#PLEASE WAT H THIS SHOW!!

[birdy-reblog]

Hey maybe watch scavengers reign it’s got evil woman, she’s like a rat bastard and faces little to no consequences for her actions and honestly she’s kinda great, maybe if that doesn’t strike your fancy we’ve got pathetic meow meow man that fucks up repeatedly and often, we’ve got an old fat dilf that is just so tired and every single alien yearns for his body, we’ve got yuri in two different flavors; human on human and human on robot. It’s the same human both times btw. Or my personal favorite one: she’s just there for the ride and adores the beauty of it all. I love you Ursula scavengers reign<3

There’s also the creatures and horror of nature I fucking love this show hands and knees begging you to watch this show.

[trulybetty]

Sunday | Week In Review IX

I feel like I just wrote the last Sunday Week in Review five minutes ago and like six years ago at the same time. Short work weeks and coming off the back of vacation really do mess with your sense of time.

Another short week ahead too, Canadian Thanksgiving tomorrow, happy Thanksgiving to my fellow Canucks who observe this holiday! 🧡

October has brought so many good stories to my dash that my drafts list is out of control and I still have so many good fics I haven't finished reading yet! Having said that, I've enjoyed the pause to jump in with these October x 500 prompts. It's been a jolt of inspiration/creativity that I needed.

Having said that, on with the week in review!

T R U L Y  U P D A T E S . . .

october x 500 (masterlist)

oct' x 01 - ruffled hair (joel x gn!reader)

oct' x 02 - apple scent (chiffon!dieter x bryony)

oct’ x 03 - full of colours (tim rockford x f!reader)

oct' x 04 - walks in the forest (strings!joel x reader)

oct' x 05 - autumnal (dieter x gn!reader)

oct' x 06 - falling leaves (gold rush!joel x charlotte)

oct' x 07 - chestnuts (chiffon!dieter x bryony)

W H A T  I  R E A D . . .

On Deck (One Shots) (Jack AU) by @something-tofightfor Just when I think I’ve gone through someone’s master list, I manage to find a gem and this is one of them. I have no clue about baseball, went to a game and had no idea what was happening no matter how many times someone tried to explain. However, I am 110% positive that if Jack was to explain the rules to me, I’d know him inside and out, oh and maybe a bit about baseball too. Gotta make sure those lessons get stretched out…

Bloom (Joel AU) by @penaonthestreets-javiinthesheetsThis was such a delightful opening chapter! Reader has their own flower shop, and just so happens our favourite Texan pays a visit. The characterization of Ellie almost steals the show from Joel’s meet-cute with Reader - I’m not going to spoil it, but I had to pick myself off of the floor after - just saying…

Working Title | Chapter 13 (Dieter) by @rhoorl I’m so rooting for these two! Both deserve a happy ending (in more than one sense!) and yet it seems there's those who want to bring them down or stand in their way. This update was a little angst, incredibly sweet and the last bit, well - I can't wait to read the next update!

Kinktober Day Two (Frankie) 🌶️ by @youvebeenlivingfictional I love the whole fun roleplay trop between established couples and this one does an excellent job of doing just that! Reader and Frankie are out at the bar having fun and, I'm not going to spoil it - go enjoy it for yourself!

Tip Your Server (Dieter) by @nothoughtsjustmeds This is just the best! Dieter and wife!reader on the night of his Oscar win and it’s just so much hilarity, sweetness & spice and the banter between the two is just the best. Please go read it, you won’t be disappointed, I promise! 

Kiss Me Quick (Dieter) by @secretelephanttattoo This, how I love this so! It’s a love letter to the British seaside and is told through a day at the beach with the one and only Dieter. It managed to not only invoke laughter but homesickness too. I’d go to the seaside for a stick of rock any day of the week with Dieter. 

Sofa So Good (Frankie) by @secretelephanttattoo This was cozy, domestic bliss wrapped up as tight as my fingers would be in Frankie’s hair. This was a sweet slice of life and so done so well. A perfect cozy Sunday read if you’re looking for one!

Video Nasty I & II (Joel) 🌶️ by @sin-djarin I don't think I've recovered from these two yet... Oof, incredibly hot, incredibly Joel and incredibly read-again worthy! Also provided a fun memory of mine working in a video store and will Marcus be forever associated with a poorly titled porno? Yes. Yes he will be.

Paranoid Heart (Javier P.) by @goodwithcheese This was such a great opener and introduction to our main character and Javi. Now, if you're thinking you need to watch Narcos to read this, take it from me, Ms. Truly 'I think I've watched six episodes now but can't remember' Betty, you don't need to, because Megan is so good at immersing you in her characters worlds that you'll be well taken care of. Can't wait to see where this story leads us!

A Month of Sundays(Various) by @gnpwdrnwhiskey I love each and every one posted so far! There’s something to be said about drabbles, little slices of life etc., six-sentence fics - because they’re not as easy to write as you think. There needs to be some establishing of what’s going on, and while not a resolution - something to end on. These are all great insights into some established characters and some we’ve not met before and I can’t wait to see what the rest of the month brings!

No Panties, No Problems (Frankie) by @blackfemalenerd Frankie is an A-grade menace here and, oof is this hot? Please do yourself a favour and go read it and leave your comments - because I think we all deserve some more of this Frankie!

Delta Landscaping | Chapter 7 (Triple Frontier Boys) by @rhoorl Jess really knows how to weave multiple stories and character backgrounds together and take you through from start to finish and never feel like you've missed something or added confusion. This week's installment is no different! We've got it all packed into this chapter and I don't want to spoil anything, but please go check it out!

M E M O R A B L E  P O S T S . . .

The next guest appearance on Mulefalls Court @rhoorl

the grey sweatpants revelation

hands, hands and more hands

a visual from @maggiemayhemnj that I won't be forgetting anytime soon, and this one here where I might still be on the floor from

a good Tumblr 101 + reblog etiquette post from @morallyinept

Bob's Burgers fest started by @darkroastjoel

B R O U G H T  T H E  J O Y . . .

Just how lovely this community is - this week I've had so many great interactions with equally amazing people and I'm so happy to have found a home in this little corner and appreciate every one of you who comes and interacts with my blog and me in whatever capacity 💕

F R A N K I E  C A T ™️ . . .

I missed last weeks update, so here’s an update on Frankie Cat - she’s very much settled in. She is pretty laid back as her name sake, but sometimes her tiny humans can get on her last nerves, but baby Truly #2 and her are BFF’s (mostly because baby Truly is forcing Frankie to love her, like I would the actual Frankie…)

She also has to go back to the shelter today for treatment, as she’s not 100% a Truly until her spay (which if anyone has tips for care after I’m all ears) - hopefully she doesn’t get excited and think she’s finally getting away from us… sorry Frankie Cat, you’re one of us now. Even if you do rip my feet to shit. 

T H I S  W E E K ' S  J A M . . .

Back in my Sons of Anarchy feels as I finally work my way through season seven (no spoilers or talk please, I've gone this long without a spoiler, I'd like to finish it out the same way)

Happy Sunday all! Here's to another great week! Feel free to share your favourite posts, stories, thots and whatever and never hesitate to tag me in it 💕

[shadowjackery]

This post was brought to you by Parts of the Body and the letter H.

Continuing the train of thought from: https://www.tumblr.com/shadowjackery/709801424218963968/pick-a-live-action-movie-keep-one-human-actor?source=share

Design sketches and casting notes after the cut.

The token human is Hamlet. This seems obvious to me.

Bert and Ernie are Guildenstern and Rosencrantz. Their doppelgänger are what-not muppets, who turned out looking a lot like Andy Candy and Eddie Spaghetti from "Captain Vegetable" on Sesame Street.

Gonzo is The Player. Again, this feels perfect to me. The death-challenging artiste! Gonzo turned out to be surprisingly tricky to figure out how to draw well.

Piggy would demand to be Queen Gertrude, so Kermit has to be King Claudius. Mirroring her, Link Hogthrob in drag is the Player Queen. And for the Player King, Camilla, also in drag, to stay in theme.

I never got around to casting the Ghost of Hamlet's Father. Maybe Rolf? You could talk me into Uncle Deadly, or a bedsheet ghost, or that Jim Henson muppet they used in the ol' jugband numbers, or the hideous CG recreation of Jim himself with a machine AI voice.

In Stoppard's text, the youngest player, "Alfred", plays a Queen. I changed that here: Elmo plays Alfred who plays a Princess, mirror to Ophelia, and for her I just made up a girl monster because the girl monsters on Sesame Street seem too young to be fooling around with college boys. Though, yes, now that you mention it, Elmo is also far too young to be pimped out by Gonzo, but that part of the play is supposed to be transgressive, and anyway have you ever seen Elmo interviewed on a late night show? He and Gonzo would love the joke. They would conspire to make it somehow worse.

Last minute thought that I never drew: Ophelia could also be played by a fish, because she drowns.

Laertes: "...How?!" Claudius: "Well, it's too complicated to go into here. This play is long enough." Laertes: "I understand entirely. Shall we continue?" Claudius: "Please."

Sam the American Eagle is perfect for Polonius, and I invented a different bird for his player equivalent.

Grover plays Laertes cranked up to 11, and I think that's Harry Monster or someone similar as his player equivalent.

Scooter could be Horatio. I did think of Rizzo the Rat at one point, but he would not put up with Hamlet's shit for very long, while Scooter would shrug and roll with it, which is more true to the text.

I never quite figured out castings for Osric and Fortinbras, who don't appear in these drawings, because I honestly like Sweetums for either part and couldn't decide. I think I tend toward making him Osric ("A palpable hit!"), because the Swedish Chef playing the Norwegian Prince could be hilarious:

Fortinbras: "...Wat du hey?!"

Horatio: "What is it ye would see? If aught of woe or wonder, cease your search."

Fortinbras: "De chicky cri un hackensvacken! O Morp, Wat festen toward yer unendinlindinlindin cell Ther thoo soo muchen kingen in un kaboom So bludili hast stroock?"

(My apologies to Danes, Swedes, and Norwegians...)

And, naturally, the Gravediggers who gleefully desecrate the grave of a certain much-despis'd court jester couldn't be anybody else but Statler and Waldorf.

[streatfeild]

@larryrickard and @spineless-lobster tagged me a million years ago, thank you!! <3

List 5 favourite shows (in no particular order) and answer questions accordingly.

01. The Thick of it

02. Without a Trace

03. Hap and Leonard

04. Lost

05. Yonderland

Who is your favourite character in 2?

Danny (big surprise lol)

Who is your least favourite character in 1?

It’s hard to tell bc those characters weren’t designed to be liked so uh they all suck in their own way. But in a good way you know? But uhhhhh I‘d say John Duggan I guess?

What’s your favourite episode of 4?

UHHHHHMMMM. OKAY. "Lockdown" is obviously an all-time fave but there are better eps in the later seasons like "Greatest hits", "Dr Linus" and (unpopular opinion) "The End". There are too many to choose :(

What’s your favourite season of 5?

Gotta be season 3 🫡

What’s your favourite relationship in 3?

If we‘re talking platonic then yes. Hap & Leonard. What a duo what a dynamic so well written i‘m actually going insane over them btw

What is your anti-relationship in 2?

MARTIN/SAM just LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!! (Martin/Sam/Danny though? Yes please)

How long have you watched 1?

I think i started watching this march, and i haven’t stopped since

How did you become interested in 3?

i‘ve been watching enrique’s entire filmography and. He‘s in it. And BOY am i glad bc i would’ve regretted not seeing this masterpiece of a show. (please watch it if you haven’t)

Who is your favourite actor in 4?

Michael Emerson takes it. BOY does he take it

Which show do you prefer 1, 2 or 5?

god. I‘m so sorry but i‘ll have to go with my awful copaganda show :( wat it is

Which show have you seen more episodes of, 1 or 3?

23 vs 18 episodes, and i‘ve been rewatching ttoi on loop for months, whereas i‘ve only done a partial rewatch of H&L

If you could be anyone from 4, who would you be?

Bernard or Vincent probably lol. Just chillin'

How would you kill off your favourite character in 5?

Vex? You want me to murder Vex? Okay. Killed very dramatically by Negatus (they‘re divorced your honour), the whole cliché list: dying in his arms "i always loved you" yadda yadda (sorry)

Would a 3/4 crossover work?

Honestly? It‘d be so epic. Hap & Leonard on The Island. Yes please

Pair two characters in 1 who would make an unlikely, but strangely okay couple.

*points at adam/phil* THEM!!!!!!!!!!

Overall, which show has the better cast, 3 or 5?

You‘re not making me choose here, right? RIGHT?

[voidscreaming77]

AUUUUUUGH FUCKING AUGH FUCKFUCK IT FUCKING SHIT I FUCKING ATE HATE HATE FUCKIG SLAMMNG MY HEAD INTO THE WALL FUCKING I WANT TO SCREAM INS THE DIRT I FUKIGNNF FUCK AAAAAAAAAEHEBGKS PNCHIGN MYSELK PUNCHING THE WALL PUNCHING THE WALL KICKING SHIT THROWING SHTI I FUCKING HATE WHAT THE FUCK IS THE MATTER ID RATHER YOU SAY SHIT TO MY FACE DONT FUCKING JUST FUCKING SIENTLY OR BEHIND ME BE ANNOYED AND TIRED AND SICK AND TIRED OKAY HOW ABOUT TELL ME I GET THAT SOMETIMES IM TOO FUCKING MUCHAND I DONT SHUT THE FUCK UP ITS HOE I EXPRESS THAT I AM HAPPY TO KNOWN YOU I TALK THATS HOW I EXPRESS THAT IM HAPPY I TALK AND SEND THINGS CUS I WANT TO JUST INTERACT AND IM SORRY THAT’S SO ANNOYING TO YOU. SORRY THAT YOUVE GOTTEN TIRED OF ME CUS U ALL , ALL OF YOU, DECIDED ON ONE. FUCKING. THING. THAT YOU ALL CAN DO TOGETHER, ITS ALL YOU FUCKING DO ANYMORE, AND I TRIED BUT I JSUT CANT DO IT, BUT I STILL TRY TO GET INVOLVED HOW I CAN SO YOU DONT ALL FORGET THAT I EXIST AND DECIDE YOU’D BE JUST AS HAPPY IF I WASN’T HERE ANYMORE CUS I JSUT DNT EVEN REGISTER AS A PERSON YOU LOOK FOREWARD TO KNOWING IS AROUND. I TRY AND GET INVOLVED IN WHAT WAYS I CAN AND IT FEELS LIEK YOU HATE IT. YOU HATE THHAT IM HERE YOU HATE IT SO MUCH ITS SO MUCH EASIER WHEN IM NOT THERE TRYING TO BE INVOLVED SORRY YOU FEEL THAT WAY, U CANT TELL ME THAT???? YU CANT JUST SAY THAT WAY BEFORE NOW BEFORE I GOT SO UNBEARABLE THAT YOU JUST, ALL THAT YOU DO, IS NOD AND MHM ABSENTLY WHEN I TALK? WHEN IM TRYING SO HARD TO BRING UP THINGS I KNOW YOOU ALL LOVE SO I CAN HEAR YOU LITERALLY SYA A N Y T H I NG TO ME, SO I CAN SEE YOU GIVE ME A SINGLE SCRAP OF INTERACTION.?ID RATHER FUCKIGN KNOW THANSK INSTEAD OF WASTING ALL MY TIME AND EFFORT AND I FUCKING PUT SO MUCH EFFORT IN TRYING TO SHOW YOU THAT I LOVE YOU ALL AND YOU MAKE ME HAPPY, I WANT TO HEAR YOU TALK ABOUT LITERALLY ANNYTHING, I JUST WANT TO KNOW IM WORTH EVEN USING AS AN EXCUSE TO TALK ABOUT YOURSELF, I TRY AND MAKE CHANCES JUST TO HEAR YOU TALK, I TRY SO HARDD AND I SPEND SO MUCH TIE TRYING AND I DONT GET A FUCKING SCRAP OF EFFORT BACKK. THANKS. FUCK YOU. I DONT WANT YOU TO NOT CARE ABOUTME ANY MORE I CARE ABOUT ALL OF YOU I DOONT KNOW WAT ILL DO IF YOURE OKAY WITH ME STOPPING TRYING. BUT I DONT THINK YOOU’RE TRYNG AT ALL IN RETURN AND IT HURTS A LOT. ITS THE ONLY THING I CAN SEE ANYMORE. EVERYWHERE I LOOK I SEE THE WAYS YOURECOMPELTELY INDIFFERENT TO MY EFFORT AND LOVE. WE LIVED THROUGH A WAR TOGETHER AND YOU ARE OKAY WITH ME NO MAKING A SINGLE RIPPLE IN YOUR EXISTENCE. LITERALLY ALL BECAUSE I CANT FORCE MYSELF TO DO SOMETHING I HATE EVERYTIME I JUST WANT TO FEEL LIKE I MATTER TO ANY O YOU ANYMORE, BECAUSE I WONT SACRIFICE MY OTHER PASSIONS SO THAT CAN TAKE UP SPACE I NEED FOR THINGS I PUT MY SOUL INTO, I DO EVERYTHIGN I POSSIBLY CAN TO FIND THINGS I LIKE ABOUT WHAT YOU ALL LIKE SO IT CAN BE ENOUGH, AND YOU CANT BE *BOTHERED* TO GIVE ME A CRUMB OF YOUR CARE OUTSIDE OF IT?. NO I DONT WANT TO WATCH YOU ALL BOND WITHOUT ME STOP ASKING IF I WANT TO WAATCH PLEASE PLEASE PLEAS. YES ID LIKE YOU TO LET ME WATCH ANYWAY BECAUSE II CANT STOP TRYING TO BE LOVED IN RETURN. I FEEL LIKE IM LOSING ALL OF YOU. YES ID LIKE TO PASSIVELY WATCH YOU ALL LOVE EACHOTHER SOMPLETELLY SEPERATE FROM AND WITHOUT ME. I WILL JUST BE THE VOYEUR. I CANT STAND IT ANYMORE BUT IM NOT DONE CLINGING TO THE ILLUSION OF FEELING OF BEING THERE THAT IT GIVES ME. I CAN LIVE WITH BEING THE VOYEUR FOR NOW. PLEASE STOP OFFERING TO LET ME WATCH. I MISS ALL OF MY OLDEST AND CLOSEST FRIENDS.

[gildedmuse]

Why is THIS and the new opening the reason I want to catch up with the show the most?

It's like now that I don't have my work friends or family to watch with me (genetic diseases! So much fun!) I have no interest except hen people post pictures of Zoro.

Then I'm immediately interested.

What I need is people willing to sit around and watch the new OP episodes with me - so I have that encouragement to wat h through the pain - but also it would help if the animators and Oda made it MOSTLY Zoro.

Like, help a dying girl out. More Zoro in the openings,episodes and eye catches please.

OMG WE ACTUALLY HAVE NEW EYECATCHERS!! ACTUAL NEW ONES!!!!! FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2016!!!!

And look at the crew being all soft with each other 😭🥹

We SHOULD have gotten a filler of them just chilling either after the Raid or before Egghead

[essentialalls]

Guyssss for fuck sake pls PLEASE I thought I left Bryan Fuller where he was right there. I DONT LIKE THIS CHRYSSY WAKE UPPP, Charles and Jan, pls wat, I mean ok, but pls wat again, wat. Im so scared of this storyline, you dont even know.

Nononononono what is happening pls pls.

Only Murders went from being my comfort show, to the show that disintegrates my life from week to week (affectionate).

AND WHAT WAS THAT T H A T FINALE PLOT TWIST

OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG

i need therapy

And Alice? Idk maybe she is not the killer but she knows something. I have been saying this to myself since ep 1. For me Alice is (at least) the artist that maybe helped creating the painting's fake. Idk guys, this is truly a weekly torture.

[author-luna]

My writing ideas (2/?)

<< Previous | Part 2 | Next >>

Ayo hi? I didn’t expect myself to be updating this series so soon 😂

anywho, a longer one this time with only 1 idea but it’s more fleshed out then the short synopsis style of the previous ones

Fandom: Trash of the counts family

There are 2 children, wait what?!

Brace yourself for a shit show

Literally, I had this idea 2 days ago at like 3 am and I’ve just gotten to write it out and work on it

Is it gonna make sense? No, who do you think am i??

It’s gonna be damn long cuz I kinda fleshed this out more then the others

Okay, so the idea was that after everything settles down, everyone low-key decides that Cale won’t be doing anything for at least a year or so

Cale has no objections of course, cuz that’s his goal

So, the first few weeks go by peacefully and Cale thinks ‘man, I could get used to this way of living. Nothing can get in my way now, right?’

Baby, no, you’re soo wrong

One day, as Ron goes to wake his young master up, he finds 2 children in the bed instead of one

Yes, you’ve read it right, 2 little red haired boys who look like the reflection of each other

One of the little shits boys is our Cale/KRS and the other one is OG!Cale

Somehow, OG!Cale travelled from the past of a different world into this world’s future

He’s terrified of course, because who the hell are these people and oh god one of them has a sword someone save me

As for our Cale/KRS, his body and mind got regressed into the age of 7

he has OG!Cale’s memories as well as part of his own from his childhood

Everyone freaks out since there are 2 self sacrificing idiots now and one of them looks ready to bite them if they even look into their direction

OG!Cale and KRS lowkey act like siblings since they’re both kinda stuck here with these weird people

KRS takes on an older brother type of role towards OG!Cale and he can’t explain it but he feels like this little boy that looks like him deserves a lot of happiness

OG!Cale is kinda weirded out and panics because he has no idea what to do, but seeing the other boy take care of him kinda makes it easier for him to stay calm

Deruth is lowkey an ass here because he feels a bit too grateful that he doesn’t only have 1, but 2 Cale’s now that he can make up his absence for

But oh boy h boy, imagine his surprise when both Cale’s act cold towards him

Basen and Lily wanna spend time with their little brother (brothers?) but, uh, OG! Cale is shy and scared of them while KRS doesn’t take anyone’s bullshit

At some point they drop them off at Alberu’s and he gets stuck as a babysitter but it was surprisingly fun for him

Erhaben is grandpa ™️ and he fees so attached to both Cale’s

For everyone’s sake, one of them is called Cale while they call the other one Cal (Cale is KRS while Cal is OG!Cale)

The kids are kinda curious as to how their father figure. Is gonna act and they’re pleased to know that he still kinda acts like himself, just a lot ore reserved and rude

Cuteness overload is guaranteed

Everyone gathers together to figure out wat to do, and suddenly they get contacted by 2 gods

The God of Death as well as the Goddess of Time are the one’s responsible for this set up

They explain that OG!Cale is from a parallel universe and that the soul residing within their Cale is also a bit different then the one that was living here at that age

Upon questioning why they brought OG!Cale here and why KRS got regressed, they explain that there is an inter dimensional disaster awaiting everyone, and the only people who could stop it are these 2 children, and being in this form makes it easier for them to full fill the mission since children have a “purer” soul and mind

Everyone is understandably enraged and they want to know how they can bring OG!Cale back to his universe and how to undo the regression on KRS

The assho gods explain that in order for everything to go back to its original way, they have to go through different memories of Cale in a world where they are twins, find the thing that isn’t correct and change the outcome in order to obtain parts on how to stop the disaster from happening (I swear the actual scene in my head is way better and cooler then the explanation I’m giving)

So, they both go into a deep slumber type of thing so that they can fix the memories of Cale and KRS, and unbeknownst to them, everyone is able to watch them and their memories

After they fix the first memory they receive a page and some text appears on it, but they can’t read

They keep relieving those fake memories and some are pretty harsh

It takes a lot of effort to change them, but at the end, the page is filled with text and they’re eager to read it

Well from here out I’lll come up with something, I swear-

Anywho give me feedback on this idea pls, it’s the most detailed one but I’m still very unsure about this one

[adoodleintime]

thanks for the tag!

Last TV show: My little sister is sick so we were watching little Einsteins

Favorite color: pink :33333

Sweet, Spicy, or Savory: Spicy. I crave Cajun Alfredo and guacamole as we speak.

Last album: the A Hat in Time soundtrack. 10/10 I adore that game

Last film: i dont really wat h movies much haha. Beauty and the Beast was playing in the waiting room I was chilling in a couple hours ago.

Last thing I looked up online: Table A for my stats homework hehe

Relationship status: can a guy PLEASE ask me to the dance I don't wanna go stag :(((((((

Current obsession: minecraft my best friend minecraft

tagging anyone who wants to join!

The People I'd Like To Get To Know Better Tag Game

Tagged by the lovely @lucifers-horror-harem (thank you Lottie, this was a welcome distraction~)

Last Song/Album: "Alive" from the Jekyll & Hyde musical soundtrack

Favorite color: blue or black. Technically both. I love blues, especially deeper blues but black has also always been my color. I've gravitated towards it since I was young. (I was born to be goth rofl.)

Sweet, spicy or savory: this one is weird. In the last five years, especially this past year, my tolerance for anything sweet has drastically diminished. I still love savory stuff but I have to be in the mood. And my spice tolerance has increased in a weird balancing act to the growing intolerance for sweets? So...spicy, I guess?

Last TV show: starting a Gravity Falls rewatch baybeeeee

Last film: Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End

Last thing I looked up online: I'm honestly not sure

Relationship status: Married

Current obsession: Twisted Wonderland (secondary obsession is still horror media, and Disney properties are sort of a side focus/satellite thing as a result of the TWST obsession; I cannot stress enough this silly little mobile game became both a SpIn and a hyperfixation in record time and it's been going strong since late October 2023 and shows no signs of stopping. Also, though it technically falls under the umbrella of horror media, thanks The Magnus Protocol for reigniting the magpod hyperfixation)

No pressure tags: @changeofheart69 @tixdixl @inmateofthemind @oathofoaks (yes I know that I know you guys already and you're my besties but I wanted to make sure you knew I was thinking about you and wanted to include you) @silverscribe87 @trensu @horrorobsessor @blithesharem @thehollowwriter @snailsrneat @theleechyskrunkly @rainesol and anyone who wants to grab this tag and run with it is free to!

[muwur]

snapchat headcanons

✧ hc’s ✧ for using snapchat w ur boi toi ft. the pretty setter squad

❧ gn reader

✎ 3.1k words

a/n: kinda a combo of how they use sc and the kinds of snaps they send you! along w wat u send them, and uh... dating stuf n shenanigans? texting/snapping habits? my fantasies? IDEK ANYMORE EOFHEFJ

this was born from the recesses of my mind , which desired nothing mor than snapchats from suga , us sending cute selfies , others bein dumb n chaotic , no context videos , n him snapping me photos of some mangoes on sale he said he’ll buy for me DXX it’s too late for me now

doing research on hq bois and surfing thru sc features (im just now realizing theres quite a bit?? im hoping i address most of them at some point lolol) instead of real life tings aHHhhhHAHA

requests: open! will be working on a suga one i got, dw, requester!

sugawara

✧ sends good morning and good night snaps

✧ so he’s rlly good at keeping streaks, probs has the longest ones (one of them being y’alls streak)

✧ posts tidbits of volleyball practice on his story every once in a while

✧ snaps you pics of his sleeping teammates when they’re coming back to school after a long day of matches , adding a single ‘❤️’ as a caption

✧ he will also create colorful masterpieces on all of them

✧ gives daichi a santa beard, tanaka a squiggly stache (i imagine it to look like spongebob n patrick’s seaweed ones now that were mEN), n kageyama sum angry brows,,, wait he already has them lolol u good der kags

✧ posts a picture of you when you’re hanging out, captioning it: “🥰“

✧ has conversations with you purely via snaps

✧ ranges from casual chats and checking up on u to crackwhoring ( ** indicates the photo, while the “” quotes indicate the caption, all snaps are italicized, otherwise its regular dialogue)

✧ suga: *peace sign* “hey sweetheart, how r u?”

✧ you: *pics of homework* “ahh, drowning in school ;-; i cant wait for this week to be over fghjkl”

✧ suga: *close up with :o on his face* “let’s study together tmrw!”

✧ or

✧ suga: *complete darkness* “its 3 am n i cant sleep”

✧ you: *the top half of your head, laying on a pillow* “ ;( aw babe. do u want me to send something to help u sleep?”

✧ suga: *still in darkness* “y u still up?? go sleep. n 🥺 yes pls”

✧ you: *snaps pics of feet* “that’ll be 50 bucks, pay up” 

✧ suga: *darkness remains* “can we make a trade instead? i promise to make it worth ;)”

✧ ok now u BOTH cant sleep (im sry my crackheading be acting up around 2am eeryday, i stan a mischievous suga--)

✧ video chats (in the darkness lol) instead until you both pass out (im not in luv u r 😭)

✧ super down to take filtered selfies w you

✧ does all the silly ones with you (things like ’angry face’ or the frog one)

✧ but also rlly digs lookin cute with you using some heart crowns, y’all an aesthetic (n crakhead) duo fosho

✧ def subscribes to life hacks and tries them out himself, has a 50% success rate

kageyama

✧ doesn’t rlly use snapchat too much

✧ but when he does

✧ will either send you a picture to indicate he’s at volleyball practice (wow wat a sexi lookin gym floor)

✧ or some random picture of whatever he’s doing at the moment (*drinking milk*)

✧ this is mostly in order to save streaks

✧ he’s so bad at streaks

✧ “why does it matter?? what’s the point of sending just black screens or whatever’s in front of you at the moment??”

✧ can’t keep a consistent streak for more than 3 days and also doesn’t care (until hinata challenges him to see who can have the longer one)

✧ when you send him videos of him playing, he really focuses on them to try to improve his technique. asks you to send those vids to him (assuming u saved them, which u did)

✧ but when you look over his shoulder when he’s watching a video and give him some compliment (“i recorded at the perfect moment! that was a really good set, kageyama!”), he gets a bit flustered

✧ gets even more flustered but pretty happy whenever you post videos on your story showing karasuno winning some points with captions like:

✧ “footage of the legendary quick >.>” or “karasuno crows flyin high!” or “these bois make my heart 😭 im so proud”

✧ you WILL catch him off guard in photos, using filters that surrounds his head w/ emojis like 🥺💖🥰💘

✧ you also put these on your story (to his dismay)

✧ ppl comment on these mor than anything else (n for those who dont rlly kno kageyama, theyre kinda surprised to him like this)

✧ hinata snickers “hey kageyama you look pretty good here--”

✧ takes some selfies with you, mostly cuz you want them

✧ saves them after u send them over (n secretly cherishes them)

✧ occasionally watches his subscriptions, they’ll usually involve sports, mostly volleyball (who woulda guessed)

✧ you use his bitmoji to test out random facial expressions you would never see him wear

✧ you: “can you smile and wink like this? act like you’re the obnoxious charming guy in a shojo.”

✧ will actually attempt, but it looks so bad that you die inside and he never wants to try again cuz of ur laughing outburst (you: “😭😭 bb im sorry i couldnt help it”)

oikawa

✧ literally sends you anything and everything

✧ morning bathroom selfie to show off how good his hair came out that day, saying:

✧ “he has risen”

✧ or “i woke up like this”

✧ and my favorite, “you’re lucky you get this content for frEE”

✧ selfies with iwa, who just looks annoyed and exasperated at the camera

✧ sends you pics of his lunch and snacks (“bet u wish u had milk bread too”)

✧ always packs extra milk bread so he could convince you to stay at his practice after school--

✧ FILTERSS

✧ I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENUF

✧ will either use the filters that make him kayooottt (cute)

✧ loves the ones named ‘hearts,’ ‘soft,’ ‘peach,’ ‘butterfly cheeks,’ vsco filters LOL, etc

✧ uses ‘big mouth’ when he feelin a bit sASSY; also loves to use this one when he rants, it channels his inner valley girl

✧ sometimes he’ll be snacking or drinking something while he does so (“hey guys today im gonna eat these milk buns from my favorite bakery and this bomb orange juice and complain about this little kid who talked smack to me earlier and almost made me cry--”)

✧ takes cute selfies with you, is an aesthetic selfie king, puts them on his story to show off he’s hangin with you

✧ but on your story you only post the ones he looks bad in LOL

✧ has separate stories for his every need, some r private (and lucky you, ur included in all of them)

✧ titles them ‘mean things iwa said to me today,’ ‘ranting hotbox + mukbangs,’ ‘a day in the life of oikawa,’ ‘volleyball 🏐,’ ‘unpopular opinions,’ etc. 

✧ fitting room photoshoots lol

✧ “y/n, what do you think of this??” “and this?” “oOH WHAT ABOUT THIS??”

✧ ends up calling you through video chat so you can live critique his choices

✧ “oikawa, please no, i can’t be seen with you in public if you wear those--”

✧ also changes his bitmoji’s outfits from time to time, hopes you’ll notice, but you don’t LOL (oikawa: ;((((((( )

kenma

✧ uses sc usually just to reply to messages ppl send him

✧ indifferent about streaks, but keeps a few with ppl he’s closer to

✧ mindlessly plays the snapchat games with you, finds some of them kinda cute

✧ you both made his bitmoji for him, dressing his up in the orange cat suit

✧ you also helped make kuroo’s and put his in the black cat suit to match--

✧ snaps you every time he gets a new game, starts playing it, and once he finishes

✧ started to post some gameplays and reviews on his sc story (might as well add them to sc since he was already on other social platforms), and ended up amassing a large following

✧ follows the tech and gaming stories on sc

✧ as well as the ones with cute animals--

✧ open to selfies with you, usually wears a calm expression and holds up a peace sign

✧ even occasionally sticks his tongue out

✧ his story is occasionally heavily bombarded with candids of him w/ pretty sc filters, all taken by you

✧ but of all the filters, you love using the clout glasses on him

✧ especially when he’s just minding his own business

✧ “kenma, in his tru habitat” when hes cocooned in a blanket

✧ “kenma, on his way to steal yo manz” while on his way to the bathroom

✧ “kenma, next iron chef. watch out gordon” as he’s cooking instant ramen

✧ “kenma” n das it

✧ but he thinks it meme-y so he lets you do whatever you want, kinda digs it

✧ you end up dedicating your snap story to memes of kenma and the nekoma volleyball team. ppl are in it for the shits n giggles n hot bois

✧ you later discover someone else did the same thing with their volleyball team filled with hot bois from shiratorizawa, and you befriend tendou and share funni internet tings

akaashi

✧ 99% of his photos include either you or bokuto or both

✧ bokuto spams akaashi’s story and contact list with selfies and videos of himself using weird filters, often gets you to join him

✧ has several streaks, but will send something with more substance than a black screen or his bedroom window

✧ will usually involve smthng that just happened to him or smthing he saw, like:

✧ “a kind older lady offered me some apples in return for helping her”

-or:

✧ “how do i break the news to bokuto that the yaikniku place he’s been wanting to go to for the past week ,,, is closed today”

✧ o n let’s not leave out:

✧ “is it possible to conjure a ghost using a wooden spatula, ketchup, and a chalk drawn hexagram? bokuto’s been paranoid ever since he tried last night and i dont know what to tell him. seriously, help”

✧ looks through stories occasionally, comments whenever bokuto makes questionable decisions

✧ also comments on whatever you’ve posted. his words range from “you’re cute” to “why,” depending on the content

✧ ppl know when y’all are hanging out cuz he’ll post smthing to indicate he’s with you, usually it’s some candid and you’re not paying attention

✧ appreciation posts for you as well! esp if you got him something, like onigiri or his fav, Nanohana no Karashiae , for lunch! (akaashi: *snaps a pic of his food* “thank you y/n for feeding me”)

✧ prefers video calling over texting/snapping whenever possible tho

✧ occasionally reminisces thru his sc memories

✧ enjoys the flashback feature and will send them to you and bokuto (cuz they’re about y’all anyway lolol)

✧ also has secretly saved a bunch of selfies of himself, consists of him trying out a lot of the filters (he feelin himself)

✧ you, one day, looking thru his phone and discovering them: “akaashi, you’re so pretty wtf”

✧ akaashi: “...”

koganegawa

✧ sends you selfies of him before practice

✧ during breaks

✧ and after practice, usually makes a comment about how it went for him that day like:

✧  “i hit a decent toss today and futakuchi actually complimented me!”

✧ that, or:

✧ “i got yelled at 17 times today 😢😩”

✧ has quite a few streaks, his longest ones being with you and hinata

✧ def uses filters

✧ tries out every funny one he finds and sends you videos

✧ “look y/n im an aaaaAALlliiEEENnnNNN oo oo hoo hhhooOOh”

✧ “now im a chicky nuggy!!” (chicken nugget)

✧ also enjoys the doodle feature

✧ but he uses the filter with the clout glasses unironically--

✧ usually when smth good happens to him and he feels happy and/or cool about it

✧ “just beat the boss in this game on my 69th try B)”

✧ “kogane, that’s--”

✧ plays sc games with you and thinks bitmojis r cool

✧ kinda sad he cant find a hair option that matches him tho lolol rip

✧ you: “you hair’s just,,, unique,,,”

✧ subscribed to anything sports and fitness, as well as pop culture so he can stay in the loop

✧ also watches everyone else’s stories, pointing out whenever he sees smthing cool and/or interesting

✧ “woahh, karasuno’s at nationals right now! i wish we could’ve won, but next year for sure!!”

✧ you encourage him at all his games, hyping him up irl and online

✧ “koganegawa: best setter 😍!!”

✧ luckily you didnt record the parts he completely messed up LOL

semi

✧ before going out with you, snaps you a pic of his casual outfit like:

✧ semi: “does this look ok”

✧ you: “babe you look great, tendou was just messing with you”

✧ will make unwanted appearances on tendou’s snap and complains to you about them

✧ “i didnt consent to being part of his meme page” and

✧ “okay, but he didn’t only have to share all the moments i messed up--”

✧ also indifferent about streaks but will do them

✧ sometimes sends snaps/streaks indicating he’s practicing his music

✧ when you see these you usually ask him to send you vids or if you can come over n watch

✧ initially is a bit shy about it but he loves what he does and you and knows you’re genuinely interested and supportive so he agrees

✧ secretly rlly enjoys having you as his personal audience

✧ lowkey into asmr, like the soap cutting shit as well as chewing crunchy things

✧ also watches food porn and clips of mukbangs, then can’t resist going on youtube and watching the whole thing

✧  “y/n, can we try this, it looks so good--”

✧ will also often watch oikawa’s stories, especially his ‘ranting hotbox + mukbangs,’ and makes comments about him being an idiot

✧  “this kid he’s talking about is a savage”

✧ but admits they’re quite entertaining

✧ just looks serious in all the selfies you take with him

✧ you: “can you look like you’re enjoying yourself?”

✧ semi: “i look cooler like this tho”

✧ sc memories filled with shenanigans from you and the volleyball team, doodles, and mirror selfies with him experimenting diff looks (you: “tendou, you got him way too concerned about this”)

✧ also enjoys showing off he’s with you, taking a short video of you when you hang out

✧ you: “semi, i look bad right now”

✧ semi: “but you can never look bad”

✧ you: “🥺 bb”

✧ viewers: “aw”

✧ shiratorizawa: “can he be this nice with us LOL”

shirabu

✧ his main mode of communication with you is mostly through the regular messaging app, so he doesn’t use sc too much

✧ also doesn’t care for streaks and is bad at keeping them

✧ will answer to you or his senpais rather soon tho

✧ but lets all his other notifications pile up a bit before finally going thru them

✧ goes through the snaps he receives really fast, spending like 2 seconds each to look at them cuz aint nobody got time for dat

✧ doesn’t even rlly open goshiki’s LOL

✧ you have fun using filters on him and taking videos while he’s just doing his own thing peacefully like studying

✧ it takes him a second to notice and when he finally looks up, he just gives you an exasperated look

✧ cue you cracking up with laughter bc the filter finally shows up on his face

✧ his eyes and mouth are now on mike wazowski

✧ that, or his face becomes so disturbingly moRPhed like an alien

✧ caption: “ken-chan, my future medical man 😍”

✧ “y/n, please, this is like the 7th time in the last 20 minutes--”

✧ finally convinced him to take a study break and hang out with you

✧ which usually consists of snacking and light banter while you lay your head on his lap

✧ and scrolling through snapchat stories and showing him what everyone else is up to and cool things you’re subscribed to

✧ “loooook, dr. miami’s doing another butt job! is this the line of work you’re studying so hard for?”

✧ “no, it’s really not”

✧ is actually very soft with you and likes having the photos and vids for memories

atsumu

✧ sends you snaps where his brother looks bad, captioning it:

✧ “this is evidence that im the hotter twin”

✧ likewise, osamu sends you snaps where atsumu looks even worse

✧ like, the mans passed out, looking rekt and open mouthed, drool seeping into his pillow

✧ osamu: “u still have time to break up with him”

✧ also lucky for you, atsumu also loves to take unflattering photos of you and send them to you randomly at like 2 am

✧ you: “nani tf when did you even take this??”

✧ usually posts a snap while he’s out somewhere like at a match, the gym, outside on a run, a party, or just hanging out with you or his frens

✧ however, makes sure you look good if you show up on his story cuz he wants to show you off

✧ doesn’t really care for streaks, but has a lott

✧ but also has a tON of unopened snaps

✧ is the type to send just a black screen n call it a day, or maybe spice it up by sending a pic of the sexi gym floor (a comeback) w his shoe in the corner

✧ will, however, consistently respond to you and kinda looks forward to ur snaps (secretly hopes you show ur face)

✧ but when you dont:

*in class*

✧ atsumu: *a smirk on his face* “your content’s kinda dry today” 

✧ you: *your sexi desk* “my nudez ain’t free, i demand compensation”

✧ atsumu: *grasped his chin in thought, but angled the cam up bc he needa hide his phone in class lolol* “what if i... take you out on a romantic excursion”

✧ you: * your face but with ‘sausage’ filter* “🥵🥵🥵🥵 yessir, what u want”

✧ rlly only wants to have pics of your face wat a closeted sOFTIE

✧ likes to have content on his flashbacks

✧ usually has other social media sources to keep up to date with things

✧ actually rlly digs using sc filters, mostly ones that’ll make him look like a queen

✧ captions a selfie of you two like: “me >>>>>>> y/n”

✧ but nearly everyone who comments on it is like: “i think you flipped the sign, bro 🤥”

✧ judges ppl who are into soap cutting asmr (you will never hear the end of it if you also like it)

a/n: sc kinda dying for me, my use went from suga to an atsumu to like nearly nonexistent LOL

also o gawd i already have ideas here n there for a pt 2 so stay tuned fjxnwfesd hope it takes me less long cuz this one took me fkin foreva LOL

idk y i made semi like mukbangs but i feel like he’d be rlly into them--

[iamvegorott]

Filling In The Blanks

Welcome to; Veggie was thinking about Ethan meeting his Ego like Mark and Sean would and working on her own idea of the basic universe of the Ego Universe. Let me know if y’all liked this! 

Summary: All Ethan wanted was a quick snack and he finds a stranger that looks just like him on his kitchen floor and he's introduced to a strange world that he is now a part of

----------------------------------------------------

Filling In The Blanks

“You’re good with me bringing Spencer over tonight, right?” Ethan asked into his phone as he stepped out of his bedroom.

“Dude, I’ve told you that you’re always fine to bring Spencer.” Mark chuckled from the other end. 

“I know, I know. I just gotta be sure, you know?” Ethan scratched at his neck. “Do you want me to bring anything?” 

“I got this. I offered to make dinner so I got all of it all taken care of.” 

“I’m not sure if I trust your cooking.”

“Ay! My cooking is fucking fire. It’s gonna make you lose your shit with how amazing it is.” Ethan started to laugh as Mark went off. “It’s gonna make Gordon Ramsay look like a lil’ bitch.” 

“The Gordon Ramsay? You might have to tweet him your-Holy fuck!” Ethan cursed and almost dropped his phone when he saw someone sitting in the middle of his kitchen floor. 

“Ethan? You good there? Ethan?” Mark’s voice sounded hollow in Ethan’s head as he stared at the stranger...the stranger that looked just like him. The only difference being blacked-out eyes and odd black lines on his face that traveled down his neck and peeked out from his shirt sleeves. The stranger was mostly curled up, crying and the thing the threw Ethan off the most was that Spencer was laying down next to him, his chin resting on the stranger’s leg. 

“H-Hello?” Ethan’s throat was tight and it made it hard to speak. 

“Ethan? Are you okay? Hello? Ethan!?” Mark’s voice was strained as if he was moving quickly. 

“Hi…” The stranger spoke very softly. 

“Ethan? Ethan, tell me what’s happening.” Mark said with several beeps following. 

“There’s someone in my kitchen,” Ethan said. “They’re just...sitting on my floor and crying.” Ethan found that he was stuck. He wasn’t sure how to react to this. That stranger just looked too much like him, Spencer trusted him, what was going on? 

“What does he look like?” Mark kept as even of a tone as he could. 

“Me,” Ethan said in a flat voice. “He looks...just like me.” 

“Ah fuck.” Mark grunted. “Just stay there, don’t do anything. I’ll be there soon.” 

“Yeah, okay, cool cool, I can-I can totally do that...yep.” Ethan heard the phone call end, but he didn’t move. He wasn’t sure if he should pat his leg to get Spencer to come over to him. He didn’t want to startle the stranger and risk Spencer getting hurt. Mark said to not do anything, why did Mark know what to do? Maybe he was guessing, maybe he knew something Ethan was unaware of. 

“I see we have a new one.” 

“Wat in the fuck!?” Ethan screamed when what appeared to be Mark was suddenly next to him. “Mark? Why are you dressed like Dark? Were you shooting a special video? I thought you were cooking? What-” 

“Please, stop.” ‘Mark’ asked with a sigh. “I can not keep up with that energy at the moment, I have enough of that to deal with back at the Manor.” Mark came in through the door not long after that.

“Dark, I said to wait till after I came in before pulling your spooky shit.” Mark scolded.

“Must have been a miscommunication.” Dark sniffed.

“‘Must have been a’-oh fuck off.” Mark huffed. “And is he one of you guys or not?” 

“He is,” Dark stated. 

“I’m definitely dreaming, aren’t I?” Ethan asked with a nervous laugh. “My teeth are probably going to start falling out and my pants are gonna just disappear and an old teacher of mine is gonna show up and tell me about a test I’ve forgotten about and-” 

“If he does not stop I will take his mouth away,” Dark warned. 

“Hurt him and I’ll end you,” Mark warned back. 

“Have I died? Is this purgatory?” Ethan started rubbing one of his arms. 

“Your friend is on the verge of a breakdown.” Dark rolled his shoulder back and Ethan could see that there was red and blue just barely coming from his body, it growing just a bit more as his irritation got stronger. 

“Oh, I’m breaking down, it’s a full breakdown. Someone slap me awake. Someone, please hit me.” 

“Don’t tempt me.” Dark chuckled. 

“Alright, fucko.” Mark moved himself between Dark and Ethan. “Who is that and what do we need to do about it.” 

“We’ve appeared due to the popularity of a character and a, what is annoyingly called, ‘glitch’ in the seams of reality and with one occurring lately-”

“Who. Is. He.” Mark clapped between each word. 

“What character does he have that’s gained popularity?” The blue and red were now glowing much brighter than before. “A character that’s similar to how your audience saw me since I was the first to come through with Wilford.” 

“Blank?” Ethan scrunched his brows. 

“Yeah?” The stranger was now looking at them, using the back of a hand to rub the tears off his face. 

“That’s...Blank? Blankgameplays? The joke ‘evil-me’ thing that I’ve made like two jokes about?” Ethan was really hoping this was a dream. “But what I’ve made of him doesn’t look like that. The eyes, yeah, but the lines?”

“The looks and characteristic of us is a complicated reality shattering conversation that Wilford understands and you don’t want to,” Dark said. “But what do you have of him? Normally ‘canon’ traits tend to stay to give a general idea-”

“I don’t have anything. I have black eyes and a name. I haven’t done the cool deep lore shit like Mark or Sean.” 

“Great. Then I don’t know how stable he is and I’ll need help.” Dark groaned and took out a phone. “Give me just a moment.” 

“What is he doing?” Ethan asked. “What is going on? What is all of this?” 

“I’m pretty sure I know who he’s calling in and the rest I’ll explain later over dinner...for the next week. It’s a lot.” 

“Who fucked up?” 

“Sean?” Ethan wasn’t sure if he wanted to cry or just lay down and not get back up for a while. “No, that’s not Sean that...Anti, right?” 

“Yeah.” Mark popped his lips. 

“Who’s this?” Anti walked past Mark and Ethan as if they weren’t there. 

“Blankgameplays if the full name,” Dark said. 

“And?” 

“And that’s it.” 

“Really? How am I supposed to work with that?” Anto scoffed before looking at Blank, eyes glowing as he looked him up and down. 

“Food? Please?” Blank asked, hand on his stomach. “I hungry, can I eat?” The way Blank spoke got Anti’s shoulders to move down and his long ears to do the same. 

“He’s like Robbie,” Anti said. 

“Okay…” Ethan nodded and looked at Mark. “What?” 

“Dinner, I promise.” Mark patted Ethan’s shoulder. 

“I’ll take him to the House, we’ve dealt with this before and he’ll fit in just fine,” Anti said. “Robbie will finally have someone he can play with.” 

“I’ll tell the others of a new Ego and then you can bring Blank over to meet them so there is no confusion. Would a week be enough time before the meeting?” Dark asked, speaking casually. 

“Yeah, should be plenty.” Anti crouched down in front of Blank. “Hey buddy, we’re going to go get you some food. I know someone that makes a really good waffle.” 

“Waffle?” Blank perked up at that. “With blueberries?” 

“He can give you all the blueberries you want.” Anti placed a hand on Blank’s arm and soon they were gone in a cloud of what looked like green pixels, the green fading away as Ethan spoke. 

“Do I need to do anything?”  Ethan stared at the now empty spot on the ground. 

“Continue as normal and you’ll be called if you're needed,” Dark said. “Mark will give you the contacts you’ll need.” Dark adjusted his tie. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have dinner plans to attend.” 

“Yeah, yeah.” Mark waved towards Dark and Dark was gone in a blink as well, leaving nothing behind as evidence. 

[hey-hamlet]

BNHA AU Ideas : Dad’s Home

Also on AO3!

TL;DR: 

Hisashi isn't abusive or a villain; he's just an asshole. After not having seen the man for a little short of 11 years, Izuku gets reacquainted - much to his displeasure.

Please just Izuku’s dad coming back and being like

"WAT haPPENED"

and izukus like "so I'm in UA now!" and his dad is like "but,,, ur quirkless???" and izuku is "lmao yeah not anymore"

my new quirk is big boi gainz, i’m just rly fucking ripped now. izukus dad is just Shook

like he was coming back to get a divorce bc he's been cheating on inko and he feels bad ab it and he rocks up and he's like "oh my wife got chubby ill just tell her thats why I'm divorcing her" and in walks his fucking BEEFCAKE of a son

nd hes like "ah,,, maybe,,,,, i go,,,, back to america"

izuku like "love you dad" and hisashi is like "is he,,, threatening me" and hisashi is like, awkwardly drinking tea and there is a knock at the door, and izuku goes to get it and hisashi almost fucking chokes as allmight walks in casually chatting w his son

"oh dad, this is yagi-sensei! he the best"

"ni-,,,ce to meet you,,,,, a ll m i g h t "

“aaahhh ur young midoriyas father u must be such a nice man to have raised such a fine young man”

hisashi, thinking abt all the women he’s fucked while he’s been married: “haha yes”

please inko is waving a knife around w her quirk while she casually cooks, all might's smile is pretty creepy to people who aren't used to it and izuku is so polite hisashi has convinced himself izuku is faking it

please bakugou and todoroki show up bc today’s normally when they spar and hisashi sees the son of pro hero endeavour and izukus childhood friend all fucking beefed up and covered in scars and he’s s w e a t i n g

izukus like "oh dad, come with us to the gym, kacchan has gotten super good with his quirk! and todoroki is soooo cool!"

hisashi is like "ha ha maybe n-"

and bakugo and todoroki are like, w a sinister fucking aura "no, i think you should. come."

todoroki s like cracking his knuckles, bakugo is like, grinning waaaayayyy to wide, izuku, inko and yagi are all blissfully unaware of this bc they are idiots izukus just ah maybe i should invite shinsou too <333 he has such a cool quirk !! it’s mind control dad you’ll love him !!

hisashi is ready to fucking d i e

hi consider hisashi and endeavour are cousins and Thats Why Hes Like That

please endeavour is like "oh my cousin working in support is back around, he always had a good quirk but lacked the combat sense to use it. married a weak woman too, not that hes letting that stop him"

and shouto is like " ohH? what,,,, whats his name dad"

dabi and shouto teaming up to kick hisashi in the dick

hi please consider izuku isnt actually as clueless ab hisashi's dickery as he seems but he doesnt wanna upset his mum bc he thinks she still loves him and fuckn,,, inko doesn't wanna get a divorce bc izuku has suffered enough she doesn't need to add "abandoned by father" to his list of issues

allmight is just looking at this and thinking "well this guy is shady as fuck but inko and izuku look happy so ill just add a dash of menace to my smile i guess"

inko already has the divorce papers at the ready, she just ain’t doing anything bc she feels bad for izuku but like every time hisashi open s his mouth she’s just

" Thats,,,, thats  n i c e dear"

"did you know you missed our son's first steps?? : ))))"

"bc,,,, i remember,,, : ) "

izukus clueless ass is just “haha wow moms filling him in all the stuff he missed she must really love him :’)))l

todoroki is like, whispering to bakugo

"have you ever seen this man before in your life"

"yeah. once"

"and???"

"i kicked him right in the nuts because i thought he was coming to kidnap deku, then i kicked him again when i found out it was his garbage dad"

please they are sparring while inko passive-aggressively roasts her husband from the sidelines and allmight watches them so they don't explode each other and izuku is like, while bakugo and todoroki are kicking each other in the teeth

"i,,, i think my father didn't come back bc i was quirkless and I'm scared that he seems to want me now, but i don't want mum to be upset" and yagi is like "my,,, my b o y"

[annelisterofhalifax]

Tues[day] 31 March 1835

7 3/4

11 3/4

V  No kiss Fine morn[in]g F 46 1/2° at 8.28 at w[hi]ch h[ou]r w[e]nt d[o]wn  to Mrs Geo[rge] Robins[o]n, she st[aye]d ab[ou]t an

h[ou]r. Ca[me] to say Dewhirst h[a]d tak[e]n a place at upp[e]r brea, w[a]s go[in]g to ha[ve] skin pits t[he]re and the wat[e]r

w[oul]d be spoilt, s[ai]d perh[aps] it w[a]s well. I sh[oul]d be oblig[e]d to bring an act[ion] and the matt[e]r w[oul]d be

settl[e]d 1 way or oth[e]r next assizes. I explain[e]d ab[ou]t the send[in]g the not[i]ce to quit. S[ai]d I h[a]d nev[e]r

nam[e]d it. Mrs R-[Robinson] s[ai]d M[iste]r Lister, the appraiser h[a]d nam[e]d it and m[u]ch h[a]d been s[ai]d ab[ou]t it. S[ai]d I

c[oul]d n[o]t help doubt[in]g t[hi]s, d[i]d n[o]t kno[w] how M[iste]r List[e]r c[oul]d kno[w]. Mrs R[obinson] seem[e]d satisfi[e]d w[i]th

wh[a]t I s[ai]d and well pleas[e]d. She and all the neighb[ou]rs anx[iou]s for M[iste]r Warburton to get Hipperh[olme] school.

M[iste]r W[ilia]m Priest[le]y wr[ot]e to M[iste]r Th[oma]s Robins[o]n to ask his vote for M[iste]r Carter who is B.A [Bachelor of Arts] b[u]t  

n[o] t M.A[Master of Arts

yet w[ould] ha[ve] been if M[iste]r Huds[o]n h[a]d liv[e]d 2 m[on]ths long[e]r. S[ai]d if M[iste]r Warburt[o]n d[i]d n[o]t get the school

yet, if he chose to rem[ain] at Hipperh[olm]e, Miss Walker and I w[oul]d do all we c[ould] for h[i]m and he w[oul]d ha[ve]

plenty of accomodat[[io]n made for h[i]m. I d[i]d n[o]t ev[e]n kno[w] h[i]m by sight, b[u]t th[ou]ght t[ha]t consider[in]g

V  all the circumst[ance]s he ought to get the school. T[he]n h[a]d Turner the delver [digger] ab[ou]t rag tops and bot[tom]s

to be deliv[ere]d at Mytholm at 1/6 [1 shilling 6 pence] p[e]r y[ar]d, 3 in[ches] thick and wall stones at 2/. [2 shillings] p[e]r 2 horse

load and 1/2 [one shilling 2 pence] p[e]r 1 horse load, and parpoints at 1/. [1 shilling] p[e]r y[ar]d. S[ai]d t[hi]s w[ould] n[o]t do, c[oul]d get

the rag tops and bot[tom]s deliver[e]d at 1/3 [one shilling 3 pence] p[e]r y[ar]d, the wall st[on]e too, too d[ea]r, w[oul]d th[in]k ab[ou]t it.  

Br[eak]f[a]st

at 9.50 in 1/2 h[ou]r hav[in]g set Thorp jun[io]r and his man to pl[an]t out the hazels (620) t[ha]t ca[me] on Sat[urday],  

in my walk bank and in Wellroyd wood und[e]r upp[e]r brea. Good motion loose and  

pretty good one yesterday also after breakfast  next to nothing yesterday and today

on getting up in consequence of eating greens the last three days at dinner I ought to have

had vegetables before. A few min[ute]s w[i]th my fath[e]r, weak b[u]t pret[ty] well t[hi]s morn[in]g. Wr[ote] the

+  ab[ov]e of t[hi]s morn[in]g till 11. R[ea]d fr[om] page 8 to 15 Phil[ip] on the Vit[a]l funct[io]ns] and at 11.20 off w[i]th A-[Ann], left h[e]r at  

Crown[e]st

to look ov[e]r th[in]gs left t[he]re, at 12 saunt[ere]d b[a]ck al[on]g my walk prun[in]g etc etc so[me] ti[me] w[i]th Thorp and his man plant[in]g  

the

hazels on the bank side t[he]re. Ho[me] ab[ou]t 2, talk[in]g to Ch[arl]es How[ar]th till 3 ab[ou]t upper brea wat[e]r etc, no need wh[a]t ev[e]r to

spoil the Low[e]r brea wat[e]r. If any harm done to it, it m[u]st be done on purp[ose]. Heavy rain at 2 3/4, ca[me] in at 3.5.

1835 M[ar]ch

 fr[om] 3.10 to 4 1/2 wr[ote] 3 pages and ends to M-[Mariana] Sor[ry] I h[a]d 

been so long in writ[in]g, w[oul]d n[o]t ma[ke] excuses b[u]t  simply by and 

entr[us]t h[e]r n[o]t to th[in]k me forgetful, anx[iou]s ab[ou]t Percy [Mariana]. ‘I 

ha[ve] th[ou]ght and do th[in]k of you, and often for you, mo[re] ‘mo[re],  daresay 

t[ha]n you imagine. You were right to s[e]nd me the prayer you wr[ote] on the 

9th. Perh[aps] t[ha]t day or rather its annivers[ar]y, will nev[e]r pass by eith[er] of 

us, unnot[e]d. B[u]t let us look up[on] it w[i]th ‘thankfulness. I nev[e]r cease to 

persuade mys[elf] t[ha]t you determ[ine]d wise[l]y, and t[ha]t ti[me] will show you 

mo[re] and ‘mo[re]  clear[l]y how m[u]ch you ha[ve] reas[o]n to be satisfi[ie]d. 

T[he]re is a gleam at hand mo[re] bright t[ha]n I c[a]n ‘bel[ieve]. All will go well 

w[i]th us b[o]th. Sure[l]y Percy [Mariana] will recov[e]r, and sure[l]y I shall soon 

ha[ve] the ‘on[l]y th[in]g want[in]g to my own happ[ine]ss, t[ha]t is, the mo[re] 

perf[ec]t ass[uran]ce of y[our]s. On[l]y keep up y[ou]r sp[iri]ts and hope and 

‘th[in]k all th[in]gs t[ha]t please you best, and I ask no mo[re]. We kno[w] t[ha]t all 

th[in]gs work togeth[e]r for good. ‘it is en[ou]gh. Ga[ve] M-s [Mariana’s] k[i]nd 

mess[a]ge to Adney [Ann], hope it h[a]d n[o]t made h[e]r idle. ‘She oft[[e]n 

‘sp[ea]ks w[i]th gr[ea]t pleas[u]re of our hav[in]g you here. I am n[o]t afr[ai]d of 

y[ou]r lik[in]g h[e]r less well, or being ‘less pleas[e]d t[ha]n you exp[ec]t. If you 

are bent up[on] hav[in]g the paragraph, I m[us]t s[e]nd it you ‘anoth[e]r ti[me]. I 

can[no]t at the mom[en]t, turn of the pap[e]r, in ti[me] for the let[ter] bag of 

tonight, ‘b[u]t the announcement w[a]s , in subst[an]ce, the marr[ia]ge of 

Capt[ai]n Tom Lister of S.H [Shibden Hall] to Miss Ann Walker ‘late of Lidgate. 

On discov[er]y of the hoax, a handso[me] volunteer apol[og]y w[a]s s[e]nt by the 

Ed[ito]r ‘of one of the pap[e]rs; and here the matt[er] end[e]d, f[o]r nobod[y] 

w[a]s annoy[e]d, and nobod[y] car[e]d ab[ou]t it’ My fath[e]r very feeble, my 

a[un]t ‘suffers a ver[y] gr[ea]t deal b[u]t the vit[a]l pow[e]rs seem far fr[om] 

exhaust[e]d’…. Bel[ieve] me alw[a]ys and ver[y] truly ver[y] f[ai]thfully and 

aff[ectionatel]y y[ou]rs A L-[Lister]’ H[a]d s[ai]d my wrist w[a]s spelk[e]d and I 

wr[ote] w[i]th mo[re] pain and diffic[ult]y t[ha]n the last ti[me] I wr[ote]. The heavy 

rain contin[uin]g w[e]nt d[o]wn at 4 1/2 and ask[e]d my fath[e]r for his phaeton to 

fetch A-[Ann] ho[me], st[aye]d talk[in]g d[o]wnst[ai]rs till off at   at 4.40 and at 

Cliffhill at 5.5. A-[Ann] h[a]d n[o]t been t[he]re, w[e]nt to Crownest. She h[a]d 

been look[in]g ov[e]r old pap[e]rs all the day b[u]t w[a]s just ready to co[me] 

away. Off at 5.10 and ho[me] at 5.35. So[me] whi[le] w[i]th my fath[e]r and 

Mar[ia]n, dress[e]d. A-[Ann]  w[e]nt L  to my a[un]t at 6. Wr[ote] the first 18 lines 

of t[hi]s page. Din[ner] at 6.20, s[e]nt off my let[ter] to ‘Mrs Lawton, Claremont 

house, Leamington Warwickshire’. Coff[ee] w[i]th my fath[e]r and Mar[ia]n 1/2  

h[ou]r till 7.40, t[he]n look[in]g ov[e]r A-s [Ann’s] old pap[e]rs t[ha]t she br[ou]ght 

fr[om] Crownest for ab[ou]t an h[ou]r. More cop[ie]s of wills, Mr Caygill’s gr[ea]t 

gr[a]ndfath[e]r to A- [Ann] and wh[o]se d[au]ght[e]r Ann Caygill marr[ie]d sir 

Ja[me]s Ibbotson [ correct spelling is Ibbetsen] B[arone]t and Mrs Charlesworth’s 

will +   [cum aliis]. Wr[ote] the last 8 lines till 8.50. Till 9.50 r[ea]d fr[om] page 15 

to 55 Philip on the Vit[a]l funct[io]ns 20 min[utes] w[i]th my a[un]t til 10 1/4 at 

w[hi]ch h[ou]r F 50° fine b[u]t dullish morn[in]g, rainy aft[ernoo]n fr[om] ab[ou]t 

2 1/4.

[moistmailman]

Pyrrha: Hey, what are you watching?

Jaune, chuckling: These video online about 50 people trying to cook simple meals.

Pyrrha:........

Jaune: This one right now is about people trying to make a pancake, and there are always idiots who somehow mess up badly. It's hilarious.

Pyrrha, nervously: H-hey, h-how about we watch something else?

Jaune: What? Why? I really want to wat- wait, what the?

*The video suddenly shows Pyrrha*

Pyrrha, awkwardly:........

Jaune:......is this you?

Pyrrha: Uh.......n-no.

*The video subtitles reads "Guest Star Pyrrha Nikos" over Pyrrha*

Jaune, raising an eyebrow: Well the video says otherwise.

Pyrrha, awkwardly coughing: O-okay fine, it's me. B-but this video is pretty boring. C-can we just watch something el-

Jaune: Wait hush. You're on the screen again.

Pyrrha in the video being optimistic: Okay, this should be easy, right? One pancake coming up.

*The Pyrrha in the video pours nearly the whole bowl of pancake mix in without buttering or oiling the pan prior*

Jaune: Oh sweetie.....

Pyrrha, hiding her face in her hands in shame: P-please stop watching.

*The video shows a confused Pyrrha struggling at flipping the large pancake*

Jaune: Oh sweetie, no. What are you doing?

Pyrrha, blushing: P-please don't j-judge me.

[imagine-a-killingharmony]

Drunk V3 Boys!

How about a s/o that has to deal with the v3 boys getting super drunk and then the after math of how is the hangover. ( bonus points if drunk kokichi says the " Finland" spongebob meme) please and ty

Quickly, just imagine them as adults like I am- underage drinking is a big fat “no”, look at me being an... dork. But anyway In the less dork-part let’s say this... I’m literally a giant mess who hasn’t ever been drunk or anything, I don’t really know the effects so we’re going to use those anime-type-of-drunk which is very likely VERY inaccurate or... somewhat-realistic I don’t know. But woah.

Kiibo (Error! Error! Overheating!)

After coming back from his last check-up from Miu you were expecting to be cuddled up close with Kiibo on the couch, watching nextflix- some cheesy Disney movie which you’ve already seen thousands of time before... that’s what you thought....

Till Kiibo walked in adjusted by an trembling Miu who had her arm slung around him, she looked down on the verge of tears muttering about being “so disrespected”, Kiibo sluggishly rolls his head up bursts of steam expanded from every inch of his body.

“... U... Uuuh... there was a function I added inside of em’ to test some booze I was plannin’ on drinking... it was... uh... successful but... J-Just take him- I don’t want to be fuckin’ called out anymore!”

Miu threw Kiibo in your direction running back from once she came, wiping at her eyes as she whined about “how mean” he was... you could only watch Kiibo stir awake, nervousness pricked at your stomach as you realized she made Kiibo try an alcoholic... BEVERAGE!

“... (S/O)?” Kiibo glances up at you, blinking once or twice as he took in his surroundings, you asked if he was okay- he groggily nodded his head. “Never better (S/O)... but... Miu... I-I was just telling her about how stupid it is that she puts herself down almost all the time when she has a brilliant mind, then her very inappropriate attitude- which she presents herself to cover up that wall of self-esteem issues she has... Ah... then there was me getting onto the fact that most people are uncomfortable with the sexual intuendos she has- and for some odd reason before I could say anymore she dragged me here...”

“... I rebooted on the way... once or twice...”

“... what.” Oh. Oh my god... He... What? Kiibo said that?

“... Yes... Hey (S/O) actually I-I have some things to say about you too, look me in the eyes, look at me right now please...” Kiibo cups your face, he looks you right in the eyes, those aren’t the soft loving eyes you know- those are eyes that... are going to fucking destroy you.

Kiibo holds your face tight, escape is impossible, he sluggishly rolls his head as a soft frown falls on his face.

“... You have your errors yourself actually... like... how you...”

...

...

You failed... you are absolutely burnt, just turned into soot by the end of his rant, he’s just sleeping peacefully under the blankets that you had gotten for “cuddle night”, you don’t feel soft at all- you just feel absolutely WRECKED.

Shuichi Saihara (Sad Drunk)

You had both gone out on a party together, specifically a reunion with your classmates which Kokichi was hosting... which already sported red flags but you all didn’t question it, that is until people started to drop like flies... people who drank the punch specifically dropped like flies.

Kaede asked who made the punch... when the relevation that it was Miu and Kokichi themselves it all fell into place like a puzzle, they spiked the goddamn punch.

One of the victims... happened to be Shuichi, a light-weight he hugged your arm tightly slurring and whirling, tears fell down his face as he cried and sobbed about the world.

“... (S-S-S/O!) It’s no fair... I-Iiiii never did anything wrong so why does everything hafta’ be against meeeee...? *hic* it’s unfair.... unfairunfairunfair!”

It’s the fifth time you pat his back, he leans in for a better hold of you so you can give him more affection, he loves that so please do go on, he lets out a slurred hiccup.

“... (S-S/O) a... aaare you seeing anyone...? You always were soooo pretty... and... aaand niiiiice... *hic* and... aaand it make me really happy... I-Iiii wanted to date you since forever ago...”

... How drunk is he to forget the two of you are already dating? “I am.”

Shuichi’s eyes widen, he presses himself up against you with an wail as he starts to cry harder. “Of course yu are- H-Hic- I’m NOT CRYINGF.”

You can’t help but to wonder how he’ll feel in the morning, for now you try to give your poor drunk boyfriend solace as you explain how the two of you are already well- dating.

Luckily, Shuichi falls asleep on your lap while you comfort him, the tears having tired him out... he put his hands around your waist, he bids the world “night night”.

Ryoma Hoshi (Excitable Drunk)

Ryoma wasn’t a heavy drinker, actually he had never drank an drop of the stuff ever, prison doesn’t allow those sort of luxuries, besides he just didn’t want to ruin his reputation by drinking at about fifteen or some shit.

So... he was old enough, the two of you were going on a date here... he’d was just chugging the stuff considering he wanted to see how it tasted, which was rather gross under further consideration... but what he happened to pick up is that he wasn’t feeling all that woozy... guess he ain’t no light-weight.

But he sure ain’t no god, it takes about three whole damn bottles for the effects to start to shine.

...It takes five whole damn bottles for him to actually feel anything, you kept a close eye on your boyfriend as he put the second bottle down with a huff, wiping at his mouth with a “wew”!

“... That was uh, gross taste, heh.” Ryoma pulled his hat up, his cheeks flush slightly pink as he looked around. “Hey. Hey (S/O) you gorgeous son of a bitch look at me.” As soon as you even give him your attention he fingerguns.

... Ryoma wobbly pulls himself up, he doesn’t look like he’ll trip, honestly somehow he still has his balance as he takes your hand.

“... Oh my god I just had an amazing idea. We should adopt,,, a lot of cats,,, not like,,, any cats,,, but... buuuut like an shop full of them,,, and name each of them something silly...” Ryoma’s eyes sparkle deviously. “... Or... like... like... steal everybody’s cats... so we remain the supreme leaders of feline...”

“... Ryoma... do... do you feel tired? Want to take a nap, as amazing ideas as these sound I don’t think your in the right state of mind for... this.” If you let any of this happen, Ryoma’s going to hate himself in the morning.

“I know what I’m doing... I have a license... gimme a sec...” Ryoma pulls out a piece of paper, writes on it, flips it to reveal in sloppy handwriting: “I knwo wat Im do”

You try to survey his features after writing that, all he does is shoot his fingerguns at you.

...Okat you honestly need to take a few pictures of this to show Ryoma later oh my god he’s wobbling towards the door to bring one of those plans he’s mentioned to full-glory, you locked the door for Ryoma, his drunken brain can’t comprehend how to use a step-ladder. You just go to get him some water...

Kaito Momota (... Tired Drunk)

Kaito wouldn’t drink... much, sure, he would totally forge an certificate to like- well, go to space but that was for a good cause! Stuff like drinking was meant to be done for special events and shit otherwise you might get hooked!

And he didn’t actually mean to get drunk on you! He promised he just... kind of mistook the wine in the fridge as the grape panta, he was thirsty- and really fucking tired! Okay? He didn’t expect when he chugged the whole bottle down for the world to... to... hnnnnnn... what’s the word...?

It took a while for you to notice anything was amiss, Kaito had taken himself out of the room to “go get a drink” then he still never came back, so you went to check on your boyfriend to see if he still hadn’t gotten anything, needed some help.

What you didn’t expect to see was Kaito Momota Luminary of the Stars on the floor looking back up at the ceiling mindlessly, with that bottle of wine held tightly in his hands.

“... D... Doo... yu... think it’d be a bd idea if I trie... tried to take a np here? Jst... slep untl a hangover fcks me the hell up, everything hur ts.”

... Oh god! That’s even more errors than usual, so it’s likely on purpose! Kaito’s DRUNK!

You go to get some water for him in the fridge, Kaito’s still looking at the ceiling talking to himself slightly hushed, you don’t know what he’s thinking but he looks like he’s having an ephiphany about the world.

“Holy... Hly sht (S/O) I jst realized how fuckin... weird that Shuichi’s hair stands up like that... he doesn’t use anything to make it like that so how.”

“... Kaito I don’t think your in the right state of mind to make choices like that...” You offer some water to him, his eyes widen.

“Why... Why is everyone’s hair dyed- Like is it actually dyed? Or is it just natural- how can it be natural tho... unless... oh my god (S/O)... we’re in an anime I can’t believe it.”

“Kaito I think you need an second...”

“No. No I know what I’m sayin- oh my god we’re the main characters in some weird anime (S/O)... that’s the only explanation,,, I have to tell... Tsumugi but my legs won’t work nn nn n n..”

... You just pat his head, Kaito grimaces... he was absolutely wasted so everything he said held no inch of truth in it, you just hoped that soon enough your efforts to help him better bare fruit... So he doesn’t make anymore odd claims like him and his friends are in some “weird anime”!

Winks at the fourth wall.

Rantaro Amami (Immune System Of God)

Rantaro... wasn’t a drinker... well besides those really fancy drinks that he usually saw when you both got out, those always looked like a magical experience to try out so he usually did buy those but... he’s never actually gotten legitimately “drunk”, it may be because he never drinks too much.

Then there was the time that had asked Rantaro if he had ever gotten in all words actually “drunk” he responded with a shrug: “I guess I do...? Uh, I’m usually in the right state of mind afterwards still... enough to walk...”

... This was a topic which needed much more exploration... so you went out to a bar together, you swore that anything he got was on you... he squinted but still he bought some colorful drinks in funny-looking cups, peering towards you while he did...

...

He wasn’t actually drunk even after drinking quite a bit, what is this man, how is his immune system keeping him awake? Rantaro chuckles... “Yeah, I think that’s enough for tonight.. come on let’s go home.”

You either failed or this task is just impossible, you take the hand he offers you and walk outside with him... the only noticeable effect are the times he almost bumps into the wall but other than that... nothing...

He knows how to hold his liquor...

Gonta Gokuhara (Clumsy Drunk)

This was Kokichi’s fault, that’s all you know... he offered something for Gonta, that’s what he told you when he gave you back a stumbling crying boyfriend.

“... How did you even get him to drink this- oh my god! Gonta- baby please go lay down on the couch...” You led Gonta to the couch to sit down, he sobbed loudly into the pillow almost falling off, you gave a harsh glare to the Supreme Leader who chuckled at your displeasure.

“I told him it was “Respect Women Juice! TM! Yeah he really just drank it without an inch of hesitance...! Then he fell over drunk, it was hilarious till I had to actually bring him here.”

Gonta let out another loud sob as he fell over off the couch onto the floor, crying about how “Gonta caaaan’t see...!!!”

“You... are one screwed up... mess of a person Kokichi Ouma...” Pushing Gonta back onto the couch you tried to reassure him everything was alright, Kokichi grinned at you putting both of his hands behind the of his head.

“Oh I know... I know really quite well! Good luck dealing with him!”

Kokichi left the two of you alone together, you just let Gonta cry against you about how everything felt so weird... offering some water and some hugs, you’ll get revenge at Kokichi for this... you swear to it.

Kokichi Ouma (Angry Drunk)

... How... Who the hell had enough of your boyfriend to go and make him chug down so much alchohol he got drunk, god knows, but he was now... here... and slurring about some criticisms you didn’t know he had...

“Like... (S/O) it’s so stupid... instead of like... liiiike... getting mad at me when I insult her she usually gets off on it... it’s so gross,,, like how horny can somebody be (S/O)? How HORNY can you be?”

“... Kokichi... do you need a...” Despite how you tried to chime in he always cut you off, with a half-awake grumble...

“No... No let me say this... Hiiiii... iii... so... so what the hell is with Kaito’s sense of logic....? I know, know for a fact he CAN be stupid enough to literally TRUST everybody he meets, like even if there’s hard proof that their an asshole he’s STILL by their side... what the FUCK.”

“Are you talking about Maki?”

“SHE LITERALLY CHOKED ME ONCE YES, Y ES I MEAN MAKI...!” Kokichi touches his neck, rubbing at it. “Honestly... Maki is such a damn... damn jerk... seriously... she’s made “do you want to die” her punchline to almost any jokes she makes, we get it, your edgy as hell!”

While Kokichi grumbled the both of you didn’t notice the door quietly open up... nor did you notice it until their footsteps were in the right range for you to notice them...

Maki trails into the room with an sweating Kaito Momota by her side, she held a card in her hand with the words: “sorry for making you chug beer” in a rather sloppy handwriting...

“... Makiroll, don’t do this...-“ The astronaut tried to stop the caregiver but it was too late, she was already sprinting towards Kokichi to land a finishing blow...!

“FINLAND!”

[To be continued (But not really)]

Korekiyo Shinguuji (Beutifial,,, ohbnn)

How did he actually... get like this, well you honestly swear to god you don’t know, he just appeared at your doorstep muttering about how beautiful humanity was... in so much typos it was almost impossible to decipher a word of what he said...

“... Korekiyo do... you want some water?”

“... hdhdbnnkklllllln.” Korekiyo press his head against the pillow lethargically, he groaned afterwords grasping at his stomach.

“... Is... Is that a yes? A maybe? A... no?”

“... nnnnnnnnnnz.”

“No it is! No it is...”

“Okay! So do you want to um... take a nap?”

“... nbcbxzzz.”

Well. Well you can’t decipher any of this mess, picking yourself up you go to the kitchen to try and take in all that’s happened today...

“... I’ll just get that water anyway...” You pray to whatever god that exists... to please... pleasepleaseplease never have Korekiyo get drunk again.

[strangermask]

Children of the Red Ninja: Chapter 1, the story begins

I have recently learned that there are sensitive topics that I have ignored, so I have added a keep reading to let those who come across this have a choice

Warning: Involves forced marriage, mentions of teen pregnancy and some spoilers of the Ninjago show pilots.

This is an alternate universe, everything written here is to be accepted as apart of the story

Kai was getting ready to marry his girlfriend, Heather. Why was he getting married at thirteen? Her father was forcing him to. She forced Kai to do...the thing that makes babies. She ended up pregnant with twins. Kai didn’t want to get married, he didn’t want to be with this girl anymore. “Why me?” Kai whispered to himself.

He got to the pedestals and waited for the ceremony to begin.

Heather came in her white wedding gown. Her wavy hair was a beautiful blonde. Her eyes were like emeralds that shimmered in the light. Her skin an amazing silky tan. She was a beauty, and a dark personality hid behind all of that. She WAS a wolf in sheep’s clothing.

The two took their vows, and the after-party started. There were only a few good things out of this: Kai didn’t have to live with Heather and her family, he can still live with Nya, and Heather would rarely see him.

Then comes the list of bad things. Kai would still see Heather even if it was rare. He might not even be able to get in contact with his kids, or Heather will just drop them off with him. He knew he was way too young to be a father and get married. He never wanted to do any of this, but Heather had a way to pull his strings.

All that he can do is hope, pray and wait.

Nine months later...

It was the second night of summer. Kai, now fourteen, was trying to make a sword. But it failed miserably. Nya giggled.

“You need to be patient,” Nya said.

“Being patient is hard for me.” Kai sighed as he threw the sword away.

There was a knock on the door, and Kai went to answer. He was shocked to see Heather holding a box. There was crying coming from it.

“H-Heather?” Kai stuttered.

Heather shoved the box in Kai’s arms.

“They're your problem now. Good luck with the brats Kai.” Heather said then walked away.

Kai stood confused. What was Heather talking about? He looked in the box to see two crying babies wrapped in red blankets and a bunch of papers. He pulled one of the papers out to see two birth certificates that almost said the same thing.

Hello! My name is ____________.

I am a boy.

My mommy is Heather Covett.

My daddy is Kai Smith.

My blood type is AB-.

I was born on June 2nd, 20XX at 9:32/9:33 PM.

I am going to live with my daddy at the Four Weapons Blacksmith.

Kai froze. They were his kids. Heather never told him anything about how the pregnancy was going after the wedding. She left him at his house after the honeymoon. The two looked at Kai, starting to calm down.

The first baby had dark brown hair, bright olive skin, and freckles were smeared across his face. The second baby had light brown hair, dark olive skin, and spots on his skin. They both had yellow eyes. Kai’s heart melt.

“Hey there little ones,” Kai said softly, “I’m your daddy, Kai. I’m going to take care of you both from now on.”

Kai brought the box in, and Nya looked at him curiously.

“Who was it?” Nya asked.

“Do you remember Heather?”

“Yeah, what about her?”

“Well... She had twins that belong to me, and she left them with me. So...you’re an aunt now.”

Nya was shocked.

Kai put the box down and picked his sons up.

“Is that them?” Nya asked.

“Yep, they are your nephews.”

Nya came over to see the new family members. They looked at the stranger, feeling scared. Both the twins started to cry again.

“What’s wrong?”

“I-I don’t know!”

Kai started to panic.

“Maybe they’ll stop crying if you sing.”

Kai bit his lip. It was worth a shot.

(Made up lullaby by me)

When the days have gone by,

And the stars shine bright,

Know that I love you.

In the coldest hour,

In the desert tower,

I’ll always protect you.

I will be there,

To find you.

In the nightly scares,

I’ll help you through.

Will you remember

My embrace?

In the cold December

I will put you in a warm place.

Close your eyes

And you will find

Me next to you.

The children fell fast asleep.

“I think it worked.” Nya whispered.

“Yeah, I think so too.” Kai spoke softly.

“What are you gonna name them?”

Kai thought for a moment.

“Aaron Golden Smith and Lucian Silver Smith.”

As time went by, Kai has learned that raising kids on your own was not at all easy. Especially at a young age. Nya tried her best to help. But no matter how difficult it was, Kai’s love for Aaron and Lucian would not stop.

When Aaron said his first word, he pointed at Kai and said “Mama”. Lucian afterward pointed at Kai and called him “Dada”. Kai was in tears and hugged his little angels. Nya found it weird that both her nephews called Kai two different parent names, and he rolled with it.

Aaron’s first steps were very special to Kai too. Aaron surprised Kai when the boy held onto the couch and started to take a few steps. Kai was excited, and he asked Aaron to walk to Mommy (He is officially known as mom or dad). Aaron reached his mom, and he picked his little angel up, spinning him around. Nya just watched as her brother started to act like a kid in a candy store.

Lucian had help walking. Kai would help Lucian walk, but he wasn’t too pressured. When he did walk, Kai was so happy that day.

Kai also learned a few lessons from raising his two boys. He learned that patience was a major key to raising a kid. That patience helped him be a better blacksmith. He became more mature and responsible, and he learned some new skills.

It was also stressful for him. There were a few paperwork for him to do. While he is doing better at smithing, it was hard to maintain work. Also, he had to take care of his family and household. He had a lot to balance on his shoulders.

It’s been two years since Aaron and Lucian were brought into Kai’s life. Heather was still married to him, and she got pregnant again with a baby boy. How much Kai hoped she would finally get into parenthood after the baby was born.

It was in the middle of autumn. Kai was smithing a sword, and he was successful in the end.

“Looks like raising kids made you a better blacksmith.” Nya grinned.

“Oh haha.” Kai rolled his eyes. He put the sword up, and someone tugged on Kai’s leg.

“Daddy, thewe a person.” Aaron said.

Kai looked to saw an old man with a long beard wearing white robes and a straw hat.

“Hmm... All of your metal is slow and heavy. Useless in the art of stealth.” The man looked around, “All tools for a samurai, but none for a ninja?”

Kai was confused.

“Ninja? Sorry sir, but you’re won’t be able to find a ninja here.” Kai said.

“Wats ‘ninja’?” Lucian asked.

“A ninja is kind of like a samurai. But instead of heavy armor and weapons, they’re more sneaky and silent and know more fighting styles.”

The man looked at Aaron and Lucian.

“Children?” The man tilts his head.

“Yes. They are my sons.”

The man looked around again.

“Is there something specific you’re looking for?” Kai asked.

“Hmm... I thought I would find something special here.” The man said.

“If you’re looking for something special, I can show you-”

“Daddy, the man diswappear.” Aaron said.

Kai looked where the old man was standing, only to see no one there.

“That’s strange...”

“Daddy, can we pway?”

Kai nodded and took his sons outside. They started to play for a few minutes until dark clouds appeared. Skeletons started to come to the village. Three of them were talking, but Kai couldn’t understand. He did know that danger was coming.

“Aaron, Lucian, get inside.” Kai said.

“Daddy, who awe they?” Lucian started to feel scared.

“I don’t know, but it’s not safe for you right now. Please go inside petals.”

Aaron and Lucian nodded and went inside as Nya came out.

“What’s going on?” Nya asked. “We got company,” Kai said as he put armor on. One of the skeletons yelled attack and villagers were running. “Stay here and take care of the boys.” 

Kai ordered. Kai started to fight the skeleton warriors. One of them bit his foot, and he kicked it to two more. He saw Nya sneaked attack two skeletons.

“I thought I said to stay inside!” “And let you have all the fun?” Nya ask. 

“You left Aaron and Lucian alone! What if someone kidnaps or hurts them!?” “Oh...right.” 

Meanwhile, Aaron and Lucian were hiding while two skeletons were arguing. One of them knocked down something and saw a piece of paper. 

“The map!” They both shouted. 

Lucian was scared and Aaron was confused. Why were skeletons after a piece of paper? The two sneaked past the skeletons to their mom. 

“Daddy!” Aaron shouted. “Aaron! Lucian! What are you-” “Skewetons awe twaking paper!” 

Kai noticed the two skeletons running out of the shop. Before Kai did anything, he was knocked back. 

“DADDY!” Lucian cried as he and Aaron ran to Kai. Kai looked up to see a four-armed skeleton holding four weapons.

“You’re a ‘daddy’?” The skeleton laughed, “I’ll make sure you and the children die.”

Kai pulled Aaron and Lucian in and shield them as the skeleton raised a sword. He was knocked back by a mini golden tornado that shouted: “Ninja go!”. Kai, Aaron, and Lucian looked at the tornado, and it disappeared. In its placement was the old man from earlier. 

“Sensei Wu,” The skeleton growled, “Your spinjitzu looks rusty.”

“Nothing like bone to sharpen its edge, Samukai.” The man responded.

The skeleton looked at the boys. Above them was a water tower. He destroyed one of the supporting legs, and the tower started to timber at the boys. The man saved the three from the tower by turning into a tornado again. The skeleton retreated back to a skull truck. He looked at the man.

“Lord Garmadon says take the girl!” He shouted. 

The man gasped. 

“Lord Garmadon?”

One of the skeletons crackles as he launches a claw at Nya. It grabbed her and took her away.

“NYA!” Kai yelled.

He watched as the army took his sister away. Aaron and Lucian started to cry as he hugged Kai.

“They took her away...” Kai said sadden.

He felt something bonk his head.

“I told you, useless.” The man said.

“WHY DOES THAT MATTER!? THEY TOOK MY SISTER! Why couldn’t you have saved her with-with your-”

“Spinjitzu.”

“Yes, that!”

Kai got up.

“I’m going after her.” Kai said.

“Where they go, a mortal cannot,” The man spoke, “That was Samukai, King of the Underworld. And if it’s true that he’s carrying orders for Lord Garmadon, then I fear things are worse than I ever thought.”

“What are you talking about? Who is Garmadon? Why did they steal some paper? And why did they take my sister?”

“That paper is more important than you think.” The man told Kai the story of the Ninjago and the First Spinjitzu Master. Along with why the paper was important.

“You’re the younger brother? So you came here to look for the map?”

“I came here for something greater. You.”

Kai tilts his head.

“Me?”

“My brother cannot enter the realm. It’s obvious he struck a deal with Samukai. If he collects all four weapons, even I won’t be able to stop him again. But you, you have the fire inside. I will train you to harness it. Use it. To become a Spinjitzu Master.”

Kai looked at his sons.

“I am flattered,” Kai looked at the man, “But I’m just a blacksmith. I’m not special, and I don’t do well with other people’s rivalry. I have to save my sister.”

“If you want to save your sister, you have to control the fire in you.”

Kai thought about it. The man said he can help Kai, but what fire was in him? What about Aaron and Lucian? Kai wasn’t going to leave his sons here and risk them getting kidnapped too.

Kai came to a decision.

“I’ll go, but on one condition.”

“What might that be?”

“You let my sons come too. I’m not going to abandon them here.”

“...Alright, they can come.”

The next day...

Aaron was sitting on Kai’s shoulders and Lucian was being carried by Kai as he followed Wu up the mountain. Kai was extremely tired. They reached a monastery, and Wu opened the door. There was an empty stone field in front of them.

“So...What are we doing at a monastery?” Kai panted.

“This is where you will train.” Wu answered.

He clicked on a dragon statue, and a button appeared. He pushed the button. Training equipment started to appear in front of them.

“Woah!” Aaron said. Kai let Aaron and Lucian down. Aaron ran to a training pole and climbed on it.

“Aaron, be careful.” Kai said.

The training pole started to descend.

“Oh dear.” Wu said worriedly.

Kai ran and removed Aaron from the pole. Kai got shot up in the air the moment Aaron got onto the ground. Kai was sent flying, knocking into a dragon symbol. He fell to the ground clutching his stomach.

“That took a lot of air out of me.” Kai groaned.

The twins ran to Kai.

“I sowwy Mommy!” Aaron said as he began to cry.

“It’s okay cinnamon.”

“Now that you know that, we can begin,” Wu said. “Complete the training course before I finished my tea. Then we will see if you’re ready.”

Wu walked to a teapot, poured some tea, and drank it. “Today you failed. Tomorrow you will try again.” Wu said.

“Bwut tat not-” 

“Patience young one.” Wu interrupted Aaron.

Wu closed the doors, leaving Kai, Aaron, and Lucian outside.

For the next few days, Kai trained and trained. But Wu's expectations were never fulfilled. Aaron and Lucian cheers on their mom. Kai, meanwhile, doesn’t know how he’s going to do this.

Finally, one day, Kai is determined to pass. He knocks the tea out of Wu’s hand as he was about to drink it. When he looked around, he couldn’t find Kai.

“Was that one sugar? Or two?” Someone said.

Wu looked up to see Kai holding a cup of tea. Wu smiled. Kai was ready.

“So, am I going to learn Spinjitzu now?” Kai asked.

“You already have,” Wu stood up, “Your final test comes tomorrow. My advice to get some sleep.”

(I said I already have a fic for single dad Kai by @ninjaheadcanons so here it is. I’m probably going to do an alternate version where Kai is already a ninja, but for now, we’re starting back in the pilots)

(Hope you guys enjoy)