#SO I'M?? SORRY IF HE DOESN'T SOUND A LOT LIKE PREVIOUS REPLIES? | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

golden-cherry · 8 months ago

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deal - cl16 (25/?)

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Reader

Series Summary: Your whole life has gone to shit. Your boyfriend broke up with you, you just lost your job and the Monegasque, who suddenly stands in your doorway, claims that it’s his apartment.

Chapter Summary: Having lunch with friends always leads to sharing information. And girl, those friends don't hold back.

Warnings: 18+ (mentions of smut), fluff, Kika is the bestest friend on this planet, mentions of Carlos and his girlfriend (yes, I consider this a trigger)

Word Count: 3.3k

series masterlist

previous part

A/N: I just reached 2.6k followers and wow!! thank you so much!!! I love you! and this one is for you!!! feedback is appreciated.

Although it's only a few days until Christmas, the sun is shining so brightly that it's pleasantly warm as you and Kika leave the furniture store. As planned - but still with an uneasy feeling - you have left the almost overflowing shopping cart in front of the checkouts and while Charles pays for your "early Christmas present", you and your friend walk to the restaurant.

"I hope all this stuff fits in the car." Kika curls her mouth into a grin. "The mirror I wrote on the note - you know, the one they have to get from storage - is pretty big."

"I'd like to have your guts," you answer her. "Just picking out a huge mirror without knowing exactly whether it will fit anywhere in our apartment."

Kika grins and points to her brown eyes. "Eye measurement, baby. Those marbles are that big for a reason."

You have to stifle a laugh. "If you say so."

While the Portuguese woman plans where in your room she will place which decoration, your thoughts drift off.

It bothers you a little that Charles wants to spend so much money on you. And for no good reason. "I want you to feel comfortable" was his explanation, which is of course very courteous and loving of him. But you could have bought the things with your own money. At least a small part of it.

Would he expect a similarly expensive gift for Christmas now? If so, what could you get him? What do you give someone who already has everything?

"Are you mad at me?" Kika interrupts your flow of thoughts and grabs your elbow.

Confused, you turn to her. "What?"

"I - I don't know." When she stops, you're forced to stop too. "I didn't tell you that Charles is a famous Formula 1 driver. You - you confided in me about Raphael and I kept you in the dark about your roommate."

You exhale. "Kika..."

"I wasn't a good friend and I'm sorry about that. Charles had asked us all not to tell because he wanted to protect you and enjoy the time with you when he was just Charles to you. Even if it wasn't fair to you. I can understand if you're angry with me and-"

"I'm not angry with you," you interrupt her and smile at her. "You're Charles' friend first and foremost and I can't blame him or you for keeping his secret. It doesn't affect our friendship in the slightest."

"Promise?" Her tone sounds a little more pleased than it did a few moments ago.

You nod. "I promise."

She hooks back into you. "Thank goodness for that. I felt super bad because I couldn't tell you. But it wasn't my secret and it wasn't my place to tell you. And I'm really relieved that you see it the same way." She rests her head on your shoulder as you continue walking.

"So you're a model, huh?" you ask her.

She nods. "Yes. Well, I put a lot of effort into it and it's very tiring at times." Kika shrugs her shoulders. "But because of that - and Pierre, of course - I get to travel a lot and see great places. And I really appreciate that." She looks at you. "Now that you're unemployed -" You give her a dirty look. "Maybe you'd like to take my pictures sometime. And then I can post it on my Instagram and maybe other models will want to book you."

"You haven't seen any of my pictures yet," you reply with a laugh as she grabs your hand and jumps up and down. "Of course we can. We can try it out if you like."

Your friend looks around briefly before letting go of you and moving away from you. "How about now? I know you don't have your camera with you, but you can use my phone. The photos won't be as focused as with a real camera, but it should be enough to get you started."

She hands you her cell phone before standing opposite you against the wall of the house. You watch her uncertainly as she fixes her hair. "Are you sure about this? What if the boys are already waiting for us?"

"Let them." She pulls her black jeans up a little so that they sit loosely on her hips. "It won't take long. And I trust you. So here we go."

While Kika turns, repositions herself and smiles at the camera, you take as many pictures as you can. In between, you adjust her purple cardigan so that it sits in the middle of her narrow shoulders, tell her how her feet should be positioned to emphasize the curves of her body and even tousle her hair once so that a few strands fall loosely into her forehead.

When you look at the pictures after ten minutes and favor three of them, she looks curiously over your shoulder. "They look great. Really outfit of the day vibe." You hand the phone back to her. "I like this one. And this one. You've captured my butt well," she grins and puts the phone in her black handbag before hooking it back up to you. "And now let's go. I'm really hungry and I don't want to keep your tiramisu from you."

Oh well.

Charles' words - "Then lie down on the bed, mon amour. I'd like to see how you look on it" - haunt your mind and the images that appear in your head don't make the situation any easier.

For example, Charles kneeling between your legs and his gaze wandering hungrily over your body. How his hands rest on your thighs to open them a little wider so that he can lie comfortably on his stomach between them. How he slides his fingers under the hem of your panties to slowly pull them off your legs. And the way his mouth moves up from the soft skin of your thighs to where you want it to be. Need it to be. The way he opens his mouth and licks his tongue over his lips before closing the distance between you and -

"Watch out. You start drooling." When you give Kika a confused look, she pokes you in the side. "I didn't know you could daydream about tiramisu."

"I wasn't even thinking about tiramisu," you defend yourself, but Kika doesn't believe a word you say.

"Of course not." You could even hear her grin if you weren't looking at her. She lifts her hand and puts it to your cheek, playfully wiping the non-existent spit from the corner of your mouth. "I hate to repeat myself, but you're really not very good at lying."

You chew the inside of your cheek and look down at your sneakers. "Is it that obvious?"

"That you're totally into tiramisu? Hardly," she replies wryly, but puts her arm around your shoulder. "Let's be honest. A trained eye like mine can spot something like that, but if you're worried about the boys seeing it - you really don't need to worry. They wouldn't even recognize a dessert if you put it right in front of them."

"I just don't know what to do," you confess to her.

Kika purses her lips. "Would you be ready for tiramisu after everything that's happened?"

A question you don't know the answer to. After Raphael's betrayal, you had actually sworn off men for a long time for fear that something similar would happen to you again. You tried to build a wall around your heart, but Charles has broken it down piece by piece and now there is only him. He has spread inside you, in your head and in your heart, and you are hungry for him - a feeling that you have never felt for Raphael before. A feeling that takes you by surprise and overruns you like an avalanche and you are helplessly at its mercy.

"It's not the end of the world if you're ready for it," Kika assures you and her smile is genuine. "And when you're ready to give the tiramisu its real name, I'll be here if you want to talk about it."

You hug your friend tightly, causing her to let out a loud gasp. "Thank you, Kika. Really."

"You don't need to thank me. After all, I'm going to make full use of the mirror in your room soon and use you for your photography skills."

A few minutes later, you arrive at the small restaurant. As you enter through the glass door, you can already see the two men sitting at a table at the back. And Kika was right - apart from the four of you, the restaurant is deserted.

"Where have you been?" asks Pierre as you join them. While Kika sits down opposite her boyfriend, you take the empty seat next to her. "We've been waiting for ages."

"We had to stop for a moment because I wanted to take photos," Kika explains and shows them both one of the pictures you took of her.

Pierre grimaces in amazement. "Very good photos. I hope you tag her in them too."

Playfully indignant, she puts her hand to her cleavage. "Of course! What makes you think I wouldn't do that? It might even land her more photo shoots with other models." She leans in your direction. "But as long as I remain your favorite model, everything's fine."

"You are and always will be my favorite model, Kika," you reply and briefly lean your cheek against the top of her head before she sits up straight again.

While Kika and Pierre argue lovingly, you feel Charles pressing one of his legs against yours under the table. When you look at him, he smiles. "Everything okay?" he asks silently, tilting his head.

You nod. "Everything's perfect." You press your leg against his as well.

The risotto you ordered doesn't taste too bad, even if it is a little more fancy than your typical meals. The boys talk about their sport and you try to understand everything, but when the conversation eventually turns to engines, you stop listening.

You watch Charles as he talks energetically and passionately to his friend about his job, while the French mainly listens. He tries to explain things with his hands, waving them wildly in front of his face, and if you didn't know him, you'd think he was a bit out of his mind. But there is something twinkling in his eyes, a spark that shines brighter and brighter the longer he talks about Formula 1.

It makes him so attractive that you have to swallow.

"How are Carlos and his girlfriend doing?" Kika interjects into the conversation. "I saw on Instagram the other day that they went on a trip together."

You look from Kika to Charles. "Who is Carlos?"

"My teammate at Ferrari. The other driver," he explains briefly with a smile before turning to Kika. "I've seen that too. Santorini or something, wasn't it? It was definitely nice, but let's see how long it lasts."

You have to ask again. " How long will it last? That doesn't sound like you have much faith in the relationship."

Kika, who has taken a sip of her water, puts her glass back on the table. "Unfortunately, this has nothing to do with faith," she explains and takes her cell phone out of her bag. She taps on it a little until she hands it to you.

You see an Instagram page of a Becca, also a model, it seems. 27 years old, model at the Bijou Management agency. Her last post is actually from Santorini and alongside all the pictures of her lolling by the pool is one of her with a man. Carlossainz55 is tagged in the picture.

"When you're famous, it's harder to have a relationship," Pierre continues. "Not everyone is so lucky and falls in love with someone who is a good match for them. Sometimes rumors surface about people that aren't true, but still damage reputations. And to counteract this, some people go into relationships that put them in a good light."

You look around in confusion. "So it's a marketing strategy? So that people can sell themselves better?"

Charles nods. "These PR relationships are very conspicuous and usually easy to see through, but even then they distract from the actual rumor."

"And Carlos and Becca are in one of those PR relationships?" Your friends nod. "And what's the rumor that needs to be put to rest?"

Charles bites the inside of his cheek. "Carlos was with a young, super-nice woman for years. When they broke up, there was a rumor that he had a secret family and even a son. That this was the reason for the break-up. And that triggered a few conversations at Ferrari." He shrugs his shoulders. "And then they pulled Becca in for him."

You furrow your eyebrows. "Pulled her in? How do you find someone to willingly agree to a fake relationship like that?"

Kika catches your attention. "Some racing teams have a cooperation with certain modeling agencies for such cases. Which of course makes the whole thing even more conspicuous. But just think how much publicity the girlfriends get from it. It definitely doesn't hurt the modeling job."

"But you also have to understand that millions of euros are attached to a driver's reputation," Pierre explains. "Fans buy tickets to see their favorite driver. They buy merchandise like shirts, caps or whatever to show their loyalty. And loyalty is not exactly low. Ask Charles. One priest has his whole Instagram page dedicated to him."

As you look at your roommate, he can only nod. "That's true. Fans put their favorites on pedestals, praise them to the skies and would defend them to the bitter end. But a rumor that is so serious and has consequences like falling sales figures - anything is better than fans who refuse to support their favorites."

"And why do you think it won't be good for much longer?" Charles looks nervously around the room as if he doesn't know what to say, and his friends also avoid your gaze and your question. "Guys, I don't know these people. So, whatever you tell me - I can't do anything with the information anyway. Is there another woman?"

"It's not exactly another woman," Kika mumbles into her glass and all heads turn in her direction. "What is it? Like she's going to run to the nearest news agency and tell them that the Spanish Ferrari driver isn't exclusively into women."

You raise your hands placatingly. "In case it's not clear - of course I'll keep everything that's said around the table to myself. I'm not crazy and risking our friendship."

"I didn't expect anything else," Charles replies with a smile that could melt glaciers. "I couldn't bear it if we weren't friends anymore either."

As you look at him and mindlessly lick your lips, you feel Kika's elbow gently on your arm.

"What do you think? Do you fancy some tiramisu?"

Your gaze lingers on Charles and when he presses his leg a little harder against yours, your breath hitches. "I'm craving it."

And indeed. The tiramisu isn't as good as the one at the restaurant where you met Kika and Pierre, but it comes close. You try to look away from Charles, but every time you look at him, his eyes are already on you. Something that makes you even more nervous than it should.

When you get into the car a short time later, unnoticed, you glance briefly over the seats back into the trunk. "Where's the new bed?"

Charles straps himself in and has the seat belt fastened against his torso. "They'll deliver it between Christmas and New Year and set it up straight away. Then I won't have all the work and Pierre won't have to lug it around with me."

"For which I am very grateful," replies the Frenchman, steering the car through the streets of Monaco. "I don't even know how we're going to transport this mirror without breaking it. It was already barely possible to get it into the car."

"That sounds like a you-problem," grins Kika, looking at her boyfriend through the rear-view mirror. "You're the strong men. You'll find a solution while we get all the little things into the apartment. Right?"

The question is directed at you, but apart from a nod, she can't expect anything else in response. Charles's fingers are once again wrapped around your calf, his thumb gently stroking your warm skin and you can't think of anything else but the feeling of warmth that spreads through you from this small touch.

It takes a good hour for both the mirror and the rest to get to the upstairs in your apartment. After Pierre involuntarily teaches you several swear words in French and Kika decorates your entire windowsill with fake plants, they quickly make a run for it, worried that you're both going to take even more advantage of them than you already have.

"We've had a good day so far," you call out to Charles from the kitchen as you pour you both a glass of water each. You don't know where he is, but he will probably have heard you anyway.

"Definitely," comes his voice from the living room. As you follow it, you see Charles sitting on the large couch, his head back and his eyes closed. Only now do you notice how thick his neck is. Is it from all the training for Formula 1?

"Here." You hold his glass of water out to him and he opens his eyes to accept it. As you sit down, he takes a sip. You watch his Adam's apple bounce as he swallows.

"Thank you," he replies quietly and rests his arm on the back of the couch. A sign for you to lean against him, which you definitely don't refuse.

As you snuggle into his side and breathe in his unmistakable scent, you feel tiredness overtake you. "But it was exhausting."

""Mh-mhh."

"Thanks again. For my early Christmas present. Even though it wasn't necessary," you joke, but as rigid as Charles is sitting next to you, he doesn't seem to be in the mood for jokes. And as you follow his stare, the roses on the white piano come into your field of vision. The reason why you suggested the trip to the furniture store. And suddenly your tiredness is blown away.

"Do you happen to know anyone who has something like a fire bowl or something?" you ask your flatmate.

This question seems to break him out of his spell. His gaze wanders from the roses to you and he raises an eyebrow in confusion. "A fire bowl?" You nod. "Joris has a rooftop terrace and we've had bonfires there before in the summer." He licks his teeth once. "What do you need a fire bowl for? You're not thinking about sitting around a fire with sticks and marshmallows in winter, are you?"

"Not exactly," you reply and get up from the couch. As you look down at him, you hold out your hand. "Come on, mon joli. I have an idea."

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dragon-kazansky · 6 months ago

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Heart of the Dreaming

Morpheus x Female Reader

Soulmate AU

You are the daughter of Rodrick Burgess. You find out about the "demon" in the basement and decide you want to see it. Things take an unexpected turn when your soulmate connection is made with the man you find down there. You are the one he has been waiting for, and you're being taken away from. Not for long. Dream will protect his soulmate.

{Masterlist}

{Previous Chapter} - {Next Chapter}

Chapter Four - Pocket full of sand

☆☆☆

You had been locked away in that house for so long that you had no idea just how much the world had changed. You had never really been to London before, but you were sure even then it had been much different to the London you are in today.

You turn around to see Dream composing himself. He looked a little... tired, dare you say. He looks at you silently.

"You alright?" You ask.

He nods and then turns around. It's dark out, not many people around. He would know Constantine when he saw her. She had his sand.

You stand a good few steps away from him, holding yourself. You didn't bring a coat. You didn't exactly have time to bring anything. You were in a city you couldn't navigate, and your only companion was a strange man who had told you you were his soulmate.

It was a lot to take in one night.

"Constantine."

You turn around to see Dream looking at a woman in a long coat. She doesn't exactly hang about. The conversation is short as she directs his attention to a raven that has landed on the bench behind you. You find yourself confused at its sudden appearance. It seemed to be watching Dream.

"I do not need a raven."

You look at Dream, confused. The man was talking to a bird. Of all the crazy things you've seen so far in regards to this man, this was the craziest.

"Lucienne said you'd say that," the raven spoke.

You stare at the bird with wide eyes. "It's talking?"

"Uh, I'm Matthew," the raven replies.

"It's talking!"

Dream stands beside you and looks down at the raven. He doesn't act like he heard what you were saying. His attention was fully on the bird. "I do not need a raven," he repeats.

"Respectively, sir, you do." Matthew caws.

"Go back to the Dreaming."

"Look, she's got away!" Matthew exclaims, looking behind Dream.

Morpheus turns and finds Constantine has completely vanished from sight. She's made sure to put distance between them.

Dream turns to you. "Fine. You stay here with him. Don't move."

"What?" You look at him with slight panic. He can see it in your eyes.

"Just wait for me."

Dream walks off, and you scoff in disbelief. This man, who is supposedly your soulmate, has the audacity to "rescue" you from your family home and then abandon you in an unfamiliar city? The universe could have chosen someone with more dignity at least to tie you with.

You sit on the bench with a huff. Matthew cocks his head to the side, looking at you intently. You turn and glare at him, causing him to take a few steps away from you along the back of the bench.

"So, uh..." He snaps his beak gently, making a clicking sound, "who are you?"

"No one important," you sigh.

"That can't be true. Wait, are you the woman Lucienne mentioned? She said he had gone off to rescue someone."

"Does everyone know about this?" You ask.

"No? Not that I know of."

"I'm sorry, but how are you talking? You're a bird!" You look at him.

"I don't know. I just... am. I wasn't always a bird, mind you. I was like you once."

"Like me?"

"A human." He cocks his head again.

"Oh... What happened?"

"I, uh... I died."

"Oh... I'm sorry." You frown.

"It's fine. This is my life now." He ruffles his feathers a little. "So, uh... Are you just gonna sit here?"

☆☆☆!!!!!!!

Morpheus finds Constantine within her nightmare. He'd standing there when she woke. She states at him for a good few moments and then speaks. "For fuck's sake." She sighs. "How did you find me?"

"You were dreaming. But it wasn't only a dream, was it? It's a memory. No wonder you do not sleep."

"Maybe I don't deserve to."

"Perhaps not." He says to Constantine. "But I could make it go away."

"Only if I help you find your sand."

"Though finding anything in this place may require more magic than even you can muster."

Joanna falls silent for a moment and then gets up. "I'll look in the office. Try not to clean up while I'm gone."

"I'm coming with you," he says. "You have a gift for disappearing."

"All right. But if the mess in here offends you, wait till you see my office."

The office was so much worse.

Constantine started going through her things, hoping the pouch would pop up somewhere and she could get this over with. She didn't particularly want him hanging around.

"Why do humans love objects so much?" Dream asks.

"They do come in handy sometimes." Constantine tells him. "You seem pretty attached to your sand."

"It's not just an object. It's a part of me."

"If that's true, how'd you happen to lose it?" She asks, looking at him.

"It was stolen by a magic user called Burgess."

"Wait, not Rodrick Burgess? The old demon king himself, eh? Everyone used to say he was a fake. Said he had the Devil locked up in his basement. How the fuck did you..."

She looks up.

"Shit." She walks over to him. "Were you down there? All this time?"

His lack of response was in itself an answer.

Morpheus plucks a set of photos from a box and looks down at them. They picture Constantine and another woman in them.

"Is this you?" He asks.

"Why? Do I look that different?"

"No. Happy."

A moment of silence passes.

"Shit." Constantine whispers. "I know where your sand is."

☆☆☆

Dream had gone all the way to Rachel's apartment. He had first gone to Constantine's, assuming she had the sand there, but it became rather complicated quickly.

Turns out the sand was at her exes. An ex she hadn't seen in quite some time. He was ready to go inside with her, but she told him to wait outside.

She needed to do this alone, apparently. However, he was reluctant to let her out of his sight. She had a tendency to disappear.

While he waited outside, he turned to see you walking around the corner.

"I told you to wait," he scolded. Though you wouldn't say you felt overly threatened by him.

"We got bored."

"We?"

In that moment, Matthew flew down and landed by your feet. Dream was far from pleased. "I told you to wait for me."

"If we're soulmates or whatever, shouldn't I help?" You ask, looking at him just as unimpressed.

"No."

You scoff softly. "You're hard work, you know that?"

Dream says nothing as he stares at you, hands in his pockets. It's Matthew who breaks the awkward atmosphere between you both. He really doesn't know what's going on, and there was very little time to ask about it.

"You know you can't trust her, right? You should really go in there."

Dream shifts his eyes away from you. Matthew had a point.

"Wait here."

This time he was wanting you both. You cross your arms and watch him go inside. You stand there for a moment before slumping down onto the ground.

"That bad, huh?"

"I've known him less than a day, kind of. Well, I've known of him a while. It's complicated. Soulmates or whatever. I don't care about some stupid divine bond." You sigh.

"So, it's legit? The soulmate thing, I mean."

You lower your wrist to his level and show him the scar. "I got this the day I first set eys on him. Sometimes, it burns. Though it hasn't for a bit. It's what binds me to him, I think."

"Hm. So, why do I sense so much anger toward him?" Matthew caws.

"He's insufferable. We have this weird bond, and he has the emotional capacity of a teaspoon. He rescued me less than an hour ago, and now we're off on some strange quest to get... sand?"

"Well, yeah. Lucienne told me about that. He's getting his tools back," Matthew says.

"His tools?"

"His sand, his helmet, and his ruby."

"I'm so lost."

"How do I put this? Lord Morpheus is the dream lord. He is king and creator of the Dreaming, his realm. His tools include a pouch of sand, a helmet, and a ruby. Without them, he doesn't have much of anything."

You listen to Matthew speak. "I see."

"It's important he gets them back."

"I've gathered that much. I just... I don't see why I have to be part of any of this. Fine, I'm not going to grow old and die, but do I have to stay with him?"

"I don't think he's going to just let you go," Matthew caws.

"Why not? He doesn't need me."

Matthew goes quiet.

Constantine leaves the apartment and walks off, looking not so perky anymore. Not long after, Dream comes out and follows the direction she went in slowly.

You rise from the ground and watch them. He hadn't even glanced your way. Matthew goes on ahead to join the two. You keep your distance, watching them talk.

Constantine says something to Matthew, and then she looks up at you. She stares at you for a while and then turns and walks away under her umbrella.

Dream looks at the pouch in his hand and then looks up at you. "You're still here."

"You told me to wait."

"You could have run," he says flatly.

You glance at Matthew, who looks up at you. What he said earlier flashes before your mind. Dream probably wouldn't really let you go. "Yeah, well... whatever."

Dream stares at you in heavy silence. You hate it. You hate the way he looks at you. You hate the way he doesn't say anything. You can't say you're all too fond of him either.

"Stop looking at me."

Dream turns his eyes back to the pouch. "Come here."

You sighed and walked over to him, standing where Constantine had been standing just moments before.

"So, where are we going next?" You ask.

"Hell."

"Hell? Like metaphorical Hell or... Hell Hell?" Matthew caws.

Dream stares at you silently, and you swallow nervously. "Hey, I didn't agree to... that!"

"My helm is in Hell."

"I don't care. Hell? That's crazy." You yell at him quietly.

He just stares. He slowly raises his pouch and opens his other hands. He gives you time enough to walk away, but you don't. You know what he's doing. He pours the sand into his waiting palm, and it flows around the three of you in a blanket.

There really was no going back now.

☆☆☆

@deniixlovezelda - @missdreamofendless - @kpopgirlbtssvt - @meganlpie - @thoughtsfromlayla - @ladyjbrekker

@mwaaaaaugh - @bluespecs14 - @intothesoul - @lady-violet - @navs-bhat - @krahk - @oldsoulmagic

@rubyrose2014 - @lorkai - @roxytheimmortal - @star-maker-rain-dancer - @intothesoul - @gemini-mama - @whotperlinda

@dreamingblueberries - @the-shadow-of-aurora - @novavida - @blackgirlmagicforever

@permanentlyexhaustedpigeon88 - @hopshusushi -

#heart of the Dreaming #morpheus x reader #dream x reader #the sandman #female reader #dragon writes

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jamiedc-they-them · 7 months ago

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Good People (Platonic)

Summary: While in the Wasteland, running on nothing but fumes and even less hope, you meet someone. Someone who might just be the one thing you need in a place like this: a friend.

Note: This is shorter than my usual stuff (both in terms of words, probably, and also just in terms of content - more so a scene than anything else; maybe a series of short scenes showing Lucy's arc if you guys want and how her friendship with Y/N develops?) Let me know in an ask!

You were a survivor. You had been since the moment you were born, but you weren't sure how much longer that was going to last.

Your day hadn't started off good, you see. You were running out of water and had passed out earlier due to some kind of infection - no idea what it was or who/what it was from, you had come across a lot of beings and things in your travels - and some guy had thought you were dead and even pissed on you just in case. Was not refreshing, or nice.

You had fought him off, tackling him to the floor and punching him quite a few times. You didn't kill him, however. You just left him be after that.

An odd fellow with a briefcase who promise you everything you could ever want passed you by. He gave you something that gave you a boost. You had no caps, so the only piece of fluid you had left on you - your water container - was given to him in exchange for this item.

So, now you were even more screwed then before.

The man even seemed to somewhat pity you, but he still left.

You find an abandoned bus. It's been picked, recently or otherwise doesn't really matter, picked clean is picked clean. Or, well, as clean as you can get within the apocalypse.

"Hello?" a voice says. You spin around, reaching for a weapon you don't have as you lost it in the scuffle before, and so instead duck down - hitting your head on one of the seats.

You hear the person outside cringe.

"Sorry," she says, earnestly to your shock, "that sounded like it hurt."

"...It did," you find yourself saying in reply, but still keep your head done.

"Sorry," she says, again, "it's ok," she assures you, "I won't hurt you. I promise."

You peak your head up. The first thing you notice, is how clean she looks. She gives you a bright smile.

"Hi," she says, enthusiastically.

You just blink at her.

"It's ok," she assures again, "my weapon is away. I just - I just wanna talk. I'm a bit lost out here give, you know, everything is mainly just sand."

You guess that's fair. So, against your better judgment, you make your way to the stairs at the bus, and sit down. The woman sits down, letting out a sigh, glad to be able to rest for a moment.

She stretches. You adjust your neck. You must've slept funny.

"I'm Lucy," she says, holding out a hand to you.

"Y/N," you say, shaking her hand. Feels weird, being this open with someone.

"Y/N," she says, "that's a nice name. I never knew someone called Y/N before."

You're about to ask her why, when you see what she's wearing.

You whistle, or as best you can with a dry throat, it's croaky but the idea comes through, "you one of them Vault Dwellers?"

"I am," she says, and you're unsure if it's a proud statement or not, "but, I do also recognise my privilege for being one."

You hum, "how you finding up here?"

"Hot," she says, "we have air conditioning in the vaults. So, it's weird not being able to just turn down the temperature."

You chuckle. She smiles.

"Thank you for not trying to kill me."

You gesture to yourself, "don't exactly have anything to do that with, you know? Besides, you're not a bad person. I've met some bad people, you ain't one of them."

"Thank you. I knew there were good people out here."

You shrug, "I don't think I'm exactly 'good', but I've known worse."

"Well, I'm glad I've run into you. You're alot nicer than the previous man I met."

"Yeah, there'll be people like that..." you pause, then ask the question on your mind, "what brings you top side, Lucy?"

"Oh," there's a hint of hope, mixed with sadness in her eyes while she answers, "I'm looking for my dad. Some horrible woman called Moldaver took him. She steals dads."

You may internally find that last part funny, but you find yourself saying 'I'm sorry' to her about her plight. She thanks you once again.

"You're not crazy like that other man."

She's blunt, you'll give her that.

"I can be," you don't quite know why you're insulted by it.

She cocks her head to the side, "I'm good at reading people," you aren’t sure on that one, but you don't say anything, "and you're not like that previous man."

"What'd he do?"

"Drank most of my water. You ever met anyone like that?"

"Guy pissed on me this morning. Another stole my canteen."

"Oh..." Lucy says. You nod, expecting this to be the end of your conversion, but then she reaches behind herself for something. Instinct makes you freeze, but she just gives you a reassuring smile once again, and holds something out to you.

Her own canteen.

You look at her, doubt, confusion, and thanks all in your eyes at once.

"Take it," she insists, shaking it a little to tell you that there is still water inside it, "I mean it."

"But, that other man --"

"He's greedy. You aren't. And, judging by your lips, rough voice, inability to whistle, and slight grovel to your voice, and the way you hold yourself," perceptive too, "you need this more than I do."

"You sure?" she nods. Hesitantly, looking from her to the canteen as you reach out - her leaning forward to help you with your lack of energy due to dehydration and all - you grab it. It's not harsh, you don't rip it out of her grasp. Your actions are slow, deliberate.

You open it, and lift it up to your mouth, letting a few water droplets hit it.

You close it and give it back to her. But she pushes it to you again. This goes on a few more times.

"I meant what I said," she says, "take it."

You look around at the desert, "next water well won't be for a while."

She shrugs, "there's a town nearby. There should be some there. But, either way, you need this a lot more than I do."

You drink the rest of it. And, you feel ok. Not great, but better.

You cough a bit. Both due to whatever illness you have, and just from the water and how fast you drank it.

"That's a bad cough," she notes, taking the canteen back.

"Ah, it's nothing," you say, waving her off. Had worse infections.

You stand up, and she holds her hands out in case you fall. You put a hand up, telling her you're ok.

"Well," you say, "thank you for that, and the talk. Good people are few and far between. Best of luck --"

"Hey, wait!" she calls out as you start to walk away, "wait, please. Maybe - maybe you can help me."

"I ain't exactly much help given the lack of weapons, strength, and my illness."

She frowns, "well, once we find my dad, we can go back to my vault, we have doctors there who can help you and give you a good meal!"

She's preppy, but soon that softens in her eyes, "please...I can stop people from...urinating on you."

You snort at her disgust of the language. She has a lot to learn. Social ettiquite may exist in some places in the wasteland, but not everywhere.

"Well, when you put it like that..." you say, before smiling. She beams at you.

"Okey Dokey!" she exclaims.

"Okey Dokey!" you find yourself saying in kind, not mocking for once - you and your mouth had gotten you into trouble before, it was nice to not have some agenda with it this time. To let your guard down.

"Have you ever been to Filly before?" she asks you as you walk side by side. Though, she slows up a bit as you try and both get your strength back and keep your remaining bit.

"Once or twice when passing through," you say.

"Alrighty then," she says, glad to not be going in completely blind, "'this is going to be the beginning of a beautiful friendship.'" she says to you, clearly quoting something, based on her voice. You look at her confused.

"I'll show you the film when we're back at the vault," she says, before you continue on your way.

It's good to meet someone who didn't want to kill you on sight or extort you or something.

It was nice to not be alone anymore.

Lucy feels the same way. She has a sort of guide now. A friend.

An actual friend from the outside.

She's glad.

And, little did she know how right she'd be. It would be a friendship that would stand the test of time and everything in between.

Lucy had just met her best friend.

You had met yours.

Even if you both didn't know just how dark and dangerous the road ahead would get...

Part 2

#fallout #lucy fallout #lucy maclean #Lucy Maclean imagine #lucy maclean fallout #lucy maclean x reader

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jetii · 2 months ago

Text

Event Horizon

Chapter Eight: Loyalty

Chapter WC: 11,915

Chapter Tags/Warnings: background character death, brief description of wounds/blood

A/N: This is a long one! I had to make up for all the Rex we were missing before. Please enjoy the angst (my fav) and my attempt at writing battle scenes (my agony).

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Felucia, 21 BBY

"This is disgusting," you mutter, wiping the sweat from your forehead. It's a fruitless endeavor, the humidity unbearable. You're soaked to the bone, the mud caking your boots, the insects swarming around your face. You slap away a large winged bug and grimace when your palm meets a slimy substance.

"It's not that bad," Rex replies, his helmet under his arm. His hair is damp, skin shining, but he doesn't seem bothered by the weather, and you can't help but be a bit jealous. "I've seen worse."

You glare at him and wipe your hand on your tunic, the ichor smearing across the fabric. You'd forgone your usual white robes, the outfit too impractical for a planet like this, and instead opted for a set of beige, lightweight clothing. It was simple, a pair of pants, a tunic, and a matching hooded cape draped overtop your chest plate, but it allowed for more freedom of movement despite the way the moisture in the air made the fabric cling to your skin.

"Says the man in the full-body armor," you retort, gesturing at him with a dirty hand. "How are you not dying right now?"

He shrugs, the smile on his face a touch smug. "Guess I'm just built different, sir."

You roll your eyes, but the corners of your mouth lift into a smile. Despite the heat and the bugs and the general unpleasantness of Felucia, you've found yourself enjoying the company of the Captain. Rex is a capable soldier, and he's easy to work with, but it's his sense of humor and dry wit that have made the mission bearable. You've found yourself relying on his calm, collected demeanor and his quick thinking. He's a natural leader, and his men respect him, which makes your job a lot easier.

You trudge forward together at the front of the line, careful not to step into any of the large pools of standing water. The ground is squishy, the mud oozing beneath your boots, and you resist the urge to gag.

You're walking beside a stream, the water slow moving and murky. A few large, bulbous plants hang over the banks, the pods swaying slightly in the breeze, and the air smells earthy and sweet, a combination of rotting vegetation and fresh flowers. It would have been beautiful, had it not been for the stench of decay and the constant buzzing of insects. And the knowledge that, at any moment, something could pop out of the bushes and try to kill you, or worse, eat you.

"So, this is where the Separatists want to make their stand, huh?" you say, your voice low, and your eyes scanning the horizon. "They picked a real shitty spot."

Rex snorts, and the sound is loud and surprising. The sudden urge to laugh threatens to bubble up, and you bite your cheek, fighting to remain serious. You might be a little delirious, the heat and the humidity making it difficult to think straight, but Rex's reaction is too much.

A burst of laughter escapes your lips, and you cover your mouth, your shoulders shaking. Rex looks at you, his brow furrowed, but his expression is amused.

"They picked a good defensive position, sir," he corrects, the words a half-hearted reprimand. It loses its impact, however, as his own lips twitch upwards. "It's a tactical choice. This terrain makes it difficult to advance."

"You're right, I know," you manage between giggles, and you hold up a hand in apology. Your laughter tapers off, and you take a deep breath, wiping the tears from your eyes. "Sorry, it's the heat, I think."

Rex shakes his head, and his eyes twinkle. "I get it, sir. This place is...something else."

The two of you continue along the stream, and the troops fan out, keeping a safe distance behind you. You sigh and run a hand through your hair, pushing the sweat-soaked strands away from your face. It's been several days since you landed on Felucia, and you've been fighting the Separatists nonstop. The jungles are filled with traps and wildlife, and the enemy is well-equipped for the terrain. You've managed to secure a few key locations, but the fight is far from over.

Anakin and Obi-Wan have led the bulk of the assault, while you and Ahsoka have been assigned the task of clearing out the smaller outposts. You'd spent the morning in the thick of the battle, using the Force to aid the clones as they took out enemy droids. Now, you're on your way back to the rendezvous point, and the heat of the jungle is starting to get to you.

You feel as if you've been dipped in a vat of swamp water, and you can't shake the feeling of stickiness, the sensation both disgusting and unpleasant. You'd give your left arm for a cold shower, or at the very least, a fresh set of clothes.

You turn, and Rex is staring at you, a frown tugging at his lips. You must look a sight, the sweat pouring down your face, the mud splattered on your boots and trousers. It's far from your best, and you can't help but wonder what Rex is thinking, whether he finds you unappealing or repulsive.

The thought causes your stomach to twist, and you glance down, avoiding his gaze.

"We're almost there," Rex says, noticing the look on your face. He puts his helmet back on, the click echoing in the silence. "Just a little further."

"Thank the Force," you groan, and you can't stop the pout that forms on your face. "I'm beginning to think we should just let them have this stupid planet."

Rex chuckles, the sound distorted by the modulator, and he gestures at the trail ahead. "Just keep moving, sir."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," you mumble as you wipe more sweat from your eyes. "I'm going, I'm going."

The two of you move forward, your pace slow and measured. You're tired, the heat and the humidity sapping your strength, and the fatigue is beginning to catch up with you. You stumble, and Rex grabs your arm, his grip firm but gentle.

"Steady, sir," he murmurs, and he waits for you to regain your balance before releasing you.

You mumble an apology, and you take a deep breath, trying to shake off the tiredness, the ache in your muscles. You're not used to this, the physical exertion of war. The fighting is one thing, but the constant marching and camping and traveling are another. The heat, the humidity, and the lack of sleep are all taking their toll.

You've been running on adrenaline, and it's finally catching up with you.

"You're not looking so good, General," Kix says from behind you, his voice laced with concern. "Are you feeling alright?"

You try to hold back your long-suffering sigh, the urge to roll your eyes strong, but you manage to refrain and turn to face him, the effort almost too much. Kix helmet darts from you, to Rex, and back again, the worry evident in his posture.

As the medic, Kix's place was with the Captain, staying close to his side and monitoring the men. It was a responsibility he took seriously, and his care for his brothers was admirable. It made you trust him and respect him, but you were also incredibly sick of his constant vigilance. He had a tendency to hover, and you were starting to feel smothered. He reminded you a bit of a certain ginger-haired Jedi, and it was hard not to let it rankle you.

"I'm fine, Kix," you insist, trying to keep your temper in check. You give him a weak smile, the expression meant to be reassuring, but you know it's probably coming off more as a grimace.

"You've been sweating an awful lot," he observes, and his tone is suspicious, the words a bit accusatory. "You could be dehydrated."

You sigh and pinch the bridge of your nose. "It's a jungle, Kix. Everyone's sweating."

"You don't look like everyone, sir," he counters. His medical scanner is out before you can stop him, and he runs it over your body, the whirring noise grating. "You look flushed, and your pulse is elevated."

"Will you quit it," you hiss, slapping his hand away. You take a step back, putting some distance between the two of you as if it'll make your sudden irritation dissipate.

Kix stiffens at the rebuke, and his hand lowers to his side, the scanner still gripped tightly.

"I'm just trying to do my job, sir," he protests. "And right now, that job involves making sure you're okay."

"It's the adrenaline," you snap, and the words come out harsher than intended. You wince immediately, the guilt settling in. You'd been struggling with your temper, the anger simmering just beneath the surface, and you were doing your best not to take it out on the people around you, but sometimes, you slipped. "We need to keep moving, or else we'll be left behind."

"Kix is right," Rex interjects as he steps forward, his tone firm. "You look like you could use a break, sir."

"Captain," you warn, and you level him with a glare. "I am fine."

He folds his arms over his chest, and even though his face is hidden behind his helmet, you can tell by the way his body is angled towards you that he's not backing down.

You grit your teeth, the stubbornness setting in, and you square your shoulders, mirroring his posture. The two of you stand there for a moment, locked in a silent stare down, neither of you willing to budge. The rest of the troops continue marching past you, their bodies rigid and their footsteps heavy. They avoid looking at you, gazes focused straight ahead as if they can sense the tension between the two of you.

Rex is the first to speak, his voice quiet and measured. "You've been pushing yourself pretty hard, sir."

"You haven't seen me push myself," you scoff. "I'm only getting started."

"I'm just saying, maybe it wouldn't hurt to slow down."

"I'm not going to slow down," you argue. You plant your feet, the movement resolute, and the determination settles into your bones. You weren't about to let some hot-shot captain, no matter how handsome, or nice, or charming, tell you what to do, or how to act, or how to handle your own mission.

Rex, on the other hand, seems completely unperturbed by your show of defiance. His stance is relaxed, his shoulders loose, and he seems entirely unconcerned. He simply continues to stand there, arms crossed, and his helmet tilted ever-so-slightly to the side. It's an infuriating gesture, and you have to fight the urge to throw something at him, or, better yet, to push him into the stream.

You glare at him, and the silence stretches on, the seconds ticking by. With every step the troopers marching on the path take, your resolve wavers. You can feel yourself start to wobble, the tiredness getting the best of you.

You can't deny that, maybe, perhaps, Rex has a point. You've been pushing yourself hard, the guilt and the shame fueling your desire to prove yourself, and it's starting to wear on you. Still, you can't seem to bring yourself to admit that he's right, and the thought of slowing down, of admitting defeat, is just too much.

So, instead, you just keep glaring.

Kix's voice, when he speaks, is cautious. "General, if I may..."

"What," you snap, not bothering to look away from Rex.

"You're clearly dehydrated, and you could be suffering from heat stroke. Maybe the Captain is right. Maybe we should—"

You turn your glare on Kix, and the words die in his throat, his helmet dipping, and he takes a step back. You open your mouth, ready to give him a piece of your mind, but your vision is struggling to catch up to the sharp movement of your head, black spots clouding your eyes, and the words don't come.

The ground shifts, and your balance falters. You sway on the spot, your knees buckling, and you pitch forward.

"Sir!"

Rex moves with surprising speed, and his hands reach out, catching you by the waist. You feel the mud squelch beneath your feet, and then his arms are wrapped around your torso, holding you up. You blink a few times, trying to clear the fuzziness from your vision, and you feel another pair of hands grab your arms, helping steady you.

"I'm alright," you mutter. You shake your head, and the world comes into focus. Rex is still holding you, and Kix is standing beside him, his expression concerned. You can't help but blush, the embarrassment creeping up your neck, and you swallow hard, willing your heart to slow.

"Sorry," you say, your voice hoarse, and you wince at the sound of it. "I think I need a minute."

"Take as much time as you need," Rex replies, his voice soft, and he lets go of your waist. Kix takes hold of your arm, and he helps guide you off the trail and into the thick underbrush. Once out of view of the marching army, you settle against a tree trunk, the bark rough against your back. You lean your head back, and you shut your eyes, willing the world to stop spinning.

"I hate this place," you mutter bitterly. Your back slides against the trunk, and you end up sitting on the ground, your legs stretched out in front of you, and the mossy leaves squishing beneath your weight. You're grateful for the shade and the small breeze that rustles the canopy.

Your eyes open as Rex kneels beside you, his helmet tucked under his arm, and his gaze scan the trees. He looks back at you, his brow furrowed. "It is pretty disgusting."

"Understatement of the year," Kix quips. He pulls a canteen from his belt and hands it to you. "Drink this, sir."

You take the canteen and gulp down the liquid. The cool water soothes your throat, and you feel your strength returning, the weakness receding.

You hand the canteen back to Kix and manage a smile. "Thanks, I needed that."

"How are you feeling?" Kix asks, his tone clinical. He pulls a scanner from his belt and begins waving it over your body.

"Better," you reply with a tired sigh. You glance around, the jungle a blur of green and brown, and the realization sets in. You're supposed to be in the middle of a mission, not sitting in the bushes, wallowing in your misery. You look at Rex, and he gives you a sympathetic smile.

"I'm sorry. We're wasting time," you say, and you start to push yourself up. "We should get moving."

Rex places a hand on your shoulder, pushing you back down. "Not a chance, sir. You're going to rest until you're feeling better, and then, we'll move out."

"You sure? What if—"

"General, please," he interrupts, and the use of the title, and the pleading tone of his voice, causes your resistance to crumble. "You need to rest. Don't worry, we'll keep an eye out."

Your mouth opens and closes, and you realize he's right. There's no use arguing, or trying to change his mind. Rex is just as stubborn as you, and if he's set on helping you, then there's no way you're going to talk him out of it.

Finally, you sigh and nod, closing your eyes. Your muscles are sore, and the heat is draining, and it's a relief to get off your feet. The sounds of the jungle fades away, and all you can hear is the sound of your own breathing. You can feel the Force all around you, the life that exists within the plants and animals. It's a living, breathing entity, and you let yourself get lost in its rhythm, the connection between you and the world a strong, steady flow.

Meditation has always been a useful tool, but it's been harder since Yaddle, the anger and the self-loathing making it difficult to quiet your thoughts. Today, though, surrounded by nature and the bright, pulsing life all around you, the meditation comes easier, and you lose yourself in the peace, the darkness fading.

Time slips away from you, and you're not sure how long you sit there, basking in the light of the Force. It's only when a hand touches your shoulder that you snap out of your trance, and you leap to your feet, drawing your saber in one fluid motion.

You press the button, the yellow blade hissing to life, and the world comes rushing back, the sounds and the smells and the sights assaulting you.

Rex jumps, and he steps back, holding up his hands. "Woah, easy there, General."

"Shit," you mutter, and you lower your saber. The adrenaline ebbs away, and you take a deep breath, the tension leaving your body. "I'm so sorry, Rex. I didn't mean—"

"It's alright," he says as his hands fall, his voice hoarse. "I shouldn't have snuck up on you like that."

"No, I should've known better," you protest, feeling embarrassed. You deactivate your lightsaber and tuck it back into your belt, and you take a step closer to him, checking to make sure you haven't injured him.

There's a spot on his shoulder, the blue material slightly scorched, and you realize that the tip of your blade had come a little too close for comfort. You reach out instinctively and run your thumb over his pauldron, the armor still warm from the proximity to your weapon.

"Are you okay?"

His helmet tilts down, the visor following the movement of your hand, and he clears his throat, his voice sounding a little strange. "Yeah, I'm good, sir. Nothing a bit of paint won't fix."

You glance up at his face, the helmet still tilted towards you, and he shifts, his posture stiff. It's hard to tell if he's upset, but his body language reads as uncomfortable. "You sure?"

"I, uh, I'm fine," he replies, and he clears his throat again. His hand comes up, and he runs it along the back of his neck. He seems nervous, and you're about to ask him what's wrong when you realize you're still touching him, your fingers still running along the edge of his pauldron.

You can feel the heat rising in your cheeks, and you snatch your hand back, clenching it into a fist at your side. "Right. Sorry. It was just, um, habit, I guess. Did you need something?"

Rex coughs, and he shakes his head. He's quick to respond, the words coming out rushed. "Uh, yes. Actually, I did. I was just coming to let you know that the rest of the men have gone ahead to the rendezvous point. They should be there any minute."

"Oh," you say, the realization dawning. The jungle is empty, and the only sounds are the rustling of leaves and the buzzing of insects. "Shit."

"You've been asleep for an hour, sir. We've been taking turns watching you."

Your mouth falls open, and the flush returns to your cheeks. "An hour? Seriously?"

"Yeah," Rex says, the amusement evident. "We weren't sure what else to do, so I let you rest. You seemed like you could use the sleep."

"I can't believe I fell asleep," you mutter, covering your face with your hands. "I'm sorry, Rex. I didn't mean to keep everyone waiting."

He shrugs, and his hand moves to your shoulder, squeezing it gently. "It's okay, sir. Don't worry about it."

You can feel his touch through your armor, the pressure sending a tingle down your spine. The solid weight of his palm is a welcome distraction, and you let yourself enjoy it, the feeling grounding.

"Are you feeling better?" he asks, his voice soft.

You nod, the answer coming without hesitation. "Much."

His hand lingers for a moment longer before he releases his grip. He drops his arm, and his helmet tilts, his gaze appraising. "Good. Come on, let's get you back to base."

"After you, Captain," you say, giving him a small bow. He chuckles, and the two of you walk side-by-side, his arm brushing against yours. The path ahead is worn down by the many boots and vehicles that have trod upon it, and it's surprisingly easy to find, the trees spaced far enough apart that it's possible to walk without tripping over roots and branches.

The humidity and the heat have subsided, and the temperature is pleasant, the sun low in the sky. You can hear birds, and frogs, and various other animals, the sounds loud and raucous, and the air smells sweet, the flowers filling the air with their fragrance. It's a nice change from the stench of decay that's permeated the day, and you find yourself enjoying the walk, the beauty of the jungle finally becoming apparent.

You glance at Rex, his head moving left and right as he scans the area. His shoulders are relaxed, his stride even, and he seems more at ease than he has been since you've arrived on the planet. The thought makes you smile, and you feel your own stress lightening.

"How's Ahsoka?" you ask, breaking the silence.

"She's doing well," Rex answers without turning. "A little hot, but she's handling it better than you."

"Togruta are built for this kind of climate," you say, a touch of defensiveness in your voice, and you're careful to avoid stepping on a large vine that's fallen across the path. "I can't help that my human body is weak and fragile."

"You're hardly fragile, sir," he teases, glancing over his shoulder. "I saw you punch a clanker on Geonosis."

You snort as the memory hits. "That was different. I was angry."

"And reckless," he adds. His tone is more amused than admonishing, and you know he's smirking at you from under his helmet.

"I thought I was brave," you counter, raising an eyebrow. "Isn't that what you said the other day?"

He chuckles, and he shakes his head, his gaze returning to the trail ahead. "I did."

You grin, a pleased feeling washing over you. From what you've gathered, Rex is a man who takes his duty and himself very seriously. You've seen him joke with the other clones, and there's a camaraderie between them that's obvious. But, there's a formality when he speaks to others, a sense of professionalism. It's clear that he respects the chain of command, and you can't help but feel flattered that he's comfortable enough around you to tease, and to speak more freely.

You're reminded of his words to you that day, when he refused to allow you to chase after Dooku in your misguided anger. He had seen the truth of the situation, and he had been willing to speak up. And you weren't sure how he'd managed to break through your stubbornness, but he had.

You're grateful for his honesty, and for his willingness to challenge you. It's refreshing, and it makes you like him all the more.

"What are you thinking about?" Rex asks, his gaze never leaving the jungle, and his hand rests on his blaster.

"Just thinking about Geonosis," you reply. "And how you told me off."

"I did not tell you off," he protests, his tone indignant. "I merely...advised against you acting rashly."

"You did," you retort with a laugh. "But, I'm glad you did. Otherwise, I might not be here right now. I never got a chance to thank you, and I want you to know how much it meant to me."

He shrugs, and his steps slow. "Any good soldier would've done the same."

"Still," you insist, shaking your head. "You saved my life. I owe you."

Rex stops, and he tugs his helmet off, the action so sudden, it startles you. He's staring at you, his expression intense, and his mouth is pressed into a firm line.

"You don't owe me anything," he replies, his brow furrowing. "That's not how this works."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, we're soldiers," he says, voice tight. "Our duty is to protect the Republic, and the citizens of the galaxy. We are sworn to serve, and that includes our Jedi. It's not about debts or favors or gratitude. It's about doing what's right and what needs to be done."

You fall silent, the weight of his words settling over you. It's a noble sentiment, and it's easy to see why he's risen so quickly through the ranks. You've always known that the clones were loyal, that they would die for the Jedi, for the Republic. But, it's the first time you've heard one of them explain it, and the intensity in his voice makes your heart clench.

It, for whatever reason, makes you feel uneasy. Not because you don't believe him, but because you're not sure if he understands. There's a difference between loyalty and blind obedience, and there's a part of you, deep down, that worries that maybe Rex doesn't know the difference. That maybe the Republic prefers it that way, that it's easier to have a slave than an ally.

You shake your head, dismissing the thought, the shame settling in. You're being paranoid, you know. Rex is a good man, and his loyalty is a gift. A gift that, perhaps, the Jedi have taken for granted.

"I'm sorry," you say, your voice quiet. "I didn't mean—"

"It's not your fault, sir," he says, cutting you off. "We were created for this. This is what we were made for."

The words are meant to be reassuring, but they have the opposite effect. Your stomach twists, and the unease grows, the guilt weighing heavy.

"Doesn't that bother you?" you ask, unable to stop the question from leaving your lips. "Being created for a single purpose?"

He looks at you, his head tilted slightly. His face is impassive, his expression blank, and it's impossible to read his thoughts. You hold his gaze, and you realize how little you really know about him, or the other clones. You've been so focused on yourself, on your own failures, that you've barely given any thought to the fact that there's an entire group of people fighting alongside you, fighting and dying, and all you've done is complain about the weather.

He shrugs, and his posture changes, his shoulders dropping slightly, and he runs a hand over his head. "Not really," he says, and he sighs. "It's all we know."

"But, it's not fair," you protest, shaking your head. "You're not just soldiers. You're people. You have thoughts and feelings and hopes and dreams. And, yet, the galaxy expects you to put them all aside, to lay down your lives, for a cause you had no choice in joining."

Rex is silent for a moment, and his steps slow. He seems surprised by your words, his brow furrowed, and the corners of his mouth turn downward.

You realize you've said too much, and the guilt returns. You shouldn't have opened your mouth. You should have just kept your thoughts to yourself.

You try your best to push down the part of you that wants to continue, to say more. To tell him that the Republic is corrupt, that the Jedi are blind, that the galaxy is full of suffering and pain. That the war is a waste, that it will lead to nothing but destruction, and that he deserves better. But, you swallow the words, the anger and the frustration building, and you keep them locked inside.

The truth is, you don't know Rex, not really. And you don't have the right to tell him any of those things. No matter how much you might want to. No matter how much you feel.

Rex's face, however, shows none of these emotions. He's silent, the only sounds the buzzing of insects, and the rustling of leaves, and just when you're beginning to think he's not going to respond, his shoulders rise and fall.

"Well, I for one am grateful," he says, his voice soft, and he keeps his eyes trained straight ahead.

"What?" you ask, not expecting his answer. "Why?

His gaze flicks towards you, and the corner of his mouth twitches. "Because it brought me here."

"Here?" you echo, raising an eyebrow. "Felucia?"

"Yeah," he says, chuckling, and the tension melts away. He gestures to the surrounding jungle. "I mean, not exactly here. But, the idea. It's just...if the War hadn't happened, I wouldn't be here. None of us would. We'd just be sitting on Kamino, waiting for the day we're decommissioned. Or, maybe, we'd already be dead. Or never have existed in the first place. It's hard to say."

The words are spoken casually, as if they're a matter of fact, and the realization sets in. He's right. If not for the war, the clones wouldn't exist. They'd be just a handful of embryos, a dream, a plan.

But, the war gave them life. And, for many, it gave them death. The thought sends a chill down your spine, and you look at him, the understanding hitting.

"I see," you say, the words coming out quietly. "I suppose I've never thought of it that way."

"It's the only way I can think about it."

Rex's gaze moves back to the path, and you fall silent, his words echoing in your head. He's right, of course. There's no point dwelling on what could have been. The war is here, and there's no going back.

You can't help but admire his attitude, and his ability to find the positive. It's not the first time he's impressed you, and you realize that perhaps, he's the most optimistic person you've ever met. You wonder, briefly, if all clones are like that, or if it's something unique to him.

The two of you walk in silence, the conversation having run its course, and you sneak glances at him as you continue on, the curiosity getting the best of you. There's something about him that's magnetic, and the longer you're around him, the harder it is to look away.

He's handsome, and strong, and kind, and everything you're not. The thought makes your heart sink, and you're reminded once again of your shortcomings, of the darkness inside of you.

You wish, for the briefest of moments, that you were worthy of him, that you deserved his loyalty and his respect.

But, you know you don't.

You shake your head, the movement slight, and the dark thoughts vanish. It's useless. Wishing won't change anything.

Instead, you focus on the task at hand, the mission, and you try to clear your mind. You're almost back to the base, and the thought fills you with relief.

It's another few minutes before the two of you emerge from the thick foliage, and the camp comes into view. It's a large clearing, surrounded by towering trees, and the ground is a combination of dirt and grass. Several tents are being set up, and the sun is beginning to dip below the horizon. It's a welcome sight, and the anticipation of food, and sleep, and a chance to get out of your armor, is a tantalizing prospect.

You're halfway across the clearing, your eyes focused on the makeshift mess hall, when the air shifts, and the hair on the back of your neck stands on end. You come to a stop, and you reach out to grab Rex's arm, the feeling of foreboding overwhelming.

"Sir?" he asks, his voice low, and his body is tense, coiled.

You're about to answer, but you're cut off by a blaster bolt hitting the ground at your feet, the impact sending up a spray of dirt and rock.

You react on instinct, drawing your lightsabers, the blades glowing brightly, and you spin around. You're able to block the second shot, and the third, the energy of the bolts sizzling against the saber, and you step forward, your body moving into a defensive stance.

Rex is beside you, his blasters drawn, and the two of you move together, circling around, scanning the jungle for the source of the attack.

"Stay behind me," you tell him, the order sharp, and your gaze flicks over to him.

"Sir, you should stay behind me," he counters, his tone just as firm. "This is my job."

"Captain, I'm not going to let—"

"There!" one of the troopers shouts, pointing his finger at a group of trees.

The air is split by the sound of gunfire, the shots ripping through the underbrush, and the blaster bolts tear into the vegetation. Several of the branches fall to the ground, and the trunks are peppered with smoking holes. You can see the glint of metal bodies, and the flash of red, and you grit your teeth, the anger rising.

Droids.

It's an ambush.

The droids are closing in, the outlines barely visible through the thick, green leaves, and they're firing with a single-minded determination. Rex signals for the men to fire, and the clones begin returning the shots, their guns flashing. Several droids fall, but more appear. The battle is on, and you move to the edge of the clearing, intent on taking the fight to the enemy.

Rex is close behind you, his presence a comforting weight, and the two of you rush towards the tree line. The droids are scattered, the blaster bolts raining down on the area, and you raise your blades, ready to meet the enemy head-on.

Your first strike is a slash, the blow slicing through a super battle droid's midsection, the halves falling apart.

Rex is at your side, and his shots hit the next two droids, the metal bodies sparking and sizzling.

You take the next one, a swing cutting the machine's arm clean off, and the appendage flies through the air. You leap into the fray, the blades blurring as you move, relying on your muscle memory to keep you going as you scan the jungle. The droids are everywhere, and the clearing is filling with their bodies.

It's chaos.

You're surrounded, and it's all you can do to keep the shots from hitting the men, your sabers swinging, the light reflecting off the armor and the trees. You throw a boulder, the Force propelling it forward, and the impact crushes a group of the machines.

They keep coming, and the clearing is a whirlwind of activity. You can't see Rex through the mass, and you grit your teeth, the frustration building. You've barely begun, and already, the droids are getting the upper hand.

It's a losing battle, and you can't help but wonder if, maybe, there's another way.

A droid aims a blaster at your chest, and you deflect the shot, sending the bolt ricocheting before leaping into the air. You land behind it, your lightsaber severing its head.

The head hits the ground, and you glance up, seeing Rex's outline through the haze, the smoke from the blasters clouding the area. He's moving in your direction, and you move to meet him, your sabers a blur, the heat of the bolts making your skin prickle.

His head whips to the side before he suddenly grabs your arm and pulls you, his body twisting. You're about to protest, but the words die on your lips as an explosion rocks the ground where you were standing. Your ears are ringing, and you struggle to stay upright, the shockwave rippling through the clearing.

Rex looms over you, his blasters raised and his body shielding yours. You can't hear anything, but you can tell by the way his helmet is moving that he's speaking to you.

Your head is pounding, and your vision swims. You look up, blinking, and your eyes finally focus on the scene before you. The spot where you'd been standing is nothing but a smoking crater, the dirt and rocks scattered. The trees, too, have been shattered, their trunks broken, the leaves ripped apart.

You take a deep breath, and the sound comes rushing back. You can hear the shouts of the clones, the sound of blasters firing, and the explosions of grenades. It's all so loud, the noise deafening, and you want nothing more than to curl up in a ball and wait for it to be over.

Instead, you stagger to your feet, your body aching. Rex grabs onto your arm, helping steady you. He says something, his voice muffled, and you shake your head, trying to clear it.

"What?" you shout, trying to be heard over the cacophony.

He leans closer, his grip tightening. "Are you alright?"

"Yes, I'm fine," you lie, pushing yourself away from him, and you take another breath, the dizziness subsiding. You give him a weak smile. "That's two I owe you, Captain."

He shakes his head, and the helmet tilts, the motion conveying the exasperation. "You can repay me by not getting yourself blown up, sir."

You roll your eyes, but you can't help the smile that spreads across your face. "I'll do my best."

Another blast hits the ground a few feet away, and the two of you jump back, the dirt and rocks flying. The droids are still advancing, their numbers seemingly endless, and you realize that the clones are losing ground.

"We have to get out of here," Rex shouts, the panic obvious. "This is a losing battle."

You glance around, trying to see a way out. The clearing is a battlefield, the bodies of droids and clones littering the ground. It's a bloodbath, and the men are outnumbered. There's no hope of winning, and it's only a matter of time before they're overrun.

You can feel the weight of the decision pressing down on you. It's not the first time you've faced such a dilemma, but it never gets easier. The will to keep fighting, to give everything you have, to protect the people you love.

And yet, there's another part of you that knows when to retreat, when the cost is too great. It's a part of you that you're ashamed of, a part that you try to bury. But right now, with Rex at your side, and his brothers' lives in danger, it's hard to ignore.

You look at him, and his gaze meets yours. You find yourself wishing you could see his eyes, and the expression on his face. To know what he's thinking, and what he's feeling.

He seems to sense the question, and he gives a slight nod, the gesture conveying the understanding. He's with you, and whatever choice you make, he'll support you.

The knowledge helps. And it strengthens your resolve.

"Alright," you say, grimacing, and your hand lifts as you activate your comm. The static crackles in your ear, a deafening roar, and you're not sure if anyone will hear. "Anakin, can you hear me?"

The line is silent, and for a moment, you fear the worst. Then, a voice, garbled and distorted, cuts through the noise.

"Goldie, what the hell is going on?"

Relief floods you, and you press the button, the sound of the battle still raging around you. You press your back against the tree, using it as cover, and Rex does the same a few feet away.

"We have to retreat," you shout, your words almost drowned out by a barrage of blaster bolts. "There are too many droids."

Anakin is quiet for a moment, and the sounds of the battlefield echo through the comm. You hear his saber slice through something, and he yells a command, the order almost indistinguishable.

"We can't," he says, his breathing labored. "We have to stand our ground."

You watch Rex, and the helmet turns, his body still tense. He's focused on the fight, but you can feel his anger, and his frustration, and his desire to protect his brothers. It's palpable, and the emotions feed yours, twisting, and pulling, and growing.

You swallow, the lump in your throat making it difficult to speak. "Anakin, we're getting slaughtered out here. We have to pull back, regroup, and try again later."

"Not an option, Goldie. We can't afford to lose this base," he counters, his tone firm. "If we lose the base, we could lose the planet."

Rex ducks from cover, firing, and a droid falls, its limbs jerking as the sparks fly. He's back in position in seconds, his helmet turning, searching for another target.

The droids are advancing, and they're beginning to surround you, their metal bodies crowding the tree line. The clones are starting to fall back, and the gap between the two forces is narrowing.

It's getting dangerous, and it's only a matter of time before the battle will be completely lost.

"Anakin, listen to me," you say, your voice low. "We have to leave. If we stay here, we're going to lose more than the base. We're going to lose the entire battalion."

The words seem to echo in the air, and the tension in the clearing is so thick, you can feel it. You take a deep breath and reach out, trying to center yourself. The Force around you is in chaos, but you can feel Rex, his presence steady and strong. You cling to it, to him, and it's the only thing that keeps you from spiraling into panic.

Anakin doesn't respond right away, and the silence drags on. More and more clones are falling back, passing you and heading towards the safety of the jungle. You see Kix dragging an injured trooper, the man's leg a bloody mess, and you wince.

You wait for Anakin's response, knowing the decision is his. You've given your advice, and you trust him to make the right choice. You always have, and you always will.

But, right now, in the heat of the battle, it's hard to have faith.

"Fine," he huffs at last, and his voice sounds strained. "Pull back, but we're coming back with a plan to take this damn base."

You breathe a sigh of relief, the weight of the decision lifted from your shoulders. "Copy that. We'll rendezvous at the secondary camp."

You end the transmission, and Rex glances at you, his helmet tilted.

"The general is calling a retreat," you explain, and his shoulders relax slightly. "We need to get to the secondary camp, and then, we can regroup."

"Yes, sir," he says with a nod. He raises his hand, signaling to the clones, and his voice echoes in the clearing, the sound carrying over the chaos. "Fall back! Fall back!"

You watch the troops obey, the men retreating into the jungle, their bodies disappearing into the foliage. It'll be miles before you reach Obi-Wan's camp, and the walk will be a long one.

You look at Rex, and the two of you share a brief moment of eye contact before he's moving, and the two of you fall into step beside each other, running alongside the others. The droids follow, the battle raging, and the forest is filled with the sounds of gunfire, and screams, and the hum of the blasters.

The sun has set, and the air is cooler, the night sky a dark purple barely visible through the canopy. You keep running, the exhaustion beginning to set in, and the ache in your muscles making each step a struggle. The path ahead is littered with obstacles, the fallen trees and rocks, and the thick underbrush making the going difficult. You can hear the footsteps of the clones, the rattling of their armor, and you try not to think about how many might be injured, or worse.

You try not to think about what might have happened if you'd stayed, or how many more would have died if you hadn't made the decision to retreat.

The guilt is a constant, weighing heavier on you with every step. The battle had been a loss, but you couldn't shake the feeling that the retreat had been a mistake. That you should have pushed harder, or come up with another plan. It's a feeling you've had before, and it never gets easier.

The pain in your head grows the longer you run, the headache becoming a dull throb, and the pressure builds, the darkness threatening to take over. It's a familiar sensation, and you try to block it out, focusing on the path ahead and on keeping up with the pace.

The minutes drag on, and the air becomes more humid, the scent of rain filling your nose. The droids are still pursuing, and you can see the flashes of their lights as they move through the trees. But, they’re getting farther and farther away, the gap between the two sides widening.

The wave of relief is tempered with the exhaustion that finally catches up with you, and you have to slow down, your breathing heavy. You stumble, and Rex reaches out, his arm steadying you.

"Sir, are you sure you're okay?" he asks, his voice low with concern, and the helmet tilts as he studies you. "You took a pretty bad hit."

"You don't have to babysit me, Rex," you retort. The words coming out more sharply than intended, and Rex immediately drops his hold on your arm.

"I'm not babysitting you, sir," he says stiffly. "I'm just concerned. It's my duty to make sure you're safe."

You roll your eyes, the frustration rising, and the anger bubbles to the surface. It's been a long day, and the last thing you want is to be coddled. Especially not by Rex, especially not when all he's doing is making you feel like a failure and a liability.

"I'm fine," you insist, a bit harsher than necessary, and you start moving again, intent on leaving him behind, the urge to put distance between the two of you growing. "I can take care of myself."

He falls into step beside you, his steps quickening to match yours.

"I'm well aware, sir," he says. The exasperation in his voice is clear even through the modulation of his helmet, and you can't help but wince. You're being unfair, and you know it. But, you can't stop the feelings from building. "But, I would appreciate it if you would allow me to do my job. And, my job is to protect you."

"And, my job is to protect you," you bite out through clenched teeth. "All of you."

You shake your head, and the guilt settles in, the regret mixing with the anger, and the resentment, and the self-loathing. It's a potent combination, and it makes your stomach twist, the nausea growing.

Rex doesn’t respond, the two of you walking side by side in tense silence. It's unbearable, and you know it's your fault. You're the one who started it, after all. You're the one who keeps picking fights and pushing people away.

But, you can't help it. You're not built for this. For the war, and the battles, and the responsibility. You were never supposed to be here, and the more time you spend on the front lines, the more you realize how unprepared you are, how out of place.

It's a harsh reality, and it makes the anger burn brighter.

It's not fair, and it's not right, and it's not what you want.

And, yet, here you are, leading a battalion and fighting a war. And, no matter how hard you try, you can't seem to get it right. You can't seem to keep them safe, or stop the fighting, or end the war. You can't seem to make a difference, no matter how hard you try.

You can't seem to do anything.

"With all due respect, sir," Rex starts, breaking the silence. His voice is soft, and he sounds almost...defeated. "It's not the same."

You stop, your gaze shifting towards him, and he slows, coming to a halt beside you. The clones keep moving, and the group is beginning to stretch out, the men spreading out along the trail.

You look at him, and he meets your gaze, his posture tense.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, there's a difference," he says, voice deliberate and measured. "We were made for this, to fight and die. You weren't. And, we don't expect you to. We know you're doing your best."

The words hit harder than expected, and the breath leaves your lungs, the realization sinking in. It's not the first time you've heard it, and the clones have said it often. But, somehow, coming from him, it seems to carry more weight. You don’t like it. Not the words, not the sentiment, and not the way it makes you feel.

You shake your head. "I'm a Jedi," you argue. "This is my job, just as much as it is yours."

"No, sir," he counters, his tone firm, and the certainty is unmistakable. "Your job is to lead, to guide us, and to protect the Republic. Our job is to fight, and die, if necessary. We're expendable, you're not."

The words sting, and you can't help the flinch, the emotions threatening to overwhelm. It's too much, and the tears sting your eyes. You take a deep breath, trying to swallow the feelings down.

"That's not true," you say, shaking your head. "You're not expendable. You're valuable, and important, and you deserve to be protected."

Rex sighs, the sound crackling through his modulator, and for a moment, he just stares, the gaze impossible to read. He's silent, and the only sounds are the footsteps of the clones, the rustling of the leaves, the distant sounds of the battle, the echoes of explosions reaching your ears.

He reaches up and slowly pulls off his helmet, and his eyes lock with yours. The moonlight shines off his face, highlighting his cheekbones, and the curve of his jaw. He looks tired, the bags under his eyes more prominent, and the worry is etched into his features underneath the dirt and the sweat.

It hurts to look at him. To see the concern, and the understanding, and the care in his expression. It makes the guilt and the shame that much worse.

"I know you believe that, sir," he says, and his voice is quiet and gentle. "But, the truth is, we're soldiers. This is what we were bred for. What we were created for. And, if we die, we'll have fulfilled our purpose. We'll have served the Republic, and the Jedi. That's enough."

The words are said with a finality, and you understand without a doubt that he believes them, every single one. That, in some strange way, he's happy with the path he's on.

You shake your head, unable to wrap your mind around it. Unable to accept it. "Rex—"

"General," he says, cutting you off. He moves closer, his hands clenching around the helmet in his grip. "Listen, the last thing I want is to make this about me. But, I need you to understand, this is how we see it. How we feel. And, I don't think you can lead us if you don't recognize that."

His gaze is intense, and his eyes search yours, looking for something. What, you're not sure. But, it's clear that he's not going to back down, and that he's not going to change his mind.

You swallow as the realization sets in. The truth is, you do know in a way, perhaps more than either of you realize. You've known since the moment the Jedi found you, since the moment you were brought into their fold. That, to the galaxy, and the Force, and the universe, you were always a tool, a means to an end. That your life was not your own, not really.

And, that, one day, you would die, and it would all be for nothing.

"Why?" you ask, the question slipping out before you can stop it.

"Because, it's the truth," he says, and the response is so honest, and so open, it makes your chest ache.

"No, I mean, why are you so okay with it?" you ask, shaking your head. "Why aren't you angry, or frustrated? Why aren't you fighting it?"

His lips press together, the frown pulling at the corner, and he looks away, his eyes focused on the path ahead. He runs a hand over his head and down the back of neck, the action seemingly unconscious.

He's silent for a long moment, and you wait, the anticipation growing inside you.

Finally, he sighs, his shoulders sagging, and he glances at you.

"Because, I was made for this," he says, his voice soft. "This is what I was created for. And, I know I'll never be able to do more than this."

His words are like a punch to the gut, and you can't hide the hurt in your eyes. The look on your face seems to make him realize the impact of his words, and Rex quickly averts his gaze, his expression contrite.

He turns, and the two of you continue walking, the silence settling over the two of you, the awkwardness growing.

You're not sure why his words bother you so much, but they do. You've always known that the clones were designed for war, that their sole purpose was to serve the Republic. But you've been bothered by it since the day they arrived, beacons of hope and fear and everything in between. Since the first time you saw Rex, a sense of dread washed over you, and a pit formed in your stomach. It's a feeling that's only gotten worse as time went on, and every day brings new horrors.

The more time you spend with them, the more human they seem. And the thought of their lives being taken for something so meaningless makes you want to scream.

You've never been able to understand how the Council could condone the use of the clones, or how the Jedi could turn a blind eye. It goes against everything you were taught, everything you believe. And, it's a constant reminder of the corruption and hypocrisy of the Order.

The thought makes the anger rise, the resentment bubbling to the surface.

"It's not right," you mutter, and the words are more to yourself than to him. "It's not fair."

Rex looks at you, his gaze meeting yours. His eyes are dark, and they're filled with something. Something you can't quite name, something that makes your chest tighten and your heart beat faster. He doesn't ask, and he doesn't have to. He knows.

"That's just the way it is, sir," he says, his voice steady. "This is our place, and we have to make the best of it."

The words are heavy, and they land with a finality that resonates. He's accepted his role, and he's willing to do whatever it takes to fulfill it. No matter the cost, no matter the pain.

You wish you could be that selfless, that determined. You wish you could be like him, and Anakin, and Obi-Wan. They all have a strength that you'll never understand, a sense of duty and honor and courage that you can only dream of.

You wish you could have a fraction of their conviction, their dedication. But, you're not like them. You've never been like them. And, you doubt you'll ever be.

You're not sure what to say, so you don't say anything. Rex secures his helmet back on and moves ahead of you, taking point, his pace brisk, the armor glinting in the moonlight. You're left alone, and you're grateful for the reprieve.

You're not sure how to deal with your feelings, with your frustration. You feel helpless, and there's a part of you that wants to grab Rex by the shoulders and shake him until he sees the truth, until he understands.

But, you know that won't work. You know that, in the end, the only person who can change his mind is him. And, even then, you're not sure it would make a difference.

You walk, and the night passes slowly, the exhaustion seeping into your bones. Your body aches, and your head is pounding, the pain making each step a struggle. The battle, and the argument, and the journey have drained you, and the emotional toll is just as bad.

You try to reach out through the Force, to draw on its power, and it comes slowly, the energy flowing through you, and around you. But the presence of so much death and destruction is disorienting, and the pressure builds, the headache becoming a steady, throbbing pain. You need to find Obi-Wan, and soon. Otherwise, you're afraid you might snap.

You can't help but wonder if that's what the Council intended, when they assigned you to the front lines. To push you until you break, and then, send you back to the Temple, a lesson learned. Or, maybe, they don't care at all. They've washed their hands of you, and now, they're content to watch you fail.

The thought sends a chill down your spine, and the anger simmers, the resentment building. You're not sure what the truth is, but the possibilities are terrifying.

The base camp is quiet when you arrive, the men hunkered down and waiting for the next wave of attacks. You can feel their fear, their anxiety, and it makes your chest ache. There's nothing worse than the waiting, the not knowing. It's a different kind of battle, one that's just as dangerous, and just as painful.

You make your way to the command tent, the flap open and the light spilling out onto the ground. Ahsoka and Anakin are already there, looking over a holo-map, and their heads snap up as you enter, their gazes locking onto yours.

The tension in the air is palpable, and their faces are drawn, the exhaustion written on their features. They've both been through a lot today, and you can feel the weight of it pressing down on them.

You give them a small smile, and Anakin nods, his posture relaxing, if only slightly. His eyes shift behind you, and the concern returns, the worry etched into his face. You turn, following his gaze, and your eyes lock with Rex's.

He's standing in the entrance, his helmet in his hand, and his eyes are narrowed. The worry, and the anger, are clear, and it's obvious to you that he's still upset.

You turn back, the guilt too much to deal with, and you try to rub the tiredness from your eyes. As you move to stand beside Anakin, you can't help but notice the way Ahsoka's eyes flick from you, to Rex, and back again.

She frowns, and she glances at her master, the silent question in her eyes. He doesn't respond, his focus on the map, and she sighs.

"Are you alright?" she asks you, her voice low.

"Yeah, I'm fine," you reply, and you try to give her a reassuring smile, but you're not sure it's very convincing. "Just a little tired, that's all."

"It's been a long day," she agrees, and her eyes linger on the bruise on your face, the blood dried and flaking. "You should get that checked out."

You shake your head. "I'll be fine. It's just a bruise."

She gives you a look, her eyebrows raising, and she opens her mouth to protest, but Rex beats her to it, his voice cutting her off.

"I agree, sir," he says, moving closer. The armored plates of his thighs hit the edge of the holotable, his movements stiff, and you wince at the sound. "You should get it checked out."

The three of you look at him in surprise. He's been quiet since you arrived, but now, he's standing firm, his eyes narrowed, his jaw clenched. He's not backing down, and the frustration is radiating from him, his anger almost tangible.

Anakin's eyebrows raise, and his lips twitch in amusement. "I see Rex has been acquainted with your infamous stubbornness, Goldie."

You roll your eyes. "I'm not that stubborn."

Rex makes a noise that sounds suspiciously like a scoff, and you shoot him a glare.

"I'm not," you insist, crossing your arms. "Besides, there are more important things to worry about. We need to discuss our next move."

"Agreed," Obi-Wan's voice echoes from the tent opening. He enters with Cody close behind, his face drawn. "We have to come up with a plan, and fast. We're losing ground, and we can't afford to lose this planet."

His eyes drift over you, his gaze lingering on the bruise, and he frowns. "I see you've gotten yourself injured again."

The accusation is clear, and the anger flares, hot and bright. You bite back a retort, not wanting to start another argument, and you take a deep breath, trying to calm yourself. Obi-Wan must feel it, because he sighs, and the annoyance leaves his face, his eyes softening with understanding.

"Come here, my dear," he says, gesturing as he steps up to you. "Let me take a look at it."

You hesitate, the embarrassment making the blush spread across your face. But, after a moment, you move forward, and his fingers lightly trace the bruise. You can't help but wince as he presses on the swollen skin, and his brow furrows.

"It's not serious," Obi-Wan says, his tone thoughtful. "But, you should be careful. Head wounds can be tricky."

"Thank you, Master," you say, the sarcasm evident, and he smirks. His hand lingers for a moment longer, and then, he drops it, stepping away.

"Now," he continues, moving towards the table. "We need to come up with a strategy, and quickly. There's no telling when the Separatists will make their next move, and we can't afford to be caught off guard."

You nod as you take your place, and the others follow suit, gathering around the holo-map. Through the blue projection of the battlefield, you can see the battle is still raging, the droids advancing, and the clones' position shrinking.

Your gaze shifts, and your eyes lock with Rex's, startled to find him already watching. His lips are pressed together, his jaw clenched, and his eyes are intense, the brown irises darker than usual. He looks away, his gaze turning back to the holo-map, and the feeling in your stomach grows.

You turn your attention back to the meeting, trying to focus, but it's difficult, your mind elsewhere.

You don't want to think about the fact that Rex cares, that his concern, and his anger, and his frustration are directed towards you. You don't want to think about what that means, or how it makes you feel. You can't, not when you're trying to keep everyone alive, not when you're trying to figure out a way to win the war.

You take a deep breath, steeling yourself, and you look at the holo-map, determined to focus.

"How long before we can get reinforcements?" Anakin asks Obi-Wan. "We can't hold this position without help."

"The Council is sending additional troops, but it will take time," Obi-Wan says, a note of defeat in his voice. "We'll have to manage the situation ourselves, at least for the time being."

"So, what do we do?" Ahsoka asks as she looks around the table.

Obi-Wan shakes his head, his expression grim. "We fight. Hopefully, we can hold the line until reinforcements arrive."

"And if we can't?"

Your question hangs in the air, the unspoken truth hanging heavy between the six of you. If the Republic doesn't send help, or if the battle goes badly, there will be nothing stopping the Separatists from taking the planet.

It's not something any of you want, but the reality is harsh, and it's a possibility none of you can afford to ignore.

"Let's just focus on getting through the next few hours," Anakin says, his voice firm. "We can deal with the rest later."

The determination in his eyes, the unwavering resolve, is a familiar look, and one that you've seen many times. It's the same look he's had every time you've needed him, the same look he's had since he was just a youngling, always ready to help, to protect, to fight.

He's never backed down from a challenge, and he's not about to start now.

You take a deep breath, drawing on his strength, and you feel a small bit of relief.

"Alright," you say, nodding. "Let's get to work."

You spend the next few hours poring over the maps, planning your defenses, and trying to come up with a strategy. The reality is, there's only so much you can do, and the odds are not in your favor. But, you have to try, and you have to hope, and you have to have faith that the Republic will send help, and that the reinforcements will arrive before the Separatists destroy everything.

Finally, the meeting is over, and the six of you head back out into the camp. It's dark and quiet, and the air is heavy with smoke. The men are huddled around small fires, their faces illuminated by the flickering flames, and they're exhausted, their postures slumped, their expressions grim. There's a somberness in the air, and the knowledge that the battle is far from over.

You walk through the camp, offering encouraging words where you can, and trying to reassure the men, even as the doubt and fear continue to grow. You stop and check on the injured, offering what comfort you can, and you take the time to speak to the medics, ensuring they have what they need.

It's not much, but it's all you can do, and you're grateful for the opportunity to connect with the clones, even for a moment. On your way out, Kix presses a bacta patch into your hands, his eyes narrow in disapproval.

"You need to take care of yourself, sir," he says, voice firm. "No one else is going to do it."

You roll your eyes, a smile tugging at your lips. "I will. Promise."

He's not satisfied, but he doesn't argue, and you continue on, your feet carrying you through the camp. You wander, the exhaustion making your movements slow, and the ache in your muscles growing.

Your steps eventually bring you to the edge of the jungle, and you stand, your eyes sweeping over the landscape, the view breathtaking. The moonlight reflects off the trees, the canopy lit up, the colors vibrant. The scent of the forest fills the air, the smell of earth and life and nature mixing with the smoke, the acrid stench of death.

You can't get Rex's words out of your head, his voice echoing in your ears, the memory playing over and over again. You know he's right, and that the clones are different, and that their lives are more expendable than yours, but it doesn't make it any easier. It doesn't change the fact that, in the end, you're all fighting and dying for a Republic that doesn't care about any of you, a system that's broken, and corrupt, and flawed.

You let out a frustrated breath, the anger simmering, and you look up at the sky, the stars glittering. You don't get to see the stars on Coruscant, not with the light pollution, and it's a sight you'll never get used to.

"I can feel your anger," a voice says, and you glance to your left, surprised to find Ahsoka standing beside you. Her eyes are narrowed, and her arms are crossed over her chest. "You're upset."

"I'm sorry." You look away, turning back to the view, the guilt settling in. "I'm just frustrated. It's nothing."

She moves closer, and she's quiet for a moment, her eyes studying you. "About the battle?"

You sigh, shaking your head. "About the whole damn war."

She hums, her expression thoughtful.

"Me too," she admits, and her gaze shifts, her eyes finding the stars. "There's so much, and sometimes, it feels like there's no end in sight."

"It's like no matter what we do, it's not enough," you say, your voice quiet. "The fighting, the death, the sacrifices...it's not changing anything."

Ahsoka is silent, her gaze focused on the night sky, and you can feel her uncertainty, her emotions swirling. You bite the inside of your cheek to keep yourself from saying more, to keep from pouring out all your doubts and fears and frustrations. She's younger than you, and she's struggling, just as much as the rest of you, and the last thing she needs is you putting even more pressure on her.

But, before you can apologize, and try to distract her, she speaks.

"We must do the hard work of mastering our fear, so that in turn does not master us," Ahsoka says. She pauses, the words weighing heavily. "Master Yoda taught us that. I never understood, not until recently."

"Yeah," you say, and the sadness hits, the realization settling in. "Me too."

She turns, her eyes finding yours, and her expression is solemn. "We have to stay positive. We have to believe that there's a way out of this, that we'll find a solution. Otherwise, the anger, and the hate, and the despair...they'll consume us, and we'll never be able to come back from that."

The tears well, and you nod, your throat tight. For a moment, you don't trust yourself to speak, and the silence stretches between the two of you. Ahsoka seems to understand, and she turns back to the view, giving you the time you need to collect yourself.

You look up at the stars, the sky bright and the stars glinting, and, for a moment, you can almost believe.

"We will find a way," you say with a conviction you don't feel, and you give her a small smile. "We have to."

She nods, and her lips curve upward. "Yes, we will."

"Has anyone ever told you you're wise beyond your years?" you tease.

She rolls her eyes, and her smile grows, the amusement lighting up her face. "Not as much as they should."

You can't help the laugh, the sound bubbling out of you, and the tension leaves your body. She grins, her expression mischievous, and she nudges you playfully with her elbow.

"You know, if you ever want to talk, I'm here. We can...hang out, or whatever."

The invitation is unexpected, and the surprise must be written on your face, because she quickly adds, "I mean, if you want."

The happiness flooding your chest catches you off-guard, and it takes you a moment before you can find your words.

"I would like that," you say, and she returns the smile, her relief palpable. "How are you at Sabacc?"

She raises her eyebrows, interest sparking in her eyes. "Pretty good. Why?"

You grin. "I have a deck in my tent."

"Are you challenging me, Master?" she asks with a smirk.

"Only if you're brave enough, Padawan," you say, and her smile widens.

"Okay, bring it."

You laugh, and the two of you turn, heading towards the tents. As you walk, Ahsoka starts talking, the conversation flowing easily between the two of you, and you find yourself relaxing, the anxiety easing with every step. It's a rare occurrence, these moments of levity, and you're grateful for the chance to be happy, if only for a little while.

You'll need it, if you're going to survive what's to come.

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#the clone wars #captain rex #clone captain rex #captain rex x reader #rex x reader #obi wan x reader #roy writes #i hope you didn't think this romance was going to be easy

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babymetaldoll · 14 days ago

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Are you mine? - Chapter ten: "Hell and back"

Summary: The Reid family doesn't have time to deal with what just happened to Spencer, 'cause there is more trauma waiting for them and the rest of the team. Word count: 4.490 Warnings: Criminal Minds trauma happening. Morgan gets hurt. A/N: The hardest part about writing this whole book was the fact a bunch of bad things happened, to Spencer and the team. It really hurts to know it won't get easier soon... sorry.

Series' Masterlist - Author's masterlist

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(Y/N)'s point of view

Looking back at that moment, I think I enjoyed my second pregnancy way more than I did the first one. I wasn't freaking out most of the time, I felt more secure. Spencer was, as always, my prince charming. He helped with every craving, did all the chores I couldn't do, helped with Raven, and prepared a nursery in the spare room in our apartment.

- "We should start considering moving to a bigger place."- I commented as I walked into the room and found Spencer painting the walls in the lovely baby blue we had picked.- "We are kind of crowded here, imagine how it will be when the baby arrives."

- "Did you know moving is one of the three most stressful events in life?"- my husband asked almost shocked I had suggested moving. - "Statistically, over 45% of people consider it the most stressful event in life."- Spencer continued painting as he talked to me. I ran my hands down his shoulders and kissed his cheek.

- "Clearly, those people do not have our jobs."- he chuckled at my reply and looked at me with a sweet smile.

- "Do you like how the nursery is coming along?"

- "Very much. You have a lot of skills, Spencer Walter Reid."

- "Yes, I do, Mrs. Reid."- he stood up, left the roller on the tray, and wrapped his arms around me. - "How are you feeling today?"

- "Like I'm baby Reid's yoga gym."- my answer made Spencer chuckle as he carefully placed a lock of hair that fell in my face behind my ear and kissed the top of my nose.

- "You are a lovely gym."

- "Thank you."- Spencer hummed in contentment as I held him close to my body and kissed his neck. - "But we should start considering getting a house."

- "I know."- he whispered, his words muffled against my body.- "But... I don't..."

- "You don't wanna leave 'cos there are too many memories here you don't wanna forget?"- I murmured and played with Spencer's hair as I felt him nodding.- "You know you have an eidetic memory. It's not like you are gonna forget anything so easily."

- "I know. But you know how I feel about change. It's... hard."- Spencer pouted as he looked at me, and his sweet eyes looked at me with love and a dash of fear.

- "Nothing's gonna change if we move from this apartment. Except maybe we won't be so crowded."- I teased him playfully and he chuckled.

- "I wanna give you everything you want. If you want to move to a house, I wanna do it for you. I wanna be able to give you the house of your dreams."- his words touched me and nearly brought tears to my eyes. I had to bite my lips as I stared at him in silence, nodding at his words.

- "The house of my dreams is any place I live with you and our babies."- my words brought a big smile to Spencer's lips and eyes. A smile that was interrupted by the sound of my cell phone.

- "Please don't tell me we have a case."- my husband murmured as I walked out of the room. Raven was watching a movie in the living room and coloring a book.

- "No, it's my mom. She and my Dad are coming for dinner. Hey mom!"

I wish I could tell you Spencer got better at dealing with changes. But he didn't. It has always been hard for him. There are things you can be prepared for to change, like our kids. We both know they are gonna grow up, move out and be independent. We know that and we have made peace with that thought. But there are things you never see coming. Things that hit you, like a blow on the face, and that make you reconsider everything you think you believe in.

And guess what? That's what happened next.

The following Wednesday we were at the office when Garcia announced we had a case. I was sitting at my desk going through some paperwork and eating the third orange of the day. I was going through a very citrus stage30 weeks into pregnancy. Oranges and lemons were my regular cravings.

Morgan looked nervous when he met us in the conference room. He walked in with Rossi, and Garcia started briefing us in no time. Twenty minutes later, I was calling my mom to tell her we were on our way to Los Angeles to catch another serial killer.

Morgan didn't only look nervous during the debriefing, he was anxious the entire time. During the flight, he was constantly checking on his phone, frowning. It wasn't until we were ready to go back home, later that very same night, that Rossi explained to me that Savannah had asked him "to talk". And knowing Morgan as well as I do know him, it was clear he was overthinking everything and anything that he might have done wrong to upset his girlfriend. That man was whipped. That was something I sweetly reminded him of every time he tried to make fun of my husband for loving me so much.

I was just talking with Spencer about that on our way to pick up Raven from my mother's when we got a call from Hotch. My stomach turned into a knot right away. We had just finished a case, that wasn't a good sign.

- "Morgan was taken."

And I was sadly right. It was something incredibly bad.

Spencer's point of view

Things I can't stop thinking about the day Morgan was taken. I drove us to the crime scene as fast as possible and none of us said a word the entire car trip. (Y/N) just landed her hand on my tight and kept it there, caressing me from time to time, as a way to reassure me she was there for me.

I also remember getting out of that car and nearly shoving the police force, desperate to see and know what had happened to my best friend. My wife held my arm and stopped me, as she did all the talking. I was too worried to be even polite. The entire time I felt I was reliving the day Prentiss was taken from us.

JJ got there a few minutes later and ended up talking with the cops as we checked our surroundings and Derek's car. There I found a packet I immediately took and turned to my wife.

- "Let's go back to the BAU."

Savannah was locked talking with Rossi when we got there. Hotch walked down the stairs and stared at us with a stern glance. It was obvious we were all still in the dark about what was happening and why.

- "What did you find?"- Hotch asked as he stood in front of us.

- "No sign of him. But they left this in his car at the parking lot."- I said as I handed it to him.

- "How is Savannah?"- (Y/N) asked, trying and failing to catch a glimpse of her in the office.

- "She is being brave."- Hotch whispered.

- "Poor thing, I'm sure she is going crazy."- my wife replied, mostly to herself and it wounded me to know she actually understood how Savannah was feeling. And I never wanted to put her under that pain again.

- "Could she tell you anything?"- JJ asked, which I knew was the right thing to ask 'cos we had a case to solve, but yet, it felt cold considering the circumstances.

- "She said she thought she heard three attackers and that Morgan sounded drugged before they cut off the call."- Hotch explained and we all nodded.

- "Then it's a coordinated, planned attack, most likely professional."- JJ pointed out the obvious and (Y/N) took the thoughts from my mind as she said.

- "We did just take down a network of online hitmen, but if this is blowback, why Morgan?"

- "We have to assume that we're all targeted."- Hotch's words felt like a stab. - "I've put protective details on each of our families, but I want Savannah to stay here."

(Y/N) gripped my arm as we heard those words. Just what we had always been scared of. Risking our daughter's well-being because of work.

- "It's just until we know what is going on."- Hotch assured us as I wrapped an arm around my wife, trying to calm her down. Something I knew was impossible to do under those circumstances.

- "I'm gonna call mom."- (Y/N) whispered and we nodded. Hotch asked me to ask Rossi to meet us in the conference room 'cause Penelope had some updates, so I knocked on his door and slowly showed in my head. Savannah was pacing inside the office, as scared and nervous as I expected to see her.

- "Garcia needs us."- I waited for Rossi to leave his office and walked in. Savannah was still standing in the middle of it, trying to put herself together.

- "I'm sorry."- I whispered as I looked at her.- "I swear we are going to find him and bring him back."- I added as her eyes watered up. I took a few steps closer and wrapped my arms around her, carefully. She reciprocated and sobbed on my shoulder for a few seconds.

- "Thank you."- I heard her whisper and I nodded silently.

- "Hey Sav."- (Y/N) said from the door.- "Can I get you anything?"- Savannah just shook her head and I walked to stand next to my wife.

- "Just get him back soon."

- "We are doing our best."- I answered immediately as I grabbed (Y/N)'s hand and we slowly started walking to the conference room.

How were we going to deal with Morgan's abduction? I had no idea. Not considering Hotch's words: all our families could be targeted. And I refused to think my job was jeopardizing Raven's safety.

- "This is the block Derek was taken from."- Garcia pointed at the screen. - "That blue dot is him. And then at 9:23, we lost him. So I checked all the other cell signals in the area. They're all legit, aside from one that I was only able to find thanks to some technology no one outside this room needs to know about."

- "What is that?"- I asked, trying to understand what Garcia was implying.

- "An encrypted signal most likely bouncing off a satellite."- Hotch explained simply.

- "I know we're thinking this would be tied to our Darknet investigation, but satellite encryption is much higher in technology than most online crimes."

- "That's true, but the hitmen are still our best lead. We need to exhaust that before we move on to other theories."- Hotch added immediately and then turned to my wife. - "JJ, you (Y/N), and Garcia will take an armed agent to Savannah's house and get her to pack a bag."

- "Yes, sir. Absolutely. But why me?"- Pen questioned, confused.

- "Because while she gathers her things, you are going to see if they were under surveillance."- (Y/N) explained immediately as Hotch nodded and added.

- "Whoever's behind this has been planning this for weeks, if not months. We have no time to catch up. Let's move."

(Y/N)'s point of view

As Penelope checked the local routers and did her computer magic and JJ talked with the neighbors, I helped Savannah pack a few things to take back to the BAU.

Ok, the concept of "helping" could have been a little too generous of me, I was too pregnant to stay on my feet for too long, but let's say I was with her as she packed, and gave her all my moral support.

- "Are you sure you should be working?"- Savannah asked as she grabbed some things from the bathroom.

- "We are not turning this to me. How are you doing with all this?"

- "I hate the fact I live with a profiler and I know things about these cases."- she whispered and shook her head as she opened another drawer and grabbed a sweater. - "I just need to put those thoughts aside and focus on Derek. He is coming back. He has to come back."

- "Of course he will. He is one fucking tough nut to crack. I'm sure he is kicking ass as we speak."- I tried to be as positive as possible, knowing the hell my friend was going through. And I guess that's exactly what she was thinking, 'cos she carefully sat on her bed, next to me, and sighed.

- "Who do you do it?"

- "Do what? Stay positive?"

- "No. How do you deal with Spencer facing all these... threats day after day?"

I sighed and held her hand. There was nothing I could say that could help her process everything she was going through. So I just told her my experience. My dark and painful experience.

- "Sav, like ten years ago, Spencer was abducted, tortured on camera, and drugged for over three days. And during that time, I was a monster. I couldn't think right, I didn't sleep, couldn't eat, and yelled at every single team member that came across my path. Trust me when I tell you I know exactly how you feel."- her eyes wide opened as she heard the short version of some of the darkest days of my life. - "There is nothing I can tell you that might help you deal with this except my promise: we won't give up until he is back. 'Cause he is our family, and we are not going to rest until we bring him home."

- "I'm... I'm pregnant."- Savannah whispered and broke into tears. I wrapped my arms around her and though I wanted to tell her congratulations, it felt like it was the wrong timing.

- "Hey, hey, this is great news. Morgan is going to be so excited when you tell him."

- "I just don't know if I'll be able to tell him."

- "Come on! Don't lose hope in us yet."- I cut her a smile as she wiped the tears off her face. - "You are gonna be an amazing mother, Sav."

- "Thank you, (Y/N)."- I cut her a short smile and ran a hand through my very big belly.

- "I'm glad I'm not gonna be alone in this, we can schedule playdates."- her eyes shone at the idea and it made me feel better to give her a little break from all the pain and angst she was going through.

- "Please don't tell anyone yet."

- "Of course not."

- "Guys?"- JJ's voice downstairs ended our little moment. Savannah grabbed her bag and I helped gather a few more things before we went downstairs.

- "Bags already"- I announced as I saw her standing in the lobby with another agent, who was escorting us.

- "Hey. So I just talked to your neighbors."- JJ announced - "They didn't see anything, and I didn't find anything forensic outside."

- "So, they weren't peeping at us through our windows? Thank God for that, I guess."- Savannah sort of joked as walked to Garcia and rested my hands on her shoulders.

- "That means you are our only hope, Pen."

- "I'm finishing my diagnostic now, munchkin and I think I have something."- Garcia turned to Savannah and asked - "Do you have a wireless router on your DVR?"- like it was the first thing you know about your house.

- "Uh, I think so?"

- "Ok. They used it as their back door. And then the encrypted phone call, this is the hacking version of that same thing, and..."- she made a short pause and gasped, shocked. Shit, that wasn't good.- "Oh, man, they were all up your business."

- "Was it the same unsubs?"

- "My money says yes, but what's weird is they used an intranet."

- "What is that?"- Sav asked, confused.

- "It's a private closed system. They use a portal to a public page."- Pen asked in the simplest way she could, and just like that, the CIA homepage appeared on the screen in front of us.

- "Will someone explain why the CIA would abduct Derek?"- Savannah questioned and none of us knew how to answer that just yet.

No one slept that night. Sav was in Rossi's office, pacing nonstop and drinking herbal tea. We took turns to keep her company, me, and Garcia. Spencer tried to push me into sleeping, but he knew none of us could have more than an hour of sleep under those circumstances. We were all worried sick. And it didn't get any better the following morning when we finally found out who had taken out friends.

Short version of the facts: a group of freelance mercenaries, who specialized in taking up jobs that involved abducting and torturing victims to extract sensitive information out of them, had taken Morgan. Why? They were hired by Chazz Montolo to target Derek, the one SSA he blamed for the death of his son, Giuseppe.

The fucking Dirty Dozen was still hunting our team. Even from beyond the grave.

Spencer's point of view

I could see the exhaustion on the team's faces as we sat across the table. It was around four in the morning, none of us had closed an eye. (Y/N) was sitting next to Rossi, and she kept caressing her belly as I stood by her side, resting my hands on her shoulders, trying to give her some comfort. I don't think I could promise her everything was going to be ok, 'cos at that point, and at that hour, it's always hard to stay positive.

Until Pen rushed in, holding her computer, and nearly yelling.

- "I may have a line on !! I just got notification from Fort Eustis!"- we all turned to her as she sat at the table, hyperventilating as she explained. - "That encrypted SAT phone, it became active again and we managed to pin down one side to here. It is a 20-mile radius in Virginia. The other side was to a contractor who didn't even bother not to use his own cell phone."

- "Arrogant. He thinks we can't find him."- Rossi pointed out as we all stared at the screen.

- "And he would be wrong."- Pen added as she kept typing as fast as possible. - "He being John Bradley, not S.A.S. as we had suspected. Bradley and Mr. Who Dares Wins tried to become S.A.S., but they couldn't cut it, not to mention people who are S.A.S. don't get tattoos saying S.A.S. because S.A.S. is covert. That is the point. But apparently, people who are dishonorably discharged from the British Royal Marines do get that tattoo."

- "Pen, breath."- (Y/N) caressed her arm as she cut her a short warm smile, doing her best to help Garcia process everything that was going on.

- "Thank you, munchkin..."- Garcia whispered.

- "Your last ping has him in Derek's direction. He's probably on his way to him now."- I said, my eyes glued to the screen. I could feel the anticipation, the need to end whoever was hurting my brother. We had to save him.

- "We've got helos on the roof standing by for immediate transport."- Hotch added as JJ asked.

- "Any way we can narrow down the search?"

- "Yes."- Garcia replied with satisfaction- "Their encryption algorithms are dust. If and when that SAT phone connects, I've got him."

Not even five seconds later, there was a beep, someone had picked up the phone.

- "Sir... it went live."- Garcia announced, with a shake of fear and hope in her voice.

I ran to the elevator and pushed the button. The team stepped in as I turned around and looked at my wife, standing next to Garcia. I ran back to her, cradled her face, and kissed her lips gently and quickly.

- "We'll bring him back, chipmunk. I swear."

- "Please be safe."- she replied, angst written all over her face, and I just nodded.

- "Hurry up, Reid"- JJ called from the elevator. I ran and pushed the button to close the door, locking eyes with my wife as I nodded at her one more time, sealing my promise. We were bringing Morgan back.

A helicopter took us to the location. During the entire ride, all I could think of were all the moments I had shared with Derek and who, despite all odds, he had become more than just my best friend, he was my brother. He teased me, took care of me, joked with me, and even tried to be my wingman a few times before I had the nerve to face my true feelings for a certain team member.

- "I just wanna tell her I love her. I need to tell her what I feel for her 'cos now I can see there might be a chance she loves me too!"- I was drunk, drinking whisky with Morgan at a random bar, finally openly facing my feelings for (Y/N). The scene didn't stop replaying in my head, 'cos it was a very important moment of my life he had been a crucial part of.

- "Might be a chance?"- Morgan frowned and shook his head- "Kid, that woman is head over feet in love with you. And she has been for years. I just can't believe you've wasted all these years!!"

Morgan had been there the entire time I had worked at the BAU. He had taught me how to kick doors (a skill very much needed as an SSA agent if you ask him), he taught me how to flirt, or at least he tried, and he supported me every single time I needed it. For Christ's Sake! He had taught me how to play baseball as soon as the doctor said me and (Y/N) were having a boy. He had tried once when he needed a player for an FBI match, but that last time I asked him for help 'cos I wanted to be able to share nice memories with my kids.

- "Ok, you see my hips? See my hips? You swing right through, nice and easy. All right, come on. You give it a try."- Morgan made it look like it was the easiest thing in the world, but hitting that ball with that base had to be the hardest task I had ever had to face.

- "I know you are trying to make it easy, but trust me, this is not gonna work."- I argued as I walked to the base to take position.

- "Hey, you asked for my help 'cos you wanted to teach your kids how to play baseball, so fucking learn to have fun, Reid."- he had a teasing smirk on his face, 'cos he knew no matter how much I argued, I wasn't going to quit. 'Cos it was something I wanted to do for my kids.

- "Believe it or not, most of my childhood sports memories aren't altogether pleasant."

- "Exactly, and you don't want your kids to go through the same, do you?"- I shook my head and took a deep breath.- "Good. Now grab the bat, get up there, and give it a try."

I followed his instructions and tried to imagine what playing with my kids would be like. I already enjoyed having Raven in my life, but now with a second baby, life was about to get even better, and louder. And Morgan wanted to help me make more special memories with them.

- "Get up there. You're gonna like this, kid. I promise."- he stared at me, a silly grin on his face. I could read it all over his features, how he was thinking about how far we had gotten together. So I smiled back at him and he nodded.

- "Here we go, Reid!"

- "Spence?"- JJ grabbed my hand and took me from my thoughts- "We are landing, are you ready?"

- "Yeah, let's bring Morgan back."

There was no way I was not gonna fight to bring him back to Savannah and the team.

The BAU and the SWAT team that was with us surrounded the entire cabin. I took the lead through the back door quietly and heard voices coming from the living room. I held my gun tight and tried to keep my head cold and in the moment. I couldn't miss. This was too important to overthink.

- "Wake!"- someone said as I walked slowly through the kitchen door and saw Morgan barely alive, bleeding on the floor. And he made eye contact with me for a moment, knowing I was there to save him.

- "Wake up. It's time to die."

- "Not yet."- Derek mumbled and before the murderer could hurt him, I pulled the trigger three times and ended him right there. Rossi and Hotch burst into the room and ordered medical assistance, as I rushed toward my friend and kneeled next to him. His right hand was stabbed against the table and he had lost a lot of blood. We all stayed by his side until medics came and took him to the ambulance. I couldn't leave his side as he mumbled incoherence, barely conscious.

- "What is it Morgan?"- I asked him and touched his arm carefully, just to let him know I was close.- "What is it?"

- "I'm scared, pop."- he replied and I froze. I was scared too. I didn't want to lose him.

The flight back to the BAU was quiet. I called (Y/N) before we took off and told her what had happened, making my best effort not to cry. She said she was driving Savannah to the hospital along with Garcia, and that she'd wait for me there.

- "Are you ok?"- JJ held my hands as I hung up the phone. I nodded as I kept staring at the space in front of me, lost in thoughts. The way they had treated Morgan, how they had clearly tortured him, it hurt. We had been fast enough to bring him back to his family on time, but only for a few minutes. What if he didn't make it? What if he had been hurt too badly?

- "Morgan is gonna be ok"- JJ said as she kept holding both my hands. I just nodded and didn't say a thing. She wrapped her arms around me tight as I did my best to keep myself together. I just wanted to be back with my wife and daughter and keep them safe forever.

Often, as you can see, I wonder why we didn't leave the BAU sooner. All the signs were there. Especially JJ's.

Next chapter

#spencer reid #criminal minds #babymetaldoll writes #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fanfiction #criminal minds fanfiction #spencer reid x you #spencer reid needs a hug #poor morgan

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bringbacktim · 1 year ago

Text

Anal? No one's doing anal

I'm having a Jschlatt brainrot rn so expect more imagines than anyone wants , feel free to request anything

Synopsis: schlatt and y/n are putting together a desk , but it sounds inappropriate to Charlie outside the room , he gets worried like any friend would

Warnings:mentions of anal , hurt , sexual intercourse, innuendos, a whole lot of whacky stuff , not proofread or edited

Word count: 806 words

The only things that charlie could hear from the outside of the OTK office/filming room were things that would definitely give him nightmares and make him avoid Schlatt and Y/n for the foreseeable future

Who said I can't put this fucking thing in that hole " schlatt said practically shouting out of anger

"Me ! , for the hundredth time it shouldn't go there no matter how much you ask" his girlfriend answered

"Tell me that doesn't look like it'll fit in there"

"I am not turning around , I know I'm right . Now hurry up before Charlie or Ted get back"

Charlie was torn between making some loud noise and hoping they'd stop whatever they sound like they're doing or running away and never speaking to them again

He did neither out of pure terror and instead pulled out his phone to text Ted to see if this was some skit or some prank they were playing or whether they were actually doing that in the studio where they filmed

'Hey dude, do you know what Y/n and Shclatt are doing in the studio?' He texted simply not bothering to beat around the bush

'Anal by the sounds of it , but I have no clue, didn't want to know to be honest'

Charlie really didn't want the first bit to be true , especially since he was only there to hold one of the cameras while they filmed stuff . He was getting way more than he bargained for

'Gross , don't joke about that or it'll come true' he replied a grimace on his face

'They've been at it for a solid half hour , they should be done soon don't worry man'

'Don't worry man ? You clearly aren't hearing this' charlie scoffed at Ted's audacity

'I escaped with minimal trauma thankfully' he could feel Ted's smugness through the screen

'And you didn't think to take me with you?'

'Didn't know if they wanted you to film it'

'You're disgusting nivison' and with that he put his phone back in his pocket and tried to plan what he was going to do next

"I fucking told you that wouldn't fit, are you done trying yet ?"

"It's going to fit I don't care what you say you god damn bitch" at that charlie knew he had to do something for the safety of his friends

So he did what anyone would do and knocked on the door rather harshly to make sure he was heard

"Yeah , uh kinda busy" He heard y/n say

"I know you guys are in love , but that's a recording room . Also are you okay ?"

"Yeah fine just pissed at this furniture" schlatt admitted

"Schlatt!" Y/n said scolding him

"Are you both decent? Can I come in?"

"Yeah why wouldn't we be" they both simultaneously spoke

The situation he opened the door to was definitely not what he was expecting, but in a good way

They were just trying to put a new coffee table together to replace the one Schlatt broke in the previous recording

"Oh thank god" Charlie said with a hand over his heart as he breathed a sigh of relief "we thought you were doing anal"

"Anal? No one's doing anal , I'm not allowed to anymore" that comment earned him a firm slap to the chest

"Please stop talking, for my sake" charlie begged

At that charlie showed them the texts him and Ted had sent and they put the pieces together

"Oh charlie I'm so sorry you heard that , we just wanted to surprise you with the new coffee table before the next video" y/n apologised to her friend as her boyfriend loudly laughed next to her

"That's so fucking funny man , how did we not realise" he said wiping a tear from his eye "you look so terrified man" he said still laughing and using Charlie's shoulder as a stabilizer

"Is that why ted left?" Y/n asked shocked that everyone thought they were doing such a thing "this is so embarrassing and it's all your fault" she said pointing at her boyfriend who broke the table in the first place

"You have to admit that it's kinda funny" he said turning to face his girlfriend as Charlie called Ted and told him he can come back

"Charlie has the worst luck when it comes to us" she said sympathy evident in her voice "remember when he walked in on us in Ted's bathroom at that party"

"Be thankful it was him and not Ted" this earned him a middle finger in his direction

"What a wacky day it's been" Ted said entering the room they all were in

"You haven't been here for half of it " charlie accused as they chatted about what to film next

#schlatt x reader #schlatt #charlie slimecicle x reader #ted nivison #mcyt tag #jschlatt imagine #jschlatt imagines #jschlatt smut

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felixsramen · 1 year ago

Text

Yours Truly

This is part 20 to my Skz poly fic.

Previous<<<< Next>>>>

Warnings: None

You have a feeling of who it is already. Seungmin and Minho look at you as you grab your phone. You see the caller id. 'Innie'. You wonder if you should pick up or not but before you know it your hand hits the accept button.

You bring the phone to your ear. "Y/N? Are you there? I'm so fucking sorry." He says and you wonder if you shouldn't have answered.

"Do you guys not like me?" Comes out of your mouth before you realize what you said. There's silence for a second and you wonder if he's going to answer.

"No. God no. Y/N we like you so much." I.N. says sounding guilty. "Hyunjin didn't mean what he said." You hear a door open over the phone and the sound of footsteps.

"Is that Y/N? Please let it be Y/N." You hear what sounds like Hyunjin say. "Yeah. It's Y/N." I.N. replies back.

"Hyunjin wants to talk to you. Do you want to talk to him?" I.N. asks you. You look over to Minho and Seungmin who don't say anything or give off that you should.

You take a deep breath to steady yourself. "Yeah." You say softly and you hear the phone move around.

"Hello?" Hyunjin says almost unsure that you'd answer. "Hey." You say back and you hear Hyunjin let out a sigh of relief when he hears your voice.

"Fuck I'm so sorry. I know sorry won't fix anything but I'm so sorry. You deserve to be pissed or upset. I don't hold it against you. You're not just anyone you are one of us. I don't even know why I said that." Hyunjin says rambling on. You look over to Minho and Seungmin but they give you a small smile.

You sigh as Hyunjin continues on. "Hyunjin." You say softly and that shuts him up. "I'm not going to say it's okay. It's not but we miss you guys. I know it hasn't been that long but we miss you guys a lot." You say softly and you hear Hyunjin let out a soft sigh.

"God we miss you guys too. We miss you guys so much." He says back. He lets out a sigh of his own.

"This isn't to guilt trip you guys or anything. You don't have to come home. The boys don't want you to come home if you guys aren't ready and neither do I but Chan locked himself in his studio. He hasn't been out since the day you all left. He only comes out to eat or go to the bathroom." Hyunjin tells you and you can't help but worry about him.

"Don't feel guilty about it. Don't come home because I told you guys. Come home because you want to. Your own free will." He says finishing and you look to the boys sitting beside you. Seungmin reaches out a hand and takes yours in his.

"Jisung hasn't been sleeping well either though. We're all in our heads about it because we feel so guilty. I wanted you guys to know that though. It's not the same without you guys. We all want you guys home of course we do but not if you guys aren't ready to be home." He says telling you.

You nod as if he can see you. "We'll talk about it and decide." You tell him and he lets out a relieved sigh.

"Take your time. We miss you guys as much as you miss us. The door is unlocked and ready whenever you guys are. You all are our worlds okay?" He says wanting to make sure you knew.

"Okay. I'll talk to the boys." You tell him. Seungmin squeezes your hand reassuring you.

"Okay. I hope you guys sleep well." He tells you. "You guys too." You say softly.

You hang up and let out a breath you had no idea you were holding. Seungmin looks at you and smiles softly at you while Minho reaches across and rubs your back.

"How do you feel?" Minho asks and you sigh softly. "Better." You say and Seungmin rests his head on your shoulder.

"Good." Minho says and you sigh once more. "Chan locked himself in the studio. Apparently doesn't come out much. Jisung isn't sleeping well either." You say and Minho nods.

"Are you ready to see them?" Minho asks. "I'm not sure yet." You say and Seungmin and Minho nod.

"Hyunjin said he didn't want us back if we don't want to come so that makes me feel better." You say and they nod.

Seungmin lifts his head from your shoulder. "Yeah. They don't ever try to make us feel bad for things we do. They haven't ever really tried guilt tripping us either about stuff." Seungmin says and this time you nod.

"Are you guys ready to see them?" You ask and Seungmin and Minho shrug. "I don't know. I miss them of course. I love them a lot too but what they said about you is hard for me to even think about." Seungmin says and Minho nods.

"They said a lot of stuff that I'm not sure if I were you that I could forgive. I'm just imagining if it was myself." Minho says and you nod at his words.

You sigh and squeeze Seungmins hand gently. "Is it bad I miss them though?" You say and they both shake their head.

"Of course not. You've gotten close to all of us. We also miss you when you're away. It's no different than that." Seungmin says softly and you nod.

You nod placing your own head on Seungmins shoulder. "Thank you." You say softly.

"Don't thank us. We haven't done anything special." He says and you shake your head. "Thank you guys for sticking up for me." You say softly.

"Always will." Minho says softly.

Taglist: @queenmea604 @lolareadsimagines @tinyworld18 @liv302 @jinniespuppy @stephy-nicole13 @freyaniobe @chansbabygirlsstuff @jkookiejiminlvr @hyuneyeon @sirenthalia @nagadiluc @tenshimara @leeknowleeknow @boi-bi-ahaha @shltsnglggles @jfkedldndkd @tinystarsthing @armystay89 @baby-fairy-yas @haileybugulug @freckleboilix @im-sinking-in-mud @thatoneperson1911 @lmaouwu @greysweaters-blog @katrodriguez99 @3rachasninja @amararosesblog @1alesakura @m4gg13-g @vampcharxter @noellllslut @berryberrytan @junebug032 @jeonginwvr @jeongchaos @emyferra08 @stvrfir3 @feybin @mauvemelon @worcesheshestershiresauce @realrintaro @katsukis1wife

#poly skz #skz fluff #stray kids fluff

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osamusriceballs · 10 months ago

Text

The Accident - Part XVI

Atsumu x fem reader

Warnings: Stalking, kinda dry humping

Words: ~ 2,5 k

About: Y/n and Atsumu finally TALK. And more.

Part I II -> Next Part

A yawn escapes your lips as you slowly open your eyes to a dimly lit room. It's probably the middle of the day, judging by the way it looks outside. You surprisingly feel fully rested, with Atsumu still peacefully snoozing behind you, his arm loosely draped across your stomach. Your mind races back to the events of the previous night, causing your heart to skip a beat.

That woman.

Atsumu needs to do a lot of explaining to make up for that. If there is even a way to make up for that. You still don't know anything about her, but she for sure gives you the chills.

Maybe it was a mistake. To stay with him- even in the same bed, and to allow your heart to get that foolish hope again. But you're just human, and it seems like your heart isn't so easily convinced that he's not good for you.

You sigh and reach for your phone on the nightstand, noting how late it is—2 pm. Shocked by the time, you check your messages and spot surprisingly many from Osamu Miya and hesitantly tap on them.

Osamu: hope yer alright

Osamu: let me know when you’re home

Osamu: did ya fall asleep?

Osamu: thank you for your help. I owe ya. Call me if ya need anything. Stay safe.

Osamu: good morning. Grab that idiot and come over to Onigiri Miya when yer awake. Or come on your own when he messes up. Drinks are on the house for you.

Osamu: not for Tsumu tho. He can pay double

A smile plays on your lips as you respond quickly.

You: hey! Sorry for the late reply, I fell asleep. Atsumu‘s still sleeping. I‘ll talk to him and let you know if we‘re coming. Thank you for the offer! :)

Osamu: sure. see ya

You: see you :)

Your attention is diverted when Atsumu stirs, his arm now wrapping around your waist as he clumsily pulls you closer. He groans and nuzzles against your neck, a sound that sends a shiver down your spine. Is he aware that it's you he's holding? And does he even remember last night? You somehow doubt it.

"Y/n?" he mumbles after a moment, and your eyebrows shoot up, but you respond with a soft hum and nod.

"Yer—how?" he slowly questions, his face still heavy with sleep. You gently take his hand and remove it from your waist, scooting away enough to turn and face him. His eyes are tired, his expression soft while he fights to fully wake up. You just hope that he doesn't feel too horribly after all that drinking. His team will kill him for sure if he has practice today. You really hope that it's his day off.

"I brought you home. Remember that you had a few drinks at Onigiri Miya's?" you say, trying to sound neutral, though bitterness lingers in your tone. He stares at you blankly until embarrassment and guilt crease his features.

"Yeah, right. I'm—y/n, I'm sorry for that. Thank ya for bringin' me home. I'm just kinda... havin' a hard time." He closes his eyes for a short second and takes a deep breath. He suddenly looks so exhausted that it almost breaks your heart.

"Hard time with what? Work?"

He shakes his head, closing his eyes again, and a weariness settles over his face, despite the ample sleep you both received. "Work's fine. Great, actually. Gotta play with some real amazin' players. I even got to see Aran often again; that's fine. Just..." He opens his eyes, sadness evident. "Just?" you prompt, your heart skipping a beat at his gaze. You know that it has to do with you—you just don't know what exactly it is. And the urge to interrogate him is burning strong in your body.

"I never got the chance to talk to ya after that night," he admits. You nod, urging him to continue, to finally give you some answers. "I wanted to apologize. For kissin' ya. I made ya uncomfortable, ruined everything."

Your confusion is palpable—just what is wrong with him? He should tell you about that woman and not that! And that definitely didn't sound like he wanted to do it again, which feels like a stab to your heart and somehow angers you.

"Uhm... Atsumu, that was not quite what I expected. Like, sure, I've been thinking about that kiss and my feelings for you, but I was more taken aback when you blocked me and invited another girl over, literally the same night we had our kind-of-date."

His face drops after listening to you, confusion and worry etched on his features. "What are ya talkin' about? I never blocked ya, and I sure as heck didn't invite any other girl here. Hell, I don't even talk to women outside of work. Who should I bring here?"

"Brunette? Perfect smile and wearing one of your shirts? Could hardly miss her on my way down. Or when we met her yesterday. Do you have her over at your place every night?" you retort, ignoring his repulsed expression at your description of her. You could almost believe that he doesn't like her at the way he scrunches his nose.

"Her? Ya met her? Yesterday?"

You nod, narrowing your eyes as you recall her vicious features after that scene. But wow, you were definitely embarrassing. How you acted possessively towards Atsumu. Will she laugh about it with him as soon as they meet each other again?

His reaction surprises you, though; he suddenly reaches for you, pulling you a bit closer. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry for gettin' ya involved in this. Are ya okay? She didn't do anything to ya, did she?" You stare at him, confused, and shake your head. His worry confuses you. Why bother after not talking to you for so long?

"Can't believe she dared to come here again. If ya ever see her again, you have to call the police. I have a restraining order against her." Your eyes widen surprised at his words and you frown.

"Restraining order? Is she... like a crazy ex?" Dread fills your stomach at the thought, and a suspicion arises within you.

He slowly shakes his head. "She's a very obsessed fan, to put it nicely. She's been stalking me for a while. Started innocently; I noticed that she came to Onigiri Miya every time I was there too. Then I noticed her when I went for walks every other day, always waitin' at the same spot for me and trying to talk to me. And then one day, I noticed that stuff from my apartment started to go missing. That was like two years ago. I contacted the police after I caught her breaking into my apartment, and she got arrested. Haven't seen her since then, but she started showing up since that one night with ya." He groans and you can see just how much stress this situation caused him. He looks so tired while talking about it, it almost breaks your heart.

"I don't know how she found me again," he continues. "She broke into my apartment, and I had video proof fortunately, so I could file a case, and I have a restraining order against her now. She can't show up again, or she'll land in jail. I also had to get a new phone and number; she did something with it. Tried calling ya with the new one, but ya never called back."

You listen to the story with watery eyes. That woman is actually a stalker?! And he had been suffering like that all the time? Tears well up, and you try to calm yourself. So he wasn't ignoring you on purpose. He actually tried to reach out, and you probably ignored his messages, and he felt miserable because he put you in that situation. Hell, someone broke into his apartment. This must have been horrible for him. You're just glad that she at least cannot legally come here again. Even though it doesn't seem to stop her. A part of you hopes that she'll show up again. The thought of her in jail does sound kind of appealing to you- and not just because you were kind of jealous before. She is danger, and you pray that she won't show up again. Maybe she'll stop now that she knows that he's taken- even though she does not seem to respect boundaries. Your thoughts are running, you don't even know what to say at this point. How could you be mad with him after this?

A ray of hope suddenly flashes before your eyes, and you feel your heart flutter. You know that it's selfish to think about your foolish feelings, to think about how much you like him and to wonder if he reciprocates these feelings. But this means that you might mean something to him. This means that he might like you just like you like him, if he has tried contacting you and kept his distance to protect you.

"So... uhm... you weren't ghosting me because of the kiss?" You feel so, so foolish for asking, but your heart longs for confirmation. You'll deal with the stalker after finally finding out about his feelings. After waiting for him for so long, you need to know.

"I didn't want to ghost ya at all, y/n. I really like ya." His eyes catch yours, and you feel butterflies in your stomach once again. He doesn't seem to mind that you changed the topic like that and you know that you look at him like a hopeful lost puppy. He still has that magical effect on you. Everything just feels so right with him, like you're just where you belong. He's so close; you could probably count his lashes, and you can see the flecks of different shades of brown in his eyes.

"I was actually... really sad because we parted like that. I didn't mean to give you the impression that something's wrong—I just thought you'd see this as a game, and nothing more. That I'm just an easy way to spend time for you. Nothing more." You feel so vulnerable when you say these words, but he quickly shakes his head, looking at you with hurt in his eyes.

"I'm sorry. Y/n, I'll make it up to ya, 'kay? Please. Let me make it right." You melt at his words, only managing to nod. "O-okay." This feels like a dream come true. You can't believe that you're making up with him like this- after carrying his drunk ass home and sleeping in his bed. But you just feel so good when you're with him, and for once you decide to be selfish and to take what you need.

He looks at you, clearly stunned. "Okay? Just like that? I was ready to get on my knees to beg for forgiveness and to buy some more diamonds for you." A soft laugh escapes your lips, and he seems to lighten up at your reaction too.

"Making up to me could definitely include some groveling. I wouldn't mind seeing you on your knees, actually. I don't remember you getting on your knees for me ever, even though we are married." You smile, feeling the tension leaving your body. Only he can make you feel like this.

"Oh?" He grins, and you suddenly feel giddy. "Let me refresh yer memories then." He jumps off the bed, lively and energetic suddenly, and you look at him stunned. "Come here." He pats the edge of the bed, and you slowly crawl there, probably not very elegant, but Atsumu still gazes at you like you're a princess that graced him with her presence. You sit up hesitantly, looking at Atsumu right in front of you, who smiles fondly and smoothly sinks down to one knee. He looks devilishly handsome with his disheveled hair, and you can't do anything else but stare at him. Is this a dream?

"Y/n Miya, I know I don't deserve it, but would ya give yer husband another chance? I promise to make ya happy and to never keep secrets like that from you ever again. I'll be whatever ya want me to be just to keep you happy." Your jaw drops at his words and you can't stop the butterflies in your stomach.

"Wow, uhm, that sounds pretty serious." You breathlessly laugh and he smiles with a sincere expression that makes you blush.

"I am. I kinda..." he sighs, running a hand through his hair, making it even messier and he looks even more attractive like this. "I kinda wanna go on dates with ya. Like real dating. Not just getting along because of the marriage thing."

You stare at him, not having expected this kind of answer. He's actually serious about this? And wants to go on dates with you?

"So uhm... what do ya say? Is that alright with you?" He looks bashful, and you finally manage to come up with a response, the one that your heart is longing for.

"I'd love to." The words come out softly, and you smile fondly at his reaction and the way he seems to light up. You don't even have time to realize what's happening- and then he suddenly raises just enough to be at eye level with you and then simply connects his lips with yours in a sweet kiss. You gasp, surprised, your hands coming up to his shirt to ground yourself, but melt into the feeling, allowing him to cup your cheeks and angle your face towards him to deepen the kiss.

This is not what you had expected at all, but feeling his lips against yours, his body pressing against yours—it's enough to make you feel hazy and giddy. You need more; you need to be closer to him. So you wrap your arms around him and pull him closer while leaning back until he's laying on top of you, urging him to stay close to you. He rests most of his weight on his arms, yet you still feel him on top of you, his body pressing gently against yours .

You open your lips, and he instantly uses the chance, softly licking against your lower lip before he slightly moves his tongue to meet yours. His hips press against yours, harder suddenly, and you can't help but wrap your legs around his waist and pull him down to you.

The position is intimate. Your most sensitive part pressing against his middle, and you suck in a sharp breath when you feel something growing in his pants the longer you keep kissing him. Your hands claw into his shirt when he carefully grinds against you—and you whimper against his lips needily, feeling heat rush through your body.

You both know this is where you should stop; you both have only solved your issues like five minutes ago, and some more things definitely need more clarification, but that's the least thing on your mind now. You- you want him.

And you breathe heavily when he pulls back, his lips wet from your combined saliva, looking unfairly hot with his dark widened pupils while he looks at you intensely.

...

TO BE CONTINUED

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starrywooyo · 9 months ago

Text

treasure: Six

synopsis: when y/n gets whooshed into an alternate universe, an adventure: one with pirates and monsters and much, much more

pairing: ot8! pirate ateez x fem! reader

genre: pirate au!!

!!warnings(per chapter)!! - [bellow cut!] no warnings i can think of- plz lmk if there is

notes: omg- guess who's backkkkk with an update!! I'm so sorry it's taken this long to get this chapter out.. i also split this chapter into 2 since i felt its a bit much to read with it being so long.. or do you guys not mind really long parts/chapters?? maybe i also done it to keep you guys in suspense too 😏😏

word count: 4.3k

taglist: (if you want removed or added to the list please lmk)

@toxic-babexe , @sunnyhokyu , @cambriel , @lelaleleb

if if missed anyone again just let me know! i also don't know where my tag list is so please let me know if you wanted added and are not on here

series masterlist | main masterlist

previous chapter | next chapter

previously:

hongjoong stands, placing his hands in the table, slightly leaning forward.

“I have some news I want to share” he says

your breath gets stuck in your throat. He doesn't know, does he??

“i have progress of our voyage for the Cromer.” he adds

everyone now gives him their full attention.

“thanks to sedna here, we have our heading. it'll be a long, dangerous journey but I know we as a team, a crew. can manage it!! we will get the cromer before they do”

You don't know how long, it’s most likely been days that have passed. All you can see from the horizon is the ocean and then more ocean.. Water as far as the eye can see.

Crew are starting to feel as though this mission is lost, that you were all lost on the sea, some starting to get bored out of their minds.

You sigh

“What’s wrong?” a voice asks

You close your book over

“Are we ever going to reach wherever it is we’re trying to get to yeosang?” you ask

He bookmarks his own book and lets out a small laugh.

“I’d tell you to be patient but I feel we’re all getting a bit restless these days, we’ll get there all in good time y/n.. Now let's continue reading shall we?” he replies and then proceeds to open his book to continue reading.

Deciding to do the same you reopen your own book and continue reading.

…

You toss and turn in your bed, unable to get some sleep. You still can't help the thoughts that pass through your mind. Tossing off the covers you pull your boots on and make your way through the ship.

It's mostly quiet as you walk down the corridor, the only thing to be heard being the waves crashing outside the ship and the slight creak of the wooden floorboards, the rest of the crew getting some kip while they can.

Walking up the stairs you slightly shiver from the nip from the cold air, rubbing your arms you take no notice of your surroundings and make your way to your spot you like to rest on at the front of the bow.

Leaning on the wood, you look out into the dark, there's not much visibility bar the light coming from the little lantern hanging down but when you look up, you’re in awe. The stars are out and shining bright. They look so… pretty. You wish you had a camera so you could capture this moment

Still gazing at the stars above you don't catch the sound of someone walking up behind you

“D’you like stargazing?”

You flinch turning to the voice

He laughs slightly “sorry didn't mean to scare ya” he says leaning beside you

You finally take in your surroundings you notice hongjoong is at the wheel and that's pretty much everyone who’s still awake

You turn back to him, he’s just looking at you intently

He gestures to the stars with his head and asks again.

“D’you like stargazing. y/n?” he asks.

“I do.. Do you like the stars, Yunho?” you ask him.

He smiles

“I do, being a lookout i get to see ‘em pretty much every night, i know a lot of the constellations too but what ‘re you doing awake at this time.. Can’t sleep??” he asks

You shake your head

He looks away for a second, then walks away a little bit and hold out his hand for you to take.

“Follow me”

You take ahold of his hand and he and he begins to lead you up the stairs past hongjoong at the helm to where the mizzen mast stands.

“Ladies first” he gestures to the rope ladder

And you climb up till you get to the barrel-like section at the top and yunho climbs in after you.

“It’s easier to see the stars from up here” he says and blows the candle out from the little lantern that's hung up in the mast so that he or wooyoung can have a little light when they need it. And then he sits beside you on the ground and tucks his legs up to his chest just like you.

Looking up you can see all the pretty twinkling lights and you’re in awe of them all.

A light tap on your shoulder brings you back to the man sitting beside you, and you listen and watch intently as he points out various stars and constellations and explains some of them to you

…

You shiver slightly rubbing your arms as a chill wind blows through you in the mast.

“Hmm cold?” yunho asks, tilting his head to the side a little.

You nod “ a little bit.. Yeah”

He shuffles about a bit in the space and opens the basket sitting in the corner, and pulls out a worn out greyish blue blanket

“ ‘ere “ he wraps the blanket around you and you pull it tighter around yourself

“it does get pretty chilly up here so there's a blanket in every basket for the three masts just in case you need that information” he laughs a bit and he sits back into his spot beside you on the ground and he wraps one of his arms around you pulling you closer to his side

“See that one ‘ere.. thats pleiades its-” he stops seeing you are now fast asleep he breathes out a laugh and then pulls you closer to his chest and then proceeds to fall asleep not long after you

…

You’re drawn out of your slumber from people talking in hushed tones, one of which you know to be yunho but the other you can't tell, still being in a haze.. The other person leaves.

“Yunho..” you voice out.

He hums

“What's the prettiest star youve seen?” you ask randomly still in your sleepy haze while wrapping your arms around his waist snuggling into him

“Hmm well… it's not actually a star but the aurora’s the most beautiful thing i've seen in my life time”

You smile and shut your eyes again resting your head on his chest

“I'd like to see that too” you say as you slowly drift off

Yunho rubs your back as you do

“I'll take you to see it.. Don't worry”

…

Your eyes flicker open and you stretch bones clicking in the process. Scanning your surroundings you see you’re still up in the mast with yunho still wrapped up in his arms as you shuffle around he stirs in his sleep, hands coming up to rub the sleep from his eyes.

“Hmm good morning” he says, his voice still laced with sleep.

You reply to him and the both of you begin to make your way to the kitchen to get something to eat before everyone else.

You grab a bread roll as does yunho as well as an apple that yunho reluctantly lets you cut up yourself with your history of knives.

“Thank you.. By the way” you say as you begin to nibble on your food “for last night.. I had a good sleep thanks to you, yunho” you smile.

“Don’t worry about it, m’glad you could get some rest”

You both sit and continue to eat your food in the peaceful silence quite content.. Until it wasn't- more of the crew came piling in to grab their own breakfast before getting to work and it's then that yunho leaves you to go do his own chores around the ship again. And you go and join yeosang again.

…

“So where is it exactly we’re going yeo??” you ask him

“Well we’re going here to this docking town to restock supplies then we’ll head east or ‘tis where captain says we need to go” he explains pointing places out to you on the map “not to worry though, we’re almost there i'd assume we’d be arriving to the dock at any minute”

And he was right, you were in fact pulling up to the dock but not 20 minutes later.

Most of the crew started flowing out the ship, stretching. Their feet finally on firm solid ground. Standing on the dock you watch in silence as members of the crew converse with the workers on the dock, seonghwa wagering with the man how many pieces of gold would grant the amount of time the ship could stay docked

In the distance you see hongjoong talking with sedna about what.. You don't know but it looks to be a serious conversation. The conversation stops and he seems to make his way back over to you all and he speaks.

“I want everyone to stock up on supplies they may need and rations for the ship as for seonghwa, mingi, jongho, yunho, wooyoung and san you all come with me.. y/n you stay with yeosang” he says then he claps his hands together.

“Okay. everyone get to work” he says and he and his little team head off.

…

And so you walk through the streets of the town with yeosang carrying some of the things he buys to help him carry them back. You’re bored out of your mind, it’s been a good few hours since hongjoong and the crew left to god knows where. And you wont lie, you’re curious so… you pester yeosang about it. To which he replies something about a mini mission for the actual mission..just boring stuff

“Hey y/n.. I'm gonna nip into this last shop real quick. Can you wait out here for a second?” yeosang asks you, you nod watching him through the window of the store after he enters.

Bored you end up zoning out looking in the opposite direction, lost in your own thoughts.

Something catches your attention, as you stare your features contort in confusion

What.. is.. that..!?

You must've been staring for a long time as you’re brought out from your trance from yeosang calling you

“y/n… you good?” he asks, looking worried.

You hum

“Hmm.. yeah.. I thought I saw..” you look back, the thing is no longer there “nothing.. nevermind ..”

And then the both of you head back to the ship.

…

The others didn't get back to the ship until a long while after you, some covered in cuts and other bruises.. Just what was the ‘mission’

San ushers those with cuts to his study to clean the wounds up the rest follow hongjoong to his cabin and you’re left in the dark.. Not included. So you just help the other crew carry the stock onto the ship

…

With the ship now stocked and ready for the vast journey on the water you can finally start the main voyage.

The main 8 currently gathered in the captains cabin, map sprawled out on the table as hongjoong points to the locations on the map and explains in detail the route to be taken for this quest.

They all end up piling out of the foom after a few hours

You sit in your cabin seemingly lost in deep thought

“A penny for yer thoughts y/n.. What's got yer mind so busy” there's a knock from the doorframe.

Being drawn from your thoughts your head snaps to the doorway.

Hongjoong leans on the frame, sleeves of his white button shirt rolled up and his jacket discarded, being held in his hands.

You frown.. Thinking about it some more

“It’s nothing” you brush it off

He sighs

“May i?” he asks, gesturing to your room, you nod and he enters placing his jacket on your bed and taking a seat next to you.

“It cant be nothin if its got you frowning like that.. Did somethin happen??” he asks slight worry on his face

“No.. nothing happened per say.. I just.. I don't know.. I saw something but i don't know if my brain was playing tricks on me”

“Whatd ye see? Maybe I can help if I know what it was?” he pries some more..

You turn to face him

“I thought i.. When you and the others went on that little mission.. When i was shopping with yeosang.. i .. i thought i saw you.. Only it wasn't you?? I don't know.. you had different clothes on and.. All black and a black hat too” you laugh “i’m going crazy right?” you ask him

Only a sinking feeling comes to your chest as you see his face, its pale as if the colours been drained out

“y/n.” he begins “if you see that person again or someone similar. I need you to tell me or one of the others.. Can you do that for me?” he asks

You nod.

He shakes his head “no. i need you to say you’ll do it. Promise me you will”

You tilt your head in confusion

“I will” you say

“Good” he starts to grab his jacket and stands to leave the room

“But hongjoong,who or what was that?” you ask

“You don’t need to know that right now” and with that he leaves the room.

…

The ship comes to a stop with a sudden jerk, an island in the close distance.

Hongjoong stands giving commands as the crew rushes about the ship preparing to leave the ship and get to the piece of land on the longboats.

Chucking equipment onto the small boats crew piling in and getting lowered to the ocean.

Most of you make it to land, some crew having to stay back and watch the ship.

This is it. The main island.. Whatever it is you're searching for. It's here.. Somewhere.

Making camp on the beach tents get set up in all different sizes as well as some crates as makeshift tables, a fire being planned to get set up in the middle of camp.

“Yunho, wooyoung go scout the surroundings and make sure its safe” hongjoong orders. And the two do as told with woo whining a tad.

“And y/n, mingi, jongho come with me.. Lets split up and get some firewood for that fire later”

And the four of you make your way up the sandy dunes to the entrance of the woods. And slowly you all creep in.

You walk a good few minutes in far enough in that there's branches and leaves

“Just take as much as you can carry, we won't be camped on the beach long, take just enough to keep the fire going overnight and to cook a dinner” hongjoong says and begins to pick up the sticks on the ground and the other three of you follow suit.

With arms now filled with branches and dry leaves for kindling you make your way back to camp on the beach and dump the wood on the ground where the fire will be set up. And seonghwa comes along and gets started on the fire and you watch him intently; he starts by taking stones from the beach to which you help and places them in a circle for the boundary of the fire, then taking the twigs and branches you all collected and places them neatly in the stone circle, lastly he takes the dried leaves and skaters them throughout the logs.

He pulls from his pocket a rock of flint and holds it securely on one of the big stones surrounding the unlit fire close to some of the kindling and he whips out a small steel dagger. He pauses-

And briefly looks up to you.

“You good?” he asks

You let out a hum

“It's just, you’ve been watching me for a while.. Is it really that interesting?” he asks

You nod

“Hmm! I always used to watch my da- i mean i just think its cool to watch” you tell him

He kind of looks at you with your first choice of words but he decides to not comment on it. And just nods along.

“Y’wanna try then?” he taps the sand beside him

You slightly laugh

“I don't know if i can do it but i'll certainly give it a shot” and you get on your knees beside him.

Seonghwa briefly shows you how to hold the flint and the angle to strike the dagger against it, once you're sure you’ve got the hang of it, you take the items from him and strike the blade against the rock.. Nothing happens the first few times but then all of a sudden a few sparks fly off and land on the leaves slightly letting some smoke travel in the air. Seonghwa gets closer to the leaves and gently blows on them and at last the fire is going!! It works its way through the other twigs and leaves until finally a big blazing fire lights up the camp.

“Why don't you go see what the others are doing and if they need any help while I get started on dinner” seonghwa tells you. And with a nod of your head you're off through the camp.

Walking around the camp you find jongho sitting cleaning out his gun, all the pieces laid out..

You sit in front of him and he looks up from cleaning and gives you an awkward smile

“y/n… hi” he says

“Hi Jongho”

The awkward smile still there he doesn't pay you any mind and goes back to cleaning

Damn this is awkward..

“So.. jongho..” you begin-

“Look y/n. With all due respect just leave me alone” he sort of snaps as he puts the cleaned gun back together “im not interested” he gets up and walks away.

Oh…

Disappointed you sit and look out to the waves.. The sun is starting to set, it hangs low in the sky

Someone takes the place of jongho..

“y/n?” they speak

“Captain.” you reply.

Hongjoong sits across from you.

“I.. um.. I have somethin’ for you.. Will you come with me a minute..?” he asks, his eyes darting everywhere bar into your own.. His cheeks slightly flushed

You let out a small yeah and get up to follow him, he leads you towards his tent and holds open the fabric for you to enter. Which you do.

Hongjoong enters after you and you take a look around the large tent.

There's a make-shift table to the right with a chair and to the left his bed, some clothes folded on top with his hat neatly placed against them and a rucksack laying on the floor at the foot of the bed and some oil lanterns hang in random spots

“y/n.. Come in. don’t just stand there..” he says now standing at the table so you walk closer to the table.

He clears his throat and places a medium-ish flat box on the table in front of you.

“I.. haha um.. It might be weird but.. I got you this.. I know you were lookin at one a while back..” as he rambles on you peel the lid of the box off and your eyes go wide

“A-and you don't have to like it. I know it's not the same one you saw.. And its probably weird that i bought you it-” he continues

“I love it” you whisper out

“That's okay.. Wait- you do?” he asks

You nod and take it out of the box. Inside was a pretty black lace up corset with little white and red flowers embroidered on going up the left side with green vines and on the right side in the same red as the flowers which looks to be an ‘A’ in a red circle.

Hongjoong watches as you look at the corset with pure happiness in your eyes and a smile goes onto his own face

You look to him

“This is probably one of the nicest gifts anyone has given me..thank you. Hongjoong.”

“Of course, I'm just glad you like it.. Now. let's go get something to eat shall we?” and you both go out to join everyone else around the fire to eat.

…

The next day you all wake up bright and early ready to make your journey into the dense forest. Getting ready, you pack your little bag first and change into your clothes: trousers and a nice white flowy shirt.. The corset catches your eye in the corner so you decide to put it on. undoing the laces you slip it over your torso and go to pull the laces shut.. Only you realise something. You can't do it by yourself.

You make your way to the entrance of your tent and slightly poke your head out..

You see hongjoong giving out orders and overseeing them as most people are packing up their things and tents, majority of the crew are busy though someone catches you sticking your head out, with a cheeky grin on his face he saunters over towards your tent, you quickly pull your head back in and hold the opening shut

“y/n~~ are you ready?? We’re about to head off” he says..

“i - nearly, i'm just getting ready but i-” you weigh up all the options in your mind. Cursing at yourself you pop your head back out again and look at the blonde who's still smiling, his arms crossed over his chest.

You bite your lip slightly “wooyoung” you sigh out “can you come in here and help me?” you ask

He frowns slightly and tilts his head

“Help? Hmm sure, but with what?” he asks

You pop back in the tent

Wooyoung follows in after you, brushing a hand through his blonde hair and when he finally looks at you he sucks in a breath.

“Y-you need help lacing that up..” he asks a faint yet prominent blush creeps its way onto his cheeks

You nod slowly.. “if .. you wouldn't mind” you add.

He quickly shakes his head.

“I don't mind” he says and he walks over to you.

You turn around for him and he takes hold of the laces with shaky hands

“Let me know if it's too tight.. Okay..? i don't wanna hurt you” he says and begins to fix the strings before pulling on them. You feel yourself being sucked in oh god you don’t know how those women in towns do this, He pulls them tight a few times before he's asking you if it's okay you tell him it's fine before he’s pulling some more more and then he ties the bow in the back. His hands rest on your waist for a moment.

“There” he whispers out.

“Thank you”

He smiles though you can't see it.

Turning around you grab your bag to head out. It's wooyoung's turn to look over you, he bites his lower lip looking away slightly before looking back to you.

“You look good.. It suits you, pretty” he says and you both leave the tent. He helps you pack the rest of your things and roll your tent up and attach it to your bag.

Walking over to the rest of the group by the forest entrance, the fact you're wearing his corset doesn't go unnoticed by hongjoong. A blush of his own coating his cheeks as well. He clears his throat and continues his ‘speech’ and not long after you're all off into the forest..

…

hongjoong leads the line from the front, map and compass in his hands. You don't know how long you walked for.. All you know is this island is bigger than it seems to be and all you've been seeing is trees, trees and even more trees. And you’re losing daylight again.. Wherever it is that map leads.. We’re not getting there as quickly as hongjoong hoped we would.

You come to a small clearing in the woods.. Still covered with trees but space enough to make a small camp for your team of 15..

Hongjoong stops turning to face everyone.

“We’ll camp here for now” he sighs out shaking his head frustrated. He seems to have a silent conversation with seonghwa before he's speaking again “Mingi.. Jongho you both take night watch.” he says to the two men before he begins to walk off seonghwa close behind him.. Yeosang too before he adds

“We don’t know what or who lurks in this forest..”

…

The camp set up everyone seems to get settled seemingly staying in their own tents exception of jongho and mingi who pace around a makeshift border of what you call ‘camp’

Sitting watching the flames of the fire at the side of the camp.. It's quiet.. Peaceful.

“y/n..” yunho stands in front of you with a smile on his face. He outstretches his hand for you to take.

“Come with me.” he says and you look at him suspiciously.

He sighs out.. “Just come on.. Or we’ll miss it” he grabs your hand and begins to pull you away. Away from camp.. Down the path. You walk hand in hand with yunho for around 10 to 20 minutes. Until you come to another opening. This time a cliff opening. He lets go of your hand and goes and sits on the edge of the cliff sighing dejectedly

“Missed it.. It was right there my star.. I'm sorry” he says to you.

You sit next to him

“What was it?” You ask

“The lights..” he sighs

You smile

“Thank you for coming to get me because you saw them.. Don’t worry though Yun.. the stars are still very pretty to watch” you tell him. He nods still upset that he failed to get you on time.. You sit in silence for a few moments and then he turns to you.

“I'll be back quickly star.. I'll go get a blanket and my telescope and we can watch them better” he says to you and you agree and he gets up and walks back in the direction you both came from.

You sit yourself in the quiet and peaceful for a bit looking up at the stars.. Occasionally looking at the darkness of the ocean below from your viewpoint.

You hear the crunching of the ground in the distance

“Sorry I kept you y/n.. I’m back” he says and sits beside you again.

#starrywooyo #starrywooyo fics #starrywooyo treasure series #starrywooyo treasure #treasure #ateez x reader #ateez au #ateez pirate au #hongjoong x reader #seonghwa x reader #yunho x reader #yeosang x reader #san x reader #mingi x reader #wooyoung oneshot #jongho x reader #ateez series

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hyuuukais · 9 months ago

Text

.・゜-: ✧ :- FICTIONAL REALITY .・゜-: ✧ :-

pairing • bang chan x fem reader

synopsis • fiction or reality? y/n preferred the former, escaping into another world, escaping her problems. so what happens when reality takes that away from her; wiping her own story-in-progress off both her laptop and beloved usb? and what happens when she opens the door in the middle of a crisis to none other then the love interest of her novel... and he's holding her usb?

warnings • general, blood, y/n feeling guilty

MASTERLIST | PREVIOUS

CHAPTER TWENTY • EPILOGUE (3.2k)

"Hello? Is this Y/n? I got your note, aha. Cute. Maybe I'm calling a bit soon since you literally just left the shop, but I hope you get this. There's a festival going on tomorrow night for New Year's, would you be interested? Give me a shout if you are, which I really, really hope so. Talk soon?"

Twenty minutes later, you arrived home and discovered the message waiting for you. Your phone had been off vibrate, too anxious for any notifications, and you didn't think he'd call you so soon. Hand shaking with excitement, you let out a small squeal and right as you do, someone joins you on your sofa, yellow and plush.

"What's gotten into you?" Minho puts a mug of coffee down, coaster centimeters away from the photo of you both that sits in the middle of the table. "Did you finally do it?"

"Yes! And I missed his call-"

"You missed his call?"

"Shut up!" You groan, hiding your face with your hands and curling into yourself on the other side of the sofa. He gently moves your hands and you see the sad smile on his face.

"Call him back," he lets go of your hands. "Before he changes his mind."

For a moment, all you can do is stare at the man sitting across from you. "Are you happy?"

He blinks. "What?"

"Are you happy?" You repeat, but he still doesn't answer. "Here, with me? With this new life? Do you ever regret taking that letter seriously?"

"Never," Minho's reply is quick, almost cutting you off. "Y/n, I-" He takes a breath, looking away from you; you wait for him to face you again, wait for him to be ready. "I enjoy being with you, a lot. Too much. You make me comfortable."

"Why do you look so sad then?" You ask, voice soft. "Why do you make this sound like a bad thing?"

Minho looks at you in the eye, looks away, looks back. "Because you make me feel things, good things, and it scares me. It scares me so much, Y/n. The way you feel about Chan, is it scary?"

"Always," you whisper.

"Then you should understand what I'm saying."

"Min," you hold his hand, the other reaching up to cup his face. His eyes are shiny, but he blinks it away. "I'm sorry-"

"Don't apologize," he sighs and shrugs. "I'll get over you."

"Hey! Don't make it sound so easy..." He laughs and you feel more at ease watching his shoulders shake and his smile widen.

"Listen, I saw some things in that white room that made me realize a lot of stuff about myself that didn't relate back to you." He leans back on the sofa with a sigh. "I got a bit wrapped up in your disappearance that I kind of ended up disappearing myself, but now? I feel more myself than ever." Neither of you speak for a moment. "So, you gonna call him, or...?"

"Shit, right!" You get up to grab your phone from where it sits charging on a small table in the corner. "Um, I'm just gonna- I'm gonna take this in my room, okay?"

"Go for it," Minho smirks.

You nervously agreed to meet at the festival, waiting under the entrance banner for the man who unknowingly saved you, or at least, helped you save yourself. Looking down at your watch, you see he's five minutes late. No worries, it's only five minutes. But five turns into ten, fifteen, and you're about to give up and leave when a hand is waved in front of your face.

"Sorry I'm late," Chan gives you a guilty smile. "This event caused more traffic at the café than we're used to, so it was hard closing on time."

"You're open New Year's?"

"New Year's Eve, yes. New Year's Day, no. We can spend tomorrow lounging around since it'll be a late night-" he catches himself, shutting his mouth tightly for a moment. "I'm getting ahead of myself, aren't I?"

"Just a bit," you chuckle, then slowly add, "But... I like the sound of that."

"Great!" He nearly shouts but clears his throat to calm down, a huge grin painting his face. You see his dimples pop out and can't help but place a hand over his cheek, thumbing the dip softly. A blush creeps up his neck, warming his face in the cold winter air.

Thick snowflakes come down in waves, covering your hair and getting in your eyelashes. You challenge Chan to see who can catch more in their mouth, but it's hard to keep track as they melt with contact. You're so focused on the snowfall that you don't realize how close you are to each other, backs bumping and causing you to fall to the side of the pathway you were on and into a small snowbank. Chan is quick to apologize, stretching a hand out for you to grab, which you do, but instead of standing up with his help you drag him down next to you. Strangers give you looks as he falls down, snow puffing up as his body hits the pile, but you don't care, you're laughing and having fun.

"You're so beautiful," Chan says, voice loud enough for only you to hear and he gives you a soft smile. "Where have you been all my life?"

"Oh, don't do that," you jokingly cringe away, trying to hold back a laugh.

"What? Do what?" He asks seriously, sitting up on an elbow in the snow, watching you avoid his eye contact because if you look at him, you'll lose it. "Y/n! Do what? Express my love for you-"

You both freeze.

"Oh my god." Now he's the one cringing, face covered by his hands but you can still see a sliver of skin turning bright red underneath. "Pretend I didn't say that? It's just- it feels like I've already known you for so long and we've had what, three interactions?"

He looks at you and you finally sit up, feeling the snow soaking through the backs of your pants. Taking his hands in yours, you remove them from his face. Embarrassment is painted across his features, but you just smile at him because little does he know. It hurts a bit to think that he'll never know how he saved you, as cheesy as it sounds. The ways in which he helped you and gave you the courage you needed to acknowledge your past and look back with resilience instead of away in fear, tearing yourself apart without even realizing it.

"What if I said I feel the same way?" You say carefully, and the grip Chan has on your hands tightens. "Like... you've been with me the whole time, through it all."

"I-" In the background, you can hear people starting to chant down to midnight and you both stand up, brushing the snow off yourselves. "Um, I guess we should join them?"

...5

"I like it over here." There's no one around to disturb you.

...4

"It is a little more... private." He grins.

...3

"This is a pretty good way to start the new year if you ask me."

...2

Wrapping your arms around his neck, his own find your waist.

...1!

Fireworks go off as your lips connect and all the comfort and love Chan has ever shown you comes crashing down on you, almost overwhelming. You think of the first time you met, the confusion and eventual acceptance. You think of the night in the storm, the night with Minho and Jeongin-

Jeongin.

Before you can think, you pull away, thoughts plagued by images of the boy dying in your arms playing over and over again. You don't notice the way your breathing picks up or the tightness in your throat and chest until it's too late, eyes stinging and skin tingling.

"Y/n? Did- did I do something wrong?" Chan is looking you over, worry etched in his face.

"Not you- I'm sorry. I can't even explain-" But when you lock eyes, something in him breaks, you can see the dam burst in his eyes.

He gasps, a hand coming up and tangling in his hair as he steps back from you, eyebrows furrowed in what looks like pain. Dark red liquid drips from his nose and you're quick to be by his side again, cradling his face in your hands.

"Chan?" Your panic is becoming overwhelming. "Talk to me."

"I..." His face relaxes and he wipes his nose. "I remember."

"Remember what?"

"Everything."

Something about the kiss, the connection, brought his memories back and he hasn't stopped looking at you in awe since you got back to your apartment. You settled in to make sure Chan was alright, and he was, now cuddling on the sofa and trying to make sense of it all.

"I don't think I'll ever fully understand," you sigh.

"Me either," Chan strokes your hair. "And Minho, he's...?"

His voice trails off in uncertainty and you look up at him. "He's okay."

"Good, good." He breathes in, breathes out. "But Jeongin didn't make it?"

"No," you whisper, guilt holding your heart hostage. "No, he didn't."

He's holding you close and wiping the new tears, his own threatening to fall. All that goes through your head is he was just a kid, he didn't deserve that, he was just a kid. A clawing at your window breaks you out of the beginning of the spiral, sitting up with your hands caging Chan in. At your window is an orange blob pawing at the screen. You get up and walk over, opening the window to discover a kitten sitting right outside. Above its right eye is a rough patch of skin, scar tissue erasing the fur, and the tip of its tail is missing. When you pry the screen off, the kitten jumps inside your apartment.

"Hey- wait!" You spin around to see the kitten rubbing against Chan's leg, purring up a storm. "I didn't say you could come in."

You kneel down and stick a hand out. The kitten pauses what it's doing, hesitantly sniffing your outstretched hand before nudging its nose against you. You can't help but smile at the small creature, a sense of familiarity washing over you. This is the same cat you used to feed in the woods, how did it find you here?

"Guess we have a cat now?" Chan leans down and pats its backside.

"We?" You question, glancing up at him.

His face reddens. "You, sorry. I guess you have a cat now. I don't know why I said we-"

"We have a cat now," you sigh happily. "I like the sound of that better." Looking down at the cat, now uninterested in you both and snuggling up under your coffee table, you tilt your head. "Now, what should we name you?"

After a moment of thinking, Chan clears his throat. "I have an idea, but you can say no."

"What is it?"

"Jeongin?" You focus your attention on Chan, whose eyes won't leave the kitten. "Ayen for short. In memory."

Your heart aches at the suggestion and you look back to the cat under the table resting peacefully and your breath catches. Ayen.

"It's perfect."

Not a day went by where Chan didn't remind you that you were loved, whether it was a note left behind or a piece of tiramisu in the fridge with your name on it. You tried hard to reciprocate the loving actions, giving him massages after long work days or sending him off with a goodbye kiss. One day you'd broken down when he wasn't home, thinking you'll never be able to show him love like he shows you no matter how desperately you want to. He came home early that day and took you into his arms, holding you until your sobbing quieted.

"What's wrong, baby?" He whispered into your hair, hand rubbing soothing circles on your back. "Bad day?"

You expressed to him how you felt and he pulled away. The first thing you noticed was the look on his face, his eyes glassy with unshed tears. Ever since then he's made it his mission to let you know he feels just as loved as you, if not more.

Ayen has proved to be quite the troublemaker, and you're sure at this point that the boy's soul lives in the little creature. Minho visited you days after Ayen showed up, feigning anger that you hadn't told him you even planned on getting a cat when he lets you see Soonie, Doongie, and Dori for free. Eventually, he gave up the act and told you all kinds of tips and tricks for taking care of a cat, helping you with your first trip to the vet, and picking out the best cat tree for a little guy like him. Your apartment was starting to look like yours again with all the trinkets you'd started to collect and the cat toys tossed about. Living alone has never felt so good.

Bringing you to present day, sitting on your couch with a movie you've seen a million times on in the background and your laptop keeping your legs warm. Ayen rubs against your calves, ditching you when you absentmindedly reach down to pet him. The document in front of you is almost finished, the ending being the last thing to be done giving you deja vu. For the past few months, you've been working a new passion project, not one of escapism, but of hope and survival. One could almost call your writing obsessive, but you made sure to take breaks and still keep a social life with both Minho and Chan to keep you busy. You don't know what happened to Yeji and Hyunjin, but you hope they're doing well. Part of you is convinced they were created to look after you, and now that you're doing well by yourself, they're off to help another soul. You've befriended Lily through Chan and even started talking to some of Minho's friends again, getting close to Felix and Changbin.

"Still working?" Chan enters the home, slipping his shoes off and dropping his bag to the ground.

You hum in response, not taking your eyes off the document as you type and retype the same line different ways, unable to figure out the end to the boy's journey.

"Stuck on the end," you sigh when he gently takes your laptop away.

"You'll get it when it comes to you," Chan says, content you didn't try to take the device back. "Now, c'mere."

He pulls you into his chest, laying down on the couch and kissing the top of your head. You can't help but giggle, looking up at him with pure adoration on your face.

"Tell me about your day," you say, closing your eyes.

"Not much to say."

"I don't care, I like to hear you talk," you mumble. "Tell me anyway."

Laughing, he starts off with the walk to work, making sure to give every detail no matter how mundane. His voice starts to fade as he gets to lunch and you begin slipping into a state of sleep.

The boy sits across from you in what looks like an attic, the bed too small for him. His legs are crossed and he has a smile on his face as you recognize him. It's been a while since you've dreamed of Jeongin, but you suppose he senses you're in a creative rut.

"Long time, no see." Jeongin joins you on the floor. "This is gonna be the last time, actually."

"The last time?" You ask.

"Yeah, I-" he sucks in a breath. "I found them."

"You did?" You nearly shriek, grabbing Jeongin by the shoulders. "Oh my god! Oh my god, what are you still doing here?"

"Stop that!" But he's laughing as he shoves your hands off, eyes turning into crescents at your antics. "I wanted to say goodbye, didn't want to leave you wondering where I went, but you already have a piece of me with you always."

Ayen. "True. I'm really happy for you Jeongin."

"You're so mushy," he complains, but you know he doesn't really mind. "Also, stop stressing about the ending to your story. It'll happen when it happens."

"Shut up," you groan. "You and Chan should have spent more time together, really. Enough about me, when are you leaving?"

"Now, actually." Jeongin stands and helps you up, nodding toward the door. "They're out there. Once I leave, you'll probably wake up since this place won't exist anymore."

Staring at the door, a surge of emotion crashes through you and you throw your arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. "I'm gonna miss you."

"Think of it this way," he hugs you just as tightly. "I'll be living the life I was meant to and although we won't know each other anymore, I know you'll always be a piece of me too."

"Get out of here before you make me cry." You shove him away lightly, wiping your eyes before the tears can fall.

You watch as his hand slides over the doorknob, holding it for a moment before opening the door. Warm light seeps into the bedroom, hot on your skin; it feels like home. Once your eyes adjust, you can see two people in the distance with their arms beckoning Jeongin over. He smiles wide, taking that first step through with confidence, and suddenly he's not the boy you knew. A smaller boy, you're guessing around eight years old, bounds over to the figures and is wrapped up in their loving arms. With one last look at you, they take one of his hands each and begin to walk away, the door shutting slowly the further they get.

You know how to end your story when you wake up.

There's a wet patch on Chan's sweater where your face was and you know you were crying, but he's fast asleep. You're careful when you get off him, taking your laptop with you to your bedroom and opening the document labeled "Open Me! - WIP". You still weren't sure about the title, starting to furiously type before the motivation left you. It's far from perfect, but you feel that's fitting as you save it one last time, preparing to send it out for editing and feedback as you notice the orange rays of a rising sun peaking through your curtains.

"Oh, fuck," you laugh, looking at the time. "At least I'll sleep well tonight."

There's a knock on the door and Chan is walking in, a look of disapproval on his face when he notices your laptop. With a dramatized sigh, he drops down next to you, burying his face into your side as you set it aside.

"Baby, I figured out the ending," you say, barely containing your excitement.

Unlike you, he doesn't hold back, pushing himself back up and making a noise of elation.

"What? That's amazing!" He tugs you into him; another way of showing how much he loves you is never not touching you. "We need to celebrate. What about that place a few streets down you like? We can invite your other friends too and-"

You cut him off with a kiss, his lips melting into yours. When you pull away, he's not even mad at what you did. There's no feeling of anxiety with him.

"How about we stay in?" You suggest. "Just the two of us."

"That's all I need," he agrees, pressing another kiss to your forehead. "You. Only you."

●

notes • the end 🥹 thank you to everyone who read, i hope you enjoyed 💙

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