict with the pilgrims.) I should request this for Yuletide one of these years.

4. New Year New You

This was a very good thriller riding on its very realistic villain; most of us don't personally know a Jason Voorhees, but plenty of us know childhood bullies and all of us know of loathesome influencers. Unfortunately, the realistic characters make the increasingly unrealistic easy kills and resolution harder to accept. Still worth watching. And it's cool that it has an all-female cast!

3. Culture Shock

I probably would have enjoyed this more if I hadn't spoiled myself for the twist, but it was still very good! It's very interesting how it turns from a gritty real-world thriller to a full on Twilight Zone episode. The way classic Americana becomes grotesque reminds me of the Fallout games, which in this case is a compliment. And it actually had something to say, which not enough horror movies do.

2. I'm Just Fucking With You

This one is the best actual horror movie, genuinely disturbing and scary. The line between petty internet trolling and cold-blooded sadism gets blurrier and blurrier. It lets you know that if you actually met the Joker you would fucking hate him.

1. Pooka Lives

This is probably not actually the best movie, but as a former reader of Slenderman blogs it warmed my heart. (You don't have to watch the first Pooka movie, though the tonal shift is artistically interesting.) It's such a funny take on the evolution of creepypasta, plus Rachel Bloom kills Will Wheaton! This is what I want from low-budget horror comedy.

[punkscowardschampions]

Ali & Tommy

Ali: TOM BOMB Ali: you will never guess what Tommy: you're adopted? CALLED IT Tommy: too fabulous for those heathens Ali: way to make my actual news look less 😏 Ali: isn't don't oversell it like rule #1 Ali: [sends cast list so its all official] Tommy: darling, breaking every rule is rule #1 Tommy: you ain't that adopted Tommy: OH MY SWEET LORD! YOU BETTER NOT BE TROLLING ME ALISON Tommy: I know your genius extends to photoshop pro but you mustn't use it for such evil Ali: who would I really be hurting with that troll, huh Ali: no one but myself Ali: but if its good enough for Queen Meryl 😁😁😁 Tommy: Preach it sister Ali: I'm so fucking excited I could burst Tommy: Meanwhile my school is putting Fanny and Alexander Tommy: like that Ingmar Bergman fever dream can or should be adapted for the stage Tommy: Jesus Christ Ali: we LOVE child abuse for a fun family night out Ali: guess the parentals like to be shown their money is being spent SERIOUSLY on SERIOUS theatré Tommy: The guardian voted it 8th best arthouse film OF ALL TIME therefore it must be worthy Tommy: I will not hesitate to put on a wig and replace you, Kit Tommy: before I do, 1 question Tommy: WHY AND HOW THE FUCK IS MEENA'S BROTHER NOT PLAYING THE SWEDISH LOTHARIO?!! Tommy: what is your casting director 🚬? Ali: I dread to think what 9 and 10 were 😏 Ali: must put them on my not-to-watch list Ali: 😂 Ro literally called it, we all know, I will uninvite you if you even THINK of upstaging me 😉 Ali: IKR its so funny Ali: maybe he thought he was being subversive casting a black guy Ali: but then I wouldn't have my role if that was his jam so 🤷 go off Tommy: Yeah HARD same 🙄😴 Tommy: you can try but I've sent a congrats text to Carls and she'll re-invite me Tommy: if he was the baby daddy the whole island would know but alright, like Ali: also true Ali: 😂 SERIOUSLY Ali: like hmm, I wonder where this white blonde blue eyed baby came from Ali: when you get diverse with your casting and the plot falls apart 😏 god bless, they're trying Tommy: that's WHY he cast Drew, he's being very catholic and trying to marry you off to the right man at the end Tommy: Sir you can't be deciding he's the daddy like that, how dare you! Ali: and that's WHY he cast me as Donna Ali: knows our ma won't flip out on the implication her daughter hoe'd around all summer and has no idea who fathered her child Ali: the subtle shade of it all Tommy: 😂 Tommy: I can't wait to see her go full Molly Weasley when she realises the plot of the thing Tommy: my Alison COULD NEVER you wanker! Tommy: would never 'cause you'd be in chains 😏 Ali: that's the other possibility, he hasn't clocked I'm GayLite and he thinks the idea I'm knocked up is right jokes Ali: Ma wishes 🤞🤞🤞 Tommy: Or he's calling out his biphobia and everyone who is as a HUGE whore Tommy: that's awkward Ali: when you don't prove the haters wrong 😬 Ali: whoops Tommy: When's opening night? I gotta see this Ali: duh, I've already begged on your behalf Ali: [the date] Tommy: I'm so ready for my handbags at dawn moment with Robbie Tommy: always a pleasure Tommy: unlike witnessing Drew outdoing Pierce Brosnan as the hottie who can't hold a note and DYING on stage Ali: I'll hold your earrings, babe Ali: if he can wait for the show to be over Ali: and don't be mean 🤫 Ali: he...needs some work Ali: but I'm willing to be like your worst teacher on speed about it, have him west end ready in, however many weeks they're giving us Tommy: Cheers, 'course I was born ready whenever he wants to go though 🥊🩰 Tommy: You know I'm here if you need me, fairy gaybrother and all Tommy: he will go to the (disco) ball! Ali: I'll let him know as much 😏 Ali: 💚 Ali: Luckily the choreo is simple, so he's got that down Ali: and how hard is it to pretend you're in love with me, honestly Ali: the singing though Tommy: how many songs does he have? Are they staying movie true? Ali: WELL, the tea is we've already cut a me him duet flashback to a solo for moi, but he HAS to do SOS to drive the plot, then its minimal lines on Our Last Summer, which Robbie is THRILLED about obvs, but he also HAS to do When All Is Said And Done, though maybe I can convince the director that'd work better as a toast moment legit, sans singing Tommy: Fucking hell Tommy: yeah unless there's somebody he could mime for Tommy: or a girl they could drag up to resemble him for the musical numbers Ali: REALLY go in and make it obvious who the dad is 😂 Ali: comes to something when the only viable option is the out out gay kid Tommy: SOS is gonna be brutal but I reckon you're onto something cutting the last number down Tommy: by then the audience will either be LIVING for you or DYING over him and we all know how the drama dept would rather it Tommy: arts funding is already in the bog, like Ali: Truly... fuck it, if we don't get it then instead of taking turns at a verse each we'll do it together and I will belt the fuck out of it Ali: you don't have to tell me, the wardrobe is abhorrent Ali: but we're already on that, even if I have to dress the entire cast myself Tommy: Christ alive, I will come home early and help you save the show, bags full of stolen props and costumes Tommy: Sorry not sorry, mother Ali: Oh LORDT, what even is the costuming for fucking Ali: fanny and whathisface Ali: I bet you are LIVING Tommy: Everyone here has now said fuck it and we're sorting out watching Mamma Mia Tommy: the girls and gays are 💔😭 Tommy: Straight Simon alone is unaffected Tommy: SEND HELP ALL MY MATES ARE ASKING IF DREW'S TOO WHITE TO TURN SOS INTO A RAP 😂 Ali: that boy is an enigma Ali: do not encourage him PLEASE 😭😭😭 Ali: all for mixing it up but if I have to look 💔 at a boy rapping about what happened to our love...nah Ali: even Meryl couldn't Tommy: Quick, dish on the rest of your all star cast, that'll 100% work in amusing them Tommy: any room to judge and they don't give a fuck about a single thing else Ali: Oh well, let's see Tommy: I'm the proudest of my sweet baby Carls and know she'll be grand, but the people are restless and thirsty for that hot tea Ali: Rosie's a sweetie, she jams with us on the drums every now and then, so you'd recognize her face not her name, she's gonna be so funny, perf for that role so I can't slag on her, I'm afraid darlings Ali: right?! MY BABY 💕 Ali: we did our auditions in groups of about 3 so it was just me, her and Cavante, she killed it forreal Tommy: Yeah? I do remember her! She comments on many o' Meena posts and you can hear the 🍀 Tommy: I'm gonna call her later, Carls that is, not your drummer Ali: I'm DYING for her to give the brummie a go, if that's as hilariously bad as we're all imagining, I'll send that to quench your mates thirst 🍵 Tommy: You're a star on so many levels Ali: 🥰 Ali: Who else DON'T you know? 🤔 Ali: the girls playing Meena's friends, me either Ali: they're her year though Ali: one of them has the good=loud vibe so I wouldn't be surprised if she went to one of your theatre groups as a kid Tommy: The lad in her year too? I dunno him Ali: Yes, which is rude Ali: he's got hot over the summer clearly 'cos like, HELLO? Ali: he's decent though, fair craic Tommy: Every show needs a dark horse Ali: they're cute Ali: some of his friends, esp. the one Carls has to seduce are 😬 Ali: thank God she's talented Tommy: at least some fuckers'll have chemistry Tommy: you'll be full Meryl-ing to convince ANYONE that Drew's the love of your life Tommy: and Carly would never waste a second on a younger lad Ali: at least I get to be fuming at him most the time Ali: lying cheating bastard 😏 Tommy: 👀🔪 Tommy: I'm well jealous Ali: I know, babes, I know Tommy: less gutted now this sing-a-long is kicking off Tommy: you wanna be facetimed in? Ali: um YES Ali: counts as a rehearsal Tommy: [does call her so she can join]

[kassverse2eletricboogaloo]

The Battle For Subcon Ch 1

(This is my first AHIT Fanfiction! So far i'm having a lot of fun writing again. As it's been awhile. I hope I'm doing well with it! And look, I did that fanfiction idea! Oh! And that cover art is mine!)

Chapter 1: Vacation time!

Hat Kid swiveled in her little chair. Scanning the galaxy. It's barren expanse sneering back. When she was younger her dreams consisted of only the hope to see the stars. She didn't ever think of what would happen when she got there. But she never imagined it like this. It never seemed good enough. Hat Kid deeply longed for some change.

There was no fun among the stars. Sure, it was pretty. Many people would dream of seeing it for themselves (just like she had herself), but now this was a daily occurrence. Like waiting for ages to see a movie, loving it, and then not wanting to see it again. There was not going to be any surprises. You'd know what was about to happen. It was always going to be that way. Nothing ever changed in the movie. A set pathway, much like fate and time.

She didn't realize how much she needed that mafia to break open her window. She had really needed the thrill. It had been 6 whole months since that happened. 4 and a half since she was last on the planet when dealing with the Nyakuza. Which she still regarded as one of her most exciting adventures.

At this point she felt terrible for not returning. She didn't even bother to visit! Who did that!? Her bestest best friends where down there. She didn't even send a card! Space mail existed, though she didn't think the planet had a proper postal code. But even if! She usually went by the planet! How could one day really put her off schedule? Did the job or schedule mean that much?! Hat Kid sighed after her little rant. They may have tried to kill her at one point, but that's what friends do!

She wasn't without reason though. Hat Kid did have a job to do. As a professional space explorer, her job was to visit the outer rim and find new life. After mapping and exploring a few planets, she'd return with her data and relics and then head back to where she left off. . . Which always would go by the plant. Aug!

But this time was different! Hat Kid was on vacation! She could actually go and have fun again! And oh boy did she know where she'd go! Hat Kid pressed a few buttons on her control panel and set the coordinates.

"MAFIA TOWN HERE I COME!" The excited child shouted with glee.

This would be the best vacation yet! She was sure of it! Arepping the ship, Hat Kid pushed it into fill throtal. The engine humming as it blasted into hyper speed. The little alien smiled and jumped off her captians chair. Running to the telescope she used when she first went to Mafia Town. Adrenaline rushing at the thought of seeing everyone again.

Finally! After three whole hours of bouncing up and down, coming up with things to do, and thinking of what she'd say as an apology for her unceremonious departure , the ship halted. It was finally time! Hat Kid pounced at the telescope. So excited she hit her head by accident. HK stumbled and rubbed the spot where it hit her. Quite mad that she couldn't hold in her energy. The alien teleported down to the planet. Down to exactly where she first arrived on the planet. The streets of Mafia Town!

The kids nose picked up on the scent of warm garbage. Jeez, they never cleaned did they? Not only that, she caught dirt on her shirt! C'mon! She'd have to clean that later. Hat Kid acrually forgot how gross this place could be. The small child jogged into town. Desperate to get out of that alley way and to the slightly cleaner street.

She saw Mafia going about their days as usual. A few waving to her as she passed. One offering a game of patty cake. Though Hat Kid wasn't falling for that again! Another Mafia with funny sunglasses was freaking out after the sudden appearance of her space ship.

"Oi, what are YOU doing back here?" Stammered a voice from above. A hint of annoyance in its tone.

Hat Kid smiled. A girl in a read hood lept down from her perch. Standing in front of Hat Kid, the girl looked a bit upset. Super tired too, it seemed. Bags forming under her eyes.

"Did I miss much?" The little hatted child asked in concern. Her "friend", Mustache Girl, wasn't as happy as she hoped.

"Oh a fair bit! You missed everything!" The mustached menace cried "That blasted Mafia Boss disappeared! And the Mafia are growing in numbers! Yet somehow there even better at thwarting me!" Mustache Girl's temper and frustration flaring. Her voice speeding up into a ramble. It was Hat Kid's fault she didn't stop all the bad guys!

Somehow the Mafia where getting MORE coordinated. And less would dissappear when visiting other places on the planet! Mustache Girl couldn't help but wonder what they where doing. They weren't even doing anything differently! They hadn't been getting any smarter. Was she doing something wrong? This little hatted hourglass hoarder probably knew everything!

"It's not like you helped! You where probably in on it weren't you?! You barely help with anything!!" Mustache Girl shouted.

That was a tad hurtful for the first few minutes back, Hat Kid thought.

"Is Cooking Cat still around?" She pondered.

"Who?" Mustache Girl asked quizzically.

"I guess not." HK responded, not worried. "I'll see you later friend!" She beamed. Getting a grunt in response. With that, she teleported back to base.

Though confused, Hat Kid wasn't very scared. Weirder things could have happen. The Mafia Boss was still in a jar, and for all anyone knew he was only misplaced. So it's not like she had much to worry about. Even if he had somehow found a way to "fix the Mafia". She also wasn't worried for Cooking Cat. Who's cooking know how could probably end entire wars!

Hat Kid ran to the Machine Room next. Missing the rumbustious Conductor and the quixotic DJ! She was sure they'd miss her too. They always seemed to like having her around, even if The Conductor tried to stab her. Maybe they would allow her to star in movies again! Readying her trusty telescope, she was off once more. To DEAD BIRD STUDIOS!

(Sorry I didn't write longer! I'll get to the story's true plot soon enough! I'm quite insecure about my writing abilities. So if you see anything I did wrong and didn't pick up on, I strongly recommend you mention it. It'd be a great help! Anyway, have a good day!)