#Parking Enforcement

[draconym]

My favorite person who ever took me to court when I was a law enforcement park ranger was the guy who showed up to the courthouse with his dog dressed in a little bowtie so he could tell the court the full story of how "actually, he rescued me," who then had to explain to the citation hearing board that yes, he did intentionally fart on a park ranger and threaten to run them over with a car in response to being issued a $30 citation for an off-leash dog.

[fairparking]

Parking Enforcement Defence Solutions UNIQUELY offers

Fair Parking offers the most PROVEN comprehensive answer to ANY style of parking enforcement whether via a private parking company (parking charge notice), or local authorities (penalty charge notice) where bailiff action is resorted to post haste, and illegal throughout . Our service includes 100% protection against ALL court summonses and interventions (parking is a CIVIL matter), arrests for alleged obstructions of a bounty hunting bailiff (now called 'enforcement agents') or alleged warrants of control (100% fakes - if they bother to produce them at all). Particularly beware of those on 'smart' phones who are simply contacting their own office and NOT any court Parking Enforcement Defence Solutions also offers a 100% no quibble refund for any case involving a private parking company in the event of it obtaining a county court judgment against those who use our service - and we can promise that as nobody who has ever issued a court summons has ever succeeded in getting a CCJ once Parking Enforcement Defence Solutions has written to them producing our damning and indefensible statements.

[breesperez139]

Dc x Dp Prompt #5

Demon Twin AU only Damian never had a blood son phase and has “biological siblings” (how absurd):

Damian would like to start by saying he is not at fault for this… miscommunication. Truly, how was he to know sharing the same blood as Jasmine and Danyal would make them “siblings”? Not once has anyone mentioned such absurd claims. He has never and will never treat either of the two the way he would Richard or any of his other siblings, but apparently sharing the same donors when being created automatically makes people siblings.

Worse, father is upset at him and mother for “hiding away” two of his “children” from him. Richard and Thomas will not stop staring at him. Todd, Brown, and Drake will not stop laughing. Cassandra has not stopped looking at his body language since this whole encounter started. Alfred is giving him his patented disappointed face he oh so hates but what is he to do?

Damian was not hiding anything or anyone. Jasmine and Danyal have not nor will they ever be his siblings. They are the children of Jack and Maddie Fenton just as Richard and the rest of them are Bruce’s children. Blood has nothing to do with family. They are at best “god-siblings” or “cousins” if father refuses to believe they are simply childhood companions.

There is barely a hint of emotion as father purses his lips while his siblings continue looking on at him in disbelief. Damian is not understanding why they are having trouble comprehending such simple logic. It is common sense to know that siblings are the children at least one of your parents have raised other than yourself. Parents are the people who raise you. Talia raised him therefore she is his mother. He lives with Bruce who is now raising him and therefore he is his father.

Neither Talia nor Bruce raised Jasmine or Danyal, therefore they are not siblings. It is merely coincidence that he shared blood with both Bruce and Talia. After all, every time he’s visited Amity Park, most children look nothing like their parents. How can it not be coincidence when it is clearly far more normal to raise children who don’t share an ounce of blood with you, than those who do.

How can it not be normal when Jack Fenton took Jasmine in so easily knowing he didn’t share any dna with her? Even more so with Danyal who doesn’t share even a drop of blood with either Jack or Maddie. Look at yourself father. Out of all your children, only one shares your dna. Do not try and pin this on Damian for being the only sensible person in this family. Blood siblings, ha, don’t make him laugh.

[wendytestabrat]

south park phone destroyer but it’s just the kyman moments

[eddseddede]

late trend but i wanted to do this with colette!!!

i dunno if its actually canon that the fun enforcer turns into her but i like the theory

[doctorjackdaw]

my bitchy park ranger desolation dad, Vernon (and his sexy boss) original sketch under the cut vv

when you're way WAYYYY to pregnant to be on patrol and your boss knows it and wants to knock some sense into your bullheaded ass

[casiavium]

why are national park rangers police officers. Why if I wanted to be a park ranger would I need police law enforcement training.

[alsosprachvelociraptor]

Dystopian AU or something?!?! idk. its TimJim AU time

Set in a not-so-distant future, Tim lives alone in the outskirts of the authoritarian futuristic big city, and deals in scrap materials that other poor people like him need to survive the suburbia of the generic evil corporate city.

But the futuristic evil police want to stop him, and the enhanced cyborg policemen try to catch him... until Tim hits one of them on the head.

The cyborg wakes up... different, and his humanity and emotions and consciousness restored! And now Timothy has a boyfriend i guess!

[morhido]

I think hunter should take his and willow's 'captain' thing to just a comically large extent. He will do literally anything she says if she says it with enough authority, not only because she's The Captain™️ and he's used to following orders, but because he has so much genuine respect and admiration for her that he'll happily do whatever she wants from him.

Willow eventually figures out this power of hers, and she would never even dream of abusing it but it's very funny to see it work whenever she does use it. One time he's overworking himself and she's like "hubter!! Please for the love of titan get some rest!!!" "It's fiiiiine, everything's fiiine, i'm not even tired–" "HUNTER. TAKE A BREAK. CAPTAIN'S ORDERS." and it is absolutely HYSTERICAL how quickly he drops everything to go take a nap.

Girlie has the power to make one of the most powerful people in history do whatever she wants and she uses it to instill healthy habits and boundaries

[bridgebastion]

so yesterday at work we had sustained >50 mph winds right. and my coworker was trying to hold down a parking sign but lost control of it and. well. it cut my neck open. i am fine, the damage was relatively superficial, no stitches or anything, but i am going to have THE sickest scar of ALL time

[gender-critical-analytical]

I live in a tightly packed area and sometimes, because there's a pond that sits right up against my and my neighbor's property, random men (and women, but I only mind when it's men) decide to plop down in my yard and start fishing for the bluegill. I'm still working on my confrontation skills (a combination of intense female socialization, liberal midwestern 'mind your own business and look the other way' mindset, and autism that makes it a struggle to look people in the face during even the most normal of occasions) but I have recently found that bringing my dog outside on her leash and letting her bark and growl at them while frantically tugging on the leash to get to them does a great job of making them suddenly, conveniently, want to move a few yards down, and I don't have to say a word during it. In fact, staring silently at them makes it work even better!

[zvaigzdelasas]

Great classic example of the bizarre takes you feel compelled to produce when your primary lens of analysis uses the same tools as technocratic neoliberalism (ie statistics divorced from what produces the statistic)

Keep in mind while reading this, somewhere between 10-20% of the population of Mauritania are quite literally defacto chattel slaves (Kirchik seems to have accidentally forgotten to mention this)

in a remote corner of the Arab world, an elected government has suddenly bloomed. On March 25, in the rural, undeveloped, west African nation of Mauritania (population: 3,270,000), Sidi Ould Cheikh Abdallahi, a sometime government minister, defeated rival Ahmed Ould Daddah, a prominent economist, in a runoff election for the presidency. Both sides campaigned vigorously and participated in a live, televised debate. Ould Daddah even had his own website, an impressive feat in a country where agriculture accounts for half of the population's livelihood. Election observers from the European Union, African Union, and Arab League--as well as non-profit civic groups like the U.S. government-funded National Democratic Institute--all praised the process as free and fair. Turnout for preliminary balloting on March 11 was 70 percent, and it remained high at 67 percent for the March 25 runoff. Parliamentary elections and a referendum on the country's new constitution had been held last year. All of these ballots went off without a hitch. Abdallahi was sworn in April 19 and claimed that the peaceful transition to democratic rule makes Mauritania "an undisputable model of a peaceful ending to a monolithic era." Unfortunately, coverage of this noteworthy international development has been scant.[...]

As the American journalist James Martin, who was present for the first round of balloting, wrote in the Cairo-based Al-Ahram Weekly, "Mauritania's official transition to democracy has given many hope that real reform may now become possible in the largely desert country and that its experiment in democratic rule will serve as an example to the rest of the region." Publicizing the good news out of Mauritania should be an urgent task of the State Department.

2007

[inniave]

ABOVE ALL THINGS

SUFFERING,

GLORIFIED

[wendytestabrat]

who each of the four boys has the closest relationship with in the group

CARTMAN: he’s closest with kyle & kenny obviously bc that’s who we see him hanging out with the most. stan is cartman’s least fav bc he isn’t all argumentative & pissy like kyle is and actually has self-respect so cartman finds him boring LOL. he also can’t use him and manipulate him easily like he does with kyle & kenny. cartman is also jealous that stan keeps kyle from him & kyle is a two faced bitch around stan. stan is the real goodie two shoe saint of the group, not kyle. kyle just pretends to care abt morality to show off in front of stan lol. so yeah kyle & kenny are more likely to go along with cartman’s schemes and do fucked up shit & have fun.

KYLE: he’s closest with stan & cartman and kenny is his least fav. which we see how kenny is always kyle’s LAST choice of who to hang out with and when him and stan are fighting he goes to cartman LOL. kenny is such a fucking afterthought to kyle he only hangs out with him if there’s no one else to hang out with or if he can use him for shit. the only reason kyle & kenny had that adventure together in the episode “jewbilee” was bc stan & cartman had their own plotlines in the other two episodes in the meteor shower trilogy lol. stan was at that party and cartman was being babysat by shelly.

STAN: yeah kyle & kenny are the only ones in the group stan gives a shit about and he STRONGLY dislikes cartman. stan is always the one in the group who tries to get cartman kicked out or get kyle & kenny to ignore him and stay away from him. whenever it’s the three of them (stan, kyle, & kenny) all being petty & doing shit behind cartman’s back & pretending not to be his friend that’s thanks to stan LOL. but that’s a whole rant i did on why stan is actually the one who dislikes cartman, not kyle. kyle just acts fake and pretends he hates cartman the most so he looks cool to stan bc stan’s more popular than him. kyle & kenny are rlly the only ones in the group who try to maintain a friendship with cartman and hang out with him one on one & stan only tolerates him to be polite & avoid drama and bc he cares about kyle and knows how obsessed kyle is with cartman lol.

KENNY: yep you guessed it he’s closest with stan & cartman (but mainly cartman) and kyle is his least fav. kenny gets along well with stan wayyyy better than kyle and agrees with him on a lot of shit and they have a lot of plotlines together. like for instance when the group split up in TFBW & “faith hilling” kenny chose stan’s side and stan was the saddest when kenny died bc he cares abt him the most. i think stan & kenny get along well and have a good friendship bc they’re both the nicer easy going unproblematic kings of the group while kyle & cartman are always throwing fists LOL. i also feel like cartman & kyle’s obnoxious rivalry and love/hate relationship over the years has forced stan & kenny to grow closer with each other bc there are a lot of moments where the two of them will leave & hang out one on one or whatever when they get sick of cartman & kyle’s bullshit when they’re fighting. & then ofc kenny likes hanging around cartman bc cartman likes to have fun like him and they are canon bffs. kenny doesn’t give a shit abt kyle bc kyle doesn’t give a shit abt him and doesn’t view him as a friend so the feeling is mutual. and bc kyle has been classist towards kenny for being poor just like cartman, but hey AT LEAST CARTMAN MAKES AN EFFORT TO HANG OUT WITH KENNY AND HAVE FUN WITH HIM