#Russian Farmer's Song

[drones-of-innocence]

Some Keane lyrics that fundamentally changed my brain chemistry

[whatami94]

"If I could eat my words, would I be standing here?

Biting my tongue and feeling so young"

-

Android girl (cross posted on twitter)

I don't know how to draw good backgrounds so I might redo it later. >.>

[camille-lachenille]

9 people you want to know better

Thanks for the tag @tar-thelien

Three ships: Farawyn, Sam/Rosie, Elwing/Eärendil (and Celrond, always Celrond)

First ship: Percabeth. I’m not into the Percy Jackson fandom anymore but they will always have a special place in my heart.

Last song: Tango with Death (English version), from The Last Trial musical

Last movie: Ratataplan, an Italian movie from the 70s’ I watched with my dad last week and I was crying with laughter the whole time.

Currently reading: War of the Twins, by Margaret Weis and Tracy Hickman

Currently watching: I don’t watch shows or series but I do watch on repeat Russian musicals so the Lay of Leithian rock opera.

Currently eating: nothing, but I just finished homemade pudding with berries

Currently craving: the mediocre lactose and gluten free ice-cream cones from the grocery store. And ham from the farmer market.

And I tag without pressure @lanthanum12 @leucisticpuffin @booksabandoned @aroace-moron @dreamingthroughthenoise @cilil @polutrope @eomerofrohan @emeraldskulblaka

[fixfoxnox]

Use this ask to ramble about anything, better if it's about Roach 🪳💖

(btw I think I found you in twitter by accident, I'm not sure, too anxious to follow anyway)

AHHHHH YESSS ROACH RAMBLE ASK MUAH MUAH (KISSES)

I haven't gotten to yell about my boy by himself in so long omggggg

Oh also before I forget, you probably did find my Twitter! I haven't really made any posts about it cause, tbh, I still have no idea what I want to post there, but I do indeed have a Twitter! It is here for anyone who wants to follow me. Right now I've just really been dropping random cod thoughts and reposting a lot of artists content, but who knows maybe I'll start doing some Twitter exclusive stuff or thread fics or something (has no idea how thread fics work). Anyways on to the boy:

I'm using this as an opportunity to just talk about whatever comes to mind and the first thing I wanna start with are like some alternate ideas I had for Roach's family before I landed on the Sanderson dynamic that I have now:

Roach from a military family

Imagine how fun it would be if Roach was raised in a military family, especially if they still had that overprotective aspect to them. Like baby boy who was raised around the military so he's been intimately familiar with it

Maybe he had some different talent and his family wanted him to go down a different path and not go military like them

He says fuck that and joins the military and fucks around and ends up joining taskforce 141

Extra funny points if his family don't realize that he's on a specialized taskforce cause he was so nervous about telling them and they find out in dramatic fashion

Maybe he drops in to save them on a mission or something like 🤭 the drama of it all I love it

Also side note but I was thinking so hard about the Sanderson boys (Johnathan and Eddie) and I can't draw so I have to snatch some Face Claims for them so this is what I think Roach's older brothers look like:

Johnathan is played by Lee Pace don't test me this man is tall and probably acts as his own security at his bar and also is a goofball and idk Lee Pace is perfect (this should not detract from me also thinking that Lee Pace is a perfect fc for König)

Eddie to me has to look something like Luke Norris idk I feel like he needs a softer and more like nervous/panicky energy than Johnathan and this man fits don't test me don't test me

Also for anyone who is wondering: No, I still don't have a face claim for my Roach. In my mind he changes so much I see so many different artists versions of Roach in my brain at all times so choosing an actor for him is so hard. I have...thoughts, but idk that anyone would enjoy the thoughts that I have so we'll pretend I don't have them.

More on Roach cause he's my lil guy, my lil dude, my lil buddy

Listen y'all know Southern Roach is my bias but also also also have been falling in love more and more with the idea of Russian Roach. He would be so funnn like he works with Nik beforehand maybe he was undercover with the ultranationalists. I also enjoy the idea of him cursing Shepherd and/or Makarov out in Russian I think it would be fun.

However Southern Roach rains supreme I was thinking so hard about a ghostroachsoap au recently based loosely on the song "Farmer's Daughter" by Rodney Atkins. (Y'all let me know if you want the full au its really just farm au cuteness)

Thinking so hard of Roach just being beloved in his small town as this Golden Child precious little dude then he goes off to the military and finally let's that feral side come out a little. Imagine how funny it would be for Ghost and Soap to go home with Roach and see their boyfriend pu on this innocent act and listen to people describe him as this perfect little guy when they know for a fact that Roach is like borderline feral two steps away from being considered a wild animal.

"He's such a good boy, would never hurt a fly."

Ghost and Soap who watched Roach tear a man's throat out with his teeth last week:

Also taking the opportunity to say that we as a community need to start acknowledging hoe canonically skilled Roach is with weapons! Like this is a boy who had both Price and Soap cursing because they couldn't get any kills because he was killing them to fast. This is a boy who beat Ghost (his luitenant) on a rifle test by a wide margin and on the test that ghost beat him he only fell behind four points.

Roach canonical has several extremely brutal takedown moves that he can do, including the pickaxes and the little fucking kick thing he does to the one guy before stabbing him. Also he's like straight up flipping his guns and doing tricks with them and shit in his weapons inspections, Soap talks about how good he is with C4 and shit.

Like I think people see the like spots where he got into trouble and nearly died in the campaign and take that to mean that he's like not as good as Ghost and Soap and needed their help a lot but like honest to God all of the trouble he gets in to is less because he fucked up and more because the world seems to have it out for him.

The roof breaking out from under him, the ice cracking on him, explosions happen to rock his ass just as soon as he hits an open field. Like someone was trying to kill this little fuck and two outta the three times they failed.

And like its not like Roach doesn't help himself during these situations. Like when he fell yeah he had Soap guiding him but he was the one having the run and slide and do all that shit like no amount of Soap's guiding could have made that easy for him.

Also this boy almost falls off a cliff but is able to get himself back on track enough that he not only finishes climbing the cliff but then does a whole ass stealth mission basically invading a Russian military base on his own???

Roach is a very talented and skilled bug and we should all be patting him on the head for how cool he is.

Also I think its absolutely funny cause In my mind he's smaller than Soap and Ghost both like height and build wise (not small, just smaller than those two behemoths) and so when the trio of them are together people like tend to underestimate him meanwhile Ghost and Soap are like "Uh, no, no you uh hey dude no" because they know that Roach will gladly fuck people up.

I also love the idea of Roach appearing out of nowhere like a fucking cryptid. There is no talking behind Roach's back or keeping secrets he is everywhere at once and will appear out of thin air. Ghost and Soap have to like fully leave base if they want to plan a surprise for him and even then both of them have no trust that Roach won't somehow pop into existence next to them waahahhahaha

Alright thats all for my rambling for now

[fuck-the-gender]

Mama ŠČ!: whatever could it mean?

i'm not really your eurovision girlie BUT! this year few songs captured my attention. to nobody's surprise, one of them is mama ŠČ! by let 3. this beautiful performance is so packed that at first watch it just looks like a nonsensical chaos so it's time for some good ol' analysis!

!DISCLAIMER! I AM NOT CROATIAN AND I DIDN'T TALK TO THE BAND. EVERYTHING HERE ARE JUST MY THOUGHTS

1. The band

what even is let 3? well, the word 'let' translates to 'flight' and i didn't dig deeper. sorry. the band itself is more interesting anyway.

they are a croatian rock band formed in 1987 in then-yugoslavia. since then they released ten albums and have become quite popular in croatia and other countries on balkan. they are mostly known for their controversial, avantgarde, vulgar and obscene performances. the eurovision one is tame for them. seriously, read their wiki, it's great.

2. The title

on to the song itself now! let's begin with the name. 'mama šč'. what? right of the bat we are intrigued. what the hell is 'šč'? one meaning could be щ. this is a letter of cyrillic script, which is used in russia, ukraine, bulgaria and some other countries. 'šč' is this letter written in latin script according to the ukrainian pronunciation, which is a nice little tidbit i learned from wikipedia. i also learned that the band itself provided non-sensical answers when asked about the meaning, but as they say, it may not be that deep, but the ground is soft and i'm ready to start digging. also also, the phrase 'šč!' is kind of a post-pandemic catchphrase for the band, with its origin being a video of the band's bassist balancing a shoe on his head.

now, 'mama'. the word itself is not difficult to understand, but it also has a symbolic meaning. you see, the title of 'mother' is often assigned to russia. this started in the medieval times, but was popularized and extensively used during the soviet era by the bolsheviks. this imagery, along with the theory of panslavism, was and sometimes still is used to support russia's role as the superior slavic country, which should take other slavs 'under it's wings'. it's also a term of endearment, which has become quite bitter

with this knowledge i think we can confidently say that the name of the song could refer to russia, with its imperial tendencies, and ukraine. i know, how shocking, i bet you wouldn't guess that.

3. The lyrics

we're finally really getting into it! the first three verses go like this:

Mama kupila traktora ŠČ! Mama kupila traktora ŠČ! Mama kupila traktora Trajna-nina Armagedon nona ŠČ!

'mama kupila traktora' translates to 'mommy's bought herself a tractor'. we already established the relationship between russia and the word, so let's assume that by 'mama' the song means the country.

so she's bought herself a tractor. good for her! except the tractor could be a metaphor, too. you see, one of the most popular brands of tractors in croatia is belarus produced in, you guessed it, belarus. so when the band sings 'mama's bought herself a tractor', they are also singing 'russia's bought itself belarus'. the words are somewhat ironic, since belarus' prezident has in october given russia's prezident a fucking tractor for his birthday, so he didn't even have to pay for it. also also, just a cherry on top, remember what ukrainian farmers used to tow russian armed vehicles? tractors.

if we take a more literal look at these lyrics, we get a picture of 'mama' buying a tool to help her and her family with farming. by the way, do you know who is one of the biggest producers of wheat inthe world? russia.

the next line is a little bit more complicated for non-croatians, but i have something. according to a comment under this video, 'trajna nina nena' is a popular croatian lullaby. so they swapped the 'nena' with 'armagedonona', which turned the meaning to an 'armageddon lullaby'. also, 'nena' means 'grandma' in croatian and i have seen people translate this line as 'armageddon grandma', which could allude to the soviet union, if we take russia today as the 'mother'. granny end-of-the-world kinda thing.

on to the next verse!

Mama ljubila morona ŠČ! Mama ljubila morona ŠČ! Mama ljubila morona Trajna-nina Armagedon nona

it's pretty similar to the first two, but the key line is different. 'mama ljubila morona' translates to 'mama kissed the moron'. who could it be, i wonder. combined with the previous verses, we get the picture of 'mama' buying 'tractor' for her 'moron' whom she loves. by the way this scenario is presented it's clear that the band doesn't agree with 'mama' or the 'moron', but it also could be read as russia and its people being in a sort of abusive or toxic relationship with the 'moron', as he is the one who's being referred to with unflattering term.

both verses are broken up with the 'šč' sounds. Here i will take the liberty to paste the lead singer's answer regarding this letter:

“5000 years older than the first alphabet found, it is the oldest letter. Now we will send our alphabet from Dora into orbit by spaceship. When Armageddon on Earth subsides, the rocket will return and bring the first alphabet again.”

Take from that what you will.

next we have something i would dare to call the bridge:

A b c č ć d dž đ e f g h i j k l lj m n nj o p r s š t u v z ž Mama, mama, mama, ja se idem igrat’ Mama, idem u rat

first, let's look at the alphabet. here i will again draw from the comment section of the previously aforementioned video. according to one comment, the nonsensical spelling is supposed to symbolize the creation of a 'new soviet union', represented by the 'šč'. they also mention that the 'šč' could be a parody of the letter z, which you can see on russian tanks deployed in ukraine. but i also saw a comment under a reddit post saying that it's just a croatian alphabet.

here i think is a good place to point out the origins of this song. you see, mama ŠČ! wasn't written for eurovision. it's actually part of a bigger project, an anti-war rock opera, and was inspired by another croatian artist, who wrote songs for croatian production of the play 'mother courage and her children', specifically by the lyrics 'buy me, mama, one little war'.

'ja se idem igrať' translates to 'i'm goin to play' and 'idem u rat' to 'i'm going to war'. this sounds like it is sung by a child, as well as all of the song up to this point, with the use of nursery rhyme and the childish word 'mama'. but here, the atmosphere of the song changes, it becomes more chaotic and aggressive. the child is excited to go play, to go to war. if we look at dictators, majority of them were recruiting children through insane amounts of propaganda. many of those kids actually were excited to go kill. or it's possible, that the child in the song is not a child at all, but rather a childish dictator, who sees war as play. this would be inline with the band's statement, in which they addressed the song to 'all those, who think that planet is their toy'.

whoosh, that's a lot! but we're almost there:

Onaj mali psihopat Mali podli psihopat Krokodilski psihopat Mama, idem u rat

'that little psychopat, little evil psychopat, crocodile-like psychopat, mama, i'm going to war'.

well who could they possibly mean by that. fun fact, that gentleman-sitting-over-there (as our geography teacher refers to him, while pointing at moscow) is noticeably short.

the 'crocodile-like' part could refer to few things. firstly, boris johnson said that talking to russia's prezident about peace is like 'talking to a crocodile while it has your leg in its jaws'. another one is 'crocodile tears', which could be connected to the image of eager children going to war in the bridge and how the dictator cries crocodile tears over them when they die. and lastly, 'krokodil' is a street name of the drug desomorphine, also called 'russian magic' or 'poor man's heroin'. this drug is quite popular in russia and it's, well, not good. so yeah, they could be calling the dictator a psycho on drugs.

one thing to note, however, is that this chorus is really angry and is sung by a dude dressed like stalin. one way that leaders justify their occupation efforts is by questioning the competency of the other nation's leaders. we see it in ukraine, how russia claims to be 'liberating it' from a 'fascist regime'. if we go with the interpretation that the song is sung by a dictator, then we get a picture of him singing those words about the leader of the country that he's trying to conquer, while to us viewers it seems that he's singing defacto about himself. it's a double edged sword.

so if we put it all together, it's a song inspired by nursery rhymes and the play 'mother courage', through another artist, about a child, or a childish dictator going to war. numerous lyrics point at russia, but some things are still vague enough that it could be applied to any bloodthirsty, war-hungry dictator. but this piece is not only a song, it's a performance.

4. The visuals

first, the costumes!

beautiful, isn't it? these costumes symbolize the four riders of apocalypse ('glad' - hunger, 'rat' - war, 'smrt' - death and 'kuga' - the plague), however, they added a fifth one, HDZ, which is a croatian political party, who is supposedly 'corrupt as hell'. the prime minister from this party was arrested for corruption, so i'm inclined to believe it.

when i was showing the clip to my mom, she stopped it here, looked at me and said 'that's stalin'. it's actually kind of scary, how much it looks like those stalin-cult-propaganda posters.

few things about this.

the performer in the background is croatian drag queen jovanka broz tituka. her name is a pun on jovanka broz, probably the most famous yugoslavia's first lady, and the word for prostitute. she is featured even more in the videoklip, it's great.

the composition of the projection is very similar to the typical composition for soviet propaganda posters. they use this format in the videoklip, too

and the moves of the dancer are literally military march. so they took the things that soviet union is recognized for (propaganda and military power) and made them into a perfect parody performed by a drag queen. it's mocking in the best way possible, because queer people are heavily persecuted in russia, so here their symbols of power are made into a laughing stock by a member of the very group they hate. it feels like a resistance, like a reclamation.

it wouldn't be let 3 if they didn't perform in drag. the mocking-military theme continues, since they are wearing uniforms painted and tailored to look like dresses.

but who's that guy in black? he's actually not a member of the band. he's another croatian artist, žanil tataj žak. this is not his first time doing a collaboration with the band. he looks like some kind of evil wizard, with how he creeps in from behind with missiles and then stands behind the band

just look at that dude. the word on his forehead is 'njinle'. it's written in šatrovački, which is an argot developed by some subcultures in yugoslavia and was used as a device of secret communication. when you switch the letters, you get 'lenjin'. so yeah, a crazy evil wizard.

the missiles are quite self-explenatory, we all know what that gentleman has in his military arsenal. here, however, i don't feel like they are portrayed like a thread, but rather like another mockery. i think this screenshot summarizes my thoughts on them pretty well

also this is possibly my favorite thing ever: five dudes marching in a drag costumes of military uniforms, singing the 'psychopat' chorus. it's a mockery, beautiful and gorgeous mockery of military might and war.

and the whole performance is finished by the band striping down to their undies while in the back a giant projection of jovanka dances among their flying heads. what a ride. i've read somewhere that the faces on their undershirts are young them, but it could be wrong. and of course the saluting. the final nail in the coffin of dictatorship's dignity.

i love this piece of art. it's ridiculous, because that's what it's meant to be, because it wants you to look at this caricature of power and military might and realize how stupid and pointless it is. it made people angry, but it was supposed to do that, because it's a satire and good satire always angers those who feel threatened by it.

10/10

(here and here are the videos, here's some article)

[superblycaffeinated]

Year One: At Home In the Dark masterlist

warnings for series: mentions of alcohol/being drunk, mentions of violence/blood imagery (with warnings for specific chapters), mentions of anxiety and depression symptoms (with warnings for specific chapters), swearing - please do not read if you may find any of this triggering and take care of yourself.

“The proverbial saying ‘All’s fair in love and war’ expresses the idea that, like war, where any strategy is accepted, affairs of the heart are also no-holds-barred contests.”

Chapter One:

“Your mission, should you choose to accept is-“

Groans fill the room and Rebecca Baxter rolls her eyes at everyone. An amber bottle pressed to her lips as she nudges his shoulder. A silent, ‘Can you believe them? They’re absolutely no fun.’

Zachary Goode snickers into his own beer, a silent response of ‘No, you’re just overly dramatic as usual and Cam has probably had too many glasses of wine for this.’

“Alright, alright, fine.” Bex waves her hands and to look at him fully. “Truth or Dare? Clock’s ticking Goode.”

Maybe it’s the way he hasn’t felt this light in a long time - maybe ever, that they’re all together again for it too. Summer evening wind blows at his hair that’s gotten a little too long. From their spot on the porch, he can hear the hum of crickets and cicadas, smell the familiar scent of leaves that are ready to turn for Autumn in the air. He doesn’t even have shoes on, he can’t remember the last time he didn’t feel the need to be ready to go. Or it could be the way his heart does this funny thing of swelling and aching in the same beat when Cam blows hair off of her cheek, giggling like she’s eighteen again as Liz pours more wine.

Or maybe he’s just drunk.

“Truth.”

Yeah, definitely just drunk.

The entire circle falls silent, cups and bottles half suspended to parted lips, laughter trails off as eyes widen. Every single one of them can hear each other’s heartbeats, the distinct ping of water from the faucet hitting ceramic inside and down the hall, and the ticking of the clock just inside the dining room.

Cammie sits up straighter, wiping at her lips. “What?”

Bex sits back against the porch column hard. Liz props up on her knees - clearly criss cross applesauce is too child’s play for what’s at stake here. Macey narrows her eyes at him from her spot on the couch above the other two girls as she tosses back the rest of her wine. Even Preston and Jonas look at him with furrows forming above their brows.

Jesus, they’re all so dramatic.

He rolls his eyes and turns to Bex. “You gonna ask me the question or not?”

“But you, you never pick-“ she looks around the group and he marks the date in his calendar. Rebecca Baxter has been rendered speechless and actually physically appears frazzled as she drums her fingers on her knees and looks at the stars. “I mean, what do I ask? I never thought I’d actually get the chance.”

Cammie narrows her eyes and points at him, “Ask him where he hid the M&M’s because I know he did.”

Zach grins, blowing her a kiss that she rolls her eyes at but smiles into her wine glass because of nonetheless.

Bex waves off the suggestion, not serious enough of course. She snaps her fingers and Macey moves to the edge of the couch cushion. “Oh! Private jet and the Russians!”

Bex counters, “Finland, embassy with the Duchess?”

Cammie laughs, “Idaho, potato farmer?”

Jonas shakes his head. “Nah, don’t waste it on that one, I have pictures.”

Zach makes a mental note about finding and deleting those, beginning to hum the jeopardy theme song. He’s definitely drunk, because he should have been noticing the one girl who was far too silent. He should have known that when Elizabeth Sutton is quiet, that means she’s thinking big things.

“What about when he fell in love with Cammie?” The question is calculated, lazy almost in her tone, but it catches him off guard and Liz is far to perceptive to let it slip. His eyes widened, pupils dilating. His breath changed just so, stuck in his throat. His heart rate increased. Damn stupid beer he was never drinking ever again.

The two men opposite him groan at the suggestion and the four women turn on him. Hawk eyes, lioness’ stalking their prey. He was done for the minute the question was suggested. He has one of two options as he sees it now. Lie his ass off to the room of people who know all of his tells or plead with the love of his life.

Zach shakes his head, staring directly at Cammie. “Cammie, no, please don’t make me talk about this in front of everyone? You hate attention, it’s complicated and-“

She hums into her wine glass interrupting him, “I dunno, Zach, I think high school Cammie really needs some answers. You messed with her head quite a bit.”

Shit, bad move. Should have lied right away - ‘I loved Cammie the minute I laid eyes on her in that DC mall. Truly love at first sight, I just had to figure out who that Gallagher Girl really was’ is not gonna cut it now, they’re far too hungry for juicy gossip like they’re back in school.

“We’re married!” He holds up his left hand to prove the point, grasping at anything to make this all go away. Zach gestures out the entrance of the porch, “Our children are asleep down the hall!”

Cam only levels him with a look he’s grown to know very well. It’s the look she gives the kids when they lie and say they brushed their teeth before bed. He’s busted.

Liz stands, the girl closing in on him until his back hits the porch railing. She nudges his chest as she speaks so threateningly for someone with ducks all over their pajama’s. “Spill, or I get the truth serum.”

“You know, I forget that you’re the scariest one of the bunch sometimes Lizzie,” he gulps as Jonas cackles from his spot on the ground.

The four girls simply raise their eyebrows, and he admits defeat. His hands lift to the air beside his head. “Okay, okay, but I need another beer for this.”

Giddy with their victory, everyone settles into comfortable positions, eager to not let him get away with anything but a good and long story.

Zach avoids the creak of the floorboard as he heads into the kitchen, listening intently for the sounds of his children stirring at all. His hip hits the fridge closed in just the right spot, pulling the opener from it’s drawer.

He looks at the fridge as he leans against the counter, a picture of him and Cam in front of Gallagher on the day of Rachel and Joe’s wedding held up by a hand painted magnet. Red splotchy paint covering the words ‘World’s Best Dad’ glazed and shiny from a kiln. It’s not that he doesn’t know when he fell in love with her, he does, it’s just not so simple.

The bottle cap pops off with a hiss, then a click of it hitting the counter. He watches the green metal spin, slowing as it gets closer to meeting the flat surface of the countertop.

“Goode!”

Zach snatches the copper coin he’d been spinning against the tabletop before it flattens and stands, hands held into fists behind his back at attention.

An armed guard with flushed cheeks and a forehead dappled with sweat marches towards him.

Oh swell, it’s Jeff.

At Blackthorne, any guard calling your name in that tone isn’t gonna be great, but Jeff has this way of spitting when he talks, of not realizing what the words personal space mean, and probably has never ever heard of breath mints and their miraculous powers to ward off coffee breath.

Zach’s fingers fiddle with the coin behind his back. He’s getting better about the whole restless energy and showing it thing, but he figures it’s not dire circumstances to be on his game right now. His mind wanders through the possibilities of what today could be about. One of his bedsheet corners wasn’t tight enough, someone found the little yellow package of chocolaty goodness in his sock, or perhaps Jeff didn’t get his coffee and donut this morning and he just feels like picking on someone.

The cafeteria grows more silent as everyone decides that the show that’s about to go down has got to be better than eating the mystery meat on their trays.

“Sir?” Zach questions, staring at the spot just above Jeff’s left ear. A thing Jeff positively hates, causing him to continuously look over his shoulder and wonder what the hell Zach is staring at - but a thing that fills Zach with a small amount of joy.

It’s the little things.

Jeff does just this, head whipping around so fast he’s surprised the man doesn’t give himself whiplash. Jeff’s gaze darts across the wall and back to Zach. Beady, narrowed eyes meet his, Zach’s lips twitch slightly, revealing too much - another thing he’s still working on. But Jeff is fairly harmless and hasn’t quite mastered the art of interpreting Zach’s smaller tells.

“Visitors,” Jeff snarls and Zach’s shoulders fall.

Fuck.

The room grows even more silent, the quiet din of metal silverware hitting their trays and cups hitting wood vanish completely now as the unmistakable red head of hair floats through the cafeteria towards him. Shoulders straighten, voices cease, and breaths are held with each click then clack of black pumps against the concrete floors.

His mother is here, and she’s brought friends.

“Hello darling, miss me?”

Catherine Goode commands attention, she just does. A room full of hormone crazed teenage boys was already going to be acutely aware of a woman wearing a black dress accentuating her curves walking amongst them, they were already going to stare, Zach knows this. But Catherine has something else, the strong voice of a soldier mixed with a soft femininity enveloping each word she speaks, making you think each word is somehow meant only for you. A perfect way to get what she wants that he’s seen in action enough times to know she’s mastered skillfully. Her loss ratio is zero, she has the control every time.

For everyone except her son.

“Can’t say that I have, Cat.” Zach presses the coin between his thumb and forefinger, the indent of Abraham Lincoln surely going to be preserved in his fingerprint forever. He knows it’s a shot in the dark. Sometimes she’s pleasantly surprised by his resistance, dare he say almost impressed. But most times, it ends poorly for him.

Catherine Goode’s eyes - his eyes - narrow, her playfulness disappearing with an art that Houdini would envy. “That’s no way to talk to your mother, Zachary. Let’s go. I have people I need to introduce you to and we have something important to discuss.”

She gestures to the men behind her as she speaks, before stepping closer. Her head dips - like a snake ready to attack. He visualizes it perfectly before it happens, a hand wraps around his bicep, squeezing. Not in a loving, motherly way, but in a warning - strike one. Her voice lowers as she hisses, “Behave,” while fingernails dig into his skin leaving small crescent moons. The snake is playing with it’s food before it tightens it’s coil and removes his oxygen.

“Yes, ma’am.” He grinds his teeth, jaw clenching as the toes of his boots tap together when he straightens to formal attention again.

She smiles, satisfied with his submission and pats his cheek a little too harshly before turning on her heels and clicking away. Her fingers curl behind her head as she walks. “Gentleman.” Then they waggle out to the faces of the cafeteria in a wave, “Boys.”

He hates that he ducks his head, that he follows her blindly. His gut twists as he counts the cracks in the concrete he already knows the number of, knowing that if he were to lift his head, his classmates - if you can even call them that - would be looking at him with eyes full of pity. Sometimes he envies the ones who have nothing, it has to be better than her. But then, it’s like she knows he’ll have a thought like this. She’ll do something almost nice, she’ll make him feel guilty. How dare he wish he didn’t have her, there were good times once upon a time right?

He shakes his head, no, this is what she wants. He simply follows, choosing to hold his chin up in defiance of any pity that he can feel hitting the back of his uniform as he walks out of the cafeteria.

The men she’s brought follow closely behind her. Suits. Not terribly expensive, they’re not big deals. One is slightly taller, a thick brown mustache. This man watches his mother with sharp blue eyes, he’s not fully under her spell it would seem. As Catherine smiles and gestures into a door, the man nods and enters. The slightly younger and shorter one gestures for Zach to enter first. He’s blonde, strong shoulders, with brown eyes that look at Zach in a way that makes him feel like he’s under a microscope. This man closes the door and stands in front of it and Zach would bet his next few meals that he was Secret Service.

Mustache man sits with a groan loudly in a chair as his mother leans up against a low bookshelf. A fairly empty classroom that wasn’t used much these days. While the weather was nice, it was strictly outside for use of the range, running drills, and perimeter and mountain trail runs. Classroom time was for the bitterly cold days that even the teachers and guards knew wasn’t worth making the boys get frostbite over. Catherine fiddles with a cup of pencils, a finger swiping over the top of the shelf and leaving a streak of clean wood in its wake as her mouth pinches in disgust.

Lovely place you send me to school, huh, mom?

“Well, Zach,” mustache man’s voice is gravely, it leads Zach to believe the man used to smoke. The fact mingles with the face in his brain, a connection trying to surface to the forefront of it. Mustache man continues while holding his hand up at a height not too tall, “You’ve grown! You weren’t more than ye high last time I saw you I think.”

Zach’s always hated this greeting. What was a person supposed to say back to that? Thank you? That’s how time and puberty works? That’s what happens when you get three meals a day and stop wondering when the next one will be?

He mashes his lips together in a thin smile with a nod. He’s pretty sure that was a better move than opening it and saying any of that.

The man looks to Secret Service man and then his mother before giving another nod. “Right, well, you must be wondering what we’re here for.”

No, I love being humiliated by my mother in front of groups of people and then following her and two strangers into a dusty classroom to sit in silence, dude. I live for it, it’s my shit.

Again, not saying that, so he remains silent. Mustache man claps his hands together, looking to his mother for further instruction so it would seem. She smiles at Zach, her salesman one - the one he knows she pulls out when she really wants her way.

“Darling, these men, they have a proposition for you. A mission.”

He stands up a little straighter, unable to help himself at the word mission. A real mission? Involving his mother? The men furrow their brows slightly as Catherine continues and his apprehension and curiosity fight bay-blades style in his head - whirling around and knocking edges, unsure of who’s going to pull out in the lead just yet.

“They need some information. Some information that they think only you may be able to get for them.”

Zach waits, knowing his mother is just getting started. She’s setting a trap, complimenting him, loosening some stones in his closed off exterior, weakening it until it’s ready for a final strike. He rolls the grooved edge of the coin between his thumb and forefinger.

Catherine walks along the wall, her hands clasped behind her back. Her heels click against the tile, gaze lost on the tattered map hung on the wall. She leans in, feigning inspection as she speaks again. Her tone somehow lazy but dripping with an authoritative quality that when combined, made you lean in and feel the need to listen carefully. “As you’ve most likely come to know in your training, it’s important, in some missions, to get close to a subject. To have a relationship with them, to make them an asset.”

The mustached man cut in, “An asset is-“

“A person within organizations who provide information to outside sources. Yeah, I know.”

“Zachary.”

Warning number two, he won’t be given a third.

Silence fills the room again at her sharp use of his name. Zach’s head bows and the other two men focus on her - it’s her happy place, he knows this. She controls the room, two grown men with their entire attention fully on her and her son’s submission, she’d bask in it like it was the sun on the beach for hours if she had the time.

Zach begins to flip the coin, impatient for the details of how this all affects him, what exactly it is he’s being asked here. He watches the coin arc in the air and land in his hand several times, waiting for her big finish.

Her slender and skilled fingers intercept the coin on his next toss. Her green eyes hold his and this time, even he can’t deny them as she delivers his very first official mission.

“We need you to get some information from Joe.”

[neworderscans]

Bernard Sumner: Cash For Questions, Q Magazine 1999 (article in text below:)

Cash 4 Questions with Barney By David Quantick

© 1999 Q

He is half of Electronic, a quarter of New Order and isn’t he a naughty fellow! You blamed him for Keith Allen and asked him about as many drugs as there are drugs. In return, he denied ever having "touched himself". Meet the people Bernard Sumner.

Bernard Sumner is looking rather well. In rude health, even. This may be because Bernard Sumner has stopped eating pasties, but it’s more likely because the night before Manchester United won a football match against some Germans.

In a West London hotel, the only non-purple star called Barney lounges on a well-stuffed sofa nursing a half-bottle of Chardonnay. In spite of his numerous 43 years -20 of them spent as a member of Joy Division, New Order, Electronic, and, if you want to be pedantic, Englandneworder, the short-lived rock/footie conglomeration that brought you the rapping of John Barnes - he appears younger than he has any right to.

Moreover - bucking his Mr Miseryguts reputation - Summer appears delighted to answer even the readers’ ugliest questions. Some of his replies maybe tongue-in-cheek, and some are, frankly, lies. He may, charmingly, have faith in the beauty of moustaches, he may be eerily loath to reveal the secret of his morphing surname, but the former Bernard Dicken is proving an amenable chap. Just don’t call him Warsaw, that’s all.

Q opens the ceremonial geography project folder of questions, Sumner sips his Chardonnay and off we go.

Words David Quantick

Is True Faith about ecstasy? Trisha Farmer. Hull No. It’s about drug dependency. I don’t touch smack but when I wrote that song I tried to imagine what it’s like to be a smackhead and nothing else matters to you except that day’s hit. There’s a line in the song, “When I was a very young boy, very young boys played with me/Now we’ve grown up together, they’re afraid of what they see." The original was, “Now they’re taking drugs with me,” but Stephen Hague our producer made us change it because he said it wouldn’t be a hit if we kept that line in. He was right. It was a very big hit, but we chickened out. I change it back sometimes live.

Given your chemically excessive past, what is your parental advice to your kids concerning drugs? Anthony Clifford, Taunton Don’t go anywhere near heroin or crack or acid. Taking ecstasy’s like Russian roulette, except you've got 99,000 bullets that are empty and one that’s loaded. I don’t know anyone who’s taken cocaine where it hasn’t become a friend for life. Although you can say the same for cigarettes. I don’t smoke marijuana, but if you’re going to take a drug, that’s the best one. It’s not as bad for you as alcohol and it makes people mellow and friendly, Unfortunately, it just makes me go to sleep.

Do you still have a receiver in your head? Noel Edmunds, via e-mail I think I know what this is about. I think I came out in an interview with some bullshit answer to a question about howl wrote music. I said that I had a television aerial in my head and it picked ideas out ofthe ether and I used to work at night when everyone was asleep. Maybe I did write in a different way in those days. I think now I’ve not got that many problems in my life, I want to write songs about the ones I have got, rather than that kind of... dreamscape. I used to be pretty sort of dreamy and go off on one. I still can do it. I sat in my room for twelve hours just not watching television or anything, just thinking.

What made you piss yourself on Every Little Counts? Jamie BIundell, Rednal The words were so bad, basically (“I think you are a pig/You should be in a zoo”). We kept it on because it was better than the original lyric.

What’s your excuse for having a moustache when you were Warsaw? Ursula Stevenson, Reading It’s a popular misconception that we were called Warsaw. We were never called Warsaw. At our first concert we changed it to Joy Division (He is reminded of the question) The moustach? I’d forgotten all about that. In those days moustaches were really big. The thing I was embarrassed about was it was a bumlluff moustache that didn’t quite join in the middle. Bit like Noel’s eyebrows. No, the opposite of Noel’s eyebrows. It looked like I had Noel’s eyebrows on my lip. I’ll stand by my moustache. If you look at most pop stars, you’ll find some kind of styling error in their past history.

When joy Division started, why did you keep changing your surname, from Dicken to Albrecht to Sumner? Dove Clarke, Salford Family reasons. I’d rather not go into it.

Ian Curtis, 1999 - what would he be up to? Matt Palmer, Worcestershire It’s hard to imagine because Ian was very ill. I can’t imagine him in the ‘90s. He once threatened to go off and leave the group and buy a corner shop in Bournemouth. It was an off-licence that sold books as well, I think that was his idea. These mad, completely illogical thoughts used to come into his head from time to time. So maybe eventually he would have done that. I think he would have been a writer, because he was always reading books and he was always writing anyway. Or maybe he would have retired a millionaire by now, who knows? Silly sod.

Is it true that Touched By The Hand Of God is about whacking off Aidan Vaziri, San Francisco (Long pause followed by wide-eyed response) What’s whacking off mean? (It is explained to him) I would not write a song about masturbating, No, it’s not, most definitely isn’t. And I've never done that in my life ever. Ever. Do people really do that? Masturbate? Do you masturbate? I’ve never done it ever in my life. I’ve certainly never written a song about it. (Confidentially) It’s about bestiality, actually.

Do you regret doing that Prozac documentary? Wasn’t it a rather strange thing to do? Damon Williams, Bromley I regret it but not bitterly. It was interesting tak-ing Prozac because I don’t really suffer from depression but I can be a melancholic sort of person. It was interesting being a different person for seven months. It really agreed with me. I still think it’s a very, very interesting drug. I found when I took it if I had problems, then instead of me crumbling before my problems, I would deal with the problems.

Quote a lyric from the second Electronic album that isn’t from the single, Forbidden City. William Haas, Winchester Um... I honestly can’t be bothered. You tell me. What a trainspotter. All right, here’s one: “Misguided youth/You mix some juice with alcohol." It’s from Liquor.

Finish the sentence, in less than 10 words, “Manchester is great because..." Carl Hedges, Liverpool We’ve got the best football team, we've got the best bands, we’ve got the best gang violence scene anywhere in Britain, It’s always sunny there, it never rains...

You and Michael jackson are the only pop stars who whoop. Discuss. Heather Thompson, London NB Ha ha ha! Well, I get excited. Whoopings a primeval expression of enjoyment, and sometimes if I’m getting into a vocal take, I just get into it. If I’m at a club, I like whistling... I was at a club in Bath and this girl got a bouncer over to stop me (demonstrates incredibly powerful, piercing whistle). I don’t get excited very often but when I do, I get really excited. I’ll stop doing it now, I’ll get self-conscious about it.

When did you last touch Pernod? Steve Heath, Keighley Um... Well, Pernod’s been replaced by Absinthe. There’s this whole ritual where you bake some up on a spoon, a bit like freebasing. That stuff’s like rocket fuel, I had a couple of nights with Alex James out of Blur, a couple of disastrous nights drinking Absinthe, and I don’t even remember drinking it.

Have you ever been down to your last dollar and how did you cope? Adrian Gibbon, Bassetbury Balloons Party Shop, High Wycombe It was on New Order’s first US tour and I didn’t really get the idea of tipping - I’m a bit of a tight bastard and I find the whole idea of tipping abhorrent. We bought a beer in a club and it was 75 cents, So I thought, well, you’ve got to tip here or they'll go fucking mad. I only had a dollar, I didn’t have any more money so I him the dollar and said, Keep the change, and he went, "You fucking Manc bastard," and threw the 25 cents at me.

Do you own a Sainsbury’s reward card? Jill Cash, Amersham I do, but it’s mysteriously gone missing. I probably left it in the toilet somewhere. I keep losing odd credit cards,,, It didn’t have many points on it because I cashed it. I have a special platinum reward card. You get more points than other people, being a celebrity and that.

I saw you purchase a tuna sandwich from Spinks in Wilmslow. It was a cold day - why didn’t you buy a pasty like me? Were you trying to be hard? Andy Parr, Maclesfield Ha ha ha! I’m trying to lose a bit of weight, that’s why! Tuna's much more healthy for you and I'm trying to go on a health kick. I can’t eat pasties any more without affecting my, ah, already fragile waistline.

What’s the most unusual place you’ve had sex? Polly Winterton, London W12 I couldn’t possibly tell you without offending someone. Um... ah... I might get in trouble. I'm trying to think of which particular unusual place out of all the unusual places...

Don’t you feel ashamed for having started Keith Allen out in his pop career? K Allen (thankfully no relation), Bromley Heh heh heh! K. Allen? Um... em... I think Keith’s made a wonderful contribution to pop. I think the Fat Les records are some of the all-time classic songs that’ll go down as... ‘90's classics. I’m very proud of Keith’s contribution to pop music and I’m sure that every time there’s some kind of football event to cash in on... er! help to promote I’m sure Keith’ll be there with one of his wonderful renditions.

What’s your best Shaun Ryder story? Jane Smith, Liverpool Which one? I’ve got about three. He went out in his car to score and he crashed into a vicar in a Lada. He had 500 quid in his pocket and he said to the vicar, "Look, mate, your car’s not worth 500 quid, I’ll give you this ifyou don’t call the cops." He was a vicar and he wouldn’t take it, so Shaun said, "Well, fuck off then," and got in his car and drove off. About ten minutes later, the police knocked at his house and he said, how did you find me so quick? And they just showed him his number plate. He’d left his number plate at the scene of the crime. What else? There’s a few disgusting ones...

Did you really do a version of Blue Monday for a Sunkist ad? If so, how did the lyrics go? Peter Rees, Shrewsbury (Recites) "How does it feel/When you’re drinking in the sun? Something something something/Sunkist is the one/How does it feel/When you’re drinking in the sun/All you’ve got to believe/Is Sunkist is the one" I didn’t write them. We got offered £100,000 to do it. I kept laughing when I was singing it, so Hooky (Peter Hook, New Order bassist) got a piece card and wrote “£100,000” on it, held it up, and I sang it perfectly. But then Rob Gretton (New Order’s late manager) turned up and put the kibosh on it. There’s a remix of Blue Monday by Steve “Silk” Hurley and it’s got the Sunkist lyrics on it.

People who bought the Electronic album probably see it as a substitute for New Order, and primarily use Electronic to fill the gap until the next New Order album What do you think of that? Nicklas Mandahl Enevaldsen, Denmark Well... very pleased. Fucking hell, what do you expect me to say? Um... Thank God not everybody’s like that.

Former Factory Records boss Tony Wilson comes to you with a sure-fire business proposition that “just can’t fail”. What do you do? Kevin Leslie, Oldham Ha ha! Ha ha! Piss myself laughing. In fact that’s what happened when we were recording Every Little Counts... Tony came in with a sure-fire business proposition.

Does Steven (Morris, New Order drummer) let you play with his tank? Lee Hollows, Birmingham I’ve sat in his tank, yeah. Steve’s got a tank that he has permanently pointed at my house. Me and Steve play with it and we’re in training for Kosovo. When the troops go in, we hope be in the vanguard of operations. We’re keeping the gun well-oiled and we’re going to shove it right up Slobodan’s arse. In fact, someone up the road from Steve’s had the same tank, and they’ve got a slight design fault which means that you’re driving along and swerve, it’s uncontrollable, and this guy’s tank did this and decapitated his wife. It was because it was on the news and there was a picture of Steve’s tank - we were “Steve’s crashed the tank and Gillian’s been decapitated”. So I don’t think I’ll be going in it again.

What’s your favorite memory of Rob Gretton? Ruth Quest, Gloucester (long pause) um.,. Rob used to say to everyone, “What are you doing?” nothing, Rob, nothing: “What should you be doing? Skin up!” I’ll remember those words.

Web link/source

[lolacouldnotcareless]

12-18?

12. A song from your preteen years jonatan cerrada's je voulais te dire que je t'attends. this is also actually a cover but that's a song i was obsessed with. the funniest part being that i had no fucking idea the singer was known at the time through a music reality tv show of the time bc i didn't watch it at all

13. One of your favorite 80’s songs la vie ne m'apprend rien, straight from the year 1980, with a. conflicting style for french music at the time. for someone who cared more about the music itself than the lyrics (contrarily to most great french singers of the time), daniel balavoine sure did have things to say in an impactful way

14. A song that you would love played at your wedding my opinion on marriage isn't the most romantic at all (marriage is more about the practical things like taxes, social security and trusting someone to take the decisions for you when you're unable to make them than love, i'm afraid) but ngl i would like a small reception with less than 100 people, similar to my best friend's, with folk music that everyone both Knows and doesn't know, something that sounds like a celebration, but not very romantic i'm afraid. else we'll have to take something from my russian bullet playlist (the happy version). please let me handle the aux. please trust me. i swear i know what i'm doing (being a menace to society)

15. A song that is a cover by another artist ateez's cover of turbo's black cat or whatever name this song has in english. i'm afraid i'm utterly possessed by that cover. i've already told you about it like months ago so you may not remember but it's just. the Drama they added to the song. i love it i crave it

16. One of your favorite classical songs i love monti's czardas but i also really love how it was arranged for the cello here. it's absolutely lovely.

17. A song that would sing a duet with on karaoke total ecplise of the heart by bonnie tyler. i have no excuse i just want to be Dramatic and have fun

18. A song from the year that you were born i had to look up as i had no fucking idea dsjbfhhsdbf so i looked up the top 50 and top 100 for songs that i'd know and like, and most of those that i loved were actually from 1995 but only released as a single in 1996 (like mylène farmer with rêver) or only knew success a year later (fools garden with lemon tree, which is also apparently a song we love to learn english with at school) so i went with un-break my heart by tony braxton

[sherbertilluminated]

get to know me

tagged by @elucubrare & tagging @mendely @popcorntrash & @minipliny if you're ok with it

last song: musketeer's "Three Farmers on their Way to a Dance" got a music video recently ft. a field I could have sworn I once walked in & useful instructions on how to waltz. I'm also trying to translate "the Once & Future King" by the Mechanisms to give to my future wife

currently reading: After Babel by George Steiner (important translation theory primer) Harrow the Ninth (dammit I want to be able to talk to my friends about a book) & Pan Tadeusz by Adam Mickiewicz trans. Watson Kirkconnel (at the Our Fandom & Yours tag)

currently watching: I don't have any streaming services but every day after Russian class I flop onto my bed & watch a youtube movie with English subtitles. Today it was 1967's Viy & I wanna read Gogol so bad but right now I can barely explain my daily schedule in Russian.

current obsession: Herr Moses Herr Moses Herr Moses but he is perennial. More fleetingly that kid Tadzio from Mann's Death in Venice & the myriad forces that alienate his personhood from both Aschenbach his admirer & the reader, transforming him into the symbol & scion of a decaying classicist aristocratic idealism of which he is only nascently aware. & like. A preteen.

One day I'm gonna write a pseudepigraphical Red Calvalry story about him & queerness & assimilation & violence but first I gotta distinguish between my accusative animate & inanimate plural.

[applebandito]

100% Kingdom Hearts 1 (Day 6)

Current Targets:

Synthesis Master

Coliseum Champion

I woke up unable to remember what exactly it was I was trying to do. I stared at the synth screen for several minutes, mouth agape and face itchy from beard growth. Had I grown older? Technically yes, but this felt like actual years added to my life. I felt age wearing upon me. When was the last time I’d seen a sun that wasn’t a digitized one in a sky? When was the last time I spoke to someone when the topic wasn’t exclusively about hearts or darkness?

I pulled myself together and set my jaw firm. I had more recipes to get which  meant a massive globetrotting collectathon. Before carrying on, allow me to shout out khguides.com which saved me multiple times when it came to grinding and finding out where I needed to go and what needed to be done. I made my list and set forth to beat up the Pink Agaricus, which looks more teal than pink? I guess we’re going off its hat. I had to learn the ancient art of spamming triangle and X in order to have a ghost of a chance of getting the Serenity Power it dropped. 

Let me tell you, this process involved me seeing the same few screens of Deep Jungle over and over again, all while listening to the song an infuriating number of times. I will also say, I’m slightly in the future right now and deep into another playthrough for the final achievements and going back to Deep Jungle gave me a complex. Though now I got to watch all the cutscenes. 

Repeatedly having to jump  here and there to find white mushrooms to cast Stop on them, followed by using Bambi to get my MP back, then slapping the absolute bajeezus out of Ragnarock and the air combo so I can get the tech points high enough to even see the chance at getting this damned ingredient soon gave me coniptions. The idea of returning to this, my Vietnam, was pain. Mushrooms danced on the fringes of my eyesight as music scared my brain. Should I keep going and get more in case I need it? No, surely I’ll be fine. A fool’s mantra.

Rarer and rarer the damned ingrediants got. Pot Scorpions and very specific enemy spawns over and over. In and out of doors. It was torture. I was torturing myself. But like a masochist, I kept going back with a smile on my face. Madness, some would call it. In fact, they’d most likely be right. This was a form of mania I was suffering. Did I need to do it? A curious question. Did Hillary and Tenzing need to climb Everest? Did Simon and Garfunkle need to release banger after banger? Did Abbot and Costello need to be one of the best comedy duos?

No, was the answer. But here we were in this universe, where things were the way they were. Here we were, slaving away at a trade that we felt passionate about. People would call us broken, even mad. But we press on. I blanked out as the hours drug by but finally I’d completed 30 synth recipes. When I came to, I stared at the requirements for the ultimate weapons. 

My heart sank. The amount of farming ahead of me was tantamount to a farmer after a Russian winter. I felt a rage boiling up inside of me. An anger at not only  myself, but whoever created this. A song came into my head. Lyrics that echoed into my mind. 

“Boy, you’re gonna carry that weight. Carry that weight a long time.”

I cursed God beneath my breath as I furiously scribbled those ingredients into my notepad. If I’d had a potato chip to eat dramatically, I would’ve. My fury woke me up. It fueled me. I wasn’t going to be beaten by this game. I needed ingredients for Mythril which I in turn needed to make Dark Matter, as well as the other ingredients to simply make everything. Lucid Shards, Power Stones, all of them a nail in my tires on the long road to finishing the first game totally.

In hindsight it wasn’t that bad. Much of this is overly inflated for the sake of entertainment anyway. But it was a very painful process in order to make it to the finish line. Clutched in Sora’s hand however was now the Ultima Weapon.  A prize to be used to carry me through bosses, both big and tall. But that would come later. My dark labors finished, I sank beneath a sea of blankets and closed my eyes. The next day would see me take on another massive chunk of content.

Completed 30 of 56:

Synthesis Vet

Synthesis Master

[tianshiisdead]

🌻

The Manchu language is a critically endangered southern Tungusic language only spoken as a mother tongue by a few dozen people living in Northeastern China. The decline of the language is complicated, with factors such as the Manchu ruling class of the Qing dynasty adapting to Chinese due to convenience (even though several rulers tried to fight it by promoting Manchu language education for Manchu noble children), most Manchu people going into hiding for obvious reasons after the Qing dynasty fell, and perhaps in part the colonization of Northeastern China (also known as Manchuria) by Imperial Japan, etc. however those studying Qing dynasty China usually learn to at least read Manchu a little in order to read court documents. Ironically, despite the attempts by Emperors to promote the language, it was best preserved amongst the farmers of the Northeast who retained the culture and traditional lifestyle, far away from the Beijing court and nobility. Some northeastern Manchu autonomous villages to this day still practice traditions such as archery, shamanism, and falconry.

Tungusic is a language family in Northern China and Siberia, with Tungusic groups such as the Nanai people and the Oroqen sharing similar cultural aspects such as Shamanism. The word 'Shaman' in fact is theorized by some to come from the Tungusic 'shaman/saman' and was carried west by Russian explorers and colonizers. In Manchu, the word is 'Saman'. Manchu has heavy Mongolian influence and as a result of that, some Turkic influence as well. The script has shifted several times throughout history, but when the Jurchen tribes came together to form the Manchu in 1600s a new script was commissioned based off of the Mongolian script, which is to this day the official script of the Manchu language.

The language has historically been under Chinese influence as well however modern-day Manchu speech is heavily Chinese-influenced for, again, fairly obvious reasons. Its closest brother is the still-spoken Xibe language, which is close enough to be mutually intelligible.

Here's a Manchu song I quite like

[brookston]

Holidays 2.4

Holidays

Across the Universe Day

Box Tree Day (French Republic)

Carl Rogers Day

Colour Supplement Day (UK)

Create-A-Vacuum Day

Day for Change (UN)

Day of the Armed Struggle (Angola)

Facebook Friends Day

Farmer’s Day (Taiwan)

First Sitting of the People’s Majils (Maldives)

Friends Day

General Thaddeus Kosciuszko Day (Poland)

International Day of Human Fraternity (UN)

International Unicorn Day

King Frost Day (London, before WWI)

Kosciusko Day (Poland)

Liberace Day

Lifeguard Day (Argentina)

Montgomery Convention Day

National Day of Courage

National Hemp Day

National Israel Day

National Quacker Day

National Wicker Day

Obscurity Day

Philippine-AmericanWar Memorial Day (Philippines)

Port Arthur Day

Rissun (Japan)

Rosa Parks Day (California, Missouri) [also 12.1]

Semen Den (Seeds Day; Bulgaria)

Special Working Day (China)

Spoiled Cats’ Day

Thank A Mailperson Day

Torture Abolition Day

Transit Equity Day

USO Day

Willie Mays Day

World Cancer Day

Zombie Pride Day

Food & Drink Celebrations

Homemade Soup Day

Medjool Date Day

National Stuffed Mushroom Day

Pork Rind Appreciation Day

1st Sunday in February

Areté Day (Southwestern Cross-Quarter; Aretéanism) [1st Sunday]

British Yorkshire Pudding Day [1st Sunday]

Dump Your Significant Jerk Day [1st Sunday]

Freelance Writers Appreciation Week begins [1st Sunday]

Homstrom (Burning of the Straw Man; Switzerland) [1st Sunday]

India MS Day (India) [1st Sunday]

National Day of Prayer for the African American & African Family [1st Sunday]

National Girls and Women in Sports Day [1st Sunday]

New Martyrs and Confessors of the Russian Orthodox Church (Sunday nearest 2.7]

Scout Sunday [or Sunday before 2.8]

St. Ives’ Feast (Cornwall, UK) [Sunday nearest February 3]

World Cepelinai Day [1st Sunday]

Independence & Related Days

Celebration of the Beginning of the Struggle for Liberation (Angola)

Liberation Day (Angola)

Sri Lanka (from UK, 1948)

Festivals Beginning February 4, 2024

Grammy Awards (Los Angeles, California)

Lowcountry Oyster Festival (Mt. Pleasant, South Carolina)

The New York Best Wings Festival (Smithtown, New York)

Sapporo Snow Festival (Sapporo, Japan) [thru 2.11]

Wine Classic (Los Angeles, California)

Feast Days

Aeschylus (Positivist; Saint)

Amaterasu’s Day (Pagan)

Andrew Corsini (Christian; Saint)

Annoy the Neighbors Day (Pastafarian)

Beith Day (a..k.a. Birch Day; Celtic Book of Days)

Biezputras Diena (Porridge Day; Ancient Latvia) [or Sun before Feb 23]

Cornelius the Centurion (Anglican Church; Saint)

Day of the Fart of Abu Hassan (Church of the SubGenius) 

Emperor Norton (Humanism)

Fernand Léger (Artology)

Gilbert of Sempringham (Christian; Saint)

Isidore of Pelusium (Christian; Saint)

Jane (or Joan, Queen of France; Christian; Saint)

John de Britto (Christian; Saint)

Joseph of Leonissa (Christian; Saint)

Gilbert (Christian; Saint)

Goldrofe of Arganil (Christian; Saint)

Gumby (Animism; Saint)

Home Cleansing Ritual Day (Starza Pagan Book of Days)

Louis Eilshemius (Artology)

Medan (Christian; Saint)

Nicholas Studites (Christian; Saint)

Phileas and Philoromus (Christian; Martyrs)

Rabanus Maurus (Christian; Saint)

Rembertof Torhout (Christian; Saint)

Rimbert (Archbishop of Bremen;  Christian; Saint)

Robert Coover (Writerism)

The State of Indiana (Muppetism)

Theophilus the Penitent (Christian; Saint)

Veronica (Christian; Saint)

Zeus Day (Church of the SubGenius; Saint) 

Lucky & Unlucky Days

Dismal Day (Unlucky or Evil Day; Medieval Europe; 3 of 24)

Egyptian Day (Dies Mala Unlucky Day; Middle Ages Europe) [3 of 24]

Fatal Day (Pagan) [4 of 24]

Lucky Day (Philippines) [8 of 71]

Shakku (赤口 Japan) [Bad luck all day, except at noon.]

Premieres

Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (Film; 1994)

Across the Universe, recorded by The Beatles (Song; 1968)

The Atrocity Exhibition, by J.G. Ballard (Novel; 1970)

Bennie and the Jets, by Elton John (Song; 1974)

Candle in the Wind, by Elton John (Song; 1974)

The Cloverfield Paradox (Film; 2018)

The Devil’s Tower (Animated TV Show;Jonny Quest #21; 1965)

Dick Tracy (Radio Series; 1934)

Dizzy Dishes (Noveltoons Cartoon; 1955)

End of the Century, by The Ramones (Album; 1980)

Facebook (Social Media App; 2004)

Fresh Off the Boat (TV Series; 2015)

Hen Fruit (Oswald the Lucky Rabbit Cartoon; 1929)

Hep Cat Symphony (Noveltoons Cartoon; 1949)

His Day Off (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1938)

The Human Comedy, buy William Saroyan (Novel; 1943)

Justice League: War (WB Animated Film; 2014)

The Last Juror, by John Grisham (Novel; 2004)

The Last of the Mohicans (Novel; 1826)

Magic Strength (Phantasies Cartoon; 1944)

Moonfall (Film; 2022)

Naked (Film; 1994)

19th Nervous Breakdown, by The Rolling Stones (Song; 1966)

One Step Ahead of My Shadow (WB MM Cartoon; 1933)

On the Avenue (Film; 1937)

Our Town, by Thornton Wilder (Play; 1938)

Patton (Film; 1970)

Piano Concerto in E Major, by Reynaldo Hahn (Piano Concerto; 1931)

Reacher (TV Series; 2022)

Rumours, by Fleetwood Mac (Album; 1977)

Señor Saint, by Leslie Charteris (Short Stories 1958) [Saint #34]

A Study in Brown, by Glen Gray and His Casa Loma Orchestra (Song; 1937)

Two Days to Doom or The Last Weekend (Rocky & Bullwinkle Cartoon, S5, Ep. 253; 1964)

Two Moose is Loose or Which One Has the Phoney? (Rocky & Bullwinkle Cartoon, S5, Ep. 254; 1964)

The Ugly Dachshund (Film; 1966)

Videodrome (Film; 1983)

The Wedding Date (Film; 2005)

White Christmas, recorded by The Drifters (Song; 1954)

Winnie the Pooh and the Honey Tree (Disney Cartoon; 1966)

Zeno's Conscience, by Italo Svevo (Novel; 1923)

Today’s Name Days

Andreas, Rabanus, Veronika (Austria)

Andrija, Ivan, Izidor, Veronika (Croatia)

Jarmila (Czech Republic)

Veronica (Denmark)

Arma, Armi, Armiida, Meida, Miida (Estonia)

Armi, Ronja (Finland)

Véronique (France)

Andreas, Jenny, Veronika (Germany)

Asimakis, Asimina, Malamati, Simeon, Stamatia, Stamatis (Greece)

Csenge, Ráhel (Hungary)

Biago, Gilberto (Italy)

Daila, Veronika (Latvia)

Andrius, Arvilė, Gustas, Joana, Vydmantas (Lithuania)

Vera, Veronika (Norway)

Andrzej, Gilbert, Jan, Joanna, Józef, Mariusz, Weronika, Witosława (Poland)

Isidor (Romania)

Anastasia (Russia)

Veronika (Slovakia)

Gilberto, Juan, Juana (Spain)

Anselm, Ansgar (Sweden)

Byron, Gilbert, Gilberta, Gilberto, Gilmer (USA)

Today is Also…

Day of Year: Day 35 of 2024; 331 days remaining in the year

ISO: Day 7 of week 5 of 2024

Celtic Tree Calendar: Luis (Rowan) [Day 15 of 28]

Chinese: Month 12 (Yi-Chou), Day 25 (Wu-Xu)

Chinese Year of the: Rabbit 4721 (until February 10, 2024)

Hebrew: 25 Shevat 5784

Islamic: 24 Rajab 1445

J Cal: 5 Grey; Fryday [5 of 30]

Julian: 22 January 2024

Moon: 33%: Waning Crescent

Positivist: 7 Homer (2nd Month) [Aeschylus)

Runic Half Month: Elhaz (Elk) [Day 11 of 15]

Season: Winter (Day 46 of 89)

Zodiac: Capricorn (Day 14 of 28)

[brookstonalmanac]

Holidays 2.4

Holidays

Across the Universe Day

Box Tree Day (French Republic)

Carl Rogers Day

Colour Supplement Day (UK)

Create-A-Vacuum Day

Day for Change (UN)

Day of the Armed Struggle (Angola)

Facebook Friends Day

Farmer’s Day (Taiwan)

First Sitting of the People’s Majils (Maldives)

Friends Day

General Thaddeus Kosciuszko Day (Poland)

International Day of Human Fraternity (UN)

International Unicorn Day

King Frost Day (London, before WWI)

Kosciusko Day (Poland)

Liberace Day

Lifeguard Day (Argentina)

Montgomery Convention Day

National Day of Courage

National Hemp Day

National Israel Day

National Quacker Day

National Wicker Day

Obscurity Day

Philippine-AmericanWar Memorial Day (Philippines)

Port Arthur Day

Rissun (Japan)

Rosa Parks Day (California, Missouri) [also 12.1]

Semen Den (Seeds Day; Bulgaria)

Special Working Day (China)

Spoiled Cats’ Day

Thank A Mailperson Day

Torture Abolition Day

Transit Equity Day

USO Day

Willie Mays Day

World Cancer Day

Zombie Pride Day

Food & Drink Celebrations

Homemade Soup Day

Medjool Date Day

National Stuffed Mushroom Day

Pork Rind Appreciation Day

1st Sunday in February

Areté Day (Southwestern Cross-Quarter; Aretéanism) [1st Sunday]

British Yorkshire Pudding Day [1st Sunday]

Dump Your Significant Jerk Day [1st Sunday]

Freelance Writers Appreciation Week begins [1st Sunday]

Homstrom (Burning of the Straw Man; Switzerland) [1st Sunday]

India MS Day (India) [1st Sunday]

National Day of Prayer for the African American & African Family [1st Sunday]

National Girls and Women in Sports Day [1st Sunday]

New Martyrs and Confessors of the Russian Orthodox Church (Sunday nearest 2.7]

Scout Sunday [or Sunday before 2.8]

St. Ives’ Feast (Cornwall, UK) [Sunday nearest February 3]

World Cepelinai Day [1st Sunday]

Independence & Related Days

Celebration of the Beginning of the Struggle for Liberation (Angola)

Liberation Day (Angola)

Sri Lanka (from UK, 1948)

Festivals Beginning February 4, 2024

Grammy Awards (Los Angeles, California)

Lowcountry Oyster Festival (Mt. Pleasant, South Carolina)

The New York Best Wings Festival (Smithtown, New York)

Sapporo Snow Festival (Sapporo, Japan) [thru 2.11]

Wine Classic (Los Angeles, California)

Feast Days

Aeschylus (Positivist; Saint)

Amaterasu’s Day (Pagan)

Andrew Corsini (Christian; Saint)

Annoy the Neighbors Day (Pastafarian)

Beith Day (a..k.a. Birch Day; Celtic Book of Days)

Biezputras Diena (Porridge Day; Ancient Latvia) [or Sun before Feb 23]

Cornelius the Centurion (Anglican Church; Saint)

Day of the Fart of Abu Hassan (Church of the SubGenius) 

Emperor Norton (Humanism)

Fernand Léger (Artology)

Gilbert of Sempringham (Christian; Saint)

Isidore of Pelusium (Christian; Saint)

Jane (or Joan, Queen of France; Christian; Saint)

John de Britto (Christian; Saint)

Joseph of Leonissa (Christian; Saint)

Gilbert (Christian; Saint)

Goldrofe of Arganil (Christian; Saint)

Gumby (Animism; Saint)

Home Cleansing Ritual Day (Starza Pagan Book of Days)

Louis Eilshemius (Artology)

Medan (Christian; Saint)

Nicholas Studites (Christian; Saint)

Phileas and Philoromus (Christian; Martyrs)

Rabanus Maurus (Christian; Saint)

Rembertof Torhout (Christian; Saint)

Rimbert (Archbishop of Bremen;  Christian; Saint)

Robert Coover (Writerism)

The State of Indiana (Muppetism)

Theophilus the Penitent (Christian; Saint)

Veronica (Christian; Saint)

Zeus Day (Church of the SubGenius; Saint) 

Lucky & Unlucky Days

Dismal Day (Unlucky or Evil Day; Medieval Europe; 3 of 24)

Egyptian Day (Dies Mala Unlucky Day; Middle Ages Europe) [3 of 24]

Fatal Day (Pagan) [4 of 24]

Lucky Day (Philippines) [8 of 71]

Shakku (赤口 Japan) [Bad luck all day, except at noon.]

Premieres

Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (Film; 1994)

Across the Universe, recorded by The Beatles (Song; 1968)

The Atrocity Exhibition, by J.G. Ballard (Novel; 1970)

Bennie and the Jets, by Elton John (Song; 1974)

Candle in the Wind, by Elton John (Song; 1974)

The Cloverfield Paradox (Film; 2018)

The Devil’s Tower (Animated TV Show;Jonny Quest #21; 1965)

Dick Tracy (Radio Series; 1934)

Dizzy Dishes (Noveltoons Cartoon; 1955)

End of the Century, by The Ramones (Album; 1980)

Facebook (Social Media App; 2004)

Fresh Off the Boat (TV Series; 2015)

Hen Fruit (Oswald the Lucky Rabbit Cartoon; 1929)

Hep Cat Symphony (Noveltoons Cartoon; 1949)

His Day Off (Terrytoons Cartoon; 1938)

The Human Comedy, buy William Saroyan (Novel; 1943)

Justice League: War (WB Animated Film; 2014)

The Last Juror, by John Grisham (Novel; 2004)

The Last of the Mohicans (Novel; 1826)

Magic Strength (Phantasies Cartoon; 1944)

Moonfall (Film; 2022)

Naked (Film; 1994)

19th Nervous Breakdown, by The Rolling Stones (Song; 1966)

One Step Ahead of My Shadow (WB MM Cartoon; 1933)

On the Avenue (Film; 1937)

Our Town, by Thornton Wilder (Play; 1938)

Patton (Film; 1970)

Piano Concerto in E Major, by Reynaldo Hahn (Piano Concerto; 1931)

Reacher (TV Series; 2022)

Rumours, by Fleetwood Mac (Album; 1977)

Señor Saint, by Leslie Charteris (Short Stories 1958) [Saint #34]

A Study in Brown, by Glen Gray and His Casa Loma Orchestra (Song; 1937)

Two Days to Doom or The Last Weekend (Rocky & Bullwinkle Cartoon, S5, Ep. 253; 1964)

Two Moose is Loose or Which One Has the Phoney? (Rocky & Bullwinkle Cartoon, S5, Ep. 254; 1964)

The Ugly Dachshund (Film; 1966)

Videodrome (Film; 1983)

The Wedding Date (Film; 2005)

White Christmas, recorded by The Drifters (Song; 1954)

Winnie the Pooh and the Honey Tree (Disney Cartoon; 1966)

Zeno's Conscience, by Italo Svevo (Novel; 1923)

Today’s Name Days

Andreas, Rabanus, Veronika (Austria)

Andrija, Ivan, Izidor, Veronika (Croatia)

Jarmila (Czech Republic)

Veronica (Denmark)

Arma, Armi, Armiida, Meida, Miida (Estonia)

Armi, Ronja (Finland)

Véronique (France)

Andreas, Jenny, Veronika (Germany)

Asimakis, Asimina, Malamati, Simeon, Stamatia, Stamatis (Greece)

Csenge, Ráhel (Hungary)

Biago, Gilberto (Italy)

Daila, Veronika (Latvia)

Andrius, Arvilė, Gustas, Joana, Vydmantas (Lithuania)

Vera, Veronika (Norway)

Andrzej, Gilbert, Jan, Joanna, Józef, Mariusz, Weronika, Witosława (Poland)

Isidor (Romania)

Anastasia (Russia)

Veronika (Slovakia)

Gilberto, Juan, Juana (Spain)

Anselm, Ansgar (Sweden)

Byron, Gilbert, Gilberta, Gilberto, Gilmer (USA)

Today is Also…

Day of Year: Day 35 of 2024; 331 days remaining in the year

ISO: Day 7 of week 5 of 2024

Celtic Tree Calendar: Luis (Rowan) [Day 15 of 28]

Chinese: Month 12 (Yi-Chou), Day 25 (Wu-Xu)

Chinese Year of the: Rabbit 4721 (until February 10, 2024)

Hebrew: 25 Shevat 5784

Islamic: 24 Rajab 1445

J Cal: 5 Grey; Fryday [5 of 30]

Julian: 22 January 2024

Moon: 33%: Waning Crescent

Positivist: 7 Homer (2nd Month) [Aeschylus)

Runic Half Month: Elhaz (Elk) [Day 11 of 15]

Season: Winter (Day 46 of 89)

Zodiac: Capricorn (Day 14 of 28)

[littleharpethcrossfit]

Thanksgiving Thursday, 23 November.

Class begins at 8 AM

It was a chilly but very sunny Thanksgiving morning.

Warmup

3 Rounds

1 Minute Banded Shoulder Stretch's

10 PVC Dislocates

5 Naked Barbell Power Snatch's

Not many were interested in doing the warmup. Larry led us in our traditional mobility exercises, but participation in the prescribed warmup listed above was minimal.

Strength

Power Snatch

2 Reps Every 2 Minutes For 5 Sets

Touch & Go

Increase Weight If Successful

Decrease Weight If Failure

Larry/Armando/Amato=135 Robert=125 Ed=115 Smoothie/Nathan=105 Kati G/Chip=85 Coach/Kayla/Kati W=75 Cherrita/Katie P=65 Linda/Rodney=55 Amos & Dad=12 kg Aiden/Angel/Warren A/Big Lew/Winnie/and a few others=PJ

WOD

12 Minute AMRAP

For Rounds and Fractions

12 / 9 Calories Any ERG

40 Foot Farmer's Walk (70/53/35) (2 KB or DB)

10 Hand-To-Hand Russian KettleBell Swings (70/53/35)

40 Foot SandBag Bear Hug (100 / 50)

Ed and Amato did a 20 minute AMRAP but only posted the 12.

Nathan/Kati G=6 1/2 Cherrita/Katie P/Kati W=6 1/4 Robert/Larry/Ed/Armando/Kayla/Chip=6 Smoothie=5 3/4 Rodney/Amato=5 1/4 Coach/Linda=5 Amos & Dad=4 1/4 Aiden/Angel/Warren A/Big Lew/Winnie and others=PJ

Extra Credit

Run / Jog / Walk Arboretum LOOP

Do 25 Inclined Pushups On Each Grey Bench (5)

The Gregory clan and the other two Katie (Kati)'s did this and maybe Warren A and Amato.

Notes:

Robert replaced the monitor on Rower #4 without being asked. Chipmunks had packed birdseed into the old monitor (much to Timmy The Cruel's delight) and caused it to short out or something seedy. Timmy was assigned to fix the monitor but since Robert beat him to it Timmy will volunteer to remove and replace all of our Party Lights. Brother Ed will likely help him. There are 200 feet of new Party Lights arriving soon. I'm hoping that this footage will suffice to go around the picnic table AND the shed part of the Barn.

The number and variety of athletes who show up at LHCF on major holidays has always surprised me. There were over 25 here for an 0800 Thanksgiving party.

Rodney reminded us that today was the anniversary of that fateful day when we loudly sang the Happy Birthday song for Rodney, bringing a red-faced-hung-over neighbor screaming at us over the Arboretum fence. There followed a few years of visits by City Commissioners, a few visits by Brentwoods' Men In Blue, some Attorneys for several parties, and even 2 different audio engineers with decibel meters recording our noise. And then there were subpoenas, depositions, an out-of-court settlement, a sale of property, and finally a new, more tolerant neighbor. All because of Rodney and he didn't even remember what birthday that was.

Saturday at 0730 and at 0930.

I will not be here for the 0930, so you will enjoy the bonus of better coaching.

I promise that the workout is more traditionally CrossFit than today's.

[mad3jokes]

Good Joke Of The Day

jesus funny jokes - women jokes - studying funny - little red riding hood - psychology jokes - group of frogs - funny hate - bear - wake up - fulfilling life - funny skeleton - conceited - engagement quotes - police humor - ideas for the house - stormy night - find a boyfriend - daily funny - songs - lady godiva - funny joke quote - great jokes - very bad - golf with friends - golden egg - funny cartoon quotes - winter jokes - pink - funny math jokes - tax day - romantic quotes for her - life quotes deep - funny doctor quotes - motivational poems - physical touch - tree story - doctor humor - high school - lectures funny - late night jokes - russian restaurant - wolf call - high jokes funny - butter bread - poor quotes - shopping humor - english jokes - funny marriage advice - gym fails funny - funny goodnight texts - heart touching story - clean funny jokes - sermon - funny truck quotes - old friends funny - history jokes - funny mom quotes - laugh out loud jokes - anniversary quotes for husband - red riding hood story - school essay - funny inspirational quotes - hair jokes - quick jokes - healthy motivation quotes - dear self quotes - funny picture quotes - fishing humor - latest funny jokes - house funny - really funny joke - funny relationship quotes - casual relationship - tommie smith - american soldiers - funny family jokes - cookies recipes chocolate chip - jewish humor - best friend quotes distance - short inspirational christmas stories - grandmother jokes - funny blonde jokes - husband quotes funny - construction humor - funny cartoons - jokes photos - 40 year anniversary - best funny images - police jokes - cold jokes - work quotes funny - women humor - fathers day jokes - teacher - friends funny - patient humor - funeral jokes - funny pix - hugs and kisses quotes - things to come - passed away - soreness - halloween jokes - cooking lessons - russian jokes - a good man - one liner jokes - cleaning quotes funny - man - fun quotes funny - shadow wolf - college students funny - revenge funny - one - funny new year - jokes - wine jokes - faith moves mountains - red dress - young farmers - hotel humor - the struts - sleep funny - citizen - public execution - read bible - mom life quotes - good jokes for adults - angel quotes - family balancing - break up texts - med student humor - fine ceramic - wisdom quotes funny - happy wife happy life - girlfriend jokes - text jokes - joke of the day - family humor - giving quotes - ink blot - grumpy old men quotes - funny fart quotes - canada funny - dark blue suit - best friends funny - diet jokes - wisdom quotes life - local butcher shop - inspirational quotes with images - anniversary quotes funny - catholic jokes - eye jokes - work jokes - cute animal videos - writing humor - math humor - good morning funny pictures - pray always - latest jokes - funny love story - kind heart - boyfriend quotes funny - comedians jokes - white beard - long funny stories - engaged to be married - grammar humor funny - short jokes funny - old couple in love - quotes about strength in hard times - sins - amish men - life lessons - english story - funny church signs - famous names - you are my friend - poultry farm - friendship quotes funny - funny birthday jokes - funny work jokes - letters to god - cheating husband quotes - pilot joke - you are the father - vacation humor - beautiful girlfriend - christmas gift jokes - adult dirty jokes - the monks - kangaroo funny - funny cartoons jokes - funny quotes sarcasm - prison jokes - inspirational quotes god - very funny photos - father son quotes - deepest sympathy - butterfly wings - restaurant humor - buddha face - chinese restaurant - telugu inspirational quotes - exams funny - funny stories - bar jokes - funny cartoon pictures - envelope - insurance humor - horse racing - funny chinese jokes - cute little animals - catholic priest - bear jokes - places to visit - broadway shows - let your light shine - jewish men - firefighter humor - big bad wolf - good jokes - getting older humor

[hub2jokes]

Funny Day Joke

funny family photos - collision course - umbrella - husband quotes funny - see and say - sheep - funny feelings - funny encouragement - funny riddles - go to sleep - walmart jokes - christmas humor - third grade writing - inspirational quotes about love - cookies recipes chocolate chip - funny monsters - catholic women - what is true love - college students funny - short funny stories - dirty laundry quote - condoms funny - married life quotes - good night funny - east village - funny compliments - job humor - winter jokes - fat pig - butter bread - wisdom quotes funny - grammar humor funny - history jokes - songs - bartender funny - cant sleep - anniversary funny - getting older quotes - silly jokes - new ferrari - good night photo images - blue suit - funny good morning quotes - chocolate chip cookies - sarcastic quotes funny - fishing quotes funny - army jokes - a good man - positive morning quotes - no way out - yoga school - positive quotes for life motivation - morning jokes - janitor - two men - inspirational good morning messages - jolly phonics - sick humor - daily jokes - story - church jokes - mother teach - pizza funny - home quotes and sayings - jump quotes - very funny pictures - funny hate - funny old people - dentist jokes - nurse jokes - weekend quotes - funny picture quotes - love you funny - bear - mom humor - very funny photos - funny billboards - good morning happy - jackdaw - real funny jokes - fat cats funny - good jokes for adults - tuesday quotes good morning - taxi driver - sleep funny - wooden bowls - russian restaurant - friday night at home funny - bad temper - baseball jokes - blonde jokes - appreciate life quotes - how to wake up early - funny joke gifts - overworked quotes - humor - priest jokes - catholic men - in this moment - funny mom jokes - red riding hood story - atheist quotes - new year jokes - family jokes - envelope - jokes photos - getting older humor - monkeys funny - sake - eat together - things to wear - naked quote - show of hands - father humor - crazy jokes - i go to work - restoration - call husband - math jokes - funny city - short jokes - go shopping - monk - to reach - life quotes to live by - good doctor - anniversary quotes for husband - the trooper - you lied to me - serious quotes - funny skeleton - school jokes - prison jokes - childhood friends quotes - citizen - pray always - tattoo parlors - being there for someone quotes - animals funny cats - funny - marriage jokes - writing humor - you are the father - mother in law - funny minion quotes - love my wife quotes - inspirational poems - quick funny jokes - names - beautiful birds - love deeply - grape bunch - amazing inspirational quotes - funny work jokes - i take a nap - firefighter humor - eye black - sympathy quotes - adult dirty jokes - mr funny - funny nurse quotes - irish men - studying funny - school humor - butterfly wings - christmas poems - tarzan funny - candidate - best mom quotes - pray - funny text message jokes - the struts - patient humor - really funny joke - tax day - inspirational short stories - very funny jokes - famous art - olds - sunday prayer - lion - funny birthday jokes - very funny short jokes - friendship cards quotes - straw - two brothers - english story - mother - character quotes - old lady humor - chemistry jokes - story people - funny facts - christmas tale - vocabulary lessons - laundry quotes funny - farmer jokes - one - dna test results - old women - wolf - the third man - puppies funny - fishing jokes - art jokes - paulo coelho - cant sleep funny - passbook - grandma funny - funny animals - being a landlord - funny school jokes - lectures funny - lawyer jokes - cuckoo - happy birthday teacher - difficult relationship quotes - deer camp - inspirational christmas stories - nice poetry - funny true stories - hotel humor - comedians jokes - personal development activities - best funny images - funny love story - presidents - homemade recipes - dog jokes - conceited - sweet quotes - shadow wolf - funny drunk pictures