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dream-a-little-bigger-x · 1 year ago

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Memoriam | Spencer Reid

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Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

Warnings: depictions of abuse, pedophilia, talk of murder, panic attacks...

Author's note: This is a rewrite of S04E07 Memoriam because I'd had this idea of reader/OC being Spencer's best friend from Las Vegas and that they'd grown up together and were geniuses together, so when I saw this episode, it kind fit...

Words: 13,947

“Detective Y/L/N,” the captain of the North Las Vegas Police Department approached the Y/H/C woman at her desk. The woman swiveled in her chair, looking up at the man she called her boss. “Can you get the file of that petty arson on my desk by noon?”

“Sure thing, boss,” she nodded and swiveled back, returning to the very file she was just finishing up.

Y/N Y/L/N was the youngest detective at the Las Vegas Police Department. At just 22 years old, the girl had joined the department with three doctorates on her name and a BA in Sociology. Now, at 27 years of age, she was the most trusted, the most vetted detective in the department. Her co-workers trusted her more than anyone, all except Detective Hyde.

The man had known her since she was just a little girl. She was best friends with the son of one of his best friends. Maybe he didn’t like her because he still thought of her as the little girl she used to be. Or maybe he didn’t like her because she was a girl.

Just as she began focusing on her file again, a voice she knew all-too-well snapped her back out of that focus.

“Hi. I’m Special Agent Spencer Reid with the FBI,” the voice sounded.

Y/N turned around in the span of a nanosecond, her eyes locking on the source of said sound. There he was. Tall and beautiful as ever. The boy she had grown up with. Her non-biological-twin. Her best friend.

Slowly, she got up and approached the man she hadn’t seen in a couple of years. He was talking to one of her co-workers, but quickly got distracted when she spoke up. “Dr. Spencer Reid, as I live and breathe.”

His eyes snapped up, surprise and amazement written all over his face as he saw her. “Detective Y/N Y/L/N,” he scoffed in surprise. “Wow, it’s been–”

“Six years and forty-five days?” she cut him off with the exact number of years and days she had gone without seeing him. “Not that I’m counting, or anything.” She let out a small chuckle as he did the same.

Y/N Y/L/N and Spencer Reid had met when they were still in nappies. Their mothers had become fast friends when they were in labor together and gave birth to their kids on the exact same day, at the exact same time. Ever since that day, the two women have been inseparable, as did their kids. Both of them grew up to be geniuses with IQ’s through the roof. They went to school together, graduated high school at twelve years old and went on to graduate from the academy together.

While both of them applied for the Behavioral Analysis Unit at the FBI, only one of them got hired while the other settled for a life in Vegas with the Police Department there.

“Wh-what are you doing here?” she then asked when he didn’t move or say anything.

Spencer seemingly snapped out of a daze as he made a beeline for his oldest friend. “Do you remember Riley Jenkins?” he asked.

“Wasn’t he your imaginary friend?” she asked, but he quickly shook his head.

“That’s what I thought, but he actually existed. Can you maybe get everything the LVPD has on the 1984 murder of Riley?”

Y/N’s eyes widened. “He was murdered?”

“Yeah… And I think I know who might’ve done it.”

With a nod of her head, Y/N got to work. She researched every inch of the department until she finally came up with the files from the case in a cardboard box, along with Detective Hyde, who apparently worked the case.

“That was a rough one,” he sighed as he set the box down on Y/N’s desk.

“Did you work the case?” Spencer asked while his best friend started looking through some of the files. Memories flashed before her eyes from the time she went to Spencer’s little leagues games and practices.

“Yeah,” Detective Hyde replied. “I was three of four blocks away when the call came in on the radio. My first kid. You don’t forget those.”

Y/N looked up to notice Spencer’s sad expression, telling her he’d had his own ‘first kid’ at some point in his career.

Instead of pressing further on the sentiment, Spencer continued by asking another question. “Let me ask you this, were there any suspects?”

Something told Y/N he was fishing for a specific answer, something he hadn’t told her yet.

“We looked at the family initially. The dad, older brother,” Hyde explained.

“Makes sense. The boy was found in his own basement, right?” Spencer asked.

Hyde sighed. “Yeah. After a while the family got defensive, stopped cooperating…”

“Like the JonBenét case?” Y/N chimed in as the thought popped into her head.

The older man nodded his head in agreement. “I never liked them for it anyway,” he added. “I always figured it was somebody outside the home.” That seemed to elicit some kind of emotion from Spencer, though Y/N couldn’t decipher what it was just yet.

“What’s the Bureau’s interest in the case?” Y/N then asked.

Spencer’s eyes flitted to hers before focusing on the box in front of him. “Uh, research.” There was something he wasn’t telling them. Something important. He wasn’t here with the FBI, Y/N figured quickly. He was here of his own volition.

“Is this everything?” he then asked, diverting the subject.

“There might be another box down in Records,” Hyde responded, his confused eyes darting from the young agent to the young detective.

Spencer nodded his head. “I’d like to see it all, if you don’t mind.”

Nodding his head, Hyde left the two young adults alone to go and get the files they requested. As soon as the man was out of earshot, Y/N turned to the man she once knew as a kid. “What are you hiding from me, Dr. Reid?” she asked in a soft whisper.

Spencer didn’t answer and opened one of the files, showing a picture of the young boy to Y/N. “Don’t you remember him?” he asked. The kid in the picture gave the camera a soft smile. He was wearing a red Rovers T-Shirt and a red cap that hid his brown curls.

“From your little leagues games,” she stated as she grabbed the picture. “He was a little older than us, wasn’t he?”

Humming, Spencer nodded his head. “Yeah, he was six. Dad was his coach. He figured playing ball would make me normal.”

“But you aren’t normal,” Y/N said with a soft smile. “You’re extraordinary.” She tucked a strand of his hair that had fallen on his forehead behind his ear, but then quickly pulled away when she realized what she had done.

Spencer’s smile mirrored hers and he opened his mouth to say something, but Detecitve Hyde returned with the rest of the files, stopping the twenty-seven year old from doing so. Instead, he grabbed the files from Hyde, placed them inside the box in front of him and shut it before picking it up.

“It was nice seeing you again, Y/N/N,” he said with a smile and turned.

It hurt watching him walk away yet again. It had hurt not seeing or hearing from him for almost seven years. Having him here, close to her, felt right. Watching him walk into the precinct felt like a weight had lifted off her shoulders.

“Wait!” she called, stopping him in his tracks. “You need any help?”

Spencer turned back around and shook his head slightly. “No, that’s okay.”

As he turned back around, Y/N sighed and rushed forward, stepping in front of him so he couldn’t move. “You’re really just gonna walk out here and not talk to me again for the next seven years? Because that’s not something I can handle. I can tell you’re stressed. I can tell something’s bugging you about this case and I wanna help. I’m your best friend, Spence.” The entire time she talked, she looked at him, trying to gauge any reaction from his face. “And I don’t know if you remember, but I did also almost get into the BAU if another genius hadn’t rightfully taken the spot instead.”

Spencer sighed. “Y/N/N…”

“Don’t ‘Y/N/N’ me, Spence. I wanna help. So let me help.”

Another sigh elicited from the boy in front of her. “Fine. When do you get off?”

“Now,” she smiled, lying through her teeth. “Lemme get changed and I’ll join you, yeah?”

With a nod of approval from her best friend, Y/N went back to her desk and grabbed the finished file from her desk, dropping it off at the captain’s desk before making it into the locker room where she quickly changed into jeans and a top.

The two of them headed down to Fountainview, the hotel Spencer was staying at. The whole car ride down there, the two friends filled one another in on their lives. It was a pleasant conversation as though no time had passed. Spencer was still the one person she would feel safest with. He’d been her solace for the past twenty-seven years. Seven years apart didn’t change that.

“And then I just kicked him in the balls and left the club,” Y/N finished her story with a giggle as she and Spencer walked down the hallway on the fourth floor to his room. “It was–” she cut herself off when she heard a sound coming from the door they’d just stopped at. Judging from the look Spencer gave her, this was not supposed to be happening.

Slowly but surely, Spencer unlocked the door and walked in first, Y/N following closely behind, just in case she’d have to protect him. Inside the room, the tv was playing reruns of some sort of soap opera Y/N didn’t know the name of, and in front of said tv were two men, both older than Spencer and herself. One of them had to be in his mid-thirties while the other seemed a good twenty years older than them.

“What are you guys doing here?” Spencer asked, telling Y/N that he did know them.

“Hey,” the younger one greeted as Y/N and Spencer both moved further into the room. “What’s it look like we’re doing?” he asked, pointing at the tv.

Spencer moved to set down the box of files on the high stool next to him. “Breaking into my room and watching Days of Our Lives?”

“Young and the Restless,” the older man corrected before turning the tv off.

As Spencer put his messenger bag down, the two men looked up at the younger adults in the room. “Aren’t you supposed to be on a plane back to D.C.?” Spencer asked.

“And you’re supposed to be hanging out with your mom,” the older said before his eyes darted over to Y/N. “And I don’t think that’s your mom…”

Spencer looked back at Y/N, who gave the guys a shy wave. “That’s Detective Y/N Y/L/N. She’s my childhood best friend, we went to school together.”

“Didn’t you graduate at age twelve?” the younger one of the men asked.

With a grin, Y/N replied, “So did I.”

“Y/N/N, these are Derek Morgan and David Rossi, my co-workers,” Spencer quickly introduced them, pointing at each of them as he said their respective names.

“Nice to meet you, agents,” Y/N said politely, smiling.

Derek smiled back at Y/N, “You too, sweetheart.” The man had a flirty demeanor about him. The way he said the words, the way he looked at her, … All of it just told her that she shouldn’t take the words to heart. It was just how he was.

Then, Derek’s eyes moved over to the box on the chair to which he pointed. “Riley Jenkins?” he asked.

Spencer sniffled before stuffing his hands in his pockets, something he did to keep himself from fidgeting too much, Y/N knew. “Uh, no. That’s not… That’s actually not why I’m here. I–”

“He wanted to see me,” Y/N chimed in, noticing how the man was trying to talk himself out of it.

Whatever this Riley Jenkins case was to him, his co-workers couldn’t know.

Derek’s eyes flitted from Y/N to Spencer and back. “You don’t have to lie for him, sweetheart.”

“She’s not lying. That-that’s why I’m–”

“Reid,” Derek quickly interrupted as he placed his soda can down on the table between him and David. “Come on, man, who do you think you’re talking to?” He got up from the chair and approached Spencer and Y/N. “I know what this has been doing to you.”

David was next to get up from his spot. “Let us help,” he said.

Y/N couldn’t help but smile. His co-workers only wanted what was best for him, she could tell. The fact that they stayed behind in Las Vegas, knowing their co-worker needed their help, was very telling to her.

“Maybe together we can find out who killed him,” David added.

“I think I might already know,” Spencer responded with a fearful tremor in his voice that only Y/N caught onto. Her eyebrows furrowed the more she heard him talk about it and the more she watched him and his behavior.

“So, tell us about the suspect,” Derek encouraged.

Y/N watched his shoulder tense ever so slightly. “The truth is, I don’t know anything about him.”

The puzzle pieces clicked in Y/N’s mind. His sudden interest in the case, the lie about the bureau’s interest in the case, the tension in his shoulders… She knew everything about Spencer’s life and the one thing neither of them knew very much about was the reason why he was doing this in the first place. “Your dad…” Y/N whispered.

The agents exchanged some glances before Spencer started unloading the case files from the box and spreading them out on the bed with Y/N helping him out.

“Before we go down this road, you need to be sure,” David pointed out, worry evident in his voice.

“He’s right,” Derek chimed in. “Some rocks don’t need looking under.”

Y/N looked up at Spencer as he sighed. “My mind is sending me signals. I can’t ignore them any more.”

“Mixed signals,” Y/N muttered, capturing everyone’s attention. “That’s what the subconscious is all about, you know that better than anyone, Spence.”

Nodding, Derek continued, “Reid, your dad left you.” Y/N noticed Spencer’s shoulders tensing ever so slightly. “You take it to the Freudian extreme, you could say that he killed your childhood.”

Y/N’s heart broke a little at the memory of Spencer’s dad leaving. Though he never really talked about it with her, she knew how much it had hurt. She was there for it all. She was there to pick up the pieces of his broken heart and glue them back together in any way she could.

“It could explain a dream in which you see him as a murderer,” David noted.

Spencer shook his head. “I’ve come this far, I’m not going back.”

His two co-workers exchanged glances once more before the four of them got to work. As each of them grabbed a file to look over, they gathered in the living area to go over the case together. While Spencer and David occupied each of the lounge chairs, Derek paced the length between it and Y/N was perched on the armrest of the chair Spencer was sitting on.

“Riley was six at the time. His father, Lou Jenkins, was supposed to pick him up from T-ball practice at four, but he got delayed at work, prompting Riley to walk the three blocks home,” Spencer started to explain the case.

Y/N nodded her head, already pretty familiar with the case. “When his mother got home in the early evening, she found him dead in the basement,” she continued.

“So the offender came to the house after the boy arrived home,” Rossi noted, his eyes flicking up to the younger agent and his best friend.

“Or picked him up on the way there,” Spencer offered his two cents.

Derek stopped pacing for a moment as he spoke up. “Coaxes Riley into the basement, where he sexually assaults him.”

A shiver ran down Y/N’s back as she thought of the boy she once knew.

“The boy’s mouth was taped shut,” David read from his file.

“Symbolic,” Y/N answered. “The perp fears Riley will talk, panics, weighs his options, …”

“Decides to make certain that he’ll never talk,” Derek finished her thought before sitting down on one of the chairs to her right.

David then continued, “He finds a knife in the fishing gear under the stairs, stabs Riley nine times in the chest. Stuffs him behind the washing machine.” The older man closed the file with a sigh.

“So, the UnSub’s a white male in his late twenties to early thirties,” Spencer pondered.

Y/N turned to him for a moment. “UnSub?”

“Unknown Subject,” he quickly whispered, reminding her of the theory they had seen when they were in the academy together. Having not used the term in over seven years, a girl can sometimes forget. Unlike Spencer, she didn’t have an eidetic memory.

“So that means we’re looking for someone in his fifties,” David spitballed.

“And he likely knew the boy, maybe even been to his house,” Derek went on.

“Neighbor,” David finished, having Derek nod his head in agreement.

Finding her best friend a little too quiet for his own good, Y/N looked down to find him looking at a map of North Las Vegas. It was clear his brain was picking up on something but the thought hadn’t quite finished processing yet.

“Spence?” she asked, capturing his attention. “What is it?”

“My family lived less than a half mile from the Jenkinses,” he said, then pointed at a house a couple squares away from his. “And so did yours.”

“Do you think your dad knew the boy?” Rossi questioned, brows furrowed before he glanced over to Y/N. “What about yours?”

The girl shook her head. “Mine’s been dead since before I was born. Died in combat while my mother was pregnant with me.”

“I don’t know,” Spencer then answered his co-worker’s question. “My memory is…” he rubbed his eye in frustration. “The lack of recall just reinforces how little I knew about him.”

A sigh heaved Derek’s chest as he turned to his youngest colleague. “Reid, we’re gonna have to track him down. You do know that.”

“We should talk to my mother first, neighbors, get their impressions,” Spencer suggested instead, clearly not ready for a reunion with his father just yet. Noticing the tension in his shoulders, Y/N placed her hand on his shoulder, squeezing ever so slightly to let him know she was there for him.

“Reid, I don’t need to tell you that this signature was need-based and sexual in nature,” Rossi sounded almost reassuring. “The man we’re looking for is a pedophile.” Spencer’s jaw tensed. “So, I’ll ask you again, are you sure you want to go down this road?”

Derek and Y/N glanced over to Spencer before the guy got up with slight hesitation in his movements. “I’m gonna talk to my mother first.” He turned to the Y/H/C girl next to him. “You wanna come?”

Nodding her head, Y/N followed behind Spencer as the two of them made their way to the sanitarium where his mother was a patient. Y/N had been there a few times to visit Diana without Spencer knowing. After all, she’d been the one to push Spencer to send his mother there when they were eighteen.

“Oh, Y/N/N!” Diana greeted in excitement, seemingly happier to see the girl than her own son. “I’m so happy to see you again. Did you read the book I gave you last time?”

Spencer turned his head towards his best friend in confusion. “Last time?” he asked.

Decidedly ignoring him, Y/N nodded her head in response to Diana’s question. “I did. I absolutely loved it. Just like you told me I would,” she told her with a soft smile, placing a hand on her arm. “Hey, how about a game of scrabble, huh?” She motioned to the board game in front of them.

Diana offered her a smile as the three of them started playing. The young woman could feel her best friend shifting in his seat, his brain whirring at thousands of miles per hour. He was spiraling, anxious to ask his questions.

“Mom…” he then finally started as Y/N was placing her letters on the board to form a word. “Can I ask you some questions about Dad? I’m having trouble remembering.”

“Quixotry,” Diana read Y/N’s word. “That’s a great word, Y/N/N.” The woman beamed at the girl before turning to her son. “What do you wanna know?” She was now focused on her turn, trying to find a good word.

“Did he like to be around children?” Spencer asked carefully.

Diana looked up from the board. “Children? Well, yes.” She returned her gaze to the game a little too quickly. Something was telling Y/N that the woman she had called her second mom was hiding something. “If it were up to him, you’d have a house full of brothers and sisters.”

“You didn’t want more kids?” Y/N then asked, genuinely interested.

With a proud smile, Diana looked from the girl to her son. “Why mess with perfection?” She winked at Y/N with a smirk on her face. The young woman looked up at her best friend, who was gazing at his mother in admiration.

“Yeah, it was pretty perfect on the first go,” Y/N agreed. Her admission caused Spencer to tear his eyes away from his mother to land on her instead. The sparkle in his eyes still remained the same, even after seven years. Even after all these years, she still had to deny the butterflies in her stomach she got whenever he looked at her like that.

Shaking himself away from his thoughts, Spencer turned back to his mother. “What about other people’s children? How was he around them?”

“He was good with kids, I guess,” Diana responded. “He coached your Little League team.”

Y/N nodded her head. “I remember that, always trying to put him into normal activities.”

“I tried to tell him you’re not normal, you were exceptional,” Diana added to this, smiling up at her son. It was nice to hear the words she thought of Spencer come from his own mother. Though Spencer himself wasn’t really hearing it.

“Let me ask you this, Mom,” he said, shifting in his chair and pushing his hair back. “Did you ever get the feeling like, on his part, the marriage was just for show?”

“Spence,” Y/N hissed, wanting to keep him from hurting his own mother’s feelings.

However, Diana wasn’t too phased about the question. “These questions are very strange, Spencer. What is this about?” she asked instead.

“It’s about Riley Jenkins,” he said, almost tearfully.

“Riley Jenkins?” Diana asked. “I told you he was someone you made up.”

“He’s not, though, Diana,” Y/N told her softly, reaching for her hand. The woman looked at her with confusion in her eyes, begging her to explain what was going on.

“He was a real boy who lived in our neighborhood, and somebody killed him, and…” Spencer continued as his mother looked at him, allowing the words to simmer in her mind. “I don’t know, I think that Dad might have had something to do with it.”

Diana’s grip on Y/N’s hand tightened. “He was real?”

“Yeah,” Y/N answered in a whisper, squeezing right back. “He was on that Little League team, too. With Spence. I-I remember going to the games and the practices with my mom to cheer him on.”

Y/N could hear Spencer sniffle, so with the hand she wasn’t holding Diana’s, she reached out for Spencer’s, holding both Reid’s hands tightly. There was nothing else they were going to get out of Diana and Y/N knew that. So, after a few moments of holding mother and son, Y/N let their hands go.

“We’ll let you get some rest, mama,” she told Diana with a soft smile before turning to Spencer, urging him to get up, too. “We’ll be back to visit soon, okay?” She kissed the woman’s cheek before taking a few steps back to let Spencer say goodbye to his mother. Once he did, the two of them fell into step together.

“You visit her?” he asked when they were outside.

Y/N shrugged. “One of us has to,” she simply replied before getting in the car again.

After informing the two other agents of the information they got from Diana, Derek, Spencer and Y/N headed into town to find Lou Jenkins, Riley’s father. They explained everything to Lou about their theory of William Reid being the one who killed his son.

“It’s just a theory, Mr. Jenkins,” Spencer reassured him.

The man threw something in the back of his truck, Y/N couldn’t see what it was, before he turned to the agents and detective. “You must be out of your damn minds,” he said.

“We’re just trying to get some new facts,” Y/N stated.

Lou turned to the Y/H/C, trying to appear intimidating towards her, but none of that ever worked on Y/N. Unlike Spencer, Y/N had actually grown a spine to stand up against bullies and men who tried to overpower her.

“Well, you’re hell and gone from facts if you think Will Reid killed my son,” he said, nearly spitting in the girl’s face. Derek placed a hand on the man’s shoulder, pushing him back from Y/N.

“So, you were friends?” Spencer asked instead.

Glancing between the agents and detective, Lou recoiled a little. “Who the hell are you to come here asking this?”

“I’m his son,” Spencer answered, stopping the man dead in his tracks. Lou looked at the young man in front of him.

“Spencer?” he asked and the boy she once knew made a reappearance with the expression on his face. “Spencer, a G-man.” He then turned to Y/N. “And the Y/H/C never too far from ya, hey?” A blush fanned across Y/N’s cheeks. She had always been Spencer’s shadow to everyone else but to Spencer and their moms. “I still don’t understand.”

“Was William around your house often?” Derek questioned.

“Yeah, the occasional barbecue, that sort of thing.”

“Was Riley around on those occasions?” Y/N continued.

Lou’s eyes flitted from the girl to the two men flanking her. “Why are you doing this?”

“I need to know,” Spencer replied and pressed his lips together.

Noticing the tension in his shoulders returning, Y/N reached for the balled-up fist on his side and unfurled his fingers, placing her palm against his and intertwining their fingers. It was something she used to do whenever he was panicking about something in school or when the bullies would get to him again.

He visibly relaxed as she hid their intertwined hands behind her back.

“Take it from someone who does know. He was a good man,” Lou reassured them, but something about the way he said it struck Y/N. Neither of the agents noticed it as Derek turned and patted Spencer on the stomach, his arm grazing Y/N’s chest as she stood between the two men.

“Thanks for your time,” Derek said as he walked away.

Y/N began to let go of Spencer’s hand to follow behind Derek when Spencer’s grip on her tightened as he stayed put. “Where is he these days?” he asked Lou. “My dad?”

“It’s been years, but he’s probably still at that same firm in Summerlin,” Lou answered.

Spencer’s grip loosened on Y/N’s hand as he slumped. “He’s been in town this whole time?” Her heart broke at the sight of him. Once again, Spencer’s dad broke the boy’s heart and Y/N was there to pick up the pieces.

That was never going to end, was it?

“As far as I know,” Lou replied before Spencer let go of Y/N and turned on his heel.

Y/N shot one last smile at Lou before falling into step with the two agents.

“You know Summerlin?” Derek asked both of them.

“Yeah, it’s like nine miles east of here,” Spencer replied.

“Off the 95,” Y/N finished his sentence.

“He was ten minutes away and he never let me know.”

Rossi joined the three of them at the company William Reid worked at. As they entered what seemed to be the lobby of the law firm, Y/N started to look around to take in her surroundings. Before she could take anything in, an unfamiliar voice sounded.

“Can I help you, gentleman?” The woman behind the desk got up and walked towards the front desk. One glance at the small board on her table told Y/N her name was Ms. Cahill. “And lady,” she added when her eyes fell on the Y/H/C.

“Yeah,” Spencer replied and then fell silent. He inhaled a couple of times, opening his mouth to say anything, but nothing came out.

“We’d like to speak with William Reid,” Y/N said in his place.

“Is he expecting you?” Ms. Cahill asked.

“I don’t think so,” Rossi said before flashing the woman his FBI badge.

While the woman told them Will was in a meeting, Y/N’s eyes landed on Spencer. He was having difficulty breathing, like he was on the verge of a panic attack, something Y/N knew all-too-well. The boy used to have them all the time when they were kids and Y/N was always the one to help him out of it.

“Are you okay?” Derek asked before Y/N could.

Spencer nodded his head. “Yeah. No. Yeah, I’m going to go to the bathroom.” Before either of them could say anything, he sped off towards the bathroom, leaving Y/N with his co-workers.

“I’ve never seen him like this,” Derek pointed out.

A heavy sigh heaved Y/N’s chest. “I have,” she said. “Excuse me.”

She pushed past Derek and followed Spencer to the bathroom, not even caring she was entering the boys’ bathroom. Her heart and mind were set out on helping her best friend. She didn’t care much about bathroom etiquette.

“Spence?” she called out just before one of the stalls slowly opened. The man walked out of the cubicle, hands shaking and lip trembling. “Hey, you okay?” He simply shook his head before placing empty vials of something on the sink. Y/N reached for one, inspecting the label. Her heart sank. “Dilaudid, seriously, Spence?” Her voice contained more anger than she had intended to.

He splashed a bit of water in his face and blindly reached for the paper towels. Quickly jumping to his aide, Y/N handed him two. “Don’t, Y/N/N. You weren’t there,” he told her calmly as he dried his face.

“For what? For you to get hopped up on some drug?” She held the vial up for emphasis.

“For me being kidnapped and tortured!” The volume of his voice went up ever so slightly.

The anger that resided on Y/N’s chest washed away as her heart plummeted into her stomach. “What?” she whispered, her eyes filling up with tears. “Spencer…”

“Let’s just get this over with,” he said and pushed past her before she could even say anything else. Letting out a frustrated sigh, Y/N followed behind him and joined the other agents and Spencer’s father.

“Did something happen?” Y/N heard William ask.

“That’s what we’re trying to find out,” Spencer responded in a cool, toned-down manner, much different from how he was moments before. The dilaudid seemed to be working quickly, Y/N thought. “Hello, Dad.”

William Reid looked at his son as if he’d seen the ghost of Christmas past. Y/N was suddenly reminded of all the times she had spent at the Reids’ and every time William picked them both up from school because her mother was working overtime and couldn’t pick her up.

“Spencer…” William whispered before his eyes landed on the girl next to him. “I’m glad you two are still together.”

Y/N couldn’t help but scoff at his comment. There had been so much in the last seven years she didn’t even know about. So much had happened. So much for which she should’ve been there for him. Too much, it seemed.

“Let’s talk in my office.” William invited the four of them into his office. While he himself took a seat on the armchair, Rossi opted for the couch opposite of him. After what happened in the bathroom, Y/N felt withdrawn from her best friend and opted to lean against the bookshelves, Derek joining her quickly, while Spencer stayed put near the door.

“You don’t look like me any more,” William told his son. “You used to. Everybody said so.”

Y/N’s eyes flicked towards Spencer, who was exhibiting a cool stance towards his father. “They say some people look like their dogs, too,” he started. “It’s attributed to prolonged mutual exposure. Elderly couples, also. They unconsciously mimic the expressions of people they’ve been around their whole life. It’s why we’ve been called non-biological twins our whole life,” he said, motioning towards Y/N at the end. “So it kind of makes sense that I wouldn’t really look like you. I haven’t seen you in twenty years.”

No one else noticed it, but Spencer’s bottom lip quivered. He was keeping up a strong facade, but it didn’t fool Y/N.

“So, are you in town on work?” William asked.

“We’re just wrapping up a case,” Rossi intervened smoothly. Maybe Y/N wasn’t the only one who noticed Spencer’s lip quivering. They were profilers after all, studying everyone’s behavior.

“A five-year-old boy was abducted and murdered,” Derek chimed in.

William looked up at Derek and Y/N. “I read about that. Ethan Hayes, right?” Glancing over at Y/N, Spencer’s eyebrows furrowed at his father’s behavior and he knew she had taken note, too. “That’s terrible.”

“Yeah,” Spencer agreed. “That case got me thinking about Riley Jenkins.”

“You remember Riley Jenkins, Mr. Reid?” Y/N questioned.

William nodded. “Of course.”

“I’ve been having dreams about him for a really long time,” Spencer explained. “But when I came back here for this case, it jogged something and the dream changed. I saw his killer and it was you.”

Along with Spencer’s co-workers, Y/N paid close attention to William to see if anything in his behavior or reaction would tip them off.

“Interesting dream,” William said, oddly calmly.

Y/N’s head tilted slightly. “You don’t seem that surprised.”

Turning back to his son, William smiled ever so slightly. “I stopped being surprised by Spencer’s mind a long time ago.” The man almost sounded proud.

“There are certain criteria we consider when looking at this type of suspect,” Rossi continued, ignoring the pride in William’s face. “You fit parts of that profile.”

William glanced at Y/N, a familiar face for guidance. When she didn’t offer any, he turned back to Rossi. “Me?”

“We just want your cooperation,” said Rossi.

“My cooper–” William chuckled in disbelief as he glanced at every person in the room. Neither of them were giving him any satisfactory answer, all four of them glaring at him to gauge his reaction. “You’re not actually saying you think I killed Riley Jenkins.”

Spencer shook his head ever so slightly. “We didn’t say that.”

“Good. Because that’s absurd.”

“We’d just like permission to look through your computer, access your records,” Derek stated.

William leaned forward in his chair. “And what would you be looking for, exactly?” No answer came forth, telling the hot-shot lawyer enough. “You want access to my files, get a warrant.”

Having asked him enough questions, the team of four returned to the hotel. Rossi and Derek got their own rooms while Y/N joined Spencer in his. She wanted to help him on the case a little more, see if they could come up with something together. Plus, if it gave her the chance to ask him some questions about what had happened to him, it would be even better.

As the two of them turned the corner in the hallway, Spencer dialed another co-worker’s number. Penelope Garcia, he’d explained to her. Tech analyst at the BAU. Computer wizard. “Yeah, we’re not gonna get a warrant so we’re going to have to go under the radar on this one, Garcia.”

“You want me to hack your father’s network,” Y/N could hear Penelope’s voice from the other side of the line. “You’re sure about this?”

The two of them stopped in front of room number 419. “I really wish people would stop asking me that,” he said to Penelope as he reached into his pocket for his keycard. He hung up the phone as he opened the door, stopping in his tracks as his foot stepped on something that wasn’t the carpet. His sudden halting caused Y/N to bump into him.

With confusion written in her eyes, she watched as Spencer bent down to require the folder that was on the floor. It was a brown envelope with a post-it stuck on the flap. “You’re looking at the wrong guy”, it read.

Spencer glanced over his shoulder at his best friend. “Do you know about this?”

She shook her head in response before he opened the envelope and fished out the files inside. At the very top of the bundle was a picture attached. More accurately, a mugshot from someone named Gary B Michaels.

Spencer glanced at Y/N before leaving the room again, this time, with the file in hand. Slightly frustrated by his lack of communication, Y/N followed behind, closing the door behind her but not before checking if Spencer had taken the roomkey with him.

Rossi and Morgan were in the downstairs bar, nursing a drink when the two younger ones joined them, Y/N a mere half a minute later. Spencer handed them the envelope without a word.

“Was the envelope dropped off at the front desk first?” Rossi asked.

“Nope, I asked the front desk. No one dropped anything off for Spencer,” Y/N replied.

Rossi nodded his head in thought. “So, they know what room you were in.”

“I do have to admit, the timing of this seems a little suspicious,” Derek agreed.

“Yeah, an hour after I see my father, we’re handed another suspect.”

Rossi looked up from the file. “You think you knew this guy?”

“I don’t know,” Spencer replied. “I think so but I’m not sure. I … No, I don’t know.” He was stuttering and chaotically jumping from one thought to the other.

Nodding at Y/N, Derek asked, “What about you? Have you seen him before?”

“Can’t say that I have… Or…” she reached for the picture again, looking at the man properly and in a more lit-up room. The dark eyes pierced through Y/N’s Y/E/C ones as if he could reach through the photo and just grab her like that, transporting her to her childhood.

“That’s a pretty dress.”

Before she could go any further in that memory, Rossi’s voice stopped her. “‘Exposed himself to a minor.’ That’s a precursor to molestation,” he said and his words threw Y/N right back.

She was at the playground, waving her ribbon around while Spencer was playing chess by himself, when a man stopped her in her tracks.

“That’s a pretty dress,” he complimented her cherry-patterned dress her mother had put her in that morning, even though she wanted to wear pants and a T-shirt. Y/N looked up at him. He was tall and his hair was smoothed back by gel, leaving it sticky and greasy-looking.

“Thank you,” innocent, unknowing Y/N responded. “Mommy picked it out for me.”

“Are those real cherries?” he asked and crouched to her level, reaching for the dress, feeling its fabric between his fingers.

Young Y/N frowned at him. “Of course not, silly.”

“I think it is,” he replied and tickled her belly before pretending to eat a handful of cherries, causing the young girl to laugh. “You like cherries?” Y/N nodded her head eagerly. “So do I.”

“Y/N/N?” Spencer’s voice brought her right back to the present day. She blinked rapidly, adjusting to the bright light of the hotel’s lobby. “You okay?” he asked. Before she could say anything, Derek’s phone rang, cutting the men’s worry for the young woman away.

“It’s Garcia,” Derek said before picking up and putting the phone on speaker. “Talk to me, baby girl.”

Y/N gave the man an intrigued look, but decided not to say anything.

“I’m not interrupting boy time at Crazy Horse Too, am I?” the peppy-sounding woman asked.

“You know that’s not my thing. I’m more for in-room entertainment.”

“I can’t help you there, but I do give good phone.”

Y/N looked over at Spencer who gave her a look that told her this was how they always interacted with one another.

“Let me hear what you’ve got.”

“Reid, we’ve been all up in your father’s business,” Garcia started.

“What did you find?”

“Well, let me tell you first what I did not find. No kiddie porn, no membership to illicit websites, no dubious e-mails, no chat room history.”

“What about his finances?” Spencer asked, his shoulders tensing a little again.

Another voice came through the speaker now, one Y/N didn’t recognize. He sounded like a strong male, very authoritative voice. “We went back ten years. No questionable transactions that we could find.”

“Well, he did buy a ticket to see Céline Dion six months ago,” another woman’s voice came next. “But I think we can overlook that.”

Y/N couldn’t help but smile ever so slightly. Céline Dion was very often playing in their house. Both at Spencer’s and at her own. The two families were pretty crazy about the French-Canadian singer.

“He’s smart. Is it possible he kept things under the table?” Spencer wanted to know next.

The man’s voice sounded through again. “Well, of course. But from what we can tell, Reid, he doesn’t fit the profile.”

“We can tell you other things about him, if you want to know,” the female voice that wasn’t Garcia’s said.

Spencer looked down at Y/N as if to find his footing again. “I’m listening.”

“Uh, he’s a workaholic. He actually logs more hours than we do,” the woman said. “He makes decent money, but he doesn’t spend a lot of it. He has a modest house, he drives a hybrid. He doesn’t travel much, he stays away from the casinos. And according to his veterinary bills, he has a very sick cat.”

The man spoke next. “He appears to spend most of his free time alone, and goes to the movies a lot, and he reads. And from his collection of first editions, it seems his favorite author is…”

“Isaac Asimov. I remember that one,” Spencer cut him off. He was agitated, doubting every single belief he had about his father. Though she was still kind of upset with him, Y/N reached for his hand again and intertwined their fingers, hoping that would ground him again.

“He does have one other major interest. On his home computer he’s archived a gajillion things on one common subject,” Garcia took over again.

A smile spread on Y/N’s face, knowing what she was going to say.

“What?” Spencer asked.

“You, kiddo.” Y/N could hear the smile in Garcia’s voice and she squeezed Spencer’s hand. “He’s got like everything that’s been published online. Every article you’ve been quoted in, pieces you’ve written for behavioral science journals. He even has a copy of your dissertation.”

“He’s keeping tabs on you,” Y/N told him, beaming. “That’s saying something.”

“Yeah, and he Googled me. That makes up for everything,” he said before pushing past his colleagues, letting go of the one hand that could ground him. “I need some air.”

“Spence!” Y/N called, but he was already gone.

Derek sighed as he spoke into the phone again. “You guys still there?”

“I thought we were giving him good news,” Garcia sighed, too. “Also, who else is there? I swore I heard a woman’s voice.”

“Oh, that would be me,” Y/N answered. “I’m Detective Y/N Y/L/N. Spencer’s childhood best friend. I’m trying to help out here, wherever I can.”

“Didn’t you apply for the spot at the BAU, too?” the male voice sounded again. “I remember seeing your resume on my desk.”

Y/N let out an awkward chuckle. “Yeah, I did. But, uh, you chose Spencer over me. Which is totally valid. He’s a great guy and I bet he’s a great asset to your team.”

“I’m sorry we didn’t pick you, Detective Y/L/N,” the man said.

“It’s fine. I’m proud of Spencer for getting in anyway and I’m happy in my job, so. Hey, no resentment, all right?”

“Glad to hear that. Can we do anything else for you guys there?”

Derek held the phone up to his mouth. “Yeah, look up a name for us, if you would. Gary Brandan Michaels.”

The name alone sent shivers down Y/N’s spine, bringing her right back to that day on the playground.

His hand moved from her belly down to her short legs, placing one on the back of her knee. “Could you do a twirl for me, pretty girl?”

She quickly snapped herself back out of it and looked up at the two men in front of her. “I need some air,” she whispered and took off the same way Spencer did. Trying to find her breathing again, she stopped around the corner and focused on her respiration. It wasn’t until she heard his familiar voice that she looked up again to take in her surroundings. She found herself on the other side of the lobby where they had some of those casino machines. One of which was manned by her best friend.

He was accompanied by a blonde girl in a sparkly purple dress. She was sitting a bit too close to her best friend for Y/N’s liking.

“Normally video poker odds are slightly worse, at point-seven percent in your favor, but if you employ optimal strategy and always draw for the royal flush, you can push those odds to point-two percent,” Spencer explained to the woman.

“Hmm,” the woman hummed. “Smart and handsome.”

Spencer looked up at this, but his eyes weren’t on the woman for more than a second as they caught something behind her. Or rather someone.

“So are you in town for the convention?” she asked while reaching for a cigarette.

Spencer slightly shook his head to force himself to pry his eyes away from the beautiful Y/H/C in the corner who was looking at him, too. “Um, there are twelve conventions in town this week, which one are you talking about?”

“Take your pick,” she said, laughing, before lighting the cigarette.

Upon seeing this, Y/N walked over. “Six minutes,” she mumbled. The woman’s eyes landed on the newest addition to their conversation as she blew out her smoke, though Y/N couldn’t but focus on how Spencer’s lips twitched up into a smile.

“Excuse me?” the woman asked, clearly offended.

Spencer shook his head slightly with a smile. “I-it was something I used to say to my mom to try to get her to quit smoking. A cigarette takes six minutes off your life. So every time she’d light one, I’d say, ‘that’s six minutes less that I get to spend with you’.”

“Aw! Did it work?”

If Y/N hated how the woman was so charmed by her best friend, she was very much showing it, though neither of them noticed.

“No,” Spencer replied chuckling.

“Because I’ve tried it all. The gum, the patch, nothing works.”

The Y/H/C let out a chuckle. “You should try hypnosis, they’ve had a lot of success in the–” Just as the idea popped into Y/N’s head, it seemingly did in Spencer’s, too, as his head snapped up at her with wide eyes.

“Tell you what, I’ll put mine out if you buy me a drink,” the woman tried, but Spencer wasn’t even listening anymore.

Grimacing at the woman, Y/N placed her hands on Spencer’s shoulders. “Not today, sweetheart.”

Just as Spencer turned in his chair, Derek and David joined Y/N’s side. “We’ve been looking all over the place for both of you. Come on,” said Derek with a serious expression on his face.

Spencer got up from his chair and took Y/N’s hand in his, entwining their fingers to give her the support and calmth she needed after her near-panic attack just mere moments earlier.

“Hey! You won like two-thousand dollars here,” the woman called.

“Keep it,” Spencer told her over his shoulder.

“You do realize you just gave two grand to a hooker,” Rossi pointed out.

Derek’s eyes glanced from the woman in the purple dress to Spencer to Y/N. “Must’ve been quite a conversation. What was it about?”

“How to stop smoking,” Spencer replied before walking off, dragging Y/N with him.

Outside, Spencer explained his plan. Derek and Rossi weren’t entirely in on the plan, but Y/N convinced them that it could help.

“I could sit in,” Y/N suggested, but Rossi shook his head.

“No, I’ll sit in, make sure everything’s going well.”

Furrowing her eyebrows, Y/N looked at him. “Why not? We’re practically soulmates, we–I can help.”

“That’s just it, Y/N,” Derek chimed in. “You’re too close. Let Rossi do it. We’ll wait out here.”

After a reassuring nod from Spencer, Y/N sat down next to Derek, allowing Rossi to go in with him. She didn’t love this. Her best friend might get hurt and she wouldn’t even be there to patch up the breakage.

“You and Spencer…” Derek started once the silence settled over them in the waiting room. “You’ve been more than friends?”

“No,” Y/N shook her head.

“But you wanted to?”

Y/N’s head snapped up, her eyes wide. Never had she even admitted to herself that what she felt for Spencer was more than platonic. She didn’t want to admit it, scared that it was true and it was going to ruin what they had going on.

“I–How do you know?” she asked, her voice quiet and vulnerable.

A soft laugh erupted from Derek’s throat. “I’m a profiler, Y/L/N. Besides, it’s blatantly obvious.”

“How so?”

“Come on, the way you look at each other, the way you hold each other’s hands…”

Y/N’s brows furrowed. “Wait,” she said, confusion laced in her voice. “You’re not saying ‘you’. You’re not talking about the way I look at him, but the way we look at each other…”

“Pretty Boy’s blatantly in love with you, too, genius.”

Scoffing, Y/N shook her head. “Yeah, and I’m the Queen of England.”��

Derek wetted his lips as he chuckled. “All right, Your Majesty. Whatever you wanna believe…”

“Y/N/N!” the sudden scream of her name caused her to jolt from her chair and rush into the practice where she found Spencer on the couch, panting and frantically looking around the room.

“Spence,” she whispered and rushed to his side, relieving Rossi from his protective duty. “Spence, you’re okay. You’re okay. You’re okay.” She soothed him, allowing him to grab onto her hand as she smoothed his hair back and pressed kisses to his head. “You’re okay.”

Once Spencer had calmed down and explained to his co-workers and Y/N what he had seen, he had decided to go back to his mother to confront her and ask her about that day.

“Do you want me to come with you?” Y/N asked, her voice soft and fragile.

Spencer looked down at her and nodded her head. “Please,” he whispered.

Derek dropped them off at Bennington Sanitarium, wanting to wait for the couple in the car until they were ready. The whole way to her room, Spencer held Y/N’s hand tightly, power walking through the familiar hallways. They found her in her room where Spencer explained what he had seen in his vision. Y/N watched from the sidelines and noticed how Diana became more and more agitated.

“Try to remember, Mom,” said Spencer, needing to push her a little.

“No, I can’t.”

“You were there. You watched Dad burn the bloody clothes.”

Diana shook her head. “You had a dream.”

“Mom, this was not a dream,” Spencer pressed, causing his mother to turn around to face him. “This was a memory. It was a memory and I saw you.”

She walked up to him and grabbed his face in her hands lovingly. “Your mind. Such a treasure. Even as a baby you knew about things you weren’t supposed to know.”

“This is not about me. This is about Riley Jenkins.”

“It was always about you,” Diana said in a whisper, matching her son’s tone of voice.

“Please, Mom. Please. Please just try to remember,” Spencer tried again as he grabbed her hands and guided her over to her bed where they sat down. “Remember Riley. Riley.”

“Riley… Riley,” she mimed as she let the name simmer in her brain. “Riley was real. Poor Riley.”

“Yes,” Spencer whispered. “Poor Riley. Poor Riley. Did Dad do something to him?”

Diana looked up at her son in surprise. “Dad? No.”

“Think, think, think,” Spencer pressed.

“No, no, no, no. That’s– No, no. Now you’re confusing me, Spencer. No.” She placed her hands over her face. It was stressing her out. He was pressing and pushing her too far.

“Spence,” Y/N tried softly, but he didn’t hear her.

“You knew, Mom. You knew about Dad and you didn’t do anything.”

“No, you don’t know. No! No, no, you don’t know! You don’t…” Then, she started to yell out her ‘no’s before getting up and starting to hit herself.

“Mama,” Y/N walked up to her and tried to keep her from hurting herself, but Spencer quickly pulled her away and let the nurses push past them to get Diana in control. As the two of them watched the nurses put something in her arm to calm her down, they held onto one another tightly. Spencer’s lips were pressed against Y/N’s hair, the scent of her shampoo calming him down.

“He got to Y/N/N,” Diana whispered once the medicine started working.

Y/N and Spencer exchanged glances before Spencer let go of the girl. “What? What did you say?”

“He got to Y/N/N and it could’ve been you, too.”

The flashbacks she’d been having were real. They were actual memories from her childhood. From the guy that touched her and asked her to twirl. The guy that killed Riley Jenkins was the same guy that played with her with her ribbon.

It could’ve been either of them, instead of Riley.

The following day, Y/N went back to work, not entirely ready to face her captain’s wrath about missing a few days, but she had to go through it. He wasn’t entirely happy, but the girl didn’t get fired either. A warning, Hyde had said. Another one and she’d be out.

For as long as she could, she tried to focus on her work. It was a simple filing day, so there didn’t need to be too many brain cells involved in this activity. Lucky for her, because most of her brain cells were focusing on the Riley Jenkins case, her conversation with Derek about Spencer and Spencer himself.

Y/N knew she had a crush on her best friend. She had since they were sixteen but she couldn’t admit that to anyone else. Not even herself.

“What was Lou Jenkins doing here?” The familiar and normally soothing voice of Spencer Reid made her jump out of her thoughts.

Sighing, Y/N smiled her fakest smile. “Good morning, Y/N/N. Good morning, Spence. What can I do ya for?” She held the whole conversation by herself, earning an annoyed glare from her best friend. “I don’t know what he was doing here, I didn’t even notice him.”

“I thought you were a good detective,” Spencer quipped, and though Y/N knew he was only teasing, it actually stung a bit.

“What are you doing here, Dr. Reid?” she asked, allowing her tone to showcase just how pissed off she was.

Spencer’s features softened. “Can you come with us? We gotta convince Detective Hyde that we wanna arrest my dad.”

“Don’t you need a good detective for that?” she shot back and swiveled in her chair, away from him.

She heard him sigh before he turned her chair around again. His eyes glazed over ever so slightly as he crouched down to her level. The flashbacks from her childhood returned for a quick second. “I’m sorry, Y/N/N. That was uncalled for. Please, will you help me?”

“Get up,” she whispered, not wanting to be reminded of the guy in the playground again. “Please, Spence. Get up.” Confused, Spencer stood up straight again before Y/N took a breath and got up, too.

“Are you okay, Y/N?” Derek asked, worry laced in his eyes.

She offered them a smile. “Fine. Let’s go.”

Allowing Spencer to sit down in front of Detective Hyde, Y/N and Derek remained by the door. Spencer explained the entire case to the detective, handing over the file they had compiled.

“You’ve got no evidence,” Hyde concluded.

“A suspect can be detained for questioning for forty-eight hours, regardless of evidence,” Spencer told him.

Hyde glanced up to Y/N and Derek before turning his focus back on Spencer. “I’m not in the habit of ruining people’s reputations on a whim.”

“Where’s your Captain? I want to talk to your Captain,” Spencer stated.

“Talk all you want,” Hyde chided. “This was a local murder and your authority ends at the state line.”

Crossing her arms in front of her chest, Y/N said, “Mine doesn’t.”

Detective Hyde glared at his co-worker before getting up and taking a seat on the edge of his desk. “Look, why don’t you just head back over to the Fountainview, and have a couple of drinks by the pool, and think about this?”

“I have thought about this,” Spencer stated determinedly.

“The guy’s your father.”

“What’s your point, Detective?”

“Maybe you’re here to work out some other issues…” Spencer got up just as Derek approached the two of them, pushing past his co-worker.

“Listen, Detective–”

Derek started, but Y/N was quick to cut him off. “Give us twenty-four hours, Hyde. Consider it a personal favor to the FBI, huh? Don’t you want to be in these guys’ good books? Don’t you wanna be the grand local hero?”

Y/N and Hyde had a stand-down for a good minute. Her Y/E/C eyes didn’t defer from his for even a split second. She was going to get to him, even if it cost her her job.

“Fine. You’ve got twenty-four hours.”

Smiling, Y/N patted his shoulder. “Thank you, good Detective.”

“I appreciate that,” said Derek before turning on his heel and following after Spencer, who quickly burst out of the office. “Reid, you’ve got to keep your head, man,” Derek said to the young agent just as Y/N joined them.

“He could’ve just agreed to it, it happens all the time.”

“They just want to feel like they’re the ones in control,” Derek assured him right before his phone rang. Spencer took this as an opportunity to walk away, only for his best friend to follow right after him.

“You okay, Spence?” she asked, worry laced in her voice.

He smiled at her. “Yeah. Could ask you the same thing. What was that earlier?”

“You pissed me off,” she snapped, crossing her arms over her chest as if that would protect her from the truth.

Shaking his head, he stepped closer towards her and placed his hands on her shoulders. “No, not that. When I crouched down in front of you. You flinched. You-your eyes glazed over as though you were gonna cry and you tensed up.”

“I-I guess I’ve been having some–flashbacks from our childhood?” she stuttered and stumbled over her words, not even sure what to make of it herself.

Spencer’s head tilted. “From our childhood? And it’s making you scared of me?”

“No, I–” before she could say anything, Rossi walked into the hallway they were in, intervening in their conversation.

“Your dad’s here,” he said.

The two of them joined Rossi and Derek when they had William Reid in the interrogation room. “You still think he did it, don’t you?” Derek asked Spencer.

“Why shouldn’t I?”

“Well, for one thing, Gary Michaels fits the profile,” Derek answered. Hearing the name caused Y/N to shiver ever so slightly. “You okay, mama?” Y/N simply nodded her head in response, allowing Derek to continue. “For another, he fled town after Riley’s murder. He’s a better suspect than your dad, Reid.”

Spencer’s nose scrunched. “He’s a convenient one. Someone slipped the file under my door, Morgan. What am I supposed to think?”

“Maybe they’re trying to help,” Rossi chimed in.

“Or maybe they’re trying to protect him,” Spencer suggested.

Rossi stepped closer to Spencer. “You’re talking about someone helping to cover up the murder of a child. Who would do that?”

Something clicked inside Y/N’s mind as she watched her best friend’s father through the glass. He didn’t strike her to be someone who would murder a child. He was the one person she hated most when she was a kid, but he didn’t seem to be the one to do the hating. Along with the flashbacks she’d been having and the things Hyde was saying mere moments ago, it didn’t make sense to her that Spencer’s dad would be behind this.

“Didn’t it seem a little odd how resistant Hyde was when you asked him to bring in your father?” she asked Spencer, voicing her thoughts.

Derek looked at her. “I know you hate the guy, but are you seriously accusing a cop right now?”

“It was a police file,” Spencer said, agreeing with his best friend.

“A very old one. Anybody could’ve accessed it. You too, Y/N/N.”

Y/N scoffed. “Aside from that…” she turned back to Spencer. “He told you to go back to the Fountainview, have a drink by the pool, and think about things. Have you told them you were staying at the Fountainview, Spence?”

Her best friend looked at her in thought. “No, I haven’t. Have you?”

“Uh-uh,” she shook her head and watched as the gears behind his eyes began working him up. “How bad of a detective am I now, huh?”

“You’re brilliant,” he whispered before walking past her and entering the interrogation room where his dad was.

Beaming, Y/N turned to Derek. “I’m brilliant,” she cooed, proudly.

“And you’re still trying to convince me you’re not in love with him?” Derek asked, smug smirk on his face.

Not really having a retort to that, Y/N pulled a face before turning to the window to listen to Spencer interviewing his father.

“The question is simple. How did the blood get on the clothes?”

William looked up at his son. “I told you, I’m not going to talk without counsel.”

“You don’t have anything to hide, you don’t need a lawyer.”

As Y/N watched Spencer interview his father, she felt weird. Something didn’t add up. William was hiding something from them. Detective Hyde was not trying to help them but protecting someone else and Lou Jenkins had been at the precinct for God-knows what reason. Diana told them he’d gotten to her and that he could’ve gotten Spencer, but William had never laid a hand on Y/N, which meant she wasn’t talking about William.

“Did you hear from Garcia on Michaels’ whereabouts?” Y/N asked Derek.

He shook his head. “No, why?”

“I have a weird feeling about this,” she murmured.

Nodding his head, Derek reached for his phone. “I’ll check up on them now,” he said and walked out of the room. It didn’t take very many minutes for him to return and call Spencer away from his interview.

“Gary Michaels is dead,” Derek told them what his boss, Hotch, had told him.

Y/N felt weak in her knees upon hearing the news. The hairs on the back of her neck raised while the feeling of fingertips grazing her skin left her feeling nauseous.

“Y/N/N, you okay?” Spencer asked as he guided her into a chair.

Y/N shook her head as tears lined her eyes. “Your mother said he’d gotten to me, Spence. It was Gary… He’s the guy that –” A sob shook her entire body, keeping the words from coming out of her. “He’s– He–” she tried over and over again, failing every time.

“Hey, hey, Y/N/N, look at me,” Spencer placed both hands on her face, forcing her to look at him. “You’re gonna be okay. Tell us what happened.”

She sniffled. “I can’t. I-I can’t.”

“Okay, that’s okay,” Spencer whispered before looking up at his co-workers. “Let’s bring her home–”

“No,” she quickly interrupted and grasped his hands from her face. “I don’t wanna go home. I don’t wanna be alone.”

Spencer’s thumb caressed her hands. “You got to rest, Y/N/N. Where do you wanna go?”

“I wanna come with you.”

“Sweetheart, I don’t think that’s a good idea right now,” said Derek. “Where else does she feel safe?”

With one glance at his best friend, Spencer knew where to bring her. “With my mom.”

As simple as that answer was, it was even simpler bringing her there. Y/N found Diana on the couch in the communal living room, leafing through an old photo book.

“Hi, mama,” Y/N greeted, hoping she wouldn’t see how puffy her eyes were or how scared she was. Diana looked up and smiled at the girl she considered her own daughter. “Can I sit with you?”

She nodded and patted the spot beside her, showing the pictures in the book on her lap. “Do you remember this?” she asked, showing her a picture of her and Spencer at the beach, sharing an ice cream. “It was the first time the two of you were allowed to have big-kids ice creams. You were so excited about it, you got most of it on your face and body.”

Smiling at the memory, Y/N traced a finger across the laminated photo. Immediately, she felt a hundred times better. Coming here, visiting Diana, always made her feel better, no matter how shitty her day had been.

“Sorry to interrupt,” the doctor spoke as he joined the two. “Can I talk to Diana?”

“Sure,” Y/N whispered and got up, but Diana quickly stopped her.

“Whatever you have to say, you can say it in front of her.” Y/N looked at the woman in surprise as she plopped back down. “She’s family.”

The doctor sighed and took a seat on the coffee table so he was in front of Diana. “I’m told you’re refusing medication.” Y/N blinked at Diana in surprise.

“I’m just holding off for a little while, if you don’t mind,” Diana told her doctor.

“You know what will happen,” the Doctor warned her calmly.

Diana nodded her head. “Tremors, panic, and the voices,” she summed up, having memorized it all. “But before that, when the fog lifts, a window of clarity. And I really need that right now.”

“I can give you some latitude here. Just tell me why,” said the Doctor.

Bowing her head down, Diana sighed. “I wanna remember,” she said solemnly, reaching for Y/N’s hand to squeeze it as she looked at the picture of her son, his best friend, her mother and herself. All four of them. Happy as Larry.

“Diana, does this have anything to do with Spencer and what we’ve been asking you about?” Y/N asked, squeezing her hand.

She looked at Y/N, her eyes softening with tears in her eyes. “I need to remember, Y/N/N. I need to remember who it was that got to you.” Her free hand went up to the young woman’s cheek, cupping it. Melting into the familiar touch, Y/N leaned into her hand, allowing her own tears to flow.

“Shall I stay here with you until you remember?” Diana simply nodded her head in response and Y/N smiled before the two of them returned to the picture book after having thanked Diana’s doctor.

It took a couple of hours, but the window of Diana’s memory started widening and brightening. She told Y/N it was time and, along with the doctor, she brought the woman she considered her second mother to the precinct where she told Hyde to bring them to Spencer.

“Agent Reid,” Detective Hyde said as soon as he opened the door.

Spencer turned and with a booming voice, he yelled, “Do not interfere with this interrogation, Detective. This is not your case anymore.”

“Spence,” Y/N murmured softly, appearing from behind Hyde with his mother’s hand in hers.

“Spencer, it was me,” Diana told him. Spencer's eyes flitted from his mother to his father to his best friend before he finally made the decision to hear his mother out first. They headed into Detective Hyde’s office where his father perched against the desk and Spencer grabbed two chairs. One for his mother and one for Y/N. He himself took a seat on the sofa.

“I’d seen him around,” Diana started. “At your ball games. At the park. You used to play chess there, do you remember?” Spencer softly nodded his head. “You played with him once.”

“With Gary Michaels?” A shiver went down Y/N’s spine.

Diana’s hand squeezed Y/N’s in reassurance. “I didn’t know that was his name back then,” Diana admitted. “But it wasn’t unusual for you to play with adults. And you’d win, too. I’d only started to grow concerned when I noticed him around Y/N/N. He – uhm,” Diana halted, unable to get the words across her lips.

“Did he do something to us?” Spencer asked, worried eyes flitting over towards the Y/H/C girl with the tears streaming down her face.

“Not to you, no,” Diana whimpered, squeezing Y/N’s hand tighter.

Spencer leaned forward, wanting to crouch in front of his best friend, but then refrained and returned back to his seat, remembering how she reacted to that the other day. “Y/N/N… You remember what happened to you, don’t you?”

Nodding her head, Y/N cried out. “He touched me, Spence. I-I suppressed the memory for as long as I could remember, but-but when I saw his mugshot, I just… I suppose the memory just flooded back into my mind.”

“He was inappropriate with Y/N/N, he looked at you like he wanted to do the same thing to you. I just couldn’t let it happen…” Diana continued, holding onto Y/N’s hand.

“A mother knows,” Spencer recited something Diana had told him mere days ago. Diana nodded her head. “So, you told Riley’s dad?”

Diana heaved in a deep breath. “Two nights later, Lou called the house. He was agitated. He said he needed me to meet him. We went to stake out his house, Gary’s. He was bringing out the garbage when Lou asked me if that was him. He told me that that was Gary Michaels and that he had a history with kids… I-He then told me to go, but I didn’t listen. He got out and I-I sat there, I couldn’t move. It was like a dream, that paralysis in the face of something terrible.”

“What happened after that?” Spencer asked.

Clearing her throat, Diana bowed her head. “It’s okay, Diana,” William encouraged, placing a hand over Y/N’s and Diana’s locked hands. “Go on.”

“At some point I found myself walking towards the house. I found Lou hovering over Gary’s bloodied body… And the rest… It’s all dark after that.”

“You came home,” William continued for her and turned to his son. “She couldn’t talk at first, but eventually I came to understand what had happened, and I knew that nobody could ever know.”

“So you never told anyone?” Y/N asked, voice meek and fragile.

William shook his head. “No, she could have been implicated. And I had to protect her.”

With teary eyes, Spencer looked up at Y/N before moving to his father. “You were burning her bloody clothes,” he stated.

Both Diana and Will nodded their heads. “But the knowing, you can’t burn that away,” William said. “It changed everything.”

“Is that why you left?” Spencer asked his dad.

“I tried to keep us together, Spencer, I swear to you, but the weight of that knowledge was… It was too much.”

Y/N looked at Spencer. His bottom lip was quivering whilst the gears behind his eyes were working overtime. “You could’ve come back,” he eventually told his dad. “We could have started over.”

“I didn’t know how to take care of you any more,” he said to Spencer before turning to Y/N. “And I didn’t know how to approach you, knowing –” Will quickly stopped himself before he could burst into tears. “When I lost that confidence, there was no going back.”

“What’s done is done,” said Diana without a single ounce of resentment before turning back to her son. “At least now you know the truth… Both of you.” She squeezed Y/N’s hand again.

Spencer stared down at his hands for a couple of seconds and Y/N knew he was fighting back tears. “I was wrong about everything. I’m sorry,” he squeeked.

Getting up from his spot against the desk, William went to sit next to Spencer. “Me too, Spencer.”

A small smile spread across Y/N’s lips as she sniffled. After everything that had happened, she was glad Spencer got some kind of closure with his dad. And, above all, she felt the hatred she’d harbored for William Reid all these years, lift from her heart. Everything he did was to protect his family.

“So,” Diana then said, lifting Y/N’s hand and placing a kiss on it. “I believe these two have a couple of things they need to discuss.” She motioned to the youngest ones in the room. “Plus, I need to be back in my room before curfew.”

With a smile, Y/N blew the woman a kiss. “I’ll visit you tomorrow, mama.”

“See you next time, mom,” said Spencer as he got up and kissed his mother goodbye.

With that, Diana and William left the office, leaving Y/N and Spencer to their own devices. Y/N was watching the two leave with a smile on her face, not even noticing Spencer staring at her until he captured her attention.

“Hey,” he said in a whisper. Y/N looked up at him. “Come here.” He patted the spot beside him.

Y/N moved from her spot on the chair to the couch where Spencer grabbed her hands and kissed her knuckles. “Are you okay?” she asked, cupping his face with her hands right after he kissed them.

“Yeah. Yeah, I think I’m gonna be,” he replied. “Are you?”

Heaving in a deep breath, she let go of his face and dropped her hands in his lap where he grasped them again. “I suppressed those memories for so long and now I have to digest them all over again… It’s gonna be a lot of therapy.”

“Do you want me to go with you?” he asked, lifting her hands again to kiss them.

Y/N shook her head. “No, I think they might need you in Quantico,” she said with a smile and wriggled one hand out of his grip to push back a strand of hair. This time, she didn’t feel too awkward doing it.

“Actually, I was thinking you could come with me to D.C.?” Y/N perked up at this news. “I-I talked to Hotch earlier and he, uhm, he’d like you to come in for a few, like, trial days at the BAU… Only if you want to, of course. I-I don’t expect you to give your life up here to fly with me to Virginia and just throw your life upside down. I just–”

“Spence,” Y/N interrupted him with a chuckle. “I’d love to go with you. With you gone, there’s nothing keeping me here.”

Spencer let out an amused scoff as he looked at her. For a moment, it was just that; him looking at her, her looking right back. His eyes glimmered the way they always did when he looked at her. After all these years, it still made her feel like she was the only girl in the world.

“Spence,” she started in a whisper, “I–” Before she could even begin her sentence, a pair of soft lips shut her right up. At first, she was surprised, but she quickly melted into the kiss and let it completely overtake her senses.

“I know,” he whispered when he pulled back. “Me too.” With a smile on her face, she kissed him again, only for him to pull back after a few seconds. “You did wanna tell me you’re in love with me right? Otherwise I probably read this situation very wrong.”

Giggling, Y/N kissed him again. “I’ve been in love with you since we were sixteen, Spence. You can be so dumb sometimes,” she told him between kisses, some of the words getting lost in his mouth.

“Actually, it’s just that I–” Before the man could go off on a rant about statistics and scientific facts, Y/N quickly shut him up by kissing him again.

After everything that had happened, this was not the ending Y/N had expected for her and Spencer, but she was happy that it was.

“Are you sure they’re gonna like me?” Y/N mumbled as Spencer dragged her down the hospital corridors on the way to his co-worker, JJ’s room. He’d told her she had just given birth to a baby boy while they were in Vegas and it was the first thing they were going to do when they landed back in Virginia.

It also meant it was the first time his co-workers, and Y/N’s new co-workers, were going to meet her in real life.

Spencer chuckled and pulled at her hand so that she’d fall into his chest and he could kiss her passionately. “Yes, I am sure,” he told her when he pulled away. “Oh, we’re here,” he said, pointing at the room number.

He rapped two times on the doorpost, capturing everyone’s attention in the room. “You guys have room for two more in here?” he asked, smiling at his colleagues, especially as they looked at him with confusion in their eyes.

Pulling Y/N with him, he entered the room with a smile.

“Spence, hi,” the blonde in the hospital bed greeted with a smile.

“Welcome back,” the tall guy they had landed next to said to Spencer before his eyes landed on Y/N. “You must be Y/N Y/L/N,” he said, holding out his hand for her to shake, which she did by letting Spencer go for a second. “Aaron Hotchner, but everyone calls me Hotch.”

“Nice to meet you, Hotch,” Y/N said, grinning from ear to ear.

Spencer then turned to the little one in the room. “Wow,” he said before his eyes landed on the father. “Congratulations.” He reached out his hand to shake.

“How is it that I just went through fifteen hours of labor and you look worse than I do?” JJ asked, a hint of worry in her voice.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Spencer muttered. “You look beautiful.”

Y/N simply nodded her head in agreement at the sentiment. With one glance at her boyfriend, JJ wordlessly told him something the rest of the visitors didn’t quite catch onto.

“Well, I could sure use some coffee. Anyone else?” he asked.

Everyone agreed and filed out of the room, one by one. When Y/N made a move to follow, catching onto JJ wanting to be alone with Spencer, he pulled her back to his side. “You better not think about leaving my side.”

Y/N shot a fleeting glance at JJ to check if she was okay with it. Judging by the smile on her face, the Y/H/C stayed put.

“Are you okay?” JJ asked as Y/N nudged him to move a little closer.

“Yeah, yeah. You?”

“Yeah, yeah. You sure? Because there’s something I wanted to ask you, but it can wait.”

Feeling her heart leaping in her throat, Y/N tried her hardest to contain her excitement. She already knew where this was going.

“What is it?” he asked, brows furrowing ever so slightly.

JJ smiled and looked down at the baby in her arms. “Will and I were talking, and uh, we want you to be Henry’s godfather.”

An excited squeal erupted from Y/N’s throat, causing Spencer to look back at her in surprise. “I don’t even know. I don’t know…” he stuttered and stumbled, his eyes flicking back and forth from JJ to Y/N and back.

“Here, do you want to hold him?” she asked, already holding out the newborn for him to take. “It’s okay, here you go.”

A little hesitantly, Spencer took the baby from his friend. “Oh, hi, Henry,” he cooed.

“If something were to happen to us, it’s up to you and Garcia to make sure this boy gets into Yale,” JJ joked.

Spencer puffed. “Yale. Yale. Do you wanna go to Yale, Henry?” he asked the baby as though he could answer.

With a chuffed smile, Y/N joined Spencer’s side again. “That was your godfather’s safety school.” Spencer’s honey eyes met her Y/E/C ones in surprise before he turned back to the baby.

“Don’t worry, I can get you into CalTech with one phone call,” he whispered to him like it was a secret.

As Spencer looked at the baby in his arms, he couldn’t help but forget the stress he had felt in the past couple of days. If something so small and fragile could be in his arms without breaking, something JJ trusted him with, he was certain nothing else could touch him anymore.

Especially not with his best friend by his side.

Everything taglist: @calamitykaty@littlemissaddict@n0wornever@wanniiieeee@unnowhatthisistbh

#spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x fem!reader #criminal minds #spencer reid fanfic

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