#Rae rambles

[littleraeofsunshineda]

For the fanfic ask game: 1, 3, and 4! For reassemble road compass 👀

yayyy thank you @asymmetricjest!

Oooh okay so this fic was inspired by Only True in Fairy Tales by Dragonflies_and_Katydids. That is a modern AU which includes a scene of ED on Cullen's part and idk... it just chimed so well with all the trauma that Cullen has in the game setting that it grabbed hold of me like a horny bull terrier and wouldn't let go. I knew I wanted to play with the toxic masculinity of a culture like the Templars, which feeds for Cullen so clearly into a service!top preoccupation and into issues of trauma and self-worth. I was also interested in the dysphoria that the issue might produce. Once I started, though, theology shouldered its way through the trauma and really insisted on having its moment. It made sense because his faith is totally fundamental to Cullen's nature, and I don't believe that he's lost it - but I think the crisis of that faith is a huge part of him in Inquisition, and it really decisively insisted that it was the only path through and out of his issues. I liked that it wasn't solved with the physical issue, either: it becomes really firmly clear that it's a mental and self-perception trauma at its root, and in that sense I'm proud that I managed to talk about the things I wanted to talk about and make something meaningful out of what was also a quite self-indulgent inspiration.

3. I had to reread it for this haha so thank you :)

I think it has to be this, which I worried was excessively fruity as I wrote it, but I still secretly love (it makes me think of Pyramas snd Thisbe like the Shakespeare nerd I am aha - appropriate for the farce of the scene and the "comic" misunderstandings they keep having):

Cullen was sick with it, with being baffled and devastated in turns, with the way they seem to be talking through the cracks of a wall, peering through to see slices and fragments of each other, glancing scraps gilded by the moonlight, meteor glimpses flaring through chinks in brickwork. It felt as though they’d been going in circles for hours, tearing brick after brick down and watching the wall rise as fast as they dug, fingers dripping red onto the stones.

I also really enjoy all the language about Cullen's penis from his perspective: it sounds strange, but I'm really pleased with how I managed at conveying the physicality of it and what, well, flaccid penii are like :D and turning that slight silliness of them into part of the dysphoric disgust. It felt very real and genuine to me and I am grateful with how it came out.

4. Hmmm I think this one might be split between two wolves in me: the first is the romantic, and it's a moment we write a lot of in this fandom, when Dorian's slip of the tongue leads to confessions"

“I know what ‘amatus’ means, Dorian,” he answered, softly, and let a smile tug his lips up, crooked, to one side.Dorian let his lids fall closed, a whistling breath rushing out through his nose.“Ah… Krem, the traitorous bastard that he is?”“No,” Cullen said, and nuzzled gently at the place where Dorian’s jaw met his ear, straightened a little to kiss his trembling eyes. “I worked it out it from context.”

The second is the comic/sarky. Generally speaking I have so much fun writing Dorian. I think he is a wonderful, sarky but vulnerable human being, and that cadence is really interesting to write. So there is this:

"[Cullen] said, “Come,” almost without thinking, and it was only when a clipped, light voice said “What a brilliant idea; let’s discuss that,” that he looked up, and felt all his blood run cold to see Dorian framed by the light in the doorway."

That one always makes me giggle. It's very Dorian: a quip, a silliness, but at the same time covering his vulnerability where he's asking for a conversation, putting himself on the line.

[sunshineler]

I’m up, I’ve been to the gym, I’ve showered, I’m about to eat breakfast, and I have a date later today

[rawiewrites]

january wrap up

I'm slowly learning that any progress is good, and to not get frustrated by not hitting my own self appointed milestones. I wrote two chapters that I am pretty happy with during january and I made this practical little table to help me keep count of my own progress and to help me keep my goal in sight. I'm aiming for 30k words so this book can count as a novella, but as long as I'm happy with the story I don't mind if I end up with less or more words, and of course the 13 chapters are just a guide, but for all we know it could be less in the end!

I'm gonna try to get back to working on this project during february, since the last couple of weeks were a little busy at both work and my crochet commissions and left me with no time to work on my book, but fingers crossed!

[doctor-vertigo]

I’m tryna get an ao3 account but it’s lowkey gonna take fifty years. I’ve been cooking up selfship fics and I’m hoping maybe at least one person on this big earth will read them, idk

[illyrianbitch]

woke up from a nap dream where i lived thru an entire eris fanfic….and now i want to write it but i can only remember the beginning. should i yolo or

[mr---moth]

So so far in the last 2 weeks I've showed my husband Undertale, Deltarune and all of Steven Universe and now I'm out of ideas lol

[change-name-later]

Sleepy theory time since the official steam acc still hasn’t changed from “Not Smg3” and the idea came to mind.

What if the Smg4 that we’re seeing right now isn’t the “real” Smg4.

I wanna remind everyone that Smg4 himself has only appeared in one episode so far this year (Mario Drinks Water). Which, to be fair, we’re only two episodes in this year. So he hasn’t been exactly “missing” for a long time.

He doesn’t have much of an appearance. And even then, half of his voice lines were taken from meme clips. Smg4 only actually talks when telling Mario to drink water. That’s it.

His only other appearance in the episode was to join in the others giving Smg3 disappointed glares. But Smg4 doesn’t speak, or even move for that matter. (Then again, the others don’t either. They all sort of glide off screen. Not exactly the weirdest behavior. But still worth pointing out his stone silence imo.)

It’s not like Smg4 has never had his identity stolen before (A Totally Normal SMG4 Episode). So I’m just saying, it’s entirely possible this “Smg4” is someone else. Whether this is another case of stolen identity. Or a double acting as Smg4 for the time being, I’m not sure.

[wndaswife]

wait i just realized… that if darcy and everyone outside westview were seeing the skips in the broadcast LIVE, like if dottie breaking the glass happened in real time but wasn’t broadcasted live on television, then wanda was literally controlling time, like rewriting things out of existence within a space that she designated

you can literally see the jump from one scene to another during the episode where you could see jimmy calling to her from the outside pov, as if it were edited out of the show after the events occurred. but they happened in real time and it was broadcasted in real time

the things which occurred in time in westview did not occur outside of it, although they were literally happening at the same time

the people of westview experienced a slightly longer duration spent inside than was observed and timed from the outside, for how wanda literally rewrote the events of time in how it aligned with the outside world’s timeline. and these things remained as experiences and repressed memories for the townspeople, but in the real world, the timeline in which it occurred for them was literally taken out of existence

MEANING wanda completely created an entire pocket of time, independent of the chronology of the real world. but more than that, she created it in a way where whatever happened inside westview did not happen outside of it, nowhere on its timeline. dottie breaking the glass literally does not exist anywhere outside of westview, as an experience and as a temporal moment on a timeline. if she wanted to, she could live years and years and even an eternity inside of a bubble within a millisecond of the real world’s timeline

[new-wave-worm]

The Prince Charles Cinema is currently under threat of being shut down by new landlords. This cinema is so incredibly important to the London area. They specialize in older/indie films and I've gotten to see so many amazing films through them. Please sign and share this petition to help! It's already gotten a ton of signatures, keep it up!

[watch-with-rae]

I finished tgcf book 3. I didn’t not like the flashback parts but my god was my enjoyment once we went back to the present infinitely greater. I had a stupid smile on my face or found myself genuinely laughing through the rest of the book.

[villagewarlock]

So I think I'm maybe about to dive headfirst into the idea of form follows function in clothing design...

I am realizing that I actually don't have any pants that I really like wearing and that I never really learned how to tell how pants are supposed to fit me (rip my high school years being during the skinny jean era).

Also have been looking at suit jackets from the 70s and the number of pockets in these jackets! maybe putting my wallet and phone in my pants pockets is a mistake actually... perhaps I need to shift gears and just make structured layering pieces with interior pockets so that when you put things in them they don't ruin any lines.

My dad handed me down this leather jacket he got in the 90s and this thing is too big for me but I could care less because a) it is a nice heavy leather and has a quilted lining so in combo with a layer or two of sweaters it has been successfully surviving canadian winters with me and b) it has the most massive left interior breast pocket. I can fit small books in there, I can fit a water bottle in there easily. my keys live there half the time. and because it's big on me and I'm wearing a bulky scarf with it most of the time, you cannot tell at all that there are things in that pocket from the outside.

And I really did just realize that I could just design things like this. I could just do functional, considered design so this is now the goal.. Also really need to figure out what kind of pants/trousers I want to be wearing and make some of those

[raezlove]

If I’m not tired then I’m asleep.

[torturedalec]

“clean girl” this “clean girl” that. No. i will be messy and insufferable. i am chaos i am free

[illyrianbitch]

just got a fresh manicure. i am unstoppable. my hands are now certified to write life-changing prose

[rae-arachne]

Heart Horny is what i'm going to start calling that really good shit

anything can make your dick hard, but it takes something really special to light up every single cell in your body, mind, and soul

it sounds cliche, but when you find that piece of art, experience, kink, person, etc that really really turns you on, you primarily feel it in your heart

[wndaswife]

hii!

just wanted to say that your blog is really cool :) and their stories too!

-☆

hayyyy thank you!!!!!! :DDDD i like dis star