#Reg does also do things for James don't get me wrong

[wingsmadeforflying]

Regulus would Pavlov James, end of question. I think James would do it back, but just a slip of Reg's collar exposing his shoulder, or craning his neck to the side to expose his neck? Jams is already at his beck and call, flipping his switch.

James would probably be certain phrases and holding Reg's chin. Reg being Pavloved into either melting or pushing full brat, depending on his mood.

[regulus-books]

warnings: depression, anxiety, arguing, angst, mentions of suicide (regulus saying he'd rather kill himself than see james hurt), mentions of walburga and orion's A+ parenting, tell me if I missed anything.

wc: 1.3k+

notes: I've been craving smth angsty and sad so this is kinda hurt/comfort. the timer thing for reggie is something my brain does too and it's actually so annoying, im not sure if other people go through that but it sucks and I'm here for you:). also the main idea for this was actually from a tiktok here

Regulus can't help it. Their time is almost up. He can hear the alarm ringing in his head, telling him its time to go, it's time to leave. This time, its different. He doesn't want to.

2 years. Consistent. It's been rather healthy, there's no reason to leave, he loves him. The alarm gets louder day by day, his days grow worse and worse and he fears that James knows. James knows how he's feeling, he knows that their time together is up. But, against what Regulus' mind is telling him to do, he stays. He lays in bed. All day long.

James comes home at 17:26, like he always does. Regulus can hear as he places down his bag, and his water bottle. Regulus hears him throw away his trash from lunch and clean the dishes he used, and Regulus can even hear him put away his lunch bag. The sound Regulus dreads the most, though, is James trudging up the stairs, Regulus isn't ready to face the brightness of the sun, he wishes to stay under the comfort of the moon, not harsh, just enough light to get by.

Regulus turns away from the door, their comforter covering his whole body, including the back of his head. The door cracks open just enough for James to slip through.

"You awake, mi estrella?" Regulus wants to stay silent, to not move, to pretend he's asleep. Instead, he does what he knows he should do, and lets out a quiet hum of confirmation. James walks over to the bed, crouching in front of Regulus, finally coming into his line of sight.

James has always been beautiful, there's no denying it. His brown skin decorated with moles and freckles, his eyes big and doe-like, framed by square shaped golden glasses. Beautiful.

"Hi, baby," James smiles, flashing his white smile. Regulus attempts to smile back as James presses a soft kiss to his cheekbone. "Are you feeling sick?"

"No." Regulus answers, quietly.

"You hate to rot in bed, love, why are you still under the covers?"

"I don't know, Jamie, just not feeling too brilliant." James cocks an eyebrow, chuckling softly.

"You're not sick, though?" James unwraps one of Regulus' arms from the blanket, holding his hand.

"Nevermind, it's hard to explain." Regulus shakes his head.

"Okay, love," James kisses his forehead, and rakes his hair back. "Talk to me about it if you find the words. I love you." As James leaves the room once more Regulus simply hums.

The next day, Regulus still doesn't feel right. James was right, he doesn't like to rot away in bed, so he gets up. Instead he spends the time cleaning his house. He should be at work. Fifth day in a row he's called in sick. No new articles from R.A.B are posted in the prophet.

James gets home, normal time, and does his usual routine. Regulus thinks he might smile at how clean their home is, but instead he nearly scowls.

Regulus seats James at their table, he made sure he had dinner laid out so James could eat as soon as he got home.

"What's going on, Regulus?"

"What?" Regulus answers simply, sitting at their large dining table.

"What's going on?" James and Regulus have both finished their meals, the plates discarded in the middle on the table.

"Nothing. The house was dirty, it was bothering me."

"Not the house, Reg, you. You would never clean the house, you hate cleaning. What's wrong?" James' eyebrows knit together, and Regulus is ready to deny it.

"I'm not sure what you mean, James, I got a little stir crazy and the house needed to be cleaned."

"Regulus if you were stir crazy, you'd attend work." Regulus is taken aback by this. He visibly flinches back.

"You're the one that told me I should take time off, James." Regulus scowls.

"That's not what I meant, Reg, and you know that. I mean, yesterday you were in bed all day. You didn't move an inch. I thought maybe you'd take the time to visit friends or something!"

"I visit my friends all the time, I don't know what your on about." Regulus crosses his arms and leans back further into his chair.

"Really?" James scoffs, "When's the last time you and Pandora had a brunch date?" Regulus scrunches his nose and thinks. He doesn't remember. "Exactly."

"What do you want me to say James? It's like you don't even understand me anymore." But James is quick to clap back.

"I don't understand because you never talk to me about anything!" Regulus looks down at his fingers, picking at the skin around his nails, tracing over the veins. "Is this what you want, Regulus? Us fighting all the fucking time!?" James slams his hand on the table, and Regulus can't help but to flinch. He looks at the ground, and freezes. What is he to do?

James seems to notice almost instantly, just as Regulus' lip starts to wobble. "Oh, honey, please, I didn't mean too. I'm sorry, please, baby, I'm so sorry." James walks over to him and kneels on the ground, taking both of Regulus' hands into his own.

"I-." Regulus cuts himself off, trying to keep the tears in his eyes. He can't let James see him cry, not like that.

"C'mon, baby, I didn't mean it. I would never hurt you, I love you, you know that." But Regulus knows all too well that love can quickly be turned into violence.

"Sirius." Is all Regulus can even think at this moment.

"Sirius?"

"Get Sirius." Regulus can muster, his hands tightened into fists, his nails digging into his flesh. James nods, sadly almost, and stands up. He goes through the floo, and he doesn't return, only Sirius stands in his place.

"What's wrong, Reg?" Regulus can barely move his eyes to look up at his brother, "What happened."

That's when Regulus breaks down. He lets his face crumple up, tears stream down his pale face.

"He yelled at me," Regulus sobs into his hands, "and-" he sniffles softly, "and he hit the table." He shakes his head, he sounds so pathetic. "It just scared me, you know? Reminded me of when mama and father got into arguments."

"Oh, Reggie," Sirius holds one of Regulus' hands in his own, pouting slightly. "He's nothing like mum and dad, darling, he'd never hurt you."

"That's the worst part, Sirius, I flinched. I didn't see the look on his face but I'd rather kill myself than see it. He thinks that I think he'll hurt me." Regulus sobs quietly now.

"He's okay, sweetheart. He's with Moony, they're talking about it. What's wrong? Is that head of yours bothering you?"

"It's happening again, Sirius, the bell. It's going off. It's time for me to let him go." Sirius shakes his head.

"Oh, you stupid, stupid, brilliant boy." Regulus almost laughs, "Ignore the stupid bell, it means nothing. You're afraid that he's got better things to do, is that right?" Regulus nods, "Come on, Reg. He's a professional quidditch player, he has a loving boyfriend and an amazing family. What else could he ask for?" Regulus trys to think, but he comes up empty handed.

"I don't know."

"Exactly. His life is nothing short of perfect. He loves you."

"Can you go get him?" Regulus says once he's finally dry of tears.

"I'll be happy to." So, Sirius goes and James comes through the fireplace once more. He doesn't move he just stands there.

"What are you doing, James, come out?" James sighs and slightly relaxes his tense body.

"Remus told me I should give you space." James' face is slightly pink, probably from crying.

"That doesn't mean literally, stupid." Regulus let's out a sigh and opens his arms up. James slowly, cautiously, steps into them, tightening his arms around Regulus' waist. "You don't frighten me, James, please know that." James starts to quietly cry into the crook of Regulus' neck.

"I'm so sorry, mi estrella, I didn't mean to hurt you. I love you."

"I know, mon amour, I know, I love you too, Jamie."

[rweoutofthewoods]

can you talk more about your own experience with bpd in relation to james and regulus in the fics you write? sorry if that was confusing i can’t figure out how to word the question better

Okay I THINK (and you can correct me if I'm wrong) that you mean like how similar they are to real life/if any of it is directly my experience? (plus how it might differ?)

I try to be careful in not making my characters me, so generally the things I pull directly from my own experience are the emotions and thoughts behind it all, which I think are the important part because that's the one thing someone without BPD might have a harder time replicating. You know, the thing you might not be able to nail by doing research or googling symptoms is how it actually feels to live with BPD.

So some of it is pretty universal in borderline, and I know it because I've lived it, but I'm also not writing my own life. THOUGH I am trying to write a realistic depiction, if that makes sense. I follow a lot of creators with BPD, I have friends with BPD, and have spent a lot of time on BPD subreddits so I try to take my experiences as well as those around me and things I've learned from others to paint a better picture of BPD. For example, the one BPD symptom I've rarely experienced is dissociation but I've still tried my best to include it in owcm because other people do experience it, even if I don't. Because the thing is you need 5 out of 9 symptoms to be diagnosed which means not everyone with BPD will experience all of them. So everyone's experience is unique, and my depiction is furthered by what I know, but I try not to LIMIT it to that. Some tiktok accounts I think do a good job on BPD are this and this one if anyone wants to learn more outside of me.

Since it develops as you get older, this is why in my depiction of BPD I write my characters as adults. I personally, noticed my life was being detrimentally affected around 18-19, but I've struggled with mental health since I was 12. And since BPD is largely caused by trauma, it's not like it's smooth sailing your entire life and then suddenly you turn 18 and boom, you have BPD. There are distinct environments and feelings you might have as a child that lead to it becoming BPD. So like in ppp, James always felt like there was something wrong with him as long as he could remember, but it didn't REALLY come to a head until he was an adult. And there were a few parts in Monty's POV in ppp about James' mental health as an adolescent that were similar to my experience, but not exactly the same. Here's a video I think does a really good job of explaining the possible kind of childhood circumstances and how it manifests later in life.

Something of my own experience I've never put in my fics (because I'm very sensitive and careful with this topic) is that BPD can be comorbid with other disorders/illnesses. I don't bring up my other stuff here bc I think it's more likely to be harmful and triggering than helpful or educational, BUT a lot of people with BPD have other burdens as well whether this is another disorder or substance abuse, etc. And that's something I haven't really touched on before, because of course, I am aware that my writing is being consumed by people and as honest as I want to be, I also want to limit potential harm. So my depiction is a little affected by that awareness.

I have a short oneshot (and pretty shitty, sorry.... it was a vent I wrote in like an hour) about BPD james from spring. That one, just because it was just a one-time, throw-it-out-there kind of fic, does come from a lot of my own experiences. There's a few scenes that actually happened to me in there, but I don't/haven't done that in ppp or owcm.

So I guess in short, everything I write about BPD James and Reg are real, but it's not always necessarily my personal experience. The feelings, thoughts, and reactions however, are pretty universal, and even if the events may not be real, they mirror the kind of things that WOULD cause those emotions and reactions. I HOPE this answers your question and I'm understanding it correctly <33

Much love xx

[rollercoasterwords]

Fanfic writer asks — 4, 5, and/or 20!

hi!!

4. Share a headcanon about (character name) in (story title)!

left it open not sure if i'm mean 2 do this for one of my own stories or just any story...suppose i will take this opportunity 2 weigh in on the reg birthday debate & say that i see him as a capricorn. could perhaps be convinced of virgo as well...but that boy is not a cancer sorry

5. Is there a tiny detail in one of your fics that you feel goes tragically unnoticed?

not sure if it's something that's been noticed/brought up before but i don't think it has...i love a full circle/mirrored ending moment so in atydsp the very first line is him being awake + the very last line is him falling asleep <3

20. Is there anything about any one of your fics that you have been dying to discuss but haven’t had the chance to?

oooh idk...honestly zar has been getting quite a few voicenotes recently abt different parts of wfrau so there has been quite a bit i've wanted to discuss lol but some of it is just stuff abt the lily interlude + epilogue that i can't talk abt without spoiling...

i guess one thing i've wanted 2 discuss/one thing that's been interesting to see is (again) the way people have responded 2 the whole james/lily/regulus ambiguity...like i know that much of this fandom revolves around shipping etc but sometimes i've just wanted 2 be like it's not happening!!!!!!!! how can i make it more obvious!!!! but then again that's just part of putting ur writing out there in the world like someone can read something & interpret it completely differently than how u expected regardless of what u do...remember one person commented talking abt how they loved the polyamorous rep w james in wfrau & i was baffled bc in my mind i was writing him as aromantic...also was interesting seeing people expecting jegulily bc i thought i'd done a pretty good job writing reg + lily as platonic lol. also has just been interesting in a broader sense to see the different ways people think abt + interpret sex vs romance...like the idea that james enjoys sex but doesn't find it romantic isn't all that crazy to me bc sex & romance don't necessarily go hand in hand in my own life like. sometimes u just hook up for fun u don't have 2 be in love...but for some people those things r very tied together & it's difficult to conceptualize a guy who just wants to sleep w his friends! so that's been interesting 2 discuss...like the whole expectation that where there's sex romance must follow etc...

one other thing i've been wanting to discuss is like. r&s as they currently stand lol sent a whole long voicenote abt this the other day so have already gotten some of it out of my system but. it's interesting again seeing the amount of feedback from people who really wanted them 2 reconcile + have a happy ending at the point where things currently stand/the conclusion of the main story--or who are holding out for a happily ever after, etc. like to be fair their story has changed a lot as i've written it & i didn't know when i started the fic that the main story would end as it has. that being said ever since the obliviation became a key part of the story i've known that r&s simply would not be getting back together after voldemort's defeat...like sirius genuinely does not love remus anymore bc how could he! he doesn't remember him! they're practically strangers! & remus doesn't wanna give sirius another chance bc why would he! after all the hurt he already went through! knowing that the person in front of him now is essentially the guy who killed the person he loved & took his place! or perhaps more accurately is equivalent to the reanimated corpse of the person he loved...came back wrong narrative etc...u get the point (hopefully). anyway it just seemed clear to me that reconciliation would not be in the cards for them & it felt like brushing past that or trying to patch things up would detract from the emotional impact i was going for...perhaps even diminish the depth of the feelings they did, at one point, have for each other--like, it's only because they cared about each other so much that things are so unfix-able now. of course i do have my interlude + epilogue left 2 play around w but also bc i am mean + contrary + like making people sad every comment of someone being like "please make them happy :((" makes me want to not do that lol

& last thing is just a fun detail abt james that i'm not sure if anyone's noticed...putting it under a cut in case anyone wants 2 put the pieces together themself but a fun little detail abt his death:

james's recurring nightmare abt a bright light + his boggart being that bright light was him seeing his own death <3 bc he lost his ability to see color the 'avada kedavra' didn't look green to him; it was just bright light. & that was the last thing he ever saw! fun <3

fic writer ask game

[itsjaywalkers]

OKAY MY SWEET STARFLY i just finished footloose n you are SOOO right. it's sm better than the original like,,,the dialogue flows a lot better n the soundtrack mmmm so good

obviously i can't consume anything without inserting marauders into it—james is so ren oml!!! willard n him are james n sirius coded ESPECIALLY the montage of ren teaching willard to dance

"do you wanna kiss me?" "someday." JEGULUSSSS you're so right i need a fic of them. regulus as the reverends son??? james as the new guy from the city who just messes everything up???? i need it so bad

sorry, i need to talk abt the scene of ren just going off in the garage,,,to quote my mother who walked in during it, "who would even do this?" all i can imagine is james busting a move n it makes me giggle. that scene will always give me secondhand embarrassment i actually cannot. although, the gymnastic moves really got me cause those were really good

overall the movie was MUCH MUCH MUCH better than the remake n kevin bacon was soo fine in it n i will die on that hill. a 10/10 watch for sure

FIRST OF ALL...... MY SWEET STARFLY IS SUCH A CUTE TERM OF ENDEARMENT . IM LOWKEY OBSESSED . I ADORE UUUU

i'm so glad u enjoyed it <3 like, don't get me wrong, i always have so much fun watching the remake too, but u simply can't compare!! the original is the original for a reason yk?? i think the remake does a decent job of adapting the dance scenes to . more modern dance styles etc etc but that's about it. the only things i like better in the remake are . miles teller (especially him learning how to dance) and the line dance scene!! bc it's iconic!! and that one moment between ren and ariel (u know which one) is so fucking HOT the chemistry is insane and i've seen sex scenes look less like sex than that one sequence of them dancing

THE DO YOU WANNA KISS ME SOMEDAY SCENE MAKES ME SCREAM EVERY SINGLE TIMEEEEE GOD THEY'RE EVERYTHING and yesss you get, it just fits jegulus so well.. reg as the reverend's son + him leading a double life is Perfect.................. AND JAMES BEING A CITY BOY NEW IN TOWN AND TURNING EVERYTHING UPSIDE DOWN HELL YESSSS also ren has THE cocky vibes + some underlaying anger issues !! sooooo james coded imo

LISTEN THATS SCENE IS SO FUCKING ICONIC AND THE DANCE GOES HARD but yeah the secondhand embarrassment is also there and very much real.. i'll always love it tho!! i watched it when i was younger and still a dancer and it had me in awe so it's . special to me <3

IM SO GIDDY ABOUT U WATCHING FOOTLOOSE (the good one) BC I RECCED IT !!! AND THE FACT THAT U LIKED IT SO MUCH !!! BEST THING EVER and kevin bacon looked Perfect i had the biggest crush on him in that movie (still do tbh)

kissing u all over MWAH

[samynnad102687]

Caught in the act (SFW)

@struttingstag

March 14 Prompt: Caught in the act. | 1213 words | SFW version

James just came home from work and he was exhausted. It had been a hectic day and he just wanted to relax. Regulus would still be at work for another hour when he walked in the house and Sirius had texted him to let him know that he had plans with Remus that evening and he didn't know how long he was going to be. Sirius and Remus had just hit their year mark last month and had been talking about moving in together, but they hadn't really made any headway on that front. And don't get him wrong, James liked living with his best friend and his boyfriend but it did make things difficult when James and Regulus wanted to be alone.

James took a quick shower to clean off the grime from his work day and changed into some comfy joggers and the red jumper that Regulus bought him for his birthday. When he went to the kitchen to grab a drink and something small to eat, Regulus was already sitting at the kitchen table.

"Oh, hey, baby. I wasn't expecting you home yet," James replied when he saw him sitting there.

"Why? Did you have somebody else in your bed that I should know about?" Regulus teased as he took a sip of his coffee and pushed James' mug towards him.

"Of course, not. You know you're the only one for me," James laughed lightly as his smile grew on his face.

"Am I?"

"I- Of course, you are. What would make you think any differently?" James was concerned now.

"I'm just teasing, Jamie. I know there's nobody else in the house," Regulus laughed lightly and James took a deep breath. "What do you want for dinner?"

"I don't know. What do you want?"

"Pizza?"

"Sure."

They ordered a pizza and some chicken wings from the new pizza shop down the road. It was delivered quick enough and they settled in on the couch to eat. Regulus had also gotten out the wine before he turned on the telly and started to flip through the channels. After he found nothing that he wanted to watch Regulus turned the telly off and turned towards James. And James knew that look like the back of his own hand.

James was nervous. He didn't want to make Sirius upset but he also didn't want to upset Regulus. His boyfriend had been begging him to do it for the last week and James' resolve was cracking. He didn't know how much longer he would be able to hold out before he inevitably caved to Regulus' begging.

"Please?" Regulus asked again for the third time in the last ten minutes.

"What if he catches us? I really don't want to be in the dog house with your brother... again. Once was enough," James whined.

"He won't know, besides Sirius isn't supposed to be home until at least later tonight, based on what Remus told me the other day. We have the whole house to ourselves."

"When did you talk to Remus?"

"Last week. He said he had a date planned for them. Something big I'm thinking, if the smile he failed to hide was anything to go by. I'm pretty sure we are safe for a while."

"I don't know, Reg. Every time I even think about doing something that could hurt him, he always seems to know. I don't know how but he does." James was fidgeting with his ring.

"I'll make it worth your while, Jamie," Regulus replied with a tone dripping in honey as he sat up on his knees on the end of the couch and ran his hand gently down James' chest making him shiver.

"Oh. Oh, that's not fair."

James threw his head back onto the back of the couch and groaned. He knew if he looked into Regulus' deep grey eyes when he was like this then he was going to crack within a second. James could already feel the fissures forming. It wouldn't take long and Regulus knew that, based on the smile he had when James chanced a glance at his boyfriend. Regulus was crawling over James' legs and dropping all of his weight down onto his lap. James closed his eyes.

"You know you want to," Regulus whispered into his ear as he ran his lips along the shell of it.

"You're going to be the death of me, love," James groaned, refusing to open his eyes.

He knew what would be there when he did. Regulus would have his best pouty face with the puppy dog eyes that James could never say no to. It was an evil tactic and it worked every single time. James took a deep breath before he slowly tipped his head back down and opened his eyes to find exactly what he thought he would.

"If we get caught," James started slowly, "I won't hesitate to blame you."

"Oh, I know," Regulus beamed as he got off of his lap and gave James his signature smirk before he walked back to the kitchen.

They didn't even make it ten minutes before the door was slammed open and Sirius let out a shriek that could be heard in every room in the house and probably outside as well. James groaned as he ran his hand down his face, knocking his glasses askew. He looked at Regulus, who was now sitting with a scowl and his arms crossed over his chest. As soon as James looked over at Sirius, he started his tirade.

"James?! How could you? And with my brother of all people." Sirius was flailing his arms all over the place.

James thought about actually blaming Regulus like he said he would but he didn't have the heart to.

"It's not what it looks like," James tried after a few moments of contemplation on what to say.

"Really? Let me guess, he just happened to crawl into your lap and you couldn't help it. Is that what you were going to say?"

"Well..."

"James, don't you even confirm that you fell victim to my baby brother... again."

James didn't say anything and he could see that Regulus was trying not to laugh beside him.

"James?"

"Hmm?"

"I'm waiting," Sirius said firmly as he tapped his finger on his now-crossed arms.

"Do you want me to lie to you?" James asked after a minute as he tried to hold back the smile that was threatening to appear.

"I can't believe you. You said it wouldn't happen again."

"I know that but he is very convincing," James tried to defend himself but Sirius just glared at him and he looked at Regulus for help.

"Will you fucking calm down, Sirius?" Regulus grumbled. "It's not like we can't restart it from the beginning."

"That's not the point, Reggie." Sirius sunk into the chair opposite them. "We were supposed to watch it together."

"Yeah, well. You weren't home and I wanted to watch it." Regulus shrugged his shoulders in nonchalance.

Sirius gaped at him and James groaned again before he picked up the remote and started the next episode of Peaky Blinders over again. Regulus curled into James and Sirius grumbled something about them being traitors but got comfortable in the chair anyway.

Also posted on Ao3: Tempting Choices

[theinvisiblemuseum]

jegulus!

MY FOREVER BOYS <3

What made you ship it?

literally yaz i'm not even joking this was before we even knew who the other was but i'd heard jegulus murmurings, i started wywm, and the rest is history

2. What are your favorite things about the ship?

they're just so well matched??? granted we don't know much canonically abt reg and james but like... even with what we do know... IT FITS SO WELL IN CANON??? and arguably makes their canon characters a million times more dynamic???? i love that they can be written super angsty and it will make sense and i love that they can be written super fluffy and it would make sense and i love the combination of the two and ahhhh i just love them so much i can't be properly coherent about it. they just make sense to me the same way wolfstar does. of course they'd be together. of course.

3. Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

most of my unpopular opinions would get me killed but i will say this: i'm an intellectual now and i dislike the sun metaphor. yaz converted me. i don't dislike a rogue comparison here and there but i dislike how much it's been overwrought to the point that it actually takes away from both regulus and james' characters. i also don't like regulus being cruel and james putting up with it. i'm fine with banter and bickering and whatnot but when it borders on verbal abuse or james always being in the wrong for everything it makes me ://

[birlwrites]

hi! it's me, the person who had the very confusing birthday! uh so i got dumped which in and of itself, I'm not v upset abt (it needed to happen, we just aren't v compatible as a couple, and if he didn't break up w me, I would've broken up w him), but I am a bit upset it happened on my birthday :/// but I digress!

im really curious about how the light scions will view regulus's side, vs Dumbledore's! I know that in ur previous posts, you've talked abt how Sirius hasn't even told his friends abt the dark arts, and I just thought it would be fascinating to hear what u had to say abt, say, James and Remus, and how they feel abt Dumbledore. for the marauders, I'm pretty sure Sirius being on regulus's side will make all the difference, but that also makes me curious about light scions who aren't friends w Sirius or regulus?

I know this is probably not going to happen for a while but I also can't wait to see how Dumbledore would react to there being a third side, and how he might change his recruitment strategy to account for ppl who are sympathetic to muggleborns, but aren't against the dark arts

getting dumped on your birthday does seem like it would sting. yikes. my sympathies for that, but also yay for something happening that needed to happen!

ohohohohoHO alright so first of all - i'm not going to talk much in this response about how dumbledore is going to react to there being a third side. you're correct that it's not going to happen for a while, and tbqh how he reacts depends a LOT on the shape of regulus's side by the time that dumbledore finally finds out about it

which is an elaborate way of me saying that like. i have the general sketch of how dumbledore's going to respond, but it's not fleshed out enough for me to really be able to ramble about it afjlsghskfj - i leave my outlines very flexible because i make a lot of decisions as i write, and i'm just not close enough to that point yet to really know how it's going to go

okay but now back to the first part of your question! namely: if you believe that dark arts are bad/evil/wrong/associated with blood purists........ how do you view regulus's side versus dumbledore's?

i'm going to start with james and remus because oh my god fASCINATING. (these are the things i think about in class)

first james: as you've said, sirius being on reg's side will make all the difference for him, tbh. or like, enough of it. but let's say - look, james is part of the sacred 28, okay? he's part of that fraction of the sacred 28 that isn't part of the dark network, but he is still sacred 28, his father is still in the wizengamot, his family still attends society events, and--okay my point here is that james has grown up learning some THINGS about house black.

and also about dumbledore.

let me bullet point these out:

house black:

super old, *pristine* bloodline, to the point of disowning people who marry blood traitors

dark arts follow them like a shadow - centuries ago, the blacks were rather open about practicing them, and nobody's forgotten

uptight power-hungry purist assholes, mostly

dumbledore:

defeated grindelwald, an incredibly powerful dark wizard (and fanatical blood purist, no surprises there), which catapulted him into legend status

uses his positions as headmaster of hogwarts and... y'know, whatever sway he has at the ministry (my brain is tired and i haven't so much as breathed on canon in quite some time ajfslkghkdf) to champion muggleborn rights and fight against blood purist institutions

a whimsical fellow :)

oh, and some context on dumbledore's role in the war - of course *we* know he's the head of the order, and regulus knows he's the head of the order, and voldemort knows he's the head of the order, but most people don't know about that. the order of the phoenix is a vigilante group - they may share common goals with the DMLE, but they're still operating underground, so it's not a Known Thing that dumbledore is in charge of them. (not that it surprises anyone who learns the truth, because again, legend status, government sway, etc)

so that's james's background information on the leaders of these two sides. also, he does not like regulus on a personal level, for reasons i went into........... somewhere.

oh my god afsjlghdkfj this is going to have to be multiple posts. i can't go into detail about james's thought process on this post and then also talk about remus and then also talk about most of the general population of hogwarts and also magical britain, it will be a dissertation

the important thing to note with james is that he has never, ever been put into a situation in which he needs to question his own belief that dark arts = evil. sirius is bending over backwards to keep james from needing to question that (although sirius is mainly doing it to protect himself - and that's not to say that james is completely blissfully unaware of sirius being a tad uncomfortable around the topic of dark arts, but that's a whole other post). so james's first impression of regulus's side will be....... let's call it Not Positive. (and he does interpret dumbledore's side as The Good Ones)

but people practicing dark arts are different from dark *creatures*, aren't they? moony can't help being what he is...

which brings me to remus!!

remus got the same messaging that james did about house black and dumbledore, but it wasn't nearly as strong for him, because that's just.... not the world he moves in. like, yeah yeah yeah, some of the noble houses do/have done bad shit, the headmaster of hogwarts beat a dark wizard in a duel. he knows all of the same INFORMATION that james does, it's just that remus didn't grow up around these people, so it always kind of remained in distant mental territory, you know?

remus is a dark creature, which doesn't make him pro-dark arts. not at all, actually. he can't help what he is, and he never had that choice, and it boggles his mind that some people CHOOSE ~the dark side~. he associates that with pain and suffering and just bad things in general, on a very visceral level

oh and here's another thing that's going to give remus even more trouble: he owes a LOT to dumbledore. dumbledore permitted remus to attend hogwarts, which means dumbledore gave remus access to friends, magical education, a shot at eking out some sort of non-awful existence in the magical world, and most importantly, dumbledore TRUSTED remus to use this chance wisely

(i think dumbledore did genuinely want remus to have the same opportunities as other magical kids his age, or at least as close to that as possible. i also think dumbledore was very, very aware of the debt of gratitude he was incurring upon remus, and his family, by making this happen - he just wasn't sure what would come of it. then the war broke out, and he was like 'ah yes perfect i could use a werewolf who feels indebted to me')

so remus has a lot of trouble with the idea of dark arts being something good or desirable, and he also has a lot of trouble with the idea of going against dumbledore's side - not the order necessarily, i specifically mean *dumbledore's* side.

and sirius being on regulus's side does make a huge difference, but remus is wrestling with some very gut-wrenching internalizations here, and that's never easy

with regard to everyone else:

i think the perception of 'dark arts = blood purity' is so strongly interwoven into magical culture that when Normal People™ find out about regulus's side, their first reaction is going to be HUGE amounts of cognitive dissonance, because 'wait what do you mean they're doing both, that's impossible/ridiculous/contradictory--isn't it?'

which means regulus's side coming out into the open (which will not happen for Quite some time) will *really* shake the foundation of the war, in a way that will not please voldemort or dumbledore. both voldemort and dumbledore (and the sides they represent) benefit from this dichotomy, and when regulus fucks it up, he fucks up a LOT of their strategies for recruitment, image, rhetoric, etc.

suddenly, things are possible that weren't supposed to be possible. the world is different. and voldemort and dumbledore do NOT APPRECIATE THAT

[limetimo]

RAB fics I read 18-30 Dec

Harry Potter and the Prisoner(s) of Azkaban by Trex_patronus Regulus survived the cave and went to Azkaban, got cell-mated with his brother, made friends with Kingsley and now Harry has to deal with 2 escaped azkaban prisoners :D Love the Black Bros interactions, as always TRex delivers phenomenal siblings dynamics!

You, Me & Everyone Else by ygmoony Remus and Regulus become friends, somehow, and everyone somehow comes to the conclusion they must be dating :D

The Bureaucratic Error by Iniga sooo Regulus is pretty much very very dead but he gets a great angsty subplot within Sirius' journey. Anyways Remus dies in Battle of Hogwarts, runs his mouth at Death and is sent back to 1993! The only other "Remus time travels to the past" fic I've read so far was the one where he time travels to 1970s with Hermione (that one slapped too). It's Romadora, but I thought it was pretty nicely done.

Domestic Fluff (literally) by Zoya1416 cute one shot about Regulus and his girlfriend buying fabrics!

Waters Run Deep by knight_bus_of_doom ♥♥♥♥♥ They pull 19yo Regulus out of the cave, the catch? It's been like, 16 years. His (already older because of time travel) boyfriend Severus is married to his brother (for reasons) and dating his friend Remus (Reg is very okay with this). It makes more sense if you read the first part of the series, but you don't have to. But I do recommend because aaaagh my heart

Sky Full of Stars by TowardTheStars Severus/sirius modern hollywood au heavy themes of child abuse so keep an eye on warnings

The Journal of Regulus Arcturus Black by gokioh Regulus is dead. When Narcissa decides to disown Draco in order to distance him from the freshly ressurected Voldemort, Draco becomes the title of Lord Black and with it Kreacher's services - and Regulus' journal. It means Draco learns about the reality war and the Horcruxes early on and does everything he can to protect fellow Slytherins (and other students) from it.

This Is Why I Hate Mondays by AtomicMint funsies ♥

Teenagers Scare The Living Sh*t Out Of Me by LimeOfMagicLimo re-reading my own WIP so that I don't write something totally contradicting. Regulus is such a haughty little shit, boy get a therapist i beg you. also crookshanks. and ginny and tonks and aushldaush Bill/Fleur are CUTE

Kiss (While Your Lips Are Still Red) by LimeOfMagicLimo Regulus who has been sentenced to Azkaban for murdering Walburga receives a Dementor's Kiss but he Kisses the Dementor instead. To cope, teh Universe yeets him to Another Universe, where he's like... I guess... time to kill Voldemort again to keep Kreacher safe

What could have been by Phantomwriter2182 harry time travels and recruits regulus, snape and severus to hunt horcruxes with him

career goals: tyrant by justwhatialwayswanted :D :D :D I love supportive-of-their-politically-ambitious-son parents walburga and orion :D also Regulus' crush on Evan alfhlů

melodrama by moonymoment jegulus were a thing yada yada stuff happened, James survived Voldemort, pulled Regulus out of the cave and now they're about to fuck some shit up

Whatever happened to the young, young lovers? by georgia_sk *laughing maniacally* Regulus went lonely gunfighter at Voldemort's ass and then set his dead body and destroyed horcruxes on fiendfyre in front of Dumbledore. Then he made up with Barty, rescued his bestie Evan from Azkaban, started mending his relationship with his brother and developed a crush on James bloody Potter. Dumbledore is trying to be meddlesome and continue his game of chess but Regulus is not having it ♥

Let’s make the most of this by jelfulry trans single mama sirius texts wrong number (remus) and Regulus is an overprotective little brother

No Tears to Damn You by tenrousei_kuroi motherfuckerrrrrrrr this was DARK. Regulus hears rumours that Sirius is going to be expelled (because the Prank) and goes to sort it out because their parents would flip the fuck out. Turns out Dumbledore is willing to let it go... if Regulus sucks him off. Slughorn sees and continues the sexual abuse. And then Sirius finds out.

my breath rips out in rags by ScreamingFae sexy jegulus times

Drugs and surgical scrubs by anauro modern au doctor Regulus recovering addict james ♥♥♥♥♥

to the dark lord by justwhatialwayswanted Regulus is PLOTTING and I love it

We're older now, the light is dim by Winter_Oswin Lily and James are in the afterlife and see how mistreated Harry is, and they will not stand for it. With Regulus' knowledge of souls and tethers they do a little push and pull act and force their way back to the land of the living. They're now forever connected by their souls in unexpected ways, but they don't mind at all.

when you were mine by sequinhaze  modern au single dad james ft house arrest Regulus ♥♥♥

Strikers (takes two) by aureusprongs FOOTBALL! after turning down a pro offer regulus moves back to england and enrolls sirius' uni where he immediately butts head with no one else but James Potter. James has a massive crush on Regulus from the get go but he's a little stupid about it :D

En Avant by bluerosebouquet Lily died, James is grieving, and then he goes and falls for his son's ballet instructor.... who happens to be his best friends' estranged brother... I love the emotional depths of this fic

There's A Place For Me by WalkOnThroughARedParade  quidditch team bonding!

All Together Ooky by WalkOnThroughARedParade  Remus/Regulus, short

Trimmed With Care by WalkOnThroughARedParade christmas decorating with sirius and regulus

Best Served With Milk by WalkOnThroughARedParade :D Remus takes Regulus home for Christmas, Hope Lupin has my heart

Slip A Sable Under The Tree (For Me) by WalkOnThroughARedParade  sexy jegulus times in santa costume

Signed, Sealed, Delivered by WalkOnThroughARedParade  sexy and sweet jegulus times

On The Eighth Day Of Christmas by WalkOnThroughARedParade  sexy jegulus times

The Long Game by lackadaisical_lizard regulus can't fucken believe james potter wormed his way into his life like this. damn mcGonagall and her obsession with Regulus being a part of a club. jock/artist jegulus highschool modern au

Puppy Magic by DemonBanisher, thefifthmarauder17 the potter household is CHARMED by the handsome widower and his son Teddy and can't help but adopt him. The catch? Remus and Teddy are muggles.

Gods Under Broken Skies by IndigoIrisis Regulus died and yot back in time and you know what? He's got no more fucks to give. He's living for himself now, and to hell with his parents and the dark lord.

The Pure Taste of Love and Lust by just_a_whorecrux  Orion/Regulus blackcest underage rape

For the Right Price by tenrousei_kuroi sirius gets captured by rudolphos lestrange. BUT, he's willing to let him go... for the right price... for a price Regulus is willing to pay. with his body

The Marauders and the Prisoner of Azkaban by SilverShadow1 this was a good take on the "characters read the books" but there was too much direct quoting from the hp books and it got taken down :/ not sure if it's still available or where

Forgotten Last Words by DEMH_works 10yo draco malfoys finds a letter, from Regulus to Sirius, and decides to send it even though his parents said he can't be in contact with cousin Sirius.

To Have And To Hold by WalkOnThroughARedParade  jegulus quickie at wolfstar's wedding

Dancing Through Life by orphan_account wolfstar and jegulus on stage of a sign language musical

Waves of Magic by xivz Regulus is dying of cancer and decides to use the "im dying" [there was a word. i know there is a word for this. i cannot recall the word] to make Sirius have a talk with Walburga and also to realise he's been dating Lupin for the last million years

[sophsicle]

Tell me, does James’ love for Regulus involve a failed hero complex, a “saving people thing” that Harry has?does he feel uncomfortable with his emotions in regards to Regulus. Heseems happier n fulfilled with Lily. I feel like Reg was a detour which I know is wrong as you said he loves both equally. He feels desperately when Regulus is mentioned and rest of the time, it’s like he neatly locks it away and goes about obsessed with Lily n Sirius. makes me lol a bit and alsomarvel at his maturity.

Hello lovely! Yeah, absolutely. One of the reasons that James lets Regulus off the hook for things is that he's so caught up in this idea that he's going to save him that he isn't willing to accept anything that might get in the way of that. The Mark is the thing that really just doesn't allow James to make excuses or live in denial anymore. There's that first paragraph of the fic where it's all "people make mistakes but they also make choices". Leading up to James finding out about the Mark he's desperately trying to find a way to forgive Regulus for his part in Mary's attack because he isn't ready to accept that there's someone out there he can't save - because that's not something he's ever had to face before. The thing about the Mark is that it forces James to accept that what happened with Mary wasn't Regulus making a mistake, it was Regulus making a choice, a choice that fell in line with his choice - and Regulus makes it explicitly clear to James that it was his choice - to get the Mark. Basically it's a pattern of Regulus choosing his own personal survival over what is morally right, and Regulus once again makes it clear that it's a choice he intends to continue to make (and that he thinks James should also considering making). And it's at that point that James realizes he's "failed". So yeah, hero complex plays a big role in James's relationship with Regulus. I think that Regulus sees himself as a detour in James's life, but it's a bit of a self-fulfilling prophecy because I don't think James ever sees him that way. Regulus always thinks of them as being doomed and so he kind of dooms them just to get it over with but James definitely doesn't. Despite all Regulus's rejections he fully believes he's going to save Reg right up until he sees that Mark. I don't think he feels more fulfilled with Lily, but I do certainly think that being with and loving Lily is much simpler.

[judgement-free-sideblog]

Ghosts from the rainforest

Summary: A simple rescue mission will bring him back to a place full of nightmares, and maybe this time he could find redemption. Situated in 1975, 2 years after the events of Skull Island.

Warnings: Violence, blood, wounds, mentions of war, cursing, implied smut, smoking, angst.

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 6: Family

The piercing blue eyes search for you in the dim light that came from the sunrise outside the shack, he found you and attempt to stand up getting down immediately from the pain.

"Don't even try" You said to him, sad to look at his face covered in dry blood and a still fresh cut on his cheekbone. Two days after arriving Walker had decided to inspire moral in his troops by beating him and putting you to treat their wounds "I suspect they broke one of your ribs when you call them bastards, also even if you could move there is also this" you pointed to the fetter around his ankle and he looked at yours too, your shorts were stained from the truck and the dirt floor of the shack, and the clear sign of a lash on the naked skin that you cover with a blanket when he looked at it.

"How is your head?" He asked finally trying to sit still "How long have we been here?"

"It has been better, it will take more than that to take me down, don't worry" You said taking a piece of cloth and wetting it on a small bowl "Well after you passed out I kept fixing a couple wounds here an there in the camp, so he won't kill you, that was three days ago, at least they left me this to fix you up, hold still" You approach as much as you could to him and start cleaning up his wounds.

"I have nowhere else to be love... hey!!" He pull apart when the alcohol touch the open skin, and gave you a panicked look when you show him the suture you will use to close the cut

"Oh Captain don't be a baby" You hold his face on your hand while continuing to clean the cut "You must be used to deal with vicious animals like that by now, because that frien of yours can call himself a man"

"You are right, Walker is a poisonous snake who will kill anyone on his way, the only reason we are alive is because he believes he may get something valuable out of you, which reminds me, what did he ment by next time he'll go for the throat?" He had his hand was clenched and his eyes firmly shut down when you passed the needle trough the skin.

"I have met Walker before, Shukri used to help him pass his weapons and stuff through the border so he send me as a symbol of friendship, but the man he wanted me to help die, wich of course he will because he had severe sepsis and many bullet holes, and I'm far from being an actual medical doctor"

"You really have a way to reassure people" He joke and you rolled your eyes at him.

"Anyway he went crazy and kill the men Shukri send to guard me and stab me in the stomach, and leave me for dead in the jungle, thankfully it wasn't a cut deep enough and I managed to walk to the next village". You finish and he looked at you surprised by how casually you talk about those horrible memories. "What does he meant by your taste still being constant?" His face darkened and the guilt and remorse appear again in his eyes. "I'm sorry, I didn't meant..." You tried to stand up but he grab your wrist and you sit next to him.

"As I told you Jenny's mom was the lover of a British ambassador, and we actually met before we were send to find her, one night Sargent Walker was drunk and tried to force himself on her, and I stop her" He said with a sad smile on his face.

"You were together? You and her mother I mean" You tried to hide a hint of jealousy in your voice, it was funny that in this threatening situation you could still be thinking about you two.

"Of course not" He said and a grin of satisfaction show on his face when you sigh in relief "Although I had feelings for her, and maybe she had them too, but I knew I had a mission, then Walker betrayed us and Jenny die... well I guess she blamed me for it" you didn't say anything and just let him lay his head on your lap, the fetter was biting in your skin and your ankle was about to start bleeding but you feel the need of comforting him.

"How could you look this handsome aan peaceful cover in bruises, and cuts?" You ask yourself outloud after a couple minutes once you thought he was asleep.

"I could ask you the same Y/N" He responded opening his blue eyes, and you almost pushed him down but remember his bad shape. "Don't worry, the guys are looking for us, they will get help in Borneo and come back"

"That's what I'm afraid of, I heard them talking about asking for ransom money to the US Embassy in Borneo, what if they get too late, he is gonna kill me when he realizes I lie to him".

"I will like to him try" He said trying to stand hurting himself again.

"Easy there prince charming" You said holding him still and locking your hands together in the process, neither of you trying to pull apart. "I do know what I will do if we actually get out of here".

"And what is that?" Conrad asked trying to ignore how helpless your if was.

"I'm writing a strong worded letter to Houston Brooks about the terrible job of his tracker, since he keeps trying to charm the women he works for" You said and he smiled at you.

"Is it working?" He asked, trying to incorporate.

"Maybe" you said but before you could follow your instinct, some loud steps approach to the shack and you gently put him on the floor to curl in your corner pretending to be asleep.

"Ibu? Cepat! Kita perlu pergi" Mother? Quick! We have to go A young boy enter the shack carrying a big shotgun, and he open the fetter setting you free.

"Dia akan datang bersama kami" He is coming with us You said and he went to set a surprised James free.

"What is going on? Ibu?" He asked once you help him stand up, he was not as hurt as you thought since he could walk without help, but he was definitely not in his prime.

"You have your family Captain, I have mine" And since that explanation was not enough you had to continue "One of the men guarding me years ago was Shukri's nephew, he hates Wlker ever since, and has many of his children inside his little army so he can eventually sell them to the authorities"

"He is a layered man isn't he?" He said while you and the boy help him walk outside the camp, another infiltrator was already waiting next to a truck ready for you to flee, waving in the distance, and then the sound of a thunder brake the morning air, and he made a funny surprise face, and a blood stain start growing in his chest and he just fall on his back, and then all hell broke loose.

Walker men were following you, and since James was hurt it was so little that your young hero could do for you.

You run into the jungle just to be stopped in an open area where a tree had fallen an then four men were surrounding you, ready to kill.

"Drop it big guy!" Reles voice said, making your hear stop and race with happiness. The man in front of you turned around to meet Reels surprised by how calm he was.

"Didn't you listen? Drop it!" Slivko said coming out of the jungle with another six guys that you were sure were part of Shukri's village.

"I got you doc" Glenn said passing between the men who were already unarmed.

"I'm fine, help the Captain" you said and without thinking you took one of the weapons that had been dropped in the ground.

"I thought you didn't like those" Slivko said while Reels help the boy tie Walkers men.

"Desperate times Reg" You said, and hug him. "How did you find us so quickly?"

"Oh wow, sorry Captain" He said looking embarrassed "The guy, the weird guy that says he is your husband he meet us half way when we came after you guys, apparently one of the guys here told him what happened and he came with us and many men along to help"

"I knew it! Wait a minute Shukri is here?" You hold your breath because the feeling that something was wrong was strongly hurting your chest, and Conrad's words about Walker resonated in your ears.

You run back to the campsite, the ambush had worked out, the rest of Walker's men were dead or prisoners and unarmed, only their Sargent was too stubborn to surrender and both him and Shukri were aiming at each other in the middle of the camp. Shukri with a shotgun and Walker with two pistols.

Again without thinking and with the adrenaline running through your veins you pointed your gun at him and order him to drop it. As all response he aimed one of his pistols at you.

"You can't win this" You said to him not backing off and looking James concerned face approaching, but he was not looking at you, all his attention seemed to be focus on Shukri.

"Oh I know that doctor, but I have a question for you, who will be faster? Me or this little idiot here who came to rescue his princess??"

Things happened in the fraction of a second and by the time you understand what have happened both men where in the ground.

In the moment Shukri nod to James and he jump to take you out of the line of fire, Walker shoot his guns missing you, but not Shukri, but he didn't miss either.

"Hey, hey Shukri man, come on" Mills said approaching pressuring the wound, you stood up and walk away from James who was breathing difficulty from the jump, but overall okay.

"Shukri, you win, he is dead, please don't give up now" You said now no longer holding on the tears.

"Tears? Isteri if I had known that this is what I needed to do I would have let someone shoot me long ago." He said holding your hand with almost no strength. "Captain Prince charming?" He called for James and he kneeled by his side respectfully "Anda menjaga isteri saya" You take care of my wife

"I will" James said solemnly, and Shukri nod, then he hold your hand tightly and then after one last breath he and a quiet smile to you he was gone.

After a couple minutes people dispersed and you could hear his men arranging how will they move him, but it was wrong and you couldn't yet set what had happened in your brain, after one hour you felt like if you keep looking long enough he will smile again and wake up to tease you and life will be normal again.

"It's time" James said but he didn't force you to stand, he only gave you his hand, and stood there waiting, after a minute that felt like an eternity you took his hand stand up, and then you let all your unspoken feelings to come out, about Randa, about Shukri, about watching him almost be beaten to death two days ago, you cried and cried and he simply hold you, even when his rib was probably killing him, even when you were nothing to him but a job, he keep holding you.

[itsjaywalkers]

ok so i think about nothing happens jeggy all the time and i think i've figured out why i am so much more judgemental/less forgiving of james cheating on his gfs than i am of regulus cheating on his bfs (other than the fact that he's older and initiated it the first time)

regulus is just so in love with james and i imagine he would leave his bfs in a second if james said he wanted a relationship with him. even though there's no excuse for cheating, at least it seems like he is trying to move on but is just so in love with james that he can't stop himself

but with james...it kinda seems like he wants to have his cake and eat it too. like the fact that he could be dating a girl and think she's the One but still think it's ok to be fucking reg on the side seems so disrespectful to both reg and his gf. expecting regulus to always be available to him while he potentially plans a future with his gf and also expecting his gf to be ok with him being OBSESSED with regulus seems so much worse to me than 'ok i'm cheating on my bf and i know its wrong but i'm in love with james so i'll always choose him' ya know??

don't get me wrong i love them both and think they're both at fault but the way james justifies it to himself/thinks it's ok is icky to me

and that's completely valid nonnie!! i've said it before and i'll say it again: james is awful in nothing happens and . kinda unlikeable . it depends on the person, a couple of my friends (dil and shan) absolutely adore nothing happens james and support his rights and wrongs (mostly his wrongs). but he's an asshole most of the time, so i was expecting him to get . a lot of hate . and fairly so!! he deserves to get beaten up!!

u made very good points here and regardless of me agreeing or not with all of them, it's always so very interesting to me to see other ppl's perspective of my characters!! i don't think james' motives are as . mean as u made them out to be, and he isn't exactly justifying himself bc he isn't even aware that he's cheating in the first place bc he doesn't see it as such/reg is always his exception but . what he does is Wrong, doesn't matter what reasons he has for it, or how well-intended he is

i do think it's easier to sympathise with reg bc we see everything from james' pov and he literally . worships him . thinks he's the best thing that ever happened to mankind . and always paints him in a good light!! james isn't a reliable narrator, so u gotta take everything he says with a grain of salt (sometimes a lot more than that) but you'll see more of that in future instalments!!

i can't speak much on . if reg would actually leave his bfs if james asked or if james is playing both sides bc it's easier/bc he wants to take more than he can chew bc it'd be a bit of a spoiler but !! so funny to me this is the impression it gives u, i'm glad i'm doing a decent job <3

anyways, thank u sm for reading nothing happens and for leaving me this ask!! i really love to discuss this kind of stuff with u guys, and to see what ur getting from the story or even who do u like/dislike and why!!

hope u have a nice day <333

[sophsicle]

I was just rereading chapter 46, and dude. Sirius really hates Reg, huh? I mean he’s only polite to him to get info, then he has a bunch of aurors chase him down the street, and he doesn’t even spare him a thought afterwards when it switches to his POV. Like damn. The difference in the way Reg thinks about him and the way Sirius does is astronomical.

Hello lovelies! I mean, I think that moment in chapter 46 needs to be read in context, Euphemia and Fleamont Potter have just been murdered by Death Eaters, and not only is Regulus one of them, but he is protecting them. Standing there refusing to tell Sirius who did it. Remus and James both tried to convince Sirius that Regulus really did love James and yet here he is, once again, choosing the Death Eaters over someone he supposedly loves, which feels a little too familiar to Sirius. I think people sometimes forget that all the vulnerability we get from Regulus as readers Sirius doesn't see. He can't hear his thoughts and he's not there in those moments with James. With the exception of the Veritaserum incident, Regulus doesn't really let Sirius in very much. And when Sirius tries to talk to Regulus about that moment of vulnerability, we end up getting this:

“Bella, that day, the last one, she wanted you to torture me, you remember?”

After a brief pause Regulus nods.

“Would you have? If dad hadn’t stepped in? Would you have done it?”

Eventually Regulus sighs, running a hand over his face before meeting Sirius’s stare.

“Yes.” So yeah, Sirius gets the Aurors to chase after him, because his brother is a Death Eater who at the end of the day, at least from where Sirius is standing, will always do the wrong thing if it's what suits him best in the moment. Which makes Regulus a danger to people. Like I don't think Sirius is in the wrong here. ALL that being said, Sirius doesn't hate Regulus. Like if Regulus was on the tracks and a train was coming Sirius would push him out of the way, y'know? But their relationship is complicated, they have both let the other one down at some point, and they're on opposing sides of a war, so things are a little tense. In the end I sympathize with both of these characters for different reasons and I don't really think one of them is more in the right than the other (where their relationship is concerned). But also it would be great if they could communicate with each other. Just. Once. :)

[sophsicle]

Your reply to the last ask got me thinking… I wonder how Mary would think if she knew what Reg had been through in terms of SA and similar abuse growing up. How would it make her feel to find out that he knows what it’s like to be in a situation like that? That he’s been dealing with it for most of his life? I get that he did a terrible thing by erasing her memories and trying to get his friends off the hook, but I also think the situation would’ve been a lot worse for Mary if Regulus hadn’t gotten involved. Is there any chance she’ll ever find that out? That he did step in and try to protect her (albeit in a twisted sort of way)? It’s hard for me to be really angry at him or resent him in this situation for some reason. I think it’s because he’s just so young, and his messed up introduction to sex can’t have helped this. I know you’ll probably say he’s only a year less than Mary and the others, but I feel like at that age, one year makes a big difference. Anyways, love your story, and thanks so much for keeping the asks on despite some not-so-nice messages. I love reading your insights and getting to know you and your thoughts better!

Hello lovely! Yeah, I mean it's a very messy situation. Because Regulus does "save" her right? Like he does step in and put a stop to things, he does get her out of there and take her to get help. I 100% think he is young and he is traumatized and he is in a really precarious position. As I've said before his experiences with SA really prevent him from being able to fully accept/acknowledge what's happened or what his friends have done as a form of kind of self-preservation. The thing is, I don't know how much of a difference any of that would make to Mary specifically. Not to use a totally inappropriate reference here, but I don't know if you've ever seen that clip of Andy Samberg from B99 where he goes "cool motive still murder", but I think, at least from Mary's perspective, that kind of describes Regulus in this situation. Like interesting backstory, explains a lot, but it doesn't change what you did to me. It was my hope that we the audience would be able to view the situation and Regulus's role in it complexly. That given all we know about him we could understand why he would make the choice he did even if it's the wrong choice, even if we disagree. I wasn't trying to make Regulus unsympathetic I was just trying to show how his life experiences have led to him lacking a very clear or functional moral compass. I wanted the audience to understand him while not condoning him, but I don't know if it's fair to ask Mary to do that. That's sort of what I meant in that last ask when I said that Mary doesn't owe him anything. Like after what she's been through it's not really her job to try to understand him. And, y'know, I don't think she does anything to him that is completely unwarranted or like terrible. Mary won't ever find out that Regulus stopped what was happening in that dorm room, partially because there's just not really an organic way for that information to reach her, but also because I don't necessarily want to make her have to forgive him, y'know? Like we already have James who is kind of the audience, who knows Regulus's backstory and who is sympathetic towards him, I don't think we need that from Mary too. That drifts too much into letting-him-off-the-hook territory. Thank you for the ask, this was a really great question! :)