#Rael Hyskaris

[avirael]

The Price of Failure

“Seven hells, A‘viloh! Open the damn door right now! I am worried about you, you idiot!”

After Haurchefant’s death the Miqo’te had locked himself up in a room at the Forgotten Knight and had barely spoken to anyone at all these last few days.

Go away - This is all my fault - They must hate me so - Stay away from me - I don’t want you to get hurt too.

With this and similar sentences, which Rael had day by day only heard muffled through the closed door, A’viloh had tried to get rid of them. Rael had expected the Miqo’te to blame himself for what had happened, they had even understood that A’viloh in his bizarre sense of self-loathing had decided to leave Fortemp Manor to not cause anyone any more pain. Anyone except himself of course.

Once again Rael felt so powerless seeing how A’viloh apparently saw all his fears confirmed, that as soon as he was involved in something, everything would eventually go horribly wrong and people would get hurt. Of course that was nonsense. But with the “evidence” at hand - and the poor Miqo’te really was a pretty unlucky fellow in this regard - it was also quite difficult to argue against it.

Seemingly he had also stopped letting Rael convince him of the opposite as they usually had so far. At least he had still talked to them. Through closed doors, but at least he had not ignored Rael entirely in another attempt to drive them away.

Well, not until today…

Another time Rael’s fist loudly drummed against the door.

“I swear, if you don’t open this damn door right now, I will break it down!”

Maybe getting angry at him was not going to encourage him any more than politely asking had but by now Rael’s patience reached its end.

“You are looking for the young Miqo’te, who’s living here since a few days, don’t you?”, a voice asked and Rael turned around to find the owner of the inn standing at the end of the corridor. “I saw you two together with mistress Tataru before.”

“I am.”, Rael confirmed and tried to look a little less like some hooligan about to trash the inn and attack its guests. “I am just worried about him…”

“Mhhh…”, the Elezen made a contemplating sound. “Well, all I can tell you is that your friend left a few hours ago and hasn’t returned since.”

“Left?!”, Rael blurted out, while their mind began to race. “To where?”

“That I don’t know, I am sorry…”, the man apologised.

It may have looked impolite but Rael left in a hurry without another word. Barely back outside they paused and realised that Ishgard was too big to just aimlessly run around and look for him. But where could he have gone?

At First Rael hurried to the chocobo stables. Somehow they had hoped to find him here cuddled to the bird Haurchefant had gifted him. It had been a naive hope, that of course proved wrong.

Then they ran to the city gates asking the guards if they had seen a person fitting A’viloh’s description leave the city and after that they did the same at the airship landing. Both times unsuccessful.

By now the sun, that had spent most of the day hidden by thick grey clouds, was slowly surrendering her last weak rays of light to the darkness of night. The lack of light would make searching even more difficult and Rael was out of ideas. Where else would A’viloh go?, they wondered when one last horrible idea crossed their mind.

As fast as Rael could they hurried back to the upper parts of the city, where at its highest point stood one of the most important places in town: The Vault.

The place where Haurchefant had been killed while trying to protect A‘viloh.

In a way it would be just like A’viloh to return here, if only to inflict more pain on himself and punish himself in the process. However as Rael walked towards the tall building they noticed the entrance had been sealed with a barrier and additionally a guard was stationed in front, informing Rael that the building remained closed for now due to ongoing investigations of the happenings around Thordan and his knights.

The guard hadn’t seen any Miqo’te around either and so Rael began to wonder what to do now. They could return to Fortemps Manor and ask Alphinaud and Tataru for help. Maybe even Artoirel and Emmanellain. Or go to the headquarters of the Temple Knights and speak to Ser Aymeric. Although every soldier in the city searching for A‘viloh possibly was a little exaggerated, this idea began to look more and more tempting to Rael with every passing minute. There was a nervousness inside their heart, a bad feeling, that was getting worse and worse with every passing second.

Rael had just walked down the first set of stairs when suddenly something in the cold night air changed. A strong breeze picked up, wind howling through the streets like a ghost. Feeling the strangeness of this sudden change Rael looked up to the night sky, where for a second they thought they saw the form of a bird circling in front of the glimmer of stars.

Then they blinked and it was gone. A shiver ran down Rael‘s spine. The feeling familiar but nonetheless in this case strangely unsettling, they gasped and almost stumbled. Their vision blurred for a moment and their eyes turned milky white, as Rael‘s mind was forcefully pulled away by a sudden vision.

Rael found themself standing on a square somewhere in Ishgard. It seemed familiar and Rael thought they recognised it from somewhere near Fortemps Manor. The air felt unreasonably chilling even through their warm clothes and Rael only slowly adjusted to the feeling of having a vision after none of them had shown up for so long.

Then Rael saw A’viloh.

There he stood, only a few steps away, at the edge of the square, where the higher parts of the city bordered onto the vast, foggy nothingness of the Holy Sea. But the Miqo’te’s tear-stained gaze was not focused on the bottomless depth below, but on the moon and the stars above.

This world… wouldn’t it be better off without me in it? No one would miss me at all…

A‘viloh did not say this aloud but Rael heard his voice just as clearly as if he had spoken instead of just thought it. It made Rael’s blood freeze in their veins.

Like petrified they watched A’viloh slowly raising his arms as if they were wings, like a bird that wanted to take flight.

Just that he wasn’t flying.

He was falling.

In an unnaturally slow motion he tilted forward, falling into the abyss and while Rael began to scream he was already gone.

[avirael]

Happy Halloween!

Best All Saints‘ Wake wishes from the Little Red Riding Hood and the grumpy Devil he encountered on his way through the enchanted forest 🤭

(The apple thing is totally another fairytale though, A’vi…)

[avirael]

Confessions

It was almost like one of these dreams where you thought you were falling and woke up with a jolt. Rael’s scream and the image of A’viloh tilting forward over the edge and into the abyss - a falling sensation Rael themself had suddenly felt like it was their own - violently pulled them back from their horrible vision.

For the short moment it took to regain a sense for what was real and what was vision, Rael howled as if in pain, raising a hand to their mouth and almost falling to their knees.

Then, as they suddenly realised the imminent danger A’viloh was in, a shudder went through their body and their head shot up. As quick as Rael’s feet would allow it, the Viera jumped up and raced towards the place they had seen in their vision - hoping that it was not too late already.

Out of breath they reached the corner of the square from their vision only a few minutes later. Their burning lungs and muscles were nothing against the painful stab in their heart as Rael noticed that A’viloh was truly standing at the other side of the square. They had hoped the vision had all just been a strange imagination and not reality but there he stood, just like they had seen it.

The coldness crept back into their bones and a horrible feeling of helplessness threatened to make them freeze, while all of Rael’s thoughts only screamed one word. No!

Not sure what to do, with no idea how to prevent this disaster, how to convince A’viloh that he was wrong, Rael quickly moved closer. Loudly but in a soothing tone, though their voice was involuntarily shaking, Rael forced themself to speak up.

“A’vi…”

The Miqo’te at the edge of the plaza flinched and then slowly looked over his shoulder a little, as if the voice alone hadn’t been enough to tell him who was standing a few steps behind him.

“Rael?”, his thin voice asked and his face was covered in frozen tears. With a sudden wave of despair Rael realised they had no clue what to say. No idea how to fix him.

In their mind they already saw him falling...

No! No, this could not happen!

“What are you doing here?”, Rael asked as casually as possible, like there was a perfectly fine explanation for all of this.

For a second A’viloh seemed unsure, then he looked away.

“Nothing.”, he lied.

Rael decided not to point out this obvious lie and instead calmly asked, “It is cold, is it not? Should we maybe go somewhere else?”

But the Miqo’te remained silent. His ears stubbornly folded back, he avoided Rael’s gaze.

“Would you at least step away from the ledge a bit? Please, A’vi. Let us talk.”, Rael pleaded and offered a hand for him to take.

“About what?”, he asked with a strange voice, unusually serious for him. “There is nothing left to talk about…”

Rael could feel how they were slowly loosing him. But the right words didn’t want to appear in their mind. Only panicked yells and pleas.

“You cannot do this…”

“Why not?”, he asked sadly. “No one needs me anyway…”

“I need you, A’vi.”, Rael almost yelled.

But the Miqo’te shook his head and looked the other way again.

“No you don’t. I’m just a burden for you! This has to end before anyone else gets hurt…”

“None of this was your fault!”, Rael exclaimed, the despair all too audible in their voice.

A’viloh, with his back turned towards Rael, made a sound the Viera could not quite distinguish, a sound somewhere between a sharp laugh and a desperate sob. “Sure, keep telling yourself that. Quite a lot of horrible coincidences, don’t you think?…”

The way he said that made Rael angry. They knew that yelling at him probably would only make things worse but before they could stop themself the words were already out.

“You have got to be kidding me! You are such an idiot, A’vi! An idiot and a coward! Don’t you dare to tell me this is for other people‘s sake when in reality you are just too scared! Too scared of moving on and too scared of getting hurt again! You have not understood a single thing Haurchefant was trying to teach you. He wanted you to be happy, A’vi! Happy!! Do you honestly think he would want this? That any of the people you think you failed would want this? Are you too blind to see that their sacrifices were made so you could live? That they sacrificed their lives for you because they loved you? And now you egoistically want to throw your live away just because it hurts?!”

As a heavy silence settled around them, Rael already felt that this had been too much. With a new wave of tears welling up in his eyes A’viloh turned around and stared at Rael with a peculiar expression. A mixture of shame and anger for being called out like this but also hurt and a certain kind of stubbornness too.

“Maybe!”, he sobbed and finally admitted the truth. To Rael and to himself. “Yes, maybe I am scared! Maybe I am just a weak little coward! Excuse me for not being as clever and brave as you! But nothing you say will change that it’s not fair that they are dead and I am not! That whenever I look back all I can feel is the pain of what I lost. And it will also not change that I could never be happy knowing that all of this was my fault!”

Rael felt like they had messed this up entirely. Their eyes started to burn as they stepped closer reaching out for him. “I am sorry… A’vi… I did not mean…”

“No.”, A’viloh replied gloomily and was about to turn towards the ledge again. “I am sorry…”

“Wait!”, Rael suddenly yelled and then said something they had not expected to speak aloud themself.

“Haurchefant’s death was my fault, not yours!”

A’viloh froze.

This was Rael’s last chance, they knew this. Maybe A’viloh would hate them, maybe Rael’s magic would forever be lost if they broke this one rule. They did not know what would happen and they did not care. Not as long as it possibly could save A’viloh.

“I knew it would happen.”

“What?”, the Miqo’te muttered confused. “What do you mean?”

“It means that I lied to you.”, Rael admitted guiltily. “…and that we need to talk. Please, A’vi, step away from that ledge and let us talk.”

Visibly shaken by this confession A’viloh furrowed his brows. “No, you’re just trying to… Why would you lie to me?… I don’t understand any of this…”

With one last deep breath Rael finally revealed the truth. “I have visions of the future. I knew Haurchefant was in danger because I saw it. I saw it and I still failed to stop it. So instead of blaming yourself for his death, you should better blame me.”

Like a lost child A’viloh simply stood there entirely puzzled, like all of the sudden he found that nothing he believed made sense anymore and he didn’t know what to do or say next.

“Visions? Of the future?…”, he repeated as if these words lacked any meaning to him.

“This is why I knew you were here too.”, Rael confirmed as calmy as they could, while their heart was hammering in their chest. In a desperate attempt to convince him they stretched out a hand one more time. “Please, let me explain everything, A’vi…”

For a horribly long moment nothing happened at all. Everything was silent and motionless like frozen in time. Like fate had not quite decided yet which path it would choose.

Then hesitantly the Miqo’te made a step towards Rael and took their hand. Immediately he was pulled a few steps away from the cloudy abyss while Rael wrapped their arms around his body with a relieved sigh. A’viloh neither returned Rael’s embrace nor rejected it.

As Rael finally let go of him they looked him in the eyes and said, “I owe you an apology.”

“First of all you owe me an explanation.”, A’viloh replied blankly and Rael nodded in agreement.

Without letting go of his hand Rael talked for a long time while A’viloh just wordlessly listened. About how Rael had always heard the whispers of Golmore, about the visions that had led them on their journey, and finally about the omen they had seen but not taken serious enough before Haurchefant’s death. Rael did not try to justify their mistakes but at least they wanted to explain that their powers weren’t properly working anymore this far away from home and also why they hadn’t told him all of this a long time ago.

To Rael’s surprise there was no sign at all to signal they had broken the most sacred rule there was for the Viera. No sharp wind to bite them and no thunder striking down to punish them. Everything just felt the same as before. A’viloh on the other hand…

The thoughts racing in his head were plainly visible in his eyes. How his mind tried to make sense of all of this. “You mean you knew that all of this would happen before it even did?…”

“Not everything…”, Rael tried to correct him but A’viloh didn’t let them. There suddenly was something in his eyes, in his voice. Not exactly anger, but hurt? Disappointment?

“But you knew from the very beginning what kind of journey this was. That it would be dangerous and that people would get hurt. And you asked me to help you anyway…”

“Yes but -“

A’viloh’s ears folded back again and he almost hissed as he interrupted Rael.

“No! You knew all along that I don’t belong here. That I never belonged here. That I never wanted any of this! All I ever wanted-”

His voice broke off as he made another of these sounds that was half sob and half laugh.

Rael would be lying to themself if they said all of this had never occurred to them. Maybe they had just chosen to ignore it. But now that Rael thought about it, it made perfect sense. When they had seen him among the people of Silver Bazaar A’viloh had looked happy. As happy as Rael had rarely seen him at any other occasion. Had they possible demanded too much from him? Had he only tagged along for their sake when in reality all he wanted was to go back to a more peaceful life?

Rael didn’t know what to say. There was nothing they could say or do that would make him feel better. They just sadly looked at him as he shook his head and said, “I thought you were my friend…”

“But I am…”, Rael affirmed while also understanding how betrayed he probably felt.

“No.”, the Miqo’te said sharply. For another moment he looked at Rael, his expression full of disappointment. Then he turned around and walked away towards the lower parts of the city.

“Wait! A’vi!”, Rael called while fear rose up inside them again. “Where are you going?”

“Back to where I should have stayed before you talked me into all of this nonsense!”, he hissed without stopping or turning around.

Then he was gone and Rael was left alone.

They hated how hurt he had looked.

But they rather knew he hated them but was somewhere safe, instead of dead.

[avirael]

Vierapril 2024

Day 03 - Wish/Rest

As many viera Rael doesn’t pray to the Twelve but believes in nature and it’s spirits instead. At special places, like the resting spot of a treant, Rael would pause and not only wish for the Shroud to find peace but also for a sign leading their way.

[avirael]

Vierapril 2024

Day 09 - Reflection

“Do you ever look into the mirror and wonder where you would be now if you made other choices?”

“Your choices had good reasons. Don’t ever regret following your heart. Our choices made us who we are now and I wouldn’t want to be anybody else.”

[avirael]

I can no longer hide the updated version of smiling Rael from you 🤭

(Still struggling with lighting…)

[avirael]

Vierapril 2024

Day 22 - Shower

Rain in Thanalan is a rare thing. While A’vi complained, Rael smiled. The rain meant life and Rael could almost hear the plants and animals sing in joy about the precious water. How much more alive this land would look once the dark clouds had passed.

[avirael]

Vierapril 2024

Day 01 - Regal

„Huh? A‘vi said important people were visiting and I should behave while he‘s gone. So… how may I help you?“

(Sadly I had no good idea for the „belonging“ prompt and this is the fanciest outfit I could find that didn’t look stupid. I like the color and the shine of the fabric)

[avirael]

Khian an I were joking around about how Rael sometimes gets very protective of A‘vi (rightfully so) and then she made this meme!

I love this! It makes me laugh every time I look at it because it’s so ridiculous and funny but also so accurate at the same time!! Their expressions, especially Rael’s! 😂

Screenshots taken by Khian

[avirael]

Vierapril 2024

Day 27 - Past

Rael in Golmore spending their time alone in the forest being surrounded by animals like a Disney princess 🤭

(Sadly it looks a little obviously photoshopped but it was so much fun to edit this picture anyway!)

[avirael]

Vierapril 2024

Day 12 - Treasure

“There is more treasure in books than in all the pirates’ loot on Treasure Island […] and best of all, you can enjoy these riches every day of your life.”(Walt Disney)

Rael considers their collection of books and also knowledge in general a very valuable treasure.

[avirael]

More wonderful screenshots Khian made for me a while ago! Even though the background is dark and almost mysterious the colors are still so warm. 🥰

I love how cool and determined they both look here! And the pose with them back to back is sooo good! It’s a nice symbol for how they can always rely on each other and where one goes the other one isn’t far away either 🤭

[avirael]

FFxivWrite 2024

Day 10 - Stable

Rael’s morning had started pretty normal, or as normal as it had gotten since the four of them had moved to Ishgard. Apart from the servants Rael usually was the first person in the house to be awake, so when they went downstairs and passed the dining room to get to Lord Fortemps personal library, there were only a few other people around yet doing their daily works.

One of the maids, who by now seemed to have remembered Rael’s habit of getting up quite early, greeted them friendly.

“Good Morning, Master Rael! The cook should have your breakfast finished in a moment…”

After the bathing (and dressing) incident on their first day here, a few of them had tried to call them Mistress Rael for a few days but the Viera had quickly tried to stop them from doing so. After demanding to just call them Rael and a few exasperated questions of “What else should we call you then, my lady” (somehow that was even worse!), they had reluctantly decided to call them Master Rael instead and Rael had simply rolled their eyes and accepted their fate.

Apart from such difficulties everybody was extremely friendly and accommodating though. Rael had insisted they didn’t need any special treatment and could absolutely wait until everybody else was awake too to have their breakfast but nonetheless the servants had developed a habit of preparing it early for them anyway.

“Thank you very much.”, they replied with a nod. “I will get some books from the library and then come to the dining room.”

“As you wish.”, the woman answered with a short bow and hurried away. Rael would never get used to having servants around but had long stopped questioning why this seemed to be normal here in Ishgard.

As announced they went to the library and fetched two books that had caught their interest a few days ago before returning for breakfast.

The first few days here in Ishgard Rael had usually left the house very early, at least if the weather allowed it, and wandered the still silent city looking for a place that felt… familiar. A place to recharge, to rest, to meditate. But it had proven difficult, so they had simply stopped trying after a while.

Breakfast turned out not to be a horrible alternativ though. Of course the Ishgardians exaggerated even that immensely in amount and effort but this was fixable by speaking to the cook fortunately. So Rael didn’t get any fancy dishes with luxurious ingredients and heavy sauces unless they ate with everybody else for once.

A clear soup (against the cold the servants insisted), some fruits and a slice of bread were more than enough for such an early hour.

All of that was accompanied by a cup of tea, although here in Ishgard they had quite different habits of making tea it seemed. It was mostly milk, yak milk as Rael was told, in which some dried tea leaves simmered for a while. The first time Rael was served this it was quite unusual and also horribly sweet due to the maple sugar the servant added to it but without the insane amount of sugar it was drinkable. Still a little thin due to being mostly milk but nonetheless tasty.

They had barely started eating, while browsing through one of the books, when hurried footsteps echoed down the hallway. Confused Rael looked up as A’viloh appeared in the doorframe with a grin on his face.

“There you are! I was afraid you left already!”, he exclaimed.

Rael wrinkled their brow, looked to the clock and back to A’viloh. It was way to early for him to be awake already and especially so joyful about it.

“Don’t look at me as if you’ve seen a ghost! Yes I’m awake already! It’s a wonderful day, isn’t it?”, he beamed and sat down beside them stealing a rolanberry from their plate.

“Someone’s in a good mood, huh?”, Rael observed while still trying to focus on the text they were reading. Not that they disliked the fact but it was strange. Then their conversation from the last evening returned to their mind and their reading was instantly forgotten. Closely they squinted at A’viloh observing every little movement on his face…

“What?”, he asked, still grinning. Suspicious…

Dismissively Rael shook their head and returned their attention to the breakfast before casually saying, “I assume you had a nice evening?”

“I did, yes…”, he replied before he realised the tone in the Viera’s voice. “Wait! No!!”, he blurted out and blushed a little, “I mean it was a nice evening but not whatever you mean!”

Even the maid chuckled and Rael was pretty sure that A’viloh was the only one unaware about the rumours everyone kept repeating behind his back. For some reason Rael preferred these over people mistaking A’vi and them for a couple…

“Really? Why the sudden good mood then? Not that I’m objecting…”

“I have a plan! I got up extra early so I would catch you before you run of to the astrologian’s guild or elsewhere.”, the Miqo’te explained while stealing yet another piece of fruit from Rael’s plate. “But you will have to put your boring books down for a while…”

“A plan?”, Rael repeated unimpressed. “For what?”

“You will see soon enough!”, A’viloh grinned. “Alright, put that book away. You can eat the rest of your breakfast on the way!”

“On the way to where?”

But he ignored them and instead turned to the maid. “Is it possible I can get one of these sandwiches too?”

She was already halfway out of the door when he jumped up and yelled, “No, wait! Don’t worry, I’ll go myself! There’s something else I need!”

Just as fast as he had appeared he was gone again, only stopping at the door one last time to look back at Rael.

“Hurry up! We’ll meet in a quarter bell in front of the house!”

Confused the Viera kept staring at the now empty doorframe before turning their still quizzical gaze to the housemaid, who just shrugged too.

***

Rael had only quickly finished their breakfast and went to their room to fetch their bag and grimoire, before heading outside as they were told to. Just as they opened the front door A’viloh hurried out of the corridor that led to the kitchen, throwing a bag over his shoulder and stuffing a sandwich into his mouth.

“Good, you’re ready! Follow me!”, he commanded between bites and began to walk without giving any clue where they were going.

For a while they just walked in silence. About one thing so far A’viloh had been right. By Ishgardian standards the weather was really nice. The sun had just risen and now shone from a cloudless blue sky, the morning air was still crisp but maybe it would be a little warmer today than usually. Their path led down the roads and staircases to the lower parts of the city where they crossed Saint Reinette’s Forum and finally passed the Skysteel Manufactury.

By then Rael realised they could only be headed for the Chocobo stables, or the Holy Stables as the Ishgardians called it. Rael had never understood why they needed to add the word holy to all and everything. Well, they had understood but found it completely ridiculous! It was just a normal stable like any other, maybe the birds there were a little more special but there still wasn’t anything divine about it!

“The stables?”, Rael asked, wondering if this was everything A’viloh had been so secretive about.

“Yes! You need to see the Chocobo!”, he answered excitedly. “But that’s not everything… First things first, though! Come on!”

Impatiently he waved for Rael to follow as he showed one of the caretaker a piece of paper he pulled from his jacket. With a short bow he let the two pass and left to get the chocobo.

A moment they waited before the man returned followed by a tall dark-feathered bird in Ishgardian barding. He handed the reigns to A’viloh and left again, going back to his work, while A’viloh happily greeted the bird who chirped at him in return.

“Isn’t she pretty?”, he asked proudly. “I still can’t believe Haurchefant gifted me a chocobo! He said her name is Chloé but that I might change it if I want to. But I kinda like it…”

Admittedly Rael didn’t understand much about chocobo breeding but to them it looked like an especially beautiful bird, with shining black feathers and attentively sparkling eyes.

“Indeed a very pretty bird.”

“Did you hear that, Chloé?”, A’viloh addressed the bird cheerfully and ruffled the feathers at the side of her neck. “Rael thinks you’re pretty too!”

As if she understood, the bird fluttered excitedly and turned her head towards the Miqo’te so he could pet it some more. Then the Chocobo kwehed and turned her curious eyes to Rael who in return stepped closer and scratched her beak.

“Haurchefant said she can fly too.”, A’viloh said. “I haven’t tried yet… Would you like to?”

“Me?”, Rael asked, although the idea of a chocobo that could fly seemed interesting. “It’s your chocobo.”

“That doesn’t seem fair. She could be our chocobo!”, A’viloh offered. “I’m not sure if she could carry both of us at once though…”

“She is quite tall, so maybe she could…”, Rael mused. “But this was your gift A’vi. It is a kind offer but I am not sure if it would be alright to accept it.”

A’viloh shook his head.

“Haurchefant surely doesn’t mind. He gave me the idea for this trip after all!”

“Trip?”, Rael asked confused.

“Oh yes! And we should go or we will miss the airship!”, A’viloh explained. “We will spent the day at Camp Cloudtop. I mean, if you want to, of course. But I thought it would cheer you up since you liked that place…”

“I do…”, Rael was a little speechless about the fact that A’viloh seriously seemed to have put thought into a plan to cheer them up.

A’viloh beamed and held up his bag. “I even brought food! We can have lunch at a nice spot like the one we found last time. You can collect some more flowers or herbs or whatever and we can see if Chloé can really fly!”

As happily as not in a long time Rael smiled and was grateful for having such a kind friend.

“Thank you A’vi, that sounds like a wonderful idea…”

[avirael]

FFxivWrite 2024

Day 02 - Horizon

Sometimes you do what is best for others and not for yourself. Sometimes what is best for you requires a lot of work first or you need to be brave enough to seize it, because good things rarely come for free. And sometimes what you think is best for you turns out to be not at all how you imagined it.

It was not like Rael regretted a single thing that had led them here, absolutely not. Their journey had been incredible, although also dangerous, and they had seen so many wonderful places their siblings in the Jungle probably couldn’t even dream of. They had walked the colorful markets and plazas of Rabanastre before the empire had turned it into a ghost town, lived among the Au Ra Xaela of the Azim Steppe, traveled through Yanxia with all its small beautiful villages and so many places more.

Most of these places however had been under the control of the Garlean Empire. Rael knew that it was best to evade contact with the imperials and at first they had tried to stay away from them as far as possible. Rael knew how to survive alone - how to find shelter, what to eat and what not, how to hunt. But Rael had also learned from the guardians of the sanctuary how to move silently and remain unseen. Because of their young age Rael wasn’t as tall as grown up viera and when they kept their ears hidden they looked like a normal Hyur at first glance. Like that Rael managed to sneak into places without being recognised and remain out of trouble. And if ever trouble came their way, Rael could still count on Frelsi to swoop down from the sky or a whispering gust of wind to warn them early enough to avoid problems.

Traveling through areas without Garlean presence was a lot easier though and the people usually also were a lot more open and friendly. So after traveling through Yanxia for a while, always on alert and careful not to be seen by any soldiers, it had been a relief to finally find a ship that was willing to take Rael across the Ruby Sea and to Kugane.

For some reason Hingashi had been able to avoid the greedy grasp of the empire so far by declaring themself neutral regarding the conflicts of their neighbours, but Rael wasn’t sure how much neutrality really meant in the end for a nation that so brutally attacked and oppressed one country after the other. They tried not to think too much about that while they stayed here but couldn’t help but be reminded of their own people who fought daily to keep the invaders out of Golmore and their homes free of occupation. Kugane instead had allowed the wolves entrance into the city just like it did for everyone else as long as they kept the peace - a stark contrast to the viera who tolerated no outside whatsoever in their territory.

But this openness came with the opportunity to finally be able not to hide beneath a hood or hat anymore. Nonetheless viera seemed to be a relatively uncommon sight here in Kugane still. Often enough people stared at Rael or small children excited ran to their parents and pointed at Rael’s long viera ears. But by now Rael was used to that and it all seemed harmless, so Rael assumed as long as they stayed careful nothing bad could happen.

Kugane was an amazing city. So different from anything Rael had seen before and full of things to learn. The people were friendly and life seemed easy here - one could almost forget everything beyond the Ruby Sea. However to Rael‘s disappointment outsiders weren’t allowed to leave the port city. The rest of Hingashi, both the smaller island of Shishu as well as the bigger island of Koshu were forbidden for foreigners. For a few days Rael considered sneaking out somehow and already scouted for good opportunities, but in the end they decided that it wasn’t worth the risk. It was a shame though they wouldn’t be able to visit the capital city, Bukyo, or the Daitenzan moutain which they had heard was an amazing sight.

Instead Rael decided to spent some more time at the markets and the embassy district to hear about the news the merchants and travelers brought to Kugane and learn about new interesting things and places. They especially loved spending time at the tea houses and the stores that sold herbs and medicine. At the later they could still learn a lot and in returned offered some of their knowledge and recipes. Occasionally they even could make a few coins there by helping with potions and offering healing spells to customers.

It was on one of these days that Rael met a merchant from Radz-At-Han. He was an elderly man but still lively and more energetic than his body sometimes seemed to allow him. Apparently he had wanted to help with carrying the cargo off of his ship and had badly twisted his back while doing so. Rael had offered to help him and so the two of them got into a conversation. It seemed the man had seen viera before but still was curious to find one here in Kugane, so Rael told him a bit about their journey - leaving out some important details of course. In return they asked how the man knew about the viera and so he had for his part talked for a while about his travels and about Radz-At-Han.

It sounded like a fascinating place and by now Rael felt like they had seen everything there was to see here in Kugane, so when the man offered payment for Rael‘s help, the viera refused to accept his money and instead asked for him to take them with him to Radz-At-Han. The merchant agreed on the condition that Rael would help to load the goods he bought here in Kugane onto his ship and give him a list of herbs that would help with his pain.

And so it happened that only two weeks later Rael found themself aboard a ship headed towards Radz-At-Han. While they were excited about the city already, it also was a strange feeling to travel west again for the first time in a long while. After a few weeks and about half their journey one afternoon land appeared on the horizon. It was the southern coast of Dalmasca and with a sudden ache in their chest Rael realised how close they were to their home again in this moment.

There had been moments before where Rael had missed Golmore. Moments where they had been frustrated about the lack of clear instructions regarding their task. But their journey had been so interesting that all of this had always been quickly forgotten again.

But never before had Rael felt this homesick.

Never before had they felt the burden of their task so heavily on their shoulders.

Never before had they wished to just go back home.

To feel the moss beneath their feet and see the lovely green and warm brown colours of the forest.

To hear the songs of the birds and wind rustling through the leaves.

To smell the scent of the Jungle and freshly cooked food.

To see their mother smiling at them.

Desperately Rael fingers clawed into the railing of the ship as they stared to the distant shore. They breathed in shakily and suddenly felt tears running down their cheeks.

With an alarmed caw Frelsi fluttered down from the crow‘s nest, as if the raven had felt Rael‘s pain, and landed on their shoulder. Then it made a soft croaking sound and rubbed its feathery head against Rael‘s tear-stained cheek.

„Oh, Frelsi…“, Rael almost sobbed and raised one hand for the raven to hop onto. As it did so and curiously titled it’s head at Rael, the viera careful began to pet the pitch-black bird. „Don’t you miss our home too?“

Another caw, a little louder than the last one. For a few moments Rael hesitated and just stared at the bird on their hand before raising their gaze back to the shore of Dalmasca slowly vanishing behind the horizon.

„Would you fly home for me, Frelsi? Say hello to the forest and to Kelta for me?“, Rael whispered silently.

The birds ruffled it’s feathers and made a clicking sound with their beak. Carefully Rael put it down on the railing. „No, it’s alright. You must be homesick too. You can go, if you want…“

Frelsi flapped it’s dark wings a little but only when Rael made a shooing gesture it took flight. Restlessly it flew a circle around the viera before landing atop of their head, right between their ears.

„No!“, Rael exclaimed frustrated. „Don’t you understand me? You can leave!“

A little less gently then before they plucked the bird from their head and tossed it into the air.

„Go, you silly bird!“

Angrily the bird cawed, fluttered around and landed on the railing again.

Rael sighed.

„Please, Frelsi. Please fly home for me and keep an eye on my mother. I will be alright without you…“

Slowly the raven tilted its head and for a moment the two of them stared at each other. Then Frelsi blinked and took flight on silent wings.

A single black feather loosened from its plumage and slowly drifted down for Rael to catch it.

With a sad smile Rael turned the shiny dark feather between their fingers and watched Frelsi get smaller and smaller before vanishing on the horizon.

„Godspeed, my friend. Be free, fly home, go wherever you want. This is my burden and not yours…“

[avirael]

FFxivWrite 2024

Day 22 - Return (Free Day)

A part of Rael thought that all of this was going to smoothly. Or maybe for once they were simply lucky. Not only had they been able to free Flame General Raubahn from Ilberd’s imprisonment, it also seemed as if Sultana Nanamo truly wasn’t dead. Not only were this very good news on its own but it would also absolve the Scions from all accusations that had been made against them - public or not.

Going back to Vesper Bay and the Waking Sands still felt peculiar and so did hiding Raubahn there, but Yugiri had assured them that she herself had checked if the place was safe and not watched by their enemies. The Au Ra had so far proven one of their most loyal and competent allies and so Rael didn’t doubt her words.

Neither did they doubt the information Yugiri and her shinobi had gathered this time. Given the possibility that the sultana had only been poisened and was just asleep, instead of dead, the most likely person to know how to wake her up would be the one who had administered the poison. Suspiciously one of the sultana’s personal chambermaids had vanished from the palace without a trace only a few days after the incident.

Now Yugiri had apparently found out that the woman was hiding at no other place than the Silver Bazaar. The mention of this name alone made A’viloh’s ears attentively shoot up. Rael could only imagine what the prospect of returning to the place, that now was the closest thing to a home for him, must feel like.

Raubahn suggested that, to stay unseen for as long as possible and also to fasten their journey, it would be best to take a boat from Vesper Bay, around Crescent Cove and past the Beaconhill Lighthouse to travel to the Bazaar. For understandable reasons A’viloh visibly didn’t like this idea. But of course none of the persons present - except Rael - knew that A’viloh had not only lived at the Silver Bazaar for about a year but also had been washed ashore there after a shipwreck and likely the most horrible time of his life.

“Wouldn’t it be smarter to split up?”, Rael suggested. “If A’viloh and I travel over land, just the two of us, we could certainly stay undected. This way we could approach the settlement from both ways at the same time and make sure our target doesn’t get away.”

Nothing would happen to the Miqo’te of course on a simple boat trip from here to the Bazaar and he probably could not hide from this phobia forever but in this case Rael didn’t see any reason to make him unnecessarily uncomfortable. Besides, the reason they had brought up was in fact a good one and so it was decided that just as Rael had suggested the two of them would travel over land while the rest of them would take a boat. They would keep in contact via linkpearl and make sure both groups were safe and would arrive at the same time.

As expected their journey went without issues. The area was sparsely populated apart from Vesper Bay and Horizon but even there weren’t too many guards present and they passed without being recognised.

“We should speak to Kikipu first.”, Rael suggested as the two of them walked towards the settlement. “I am sure she knows best about everything happening at the Bazaar.”

Vehemently A’viloh nodded and if his tail hadn’t been hidden by his coat, Rael was sure it would have excitedly wagged back and forth. As they walked into the settlement Pipin approached them from the harbor side and decided to keep an eye on the gate, while A’viloh had already spotted the small Lalafell woman with the lavender colored hair.

“Hello…”, he said shyly as they stepped toward her, almost as if he felt bad for having vanished for so long without a word.

Surprised she turned around and looked up to the familiar voice. Upon seeing the Miqo’te in his disguise, which obviously did nothing to hide his identity from her, the surprise on her face turned into a mix of disbelief and relieved happiness.

“A’vi? Is it really you?”, she asked quietly.

The Miqo’te knelt down, pulled back his hood and apologetically smiled at her. “Hello, Kikipu.”

Instantly the Lalafell raised her hands to her mouth and her eyes got glassy. “A’vi! My boy! I missed you so much! I was so horribly worried something could have happened to you.”

A’viloh leant forward, hugging her tightly and she returned the hug in equal manner. “I missed you too! And I am so sorry I left without saying goodbye or at least sending a letter. Believe me, I thought about it. But I feared it would only put you in danger…”

“In danger?”, Kikipu asked a little shocked. “So something happened after all? There were rumours about turmoil in the city that day you visited the festivities at the palace.”

“I can’t explain everything now, but I promise that I will soon. Just know that whatever you heard about us is nothing but lies.”, A’viloh pleaded, holding her tiny hands tightly in his own.

“I thought so...”, she said and nodded firmly. “A few days after the festivities strange, unfriendly men in blue uniforms appeared here and started asking questions about you.”

“The Crystal Braves?”, A’viloh asked alarmed. “Did they harm you?”

“Harm me? You think I let anybody bully me?”, the Lalafell laughed. “I said you weren’t here and told them to get lost!”

A’viloh chuckled. “Yes, I can imagine that.”

“But why are you here now?”, Kikipu wondered.

“We are looking for a midlander woman, who was one of the sultana’s chambermaids. It is possible she is to blame for what happened at the palace that day.”, A’viloh explained and added, “But I promise, we only want to talk to her.”

“Meriel?”, the Lalafell asked surprised and A’viloh nodded. “Yes, that was her name!”

„I admit she seemed troubled when she returned from the city but I never would have suspected her to be involved in something bad…“, she seemed seriously unsettled by this news. „To think that maybe you got in trouble because of her… Oh, what a fool I was!“

„No, don’t blame yourself.“, the Miqo’te comforted her. „You did nothing wrong. I know you would never turn away someone needing help.“

So far Rael had only watched and it had been truly heartwarming to see the two of them reunited, but during the whole time Rael had also scanned the rest of the town, watching the others questioning some of the remaining villagers and keeping an eye out for their target. Rael preferred to find the woman in question before she noticed the unusual visitors and decided to flee.

„Can we speak to Meriel though?“, Rael asked impatiently and Kikipu hesitantly nodded and pointed towards one of the buildings. „She lives there.“

Once again A‘viloh hugged her.

„I promise we will speak later. But this matter cannot wait sadly…”

Kikipu smiled and patted his head.

“Just don’t vanish again without a word.”

[avirael]

Vierapril 2024

Day 11 - Longing / Midnight

When Rael left Golmore due to a prophecy they thought it a great opportunity to see the world but many years later and without a clue if they are any closer to fulfilling their destiny or ever return home they sometimes get very homesick.