#Procrastinating writing old WIPs

[coldercreation]

(--)

“That will be rough on your knees, pet,” Kit said quietly, reaching out a hand to bury in Nathan’s unruly hair. The office had the same hardwood floors as the rest of the flat, and the small rug in the room didn’t reach under the chair and the desk. “The pillows are on the sofa…”

Nathan leaned his head against Kit’s palm, nose finding the secondary scent gland on his wrist. The silently puffing breaths felt ticklish on Kit’s skin, but the sensation disappeared when Nathan firmly rubbed his cheek over the scent-source in clear mine - mine - want.   

“‘s okay, I like it… like this, I mean,” Nathan said then, looking away from Kit’s eyes just to mouth over his wrist a little, nibbling before a soft bite.

Kit’s chest rumbled. 

Nathan’s omega responded with an airy, barely there whimper.

“Y’like it when it hurts a little?” Kit asked, voice roughened by the growl. His fingers twisted into Nathan’s hair as if they had a mind of their own, but he didn’t take it further from there, just left it as a hint of a suggestion.

(--)

KIT-NAT | Rating: E | Current word count: 3729

[journeyman-tier-fibercraft]

Been busy enough to justify a full round up for this WIP Wednesday. The TL;DR being that I'm back to being fully lace brained.

Blanket 10 is NEARLY finished. I've started attaching the last row and just need to finish out this row and then do a border (and give him a good wash, I've owned some of this yarn for years and it smells a little dusty). The nights are starting to get really cold here so I'll be happy to have it done, I just gotta force myself to work on it.

Doily 14 (Yarn | Pattern) needs to go on a longer needle but other than that is very fun and cute. I've decided to put it down for a bit to work on the next two projects but I expect when they get boring I'll go back to this. This pattern is surprisingly simple for a Neibling as long as you're prepared for the long pattern rows. Absolutely going to have to break out the washi tape to mark off my rows for the second chart, but the first one has been very easy lace knitting.

Unnamed project aka me fucking around to see if I can freehand this sweater design. I had started with a two row lace ("Honeycomb lace" from A Second Treasury of Knitting Patterns by Barbara G Walker) but honestly didn't find it fun to knit. So I transitioned to a favourite of mine (ssk, k2tog, yo twice). It's going a lot faster now tho it looks a little weird. I'm going to knit to the underarm and if it fits, it stays. If it's too small I'll rip all the way back and redo the shaping in this lace pattern instead with longer shoulder saddles. It's unfortunate that I didn't like knitting the honeycomb lace, I really like how it looks, I'll have to try swatching it in different yarns to see if the problem is just that this yarn has zero stretch (100% cotton).

I have decided I will put short sleeves on this tho. I had planned to just add ribbing for the arms but I saw a drop shoulder vest in a similar style and did Not like it, so this just saves me from having to rip back. I also think I'm going to have to leave this cropped, I'm not a big crop top person but with this yarn being cotton, having a full length body along with the sleeves is going to have the neckline very stretched. There may be no helping it regardless but there's no harm in trying. I imagine if this is does become something I wear it'll either be in the dead of summer or layered over a button up/some sort of top anyway, so a crop wouldn't be too uncomfortable.

Last but certainly not least is Shawl 14 (Pattern | Yarn). My precious Evenstar is coming along very well, I'm actually on the second to last pattern row before the set up for the border. I know the border is going to be a slog but I'm excited for it regardless, he's huge even all compressed on the needles. My self imposed deadline for him is April, but the border is only 56 repeats. If I can do one every other day I should be right on time, which sounds do-able even tho I know I'll get bored by the halfway point.

I need to keep an eye out for patterns for this yarn, I have a whole second cone plus what'll be left after I finish this shawl. These cones staring at me will probably be the push I need to settle on an Orenburg shawl pattern. (Or possibly a large Neibling, or one of MMario's patterns.)

[arainaizevran]

wip wednesday ft. durgewyll

“I can teach you how to play that lute, if you want,” Wyll offers.

“What?”

“It’s Alfira’s, isn’t it?”

Ajax takes the lute off his back and lays it on his lap. It’s disturbingly pristine, clean of the blood he’d spilled. “Do you think it’s… alright?”

“You kept the lute for a reason. I assume it’s to honour her. What better way than to learn how to play it?”

Ajax studies the lute for longer. “I had no idea you played.”

“I was trained as a child. I didn’t appreciate it back then, much preferred dancing lessons, but… good music has a way of soothing a troubled soul.”

He hands the lute to Wyll. “Will you play something for me?”

Wyll can’t help but smile. “But of course.” He takes it. There’s a familiarity to the way he carries it with ease. Wyll tunes it by ear, then plays a sombre melody.

He’s right; it’s soothing. Ajax watches him play, and Wyll gives a shy smile. His heart flutters at the sight. The glow of the campfire illuminates his face, shining a light on his features. Wyll is… handsome. Attractive, even. Ajax quickly pushes the thought down. Wyll would never see him that way. Not after what he’s done, or what he may do in the future. His hand twitches with the familiar urge to maim. He balls his fist, white-knuckled, and focuses on Wyll’s fingers strumming the lute, the melancholic notes of the song, Wyll’s brows furrowing as his other hand glides along the neck of the lute.

Ajax scoots closer to listen in, scanning Wyll’s features as he plays the lute. The wrinkles around his eyes, the scarred lines across his cheeks, his neatly braided hair, his stone eye faintly glimmering in the dark.

He’s beautiful.

The music stops and Wyll looks at him.

Shit, did I say that out loud?

A voice speaks in his head: Not quite. Wyll smiles at him, making Ajax’s ears flush with heat as he looks away.

Sorry. That was supposed to be private, Ajax says through their cerebral connection.

I’m flattered, he responds.

With that remark, Ajax promptly severs the mental link, clearing his throat in an attempt to regain his composure. “You play well,” he says, hoping to move past the blunder he’d just committed.

“Lute lessons are still on the table,” Wyll says, handing the lute back to him.

“I… I’d like that.”

[cacklefrendly]

im learning firsthand that writing has two modes: *takes three hours to write 10 words then collapses like you've run a marathon* and *accidentally writes 500+ words in like 30 minutes*

[world-of-fire-and-flight]

Fantasy Indies June: Day 4

We all know I'm a fan of slow-burn romances and found family stories, but I'm also a big fan of "who did this to you?" moments and was stoked to finally have a chance to put my characters into that situation. There is, of course, magic and some pretty cool worldbuilding in TSAF too, but the romance tropes are strong in this one😉

[nhasablogg]

The end (again)

First of all I want to thank you all for following and engaging with me ever since I returned to this space. It's been, mostly, great. I've written some things I'm really proud of, and for that reason I'm reluctant to delete this blog like I did the last.

I think it's been obvious I've not been enjoying myself in a long time, except for the occasional few days when it's been fun to write and interact with people. Throughout this whole year I've been trying to convince myself that I can use this blog only when I want to and feel inspired to, and while it sometimes works it very often just leaves me frustrated as I try to make this space fun for myself again. I'm gonna try not to be too longwinded about this as I have the habit of being, so long story short, I'm going to leave this blog.

I won't be deleting anything, but I'll also not be using this blog anymore. I was debating just disappearing without saying anything, but I think that's rude when some of you have been so very kind. The one and only exception will be if I feel really inspired and write something I love and would like to share specifically on here (or maybe I'll just post them on AO3 if I feel like it). Since I won't feel pressured to use this blog I'm sure that experience will be authentic and beautiful and rare. I want to focus on writing outside of this space, as I keep putting my energy here and not where I'd like it to be. There are lots of things going on in my life right now and I'd like to try to regain some control by using my free time intentionally in order to become the version of myself I'm striving toward. This blog is, unfortunately, not part of that version.

I still have a few prompts I want to fill, and a few WIPs I want to finish/post anyway, so I'm not disappearing just yet. When I say disappear, I'm not sure if I mean that I won't ever be logged in. I'm not entirely sure yet how I'm going to go about it, if I'm going to answer messages or turn asks off or what. I think, in the long run, asks will be turned off just so that I won't feel the urge to log in for the off chance someone has given me some attention. That's why I deleted the old blog, to keep myself from having one foot in there still.

I want to thank you for the lovely lovely time being back here. It's not been perfect, but that's not what I'm deciding to take with me this time. I want to remember writing Criminal Minds fics and Stranger Things fics and Red White and Royal Blue fics and Heartstopper fics, and how lovely you were about those fics. Revisiting fandoms and finding new ones and completing tickletober and having plans and ambitions for projects (even though I didn't always follow through, it's always nice having ambitions). I don't regret deleting the old blog and I don't regret creating this one. I think I probably needed to return, on my own terms, just like I'm now leaving on my own terms. I don't think I did that last time.

I keep rewriting this and looking at it and wondering if I will regret posting it. If posting it will somehow flip the switch and I will find so much joy here again and look like a fool. And if that happens, so be it. But I need to post this. I can't keep procrastinating. I have, in a way, been working up the nerve to say goodbye for the past year.

If you've ever commissioned a fic, I urge you to save it somewhere because I can't promise I won't randomly delete one day in the future either, if I realize it will be for the better (I guess the same goes for if you enjoy a fic and would like to be able to revisit it - but please don't share it anywhere else).

N over and out (well, once I finish those fics I still want to finish)

[pimosworld]

Never have I ever

Kinktober Prompt-Voyeurism,Squirting,Polyamory

Pairing -Will Miller x f!reader x Tf boys x f!reader

Summary-You and the boys play a game and things take an interesting turn.

CW-18+,MDNI,NSFW, Voyuerism, Smut, Fluff, Rough sex, Dom Will, mentions of anal, mentions of MM dynamics, restraints, mentions of safe word but no use, established poly relationship, Unprotected PIV, cream pie, squirting, aftercare. Appropriate discussion of past relationships.

WC-4K

A/N- Set in the story of us verse but can be read as a stand alone. Reader is not race coded, no use of Y/N. This is my current WIP procrastination, when lightning strikes you must write. My first kinktober prompt. I just reached 400 followers and this is 4000 words so I’m gonna take this as my follower celebration as well.

[Series Masterlist][Main Masterlist]

“Ben, are we seriously playing this?” The five of you are situated comfortably in your usual spots in the living room and somehow the younger Miller has convinced you all to ‘make things more interesting’ in his words. 

  “I’m too old for this.” Frankie mumbles into his beer as he downs the rest. 

  “We know…that doesn’t mean you’re getting out of it.” You chuckle briefly as Santi’s hand skirts higher up your thigh under the blanket. He’s been slowly torturing you as you relaxed on the couch, all of you decompressing and going over your week. It was a new ritual to discuss the ins and outs of your time apart but it seemed Ben was growing tired of the normal mostly mundane conversation.

  “Hands up let’s go.” The impatient Miller barks from his spot on the floor, too big to fit anywhere else and you're always unsure of why Will won’t just get a bigger couch. You suggested a few months ago that it would be nice for all of you to be able to relax together. He agreed but evidently it takes time to find the perfect one. 

  Everyone reluctantly puts their hands up, Santiago opting for one hand because he can’t pry his other from the warmth of you under the blanket. The other part of you knows he’ll probably lose this game and he doesn’t feel like putting too much effort into revealing how much of a slut he was before he pulled his head out of his ass and finally told you how he felt. 

  “Both hands, Pope.” Frankie chides from beside you and Santi squeezes your thigh before drawing his hand out and flipping him off. 

  This game was an odd choice, almost completely out of left field. The five of you knew almost everything there was to know about each other. Although you’re sure the boys know a lot more about their respective sexual escapades than they know about yours. Nothing among these men is ever done by accident, you’re just waiting to see the angle that’s being played so you don’t end up trapped. The confused and amused looks on the others' faces has you a little at ease since it seems this is a solo mission for Ben and those didn’t always go as planned. 

  “I’ll start since it was my idea.” Will sends you a look from across the room as to say of course and you’re acutely aware that he hasn’t let out one protest or sign of stopping this game. You’re almost positive it’ll come down to you both in the end and he knows it judging by the smug look on his face. 

  “Never have I ever faked an orgasm.” You roll your eyes as you put one finger down. Maybe you were going to lose after all. The chuckles from the others don’t help your embarrassment, even though you should hardly blame yourself. It doesn’t need to be clarified that since you’d been with all of them there was no need to fake it anymore, but it was definitely known by all that you had to in the past an ungodly amount of times. 

  You brave a look up from the carpet that you’d all but memorized as you see Ben's wide tooth grinning at Frankie beside you. You look over just in time to see Frankie put his finger down as the redness creeps up his neck. He’s staring daggers at the younger Miller and Santi’s chuckles send vibrations through your body as you lean into him. 

  “How did she not know?” You ask him in the sweetest tone, no judgment behind it, just genuine curiosity. 

  He scrubbed his hand over his jaw, his calloused fingers digging into the patchy part of his beard. No doubt thinking how long this night will be if we have to explain each finger down,but of course that’s always Ben’s plan. He wants to draw this out for as long as he can. 

  “I pulled out and spit on her back.” He says it so sheepishly you almost feel bad for him. An image flashes in your mind and you make the mistake of looking over at Will who is doing his best to not completely lose it. You cup your mouth trying to suppress the giggle but it’s far too late. 

  “Laugh it up honey.” The funniest part is how could anyone not be thoroughly enjoying themselves when Francisco Morales is behind the wheel, but you figure it’s their loss. 

  You wrack your brain for something you’ve never done that they may have.Blowjob,one night stand,sent a nude photo,had sex in public…those are all out. 

  Will interrupts your thoughts as he speaks from the loveseat. “Never have I ever had a threesome.” He just saved you in more ways than one as you see Benny and Frankie glance at each other as they put a finger down. Santi tsks beside you and you don’t even have to look over to see he did as well. 

  You miss the look Santi shoots Frankie above your head as he makes a mental note. Ben may have been a thorn in his side at times but right now he could kiss the ground he walked on. Unbeknownst to you this has turned into a silent competition of memorizing everything you’ve never done,each time you don’t put a finger down he clocks one of them. He doesn’t even care that he’s about to lose as the room thrums with sexual tension. 

  As you predicted you and Will have the most fingers left. You have three,Will has two and Benny has one that he’s been holding onto for dear life. Santi and Frankie had long been out, Santi rejoins the group after refreshing your drinks. He knew he hasn't missed anything since it was getting harder to think of things as the game went on. 

  You need to get Ben out and you were sure this next question would. If it also took one down for Will then you would just be getting lucky you guessed. 

  “Never have I ever done anal.” Santi stifles a moan next you as Frankie not so subtly adjusts the growing bulge in his jeans. You were so focused on winning that you have no idea how thin of a thread they were holding onto. Frankie’s been fighting the mental image of checking each thing off your list one by one. Santiago isn’t faring much better not having realized how much innocence was still lying dormant in you. 

  Ben concedes as he grabs the pillow he was using on the floor, your brace for the moment that he decides to toss it at you only for him to place it gingerly in his lap. 

  “Welcome to the club.” Frankie mutters under his breath as you stare down Will who now has one finger up…interesting. 

  “Never have I ever been tied up.” Fuck

  You put a finger down and wait for the responses that eventually never come. Will was playing dirty, he knows for a fact you’ve been tied up. It had only been a week since he asked you if you wanted to try it. 

  This was it,you had to go for the kill…but how bad did you want to win? You know there’s only one way but it will certainly come at a cost. In the end the cost may be worth it. 

  You raise up on the couch sitting back on your heels,proudly displaying the two fingers you have left. You can’t chance a look at anyone besides Will or you might chicken out. Frankie’s fingers grip nervously at the blanket that’s fallen next to you. He wants to reach out and touch you, the only sound over your beating heart is the rustling of the couch cushions as Santi leans forward just into your peripheral vision. Breath in…Breathe out 3,2,1. 

  “Never have I ever made someone squirt.” You say it so fast they almost don’t catch it…almost.

  “Ha…he’s never made anyone…” Ben is silenced mid sentence as Will closes his fist and leans back into the seat. He doesn’t really care that he’s lost, in reality he’s actually won this game. Judging by the shocked looks on their faces or Ben’s mouth hanging agape. You didn’t fully think this through, your brain was clouded with the thrill of winning. 

  He almost feels bad for you as he says the momentary look of triumph quickly turns into one of defeat. It’s written all over your face as the realization sets in that you’ve completely fucked yourself, you would be a horrible poker player because you just revealed all your cards. If this were a lion's den you were a fresh piece of meat. 

  A drop of sweat trickles down your back as you lower your hand slowly to place it on your thigh. The room is so quiet you could hear a pin drop. 

  “Prove it.” Santi’s voice is so close to your ear you nearly jump out of your skin. 

  Will tilts his head at you as if to challenge you. This game was far from over and you’d be damned if you were going to lose. You stand from the couch and walk over to him. Four sets of eyes watching your every move as you grab his hand and pull him to stand. You raise your eyebrows as an acceptance to his challenge and he starts to lead you away from them toward the hallway. You sense no movement behind you as you make your way to his bedroom. 

  “You boys coming or not?”  A small stampede sounds behind you and you chuckle picturing them trying not to trample each other as their bodies catch up with their feet, no doubt all thought having left their brains. 

  ****

  Santi’s lost count, has it been five or six times Will has brought you to the edge only to pull away and deny you what you so desperately want and need. He’s no stranger to this game but he doesn’t think he’s ever been this turned on by it. Watching from a whole different viewpoint. Being a spectator is thrilling and watching you writhe and chase his touch after each denial makes his cock achingly hard in his jeans. 

  Frankie’s not doing much better as he tries to follow Will's rules he laid out before starting. If you want me to show you then you don’t touch her unless I tell you to. The captain in him didn’t come out often anymore but when it did he commanded respect. 

  Ben stares on with excitement and curiosity written all over his face. He watches as you grip the sheets, your chest heaving as sweat beads down your forehead. Will told you not to touch yourself and Ben didn’t know you could be so obedient. 

  Wills got you so on edge you can’t be shy anymore about the way you beg for him and plead for him to let you come. A far cry from when you first entered the bedroom. 

  He had slowly undressed you and instructed you to lay flat on the bed. He crawled over your body kissing and biting his way up your thighs and your stomach. His hand caressed your breast as his tongue laved over the other. It was too much and not enough as your eyes met the others standing in the room. They’d all seen you in this position before but something about them watching suddenly has you feeling vulnerable. 

  “Look at me.” He leaned in and kissed you, deep and passionate as his hand gripped your waist and his tongue prodded your mouth. An expert distraction to bring you back to the moment. 

  “It’s just me and you.” It was the last thing he said to you before he methodically took you apart right before their eyes. You knew he was taking his time, putting on a show. He wasn’t simply going to make you squirt and move on like some conquest. He wanted to draw this out, show them what he was capable of. 

  He started with his mouth as his breath ghosted over your slick folds. He looked up at you through hooded lids one more time to give you a chance to back out, when you gave no indication of wanting to stop he dragged his tongue expertly through your slit. Parting it with his thumb as he dove in circling your clit. You were a goner from the beginning as he brought you to the first cliff only to leave you hanging. You cried out his name in desperation as he dipped two fingers in, pumping in and out as he bit down on your thigh. The pleasure and pain mixed in with you on display had your nerves alight. 

  With each denied release you can feel the pressure building in your core, it’s so close you can taste it on the tip of your tongue. You can taste yourself as he leans over you again kissing you through your whimpers as your body shakes beneath him. 

  “Will please…” Your sweet voice begging is like music to their ears. Frankie would give you whatever you want if you asked him but Will doesn’t budge. 

  “Please what sweetheart…I can’t read your mind.” 

  Son of a bitch he’s trying to kill you. 

  For all his resolve Santiago can’t help but be impressed. Even if this sudden burst of confidence is all a show for them he has to admit he would’ve caved by now and just went straight for the finale. 

  You’re not even sure when Ben and Frankie sat on the bed leaning against the headboard beside you, or when Santi sat at the end to have a perfect view of your pussy clenching around nothing as your arousal drips onto the sheets below. 

  “Please Will, I need you inside me…I need to come please.” You’re practically crying as he shushes you, his cock leaking precum on your stomach as it twitches in anticipation. He’s not going to be able to last much longer at this rate either. 

  He leans back on his heels as he grips the base of his cock, slapping your clit and dragging it through your slick as he slowly prods your entrance. The noise you make almost has him buckling as you sigh into it finally having what you want. 

  He starts at a slow pace as he wraps your legs around his waist, he can see the way your face contorts with every slap of his hips against yours. You can feel every vein and ridge as the lude sounds of your sweat and slick echo in the room. 

  You can’t see it from where you are but Frankie’s itching to touch you, desperately wanting to break the rule as he watches you try not to touch yourself. 

  Ben is mesmerized as he watches your breasts bounce with every thrust of Will's hips, he wants to latch onto you and bite down until you're screaming his name, but he knows his brother would do more than scold him if he so much as tried to touch you right now. 

  Santi’s waiting…waiting for any sign or movement as to how he does it. He’s thoroughly enjoying himself but he’s seen nothing new, nothing he hasn’t done to you a dozen times over. Any indication as to what Will has managed to do before the rest of them. It’s driving him a little mad as he watches you beg for it like you’ve never had it before. 

  You can feel the tension building as Will picks up his pace, he shifts your legs to either side of his head as he punches the air out of your lungs with every thrust. He brings his thumb down rubbing fast circles on your clit as you try to grab his wrist. That all too familiar feeling has you keen and arch your back. “Grab her hands.” Frankie moves before you can think, your wrists gripped tightly in one of his palms above your head. 

  “Wait…please.” He chuckles under his breath as his chest heaves with the sharp movements. Not mere seconds ago you were begging to come and now you’re begging him to stop. 

  You crane your head back and lock eyes with Ben, his eyes are etched with worry as he lays there helpless to your pleas. “Will!” 

  “She’s fine…aren’t you sweetheart?” You can’t think, he’s fucked you so dumb you cant remember your own name let alone formulate a sentence. “Yes.” Is all you can manage. 

  “She knows what to say if she wants to stop.” He grits through his teeth as his orgasm steadily approaches, his thighs burn and he’s surely bruised your calves as he grips tightly to them. 

  You’ve never safe worded with him and you don’t plan on it now. It feels so good as the searing hot sensation creeps up your spine threatening to take purchase in your brain. “Please don’t stop.” 

  He gestures to Frankie to grab the pillow, who moves with lightning speed as he situates it under your back. Santi looks at your face then, and he finally sees it. The look of panic and bliss as you succumb to the inevitable. He’s seen this look before but he ran from it afraid that he might hurt you. Will punches something deep inside you as he lifts your hips, the sound you make bordering on pornography while your arousal coats his stomach almost forcing him out of you completely. 

  He thrusts once and twice before nearly collapsing his weight onto you as he comes through your high. He releases your legs as he leans in to give you a kiss. Will was nothing if thorough and he always made sure you were okay. It’s in this moment that you truly feel like it’s just the two of you and not aware of the blissed out expressions of the other men. 

  “You did so good for me.” He pants out against your mouth as he desperately tries to catch his breath. 

  You highly doubt this is what Ben had in mind when he suggested this game but it ended much better than any of you would have anticipated. 

  Moments pass and you’ve just barely recovered. You’re in need of a shower and some water as you try to move slightly, the grip on your wrists tighten as you look back at Frankie. 

  Do it again. 

Comments and reblogs are much appreciated

Tagging a few who might be interested

@csarab615 @syrupsstuff @ghostslillady @uudelally @onefinnedwonder-fm @thedreadandthefugitivemind @romanarose @scarletthefierce

[0oolookitsme]

It's Buzzcut Season, Anyways!

Eeeeekk!!!! Hi Hi everyone!! I hope you are all doing well, here comes the first post of the year! <3

So.. It is my birthday today, and I'm very excited to tell you that I'm introducing to you, another one of my pairings! This a little excerpt from the fic (wip) I'm writing about this chaotic pairing, and I really do hope this gets you as excited about their story, as I am! This was supposed to be up in December but for some reason, I didn't post it?? Anyways, other than that, you shall see more, further on in 2024 :)

Also, shoutout to @cupid-styles and @elioslover for picking my ice hockey!Harry to be the one to get a buzzcut, hahah! My indecisive self (who lowkey wanted you guys to pick him), could've never 💗

All the love always, A.

Verse - NHL Player!Harry x Figure Skater!Y/n (uni era)

Word Count - It's just an excerpt so it's short!

Warnings - None that I can find but if there are any, do tell me and I'll edit them into this!

Y/n is reluctantly trimming Harry's hair when her nose feels funny, and she sneezes. Its good though, that Harry asks for her opinion regarding a change that he would rather appreciate.

Please rb to share! | Masterlist

Y/n sat on her unmade bed, hair unbrushed and messy since she woke up from a 3-hour nap. Her fingers typed away on her laptop, her face showing zero signs of any stress regarding the assignment she's going to have to turn in un-edited.

Probably because of the breakdown she'd had before taking nap. She'd been so stressed that she had drawn blood from her lips and broken two of her nails -- which was rather disappointing to her considering she'd got them done not so long ago in the honour of the upcoming season of winter.

The temperature was still as hot as summer, but half of the world was snowed in, and she wanted the peace of mind that winter brought her; so, she deluded herself into thinking that it was indeed her favourite time of the year.

A silent burp made its way up her throat, as she drank the day-old diet coke she'd been drinking before her meltdown-that-leads-to-an-amazing-nap.

Just as she slurped on the last sip that wasn't anything but melted ice, she heard the door to the flat open and her eyes rose up just in time to catch the sight of a sweaty and out of breath Harry, through the open door of her room.

"Y/n?" He called for her, walking towards her room when she only hummed in response. He passed her an apologetic smile on reaching her doorframe, and she knew he was going to ask something of her that the both of them know she wouldn't be willing to do quite easily.

"I need your help," he grinned at her. "...And Immediately."

She looked at him suspiciously, before deciding to shift her focus back on her assignment, knowing that he would lure her in if she were to continue looking at him.

But Harry was at once kneeling beside the side of bed she was sitting on. With his hands joined, he contorted his face in a way that looked like he was about to cry. "I beg of you, please! If you don't help me right now, my life will be ruined forever!"

Y/n's eyes had fallen into untrusting slits by now as she minimized the document that she had been writing in. "What is it, Harry?" She asked him in a monotonous tone, shutting her laptop as if procrastinating the essay any longer would be a great help.

"Cut my hair."

Instantly her jaw dropped open. Shaking her head, she began reopening her laptop and Harry took a hold of her wrists. "Harry, there's no way!" She yelped as he began making her get off the bed.

"I'm not asking you to give me haircut like Zayn!" He exclaimed, as if that'd ease her. "Just trim it a bit," he shrugged, walking out into the small living-room with Y/n thrashing behind him. She even threw a few hands at him, but he had a feeling that she wasn't as opposed by the idea as she was pretending to.

He pulled out a chair in front of the mirror that, though they had been living in this flat for nearly two months, had yet to be pinned to the wall. "C'mon, you work at a salon -- surely you know how to trim a guy's hair," he teased her, knowing that questioning her abilities would get to her and she'd cut his hair better than any hairdresser ever could.

Looking at her reflection glaring at him through the mirror, he winked at her before bending down to unzip his bag. He pulled out an electric trimmer from inside it and handed it to her, pulling the towel from the coffee table that he had left there earlier in the morning.

Once done draping it over his shoulders, he handed her the trimmer and added a touch of his puppy-dog eyes even though he knew they simply don't work on her.

"Okay. If you end up bald, don't complain then," she grumbled before running her hand through his hair. "Is this sweat or did you wash your hair after practice?" Her face was already contorted in disgust, like she knew he surely couldn't have done the latter.

"Don't you worry, I washed it after practice," he assured her, looking at her as if she should appreciate him.

She turned on the trimmer and held his hair in sections by one of her hands. "Why didn't you go to a salon?" She asked him, trimming the hair on his sides with her mouth parted.

Harry shrugged and immediately retorted when Y/n shrieked, mumbling an apology. "The salon's too far. I don't have the time to get there; got a handful of assignments to turn in before midnight." He told her. "And I mean, saving some money never hurt anyone."

"You do realize that I've put doing my assignment on pause to do this silly shenanigan with you?" Her eyebrows rose up as she fired another question at him. She suppressed a smile when he passed a dimpled-lopsided grin to her. "God, I hate you," she said, and a smile slipped on her lips as she moved to the other side to trim the rest of his hair.

She had no reason to be doing a parttime job at a salon, it wasn't going to help her in the future in any way, but it did help her in the present with its money. The money she got by being apprenticed to a dance company went straight into the flat-bills and some other necessary purchases that she couldn't avoid.

But she wasn't complaining about it. Living among frat people was a nightmare for her. She did have fun with people but being a clean-freak and a morning person didn't match well with the frats. They did love her dearly, but when Harry came in asking if someone would be willing to be his flat mate, everyone had chanted for Y/n. And, when he asked Y/n at the rink, she had quite literally jumped at the opportunity and in the joy of the moment, hugged Harry with a tight grip that still had his heartbeat rise whenever he thought about it.

With her touching his hair, Harry's heart was beating so hard in his chest that he was afraid it was going to break a rib. His eyes never once left her reflection in the mirror, not with the way she was being so careful and serious. Her lips had parted without her knowing, and she wasn't even blinking often enough.

That was when Harry saw a hair-strand fall in her face, and her face scrunch up in a way it does when she's about to sneeze. He saw as she turned to sneeze in her elbow -- a habit that she still hadn't gotten rid of. He shifted his gaze down on his hands in his lap, to prevent her catching him staring at her.

When Y/n caught her breath after the sneeze, her eyes grew wide. Her hand began shaking as she brought the other hand to cover her mouth, looking at his head in horror. She wasn't sure if she should laugh or begin spewing apologies and decided on the latter one.

But as she opened her mouth, Harry looked at her. "Should I just buzz it off?" He questioned her and thought that she had paled at the thought of him going bald. "I mean, the match season is finally over. I don't have anything to do but study, do my parttime and of course practice hockey." He shrugged explaining his point of view, looking at her to help him decided.

"S-sure! I mean, you'd look good with any-any type of haircut." She was shaking and stuttering, but Harry was too lost in his train of thoughts to question her. "A-and its buzzcut season, anyways!"

That seemed to be helpful for Harry. He smiled at her, "Shave it off, then. I'm basically on vacation from tomorrow... and I guess I'd really appreciate a change like this!" He was back to grinning and Y/n's sweat was beginning to cool off.

She imagined sitting with Harry on a sofa on some ordinary-night with her feet in his lap like he were her closest friend and telling him about today -- a movie playing on the lowest volume possible in the background. She stopped herself before she could get lost thinking about his reaction and mess up even his buzzcut.

[vickyzangels]

% mini fic recommendations

a/n ; ok so i KNOWW this isn’t a fic but maybe if i drop this and run it’ll distract you guys while i rip my hair out trying to force myself to finish my wips but for now take (AND APPRECIATE 👁️👁️) gorgeous gorgeous writings i’ve recently accumulated based off fleeting hyperfixations even if that means digging into very old hastags

🥝 - includes smut, 🥥 - multiple parts

# hobie brown (spiderman: across the spiderverse) ;

-> nail polish by: @mcondance 🥝

-> hobie w an awkward girl by: @likedovesinthewindd 🥥

-> selfish by: @szasfuckingwife 🥝

-> unlikely clash by: @hobie-enthusiast 🥥

-> opposites attract by: @mochifilm

# connor (detroit: become human) ;

-> gray area by: @uncouth-the-fifth 🥝🥥

# tate langdon (american horror story) ;

-> oujia board by: @taintandviolent 🥝

# steven grant (moonknight) ;

-> cock therapy by: @whatthefishh 🥝

a/n ; i’ll do another one of these next time i procrastinate

[celestiamour]

‧₊˚✧ ❛[ queer headcanons - chronicles of narnia ]❜

ft. peter pevensie, susan pevensie, edmund pevensie, lucy pevensie, caspian x, eustace scrubb, tumnus, jadis, lilliandil

contains: caspeter (caspian x peter), peter's part is vague but he's definitely not straight despite what he's listed as, gay gay homosexual gay, mentioned transphobia & fights, pronouns match the ones used in the books/movies for writing consistency

➤ author's note: I saw some other people doing it, so i wanted to join in on the fun too!! remember that these are fictional characters with no set sexuality/gender, this is just for fun & for my to further procrastinate my wips

━━━ .°˖✧ peter pevensie - straight ally (unless??) ˚₊ ⊹

╰₊✧ he was more than supportive of all his siblings when they came out, but never thought it was for him. like he has no issue in saying that a guy was attractive but wasn't actually attracted to him for the most part. he never properly questioned his sexuality until arriving in narnia for a second time and refuses to admit (although it was painfully obvious) that his gay awakening was a certain telmarine prince who happened to be his rival and a pretty boy— let's just say he's fighting a lot of internal demons.

━━━ .°˖✧ susan pevensie - lesbian ˚₊ ⊹

╰₊✧ (it was actually more difficult for her to accept that she didn't like men than to accept that she did like women). she was never interested in marriage proposals, invitations to dance, and general flirtatious advancements from men, finding her heart failing to flutter for any of them and only feeling general annoyance by it more than anything. she always told herself that she just hadn't met the right one, but quickly realized that she held no hope nor care if it ever happened. it wasn't until she felt her heart pounding for the first girl who displayed romantic interest for her did she begin to see love from a new perspective.

━━━ .°˖✧ edmund pevensie - transmasc demiromantic pansexual ˚₊ ⊹

╰₊✧ grew up being a tomboy who fussed over his hair growing past his ears, refused to wear dressed to mass or skirts to class, wore all of peter's old clothes instead of susan's, and then realized that he wasn't a girl. being crowned as "king edmund" was the first time he was his true self publicly, and he remained like that even back in england where he wasn't accepted by everyone. although his older brother sometimes gets into fights for his sake, he considers it as filtering out who he should spend his time with and who he should ignore. as a result, he doesn't date around much, but if someone manages to stick with him through all of his insecurities and trauma, he'll find himself slowly falling in love.

━━━ .°˖✧ lucy pevensie - asexual polyamorous lesbian ˚₊ ⊹

╰₊✧ she's always been a girl's girl who was for the girls! the valiant queen has plenty of love to go around, often seen spending quality with her girlfriend(s, who are probably also dating each other): having picnics, horseback riding, hosting tea parties, dancing, and so much more when she isn't performing her royal duties. she doesn't mind being intimate if her partner desires it, but she much prefers bonding in the ways listed above instead.

━━━ .°˖✧ caspian x - bisexual ˚₊ ⊹

╰₊✧ a real lover boy, flirting with both men and women, always making them swoon and blush over his handsome smile to fill an emptiness in his heart. it seemed like no one was able to ignore his irresistible charm until a certain blonde royal showed up with his sword swinging and an arrogant front to hide his true fears. caspian can’t remember the last time he felt so infuriated with someone he was determined to make his, but that would only make the victory of an eventual confession so much sweeter.

━━━ .°˖✧ eustace scrubb - gay demiromantic asexual ˚₊ ⊹

╰₊✧ grew up thinking girls were icky or had cooties before realizing that he simply wasn't attracted to them and they weren't all that bad. he's not completely uninterested in romance, just struggles to find and form a bond with a guy who doesn't think he is weird or mean, and then he struggles to determine if he likes him as a friend or potential love interest. it makes him seem picky in the eyes of others, but maybe he has a unique "friendship" with a boy from his childhood whom he writes to daily and can't envision himself with anyone else. (oh, and he's repulsed by the idea of sex, dare he say disgusted by it)

━━━ .°˖✧ tumnus - non-binary pansexual ˚₊ ⊹

╰₊✧ he doesn't care about gender within himself or his partners as the inner qualities they both possess are much more important. he could be referred to as "he" "she" "they" or something else entirely, he doesn't mind and prefers others to use whichever one they feel like. after becoming both an advisor and uncle figure to the pevensies, he helped immensely in their journey of accepting themselves since they came from a time/place where they could be ostracised for it, and they carried his wisdom long after leaving narnia.

━━━ .°˖✧ jadis - aromantic lesbian ˚₊ ⊹

╰₊✧ she doesn’t care for love nor does she have time for it. romance has never been something she ever considered adding to her long list of priorities, and it honestly made her scoff whenever she heard of it. however, she doesn’t mind having fun with a beautiful dryad who managed to look her in the eyes with an emotion other than fear and then sending them on their way before she gets tempted to eternally preserve their beauty in her growing garden of statues.

━━━ .°˖✧ lilliandil - transfem pansexual ˚₊ ⊹

╰₊✧ I don't have an explanation for this one, she has like five minutes of screen time— it feels right. she's a star who shines for all and is admired by all.

[queerweewoo]

okay this is very long and mostly just for me to get some stuff of my chest and out of my head therefore anybody tagged pls don't feel as though you have to read it all (like obvs you know you don't have to but you also hopefully know what i mean lol):

so i've had some quite heavy stuff going on in meatspace recently, and then i went to see i saw the tv glow two nights ago which was beyond brilliant but fucked me up entirely on a personal level. then, just to be a bit (read: incredibly) stupid, i for some reason (read: bc i'm a masochist) decided to delve into reading waaaay too many of my first 'eddie losing his shit over christopher leaving/summer of sexuality queer crisis' fics, which i've not dared let myself do before now bc it's all very close to the bone for me i.e. my own queer (trans) crises—yes, plural, they keep coming—and stuff that's not a million miles away from the shit going on with my eldest son (bar kim lol). why tf my brain chose the worse time possible is just another one of life's mysteries (read: i'm just insane [see above]).

(btw my struggling hugely with issues of repression plus my son hating/not hating me aside, THIS FIC is the insanely brilliant piece of art that kicked off the binge. it's from the astonishingly talented @wildehacked and is one of two parts which are possibly the best buddie fics—or even just some of the best fics, period—that i've ever read. seriously, check the tags and if you're a buddie lover and it/they seem like your sort of thing you should 100% go save/read it/them!)

anyways, after all that i'm now just kind of spiralling a bit tbh aha. i'm not fine, not rn, but i will be fine at some point soon sort of thing. like, i'm okay and nobody needs to worry etc i'm just trying to do one if the countless things that i'm absolutely bloody terrible at which is reaching out. but not because i need anything from anybody it's more just for me to be able to say “i'm going through some stuff right now and i might or might not disappear for a while” because i don't usually manage anything at all like that when i'm in the trenches and instead just retreat into my shell and go radio silent—and the thing is, i know some very lovely people who have shown concern when i've done that in the past and i'm therefore trying to be better. friends old and new alike such as @shealynn88 @sharkfish @greyhavenisback @raisesomehale @doilooklikepeople @woodchoc-magnum @buddiebeginz i'll absolutely be getting back/chatting to you when i'm able to interact with a bit more—well, when i'm a bit more, i 'spose xp

also tagging lovelies @novemberhush for the usually well-loved procrastination tag game stuff and @inell and @kitteneddiediaz (and possibly @veronae-buddie and @daffi-990?) for the WIP games i've been kindly tagged in but not responded to. thank you and sorry! like, i know it's absolutely fine and nobody really cares about stuff like that, but i'm just very much feeling like i need to say these things right now. and more apologies if there have been tags i've missed from other lovely folks; not being round these parts for 48+hrs = horrendous notifs situation (you know how it is).

on the writing front, i don't know if it's both completely dumb and ridiculous to start this by saying, “hmm, i'm unsure if it's related or not?” but as well as everything else i'm simultaneously having one one those Everything I Have Ever Written Am Writing Or Could Write Is Utter Fucking Dogshit sort of moments (like, i know i'm not a great writer—which is not derogatory and just fact and 100% absolutely fine—but i'm usually at peace with the strange little oneshots i puke out, y'know?) which is yet another reason for me to disappear off here for the time being as i sadly have one of those unhealthy irrational relationships with fandom that's like I Don't Deserve To Be Here If I'm Not Being Useful—which i know is dumb af and i would absolutely try to coax anyone else out of if it were them saying it and not me, but alas poor yorick. thing is, i used to be incredibly prolific in making fanart, for loads of different fandoms, and that too has dwindled considerably over the last year or more (god, is it that long?) therefore it's just a double whammy currently with the writing now also taking a hit. and i know, i know, whomp whomp poor me etc etc i just—i fear whenever i disappear, i won't ever be able to make it back... bleugh horrid lol

obviously i can't seem to be normal about anything ever so i'm sorry if this is a weird way to respond to nothing happening that nobody asked about (there is no 'if'; it absolutely is weird but i'm afraid it is what it is) and i truly don't need anything from anybody, i just think me posting this and saying how i'm feeling will probably be doing me a bit of good. honestly, pls feel free to ignore, this is just cathartic for me. but i guess, at the same time, as well as those things, me being on the spectrum means i'm not skilled at keeping friendships going, which makes me very sad, so this is maybe me voicing those fears in an attempt to combat them becoming a reality? i think? it's just that i've already drifted away from too many lovely people here due to the affects of these things and i'm therefore just—i think i'm just really trying in my own odd little way.

anyways i'm gonna go rewatch some sense8 and sob out my own weight in tears and snot and just keep on keeping on with existential crisis #4793 for the time being until something shifts in me and then i'll be back at some point? yeah, i think that sounds about right.

love you guys big much (one of my son's isms from when he was little) <3

ps just realised i wrote this on my buddie blog and really can't be arsed copying and pasting it over to my main @all-or-nothing-baby... so anybody who was wondering, yeah it's me yer boi cassidy xp also if you read this far you're insane and i love you even more for it <3

[edutainer2022]

Oooh from the procrastination one, 5,7&8? :D

Thank you for the asks!

⚠️Which wip your most likely to finish or update next?

I honestly have no idea. My mind is a merry-go-round between an angsty Scott and the Mechanic character clash, a different TV-21 thing that I've had in a draft for over a year, a John and Scott thing, a happier post Jeff's return thing I've been also meaning to do for quite some time, and a reply to a prompt that's also been in a draft a while. But mostly I'm so tired these days that my writing brain is empty. Maybe it'll be something else entirely, that has been rotating in my mind, or something new.

🖍Post Any sentence from your wip

1) From how that day started he had no way to deduce to end up there.

2) "Dad! Are you telling me to get lost?!"

3) The last thing Scott is on record to actually enjoy was being a rescue scout, and Gordon's not old enough to even remember that.

4) Maybe John, pale in the doorway, didn't need to know that.

♻️A scrapped idea for your current WIP

Maybe a break-down in the shrubbery scene, because I kinda think they're not leaving the venue, after all. And, believe it or not, maybe a vaguely implied sex scene (the jury's still out on that one). Those are from different stories)))

[metalbvcky]

Badly explained WIPs tag

Tagged by @zenaidamacrouras1, thank you so much! You know I love these author procrastination writing games. These are all Stucky, obviously. If you keep up with my writer-tag updates you might recognize a couple of these 😉

Rules: Explain each of your WIPs badly, then have people vote on them in a poll. Reveal the name of the winning WIP afterwards.

My body is like a prison, and I hate my life. No one can save me. But I don't need help. I'm fine. *narrator voice: he was, in fact, not fine* Enter: a noble doctor who believes Mr. I'm Not Dying™ is worth saving.

I flew home for the weekend excited to see old friends. Then my ex waltzed back into my life. And now I'm planning to move back across the coast. At least the rent comes with a sweet puppy.

I am afraid of my husband. Okay, not really. But I am very aware of my husband's knife collection. I only wished I knew what a shit day would result in. Bad, very, very bad things.

I'm a hard-working man. The muscle, the tan, the strength. I have it all. I don't, however, know how to drive a 1982 Ford pickup while a stranger— I almost drove into a ditch. It was that good.

I. AM. NOT. A. BOTTOM.

Zero pressure tagging: @sparkagrace @blackwood4stucky @apple-writes @otpcutie @lavenderbuckyy

[ezziefox]

The Reason Why I Can't Move On in Writing + more depressing thoughts

I think I just realized why it's so hard for me to surpass three or four chapters max when I begin to write my new books, or why I always find myself taking a break and taking forever to get back to it, and when I do, the momentum that might've never been there in the first place is lost and I don't know where to pick back up in my WIP.

I recently became more and more aware of how much time I spend on social media. But that's not the big issue I'm talking about here. It's my attention span and my anxiety.

Addressing the Anxiety

There are a lot of things in my life that I get anxiety about, and it largely comes into play whenever I'm writing in my free time. As I still attend high school, I don't get much free time, but even in my free time I fret about how much time I have. Because when I write, I love to get lost in it, listening to my music and all. But, as a person who has a strong hatred for my school especially and nothing can ever fix that hatred (the pandemic ruined everything for me in that regards), every time I open Word or some other app to begin my writing, instead of thinking about getting lost in my work and getting in the moment and writing seamlessly like I did when I first discovered Wattpad back in the summer of 2020, I instead focus on how much time I have to write what I want to.

And because of this constant timer and thought in the back of my head, instead of getting lost in what I love to do, I am instead constantly fearful and anxious of my time running out before I have to go to bed to return to the very place that depresses and maddens me to my core. And I have nothing nor no one to blame but my own mental health. But I still can never find myself liking school to at least make myself feel better. I wish I could attend a different school, even in a different country. I really wish I could have a restart so that I can have an open mind and freeer mind to continue doing what I love.

And in times when I get endless time like I've never before like summer, that idea of endless time and "soon I'll be able to do what I want to do with no push or setbacks" quickly dries up and goes out the door. Especially when my trip is close to ending, all I can ever really think about is how much time I have left. I'd rather spend it procrastinating and "having fun" whilst still realizing that it will come to an end, rather than get lost in my writing and when I shut the computer and look up, it's time for all fun to end — the free paper is burned.

I genuinely don't know how I'm going to get through this part without a complete mind reset and change of environment. As it goes for the mind reset part, my mind will never change. Not without a significant change in my life. And I hate that. But my mind refuses to be unstuck from the place it is in now.

As for...

Addressing My Short Attention Span

Because of the aforementioned anxiety with time I addressed, I've begun to consume my media (entertainment & procrastination) in short form so that it feels like I've gotten in so much fun in such a short time that I feel satisfied. How to explain this in simpler terms?.... Well.... I'm constantly fearful and anxious of my free time ending that I convince myself it's been longer than it's truly been by watching short-form content such as YT shorts, Instagram reels, and when I watch actual full-length videos, instead of watching completely through the video, I simply listen to it for a short while, and to get the gist of it and thoughts on it, I read through the comments while watching as little of it as I need to before I quickly lose interest and go find a different video to watch.

Tonight, as I write this to save it as a draft to post tomorrow, I've been trying to fix my attention span by sitting through some of the old content I used to watch, that being documentary-type videos. It's been going well so far. I've sat through all the videos and seldom went to the comment section. I didn't skip through any of them or anything like that. However, I did stop in the middle of one video to come and write this right now. I knew I could've waited until tomorrow, but I feared I wouldn't have been able too convey the emotions of realization that I am feeling right now as well and explain it as well as I am feeling it.

——

I'm hoping that this truly is my issue, and that once I fix my attention span, I can at least get through writing more chapters, no matter how long it takes. I'm fully aware that especially once school starts back, so will the anxiety leeching itself onto me. But anything is better than nothing, right?

Sigh.

If you're just like me, or something like it, my advice to address and sort out your attention span. And if it's within your reach and capability, your anxiety too. It's these things that hold us back from accomplishing anything in life, and writing is something we wish to accomplish, so if you can, find a way to conquer them. Do what I currently can't.

All of this deeply saddens me. I don't know where to go next, if I even want to move, or what will find its way to me next. Needless to say, I don't have much hopes for the future, but at the same time I do.

I like to tell myself I always give up, and then I realize that I never truly do and it's always f*cking with me. Sometimes I wish I would just give up, because no matter how much I want things or desperately hope that some miracle will grant certain things in my life, I always end up f-cking myself over in the end. I am mentally f-cked and tired. No matter how many breaks I get, it never seems to be enough for me.

And I always want more. I get told I already have everything. It's just so much going on in my life from family, to friends, to my own mind that just constantly fucks me over and disregards me in every way. I don't want to drop any personal information regarding the people around me, so that's all I'm gonna say about that.

You know, today I realized that it's one thing: being a kid and never truly realizing how much something or someone in your life is mentally f-cking you over, versus growing older and you're only a teen and you realize it in real time as it's happening. Earlier I wished that I could just be the former: be a kid that doesn't realize the mental gravity and toll that's being taken on me as I have no one but my cousin in my life that truly understands me and went through the same experiences as me and it's mentally f_cked her too.

[helioscenic]

WRITEBLR INTRODUCTION ||

Hello! My name is August, I'm 23, nonbinary and gay as hell. I work retail irl (someone save me pls) and write in my spare time, I'm hoping this blog will help keep me accountable with my writing as I tend to procrastinate.

MY WRITING ||

I write queer fantasy with a focus on exploring themes of monstrosity, family and identity. (If you notice an abundance of snarky, dark haired protagonists then shhh, no you don't)

This is not my main, I'll probably tag any asks I send with this url just so you know it's me because my main is a retired blog from an old and embarrassing fandom lmao.

I would love to participate in ask and tag games, feel free to tag me if you're stuck for blogs! Also feel free to tag me in any fantasy wips taglists because I guaranteed will love it.

Anyway, thanks for checking in on my blog! I hope you find something you like 😊

(wips under the cut)

MY WIPS ||

(working titles subject to change)

EYE OF LEVIATHAN WIP

High Fantasy, Exploration of the 'Chosen One' Trope

When a man intent on finding redemption in the small mundanity of life is forced back onto the gameboard of dragons and kingdoms and war, will his past be the thing that saves them all or damns them?

TITHED WIP

Political Fantasy, Arranged Marriage

In a land weary of war, the Tithed are the arranged marriages made between once opposed nations, symbols of the Accords and the hope for peace to come. But not everyone is content in peace.

TAGLISTS ||

E0L WIP; @serpentarii

R&R; @cream-and-tea

GENERAL; @wildswrites @strangerays

Let me know if you want me to add you to the taglists for my wips!

[pimosworld]

Pairing-Joel Miller x reader

Summary-Joel conquers his fear to watch you walk across that stage.

CW-18+, No outbreak Joel Miller, unspecified age gap, reader is in college but can be any age, No description of reader other than they wear heels, Joel has agoraphobia, mentions of panic attack, mentions of large crowds and over coming that fear, reader is highly decorated, mentions of spicy times but no smut, angst, fluff, more fluff, Joel being obsessed with you.

WC-1.3k

A\N- This idea literally came to me in a dream so it’s just another procrastination for my other wips 😂. I write while I help my mom with chemo and It helps writing fluffy stuff so I hope you enjoy.

[Joel Miller Masterlist][Main Masterlist]

Not beta read

Collegiate

Joel’s not a fan of large crowds- well the crowds don’t have to be very large. More than ten people and he starts to sweat a little. Too many people to talk to. Too many chances at getting stuck in conversations he could care less about. 

  He’s starting to feel it now as he weaves his way through the sea of families. Groups of faces that look similar, matriarchs and patriarchs seated and gushing about their babies who aren’t really babies anymore at this high level of educational accomplishment. 

  One too many old ladies pointing him out as he finds an open seat hoping he can pretend not to hear the hushed whispers of ‘he must be married’ or ‘if i was a younger woman’. 

  He rubs his hand nervously along the back of his neck as he remembers those breathing techniques you told him about. You’d said the first time you noticed him gripping your hand a little tighter at the farmers market or the time at the movies when he wouldn’t stop checking the exits that maybe he had a little phobia. He can’t remember the name right now, maybe arachnophobia or somethin’. You are always so much better than him with words and explanations. 

  Right now though he breathes in through his nose and out through his mouth as the sound of the crowd dies down a little. 

  The announcements start for the English majors and his eyes are focused on the decorated caps. You’d kept it a secret all week while you were getting ready, promising to show him when it was all over. The ridiculous amount of gems and glue had him a bit worried of what the outcome would look like. 

  He’s trying to care about the other names but in reality there’s just one he wants to hear come over the loudspeaker. It drones on as each person smiles and shakes the hand of the men and women who selfishly collect money from them when they’ve yet to get their lives started. The woos from the families lull him into a sense of calmness and he nearly misses it when they announce you. 

  His ears perk up at the last name Miller and he’s not fully expecting to see you as you squeeze the hand of your friend next to you and head towards the stage. He’s still getting used to hearing his last name attached to yours and the pride swells in him as you cross the stage beaming from ear to ear as you accept your diploma. You don’t bother searching the crowd for family you know wouldn’t care and hasn’t cared in some time about your life and personal achievements. 

  He’s made it more than clear to you that he’s all the family you need. When he sees the way you are with his brother and Sarah he can’t help but think about what a loss it is for your estranged family. Their loss is his gain and he’d be a fool to let you slip away now that he’s got you branded with his name. 

  As you take your seat again he gets a good look at your cap, the sun catches it just right as the sparkles shine along the edges. The loud laugh that erupts from him startles the old woman next to him and he has to excuse himself as he covers his smile with his hand. Tommy will get a kick out of this later on when he sees it. He’s busy finishing up at the construction site so he can join the rest of them at the surprise party that Sarah and Maria insisted on throwing you at the last minute. 

  He steps out into the hallway with some of the other families as the ceremonies come to a close. He’s so excited and anxious to see you that he’s completely forgotten about his claustrophobia or whatever it’s called. Probably still the wrong name but he doesn’t really care as he starts to see the people filing out of the auditorium and running to greet their families. 

  You come out almost last walking hand in hand with one of your friends and your cap clutched between your fingers in the other. You give her a kiss on the cheek as you part ways and smile to yourself no doubt relieved and proud of yourself for finally finishing. He can finally get a good look at your ensemble, your shoulder adorned with all sorts of different color ropes and sashes. He listened to you explain what each one meant to Sarah the other night over dinner and he couldn’t have been more excited to think about her wearing them one day soon. 

  He can tell you didn’t expect him to be there as you make your way towards the exit, you stiffen as he gently places his hands on your shoulders. 

  “Where ya goin so fast darlin’?” You gasp before turning around as he cautiously kisses your neck, sending shivers down your spine. 

  He can smell your new perfume, the one he got you as an early graduation present. You were still so stubborn about asking for things you wanted and he saw you eyeing it in the mall and then he caught you smelling the page insert of that magazine you liked with the scent. 

  “Joel, what are you doing here?” You turn around leaping into his arms, squeezing the life out of him as he chuckles into your hair. 

  “Did ya think I was gonna miss this?” His southern accent comes out thicker and slurred when he’s in your presence, much more relaxed when he can touch and feel that you’re real. “It’s not everyday that my girl graduates from college.” He sets you down lightly on your heels, just about the only bit of skin he can see as the gown dwarfs the rest of you. He still doesn’t know how you walk in those things but he won’t complain when it’s all that you’re wearing at the end of the night. 

  You wipe the stray tears that have shed careful not to ruin your makeup. “I wouldn’t have been upset if you didn’t come.” You look around the hallway noticing most of the families have cleared. “That was a lot of people to handle with your agoraphobia, I’m proud of you.” 

  He snaps his fingers “agoraphobia.” 

  He closes the small space between you holding your face between his large palms. He kisses you like he’s been away at war, like it’s the last time he’ll kiss you or perhaps the first time and he can’t get enough. All the swell of emotions as you take in the fact that he wasn’t one for pda and now he’s got his tongue down your throat and you’re practically moaning at the way he consumes you. 

  He breaks the kiss momentarily as you catch your breath. You duck your head into his chest as he laughs quietly holding you close to him. 

  “What’s so funny Joel?” 

  “Oh nothin, I just find it funny that you’re proud of me. Figured it should be the other way around, don't you?” His eyebrows raise at you and then flit to the cap dangling in your hand. “Let’s see it then.” 

  You smile all innocently at him as you hand it over. A hint of mischief behind it and he can’t help but think about what’s usually happening when you look at him that way. 

  In large rhinestones reads Sponsored by Miller and Co. 

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