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feelssogoodinmyarms · 6 years ago

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(Kiss meme 11, ernitz?)

Yesss of course!! This is in au where Moritz survives his suicide attempt, so tw for that. Enjoy :’)

wc: 524

11. “I almost lost you” kiss

Read on AO3

~~~

Moritz felt a touch on his shoulder and rolled over in the bed. “Mmm?”

“Moritz?”

Moritz’s eyes snapped open, and just as he suspected, Ernst Robel is standing next to him, dark eyes shining with tears. Moritz slowly sat up, unable to tear his gaze from the brokenhearted boy next to him.

“Ernst, I…” Moritz trailed off, unable to find the words. Ernst’s eyes shifted to the fluorescent lights and the rose arrangement on the table next to the hospital bed.

“Who sent them?” he asked, gesturing to the flowers.

“Martha,” Moritz chuckled nervously, trying to decipher if Ernst is mad at him or not.

“Why?”

“Well you know how she talks about letting her children grow like the weeds-”

“Why did you do it, Moritz?”

Moritz froze and swallowed hard, eyes cast downward at the sheet on his lap, pale as his own skin.

“I didn’t have any other choice. I felt like no one cared and that I had no other option. The whole world was coming down around me and I thought everyone would be better off if I wasn’t here.” Moritz wanted to say more but Ernst had sat down next to him.

“Can I hug you?” his voice cracked with tears and it made Moritz’s heart break. He nodded and melted into Ernst’s touch. Ernst head laid on Moritz’s shoulder and he could feel his friend’s body start to shake with sobs. Moritz couldn’t help but crumble, tears pouring for the upteenth time this week. Ernst was so warm and Moritz felt safe in his arms. He could feel Ernst’s tears wetting his shirt but he didn’t care, it was the best human contact he had felt in months. Ernst ran his fingers up in down Moritz’s back and he sighed. He could smell Ernst’s shampoo and his sweater was soft against Moritz’s face, he felt like he could drown in everything Ernst was.

“Don’t do that ever again,” Ernst whispered through sobs.

“I won’t, I promise.”

“I love you,” Ernst whispered. Moritz froze and felt Ernst’s body tense.

Moritz broke away from the hug to stare at Ernst’s face which was flushed beet red. Moritz wanted to say something, tell Ernst he loved him too and probably had since seventh grade, that he was the person Moritz would have missed most if he had died. Instead he leaned forward and connected their lips for a moment and pulled back before Ernst could react.

“I’m so sorry!” Moritz gasped and tried to apologize more, but Ernst pressed his lips against Moritz’s. His hands cupped Moritz’s cheeks. Moritz wasn’t really sure to put his hands until he felt Ernst guide his arms to his waist. Ernst’s hands move back to Moritz’s face and he sighed into Ernst’s mouth.

When they finally break apart Ernst laid his head on Moritz’s chest. Moritz’s hand finds Ernst’s and he feels Ernst’s thumb trace the back of his hand. Moritz’s chin rested on the top of Ernst’s head and in that moment Moritz felt so safe; silently thanking whatever higher being there may be that he was alive.

kiss prompt list!!

#yaaasss #rhiannon writes #ernst robel #moritz stiefel #ernitz #spring awakening #sa #dwsa #request #kiss prompts #spring awakeing #deaf west spring awakening

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landoftheodd · 7 years ago

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reblog if you’re as into it as Ben

#ben fankhauser #Newsies #davey jacobs #spring awakening #spring awaking 1st national tour #ernst robel #TotallyTrucked #Totally Trucked

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they-say-you-go-blind · 7 years ago

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For the prompt thing could you do 20, 85, or 108 for spring awakening? Preferably hernst but whatever...

Oh, That Kind of Dream

In Order of Use: 108. “I just want this.” 85. “I could never leave you, I love you too much!”20. “Could you be happy here with me?”

A/N: I found a good way to use all three! Thanks for the Prompt!

Ernst was in his room, doing schoolwork, when Hanschen Rilow strode in. He walked over to the blushing boy, and kissed him.

Ernst was in shock. “W-what was that?”

Hanschen smirked as he replied. “A kiss. What do you think it was?”

“This can’t be happening!” Ernst spoke, shocked.

“It is, I love you Ernst!” Hanschen kissed him again. Ernst smiled into the kiss, standing up to meet the blonde full on..

“You have a boyfriend!” Ernst pushed Hanschen away, but the boy persisted.

“I just want this.” Hans made a move for Ernst waist, leading him from his work desk and pressing him into the bed.

“Please! I don’t want Gabor mad at me!” Ernst tried to get out of his grasp, laughing when Hans tickled his sides. .

“It’s not your fault if he gets mad. I want you. Come on, Ernst.”

“Oh, okay,” he blushed, “if you want it.”

“Oh, I do.” Hans started to kiss him again with renewed passion and flair.

Ernst jolted awake, sitting up in his bed and looking around. He reached for his phone. The illuminated screen read 2:14 am. The light was still on in his room, his school computer was still charging in the corner, and not a soul had tried to wake him. When he was sure it was just a dream, he fell back onto the pillows in relief. ‘Oh my god.’ He thought and gave a slight chuckle. He wasn’t sure what to do. His dream had been, interesting. He had a vivid memory or what it felt to be pursued by Hanschen Rilow.

He was terrified of thinking about his best friend that way. He was embarrassed, knowing that Hans and Melchior were dating. He didn’t know what to do, so he called the only person he thought he could. “Anna, I think I’m in love.”

Anna had seen her best friend looking at Hanschen, the way that she looked at Martha and the way Moritz looked at Melchior, so she wasn’t surprised when the news finally broke. She just hadn’t expected it to break at 2:30 in the morning.

“What makes you say that?” She tried to be chill, as chill as she could be.

“I had a dream I slept with him.” Though it wasn’t false, Ernst regretted his word choice immediately.

“Ernst! He’s dating Melchior!” Anna scolded through the phone, she had always thought Ernst to be so pure.

“I know! I know!” Ernst tried to defend himself.“Well you’ve gotta tell him.” Anna suggested. She knew full well he would shoot it down. She wasn’t about to give up, though. She’d bring up up some other time that wasn’t this early. “No way! I just needed to get this off my chest.” Ernst shook his head, and wished Anna goodnight.

The next day, Ernst couldn’t even look at Hanschen. He was mortified all of Latin class, the two being left as partners to conjugate verbs. Hanschen suspected something had happened to make Ernst appear so flustered, but felt as though he wasn’t the cause of the other boys discomfort.

A little less than 2 weeks had gone by, and he had almost calmed down. Things were back to normal. Melchior and Hanschen still snuck away together whenever they could, Martha and Thea always held hands going down the hallway, and Moritz, Anna, and Ernst had returned to their respective ‘sad single kids’ club. Hanschen, however clam his exterior had been, was certain Ernst was still not okay. He decided to confront him during band, but Ernst had made some excuse to go to the restroom. Hanschen didn’t understand why his best friend was acting so strange.

They were at some crowded house party. The music was loud. Some people were drinking, others were dancing, but Ernst was only focused on the boy who had just approached him.

“Ernst, baby. Please come to a spare room with me.” Ernst chuckled a little bit, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. Hanschen grabbed onto his shoulders for stability.

“Hans, you’re wasted.” Ernst took his hands away, but the other boy wrapped them around his waist.

“Jesus, learn to live a little.” Hans pulled Ernst close, kissing his neck.“I- I am not losing -my virginity in a drunken hookup.” Ernst stuttered, as he never would’ve expected Hanschen to do that. He brought the boy up to his lips. Ernst wasn’t sure how long had passed when Hanschen pulled away.

“So, shall we?” Hanschen whispered into Ernst’s ear.

“No.” Ernst shoved Hanschen away, and continued.

“I want it to be with someone I love. You’d never even stay the next morning.”

“Yes I would!” Hanschen took offense to the comment.

“You’d leave right after you orgasamed. I know you too well.”

“I could never leave you, I love you too much!”

Ernst jolted awake. ‘Oh no. Not again.’ While the dream didn’t finish, he still felt dirty. Ernst had reverted back into his shame. He wanted to get out.

“I’m so embarrassed.” He sat down across from Anna, before anyone else had gotten to the table. It was lunchtime and he hadn’t seen her all day, except for when she was talking in a big group. More specifically, a big group with Hanschen

“What’s wrong?” She spoke. Ernst shot her a look. She then understood Ernst’s distress.

“Have another dream?” She teased.

“Shut up, Wheelan.” He playfully pleaded with her as she continued.“Oh God, mmm. Oh, Hanschen!” She moaned, mimicking what she thought Ernsts’ dream entailed.

He turned a brighter shade of red, looking around to see if anyone had heard. No one had, but as he turned around he saw someone so gorgeous. Hanschen came out of the lunch line, and started walking over to their table.

“Knock it off. You say nothing.” Ernst turned to her, speaking in hushed yet serious tones. She nodded in understanding. For as much as she teased Ernst, they were still close friends. She wanted the best for him.

“Hey guys!” Hanschen spoke, putting a hand on Ernst’s shoulder. “Hi, Hanschen.” Anna said. Ernst, on the other hand, was bright red.

“Ernst?” Hanschen asked. “Hello? Earth to Robel?”

Anna hit the table, bringing Ernst back to reality.

“There.” She said, giving Hanschen a nod but then getting distracted herself by the girls at the other end of the table.

“Ernst, do you wanna go eat outside? Get some fresh air.” Hanschen spoke. The other boy nodded excitedly. As they walked out to an old tree, Ernst’s brain started to race. A million different questions that the other boy could ask, and billions of different ways he could respond. He decided to take the looming power away from Hanschen, and make his own first move.

They sat down under the tree. It wasn’t too hot, nor too cold. It was perfect. Ernst felt guilty for, at least in his mind, ruining this perfect day because he couldn’t control his crush on the boy who was sitting close. .

“Hansi?” Ernst choked out. The other boy turned to face him, which would make Ernst’s proceedings ten times harder. Hanschen made a “Hm?” sound as a sign for Ernst to continue.

“I’ve been- I’ve been having dreams about you.” He spit out.

“Oh.” Hanschen made no move of approval or disgust. Ernst wasn’t sure how to feel. It was better than Hanschen leaving him alone under the tree, but he still felt off. It was the indifference that Hanschen displayed that made Ernst so upset. A few moments passed until Hanschen spoke up again.

“What kind?” Ernst contemplated his response, but knew that lying would get him nowhere.

“Dreams that- dreams that we were kissing.” A moment passed, for Hanschen needed to process it. Ernst started to backpedal. “I’m sorry! You probably don’t even like me- and I just needed to tell you.” “That’s why you’ve been acting so weird?” Hanschen half questioned the other.

“Yeah.” Ernst sat motionless against the tree until Hanschen kissed his cheek. It was quick, but sweet. “How are you feeling now?” He asked Ernst as he pulled away, hoping that his would affirm Ernst’s thoughts.“Better, yeah.” Ernst nodded, not sure how to continue.

“I know your dreams were one thing, but could you be happy here with me?” Hanschen spoke, taking Ernst’s hand, trying to make sure that he knew how he felt.

“Yes, of course!” Ernst gave his hand a squeeze, and shared a smile. However, he pulled away. “But, what about Melchior?”

“You know Melchior and I aren’t going out, right?” Hanschen spoke like it was common knowledge.

“Oh, did you- did you two break up?” Ernst was scared that he was pressuring Hanschen to move on too fast, but the other boy gave a chuckle at the question.

“We never dated!”

“You didn’t?” Ernst was shocked at the news. Everyone of his friends had thought them dating.

“Fucking isn’t dating, Ernst.”

“But.. but you held hands in the hallway.” He spoke, trying to get the truth out of Hanschen. There was no way Hanschen didn’t have feeling for Melchior. Not to say that Ernst, wasn’t overjoyed. He was.

“Yeah. But what me and him had wasn’t exclusive. It never was.” Hanschen started to sob a bit, inwardly of course. He had only thought of Ernst like this once before, sure. But Ernst was clearly shaken up over this.

“Why didn’t you tell me!” Ernst sighed. All this time, he could’ve been with him.

“I thought you knew!” He tried to defend himself, hoping that this would breech Ernst’s trust.

“Well, I didn’t!” Ernst wasn’t mad or upset, he just wish that there had been a glowing neon sign over hanschen’s head that said ‘Not Taken.’“If it makes a difference, we’ve stopped.” Ernst’s eye widened at the knowledge. “Turns out, Moritz finally asked him out.” Ernst was wondering why Moritz hadn’t told him yet.

“So that means you’re available now?” Ernst asked after a brief silence.

“I guess it does.” Hanschen gave a smug grin, making eye contact with Ernst.

“Do you wanna..” Hanschen started to ask for a kiss, but Ernst was already there. He had no real frame of reference, but Ernst was certain it was far better than his dreams could ever conjure.

#spring awakening fanfiction #spring awakening #Hanschen Rilow #hanschen x ernst #Ernst Robel #moritz stiefel #moritz x melchior #melchior x moritz #ernst x hanschen #anna x martha #marthanna #hernst #melchiritz #melchior x hanschen #hanschen x melchior

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melchixr · 8 years ago

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McDonald's Paradox

Anon said: hernst on a roadtrip!!! or everyone on a roadtrip!! but its up to u luv u and ur writing thank u <3

IDK if this counts as roadtrip. but i like it and hope you do to!!!! Feat. real life experiences instead it was 30 minutes from my house.

Words: 1057

There are quite a few places where times don’t seem to exist between the hours of ten pm and six am. Walmart, 7/11, a subway car, a park in the suburbs, and McDonalds. That was where Ernst now stood, in line a bit past midnight at a twenty-four hour McDonalds.

It was almost empty besides a couple employers, what he assumed was a crack head in the corner, and Hanschen leaning against him. It was eerily quiet, with the pale fluorescent light bouncing off of their skin, the sticky laminated table tops, and casting the odd glow out into the parking lot outside. Where his old station wagon was parked with Melchior, Moritz, and Ilse still sleeping inside, all on a mattress they had set up in the spacious trunk.

“Don’t you dare fall asleep on me,” Ernst hissed, shaking his boyfriend off of his shoulder. “You woke me up just to drive you and a bunch of sleeping college students here for some goddamn chicken nuggets. You’re not sleeping on me before we even get the order.”

The blond jolted back upright, a gentle, sleepy smile on his face. “Sorry, babe. Can you order for me then?”

“We already ordered, dummy!” Ernst scoffed and looked around to see if anyone was looking at them. They all seemed to be in their own little worlds, not minding whatever anyone else did. Hanschen could suck Ernst off right there in the middle of the room and they’d get the same reaction if he pulled out a gun and shot Ernst.

Absolutely nothing. Maybe glance over their shoulders for a moment. But then immediately go back to whatever they’re doing. It was like all of these little universes somehow collided in this one weird dimension.

And Hanschen seemed to be slipping in and out of this dimension on Ernst’s shoulder. “Baby….” He whined after a few more seconds of waiting. “How much longer until we get to LA?”

“Well we’re in New Mexico right now so it won’t be long now.”

The blond nodded before resting his head back on Ernst’s bony shoulder. He wasn’t all that surprised that he was exhausted. He did sit in the passenger seat and scream all the lyrics to the Beyonce albums he insisted on playing while Ilse drove. Or loudly insisting that they stop to pee every hour.

Maybe he was a bit spoiled. And maybe Ernst played into it. But at this point, he was beyond the point of putting a stop to it. Instead, he just spotting a kiss on Hanschen’s forehead and looked down at the face he knew he wouldn’t be able to say no to.

“Order three-hundred and five?”

Hanschen sprung to life, rushing to the counter in his basketball shorts and gross hoodie from university.

He was suddenly awake now as the pair exited the sort of twilight zone that was the New Mexico McDonalds.

“Are you happy now, dear?” Ernst groaned, already excited about the idea of crawling back into the back seat piled with blankets he and Hanschen used as a ‘bed’.

“Absolutely,” He stated, peering in the back window to see the other three huddled together. “You’re so sweet to me, Ernst.”

Hanschen looked up at him with big blue eyes. They were now far enough away from the resteraunt that the light was no longer any use to them, now leaning on the beat up car. But even though it was pitch dark outside, he could tell Hanschen was gazing at him with the most big, puppy-dog look he was capable of. “You’re the best, Ernie.” He cooed in a sleep dripped voice. “How did I get so lucky to have you?”

“What? Because I drive you to get chicken nuggets?”

“That’s part of it, yeah,” The shorter man muttered and opened the back door of the car. “But also, you’re probably the best person I’ve ever met and you’ve honestly blessed me with your existence.”

A pause hung in the air for a moment before Ernst sighed and watched his boyfriend sit down in the back seat. His legs hung out of the open door as he stared up at Ernst with big dark blue eyes. “You’re gay when you’re sleepy, Hanschen.”

“You’re always gay,” Hanschen replied with a scoff and went on to scarf down the chicken bi-product. “Remember when our first kiss, Ernie? It was the middle of the night like this, with the moon all half full and stars in your eyes? We had snuck out. It was so beautiful,” He mused, demolishing a fistful french fries.

“Fuck, you’re such a sap,” Ernst giggled and hit Hanschen’s side. “Move over, you meme. I’m exhausted from driving your ass around all day.”

Ernst crawled in after Hanschen, closing the door and locking the car behind him. “You think we’ll get in trouble for sleeping in the parking lot.”

“I don’t think anyone cares about what we do. We could massacre everyone in the backseat and they wouldn’t blink.”

Hanschen cast a look over his shoulder. “Okay, Ernie. Tone it down. Get some sleep.”

“You won’t wake me up again in a few hours and make me take you for more food?”

“Get some sleep, Robel.”

Minutes crept by as Hanschen watched Ernst's chest rise and fall. His long legs didn't fit all the way on the seat so he was curled up in a mildly dirty quilt.

Night sounds radiated from outside the car, cicadas and frogs creating a lullaby to rock Ernst to sleep. And with his head resting in Hanschen's lap and brown waves falling around him like sunshine, he fell asleep after only a few moments of laying there.

But Hanschen found himself awake long after he had finished eating. At first, he was mentally going over what they had to do tomorrow. Drive all day through the summer heat until they're so tired they have to stop. Slowly creep closer and closer to California. And sunny beaches and warm clouds in the sky and busy city streets and an apartment they already put half the down payment on and a landlord who thought only three people would be living there.

They were already on their way.

Hanschen woke up the next morning to Melchior shaking the car and his arms wrapped around Ernst's waist, face buried in a mane of wavy brown.

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