Vargskelethor, Craig Cairns
Robert Cop (Remake)
Skeleton Metal X (2023)
I don't know how they managed it, but this version of Robert Cop is actually intensely more awesome than the original track!! Craig Cairns' vocals add so darn much to this amazing track!
Yes, i HAD to make an epic-looking version of Robert Cop (mostly based on the classic and reboot versions of RoboCop with some neat additions). Thank you for fueling me once again, Vargskelethor 👍
A very little something I wrote when I was feeling sad. Possibly pre-slash, around 150 words
Eddie becomes a plant dad, and he introduces Steve to all his babies. There’s Tree Beard and Quickbeam and Leaflock and Beechbone and Skinbark—
“And this,” he says, gesturing proudly to a pot with long crinkly leaves bursting out of it, “is Robert.”
Steve blinks. “Robert?”
“Yeah.”
“How come all the others get weird names—”
“They’re named after Ents.” Eddie pauses. “Well, except for Smaug, the dragon tree.”
“And this one is Robert?”
“Because he’s a plant.”
“Yeah, I can see that.”
“No, like… Robert Plant.”
Cue a blank look from Steve.
“Led Zeppelin!”
“Oh. Right.” Steve huffs. “Cute.”
“I thought so.”
“You’re such a dork.”
“But you think I’m cute.”
“I didn’t—” Steve’s face heats. “Whatever.” He crosses his arms and nods at the plant. “Just— Tell me about Robert.”
Eddie grins, but he starts talking, telling Steve all about Robert, things Steve will maybe only half remember, hands gesturing wildly, and Steve gets lost in the daydream of a house filled with plants, and Eddie there to tell him all about them.
Dale Gribble took a job at a Hooters equivalent specifically because he expected them to do gender discrimination against him for being an ugly man and planned to sue on those grounds. The manager called his bluff and hired him. Dale is not good at working so he sucked at the job and the women hated him for getting hired over their friends who would actually be good at the job.
But through the course of the episode Dale, and we the audience, realize that these women are being treated like shit. They're sexually harassed by customers constantly, aren't even tipped well, and are exploited by management. When Dale is pantsed the women stand up for him and fight off the man who did it (of course this is actually a wild misunderstanding).
Then Dale and the ladies address management about their unacceptable work conditions.
It starts out with a common conservative "Reverse Discrimination" talking point and ends with collective labor action in the face of sexual harassment and sexist, unsafe working conditions. We meet these people who are seen as dumb bimbos and learn they are hard-working, highly skilled, and deserve better. That Dale Gribble is not good enough to do the job they do every day. He eventually gets fired for stealing and sucking at his job.
This episode also demonstrates the kinds of outfits men should wear. Why don't men wear tiny shorts and crop tops anymore? We used to be a society.