#P Ballon

[suckerforblondeathletes]

Boyfriend

Paige Bueckers x Fem! Reader

Summary: Paige is just the definition of boyfriend.

Warnings: Nothing? Maybe kissing and some smutty talk?

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Paige is the definition of boyfriend. Which might seem weird to some, because she is a girl, but not to you.

Ever since y'all have became friends in high school, she has always looked out for you, got you anything you wanted and asked for, took you out to dinner and paid for the two of you when y'all would go shopping. Even thought she didn't want to.

Anyother way she was the definition of boyfriend. She did anything you wanted, whenever you wanted.

She is insanely whipped for you, always has been.

Thats the reason people found out about y'alls relationship...

--

"Paige can you go out to the car and grab my phone charger?" You asked sitting on the couch, your legs dropped over her legs and she was playing a game on the TV with KK in the teams apartment.

"Yeah, of course." She said almost immediately, throwing the controller on the couch and leaving the game and KK abandoned.

KK's mouth flew open in shock as she stood up like she got shot.

"Wow P, we were almost done with this game and you just leave?" Paige turns around while grabbing the door handle, "She needed a charger." She says as she shrugs her shoulders and makes eye contact with you while smiling, turning around and leaving out of the door, towards the car.

"Don't think I don't see what's going on." You hear KK say as she crosses her arms and squints her eyes.

Smiling innocently, you say "I don't know what you're talking about."

--

Another time y'all were caught is when the team and some friends went out for a pool day. Of course Paige invited you, and some of the team did too, enjoying your company because you were always over.

As you and Nina lazied out in the sun tanning and talking about current life status, you hear Azzi yell from beside y'all.

Looking over you see Paige and Ice have thrown water balloons at Azzi.

You see Paige raise her hand, a ballon in it, readying to throw, you stop her.

"Paige Madison Bueckers, don't you throw that at me. Put it up." Her face drops and she lowers her hand at your cold expression.

"Okay." Ice, Azzi, Nika and some others who watched what just happened turned to Paige in shock. Nobody could ever get stubborn Paige to listen to them like that.

"Ooouuuu." Heads turn to Kk who is hugging herself and making kissy noises, earning a push in the pool from Paige.

"I see you two." Azzi says with a wink to Paige, making her smirk and look at you, sending you a wink and walking away to put the ballon back up like you said.

--

The final time, which assured everyone of your relationship, was the WNBA draft.

You, Paige, and Azzi went to support their teammates start their professional basketball carrers.

"Babe, come on were going to be late." You hear Paige yell from outside of the bathroom in y'alls private hotel room.

"Coming." You yells as you open the door, "Can you help me zip up my dress, love?" You ask, moving your hair, giving her a clear view.

She whistles and walks up to you, grabbing your hips and pulling your back against her front. Smiling, and enjoying the view, she looks at you through the mirror and starts kissing your neck.

Seeing where this is going, you push her away. "No babe, just zip it up for now. I promise when we get back we can have as much fun as we want too." She rolls her eyes at your words, zipping up your dress anyways.

"You owe me for making me deal with being able to look at you in this dress and not being able to touch until later tonight."

-

When y'all arrive to the event, she can't keep her hands off of you. Wanting everyone to know you're hers, and only hers.

"Get a room" You two hear when y'all reach y'alls seats, her smacking your ass right before you sit down did not go unnoticed by her curly haired friend.

"She says not until tonight." Paige says, earning her a slap to her shoulder and an embarrassed you hiding your face in her neck.

She has always been a flirt, a teaser. Always letting you know when you look good, how you make her feel, and more.

It all just adds onto the conclusion, Paige is just the definition of boyfriend.

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Part 2? If you enjoyed this lmk! I just returned after some time, and thought I would give y'all some long awaited Paige talk.

[meazalykov]

pretty smile

lea schuller x dentalhygienst!reader

summary: your afternoon patient is someone you know too well

the early morning sun slips through the thin gaps in your blinds, casting a gentle glow over munich.

your morning routine unfolds with practiced grace: tying up the ribbons on your ballet slippers before pulling them off for the day, slipping into your hygienist scrubs, and mentally preparing for hours of diligent, focused work. 

as much as you love being a dental hygienist, nothing beats returning home to see your girlfriend, lea, whose accomplishments as a footballer have filled you with pride beyond words.

you've been there for so many of lea's moments, standing by her side, cheering her on. you still remember being in paris, watching as the bronze medal was placed around her shoulders at the olympics, your voice hoarse from shouting her name. 

same with the ballon d’or nomination—seeing her listed as one of the top 30 best footballers in the world. her achievements have always filled you with admiration and love, and every time, you’ve been right there, just as proud as the first day you saw her play.

lately, though, work has kept you away more than usual. thankfully, bayern works with your dental office, sending players in when they need treatment. you’ve met most of the team thanks to lea, and occasionally, some of the girls come in for their checkups. 

you don’t mind—seeing them makes you feel closer to lea on long workdays. but you’d never expected to see her at work without a heads-up, so when she surprises you by walking into the office with a sheepish smile, it catches you off guard.

“lea?” you ask, blinking in surprise as she approaches the front desk.

“hey,” your girlfriend of five years says, her smile softening as she takes you in, a playful glint in her eyes.

“what are you doing here?” you ask, glancing around to see if any of your coworkers have noticed the star striker’s presence. she lowers her voice and leans in closer.

“i might’ve been dealing with a toothache,” she admits, almost sheepishly. the confession surprises you even more because you live together—you would’ve thought she’d mention any discomfort.

“you didn’t say anything about it at home,” you say, keeping your tone light but laced with a hint of concern.

she shrugs, flashing that familiar grin. 

“didn’t want to worry you. figured i’d surprise you instead.”

you can’t help but laugh softly, your professional demeanor slipping just a little as you gesture for her to follow you. 

“all right, come on then. let’s get you in my chair.”

as she settles in, you adjust the chair’s angle, letting it recline slightly. the familiar ritual of preparing your sterile tools calms you, bringing you into a focused mindset, even though a small part of you can’t shake the giddiness of lea being here, sitting in front of you. 

you reach for her, gently placing the light-protective goggles over her eyes, which she fixes on you, staring with a quiet, loving intensity.

“you’re supposed to relax,” you remind her with a playful smile as you get started, positioning the overhead light and checking her teeth with care.

“can’t help it when you’re this close,” she murmurs under her breath as your gloved hands touch her teeth, her voice a soft tease. the words make your cheeks warm, and you have to focus to keep your hands steady. 

despite your efforts to remain professional, you’re aware of how her gaze never leaves you, even as you work.

“lea,” you say, trying to hide a smile as you gently prod her cheek. 

“sit still for me.”

“sorry,” she whispers, but her expression remains endearing, her eyes still focused on you in a way that makes your heart skip a beat. 

finally, as you finish cleaning her teeth, she lets out a soft breath, sighing in what sounds like relief.

“you look beautiful when you’re focused,” she says softly, making you pause. for a moment, you forget you’re even in a dental office, and with a small smile, you pull your face mask down, leaning over to press a light kiss to the top of her head.

“thank you,” you say, almost shyly, before straightening back up to finish your work. 

“you have a beautiful smile, by the way,” you add as you pull back, a hint of pride in your voice.

she laughs, a soft, genuine sound. 

“coming from you? that’s high praise.”

you smile back, squeezing her hand for a moment before getting up to grab the paperwork, letting her know that the dentist will be in shortly to check everything. 

as you make your way back to your desk, you catch your breath, feeling the lingering warmth of her presence as you complete the notes on her chart.

a few minutes later, the dentist speaks with you briefly. since you’re listed as lea’s emergency contact, she updates you, letting you know there’s nothing to worry about but advising you to keep an eye on it, just in case. 

“i’ll let the doctors at bayern know, too,” she assures you kindly.

“thank you,” you say with a polite nod before heading back to see lea. she’s sitting up now, her gaze soft as you enter the room.

“can i see that pretty smile again?” you ask, tilting your head and teasing her gently.

she smiles, her eyes sparkling as she smiles. 

“you have a beautiful smile, and nice teeth– i’m jealous!” you giggle.

“you’re one to talk. you have dimples, you know. makes your smile ten times better.”

you roll your eyes playfully, a grin spreading across your face. 

“whatever,” you mumble, though you feel a spark of warmth at her compliment.

you go over her recommended care, explaining it with the same attention to detail you’d give any patient, though your tone is softer with her, a warmth in your voice that only she brings out. 

“since we live together, i’ll keep an eye on it, but if it gets worse, tell me, okay?” you say gently.

“you’re so good at this,” she says, a hint of admiration in her tone. 

“always so professional. i don’t know how you do it.”

you chuckle, reaching over to tuck a loose strand of hair behind your ear. 

“i could say the same about you on the pitch. i guess we’re both pretty good at our jobs.”

she smirks, her gaze lingering on you for a moment longer before she slips off the chair, standing beside you. 

“maybe so,” she agrees, her voice softening. with one last lingering look, she takes your hand, squeezing it in a quiet gesture of gratitude before releasing it.

masterlist

[gummilutt]

More immersive pet treats - Giving treats now requires Sims to go out and buy them!

My anniversary celebration gifts so far have given us players a treat, the sims a treat, and as a player that also enjoys having pets, I thought it might be nice to finish off by giving the pets a treat! :) I enjoy making my game more immersive, and giving my Sims reasons to go out and buy things in OFB businesses as well as more chores/responsibilities. Now if your Sims want to reward their adorable furbabies, they best get on down to the pet store and buy some delicious delectable pet goodies!

The original object used was by RetailSims, who kindly agreed to let me use her objects for my pet global mods. I have improved upon the mesh to include cat treats, remapped it a little and made it easier to recolor. I am not that great at photo-editing but thankfully the kind and generous @kashmiresims agreed to create some fresh new recolors for it, providing textures for cat/dog, big dogs, small dogs and cats :)

How the mod works 1. Mod impacts current family only, because maybe your visitors brought treats with them. I do that sometimes :P 2. Only impacts residential and apartment lots, so that if you encounter strays on community lots, or took a pet on vacation, you don't have to worry about it (unless it is an owned vacation home). 3. For active family to feed treats to pets on residential or apartment lots, they must have a treat bucket object present on the lot, with treats left. Every time you feed a pet a treat, the bucket capacity goes down. When it runs out, you have to buy a new one. 4. Default setting on bucket is 20 treats. It is controlled in BCON 1003 on the object, so if you want a different number you can easily change it :) The bucket is quite large, so 20 seems a little ridiculous, but I wanted your Sims to actually need to buy one every so often and 20 seemed a good compromise. A smaller version of the bucket will be coming eventually.

Download on simfileshare

Conflicts: None that I know of. The bucket is a new object, separate from the original so you can have both.

Credits: HChangeri at RetailSims for the original bucket object, @kashmiresims for the lovely new recolors and generally motivating me to get things done! :) @gayars, @morepopcorn, @klaartjesimblr and @crispsandkerosene who kindly helped answer various meshing questions when I got stuck during the making of the new version of the bucket. Gayars who made the very cute heart ballons, that you can get here! DeeDee for the party hat accessory that I made an object and OMSP wrangled into a pet hat :3

This was part 3 of my Anniversary Gifts, find the rest here!

[horror-beeings-artandwriting]

hihihiiii could i request hcs for v1 and gabriel (separate) with a reader whos a wandering spirit in hell? take ur time!

Omg yes! Im gonna write it so it can be read as platonic or romantic, since you didn’t specify!!

Prompt: Headcanons

Characters: Gabriel and V1 (separate)

Pronouns: He/Him for Gabriel, He/it for V1 and they/them for reader!

Note: I headcanons v1 to be nonverbal like the other robots in hell. Just making noises similar to v2!

Gabriel:

When Gabriel first sees your soul wandering limbo. He is…rather confused. Your soul glows bright with purity. You aren’t a mindless husk that’s for sure…so why are you here…

He spends weeks watching you slowly wandering. You looked so scared. Confused…it made the angels heart ache.

He’d make sure to keep the husks out of your way. He tried to guide you, to the gluttony layer, to meet him. The judge of hell, but you always kept wandering the wrong way. Kept going to deep.

Until one day he had enough and just. Grabbed you. Scaring you half to well. You were already dead so. Scaring you to double death!

He calmed you down, said he was an angel, the judge of hell, that he wished to help your pour soul ascend to the heavens…(he didn’t even know if that was well, posible but eh)

I mean like obviously you’re a semi pure soul you were in limbo! The father’s light…can make mistakes right?

You made this man question his whole existence for a few hours

But that’s okay! You’re a sweetheart!

Just as long as you stay close to him and don’t get near any robots you should be fine!!

Right…? Yeah. Yeah. Probably.

V1:

He was…really confused, why didn’t bullets work on you , why didn’t you bleed. So it did the next best thing. And tried to grab you.

When you definitely saw him and moved out of the way, it let out a whirring almost whine like soul and stomped its foot.

You walked up to him, and it grabbed you again, poking and squeezing your face and arms. You were solid…and then. Well it started dragging you.

You are now his friendly neighborhood spirit, since you can float he would totally use you as a like. Ballon.

He keeps you close, and out of danger and even if it looses its precious P rank, he’ll stop and let you look around each layer.

Bring him husks (IE get their attention and have them follow you) he’ll be super happy! Or at least…you think the manic laughter like sound coming from him is happy….

Ehh….best not question.

He tries to give you blood, but ends up giving up when it keeps phasing through and ending up on the floor.

He has thrown you at things before. And always apologizes by, bringing you to whatever layer you wanna, I mean most of them are dead now sooo what’s the harm.

I hope you liked it! I kinda wrote V1 as how I play him. A stupid idiot who doesn’t know what he’s doing!

Also I love Gabriel ultrakill sm omgggg 😍

[br4tphobia]

mothers day . ♱ connie springer

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ details + Wc : 2,9k, Plug bby daddy! Connie x fem! reader, written with black woman in mind, idccc connie tanned !!!, connie being a sweet heart 🥹, connie callin the reader hella petnames, snuck in a lil bit of headcannons here n there!! , uses of baby, ma, mama and more, connie sneakin ina lil jokey joke, you/your pronouns used ! (not proofread, forgive me if u see any spelling mistakes.) NS4W + sex w/ some plot, passionate sex, dirty talk, unprotected p in v, oral (r receiving), breeding kink (ig .), fingering (r receiving) marking, missionary, pussy whipped connie !!, creampie and slight overstimulation .

✧˖*° vals note + this was lowkey ass n short (all of my work is) but hey ,, js a lil sumn thats late for mothers day, love everything yall do for yall children !!

its mothers day. the day where mothers are appreciated by children for what their mothers have did for them. you and connie have been dating for a while, only have one child, ava. life is perfect as it is and you wouldnt trade anything for it .

“boy what are you planninggg !”

your glossy lips pout dramatically, a blindfold covering your eyes and he guides you by your waist. “jus’ know its for you.” you suck your teeth, “well duh .. since you plannin all this shit, where ava?” “dont worry about allat, she with mikasa.” a exaggerated sigh fell from your lips, eager to see what ever hes gonna show you. “bae you scarin me ..” he leaves a reassuring grip on your waist and plants a kiss on your neck. “nothin to be scared about, now watch yo step. we going up the stairs .” “cant watch my step if im blind folded ~” “exactly why im here.” you cant help but feel yourself warm all over, his hands cupping around your waist, smooth tone of his voice, his audible accent.

when you both make it up the stairs which seems like forever, he removes one hand off your waist to open the door, “keep the blind fold on til i say you can take it off .” a small “ok..” leaves past your tongue, you fidget with your fingers nervously — connie doesnt do surprises like that ; but when he did, it was scary. “igh..take it off.” “papi, can you do it.. im nervous.” a small chuckle erupts from his chest, undoing the tie behind your head — before taking it off “ready, ma?” he questions you. you nod your head as a yes quickly, the darkness covering your vision fades away ; the blind fold dropped. your eyes adjust to the dim light in the room, “happy mothers day.” your eyes immediately widen along with a gasp. rose petals along the floor leading to the bed traced into a heart with red ballons reaching the ceiling with pictures of you, connie and ava hanging at the end. designer bags sitting infront of the pillows. such as Chanel, Louis vuitton and prada.

your eyes swell up at the scene. “you didnt..” holding your head up, trying to prevent those tears that’s threatening to fall. he pulls you into a hug, “i did. i love you and appreciate you for everything you did for this family.” whispering in your ear while he rubs circles on your back. “i-i love you too..thank you.” “save those tears mama, lets see yo gifts.” he grabs your arm and leads you to the bed. he watches you intensely as you smile from joy at the gifts, thats all he wants. to see you happy in life. “con..! i swear you’re too good to me!” your pretty face beaming, holding up the beautiful louis vuitton bag. tracing over the LV monogram logo ever so lightly. “you like it mama?” “i love it, baby, thank you. so so much !” his polished whites shine in your face from your response.

laying with him close after opening your gifts you catch him staring at you, the longer he looked at you, the more he fell in love. hell, even if you both are screaming at each other out of anger. “you ok..?” — “you're so pretty.” he's so confident in what he says you hate it, it always folds you. he's not afraid of thinking he's doing too much for you, flat out treating you like a princess more than he does his baby girl. he grabs your chin before your could respond and presses his lips against yours, you kiss back. your hand snaking up his neck, scratching his nape lightly with your solid baby pink nails. he tilts his head to the side to get more access to your lips, his tongue going past your teeth, tongues swirling around whilst he holds you still with his hand on your neck. lifting you up a bit to help you onto his lap. he groaned into your mouth as he pulled you on top of him, straddling his body. your tongues ran over each other so passionately, pulling away every other second to catch your breath.

he utters sweet compliments between every clash of lips, he always knows what to say to you. your plush thighs sit on his with your back arched, the kiss only getting deeper, his hands slid down to your hips and rocked them back and forth. you feel his hard on bump on your clothed clit causing you to moan, gaining the muscle memory of grinding ontop of him, you pull away from the kiss at the pleasure. “jus’ like that mama..” soft groans were shared through the room together from both mouths. til the point where he was leaking in his own pants he turns you in your back, swiftly scooting down to your thighs. he gave you a look of consent, you nod slightly, lowering the band of your shorts that you’ve been teasing connie with all day. his veiny hands pull both your shorts and underwear down in a swift motion.

you let out a light gasp at the cold air mixing with your hot core, you push your thighs together from the cold. “aht aht.. lemme see that pussy, keep those legs open ma..” his hand slid in-between your thigh and part them together. he licked his lips before diving in. he spat down on your core, slurping it up almost instantly. he runs his tongue over your folds, his nose bumping your clit — sending a shock wave to your pit of your stomach. “mm..con..” honey sweet moan fills his ears, your hand resting on his head whilst yours grip the sheets. placing sloppy kisses on your pussy, this man was eating you out like it was his very last meal of his life. slurping, smacking, and gulping down your slick, he knows he can eat pussy and tales advantage of it. “fuck..i love the way you eat this pussy papi..” your voice is breathy, more moans are formed and exhaled out of your mouth.

you rut your hips against his face, your juices running down his face dripping onto the silk sheets. you love seeing connie like this — hungry for you. the way he groans into your pussy at your taste, having his own make out session with your folds ; tongue fucking you ever so deliciously. "im gonna cum baby.." you roll your head back, waiting for your orgasm. every lick and plunge from his tongue brings you closer to the edge – god, you haven’t felt like this for while since ava was born. Everything starts to feel tingly and intense, he was desperate for you. “cmon.. make a mess on my face, mama.” Muttered through his messy mouth full of your arousal, you see white spots as soon as the pit in your stomach boils over. “mm shit babyy!” clawing at his dyed hair, shaking legs, broken moans, all that just by his mouth.

he made sure not to let a drop spill after pulling away, he charmingly smiles against your cum stained thighs, giving them a peck. “still with me, mama?” “ yea..” your voice is breathy, and rasp. Recovering from you recent orgasm, “ight, lift your arms .” his hands curve to your back as you do as he says. The shirt going over your head and dropping them back to your sides. “can I” he looks you dead, then trailing down to your laced bralette, hinting to take it off . “mhm” is your immediate response, feeling his slim tattooed fingers clip your bra of your chest. your nipples harden to the exposed surface of the air, “you gon lemme suck em ?” he raises a eyebrow, his tone teasing. you smile at his idiotic comment “oh my god.. yes…” connie hums at your quiet response, “yes, con. you can.” not even processing your answer he latches his mouth on your nipple like hes some type of leech. the warm wetness of his mouth soaking your nipple, whilst his other hand massages the other one — you let out quiet whines as hes twisting and pinching on it.

“imma prep you, ok, pretty?” hes slightly inaudible but you can still understand. he sliding his hand down your bare body, curving down to your inner thigh. connie collects the leftover slick and slides his lubricated digits into you. your walls immediately pulse around him index and ring, his thumb reaching to rub your clit. “oh my god..” shallow breathes escape, his long fingers massage the inside of your pussy, scissoring, pumping and curling against ; hitting all the rights spots. “just like that baby, oh fuck..” once he feels like hes gave that boob enough attention he switches, his mouth latching on your right one. you find yourself grinding on his fingers, the pleasure too much where you have to push your sticky thighs together, your nipple leaves his mouth with a ‘pop !’

“what i tell you ?” his tone hinted a warning , “to k-keep my legs open..”

“then do it, todays all about you. so let me make you feel good.”

he continues his actions with his fingers, simultaneously reaching up to give you a kiss. “think — you can ,, take me?” he’d push his fingers out through the kisses as you keep coming back for more, “yes, i need you so bad..” “dont say that, imma nut in my pants, mama” he rolls his eyes in resemblance of you. “boy pleasee” he gives you another smile before pulling his sweat pants down, you stop him. tugging on his shirt “take it off firstt” “ight ight,,” his shirt lifts over his head and thrown unknowingly in the room — his tanned abs on full display for you, god knew what he was doing when creating him cause lord.. hes so fine. “now ,, can i fuck you?” “of course.” he lowers the waistband to his thighs along with his PSD boxers. his tip slaps against his toned stomach with ongoing beads of precum oozing out the pretty brownish pink slit of his tip.

“ready, ma?” he says with a few strokes with his then — then sliding his girth through your folds. nodding another yes, he slides in. the wetness of your pussy squelches as he slids in, pretty tanned cock disappearing into your heat. “shit..” you head rolls back, eyes brows furrowing at the small stretch. “i know, ma..but you can take it..i know it.” his comforting words ease the pain, with his hand stroking your face. within a few moments he pulls out til the tip is only left inside you. “you think you can take me?” “yea..” “tell me if its too much.” whispering low, but loud enough for you to hear. he’d raise your leg on his shoulder and push back into you, sliding in and back out. making sure his rhythm wasn’t too slow or fast — from watching your facial expressions and body language, he kept his pace,

"mm.. fuck.." moaning softly, he could listen to your sounds every morning, evening, and night. "thats it mama.. " he lowers his head to the level of your neck, nibble and sucking on your bare skin. visible bite marks and hickeys grew one by one, connie loves marking you. he wants to know youre his, he loves you and wants to be there for you at all times. even when you both are on bad terms. the way his shaft disappears into every-time he rocks back into you. pushing out moans more and more, “look at you.. takin this dick so pretty..” he groaned at the feeling of your getting wetter at his choice of words. you wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him inches closer than what he already was to collide his lips with yours. tongues tangling beautifully together, moans, groans , and whimpers where the only thing shared along the soft skin clapping.

pulling away from his intoxicating lips, to catch your breath. he moves back down to your hickey, covered neck to add more. whispering how good it is against your neck “fuckk i miss this pussy..” — “got me wantin to nut already..” “mm..” whimpering as he brushes his tip against your cervix again. he angles his hips at certain directions to find your spot, watching your body language once again. His finger tips grazing over your beautiful curves while thrusting into you so sensually as hes laying kisses on your neck. "fuck papi.. faster.." your body squirms at neediness, just for him to obey your request — snapping his hips quicker then before, not too fast nor slow, hed do anything just to make sure you were pleased, in and out of bed! he loves you too much to leave you unsatisfied. “mm shitt !” you breath hitches on how deep he got, bumping places inside you that you couldnt reach with your own fingers, he watches your boobs bounce at the rhythm of his strokes as you grip on once tightly, those plump lips slightly agape to release moans, the crease between your hips and thighs from having your legs on his shoulders.

another moan came from you lips, the volume of them getting louder as he hits your g spot. “right here, ma?” he softly puts his hand over the small bulge re-appearing every other thrust, “y—yes! don’t stop baby.. fuck im g’na cum..” oh, he most definetily wont stop. your back arches from the pleasure, scratching on Connie’s back for some type of stability, leaving scratch marks he would definitely admire in the morning. “cum, mama. nut on this dick.” more thrusts, clit stroking, and groping away from your second orgasm. connie loves how whiney you get before you cum, your high pitched moans and whimpers is the most euphoric thing to hear from you, letting him know that you feel good. “baby..baby im cu—" cut off by a silent moan, his strokes get deeper then — what you thought — he possibly could get. gushing over his length, a white ring forming on it.

"fuuck.." he slows down to prevent himself from cumming too soon, but still allowing you to ride out your orgasm. your voice is quiet mumbling "oh baby"s, your pretty face relaxed with your lips shaped into an O. "feels so.. — fuckin good.." his voice is pitched, head thrown back and eyes screwed shut, still continuing his intoxicating thrust which feels like light shocks from being overstimulated. he looks down to admire your facial features, he cant get enough of you, not even if he tried. "you like that? this dick fuckin you deep?" his voice is slightly hoarse, "yesyes mmhpp" you cover your mouth with your hand to muffle your sounds, not wanting to get louder. "let me hear you." , he grabs your hand and places it your tummy buldge.

"i-im sorry... ohmygodd.. you fuckin me so good, papi.." your wet sounds from your previous orgasms leaving his lower stomcach sticky. "shit..gonna cum mama.." cant help but feel embarassed from being close too soon, but you dont care. you also want him to feel as good as you do. "fill t-this pussy up.." his cock twitching inside your silk walls, “yeah? tell me how much you want it.” thats one thing he loves, seeing you plead for anything from him, probably one of his biggest turn-ons. “so bad baby.. mhpp! make me a mom of two..” Thats all connie hears, two. "thats what i like to hear, mama.." his pace picks up, "s-shit baby..fuck im cumming.."

his breathing quickens before he lets out a drawn out groan of your name followed by a few other thrusts. letting out whimpers at his thick seed sitting inside you before dripping onto the sheets. soon he pulled out, watching in awe whilst trying to catch his breath. "jus’ wait til fathers day. imma make it up to you." refering to everything hes did for you today, "lookin forward to it, catch yo breath. i ain done." "wha..?" "you head me, imma make sure you a mother of two."

theemrsjaeger 2023 © do not plagiarize, copy, or repost anything I post. 🩶

[gadriezmannsgirl]

Male and female Barca players are now playing at the same time as females are getting recognition in the football industry. Pedri and reader (who is a three time ballon d’or winner and two time golden girl winner for Barca) start fooling around, to which reader ends up pregnant. When she finds out she doesn’t tell anyone and keeps the secret for two months (she is still playing, since she’s really good she able to make sure she doesn’t hurt herself or the baby). Pedri decides to go check up on her as well as to see if she’s ok, since she’s been really quiet at practices and everyone noticing that she’s not her usual happy self. She then tell him the news (despite thinking he would reject the baby, since he says he doesn’t want a relationship and doesn’t really want kids) however, she gets the opposite reaction and the support from him, as well as him scolding her for playing two months straight despite being pregnant. Two years later they are at the Barca stadium (idk if it is called camp nou or not, however you can name it the original) celebrating her and his champions league win and they tell the world the two little angel they have and play with their kids, as well as everyone pointing out her ring on her finger.

Not The Best Start - P.G8

Summary: Random hookups can lead to something more.

You knew what you were getting into when you felt his lips collide with yours for the first time; you knew he didn't want a serious relationship, both of you so young with only twenty-two years.

P whole life ahead, your whole career in front of you and it all crashed down when you saw that little stick with the words pregnant on it.

You laughed, you screamed and you cried.

You didn't wanted to give up on football not when it has finally broke the stereotypes and women could train and workout along the men team, both being treated as equals by everyone, media, fans and galas.

You broke the stereotype when you won two years in a row at the age of twenty, a Balloon D'Or Femení and two years before that, two Golden Girls, all of them at the club of your dreams, FC Barcelona. You, along your teammates were and are inspiration to the little girls who liked football and wanted to be like you when they got older.

You had so much to achieve... And you got pregnant. And best news, you weren't in an established relationship with the dad of your baby.

And the baby daddy was none other than Pedro González López, better known as Pedri, number 8 of the Barça's male team and also the 21 of the Spanish team. The man, who everyone loved, screamed and prayed nothing that bad happened to him.

He was also starting his career and you couldnt do that to him. If you had to stop your career, then it would be just yours, because youre not as selfish as youd like to be and neither wanted to make him choose, mostly because you wouldnt like to hear how he would choose his career over a few hook ups that ended up badly. He wasnt ready to settle down, he said it himself. And nothing can tie down anyone.

Thats how you hided it, you didnt tell anyone; not even to your best friend, that you were expecting a little one, especially because you didnt know how people would react and because you wanted to enjoy the little time you had left for football before your belly became noticeable and force you do some motherhood leave.

But as a result, you started distancing yourself from your teammates, from the guys of the male team, shutting every hang out down and just being in your own little world. Which you didnt know but it grabbed a certain Canario's attention.

"Aitana" Pedro called "Is everything okay with Y/L/N?" He looked towards where you, Ronald, Lewy and Mapi were training.

The brunette girl shrugged her shoulders "I really don't know, Pedri. She has been in her own world, we try to talk to her but she backs out again and again"

Pedri sighed heavily, he hated seeing you like this. Truth is, you have been too busy pushing everything and everyone out that you were also pushing him out, when in fact, he had missed you deeply the past few weeks and he longed to see you, spend some time with you just chatting or making a new recipe you wanted to give a try.

He was comfortable with you, he loved being around you and the first week you haven't reached out for him, he was confused but let it go thinking you needed some alone time, still he kept on texting you. And when he saw you didn't replied his messages, didn't answered his calls and made no attempt to look out for him, he started to feel his chest heavy and soon he got the news you had left Spain because of a family emergency.

Now that you were back, he tried to talk to you but you kept on getting away and with your guys's busy schedules, he hasn't been able to make the effor he would like to do.

"Training's done! We can go home now and girls, good luck on tomorrow's match!" Pedro heard your coach said as all of you smiled and thanked his support. You inmediately went to the girls bathroom so Pedro couldn't chase you and when he was done with himself you were already gone.

"¡Puta madre, joder!" (Holy shit, fuck!) He said frustrated to no one in particular

"Hey, Pedri. Are you coming to the match tomorrow?" Ona asked him with a small smile

"Yes, of course" This was his chance to talk to you.

...

"Another goal from Barcelona's 7, the amazing Y/N! The Camp Nou is roaring along her!"

"That goal was beautiful and look at her doing her freeze signature, her teammates joining her and look at that! Half Camp Nou joined her too!"

"The power this girl has is insane, another hat trick added to Y/L/N's long list!"

And that night you girls won, Pedri along his brother watching you with a long smile on their faces. Pedri told his brother he would get down to congratulate all of you girls when he saw you getting out of the changing rooms

"Y/L/N!" You freezed when you heard his voice and then picked up your pace making Pedri follow you "Wait, I need to talk to you!" Eventually he catched up on you "Hola"

You stayed quiet just looking at him

"How are you?" Nothing "You did great today" Still nothing "Is something wrong? I've been trying to contact you but you keep on distancing yourself. We all have noticed, we are worried, I'm worried Y/N, we were good one day and the other-"

"I'm pregnant" You said cutting him off

"What?"

"I'm pregnant" You repeated "and it's yours" Now it was his turn to not say anything "That's why I have been distant, I'm trying to get my head around it and I know you may not want it but I'll keep it and you don't have to worry about it, if you don't want to... Like... I know you aren't ready to settle down and a baby is a huge responsability and I know you don't have feelings for me in that kind of way" You laughed nervously "I have been trying to know how to say this to you since well you're the father of the baby but I totally understand if-"

Now it was his turn to shut you up, however he did it differently.

You were shocked when you felt his lips on top of yours and his arms around your body bringing you into him.

"Gracias" He said smiling "Making me a dad, you're incredible, bonita!" You were confused "What were you thinking tho? Playing football around while being pregnant? You know what could happen if you get fouled or something?!"

"I-"

"Y deja de decir tantas locuras" (And stop saying nonsensed things) He whispered against your lips "We'll be parents" He pecked your lips once again "And a little thing, I have been in love with you for a long time now" You smiled

"I don't want to tie you down or pressure you with this, two months ago you weren't sure about having a baby until you were twenty-seven!"

"Number over here, another number over there, it doesn't matter anymore. We'll have our baby, together. Like a couple if you want"

You smiled "Of course I do" He smiled

"Then I'm glad you had THE greatest performance ever because that will be your last one for now"

"Ni de coña, Pedro. I still have more months to go before baby gets bigger"

"We'll see about that"

... TWO YEARS LATER ...

"Barcelona, winners of the Champions League!"

"Both, female and male team have outdone themselves for this; bringing to the Camp Nou, not only both LaLiga's, Copa del Rey and la Reina but also Champions League. What a season!"

"Ready for the show, bonita?" Your fiancé, Pedro asked you with a smile on his face as he held Alba on his arms as you held, Matías. You smiled at your twins and at your fiancé.

"Ready"

You both got in line with your respective teams to step into the Camp, both kids in each others arms. You were presenting your babies to the world after two years and not only your babies but also your relationship with Pedro.

You had to fake an injury to be able to do your motherly leave and not be pressured by the media constantly, having a whole year off, doing some training at home and dribbling with Pedro in your backyard. You were back this season and you still got it, helping your team win three titles in a single season.

It was a bit hard with the kids and the travelling from both sides but you made it work always. And no one suspected a thing.

Until now.

You received congratulations from both teams and your staff while headed to do some interviews with your babyboy whilst Pedri was with your babygirl. Both kids had a respective parent jersey number and both of your last names together.

Questions were thrown left to right but you didn't answered the ones about your private life or baby's like their names, people can guess. After a long while of press (The one where you received a lot of praise for your looks now in motherhood and for your crazy skills at football), you were able to reunite with your lover and babygirl.

"It was a craziness" He said making you laugh as you peck his lips

"It was but nothing we can't handle" You say and he laughs nodding when Matías started to fuss as his eyes were glued to the ball "¿Jugamos, mi vida?" (Wanna play, my love?)

"Si" He said smiling at you as you left him on the floor and soon Alba was groaning too

"Yo también" (I do too)

"Venga pues, vamos a jugar" (C'mon then, let's play) "Hey" Pedro called you making you turn around "Te quiero y gracias, bonita" (I love you and thank you)

"Y yo a ti, cariño" (And I you, darling) You smiled into the kiss, Pedri pulled you in to before making your way with your twins.

At the end of the day, everyone, fans and those who weren't fans, were going crazy at the amount of content they were getting with their now favorite couple and family.

°°° °°° °°° °°°

Taglist: @gaviypedrisbride @stuckinaf4nfiction @elijahslover @azzpenswrld @http-isabela

[malspinningyarns]

Random thoughts during Bridgerton season 3 rewatch, episode 3

The dream is so Mr. Darcy walking across the foggy field in the 2005 P&P

There is a editing mistake where Violet walks to Francesca twice pre and post Benedict’s comment to Gregory

Colin at Breakfast:

Love Charlotte’s heart wig

Phillippa is so dumb. But this is why sex ed is important

Varley is so happy Penelope has a visitor and it’s Eloise

Another wrap to hide Claudia’s broken arm

No one really is going to notice Colin and Penelope unchaperoned again, aren’t they?

Colin’s coat looks dark purple in the light and Pen’s wrap has purple in it.

This is the most awkward Colin has ever been

Those are some massive antlers on that one taxidermy buck

Speaking as someone who is around a lot of taxidermy at work, you kinda just get used to it. But I see that look on Debling’s face very regularly

Debling’s WTF look the Cressida’s comment about rather being a predator than prey. 😂

There are some judgy faces from the Cowpers when Lord Cutbill talks to Francesca

Colin is in yellow, Penelope is in blue

Debling, don’t compare a woman to a dead animal (even I think their conversation is kinda cute otherwise)

The ballon is yellow and blue! (Of course it is)

I love that Dankworth is smart enough to make a double entendre and the Finches don’t get it

Colin is so down bad watching Penelope lick her fingers

Cressida is so lost at the beginning of the conversation with Debling

Penelope’s confusion at Eloise reluctantly bringing up the Great Auk and Eloise responding look of “Don’t ask” is a great moment

Penelope trying to get in on this bird conversation is me at work

I think this look is the best Colin look

Poor Colin is being bullied by these two guys

I do love Will and Alice even if I don’t fully know the purpose of their plot

I literally can’t figure out how old Lady Tilly is supposed to be

Business bitch in a sparkly suit

If I was Eloise, I also would not want to be a witness to this conversation

I love that it was the Dankworths getting interrupted that caused the balloon problem

Way to go everyone leaving Pen behind

Colin is so angry that Hawkins just gets on the balloon (and probably that Debling “saved” Pen)

Portia straight up denies Lord Hawkins in the cuntiest way. 😂

Love the suspenseful music for Cressida and Penelope’s chase to Debling

Francesca hearing he wants 8 children just smothered that relationship

Violet’s face crack realizing Marcus is Lady Danbury’s brother

The way Fran and John keeping looking at each other is very cute

Penelope using Colin’s comments about bravery to talk to Debling 😭

Debling just gave Cressida’s lemonade to Penelope, which is kinda a dick move. This man is fickle

Colin absolutely is not subtle around his mom

Colin’s head turn at that music chord is just *chef’s kiss*

I’m obsessed with the cellist’s crazy wig

So much gold in the foreground with the blue night in the background.

Colin’s going to cry watching this dance

[popculturebuffet]

Top 12 Captain Holt Plots (B99): RIP Andre Braugher

Andre Braugher 1962-2023

So as if this year hadn't piled enough death on me.. yesterday Andre Braugher of Brooklyn 99 fame died. Braugher was a comedic genius, great at drama and it's sad to see him go just as his career was having one hell of a second act.

Figuring out how to honor Andre.. was tough. I didn't have time for a full review of some of his best episodes, a story arc or the normal things i'd do, and a list of just Holt's best moments wouldn't really portray the characters depth. Don't get me wrong there's a LOT of hilarious little holt moments from "Hot damn!" to "Bam had it both ways" but it just didn't do the character justice. Holt was a character funny for his stoicism, his outburst of emotion clashing with that, and his chemistry with just about everyone on cast.

So I found a comprimise, something small I could do before my two bigger reviews this week, but something that still pays full service to what a great character Raymond Holt was... and how much of it was Braugher's amazing comedic timing and great dramatic talent. Ray MIGHT of existed without Captain Holt, but he wouldn't of been such a JOY to watch every time if it weren't for Braugher.

So I picked my 12 faviorite plots starring Captain Holt. Husband, Captain, Robot. Meeep Morp.

12. VINDICATTTTITOOOOOONNNN (Episode: Monster in the Closet)

Look a lot of this subplot making it here is this moment, from the fist pump to just how Braugher plays the word like an instrument, but the plot itself is comedy gold: Rosa Diaz, bisexual icon, is having a rush wedding to absentee boyfriend and human disaster Adrian Pimento, who returned after months in hiding the way anyone having a normal one does: by hiding in a child's closet.

Naturally this wedding didn't end up happening.. but it did bring us one of Holt's best running gags: his love of balloon arches. It's something that makes perfect character sense: he's a perfectionist, he loves art, and it's just weird enough to still be funny while not so weird you can't understand why Holt would be doing this. Holt pettily popping the ballons when crticized and going into a creative tailspin over minor critcisims is just gold and the payoff, him getting his VINDIIIICAAAATTTIOOOONNNNNN is both sweet.. and purespun gold from the highest of heavens.

11. The Disco Strangler Returns (He Said She Said) One of the serious episodes of the series, dealing with Amy and Jake tackling a sexual harassment case and Amy revealing her own assault, was paired with one of the series silliest, funnest b-plots.

This one COULD be here just on the strength of "And you'll here it again" but has way more to offer as Holt chases down his former nemesis the Disco Strangler after he seemingly dies, convinced he's alive while Terry and Boyle are convinced he just can't accept his enemey's death. Turns out their wrong though as the Strangler is alive, worked his groovy voodoo on a way younger woman and has one of the funniest scenes in the show as Holt TRIES to have a big action hero final talk with his nemisis.. only for the man to be largely deaf. It's a gag that shoudln't work but Baugher's commitment to the bit carries it, as does the reality of the strangler being so old and feeble hitting Raymond about his own mortality.

10. The Heists (Various Episodes)

Yeah this one's a bit of a cheat as it was hard to pick just one Heist Plot: After the first two their largely ensemble pieces. But it'd also be criminal to ignore just how SERIOUS Holt takes the annual halloween heists, from training his dog for them, to calling a fake replacement for Cheddar (the goodest of boys) "This bitch?", the Heists brought out the pettiest, hammiest parts of holt and the best of Braugher's comedey from threatning to slit his two protege's "from head to anus and wear them as a jacket", to his flight of the valkyries entrance, Holt was always a delight.

9. Pie (Two Turkey's) The shows final thanksgiving gave us it's best thanksgiving plot, and a nice spotlight on Holt's relationship with his Husband , kevin. Holt's queerness was baked into the character, being why it took him so long to climb the latter and why Kevin takes ab it to warm up to his new coworkers, as most of Ray's past coworkers were racist, homophobic or both. Holt and Kevin were just as weirdly stoic, with Mark Evan Jackson having great chemistry with Braugher.

The couple also just had their own weird things such as getting a special pie every year to get a pie for thanksgiving and finding the hours spent in dead silence on the trip deeply romantic.

Said pie is also what sets off the plot as it goes missing and Holt blames the presicnt and goes into full petty holt mode, one of the best kinds of holt. HOlt isn't the only star here as near constant fuckups and wallpaper Hitchcock and Scully prove useful for once as Holt investigates Rosa, Terry and Boyle. We get great moments from the three too as Boyle calls his own son "a basic bitch" and Rosa reveals an embarassing minons t-shirt as she rebonds with her family post jailtime.

Holt interogating everyone and going full ham would be enough to land it here.. but what elevates it to this slot is the ending: Holt finds out the culprit was Kevin, who hates the pie but would miss the drive. HOlt suggests simply.. taking the drive for fun and Kevin is super horny for that. It's adorable, sweet and a great capper to one of the shows best subplots.

8. Let's Never Talk About Anything (Stakeout)

This is a quick one as it's mostly on the comedy but it's a scenario that's both deeply, deeply funny, and involves one of the shows best duos: Rosa, the stoic bicon herself, and Holt. Both being stoic queer persons, they naturally get along great. And of course it's natural Rosa ends up the one in a very awkward situation through almost no fault of her own: Holt brings his cardboard standee of a human being Nephew named Marcus, whose staying with him for some reason never elaborated upon because Marcus is here for one thing: to date rosa and have one of the best awkward morning afters EVER: He tries to sneak rosa out.. only for Holt and Kevin to naturally both be up, and his using her full name and mild confusion are just.. great. The wrap up, that Rosa and Holt are both FINE not talking about this or anything ever, is great. The followup plot with the two forced into a dinner is fine, but this first interaction and the two being on the same stoic page is gold.

7. Apparently That's a Trigger For Me (The Box)

This is another one that has a strong moment couched in, but really the Box is just a very strong episode, a tense 22 minutes as Jake and Holt team up to try and get a confession out of a local dentist played by sexiest man alive Sterling K Brown, who does great getting under their skin, including with said doctor bit as Docterates are a bit of a trigger for Holt. the episodes fantastic chess match between our faviorite duo and Brown is just fun to watch and it's only this low because Jake gets the big finale. But Holt's oh damns are still vital. As is his over the top reservation cancelation. God bless this man. I miss you andre.

6. They never actually said No (Full Boyle)

Like, really, ALL of these there's a classic gag couched in here as Holt explains how he formed his black gay and lesbian police orginzation: he pitched it to his fellow entirely white and certainly straight cops who laughed their asses off.. then went ahead and got the funds since they were too busy being jackassses to say no. Dark, hilarious, and perfectly showing just how much shit holt's been through trying to get here.

And that background helps shape this plot which while not laugh FREE is mostly anchored on the good Captain's character journey: when a younger officer plans to challenge holt for predsency, Holt, as you'd expect digs in and refuses. He's not at full ham yet, but he's still fully willing to fight tooth and nail for this, that after all he had to go just to make this group, brian wouldn't understand

It's Gina of all characters who points out that's why he made the group. So younger officers wouldn't have to go through that. Brian has new ideas to genuinely improve and open up the doors for more queer black officers, and Holt recognizes that and steps aside.. though if he screws up he will impeach him. He's happy for him but he will impeach him.

5. I've Glanced At His Work Satchel (The Honeypot)

This episode's a-plot is just one long hilaroius bit of holt deadpanning as he gets a new assitant to replace Gina.. only to find the guy flirting with him. Having his tie slightly ajar and inviting him to a barrel museum counts as flirting in Holt's book. Turns out Gordon is a spy for our heroes latest nemisiss, corrupt comissioner kelly, and this brings this plot to ahead as finding out, and getting evidence hw as actively spying on them finally gets rid of the old bastard. It's a nice payoff.. but it's really here because Holt declaring a barrel museum an erotically charged atmosphere is classic deadpan holt. If you want premium deadpan holt, this is your episode.

4. Terry Come Here and Dangle Me Off the Edge of this Building (Bad Beat)

This episode is one of my faviorites, having both a lot of rich character stuff for holt.. and a lot of funny deadpan for holt.

This ep reawakens something that's mostly come up previously as a joke: holt had a serious gambling addiction in his past and when Jake and Terry come to him for help with a poker case, Holt's forced to join in as the two have obvious tells.

Holt's relapse is a nice mix of hilaroius and deeply troubling: he's betting on childrenj's gymnastics (No jayla don't drop the baton!) runs up to the roof when the pagent's cut off and as seen above wants Terry to dangle him over a roof.. Braugher does a hell of a job threading a very narrow needle here: Hotl's antics are funny, but still jarring enough to be worrying.. .and the laughter stop when Jake pulls the one card he has... he'll tell kevin, an idea alone that DEVISTATES holt as he can't put kevin through that again.

Unfortunately it's not THAT easy as Holt goes rogue.. then nearly gets captured, having to use improper grammar and admitting he needs help. Ther'es no easy answers here and while granted Holt's addiction never comes up again.. it's a sign addiction dosen't go away easily and everyone needs help.

3. The System (Moo Moo) Props to Brooklyn 99 as depsite being a cop show, it pointed out many a problem in the NYPD and police in general long before George Floyd made it too loud to ignore for us white dumbasses.

This episode is the main showcase of that: while the show had plenty of corrupt cops for our heroes to foil, Moo Moo shows the system ITSELF is broken and ther'es no easy answer to fix it.

The setup is simple, heartbreakingly common, and painful: Terry goes out at night in his nice neighborhood looking for one of his daughters "moo moo", her faviorite toy.. only to get accosted by a police officer, with only the fact he IS an officer making this end well.

Terry does try to handle this peacefully, inviting the guy to lunch, and trying to explain why racial profiling him like that was fucking awful. The officer dosen't listen, only thinks he was wrong because Terry is also a cop, and is generally a dick.

This leaves terry, who has a promotion on the table, with a fairly simple path: report the son of a bitch. Except .. HOlt dosne't send it in. Holt wants Terry to stay quiet, so Terry can get promoted. it's one of the oldest fights in a broken system: Should you make noise and take care of something horrible immdeitly, or stay quite and let harm go on so you can do more good later. The latter is clearly Holt's go to not out of corruption but out of survival: as a black gay cop, he had no real allies for the longest time, and thus had to simply keep his nose to the ground and work his way up to where he had real power. Terry on the other hand, argues, rightly that he dosen't want another man like him to go through this, one without a badger and that his career... simply isn't worth more innocnet black men being arrested falsely. There isn't an easy resolution with both acknowlding each others point: Holt supports terry and gets the guy fired, but Terry is passed over impliclty as a result and admits he could've impacted more change. Terry still did the right thing.. but it wasn't the easy thing. Police.. .simply aren't set up to properly police themselves and change is needed and it was noble of b99 to point that out without going over the top with it.

2. BOONNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEE (The Skyfire Cycle)

Okay look while this plot is good on it's own (I"m teaching father the math!) it's up this high ENTIRELY due to the Bone Scene. You've seen it, i've seeen it, it's the reason this plot goes from "pretty good" with Rosa seeing through holt's math problem to his marital issues and need to get laid, and Amy trying hard to impress her dads and acting lik ea grossed out child anytime holt's sex life comes up. This bit belongs to braugher.. but you NEED Beatriz and Fumero to set it up so perfectly and react so great to it.

Rosa being rosa just comes out and says "You just need to bone" and holt LOOOSES IT.

Every line from that moment is pure poetry from Braugher's mouth, from his squeaky "what'dyousay" to his shakesperean "hooooowww dare you detective diaz I AM YOUR SUPERIOR OFFICER." and of course his glorious shouts of BONE and BONNNNENEEEEE while he VIBRATES ON HIS DOORFRAME. His quick yups in the resolution are the cheery on top of the greatest comedy sundae ever conducted by man. Sports. This subplot hinges on one joke.. but when it's the series best joke, it's REALLY hard to argue. It's only not #1.. because our #1 is CRAMMED with jokes near this level.

Ding Dong The Wuntch Is Dead (Ding Dong)

Ding Dong is one of my faviorite episodes of B99. Even it's subplot's grown on me with Terry bending a quarter in mid air and the strawberry basket. But let's face it while the subplot is.. kay, it's the main event that makes it a classic and when I do the inevetible top 12 list, possibly for feburary, this episode is almost guarnateed a spot for damn good reason.

If your wondering why I haven't brought up Holt's legendary rivarly with Madeline Wuntch it's because while their all fucking gold, their teid into larger plots. And while this one kinda is, with Wuntch's death wrapping up Holt's time as a patrol officer, it's really just there to sned the character off and give us one of the funniest episodes in human history.

Everything about Holt's petty rivarly with Wuntch that makes it one of the best thigns in the show is on display here and the shock I had to the opening of ding dong was palpable: Holt's making his usual jabs, calling her a korean tolilet ghost (and having gone to korea just to find new monsters to call her).. before Terry, trying and failing to head this off drops the bomb: Wuntch is dead. Naturally Holt dosen't buy it, assuming we'd hear the children singing (all the childrne everywhere), and having to see her body for himself. Given their rivarly and what an elaborate scheme Wuntch left FOR her funeral, it's not hard to see why.

What follows is the very best of petty holt from the glory that is BAGEL, BAGEL, to his assumption ET is a monster because "he caused quite a comotion), Baugher is at his PEAK this episode comedically, handeling his Rival's death with joy and too many lines to count, with Amy's horror and Rosa's unabashed joy at his pettiness being perfect bounce off points.

Add in comedy legend Micheal Mcdonald as Wuntch's nephew playing her rival, a fake funeral and an attempted funmeral full of balloon arches and bright pastels and you have one of the greatest peices of televesion comedy ever. Rest in peace Andre.... your dearly missed.

[realmadridfamily]

Vini loosing the ballon dor is the real karma for ignoring and ghosting Bellingham from all of you madridista

Club should of been fair and not supporting one over other cuz Bellingham reached the euros final and played great only if he won it it would of been him 100% and no one would of said anything why ? Cuz he’s whole season great he deserves it even when he didn’t score he played great saving our chances by defending and winning duels and returning balls to attackers and sacrificing physically but as long as he’s not scoring no one loves him

This is the KARMA

I don't believe you actually believe this :) You know why Vinicius didn't win? Because for months there was a campaign against him. If you read the statements of the journalists responsible for the votes, you will understand what a big circus this is and how they did everything to prevent him from getting more votes. I respect that someone considers Rodri their favorite, I really do! But I have to laugh when someone explains it by saying that it's because he was a student and doesn't have social media xD Or another one who talks about the 2022/2023 season!!! Or another (who is a die-hard Barca fan) doesn't give Vinicius ANY points because he claims he doesn't influence Real Madrid's game xD Is someone like that objective or call himself an expert? Please! When Vinicius became the favourite after the Champions League final because, whether anyone likes it or not, he was our leader in that competition, they started "looking" for a rival for him. They started changing the criteria, they started changing the rules. Why? Because Vinicius is uncomfortable. Someone will say, why Rodri and not Carvajal, since he won the Champions League and the Euro (competitions taken into account)? Because Carva is from Real Madrid! And the fact that Real Madrid is in conflict with UEFA and La Liga doesn't help. I wrote that Vinicius is the "Ballon d'Or of the people" like Karim two years ago. Why? There have always been some controversies, but I have never seen reactions like these. The fact that Rodri was booed by people before the gala, or that people shouted "VINI!" before the announcement even though they already knew the truth, says it all. Why is this happening? Because people love players like that. He can be controversial, but when he starts dancing with the ball people hold their breath. People see the difference, the problem is that there are those who ignore it because they don't like him or they are antimadridistas. And that's not what it should be about. So no my dear, it's not Karma but pure politics. What's more, Real Madrid knows more about this than anyone thinks and I know that sooner or later someone will tell what happened behind closed doors. As for Jude, stop making him out to be a martyr or some other p**sy, it's starting to get annoying. It may surprise you, but when I spoke to other Madridistas, opinions were divided between Vinicius, Jude and Dani. It was the same on various forums and on portal X. Any win would make us very happy! What's more, in Madrid it was believed that Jude had a better Euro individually than Rodri, who was replaced in the final by Zubimendi and there was no visible difference. And if England had to replace Jude with someone else they would have bigger problems than Spain. So don't say that someone underestimated him because no one did it, but in the end you have to bet on the one who has a better chance. Vinicius began to be supported the most when it turned out that he was the favorite. Also by Jude himself! This is called strategy. And don't lie that nobody "loves him" because he doesn't score goals! Don't make up nonsense! Madridistas appreciate the work he is currently doing and respect him even more. Everyone wants him to return to his position and only someone crazy would say that it's his fault. Seriously, I don't know where you get such things, but I would advise you not to look there anymore.

[rpreaperperson]

5 : Corruption

For more : masterlist

While inside the jeep Claw slightly leans Soap's buffy arm fidgeting her fluffy tail, still sulking as Ghost glare at her

Feeling sorry for the Half breed Soap stroked her head while conversing with the two members of Los Vaqueros

“Kids, Guns, and Ballons that's a new one” quip Soap glancing at Ghost, Claw peaked from his side

Her ears tickled Soap's chin as the ears twitching, a beautiful city yet surrounded by death and corruption

“Where can we find him?” ask Soap

“Who?” Claw lifted her head stare at Soap curiously

“El Sin Nombre, Claw...didn’t you hear what we talking about?” Ghost scold her again

“I-I heard it..” she pout ears flatting against her head when Ghost wanted to lecture her again

“Relax L.T, don’t want our kitty to be sad, look at her!”

“give ‘im ‘that’ eyes” Soap whispered at her ear, and her mouth became O knowing what Soap means, meanwhile both Vaqueros felt sorry for Claw, especially Alejandro

“P-please Master...~ forgive me..” Alejandro's eyes widen open so is Ghost

‘Damn you Soap! you know my weakness!!’ mohawk man staring at the car window acting ignorant avoiding Ghost glares

“w-well...just..don’t do that again” Claw beamed and rubbed her face against his neck

“Okay Masterrr~ I loff youu~” grunted embarrassed he scratching Claw favorite spot

“pft..lof you too” Soap mutters but a certain Lieutenant sensed that he make fun of

“you got a problem there Sergant?”

“Nope” a smug face plastered against his face, then Rudy cleared his throat didn’t want to break any of their light converses but he has to, cause Alejandro starting to tremble.....and know the reason why...

‘Claw’ Alejandro snapped from the daze and back to business

“ ...back to our talk, You can’t find him. No one knows who he is. But he’s everywhere” Claw eyes caught onto a large painting of a Virgin Mary with El Sin Nombre written on it

‘He? But that painting over there...a woman..hmm..’ then she saw a group of cats laying on the side of streets

An idea formed in her head.

.

The time passed they arrived at the place where Hassan had been reportedly spotted. Claw hopping out from the jeep followed Ghost and Soap as they circled up preparing her guns ready to back into action.

‘hmm...something off’ as she sniffs the air

“Master Ale, where are they holding Hassan?” the Colonel choked on his saliva so is Rudy, and the other Vaqueros who listen widen their eyes

“W-Wha –“

“That’s how she’ll be calling you all now, get used to it” Ghost piped up, something told Alejandro that he got the same treatment from her

“Oh..of course, White two-story building. Back of town” Claw nodded and rushed into the door both Ghost and Soap know that she now in her battle mode, and ears twitching tried to sense an enemy behind the door.

“they’ve been waiting for us, Masters”

“Good” Ghost nodded, Soap smile proudly at her as the Vaqueros stare at her in amazement

And then the battle begins.

Taglist: @lilpothoscuttings @kaoyamamegami

[alexbkrieger13]

I swear if this ballon d'or thing wasn't a joke P would've won in 2018 and 2020

Don't get me started that's a rent I could go on for several hours

[aliceliddell13]

Thanks for tagging me @thesolarangel

I don't know who to tag - so feel free to do the poll ^^

[outsidereveries]

in the ninth issue you have access to see..

itzy, health check: from what i can see, i pulled (unconsiously) 1 card for each member - i can feel that lia is definitely feeling the worst out of the rest (last card). i really don't want to burden my audience more or less, but it's certain that jype didn't lie how she's really feeling. i feel that the fourth card is possibly yuna; whoever that is, is feeling better rather than a while ago. the middle card imo is, i am assuming, yeji, and i am aware she's gemini sun. whether this is yeji or not, is also healing, possibly from practice or something, related to dancing/exercise(s), but overall, she's ok. the second card is chaeryeong, at least i believe that's her: she is also feeling great. if she had injury or was ill, she's feeling better. the first card is possibly ryujin, i see that she's training a lot more on herself, whether that's about her health or to gain some more muscles, or practicing. if her health was shaky, she's healthier now. i am certain where i saw chaeryeong and lia but i am unsure of the rest of them, but i don't think the difference is much - apart from lia, the rest are feeling great.

why the drama surrounding fifty fifty happened: basically someone got seriously greedy, and i don't think it's someone from the group at all but someone from one of these two companies, i personally believe they're from the givers. there's nothing much but the other side seems to have been through similar times and they're trying to not make the same mistake again. definitely behind the scenes issue.

how outsiders see selena's position surrounding the i-p* conflict: they don't care for some reason? i am not sure that i actually see mixed opinions. she got called out because of it, right? i do see that these opinions aren't actually the ones that are the main point of view from outsiders' side. i actually see that these people actually, idk, don't care. don't get me wrong, but the situation is incredibly complex, even more than the previous one between u-r^ in my opinion because it's more one-sided, like a lot more, and i thought that the first^ was one-sided, the current* is different breed where people are actually aware and when in the previous situation i could actually see the both sides, i cannot in the reoccuring conflict^. the outsiders simply don't care in which side selena is and even if part of them actually do, the rest of them are simply egoistic for not being aware of usa's doings. i do see their main opinion is quite ignorant about this situation and they love how selena says that she cannot change the world with a post. i would say that their opinion could be better but it's egoistical one, and for obvious reasons.

how m'bappe feels about messi winning his 8th ballon d'or: he was happy, to be honest. he isn't jelaous or envious, m'bappe seems to be happy to live in the same era with messi himself. kyllian is feeling that duty for what he's acomplished so far, and he is happy for messi. like, he's like a proud son/brother, similar feeling like that.

johnny nct, career until march 24': not as well as he might expect? he might prefer to renew with sme, and i see that some other people might want to leave.. that will lead his solo career to be stagnant, or even uncertain at some point. it will get better after everything is resolved. since they asked about acting career and overseas activities, the second one is more likely to happen as of now, tbh, but i don't think they'll be in his home country for now.

usa's elections for their next president and their influence after them: yet again, the americans seem to not have choice but "settle" for someone who's less bad. no, no, that's not how it works, americans, either vote for different person who isn't scandalous, or not vote at all and make the elections invalid. their next president might be someone who is still bad but not that bad, you know? i don't see biden, or feel him. i do feel trump and someone else who is way worse than trump. americans might be still dissatisfied that trump won again? i do see trump winning again as of now. i don't think there will be newbies, just familiar faces. the reason i think why trump will win as of now is that the people outside of usa will feel better and not as controlled as of now. unless if there will be a cataclysm where trump isn't candidates, i see trump winning. i don't see biden, but i do see trump. i also feel worse energy from democratic party's side.

blackpink, comeback in the end of 2024? or subunit of them?: since i asked before the group renewals, as of now, lisa seems to be strongly against it, like very strongly. there are unresolved issues between her and yge and unless yge give her these fucking money, she'll oppose. i do see travelling for the girls and important gigs which possibly are group ones but idk, up to that. i don't see subunit debut.

jaemin nct, 2024 career: he might leave sme atp, there's something going on behind the scenes. he'll be overwhelmed :(

what sme thinks of jaemin: very smart but also a person who knows their secrets. if jaemin told sme that he'll reveal everything, they might be afraid of him. also very hardworking person.

what type of scandal boynextdoor might have in the future?: i've heard about the drama about that security guard person. it's not about that. possibly difficulties between 2 of the members (water and fire sign?? big3 is possible too)' personalities. it can be made into bullying scandal, by the way, but it might turn into controversy too, i am not sure how it might turn out.

what red velvet think of "chill kill" era?: tbh they're satisfied, they like it.

what red velvet think of their disbandment rumors: very dissapointed atp, it won't happen!

katseye, overall success: seems to be guaranteed, can do very well for a western girl group with k-pop standarts. won't be very, very famous but it will be enough to be popular.

skz hyunjin, shinee taemin bond: VERY much work-related dynamics, and they match really well. outside of work though.. no. just no. not that they won't match, but it just doesn't exist.

i'll-it, success: not as what they've (belift, hybe) expected. small fanbase outside of south korea, local fandom might be a bit bigger, fans from r u next? are still MAD for how hybe rigged everything. i do see water energy girl standing out, possibly wonhee or youngseo, but it can be both girls tbh. just focus them on solo activities pls

i'll-it, concept: very similar to enhypen, seems to focus on empowerment. might be teen crush?

taylor swift, 2024 career: might be merging with her personal and love life. i do see viral moments, breaking record and similar things. i am unsure if she'll release something in 2024, but she has to be prepared as kelce might cheat on taylor. she might learn about the preparations on it in one way or another and she will try to stop him just for the sake of their popularity (individual, as couple, idqk). she might learn to be more aware of what she actually wants in 2024, she seems to be blind about that.

why treasure's hyunsuk is more scandalous these days: he seems to experiment with his vibe, aesthetics and style. he might've wanted to do it for a while. like, he's aware, but he isn't that sorry from what i see. he's just experimentinnnnng

will hyunsuk be more scandalous: i intepret it as no, he doesn't want to be more extreme.

*israel-palestine ^ukraine-russia

** there's no need to read this since this paragraph isn't related to my usual content. although i do not stand with israel's side, my content that's provided here is directed only to divination-related readings and it will stay this way. personally i agree with selena that a post, or even threads on social medias won't change anything and although taking a side might be nice if we are aware of the conflict in question (doesn't matter which), i personally believe only mass protests for indefinite time will make actual impact, unless if they're restricted by more influental people. (that's to sofia's ex-mayor btw :)) my country has problems that are in the dust for the most of its citizens and we don't look through them. how tf we have to be aware of other issues and conflicts when we aren't aware of our owns? that's issue between israel and palestine. my country and people have no place in this. i really try to support palestinians with what i can, but to take a side? i never chose ukraine or russia. i won't choose israel or palestine either. i do hate some of the countries' laws and so on, but i will stay as neutral as i can. these issues aren't bulgaria's. sorry for this ted talk but i felt it's needed. **

[welp-back-on-my-bs]

:p wedding flowers because idk why but I love doing the research into them and imedeately forget XD, but I do also get alot of differnt meanings for them too- but it's all good :>

William: Marigolds, power, strength, qnd light that lives within a person

Liam: Ballon Flower, honestly and endless love

Harrison: Begonia, gratitude, uniqueness, and caution

Elbert: Alyssums, worth beyond beauty

Alfons: Hyacinth, games, sport, and play

Rodger: Bee Balm, protection and prosperity

Jude: Rose, love, Royalty, sensuality, sensuality, secrety, and mysticism

Ellis: Yellow Tulips, happiness

Victor: Forget-Me-Not, true love

[secretbossesacrossthemultiverse]

Mylar Ice

Hp: 770 Object: Expired Birthday Coupon. Found In: ICE-E'S P"e"zza Darkworld. (The FunLand). Specifically, under the Village. (under the tables.) Origins: Mylar was a Globero within FunLand. He loved giving away the ballons he kept within his belly-drawer. He was never any close to the Darkworld's leader, but he liked his place in the world. Despite his love for giving and helping others, he didn't have many friends. Soon, his time was coming up, and soon he would be too old to work... he would be replaced... That's when a strange somebody came to him. It is unknown what was said to Mylar, but it drove him insane. He declared himself a "hero" who must "liberate the masses". One day, he just... vanished...

His replacement, Vinyl claims she can hear strange sounds from under her house... like surging and laughter. Reason for eventually attacking Kris: They believe the only way to save their world is to destroy the SOUL, but they know they need to get STRONGER first... and the SOUL should be curious enough to help them... Based on any Undertale Characters: Not really. SOUL MODE: Purple. Spare Method: Inflating his head until it pops.

[hardersson-stuff]

P has Lower rating cause she’s from Denmark relatively small footballing nation. Deserves hella more rating but she is literally the highest rated danish player male or female 👀. I’m waiting for her 90+ card so long man or evolution. She has the 87 player of the week but we also deserve a brilliant P card hopefully ea gets corrected but truly shame 😢. As someone who loves the game completely disappointed with not having a decent card for my favorite player who truly deserves it and is goated already 🤌.

This 💯. Couldn’t agree more. It’s just about publicity/ draw/ fame with these ratings. Otherwise could someone explain why injured players like Putellas are the highest rated female players for 2024 (2022/2023 she was recovering from her ACL and virtually didn’t have any playing time….).

It’s the same with international awards… it’s mostly appointed to the most famous and well known players. There is no other logical explanation why players like Alex Morgan who are past her prime were in the running for Ballon d’Or last year (like she barely made the US roster…).

Not disrespecting any players because they are/ were great players but make it make sense with these ratings/ awards. Ratings/ awards shouldn’t be handed out for former achievements or popularity.