#Reminder that he canonically invests in Bitcoin

[zeravmeta]

god everything about cynthia and cyrus' dynamic is so hilarious across all pokemon canons. they want to fucking kill eachother. cynthia is both completely disinterested and immensely more invested in their rivalry than cyrus is. cynthia both absolutely hates him but also really cares about him and wants to save him from himself while cyrus is on 15 levels of depression and thinks he deserves to die because he didn't score well enough on being an unfeeling machine because he a brief emotion. they're both archeologists competing to see who can reach god first and cyrus only reached it first because he invented bitcoin (made a cult based around a fucking. energy company) and got everyone hooked on it to make a quick buck while cynthia chose violence. cyrus' entire motivation as a villain comes from a place of pain and when he's having a breakdown over how people can possibly torture themselves with the mortifying ordeal of being alive cynthia goes "get over it man why the fuck are you making this our problem" while they're in an alternate primordial dimension with the forgotten diety of said dimension just looking down on them. they were likely not married but they are absolutely divorced because they're so fucking invested in each other and for all that cyrus claims he hates spirit and wants to rid himself of his emotions he absolutely throws away all his pride and postulation to throw hands with her, something that cynthia is very happy to reciprocate even though he quite literally had their creator dieties on a leash. cyrus is ready to die and cynthia is going to beat that self deprication out of him even if it kills both of them. hand in unloveable hand except its them actually throwing hands at each other. these two are both exies and worsties and are ready to kill each other but even then when cyrus asks why people are ok with hurting themselves with the experience of living because you will face far more pain and suffering than happiness cynthia responds because the people around you are worth it and those small happinesses far outweigh every sad moment. cyrus wishes he was as unsalvageable and unfeeling as he claims because he just wants the pain to stop and cynthia is always there to remind him thay yeah hes just another human stop being so fucking dramatic and get therapy. i really wish we'd seen more of cynthia in usum because from the small bits we got she fucking KNEW that cyrus was part of team rainbow rocket but was just like 'yeah ill let him have a vacation with those fruity friends of his he needs to socialize and get some sun'.

[0xeyedaisy]

I was bored and this is a very long post

I felt like rewatching some Tales From The SMP, rn I'm watching the Haunted Mansion, and I also felt like writing down things I find interesting abt characters or whatever, maybe some moments I liked, this is like me liveblogging, except very late and all in one post, there might be some mistakes but I'm too tired to fix em

The fact that all these ppl are Connor's (best) friends and they aren't popular

Also ppl probably already pointed out how this episode was set in the present time, the episode was streamed on march 4, tho I don't remember what was even happening on the smp at the time

Karl doesn't remember being invited, even tho Connor did invite him, also Karl just appeared in the room that didn't have any way of entering it

Connor appreciates Karl being here

Karl, about Francis: Doesn't he remind you of anyone you know?

Connor: Listen, I have a lot of friends in prison and he definitely fits the bill

Francis: Prison???

c!Karl canonically streams minecraft

Joey likes basketball, fav player Michael Jordan

Any friend of Connor is a friend of Joey, he seems to be a friendly guy! (Joey my beloved)

Greg is a nerd (Tho he thinks he's cool)(Francis also thinks he's pretty cool) and only came cuz a couple of ppl insisted upon it

The twins have a lot of milk on them

Connor says Porkums' been through a lot

Francis is a little bitch

Zachery suggested to eat Karl cuz he was walking on the table

Francis said to Rash "It's okay Rash, he didn't mean to forget you", as if Rash didn't get introduced to Karl, even tho he was the first to be introduced

Porkums believes that circles aren't real, only squares

Porkums: Let's do underage gambling! (Porkums for Las Nevadas anyone?)

The twins: YES!!!

Ash loves gambling

Gump stinks (Also he has been switching between a sleeveless shirt and a shirt w/ long sleeves throughout the whole episode)

Tho Greg thinks it's Francis who stinks

Gump took a shower last month

Karl thinks Gump reeks of alcohol

The moment alcoholism was mentioned Glatt appears

Ash says Glatt smells of cigarettes, Zachery says he also smells of bad decisions

When mentioned that Glatt has been dead for a while, Zachery whispered to Ash "Did we kill him?"

Zachery, looking at Karl and Glatt talking: Are they kissing???

Glatt says he reflected on how he was a president of DSMP (?) and read the bible, and now he wants to own a property and become a landlord

Porkums' hat (That Glatt is making fun of) belonged to his mother, meaning she might be dead, or not

Joey thinks Porkums' hat is kinda cool!

Glatt's legs don't work (sometimes?) and his bones hurt

Francis set very close to Glatt (Tbh this is the second time I'm watching this episode and I noticed that Francis might have a thing for Glatt)

Ash doesn't know how to play Duck Duck Goose

Glatt kept saying Duck Duck Go instead of Duck Duck Goose

Greg has been running around for like a minute now

Glatt got sticky knees

Porkums is 36, he got held back a lot (So did Gump)

Francis yet again was standing very close to Glatt

Ppl are being rude to Gump :[

Glatt asked if Gump liked enclosed areas where you can't see sunlight and Gump nodded, so I guess he does like those! Good for him

Glatt has been making a lot of money of off rentals, he also invested in bitcoin at a very early stage

Ppl started making fun of Rash's name and Porkums said to leave him alone

Glatt finds Greg attractive

Connor says there's no universal currency on DSMP, Glatt says they deal in cryptocurrency

Francis doesn't know what a government is

Glatt says he built the Mansion by hand

Connor has bad social skills

Glatt saying Bababooey and yeeting Connor into the depths of hell, I just think it's hilarious seeing Connor's name zooming down

Francis says to Glatt that he's awesome, Porkums calls him a simp

Glatt calls Francis handsome

Glatt throws a grass block on the ground and Francis immediately picks it up

After Glatt makes Porkums disappear Joey yells out "Porkums noooo!!" and Ash says he really misses Porkums, Zachary asks to get Porkums back, Rash (Tho it seems he's generally worried abt everyone, except Joey) also seemed to be worried abt Porkums' disappearance

c!Connor also canonically streams minecraft

Glatt seems to like Rash and Gump as he saves them both from death

Glatt feels bad for Gump, he says that Gump was like him at school, he'd get picked last (Glatt is projecting)

Ash accidentally kills Gump (He fell down the stairs), says that he gets mad sometimes

Gump dies again to the landmines

Zachery says that they should invest in landmines, Ash says he would like landmines for Christmas

Joey and Ash came last in the parkour thingy and Joey said he wanted to make sure that Ash was okay :,]

Francis helped Greg and Karl says they have a lot of "synergy" (?), Ash reckons they're dating

It's Gump's birthday!! Greg says that Gump only showers on his birthday, Gump says it's true (Even tho he did also say that he showered last month, maybe there was a special day)

They're taking a photo!

They're beating the shit out of Gump, it's the birthday punches

Francis is being a little shit (So are the other tbh)

I like how Ash and Zachary sometimes say hi to each other when they finish w/ parkour :]

Joey's full name is Joey Pop

Ash says that Porkums is his hero, Zachery agrees, then they and Joey say that they like Porkums and his hat!! (There are gaps in time between some of these lines)

Glatt loves Francis' mustache

They're now making fun of Joey's hat

Joey says he'll do a kick w/ his skateboard, Karl says that's not what jocks do

Railroad time!!

Francis broke the railroad

Even tho Zachery fell into the lava he didn't die

Glatt has taken Gump

Glatt: For the sake of the lore these are my pliers *Holds a pickaxe*

Joey's fav drink is water

I think Rash and Joey have some kind of beef w/ each other

Zachery fell into a hole and Ash immediately went w/ him and said "Just twin things"

Ash said "Doesn't Gump have kids?"

Karl: Oh, there's a lever? *Sits down on a bed* Now there's a lover

Then Joey sits next to him and Rash sits directly on him

Rash found a nether star and put it on his head and showed it to Karl

Ash for some reason can't bounce

Glatt says that he's changed and that he's better and the best landlord on the planet

Ash said that Glatt should double the rent (Which is 0 for this specific night), and Glatt loved that idea and said that he and Ash should do business together

Glatt called Greg a Lover Boy

Glatt choose Ash as one of the ppl who get yeeted to his lair, saying that he could teach Ash abt real estate and show him real estate tik toks

Ash keeps punching the air in Zachery's direction (DO NOT SEPERATE THEM)

Glatt choose Karl as the 3rd victim and you can hear Rash say his name in an upset tone

Francis sacrifices himself to be the 3rd victim

Francis is chosen to be the one to put the star (Mother fucker really said "Do you grace me with this honor Glatt")

Joey says that he loved Porkums and to stop making fun of him, he was a great guy

Francis calls them Dumb Hat Buddies

Rash and Joey are butting foreheads, they have beef w/ each other I'm telling ya

Francis: You'll be my buddy, Glatt :)

Rash and Joey seem upset about Francis getting yeeted, Joey says he misses his mustache

Glatt was also trying to get Ash, Glatt wanted to teach him real estate, but accidentally yeeted the wrong twin

He also accidentally made Ash disappear, but the kid came back unharmed

Ash is sad :[

Greg says that Zachery should've been named "Rash", so the twins would be Ash and Rash, Karl says "Maybe you should've told that to their Moms", meaning Ash and Zachary have two moms!!

I think Glatt just made a bottom joke towards Greg

Karl keeps telling Joey about liking fire (??? Is that, like, a thing for jocks to do or)

Karl tells Rash that he's strong and correct and Rash says that he has a strong urge to smooch Karl

Joey calls Greg a beast cuz he's good at jumping other cobwebs

Then he calls Greg an idiot cuz Greg was taking too long to jump other a hole

Ash can play piano, he told so Joey

A small part of the mansion has been overtaken by what looks like The Egg (There are a bunch of blocks from the nether), tho there's some green in it and there also was a spider egg in a frame

Karl says that Greg's and Francis' synergy was a lot more important than Rash's synergy, Joey says that Rash gets jealous a lot

Glatt: Are we friends, Karl?...

Karl:*Looks around in silence*

They are going into the lair!

Connor said that all the ppl who got sent into the lair are dead and Ash was saying "Wait..." in disbelief

They aren't actually dead

Porkums is teabagging Glatt's tomb where his dead body lays

Glatt likes being a landlord but he's also lonely

Everyone who got yeeted into the lair seemed fine w/ it and were having fun

Karl says that he hates everybody and leaves

Aaand that's it, I think there's some Inbetween stuff happening after all that but I'm tired and going to bed