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roosterforme · 2 months ago

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Yours Truly, Bradley Bradshaw Part 24 | Rooster x Reader

Summary: Bradley intended to take care of a few important things while he had the week off from work, but a quick visit to base brought with it a change of plans.

Warnings: Angst, fluff, adult language, smut, very hands-on Bradley, spanking, 18+

Length: 3500 words

Pairing: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x Female teacher!Reader

Check out my masterlist for more! Yours Truly, Bradley Bradshaw masterlist

The following day, instead of dressing in a uniform or flight suit, Bradley pulled on jeans and a tropical print shirt while he watched you get yourself ready for work.

"You look cute," he murmured as you wiggled into a dress and some simple flats. "And I like it that you're officially living here now instead of just staying for a few days."

"The commute is not ideal," you told him immediately. "But this is." You placed your hand on his abs before giving him the sweetest kiss that left him soft inside. "This is ideal."

Fuck. He was so in love it was insane. As soon as he was back in your presence for a few hours, having sex and eating pasta, he could barely remember how miserable he'd been on that deployment. It was like nothing else mattered as long as he kept coming back to you.

"Let me pack your lunch," he whispered, tilting your chin up for another one of those kisses. Then he was on his way to the kitchen before he could make you late for school. Before he got home, you filled the refrigerator with everything he liked to eat, and he inhaled two yogurts and some peanut butter toast while he made your sandwich.

The notes you opened from the box he sent were on the kitchen counter, and he smiled. Nat covered for him big time on Christmas Eve so he could make that happen. He was excited to get to see her when he stopped by North Island, but he had to get you to work first.

"You don't need to drop me off. It's so far out of the way," you told him as you appeared with your tote bag. "I'll drive myself."

When he pouted, you laughed. "Come on, Gorgeous. I want to. I need to stop on base anyway."

"Oh, can you remind Marty and Nat about Career Day?" you asked, holding your bag open for your lunch.

"Nat's coming, too? You'll have the whole of the Navy there, Baby."

"The kids would love that."

Bradley narrowed his eyes. "As long as I'm still the favorite."

"You're irreplaceable," you promised.

You weren't exaggerating one bit when you said the commute was a killer. Bradley hummed along to the radio and held your hand, barely making it through the Starbucks drive-thru line and up to your school before the last minute that you needed to be there.

"I love you. Bye," you told him, kissing him quickly before jumping out the passenger door and running up the sidewalk with your enormous drink in one hand. He was absolutely addicted to the coffee now as well, and after he was sure you made it inside, he sipped his own cup as he drove back down the highway.

It was strange to be going through the guard gates this late in the morning, and when he approached the hangar in his street clothes, he heard Nat's voice and sassy whistle immediately.

"Looking good, Rooster. Did you forget to do your laundry? Did you forget what time work started while you were deployed?" she called, and he made a point to mess up her hair when she gave him a tight hug. "You're the worst."

"I missed you too, Nat," he told her with a laugh. "Thanks for looking after my girl."

She shrugged and said, "I'm always in the market for drinking wine and talking about you behind your back. Plus, she's actually great. Hanging out with her is the best."

"Yeah," he replied, laughing harder. "That's why I want to do it all the time. I intend to do it forever."

One of her dark eyebrows shot up, and she smirked as she said, "Like forever, forever?"

He ducked his head and cleared his throat. "Yeah, but engagement rings are expensive." Natasha screeched and punched him in the shoulder. "Why are you like this?" he asked as she smacked him several times and jumped around excitedly.

Bradley was saved from being attacked when Maverick walked in with his familiar clipboard in hand and a frown on his face. "Phoenix, you're supposed to be in the tower. Rooster, welcome back. Why aren't you dressed?"

"My vacation days got approved," Bradley replied as Natasha quietly crept away. "I'm off the rest of the week. Didn't anyone tell you?"

"It's probably in my emails." Maverick's frown faded away as he pulled Bradley in for a hug. "I was a little worried for a minute there that you'd end up back in Norfolk." He slapped him on the back. "If you're off all week, why are you here?"

Bradley chuckled. "I just wanted to see everyone. Like you said, I was a little worried about Norfolk, too."

Maverick eyed him closely. "And did I hear you say something about an engagement ring?"

It wasn't like there was anything to hide. Bradley figured it was pretty obvious to everyone by now that his relationship with you was the real deal. Hell, Maverick even compared it to his own parents. "Yeah, I'm going to buy one this month. I just need to juggle some finances around to make sure I can get her something really pretty. But I'm going to start looking today."

A slow nod turned into a beaming smile, and then Maverick said, "Before you do anything, I have something you might want to know about."

-----------------------------

You were dead on your feet at work. Staying up half the night making love and snuggling left you with a smile on your face, but you couldn't stop yawning. Your students noticed right away as you drained your coffee and groaned when the bell rang signaling the start of class.

"Did you have a hard time sleeping?" Jayden asked.

"A little bit," you replied, remembering the way you had to keep pinching yourself to make sure Bradley's strong arm wrapped around you all night was real.

"Was there a loud noise that kept you up?" Nia asked.

You tried not to snort as you thought about Bradley's moans and grunts in your ear as he fucked you from behind. "Something like that. It's time to review our spelling words."

Even though you insisted that Bradley didn't need to drive you to work, he did, and he promised he'd be back right on time to pick you up at the end of the day. But he was such a liar. He arrived at your classroom fifteen minutes before dismissal time with rosy cheeks and eighteen envelopes.

"Lieutenant Bradshaw's here!" Nia called out when your boyfriend knocked on the door before slipping inside.

He made a beeline right to you, placing a rather innocent kiss on your cheek. "I hope you don't mind, but I wanted to drop these off," he said, holding up the envelopes. The top one had Jackie's name on it, and your heart soared. Butterflies took off. You had to work really hard not to kiss him again.

"We don't mind," you told him, and you watched him pass out the individual notes he must have written for your students while he was deployed. All eyes were on him as he walked around your classroom, delivering envelopes and answering questions.

"When did you get home from the Atlantic Ocean?"

"Was the food good on the aircraft carrier?"

"Are you coming back for Career Day on Friday?"

Bradley took everything in stride like he always did, but his eyes returned to yours frequently, and his flushed cheeks left you feeling dizzy.

"I got home yesterday," he said, voice deep and commanding as he set the last of his envelopes down on Violet's desk. "The food was terrible. So bad. Nothing like the Pacific Fleet. Nowhere near as good as what you ate on your field trip to North Island. I'm thinking about writing a letter to complain."

"You should," Violet told him seriously. "Yummy, balanced meals are so important."

"You're so right," he replied with a nod. "And yes, I'll be back on Friday for Career Day. Your teacher worked so hard on it, I wouldn't miss it for anything." You were gripping the edge of your desk now as he smiled at you.

"I didn't know you were allowed to wear anything except your uniforms," marveled Oliver.

Bradley looked down at his patterned shirt and laughed. "Should I stick with the flight suit for Friday?"

Then the dismissal bell rang, and your kids started to scramble. You usually had them packed up and ready to go a few minutes early, but Bradley was clearly more exciting than the end of the school day.

"Don't forget about the spelling test tomorrow!" you called out as they all exited the room in a mass of chaos after high fiving your boyfriend. "Thanks for surprising us," you said as you spun to face him.

"Thanks for being so perfect that I can't stay away from you."

Your cheeks blazed with warmth as you ducked against his chest. Muscular arms wrapped you up in a hug as you muttered, "Did you remind Natasha and Marty about Friday?"

"Mmhmm."

"And did you get to see Maverick?"

He paused before squeezing you a little tighter and kissing the top of your head. "Uh, yes. I did. Now will you let me take you home so I can get back to my busy schedule of eating delicious food, napping and fucking you senseless?"

---------------------------

Bradley spent the following day unpacking more of your stuff while you were at work. You had all these fancy things he needed to make room for. Like an air fryer. And a rice cooker. Things he would have never used otherwise, but he didn't mind having them here now.

He took breaks to read from the journal you kept while he was away, often smiling and laughing at what you'd written in your daily log. It was no wonder he fell in love with you through your writing; you were just the same as you were in person and so authentic this way. Then he read about the day you helped Edith with some chores, and he sprawled out on the couch with a groan.

You were the sweetest thing in his life. One time, Vanessa told him that Edith was annoying and only wanted attention. He rolled his eyes then, and he rolled them again now. She was elderly. Of course she wanted attention. But Bradley knew she also had arthritis, and helping her with yard work was fast and painless for him. He couldn't imagine you saying anything like that.

Bradley slipped into a hazy daydream, thinking about how he wanted to propose to you as his feet hung over the end of the couch. He wasn't going to last long now, and he knew it. Not with that ring tucked away in a Zip-lock bag which was duct taped underneath the bathroom sink vanity behind the pipes. If nothing else, he knew it was there, and he could rip it down any time he felt like asking you to marry him, but he wanted it to be special. Really special.

Maybe he could write something for you. Maybe he should take you out to dinner again. There had to be a way to make it just right so you couldn't say no.

After a few more minutes of indulging in the fantasy of having you as his wife, he stood up and attempted to use the air fryer to make lunch. Pretty soon he gave up and made a sandwich instead before walking next door to knock on Edith's door.

"Bradley!" she said, pulling the door open for him. "You're home. Your girlfriend told me you were deployed earlier this month."

"I just got back on Monday. A little bruised, but no worse for the wear," he told her with a smile. "I wanted to see if you needed help with anything."

"Oh, your sweet girlfriend already changed my light bulbs for me," she told him. Then she lowered her voice and smirked. "She's a looker."

"Yeah," he confirmed with a nod. "She's Gorgeous. She also moved in with me, so if I'm not home and you need something, you can always ask her, okay?"

Edith fretted her hands, and Bradley leaned back out the open front door, knowing she wouldn't agree to his help unless she paid him in some way. Truthfully, he really did feel like playing the piano anyway. "It looks like you've got some weeds that need to be pulled, and your downspout is loose again. How about you think of a cool song to teach me, and I'll be back in like fifteen minutes?"

He ducked outside before she could answer, but he could hear her tapping away at the piano keys as he yanked some dried up weeds out of the soft soil. While he worked, he pictured the sheet music that Edith kept stacked up inside the piano bench, and he started to come up with an idea. The more he thought about the pages stacked up in his own house, the more he liked his plan.

He was all smiles when he sat down for her to teach him how to play a Bob Dylan classic, and he was still whistling the tune when he went to pick you up from work.

---------------------------

On Thursday night, Bradley had you snuggling on top of him on the couch when you should have really been going over your final plans for Career Day. "You are such a distraction," you whispered, arms and legs wrapped up with his to keep warm since you were wearing nothing but his old sweatshirt.

His fingers flexed on the back of your thigh as he smirked and turned his head to face you instead of the TV. "And you're the best for helping me relax all week." His breath was warm on your cheek, and he kissed you there, saying, "Don't stress about tomorrow. It'll be perfect."

You nuzzled your cheek against his shoulder. "I still have to put all of my guests in order. I need to schedule the most impressive presentation last, for the grand finale."

"Okay, so put me last then, Gorgeous."

You grinned and tried not to giggle. "I was actually thinking Marty."

Bradley's hand slid up from your thigh, smoothing over your butt, and you knew what was coming even before you clenched with need. Bradley smacked you one time, and you moaned as he soothed away the sting with his palm. You were instantly aroused, fingers tingling and ears burning. Bradley's dark eyes were wide, searching your face, questioning what he should do next. When you nodded once, he grunted, and that big hand landed on you again, breaking the silence.

"Fuck," you gasped, rear end stinging as Bradley cupped and squeezed you, pulling you a few inches up his body so he could kiss you. His cock was getting hard in his gym shorts, pressing against your belly, driving you wild.

"You like that?" he whispered between heated kisses, but you barely wanted to take the time to breathe.

"Yes," you replied, mouth mashing against his. Both of his hands came up to your waist, yanking the sweatshirt over your head and dropping it on the floor. Then your lips were back on his as you moaned into his mouth.

The sex had been so sweet since he got home, and neither of you could be blamed for wanting so much of it after going so long without. But this was something else. Bradley's fingers dug into your flesh, and his kisses were rough. Demanding. You spread your legs a little wider, arching your back, silently begging for him to spank you again.

He did not disappoint.

You were aching, whining his name, enthralled by the cocky smirk on his face and the possessiveness in his eyes. "You want more, Gorgeous?" he asked, voice dark as his smirk grew. When you nodded vigorously, he kissed your lips so softly before he said, "You'll schedule me last for Career Day? I think it's where I belong, since I'm the most impressive."

Oh my god. He was playing with you now. You knew he wasn't actually jealous of Marty or Nat or any of the classroom parents, but he knew that you knew that your students would always think he was the most impressive. You would, too.

When you tried to kiss him, he pulled his face away from yours as he stroked your tender rear end with his fingertips. "Yes," you promised, "I'll put you last. You're the most impressive."

"Good girl."

You gasped as he spanked you one more time, then he kissed you before pushing you up so you were straddling his thighs. When he yanked down his gym shorts, you were treated to the sight of his cock, thick and hard, smacking against his abs.

"Clearly I think you're impressive," he grunted, licking his thumb before running it along your swollen clit. It took no more coaxing before you had your hand wrapped around his cock, guiding him right where you wanted. You sank down on him, already a mess as he thrust up into you, hard.

"Bradley!" His hands were on your breasts, cupping you as he bucked his hips up again.

"Look at you," he rasped, fucking you rough while his hands were gentle. You bounced up and down, bracing yourself awkwardly on the too small couch. "Where do you want me to touch you?" he asked, eyes glued on your face and body. "Show me."

Without hesitation, you wrapped your fingers around his right wrist and moved his hand back to your butt. "A little more," you told him, voice shaking as he fucked you so good. Then he spanked you again and again, and you could feel it everywhere as you cried out.

It was too much and not enough, and you bit your lip as he alternated between soothing you and spanking you until you were shaking, orgasm building. "Baby, you look and feel too good like this," he whined, wrapping his hands around your hips. "I'm so close."

But you were already there. You came as you leaned down and kissed him, those big hands sliding up, stroking your shoulders and neck as gently as you were used to while your ass tingled. You were making some wild sounds as you rode him until he filled you with his cum, then the two of you were panting in unison as your forehead came to rest against his.

You could feel him smiling, mustache brushing your lips as he said, "That was fun. Didn't know you would like it so much."

You moaned and said, "I'm as surprised as you are. And I'll put you last tomorrow. You're the grand finale. Obviously."

"Obviously," he agreed. "Just keep in mind, I'll be more than happy to spank you when you give me a hard time like that again." His lips found the side of your neck, his cock was still inside you as he murmured, "Got it?"

"Oh, loud and clear."

He chuckled, nipping along your skin as your butt throbbed a bit. You didn't want to move, but his stomach started loudly growling. Carefully, you started to sit up, brushing your fingers through his hair as you said, "It's been hours since you ate. Let's find something in the kitchen."

When you stood on wobbly legs, Bradley stayed lounging on the couch, guiding you and turning you so he could place one soft kiss on the spot on your butt where he had spanked you. Then he got to his feet as well, picked up the sweatshirt, and put it back on you.

He kissed the back of your neck and told you he never wanted to leave you again while you made him a grilled cheese sandwich. "Love you too much," he muttered, hand on your thigh as his leg brushed your tender rear end.

You thought about the weeks he was deployed without communication and how awful it was, but this right here was worth it. Making love in bed and rough sex on the couch. Learning what makes each other tick and sharing meals and enjoying how good it feels to have him hold you. All worth it.

When the sandwich was ready, you cut it into four triangles and took a small bite out of one before holding it up for him to eat it. "Thanks, Baby," he whispered, finishing it in one bite before you fed him the second one and then the third in similar fashion. He was finishing the last piece when he wrapped his arms around you and said, "Okay, Gorgeous, now I'm ready to help you get organized for Career Day before bed."

You laughed. "I just need to write a few things down and pick out an outfit."

"Oh. I wouldn't wear anything too tight," he suggested, smirking once more. "You're about to be sore tomorrow."

---------------------------------

Okay, Maverick. Okay. Career Day is up next, and I need something nice to be there for Marty. Thanks @beyondthesefourwalls

PART 25

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natalievoncatte · 7 months ago

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The palm-print panel was cool under Lena’s touch. She pressed her hand to the rectangular plate next to her front door and waited for the brief moment it needed to scan her skin. The door unlocked with a meaty thump and she pushed it open with her other hand, absently checking her phone as she stepped inside. As the system scanned her biometrics, it detected stress and dimmed the lights, automatically turned on the television to an abstract screen saver with cool tones, and began to play an arrangement for a violins to soothe her nerves.

She kicked off her heels and walked barefoot into the kitchen, where she skipped the countertop wine cellar and pulled out the half-empty box of Trader Joe’s vintage that she’d taken a liking to thanks to Kara. She pours herself half a tumbler full as a silent fuck you to her mother and took a swig, then walked out into her living room to sit down in the gloom for a few minutes and think.

Supergirl was sitting on her couch, head flopped back over the back so that her hair fanned out across the white leather. She sat splayed with her knees apart and legs out, arms resting on her thighs. Lena wasn’t sure if she was awake.

As she drew closer, she caught a small gasp. Supergirl had a black eye, and there were scrapes on her cheeks and the backs of her hands, the blood barely crusted. Both her hands and her face were bruised and she had a tiny split in her lip.

Lena placed the wine on the table, nerves jangling when the bottom rattled against the pale marble from the shaking of her hand. Her heart raced as she drew closer. Supergirl had taken off her cape and draped it over the couch. It was none the worse for wear but was covered in scorch marks.

Suoergirl’s broad chest heaved once and she let out a long, pained sigh.

“Hi.”

“Hello, Supergirl.”

She let out a little laugh, wincing. “Do we need be so formal?”

“I don’t have anything else to call you,” Lena said, coolly. “Mind if I ask why you’re in my apartment?”

“You don’t lock the balcony doors. You should.”

Lena sighed and folded her arms. “I said why, not how.”

Supergirl didn’t look at her.

“I just got the snot beaten out of me. Everything hurts.”

“I didn’t think that was possible.”

How was it possible? Curiosity tugged at her, but concern shot through it, making her fidget with her hands. Lena hated fidgeting. It made her look weak, and she could still remember the pain when Lillian cracked the ruler across her knuckles to break the habit.

“Can I have some wine?”

Lena swallowed hard.

“Sure,” she said.

She went to the kitchen and poured. When she returned to the living room, Supergirl was sitting up, hunched forward and leaning on he knees. Lena started a little at the sight. Sitting that way displayed the wide, muscular set of her shoulders and arms, especially her meaty biceps. Her back was a rare sight -she wore a cape, after all- and just as exquisitely muscled.

She was looking at her hands, at the damage to her muscles. Lena offered the glass and she took it. Her fingers were warm when they brushed against Lena’s, strangely soft.

Supergirl took a long pull of wine and smacked her lips, then winced.

“It’s times like this I wish I could get drunk.”

“You can’t?”

“Not on wine and not for very long.”

“Interesting.”

“So I have a problem,” Supergirl said. She was still looking at her hands.

“And that is?”

“I have to call off work tomorrow. These will heal, and I’ll look exactly the same. I don’t get scars anymore. But they’ll be visible for a day or so.”

“I see.”

“But I have to get brunch with someone, and they’ll be able to tell. Concealer won’t do much for this.” She touched her eye, wincing.

“Wait here,” said Lena.

She came back a moment later with some wash clothes soaked in cold water on a tray. Hands still shaking a little as she placed it on the table. Tenderly, she took one of the washcloths and dabbed the back of Supergirl’s hands, cleaning away the grime and dried blood from the abrasions.

Supergirl sighed. “That feels good. Thank you.”

“May I?” said Lena.

Supergirl hesitated, doubt flashing deep within the endless depths of her blue eyes, but she turned to Lena and tilted up her chin. With shaking fingers, Lena cupped Supergirl’s face gently and used a fresh cloth to clean and cool the cut on her lip. Supergirl closed her eyes and sighed.

Lena’s eyes wandered up, to the small mark above her eye.

“You don’t scar. Did you get that on Krypton?”

“Yes. I slipped and fell when I was a little girl. You should have seen me. I bled all over.”

“Must be nice, not getting hurt anymore. Not feeling pain.”

“I still feel it.”

Lena paused.

“I feel every bullet and blow and bomb blast just like anyone would,” said Supergirl. Just because it doesn’t harm me doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt me.”

“I’m sorry. I had no idea.”

“It’s okay,” said Supergirl.

She opened her eyes -eye- and looked at Lena reverently, one pretty blue eye glittering while the other remained bruised shut. She smiled a lopsided, honest smile, looked at Lena in a dreamy, almost adoring way that-

Wait.

“Oh my God,” Lena breathed.

“Hi,” said Kara.

“Oh my God. Oh my God,” Lena whispered. “Oh my God, what happened, how did this happen to you? You’re hurt!”

“I had a tough time with a very determined alien and had to worry about civilians,” said Kara. “It happens.”

Lena’s pulse raced and her breath quickened. Her gaze darted, searching and noticing every detail. She was so beautiful, and she was so Kara.

“Why now?” said Lena. “Why this time?”

“I don’t know.”

Lena bit her lip, and the tiny gesture had a noticeable impact on Kara. Her eyes widened and her gaze fell to Lena’s bottom lip, then flicked back up.

“So your brunch,” said Lena. “That was with me.”

“Yeah. I thought about cancelling but I can’t. I needed to see you now.”

Lena shifted closer on the couch, until they were hip to hip.

“Why?”

“Because I just got punched in the head by an alien with big stupid bone spurs coming out of his fist and I need to see you. I won, by the way. It was really cool. I ripped a fire hydrant out of the ground and hit him with it.”

Lena looked her up and down. Her jaw began to quiver.

“Oh God. Is it worse than it looks? Are you hurt worse than you look, Kara? Are you…”

Kara shook her head, then winced. “No. Not that bad, promise. I just…” she sighed. “I’m tired of going to lay on a sunbed and going back to my empty apartment and spend a sick day napping on the couch.”

Lena let out a slow breath. “So you came to see me.”

“Yuuup,” Kara said, slowly.

Lena shifted awkwardly in her seat. Kara slowly reached over with her now clean hand and curled her fingers around Lena’s chin.

“Lena?” she whispered. “Is this okay?”

“Yes.”

Kara turned and leaned into her, pressing the slightest, lightest kiss to Lena’s lips, not a quick peck but something slow and soft, warm and inviting.

“Ow,” Kara muttered.

“Kara,” Lena whispered.

“I have any idea. Since I can’t make brunch… how about breakfast?”

Lena leaned against her, gently draping her arms around her as they fell back into the soft cushions together.

“Okay.”

#supercorp #supergirl fanfiction #supergirl #supercorp fanfic #lena luthor #kara danvers #kara x lena #karlena #supergirl fanfic #supercorp fluff #tooth rotting fluff #so much fluff #total fluff #fluffalicious #here at Natalie’s fluff depot we have all the fluff you could ever want

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compressingsins · 1 year ago

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Jjk Men x chubby reader honeymoon Pt. 1

ft. Sukuna , Gojo , Nanami , Toji , and Naoya

Minors, do not read this, it’s nothing but smut. Pretty much jjk men and how their wife celebrates their wedding during their honeymoon.

Please do not copy or rewrite my works without my permission. 🫥

Sukuna - Your husband Ryomen Sukuna never seemed like the romantic type, which he wasn't. But for you, he didn't mind bringing you to this waterfall picnic, in a secluded oasis in the woodlands that was owned by a rich family. You were sitting underneath the waterfall, just taking in the gorgeous view of it, holding a glass of wine in your left hand. The view was gorgeous, a swimming hole was being filled by the waterfall, the was filled with coy fish.

Sukuna was setting up the picnic table that was big enough for the two of you, and you still couldn't believe how romantic this was. Sukuna even dressed up for you, which was also such a rare thing for him to do. You enjoyed this, though, smiling due to him finishing setting up the table, now sitting across from you. He wasn't expressing it, but you knew he was enjoying this just as much as you were.

"Thank you so much for doing this, baby. It really means a lot to me, especially after the week we've had." You two just got married a week ago, and now this celebration was going to also last a week long. You've been waiting for this moment your entire relationship with your now husband, and he'd be lying if he said he wasn't waiting for the same thing. "It's really gorgeous out here, especially the coy fish, birds, oasis, and waterfall—oh my god!"

He loved seeing you this happy, so he couldn't help himself as he reached over the table to grab your hand with your wedding band on it. That of course got your attention, romantic Sukuna, was one of the best versions he's ever displayed to you. You loved him no matter what, but this was amazing. "I never thought I'd be telling anyone that I loved them. Not on the extent to which I am loving you, ____. This day is all about us, nothing or no one will ruin it."

Your heart throbbed so much for your husband, especially after he leaned over the table to kiss your plump lips, your left hand placing the glass of wine down so you could interlace your fingers together. The kiss was full on tongue boxing, your lips meshing together as the wetness from your saliva's joining and coating the thickness of your lips. Sure enough, Sukuna needed way more of you.

Nsfw —

You found yourself bent over the picnic table, thick fingers tangled in the locks of your hair as another huge hand smacked red prints into your plump ass. "Look at your ass jiggling on my cock, ____. Fuck, you've always been so beautiful." His free hand went to your thick hips to harshly pull you against his abdomen, his cock always splitting you in two. "You don't know how majestic you fucking look right now."

You couldn't register his words, especially with the way his cock so delicious slide throughout the spongy soft and sensitive interior and your pussy. All you could hear was his deep groans and the wetness of your pussy when his dick pierced precisely against that tingly spot inside of you. Sukuna loved how your body reacted to him, especially when your body released fluids that only he could ever make your body release.

"Fuck, look at you creaming on my cock. The wine was supposed to get you drunk and groggy, but apparently my dick is even better, huh?" You were definitely drunk on his dick, but not from the wine, literally from how addicting his cock fucked your pulsing and dripping pussy just right. "You're fucking cumming for me already, ____? Come here." He chuckled, yanking you up to stand on your feet and against his chest, one arm wrapped in between your breasts, the other reaching around to place thick finger's against your throbbing clit.

This only drove him to fuck your harder, "I'm gonna cum inside this time, ____. It's our honeymoon, why not make it even more special?" Your body trembling against his only egged him to go faster and deeper, he knew you wanted the same thing. "Just a little more baby, come on. Fucking cum with me!" His rumbling voice was all it took to get you there, along with himself, his other arm securing a spot back around you so he could hold you tightly as you both released harshly against one another.

Him not pulling out was the best feeling in the world, his lips landing against the back of your neck, sinking his teeth in only to slightly pierce the flesh. Sukuna let you rest against the table, but he didn't pull out. Instead, he placed both hands on the sides of your body, leaning over the table to whisper to you, "Come on ____, you always take my dick so well. You're definitely insane, if you think we're done."

Toji - Laying in a cozy log cabin, you were currently enjoying a tv show. The smell of food engulfed your nostrils, the holes flaring up from how delightfully pleasant the smell was. Your now husband, Toji Fushiguro, was putting his cooking skills to the test for you in the kitchen of the log cabin he rented for three whole days, for the both of you to enjoy.

Knowing that Toji was married before, you didn't think that he would've popped the big question on you so suddenly one day, but you did not regret it. Him getting down on one knee and saying those four magic words, "Will you marry me?" Is always the reoccurring memory in your head. You didn't think Toji loved you that much, up until that day where he finally asked you to marry him, the most special day of your life.

"I see you're still in a good mood, ____." A deep voice spoke from the doorway of your shared room, and of course it was your husband Toji. Standing with his arms crossed over his chest, shirtless with only pajama bottoms on, he smiled handsomely at you like he always do. It was his one way of teasing you, because he knew you loved every small thing about him. Walking up to the bed you were laying upon, Toji settled himself on top of you and in between your plus thighs, his arms wrapped around your waist as he stared up lovingly at your face.

Placing your hand on his head, you smiled at Toji and said, "This is the best moment of my life, Toji. I'm glad that we were able to spend this time together." You slowly stroked Toji's black locks, staring down at his handsome before bringing your other hand to his face, slowly tracing the scar permanently imbedded on the corner of his mouth. "Besides, the food that you're cooking smells really good too. I'm taking it as the food is done?" You asked.

With a groan and shrug Toji replied with, "Hm, well yeah. But you know what tastes as good as it smells?" Your husband asked with a sly smirk, and you already knew exactly what he was mentioning, especially when his arms tightened around you. "We been here ever since 8 o'clock this morning, and now it's what-" He asked and looked to the night stand with the clock on it displayed 8:41 at night. "8 p.m. How about we enjoy a special treat, then eat together?"

Nsfw —

"I love how you shake, when you're taking my cock, baby. Look at how sexy you are—fuck!" A deep grumble erupted from Toji as he slowly but surely drilled his thick girth against your velvety walls. Your body always reacted in such a over dramatic way, every drag and pull of his cock against your walls sending a tingling sensation throughout your abdomen, as if every thrust he delivered was an orgasm in itself.

He loved putting you in missionary, so your plush body could receive stimulation in deeper areas to where you could almost instantly cum on his cock. His hand was wrapped tightly around your throat, your wind pipe struggling to get air, though you and Toji both loved it, especially since the sensation made your walls tighten impossibly harder against the thick organ that was fucking itself in and out of your deliciously fat cunt.

Toji loved this kind of love making with you, one hand around your throat, the other against the mattress you two laid upon to hold himself up and watch every part of you. His eyes trailed to watch his cock that continued sinking into your heat, his tongue sticking out from how erratic your clit looked from swelling and twitching from the way he pumped himself into you.

Your arousal coated his cock every time he pulled out, a slick white sheen decorated the black hairs at the base of his cock and made him impossibly harder. Your hand went to his wrist, getting Toji's eyes back on your face and he smiled in victory as he heard you struggling trying to speak, "Toji— fu— fuck! I— ugh— Toji!" Was all you could produce, your eyes rolling back as your walls clenched uncontrollably until he hit the back of your cunt, your pussy basically trapping him inside as it creamed harshly from the strong orgasm. "Toji—!"

Your voice reached an octave that he has never heard before, but the hard clench from your cunt instantly made him shoot thick jets of hot cum into your tight walls. His eyes sealed shut and his body twitched, though he wasn't done, his arms wrapped around you and held you close to him. "I'm glad you're a Fushiguro now, baby." Toji continued to slowly fuck into you, hearing squeals from you everytime he thrusted into you. "It's our honeymoon baby, we gotta keep this up."

Naoya - You didn't know how to describe this feeling. Absolutely terrifying, shocking, downright frightening, you didn't know. Your husband Naoya Zenin thought that facing your fears would be an appropriate experience on one of the most important day of your entire life. You were so many feet in the air, on a private jet that Naoya purchased just for you two. You enjoyed the time you two were sharing, but this jet experience turned your stomach.

He was comforting you every second though, and you didn't know that private jets had dedicated 'bedrooms' with classic King-size beds for total rest and relaxation on board and master suites. That part was very nice to know, but you still found discomfort in it. You both layed together in bed, the night being young and beautiful as he continued trying to get you to look outside the window that was above your bed.

You, however, were just clinging tightly to his shirtless chest, his arms wrapped securely around you to try and get you to calm down but it just wasn't working. "Honey, why are you so afraid? Just look at how beautiful the city looks from here, it's almost, just almost as beautiful as you are." But you weren't going for that, this was the scariest thing you've ever had to do in your life, and doing it on your honeymoon just wasn't making it better.

"Baby, come on, please?" He sighed out as you snuggled up tighter to his muscular chest, not letting him go for a second. "Look, if anything happens while we're on this jet, you know that I could save us both. No matter how high we are, you and I both will be fine, I promise." Naoya assured, his large hands rubbing soothing circles on your back. "You have nothing to fear in the presence of me, ____, and you know this. I want to enjoy this, but with you."

He sounded so sad that you couldn't help but look up at him. "But Naoya, it's just so scary." You confessed once again.

Thinking to himself, Naoya sat himself up with you following. "Listen baby. You hear that?" He asked as a brow of yours raised in question. "Does it sound like our jet is going to malfunction any second?" You could hear nothing, but the sound of the jet blades spinning on the outside. "Now look—look at that." Naoya smiled, taking your hand and slowly lifting you both up to look out the window above your bed. He settled himself behind you, his arms around your waist, and his head on your shoulder. Your breathing and body instantly calmed, "Look at how beautiful the city is from above, baby. Almost as beautiful as you." He softly spoke, his hands wandering your body as his lips planted a gentle kiss against your temple.

Nsfw —

With one big hand on the back of your head, and the other wrapped tightly around your throat, your body was puzzled together with your husbands. The slow upward thrust of his cock battered precisely against your delicate spots that had your mind racing like a track full of horses. His grip on your throat was tight, his hand holding your head still as you were forced to look at the city that he found so beautiful and adored so much.

"You're enjoying this now, aren't you ___? City looks really beautiful, right?" He was so cocky, knowing that when he made love to you, it would always be the best that you've ever had and he took pride in that. So he felt as if he could talk to you in whatever way he wanted. "What if I got you pregnant, up here right now baby? That would make the night even more beautiful."

The way your walls clenched on him only egged him on more, "Shit—you want that, don't you? I wasn't planning on pulling out, anyway." He whispered against your ear, his hot breath causing your pussy to leak around his cock, so much so trying to flood him out of your gushing hole. Biting his lip with a deep grunt, Naoya pulled you off the window and against his chest completely, "You really want me to get you pregnant, huh, ____?"

He wrapped his strong muscular arms around your body, his left hand gripping your chin and turning your head so that he could capture your lips in a heated kiss, his eyes sealed shut just as yours were to embrace the impact of this intimate moment. His balls slapped softly and gently against your clit, your juices soaking him in a delicious sheen of your juices. "I love you so much, ____." He desperately pleaded, letting his hips roll into yours in the most intimate way that had you pretty much drooling.

"Come on baby." He smiled against the side of your face, his hands sliding down your body and going to your thighs to harshly pull you against his hips and help you piston his cock faster and harder inside you. "I feel your little pussy clenching on me so tightly." With a deep moan, Naoya placed fingers against your clit to harshly draw deep circles on your wet nub. "Cum on my cock so I can get you fucking pregnant."

Nanami - Being in a five star classy hotel was the best way you could've thought of spending your honeymoon with your newlywed husband, Kento Nanami. The two of you were cuddling on the bed you shared, laughter filled the room as you watched a movie that was categorized as comedy. Everything at this moment was perfect, your husband holding your hand with your wedding band, occasionally playing with the rock inside it.

This moment was so special for you two, all this effort you two put into loving one another finally turning into a successful accomplishment. Not that anything else wasn't an accomplishment, but this was the best feeling either of you could've asked for. Nanami was in heaven, which is why he wrapped an arm around your shoulder, before placing a kiss to the side of your forehead.

"I love you so much, ____." Nanami confessed, even though he reminded you of this every single day, and every single chance he got to say this. Even with those three words and you hearing them occasionally, you adored them every single time, because he knew that you loved the reassurance. And that he loved you with every fiber in his body, he couldn't keep his emotions to himself now that you're both married and together forever.

"You don't understand how much I love you more, Kento. More than you ever could imagine." You whispered back, your soft words sending a jolt of lightening to his heart. He couldn't help how much he loved you, you were literally the best woman a man could ever ask for. His main life goal was to literally grow old with you, going through life together no matter how hard it is.

His hands wrapped around your hips, pulling you on top of him to straddle his muscular thighs. You could feel him, and judging by that look on his face, you could tell he wanted to completely forget this movie and just ravage you. But you loved how he asked when engaging these kind of moments. "Can we—indulge in each other a little more than this, ____? Only if you want to."

Nsfw —

Slowly but surely, you rode Nanami's cock so heavenly it had his eyes closed and his mouth halfway agape. Nanami had his hands stationed on your thighs, letting you ride him at your own pace, getting your own rhythm and letting you take whatever your body desired. All he could do was moan your name, the deep rumbles of his chest making your walls suction strongly on his cock.

Given his size, Nanami never minded being patient with you, he let you take control only when if you asked otherwise. "Kento—you feel sooo... sooo good, babe." The way your arms wrapped around his neck and hugged his torso caused your body to lift up on him more, shifting your hips in an angle that made his cock curve and deliciously slide across the silky surface of your tight walls. He loved moments like this, only with you.

"I love you, baby." His voice choked out. Your body was so beautiful, he loved how it felt when you pushed yourself all the way down on his thick cock. The way your body jiggled added more sensation to his body, the dopamine boost to his brain boiling sweat across his body, his thick organ leaking pre-cum and adding a tingly sweet feeling to his abdomen. He could feel himself about to burst, "____, I'm about to—"

"Please Kento—just—cum inside please, I'm cumming." Your voice broke in a way that had Nanami's sack tightening in a way its never done before. He wrapped his arms around you, grounding you against his cock to thrust up into you, assisting your body to rush the delicious taste that you both could feel on the tip of your tongue's. Your orgasms were right there, the feeling approaching faster than it ever had before. "Baby—!" You practically screamed out.

Nanami couldn't help himself, holding you against him as he lifted you with one arm and pushed you onto your back, keeping up the momentum and continuing the onslaught of his thick cock inside your sopping wet pussy. He concealed you and his moans with his delicate lips, letting his dick stir your insides in the way that instantly made you clamp down on him, your pussy making his body stutter and splatter a thick load of cum inside of you, painting your insides white like a beautiful canvas. He kept his hips moving, however, the overstimulation making your eyes water and your hands shoot up to push at his chest. "We have to keep going baby, I need you to know I love you so much."

Gojo - It was the second day of your honeymoon with your husband, Satoru Gojo, and here you were trying your hardest to get comfortable in the heat of this spa bath. How your husband was able to rent the entire spa place to yourselves for a day, you had not even the slightest clue. You were currently sitting in the water, trying your hardest to accommodate to the hot sensation of the water, but it just wasn't working.

Trying to imagine the water being cold, that didn't work, trying to imagine yourself at home in your bath tub where the temperature was just right, and bubbles popped around your body but nothing worked. Gojo told you that he just wanted to have a relaxing day with you but if you're being honest, you've never been to a spa a single day in your life. So this is all new to you, you didn't know how people could get comfortable in the heat of this water.

You were standing halfway out of the water, only half of your body in the water with your hands covering your chest. It was just so hard to get comfortable to the point where you could sit back and relax, but apparently your husband loved spas. And hearing the deep chuckle from behind you, you could also tell that he was enjoying the view of your body sticking out of the water.

"I must say, your ass looks good as hell from this angle, baby. Mind if I join you?" You didn't even have to say anything because he was already dropping his towel and for you, he always removed his blindfold, placing them both to the side. Stepping into the water without a second of hesitation, your husband sat on the edge of the water, his arms propped up on the edge as his legs spread open wide, a spot that was only reserved for you. "Come here, babe."

"Babe, how the hell am I supposed to get comfortable in this water? I mean, it's not like my bath at home."

Without hesitation, your husband grabbed you and pulled you into his lap, his arms secured tightly underneath your breast, his head on your shoulder with a small smile. "You'll get used to it, ____, I promise it's not too bad depending on how long you stay in. And if you want—" Your husband chuckled, "I know a sure fire way to make you more comfortable."

Nsfw —

Water splashed alongside the spa bath, Gojo holding your legs against his chest with one hand and his other hand having a tight grip around your throat. He loved the way your throat bobbed up and down desperately trying to get air from how tight his hood was around your neck. He let his cock slowly sink deeply into your heat, though, the impact of his hips caused your body to move harshly back and forth against the spa edge.

He looked so angelic fucking into you, his crystal blue eyes piercing daggers into your face. He loved staring at your face, watching how your facial expressions morphed into different one's with each thrust he shook through your body. "I'm so glad I rented this place just for the two of us—fuck, you look so good." His hold on your throat tightened, the rosey tint that appeared on his being one of the signs that your pussy was gripping him just right.

You loved hearing your husband moan from the tightness of your walls, and it was pretty hard to tell your soaking juices from the actual water. "Your pussy is warmer than this water babe, fuck—you don't know how much I love you." With your legs still on his shoulders, Gojo decided to fold you completely in half with his body weight, his long cock thrusting languidly into your wet walls, his hands holding your wrists flat against the surface of the spa. "You know babe, I don't think you've ever been tighter for me."

Your head lolled back against the edge of the spa bath, Gojo taking the initiative to suckle deeply onto your throat. "Satoru—everything feels so... fuck—! I love you!" That only edged him on to continue his administration's on your pussy, the slow methodical thrusting of his hips touching every sensitive spot inside your velvet walls. "Please do it this time, babe!" And that stopped him, the white haired male sitting up to look upon your face. Trying to see if you were serious or not.

"Are you serious, babe? You want it now?" Your desperate whining moan was all he needed to reel his hips back and continue his onslaught, his mouth engulfing yours to swivel his tongue around with yours. If you thought this was the right time for it, then Gojo definitely didn't mind trying. He's never done this before, but he was ready to see how it felt. "If you think now is the right time to get you pregnant, let's put a baby in you."

This work was originally written by @compressingsins , if you see anything similar, please report it to me. 🫶🏾

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daycourtofficial · 10 months ago

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Falling in Love on the Fourth Floor - Part 3

Summary: Out of an act of desperation, you move in with a guy you kind of know who happens to have a really hot brother who lives next door.

(Part 1) (Part 2)(Part 4)

Author’s note: I’m a bit uncertain about this part tbh :/ on one hand I love it, on the other I’m not sure

It had been a few days since Azriel went with you to return the truck, and you hadn’t seen much of him or Cassian since. Cassian had told you they were both personal trainers at the same gym, and he even went so far as to put his schedule up on the fridge so you would know when he’d be gone.

Looking at the schedule, he had even left a sticky note telling you he had plans before work and that he wouldn’t be back all day.

Your day alone in the apartment didn’t go as well as you had hoped it would, your phone buzzing around noon, the name Dad lighting up your phone.

You sigh, letting it go to voicemail, and decide to call Feyre to avoid thinking about him. She picks up on the third ring, her voice chirping through the phone, “hello?”

“Hey Fey, do you wanna do something today? I don’t want to wallow all alone.”

She sighs over the phone, “I wish I could, but I’m walking into work right now. I can’t call out when they can see me walking in the doors.”

You sigh, “do you know if Mor’s free?”

You can hear some commotion from Feyre’s surroundings, like she’s walking into a building.

“Mor has that internship she just started, I think she’s busy getting things ready for that.”

A beat pauses before Feyre continues, “I gotta go, but I’ll call you when I get off, okay? We can do something tomorrow if you’re free.”

You smile, “can we go to that axe throwing place we’ve been talking about for ages?”

She laughs, “absolutely. I’ll even print out a photo of your dad and hang it up on the target. Okay, I really gotta go, but if you wanna text me you can. I’ll respond when I can. Love you!”

She waits for you to echo her sentiment before hanging up, leaving you alone again. You spend the day trying to distract yourself, finding anything you can to distance yourself from the loneliness you feel. You unpack a few boxes you hadn’t gotten to, and after being fully moved in, you pour yourself a glass of soda to commemorate the occasion.

You sip from your glass as you begin cleaning the apartment, organizing the pantry, cleaning out the fridge, hell you even strip Cassian’s bed and clean his sheets and comforter.

Once the place is clean, you run out to the store, picking up what you need to make your favorite meal. You unpack your groceries when you come back, pour yourself a glass of wine, and sigh in contentment at spending an evening alone cooking your favorite pasta dish. You are determined to salvage some part of today, even if it’s just with a nice dinner. You’re playing music from your phone, the sounds drowning out the notification of a voicemail from your father that you’ve been ignoring all day.

You sip your wine as you stir the pasta, however the blaring sound of an ad startles you, causing wine to go all over the front of your clothes. You sigh, looking to the ceiling for strength to not break down. You take some deep breaths before peeling off your wine soaked dress, opening the laundry door to throw it into the washing machine. You’re hopeful that getting it in immediately will help prevent a stain from setting in, but you still pour a little extra stain remover in.

Once you get the machine going, standing in your kitchen in your underwear, you decide to make the most of this. The day sucked. All day all you had wanted to do was hide under your covers, hide from the world. You took a deep breath and told yourself “I’m done hiding.”

Your favorite song starts playing, and knowing that Cassian won’t be home for several more hours, you dance. You jump around your apartment, whipping your head around, letting out the loose bun your hair was in for the day.

You skip around, the sounds of Super Trouper by ABBA drowning out the door opening until suddenly something stops your music. Turning around you find Rhys’s hand hovering over your phone, having just stopped the music, and Azriel, whose gaze is on you, soaking in every detail of your little show.

You blink a few times, trying to ensure this is not a nightmare, however you don’t snap back to reality until the timer goes off for the pasta. All three of you whip your heads towards the timer, it’s tone jarring all three of you back to the present.

You groan, starting to back away back to your room. “What are you guys doing here?” You exclaim, “but more importantly - please drain my pasta while I find pants.”

You slip into your room, finding a comfy pair of sweats and a crop top, coming back out to find Azriel draining your pasta into the colander.

“Well?” You ask, cutting up the chicken you had pan-fried earlier. Azriel won’t look you in the eye, a blush evident across his face as he’s turned in the opposite direction, facing away from you.

Rhysand doesn’t have the same affliction.

He smirks at you, “is this how Cassian gets greeted when he comes home? I must say I’d be more chipper coming home to that little show than to Azriel.”

Azriel does not respond to the jab. Instead, he picks up another knife, helping you cut. Rhys just stands behind you two, leaning against the fridge.

“Cassian most certainly does not get greeted by my bare ass when he comes home,” you respond indignantly. The two of you have finished chopping, so you motion for all the chicken and the pasta to go into the pan with the pesto sauce concoction you’ve made. Azriel helps you stir it, and once it’s evenly distributed, you two pop it into the oven.

“Well your ass wasn’t bare, it was slightly covered by your very cute-“

The task at hand done and a new timer set, you turn to face Rhys, cutting him off. “I spilled wine on my clothes and I didn’t want it to set and then I got carried away when Abba came on.”

He only smiles back, “got a hot date for dinner tonight?”

Azriel tenses ever so slightly, but you don’t think too much of it as you respond, “yeah word on the street is she has an incredible rack and a great ass.”

“Having seen them first hand I think the rumors are true.”

You roll your eyes, but decide you’re done with this game and want some sincerity.

“I had a shitty day and I just wanted my favorite meal.” You look down, crossing your arms. You don’t like being vulnerable, especially around people you just met. You think about Cassian, and how much he loves the two guys in front of you. Maybe you can take a leap, and perhaps they’ll catch you.

“I’d actually enjoy the company if you guys want to stay. I made plenty of pasta to wallow in so I think there’s enough to go around.”

Your eyes stay on the ground as you move your hands up and down your arms, a nervous movement. You watch as Azriel’s foot comes into view, standing in front of you as he gently taps his foot against yours, a silent request to look at him. “I love pasta,” he tells you, looking into your eyes. You’re struck by the absence of pity in them, and how they are full of sincerity, of kindness.

You look away from him when Rhys starts talking, “It’s decided. You got a two for one deal tonight - two hot dates for the evening.”

You smile, the thought of being alone almost overbearing, when you remember, “why did you guys come over here anyway?”

Azriel sheepishly looks away, clearly thinking about how they caught you half naked when they walked in the door. Rhys tells you, “we wanted to watch Forest Gump and we knew Cassian had it on Blu-ray.”

You nod, looking over at Cassian’s wall of dvds and blu-rays, which you had to admit was quite impressive. “I’ve never seen it - is it any good?”

When Cassian got off work from the gym, he thought he’d come home to a dark apartment, scrounging the fridge for any remnants of food. What he didn’t expect to find was his two brothers watching Forrest Gump, and seeing a tupperware container in the fridge with a sticky note with his name on it in Azriel’s neat script.

He walks in, Azriel shooting daggers at him. The audacity, Cassian thinks, watching a movie in my place and being annoyed that I’m here. That is until he comes close enough to notice your head in Azriel’s lap, a hand curled up on his thigh. His eyes linger on his brother’s hand that is slowly massaging your scalp, the hands he had always been so nervous and protective over. Cassian realizes he’s never seen his brother leave his hands to be so openly observed outside of his brothers.

He stares for a minute as your blanketed back slowly rises and falls, clearly asleep, before he turns, giving his brother a shit eating grin where they have a conversation without words. The conversation essentially boils down to Cassian’s eyebrows raising up and down, and Azriel’s continued scowl at Cassian’s inability to move through a room without making as much noise as possible.

Azriel doesn’t relax until Cassian is sitting on the other couch next to Rhys, tuning into the movie when Forrest is walking around Washington D.C.

“She didn’t even make it halfway through the movie,” Cassian whispers to Rhys.

“No,” Rhys replies, looking at you curled up on the couch, a soft smile on his face, “but she did ask us to stay for dinner.”

#acotar fanfiction #azriel #azriel x reader #azriel x you #azriel fanfic #azriel fluff #acotar writing #azriel x y/n

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worldwinebottles · 4 months ago

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charnelhouse · 2 years ago

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press the gas and ride

gif by @riley-keoughs pairing: Joel Miller x f!Reader (nicknamed Dolly) word count: 2.4k+ summary: comfort in a car warnings: hurt/comfort. smut. angst. A/N: this takes place a month after teacups, but no need to read. tlou ep 3 spoilers. this is really just trash smut. Joel Miller Masterlist

She watched Joel's expression buckle as he read the letter. His brow furrowed, the muscle in his jaw tensing. She looked away, suddenly feeling intrusive. She'd never come here with Joel. His trips to Bill were semi-frequent, but this was the first time he’d brought her. Of course, he hadn't expected this. He hadn't thought they'd be walking into a dead house.

The fresh air through the open front door bullied the stench of rotten meat and vegetables. The dinner on the table buzzed with flies. There were starched, ironed napkins folded in triangles with lovely patterns of woodland creatures. She traced the tiny squirrel sewed into the fabric before studying the label on the wine bottle. She was intent on busying herself. She wanted to give Joel space, but he'd been more paranoid than usual since the attack a month ago.

I don't want you out of my sight.

She hadn't stopped aching. Brutal. Horrible. She'd slaughtered two people, and her mind continued to spin with the memories of it. She was unable to remove the taste of blood from her tongue. She could not unhear the shuddering death rattle or unfeel the way the man beneath her had wriggled and then spasmed like an electrocuted rodent.

Joel had also seemingly lost his cool that night. After he'd tucked her into bed, she'd heard him smashing up the first floor. In the morning, he'd refused to let her see what he had done and when she fell apart again (in the safety of their QZ apartment), Joel wouldn't have it.

He'd crouched so they could be eye-level, large hand cupping the back of her skull. "They got what they deserved. Nothin' more than that."

He was right, but teaching her head to stop was easier said than done.

She scanned the dining room before settling on the mahogany cabinet full of delicate china. When she noticed the powder blue and white teacups, she winced. She couldn't escape it. Everything triggered her. She needed to learn to grow up and out of her pain because it wouldn't serve her and certainly not Joel. He bulldozed through everything, and she had to follow suit.

Joel cleared his throat. He had stopped reading and was staring out the window, far away. She intended to bring him back to shore.

"They have a car?" she asked, and Joel's eyes swept toward her. Inscrutable.

"Yeah." He scraped a hand over his mouth. "Yeah."

***

Joel guided her to a guest room, instructing her to clean up and be ready in an hour.

He'd found her a box of women's clothes that she happily dug through. The very idea of new outfits felt celebratory- even if they smelled a bit stale.

The musty fabric reminded her of her grandmother's closets. She'd used to hide behind the wool coats and leather shoes, toes snug in the sea-green carpet. She'd get light-headed on mothballs.

Her family was gone. A long time gone.

She supposed Joel was the only person who really gave a shit about her well-being. If she died, he’d have the memory of her, at least. She wouldn’t be dust.

After she showered, she yanked on a sundress and sneakers. Joel would undoubtedly say something, but she was past caring. She stared at herself in the mirror, petting the floral-print bodice. She twisted side to side, the breeze from the open window licking between her legs and under her arms.

She thought of Bill and Frank in the next room and abruptly stopped. Morbid. Strange to be so fine rummaging through a house when two dead men were feet away. Their window was open, too, and she wondered if the sweet brush of cool air had cradled them into the next life. She stepped forward, pressing her ear against the wood. She listened, tapping her fingertips over the wallpaper.

Silence. She tapped again. Waiting.

"What are you doing?"

She whirled around to find Joel standing in the doorway with a towel around his waist. He'd combed his wet hair back, but a single strand boyishly drifted over his forehead. The scars across his torso gleamed white under the naked afternoon sun.

"Nothing." She shifted her weight, the dress swishing with her.

He frowned as he scrutinized her outfit. "You can't wear that."

"Because?"

"Because you can't do shit in a dress that short," he replied flatly.

She put her hands on her hips. "Can I just wear this today? It's-fuck-it's the prettiest thing I've worn since-since I don't know." She averted her eyes, feeling childish at her reasoning.

Because I want to be beautiful for once. I want to look beautiful for you and not covered in grime, blood, and jeans, two sizes too big.

The expression on Joel's face flickered between irritated and puzzled. She thought he might stride across the room and tear it off her.

Once in a while, he'd give her shit about things like this-pecking at her for enjoying luxuries that didn't exist anymore. He'd call her a spoiled brat when he really wanted to tick her off. Instinctively, she knew he was doing it, so she'd snap at him, deal him back with a rough hand.

He always won and she assumed he’d win here, as well.

She expected him to say no, but he took a breath instead. Running his hand across his chest, he massaged an old bullet wound hidden in the sparse hair before turning back into the hall. White flag.

Then, his voice pitched so low it grazed the floor. "Fine."

***

The letter must have softened him. Repeatedly punched him until he was a tender, pliant piece of meat. He hadn't even twitched when she snatched two guns too massive for her off the basement wall or smuggled a box of wine into the car.

His hands scraped over the steering wheel when he slid into the front seat. He stared blankly at the dash and then the manicured driveway. The grass was just beginning to creep away from the lawn, encroaching onto the asphalt.

She wasn't sure how to deal with this. He usually seemed to take death in stride. His grief was like a chalky, oversized pill, but he swallowed it nonetheless. He'd made it clear that he didn't even like Bill yet...

"I'm sorry," she offered.

"Take your feet off the dash," he ordered stiffly.

She scowled but did as she was told, figuring she didn't need to push Joel Miller’s buttons again today. She settled into her seat, hands prim in her lap as she waited for him to begin driving.

He didn't.

He continued to sit silently, seemingly unable to turn the car on. The hand around the steering wheel tightened, his scabbed knuckles flexing and paling beneath the windshield. His nostrils flared, and she suddenly knew:

He was going to crack. He was going to burst down the middle, and he needed her.

Abruptly, she crawled over the console, gripping him by the lapels of his button-up to balance her weight. The fresh clothes looked good on him-the plaid green shirt fit his broad frame like a glove. She nearly toppled into the door before he grasped her wrist roughly. “What are you-"

"Shh," she murmured, straddling his lap. He stared at her.

Joel wore his grief in the creases of his face. His pain. His anger. He was beautiful to her. Sexy in a way that couldn't be understood. Older, too. Older than any man she'd ever had before, but it wasn't like she'd had that many men, to begin with.

"I'm here," she whispered, her thighs squeezing around his own. His mouth parted, exhaling.

She wondered what undercurrents ran beneath his skin-his armor. What did he think about? How did he see her?

She lifted herself onto her knees, and Joel's hands automatically seized her hips. Unbuttoning his jeans, she tugged the zipper down, and his eyes found hers. Good. Coyly, she licked her palm before gripping his half-hard cock. She stroked him slow, glancing down to watch the blush-red head disappear in the circle of her fist. He shuddered, hips lifting a few inches off the leather seat.

She intended to be fast about this. Pleasurable consolation was a language she knew Joel understood.

“I’m going to fuck you,” she said and he shivered under her touch. He remained silent as the grave though his eyes never left hers. Perhaps, he was struck dumb by her forwardness.

She clutched his shoulder as she braced herself before sinking down and guiding him into the heat of her cunt. She'd worn the sun dress for a reason.

Joel made a gritty, strangled noise as she took him to the hilt, lowering herself until his thighs were flush with her ass. The band of his jeans grazed her skin, the metal of the zipper catching flesh. His nostrils flared as she tightened, walls spasming because he was always a little too big.

Wordlessly, she wrapped her arms around his shoulders, forcing his face against her chest. He sighed deeply as she rocked forward, his fingers biting into her waist. It could hardly be called a fuck, just her grinding down and him pushing his cock upward until he couldn't claim another centimeter.

She cradled the back of his skull, rooting her nose around his damp hair that smelled like clover and a scent she recalled from before - something generic and artificial like Irish Spring.

Finding leverage was proving difficult, but she did her best. She rose up, keeping him halfway inside her before sliding down. Repeat. In her defense, she’d never fucked anyone in a car before.

One of her hands snuck out the open window to grasp the top of the car. It was dusty, and she had this ridiculous worry that maybe someone would crawl into the garage and bite her hand. She ripped it back to cup the side of Joel's face instead. His mouth twitched, his lids heavy like he was drunk and dazed. He didn't even care she had smeared old car dust into his beard. He'd have to shower again. She would, too, and she wanted to laugh at the strange coincidence of paving new roads in their relationship through hot showers. After all, he'd wrenched her away from a panic attack in that house outside Boston. He'd held her in the shower, mouth brushing her ear.

"You did a hell of a job."

"You did so fuckin' well, sweetheart."

She swelled from the memory of Joel's praise. She wanted to pay him back.

"I've got you," she murmured against his temple, nails tracing a line across his scalp through his thick damp grays. "I've got you, Joel."

He nodded-or she thought he did. His gestures were always so vague. Sometimes he'd hold her down and fuck her brains out while telling her how much he wanted to kill her for being stupid and acting recklessly. It would then always end with him possessively clutching her body to his.

You send mixed signals, Joel.

What?

You said you wanted to kill me, and now you won't let me go.

I never said that.

She felt him twitch inside her, his mouth dragging across her clavicle before he abruptly shoved the top of her dress down and latched to her nipple. He sucked it, tongue darting over the nub and causing her pussy to clench around his length.

"Sweetheart," he mumbled.

"I know," she said.

Their grief sat between them - a weight strung about their ankles, dragging them down to the deepest parts of whatever was left. She knew blips of his pain as he knew hers. He comforted her in the ways he understood, not necessarily with words but with actions. She could do that for him now, remind him that he had her.

She rolled her hips, and he groaned, his breath puffing against her sternum. She snagged him tighter and dug her grip into his skin like she was holding fast to a rock in a riptide. The car was so small, the steering wheel bumping against her lower back, and you could hear everything.

The rustle of fabric. The squelch of her sex and slap of skin.

Finally, Joel planted his feet and began to drive up into her. Short, fast strokes that hit just right. It almost hurt. It gave her a belly ache, but everything else fell away. The car filled with his low, subdued grunts and her whimpers.

He secured his arms around her waist, one hand sneaking to the base of her scalp to embed his thumb into the muscle beneath her ear. They were tangled in such a way that it would have looked like anything - they could be devouring each other, feasting on the other's throats as they fucked fast and sad.

Somewhere along the way, Joel tilted his head and demanded her mouth.

He kissed her fiercely, tongue hot and aggressive as it wrestled with hers. Exploring. "Baby," he sighed against her slippery teeth. "Fuck."

Joel, her man of few words, but just the right ones. She still didn't call him anything but his name. Nothing else fit him.

"Shit," she gasped as he delivered a harsh thrust. Stay with me. Stay focused.

Her climax paraded around her belly, kicking up dirt and shouting out toward a faceless crowd. It was turning in circles, unable to find the finish line. He was screwing her tectonic plate deep, but the friction wasn't enough for her to get off. It didn't matter. This was about him. Not her.

He gripped her hip and shoved her down before spearing up, grinding in slow, determined circles. He left her mouth to find her throat, sucking methodically at her pulse.

It didn't take too long after that. He grumbled something into her jaw (maybe, Dolly) before his hips stuttered beneath her. She felt him fill her, warmth blooming outward. She'd have to deal with that, but for now, she worshiped him. He lifted his face, flushed from exertion - golden, bright, and devastating as his dark eyes searched hers.

“You’re good,” she praised, pressing her lips to his chin.

When she crawled off his lap, she was sticky between her legs. He huffed, tugging at the edge of her dress as if trying to hide her modesty.

No one's around here, Joel.

No one. It's you, and it's me. It's us.

She was sore as fuck, like she'd been smacked in the crotch. Her orgasm was lost somewhere, hanging by a few threads, but she didn't want it. Instead, she craved the longing-the lingering frustration of her missed pleasure. She brushed her hair out of her face and smoothed her dress.

"That was-"

She was hauled back over to him. Their brows bumped, noses jamming together before Joel kissed her hard. When he finally pulled away, he asked, "You feel safe with me?"

"What kind of question-

"You feel safe with me?" he urged, hands seizing her cheeks. She wondered if it had something to do with what had happened at that house a month ago. The teacup house. Or was this because of what had been written in that letter beyond Bill and Frank's goodbyes?

She felt that if she probed, he would splinter. It wasn't her business. She told him the truth.

Smiling, she placed her hand over his. "Yes," she assured him. "I always feel safe with you."

Joel took a breath, nodding once, before pulling away. He stabbed the keys into the ignition, twisting them north, and the car rumbled to life.

When they left the garage, she watched the walls creep over him again.

#joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x you #joel miller imagine #tlou fanfiction #tlou #joel tlou #joel the last of us #pedro pascal #pedro pascal fanfiction

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mazikeenhyde · 3 months ago

Text

Less than a Minute - Part 4 - Final

WARNING – 18+ ONLY – MINORS DNI

PLEASE UNDERSTAND THIS FANFICTION HEAVILY COMMENTS ON DEPRESSION & SUICIDE. This is your warning if you are easily triggered!

A Poly!Judgment-Day fanfiction containing themes and mentions of DEPRESSION, SUICIDAL THOUGHTS, LONLINESS, PANIC ATTACKS, SMUT (GIRL-ON-GIRL), ANGST, SADNESS, ALCOHOL, HOSPITALS etc

READER X JUDGMENT DAY – POLY – Rhea, Damien, Finn, Dominik x READER- Written mainly in first person view (Reader Female)

Italic font – flashback, speech or memories

Word Count -4,167 +

Less than a minute – Part 4

04:40am – December 26th, 2023

“Fucking birds…” I muttered to myself as I dragged my feet to the bathroom. I had never been a morning person; I had never been one to leap out of bed at the crack of dawn and seize the day! And I certainly wasn’t the one who suggested we take a family trip out to the middle of nowhere to spend Christmas in the countryside where there were quite literally hundreds, no scratch that bloody thousands of God damn fucking birds singing in every bush, shrub and tree for miles. Not to mention that stupid fucking rooster from the local village farm that thought now was a great time to warm up its voice, clearly preparing itself for a debut at the local karaoke chicken barn.

“Stupid fucking birds cocka-doodl-fucking-dooing at stupid fucking four am in the fucking morning” I ranted quietly as I ran my toothbrush under the sink and started brushing my teeth. I could see my reflection in the mirror, what a sight! My hair looked like someone had dragged me backwards through a hedge to have their way with me, to be fair, that remark wasn’t too far from the truth. I dare not go downstairs for the fear of seeing the mess that needed cleaning up. Between the five of us we had polished off 4 bottles of champagne, half a bottle of vodka, two bottles of red wine and I don’t think I want to recount just how many tequila bombs Finn had magically made appear. And in turn we had all made disappear. Top the night off with a very…. messy? Group jacuzzi dip and hey presto, A hangover from Hell.

I could feel my head lightly spinning as I closed my eyes holding onto the wall for support whilst continuing to clean my teeth. I had become a pro at composing myself the morning after the night before, I knew the drill and how to stop it from getting any worse.

Brush Teeth

Pint of water

Pain killers

Close the door and avoid all human interaction for the foreseeable future

Swear to never drink again

Remind yourself these rules are a load of bollocks, and you never learn.

Christmas day had been incredible and the matching fleecy pyjamas we had all gone to bed in were the cherry on top. I mean they didn’t fully stay on for long… but it was the thought from Dominik that counted. Rhea and I in little candy cane vest top and shorts and the boys each with long legged fleecy trousers and t-shirts also printed with little candy canes. Too sweet for words and apparently far too irresistible to tear off each other.

I peeked my head out the bathroom window and smirked at the sight. Some abandoned pyjama pieces both inside and out the jacuzzi were all that remained out there of a very memorable, but fuzzy night. It was still dark out, but the sun had begun to make an appearance, so a very soft warming glow was ever so slightly lighting the horizon. The countryside really was beautiful in the winter, frosted windowpanes and a festive chill in the air really made it feel like Christmas… Well boxing day now.

As I continued to clean my teeth, I looked back at myself in the mirror pulling my hair into a messy bun.

There it was.

I could see it there… for a moment.

That pain hiding in my eyes.

I could see it.

I could feel it.

I had been running from it for some time now and I had hoped if I just pushed myself, if I focused and didn’t think about it, maybe it would go away. How naive I was to think life was ever that kind. Why was this happening, everything is good, everything was okay. I’m surrounded by love, by compassion, by happiness. This can’t be happening. But it was, it was happening.

The world around me began to fall, the room echoed away, and the bells began to ring. As if nothing existed around but me… and the fear.

I held the sink tightly, balancing the toothbrush between my teeth. “No…No…Come on... Come on” I whispered, gripping the basin tighter and taking a sharp short breath. I could feel my heart beating out of my chest, the pace ever growing and the room around closing in. Why was this happening. Why?!

I held back the tears that were threatening their escape and turned the cold tap on, spitting out the toothbrush and flushing my face with the water in attempt to ground myself.

Quickly turning I closed and locked the bathroom door behind me and ever so silently I slid myself down the door frame till I collapsed into a hunched ball on the cold tiled floor.

For an hour I sat there. Alone. In silence. I didn’t say a word. I didn’t move a muscle. I barley even blinked. I didn’t shed a single tear. As if I had dissociated from all reality, I felt as if I didn’t even exist. Did I want to exist?

------------------------------------------------------

As quickly as it came, it went. Standing to my feet I quietly unlocked the bathroom door and crept back into the bedroom. Sprawled out across a rather incredibly large king size bed lay a bundle of entangled limbs. Finn lay with one arm hanging off the bed and a Santa hat pushed back across his hair. Dominik’s head tucked up under his arm with one leg wrapped over Rhea’s waist and the other above the duvet. Hidden underneath the mullet was the dark locks of a miss Rhea Ripley whose black lipstick had been smudged down the side of her cheek. Smirking to myself I remembered having her face buried between my thighs under the Christmas tree while the boys played beer pong in the kitchen, unbeknown to them that us girls were sharing a little late ‘Christmas’ gift.

“Quickly!” Rhea said softly under her breath as she laughed taking my hand and sneaking away from the kitchen where Damien, Dominik and Finn had set up the dining table in order to begin a beer pong tournament. Slightly spilling our drinks in the hallway, we snuck our way into the opposing front room and closed the door behind us. The little cottage we had rented was a truly beautiful masterpiece, it stood in a huge field with no nearby neighbours. Exactly the kind of place you would want to escape to when you and your partners live life in the eye of the ever-nosey public view.

Rhea took my champagne glass from me and set it down with hers as well on the wooden unit before turning to face me. An ever so cheeky smile she grinned, showing off that enticing black lipstick and long lashes that had never failed to pull me into her grasp.

Running her right hand through my hair she raised her left hand and reached over trailing her fingers up my bare thighs, I shivered to her touch. Her grip tightened as she took a fistful of my hair and pinned me against the wall opposite a rather stupidly positioned Christmas tree. My breathe hitched in my throat as her lips positioned themselves mere millimetres from the dark red lipstick across mine.

“Hola Bunny….” Rhea spoke oh so softly, leaning across my chest and into my ear as she released her grip in my hair whilst moving my hands to position them above my head.

“Don’t. Move.” She stated and slowly she crouched down removing my shorts before throwing one of my legs over her shoulder and pulled my red laced panties to the side with her other free hand.

“Feliz Navidad” She smirked, winking up at me before rolling the cold stud in her tongue through the folds between my legs and planting a soft gentle kiss on my clit.

“Fuckkkk.” I whimpered, desperately trying to keep my hands above my head as her tounge moved back, ever increasing her speed as she caressed my sensitive bud between her teeth. Moving my leg slightly higher on her shoulder she slid two fingers inside of me and began to pump as her lipstick smeared its way across my wet pussy lips and I felt my legs shiver. Harder. Faster. With no mercy. Rhea was rough, her nails dug into my pale skin and her persistent tounge dug ever deeper, hunting down the orgasm she so desperately wanted across her face. A knot began building inside my stomach as the muscles in my thighs tightened and I shifted my weight onto her before gripping onto the first thing I could reach.

“Fuckk, Fuckk, Rhea... oh godd” I pleaded as my entire body tensed and a part of me panicked at the idea of losing this feeling if I couldn’t find my balance.

Pinning me against the wall with her hands, her face, her entire body weight even she gripped my one lose arm that had fallen from above my head to lock me in position whilst my other free arm had latched itself onto the Christmas tree for dear life, now no longer standing straight in its metal stand. The lights on it flickered on and off as we both shook, unable to hold our positions still.

Rhea pounded into my aching pussy with her fingers as her tounge stud bullied against me, I could feel the sweat begin to drip down my neck and into my cleavage as I panted, and my heart threatened to break from my chest. Rhea gripped my body so tightly tipping me over the edge and the orgasm she had worked so hard for spilled out across her face, ruining what was left of that perfectly placed lipstick liner.

The boys wouldn’t have actually ever known what we were up to if I hadn’t forgotten I wasn’t exactly standing with two feet on the ground. Instead relaxing for a moment, Rhea shifted her weight off me, and I went to move but ended up toppling the Christmas tree over on top of us.

A loud crash echoed through the cottage, along with the familiar sound of smashing baubles (a sound that came with a reminder from when we had once trusted Dom to unwrap the Christmas decorations, I reckon 8/10 of them he had either dropped, stood on, misplaced or knocked off the tree completely) and the fairy lights short circuiting from the plug coming out the wall.

The door flew open and in ran Finn and Dom who didn’t look half as shocked as Damien looked gutted to have missed out.

“Are you okay?!” Finn and Dom said in Unison.

“Where was my invite!?” Damien demanded looking down on a half undressed and slightly exposed me whilst Rhea ran her hand around her lips enjoying what was left from the actions from before and smirking towards the boys before winking at me.

----------------------------

Damien laid face down into the bed on his chest with his entire body laying ontop of the duvet, I wondered if he had passed out like that or if he just liked showing off his bright green and red stripped ‘Mr Grinch’ pants. Either way, that was one fine ass. The devil on my shoulders first word of thought was to bite down it, mark my territory you could say. But the ever-increasing hangover told me otherwise and the opposing angel buried that idea quickly. Had Damien put me across his knee for misbehaving I wasn’t entirely sure all the alcohol was going to stay down with the impact. Ever tempting as it may have been.

Instead seizing my opportunity, I gently tip toed over to the bedside and climbed over to position myself between Damien and Rhea. Snuggling myself under the duvet and into his embrace he was quick to join me and turn over taking in a deep inhale of my hair, kissing my head and quickly falling back asleep.

I wished we could have paused the clock there. Time could have stood still, and I could have never felt safer than in the arms of the four people who made my heart feel so full. Can’t have it all though can you, secretly I knew that. I knew that this was just the beginning of my downfall. I never would have known how bad it could have gotten.

Who knew when you hit rock bottom, there’s a basement that follows.

The sounds of the hospital filled every inch of the waiting room, the persistent beeps and alarms ringing from every was enough to drive anyone mad.

“For god sake, he was bought in by an ambulance no more than 20 minuite ago?! How can you not know where he is, that’s your job isn’t it!?” Finn slammed his fists down on the enquiry desk as an old miserable nurse stood staring at him.

“As I told your… “ the matron cleared her throat “Partner, we don’t have anyone here under the name Master Dominik Mysterio?”

“Christ, Gutierrez! Not Mysterio… idiota!” Priest shook his head before turning back to a recognisable figure walking towards them from the hallway.

“DOM!” Priest shouted as he grabbed Finn by the shoulder and they both rushed over as Damien grabbed the boy and pulling him into a tight embrace.

“Ow…” Dom whimpered as Finn lept into the hug.

“What the hell happened love!?” Finn pulled back grabbing Dom’s face, checking him over for any sign of injury or illness.

Dom shook his head and shrugged his shoulders, “I uhh, I” but he was interrupted by a doctor that was walking up behind him.

“Panic attack, as I was trying to explain to you Mr. Guiterrez before you demanded to leave ” the doctor looked up at the towering figure of Damien and smiled at the Irish man clinging onto the hand of his patient.

“Are you two his carers?” The doctor questioned

“Something like that…” Damien replied as Finn smirked.

“OI!” Dom said still rubbing the back of his head.

“Paramedics said that the hotel staff had found him unconscious in a hotel room, we believe he has hit his head as he had some concussion symptoms. But he’s refusing treatment, says he has somewhere he needs to be?” The doctor questioned them.

Finn’s phone pinged and pulling it out from his pocket he looked down to a message from Rhea.

“Not somewhere, were trying to find someone! And I’m fine, I don’t need looking after” Dom tried to explain.

“Dom, shh. Listen to the doctor” Damien interjected before Finn tapped him on the shoulder showing him the message from Rhea.

“What is it?” Dom asked trying to peer over Damien’s shoulder, quickly realising he wasn’t exactly tall enough.

“We have to go, Doc we take full responsibility for him, Scouts honour!” Finn stated and took Dom’s hand rushing out the door, Damien followed hastily behind.

“You need to….” The doctor called after them, but it was too late.

“Sign the discharge forms.” He sighed and put the clipboard down on the enquiry desk, raising an eyebrow at the nurse who had been dealing with Finn’s outburst.

“Men…” She stated and turning on her heels she walked off in a huff.

----------------------------------

A familiar voice bought me back to reality, those all to recognisable tears I had only heard once before. They sounded so broken, so heartfelt. It was Rhea. Holding me tightly on the steps of the city library where I had sought out the silent solitude it had always offered. If you cannot speak in the library, then no one could ask me what was wrong.

I had only ever heard her cry with such emotion once, losing her nonna had caused such a devastating blow to her and that pain never truly leaves you. The one time we as humans wished we could turn off that emotional switch and feel nothing at all.

I wish I could have felt nothing in that moment, because how I did feel was not fair to her. It wasn’t fair to any of them. It wasn’t fair to me, but I couldn’t hide that truth. it was how I felt.

I resented her. I hated her. Why was she here. Why had she found me. Why did I have to feel this way.

Throwing myself up and out of her arms I lept into the dark street and stared back at the bewildered face of the woman I had grown to devote myself to. I couldn’t see a way to live my life without her, without any of them. My heart would never truly love anyone again the way the love for them I had, fed into my soul. I depended on them for my survival.

“Bunny please...” Rhea lept to her feet standing just a few feet from me in the road, reaching out her arm, hand outstretched. Her voice breaking from the cold and fear as she went to speak again but I interrupted her. It was as if something inside of me set off the dynamite that tore down the walls I had built up for so long and every last piece of vulnerability drowned the streets around us, refilling the puddles that had saturated the roads.

“NO! STOP! Please Rhea! No, shit no! Why!? Why are you here! Why can’t you understand!? CHRIST. WHY DOESN’T ANYONE UNDERSTAND!” I screamed and ran my hands over my face and through my hair clawing at my neck. I could barely breath, my lungs were on fire, my chest so tight. My entire body was soaked to the bone and frozen. Lips chapped and sense of reality fading fast. The anxiety inside me was fuelling a fire that was quickly spreading out of control.

“I want to…” Rhea tried to reason with me, her voice soft, fragile.

“I want to understand, Y/N please, just, talk to me. We can work this out, you and me. Just us… Look…” She turned her head signalling the space around us.

“It’s just you and me. It’s okay…” She spoke gently taking a step towards me.

That Panic set in.

“Don’t you fucking come near me, don’t you… don’t you fucking come near me!” I screamed. She didn’t deserve this; she had shown me nothing but love. Yet I had no control over it anymore. Like a tornado destroying everything in its path, this storm was out for blood.

“CHRIST, what is wrong with me! What is wrong with this world, what is wrong with this… this fucking, this bullshit! Everyone on it, no one understands. It’s like a prison… I feel, I feel like. Like I can’t breathe!” I grasped at my chest backing further away from her. As if a thousands rubber bands wrapped around my lungs, I was suffocating.

“Talk to me bunny, just talk to me. Whatever it is, we can fix it?” Rhea begged, she tried to reason with me.

I stared at her blankly. I knew this was going to hurt.

Fuck it.

“It’s you.” I said.

Cold.

Blunt.

To the point.

“It’s all of you.” My words were empty. As empty as I felt.

Rhea had nothing, no words. Nothing to say, no way of understanding why it was like this.

I had broken down, I couldn’t hold back the heart ache, the tears, none of it. I was an empty shell of myself, and every emotion poured out with every word.

“Every day. Every day I wake up, every day I wake up and I have to live. I live my life and then I go to sleep. Every day I am surrounded by the love you all give; I am surrounded by the happiness and the joy and the compassion that is gifted in the promise and security of the devotion we have for each other. The smiling faces of people passing by on their way to their boring jobs, their boring families, to pay their shitty boring rent. I stand here now knowing all this, knowing I am privileged to be living a life filled with more love in every second of every day than most people see in a lifetime.” I fell to my knees, unable to bear the weight of the world on my shoulders anymore.

“So why is it that every day when I open my eyes, when I look in the mirror, when that second of silence between a conversation hits, the first thought in my head, is how long is left?” I gritted my teeth, pouring out my heart to the world.

“Is it wrong to hate you, to resent you all so much. I feel such spite. I despise the love you all have for me because selfishly, I know, I know I can’t stop. I can’t kill myself. I can’t kill myself because that wouldn’t be fair. Not to you, not to the boys, not to my family or friends. The most important decision of my life and I don’t even get to make it” I looked up at Rhea with blood shot eyes.

“I don’t want to be unhappy anymore. I don’t want to be here, but I don’t have a reason to feel this way, and I don’t know why I do.”

Rhea threw herself to the floor around me and pulled me in tightly, I felt the bones in my back click and my chest restricted as her grasp tightened around me to the risk of never being able to let go.

No matter what now, she was never letting go.

I didn’t fight her anymore. Id given up fighting it.

Instead, I shielded myself in her embrace. Kissing the top of my head Rhea rested her chin on me, despite both being frozen I could feel her warmth breaking through.

“Y/N...” Rhea gently spoke looking deep into my eyes.

“That’s called being Human. And its shit. Its fucking shit, it’s unfair and its cruel. That’s why you don’t hide this away. You don’t try and fight a war all by yourself. You are more loved than you will ever know bunny! And whether you want it or not, its there. It will always be there, and we will always be here.”

Rhea took her hands around my face and pulled me in, so our foreheads connected.

“Were in this together, you and me. All of us. The boys too. Remember bunny, It’s not for forever. It’s just for now.”

As if something clicked, something unexplainable. Something spiritual in the moment, the world disappeared from around us, every element meant nothing except the two of us. Right there, the most important moment for us in all of time and space.

“You just keep going, for just one more minuite.” Rhea whispered under her breath.

For a moment it felt like time stood still, and the world had fallen silent in the honest truths that had been spoken.

Not for long though, for the sound of silence was broken by screeching tyres. Headlights illuminated our silhouettes and as if from out of nowhere a large rental truck slammed its brakes on coming to a stop.

The car door flew open and out fell Finn, scrambling to his feet he stood up with one hand on the door as his eyes widened, mixed with relief and with fear. His eyes were bloodshot, red and exhausted.

“Y/N?” he sounded shocked.

Rhea turned her head to face him and smile, but that relief on her face quickly changed to confusion.

“Finn? Where’s Damien? Where’s Dom?”

He didn’t answer her. Standing in silence as if he didn’t know how to respond to a question he very well knew the answer to.

I turned my head to face him, looking around for two people who weren’t there.

“Finn?” I looked up at him, trying to hide the worry in my eyes.

Letting out a gentle sigh Finn smiled and turned his back around as the back passenger door to the truck opened slowly as Damien stepped out, gently removing a sleeping Dominik from his lap and resting the boy against the car seat. He leant against the car door smiling at the two of us sitting in the middle of the road.

Rhea turned her head to face me and pulling my viewpoint to hers she looked deep into my eyes.

“Come on Bunny, Let’s go home”.

“Home?” I questioned her.

“Home.” She smiled, “We are going home.”

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