#Please never ever change you sweet chaotic noodle.

[snowdice]

Tea: Just Tea (Cuffed Universe)

Relationships: Janus/Patton (kinda ambiguous/future romantic), Patton & Roman (background) Janus & Roman (background)

Characters: Patton, Janus

Summary: Detective Janus Lial meets with Patton Heart for tea. Just like he does every week.

Notes: A missing child case is mentioned.

This is a Cuffed Universe fic.

Previous fics in this series:

Tea, Cookies, and Handcuffs

Matboards and Subway Sandwiches

Espionage and Iced Coffee

Popcorn and Podcasts

Rats, Pizza, and Supply Closets

Kisses and Thai Noodle Leftovers

Road Trips, Chicken Parmesan, and Handcuffs: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8

Extras:

Moving Day

Police Statements

Virgil’s Many Jobs: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

The door was stupid, Janus thought not for the first time. Without fail, the thought had crossed his mind every single week in the brief moments he stood in front of it. It did not matter that the door had gone through multiple paint changes since the first time he’d knocked on it. It was always stupid and ugly.

Currently, the door was painted a bright yellow with little white flowers hand painted all over it. He noticed that some of the lower flowers were much messier (though he could almost read the enthusiasm that contributed to their creation in their petals). Each flower had a stupid little smiley face drawn on it.

Janus knew the design would change within the month and it would be just as stupid. The only thing that ever stayed the same about the door was the mid rail. The strip in the middle of the door was always painted baby blue. When Janus had first come here there were two handprints on it, relatively fresh. Now there were three, two old and chipping and one only about a year old.

Janus leaned on his cane and waited in front of the door, though he didn’t have to wait long. He was expected after all. The door swung open only a few moments after he’d knocked, just long enough to get from the house’s kitchen to the front door.

“Hello Detective,” the man who answered the door said even though he often didn’t use Janus’s title anymore. Patton usually just used his first name. However, these first interactions every week were a well-worn pattern now. Janus may as well have been watching a recording of the first few times they’d interacted over and over every week. “Please come in.”

Janus obeyed the request, removing his hat as he stepped through the stupid decorated door.

“Would you like some tea?” Patton asked, heading back towards the kitchen without a glance back. He trusted Janus to know his way by now.

“Sure,” Janus agreed, though it honestly didn’t feel like a choice anymore. It was part of the script. It would be wrong to refuse.

Janus followed him into the kitchen and took a seat at the table without invitation. Patton puttered about his kitchen grabbing sugar and cream for the tea.

Patton’s kitchen table was quite large, but always felt cramped. Patton liked to do all of his daily tasks at the kitchen table from paperwork to crafts to reading. Yet, instead of putting the objects used for each activity away when he was done with them, he simply switched seats and started up his next task there. The result was that the 8-person table had barely enough room for a plate and cup in front of two of its chairs. (If Janus was lucky that week.)

The tablecloth was as chaotic as the mess atop it. Janus was almost glad he’d never seen the multicolored ugly thing in its entirety. He knew there were (at least) three sets of novelty salt and pepper shakers hidden among the balls of yarn and stacks of papers. There was a dinosaur set, a set that looked like science flasks, and a pair of flowering cacti. Considering two people lived in this house, it seemed a bit excessive.

The only decoration choice Janus felt he could approve of was the arrangement of daises and sweet peas in a vase. The flowers were always fresh from Patton’s shop, and even though he had no eye for color in any other aspect of design, he did know how to design a good bouquet.

Patton was back with the tea so quickly that Janus was sure it had already been steeping by the time he’d knocked. Janus could smell the familiar blueberry scent before the tea was even poured.

“Is there any news?” Patton asked as he poured the tea, though Janus knew he knew the answer already.

It was part of their script, but it was never any easier to answer. “No,” Janus said. “Not this week. I’m sorry.”

Patton did not respond. He never did. How was someone supposed to respond to that? Instead, he finished pouring both cups of tea in silence.

Janus cleared his throat as Patton settled down in his seat. He’d found Patton had a hundred solutions ready to dispel almost any awkward silence or social misstep. This awkward silence, this heavy silence, however, was always Janus’s responsibility to break. “How’s Roman?”

The topic brought a small smile to Patton’s lips. “He’s good,” he replied. “I’ll have to pick him up from school in an hour and a half.”

Janus knew. This meeting was the same time every week. He wondered if they’d change the time of it when Roman eventually left elementary school for middle school and his dismissal time changed. It would be strange. They’d been meeting at this time long before Roman.

“He wants to take ballet,” Patton continued.

“That’s new,” Janus said. Janus had picked the kid up from school last Friday and there hadn’t been any mention of that. (And with Roman there would have been a mention of it.) “Are you going to let him?”

Patton shrugged. “Probably, but I’ll only buy him a couple of lessons. Knowing him, he’ll lose interest within the week.”

“Roman can be a bit flighty,” Janus said, a fond smile on his face.

“Eh, I think most kids are like that,” Patton replied. There was a moment of silence as the man took a sip of his tea.

Janus… did not understand how he did this. He did not understand the decorated door or the elementary school worksheet left on the table. He couldn’t comprehend the new child sized shoes when there were old ones in the attic.

Janus had been the one to bring Roman to Patton, desperate and knowing only one person who was a parent. He’d hated himself for asking at the time. He could never have anticipated how Patton had opened up to the child.

How had the man cleaned out his old office to make room for a child’s bedroom when another childhood bedroom’s door remined shut tight next door? Janus didn’t think he’d ever know even though he’d witnessed it himself.

Janus did not know how Patton kept living. He did not know how he’d managed to be a dad again (and a very good one at that).

Janus had met him as the detective assigned to the missing persons case for the man’s first child. It had broken Patton in a thousand ways Janus couldn’t even begin to comprehend. Janus had watched it happen, had seen the moment he was informed his child was missing. He’d watched all the moments after that too.

Yet, somehow, despite being shattered, he was still here.

Janus had always admired that about him. It was what drew him back every week without fail to drink the same hot tea even as the case he was here for grew impossibly colder every time.

At one point there had been updates every time they’d met (never good ones). Then there had been an update every month. Then every few months. Now it felt like Janus had been telling him there were no updates for an eternity. The time he would continue to do so stretched into eternity before him.

Yet, Janus knew he would keep coming here even though he was technically off the case now. Everyone was technically off the case now.

“Well,” Janus said. “If Roman decides to stick with ballet, let me know. I’ll buy him the right shoes.”

Patton smiled at him warmly. “Thanks.”

If there was even a chance that Janus might one day have an update for Patton on the whereabouts of Logan Heart, it would all be worth it.

[cultivatxr]

@justapeskyninja​ whispered: "No, these are perfect if you say they are." Who else to buy flowers from. Curious holiday, well maybe tacky if anything from all the commercialized decorations and the like she's seen, but she's more than happy to buy flowers for the purpose of giving them to friends. Starting with her only favorite flower girl after all once giving them back to her after pink ribbon as tied around the small bouquet, "Happy Valentine's Day~”

Trust Yuffie to do her proud. There’s something delightfully offhanded about being gifted her own flowers, but at the same time, it meant her regal friend had paid attention to her non-too-discreet lamentations in years prior. Truthfully Aerith needed the business, and while flowers from any source (or indeed any gift for that matter) would still be cherished and appreciated, the very fact the pint sized Wutaian had managed to both support and reward her in the same breath, well, that was just poetic justice in it’s own right. 

Tickled somewhat by the irony, those bright green eyes scrunched at the edges as she laughed brightly and kindly, the warmth of genuine mirth and camaraderie reinforcing the friendship she knew to be so true. It may indeed be an over commercialised hype fest, but it didn’t make her any less giddy to be remembered and treated all the same. Without an ounce of ceremony, the ancient beamed, the snake of a slender arm around the mischief maker’s shoulders roping her in for a warm and uncharacteristically firm hug. 

❝You’re an actual treasure, do you know that?❞ An unspoken thank you lay amidst her words, earnest and sincere and entirely without expectation. It begged a return of the favour, and while not nearly so unpredictable, a solitary but vibrant flower found itself plucked from her bouquet and tucked neatly behind Yuffie’s ear. ❝Happy Valentine’s. ❞

[shiro-0197]

aw shiro, my love, don't worry about it!! i only hope you're okay and safe :d please only reply when you're free, and don't feel bad about it!! >:(

my day yesterday was okay, i've just been relaxing, and studying occasionally. went out to explore a nearby town too, it's so pretty there. and much colder (since it's a highlands) of course!! Today was great too. I bought doughnuts (they're amazing?? I love doughnuts), and I had instant ramen, but it was SO spicy I nearly died. (Three bottles of water later, because someone finished all the milk in the household *cough* me *cough*) and I'm still just reeling. Sucks having such low spice tolerance HAHA. I'm listening to some old school hip-hop rn, while typing this out :D how were your two days?

here are some i'll be using to teach english :d and that would honestly be much appreciated, he's getting on my last nerve rn. (I included the first few, what do you think?)

thats such a priceless feeling i so totally agree. you're so precious 🥺🥺 i'm sure they're prouder thank you imagine. you're so dedicated!! i'm sure all that extra research you've done will definitely pay off. it's good that you know what the job is roughly like, so you'll be really prepared when you finally do start it. you know that one scene, in the 2nd season of the great pretender? when the chinese mafia boss emphasizes the importance of a translator in literally everything? (like that book award example) i may be getting the thing muddled up, but i found that so cool. like yeah, a book or speech could be absolutely beautiful, but if everyone can't enjoy it due to it being a different language, it would be such a shame. i just find translators really important. sorry, i'm really dorky haha 🥺🥺

awww but i think your personality type is wonderful. a lot of my favourite characters are intj (they're all so precious istg grrrr) yes!! i was in a tooru brainrot yesterday too 😭😭😭 (saw a bunch of couples on my walk, and I was like "if only Tooru was real grrrr") and yes?? there'd be so much to learn from each and every one of them. dedication from hinata, savage lines from tsukki, kindness from yams/yachi, how to be a dork 101 from atsumu. aaaah 😭😭i'm sorry they're all so wonderful.

No pftttt I totally feel you. I saw some people without masks today and I was like "bro wtf" and just really loudly said "I sure hope everyone starts following the rules so the cases don't increase" because I'm a lil bitch like that xD

awww okay!! I'll definitely keep that in mind. Mayo makes everything better, tbh >.< aww that's understandable! I don't have specific preferences but hearing the phrase "soggy cheese" makes me want to cry somewhere :( I don't like nuts in chocolate. I'm very passionate about that? XD ikr??

I'm surprised too, I usually never pass on murder, but I guess you're just special like that 👉👈 sir I'd get married to you as many times as you'd like 😼 oops sorry for being cheesy, but—you like cheese ;)

U

I won't ask why, don't worry. Since I kinda feel the same about Malaysia tbh. It's a love hate relationship, I think HAHA but yeah 😣😣 i don't look up to US at all, and it sucks because people generally do. And I'm just like ;-; why (no offense to Americans tho lol)

is that even legal omg they're so chaotic?? XD how cute tho. Angel does stuff like that all the time too, but I'd never know that when I first met her (she has the most perfect exterior, and then when you get to know her; she's the biggest dork) Schools opening on the 20th, I can't wait to see her then :] (I can, however, wait for the exams which are scheduled for the 25th ugh)

peanut butter is indeed yellow, not up for discussion hehe :) here's my favourite hues!! I love gentle, soft hues like these (pastels) , for yellow; I don't have a favourite. they're all wonderful

ahhh no that's so precious of you!! :)) I'm smiling rn.

yeah skdhskdjsk I'M JUST SO GRRR. Whenever someone goes "hey Ari can you ______" and we both respond?? The tension?? In the air?? Bro skdjskks. 😔🤚 You share a name with one of the most precious characters too tho!!;

This is Shiro from Voltron hehe. I love him so much, just like I love you (tho I'm sure we both know I love you more <3)

I share a name with a book character. His name is Aristotle Mendoza, but his crush-turned-boyfriend calls him "Ari" (which has been my nickname since I was 12). Reading it for the first time was the BEST feeling ever. It's also my favourite book, "Aristotle and Dante discover the secrets of the universe".

—Ari :D (no pfttt I love the tag so much. I have my own tag, that's like the best thing ever 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺)

Heyyy I'm so sorry for answering so late!! I know you said not to apologize but..... well hmm no excuse I just feel like apologizing, but either way thank you for your patience!!♡ This is the third time I'm rewriting this, and this time I'm doing this in my notes because fuck it😔

Im glad to hear that!! Highlands are always so pretty. Wish we had those here, but it's only steppe here:( Boring~ ooh, donuts!!! They're really good. I havent much, but I tried them like 3 times and they're so good. I really hope I will get to eat more<3 also WHAT'S THOSE NOODLES' NAME I WANNA KNOW- Are you feeling okay now, though? XD

My days were nice!!! Felt as if I had been hiding three bodies, but I've been feeling better lately. We had online school yesterday so I'm excused from the errands for the half of the day, thankfully. But your messages make me very happy. Though I dont always feel like writing a response (or I get stressed because it doenst save) so very sorry for that😔

Ohh those look so pretty!! I'd totally join to just look at them. The colors are so nice🥺 it looks like one of our olympiad prep slides, though better. I dont have the screenshots sadly😩 Either way I really love the little details like the squiggly thingies or the Ж .... they seem unnecessary but the energy changes a lot without them hehe

I really hope they will be🥺 that'd mean a lot to me. And I'm also really hopeful itll work out. I really don't wanna disappoint my family, which is literally just one person. The less people there are, the more it hurts, you know?

Yeah, that scene meant so much to me!! I dknt remember much, but I was very happy they said something like that, because I've been told being a translator wont work out for me. Now look at me, I'm about to tell them to fuck themselves<3 I was also so surprised to see Laurent know that many languages ..... I aspire to be like him😩 And honestly, I havent though so deep of that but you opened my eyes and now I'm about to float off into the next universe😭 dont apologize though, its very cute!!!��︎♥︎

Heheh, I guess you're right.. every single anime INTJ is a silent sexy mastermind and I love them . ... YEAH every single time I see a passing couple i cry because I dont have anyone 😡💔 and sometimes when I see people doing something amusing (which includes people failing cuz I'm evil) I just imagine one of the characters doing that and I smile all the way xD Honestly, I'd sell my father on black market for a single day with one of them:( though that may sound like a really low price because his cigarette filled lungs wouldnt cost a lot... I sound like my 7th grade self again I'm so sorry

BAHQHHANEJWJD I HOPE THEY WERE EMBARRASED. I HOPE THEY FELT AWKWARD AND OTHER PEOPLE DID TOO, they deserve it. Like, learn your lesson bitch, it's been a year!

Yeah!!! I love mayo, not to the point where I would gulp it down from the package, but it does make dishes taste good. Same, soggy cheese on itself sounds like a dish served in the ninth circle of hell. You should try nuts in honey!! Like, just straight up dip them in honey. Sounds weird, and it doesnt always taste NEJFJKSKF (depends on the honey)but I think it's worth trying xD Walnuts are the best with honey I think

That was so funny ... TOO FUNNY, I LAUGHED FOR LIKE . 3MINUTES STRAIGHT and I do not laugh when I'm tired. You really are special 😭😭😭😭 cheesy ... HAHRNFJJSF

I'm so sorry for being a bully like that but it's so funny how you left a single U there . Its so mysterious, was it in purpose? Or were you lost in the excitement if messaging me?

I was one of those people, honestly 😭 but mostly because I wasnt aware of its political condition, I guess. Maybe theres more than just politics that's bad about US, but honestly, it has more opportunities than this hellfire. Though now I'm more into Norway and Japan. Really wanna travel there :(

Heheh, yeah, we never really show off to strangers at first. I dont know what exactly I mean by we, but you get my point ♡ Good luck though!! I hope it goes well for you<3

Oh they looks so pretty!! They're really wonderful. Like bubblegum and cotton candy and literally anything sweet... it's so cute !!! And I totally agree, there isnt a bad yellow.

HAHAH, honestly, that reminds me of how there were 4 people with the same name in my class, and whenever the teacher did the attendance thing, they would all stand up. Teachers usually dont say the last names, so we always gotta ask which person they mean if theres more than one person with that name, so yeah.. That happened on accident at first, but then they just did it for trolling xD

OH MY GOD HES SO PRETTY? HES SO PRECIOUS?? HUHHH??? I gotta thank Kuro for this wonderful opportunity of sharing a name with someone like .... him🥺

Oh that's so cool!! Also, he has a boyfriend ... I really need to start reading xD it's so cute though! It sounds like such a good book, I'm glad you share a name with him, hehe!!

I also share my real name with one of the characters in a kids' show, and its SO ugly, I'm in pain. Every time my friends see one of those on TV they go

Which is a pain in the ass, it's so embarrassing...........

Awh, okay!! I'm glad you love it, cuz I do too. Because it's your name.... cuz I love u. That was so lame PLEASEJWJDJSJF I HOPE YOUR DAY WAS GREAT !!! LOVE YOU

[stimmypaw]

stimmypaw reads the apprentice’s quest, a blog post

A big one, just a bunch of thoughts as I’m reading it, of course, lots of spoilers for the first book in the Warrior Cats series A Vision of Shadows. This will be covering just the first book tho, it’s all in the Read More, let’s gooooooo!!!!

Vision Of Shadows time

Lots of new cats!!! I don't remember these guys as kits or anything wrow!!! I like their names but itll take a while to get used to them

Also cant believe they printed stormcloud's dead name

Omg there's a cat named beepaw

I love these cats all of them so much im going 2 cry

All new names are perfect

I FORGOT HOW GORGEOUS THE CAT VIEW IN THE RECENT BOOKS WAS, LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT

I'm glad leafpool smokes weed

I love reading from Jayfeather's point of view, his grumpiness hasn't grown on me ever but thats just me, I still enjoy it lots he's great and its fun

Firestar and Leopardstar's characterizations are On Point i love it

OOF i feel so bad when jayfeather is mean to others, poor kestrelflight, I love those two

Lovely Jayfeather moments now its time for the first chapter

I like this duo! Also I didn't think I'd ever say this but shut up squirrelflight one can have fun AND learn with their mentors

Sparkkit sounds nice she makes jingling bell noises when she walks around

Alderkit is chadphobic /j

I can see Alderkit taking deep breaths to relax its rotating in my mind its beautiful

God this first chapter feels so good and comfortable, like eating noodles and chicken nuggets. I am so so deeply in love with it, its gorgeous!

Sparkkit is so perfect too, and Graystripe remembering Firestar aaaaaa

DUSTPELT SAID WHAT? PHDHAHAHHA OH NOOOO I don't remember their relationship much, must have been fun, I love young little creature squirrelflight I MISSED HER SO BAD WOW

I started reading the second chapter and died, I think ill take a break now 2 sleep heehhee

I love them describing twoleg stuff its always so fun and alien, like watching an animal planet show about funny sea creatures.

Also I have determined sparkpaw is my favorite, might be my favorite cat ever next to hollyleaf??? I really identify with her and also she's autistic i have decided that

Alderpaw baby noooo hhhh their mentor at least is trying to show its okay, he seems very emotionally distant so far and alderheart feels very emotionally needy, actually both of them do, did I mention I love Sparkpaw??? I might be imprinting myself 2 much on her

I love how like, its clear both of them are absolutely anxious and worried about others opinions on them, which is clearly something they got from being Firestar's grandkids, deputy kids and leader kids. And bramblestar too, I recall him being quite the anxious lad ahhah. Sparkpaw will be showing confidence and being loud but the second anyone isn't approving of her or she does something "wrong" she gets small and quiet, and she ended up setting a high bar for herself by being good at hunting and fighting so I'm curious to see how that will go. Also there's nothing wrong with being guided through a crowded place to meet others Sparkpaw!!! I bet the two of them would be stuck without not knowing how to talk to others had Needlepaw not shown up. I love them, my gf is mocking me saying I'm a Sparkpaw kinnie.

Apprentices will like learn about a thing and tell everyone about it all the time and assume its always true in every situation and thats valid I love kids like that. Also in my head Needlepaw kinda looks like a porcupine. Oh boo she's fatphobic >:(

I love apprentices they are so fun and silly, just making fun of the leaders like its nothing. The way they are clearly learning and absorving everything their warriors say and do like sponges its just ***chefs kiss***

Omg shadowclan is just full of 12 year olds help

And then the old person said "it sure is hard being old!" And everyone clapped

Shout-out to pretty Riverclan apprentice #481977 I love her

Leafpool: 👁👁

Alderpaw: I knew it im cursed and awful and terrible and I will never amount to anything

I wish the cats didn't seem to be giving up on him so easily though

Ah yes the classic thunderclan move "you suck, into the medicine hole you go"

The way sparkpaw changes the things she says and how she does when it isn't the status quo around her oooooooooooooyeaaaaaaa I love 1 autistic cat

Alderpaw considering your problems lesser than other cats won't help you deal with them better bro

I love Needlepaw's excitement about Alderpaw being a medicine cat apprentice, and her sarcasm, she feels like a preppy teenager

Ahhh this is so good, I am so thirsty for family moments like this, just Alderpaw bonding with grandma, I’ll definitely want to draw this one it’s so sweet.

Oh to be young and silly.

I really am enjoying like, Alderpaw’s struggles to seeing how he fits in the clan, how he fits in himself, how he wants to be seen and what he wants to be, it’s really good. I Am Engaged(tm) With This Plot.

SPARKPAW NOOOOOOO but also Yes I want her to be shown vulnerable and weak please 

POP, god watching this stuff always awful, the cats must have thought he broke her ahahah

Also, really great that they learned from Dovewing and now like leave choices and discussions about prophecies between adults

And plus Brambles seemed to take the time to explain stuff to him, seems he wont be going alone either the 1 thing is that he will be the only one knowing what the journey is really about, why though??? I didnt read Firestar's Quest or whatever why does Skyclan need to be secret??? Seems quite silly really!

YESSSS SANDSTORM GET HIS ASS FIGHT FIGHT LOVE THIS LOVE SANDSTORM

I could feel squirrelflight nearing explosion here, this was very fun, i wish they werent hiding this though!!!

The secret thing is showing to be a plot point so I am once again Very Engaged

Also, wonderful dialogue bit, someone asked Bramblestar why an Elder is going and:

Lovely perfect perfect

I miss you dovewing

SQUIRRELFLIGHT LOVE YOU

Oh boy this is it

Traveling book moment

Graystripe: Soooo you're excited to go on the journey to the old territories and Skyclan?

Sandstorm: Yes! It's been ages and-

Graystripe: I'm sure the tribe will love the visit too

Sandstorm, groaning: Oh noooo I forgot about how the tribe is in the way of every journeyyyyy noooooo they're such a racist caricature, please tell me you have a plan

Graystripe: Yes don't worry about it the writers forgot about the tribe in my comic book so you can just use the excuses i did to actively avoid it

Sandstorm: Oh thank Starclan

Sparkpaw's desperation to prove herself oof, her anxiety with understanding the prophecy, oh boy, and Alderpaw feeling too overwhelmed by the questions and not managing to talk!!!! I am so glad they are both autistic

Hoping "Being Leader" wont mean theyre putting nonsense responsibility on the apprentice again

Ah good Sandstorm is on the lead again, as she should, she should have been leader she would have been great

I can't believe Alderpaw thinks I look stupid and diseased :( /j

Everything about this twoleg scene was scandalous I loved it, Sparkpaw just toppled over a trash bag and they are eating from it, iconic, also did those twolegs throw out a whole turkey? Damn

Its not that Sparkpaw is freakishly good at hunting she is very hungry and constantly on the watch for things to eat

BRO Ive never been in a road where the drivers are this wild, throwing bottles out of the car????? Ive seen Fruit being thrown like once or twice, what the fuck!!! I'm glad they are going to wait until the morning to continue

Okay I was not expecting Needlepaw to show up this girl is chaotic I love her

ACTUALLY YEAH WHY DIDNT THEY TELL THE OTHER CLANS ABOUT THIS SINCE THE PROPHECY IS ABOUT ALL THE CLANS???

Needlepaw is like Rono from Bambi 2 if he wasnt a mean bully and thats very epic

Very curious character though, how come her mentor isnt teaching her the warrior code properly? Is that an issue with all apprentices?? Is the clan overwhelmed by 12 year olds and they won?

Having lots of fun trying to play the game "what animal are they describing this time" the erins made here, im glad they're in a farm. Worried about Sandstorm though :c

Fuck im worried about sandstorm a lot, her wound hurt on Me

Yeah water is good youre right sandstorm

Aw man I hope she's okay let her at least survive to meet skyclan please

NOOOOOOOO SANDSTORMA A AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Sandtteooonrjrbbbmmnnnnnnnnnn

I am so sad

Alderpaw denying it, Starclan shining upon their vigil, everything crushed me i cried

Alderpaw considers Nihilism

Haven't seen a cat thank starclan for prey in a while its

Oh look they time skipped a journey! They don't tend to do that thats nice

I'm so excited to be meeting The Skyclan that everyone in the fandom knows now

So far they seem kinda mean but thats most clans at first glance really

Okay somethings up

I uh have heard of Darktail pretty sure he's a bad guy so yeah something really bad happened to Skyclan

Am worried

Darktail sounds like an evil himbo* i may be enjoying him actually

*himbos are usually nice by default so he's just evil and stupid and strong

Does needletail know these cats already?????

Ah

Shit

Oh okay fuck

I've been quietly reading the rest because I am just concerned and I want them to be okay as quickly as possible

Waterfalls are a classic nice

Oh boy time for our unlikely duo of Alderpaw and Needlepaw to get out of a Mess!

I did not expect this to end up with the two of them journeying into parenthood, but I'm happy it did

Well actually I'm very unhappy theyre so lost and there's no sign of Skyclan I am very worried for everyone involved Sparkpaw must be feeling awful!

Twigkit is a great name

Yeah this ended terribly

Overall! Frigging loved it this book was GOOD and a great start for the series I am very excited to read the rest, SO WORRIED ABOUT SKYCLAN THO AAAA the characterizations were great the characters were great the pacing was fun and I didn't get bored once!

I think o only wish I had read this sooner really so I could look up others thoughts without getting heavily spoiled about the last books, I can watch a few videos already though thats a start ahhaha. But yeah it was great and it felt very good to read, haven't swallowed up a book so quickly in a very long time!!! Very happy I finally got my hands on this 💕💖💕💖💕💖 cant wait 2 start the next one

If you read all this, hope you had fun hahaha, ill be making more of these cus theyre fun and I like talking about warrior cats thats just my thing

Til next time

[returnn-of-the-mac]

Could you do the fluff alphabet for Edward Deegan? I really wish we could have gotten more of him in the game!

This one is interesting because I’ve never actually considered him as a possible romance like. Ever. But hey, it’s a cool new perspective and I’m all for that! Please enjoy! 😊

Fluff Alphabet: Edward Deegan

Activities: What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

When they have down time, Deegan likes to take Sole out. Bars, the Diamond City noodle stand, a walk by the water. It’s romantic, but it’s also a nice escape from the chaotic Cabot clan.

Beauty: What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

Deegan admires Sole’s courage and strength. They are tough and independent, and he appreciates that.

Comfort: How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

Deegan isn’t great at physical comforting (hugs, etc), but he knows exactly what to say to calm Sole down (he has plenty of experience from having to deal with the Cabots)

Dreams: How do they picture their future with their s/o?

Deegan would probably want to get married and move out. Maybe get a little place in one of the more rural settlements, or in Sanctuary.

Equal: Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

Sole and Deegan are equals.

Fight: Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

Deegan and Sole don’t fight too often, but it can be tough for Deegan to forgive when he feels hurt or betrayed.

Gratitude: How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

Deegan is extremely grateful that Sole went through the trouble of finding the sirum, finding Emogene, and killing Lorenzo for Jack.

Honesty: Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

No, they don’t have any secrets.

Inspiration: Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

Deegan wasn’t changed by Sole.

Jealousy: Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

Not really. He trusts Sole.

Kiss: Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

Deegan is surprisingly a good kisser. A little rough, but good.

Love Confession: How would they confess to their s/o?

It wouldn’t be anything too dramatic or over the top. It would be a short and sweet confession. Maybe a little awkward, but straight to the point.

Marriage: Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?

Yes, Deegan would like to get married someday. His proposal, like his love confession, would be simple and direct.

Nicknames: What do they call their s/o?

Deegan doesn’t use nicknames. He just calls Sole by their first name.

On Cloud 9: What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

Deegan isn’t super mushy, but he treats Sole kinder than he does most other people. He will display some soft PDA like hand holding. He’s also surprisingly chivalrous.

PDA:Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

Deegan isn’t really into PDA, but he’ll do some occasionally. He prefers keeping romance private.

Quirk: Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship.

Deegan is a great listener. He can listen to Sole vent for hours.

Romance: How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?

Deegan is not very romantic in public, but he is slightly more in private.

Support: Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?

Yes, Deegan does believe in Sole and will help them achieve their goals.

Thrill: Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

Deegan prefers routine.

Understanding: How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

Deegan is empathetic, and he knows exactly what to say to comfort Sole when they are having a hard time.

Value: How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?

Deegan although Deegan cares about his work and the Cabots, truly values this relationship.

Wild Card: A random Fluff Headcanon.

Deegan is a blanket hog.

XOXO: Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

Deegan isn’t supper affectionate, but he’ll kiss and cuddle for Sole. He only does it privately though.

Yearning: How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

When he misses Sole, Deegan focuses on his duties with the Cabots.

Zeal: Are they willing to go to great lenghts for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

Yes, Deegan would die for Sole.

[toomanyfamdom]

Not all love is physical

Messages for a special girl on a special day. @dannixy

To my chaos twin, 

When I first started on Tumblr, I thought, ‘no one is going to want to talk to me or like me. Shoot why did I do this?’. And that happened for the first few weeks I started. Those weeks were hard, I guess. I followed literally everyone and mostly posted for my own enjoyment. Then, you posted. You posted about some group chat with writers and to not be afraid to ask to join. Me being the lonely sap I was, I took a leap of faith and sent you my username. When the group chat was first formed, I was so scared. You all were so confidant and lovely, and just amazing people that I couldn’t believe were real. I never thought I could live up to the level that everyone set by their writing and personalities. Then I started talking to you, Danni. I have no idea what it was about, all I know is that we clicked. Something told me that you (and everyone else xx) were special and that I could always count on you. And from then on, I knew we were going to be good friends, maybe even family. You made it so easy and comfortable to just let go and be myself. You made me not worry what others thought of me and to just enjoy writing and not compare it to other works. I have only known you and the family for a short period of time, but honestly, it feels like we’ve been together for years. When I was having just an awful day you stepped up, and took control and calmed me down. Not even looking back once and basically dropped everything to help me, and that is truly amazing. I have never met you, which is obvious, but you have a heart of gold. You’re loyal, honest, funny, caring, beautiful, chaotic, a bean, supportive (ahem, POLE), and just anything one could ever wish for. I hope you know how amazing you are. You are my chaotic twin. I love causing trouble with you, ticking off mom (love ya mom xx)(FOR THE POLE FOR THE POLE FOR THE POLE), converting people to our ways (...you know who you are), yelling at random things, bullying each other (stop messing with my spelling man), and just talking nonstop. I know I can always be honest with you and I can definitely be insane with you. 

I heard this song the other day, and I couldn’t help but think of you and the family. Particularly, one lyric. Which was:

“But if only you could see yourself in my eyes. You'd see you shine, you shine”

In everyone’s eyes, and especially mine, you are extraordinary. Don’t you ever forget that, love. 

Happy birthday, you beautiful soul.

All my love, Ayla

Xx @all-my-love-cathy

__________

Hey you little bean it’s your birthday and I just wanna say how incredibly proud I am of you. You’re like a little sister to me and I couldn't ask for a better person to be called idiot by x

You're always here for me and I know that I can count on you whenever and wherever. I just want you to know how much I appreciate that and love you for that!

You're one incredibly talented, strong, independent and smart gal and I am so so SO proud of you and of the person you’ve become. You might be way younger than me but I believe that there's so much I can learn from you.

Never change!!! (except maybe cut down the gay disaster, but i mean we working on that)

I hope you have the bestestestestetest of days.

All the love and hugs in the universe, you deserve it!!!

Your idiot xx @sarahzarahh

__________

To Danni, my precious little chaotic bean noodle who I love with all my heart.

So, this is a surprise I’m hoping. I know I once talked about this with Ayla, your fabulous twin, in front of you. But I’m not sure if you thought we were serious. Mom is serious. Dead serious. And it is because I you. I know things haven’t been the easiest, especially these past few weeks. But I want you to know just how amazing you are, as a creator, a TIEF, a writer, a queen, a sister, a bean, a daughter, a friend, and overall a lovely person. Danni, you were the one who asked me to join the group chat, and I have never been happier in my life. You have this amazing way of being able to make others comfortable and elicit the most hilarious and random jokes out of us. You never fail to cheer me up, especially when I am a bi disaster. Or when I am stuck in sad bi hours. And you have proved to me that calling someone an idiot can be affectionate. Even when you and Ayla team up on me (still not buying her a pole btw.) I can’t stop smiling. You add this chaotic and funny spice to my life and I shall eternally love you for that (but please don’t choke on a smartie). You know how to get me motivated and when to joke with me. And you have hilarious reactions to my jokes (I swear you are not actually a disappointment, I love youuuu. [but no pole] ) And you are such an amazing artist, like :0 (you were right, my eye did stop burning.) You are so special and I wish you could see just how much you mean to me. I never made friends who I felt so close with online before! (#I HATE TIME ZONES) And I’m not just complimenting you because it’s your birthday or because I am a hype mom. Danni, I mean it when I say you have impacted me so much. Look, I know I’m a lot, with my zillion ideas, huge word counts, and never ending list of puns, pick up lines, and stories of me being a flailing idiot, but you never once made me feel anything less than loved. So that’s what I want you to feel, always loved. Know that the fam and I will always have your back. You are such a beautiful girl and talented writer who has changed my life and not only helped me find new friends, but a family. Never forget that you have an amazing gift, an ability to make those around you smile. Happy Birthday to one of the Anne Boleyns in the group (even if you deny it), and to the best chaotic bean noodle in the world. I love you Danni. 💚💙💚💙

(P.S. I’m on Newspaper so you know I only spread the truth. :D ;3 )

XO my chaos child, you truly are one of a kind, no category.

Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you.

- Maddy the bi disaster hype mom who writes way too much. <3 @thenameisnoone

__________

Hey Danni! I know I didn’t write as much as the rest but your a beautiful writer! Whenever I check the Parrlyn tag and see that you’ve posted I immediately stop what I’m doing and read the masterpiece! You were one of the first people who spoke to me on Instagram and I couldn’t be more thankful for you doing that! I hope you have the best birthday and stay chaotic!!!! x @politics-notmything

__________

Danni, 

Hey babes! Keeping this short and sweet. Thanks for making me feel more ancient than I already do, but another year older, another year hopefully wiser. You have been nothing but lovely and wonderful in the short amount of time that I have known you and I am so grateful that I can call you my friend. Have an absolutely wonderful birthday, Danni, and here’s to many, many more! Sending you all the love and light. 

x Allie @little-bit-lost-and-found

__________

Danni,

I'm not sure what I can say that hasn’t been said already. So I guess I just want to say thank you. I was so anxious when you first added me to the group chat but now I'm so incredibly happy that I took that leap of faith and met this most incredibly family, so thank you for making the chat. Thank you for calling with me all any time (sometimes for over 2 hours), for making sausages with me, for being the test run with my parents, for editing that essay for me (I still ended up crying but itS OKAY), for putting up with me, for listening to my shit, for comforting me, for you (and Ayla) converting (read: corrupting) me, for being a true TIEF and for just being the most amazing friend, sister and person. I hope your day is awesome an you get royally spoilt. I hope this next year is a good one for you and many good things come your way. May you find good relationships, platonic or otherwise and may you be very happy. I LOVE YOU SM WTF

~ your baby-but-not-actually-younger sister, Hannah xx

[wordsablaze]

Perfectly Chaotic Ease

(thw pt.2) Thirteen's methods of asking Yaz out are an odd mix of cliché and naively optimistic but they manage in their own way and it's still the best night of Yaz's life... Written for prompt 'first date' in thasmin week 2019, enjoy!

A/N: Why are titles so hard? I'm surprising myself by finishing these tbh, I think I'm just way too attached to our space girlfriends! Excuse the typos, please and thank you <3

Yaz can feel herself getting increasingly more tired and tempted to give in to sleep when she hears the sound of something hitting her window.

Again.

And again.

And again and again and again.

After sighing in frustration, she grudgingly pulls herself up and swings her legs over the edge of the bed, slipping her feet into the slippers she’d left there when she’d jumped in, before walking over to the window.

She pulls the curtains back just as another small pebble flies up and fills her vision; it takes all of her self control not to scream or do something else equally foolish.

Once the offending pebble has succumbed to gravity, she yawns and glances outside, then immediately stiffens.

“What are you doing here?” Yaz asks quietly, even though she’s the only one that will hear it.

Thirteen grins up at her and waves excitedly, either because she’d discovered something or because Yaz had actually come to the window; it could very well be either of the two. After a second’s consideration, Yaz hesitantly waves back, offering her a small smile.

Waving her arms around, Thirteen tilts her head questioningly, as if assuming Yaz can just decipher that with no trouble. Apparently, all Yaz needs to do is nod - which she does - for Thirteen to get her answer and, within seconds, the air around her seems to shimmer and fade and morph into the TARDIS walls.

“Yaz! Hi! I didn't disturb you, did I?” Thirteen asks as she pokes her head around the console, something bright and slightly guilty shining in her eyes.

Amused, Yaz shakes her head, but not really lying when she answers, “I was about to do nothing for a couple of hours before going to bed anyway.”

“Going to bed? Oh no, I thought I’d arrived when you were getting out of bed…” Thirteen’s excited expression falters slightly. “Should I come back? It’d only take a second. Well, a second for me anyway.”

“It’s okay, Doctor, I had a nap earlier anyway. What is it you wanted?” Yaz asks, finally walking to the heart of the room and falling into place next to Thirteen, smiling at the strange symbols she knows she’ll never get her head around.

“Oh, well, I was thinking…” Thirteen starts, but then stops.

A few seconds later, when she’s still not continued her explanation, Yaz clears her throat pointedly. “Yeah? What were you thinking?”

Blinking to escape a somewhat daze, Thirteen makes a face at her, her nose scrunching up and her eyebrows furrowing. “Look, are you sure you’re okay to be here? I really can come back… In fact, that’s probably better, let me just-”

Yaz steps forwards and gently places a hand on Thirteen’s elbow, putting a firm stop to her apologetic rambling with an encouraging smile. “Didn’t I say I wanted more time with you? I meant it and I still mean it, so go on, tell me what you were thinking.”

“Well, I was talking to an old friend and I might have mentioned you - all good things, of course, as if anyone could say anything bad about Yaz - and we talked and they gave me an idea when they left to go out for dinner with their partner and I was just thinking that we should try it too.”

Yaz blinks, slightly too tired to decipher that at her normal rate.

“Right, hang on, your friend ended your conversation because they had a date, yeah?”

Thirteen nods excitedly. “So, what do you say, can I do the same?”

Yaz’s heart drops. Is she being told to go back to bed because the Doctor has a date? She can’t even remember her mentioning being in a relationship and, unless she’d been mistaken the whole time, she’d been under the impression that there was something between the two of them.

“You don’t want to?” Thirteen asks, her face falling just as quickly as Yaz’s heart. She’s quicker to exhale past her dejection though, continuing: “I guess it is a bit late, or extremely early depending on how you look at it, for dinner, I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinking, I should have timed this for breakfast tomorrow…”

Breakfast?

“Yaz?” Thirteen’s voice cuts into her confusion and she blinks rapidly, shifting her gaze to her favourite pair of mystical eyes.

“You don’t have to stay if you don’t want to be here, I think I might have misjudged emotions again and make a mistake or just leapt to conclusions without gathering enough evid-”

“Jumped,” Yaz interrupts without thinking.

Thirteen pauses, letting out a breath before frowning. “Sorry?”

Having figured out that Thirteen hadn’t invited her into the TARDIS only to reveal another partner and dismiss her again, Yaz grins. “It’s ‘jumped to conclusions’. And we haven’t done that anyway, we’ve just confused each other.”

“Really?” Thirteen asks, probably setting some sort of record for being the most adorably excited about confusion ever.

“Correct me if I’m wrong but you wanted to ask me out on a dinner date, right?” Yaz inquires gently.

Uncharacteristically blushing, Thirteen ducks her head for a moment before nodding slowly. For once, she says nothing, her usual flow of speech exchanged in favour of waiting for Yaz’s words with an intense silence instead.

Yaz is honoured. She’s also equally as flustered because oh my god the Doctor had just asked her out on a date and this is actually happening and she’s never been so happy in her life but she pushes that aside and beams, skipping the verbal reply stage and throwing her arms around Thirteen.

A sharp gasp escapes Thirteen and Yaz almost pulls away but then warm arms are around her back and she’s being pulled further into the bubble of softness and Thirteen sort of smells like smoke but it’s okay because she’s so warm and comfortable and safe and it might just be the most satisfying hug of Yaz’s life.

“So, what’s for dinner?” Yaz asks once they’ve separated - but not too far, of course.

Thirteen grins sheepishly. “I hadn’t really planned this far, Yaz, but we can go anywhere in all of time and space!”

“What if we don’t?” Yaz replies after a moment of thought. “What if we stay right here, in this time and space, and just enjoy the moment as it is right now?”

For a second, Thirteen seems lost and Yaz almost regrets her answer. But then the second passes as most seconds do and Yaz is met with a stunning smile of awe and admiration. “I think that would be perfect,” Thirteen admits softly.

Yaz matches her grin and intertwines their fingers, glancing at the TARDIS console. “So, which way to your most comfortable date room, then?”

She dimly registers the way Thirteen is gazing at her with wonder, as if she’d done something that had changed the world for the better, and butterflies start to flutter inside her stomach.

The TARDIS seems to hum happily and the boundary of a door to their left glows as her visual instruction. Thirteen snaps out of her impressed daze at this point and squeezes Yaz’s hand before pulling her through the beautiful corridors until they get to a small, circular room that contains a reasonably sized purple sofa and a small coffee table that holds two plates full of what seems like noodles.

Thirteen’s eyes light up as she glances around at nothing and everything. “Since when did we have a sofa? You didn’t tell me! This is amazing! A date with Yaz and a purple sofa! Oh, this can’t get any better!”

Yaz blushes as Thirteen pulls them to the sofa and flops down onto the plush fabric.

Truth be told, Yaz doesn’t remember the sequence of what happens next. She’s so overwhelmed with what must be euphoria that she only focuses on certain moments, like when she tries to pick up her food with the wrong end of the fork because she's too busy cataloguing the sparkle in the Doctor's eyes, Thirteen almost dropping the bowl and causing a mess, the two of them leaning on each other as they eat, Thirteen temporarily forgetting to eat as she investigates Yaz’s piercings, and the way they seem to work around each other to put their plates down and curl up once they’re done.

They end up nestled in each other’s arms, Yaz leaning her head on Thirteen’s shoulder with an unshakeable smile as Thirteen lets her head rest on Yaz’s, sandwiching Yaz in the most perfect warmth.

“Thank you, Doctor,” Yaz murmurs eventually.

“Of course not! I should be thanking you! I got to go on a date with Yaz!” Thirteen exclaims immediately, happiness laced into her tone.

For maybe the tenth time in the past few hours - or rather, what she assumes is a few hours because she has no way of telling - a ridiculous amount of blood rushes to Yaz’s face and her cheeks heat up.

“But I got my first date with the Doctor,” Yaz argues, “and nothing in the universe can beat that.”

Thirteen goes still as if she wants to disagree but Yaz isn’t having any of it. She regretfully but determinedly peels herself off Thirteen and turns to kindly glare at her. “You’re not allowed to argue, okay?”

Nodding gratefully, Thirteen places a hand on Yaz’s cheek and gently brushes her thumb over Yaz’s skin, a soft smile on her face. “You really are special, I hope you know that.”

A grin breaks out on Yaz’s face as she nods sincerely. “I think I can accept that now.”

She wants to say something sweet back but a sly yawn escapes her and she ends up flustered again, the look of fondness in Thirteen’s eyes definitely not meant to be aimed at such an expression of tiredness.

“It might be bedtime,” Thirteen suggests, and Yaz can’t bring herself to roll her eyes because there’s something in her tone, something kind and pure that she can’t bring herself to mock.

Not caring whether it’s the joy in her heart or the sleepiness in her mind, Yaz finds herself asking: “Can I stay here?”

“Here?” Thirteen echoes, as if something like that hadn’t even occurred to her. Which, considering the way she’d attempted and almost failed to actually ask Yaz out on a date, it might genuinely not have.

Yaz nods, another content yawn escaping her. “Can I stay here with you for tonight? I don’t want this date to end…”

Her eyes start to close but the empty silence that should have contained an answer causes Yaz to blink herself awake. She looks at Thirteen to find her in a state of something akin to shock, bewilderment and amazement written clearly on her face.

“Doctor?” Yaz asks, frowning slightly. “Are you okay? Have I missed something?”

Thirteen shakes her head quickly, apparently jerked out of her contemplation. “Are you sure you’d be happy staying here overnight?”

Oh.

Yaz sits up and ignores her urge to fall asleep for just a moment. “I generally tend to mean most things I say, you know? Of course I want to stay here, you’re… brilliant. And I’ve never felt happier in my life. And, anyway, I can use this as a way to make sure you get some rest too.”

“Okay,” Thirteen whispers softly, happily.

Yawning yet again, Yaz settles herself back into Thirteen’s warmth and safety and lets her eyes close. “Goodnight, Doctor,” she mumbles in what she hopes is a coherent manner, internally thanking her lucky stars that she hadn't fallen asleep before noticing the pebbles at her window; what a missed opportunity that would have been.

“The best night,” Thirteen comments absently, and Yaz finds time to blush one last time before she falls - no, nicely settles into what seems like the best sleep she’ll ever have.

Only the TARDIS is there to see the way Thirteen lets herself sleep properly for once, lulled into a beautiful rest by the magic of the human curled up beside her, the two of them easily entwined in each other’s company as if it were a blanket weaved from love and peace and hope.

like/reblog but don’t repost, thanks!

[altonajitzu]

What I Cannot Say (Pt. 3- End)

Dinnertime at TWICE dorm was always noisy and chaotic. Even when no one was speaking, the large kitchen was bustling with cooking sounds and the clinking of utensils against bowls containing various foods. Seeing as no one in the group could cook well nor enjoy cooking, it was a free-for-all where everyone either ordered take-out or tried their hands at whatever attractive recipes they found online. Therefore, fire extinguishers were never put out of reach.

In a corner, Nayeon- the eldest member of TWICE- was devouring her ramen in a highly unrefined fashion. Not caring even a little about how her hair was practically covering her face and brushing inside the bowl, she continued to slurp down the noodles with a fervor.

On the other side sat Mina and Jeongyeon, enjoying their dinnertime with a manner so disparate from Nayeon, people could not think they were sitting in the same room. She was leisurely flipping through a random megazine as she enjoyed her sandwich, while Mina looked over her shoulder, idly swirling her cup of tea. In the middle, Sana was being Sana- hopelessly following a cooking video, doing something wrong at every step, shrieking everytime something hot touched her hand. .

They barely spared a glance at the front door as it opened, and Jihyo came in.

"Welcome back Jihyo, why are you home so late. Thought you'd be home by noon." Not looking up from her megazine, Jeongyeon commented.

"Oh, it's nothing. Just some other business." Taking off her shoes, Jihyo answered flippantly.

Mina stopped playing with her cup of tea.

"Oh." Said Jeongyeon, not wanting to dwell more on the topic.

"Say, Jihyo..." Mina asked tentatively, with a hint of worry in her voice. "Do you happen to know where Tzuzu is? We haven´t seen her since she left for school this morning either."

"I don`t know Mina, you can ask her manager? He is always nearby, no worries." Came another nonchalant reply. Jihyo was currently bending down to take off her shoes, her long hair obscuring whatever expression she had.

The brash sound of Nayeon's slurping ceased.

"Jihyo-ah..." Seeing the leader already heading towards their bedroom, she hastily called. "... Do you want to have some dinner? We ordered a lot for you guys."

"... I'm not hungry." Having stopped momentarily to listen to Nayeon, Jihyo answered and continued her retreat without turning back.

The obnoxious noise of Sana's cooking came to a halt.

Jihyo quickly entered the room and slammed the door shut.

The kitchen was now completely devoid of sound, as residents of the largest bedroom exchanged worried looks.

Something was terribly, dreadfully wrong.

_____

 Ever since the very first day of TWICE, so far as Sixteen era, Jihyo’s overwhelming kindness had been unequivocal. At the beginning, where the trainees were either new to Korea or overly anxious of the competition underway, some might have doubted her for putting up a nice act and having ulterior motives. However, as days went by and every member- Major or Minor, depending which team Jihyo belonged to at the time- was showered by care and affection courtesy of JYP’s longest trainee, the suspicion began to fade, gradually replaced by appreciation. They started to rely on her private notes left at their bedside early in the morning, on her shoulder after they were reproached by the producer, and on her sweet encouraging words whispered into their ears whenever they needed emotional support.

 Thus, Jihyo’s highest score during the anonymous voting session came as little surprise. That was when whatever negative thoughts about her completely dissipated; the trainees realized, by looking at the tally, that Jihyo had gone out of her way to help every single one of them at the expense of her own time and effort- not because she wanted something from them, but because that was the kind of person she was. While there might be some disappointment, discovering that one was not a special person to the girl, it was nothing compared to the collective adoration. That day, everyone knew- Jihyo was undoubtedly the centerpiece of the future girl group, the sister that they all needed, the leader that they could all depend on.

 She had always been there, that kindhearted Jihyo. Sometimes too close for comfort, but when TWICE truly needed her, she never failed to show up. Not even once.

 Therefore, when that very Jihyo acted nonchalant and distant, those closest to her- Nayeon, Mina, and Sana- knew she was deeply hurt. She was always looking after someone, and that left no time to look after her, not even herself. She had completely forgotten how, and thus when the pain became too great to handle, she turned into a completely different person.

_____

 “Jihyo-ah?” Nayeon gingerly knocked on the door. She half-expected a lack of answer and they would have to force it open, but then she heard the person inside shuffling towards where the three of them stood, and Jihyo simply opened it with a pleasant smile.

 “Sorry unnie, I had to change. Haven’t got time to take off my makeup though.” She tugged at her clothing, which was not her nightwear- a plain red long-sleeved shirt and shorts. “So, what is it?” She asked, oblivious to the trio’s concern.

 As Nayeon was struggling to approach the situation withou scaring the girl off, Jihyo’s stomach suddenly let out a grumble. Seizing the opportunity, she took hold of the embarrassed leader’s hand.

 “Why did you tell us you’re not hungry?” Nayeon asked with a pout. She wanted to show that while the question was interrogative, it did not hold any ill intent.

 “I don’t want to eat.” Jihyo answered monotonously, the positive façade long since dropped.

 Sana felt it was her turn to try.

 “Jihyo-ah… You only skip meals when you’re sad. What’s wrong?” Asked Sana quietly, knowing they were walking on thin ice. Yet, despite the tentativeness, her inquiry irked Jihyo even more.

 “Please Sana, I really don’t want to talk about it.”

 “Just tell us about it Jihyo, we’ll help you.”

 “I’m fine. Really.”

 “If you would just…”

 “I said I’m fine! Why do you keep acting like you know me!?” Jihyo snapped, and immediately regretted it. Her hand flew to her mouth, but what was done was done. Sana was petrified, tears already welling up her eyes. Her arms hung limp at her sides as she stood devastated by the harsh answer.

 “I’m… I’m sorry. Please let me be alone for some time…” Jihyo’s voice cracked. She slammed the door shut, but it was one second too late- her members already heard the choked sobs that she could no longer hold in.

 ____

 Tzuyu did not come home until nighttime. As the clock struck ten, she appeared at the dorm entrance, looking listless and distressed.

 When she reached the common room, she was surprised by the gloomy atmosphere. Nayeon and Jeongyeon were sitting on either side of the couch, looking as if someone just told them their wedding were cancelled. Mina was staring at nowhere in particular, her eyes red and puffy from crying. Jihyo was nowhere to be found.

Mina was the first to notice Tzuyu’s presence.

“Tzuyu-ah? Why are you home so late? Where have you been?” Tzuyu was too distracted to answer properly though.

“Where is Jihyo-unnie? I need to talk to her.”

The mention of their leader made Nayeon look up. She narrowed her eyes at Tzuyu, who instinctively winced at the sudden aggression.

“Mina asked you a question, Tzuyu-ah. Why are you asking about Jihyo?”

“W-we were hanging out earlier today, and I must have said something…” Tzuyu was having difficulty breathing. “I think that made Jihyo-unnie angry, and she left.”

If Nayeon’s voice made Tzuyu feel a bit apprehensive, the look of utter shock and disbelief on all three members present frightened her.

“… What happened, Nayeon-unnie? D-did something happen to Jihyo-unnie?” She hesitantly asked, fearing for both the answer and her life.

Before either Sana or Mina had time to react, Nayeon angrily bolted from her sitting position, grabbed Tzuyu’s shoulder and pushed her down the nearest chair she could find. Staring deep into Tzuyu’s helpless eyes, she whispered in a dangerous tone.

“Tzuyu, Jihyo is crying in the bedroom. She asked to be alone, and we have no idea why. But now we know it has something to do with you.”

Tzuyu was ready to burst into tears in any second. At this moment, a gentle hand laid itself on Nayeon’s shoulder to appease any further outburst.

“Nayeon-unnie, don’t be like this," came Mina's soothing whisper. "We know you’re worried, but you’re just making Tzuyu feel worse.”

It calmed Nayeon down enough to throw Tzuyu a look that could pass as apologetic, and she backed away. Mina took the opportunity to crouch down and gently cup Tzuyu’s cheeks. She instinctively leaned into the newfound source of warmth for solace. It helped, albeit not by much.

“Tzuyu-ah, I know you feel terrible right now," she said, low and soft, as comforting as she could manage. “We don’t hate you. We all love you very much, we just want you guys to feel better.”

It was more than Tzuyu could take. After all that had just happened, the tenderness and care was far too much for her to handle. Her lips quivered. Her throat clogged up and her lips bit together tightly, and even though she squeezed her eyes shut, she couldn't keep the tears in. Another heartbeat and she choked on the first sob.

“M-Mina-unnieee… I’m sorry, I’m so sorry… I hurt Jihyo-unnie, I don’t know what to do…” She said between hiccups, her voice cracking.

Mina’s eyes watered, it hurt so much to see her closest friends like this. First Jihyo, now Tzuyu. She pulled the maknae’s shaking form into her arms. She held Tzuyu in silence, rocking her slowly as the torrent of tears soaked her chest.

_____

After a few minutes, Tzuyu managed to calm down a little and retold the whole story. She glanced desperately at her unnies, who all had their heads buried in their hands.

“Tzuyu-ah…” It was Sana who gave the first opinion. “I thought since you two are really close, you’d know this already, but Jihyo hates photographing. Like, she really hates it.” Nayeon and Mina nodded.

Tzuyu’s eyes widened. She looked at her unnies slack-jawed, hoping she heard it wrong. At Tzuyu’s bewilderment, Sana sighed and continued.

“Do you remember our second mission in Sixteen?” Tzuyu slowly nodded. “You were in Minor back then, so you wouldn’t know this. Jihyo was scolded for being so inconfident, since she always hid herself behind us. She was really insecure about her weight back then, you know.”

“But…” Tzuyu wanted to speak, but Sana cut her off.

“That’s not the worst part Tzuyu-ah. She was afraid of being kicked from the show, so she spent all her time studying up on photography. We were sleeping in the same room, and every time I woke up, she was at her laptop, reading about aperture, rule of third, beauty angles, all those stuff. She had a disgusted look on her face all that time. Still, she read up on everything, learned her own beauty angles, and tested them out. She did all that in one night. The day after that we had our individual photoshoot, and this time she did better. Well…” Sana trailed off as Tzuyu looked down in extreme guilt. The tears she barely managed to suppress were creeping back into her vision, threatening to fall again.

Despite the improvement, it was not enough for Jihyo to maintain her place in the Major team, and it was none other than Tzuyu who took her necklace. Of course, it was not necessarily her fault, since none of them had any say in whose necklace they were to yank off, but Tzuyu was no robot. It was not very different from an executioner exercising his job; it had felt absolutely terrible, even more so now that she knew how hard Jihyo tried.

That’s why she acted like that. She despised it yet she spent the whole afternoon with me, and I told her to go for it again tomorrow.

“I… I never knew… Jihyo-unnie always looked so happy, so excited when we took pictures together, even just now…” Tzuyu managed to squeeze out her last argument, her voice quivering.

Nayeon, who had been keeping silent until now, heaved a sigh in frustration.

“Jinjja… Tzuyu-ah, I love you, but right now I really want to slap you.” Tzuyu lowered her head yet again. “Just tell me this, are you just too blind and stupid to see what’s in front of you? Or you just don’t care about your leader at all?”

Tzuyu stayed silent. For once, it did not seem that bad to choose the first choice, to admit to being blind and stupid.

“That’s enough, Nayeon-unnie.”

Tzuyu snapped her head up at the voice she loved so much. Sure enough, Jihyo was standing there, listening to the whole conversation. She stared into Jihyo’s big brown irises, normally bright and cheerful, but now distant and lifeless. It was clear that she was crying, only stopping mere moments ago.

“Jihyo…” Nayeon tried to explain, but Jihyo cut her off.

“Tzuyu doesn’t deserve to be insulted like that, Nayeon-unnie. I appreciate it a lot that you care enough to defend me, but it isn’t her fault. It’s mine.”

Jihyo proceeded to crouch down to where Tzuyu was sitting. She wiped away the wet strands of hair sticking on Tzuyu’s face, revealing underneath them desperate eyes looking back at her, heavily bloodshot from crying.

“There’s nothing you should feel bad about, Tzuyu-ah. I overreacted and ruined our day. If only I didn’t love you as much as I do, we would not have to be here right now.”

“You… love me?” For the first time in the night, Tzuyu’s question was filled with hope. She did not expect what came next.

“Yes I do, Tzuyu-ah. I was just too selfish to know you’re uncomfortable with that.” Taking a deep breath, Jihyo continued.

“I won’t lie, it does hurt really bad when you think I like photography. I… I guess I just got my expectations up too high. It’s presumptuous of me to hope there’s something between us and that you would know me more personally, while I never bothered to talk about myself. I will try to get rid this unwanted feeling, and we’ll be good friends again, I promise.”

Jihyo declared, and without waiting for the maknae to response, she turned on her heels and went back to her bedroom.

The sight of Jihyo walking away from her had never been so painful to Tzuyu.

“No!!!” All of a sudden, she screamed, startling everyone present. Her voice was croaking and hoarse from the sheer amount of crying she did that night alone.

You’re my translator, Jihyo-unnie. I’m always lost and helpless without you.

You’re my cook. Everything you made for me is the best delicacy in this world.

You’re my tutor. With you by my side, everything becomes clear.

You’re my waiter. You are always there, satisfying my every whim. I’m most comfortable with you around, and no one else.

You’re my photographer, and I am yours. I want to be the prettiest person in your eyes, just as much as I want you to be one in mine. I want you to look at only at me.

I’m so afraid that you’d reject me, so I can never say what I want to.

I’m selfish and insensitive and stupid. I don’t deserve you, but you’re my everything.

I love you, Jihyo-unnie. Please don’t leave me.

Tzuyu collapsed onto the floor. She was mentally exhausted, and with the shock of what Jihyo said, her mind decided to run away from reality.

_____

When Tzuyu awoke, it was dawn.

She opened her eyes to an unfamiliar surrounding. Blinking once, she registered it was the dorm’s biggest bedroom. She could faintly see the sleeping figures of her unnies around her.

The one lying directly opposite from her was Mina, blissful in slumber while hugging her penguin plushine. Peering downwards, Tzuyu could made out Sana’s hairstyle on the bed at the far side of the room.

Then, this bed I slept on must be…

Yesterday’s events hit her hard, not unline an express train running over a clueless deer. Tzuyu suddenly felt dizzy as everything came flooding back, she closed her eyes to balance herself from the emotional vertigo.

Only then did she notice a foregin source of heat snuggling behind her, a newfound warmth that kept her in place.

Jihyo cracked open a sleepy eye as her human teddy bear shifted. She smiled at the sight of Tzuyu sitting up and staring at her in utter astonishment.

“Tzuyu-ah, you’re awake. You really scared us there, you dummy.”

“J-Jihyo-unnie? What happened? Why am I here?” Tzuyu stuttered, still reeling from the shock.

“Well, since you don’t seem to remember anything, I guess I’ll have to embarrass you again.” Jihyo replied, tongue in cheek. “You were really drained after yesterday, so after your adorable confession, you just fell asleep right on the floor. I carried you to my bed, and here we are.” This only served to confuse the maknae even more, and now that she was fully awake, make her a bit nervous.

“Confession? To w-whom?” It was not like Tzuyu did not know the answer to that already, she was just not sure when or how she did it.

Jihyo grinned amusedly, a blush forming on her face as she recalled. “Oh, I don’t know…” she ran a finger down Tzuyu’s flawless cheek. “A certain translator-slash-cook-slash-tutor-slash-waiter-slash-photographer, ring any bell?”

Tzuyu’s eyes grew twice its size, and her mouth dropped open. “Oh my god!! I said that out loud? I thought it was only in my head!!”

“You certainly did, Tzuyu-ah. Loud and clear, enough for everyone to hear.” The maknae snapped her head to the side. Mina was already awake and looking at them, wearing a proud smile. “You finally managed to say what you think. I’m so happy for you.”

“Yah!!! I can’t believe this!” Unable to handle the embarrassment, Tzuyu sought refuge by burying her head in Jihyo’s ample chest, which made the older girl laugh.

“But really…” Jihyo said, eyes glistening from mirth. “I’m really glad to hear you say all that Tzuyu-ah. I was this close to giving up, but it was so sweet I fell for you all over again.”

From her position, Tzuyu mumbled something unintelligible.

“Huh? I didn’t quite catch you.”

“I’m so sorry unnie.” Tzuyu finally looked up. Her eyes were a storm of emotions; guilt and sadness, mixed with appreciation happiness. “For everything.”

“It’s okay, dummy yoda.” Jihyo said, looking down fondly at the guilt-ridden girl. “It’s all okay now.”

“Can I kiss you?” Tzuyu asked with particular boldness. Jihyo grinned, pressing her lips against Tzuyu’s own. They both melted into the kiss, relishing in the soft sensation and sweet taste of one another’s lips. It was soft, chaste and slow, yet it drove both of them crazy, and left them wanting more afterwards.

“I love you Tzuyu. So much.”

“I love you too, Jihyo-unnie.”