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nightowlfandom · 3 years ago

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Possesive! Jeon Jungkook- Only Mine....

HEY GUYS!

SO ANON ASKS

Your new promp list had me 🥵🥵🥵 if it’s ok can I request numbers 1, 3, 34, 79 with jealous best friend JJK snapping after seeing you around boys all the time? You can choose if you want it noncon or dubcon 🥵

OMG I GLAD YOU LIKE IT! OKAY LETS GET RIGHT TO IT! (Also since I don’t do non-con, I’ll make it consensual. Just a heads up)

1- Look at me when I fuck you!

3- I said FUCKING BEG!

34- I feel like the angrier you get at me, the harder I fuck you.

79- Stay the night with me…I don’t care if it will ruin our friendship.

CHECK OUT MY MASTERLIST HERE!

LEGGO!

...

“Kookie!” You ran up to your bestie as he walked out of the airport terminal.

“Y/N!” he practically dropped his duffel bag as he wrapped his arms around your wait. He hoisted you off the ground. He buried his head in the crook of your neck. “My Y/N, I missed you.”

“I missed you more.” you laughed as he tightened his arms around you.

“And I get you all to myself- he began.

“Y/N!” you heard an onslaught of voices. Taehyung, Hoseok, Seokjin and the other guys all crowded around you. You were pulled out of Jungkook’s hug into Namjoon.

“Guys!” you smiled. “I missed you all too!”

“Damn, you should’ve seen Jungkook! He bolted out of the plane!” Hoseok laughed.

“Maybe because I wanted to see my Y/N.” he grumbled in reply. “Give her back!”

“No way!” Yoongi scoffed. “You can have her back after we get dinner.”

Jungkook glared as his friends. How dare they just take you from him?!

“You guys!” you laughed. “We’re making a scene!” you said as their fans caught sights of you. They all seemed infuriated. “You’re fans are gonna-”

“Our fans aren’t gonna do shit.” Jungkook glared into the crowd. “Let them try.” he seethed. He snatched you back into his embrace. “I’ll protect you, love.”

You nodded shyly as Kookie led you to the front of the airport.

...

“Okay weirdos! Dinner is served!” you held the giant box of takeout. “Noodles for Yoongi, Taehyung! Rice Cakes for Seokjin, Namjoon and Hobi. For Jimin, some Extra Spicy Tofu Stew. and For Jungkook and I, fried rice!” you put the box on the coffee table.

Jungkook smirked, of course he went out of his way to make sure no one ordered the same thing as you. He made sure you had ordered last so he could order the same thing.

“Shit, they gave me way too much Bulgogi.” Namjoon seethed. “Y/N, wanna split with me? I don’t think I’ll be able to eat all of this.” Namjoon looked at you who had already settled.

“Oh. Sure!” you smiled.

Namjoon shot Jungkook a mean spirited smile. “In your face, asshole.” he said with his eyes, even though the words never escaped his lips

DAMNIT! Jungkook felt his fist clench. He rolled his eyes. “Hey! Y/N! Pass me a napkin will ya?”

“Oh. yeah.” you threw a napkin his way before resuming your conversation with Yoongi.

Jungkook watched as Yoongi traced his fingers on your wrists as he spoke to you. His face hardened into a glare. Everyone knew he liked you, but until he made his move they wouldn’t care.

...

To say he was pissed was an understatement. He was practically steaming at the ears.

“Why were you with Hoseok?” he asks as he stormed through his room door, a hand tightly wrapped around your wrist. Surprising but not painful.

“He needed help shopping for an outfit for a photoshoot?” you raised a brow. “Why?”

“Don’t bullshit me! You were on a date!”

“Okay first of all even if I was, what business of yours is that?” you crossed your arms. “You’ve been acting pretty weird these past few days and I don’t like it!”

“I DON’T LIKE YOU PARADING YOURSELF AROUND LIKE A-”

“I dare you to fucking finish that sentence.” you warned. “You can forget you had a friend if you do.” You backed towards the door.

Jungkook grew more and more agitated. “Y/N I’m sorry.” he ran a hand through his hair. “I didn’t mean to say that.”

“Why are you acting so weird?” you sighed. “Do you not like me anymore?”

“No!!” he looked at you as if you had lost your mind. “Y/N I LOVE YOU!” he blurted out. “I’ve loved you for five fucking years ever since we met!!” he spilled his heart out. “and y-you’re putting me in an uncomfortable position!”

“Huh?” you could barely register what he said before he stormed up and captured your mouth is a kiss.

‘Kookie!” you were surprised to say the least. “You just- Hmm.” he didn’t give you time to talk as he kissed you again, wrapping his arms tightly around you. He ran his fingers down your spine, holding you close.

You would have been over cloud nine...if you weren’t so angry.

“WAIT A MINUTE.” you forced yourself to step back from him. “FIVE YEARS?” you exploded. “FIVE FUCKING YEARS AND YOU DIDN’T TELL ME! YOU LET ME BELIEVE YOU ONLY SAW ME AS A FRIEND FOR FIVE MISERY FILLED-...”you began pacing back and forth as you lashed out on your friend.

Jungkook just watched as you drug him for filth, calling him every name in the book.

“YOU ASSHOLE! I’VE BEEN TRYING TO HIDE MY FEELINGS AND YOU JUST COME OUT THE WATER AND TELL ME THAT- OH YOU PEICE OF-” Jungkook finally had enough and cornered you against the nearest wall.

“...I feel like... I feel like the angrier you get at me, the harder I fuck you. “ he mused aloud. “You’re in love with me? And you didn’t tell me?” he raised an eyebrow. “Isn’t that somethin-”

"I am still mad at you.” you sneered. “After tonight you are dead to me.”

“Am I ?” he cooed. “So you don’t want me to...” he began fumbling with your jeans, unfastening the button with one hand.

“What are you doing?” your eyes widened. You were now more shocked that angry. “Don’t you dare-...” you felt the pads of his fingers along the line of your clothed slit.

“What? Was that a moan I just heard?” he smirked. “Come on Y/N I know you can be louder than that. Maybe if you beg enough, I’ll make you cum.” he creeped into the waistband of your panties. “Come on...beg me honey.”

“I refuse.” you looked away. “Y-you can go fu-fuuuhh-” you felt the pads of his fingers.

“I said fucking beg.” he sneered, pressing his body up against yours. “Stop being so damn stubborn. Let me hear those sounds you think nobody hears when you finger yourself in the bathrooms at midnight.”

“How did you-”

“You stink at being quiet.” he bit his lip. “Come on.” he spoke in a babyish voice, rubbing your clit. “This is how you do it to yourself, right?”

“J-jungkook.” you whimpered. “W-what are you-”you cut yourself off as you felt his fingers slip into your wetness. A loud moan erupted from your lungs.

“Yeah, that’s it. That’s fucking it.” he growled. “Moan like that some more.” he slowly thrust his fingers in and out of you. “Are you thinking about me when you thrust those pretty fingers into that-”

“Don’t say it! That’s a dirty word!” you warned, while ironically mewling like a little kitty cat.

“Don’t say what? That pussy? That cunt? That soaking wet womanhood you got down there. The same pussy that’s asking me to shove my dick in there?” he smirked as he spoke.

“You d-dick!” you leaned forward, your head falling on his shoulder. “S-such as asshole.”

“ Look at me when I fuck you with my fingers.” he demanded. “Or I’ll stop completely.”

You shyly lifted you head. Jungkook thought you were so adorable and truth be told he wouldn’t have stopped. To know that you obeyed anyways was so relieving.

“Shit, I needa taste you real quick.” he moved his fingers from you and yanked down your jeans. “Kick those off for me.”

You instantly obeyed, throwing your jeans and panties off to the side. He lowered himself to his knees. “Shit, look at that.” he wasted no time in driving his tongue into you.

“Hey Jungkook!” there was a knock on the door. Jungkook had pushed you against the door, stopping anyone from opening it. You heard Jimin’s voice.

You glared down at Jungkook with warning. You knew what was gonna happen, but you were scared anyways.

“Hmmm!” he moaned loudly, driving his tongue deeper into your slit. He sucked at your clit, causing a loud cry to escape you.

“Umm is Y/N in there with you?” he called. “IS SHE HURT?!”

You tried to talk, but Jungkook had hooked your leg over his shoulder. “Come on, answer him.”

“I-I’m okay!” you found it in yourself to talk. “I’m just...a little busy!” you clenched your fist to focus on something, anything else. “Doing things!”

“Like what?”

“LIKE BEING FUCKED BY ME!” Jungkook yelled back as he rose to his feet, pants dropping around his ankles. He hoisted you up, wrapping your legs around his waist. You felt his cock slip into your heat. “COME BACK LATER!”

He didn’t wait for an answer as he carried you to the bed, setting you down along with himself. He slowly thrust himself into your wetness. “Damnit Y/N.” he seethed, sucking in a harsh intake of air. “Shit.” his jaw went slack.

“F-fuck.” you whimpered. “Kookie.” you whimpered.

“Y/N.” you could see the tears of pleasure forming in his eyes. “You feel so- So fucking good. Look at me, p-please?”

You didn’t tear your eyes away from him. You found it hard to. “Jungkook! I- Uh..” you were now a load, crumbling mess.

“I want to kiss you, come here.” he grabbed either side of your face and gave you a slopped kiss, shoving his tongue into your mouth instantly. “Y/N, I’m gonna cum. But I don’t want to until you cum first. So I’m gonna go faster okay?” His eyes bore into yours, noses touching.

You shyly nodded, feeling his thrusts increase. You were hella sensitive, and in love with it. “Jungkook.” you moaned. “It feels-”

“I know.” he kissed you again. “Fuck, cum for me...cum for me please~” he mewled through thrusts.

He didn’t have to tell you twice. A string of curses he had never heard before along with his name spilled from your lips. Jungkook was next to cum, yanking himself from you. He spilled his cum practically all over the place. He collapsed next to you, leaving you both to stare at the ceiling.

“...I should go.”

“ No...Stay the night with me…I don’t care if it will ruin our friendship.“ he breathed out. “Y/N...I-..I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”

“You should be.” your breath hitched. “Probably would have gotten this out of the way a lot sooner.”

Your grumpy words made him laugh a little. He lazily threw an arm around you and pulled you towards him. “I love you, for real.”

“Promise?”

“Of course. You’re mine. Only mine...”

...

I STILL GOT IT BITCHESSSS

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luimagines · 3 years ago

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Date Day! Part 3

Masterlist

Part 1 Part 2

Part 3 will included Warrior Twilight and Sky!

Content under the cut!

Warrior

“Darling.” Warrior slid up to your side and very smoothly put his hand on the table just beside yours. It was a very well put and control movement that did not in any way nearly throw him onto the ground in the process.

Hiding your giggles to the best of your ability, you hum your acknowledgement with a cute tilt to your head as you do so. “Hello~”

“What are you doing?”

“I’m not telling you.” You grin and continue with your little project.

Warrior pouts a little before leaning close to your ear, his breath sending electricity down your arm and back all the way through your fingertips. “If I ask you nicely, will you tell me?”

“Nope.” You turn to look at him, popping the ‘p’ and kiss him on the nose. “You’ll just have to wait like a good boy and find out later.”

Warrior groans and flops into your side, nearly sending you off of your feet but you fix yourself before that can happen.

“Link, you’re so dramatic.”

“Love me~~~~” He whines. “Pay attention to me, my love, my life, my heart and soul, my everything, my world wide adoration-”

“Oh my goodness.” You snort and hurriedly put everything away. “Let’s go somewhere then you big baby.”

“You love me.” He grins and sweeps you off of your feet and out the door.

He starts running.

You scream and laugh at the absurdity of it all. You pass many of your friends and the group itself as he takes you somewhere without you being able to really see where Warrior’s going.

You gasp and hold on tight to his shoulders, gently running your fingers through his hair as you travel.

Eventually he slows down and he takes a minute to put you down.

You laugh a bit more at the theatrics and move to take his hand instead. “I take it there was something you wanted to show me.”

“I didn’t know you have this here.” He says excitedly and doesn’t bother waiting to explain more as he pulls you with him. “This is something my Hyrule is known for and this is just beside the village?”

You blinked and look at an old statue.

It’s always been there for as long as you can remember and yet there wasn’t any special you knew about it.

“It’s old.” You shrug. “I never thought it was anything important.”

Warrior jumps a little on his toes and runs forward. He takes a minute to look around it and brushes some parts until their clean. He continues doing this for a good five minutes before he seems to find what he’s looking for.

With a cry of victory he reaches forward and presses something.

The statue’s eyes begin to glow and there’s the sound of stone grinding on stone before a pathway opens up and reveals an underground staircase.

You gape at it and look at Warrior who looks like a kid in a candy store.

Warrior jumps down onto the first steps and turns, holding his hand out to you. “Let’s explore it. Come on.”

You nod dumbly and grab his hand again.

You’re always learning something new about your home, aren’t you?

Twilight

“Hey you.” You call out teasingly as Twilight passes your front door.

Twilight freezes and slowly turns around like a deer caught in torch light. It appears he must have been trying to be sneaky or at least avoid being caught by you.

You raise an eyebrow and cross your arm. “Going somewhere lover boy?”

Twilight lets out a small noise of nervousness before he straightens up and scratches the back of his head. “So uhh... How much of that did you see?”

“See what?”

“Oh!” Twilight smiles. “Good, good, never mind then.”

“See what? Trying to hide something?” You say and walk toward him. “In my own house?”

Twilight grins and steps forward to wrap his arms around you. “Perhaps. It was Wild’s idea.”

“Should I be worried about any potential flames?” You say... somewhat jokingly.

Twilight chuckles and shakes his head. “Nothing like that. Promise.”

“If he burns down my house, you owe me a new one.” You poke his chest in a very serious manner.

“If you lose your house you can have mine.”

“And you?”

“Oh, I’ll be there too of course.” Twilight laughs into your hair and he holds you close. “Move in with me. I’ll take care of you.”

“Very tempting.” You snort and hug him tighter. “I wanted to know if you wanted to go to the fairy fountain nearby. Get some more fairies for the trip, maybe bless an item or two... Spend time with me.”

The idea lights up Twilight’s face and you think this is what he wanted from you. something tells you this would go perfectly with that little plan Wild has... and you don’t know how to feel about that. So you ignore the feeling and pretend that nothing bad is going to happen by your negligence.

Twilight lets you go and instantly takes your hand in his. “Show me where it is.”

“This way.” You lace your fingers together and grin, leading him away from your house. “You’ll like her. Her name is Kyhic.”

Sky

“Sky! Sky! Sky!” You ran through your house and latched onto your boyfriend’s arm to second you saw him.

The force with which you collided into him with nearly through him off of his feet but he gladly let you hang off of him before you decided to drag him away.

It’s not like he was in the middle of a conversation or anything.

“I want to show you something.” You said with one of the brightest smiles Sky has seen on to date.

You bring him to the back of the house and into your room, from your room to take him to a door just beside your closet- not giving him any time to look around and snoop before you open it and pull him inside.

“You showed me your workspace.” You say with a small flourish as you gesture into the room before you. “And this is mine!”

There’s a small table in the back covered in bits of paste and tools alike, in the middle is another round table with a pedal at the bottom and what looks like a cracked would have been pot.

Looks like you didn’t put it away before you left for your adventure.

Along the walls are multiple other tools with different ends and different blades in order to help get your desired shape and design.

Sky steps in with a small gasp and sees where you store the clay and molding pot- there’s even a few gloves to the side and small furnace that sits at the back of it all.

“I want to make you something.” You say and begin to take out certain bits and bobs that Sky can’t recognize for the life of him. “Anything, name it. I might even agree to make you my best version of a loftwing- but I can’t promise it’ll be good.”

“Teach me.” He says instead.

“What?” You blinked and turn to see him.

He has a soft smile on his face and he both looks impressed and charmed by your enthusiasm for the craft. “Teach me how to do this. Show me how this works. Teach me to do what you do.”

You flush and place the clump of clay you’ve gather on the spinning table, bringing over the bucket of water you always have on standby.

“Umm... Well...”

“Please?”

You look up at him once more and know that you’ve lost. “OK, sit here and I’ll show you how to get the table spinning.”

#linked universe #linkeduniverse #linked universe x reader

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tooruluv · 4 years ago

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Tooru Oikawa x F!Reader ( part 9 )

❝ my love for him is much like winter, a skeleton for the world to see. too bad he never liked the cold. ❞

description: being the neighbor and lifelong best friend of tooru oikawa definitely had it’s perks. you were never an outcast, always had a seat at lunch, got into volleyball games for free. the problem was, however, that being in love with him outweighed those perks. you would never tell him that, though, even if it hurt like hell.

genre: best friends to lovers, angst, unrequited love, fluff if you squint hard enough

word count: 1,442

warnings/notes: i was able to be online for a bit so i wanted to release this (rather short) filler chapter for you guys! <3

tag list: @afuckingunicornn @maii-flowers @clandestinerays @brownandchill @readeretal @wedojustbevibin @shigarakiskitten @shittykawaa @saeranoppa @srirachibi @tpwkatsumu @sempiternal-amour @bokutos-h0e @pinknugget @intheawks @tori218 @seikamuzu @alexthe80swhore

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You skipped school for a week. It was a full week of heartache; most of which included the following: watching new shows (and finishing them), being brought food by your very understanding mother, crying, taking very long baths, wallowing in self-pity (which is something you tried not to do, but ended up doing anyway), crying until you were dehydrated, and ignoring texts and calls.

A new week was starting when your mom walked into your room, interrupting your daily “stare at the ceiling in sadness”. She sat on the end of your bed by your feet when she said, “It’s time for you to return to life.”

“What if I don’t want to?”

“Sweetheart, I get it.” She placed a hand on your ankle, trying to pull your attention to her. You kept your eyes on the ceiling. “Trust me, I do. But you can’t continue to isolate yourself from life. You have a beautiful, bright future in front of you. Exams are coming up, and your friends miss you.”

You sighed. “I guess I’ll go.”

“Good! Quite frankly, I’m tired of lying to your friends. Did you know that Iwaizumi resorted to texting me every day?” Your mom stood up, sending you a smile when you followed suit. “Clean your room. I’ll drive you to school tomorrow.”

You agreed, staring at the empty water bottles next to your bed.

Out of the hundreds of texts and missed calls, you decided to text Iwaizumi back first. He was the one who you’ve known the longest (other than the other boy you shall not name) and had helped you through your Love Problems.

you: hey. i’m ok. pls tell me that you’ll be at school tomorrow

iwa <3: fuck dude

iwa <3: you scared the shit out of me i deadass texted your fucking mom

iwa <3: i will be at school tomorrow the question is will you

you: yeah i’m coming. didn’t wanna be alone

iwa <3: you’ll never be alone darling

Despite everything telling you not to, you got up that Monday morning for school. You cleaned your room, you showered, you got a good night’s rest. You even ate breakfast. Yet, you still felt like… well, shit.

Your mother drove you to school, sending you a small smile and wave of encouragement like it was your first day of kindergarten and you were scared to go in. Truth was, you wanted to throw up all over the front doors and go straight back into your bedroom and watch another Gordon Ramsay compilation on youtube.

You sighed and went into Hell (hell being school). You tried to act as normal as possible but it was evident that everyone in the entire school hadn’t moved on from the whole thing, eyes staring at you and inaudible whispers.

“Great.” You mumbled to yourself, whipping your locker open.

It was at that moment that Tooru Oikawa made his appearance. He was walking next to Hanamaki, talking among themselves, when Oikawa stopped dead in his tracks. Hanamaki gave him a small pat on his back before leaving (and effectively leaving the awkward situation that would inevitably happen).

He opened his locker beside you.

“Hi!” He greeted, as though it was the most normal and casual thing ever. “You’re feeling better? Your mom said that…”

You didn’t acknowledge him, closing your locker and walking to class. Maybe you’ll find Iwaizumi before class…

“Whoa. Wait!” Oikawa was walking beside you then, easily catching up to you. “Did you get any of my texts?”

You spun on your heels, finally facing him after a week of being MIA and trying to forget your love for him. He swallowed and stared back at you.

“I don’t know what you want me to do.” You shrugged. “I told you that I needed time. And by that, I mean I need time away from you specifically. I’m not going to entertain the idea of pretending that nothing happened between us because it did.”

Oikawa blinked, nodding. “Okay, okay. Yes.” He purposefully took a step back, literally giving you space. “But can I ask one thing? Just one?”

“Go ahead.”

“For how long?” He asked. “How long do you think it’ll take for you to talk to me again?”

“I don’t know. Maybe when the school stops staring at me like a wounded puppy.”

“I’ve missed you!” Sana brought you into a hug, her boobs straight into your face. “I seriously thought that you dropped off of the face of the earth.”

You let a small smile creep onto your lips. The first smile in a while. “Sorry.”

“Don’t you dare apologize. What even happened?”

“That’s a story for later.”

She linked her arm with yours before walking with you to the library. Iwaizumi and Matsukawa sat at the usual table, heads in books like their life depended on it. It wasn’t until you were nearly next to them that they realized you were there. You hadn’t been able to see Iwaizumi all day.

“Oh my god, she’s really here.” Matsukawa exclaimed, a bit too loud for a library.

Iwaizumi got up from his seat (also very loudly, a squeak from the chair on the floor). He immediately pulled you into a hug, picking you up and putting his head into your shoulder.

“Shittykawa told me what happened.” He mumbled into your neck. You bit the inside of your lip and wrapped your arms around his waist. “I’m not going to ask if you’re okay, but I do want you to know that I know.”

“You always know.” You mumbled back.

Hajime Iwaizumi was walking with Issei Matsukawa when he caught Oikawa leaving your house. He knew immediately that something had happened, that something wasn’t quite right, because Oikawa had his head down. He never had his head down.

Iwaizumi turned to his boyfriend, telling him “I’ll be right back.” Matsukawa gave him a kiss on the wrist before letting him run off.

“Hey man,” Iwaizumi jogged to his best friend. Oikawa stopped, head still at his feet. “Hey. What’s up?”

“Nothing.”

“Oikawa.” Iwaizumi stood in front of him, cutting him off. “Don’t bullshit me. What’s going on? What happened?”

When Oikawa didn’t answer, Iwaizumi put his arms on his shoulders to bring his head up. Oikawa was red-faced, tears running down his cheeks. He was in pain.

“I, um.” Oikawa looked back and forth, never really meeting Iwaizumi’s eyes. “I told her that I’m in love with her. We kissed and I told her that I love her.”

“Oh?” That’s a good thing… right?

“She shut the door in my face. She said that she “thought that she was in love with me too”. And just shut the door.”

“Oh.”

“What if we got married?” Oikawa once asked you, a giggling child in the morning sun.

You both laid in your backyard, the grass long and bugs flew along your heads. You didn’t care. You giggled back to him.

“That’s gross! You have cooties!”

“Not if we’re married I don’t!” Oikawa stuck his tongue out at you.

“We’re too young to get married! We have to at least be old… like 20 years old!”

“Ew!”

You laid like that, giggling and laughing as kids, until your mom called you in for lunch. Oikawa ran to the door (“last one there is a rotten egg!”).

tetsurou kuroo :P: i heard that you’ve finally left the darkness and stepped back into regular life

tetsurou kuroo :P: hajime texted me sorry if that sounded like i’m stalking you.

tetsurou kuroo :P: unless you’re into that... then i’m totally stalking you...

tetsurou kuroo :P: PLS IM KIDDING anyway can i come over today. i have another hoodie for you.

you: you’re cute. i miss you too.

You walked home alone that night. After a while of isolation, human interaction actually seemed like a chore. You just wanted to be alone, even if it was just for a few minutes as you walk.

You heard walking behind you.

“You can walk next to me.” You said, knowing exactly who it was. “I know you don’t have practice on Mondays.”

Tooru Oikawa appeared next to you in only a few seconds, jumping at the offer. The roles were reversed now.

“I don’t want to overstep boundaries.” He said.

“I know.”

“I’m sorry, again. For kissing you.”

“I know.”

He stared at you instead of the sidewalk ahead. You kept your eyes on the sky.

“I’m sorry for telling you that I love you, too.”

“Don’t be sorry about that.” You stepped onto your porch where Kuroo stood, waiting for you. “That was the one thing you did right.”

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witchygagirlwrites · 4 years ago

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Best Friend (Part 2/3)

you and Kevin are best friends but when you start to fall for him you start pulling away until a life threatening situation urges you to confess how you feel

An alarm ripped through the firehouse before you heard Casey's voice "STRUCTURAL FIRE AT AN APARTMENT BUILDING. MULTIPLE INJURIES. LETS MOVE PEOPLE"

You grabbed your jacket and ran behind Brett to your rig and just slammed the door shut as she pulled out onto the road.

-----

At the same time you were responding to the call the intelligence was getting a notification saying it fit the m.o. of the arsonist they'd been after for the last two weeks.

"Now remember this isn't officially our scene until they have it cleared but let's roll out alot of these sickos like sticking around to watch their handy work we may hit it lucky and catch this asshole" Hank barked out as everyone grabbed their jackets and headed for the stairs.

-----

You were working through the triage area another Gabby had set up upon arriving to the scene.

So far the worse injury you'd seen was a broken femur. There was lots of cuts and luckily low degree burns but so far it was looking as if everyone had gotten out unscathed until a man around your age approached you.

He was wearing a ups uniform so it was clear he'd probably heard the news and headed straight here. You figured it would be a simple case of finding out the name of his loved ones and pointing him towards which tent.

-----

"Sir can I help you?" You asked and he nodded "My wife Jessica she's uh she's eight months pregnant. She was on bed rest where is she? We live in two fifteen"

You felt your heart skip a beat at his words. You had walked every inch of the traige area and hadn't seen a pregnant woman. "Sir can you just have a seat right here" you spoke keeping your voice calm from years of training it.

Her eyes widened as she shook her head "I'll go talk to him. You go tell Casey we've got someone still inside"

-----

You grabbed one of the bags out her rig that held a scba mask and fire blanket and threw it over your shoulder as you ran to where you'd last seen Matt.

You spotted Kelly first and hollered "SEVERIDE!" He turned towards you so you told him "There's a woman eight months along inside. Apartment two fifteen" he nodded and headed back in calling across his radio.

You started back towards triage but heard a clanking noise like someone hitting on pipes and it occured to you these buildings had multiple emergency exits. She could be trapped and by the time you got one of the guys out to her it could be too late from smoke inhalation alone.

You pulled your radio from your side and tuned it to the channel they used to communicate inside "Um fellas I think i may have heard something near the north west corner"

A few moments passed and you heard the clanking again and no one had responded. Your only thought was a pregnant woman dying because you didn't do anything so without thinking of your own safety you headed in the direction of the noise carefully stepping over boards that had fallen from the fire burning two stories up.

"CALL OUT!" you hollered and heard a weak "I'm here!" and followed it. You pulled the scba mask out and put it over your face because the smoke was already to the point of making tears spring to your eyes.

-----

Meanwhile the scene two blocks from the fire was one of madness. Antonio had spotted the guy as soon as he parked his car and alerted the rest of the unit who eventually caught him after a foot chase.

Antonio, Hank and Al headed back to the station while everyone else continued to the fire to see if they could possibly help.

Time Kevin stepped out the car he spotted Brett and immediately looked for you as he walked towards her. When she looked up he smiled and pointed around "Where's my girl?"

Brett looked around then hollered at Gabby asking where you had ended up.

Gabby shrugged that she didn't know then spotted Casey walking out the building and asked him if he talked to you or if they'd found the pregnant woman. When the answer to both was a no the entire scene went into a panic.

-----

You carefully picked your way towards the sound of the plea for help and spotted legs pinned under a beam. You followed them and said a silent prayer at discovering her stomach was untouched.

You leaned down so she could see you and smiled "Jessica? Your husband is worried about you" she started crying at seeing she wasn't alone then started coughing. You immediately ripped the mask off yourself and helped her put it on then spread the fire blanket over her. "I'm gonna try to move these beams just stay still ok?" She nodded so you moved down to her legs where they were pinned.

You pulled the radio from your side and tried the line again "Fellas I'm in the north west corner near the rear emergency exit I've got a trapped female late twenties in her eight month. I need some help"

When no response came you groaned and slid it back on your side before deciding to try the beams.

You squatted down to get a good grip ignoring the burning starting in your lungs and how the heat was licking up your shoulders telling you the fire was getting close to where the two of you were.

You tried with everything you had but it only moved a couple inches no where near far enough to get her free.

You eased it back down and moved up to her side to access any other wounds. You asked questions around coughing and she nodded yes or no.

From what you could tell at least one of her legs were broken but the baby was moving at least.

There had been no noise from your radio so you tuned back to the line Gabby and Brett would hear and tried "Dawson, Brett. Get the boys. I'm trapped in the North West corner near the rear fire exit. I found the pregnant woman. Her legs are pinned and I'm guessing from the heat the fire is working towards us"

-----

Everyone went silent when Gabby yelled across "SHUT THE HELL UP!" and raised her radio so they could hear your voice. You were already gasping between each word from the smoke and warning the fire was headed your way which it was. She also knew you'd die before you left someone injured.

Kevin felt his heart drop hearing your voice. You tried to keep it strong but the way it broke at the end giving way to a cough felt like someone had punched him in the gut.

Casey started barking out orders to the men to keep the fire pushed back from where you were then hollered for Kelly "Severide! You're with me" Kelly ran to his side and he looked back at Gabby "Keep her talking. We'll get to her"

-----

You had laid the radio down next to Jessica's legs and tried again to free them but it was to avail. If no one came you would both die. The burning in your lungs was getting worse and breathing was more of a task but Jessica was pregnant. There was no way you were taking the mask from her.

You were struggling to get enough air in your lungs as the surrounding area got even thicker in smoke clouding everything but Jessica from your line of view.

Suddenly the radio crackled and of all people you heard Kevin's voice come through "Sweetheart hasn't Otis told you if you wanted to play fireman you needed more training?"

You cracked a small smile and got enough smokey air into your lungs to say "Well you know me always the impatient one"

A wave of nausea hit you along with what felt like the start of a migraine and you had treated inhalation victims enough to know it was officially setting in.

"Well just slow down. Severide and Casey are coming to you. The rest of the crew is working to keep the fire back" you nodded knowing he couldn't see you and moved up to check on Jessica. She was alert and staying calm like you'd asked. When you asked how her breathing was she nodded and focused on the breaths like you told her.

"Kev the smoke is getting really bad" you admitted breaking a little when you started counting in your head the amount of minutes you'd been in here hoping you'd gotten that mask on Jessica before the smoke got too much on her and the baby and knowing if they didn't get here soon the smoke could kill before the fire had a chance.

The sound of what you knew was more portions of the building collapsing ran through the space and you worried what would happen if enough fell to block the two of you from rescue.

-----

Kevin held the radio to his forehead taking a few deep breaths before trying to talk again. Your voice was getting a hoarseness to it Gabby said wasn't good.

He knew you well enough to know you were scared. Whether for yourself, the pregnant woman in your care or both of you he wasn't sure but he knew if you were scared it was bad.

"Kevin can you keep her talking?" Gabby asked and he nodded she added "Ask her about the pregnant woman keep her mind on something else"

Before he could hit the button on the radio to talk to you again a loud crack was heard followed by Otis shouting about the fire trying to break through.

He shook his head to keep his attention fully on you instead of the insanity of the scene "Sweetheart Gabby said how's your patient doing?"

-----

You were barely holding onto consciousness at the moment when Kevin's voice cracked across the radio again. Him asking how Jessica was stirred you enough that you crawled from where you'd been squatting at her feet up to her face.

Soot was covering the mask so you wiped it off and saw her eyes were wide but she was doing the breaths you'd showed her "How ya doing?" You asked grimacing at your own voice. "I'm scared" she finally admitted.

You leaned down closer to her and whispered "I am too but we just gotta hold tight"

She nodded and laid a hand on her belly. You followed it with your eyes and saw what was probably a foot moving back and forth across her belly and smiled weakly.

You pulled the radio up to your mouth and hit the button "She's holding tight"

-----

Kevin smiled when he heard your voice again. It was the best sound in the world and he just had to keep you going just a little longer. Kelly and Casey had reported they were almost to you but portions of the roof had collapsed barring their way.

"How bout you? How you doing?" He asked into the radio praying to anything listening that the firemen would get through to you in time.

"Chest hurts like hell" you breathed and he cut his eyes at Brett who mouthed "Smoke inhalation" and felt his stomach flip.

"Well how about I talk and you can just listen and let me know you're there ok?" He offered and Brett nodded that it was ok to go that route.

-----

You were checking Jessica's pulse trying to make sure her heart was beating where it should. When you were sure it was you spoke into the radio "You always did like to talk Kev" and had to block your mouth in your arm to keep the cough from gagging you.

He hesitated and said "Well you can't run from me now how's about you tell me why you been avoiding me? Do my breath smell bad or something?"

You almost laughed "Naw Kev you smell fine. I might not right now"

You leaned over on the wall close to Jessica's head keeping a hand on her pulse at all times. "Well baby why then I miss you this is the longest we've talked in a while"

"Hard to explain Kev" you answered and leaned your bed back listening for any clue the boys were getting closer to the two of you.

-----

"Three more minutes Kev. That's all we need" Gabby whispered in his ear and he nodded.

He stepped away from everyone else to clear his own head. He had to keep his attention solely on you and only you. "Try me. I'm understanding and I know when Kelly and Casey get to you. You're gonna come out in boss mode ready to handle any and all injured out here and won't have time to talk to me till later"

------

You looked down at Jessica who was fighting to keep her eyes opened and shook her gently. She was breathing for two and even with the mask the smoke was getting to be too much. She opened her eyes and looked up at you "Who's on the radio?" "My friend" you answered and she nodded "Sounds as worried as my husband would be"

You knew another few minutes you would lose consciousness then Jessica would be right after you. You'd been breathing pure smoke for too long and god help if you passed out then her body decided the trauma was too much and her water broke.

"Kev I care about you so much" by this point you'd basically pulled Jessica's head into your lap. "I care about you too sweetheart" he answered quickly and you started coughing again using your arm to block it from Jessica.

Your eyes were drawn up and what you saw made your eyes widen. There was a large section of the floor overhead barely holding on. If a good gust of wind whipped through it would fall directly on top of the two of you.

You handed Jessica the radio and pointed up "I gotta try to move you. At least a little so hold onto the radio ok?" She nodded so you squatted again trying to use the wall as momentum to get her moved and smiled when the beam shifted enough you were able to get her legs free this time.

She cried out in pain and you saw her leg was twisted at the opposite angle it should be. You pulled her back a few more inches and moved down to check her lower half.

As far as you could find there was no open wounds. You had her free but there was no way you could get her out. You were too weak.

"Kev tell em I got her free" you breathed across the radio half collapsing next to her as you tried to get a breath that didn't burn.

-----

"SHE GOT HER FREE" Kevin hollered across to Hermman who reiterated across the radio.

Kevin's desperation cut through the air bringing you back to the bit of consciousness you were clinging to. Jessica had turned her head to look at you but she couldn't get up because of her leg and you just felt too weak.

-----

"You're doing great baby. Kelly got one more wall to get through and they'll be at you. Talk to me" he tried and when you didn't respond he felt his knees weaken "COME ON SWEETHEART ANSWER ME!"

"I love you kev. You need to know that" you spoke weakly into the radio right before you spotted a chunk of roof coming down headed for Jessica and dove blocking her face and chest with your body and felt darkness wash over you.

Kevin was dumbfounded. You just told him you loved him but was it how he loved you? Was it how he felt like he wasn't himself when the two of you didn't talk, was it how when he was with you he felt. Was it how he was standing there feeling completely helpless watching this burning burn knowing you were trapped inside?

Before he could respond to you Hermman hollered "EMTS GET READY THEY'RE COMING OUT!"

------

Kevin saw Casey first carrying a body and it was apparent from the bump that was the pregnant woman you'd went in after.

A man wearing a ups uniform ran forward as she was being loaded onto a gurney "Is she ok?" The woman ripped the scba mask off and pulled her husband into a hug "She saved me"

The woman was quickly loaded into another ambo that peeled out for med but Gabby and Slyvie were waiting on you. Kelly walked out with you in his arms. "DAWSON, BRETT SHE'S HURT AND NOT BREATHING"

Once he was clear of the building he laid you down and started cpr while Slyvie and Gabby ran forward.

Kevin hadn't realized he was moving until he felt Jay and Adam both grab him. "stay back man let them work" Adam pleaded but he couldn't. You were laying bleeding from the back of your head and you weren't breathing. He loved you more than just about anything in this world and now he wouldn't have the chance to tell you.

Otis and Hermman both joined the efforts to try to hold Kevin back. His eyes were glued to your still form and he felt his knees buckle out from underneath him when he heard Gabby holler "WE'RE LOSING HER"

#chicago pd fanfiction #chicago pd fic #kevin atwater drabble #kevin atwater x reader #one chicago fanfic

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one-leaf-grimoire · 4 years ago

Text

"illusion"

Chapter 17

this is the SFW version! Find the NSFW version here

Ao3 link to the full SFW work

"There it is... home sweet home."

I blink my eyes as I relax, still holding tightly on to Julius's arm and shirt. Sure enough, he's just whisked us right back to the Grey Deer base in his normally-instant fashion. Everything is quiet and the wind around us dies down; it's still early in the morning, and I'm sure mostly everyone is still asleep. The two of us don't move for a moment, getting our bearings once again. Finally, I release my grip and start to step away, but Julius's hand instinctively slides down my arm to link fingers with mine. I glance up at him, a little surprised. "Sorry..."

He reluctantly lets go and clears his throat. "So... tell me again. How much are we showing to the others right now?"

I take a deep breath and shrug. "None... none for now. Even though Lawrence and I aren't together any more, I don't want to make him even angrier. If he somehow finds out about us, he's going to put two and two together and realize that I was cheating on him."

"Okay, that's fair." Julius cuts me off before I can finish. "I'm sorry... this might seem selfish, but I wish I could tell everyone right away."

"I know." I smile up at him comfortingly, reaching out to take his hand one last time. "It won't be long, though... I want everyone to know you're mine, after all."

"Mine?" Julius cocks a brow playfully, squeezing my hand before releasing it. "I like the sound of that."

I shoot him a wink before walking towards the base again, before he calls out my name to stop me again. "by the way... before I forget." I look back at him and he gulps nervously. "There's something I need to talk to you about tonight... I don't want to discuss it until then though. I might have a lead on who's after you."

After the battle, breakup, and everything in between, I nearly forgot about the ongoing conspiracy. I feel the color drain from my face a little. "A-A lead?"

"Yeah. But don't worry, you should be safer going forward," Julius assures me with a smile. "Senior knights get their own room in the base, and before I left I told Hervey he should move your things into the empty room next to mine."

My eyes widen a bit at this information, but my surprise is quickly overtaken by relief. "Oh! You really did that?"

"Of course!" Julius smiles proudly to himself. "I want to make sure you're safe, so this is a convenient turn of events."

I smack his arm playfully as he chuckles, not able to disguise the newfound heat in my face. "W-whatever... We still need to be careful, though, even if I have my own room."

"If you say so~"

I can't object any more, since we finally reach the entrance of the base. It's just as quiet on the inside. "Hmm. I'll go see if anyone's in the kitchen," Julius says, squeezing my shoulder once before walking off and leaving me alone. Not sure what to do, I just turn and make my way towards my old room. Now that Julius is gone, a thick feeling of apprehension starts to build in my stomach. I should probably organize some of Alice's things... I'm sure they'll send it back to her parents soon. My heart clenches at the thought. Alice... I'll stay strong for you, I promise. I reach up and wipe away the moisture in my eyes before it can get too bad, and try to distract myself with what Julius just said.

What does he want to talk about? Come to think of it, since he arrived yesterday, something about him seemed... off. As if he, too, was apprehensive about something.

But, I'll find out about that tonight, so there's no use in worrying about it now. I finally reach my old room, my hand hesitating for just a moment before turning the knob and opening the door.

"...huh?"

I first notice that the room is a lot cleaner than I left it, only one person's belongings in it. Both twin beds are gone and are replaced with one full-sized bed. However, all of Alice's belongings are gone, leaving only my own. I thought I was moving? Julius said I would be in the room next to his-

"How's it looking?"

I draw in a sharp gasp before whipping around, surprised by the voice right behind me. I freeze as I realize that it's Captain Hervey, who stands silently in my doorway, trapping me inside.

After a moment, my panic subsides, and I manage to get words out. "I-it's nice... lots of room, at least." I turn back away from him, confusion spiraling in my brain.

I should ask... why I wasn't moved... but then-

"I didn't feel like moving you upstairs," Hervey reads my mind, almost making me jump again. His whole presence, right here, right now... it's making me deeply uncomfortable. "Plus, Elia and Cecelia are right next door if you need anything." I hear the floorboards creak, and my heart jumps into my throat. iNo, don't come in here, not any closer-

"Here-"

I look back to see Hervey holding out a list. I blink slowly, my senses still completely on guard.

"take it-'' Hervey shoves it in my face impatiently. With a soft squeak, I quickly take it from him. "I don't want you out on missions for a few days, since you're still recovering, so you're on chore duty today," my captain grunts before turning away without another glance. "Don't tire yourself out too much."

And with that, he disappears, my door creaking as it swings back closed behind him.

I draw in a shaky breath, my hands starting to tremble.

... what was that about... and even worse... I look down at the list, which is shaking like a leaf.

... I'm still so on edge... because... no matter what, I'm not safe. Not until we catch whoever is behind this conspiracy.

The safety I felt with Julius, the confidence I felt in returning... it was all just an illusion.

But I won't give up.

I clench my fist a little, crumping up the corner of my list.

I'll get through this. For Alice, for my parents, for Julius... and for myself!!!

The day goes by about as normally as I could have wanted. Most of the squad disperses after breakfast, many of them coming over to express how happy they were to see me back on my feet again.

Some of those smiles are a lie.

Julius pulls me aside at some point to apologize for his mistake. "I don't know why Hervey didn't listen to me. But at least you're still by yourself."

I promised to meet up with him after dinner tonight, and he was off to work elsewhere for the day. Now, there's nothing left for me to do but work through my chores.

1. sweep hallways

2. scrub bathroom

3. prepare dinner

4. organize basement.

The last entry on the list sends a chill up my spine so I decide to skip it for now. The first three entries provide more than enough work to fill up my day after all. The solitude is kind of nice as I make may way through every hallway, sweeping up dust and grime that's accumulated there over the past month or so. No one on the squad likes to clean; well, everyone but Alice. Alice's air magic made it easy to blow out every corner and get the job done in mere moments.

But of course, Alice isn't here to help me.

Sweep. Sweep. Sweep.

The fibers of the broom on the wooden floor are the only things making sound within the hallway. The afternoon light filters lazily in through the windows.

I should take a long nap after this... it's been a long day of work-

I freeze as I hear something from the room next to me. Huh? Is that... someone crying?

The room just happens to be the one next to my room; The room that Cecelia and Elia share. The door is open a crack, and I can't resist. I step closer, holding my breath.

Sure enough... someone in there is crying.

Clutching my broom with both hands, I finally lean forward, pushing the door slightly with my shoulder. Indeed, there's someone curled up on their bed, shaking slightly as they cry into their pillow. My eyes widen when i realize who it is, and I immediately push the door open further and stick my head in.

"C-Cecelia?"

The girl immediately sits up and looks over at me, almost fearfully. Her eyes are full of tears, and her mouth opens in surprise as she sees me.

"W-What are you doing?"

Her voice is quiet yet clearly strained, completely drained of all energy. I frown a little, but in my heart I already know what this is about. "..."

However, there's nothing I can do.

The words catch in my throat.

Cecelia... it isn't fair. I don't remember what it was like when I was your age, but I can't even imagine...

"...do you need anything?"

She shakes her head, her gaze refusing to meet mine.

"...ok. Let me know if you do." I start to turn and close the door, but then I hear her voice call out one last time.

"...I'm sorry..."

I pause and look back to see that there are tears streaking freely down her cheeks again. Her hands ball up the sheets under her, and she swallows thickly. It's a sight that would break anyone's heart, and mine is already as fragile as can be.

"Cecelia, there's nothing-"

"There is!" Her voice breaks at the outburst. "A-Alice said- she said she was going to protect me, and I p-p-promised that I would protect her- and still-"

I don't really know how to comfort her or what I'm supposed to do. But as Cecelia finally breaks under more pressure than a 15-year-old should ever carry, the only thing I can do is drop my broom and move to her side. I wrap my arms around her, and she buries her face in my shoulder.

"Cecelia... it's alright..."

I blink my eyes, tears starting to form there as well.

She shakes her head, not returning my hug.

"N-no... it's all my fault... all my fault..."

She repeats those same words over and over, and there's nothing I can do but rub her back and listen, my heart pounding as tears streak silently down my own cheeks.

It isn't fair...

I killed people in this battle. And even now, I can't look at myself in the mirror. But Cecelia, a child, saw death for the first time.

It isn't fair. Not for any of us. It's always too soon to see death.

"How was your day?"

I shrug, not really sure I want to talk about it. Julius's gaze lingers on my face for a moment before looking forward again. "I see... not so good huh."

"I'll tell you more later." I nervously look up ahead at the person leading us away from the base and into the dark woods. "Julius-" I lower my voice a little and he leans down to hear me. "You didn't mention he would be here, too..."

Despite me whispering, the man turns around to scowl at me.

Yes... for some odd reason, Julius and I are not meeting to discuss his lead alone. No, he's invited his only close friend on the squad, the eccentric Elger. I don't dislike the man, and I didn't really consider him to be overtly suspicious or anything, but I have no idea why Julius made him come with us.

"I know this is unexpected... I couldn't tell you the details of this meeting earlier, I was afraid someone would overhear." He gulps nervously. "But Elger's transcription magic is going to be crucial for determining if we have a lead or not."

I raise an eyebrow at the admission. "Wait, so you don't even know if it's an actual lead or not?"

"That's why we need Elger." Julius looks back ahead at his friend. We're quite far from the base now, and I suspect it's because he wants to leave the barrier around it. "I told him everything while we were out on a mission today."

"Yeah. It's... a lot to take in." Elger glances back at me again, his gaze a bit softer now. "I'm sorry about everything..."

I give him a little smile, not sure how to respond. Luckily I don't have to, because Elger suddenly stops in his tracks. "We're out," he says, swiftly turning. His usual staff is in hand, which he uses with his transcription magic. I'm not 100% sure how it works, but according to Julius, he's going to be a big help.

"Good. Alright..." Julius turns to look down at me, his face shadowed slightly in the moonlight. "I guess I have some explaining to do-"

"Yeah. To me, too."

We both turn, surprised when Elger speaks up again. The man narrows his eyes, his grip tightening on his staff as he glances between the two of us. "Julius... you two... you're not just helping her, are you?"

Uh oh... I gulp nervously, knowing exactly where this is going. I glance up at Julius, who has gone pale as well. He didn't tell Elger everything did he? But it seems like Elger was able to figure it out on his own.

"...I mean-"

"Whatever." Elger rolls his eyes as Julius opens his mouth to try and cover it up. "But if you wanted to be less obvious you wouldn't have told me you spent the night at the hospital last night."

Julius clears his throat, chuckling nervously. "Right... anyway-" He claps his hands together before turning back to me. "Here's the deal... yesterday, before I came to visit you, I stopped by Alice's room." My eyes widen a bit at this new information. "Listen... something about her situation didn't sit right with me. During the battle, the General that Hervey ad I were fighting managed to escape. Hervey followed him, and I stayed behind to make sure he wasn't pursued by other soldiers. Then, but the time I caught up-"

"Hervey killed the general, and the general attacked Alice," I finished, having heard this story from Hervey himself. "What didn't sit right with you?"

"... I wasn't sure. But my doubts grew over time. The battle was over in seconds. Yet the general had time to fatally injure Alice before Hervey dispatched him."

Each word sows a new seed of doubt in my own mind. "So... what does that have to do with Alice? Why did you visit her?"

"To get this."

Julius pulls something out of his pocket. It's a tiny vial, filled with a silvery-white substance. It glitters and swirls, and lights up our faces as we stare down at it. My eyes widen. "What... what is that?"

"It's mana. Elger lent me a magical item that allowed me to extract it from Alice's frozen brain." Julius grimly holds it up, then hands it to Elger. "With just this little bit... Elger should be able to replicate the original user's spells with his transcription magic."

I watch, still not quite understanding, as Elger opens up the vial.

The battle was over in seconds... does Julius think that Alice wasn't attacked by the General?

The mana is immediately absorbed by the tip of his staff, which begins to glow.

Then... then who...

My eyes widen as the magic is amplified, bathing the entire area in its power. It's cold, and sharp, a feeling that all ice mages carry with them. The General was an ice mage, though, so this should add up-

"...I thought so. I hoped I wasn't right."

I look up at the sound of Julius's voice, and almost get scared by the look on his face. For a brief second, I almost feel like he's mad at me, and seeing the same expression on Elger's face only further solidifies that belief. I gulp nervously, clenching my fists so they don't start shaking from fear and the cold. "G-Guys, what are you-"

"Ice magic:" Elger cuts me off as he raises his staff up. "Ice Domain."

...

Ice Domain?

But... that's-

Thin, flaky ice suddenly appears in the air around us, descending upon us in a dome. A moment later, it dissolves away, but I can still feel its presence in the air. It's a feeling I know well, even if I don't realize it all the time. For years and years, I woke up, worked, laughed, fought, and trained beneath that dome.

"N-No way..."

"Julius, you were right," Elger says softly. He lowers his staff, and the spell dissipates, but my fear is only strengthening. Julius reaches out, his hand landing on my shoulder. I hardly feel it, because my skin is completely numb.

It can't be... why...

Finally, Julius speaks.

"The spell that attacked Alice didn't come from the General. It came from Captain Hervey."

#illusion #fic #julius novachrono #julius novachrono x reader

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blukrown · 4 years ago

Text

Not Meant To Be - Chapter 6

Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4 - Chapter 5

Also available on AO3

WARNING! This fic contains: blood/violence, torture & implied/reference sexual assault

If any of these upset you, please do not read!

Conflicting Notions

Blood covered Faris' hands and his chest heaved. He could feel his body shaking from adrenaline as he looked transfixed at the mess that covered his hands. Even with the cheers of the Colosseum crowd, his heartbeat was deafening in his ears. Thumping as he looked down to the ground before him.

A man lay limp at his feet. Curled up with both hands clutching onto the sword that still stuck out from his side.

Dead.

"No . . ." Faris gasped, taking a step back in the sand. "I'm not supposed to be here. N-No I don't-"

Turning around to run, he felt chains hold him still. The echoes of the dungeons in the colosseum filled with wails, pleas and moans of the innocent slaves.

Faris' nose stung of piss and blood making him want to hurl. He was stopped from gagging when a sting so harsh he fell to his knees whipped his back.

Laughter resonated in his ears as the crack and sting of whipping soon left his back warm with his own blood.

"P-Please," Faris moaned, his body shaking in fear. "I d-don't belong here." Shutting his eyes as tight as he could, he prayed to any god, goddess or deity to free him.

The pain stopped but when Faris opened his eyes he wasn't in heaven. But in hell.

Dark and tinted orange by candlelight, floor covered in pillows while the walls were draped with curtains. And a stench of smoke and alcohol made his nose wrinkle. The whorehouse brought a look of sheer horror to Faris' features.

A hand touched his shoulder, roving down his chest and caressing his pectorals. Another followed, combing through his dreads and tugging harshly on the strands.

"S-Stop it!" Faris objected, turning to look at his assailant but only saw dark walls.

Another disembodied hand touched the small of his back, eagerly travelling to touch his rear and-

"Fuck!" Faris swore as he tried to move his arms but felt two strong hands clench his wrists to restrain him. "Don't touch me! Don't you dare!" Faris belowed, fear coating his words.

The hand in his hair pulled harder, making Faris' head sting. What felt like claws grazed along his scalp as fingers tucked under the waistband of his trousers.

"I don't belong here!" Faris declared, trying to look around. But all he saw were the whorehouse walls, seeming to enclose him in the already claustrophobic space.

"T-Teb," Faris whimpered, losing much of his will to fight. "Where are you?!"

He was scared. Horrified. He was like a little deer, shaking in the cold winter with no doe of a mother to care for him. He was a shell of a man. Numb to the whips, the hands and the blood.

"P-please," Faris implored, as he closed his eyes as tight as he could. "T-Tebanam."

"FARIS!" Tebanam shouted, hands clutching at the other man's arms to shake him from his disturbing dream. "WAKE UP, DAMMIT!"

Faris' eyes flashed open as he bolted upright. His lungs gasping for air as he darted his head to look at his surroundings. His skin was cool with cold sweat while his bones felt as jittery as a leaf.

Tebanam, only a shadow in the darkroom took him into a hug. Squeezing Faris as close to him as he could.

"Shhh," Tebanam hushed him. One hand holding the back of Faris' head. "It's ok. It's ok. You're not there anymore. You're here with me."

"N-No," Faris' voice shook as his eyes still tried to look at his surroundings. As if, at any second, they could change back to the whorehouse or colosseum dungeon. "I-I'm not I was . . . I was w-with them and-"

"It was a nightmare, Faris." Tebanam persisted, rocking the horrified man in his arms. "You are far, far away from Al-Daida."

"Y-You're wrong," Faris objected, shaking his head. "I'm a b-brute, a monster, a who-"

"Shut up," Tebanam ordered, squeezing tighter - if that were possible-. "No you're not. You're Faris. You're my love." His voice was shaky, clearly off put by seeing Faris so fear-stricken. "You are none of those things. You are a kind and loving man. W-Who is safe and l-loved." The prince's voice shook on the last words, as his resolution choked at the sight of Faris continuing fright.

Faris didn't try to protest anymore. Shivering in his partner's arms until soon, his stiffened body softened. Letting the warmth of Tebanam's embrace consume him, he felt tears well up in his eyes. For the first time in over a year, Faris cried.

Tebanam didn't say a word, only held him close and kissed him until the sorrowful man soon nodded off to sleep.

"Prince Tebanam!" A loud knock echoed past the bedroom door as a servant's voice called for Tebanam's attention.

"Yes?" The man called in a groan.

"Your highness and . . . Faris have been asked to visit Princess Kanisa for lunch." The voice said, pausing as if to ponder just what to call Tebanam's lover. "She asked for you both to be by her quarters in an hour."

"Thank you." Tebanam responded, waiting for the footsteps to grow faint before looking down to where Faris still lay.

Faris had his eyes shut tightly, as if trying to hold onto the ever so slight chance he could return to sleep. He had managed one proper hour but otherwise, the rest of the night passed in a sort of half-unconscious sleep, where he would faintly feel his mind doze off before a flash of a crowded coliseum, crack of a whip, or the sinister smell of the incense lord Siek had liked before snapping back into dream-riddled reality.

When the bodyguard finally went to open his eyes, he looked up to Tebanam. Faris only needed to give him a glance to know the prince had had even worse luck with sleeping than him. Dark shadows hung under his eyes, clearly visible through the bright light emitting from the curtained window.

The prince was sitting up, book in his lap and back resting on the bed's headboard. When Faris looked to the paperback in his lover's fingers, he noticed he was already three-fourths through the rather thickly paged novel. If he recalled correctly, Tebanam had only just started the book the night before, only finishing a few chapters before having abandoned it for sleep. Clearly, he had been reading all night.

"I'm sorry," Faris muttered, scooting over to rest his head in Tebanam's lap.

"What for, dear?" Tebanam asked, tenderly stroking the side of Faris' face.

"For keeping you awake. You didn't sleep at all after my . . . nightmare, did you?"

Tebanam was silent, whether thinking or still concentrating on his book, Faris couldn't tell. "No need to apologise. I've never been good at falling back asleep anyway."

But still, Faris thought, guilt still weighing in his chest.

"Anyhow, I can just go to sleep early tonight to make up for it." Tebanam said, trying to cheer Faris up. "Besides, we have to get ready to see Kanni."

"What do you think she wants to talk about?" Faris asked, sitting up to allow the prince to get out of bed.

Tebanam let out a chuckle. "She doesn't need a reason, Faris. She's my sister. It's honestly about time we sat down and talked properly. Hopefully, we'll get to see the kids too."

Faris supposed he was right, one didn't need a reason to want to see family. But it wasn't like he knew better. The term family was something that was still very foreign to the man. Especially considering where Faris had come from.

The bodyguard could not help but think of Tebanam's family, how warm and considerate they all were. The Dragmire family was also a tight unit and would very clearly tear the world apart for each other. Faris felt hopeful when he found himself watching Tebanam get ready. His mind wondered if he and Tebanam, if all went well, could create something like that. Create a family. Maybe even with a kid or two. Even with how raw his chest stung from recent events - not to mention the horror of that dream - the concept of Tebanam and him growing old together, happy and content, eased Faris like not many things could.

"Faris?" Tebanam called out, dragging his partner out of his still sleep-ridden stupor. "What's the matter?"

"What?" Faris mumbled, suddenly alert, blinking as he realised that Tebanam was now fully dressed and waiting for Faris to follow suit. "Oh . . . Sorry."

Getting up, Faris caught the look of worry that flashed in the prince's eyes as he watched him get ready.

"You know we could say 'no' to Kanni's invite," Tebanam said firmly, watching Faris pull on a white tunic.

Faris could not help but smile. Even if he dreaded leaving the safety and quiet of their quarters, he knew it was the best for both of them. Even if there was discomfort in the thought of talking to people so important yet so unfamiliar.

"I'll be fine, Tebanam," Faris said, resting a hand on his partner's shoulder as if he was the one that needed comforting. "Besides, I'm sure you miss her. You only managed to talk to her a little bit yesterday, right?"

"I suppose . . ." Tebanam muttered, giving Faris a hand as he climbed into the rather tight-fitting trousers. "But if you want to come back here at any moment, just say. It's practically all I can do for you while we hunt down the bastard who let word spread."

"Thank you, Tebanam," Faris said, turning to wrap his arms around his prince's neck and giving him a quick kiss. Now more than ever, he had to make sure Tebanam knew just how thankful he was to be here with him.

Even with the mere twenty paces from their bedchamber door, Faris was grateful this part of Hyrule castle was deserted apart from the skittering of a single servant moving from a distant royal chamber. At the very least, he would not have to deal with hearing the horrible remarks of the other occupants of the castle. He only just had to deal with Tebanam's sister. Easy right?

Well, at first, it was indeed easy.

Kanisa had welcomed the couple into her quarters like they were entering her very own home. Offering them tea and a snack from the assorted platter of baked sweets surely brought up to satiate the growing hunger of her two children.

Kanisa's bedroom quarters was like a mirror image of Tebanam's. Except while the younger brother's windows faced the morning sun, Kanisa's faced the beautiful garden of the castle two floors below. Without even going to see through the glass, Faris could see the tops of high hedges, well-trimmed vines and flower beds full of colourful petals. The only other difference was that there was two doors that connected to the bedroom, one to a bathroom and - from Faris' guess - the children's room.

The sister Kanisa was beautiful, Faris knew that much. Although taller, tanner and carrying much of her Gerudo father in her, the princess's true beauty came from her mother. She had the queen's fine features and kind smile that would have surely been the splitting image of her mother when she was her age. She also had the grace of the queen. She glided more than she walked, spoke kindly but not frivolously and knew the perfect amount of strictness and praise to keep the children from harassing their guests too much. Although that did soon backfire.

Kanisa had clearly invited Tebanam and Faris for the purpose of properly catching up with her brother in addition to acquainting herself with her brother's lover. But no less than ten minutes after first entering, Tebanam had been dragged into a game of knights and dragons with Kanisa's children, Kerugan and Audlin.

Both too young to comprehend or pronounce their uncle's full first name, Audlin called him Teddy, while Kerugan - only a year or two older than Audlin by the looks - felt too dignified to call him by such a baby-like name, as he proudly pointed out, and called him Uncle Teb instead.

Faris, who had worried that since he had never really talked to a child before, had been struck with the horrible realisation that, if the children did not like him, then Kanisa would surely follow? But, thankfully, those fears were soon dashed away. As, after only a few minutes of ogling and invasive yet innocent questions, the two kids were grinning at Faris as much as they did their uncle.

Audlin, who still could not quite enunciate 's' excitedly called him Fairy, with delighted giggles. While the mature acting Kerugan went with Uncle Faris. Although the gesture was small, Faris felt a faint smile warming his face at the nicknames they had given him. The children were so adorable, in fact, that Faris was almost completely fine with Tebanam obeying his niece and nephews demands to play with them. The sight of which made Faris' chest wriggle with a deep sense of love for the man as the prince made the children guffaw with laughter. The only negative to this being now Faris was stuck alone with Kanisa and her surly looking husband, Vidar.

Kanisa, well-trained in the matters of polite conversation, had asked about how Faris was and how he was managing living in the castle - as if this question had not been asked by everyone since he arrived.

Tebanam had let out a playful rawr as his designated role of the dragon and Kerugan foolishly jumped to protect his little sister only to be swiped up in his uncle's strong arms in an act of kidnap. The Fairy Princess Warrior Emperess Audlin had a small thin wooden sword in her hand and she ordered the nasty monster to let go of her big brother or else.

Kanisa was just starting to ask Faris if they had considered traveling towards Uskar when the 'or else' revealed itself to be Audlin whaking Tebanam's shines with her mock sword until Tebanam fell to his knees.

"Kanni! Fairy Princess - ouch - Warrior - Ow! - Audlin is so - oow - cruel!" Tebanam fake sobbed, still holding the wriggling Kerugan above his head so as the child would not be hit by his sister's furious swipes.

Kanisa had given Faris an apologetic look before getting to her feet to help her brother. The mother scolded her daughter for playing too rough, her son for laughing at it and then at her brother for encouraging them. But this did not spoil the fun, as a matter of fact, since Kanisa soon became the new damsel in distress as Audlin said Tebanam was too powerful even for her, so she needed her brother's help.

In spite of how greatly bemusing it was to see Tebanam laughing hedonistically as he buried Kanisa in a pile of the children's soft toys, Faris soon realised he was not alone. Vidar, who had been silent while Kanisa had talked to Faris, still sat in his chair. And, although for a moment, the two men had quietly smiled over their respective partners, Vidar broke his stoic silence.

"I heard those rumours." Vidar said curtly, a hint of an accent in his voice.

Faris stiffened immediately. Taking his eyes away from the heartwarming scene at the other side of the room. And, for the first time, Faris properly looked at Vidar.

With blue-ish skin, dark thick hair in a braid, he most definitely looked like a man from a world very far from the room he sat in. He, like Faris, was covered with scars of a life of fighting. But the bodyguard noted how they were different from his. Mainly of wild animals and other horrible beasts of the northern world, Faris had heard, unlike the man-made swords and knives that marked Faris' forearms and whip slashes in his back. Even so, the man was clearly a warrior, with the heavy muscles that bulge in his Hyrulian tunic and worn, callous covered hands. Although intimidating, Faris had to admit that Vidar was also a good-looking man, even with the slight frown furrowing his brow and prettily embroidered eyepatch - surely made by his wife - covering his right eye.

Faris did not reply to Vidar's words, too shocked to speak but also feeling cautious. He had learned in these past few days to be wary, especially now that there was someone who was spreading his secrets.

Vidar did not seem to need Faris to speak. The sentence appeared to be more of a way to get his full attention rather than to insult or tease him. As he then furthered, "I know it is not anything like what is said about you but I went through very much the same."

Vidar paused to scratch as his well kept beard, and Faris' slight frown was all he gave him. So the Uskarian continued.

"I met Kanisa on the first diplomatic visit of Uskar to Hyrule. We kept our . . . relationship a secret at first. But when I returned and soon took their dear princess away to Uskar, the people of Hyrule made up all kinds of rumours. I was called a rapist, a barbarian, a beast. They believed I had seduced, stole or even kidnapped Kanisa and held her for ransom."

Vidar's body did not betray his anger apart from the deep set frown that adorned his face. "My first time returning back to Hyrule after marrying Kanni and having Kerugan . . . It was awful. I did not fear them but I definitely watched my back at each turn, as if I might do something wrong, more horrible accusations would be made. I can only be thankful those same whispers weren't about Kerugan. They just believed him to be an innocent baby born of . . ." Vidar paused as his lips clenched together in disgust.

Faris, hoping to not force the man into saying anything he didn't want to, spoke. "Then . . . How did they change? I've only heard great things about you."

Vidar smiled for the first time, it suited him much better than the curt look he had shown since they arrived. "Time, mostly. But it helped to have Zarazu."

Faris recalled that Zarazu, Covarog's wife and the future queen of Hyrule, was born outside of the Hyrule realm too. Once an island full of magic, calamity had struck and had forced the already small population of Lorleidians into refuge in Hyrule. A bunch of magic users and dragon tamers, now that Faris thought about it, would have surely been a horrifying sight for the dignified council members of Hyrule.

"As the future queen and mother of Coverog's children, she fought for the first few years to ensure the refuges, both Lorleidians and others were welcomed and treated as fairly as any Hyrulian."

"Just like that?" Faris asked confusedly.

Vidar let out a huff of a laugh, "No, nothing that simple. Although having the queen and Ralnor is a huge help, most of it comes from proving doubters wrong."

Faris did not seem satisfied with this explanation. In fact, the bodyguard frowned. This very same notion had been offered up by Queen Zelda but . . .

"How can I prove I'm not a slave . . . When they are right?" Faris asked. It was the first time he had asked the question that had been poisoning his mind for hours.

Vidar frowned at this. "Are you saying you're still a barbarian then?" "What?" "And a murderer? And a slave? And a whore? Are you still those things?"

Hearing the words from a near-to-almost stranger made Faris extremely uncomfortable but he understood Vidar's point.

No, he wasn't anymore. He was a free man. Not just that but a bodyguard to a prince and a lover to that very same man. He was someone who had become a better and a more whole person since those days before Tebanam had freed him.

"N-No," Faris admitted. Looking to the teacups that sat abandoned in their saucers on the table they sat at. The dregs cold yet still making small waves in the cups from the trundling of children's feet nearby.

"Then how are they true?" Vidar asked. Looking right into Faris' eyes when he braved a look at the man. "If you're not any of those things, then prove it."

Faris opened his mouth to question Vidar's logic only to be reminded that, out of all the people who had told him this fact, the Uskarian man was the only one who had actually experienced it.

"How . . . ?" Faris asked hollowly.

How could one prove a negative? When for all tense and purposes, they were true. Faris was disheartened to realise that Vidar had lowered his spirits more than he had raised them.

"It is . . . A grueling task, I have to admit. If it was a fight, I, or you, or Zarazu could easily win it but . . . Living and being with royalty is a fight very different from anything else. Although us partners don't carry the weight of the realm on our shoulders, they do."

Vidar let his eyes drift to look at his wife. Mouth clenched shut and eyes closed, the princess was shaking with repressed laughter as she pretended to be in a deep sleep. Audlin, now the evil witch, had made the pretty damsel fall into a deep sleep and only the brave Kerugan could save her. Tebanam, meanwhile watched, clearly a prisoner that the witch would deal with later.

"Anything we do, whether good or bad reflects back on the family. And endangers or aids them. Whether big or small. It is a reality we have to accept if we want to be with a princess or prince."

Faris was silent. Unsure what to say.

Looking to Tebanam, who cheered for Kerugan as the child defied the evil witch of a sister, he found himself torn.

Faris was in love with the man. The kind, energetic adventurer he had met that hot day in the colosseum dungeons in Al-Daida. The man who had freed him from his masters and promised food, clothing and shelter for only his sword and knowledge of the local culture. The man who had treated him as an equal, a companion and later a lover.

Faris realised that he was not exactly sure if he was in love with the prince. And the thought made him uneasy.

The fact that Tebanam was a prince was, indeed, shocking at first but, Faris might not have completely comprehended what that meant. He had an image of a bright gold crown and matching throne, with mountains of the finest of fabrics, shiniest of treasures and sweetest of delicacies. He had never much wondered or asked about what that life may actually entail.

"What I'm trying to say," Vidar said, his voice calling Faris to look back at him. "Is that . . . Although it's bad now, it will get better. If you are a good and free man, who loves Tebanam, then those rumours will die down. Keep being the man you know you are and people will realise they were wrong . . . or at least not talk against you. It is hard, and . . . tolling at times but," Vidar's eyes flickered again to Kanisa and his two children. "But it is worth it. Every second of it."

Tebanam's laughter was then loud, sounding like the sweetest of music to Faris' ears.

"So don't give up."

Tebanam landed on the ground flat on his ass for the second time that afternoon. Yelping as his tailbone hit the ungiving earth of the training grounds.

The sky was a faint orange, the sun a few hours from vanishing over the castle walls. The area for knights and guardsmen had been vacated as most were still on shift or busy eating dinner. Leaving the sound of two men huffing and puffing to be the only noise apart from the whistling of summer wind through the single tree in the area.

Tebanam, rubbing his backside, was soon covered by shadow as Jazoh stood above him.

Sweat glistened on the nobleman's forehead yet he did not show any sign of being out of breath.

Tebanam let out a sigh. "I'm sorry I'm not much of a challenge for you." A wry smile playing at his lips.

"Not at all," Jazoh smiled back, "I'm just happy you volunteered."

Tebanam snorted, "I volunteered to vent out my anger. Not get my ass handed to me."

"Then why didn't you ask your bodyguard to spar with you then?" Jazoh offered, extending his hand to pull his companion up.

Tebanam ignored the odd choice of word as he took his friend's hand to get to his feet. "Speaking of which, I really should've invited Faris along. At least then you would've had a worthy opponent."

Jazoh frowned slightly as he let go of the prince's hand. "Then why didn't you?" His voice was cold as he turned around to pick up Tebanam's sword, a falchion.

"Well . . . He's been going through a lot at the moment." The Gerudo prince remarked as he took the sword from Jazoh's hand. "He was pretty tired from playing with Kanisa's kids and I don't think he likes the idea of leaving our area of the castle. You know . . . With all the rumours and secrets flying around." There was then Faris' face when Tebanam had come over to him and Vidar at the table, how confused and troubled his eyes were when he looked at him. But he would not tell Jazoh that.

"But that's it, Tebanam." Jazoh said flatly, his eyes not on him but looking at his wooden sword. "They're just rumours. It's the only thing the servants have to do really. Gossip and make up stories."

"But still," Tebanam muttered, frowning as he warily watched his friend. "Those things really hurt him. It's been so long since I've seen him that upset . . . It's honestly taking all my strength not to punch the next person I hear talking about him." The prince squeezed his hands around the handle of his sword, remembering just how shaken his love had been that very morning. It scared him a little, to think a man so strong could become so scared.

Jazoh let out a huff, "Punching is for stableboys and knights who drop their swords." He brandished his mock weapon aloft. "You are a prince. Just say the word and you could get rid of all of them."

Tebanam should be surprised by Jazoh's threatening words but he knew better. He did not mean kill them, just punish or confront. A younger Tebanam might even agree with him. Yet, he felt uncomfortable with his friend's idea of stopping the whispers. Enough so for him to end the conversation.

"Another round, then?" Tebanam asked as he eyed the sword the nobleman clutched in his hand. "Go easy on me?"

Jazoh gave a handsome smile that wrinkled the beauty spot under his eye. "Oh my dear Tebanam, you told me to never go easy on you, why should I start now?"

"Because my ass hurts and I've already been brutalized by my niece."

Jazoh let out an airy chuckle, "Audlin?"

Tebanam let out a laugh too, "Yeah, how about you teach her a few tricks?"

"Tempting," Jazoh remarked with a look of consideration, "Then again, I'd have to get past that father of hers."

"True," The prince agreed, "Although, I have a feeling Vidar would happily have his kids taught by you."

"In any case," Jazoh said, breaking conversation. "Shall we begin?"

"Lets."

Just as the words left Tebanam's mouth, the shorter man striked. His thin rapier blade jumped out to hit Tebanam in the chest to only, by the last second, be blocked by the back of Tebanam's sword. The clunk was loud in the empty grounds as Tebanam used his strength to parry the frail sword away. Sadly, his reflexes were nothing like Faris'. Who would be in for the attack as soon as the Hyrulians' guard was down. Instead, Tebanam had taken too long to move, giving the expert swordsman time to find his balance and fix his stance.

"Not bad . . ." Jazoh muttered, looking over Tebanam's form. "I can tell you've had practice. You're definitely stronger." The Hyrulian then rolled his right shoulder, the one that had felt the full blow of Tebanam's parry.

The Gerudo grinned, proud to hear Jazoh's hint of surprise. "I have travelling to thank for that. Carrying all my things on my back every day turns out to be a really good way to gain muscles. Well . . . That and fighting off thieves and monsters and so on."

"Don't get too cocky, Tebanam." The nobleman said sternly. "I don't want to go wounding this new pride of yours."

"Oh please," The prince laughed, "I've still got a few tricks up my-"

His opponent was suddenly gone.

Taking a stride much bigger than one for his size, the man moved to Tebanam's left.

"Shit!"

With his sword not in position to block - as he had stupidly let down his guard to quip at him - Tebanam had no way to stop the sword from slicing him half open. So all he could do was dodge the surely painful swipe from the would-be blade. Feeling the faint whoosh as the sword cut through the air where Tebanam had previously been.

Jazoh, expecting a definite hit, had not been ready for the unexpected swerve out of reach and followed through. His sword going past his front to swing around to his side.

This was his chance.

Taking the needed two strides to reach him, Tebanam took it in one. Pulling back the wide-bladed wooden sword to cut at Jazoh's weak point.

But just when Tebanam's first win against his ex-sword teacher flashed before his eyes, it was gone.

His blade had been stopped.

Not by the expected clothed side of the nobleman but rather the slender blade of the Hyrulian's rapier. The sleeves of his freshly pressed tunic rolled up neatly to his elbow, Jazoh's thin yet defined pale arms jittered slightly under the impact of the larger man's cut. But he held steady.

Tebanam knew, then, that winning by brains was impossible. He had never outsmarted the man, both in sword and in wit, ever since they were boys. But Tebanam had something he didn't have last time.

The muscles of the prince's arms ached from the previous fights but he demanded them to hold. Pushing his fake falchion against the rapier, the thin sword shook under the newfound strength. Tebanam could see the man sweating, gritting his teeth as he tried to hold his ground. But Jazoh's grip on the blade was weakening. By the second, both hilts shook as the smaller man strained to keep the prince's blade from going any closer to his yet unhit body.

Tebanam, perhaps too hopeful at attaining his first win at last, forgot a simple lesson.

When it came down to strength, committing to pushing the opponent down to submission only worked when done quickly. At this rate, Jazoh would find a way to escape-

Just as the thought came to mind, the force that had once been pushing back against his falchion was gone.

Jazoh had released the weakened block and as quick as ever, moved out of Tebanam's way. What with the prince's weight and stance leaning heavily forward, the Gerudo found himself falling forwards.

Quickly, he ducked his head and Tebanam had just enough time to tuck his body down and roll on the ground. Nonetheless, he only had a moment to get back on his feet before Jazoh was onto him once more.

The nobleman knew that anymore moves that challenged Tebanam's sheer strength would result in his loss. For that reason, Jazoh went with a barrage.

Leading with the blunt end of his slender sword, the Hyrulian swordsman tried to poke right past Tebanam's guard to hit him in the chest. And the prince's only saving grace was that the width of the side of his blade was enough to hinder the individual jabs. The falchion, however, did not stop the opponent from nearing and forcing Tebanam to retreat with each painful looking thrust.

While Tebanam was focused on blocking each of the well intentioned hits, Jazoh was taking it all in his stride. Even beginning to talk to the prince as the air still filled the clunking, whacking and thumping of the two swords clashing.

"Sometimes I wonder what would've happened if I wasn't sent away." Even with the din of the barrage, Jazoh's voice was clear.

It took all of Tebanam's effort to listen to the man while still keeping his focus. But even with his brain frantically instructing his arms and legs to react to each trying jab, his mind still questioned why Jazoh was talking about such a topic so suddenly. The prince could only think that this was one of his friend's backhanded tactics, just like the swipe at Faris' legs and the kick of sand he had seen just two days prior.

Hoping to use this same trick against him, Tebanam indulged in the conversation. Even as his feet still took cautious steps backwards.

"No, I haven't really thought about it," Tebanam said gruffly, blocking a particularly energetic cut near his shoulder.

"Would it be rude for me to say I did?"

"No . . . Especially from how hard your life would've been on that farm, I wouldn't blame you for wondering."

"Well, if you don't mind me saying, I believed-" Jazoh paused.

Tebanam had taken a lucky chance to parry when he caught sight of a weaker strike. This had turned out to be a faint and the prince had played right into the nobleman's hands. Jazoh let the parry miss his blade to leave Tebanam unguarded and the wooden rapier's edge at his throat. It looked like only a twig up close but the Gerudo had a feeling that even a needle would be deadly in the experienced hands of Jazoh Spegeil.

"- that we would still be together." Jazoh continued calmly. As if Tebanam had merely interrupted him with a sneeze rather than a try to win the losing spar. "And by that, I mean still in love."

The game had been won. Why Jazoh continued on with this conversation, Tebanam did not know. But he had a feeling that this was his friend's way of finding where they stood.

It worried him to think this may cause Jazoh to feel hurt or upset. But the prince knew it was best to speak clearly and honestly now, or he may as well never speak at all.

"You think so?" Tebanam asked. Letting his sword hang at his side. Indicating that he would yield. "I honestly wouldn't know."

The prince fanned himself, the overexertion of the fight soon leading to a loud thumping of his heart and for the heat of his racing blood to catch up and starting to heaten his skin.

"Why?" Jazo inquired with the slightest of frowns.

"Well," Tebanam began, looking down to his attire.

With most of his clothes having been disposed of when his mother caught sight of the pile of worn and staining clothes he called his closet, the only remnants of the collection he had left were on his person. A worn old pair of shoes that Tebanam had implored his queen mother to leave only after explaining how new shoes would bring blisters and calluses before fitting, and thick heartily-sewn trousers a brown so dark the queen looked over them as new. The tunic he wore was new, however. The fabric so soft and new that Tebanam sweated right through it. The prince had also worn a vest which lay under the shade of the single tree after being abandoned after only a few minutes into sparring.

Walking to the lonely shade of the tree, Jazoh following beside him, Tebanam continued.

"Well, I still wanted to leave. To travel, you know." When under the refuge of the leaf-heavy tree from the hot setting sun, Tebanam pulled the tunic over his head to free his clammy chest to the occasional wind that blessed the grounds. "I always wanted to go. Eventually. You leaving was a catalyst for it. It gave me an excuse to leave and chase my dreams."

Tebanam did not look at his companion. Busying himself with folding the found vest and sweaty tunic into a pile in his lap. He took his time with it, too guilty to look his old friend in the eyes.

Even without looking to Jazoh, he could hear his hurt. Or maybe it was anger? The prince could not tell, as he could only note the flicker in his voice because his words did not indicate much. "And you believe you would leave me here?"

"Well . . . Not for long. I would've visited like I do now. Besides," The Gerudo braved a look at Jazoh, hoping this would give him some sort of comfort. "I would've let you come with me, if you like."

There it was, that furrowed brow again. And the dark, almost cold look in his eyes as he looked at him.

"I don't quite understand." The Spegeil said, raising his head to the castle walls that surrounded all sides. No, he was looking past that. To the world outside of Hyrule castle. Maybe even outside Hyrule itself. "I don't understand what you like about leaving here. I mean . . . What's worth leaving all of this?"

"That's where you're getting confused, Jazoh." Tebanam said, keeping in mind to sound kind as he spoke. "It's nothing about leaving or losing. I'm free out there. With a hood and modest clothing, I'm just a tall stranger in the crowd. A man with just a little more gold in his pocket and just a little more knowledge. And in any case, I gain so much from going out there." Tebanam could not help showing the excitement, remembering just how much of the world he had not yet explored. "There are whole worlds full of history, culture and stories. Although I search to recover the histories of my people, the lands and people I meet along the way teach me so much more than any of the books in the castle's library could ever offer."

The prince had let his eyes trail off. Looking, just like Jazoh had done, over the wall. To the cities, towns, shrines, caves and crypts he had yet to explore. The thought of Faris being there beside him. Protecting him when his idiocy got the better of him, telling him off when his eyes wondered on either men or a useless expensive item, laughing at his jokes and his foolishness, blushing at his compliments and kissing him back when Tebanam kissed him.

When Tebanam looked around, Jazoh was so much closer than before. Or at least he thought he was. A man could surely sit in the middle of them earlier, in the space Jazoh had left between them, now Tebanam could see very well the details of his once lover's face.

He was very good looking, the prince was reminded. With the obvious beauty spot under his eye standing out on his pale, yet faintly freckled face.

A younger Tebanam may have almost swooned at the sight of the mature and cool looking nobleman before him. Now, well, when he saw how close the Hyrulian was he almost jumped out of the way. And by the manner those dark eyes darted between his own to his lips, made uncomfortable goosebumps wriggle up the skin of his arms and neck.

Turning his head, he quickly got to his feet.

"Welp, we uh better get cleaned up then if we don't want to miss dinner." The prince said, trying to feign an air of indifference. As if he didn't notice Jazoh moving in for a kiss. "Will you be joining me in the bath house then?" Tebanam did not look at his companion, not wanting to see whether disappointment or annoyance lingered in those handsome eyes.

Jazoh only needed a moment before replying. "Yes, I suppose we shall. You go on ahead, I'll clean up."

Tebanam had the thought of offering to help or just wait for the Hyrulian to finish but the concept of staying any longer with Jazoh alone made him apprehensive. Especially when he thought about Faris, alone in their quarters. So Tebanam only nodded and made his way out of the training grounds.

Not once looking back.

Jazoh's prince left his shirt and vest behind. Surely so desperate to leave that the striped clothes had slipped his mind. The Spegeil did not mind, however.

He waited until the footsteps of Tebanam were gone before picking up the two pieces of clothing. The vest was a dark blue with gold embroidery around each hole and button. It had suited him very well. With his white tunic and dark pants, short red hair and brandishing his sword in their first of multiple bouts, he looked like the prince he should rightfully be.

Then again, the same design had been worn by that barbarian warrior Tebanam saw fit to call his love. The thought of that man dancing in a blue this shade, with the Hyrule prince in his arms made Jazoh want to rip the very cloth apart. But he knew better.

Tebanam was not stupid enough to forget his clothing.

Laying the vest on his lap, Jazoh took up the tunic.

It was a common nobleman style tunic, of a fine enough fabric it could only be owned by the higher class. The strings that had been untied dangled over the fabric as the nobleman remembered just how handsome the prince looked for the few moments without his shirt on.

Once again, the thought of Faris, getting to see Tebanam in such a way caused a venomous fury to bubble in his chest. And once again, he did not let his hands tear the fabric in his frustration.

Instead, he lifted the sweat infused top to his face and breathed in the scent of it.

Jazoh could not quite explain the scent but whatever it was, it smelled like Tebanam. Not of some musk or perfume or the reek that surely emintated from Faris' diritied pores. No, it smelled just as he remembered.

It was the same as the last time he had detected it. The last time they had embraced.

Foolish teens thrilled with the idea of being heard but never caught, suspected but never seen. Kissing and fondling even as footsteps approached. Adventurous hands and gifted soft moans as a door flew open.

The recollection made him both sad and angry. How foolish he had been.

If he had only tamed his own daring and convinced the prince to not take the risk. Tebanam's bedchamber would have been the headquarters of years of such activity. And yet, they had been caught. And Jazoh was sent away. The last thing of Hyrule he saw was the peak he could see through the carriage window before his father had hit him. It had been of the sun rising on the intimidating build of wood and stone that he would not return to for over five years.

Jazoh could easily recollect what he had thought then.

I'll be back. I'll be back for you.

Even after finding himself back in the mirrored halls and tall walls, Jazoh still had not achieved what he had sworn all those years ago. But not long now. It was only a matter of time.

This fic is based on the Zelgan au by @figmentforms

The Zelgan babies & granbabies, as well as Faris and Jozah, are created by @s-kinnaly and @ridersoftheapocalypse

And special thanks to @ridersoftheapocalypse for writing the main fanfic about Tebanam and Faris, which inspired this fic

As well as @quietpastelcolours for their writings on Vulkar and Kanisa

I highly recommend you look at their content on this to have a better understanding of the story

#zelgan #zelgan babies #not meant to be #tebanam #Faris #fanfic

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missperfectlyfine13 · 4 years ago

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A Bandaid For Your Bullet Hole (Chp. 3/?)

Read Below or on AO3/FF

“Where are you headed? Is Jake coming home this year?” Aubrey’s voice makes Chloe’s head snap up from her suitcase.

She looks over at the confused blonde standing in her doorway. Ok, so she hasn’t told Aubrey that she’s going to Beca’s for Christmas. Something tells her that she would take offense to it, especially with Aubrey’s strong dislike for the freshman girl.

“Nope,” Chloe chirps, stuffing a pile of pajamas into the half empty suitcase.

Aubrey trails farther into the room, taking a seat on the edge of Chloe’s bed, “So where are you going then?”

Chloe swallows nervously, “Um, I’m going to Beca’s for Christmas.”

“Seriously?” there’s a serious sour bite to Aubrey’s tone, one that already has Chloe’s stomach churning, “You know you don’t have to go home with that scraggly little alt girl…you’re always welcome to come home with me.”

“I know, I thought it would be nice…and she offered,” Chloe mumbles, turning her attention back to her packing.

Chloe also hasn’t been very up front with Aubrey about how close her and Beca have become. She’s just tried to keep the peace this year with the way her best friend has been acting.

“Why the sudden change of heart?” Aubrey snaps, “You’ve said no to my offer for the last two years.”

Chloe just shrugs, because honestly, she’s not sure herself.

“Do you like her or something?”

Chloe knows that she’s just trying to figure it out, but she can’t help feeling like this is somewhat of an interrogation. She’s not sure how to respond to the question, so she stays silent, pursing her lips in a way that means ‘I’m done talking’.

Aubrey nods knowingly, her own little frown visible, “She’s with Jesse, you know that right? She’s straight Chloe.”

“You don’t know that for sure,” Chloe mumbles in defeat.

“I just don’t want to see you get hurt…ok?” Aubrey sighs.

“I won’t…I’m going as her friend and nothing more,” Chloe finally zips her very full suitcase up and stands from the floor.

Aubrey looks at her with softer eyes now, “Chlo, I know you. This is probably more harmful than it is helpful.”

“It’s just a stupid crush Bree, I can move past it,” Chloe doesn’t know why she’s defending herself so vehemently.

“Ok, I get it. Just be careful,” the blonde gives her a small smile before standing up and heading out of the room.

Maybe this is a mistake. Chloe knows what is happening. Every time she’s around Beca she feels herself falling just a little more. It’s a very slippery slope she’s on right now, one that ends up with a broken heart. Why is it that she can never help herself though?

************

Surprisingly, Beca talks off Chloe’s ear for a good majority of their flight to Seattle. Chloe had assumed she would put her headphones on and promptly fall asleep. Maybe she’s just as excited as Chloe is…although right now she’s more nervous than anything.

“So, tell me again who’s going to be there…so I don’t mess names up?” it’s probably the fifth time she’s asked it on this flight alone.

Beca chuckles, “Chlo, you don’t have to worry, I’ll introduce you when we get there.”

Chloe’s sparkling blue eyes bore into Beca’s, she hopes she’s getting the message across, “Beca just tell me.”

“Ok fine weirdo,” Beca scoots around so her left shoulder is against the seat and she’s facing Chloe, “my mom, Janette; my step-dad, Peter; and my two brothers, Lucas and Ethan. Lucas is my full brother, he’s 15. Ethan is my half-brother and he is 4. On Christmas day, my grandma and grandpa will be there, as well as my Aunt and Uncle and their families, but I’ll introduce them to you later.”

Chloe shuffles in her seat anxiously, “Ok cool, I’m excited to meet everyone.”

“You don’t have to freak Chlo, they’re super chill and they’re excited you’re coming,” Beca reads her emotions like an open book.

Chloe sighs looking up at the ceiling of the airplane, “You know, sometimes I feel so lost…I just feel like I don’t belong anywhere.”

“I’m sorry,” she can feel Beca’s eyes on her still, “but for what it’s worth, you have me. I know I’m not much, but it’s something, right?”

She knows it’s not how Beca means it, but the statement makes butterflies erupt inside her, “Hey don’t think you’re nothing, I’m so grateful I have you.”

Shortly after their conversation, Chloe falls asleep, her head resting gently against Beca’s shoulder. She finally wakes up to Beca shaking her, telling her they’ve landed in Denver for their connecting flight. They walk sleepily through the airport, and before Chloe knows it they’re back on a plane. They both settle in quickly and Chloe is asleep again, dreaming of a warm fire, mistletoe and Beca’s lips against hers…

************

When they step out of the airport in Seattle, Chloe’s eyes turn into saucers when she sees the white on the ground and the sparkling little flakes falling from the sky. Beca looks at her in amusement as she skips out into the snow, spinning around in a circle.

“Bec isn’t it pretty!” Chloe feels so carefree and happy in the moment, holding out her hand to catch a few flakes, which immediately melt against her skin.

Beca walks out past the overhang to join her, snowflakes immediately clinging to the fabric of her beanie and hair, her cheeks turning red in the chilly air. Chloe can’t help thinking that she looks beautiful.

“It’s alright I guess,” Beca smirks, “I can tell you’re from the south Beale.”

“Beca!” both girls immediately turn their attention to the voice.

A few feet away is a moderately sized blue SUV, a man who looks to be in his late forties stands next to it waving. It must be Peter, Beca’s step-dad. Both girls quickly grab their abandoned suitcases and walk over to the car. Peter looks like a genuine guy, someone that would give you the shirt off his back. He’s smiling at the two girls like he’s been waiting all month to see them.

“Hey Pete, how’s life?” Beca says casually and she throws her bag into the open and waiting trunk.

“Can’t complain, and this must be Chloe,” the man turns to look at Chloe, he’s grinning warmly, he’s got wrinkles by his eyes and a dark bushy beard.

“Yup,” Beca replies, making a popping noise on the “p” of the word.

“It’s nice to meet you!” Chloe chirps pleasantly.

“Nice to meet you too Chloe, I’ve heard a lot about you,” Peter motions to the back seat of the car, “why don’t you two sit in the back, I don’t mind being the driver,” he winks at the two.

Beca and Chloe quickly climb into the back seat of the car and they start down the road. Chloe watches the snow fall as they drive. They get on the highway; she can tell they are heading out of the city. She vaguely recalls Beca saying she lives in a smaller town just outside Seattle itself.

After about 30 minutes of driving, they are pulling up to a cozy looking two story house. Chloe would bet money on it being perfectly decorated on the inside, maybe it even smells like cinnamon or evergreen.

“Alright, here we are, home sweet home,” Pete gestures at the home as he parks the car in front of the garage.

As they step inside, Chloe’s suspicions are quickly proved correct. Off to the right of the entry way, she can see the living room, where a large tree is perfectly decorated. There is garland wrapped around the railing going upstairs and little signs and decorations everywhere…and it does smell like cinnamon.

“Come on, lets take our stuff upstairs before the ambush,” Beca nods her head to the stairs.

Chloe follows Beca closely up the stairs and down the hall. They walk to the end of the hall and Beca pushes open a door she assumes is her room. As they walk in, Chloe drinks in her surroundings carefully. The walls are covered in posters, most of them being about music. There are fairy lights hanging around the top of the ceiling. In the corner there is a fancy looking computer set up. The first thing Beca does is open up her bags containing her music equipment, which she promptly hooks up to the computer.

Chloe gingerly sets her bag down in the corner and takes a seat on the edge of the double bed in the middle of the room.

After Beca has successfully plugged in her equipment she turns around to look at Chloe, almost apologetically, “So, there isn’t really anywhere else for you to sleep but in here…I hope that’s ok. You can share the bed with me or I can get the air mattress down from the attic.”

Chloe tingles with excitement thinking about sleeping next to the brunette, “Oh that’s totes ok. I don’t mind sharing with you, the mattress would probably take up a lot of space in here anyways.”

“Awesome,” Beca looks relieved that Chloe is ok with the sleeping arrangements.

After both girls get settled, they head back downstairs. Unsurprisingly, her entire family is waiting in the living room when they enter. Her mom lights up at the sight of Beca, her brother Lucas gives Chloe a weird look. Little four-year-old Ethan looks like he could care less.

“Beca!” her mom stands up and throws her arms around her eldest child.

Beca grumbles and doesn’t even attempt to wrap her arms around her mom, “You’re squeezing the life out of me.”

“Oh don’t be dramatic,” her mom chuckles, pulling away to look over at Chloe.

“And you must be Chloe,” her mom walks over and promptly pulls Chloe into a hug.

After she recovers from the shock, she does hug back.

“I’m so glad you could come,” her mom pulls away from the hug, she says it so genuinely that Chloe truly believes she’s excited that a strange girl has invaded their family holiday, “Lucas, come say hi to your sister and Chloe.”

Lucas stands up slowly, very much fitting the angsty teenager profile. He looks so much like Beca that Chloe swears they could be twins if it wasn’t for the four-year age difference.

“Sup Bec,” he nods at his sister, then raises his eyebrow at Chloe, “so are you my sister’s girlfriend?”

If Chloe has been eating or drinking anything it would be sprayed all over the fifteen-year-old. Beca emits a quiet squeaking noise, the tips of her ears turning red.

“Lucas, you know Beca is dating Jesse, remember we told you?” Beca’s mom steps in before either of the two have to answer.

“Oh yea, I forgot about that,” Lucas stalks back to his spot on the sofa, sliding his earbuds back in his ears as he goes.

They talk to Beca’s family for a little bit, but Chloe is barely focused enough to answer their questions. Most of the time she ends up needing them to repeat themselves. She plays it off as jet lag. Truthfully, her mind is spinning with the probability that Beca is not as straight as her or Aubrey thought. Her brother wouldn’t have asked about a girlfriend if she was completely straight.

************

Beca looks nervous as she shuts the door behind them. Chloe sits down on the bed and watches as Beca paces back and forth a few times before settling down next to the red head. Beca had seemed a little anxious all night, so Chloe was glad when it was late enough for them to head upstairs for bed.

“So after all that I have a little bit of explaining to do,” Beca plays with her hands that are sitting her lap, “you know how my brother asked if you were my girlfriend?”

Chloe nods anxiously, trying to cover up how excited she really is.

“Just to clarify, I dated girls in high school…he was so used to seeing me with girls, he just assumed I guess…I’m bi,” Beca stammers nervously.

Chloe nods knowingly, “I kind of assumed so after he said that.”

“You’re not weirded out…like weird about sleeping in the same bed as me, are you?” Beca looks genuinely concerned and it almost breaks her heart.

She shakes her head stiffly, “Of course not. Beca…you aren’t a predator, you just like girls. You aren’t going to feel me up in my sleep…unless you wanted to of course,” she throws the brunette a wink, successfully turning her face red.

“Ok good,” Beca rubs the back of her neck, “I just dealt with a lot of judgement from the girls in high school, I forget that most people are pretty chill.”

“I would never judge you Bec, it would be pretty damn hypocritical,” Chloe flashes her a soft, comforting smile, “I’m not as straight as you think.”

“Really?” Beca looks genuinely surprised at the admission.

“I’ve never officially dated a girl, but I’ve thought about it…I’ve fooled around with girls,” Chloe isn’t afraid to admit the fact, she never has been.

The information seems to floor Beca a little, only a high pitched, “Oh, ok,” manages to escape.

“Thank you for sharing with me Bec,” Chloe reaches her hand out to lay it softly over Beca’s, “thank you again for all of this, for inviting me here.”

“Anytime Chlo,” it looks like she’s going to say more but instead yawns loudly.

Chloe is yawning right after her and she suddenly realizes how heavy her limbs feel, and how soft the bed beneath her is, “Maybe we should get some sleep, it was a long day.”

Beca nods in agreement, “I’m all for that.”

************

Chloe wakes up earlier than she’d like the next morning. The sun is barely peaking through the blinds and Beca is softly snoring next to her. Her eyelids are heavy, like she could fall back asleep if she wanted, but something…well more someone, prevents her from doing so.

Beca ended up turning around in her sleep, so her face is lined up with Chloe’s. She slid impossibly close to her bedmate, not on purpose, but Chloe can practically feel her warm breath on her face. The proximity of the younger girl makes Chloe’s heart hammer in her chest. Her hair is practically on top of her head, wild from sleep, Chloe thinks it’s adorable. She takes the time to study Beca’s face, she ends up staring at the soft lines and plumpness of her lips, wishing she could lean forward and softly peck them.

Maybe Aubrey was right…maybe this trip is more harm than it is good. She does know that Beca isn’t straight now, but that doesn’t change the fact that she’s still with Jesse. Chloe has to respect that, as much as she’d like to shoot her shot with the freshman girl.

She’s not sure how long she watches Beca, but the sun is finally pouring through the cracks of the blinds when Beca finally starts stirring. Chloe snaps her eyes shut, not wanting to get caught staring. She hears Beca groan and feels the bed shift next to her, so she slowly lets her eyes flutter back open.

“Mm, good morning,” Beca yawns sleepily when Chloe’s eyes are completely open.

“Morning,” Chloe replies, her voice still surprisingly gravely from sleep.

“You sleep ok?” Beca asks as she rolls onto her back.

Chloe slowly sits up, the warm cocoon of blankets falling down past her torso, “Yea, definitely, how about you?”

Beca stretches lazily, her legs popping out from under the covers and her arms raising above her head, “Slept great. I’m ready for a day of fun!”

“You have something good planned?” Chloe asks excitedly.

“Well, since it snowed quite a bit yesterday…I thought we could go sledding, then maybe head into the city for a while?” Beca asks, more then tells, clearly wanting Chloe to be on board with her plans.

“Sounds great Bec,” Chloe is already beaming thinking about sledding, she’s only ever done it once before and she barely remembers.

“Cool,” Beca smiles right back at her.

If Chloe’s being honest, she doesn’t care what they do, as long as it’s with Beca. Shit, she really is screwed…

#bechloe fanfic #pp fanfic #bechloe #my stuff

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quietlyimplode · 4 years ago

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Whumptober2020 - Day 15 - Into the Unknown.

Day 1 - Waking Up Restrained // Day 2 - Kidnapped // Day 3 - Manhandled // Day 4 - Caged// Day 5 - Rescue // Day 6 - No More // Day 7 - Support // Day 8 - Isolation // Day 9 - Take Me Instead // Day 10 - Blood Loss/Trail of Blood // Day 11 - Psych 101 // Day 12 - Broken Down // Day 13 - Oxygen Mask // Day 14 - Alternative Prompt - Comfort // Day 15 - Into The Unknown

Natasha’s POV on therapy, and her first therapy session.

Therapy not a foreign concept, having received it before in the early stages of her journey into Shield but the unknowns of voluntarily going, is making her wary. It’s weaknesses that she can’t abide by.

If her handlers saw her now, she’s be six feet under or in prisoned for re-education; mind wiped, start again. Sometimes it’s a consideration and feels almost preferable to working through what she has to.

——-

Clint convinces her to go. After finding her passed out in a bolt hole in Alphabet city, bleeding all over her sheets and having visions of her team mates telling her, her worst fears, her worst imaginations, he’s not wrong in saying that something has to give. Cognitively, she knows this.

The whole day she’s on edge. Avoiding Clint. Screw him. This is his fault.

She can work through her own damn triggers.

Clint’s found his old therapist, Tony’s hired her.

She’s coming to the tower at 4.

Natasha spends the whole morning in the gym, ribs be damned, bruising and cuts make the session more painful but almost cathartic to work on. She can only hide in here so long.

She goes to her room and tries to read.

Heads to the kitchen. Sees Steve talking with Clint. Leaves.

Heads back to the gym. Maybe a run will help.

Clint and Steve find her in the Gym, panting her way through her third mile. Clint has the concerned look on his face, one of ‘what happened’ and ‘how can I help?’. She gets off the treadmill, pushes past both of them and leaves. Goes back to her room and showers.

Restlessly, she tries to read again. Stuffs around on her phone, looks at the time. Tony did say four right?

She heads down to check with him, the only one she can stand being around, the only one who’s not hovering, walking on eggshells and being a general pain in the ass.

She opts for a different tact when she gets there.

“How does this work?”

Tony looks up, surprised.

“What do you mean?” Natasha takes a deep breath. She hates this so much.

“I mean how does this work? I need…” she takes a pause and thinks what she’s actually asking; “a therapist and you just happen to get one that Clint knows and trusts, that will come to the tower? What did you do?”

Tony side eyes her, “I made some calls, paid some salaries. It’ll be fine.” He smiles, Natasha stops listening, waits til he finishes talking, rolls her eyes and stalks out. Stays just outside the room remembers why she went to Tony in the first place, walks back in again and waits til he turns around.

“God you’re like a ninja.”

“You just don’t pay attention.” She snaps.

“My hyper vigilance works differently to yours.” He retorts.

She pauses.

“When does she get here?”

“I don’t know, Nat, soon? I said 4, so I assume she’ll be here at 4.” She glances at the clock 3.50. Feels her breathing quicken, chest heavy. Nerves are now at an all time high. Leaving quickly she heads for the only space with air, the roof.

Clint’s already up there, she turns to leave but he spots her, “Nat, wait.” He calls.

She’s having difficulty getting her breath under control, feels more of a heaving, she needs to sit, buckles first.

Clint's running over and she holds up a hand. A warning, don’t talk; don’t touch.

She gets back to her feet. Looks at him in the eyes, the fucking eyes of worry. Makes a decision then and there.

“I’m not going.” She says.

“Tasha..”

“No. You don’t get to decide this for me. I went with it, saw some merit in it; but you know as well as I do; this is not how we work on things. This is not how we work through things. Send me on another mission, get back on the horse, who cares? So I have another trigger - who on this team doesn’t? Bruce is triggered by being fucking angry, and he doesn’t have to go? Why should I?”

He lets her finish her tirade.

“You promised.” He says in Russian for emphasis.

“I’m not going.” She replies in kind.

Staring at each other they’re interrupted by Tony swaggering towards them.

“Nat?” He calls out.

“She’s here.” Clint says.

Natasha is pissed. Traitor.

“I’m not going.” She informs Tony.

“Nat,” Clint tries.

Tony doesn’t even pause before heading into a lecture, it makes Natasha think that he’s been thinking about it all day.

“Natasha, the Doctor is waiting, you agreed. Give it ten minutes - five even, if you don’t like what she’s got to say you can leave.”

Clint's nodding.

Natasha scowls. Pissed that this all feels so targeted.

“Come on. If you don’t go, you have to hang out with me and Clint. And you know the whole time, we’re all going to be thinking that you should have just ripped the bandaid off and gone. Plus, if not today; then I’ll ask her to come back tomorrow; or the next day; or the one after. You get me? We aren’t letting this go. You need someone, that’s not; well, us.”

Well fuck.

She doesn’t want to be around them. She doesn’t want to be around anybody now. She feels like she’s them down already and feels betrayed. They’re supposed to have her back.

And then.

What if it doesn’t work, and she’s beyond saving? What if she lets them down?

She watches as Clint walks towards the door, holds it open.

“Come on.” He says, “put on an alarm and suck it up.”

She shoots Clint a look that she hopes conveys, fuck you and the high horse you rolled in on, and rolls her eyes. Follows Clint through the door. Tony is behind them. She counts her steps trying to alleviate panic.

They all but frog-march her to the office. Stand next to her.

All the feelings in the world are telling her to run. Leave. Never come back. Screw them; she doesn’t need them.

But.

She promised.

Taking the step inside she’s met with the kindly looking therapist that Clint told her about.

“Hello,” the woman says.

“Hello,” says Natasha.

The woman introduces herself, explains a bit on how she works. Natasha meets her with silence.

She is standing in front of the door, shakes her head when the therapist offers her a seat.

“So, do you have any questions?”

Can I leave? She thinks.

“What happens now.. Today?” She clarifies.

“Usually I’d ask why you’re here but your bandages and bruises tell me stories I feel you’re not ready to tell yet. So maybe we’ll start with strategies.” She pauses. Thinks.

“What do you know of grounding?”

“Some.” They’ve used it before, techniques that help pull you from flashbacks. Works but often hit and miss.

“Grounding helps us when we are experiencing big emotions, when reality doesn’t feel real or you just can’t get that breath under control. It helps us refocus on what’s happening in the present moment. You can use grounding techniques to help create space from distressing feelings in nearly any situation.” She pauses. “We’re going to be more targeted in our use of these. I get the feeling that you’re a woman of few words. How do you feel about just answering me with single words?”

Natasha feels positive about it.

Nods.

The therapist continues. “Ok, great. If you were to use a technique would it be mental, physical or soothing? Before you answer, a mental technique might be doubling numbers or thinking in categories, a physical technique might be putting your hands in water or a smell or touching something nearby; lastly the soothing techniques are those like teaching yourself to use words of affirmation or listing your favourite things or planning an activity.”

Natasha thinks.

Definitely not the last one. Likes the idea of mental games but physical is the one she lands on. Tactile prompt is what she’s always used, it’s harder to fake and doesn’t rely on her brain to function, easier for those around her to help her tune into. Doesn’t say this out loud. Replies.

“Physical.”

The therapist smiles. “Ok, great. So I’m going to suggest some ideas; maybe tell me one that you think might work for you, or that you’d feel comfortable letting someone know what to do when a flashback comes or your body or brain doesn’t feel like your own. Is this making sense?”

Natasha nods again.

“Ok, so hands in water noticing the change in temperature and the flow, or touching or picking up something around you, using your breath - breathing deeply, holding a piece of ice, a scent - like perfume or something that’s familiar, maybe moving your body, or listening to what’s going on around you, feeling your body, and then there’s the 5/4/3/2/1 method of 5 things you see, 4 things you touch and so on.”

She pauses. Waits. Expects a response.

Natasha looks at her feet, realises she’s still standing. Wants to sit. Pulls the chair out so the back is against the wall and curls inside.

“Hearing and touch.” She says. “harder to fake.” She elaborates.

The therapist nods.

“Ok, good. Good to know. Hearing is easy but sometimes needs another to tune us into it. Is there someone that can help you with that? That you’d feel comfortable with disclosing this?”

Natasha nods. Thinks of Clint. Knows instinctively that all she’s learnt from him, he’s learnt from this woman.

“Ok, if they’re not around then I want you try and acknowledge when you’re on the cusp of panic - put on music you know, like, know the words or tune to. Can you think of anything that would fit this?”

Natasha nods again.

“Ok; touch. Do you have any issue with people touching you, when you’re in panicked states?” Feels personal. But not wrong. Natasha looks up, sharply. Makes eye contact.

“Then this is going to be a bit different, prompt your body to tune into whatever it’s touching, sitting on, holding; take note of the temperature , the colour - anything you can think of. Does that make sense?”

“Yes.” Natasha says.

“Ok. So here, if you’re ever feeling or looking unsafe here I’m going to prompt you. Like practice, right? I might say something like the air conditioning is on or that I am talking to you. What I will also tell you is that sometimes you need to let the thoughts come.”

Pauses. Continues.

“Have you ever stopped trying to think about something and the more you try to stop it, the more the thought becomes repetitive til you can’t stop thinking about it? I’m going to remind you to let the thoughts come; but let them go too. Let it flow through you. Lastly I might tell you you’re safe. But as safety is a concept of the mind I might not always tell you that. What I’ll say now is that your words, your thoughts are safe here in the room, with me. So if you ever feel like talking through something that’s happened or going to happen or anything from the past, this is somewhere where you can do that. I’ll let you know that Mr. Stark has placed me on retainer so you call I come, easy right?”

Natasha rolls her eyes and the therapist gives her an easy smile.

“So, here’s where I tell you let’s give this a try. If it works it works, if it doesn’t that’s ok too, we just try something different. Just remember when you’re working through it, and things are ok keep working. If you feel yourself struggle - take a break. If you’re having a tough time; frustrated or overwhelmed with yourself, remove yourself from the situation. Our goal is to protect yourself and stay safe,” she smiles.

Natasha gets up.

“Natasha, would you like us to touch base daily or every second day?

Ahh the illusion of choice. The therapist is lucky that she seems competent, Natasha knows why Clint had referred her, the intelligence in her words and being able to read her is skilful.

“Second day,” she responds. What the hell, Tony’s right, what has she got to lose?

She side steps to the door, but the therapist isn’t finished yet,

“Last thing, do you have any questions?” Huh.

She doesn’t think so.. Hand on the doorknob she shakes her head.

“Ok, thanks for coming today. It’s lovely to meet you.” Natasha turns to acknowledge the woman. Gives a small smile

——-

#whumptober2020 #day 15 #into the unknown #clintasha #natasha romanoff #black widow #clint barton #tony stark #hawkeye #marvel fic #natasha goes to therapy #long fic #yay halfway

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faulty-writes · 5 years ago

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Hello! I love your blog aaaaa,,, all fics are. so. good. I was wondering, can I request an scenario of Tokoyami and Amajiki (separately) with a crush who has a quirk that hurts her when she uses it and it leaves scars, especially in her back? And the bois (?) hurt her in a spar, but she says its ok, that it doesnt hurt that much because shes used to the pain? I know this is such a weird request, sorry askdj

[Rquests: OPEN.]

[I’m going to go ahead and say this I LOVE MY BOY TAMAKI <3 I always role play as him whenever I get the chance, thank God I have my own role play server. But he’s my cute little anxiety boy and I adore Tokoyami as well <3 That being said. I hope you enjoy!]

Everything under the cut!

Tokoyami Fumikage

Tokoyami was someone who took everything seriously, there was no room to fool around when it came to being a hero and he dedicated most of his time to just that, his hero work. Of course, he was no stranger to asking for help as well as helping others. Which is why when you asked him to spar with you, he agreed. Both to help you and to be able to spend time with you which he found himself desperately wanting.

Though much like him, you had a quirk that leaned more towards the dark side. But unlike most, you often experienced physical pain when you used your quirk. At first, you assumed it was due to the dark nature of it, but then you began to notice it left behind scars that pulsed with pain. Over the years you had gotten used to it however and it was rare that any form of pain bothered you.

Which was part of the reason you tended to do good when it came to close combat and Tokoyami was more than a worthy opponent. You had managed to land a few hits on him but he eventually got the upper hands thanks to Dark Shadow and you ended up flying across the training field. Involatraily crying out when you hit the ground and your body bounced against it before rolling to a stop.

You were covered in dirt and bleeding cuts and scrapes. Your clothes had rips in them and the shoulder that took the brunt of the impact coursed with pain. One of your legs was shaking as you stood back on your feet, reaching up to brush a piece of your hair out of your face. “Y/n!” Tokoyami called as he ran up to you, a fearful expression on his face as well as Dark Shadow’s. “Are you okay!? I didn’t mean to hit you that hard!” Shadow spoke before Tokoyami nodded.

“Yes, please forgive me. I stepped out of line, are you okay?” he asked and you shrugged in response. Despite your condition, “I’m used to pain, so it doesn’t hurt. You don’t have to worry about me that much.” you replied and watched as Tokoyami narrowed his eyes and Dark Shadow looked at you with concern. “What do you mean used to pain?! That doesn’t sound good.” Tokoyami nodded in agreement with his quirk.

“I agree and I’m afraid I can’t help but be concerned,” he said as he approached you and laid his hand on your shoulder. “You are a dear friend and I ...very much like you. I want you to be okay and well,” he said before you shrugged his hand away. “I said I’m used to it, it’s fine.” Tokoyami shook his head. “I disagree, I have noticed the number of scars you have, tell me. Is it because of your quirk?” he knew he was overstepping his boundaries but he needed to ask regardless.

You froze up and looked away, damn it. He noticed. You sighed. “Yeah, it hurts when I use my quirk,” you confessed in a whisper “and it leaves behind scars.” it was then that Tokoyami did something you would have never expected, he stepped close and pulled you in for a hug. Despite how much it made his heart race to be able to be so close to you, “I understand,” he said and Dark Shadow nodded. “Yeah! You can’t hide much from us! I’m too observant!” he said pointing at himself but Tokoyami gave him a warning glare.

“Perhaps I can help you learn how to use your quirk in a way that does not hurt you.” he suggested before dropping his arms, “For now, I only request one thing.” he began, looking at you with a serious expression. “Please, whenever you use your quirk. Whenever you are injured come to me, I am no stranger to scars and I promise I will not judge. I only wish to patch you up, help you.” he said, after all, he had feelings for you and his only wish was for you to be happy.

Despite feeling a little embarrassed knowing that he cared that much about you, somehow you found yourself nodding in agreement. “Okay.” you said, “Thank you Tokoyami, I ...I would appreciate that” you added and he nodded. “You’re quite welcome, perhaps we should switch to physical combat as opposed to using our quirks.” you looked surprised at his suggestion but once more agreed with him.

“Just be gentle with me.” you teased and he nodded, despite feeling terrified and guilty for what he had done. For how he had unintentionally hurt the one he cared about the most. He would find a way to help you use your quirk and he would capture your heart in the process. At least that’s what he promised himself.

Tamaki Amajiki

Tamaki Amajiki was a shy man, anxiety issues were his life and he didn’t tend to venture outside his own circle of friends. That was until he noticed his feelings for you and he couldn’t even describe the number of butterflies he felt whenever you were around him, just praying that you would talk to him. He had gotten his exact wish when you asked him if he would be willing to train with you.

Originally you were supposed to train with your friend, but their plans changed last minute and they had to cancel on you. That’s when someone suggested you ask a member of the Big Three and Tamaki stood out in your mind. Though it took him forever to answer your question as his cheeks were bright red and his eyes were focused more on the floor than you. But eventually, he did respond with an “O-Okay ...I-I’d love t-to.” and that led to you two out on the training grounds.

At first, he was going easy on you, both because you were a girl and you happened to be the person he had a crush on. You quickly caught onto this and told him not to be afraid, to use his quirk and defend himself like he normally would against anyone. But you found he might have taken your advice too seriously and you were quickly reminded just how powerful he was. Those tentacles of his were hard to dodge, but it was his vines that eventually got you.

You felt the way they stung as they hit your back and ripped your shirt up leaving you to stumble forward and land face-first into the dirt. You groaned and pushed yourself up, Tamaki’s gasp filled the air. “Y/n?” he said hesitantly and though you didn’t see it, he was visibly shaking as he approached you. His eyes full of concern as he held his hand out, immediately feeling guilt as he looked at your back. He took notice of those scars that were embedded in your skin and he trembled.

“D-Did I do t-that?!” he asked in a panic and you looked confused a moment before turning around to face him. “Do what?” you questioned, though Tamaki just bowed his head. Hands covering his face. “I-I’m so s-sorry! Y/n! I d-didn’t mean to h-hurt you that b-bad!” how could he do that to someone he liked? He got too carried away, damn. What was he thinking? God, he knew this was a bad idea.

“Tamaki …” you said as you reached over to grab his hands, but he tried to keep them pressed to his face. “You didn’t do anything …” he shook his head, finally dropping his hands and looked at you. His eyes had tears in them, “Y-Yes I did! I ...t-those s-scars you h-have ...d-did I d-do that? E-Even if I d-didn’t um, I s-still hurt you. A-Are you o-okay?” your eyes widened for a moment before you glanced to the side, so he had noticed your scars.

You bit your lip a moment as you tried to think of how to respond, “I ...I’m fine Tamaki, r-really. I ...I’m used to pain, it’s a normal occurrence with my quirk.” you explained and though you couldn’t tell, Tamaki's heart sank in his chest. “W-Wait ...d-do you mean t-those scars are from …” he hesitated and you finished his sentence, “My quirk, yes,” you said and he sniffled.

“Y/n, I ...I-I’m sorry I didn’t k-know! P-Please, don’t u-use your quirk if it h-hurts you! I d-don’t like s-seeing you hurt.” he hated seeing anyone he cared about in pain but especially you. “Tamaki ...I said I’m used to it. You didn’t do anything wrong.” you tried to reason with him again and he shook his head.

“C-Can I ...c-can I ...at l-least hug you?” he questioned shyly, his cheeks were bright red and he was trembling but even so, his question was a surprise. “Y-You want to hug me?” you repeated and he shyly nodded. “P-Please, e-even though you s-say you a-are okay, I d-don’t like t-the idea of you b-being used to p-pain ...I um, t-thought maybe a h-hug would help,” he said, his arms still outstretched and you hesitantly leaned forward.

You felt safe as soon as his arms wrapped around you and you leaned your head against his shoulder. “I-I’m sorry your q-quirk hurts you a-and that I h-hurt you. B-But now I ...I d-don’t want to s-stop hugging y-you until y-you’re better.” he said, hoping you didn’t feel how fast his heart was racing. “Tamaki, you really don’t have to do that,” you replied, your head still pressing against his shoulder.

“I w-want to, i-if I can h-help in a-any way I w-will. I c-consider you m-my most special p-person, the o-one that I ...I ...w-well I ...r-really like y-you y/n and um ...w-well I p-promise I’ll m-make all t-that pain g-go away.” your eyes widened at his confession and you felt a blush of your own come to your cheeks. “I ...I don’t know what to say Tamaki.” you felt his arms tighten around you.

“You d-don’t have to s-say anything, j-just let me h-hold you,” he whispered, and though you didn’t know how long he planned to hold you. Somehow you found yourself relaxing against him, a sort of warmth coming to you knowing that he cared so much about your pain.

#Anonymous #tamaki x reader #tamaki amajiki x reader #tokoyami x reader #fumikage x reader #bnha reader insert #bnha requests

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crowstan · 4 years ago

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reacting to my favorite dad n gang: #3

Howdy do, back with part 3! there was a significant delay for reasons, but I am back and that’s what matters. Spoilers for Taking on ANXIETY with Lilly Singh!! | Sanders Sides

-Ok, I haven't started but. Mood. The title is a mood. I will not elaborate.

-Ah jeez, a beeped cuss! How adultery! /j

-I’m ok with cussing

-SNK-

-IT WAS FORK DJHDKJHSKHDIU

-THAT’S the kind of humor I like!

-Intro is still as groovy as ever, which is uh. Idk. I write bad takes I don’t have an opinion on this

-JHFDKJFHSLJFHEKWSF MOOD

-IT DO BE LIKE THAT SOMETIMES

-!! a! all black!! and an excessive amount of eye shadow!! THIS is a Perfect Boy!! /hj

-In al serious I do be looking like that which further concludes that me and Virgil have the same taste in clothes and he is a cis version of me that got released into the local hot topic

-Or an older, more dysphoric me released into a hot topic. They are very similar but one would be seen more often in a hoodie when it isn’t Sweater Weather time. Or I like to think they would be similar at least.

-aaa!! a lil sas!! mood tho lmaoo

-”Sup?” jkfhajhfdsalkdj ok but I do that

-This is just me finding Virgil relatable by the Things I keep picking up lmaoo

-jkashfdkfjshf my literal thought process after doing one thing.

-”yo” he’s. so chill. i wanna be that cool! /hj

-”Hey there princey” wejfhjakfhsdjfhjsdkfhskd same vibes as two friends “flirting” and also acting like they hate each other. except rn they aren’t friends and they maybe do hate each other. anyway, kismessitude vibes kinda??

-I speak romance only in homestuck terms, and if i hear someone say that moirails are platonic one more time or that kismessitudes are unhealthy or ignore auspitism, i will scream

-akhdafjsd that chuckle??? That Gave Me Serotonin. I Can Finally Sleep At Night Without The Thing Watching Me. I Am Fully At Peace.

-ok that was a half joke but?? legit made me a lil happy man. people laughing or chuckling just?? I wanna join them in the Happy Noise regardless of my Happy Status

-AA!! Superwoman!! i like watching her!!

-Ajdskhfsf man i wish my blood pumped, then maybe my hands n feet wouldn’t be cold. but no I get the chest pains and sickness :/

-/j

-O shit I could use this advice!! like legit!! notes time shIT W H E R E ‘ S M Y P A P E R -

-hj, these are good tho n I will try them

-positive self talk?? oh, uh, I draw the line at that, pal /hj

-best to skip over that aha--

-hey!! i have that same pillow pet!! I named my cobb! like corn on the cob!

-”focus on the now” jaskhfjaksfhjkds jeez I thought this was a list of stuff you could reasonably do, not the impossible /j

-ye s she pointed out it may not work for everyone bc everyone’s different!! Nice!!

-I absolutely love it when ppl do that tbh. It’s like the creator is saying “tis ok, you’ll work through it eventually”

-”Ya nasty” jkafhkdahksa me @ my friends, but in a loving way

-”Accept that you have anxiety” JHDLKAFH THE FIRST STEP TO SOLVING A PROBLEM IS ACKNOWLEDGING AND ADMITTING YOU HAVE A PROBLEM!!!

-or ah. the quote was smtn like that at least! I got the vibes down

-”(growls)” jashfkjas mood

-hehe a spook!! there was a spook!! heehee!!

-aa a I accidentally looked at his eyes at the exact moment he winked. I am Dead Now bc eye contact is a Fighting Sign /hj

-hakgfdshak my dad came out here n tossed my hoodie over my head, ungroovy dude :/

-skdfhd m c r ??shit man I legit like a few of their songs-

Overall, a good video!! Had a little bit of stuff I’m gonna try out because, free tips, ya know? I absolutely digged Virgil’s design bc it’s a mood and ideal and I wanna look like that! Transition goals even, if I may. Anyway 10/10, had little plot but made up for it with characters, character design, and learnability.

#sanders sides #ts spoilers #ts spoiler #sanders sides virgil #sanders sides roman #uhh i do not think there are any more tags I can add tbh #the specific reasons was supervising my kid while they were cooking spaghetti noodles #apparently they set them on fire a lot?#no fires happened today tho so I'd say it went well #they are now the most competent child when it comes to cooking #the others have not learned yet #that's why i'm their dad #their families never taught them to cook anything and they're goblins #I say that with love #we're all goblins

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monochromemedic · 4 years ago

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“Get the hell away from me you freak-” the man’s exclamation was cut short as a wet force shot into his legs, his body slamming against the pavement with a loud thud. A direct slime bullet shot, and the last of the gang was contained within their gooey prisons. I sighed in relief, lowering my arm. ‘I should quip, that’s what all the good heroes do right?’ “You kiss your mother with that mouth?” I said softly before realizing that no one, not even the gathering crowd could hear that. “You kiss your mother with that mouth?!” I repeated before realizing how weak that was. Baby steps... just needed to not show my face around here for a week so they’d all forget how much I fucked up. I rubbed my neck, fingers gliding along the cryo collar as it released a blast of cold air, waves of relief flooding my body. The crowd erupted in clapping, something that startled me back to the situation at hand. A small rising gang had been causing havoc over the city, something larger heroes would only keep their eyes on before attempting to resolve. They were there to help with big tasks, real villains or aliens, something that would cause real devastation. It made sense but that didn’t mean that some real low lives could sneak under the radar and cause some damage as long as they spaced what they were doing enough or kept it the damage to a minimum. The Graveyard Gang was playing with that line and it was obvious that if it wasn’t stopped some hero would have to come down and take them out themselves. If not for me. I raised a hand sheepishly, waddling to the side of the street to meet the crowd that formed around me. “Hey... hello. Did someone call the police already? Is everyone ok?” My words were met by the sound of sirens drawing near, a large news van trailing not too far behind. A frantic woman nearly rolled out of the van, mic at the ready as she bolted through the crowd, ushering a small man lugging a camera to follow her. “Hi, hello, out of the way, Channel 9 news. Hi, I’m Sandra Stevens of Channel 9 news would you mind giving an interview about the heroic deed you just committed?” Her words were fast and rehearsed, like she had either done this a million times or dreamt about doing it so much, the words burned into her brain. Her mic was pushed into my face, knocking against my chin and drawing a thin strand of goo onto the mic. The woman didn’t seem to notice however, her eyes laser focused on me. “I... I su-sure. I’m just not very good on camera-” “Don’t worry honey, editors make everyone look good. Cameron! Start rolling, everyone please clear the place we need a nice shot of...what do you call yourself, Miss?” “G...Grey Matter.” “Grey.” she repeated, a eyebrow raised in silent judgement. “Well Grey Matter, hope you’re ready for your 5 minutes of fame because we’re rolling.” --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My fingers ran across the laptop keys, restarting the video again for the 11th time in a row. I couldn’t stop, my first interview, my first well known appearance as a hero. And the interview was... terrible. The comments didn’t say that but I couldn’t help but notice how nervous I looked, how much I stared into the camera at times, the way I showed my powers and how one guy said it was like a bad hentai. I knew that but god when others said that made everything feel ten times worse. However other commenters were nice, saying how cool I looked, how good it was to see another hero on the streets, taking care of baddies that the others didn’t get. I felt like my ego was a metronome switching from feeling like a god to feeling like a dumbass. I readied my finger to press the replay button as the video neared the end when a knock came to my door. Strange, I didn’t expect anyone, and not many people knew where I lived. Maybe it was a neighbor coming to congratulate me? Not like I could easily disguise myself and not many other people had the consistency of tar. I slid my pants on and walked to the door, opening it to a face almost 3 inches away from mine. “Hello-” I jumped back, arms raising and balling like huge slings, ready to attack only for them to deflate and fall to my waist as I realized who it was. “You really do stretch! It’s like you’re one big sticky hand toy. Neat, Neat...” Plastic Man commented, his neck extended to look at me further. “Mind if I come in? I’d like to talk.” “I... Y-yes of course Mr... Mr. Plastic Man I... Um.” I could feel myself beginning to melt as I went to close the door behind him, gesturing to my messy house before him. He towered over everything easily, walking past my fridge and ducking to get into my living room to observe more of the house, making eye contact with the laptop. He smiled widely to himself before shifting his eyes back at me. “Please, Mr. Plastic Man was my father, just call me Plas. And I assume you know about me from the way your fangirling?” “I... yes of course you’re an inspiration to me ever since I became like this. The way you quickly maneuver and creatively problem solve with an air of ease is inspiring. Not to mention the way your so cheerful with the public, it puts alot of people at ease, I...starting researching you because we have such similar powers.. not in a weird way just, how you do things.” I rambled trying to literally hold myself together as I felt my body begin to dribble to the floor. “I’m sorry can you excuse me-” “Go ahead, you need... help there?” He asked as I sped past him to my room, grabbing the collar and placing it around my neck. In an instant it came to life, a release of cold air wafting over my body. I returned to the living room, head craning to look at the tall hero. “No thank you, I’m alright. Sometimes when I get nervous or overheated I start to lose my form. The cold from the collar helps me keep me together.” He lowered his head, neck stretching once again to look closer at the device. “I get that, hell sometimes on summer days I gotta put myself in a freezer and become a Plas Pop or else I nearly melt down the storm drain. That’s just another thing we have in common I guess. And that’s what I came here to talk to you about.” I swallowed hard, his hand gesturing to the opened interview on the laptop. “Everyone’s been talking about the girl who took down the Graveyard Gang and word gets around fast. So fast that even I got word of it almost as soon as it aired. Boy was I surprised when I saw you on camera, showing of a little of what you could do. Another stretcher like me! And one who’s new to the game, a fresh face. It got me thinking.” He paused, crossing his arms as he glanced towards the ground. “Things have been quite in the League, least for ol’ Plas. Much as I love my job and helping the universe, seems like I’m always backup number 54 on the list of who to call when the world’s gonna end. Which isn’t bad but it leaves a guy with alot of time on his rubber hands. So I was thinking maybe I should give the whole mentor thing a shot, take someone under my wing. Just haven’t got the chance to meet someone I could actually teach anything to, till I saw your little stunt. So what do you say? Willing to make what the Batman described as ‘A horrible decision that no one would agree to’?” This was crazy. A proposal like this? And so soon? Learning under one of the League, one of the bests? “Yes, I’d be honored to be mentored by you Plastic Man- er... P-plas. I hope I don’t disappoint you, um... you know I can’t shapeshift like you right. I can’t turn into lions or trucks... I... I can’t do alot of those things actually, just basic stretching and modifications.” “Hm? Oh well that’s ok, besides I didn’t expect you to be exactly like me, that’d just be crazy thoughts. Also that’d make you my son, and that’s just weird. You got something else that I don’t have, you got that goo shot. I can’t shoot bullets of myself at people and you said you can set up traps and knock people out in a hail of slime. That’s kick ass, we just gotta embrace that side of you and you’ll be up there with Superman at the table, talking about what multiverse crisis was your favorite.” He grinned, lowering himself to my level and wrapping an arm around my shoulder, pulling me close against his body. I felt my face grow warm as I looked away from him, my chest pounding despite the lack of heart in my breast. Now he was touching me? Telling me how cool I was? I felt myself begin to drip again, knees beginning to buckle. “Y-you really think so?” “I know so. You got spunk kid, we just gotta polish you up and you’ll be golden, Pony Boy.” The force of his palm hitting my back sent me jolting forward, his shadow looming over me. “How about you meet me outside of your place, tomorrow. 1pm. We’ll assess your abilities and work from there. Sound good? Too bad, crime never waits. I’ll see you there.” And with surprising grace he dipped out of my apartment, leaving me like it was just a frantic dream. If it wasn’t for the sting from his palm I’d assume I was merely daydreaming, but it was real. Plastic Man and me, working together. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- “Come on, haven’t you ever seen Spider-Man. Leap of faith!” “I don’t know if you’re legally allowed to reference that...” I muttered, eyeing the large gap between buildings before staring back at Plas. “I haven’t really done much uh... traversal practice. What if I fall and hit the ground I... I mean I don’t think I can die like that but-” “I won’t let you fall, I promise you. I’d be a real bad trainer if the first person I mentored became a permanent stain on 4th street. You got this!” Plastic Man grinned widely, flashing a thumbs up and stepping back. His words echoed in my head, as I stepped back a few feet, already making my plan as I dragged a line of slick slime in front of me. ‘I’ll run forward, using the slime to propel me even further to close the gap. Then when I get as far as I can, I’ll stretch my arms out, attach to the building and slingshot my way up to the roof.’ I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, waiting until every last bit of air left my lungs. And then I ran. My feet slid against the slime trail like a skater on the ice as I raced towards the edge. Before I could even attempt to jump, I hit the edge, my body fling more downward then I expected. I felt the air leave my lungs, my head snapping up towards the roof top I was aiming for and snapped my arm forward, splatting against the brick a few feet down. Damn it, Damn it, I got this. I got this. I felt the tension build in my arms, threatening to snap under the pressure. Just when I thought it was going to be too much, it released. And I found myself ascending just as fast I was falling. Up against the building. A wave of pain shot through my body as I was bashed against the wall, slowly feeling the way my body spread and slowly began to peel away from the window. Just as I felt the last few strand of myself start to detach, I felt a warmth wrap around my body, lifting me up to the roof of the building. “Hey you good? I never saw anyone but me rubber band that hard into a building before.” I tried to nod my head, wheezing and groaning as I laid on my back, staring up at the titan of a man before me. “I’m ok... just the wind got knocked out.” “Mm, yeah I’m not surprised. I mean if anything I guess we found out that a fall from here would be a-ok. Painful but... if you can survive going mach one into a building a fall should be no sweat.” He stretched his arms and sat down beside me, hands forming something just out of my range of vision to mess with. “Take your time, and we can try again. Maybe something with less of a gap to fall down.” I closed my eyes, a sickening knot forming in my stomach. I fucked up the jump, and fucked it up bad. Was he disappointed? Rethinking his decision to choose me? He had been teaching me for 2 weeks now, and I couldn’t help but think that I wasn’t enough by the way he’d sometimes look away, seem upset, maybe wanting to be anywhere else but here. My body slumped forward, lingering pain in my core. “Plastic Man?” His head cocked to the side, eyes unidentifiable behind his goggles. But I couldn’t bring myself to ask him what he thought of me. The words caught in my throat, my fear too great to hear the truth. I didn’t want to seem too pitiful, too... “I’ll try better next time.” “That’s what I like to hear.” ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- “GM what were you thinking?! You know you can’t handle that kinda heat, why did you head into a burning building?! No one was in there! Everyone was safe!” I ducked my head away from Plas’ rage, watching the soot swirl around the remains of my arm. I was hurt bad, nearly melted and burned in a raging fire me and Plas tried to contain. But I was careless, eager to please a man I thought was losing interest in me. Despite the fact the building was clear I thought if I could help put out the fire before the firefighters came he would praise my boldness. But I only ended up making a fool of myself, having to had Plas rush into the building and collect me himself. He didn’t fair well himself, parts of him still goopy from harsh heat damage. “Look at me when I’m talking to you! Why did you do that.” His eyes were angry, his usual smile twisted into a disappointed frown. “I wanted to impress you-” “Impress me?! Yeah your new power to turn into a corpse was real freaking impressive Jenna. Why the hell are you trying to impress me like that-” “Because I don’t think I’m good enough to be taught by you!” I exclaimed, shocked by how I raised my voice at him. “I... I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to... I just... I feel like ever since you started to mentor me I haven’t been good enough. I’ve always been messing up and-and I feel like if I don’t do anything to impress you, you’ll just abandon me and I’ll fuck up the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I-I look up to you so much, and I feel like it’s such a privilege that you chose me I... I feel like it’s a mistake. And so I’m just waiting for you to realize that and I feel like you’re catching on so I had to do something to make sure that you didn’t fuck up with your choice.” Plas’ face immediately dropped, a look of concern replacing his scold. “Christ... I gave you Imposter Syndrome. Is this what the other people with sidekicks have to deal with... Woozy was never like this. Er...well, no he was he just didn’t have powers.” He bit his bottom lip, and sighed, inching to take a seat beside me. “I’m not good at this teaching stuff, I don’t know if you noticed. So if I made you feel like you weren’t impressing me, I swear it isn’t true. I remember when I was first getting the hang of being a hero. I was dog shit. The amount of times I did somethings stupid or tried to impress others without knowing what I was doing myself, god... and when I was part of the league? The first month was a hell, I didn’t get anything done. I still mess up, I just make it seem like I don’t cause I play it off. We all screw up, even Superman. I would know, I was there for a couple of those times, etched em right into my head.” He glanced away, tapping the side of his head where the words ‘Pantsing Incident of 05’ appeared. “Point is we all started somewhere and we were all ass at it. You think Flash got the hang of dodging every car while he ran down the road? No, it was just that no one remembers those times cause he’s too busy kicking ass now adays that no one cares that one time he ate asphalt. No one accept me who uses it to blackmail him occasionally because I’m petty and like to knock him down a peg every once in a while. You’re doing great.” I could feel the tears dripping down my face as he spoke, using my palm to desperately hide my emotions from him. His arm wrapped around my shoulder in a cautious, yet caring touch. “Can we just not... run into burning buildings next time we’re trying to prove something? I might not be able to get you out next time.” “Yeah, of course sir. Thank you, for believing in me, after I did that, and that you believed me in the first place.”

#self ship: plas #have my scraps

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