#Rewatching the third episode because what else are you doing on a Sunday...
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The wine bottle had the name "Rioja" written on the label. Rioja
#Rewatching the third episode because what else are you doing on a Sunday...#It might be just a coincidence but....#We know that Rio will join them on the trip...#But do we know how much she is involved in everything???#It might be nothing... But what if it is a sign... For something...#But I am also 88% sure that this will lead to nothing. Absolutely meaningless...#Anyway...#agatha all along#rio vidal#agatha harkness#I remember the wandavison time where everything got analyzed the wine bottle was also meaningless...#The wine had also the name cranza on it it is wine from Spain from the year 2016#Could not find anything to the name Reyna#The words “en la propiedad” are written on it as well I can't read the word before them... But these words alone mean “one the property”#Not me analyzing a wine bottle on a Sunday :)#I am connecting the dots here... I am connecting shit...
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So yesterday I started Arcane cause the second season just came out, and a lot of my friends are talking about it. And I must say it is FANTASTIC. The story is incredible, I've heard a lot about how you really sympathize with the characters and it's sometimes hard to decide whose the protagonist and whose the antagonist, and that's very true. The animation is probably the best I've ever seen, only second to the Spiderverse movies (but nobody is surprised by that). I binged six episodes in one night and intend to do the same later.
Now today at school I was thinking about it and on Sunday I was watching Breaking Bad again, which I consider to be the best show I've ever seen, and I still stand by that, and this got me thinking about what my favorite shows are. In middle school it was a toss between Stranger Things and The Office, the latter I saw my dad watching as a kid and thought it was actually about what happened in an office and was bored as hell by it, I hated it. However my friend introduced me to it when I had grown up some and now I absolutely love it, it still is one of my favorite shows and it always will be. Stranger Things is different, I started watching it probably in third grade (much too young) because my dad put it on and I had an instant crush on Eleven's actor Millie Bobby Brown. This has since passed. The show itself is very good I think, there is better out there but to me it brings a great nostalgic feeling while also being fresh and better each season (except season two). Now either in early high school or late middle school my mom introduced me to Community, and I reluctantly obliged because it's my mom and what does she know. Just as always I'm surprised that my mom actually knows what I like and Community is one if not the funniest shows I've ever seen. It declines in quality I feel as it goes but seasons 1-3 is actually some of the best humor in television I've ever seen. I wouldn't say that was ever my favorite show though. Then in high school I watched Peaky Blinders and everything changed, this show is actually amazing. Ignore all the sigma and alpha edits of Thomas Shelby because he's actually a very well-written character, and the period sets and acting of the show is just as good. I watched it twice and really should rewatch it sometime soon (maybe after Arcane). Then the magnum opus of television, I'm glad I waited this long to start it because I don't know if I would understand it like I do now: Breaking Bad. I watched the first two episodes, which are a slow start I admit, but still not bad whatsoever, and got bored. I picked it up a few months later and powered through and my god was it the best decision of my life. I could talk about this show for hours, everyone should watch it. It has the best written characters I've seen in really any media out there, and acting is on the same level. Watch it. That's the best show I've seen. But I've been looking at my MacBook background for a bit, it's a moving wallpaper of fish swimming through a coral reef, and it calms me so much from the stress of everything around me, from my self consciousness, and from the stress from school. So I realized that though it may not be the best show I've ever seen, my true favorite show is Planet Earth. Rather Planet Earth Two, because holy shit they upgrade everything in that one. It really does give me a sense of calming nothing else can, it's like I am transported from the stupid state I live in to the plains of Africa, or to the Ice of Antarctica. It makes me realize I would rather be anywhere and doing anything else than air at my computer writing about what happened in the Texas Revolution.
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Previously on Tangled...
I learned that the movie was getting a show, and I saw the animation style and saw her hair and thought “Well, that’s curious, and looks cute, but it’s going to be for kids, clearly, so I probably won’t watch it. Still, it’s neat that they’re doing 2D-animated cartoons for their movies, especially if they’re getting the cast, that’s somewhat nostalgic.”
Then I saw pictures of Cassandra and went “Oh no” because I was worried they were going to lure me in with this dazzling swordfighter-friend who would probably be the subject of some slash-ship jokes before being paired off with some guy who didn’t deserve her...or might deserve her.
Then I saw some early reviews coming in that complained about how the show didn’t take trauma seriously, and how they didn’t like the way Rapunzel’s father was portrayed. I didn’t watch the show myself, but these reviews steered me away: “I’m not going to get involved,” I said. The most I did was explain to anyone who complained “But heR hAir wAS cuT oFF” and say “Yeah, the first preview addresses that, I’m sure there’s a reason.”
Then, I was down south at my grandmother’s house for Easter. I took a break and went upstairs while everyone else was socializing and just turned on the TV, checked the guide...and saw that “Tangled the Series” was on. So I went to see what was going on, and the episode was “Challenge of the Brave”. I watched and was excited to see Cassandra, and I grew frustrated as I saw Rapunzel effortlessly defeating her in the contest. I will always prefer hard work and practice to innate skill in my stories, so I was on the verge of brushing it off...but then Cassandra let loose with that speech. She unleashed frustration at Rapunzel because the privileged princess could afford to stroll down here and goof off while Cassandra was fighting to push ahead in life, and that stunned me. Here was this speech, in a children’s show.
Then came a preview for “Cassandra v. Eugene”, premiering next (I think), and so I decided to watch that episode. And I watched it, and I loved it because Rapunzel was hilarious and Cassandra and Eugene had to bond and she had a halberd, and I blinked at the “’Cobra-Man’? Haha, no...” line because was that deliberate, and hearing Ron Perlman back as the Stabbingtons was just great...and so I decided that I would have to watch the show from the start.
So I did. When I returned to my apartment in the north, I watched the show. Start to finish. And yeah, I made the jokes about Cass and Rapunzel--but the fact that she called her “Raps” just made the whole thing sweet. And I remember being frustrated for weeks because “Return of Strongbow” was the latest episode for ages. It might have just been a two-week deal, but you know, when you just caught up with a show and spent ten minutes at most between episodes, three days until the next premiere is a lifetime.
By then, I was wholly on board. Episode after episode, I watched them. And sometimes rewatched them. When “Under Raps” came out, I saw the preview and reasoned that Cass was probably threatening this new “boyfriend” she was promised--something that drove me and several other fans nuts, but hey, let’s get it over with--and then the episode just pulled the rug out from under me by bypassing the notion altogether, and from that moment onward, I viewed Cass--legitimately--as a lesbian character in a Disney cartoon. More about that later, and the disappointment that slowly built as, once again, censors and standards diminished the influence...but her existence is still there.
I read a novel where Cass and Raps bonded and got married. I spent my birthday crying over the death of a cartoon frog’s mother. I watched a happy holiday special turn into a horrific moral dilemma that ended with a villain’s origin story, and spent the rest of the season stressing about when the hammers would drop.
I saw shadowy figures step into the sunlight, saw the familiar trend of a Quality Animated Show being shoved into the dark corners of If You Watch It You Watch It. I went to my parents’ house and got up early on a Sunday morning to watch Max and Eugene break out of a prison barge live on TV, after countless months of leaving our characters stranded on a mysterious island with an uncomfortably realistic Idol of Addiction--crowned by a declaration of love from Rapunzel in a stunningly-animated sequence. I watched Cassandra murder two spirits when she thought Rapunzel was lost forever, I made gifs, gifs, and more gifs, I struggled to try and make music videos (thanks for nothing, software), and I speculated and debated in ways I hadn’t done since Korra. I waited with dread for the spoilers in certain scripts to be inflicted upon Cassandra, and felt my jaw drop as they played out an almost-romantic Cassunzel AU fanfic on the screen of canon. I cracked up at endless “Seal” puns, marveled at Eugene’s open shirt, found myself rooting for Lance and Adira, and realized with horror that my favorite character was going to turn to villainy--and when she did, it broke so much of the show.
I would be lying if I said that the third season is my favorite (right now). Honestly, it’s been my least favorite, but the reason why is because these characters became real to me...again, real in ways that I haven’t experienced in ages. This third season has been filled with so much hardship for them, and for the first time since Avatar: the Last Airbender, I’m truly dreading if my beloved protagonists are going to have a happy ending. Well, one in particular, because I know there’s a short (that I still haven’t watched!) where Rapunzel and Eugene tie the knot...but of course, Cassandra isn’t there. And I suppose we all know the reason for it.
But Cassandra deserves a life of happiness, and so that’s why I await tomorrow with dread and anxiety: because what if it’s not worth it?
But this show has done things that have surprised me and comforted me. Eden promised us at the end of Season Two to hold on and stay calm. Mandy’s final script teaser had some...very spoilerific dialogue, with some very interesting word choices.
And tomorrow, we’re going to see them play out.
So, bring it on, Rapunzel’s Tangled Adventure. I knew you before you bore that name, and hopefully, I’ll be purchasing your full boxset and lending it out to anyone who wants it, because you’ve been one of the Best Shows I’ve seen. Despite my worries, despite your missteps, despite the terrible word choice of certain episode titles and certain dialogue options because no that doesn’t make them that at all, you’ve delivered time and time again on mature and morally-grounded themes and speeches...whether it’s Rapunzel promising a frightened teen that he can do the right thing or yelling at spirits that she won’t let her fears hurt the people she loves, or Eugene assuring Rapunzel that she can make the right decisions and promising to be there for her, or Cassandra calling out class and privilege in an attention-grabbing speech, the show’s done its job.
So thank you to the cast and crew of this magnificent saga. Whatever happens next, however I feel tomorrow...you brought me joy and strength and passion and gave me strength through hard times.
Thank you.
#tangled the series#rapunzel's tangled adventure#tangled#swan watches tangled#for the last time#...well actually there's the short...#...but...#tangled spoilers#long post
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Vengence on Gallifrey
Welcome back, friends. We’re meeting up sooner than we usually do! I could get used to the idea of a new episode every Wednesday and Sunday. Wouldn’t that be swanky? In the time since part one of "Spyfall," there has been a lot of speculation and theories about what would be in store for part two. How many of your fan predictions came true? I know a couple of mine did. But let’s not get ahead of ourselves.
Before part two aired, I revisited part one. I was curious to review O’s storyline in light of the big reveal. Would I notice any nods or giveaways to his being the Master a second time around? The answer is basically, no. Other than the Master’s reaction of "ridiculous," to the inside of the TARDIS, there’s not much telegraphing to be had. I did, however, notice some things that seem head-slappingly stupid upon a second viewing.
My pal Steve compared the episode to "Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker," in that it moves so fast that you don’t have enough time to realise how stupid it actually is. One of those things I noticed the second time around was the big glass box in the middle of O’s home. My mind had kind of glazed over by that point that I never questioned how stupid it was that he would have a spring-loaded glass box in his ceiling. Now, I’m only human, but the Doctor isn’t. Why didn’t that seem weird to her that he would have a trap hanging from the ceiling? It made me think of Troll 2 when the dad walks over and grabs a fire extinguisher conveniently propped against the house. Why was it there? Because the plot demanded it.
Despite this, there is one thing I feel deserves saying. As much as I liked "Kerblam!" "The Witchfinders," or "It Takes You Away," I haven’t watched any of them since they first aired. I haven’t watched any of season 11 since my initial viewing. Regardless of any plotholes I found, I wanted to rewatch Spyfall. And I think that goes to show that despite various failings on Chris Chibnall’s behalf, he’s got me watching the show again! What then is different?
My first response would be that the stakes are higher this time around. A lot of that has to do with the fact that the Master is back. Regardless of how overused he may or may not be in the new series, their relationship has gravity. As an agent of chaos, the Master ups the tension as we have a history with him. Like with the Dalek in "Resolution," he lends a familiar element that this new era deeply needed. In these past few days, I was truly worried about how our friends were going to get out of this mess. I haven’t felt that way about Doctor Who in a long time.
When we last saw our heroes, the Doctor had been transported to the brain realm and the companions were about to crash on a plane. Through a bit of time travel, the Doctor saves the day via phone app, thus continuing the trend of the Doctor messing with Ryan’s phone. At least the dude got to keep his data this time. I found the whole sequence with the Doctor making plaques and laminating belaboured the point a bit, but it was cute.
We learn that the Doctor is walking around in some sort of synaptic realm. She meets Ada Lovelace who seems to think it's her own mind, but that was her best guess. I would complain that it was a weird design if it was a mind, but then I remember "The Invisible Enemy," and realise how much worse it could have looked! According to Ada, she’s been visiting this place since she was a wee bairn. She seems rather cool about the whole thing but is perplexed to see the Doctor.
The two flash into Ada’s timeline of 1834, where the Doctor has found herself at a steampunk convention. I found some of the steam-powered devices like the grenade to be a bit moronic. It was so unbelievable that my initial reaction was that she was in some sort of alternate history. But no, it’s just goofy. The Master discovers the Doctor survived and goes to finish the job. Before the episode, I was thinking "I hope they show the inside of his TARDIS." Turns out they already had. I guess it’s the same size on the inside. I had kind of expected it to be like Clara and Me’s TARDIS in that the diner was just part of the facade with the real bit hidden away. But no, his console is right there in the main room. Weird. Also, remember when chameleon circuits used to make TARDISes look inconspicuous? The biggest thing we ever saw it do was when the Master’s TARDIS became a truck. The coolest camouflage still goes to my man Professor Chronotis’ TARDIS in Shada. It was just a door along a wall. How cool is that? Not complaining, merely lamenting the loss of simplicity.
From within the Master’s TARDIS we see Barton confront the Master. The conversation between these two really only serves to show Barton as alive, and establish the power structure which is that the Master is in charge, which we already knew. It also establishes the existence of a sculpture that looks like something a third-year art student might have half-assed while hungover. Barton goes to intercept the companions, while the Master takes care of the Doctor. He makes a grand entrance with his tissue compression device doling out murder without reason. Did anyone else wonder why the device seemed not only to shrink people but also to turn them stiff like plastic or wood? I suppose compacting material like that could increase rigidity, but it was an odd choice.
To get the Master to stop killing people, the Doctor placates his ego by getting on her knees and calling him Master. It was, for lack of a better word- hot. Ada shoots the Master with a steam-powered gun and they get away. This was more of Chibnall’s weird relationship with guns. The Doctor says to Ada that she doesn’t approve, but the second Ada uses a grenade the Doctor is like "Hell yeah, this is my bad bitch Ada! Represent!" It’s like in "The Ghost Monument," when she hated the use of guns against a group of emotionless robots and then used a bomb to take out the same group of emotionless robots. It’s almost as though it’s not the killing the Doctor hates, it’s the inefficiency of the whole thing. "Mate, use bombs, way more effective!" Okay, Chris.
In the last five minutes of part one, I wasn’t sure if Sacha Dhawan was going to be a good Master or not. I was worried he was going to be too flamboyant, but the second he hits the screen in part two, it’s as though he had always been in the role. I really love him and Jodie Whittaker’s chemistry. It’s great to see her Doctor faced with someone truly evil, and I feel as though it’s given her a lot to work with. Watching the two of them verbally spar is nothing short of delightful.
Barton comes up empty-handed in his search for the companions, which is no sweat off his back as he is Mr Tech Empire. After a little bit of finagling with the internet, their faces are soon posted everywhere as wanted criminals. Exactly like in "The Sound of Drums," they’re going to have to go off the grid. They even take refuge in a construction site! Doing so gives them a bit of downtime to talk and regroup. In a moment of clarity, it dons on them that they don’t really know the Doctor all that well. They decide that after all is said and done, they’re going to have a talk with the Doctor. Like many people, I was hoping that they would visit this concept, as series eleven made them seem a little too keen. It was a welcome bit of character development.
Another thing I love about this scene is that Graham isn’t annoying in it. "But Natalie," you say, "I thought you loved Graham!" And you would be right, I do love Graham. But I feel like it’s worth pointing out that they didn’t ruin him. Usually with a lot of shows and movies, if something is good or popular with fans, the tendency is to overdo it. This is the same lovable dude from the previous series and I feel that should be acknowledged. One of the things I really admire about Chris Chibnall is that he really seems to know his own character’s voices. One of my biggest issues with Clara Oswald is that her personality was all over the board. We don’t get that here.
Having travelled with the Doctor for a while now, the companions decide to carry on like she would have them do. They still have their spy gear and like exploding cufflinks and Graham’s laser shoes, and their timing couldn’t have been more perfect as the baddies from part one show up. Sadly, they’re not the Voord as me and many others had hoped. They’re a species known as the Kasaavin. It’s a name that’s about as inspired as Ranskoor Av Kolos, and that is not a compliment. It’s simply a very forgettable name. I dunno what it is, but I really hate the way Chris Chibnall names stuff. He’s willing to do groan-inducing puns like "Arachnids in the UK," or "Dinosaurs on a Spaceship," but then decides to reign it in with "Resolution," despite the naming convention established in previous Dalek stories like "Revelation of the Daleks," or "Remembrance of the Daleks." Though I suppose in his defence, "Resolution," is about a singular Dalek. Either way, Graham’s laser shoes save the day. It’s ridiculous, but unlike the Master, it is a compliment when I say it.
The Doctor has now regrouped with Ada Lovelace and Charles Babbage. After a bit of fangirling on her part, she goes into Doctor brain mode. She pieces together that the multiple maps of the earth are, like I had guessed, different points in time. The aliens are spying on important people throughout time, for some reason that still makes zero sense to me. Why would they care about the Earth’s technology? Wouldn’t their computers completely best our technology? What threat could humans pose to them? I thought their sights were set on taking over the universe, but now it appears their sites are set on one planet’s technology. I guess you’ve got to start somewhere.
The Doctor surmises that the Kasaavin must have difficulty keeping their form in our universe, thus a need for a machine that keeps them stable. This, of course, is the bad art student sculpture we saw in the Master’s TARDIS which has now found its way into Charles Babbage’s study. This must have been too close to the truth as at this moment a Kasaavin shows up. The Doctor uses this as an opportunity to hitch a ride off of the Kasaavin’s energy surge in hopes to end up back in the present day. As she does, Ada grabs her hand and is transported as well. Instead of 2020, they end up in the year 1943 during a Nazi blitz on Paris. Literally, the first person they encounter is another historical figure- Noor Inayat Khan. That’s gotta be some kind of record for the show- three historical figures in one episode.
After establishing that they aren’t Nazis, the Doctor and Ada hide in the safety of Noor’s home. However, it is then that the Master shows up in full Nazi regalia and orders a team of Nazi soldiers to fire into the floor and leaves. I, like many of you, was immediately confused. The Nazis weren’t known to ally themselves with people of the Master’s current complexion. However, we learn that by using a series of perception filters, the Master has disguised himself as white, which makes sense in relation to the show. We discover the Doctor and Ada narrowly averted death as they were, in fact, hiding in the floor.
On the other end of things, Graham, Ryan, and Yaz use being under surveillance to draw Barton’s people into a trap. Using Graham’s laser shoes, they steal a vehicle and head to stop Barton. Speaking of Barton, we’re treated to a deliciously dark scene between him and his mother. It was pretty obvious that the woman strapped to a chair in his bad guy lair had to be his mother, but that didn’t make it any less funny. This guy is such a piece of work that not even his mother likes him. He tells her that she is to be the first person to be subjected to his grand scheme. After being taken over by blue electricity, she appears to die. What a dick.
Back in Paris, the Doctor realises Noor is a British spy. Using her telegraph, the Doctor baits the Master by tapping out four beats- the heartbeat of a Time Lord. Unable to resist, the Master taps four beats in response to the Doctor. What happened next was one of the coolest things I’ve seen on Doctor Who in a while. The Doctor and the Master make contact telepathically, something of which hasn’t been seen in the show for years. I quite literally threw my hands up into the air with joy. Kudos to Chris Chibnall for giving me the nerd feels.
The Doctor and the Master meet up atop the Eifel Tower where they have a rather intimate conversation. We find out it was the Master who killed C in the previous episode. So yes, they did waste Stephen Fry, which officially makes me a disappoint. The Doctor deduces that the Master isn’t actually in control of the Kasaavin. Instead, the Master has merely allied himself with them, claiming to have given them a broader scope of vision. I’m not exactly sure how going from wanting to take over the universe to taking over a small planet is a broadening in scope, but stop asking questions and watch the show.
Now, remember how I just gave kudos to Chris Chibnall? Well, I am going to have to take those back. In an attempt to delay the Master, the Doctor gives him away to the Nazis. She makes them think he is a British spy and directs them to their location. However, not only does she do this, but she also disables his perception filters. So effectively, the Doctor, a white woman, gives up a brown man to the Nazis. It wasn’t enough to make them think he’s a spy, they had to also see that he had brown skin. I was honestly a bit disgusted by this. How would they even recognise him as the same guy they were told was a spy? They’re going to arrive and find a person of colour in a Nazi uniform and not know who he was. Jesus Christ, Chibnall.
The Doctor uses the Master’s TARDIS to get back to the present time, just in time to find Barton unrolling his big plan. He goes on a long speech about how we give all of our information to corporations and how we should watch who we allow to pry into our privacy. It’s the social media equivalent of "Don’t blink." It’s a very effective bit of writing on par with one of Steven Moffat’s better speeches. It’s a shame it was preceded by the Doctor selling the Master out to Nazis.
So what’s the big plan? Well, remember the spy woman in part one whose DNA had been rewritten? And remember how Barton was only 93% human? It turns out that the Kasaavin plan to rewrite the DNA of the human race and turn us into hard drives by storing information within our DNA. They do so by using our smartphones and tablets against us. In the same arc of blue electricity as Mother Barton, people all over the world begin to be assimilated. During this entire press conference scene, I’m not sure if any of the actors in the audience were given proper direction as they have the most benign faces throughout most of this. Barton, whose speech went from zero to megalomaniacal in the first few seconds, should have sent up red flags across the room, but instead, they were as serene as cows. It was bizarre.
That was it, that was the big plan. Turn people into hard drives. I think? I had to ask a few of my friends what they thought it was supposed to be because I was worried I had missed something. Were they trying to take over the bodies of humans so they could have corporeal form? If so, then why say they wanted to store data in our DNA? Why do they need so much data storage anyway? Have they got a huge stash of hentai in their universe? Were they torrenting all of Doctor Who? Seriously, I do not understand their motivation or their methods. But honestly, I hardly care, because the real star of the show is the Master.
Having waited 77 years, the Master shows up just in time to be kind of late to the show. Like, he didn’t even buy a gun in that time. I do however look forward to the Big Finish audios pertaining to that era of his life. However, in the meantime, the Doctor took it upon herself to put a bug in the Kasaavin’s system which negates their mission and reverses the conversion. She informs the Kasaavin that the Master had planned to double-cross them. As they depart from our universe, they take the Master with them, but not before he mentions to the Doctor that Gallifrey was destroyed.
After getting Ada and Noor to their respective timelines, the Doctor goes to see Gallifrey for herself. Sure enough, the once-great Time Lord society has been raised to the ground. It’s a powerful bit of acting on Jodie Whittaker’s behalf. Devastated, the Doctor returns to the TARDIS only to be greeted by a hologram of the Master telling her it was him that did it, as a sort of act of punishment or vengeance. This is a much needed source of motivation for the Master’s current rage, considering how much of a departure it is from Missy’s redemption arc. Remember the timeless child storyline I’ve been dreading? Well, I’m genuinely surprised to be sitting here today to tell you that it has piqued my interest. Having something to do with the founders of Time Lord society, Rassilon and Omega, the implication is that their legend is based upon a lie, thus the Master’s final warning to the Doctor at the end of part one.
So who is the timeless child? Well, I am relieved to say I don’t think it’s the Doctor. My wildest guess is that she was some sort of person that didn’t experience time like the rest of us and was killed to harness that power. Think Rusty Venture powering his dream machine with the heart of an orphan. Like I said, my wildest guess. The biggest takeaway from all of this is that I’m sitting here speculating about Doctor Who. With Moffat’s plotlines oftentimes leading nowhere interesting, I had grown wary of speculation. Why wonder what was next when it was most likely something disappointing? It’s nice to feel intrigued by Doctor Who again.
Upon returning to her fam, the Doctor is distant and quiet. The companions can tell something is up, but as they decided earlier, they needed to have a talk with the Doctor. The Doctor concedes and tells them the basics- she’s a Time Lord, she’s from Gallifrey, she can regenerate her body, the Master was her friend. This bit of truth on her behalf seems to please the trio as they don’t press the issue further. The Doctor throws the TARDIS into gear and we’re left lingering on her face for a moment before the episode ends.
Afterwards, my wife and boyfriend and I sat in silence. As the biggest Whovian in the house, I think they were waiting for my reaction. And in some ways, I think I was too. I really enjoyed the episode, I did. But I had my issues, which I’ve listed extensively above. My main qualms at that time were of structure. Much like the first episode, this one was clunky. The pacing was definitely better than last time, but still had issues. But otherwise, I needed to think about what I had just seen. I liked the anti-fascism angle, save for the Doctor selling out the Master to the Nazis. And there were a lot of great callbacks to classic Who. My wife had checked out at the DNA storage bit because she’s a giant nerd and was feeling nitpicky about the science in a science fiction show. But it was Duncan whose comments I think were the most on point. He told me that he, as a casual viewer, was lost throughout much of the episode. For him, a little bit of explanation peppered throughout the episode would have gone a long way.
One of the most persistent flaws in classic Doctor Who is that oftentimes they would explain what was happening within the final episode of a story, leaving you in the dark for the first few episodes. In the same way, Spyfall had left him feeling lost. I even said it recently that I am not the kind of fan Doctor Who needs to please. I will watch the show regardless of its quality. If someone as fanatical as myself was feeling confused, imagine how my boyfriend felt. It is, as he said, why people start tuning out. The show is on course to what may possibly be one of it’s best seasons in years. I’m hoping that the next few episodes give us a bit of breathing room before throwing us back into the deep end.
#doctor who#Jodie Whittaker#Thirteenth Doctor#Sacha Dhawan#The Master#Graham O'Brien#Ryan Sinclair#yasmine khan#yaz#spyfall#gallifrey#ada lovelace#noor inyat khan#charles babbage#kasaavin#Time and Time Again
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Get to know me tag
I was tagged by @kpopishilarious
1. Nickname: I don’t really have any nicknames but sometimes I get called Sams (which is a shortening of my name and also a kind of fish)
2. Gender: female
3. Star sign: Scorpio
4. Height: about 170 cm ( which is 5'6 i think)
5. Time: 00:21
6. Birthday: November 7, 2002
7. Favourite bands (non kpop): I used to be a big fan of 1D ,5SOS and other boybands but now the phase is over and I like Artic Monkeys, The Gorillaz and some songs from P!ATD i don’t really consider them or any other groups my favorites tho
8. Favourite solo artist: don’t know whether I can choose from kpop artists but I just LOVE Sunmi
9. Song stuck in your head: The songs literally change every 5 minutes or so but for the first time ever CLC’s Black Dress is on my mind. Bbom Bbom by Momoland and Black Suit are also songs that are often stuck in my mind
10. Last movie watched: Yesterday I watched the third Maze Runner at the cinema i love the books and I actually cried when Newt died i’m not even surprised about that
11. Last show watched: Avatar: The Last Airbender!!!! Yesterday I started rewatching it (because I forgot that it’s just so good) and it’s also the reaaon why I’m staying up tonight
12. When did i create my blog: I actually have no idea
13. What do i post: mostly kpop but sometimes something else that I think is worth
14. Last thing i googled: how many episodes are in every avatar season
15. Do you have other blogs: yes but I don’t use them
16. Do you get asks: nope and I’m not surprised or sad about that
17. Why did you choose your url: sam are the first 3 three letters of my name, mill is from miller because i thought that was the closest english surname to mine before I changed it (which was mālere btw) and 7 is just my lucky number i just wanted to fit in the english society
18. Following: 1376 and that is a loooottttt
19. Followers: ehh about 70
20. Favourite colour(s): I’m not sure. I like black and crimson and army green and pastel and blue and green and tiel and colors in general are very nice
21. Average hours of sleep: On school days abot 6-7 but in saturdays and sundays about 9
22. Lucky number: 7
23. Instruments: I played the piano for 6 years and that’s about it
24. What am i wearing: A baggy shirt and underpants because that’s how I sleep
25. How many blankets do i sleep with: 1
26. Dream job: NO.FUCKING.IDEA. which is very bad cause I have to choose in like 3 months
27. Dream trip: So many amazing places. Maybe Asia or America because the food
28. Favourite food: too many to choose from
29. Nationality: Latvian
30. Favourite song now: Too.Many.
Tagging: @ksuhio and @itsmeflora
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Sebastian: 2 + 38; Pete: 5 + 45; Margot: 25; Lucy: 26; Sara Grace: 13; Adelaide: 50? (...I apologize if this is just too many questions.)
oc questions meme that i totally didn’t forget about (except for how i kinda did, but mostly i was just lazy about typing up my longhand from saturday night)
SEBASTIAN2: What's a movie your character really, really doesn't enjoy?
Pretty much any and all horror is probably going to be on Seb’s, “can we please not” list, because he squicks really easily and does not have a good gag reflex when it comes to movies. He also gets emotionally affected and upset really easily, and arguably has an even worse gag reflex when that gets involved.
Like, seriously, even Shaun of the Dead is kinda pushing it, for him
That said? Of the Three Flavours Cornetto movies, the one that really sicks him out is The World’s End, not because the movie itself is that gross, but because he can’t help identifying in really self-loathing ways with Gary King.
So, watching Gary go on his increasingly destructive quest to drink a pint in each of the twelve pubs along Newton Haven’s Golden Mile, even while the world is going to sci-fi Hell and all his old friends are getting really upset with him, makes Seb get unhappy, then distressed, and then violently ill in the nearest wastebasket.
That being said, Requiem for a Dream gets a very special mention on his list because, unfortunately for him, his “it’s complicated” is a hipster fuck who went to film school and thinks it’s cool to brag about having seen RFAD more than once.
(I mean? It is an actual facts accomplishment, Todd, but calm down. Just because it’s an accomplishment doesn’t mean that it’s one that you should brag about, because it mostly makes people think you’re kind of an asshole.
……Which isn’t unfair, bc Todd is kind of an asshole, and unlike Pete, he isn’t self-aware about it, buuuut that’s another matter.)
Either way, Todd being one of Seb’s favorite people means that Seb first had to see RFAD once. To the surprise of no one but Todd (but in fairness, this was still early into their friendship), Seb got violently ill in the nearest wastebasket, cried, and wasn’t impressed when Todd thought him saying, “The horror, the horror” was a, “trying to cope with the movie through grim humor”-style joke based on how, earlier that night, Todd had been complaining about having to read Heart of Darkness for a lit class.
(I mean, it was a Heart of Darkness reference, but…… no, Seb was being completely serious about it. If they hadn’t brought up Heart of Darkness earlier, he would’ve expressed it in some other way, but that was what he came up with in the moment.)
Then, Seb had to see it again, even though once was really more than enough. He could’ve opted out, sure, but unfortunately, there isn’t a lot that he wouldn’t do for the people he loves, which makes him kind of a doormat sometimes, and in this instance, meant that he was easily swayed by Todd promising him that maybe he’d make it through without getting sick this time, since he already knew what was going to happen
(not quite) spoilers: ……Noooot really, nope. If anything, the rewatch made things even worse for Seb.
Then, they tried a third time, and that was the last time Seb ever attempted to sit through the whole thing, largely because Todd got it through his head that…… okay, no, this isn’t a one-time thing, or a coincidence, or anything like that. Seb will always get physically ill at RFAD and when that happens, he definitely ends up puking. So, after the third time, Todd finally quit trying to make Seb sit through it with him.
38: Your character's general opinion on kids. What if they were to have a kid? What if something happened and someone had a kid and your character was the only one who could take care of that child?
In general, Seb likes kids a lot and, when he’s doing okay, he gets along with them pretty well. There are several reasons why he is one of his seven-year-old niece’s favorite uncles, and one of them is that he’s genuinely better than either of his brothers at getting on Marie’s level without either condescending to her, or treating her like a tiny adult just because she’s intellectually gifted.
(To be fair to Max and Ambrose, they try their best — especially Max since, y’know, Marie is his daughter and he is such a dorky, “proud of everything his kid does, ever” dad — but both of them have trouble finding the balance here, which is also fair because lbr? It’s a difficult balance to find, much less maintain.)
The problem is that Seb is not always doing okay. More often than not, he’s way more likely to be Not Okay, and when he’s Not Okay, one of his first impulses is to withdraw from absolutely everyone.
For most of Marie’s life thus far, that has also tended to involve him getting intoxicated — and increasingly, it was, “intoxicated to the point where, at best, it should be termed, ‘getting really fucked up’; and at worst, he would probably be dead if not for his shiny mutant healing factor” — which made him actively avoid being around her, for a laundry list of reasons, including but not limited to:
“What if something happens and I get left alone with her, she could get hurt”
“What if something happens, I get left alone with her, and something happens to me, so she has to watch that and she now doesn’t have a guardian”
“What if I finally run out of extra lives around her, because as someone who has discovered the corpse of someone who died by overdose, I wouldn’t wish that on anyone, especially not her and especially not when she’s so young; even if she might not remember her, finding someone’s corpse will fuck you up and she doesn’t need that in her life”
(—he said, feeling bad about all the broken promises that this usually involved, but also feeling like breaking them and disappointing her was better than potentially dying in some place where his tiny niece could find him, like?
Dying itself? Didn’t sound too bad or like that much of a problem. But dying where the sight of his corpse could potentially traumatize Marie? That would be Terrible.)
“What if I can’t fake like I’m sober well enough for her to believe it — I mean, Max and Linda probably wouldn’t believe it even if I were, but if I’m so obviously not-sober that even Marie gets it, what if she sees it and blames herself for it? She’s gifted but she’s still a kid, and she’s a sensitive kid, and even adults have trouble understanding when something about a person they love being a fuck-up isn’t their fault”
and, “I don’t want her to see me like that, she’s probably one of the only people on the planet who still doesn’t think I’m totally worthless”
(—he said while: 1. not getting it that none of the people who are saved as favorites on his phone — i.e., a grand total of 14 contacts, at that point, out of 1,000+
[though that number includes things like favorite takeout places and NYU campus security, even though he hasn’t been an NYU student since May 2007 and has changed his phone multiple freaking times since then, and even given that he has had good luck with SIM cards, there is no reason for him to still have the number for NYU campus security]
—just…… yeah. None of the people he cares about most actually think that he’s completely worthless. He is literally the only person whom he deals with on a regular basis who thinks that;
and 2. ……uh, yeah, no. Cool intentions, Seb, but at this point, your niece had definitely seen you in a state that you would describe as, “like that.” She’d even seen you, “like that” more than once.
Maybe Marie didn’t entirely get it or understand what was going on — and bc she was a grand total of five when you went to rehab, the initial explanation that she would’ve gotten out of her parents would’ve been something like, “Uncle Bastian is very sick right now, and he’s going to be okay, but he had to go away to see the doctors who have special training to help him get better”
—but she still definitely saw you, “like that.”
And then, a few days before Christmas 2014, Marie got to see him while he was, courtesy of some regrettable heat of the moment decision-making, cold turkey detoxing because she had been promised a playdate, and Seb was cognizant enough to do that if Max and Marie came to his place instead (on the plus: six dogs), and Pete was free to come over as chaperone (since Max trusts him, but not Todd or Margot)
And that playdate did involve an attempt at explaining an idea that even adults sometimes have trouble with, in a way that a six-year-old would understand, but oddly enough, the concept had to do with why pit bulls have a bad reputation that they do not deserve, and why some people are assholes who abuse their dogs
The concept of, “Uncle Bastian is sick right now because he decided to recommit himself to sobriety and broke up with his latest bad idea, but instead of trying to do this a bit more responsibly — i.e., talking to a doctor and getting weaned off of everything safely — he just got rid of all of his pills, alcohol, and assorted paraphernalia, and didn’t remember why this might’ve been a bad way to handle things until he started getting sick at church on Sunday morning”?
Like, yeah, they had to change the wording a bit, but that made perfect sense to Marie
(—which her uncle is really not proud of, since the fact that she understands this as well as she does at her age is pretty much entirely his fault, but…… it’s not like he can undo any of his decisions here)
(nor can anybody else undo theirs, because none of my mutants are allowed to have time travel powers, period.
Any “minor time manipulation” is exclusively limited to shit like, “it’s actually enhanced speed that goes so fast that they essentially enter bullet-time, or have GOTTA GO FAST!! super-moments, like the Days of Future Past and X-Men: Apocalypse movies did with their whitewashed Quicksilver, or like the one bit of the “Three Hundred Big Boys” episode of classic Futurama, where Fry drinks so much coffee that he speeds up into a magical super-fast state of calm or something)”
But they are not actually examples of, “time manipulation,” much less time travel, because time travel powers are silly and they too easily either destroy all semblance of continuity or turn into hella over-powered game-breakers that violate the agency of literally everyone who isn’t using them
—or, worse, cause all kinds of moral and ethical dilemmas like, “well, if Superman can turn back time by flying really fast around the Earth because that makes sense, then why doesn’t he just go back and kill Hitler? why is it more morally defensible for him to let the Holocaust happen than not?”
—and because frankly, I don’t want to deal with that, so, no one in my universe gets to have any legitimate time travel or time manipulation-related powers, end of discussion
But anyway, I was saying)
Right. So, Marie generally understood the concept of, “so, your uncle was once more abusing his substances of choice for a sustained period of time, but now he isn’t, and rather than doing the safe thing, he did the quick thing based on heat of the moment, emotional decision-making, which involves him being sick for several days”
Animal abuse, on the other hand, did not make any sense to her at all
But that’s an entirely different matter and I’m so far off the point right now that it’s not even funny.
BACK ON THE ORIGINAL, ORIGINAL TOPIC
……so, yeah, uh.
Seb has some hangups about being around kids, but they mostly involve, “oh my god, I don’t have my life together at all and what if I am actively detrimental to the well-being of the kid(s)” — and for all some of this is an understandable fear for him to have, based on a lot of precedent from him…… uh?
Other parts of it are legitimate nonsense, based in a potent mix of hella self-loathing, hella bullheaded refusal to forgive himself for just about anything, hella letting his imagination get the better of him and rationalizing justifications for this without realizing that they’re not as accurate to reality as he thinks, and holy unrecognized generalized anxiety disorder, batman
At the moment, he’s fine with the only kids who are actually his being his six dogs, and has given essentially no thought to ever being a parent to human children, partly because he assumes that it won’t ever happen (bc he can’t see anyone wanting to have kids with him, and feels like, “it wouldn’t be fair on the kids to stick them with me, like that’s just unconscionable”), and partly because what little thought he has given the idea? Has been deeply terrifying
He’s marginally less terrified of something happening to Max and Linda, at least from a practical standpoint, because Seb knows that custody of Marie goes to his and Max’s parents, first, should anything happen to both of Marie’s parents
Like, he doesn’t WANT anything to happen to either his brother or his sister-in-law, much less both of them, and he might not admit it to himself, but if something happened to Max, Seb would be a Mess about it.
But at the same time, he could cope with it better because as much as he loves Marie, he wouldn’t be her legal guardian and she’d be in the competent, caring hands of her grandparents
If it ever happened that he wound up with custody of her and any potential future siblings she ends up with…… well.
There are three major possibilities for why that might happen: 1. Seb somehow redeemed himself to Max and Linda so much that the part where he’s Marie’s godfather became more than a ceremonial thing, and he actually did get switched to the person who gets custody of Marie if anything happens to both of her parents;
2. Abe and Marceline both died, and Seb had redeemed himself to Max and Linda enough to be the first-alternate to his and Max’s parents on the, “who gets custody of Marie” hierarchy;
or 3. Whether he redeemed himself or not, nothing was actually made official, but everybody else died or couldn’t be contacted (or is kind of stuck in mutant supermax, awaiting trial for various charges of fraud, conspiracy, bribery, election-related tampering, rape, sexual assault, torture, murder, illicit use of metahuman abilities, tax evasion, and possibly treason, as Conrad eventually will be), so Seb ends up as Marie’s guardian by default
Regardless of the situation here, uh. His first reaction is going to be to make himself hold it together as best as he can until Marie is in bed and asleep for the night, and then just try to have a meltdown as quietly as possible so as not to wake her up. Because, even in the situations where he did something to redeem himself to Max and Linda, abruptly being saddled with custody of his tiny niece after an undefined something happened to his big brother and his sister-in-law?
……Yeah, Seb’s not going to handle that well, at first
I mean, he will step up and try to keep it together and try to do his absolute best to take care of Marie and be a good, responsible, and loving guardian to her
But he’s an easily stressed out Disaster, and he would not handle the initial shock of losing Max and Linda well (+/- the rest of their family, too), and he would really, really need a lot of help with this, both in terms of, “keeping it together emotionally because he needs to grieve and deal with the stress here or it’s not going to make any of this less horrible for the tiny human who just lost her parents”
and in terms of, “Seb has never cared for a tiny human for any real extended period of time before, and there is a HUUUUGE difference between being a favored uncle who spends time with her, usually with at least one more consistently responsible chaperone, and can make lunch and take her to the zoo and whatnot……… and actually being a parent”
PETE5: Your character is partial to people who _____? (Are tall, have blue eyes, tend to be rowdy, etc)
In general, Pete tends to be partial to people who are, “interesting,” “different,” or at the very least, “not boring,” which is about all he ever says on the subject because his opinion is, “lmao, I don’t need to explain myself to you.” In fairness to him, “interesting” could mean a lot of things for Pete.
e.g., Aside from them just having been through a lot together since, Seb first went from, “freshman I’m supposed to babysit and ‘mentor’ or whatever because Sister Mary Ignatius said so” to, “actual friend” because of his reactions to seeing sides of Pete other than the witty, effervescent, charming façade that he put on in high school.
Like, the side of Pete that was a karaoke prince, which usually only came out at parties when he was sufficiently drunk, or in the sanctity of his bedroom with his cassette player and his sister Cora’s hairbrush;
the side of Pete that professes that his music taste is, “I don’t care anything but country” and yet adores Dolly Parton, and says that she doesn’t count as country because she is a Diva and divas transcend genre, obviously;
the side of Pete that was anxiously hyper-protective of the shoebox under his bed where he kept his collection of pics of cute guys that he clipped out of Cora’s discarded teen girly and, “young ladies’ interests” magazines (Luke Perry circa 90210 and the guys of Buffy made a lot of appearances in said shoebox because Pete collected said pics in 1995-2001);
the side of Pete that has a lot of insecurities, many of which are grounded in how he has trouble reconciling how much he loves being around people and wants to be popular, with how much he, A., doesn’t actually like most people, and B., is terrified that his shit-bag Dad was probably right and he is fundamentally unlovable;
and the side of Pete that baby-talks at cats for 10+ minutes without getting bored, or showing any signs of stopping at all until said cats get tired of him and leave.
And it’s not like Pete let Seb see said sides of him as some kind of test or anything like that. Some of them came out by happy accident
While others came out because Pete still thought of Seb as, “that freshman who is my peer mentorship kid now or whatever, I guess, and wouldn’t you know it, I got matched up with the one who might be the only other gay kid at St. Andrew’s who doesn’t think he needs to hate himself for it,” and Seb really wanted Pete to like him and tried so hard to be accommodating and unobtrusive that Pete did, sometimes, kinda forget he was still there.
But then Seb found most of these things genuinely endearing in one way or another, which Pete found deeply confusing, so he took more of an active interest because he wanted to find out what Seb’s deal was…… and eventually, he had to conclude that Seb’s deal was just wanting to be his friend, and not because he got anything extra out of it or because of the version of himself that Pete played at school, but because he liked Pete exactly as he was.
By that time, Pete had learned about enough of Seb’s quirks to say that he was, “different and not boring” for other reasons, but… yeah, no. The big reason why Seb was initially, “different and not boring” was that he genuinely wanted to be Pete’s friend
Romantically, though, Pete tends to insist that his preference is, “Chris Evans or at least Chris Evans-adjacent.” It’s true that he has a big Thing for Chris Evans, but it’s nowhere near as all-consuming as he likes to make it out to be (but most people probably don’t get to know that because…… mmm, nah. Pete doesn’t want to talk about it with you, probably).
Historically speaking, he has tended to date other guys in theatre, but that’s more due to proximity than actual preference. He likes people who can keep him on his toes, in general but especially intellectually.
Being, “taller than him but not by as much as Sebastian” is also a good thing, because while he likes guys who are taller (and… I mean. He’s 5’10”, so it’s not like he’s short or anything), being over 6’3” is a deal-breaker because he already has a best friend who’s 6’3” (and the guy he wants his best friend to please date already is 6’1”), and being around too many people who are noticeably taller than Pete kinda makes him feel short and potentially threatened.
But, seriously, if anyone has Chris Evans’s number? Pete wants it. Please.
………What?! He said, “Please.”
45: Your character would _______ for a klondike bar.
Pete would not go out of his way or really do anything in particular for a klondike bar because he doesn’t want one, because if he’s going to eat ice cream, then it’s going to be interesting and quality ice cream, and not something cheap and kinda gross that he could get at 7-11 at 2 AM.
He would, however, invite everyone else to do all manner of ridiculous shit for a klondike bar. Just wait for him to make popcorn before you start, okay?
MARGOT25: When put into X situation, your character is calm and collected and patient, while others may be anywhere from confused to panicking and screaming. Talk about X-Situation and why it means what it does to your character.
This could be said about Margot in most situations, really. She’s an example of someone who could definitely be called an introverted extrovert, because she has superficial ease at dealing with people
Despite how she, like Pete, doesn’t really like most people, she’d actually rather be around people than not because she hates feeling unproductive and mentally sluggish, and one of the ways that she gets the most mental stimulation is being around people and listening to them, if not always talking to them
Also, when she’s not around people, it’s easy for her to slip into, “this is why you don’t leave some people alone with their thoughts” territory (which, for Margot, generally involves forcing herself to come up with ideas, which most often means schemes that are probably really bad ideas, but she doesn’t fact-check very well, and when she goes over them for holes, she’ll put safety measures and backups in place for the wrong things — which would be fine, if these things stayed limited to the realm of her elaborate fantasy life as a masterclass art thief, but they usually don’t. Whoops.)
(Pete, on the other hand, would rather be around people than not because he thrives off of social stimulation and affection [though good luck getting him to admit that], and when he slides into, “this is why you don’t leave some people alone with their thoughts” territory, it tends to involve the, “maybe my Dad was right and I’m just unlovable” thing)
—but either way, despite having ostensible ease in dealing with people (and being Extroverted in the MBTI sense, being an ENTP), she’s nevertheless introverted in the sense of playing her actual feelings close to her chest, not opening up to most people (even her boys — Seb, Pete, and Todd — have trouble getting her to be more open about her feelings or what’s going on for her without needing to either needle her a bit, or wait for Margot to open up or get too emotionally overwhelmed to keep it down on her own)
The flip-side of this is that it’s easy for her to go into an intellectual mode while everyone else is losing their heads, even when they are, for example, stuck in the middle of a super-villain’s attack on her office (which, seeing as she’s an accountant and her firm has some pretty big deal contracts with companies like Lockheed and Boeing, plus a handful of contracts with local government in Baltimore as well as the U.S. Federal government, happens…
…eh, it’s not something that happens every month? But there’s an Incident of some kind at her office more regularly than there would be if she worked at Coca-Cola, Nestlé, or D.H. Morgan, but less regularly than there would be if she worked at somewhere that’s way more immediately accessible or target-able, like a bank or a Walmart or a Starbucks or the production company that makes the All-Stars’ big shiny reality show)
Frankly, she should lose her head more often, because it’s pretty damn unhealthy to force herself to repress everything and stay cool while, for example, keeping her head down and just trying to ignore it while Those Two Super-Tools are fumbling all over the pre-written speeches they were given to throw at the people they’re trying to get certain invoices and books from, and it would be laughable if they didn’t have, y’know, guns and possibly henchmen who are infinitely more competent than they are
(which is usually what happens when Those Two Super-Tools go on any given job, because seriously, Edward and Dezi are just BAD. at EVERYTHING. if they weren’t super-fascists with deeply off-putting personalities and over-inflated senses of white straight male entitlement, you could almost feel bad for them because they want so much to be good at something but they suck at everything, like they are just terrible)
—or, like. If your no romo soulmate person has been kidnapped by ecoterrorists because he didn’t believe his ex when said ex flat-out admitted to being an ecoterrorist (because, “seriously, what kind of ecoterrorist admits to being an ecoterrorist on the first date?”), then it would be understandable to, like…… take a break and not work on your own attempts at finding and saving him, working behind the backs of the people who are trying to do so in an official capacity, and doing it with tools of your own devising or purchasing that aren’t necessarily reliable
Buuuuuut y’know what Margot did when that happened?
Yeah, she stayed awake for several days, doing that thing that I just said with the unsanctioned attempts at finding Seb on her own, and only crashed out after Seb had been retrieved, when she and Todd got on a train up to Penn Station (where they needed to switch to a train to Ossining)
LUCY26: Conversely, when put into Z-Situation, your character faints/screams/freezes with terror/is otherwise unable to respond properly in the situation and should probably not be allowed to lead here. Talk about Z-Situation and what it means to your character.
On one hand, it’s not that Lucy shouldn’t be allowed to go clubbing, and she’ll handle it just fine once you give her a couple minutes to adjust to it
But her initial reaction to a club environment — and to most places that are loud and full of people, whether they’re clubs or Times Square or Disney World or a music festival or whatever — is to kind of freeze up and go, “ehhhhhhh” for reasons involving there being a lot of sensory information that’s suddenly swooping in to be all, “HELLO THERE LUCY YOU SO WANT TO BE OVERWHELMED RIGHT NOW, YEAH? :DDDDD”
—which also sucks for her because she really LOVES new sensory experiences. They excite her, she wants to DO ALL THE THINGS and stick her hands into everything and LEARN STUFF OMG THIS IS ALL SO COOL OKAY, and she thrives on new experiences like this…… but when they actually start happening, she needs a bit of time to adjust before she can actually enjoy any of it because all of that sensory input will be overwhelming at first, and she hasn’t really learned how to slowly slip into things or strategies for managing all of the sensory overload, yet
—and on the other hand, public speaking. She shouldn’t be wholly barred from this either, because, again? Give her a moment to just get herself acclimated, and she’ll be fine. But public speaking is still nerve-inducing and scary, especially since she’s usually doing this for reasons she thinks of as Super Important, so she doesn’t want to screw anything up, and that perfectionism makes it worse, so she gets nervous and awkward and starts trying to force things, and she can easily end up putting her foot in her mouth if she tries to improvise without thinking
But really, if you just give her a couple moments or help her to get ready, she should be fine
SARA GRACE13: Your character does ____ or avoids ____ because they associate it with having a good/bad day.
Sara Grace is one of those people who dresses better, does more elaborate makeup (which sometimes stays in “natural look” territory; sometimes goes in “there’s contouring but it’s otherwise not too far off from the ‘natural look’ makeup that she does”; and sometimes straight up goes into, “i want to look otherworldly and possibly from the moon” territory), and puts more effort into her appearance in general as she gets more and more stressed, because she has to have control over something, jeez
—which, on one hand, means that she associates these kinds of behaviors with having a bad day or a bad time of things in general, and if she shows up to something in higher heels than she’d usually wear, a cute dress with a frilly short petticoat, and makeup that she describes as, “pastel vampire princess” or, “queen of the Unseelie Court” or similar, then it’s a really good bet that she isn’t feeling well, and she might not want to talk about it, but you should probably be gentler with her than usual
for the sake of helping with visualization: I’ve been picturing Asha Bromfield as Sara Grace
ADELAIDE50: Some people take all the paperclips out of the box and chain them together. Name something useless your character does but never bothered to stop.
Alphabetizing M&M’s and Skittles by color before eating them
Which is even more useless because she’ll then portion them off into groups of five to actually eat them, and they get mixed up all over again
Saving all the orange Starbursts for last
Silently naming the animals she sees — e.g., ducks at the park — and then concocting moderately elaborate little soap operas for all of them in her head, unless someone interrupts her and keeps her attention focused elsewhere
#builttobalance#memes for ts#mine: writing#that story with the mutants that i should find a working title for fml#oc questions#sebastian moncrieff: mutant disaster#pete arden: dramatic disaster#sara grace kelley#adelaide moncrieff: ambitious disaster#margot gabriel: chainsmoking disaster#lucy murphy: hemokinetic disaster#drugs cw// addiction cw// death ref//#shitty tags i'm sorry i'm running out the door for therapy i'll fix them later <3
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April Activities 2020
I’m really hoping that May is a more uplifting month than the last two months combined, I need it to be. We’re still staying at home and doing the best we can, but there have been so many things cancelled lately and I really just want to look forward to something. Here’s what went down this month.
I watched the first season of Dave on FX and wow. Just wow. It’s such a good show and I’m so glad I listened to my brother Robbie and watched it. Ten episodes. Each better than the last.
I also watched the new Mindy Kaling creation on Netflix, Never Have I Ever, and it was as good as I hoped it would be and more. Again, there are only ten episodes and I wish there were more. Also, the soundtrack is killer, see for yourself, bud.
I made this banana cake with coffee cream cheese frosting and it was heavenly.
If you are looking for an uncomplicated curry recipe to make, this is the perfect one (I used green beans instead of snap peas and it was still great).
My mom sent me this song for obvious reasons and now I can’t stop playing it.
So excited to hear that Shrill got confirmed for another season! Perfect show.
Do you know about Pluto? It’s a crazy good streaming platform and dare I say, better than Netflix (as long as you don’t care about the occasional ad).
You can see my favourite tweets of the month over here.
Tip: never get tomato sauce in a can. Tastes so tinny! Did everyone else already know this?
I tried Hal’s New York Seltzer water in the COLA flavour and HOLY CHRIST. Tastes exactly like Coke. It’s fucking wild. Shoulda bought ten of them but when I went back they were all gone. Like a mirage.
Is it abnormal to share a photo of a gorgeous woman? ‘Cause I saw this photo of Lili Reinhart (from Riverdale) and my jaw dropped, so gorgeous.
I finally finished this season of Curb and the last two episodes were probably the best. There were definitely cringey parts in a few episodes this season, but overall it was pretty good. I really think Larry David is probably just an asshole who happens to be funny sometimes, just my impression.
I’ve been burned so many times, but I’m never buying Barilla pasta again. Their no-boil lasagna sheets no-joke look like recycled sandpaper and taste like ASS. Never again. Also, I think I’m against no-boil lasagna sheets. Just boil some sheets! What’s the big deal! You’re not busy!
And speaking of lasagna, I’ve made this mushroom spinach lasagna three times this month and it’s heavenly. The only thing I do differently is that I use a food processor to grind up the mushrooms so they’re almost like a paste. Tastes incredible. It tastes better when it’s reheated the next day, too. Lasagna lunch? Get out of here, best day of the week.
These blueberry breakfast cookies are now officially in the recipe rotation since I’m about to make them for the third time. They taste better after being chilled, in my opinion. And not to be pornographic, but a blueberry bursting in your mouth? Yes, please.
I just tried this bath soak and it’s made me want to create a bath basket for myself, which is basically just a basket full of bath shit like Epsom salts, bath oils, bubble bath, bath bombs, etc. Future me is gonna be relaxed as fuck.
Love reading what people want to eat out when life is back on again. If you don’t think I already have a list going, THINK AGAIN. I’ll post it when better days are near.
We’ve entered the part of quarantine where Buzzfeed listicles are making me laugh. (Specifically #2 and #6.)
I made this cauliflower bolognese and look, it was good but I’ll never make it again because it took WAY too long for what you’re ultimately getting. It’s not a bolognese. Nothing meatless should be allowed to be called a bolognese, it’s unjust.
I watched The Phantom of the Opera for the 11th (??) time when it streamed for free a few weeks ago and it was, as always, magical. I maintain that Colm Wilkinson was the very best phantom there ever was. (P.S. I will always love these types of videos.)
Still in love with this egg salad recipe.
I didn’t know it was possible to do anything with stale bread other than make them into breadcrumbs or croutons: How to Revive Stale Bread
Can’t stop making these wildly easy smashed potatoes. When I’m feeling real fancy, I’ll make the sauce from this baked pickles recipe for dipping.
Yes, I have three books in my pile to be read right now, but I’m still really excited for this one. Already pre-ordered.
Really good article: Why Life During A Pandemic Feels So Surreal
Some of these quarantine tips about staying in touch with friends are actually good, not all but some.
I did a Zoom call with my whole family and we played games on jackbox.tv and it was actually really fun. Might become a standing Sunday morning activity.
When I’m not crying or drinking or taking a bath, I like to do beauty masks. But here’s the thing: I think all hair masks are a scam. How can you tell that they’ve DONE anything to your hair? Don’t you think that some charlatan could easily just put some basic-ass conditioner into a tiny disposable package and label it as some hair rejuvenating miracle? And while we’re here, it’s 100% likely that face masks are bullshit too. We’re being bamboozled and at this point I can’t even care about it because it’s genius. I’ll keep buying them and they’ll continue to do nothing.
Nathan started a Patreon! Check it!
This photo (below) from this nurse’s personal account of what’s going on right now is so good.
I tried a sample of Dr. Dennis Gross’s face serum and whoa. I love the idea of using a serum right after washing your face, so I just bought a reward-sized sample of this Drunk Elephant serum (it’s on its way) that’ll hopefully feel somewhat similar.
Loved the peachy smell of this Peter Roth cleanser from a sample I got.
I rewatched some of Master of None and it remains great.
Other still-great things that I also rewatched: Arlington Road & House of Sand and Fog.
I made the Dalgona coffee that everyone’s been making, but I didn’t put it on top of milk (that sounded gross). I put it on top of iced coffee for, like, some kind of super coffee. It was really good. I was jacked for hours. (And I haven’t tried it, but this Dalgona frosted chocolate cake looks nuts.)
Obviously loved hearing the Queen’s address.
I’ve been on almost all of Nathan’s podcasts this month, so just go on over there if you care (there are video clips too). Personal favourite is the bug mug one.
Little girl plays my favourite song.
I rewatched most of Community and I truly forgot what a great show that was. The first three seasons, I mean. MAYBE four. Best episodes: the missing pen one, the chaos theory one, love the Halloween ones, and the video game one is great. I will continue to hate musical episodes of any show, why do they do it? Who is it for? I’ve never heard one person say that they loved when a regular show did a musical episode. END THIS NONSENSE.
So I attempted to make the Asiago Chicken Bowtie Pasta from Jack Astor’s from this copycat recipe, and even though it reeeeally doesn’t taste the same, it’s still a decent recipe. It also tastes way better reheated the next day.
I made these chocolate chip cookies and they were very good. Not a super complicated recipe either, which is always a plus.
Tip: you shouldn’t just plop shampoo on the top of your head and then start rubbing it in (this leads to flat hair). You should rub it in right above the top of your neck and then work it in from there, it gets way more lathered up quicker this way. Please try it for yourself.
I finally tried the Canyon Creek caesar salad dressing recipe that I got from a waiter there years ago AND IT IS PERFECT. I feel weird posting it publicly, but if you love that salad and want to make it at home, I’ll absolutely send it to you if you ask.
Made this halloumi hummus bowl and it was really, really good. Love pearled couscous, love grilled halloumi.
Nathan and I watched Monkey Shine on Pluto and holy shit what a fun movie. Brief plot: It’s about a young athlete who becomes a paralyzed quadriplegic, and develops a bond with an intelligent service monkey named "Ella" who becomes homicidal after she is injected with an experimental serum of human brain tissue. HOW COULD THIS NOT BE AMAZING? It’s not going to sound funny now, but there’s this montage of the monkey doing all sorts of things for the man and then she puts this burrito-thing in the machine holder for him to eat and Nathan said something like, “Here… comes… PITA!” like she was gonna launch it to his mouth and I fucking died laughing. Truly just a fun movie.
Made these lemon ricotta cookies that were very light and lovely.
Some things that I’d like to do this month: make this burrata mushroom lasagna, I’d love to try this caesar recipe, I intend to finally review last month’s Ipsy bag that I’ve been putting off forever for no good reason, and I’ll likely rewatch the old Cannonball Run movies because I really want to. BIG PLANS.
Also, don’t forget about Mother’s Day on the 10th. Just a reminder. If you’ve got any interest in reading last month’s roundup, you can see what went down in March over here.
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The Force Awakens
Almost 4 years ago, I started my Star Wars rewatch by watching the original series in preparation to watch the Force Awakens. Then I rewatched the prequels before The Last Jedi. And now I’m seeing Rise of Skywalker on Sunday, so it’s time to rewatch the 2 other sequels.
I’ve rewatched the Force Awakens a couple of times since I first saw it, so it should still be fresh in my mind. As for the Last Jedi, I have not been able to bring myself to watch that one because of the ending. Not because I hated it, I loved it, but because it hurts.
Also, this gives me a distraction so I don’t get spoiled for Rise of Skywalker. Again. Can’t believe I’ve been spoiled twice already in just 2 days... luckily it was the same spoiler twice. One that was vague and I hoped it wasn’t right, but then the other one was a gif of the scene so now I know it’s true. Ugh...
This is super long and I apologize in advance.
“A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away...” I didn’t see the Force Awakens in theaters. I saw it at home nearly a year later (after getting spoiled for all major plot points during that year). So I can’t IMAGINE the pure joy that people felt when they got to see the opening title crawl for the first time in 10 years. I wish I had seen it in theaters. Ok. I don’t like that I can’t pause Disney+ with the spacebar like other streaming sites let me... or maybe it’s just my computer. ANYWAY. I forgot that the opening crawl literally says “Skywalker, the last Jedi” in it, accidentally telling us the title of the next movie. Yeah so I can already tell I’ll be pausing every like 2 seconds. But I love this opening shot of a ship blocking out a MOON. Oh and NOW the spacebar works to pause. One of those stormtroopers is Finn. Awww. BB8! I didn’t realize he’s (they’re?) the first character we see (that we know is an important character since at this point we don’t really know which stormtrooper is Finn). Poe! Giving a message to a droid... so I know we like to think of Poe as the Han of the sequel trio... but honestly he’s the Leia. Yeah I mean... a friend (or at least co-worker) smearing their blood on your face with their hand as they die is definitely traumatizing enough to make you rethink your life. Finn, I don’t blame you. I started this scene like “Oh we’re gonna get the Knights of Ren and Kylo freezing the blaster ray using the Force” then I got so into the scene that I forgot Kylo was going to show up at all.
It’s not a Star Wars rewatch if my grandma doesn’t call and interrupt at least once. This time it was right as Kylo came out of the ship.
Kylo’s powerful. I’ll give him that. Holding that blaster ray for as long as he's about to. I love Poe looking back at it. Poe’s first lines to Kylo are joking about who gets to talk first, when Kylo’s literally still holding a blaster ray in midair and knows Poe has the map he wants. And people say “General Hugs” during a battle was out of character. GENERAL PHASMA! GWENDOLINE MY QUEEN! Poor baby Finn. [BB8 moans softly] BB8 NO DON’T CRY. Oh poor Finn. But yay first time we see his face! It just hit me that now I’m the same age/older than John and Daisy when they filmed this... great.... AND REY! I remember when we first saw footage of her climbing around, I said to my dad “I think that’s supposed to be Han and Leia’s daughter.” So far I’m wrong. I’ve been holding out hope for years that maybe just maybe there will be a twist and I’m right. I’m fine with her parents being nobodies, but I kind of want to be right. I’m probably not. The scale of that ship behind her... The shot of her speeding across the desert has such... original trilogy vibes. It never registered to me that Rey has some wilting flowers. That brings new meaning to the “so much green” scene later... Awwww the practical effect bread... Ok. I’m being nit picky, but they drained it just a split second too early. If it’d drained just a millisecond later, it would have been perfectly timed with the inflation of the bread. But that’s just me nitpicking for no reason. It’s an impressive effect. “Classified? Me too. Big secret.” LOL even at the time I knew the fandom was making a big fuss about that line for nothing. Too on the nose for it to truly be a big secret she’s keeping from the world. I figured she meant it was a big secret to her. Of course... then people got mad that they wasted their time analyzing that... it’s their own fault really. I forgot that they actually eventually get the location of the map out of Poe. Oh and hi General Hugs! “This is a rescue. I’m helping you escape.” Yep Poe is Leia. She was initially being rescued, but then ends up having to help rescue her rescuer(s) while they’re trying to rescue her. “Because it’s the right thing to do.” If Finn was raised as a stormtrooper, even just to work in sanitation, he wouldn’t necessarily have a moral compass since he wouldn’t know what’s right... at this point I think he just knows he doesn’t like killing... Like how Zuko didn’t realize he wasn’t good because he was taught something else was good. (YES. Finn is closer to Zuko) “You need a pilot” “I need a pilot” Ok see so it’s not necessarily what’s right, but he knows this is how he can get out. Sorta selfish, but not really. Oooooh yeah! It’s Thomas Brodie-Sangster! Forgot he was in this. Wilhelm Scream! Poe naming Finn. Aww. Ok see. How does Kylo know Finn’s identification? Did he ask Phasma “who was the one with the blood on his helmet?” right after they got back on the ship? Because otherwise, he’d have no way to tell them apart in that moment, I don’t think they have their names on their armor unless I never noticed, and even then Kylo would be too far away to read it. There’s a picture of little baby Finn... he was so young when the First Order took him (I assume they took him, I’d hate it if his parents sent him there) OH WOW. ANOTHER WOMAN! Oh and it’s whats-her-face, she was in Deathly Hallows Part 1. (IMDB says Kate Fleetwood) See, back in the day the Empire had no women in their ranks. This is the only thing the First Order is doing right, equal opportunity to be a space Nazi. I forgot that the wreckage gets sucked into the sand... that sucks. Here’s where Poe would have died if Oscar hadn’t been so charismatic. Also, do we ever find out how he survived this? I forgot about the explosion afterwards that just adds insult to injury. Was that necessary? Was that supposed to be funny? If it was, why are people criticizing the Last Jedi’s humor if this moment tries to make us laugh at a character dying... I hope that wasn’t meant to be funny... My poor baby... stranded on a strange desert planet... alone... with the First Order looking for him... I love this giant hippo thing. I want one.
Whiny fanboys: Rey’s a Mary Sue! She can’t know how to fight already! Rey: *Been fighting creeps at the market since she was born*
And I love how she caught Finn. Oh nooo BB8 no don’t cry! Finn, babe, why would you just tell Rey about the map!? Babe! I get that you want to seem reliable and credible, but baby! No! The way Rey was sort of horrified by Finn holding her hand... makes me really wonder what she’s been through. “Stop taking my hand!” Aww and how she offers her hand to him. “The garbage will do” Oh how I wish I hadn’t been spoiled that that was the Millennium Falcon reveal. But that line did create a meme so that’s fun. Wow the Millennium Falcon has been through a LOT. That dramatic zoom in as they fly into the ship (I’m sorry, I do not have ship names memorized) was very Torchwood. The sudden, almost shaky and unnecessary zoom. That upside down shot though. Amazing. And also terrifying. “You’re ok. He’s with the Resistance” *BB8 gives Finn a pointed look* I am DEAD. Oh and the Powerpoint style transitions between scenes. Very necessary. Vital to every Star Wars movie. Kylo. You’re like 30. You should not still have temper tantrums. Grow up. Awww BB8. The internal battle. Followed by the thumbs up. Adorable. Literally for a second I was like “How could the First Order override the controls of the Millennium - HAN!!!!” HAN AND CHEWIE!!!!! I will never forget watching the Force Awakens trailer for the first time with my dad, and nearly sobbing over “Chewie... we’re home.” Also what the hell, Chewie has been through SO MUCH and he’s STILL around! He was protecting Yoda in Revenge of the Sith! And then ends up enslaved and being fed people before Han meets him in Solo!?!?!? What?!?!?!? AND had a whole family before all of that!?!??!?!?!?
Also, watching Solo and realizing that Chewie’s been forced to eat people literally shattered my heart into a billion pieces. I wanted to cry seeing him covered in that mud and trying to kill Han.
Aww, Han and Chewie know the hiding places. I’m not even a third of the way through and I’ve written way too much.
Finn: Han Solo, the Rebellion general? Rey: No, the smuggler! Finn: Wasn’t he a war hero? Chewie: *Grunts and shrugs ‘I don’t know’*
That says so much about all of their characters. Oh god the 12 parsecs thing. I was legitimately MAD when I was watching Solo and realized that they had actually figured out a way to make the 12 parsecs thing make sense. That they actually solved and fixed George Lucas’ mistake, when he was literally just trying to find a cool word and didn’t care about the actual meaning. I am still so angry they managed to fix it in a way that made sense. I started raging once I realized that they were doing it. Awww Han in the cockpit. Ok Finn there you go again, telling everyone about the map to Luke. You’re lucky that Han’s one of the few people it’s good to tell. It could have gone so wrong with Rey. That subtle Binary Sunset piercing my heart. Hey it’s that kid from that Eaters of Light episode of Doctor Who. And when I watched that episode I was like hey it’s that kid from the Force Awakens. He looks familiar to me, but those are the only two things I’ve seen him in. “I got a bad feeling about this” He said the thing! Yeah the Rathtars are gross. Aww and he grabbed her hand again to run. I just noticed that they made the camera lens blurry on the edge, like some of the goo got on it. “That was lucky.” Rey’s so modest. I forgot that they hyperspeeded through the Rathtar... also did that happen in the original series too or am I just remembering it wrong? Anyway, Admiral Holdo did it best. 2nd mention of the last Jedi. Also, LOL remember when everyone was theorizing who Snoke was? My favorite theory was that he was Mace Windu. That was a WILD conspiracy theory. “In the hands of your father... Han Solo.” Oh the dramatic reveal. Awww BB8 running away from Chewie’s roar. Awwww the hologram game! And it’s still stop motion! “It’s true. The Force. The Jedi. All of it.” I forget what video I was watching, but they pointed out that this was Han’s arc. Learning to believe in the Force. I guess in that way, he has a satisfying ending. “I didn’t know there was this much green in the whole galaxy” I remember people saying that Han’s face is basically him thinking ‘...oh no... looks like I gotta adopt this kid.’
...It’s hitting me that we’re going to see Leia in this movie... and I’m gonna be emotional...
...AM I JUST NOW REALIZING THAT CHEWIE’S STRAP OVER HIS CHEST IS A STRAP TO A BAG? I THOUGHT IT WAS JUST TO HOLD AMMO OR SOMETHING?!?!? I’ve been a Star Wars fan for HOW many years and I’m just noticing this?!!? Also, in an alternate universe, Han survives and Rey goes off with him and Chewie and they have smuggling adventures and everyone’s happy and alive. Catina music by Lin Manuel! Yay! WOLFMAN! THEY PUT THE WOLFMAN IN THIS! WOW. Look at them shading George Lucas’s rerelease edits. ...Ok so Maz is definitely Force sensitive if she knew Han was there right away, right? Also, Maz is an example of how before Rose Tico and whoever Naomi plays in RoS (I will not google her character name because I know I will get spoiled), we very rarely see AND hear women of color, we get just one or the other. They’re either in the background with no lines or playing a character that isn’t a human if they have lines. The only exception coming to mind is the Queen of Naboo who took over after Padme, Jamillia. Ok I forgot that the lady who rats them out to the First Order actually gets a line and isn’t painted green, so good for her! I love her costume too. Too bad she’s evil.
See. We hear the breathing of Vader, because Ani is so done with his idiot grandson worshipping him that he’s sighing in defeat in the afterlife. Ani needs to Force Ghost himself over to Kylo and be like “DID YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THAT WHEN I THREW A SITH LORD DOWN A HOLE THAT IT MEANT I WAS TURNING AGAINST THE DARK SIDE? DID THAT GO OVER YOUR HEAD? DID MY ENTIRE CHARACTER ARC GO OVER YOUR HEAD??” Please, what I want most from the Rise of Skywalker (besides making sure Leia gets the proper send off she deserves) is Hayden coming back as a Force Ghost and knocking some sense into Kylo.
Oh Finn. The captions tell us who was talking during the vision... and there WAS a lot of Obi-Wan dialogue... Also poor Rey. She probably definitely remembers her parents, but just blocked it out. Now. If after the endless lines of soldiers, the podium with a giant red and black flag behind it, and the arms rising up still make the space Nazi thing go over your head... then we just can’t help you anymore. HEY! WAS THAT WHATSHERFACE?!? Ghost from Ant-Man and the Wasp? Was that her? Yes! IMDB says it was Hannah John-Kamen! Look at you girl! Too bad you’re evil too. Ok. I will admit that I blanked out for General Hugs’ speech because who wants to listen to a space Nazi. But, has the Star Destroyer been mentioned before this point in the movie? Because I literally can’t remember. If Hugs said it then I probably let my mind wander. Oh and I do appreciate these two dudes who were like “Yeah sure Finn, come with us, work for a bit, and we’ll help you get far away” and were going to let Finn come along with them. They seem nice. Also. Here’s the girl who’s not Freema Ageman. Not every black girl is Martha Jones. The entire internet was like “Martha was in Star Wars!” then I watched the movie and I was like “...that literally was not Freema what are you all on about?” IMDB says she’s Maisie Richardson-Sellers, she’s also in Legends of Tomorrow, which is something I do hope to watch one day. So good for her. The ion engines sounded like the TARDIS for a split second and I was VERY confused. “How did you get that?” “A good question for another time.” Ok JJ you gotta stop with all these unanswered questions that you pose. I get that that’s your thing. And that you have some term for it. But there’s too many now. This one better get answered in Rise of Skywalker. That behind the back shot though. I’m convinced Han’s Force sensitive too. Not even convinced, I think it’s canon. LOL remember when everyone named that stormtrooper who recognized Finn TR-8R.
Finn: *Manages to function using a lightsaber even though he’s only trained with blasters* Fanboys: *Silence* Rey: *Fights with a lightsaber well since she’s fought with sticks her whole life and it’s a similar concept* Fanboys: MARY SUE! SHE CAN’T BE THAT GOOD THAT FAST!
Oh my god it’s the Resistance FINALLY. POE!!!! Yes, I did just scream “Poe!!” out loud. Now, I’m not sure where these forest scenes were filmed, but if you told me the same forest where half of Merlin’s forest scenes were filmed then I would not be shocked. Merlin had some scenes in a similarly narrow trench/valley/pathway/thing. No but seriously, yes the plants look like they’re more tropical than whatever forest Merlin filmed in in the UK, but the trench looks so similar. Oh god the second we saw Leia I froze. And then Leia’s Theme played and I had a sad smile. And then C-3PO popped up and I laughed. Awwww. I love C-3PO so much. There’s so much that body language can convey. Oh no. While watching Finn and Poe reunite, I suddenly remembered that fanedit that put Helpless from Hamilton as the background of the scene. And i laughed. Oh 2015. When all we cared about was Star Wars and Hamilton. That lip bite. Oscar stop it. Billie Lourd! So I’ve realized over the years that R2D2 kind of sucks. Not that I don’t love him. But he spends the entire original trilogy lying by omission, when he could have just told them everything he knew from the prequels (since he WITNESSED everything and didn’t have his memory erased like 3PO did). And now, he just sits back while everyone scrambles to find Luke and does nothing, WHEN HE HAS THE ANSWER. Yes. I get that it’s deeper than that. But still. It’s funny to think that R2 just wants to sit back and watch the drama unfold while not telling anyone that Vader is Luke’s dad or that he has Luke’s map. (Unless I’m remembering it incorrectly and R2 doesn’t have it. If that’s the case R2 gets a pass this one time.) [It wasn’t the case, R2 doesn’t get a pass] “It is very doubtful that R2 would have the rest of the map in his backup data.” C-3PO are you sure? Because I’m not. I think low-power mode means R2 wants to relax and watch the soap opera that is Star Wars unfold. “There’s still light in him, I know it.” For your sake Leia, I hope there is too. But Kylo is going to need a hell of a redemption arc in tRoS. See, and I can’t remember when I found this out, but the ashes that he puts his helmet in are the ashes of people he’s killed. Kylo Ren SAVES the ashes. He has a TUB of them in his office. What is WRONG with him!??! Yeah so him reading her mind about the ocean was just plain creepy. I just... don’t understand Reylo shippers. “You. You’re afraid... that you will never be as strong as Darth Vader.” And he’s right to be afraid! Ani eventually had the strength to turn himself around! Kylo Ren could never! I won’t believe it till I see it! And even then I might not believe it! I think that people forget that Kylo’s supposed to be like 30 years old. I will say that Adam plays the role in this first movie like Kylo’s very young with a hint of a tiny possibility that he feels like he’s in over his head. Really he only plays it that way when the helmet’s off. So I get that he seems younger, but Adam was like 30 when he filmed this too. So why do so many fans coddle Kylo when he’s a grown man? A grown man who’s killing people. After a certain point, you can’t blame Luke or his parents or Snoke... if the guy is literally worshipping his grandfather and ignoring the fact that even Ani turned back to the light side... then the guy has issues. Rey failed twice before getting the Jedi mind trick right. Also, I love that Daisy’s face kind of sorta softened with less fear before she said the command and got it right. I’ve seen the scene of the stormtroopers literally going “Nope” and turning away from Kylo’s tantrum many times over the years, but I didn’t realize that Kylo screams “GUARDS” as he does it until I saw the caption just now. So not only are the stormtroopers like “I don’t want to get into that” they’re like “Let’s act like we didn’t hear him scream for us and let someone else get into that.” Which is even more hilarious. Ok it’s Starkiller not Star Destroyer. Whatever. I was close. But I knew that Luke’s last name was originally Starkiller, so I honestly should have guessed Starkiller in the first place. Whatever. Hey Admiral Akbar! The guy talking about the thermal oscillator looks familiar... was he in Night Shift... IMDB says he’s Ken Leung and yes he was in the Night Shift! Good for him! Awww that was the last time Han and Leia ever saw each other... “That’s not how the Force works.” The captions are telling me that the stormtroopers Rey is hiding from are just talking about how much their new weapons suck. That’s hilarious. “Is there a garbage shoot? Trash compactor?” Oh Han, I see what you did there. Wow, I didn’t notice that the walls of the base are rock, that it’s literally built INTO the planet. Awwwww Finn gave Rey his jacket! I was thinking she must be cold in just a t-shirt after living in a desert. Because I rewatched the last half of RotJ after Force Awakens, I was able to realize that this scene of Han and Chewie planting the bombs was a reference to RotJ, but only because of watching Force Awakens earlier that day. Really, I should have gotten the reference the other way around. “We’ll meet back here.” NOOOOO BUT YOU WON’T. THIS IS THE LAST TIME! Wait, did we not know his name was Ben before this? Was that the moment we all realized he was named after Obi-Wan? (Also, never really got that since Han and Leia knew Obi-Wan for only a couple of days at most... but whatever) Chewie keep going! Keep going and planting bombs while they’re distracted by Han! Come on! Ok I wanted to mention it earlier, but there was a lightbeam hitting Kylo when Snoke’s hologram disappeared, and that was after Snoke told him to be careful of going back to the light. Now as Han walks towards Kylo, there’s another lightbeam. It’s all very literal, but still. I like it. UH OH. I forgot about the light from the sun going away. Now Kylo’s literally in the darkness. We’re getting super literal now. (Also, I now realize that Poe’s line of “As long as we have the light we have a chance” was also a on-the-nose reference to light vs. dark and not just exposition about stopping the Starkiller, though it was also exposition.) I like to think that Han sorta knew that Kylo would kill him, and that he hoped it would eventually lead him to the light in some way and be worth it. But wow seeing Han fall hurts. OH AND LEIA. I FORGOT ABOUT LEIA KNOWING IMMEDIATELY AND JUST SINKING DOWN. OH I HURT. See. Finn’s literally just using a lightsaber like any other sword. Just hit your target with it. Because anyone can do that. Yes Rey! Summon that lightsaber! Earn that Binary Sunset! Trench run. Because Star Wars. Ok I gotta replay all of that because I was too busy getting lost in my mind about something and got distracted. Why is the Starkiller base falling apart? Ok got it, Poe hit a bunch of stuff that exploded. Cool.
Ok see. Some of the fans think fighting with a lightsaber is like a integral part of being one with the Force and being a Jedi. But literally, you just need to know is how to fight with a sword or a stick and you can fight with a lightsaber. The Force just means you’re better at predicting your opponent’s next moves, sensing the danger, knowing the best move to make, etc. That’s why Rey started winning against Kylo when he said “Join me and let me teach you the ways of the Force.” Before that, she’s just fighting like she would with her stick and all that’s doing is helping her survive and keep Kylo at bay, but she’s not winning. Being reminded that she’s Force sensitive let her tap into that and start incorporating that into the fight. Now she’s using the skills she already has, and using the Force to help her predict Kylo’s moves. She’s not magically good at using a lightsaber, she just already had skills that were easily transferable to a lightsaber and using the Force to enhance it.
I don’t think we’ve lost any arms yet in this movie, besides C-3PO off-screen.
OH. AND SNOKE SAYS KYLO NEEDS TO COMPLETE HIS TRAINING! He’s not even a full Sith Lord yet! He’s still being trained! So no, Rey did not just defeat a powerful Sith Lord, she defeated a Sith Lord in training. And she barely defeated him, he was already injured, she just fought hard enough to bring him to the ground. Then the ground literally separated them. Basically, I’m tired of people being mad that Rey has skills, she already had them. Plus, she’s not magically the most powerful Jedi ever like Ani was, she’s just strong. So go critique Ani for being literal space Jesus.
Oh Chewie. He’s alone saving Finn and Rey. My heart is breaking. All teams, Poe? You mean you and the other two who are left? Ok fine, there are a couple more X-Wings behind the Millennium Falcon. You and the other 6 who are left. Playing the Love Theme one last time. I am hurting. OH. NOW YOU WAKE UP, R2D2? NOW YOU WAKE UP? AFTER HAN DIES, YOU WAKE UP? Aww BB8′s like “Dad! Give me the map! I wanna put the puzzle together!” So I was right to be mad at R2D2. Literally sitting back, watching the drama, then at the end is like “Oh by the way, I have all the rest of the information you needed.” (Yes, I realize that I guess we’re supposed to infer that he spent all those years in low power mode trying to find the map, but whatever.) “May the Force be with you.” Oh Leia. Oh Carrie. Oh R2D2 NOW you’re excited. If you wanted to see Luke so bad, you should have found the map faster. You just know Luke knew they were coming, so he was like “Let me get my cloak out and stand on the highest point all mysteriously.” since he too lives for the drama (as we saw from all the flips in RotJ). Oh I love that ending so much. Some people think Last Jedi ruins the suspense of the ending. I love it. I love that Luke takes a minute to just stare at Rey and the lightsaber before deciding to chuck it over a cliff.
I’m watching the credits, and I noticed that Harrison gets first billing. I literally just said out loud “Why does Harri- ok no fine actually” since I realized this was his last Star Wars movie, so give him first billing. He deserves it.
So that’s the Force Awakens. Very enjoyable. I forget where I heard/read this, but the Force Awakens and Rogue One are like Star Wars comfort food. Super full of nostalgia.
And I do agree at least to an extent. Especially since the Force Awakens is like A New Hope all over again. A droid with a special message. Evil character with a spherical base that destroys planets. The evil Empire’s gone, but the evil First Order has taken over. And the Rebels are now the Resistance and are not that much better off than they were before.
But I LIVE for the nostalgia. Throughout the entirety of the prequels, I said that the best moments were the callbacks/references to the original series. The sequels do that better, so I really enjoy them.
Also I don’t actually hate R2D2. But the theory/idea that R2 is secretly a horrible person because of the fact he seems to know everything but never actually tell anyone what he knows is hilarious to me. And I never realized how well the Force Awakens fits into that theory. So it’s super funny to me.
Now hopefully, I can watch all of The Last Jedi tomorrow. I have a bit of a day... and this rewatch took like 4 hours since I literally paused every 2 seconds to write something. For the Last Jedi, I need to try to write less so I can pause less and finish the movie.
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True Detective Returns to Style of First Season for Third Outing
The first season of HBO’s “True Detective” was a true cultural phenomenon, earning rave reviews, loyal viewers, and multiple awards. The second season was…not. Arguably rushed by HBO to get to air to capitalize on the momentum, people hated it (although I’m here to argue that it wasn’t as bad as you remember if anyone wants to discuss) and the show that looked like it would be an annual event disappeared over the horizon. Everyone was pleasantly surprised when HBO announced in 2017 that they were resurrecting “True Detective” for a third outing, which would be partially directed by Jeremy Saulnier (“Blue Ruin,” “Hold the Dark”) and star Oscar winner Mahershala Ali (“Moonlight,” “Green Book”). It premieres this Sunday, January 13, and has much more in common structurally and tonally with the first season but still can’t quite compare with that year or the best of current television it so wishes to join.
What I mean by that last sentence is that nearly every frame and scene in “True Detective” announces its importance and intent. It’s largely due to creator/writer Nic Pizzolatto’s noir/macho dialogue, but rarely has a show telegraphed its desire to be taken seriously as art as much as “True Detective.” A lot has been written about how Cary Joji Fukunaga balanced that out in the first season, but the balance came equally from two actors who are widely-known as "laid-back dudes", often in comedies as much as drama—Woody Harrelson & Matthew McConaughey. Of course, the narrative of the first season was dark and dramatic, but Harrelson and McConaughey were the real counter-balances for Pizzolatto’s overwriting (and that’s what was lacking most in season two). Watching season three, I just wanted a moment when the characters caught their breath and didn’t feel like they were part of an overly-scripted machine.
Now, having said that, this is still engaging, dark, complex material, anchored by a great performance from Ali, supported by an excellent ensemble that includes Carmen Ejogo and Scoot McNairy. And Saulnier has become an interesting craftsman, willing to draw out scenes for the sake of setting enhancement. His work on the first two episodes is closer in tone to the bleak nihilism of “Hold the Dark” than anything else he’s made, and his ability reminds us of another element missing from season two (which went from the auteur model to an array of talented TV directors, who were mostly good but inconsistent). Saulnier and Ali work well together, the former finding some new registers to Ali’s heartfelt, almost mournful style. I’d love to see them work together on a film.
Credit: HBO/Warrick Page
Here, they’re working together on yet-another version of the “case that changed lives.” As in a lot of crime fiction, this year is about that one case that a detective couldn’t shake, and that really changed everybody involved forever. The first season of “True Detective” was about the barely-hidden layer of evil that exists in civilized society while the second used the corruption of an entire city to examine trauma. The third season is about a case so complex and tragic that it basically breaks the detective investigating it. As he did in season one, Pizzolatto jumps time periods with regularity, showing us the days right after the case began, when it was re-opened years later, and then even later when it still haunts our protagonist. He jumps the three eras with rattling regularity, and it’s clearly a thematic choice in that time has compressed as it often does after a major traumatic event—memory and action feel intertwined.
The traumatic event this season is the disappearance of two children, Will and Julie Purcell, in 1980 Arkansas. Their father (McNairy) let them go play at the park, and they never came home. There’s an excellent sequence in the premiere in which Saulnier tracks the people who saw the Purcell kids riding their bikes to the park—local kids playing in their yard, some suspicious teens in a car, a local known as the “Trash Man,” etc. Night fell, and they didn’t come home. Detectives Wayne Hays (Ali) and Roland West (Stephen Dorff) were called in to investigate a missing persons case, probably presuming the kids would be home soon or with their mother (Mamie Gummer). They had no idea what they were getting into.
The immediate aftermath of the investigation is the most interesting element but Pizzolatto and Saulnier get a lot of mileage out of the other two time periods as well because of the poignancy they add to the 1980 material. We get to see what this case will do to Hays, both in how enlivened he is by the possibility he could actually solve it in 1990 and then how it still haunts him in 2015 when he’s being interviewed for a true-crime documentary about it (by an intrepid reporter played by Sarah Gadon). The 2015 version of the retired Wayne Hays may be suffering from memory loss and dementia, but he’ll never forget the Purcell case.
Credit: HBO/Warrick Page
The mystery at the center of “True Detective,” and, more importantly, how that mystery impacted both Hays and his future wife, a local schoolteacher named Amelia Reardon (Ejogo), makes for interesting television, and I’m confident that Pizzolatto can bring in the final three, unscreened episodes for a landing in those terms. And “True Detective” is well-worth watching just as a showcase for Ali, increasingly one of our most interesting actors. Watch the different body language he brings to three eras, reflecting not just age but the ceaseless weight of the case that changed his life. It’s a great performance.
Having said that, there’s a bit of urgency missing here. Sure, season one meandered into Rust’s musings on the nature of time, and season two basically gave up on convincing anyone to care about who actually committed the murder that year—so “rambling” is nothing new for “True Detective”—but I recently rewatched both seasons and I was more engaged during episodes I had already seen than the five new ones this year. Perhaps times have changed a bit, even in just the last few years. As we get more and more anti-heroes and see more and more stories of awful crimes, they may not have the hook they once did. I think there’s a tighter, 6-episode third season of “True Detective” that allows Ali the same platform and Pizzolatto the same thematic exploration but doesn’t feel like it’s meandering. It’s possible that everyone involved wanted to mimic the first season so much that they never quite found the urgency in this one. My sincere hope though is that this is a hit—and it likely will be for Ali’s great work and a mystery that people will want to see solved—and the fourth season of “True Detective” can truly step out of the shadow of the first.
Screened the first five episodes of season three for review.
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Navy Bootcamp; Part 1
Hey all, it’s your girl Alana. In this post, I am going to discuss my experience being a Navy girlfriend and how I have been coping with everything, as well as offering some bits of advice here and there. PIR (Graduation) is about 3 weeks away, so I will post an update about that at a later time. Lets get into it
So today is Wednesday, August 9th, 2017, meaning that it has been 29 days since my boy left (July 11th, 2017) and there are 22 days until his graduation from bootcamp. It has been very difficult these past few weeks, but we have passed the halfway mark, so we are on the easy side of the mountain now.
Let’s start off from the beginning. The first day, I went with his family to MEPS which is where they do all the processing for everyone joining the military. There was about 4 hours of us just waiting around with him, getting to talk to him, and only about 20 minutes of him actually doing stuff (swearing in, getting tests, blah blah blah). I went the whole time without crying, until it was time for him to get on the bus to the airport. He starting crying so naturally I let all my tears go. after a minute or two of crying and hugging, we said goodbye and he got on the bus and that is the last time I have seen him.
On the car ride home, I was able to pull myself together so I wasn’t bawling in front of everyone, but once I got home, I was a wreck. I laid in bed and cried for a few hours. I was also very lucky because I got to call him and text him while he was at the airport because we are from Chicago, and the Naval Base is in the northern suburbs, so he didn’t have to get on a plane. He was just at the airport waiting for all the other SR’s to arrive before they left for Great Lakes. He called me about 10 minutes before he had to leave and sadly enough, my last text from him was “If i stop replying that means i left”, so I quickly typed up a nice “goodbye, good luck” kind of text, but by the time I pressed send it had already been too late. I’m not mad at him for leaving me this way though. I know it was highly stressful for him and also very confusing because he didn’t know what was happening, I am just grateful that I even had the chance to talk to him after he got on the bus.
My next few days I spent, in bed crying, rolling around, looking at old pictures, crying some more, eating ice cream, and rewatching the same episodes of Criminal Minds because I kept mentally wandering off. I gave myself 3 days to be an emotional wreck, and in all honesty, I think that was very beneficial for my coping. I cried all I wanted, I laid in bed doing absolutely nothing, only leaving to eat and use the bathroom, and I was just sad. But after the third day, I picked myself up, cleaned my room, spent some time outside, and I grew a new appreciation for the world around me. Having Matthew stripped away from me so abruptly and being so lonely caused me to realize how impermanent everything in our world is. Being away from him allowed me to see the big picture in life. I haven’t been that big of an emotional wreck since the end of day 3. Obviously, I still get sad and cry here and there, but letting it all out at once has allowed me to get through the rest of my days moderately easier. Long story short, let yourself fall apart, but don’t forget to pick yourself up.
I write Matthew every single night. That is basically the only form of communication I have control over. Every night I write a letter describing what I am doing, how I am doing, how proud I am of him, and encouraging him. Even before he left, he told me to write daily, but especially after the first phone call, he stressed this even more. Matt’s mom got the form letter about a week after he left, which included his ship and division #’s, his address for us to write to him, and information about his PIR date, including who he wanted to attend. Ever since the day we got his address, I sent out my letters every single day, so hopefully he has something to read everyday, and if not, then he knows that I thought about him every single day. I have stuck true to this writing schedule even to today, and I intend on writing until the day he graduates.
About a week after he left, it was by some stroke of luck that he got to call me. It was on July 20th at 8:30-ish am that he called me for the first time. He needed information from his friends for some documents and luckily (or unluckily) his mom didn’t answer the phone, so I got to talk to him. We could only talk about the documents, not anything else, but it was honestly just nice to hear his voice.
A week later (2 and a half weeks after he left) we got our first real call. It was a Saturday and we got to talk for approximately 25 minutes. That was one of the greatest days of bootcamp. Luckily I had a list going of questions to ask him, because if I didn’t have that list I would've totally blanked. Once he hung up everything was a blur and I was just so happy we had time to actually talk about stuff. Again, he stressed me writing to him on the daily.
The next time I heard from him was Thursday, August 3rd. That was the absolute best day of bootcamp so far. He needed more information so first he called me, but I was at the orthodontist so I could only talk on the phone for like 10 minutes. 15 minutes later after doing X-Rays I look at my phone and my twitter was blown up. Matt had liked all of my tweets, tweeted me back, and DM’d me. Luckily, he was still online and I had the chance to talk to him. I will forever cherish that conversation, and I read it every day. We talked about EVERYTHING, and that conversation lasted about an hour and a half before he had to get off. Once I got home, he called me and we got to talk for another 15 minutes, then that was the last I heard his voice. Honestly we were SO lucky to have that opportunity, it was so rare, and I am so thankful everyday for it. Always keep your phone on you because you never know when they are going to call.
As for letters, it has been a pretty sticky situation. As I said, I write daily, but the SR’s can only send stuff out on Sundays and Federal Holidays. Some people write during the week and send them all out Sunday, but Matt would usually just write me on Sundays. I live pretty close so I know every Wednesday to expect a letter from Matt. My first letter came about 2 and a half weeks after he left and honestly, I was so excited, I bawled my eyes out. They have been coming weekly since then. For Matt, it’s a different story. They get mail most days, but not always. Sometimes it takes 2-3 days between getting mail. He also gets my letters about 4-5 days after I send them. Pretty odd that his letters take 3 days to get here but mine takes 5 to get there, but what can you do. Write to your SR daily because bootcamp is absolutely horrible and the only thing that keeps them going is the motivation from their loved ones back home.
As time goes by, I have been able to get used to being without him (not in a bad way). I cry less, and I am not so much sad anymore as I am incredibly proud. He has made an incredible sacrifice and is fighting for what he believes in, achieving his goals, and It is incredible to see him shine. Being away has only increased our love even more, and has pushed us both to succeed in what we are doing so that we can build an amazing life together.
Now that I am out of my well of sadness, I spend my time preparing for college and making sure I have the tools necessary to create a successful career. I know that’s what Matt wants me to do. Mostly, I am using this time alone to create myself into a better person physically and emotionally.
We are only about half way through bootcamp, but I know this is all going to pay off. We are making each other into stronger, better people, and there is nothing stopping us from achieving our goals. Remember that bootcamp is tough, but it is definitely manageable. Stay Strong.
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