#Or re-grown might be the better term

[charlietheepicwriter7]

Talia found Yasmin's hide out only two days after the bomb.

It wasn't easy. Yasmin had hidden herself well - her monthly reports had never mentioned an acquaintanceship with Vladimir Masters, the absolute gall of that girl - in the middle of nowhere Wisconsin. She bypassed the few security measures with ease, eventually finding her daughter sitting at a kitchen table, hyperventilating.

"What happened?" Talia's voice was cold and demanding.

"The-" Yasmin gasped before stealing herself. "The Fentons are dead."

"I know the Fentons are dead." Talia circled the girl. "One split navel to throat, the other strangled. What. Happened?"

"The Fentons discovered their son was a Meta. Specifically, they thought he had been replaced with the extradimentional species they study." She took a deep breath. "By the time I had discovered their actions, Daniel was... dissected on a table."

Talia closed her eyes. She knew from Yasmin's reports that she'd been acting as the Fenton child's primary caretaker since her adoption and a fondness had developed. "Yasmin-"

"Don't, Mother." She snapped. "Don't act like this is anything less than a tragedy."

"I know-"

"He was a child-"

"Everything's been taken care of," Talia said. "As far as the authorities are concerned, Jasmine Fenton died in that explosion you caused. You need to return now-"

"No!" Yasmin bolted to her feet, glaring at Talia. "He's dead, Mother! An innocent child, the child I raised as my own, is dead because I couldn't protect him! Don't you dare try to sweep this under the rug like... like Danny was something shameful! I'm not leaving! I have to-"

Time Out.

Yasmin shut her mouth mid-sentence, giving Talia time to convince her off her self-destructive path.

"What happened to Daniel is a tragedy, Yasmin. But wallowing in grief and what-ifs only leads to further pain." Talia sighed. "The Fentons and the research you were so fascinated with are gone now. You made sure of that. It's time for you to return home and put that knowledge to use."

Yasmin stared down at her hands. Odd that Talia hadn't noticed, but Yasmin's hands cradled a small, dark blue jewel, polished into a smooth, oblong oval. It glittered under the candlelight, like stars in the sky.

Yasmin swallowed the rock and spoke, refusing to acknowledge what she'd just done. "You are right, Mother. The time of Jasmine Fenton is gone now." She stared straight at Talia, no trace of fear in her gaze. For a moment, Talia wondered where her child had gone. Yasmin never met her eyes unless prompted to when she was growing up. Now she was met with a younger version of herself with cheap dyed-red hair, with the same level of determination that made Talia the Right Hand of the Demon Head. "I will mourn for Danny... on my own time. For now, what is my mission?"

Talia studied her daughter. There was a reason why she'd hidden the girl so far out of the way of her Father and her son. Yasmin was a strong fighter, but had her father's heart, despite her willingness to kill. She'd always reminded Talia of a bodyguard rather than an assassin, but Yasmin wanted to go her own way, wanted to study everything. For years, Talia had indulged her daughter, but now it was time for her to return to the fold.

"For the next month, you will be training to remove any weakness the Fentons may have left in you. After that, you will be guarding an ally for me."

"Which ally?"

"A boy a few years older than you, a son of the Bat." Yasmin didn't react to the mention of her father. Good. "His mind is infirm, but by the time you finish your training, he will be ready to strike a blow against Gotham. You will act as his guard during his training and act as my spy while he's in Gotham. Do you understand?"

For a moment, Yasmin's hand brushed her stomach before she forced her fists to her sides. "Yes, Mother. I will do as you ask."

[wannab-urs]

Pedro Pascal Character Fic Recs | Vol 42

AO3 | Kofi | Main Masterlist | The Spreadsheet Masterlist

Howdy Folks,

guess who's back! I don't know if I'm back to doing these consistently, but I have a hell of a list for y'all. Tags and summaries provided by the author, commentary provided by yours truly.

Mindfuck - Dave one shot by @whatsnewalycat

He said he could rattle the bees from your buzzing honeycomb brain. All you had to do was trust him with this power. So you did. And you do. Your valiant beekeeper meets you at this hotel every other Tuesday night, except on holidays.

Hypnotism, hypnosis-kink, Imperfect Praxis of Hypnosis, Humiliation, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Praise Kink, Smut, unprotected piv, D/s dynamic, Dom Dave, Mindfuck

One of the weirdest things I've ever read, but also one of the best. I was super into this. Mindfucking is WILD.... I'd read more of this universe in a heartbeat

Bittersweet Love - Dieter one shot by @ozarkthedog

Dieter is in recovery from drug addiction, the disease that cost him you. This is his first premiere after getting clean and his first one without you.

angst but with a happy ending! mentions of drug use and alcohol but nothing graphic.

This is such a sweet fic? That might be a weird way to describe it. I just love Dieter getting his shit together and all the good coming his way because of it.

Starlet - Dieter one shot by @whocaresstillthelouvre

Your husband has a big movie premiere, sure he looks great, but his co-star looks even better.

PWP, threesome, smut, fingering, oral (f receiving), lesbian fun, unprotected p in v sex, cum eating, addiction talk, sober Dieter, Kit Kats, I wrote this for the bi girls.

This fic is a dream, seriously. I want a hot movie star husband to bring pretty movie star women into my bed please and thank you.

Pas de Deux - Din series by @burntheedges

When Din Djarin – principal dancer at Concordia Ballet Company and generational talent in the classical style – suddenly left CBC and joined the Nevarro Ballet Theater mid-season, it shocked the ballet world. You never would have guessed that he would change your life, too.

modern AU, ballet AU, fluff, angst, flirting, dancing, lots of ballet terms (I’ll define things/link videos/etc. -- see below), misunderstandings, character study, romance, pet names (sweetheart, beautiful), lots of tension, later: smut, kissing, grinding, fingering, p-in-v sex, creampie, each chapter will have its own tags, Din lifts reader (see note below about reader)

This is one of the few modern Din AUs I've read, as I tend not to like them, but I can't recommend this enough. I was drawn in by the summary and hooked by the first chapter!

Never Let Me Go - Ezra one shot by @yopossum

Loving, reverent domestic smut with sweet, submissive Ezra.

SMUT; no plot that’s it just porn but with FEELINGS; sub!Ezra; established relationship; super duper in love; domestic fluff; comfort; gratuitous pet names; praise kink; body worship; body hair; grinding; breast and nipple play; teasing/edging if you squint; light bondage; riding; PIV; no condom (there’s come y’all); religious language and imagery as literary device; Ezra the human thesaurus; prose gettin purple; making grown men whine and cry; reader is not gendered, has breasts and a vulva/vagina, is described as having puffed nipples and dimpled thighs, can straddle Ezra, but no coloring, size, appearance, age, or ability is otherwise noted; Ezra is an amputee and healed and we love it (no gore or trauma or background re: his arm); but I did write this because I was watching Prospect without actually watching and was inspired by *~*those sounds*~* out of context tho; Beatrice is not reader’s name, just a nerdy Dante reference; I stole this title from Florence Welch; old person on tumblr; is this spacing wack?; not a beta in sight; 18+ only no minors

SUBMISSIVE EZRA!!! I loved this. Such a gorgeous fic.

Stick Buddies - Frankie series by @auteurdelabre

You and Frankie find yourselves in a complicated situation when invited to Benny's wedding for a week in Mexico. Despite your strained friendship, you both pretend to be a couple to save Frankie embarrassment when seeing his recently engaged ex wife. However as you navigate through this charade, old feelings and unresolved issues resurface.

friends to enemies, angst, fake relationship, bickering, there's only one bed, destination weddings, enemies to lovers, jealousy, idiots in love, revealed secrets, mutual pining, smut, HEA, so many fucking tropes.

friends to enemies to lovers??? Sign me the fuck up.

Where You Left Me - Frankie one shot by @chaotic-mystery

You meet Frankie for a date and reminisce about your relationship.

MAJOR character death. No movie AU but fuck Tom. This is overall angst heavy and please take care of yourself. Grief & loss, sadness, memories, I think that’s it? It’s just overall a bittersweet and tragically lovesick story. There’s no physical descriptions of reader other than wearing a black dress at one point and having hair that tickles Frankie’s nose. no y/n used

This shit made me cry in the best way. Please read this.

One of Your Girls - Frankie one shot by @pedropeach

unpacking some of frankie's old things leads to a revelation about his past. (OR to put it simply: frankie morales x triple frontier boys circle jerk)

Circle Jerk, Sub!Frankie, Bukkake, Facials, Cumplay, Cum Swallowing, frankie is literally a cum dumpster (and loves it), Praise Kink, Pet Names, Dirty Talk, oral (m receiving), Deepthroating, Cock Worship, Use of restraints, Sexy Photographs, Sharing, brief mentions of anal sex (m/m), for story purposes you are frankie's current gf, frankie x all the guys individually, this includes tom but he's not part of the circle jerk, sry tom

Really was not expecting this to be as tender and soft and sweet as it is considering it's one of the more filthy things I've ever read. Absolutely love it.

I'll Carry You - Javi P series by @almostfoxglove

You reunite with your childhood best friend when he arrives home from Colombia. Javier's sudden return to your life exhumes buried heartbreak, but he longs to set things right.

Eventual smut. Reference to canon-typical violence, injury, and the death of a parent. Plenty of alcohol consumption, yearning, and angst. YEARNING!!!

The yearning is exquisite. The fic is exquisite. I'm in love with this fic

Remorse for Remedy - Joel series by @pedgito

Alone, the Miller's brothers seem like your only hope. The outbreak is still fresh, weeks after the fall and all that matters is survival and the unlikely comfort that comes along with a man who wants nothing to do with you.

early outbreak, canon typical violence, morally grey!joel, smut (warnings given with each chapters), exploration of kinks, enemies to lovers, age gap (early 20s/mid 30s), unhealthy coping mechanisms, detailed warning with each chapter

I haven't ever read a series about Joel immediately post outbreak, which is wild. It's always raider!joel or qz!joel or jackson!joel. I love this new perspective and I'm so excited to read more.

Biology - Joel one shot by @endlessthxxghts

Joel hurt his back at work, so you've been helping him around the house until he heals.

able-bodied, female sex anatomy, and inherently fem!reader. No description of reader, everything is neutral (ex. “your bottoms,” “the curve of you” — nothing is specific in the way “you” are described). Age gap (reader early 20s, Joel in 50s). EXPLICIT MATERIAL PRESENT. HEED THE WARNINGS. WEIRD boundaries are crossed…you're not blood-related to Joel, but you were raised like you were. You call him “uncle.” Pet names (baby, darlin’, sweetheart, etc.). Pussy pronouns (she). Innocent touches until it isn't. Sexual tension galore. Slight dub-con. Icky Joel. Icky reader. Pussy grinding. Dirty talk. Slight degradation (“bitch” is used only once). Multiple orgasms. P in V unprotected. Reader is on top. Lots of teasing about the nature of yours and Joel’s relationship.

Well slap me silly and call me an uncle fucker because this fic was amazing. (they're not really related don't. look. at. ME.)

The Savage and the Sanctuary - Joel series by @justagalwhowrites

After the death of his daughter, Joel Miller fell apart. But when searching for answers at the bottom of a bottle and within his own rage doesn't fix it, he resigns himself to working for his brother in private security. It's a job that starts him down the path to stability and a semblance of a life, even if it's not one he particularly wants. At least it does until you show up. The biggest movie star in the world with your newly adopted niece in tow, you throw everything about Joel's life into flux. Is he capable of letting himself feel something again while protecting the only things left in the world that matter?

Protective Joel, Ellie & Joel Bonding, Joel is Bad at Feelings, POV Joel, Joel Needs a Hug, Alternate Universe - No Cordyceps Outbreak, Enemies to Lovers, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Slow Burn

So pumped for a new Kit fic. Super into bodyguard Joel. The angst right out the gate is so beautifully painful, I just know I'm gonna cry once a chapter at least. (i've only read one chapter, so I have some catching up to do!)

Professor's Pet - Joel one shot by @chaotic-mystery

Professor Miller wants you to teach the class tomorrow morning & you need help being less nervous. What if he’s the reason you’re nervous, though?

Age gap but not specified, power imbalance (professor x TA, reader stutters when nervous, academic weapon, teasing, fingering, one (1) pair of panties ripped to shreds, oral (f receiving), spitting, pussy slaps, praise kink, name calling (good girl, sweetheart, baby, smart girl), dirty talk, talking you through it, spanking, condescending a little bit, cum eating, face riding, nasty freaky kisses to share your cum, no use of y/n

I cannot begin to explain how hot him helping her practice is. And then the smut.... I need a shower

Call It What It Is - Joel one shot by @joelsgreys

A disagreement over patrol duty leads to declarations that have been long overdue.

JACKSON ERA JOEL. established relationship. HEFTY AGE GAP (reader is in her 20’s and joel is 56). ellie and joel are fine bc i said so and they deserve nothing less. reader handles a rifle, joel’s a little too overprotective and almost seems controlling, but i promise he is not. well, maybe just a smidge. arguing, admission of feelings, joel miller says i love you (yes this is ooc, no i do not care bc i need this old man to tell me he loves me). angst, fluff. quite a bit of side character interaction before we get to joel and reader in the second half. the only physical description of reader is that she is shorter than joel.

We love overprotective Joel in this house

The Guard Dog - Pero Tovar one shot by @avastrasposts

Sent to your uncle's bleak castle in the north of England, you expect only a dreary existence until you meet his groundskeeper, a scarred, frightening Spaniard. But love in the Victorian era is not easy and life doesn't follow straight paths.

this is mainly all fluff with a bit of angst. Some of that casual racism and predjudice of the period rears its ugly head though. I've tried to keep the reader as blank as possible, but it's Victorian England and she's a lady so I have to presume she doesn't speak Spanish and has fair skin. No use of y/n.

This was so beautiful. I love the setting, I love the characterization, I love the story

Bloody Kisses - Tim Rockford/Dio series by @perotovar

shane has been in denial about himself for a while. newly single and with the help of one of his favorite singers, he opens his eyes to a new venture he could possibly take: the cop he sees on a semi-regular basis, detective tim rockford.

takes place in the early 00s, age gap (shane is 23, tim is 40), internalized homophobia, hurtful names (fairy boy, faggot, queer as a slur, etc), a gay porn magazine, lots of references to peter steele of type o negative (and his playgirl issue), male masturbation, acab, angst, protected p in a, fingering, excessive amounts of lube

I started reading this a while ago, but I never added it to the spreadsheet. I'm in love with how soft Tim is with Dio UgH

In the shadows of others, we grow - Tim Rockford/Dave York series by @sin-djarin

What happens when you put two different areas of law enforcement in the same room a few times a year to atone for their 'sins'? You find common ground and figure it out. Together.

M/M, Established D/s dynamics, each chapter contains individual warnings.

This pairing?? Obsessed. The feelings?!?!? Give me 14 more fics in this universe PLEASE

An End to Drought - Javi P one shot by @almostfoxglove

The future of your family's homestead hangs in the balance as Javier Peña comes home in the middle of a drought.

Javier Peña Smut, Soft Javier Peña, Sweet Javier Peña, Javier Peña Has a Big Dick, Smut, Fluff and Smut, Fluff, Neighbors,Javier might be a god? who knows!, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Porn with Feelings, Penis In Vagina Sex, Oral Sex, Creampie, Sex, Vaginal Sex, unprotected piv, Freyr, References to Norse Religion & Lore, Post Season 3

I'm obsessed with the way the challenge was interpreted. Is Javi a god? We don't know... but he sure fucks like one.

Some shit I wrote:

Make it Hurt - Logan Howlett x f!mutant!reader - sparring + pain kink

Morning Ride - Logan Howlett x f!reader - soft morning sex

You're So Dark - Dave York x f!reader - prof!Dave x student!Reader

[doevademe]

Hi! Been re-reading some of your future-fic oneshots. I'm just curious to ask: considering Nico as someone tired and settling for Will and canon Will (uhm, the fandom writes him well sometimes), what do you think would be the last straw (for either of them, or both) for a solangelo break-up? Is it possible even with only a very minor (or none at all) intervention from Percy?

Would love to hear your thoughts!

Okay, let's do a deep dive into Will and Nico and their relationship, and how, as they are written, they are already doomed as a couple.

However, if you want the TL;DR: Nico and Will are incompatible from a fundamental level. Their personalities and hobbies require way too much compromise to work together. In my future fics, Percy just sped up the inevitable. There's is no one "last straw" as there is an ever increasing pressure that eventually becomes unsustainable.

First, let's look at the dynamic they develop from their first on-screen interaction in BoO: Will nags Nico, tells him he's wrong about his own feelings of isolation and loneliness, and proceeds to basically gaslight him that people never shunned him and he did it to himself. Nico, who has been alone for so long, takes this as a show of concern and affection, and develops an infatuation with Will.

Fast forward to ToA, and it's more of the same. Nico is gloomy, or sarcastic, or a bit morbid, and Will is bothered by it. He's bothered by who Nico is, and decides to "fix him". Nico, meanwhile has grown dependent on Will as his other relationships grow distant (Percy, Hazel, Reyna, and even Hades), and begins feeling jealous of Will even touching others. Needless to say, that's a very toxic basis for a romantic relationship.

When tsats comes around, we get the relationship at its worst. The very first scene is Nico saying he is into fictional bad boys, and Will being disappointed in him. We see that Nico is now watching his every word, glancing constantly at Will to make sure it doesn't displease him, and Will is happier that Nico is "better", though worried he might relapse, lose him to "the darkness" inside him.

Will in tsats is just the worst. He's useless on the quest, he tries to make Nico turn his back on the Underworld (the closest thing he has to a home), he whines, and he simps for Persephone while his boyfriend is right there. Some of it is an intentional flaw, but most of it we're meant to read as romantic and genuinely "sweet".

At the end, Will "learns" that he needs to accept that Nico will always have some darkness in him, and he just needs to "shine brighter" for them both. This doesn't really solve their problems as a couple: They have very little in common, Nico's too dependent on Will and has isolated himself from family and friends, and Will's newfound "acceptance" is tied to seeing Nico as inherently negative.

This relationship is simply not sustainable in the short or long-term, and eventually it will give. Either Will gets tired of having Nico around disrupting his sunny energy, or Nico lashes out over being "the problem" Will has so graciously decided to burden himself with.

A break-up is not only inevitable, it's the healthiest thing either of them can do. People would say to try couple's therapy, but therapy can't make people suddenly like hobbies or personality traits they find repellent. Will is in love with the idea of a "fixed" Nico, and Nico is in love with the idea of a boy that likes and fights for him.

The break-up catalyst can be anything: One nag too far from Will, Nico doing a morbid joke too many, just waking up one day and realizing they were never really in love. Either way, it's not a matter of how, of whether Percy is there or not, it's a matter of when. When does it become too much for them to keep pretending they want the same thing out of this relationship.

[barrenclan]

I was about to say ‘maybe Malmo would suit Barrenclan’ but uh Rainhaze isn’t looking too hot and youch

ANYWAYS I think the song Malmo by Moon might suit Barrenclan as I mentioned before, specifically the popular part (it’s always the popular part)

Three of us sleep next to three others

(Not sure who it’d match)

It's hot and we rot in this oven

(referring to Barrenclan’s environment)

Now there's something about the language

(followed by next part, but maybe Rainhaze about the welcoming of death or injury in Defiance)

Something about these people

(Pinepaw with the new scar or maybe Corm or maybe Rain. I think they could all decently match??)

That look an awful lot like me

(Same as before, Pinepaw with the new scar or maybe Corm or maybe Rain. maybe even talking about Slug right now too)

I'm surprisingly accepting of this discomfort

(Why I said Rain is at this point (right before death but close enough) is because he didn’t seem to mind it anymore)

But I'm not trying to be much of a person right now

(don’t know)

I'm just trying to get some sleep

(Pine with the nightmares and now grief. also with the shock.)

Not sure if these actually match but they seem close enough and I’m very tired anyways OH MY RAIN HOLY BDDBXBBBDB

Wow, Paul Dano is in this band? That's cool. I like your analysis of the lyrics!

Why it's an absolute classic! In terms of characters I think it fits Deepdark a bit better than Rainhaze, though.

Do I even need the lyrics for I Can't Decide?

ANOTHER classic! I like this one sort of swapping off between Slugpelt and Rainhaze, where he's trying to get her to come back to him in their youth, but now it's flipped the other way.

Achilles, Achilles, Achilles, come down Won't you get up off, get up off the roof? You're scaring us and all of us, some of us love you

The self is not so weightless, nor whole and unbroken Remember the pact of our youth Where you go, I'm going, so jump and I'm jumping Since there is no me without you

This one's been suggested a couple times, but I still really like it with Slugpelt, so here it is again.

I don't this it has! Ah, I recognize it from IncuriousCat, of course. They're very popular on this blog it seems. Rainhaze is a good character for song about making bad deals.

I'ma make a deal with the bad wolf So the bad wolf don't bite no more

My enemy is a friend of mine in a friendly place to be seen, hey You know I'll run away for a couple years just to prove I've never been free

Has Ride the Cyclone has a re-emergence? I feel like I've seen it a lot lately. It's nice to have a song with old BarrenClan anyways, before all the tragedy and drama.

What the world needs Is people like me To keep it all spinning around I'm the mover, I'm the shaker, I'm the headline-maker

He put it into words, and it's plain to see We need a little less of them A little more of me!

Yeah, I think you could chuck this in a Rainhazeward direction!

All this time, I've felt like my time to go would arrive That it can't last forever; I've been decaying Moldy scaffolding, ritual strangling No matter what I try, I seem to stay alive

My body should be cold The eyes of maggots gazing through to my soul I left so long ago Behind me are the tears I couldn't control

HOORAY! I'm a big Pink Floyd fan. It'd be so cool to see a "Trial" scene with him as Pink and all the other characters as the other roles.

Day after day, the love turns gray Like the skin of a dying man And night after night, we pretend it's all right But I have grown older, and you have grown colder And nothing is very much fun any more

Oooh, Bauhaus! Also a big fan of them. That's a good alternate voice claim for Deepdark, too.

Thank you, it is! I'm always taking more song asks, of which I have got quite a few. I'm glad you like the comic!

May you die wide awake With a look of great surprise May your eyes be taken just Before you can weep As you see what you stole stolen from you <- yuuuup rainhaze

Aww, that makes me sad. But it does fit well with them.

I dreamt I found you hanging I didn't know what it meant Your eyes would follow me through Everywhere I went

The window on the fifth floor Shattered as you wept What am I witnessing? What stories have you kept?

Damn ran outta links, I thought I got it this time

[katyspersonal]

*wakes up at 3 AM* Girl help, I forgot to pay attention at the fact that the portrait of the "green" person in Debate Parlour is not likely to be Sellen, from logical standpoint

It already was on the back of my mind, but I want to actually look into it! They are implied to be founders/teachers, and we know Sellen was a student of Azur and Lusat, but this is not quite an arguement, yeah. Sometimes new teachers will rise from younger people that once were scholars in institution! But it is the fact that keeping the portrait of that despicable, outlaw person that shook the whole Academy with her deeds would be strange. Why honor her?

+ And speaking of which, I thought the first two portraits could have been Azur and Lusat, but maybe also not? Their study of Primeval Current did not work well with the new Raya Lucaria agenda after Rennala took over, nor anyone who accomplished a lot ever got status and uniforms like they did! Portraits might be.... well, Karolos and Olivinus, lol. The guys crowns are named after. So, more convenient guys chosen to "repost with credit to the original artist" and become faces (literally lol) of Comets and Stars studies respectively!

^ The puppet body Sellen uses also has the Witch Crown, and not a broken one! So, not likely a replica, but another student from whatever the 'Witch' school was!

The significance of green glintstone is strange too, because this is not something that exists normally! They are cold colors, like cyan, blue and indigo! Well, also "superior" amber stars, but they're a whole material of Elden Ring, not sorceries. Crystals from the mines could be green though, and those poisonous stones the miners throw at you are green too. 🤔 My guess on what 'Witch' school represented would be, exploring how the cosmic essence interacts and adapts with "our" ground and lifeforms! In other words, how to bring the cosmos IN earthly realities and make it all closer to the stars. Not waiting for the comets and star shards to fall down on people, but (re)create them right here in some capacity! Color green symbolizes these more earthly, "lab grown" glintstones (that aren't even really glintstones but rather crystals)! + potential connection with Miranda flowers, who do rain sort of cosmic showers as an attack but are adaptive to their environment in terms of abilities and element!

And, nobody until Sellen did something as drastic as trying to turn PEOPLE into stars.

I think also the school was not entirely cancelled because of Sellen (again, why still acknowledging it with the founder portrait then?). But more likely it became unpopular and there just aren't any more people that we know of to wear the Witch crowns, besides Sellen and whatever scholar Seluvis was holding as a puppet. Maybe there are more somewhere outside that ran away kinda like how Thops did! Maybe the school was already going extinct because "why do we need stars to modify earthly life if we already have Golden Grace + Moon is already a better bridge between mortal and divine 🌛" after Rennala married Radagon. Lazuli conspectus sort of overshadowed Witch school, it was a more advanced offering for the similar demand! 'Witches' to Lazuli conspectus are like traditional art to digital art; both are valid but one of these quickly gained popularity and unfairly accused another one of being outdated and not marketable gghghfjghj

[detransdamnation]

This month of October is my detransiversary… or at least, I think it is. I’m always all brain-fogged around this time of year. Still weird to think I’ve actually forgotten when, exactly, I threw in the towel. It’s always the things you say you’ll never forget that slip through your fingers so seamlessly, you don’t even notice. How fallible even the landmarks are.

Either way, it’s officially been three years since I last took my hormones. And just typing that out was enough to reduce me to tears.

Thoughts of what I could say on this have been swimming in my head for a while. I know how influencer-y that sounds. But writing into the void helps me cope—in case the chronic word vomit splattered all over my archive weren’t enough of a hint—and I feel frustrated because lately, every time I try to find a way to describe what it has been like to be me, even within the context of Word documents no one else will ever see, that normally-innate ability of mine to get it all out on a page just… eviscerates.

Up until now, at least. Kind of, sort of. I’m jumping at the opportunity because it took over a year to finally show itself.

Despite what my absence here—and this post—probably insinuates, I’ve been doing better than bad overall. But I’ve also been carrying this crushing weight that no matter how good I feel, it will never be good enough for me to not feel dysphoric, or sad, or filled with regrets—and somehow, this has only gotten harder, as opposed to easier, for me to reconcile as time goes on. I don’t think I was wrong to have been at least a little optimistic that maybe things would get better overtime. Guess I’ve learned yet another lesson.

Things haven’t gotten better. All the pain still remains. I do deal with that pain better—but I’m also not one to believe that being able to say “I’m used to it” is a sign of true genuine progress. If I think too hard about the state of things, I can feel the reopening of that wound in the pit of my stomach. It makes me nauseous and afraid. I will shake until I can barely feel my body and yet no other time will I be so painfully conscious of it. My dysphoria has evolved to mean more than merely just “wanting to be the opposite sex,” an evolution so major I almost question if “dysphoria” would be the correct term to describe what I feel sometimes. Regardless, it somehow feels even more sinister when I think too hard about it. There are the rare times I’m actually kind of okay sitting with the idea of just existing as I am… and then I re-remember how most of the physical effects of my hormones never really did subside, not to the extent most people would notice, and I start to long for what I had before the fix that fucked me up.

Except I didn’t “have” anything. I was a child when I started my transition. That childhood self is the only semblance of a “before” I will ever have. I will never know who or what I could have grown into without all this. Though a large part of me thinks it wouldn’t have mattered because detrans or not, I’m certainly something… and I’m not proud of it. No one would be. No one is. And I hate that I still crave that approval from others because it was part of what drove me to transition as that godforsaken teenager. In that respect, I don’t think I’ve grown at all. It makes me wonder how much I would put up with just to feel loved. I’ve already seen how far I will go. I didn’t re-make the mistake of viewing detransition as the antidote to all my troubles, but it’s times like these I wonder… maybe detransition itself is just another ugly representation of a cycle I have found sick comfort in, no hope of getting out. Maybe I will forever be chasing unattainable wishes all to spend years thereafter missing what never was, when I once spent years dedicated to ensuring what could have been would never ever become.

And I will feel disgusted with it. I might even look down upon others who go down the same path, when I’m in my worst of states. But the most I will ever do to “help” myself is pour my heart out onto a page—and I put “help” in quotations because sure, I’m getting all off my chest, but at the end of the day, I’m still sitting on my ass straining my neck to soak up the blue light. I’ve come to pride myself on my introspection, but rarely do I ever feel motivated enough to use that introspection as motivation to actually do something good. It seems all my major life changes present themselves in the form of “snaps,” some sort of external trigger leading to action that’s almost impulsive… and then I just get used to whatever sort of muck I land myself in until the next snap comes along and inspires me to pull myself out. And I will feel disgusted with how long it took me to finally value myself. I’ll pour my heart out and then shrug my shoulders. It’ll happen again. I know it.

But this won’t be news to anyone who’s been here for a while and that’s one of the main reasons why my page has been marred by distance. I feel like I’ve already, by and large, said everything I could say re: detransition, how it concerns me and my experience, specifically. It feels pointless to keep beating a dead horse, especially online. I used to humour how I’d keep on doing it, anyway… I don’t regret it—I needed that release—but the thought of continuing just feels different now. I guess if I had to analogize it, I’d use the acceptance phase of grief. It’s my reality, but I can’t change it any more than I already have—and there comes a point where talking is only dwelling…

…or inciting controversy, which I feel like I do just by existing. That’s a self-centered way to phrase it, and fairly, it stems from a perspective just as much—but it is what I feel and it is the prevailing reason why I have fallen into such a funk. I’ve almost come to consider the very word “detrans” to be an oxymoron I use only since there’s not really any other term that accurately encapsulates this experience. But that’s a long story. I share its conclusion only so that maybe someone else who feels the same way may come across this and know they aren’t alone in feeling it. That’s ultimately why I made this blog and keep on coming back: connection. And in the case there is nothing to connect over, understanding.

It felt so good to get into this flow state again. I hope they will soon be as fruitful as they used to be.

[daitheflu-mx]

“The Menorah,” by Theodor Herzl

(Published in Die welt, December 31, 1897)

ONCE THERE was a man who deep in his soul felt the need to be a Jew. His material circumstances were satisfactory enough. He was making an adequate living and was fortunate to have a vocation in which he could create according to the impulses of his heart. You see, he was an artist. He had long ceased to trouble his head about his Jewish origin or the faith of his fathers, when the age-old hatred re-asserted itself under a fashionable slogan. Like many others, our man, too, believed that this movement would soon subside. But instead of getting better, it got worse. Although he was not personally affected by them, the attacks pained him anew each time. Gradually his soul became one bleeding wound.

This secret psychic torment had the effect of steering him to its source, namely, his Jewishness, with the result that he experienced a change that he might never have in better days, because he had become so alienated: He began to love Judaism with great fervor. At first he did not fully acknowledge this mysterious affection, but finally it grew so powerful that his vague feelings crystallized into a clear idea to which he gave voice: The thought that there was only one way out of this Jewish suffering — namely, to return to Judaism.

When his best friends, whose situation was similar to his, found out about this, they shook their heads and thought he had gone out of his mind. How could something that only meant an intensification and deepening of the malady be a remedy? He, on the other hand, thought that the moral distress of modern Jews was so acute because they had lost the spiritual counterpoise which our strong forefathers had possessed. People ridiculed him behind his back. Some even laughed right in his face. But he did not let the silly remarks of people whose judgment he had never before had occasion to value throw him off his course, and he bore their malicious or good-natured jests with equanimity. And since his behavior was not otherwise irrational, people eventually left him to his whim, although some used a stronger term, idee fixe, to describe it.

In his patient way, our man displayed the courage of his conviction over and over again. There were a number of changes which he himself found hard to accept, although he was stubborn enough not to let on. As a man and an artist of modern sensibilities, he was deeply rooted in many non-Jewish customs, and he had absorbed ineradicable elements from the cultures of the nations among which his intellectual pursuits had taken him. How was this to be reconciled with his return to Judaism? This gave rise to many doubts in his own mind about the soundness of his guiding idea, his idee maitresse, as a French thinker has called it. Perhaps the generation that had grown up under the influence of other cultures was no longer capable of that return which he had discovered as the solution. But the next generation, provided it were given the right guidance early enough, would be able to do so. He therefore tried to make sure that his own children, at least, would be shown the right way. He was going to give them a Jewish education from the very beginning.

In previous years he had let the festival which for centuries had illuminated the marvel of the Maccabees with the glow of candles pass by unobserved. Now, however, he used it as an occasion to provide his children with a beautiful memory for the future. An attachment to the ancient nation was to be instilled early in these young souls. A menorah was acquired, and when he held this nine-branched candelabrum in his hands for the first time, a strange mood came over him. In his remote youth, in his father’s house, such little lights had burned and there was something intimate and homelike about the holiday. This tradition did not seem chill or dead. The custom of kindling one light with another had been passed on through the ages.

The ancient form of the menorah also gave him food for thought. When had the primitive structure of this candelabrum first been devised? Obviously, its form had originally been derived from that of a tree: The sturdy stem in the center; four branches to the right and four to the left, each below the other, each pair on the same level, yet all reaching the same height. A later symbolism added a ninth, shorter branch which jutted out in front and was called the shamash or servant. With what mystery had this simple artistic form, taken from nature, been endowed by successive generations? And our friend, who was, after all, an artist, wondered whether it would not be possible to infuse new life into the rigid form of the menorah, to water its roots like those of a tree. The very sound of the name, which he now pronounced in front of his children every evening, gave him pleasure. Its sound was especially lovely when it came from the mouth of a child.

The first candle was lit and the origin of the holiday was retold: the miracle of the little lamp which had burned so much longer than expected, as well as the story of the return from the Babylonian exile, of the Second Temple, of the Maccabees. Our friend told his children all he knew. It was not much but for them it was enough. When the second candle was lit, they repeated what he had told them. And although they had learned it all from him, it seemed to him quite new and beautiful. In the days that followed he could hardly wait for the evenings, which became ever brighter. Candle after candle was lit in the menorah, and together with his children, the father mused upon the little lights. At length his reveries became more than he could or would tell them, for his dreams would have been beyond their understanding.

When he had resolved to return to the ancient fold and openly acknowledge his return, he had only intended to do what he considered honorable and sensible. But he had never dreamed that on his way back home he would also find gratification for his longing for beauty. Yet what befell him was nothing less. The menorah with its growing brilliance was indeed a thing of beauty, and inspired lofty thoughts. So he set to work and with an expert hand sketched a design for a menorah to present to his children the following year. He made a free adaption of the motif of the eight arms of equal height which projected from the central stem to the right and to the left, each pair on the same level. He did not consider himself bound by the rigid traditional form, but created again directly from nature, unconcerned with other interpretations which, of course, continued to be no less valid on that account. What he was aiming for was vibrant beauty. But even as he brought new motion into the rigid forms, he still observed their tradition, the refined old style of their arrangement. It was a tree with slender branches, whose ends opened up like calyxes, and it was these calyxes that were to hold the candles.

With such thoughtful occupation the week passed. There came the eighth day, on which the entire row of lights is kindled, including the faithful ninth candle, the shamash, which otherwise serves only to light the others. A great radiance shone forth from the menorah. The eyes of the children sparkled. For our friend, the occasion became a parable for the awakening of a whole nation. First one candle — it is still dark and the solitary light looks gloomy. Then it finds a companion, then another, and yet another. The darkness must retreat. The young and the poor are the first to see the light. Then the others join in, all those who love justice, truth, liberty, progress, humanity and beauty. When all the candles are ablaze everyone must stop in amazement and rejoice at what has been wrought. And no office is more blessed than that of a servant of this light.

Theodor Herzl, “The Menorah,” in Harry Zohn, trans., Zionist Writings: Essays and Addresses (New York: Herzl Press, 1973), vol. 1, pp. 203-206.

[theomenroom]

Character agency and Nem's penultimate heart event

I really don't like this one, it's a shallow power fantasy. and I was thinking about how to re-tool it into a more realistic depiction of abuse, and I think the simplest way to do it would be to increase Nem's agency in it.

Rather than making it be Sol convincing Nem that she deserves better than how Vace is treating her, make it that Nem is already thinking about leaving (maybe Vace has recently escalated past a line she thought she'd never allow someone to cross), but has real reasons to feel trapped.

All her friends, except Sol, are Helios now. She's not on speaking terms with Cal, and she was never close with Dys or Marz or Tang. She and her mom have grown apart, because her mom keeps trying to baby her and she's outgrown that. Her social status in that group was bolstered enormously by dating Vace; she tells you as much. She might lose all of her friends if she leaves him.

and she's seen what happens to people who Vace directs his anger at. Even if Vace doesn't do anything, his cronies still beat them up to try to impress Vace; that's a big part of Rex's deal.

and then there's the fact that he's a control freak with anger issues, a history of violence, an enjoyment of inflicting suffering, and access to the colony's armory. If she leaves him without assuming he might try to kill her that's leaving things to chance in an un-soldierly way.

Let Nem be the agent here wanting to leave, and let Sol help her brainstorm and offer things to keep her safe to make it so that she can leave, instead of Sol convincing her to leave and she's gone the next day.

Maybe Nem needs to transfer to expedition support or something to get away from Vace, and after this, going foraging in the valley boosts friendship with her. Utopia would love to get someone transferred from a combat role to the survey team instead of the other way around, and Rhett would probably understand.

Maybe Sol helps her work out an arrangement so she's never left alone in the colony, which could involve having to reconcile her with her mom or with Cal.

Put Nem and what she wants and needs at the center, and let Sol help her with real obstacles.

[askbensolo]

"Then I tracked down Poe and convinced him to down a couple beers with me and play Podracing Simulator till 1am (which took no convincing at all, him being Poe) because I was desperately trying to rot my brain outta my skull." Hey Ben, I know you're going through a lot right now and it might feel like you're not getting anywhere, but that ^^^ right there? That shows growth. I think the Ben of 5, 6, 7 years ago would have had a much harder time recognizing he needed to pause, find a friend, and do an activity to give his brain a break from the problem.

Sure, it's not a long term solution, but taking breaks is important! My own therapist even suggests taking breaks after our sessions to do an activity with minimal brain effort that you enjoy to let your conscious mind rest and your nervous system re-regulate.

You think so?

…Okay. Okay.

No...you're right. I have grown a lot. From...how I used to be, anyway.

...Yeah. You're right. I sure would've done a lot worse under that kinda stress, some years ago.

Yeah. I had kind of a hard day today. Couldn't focus. Super anxious. I just...couldn't stop thinking about her, like at work and stuff, and thinking about this summer, and how I was always super excited for five o'clock, because that meant coming back home—coming back home to where she was—and by now I've gotten used to Poe and Beebee-Ate and even Threepio all being here instead, but—when 4:50pm hits, it's like some kind of psychological trigger, I start to miss her—and I don't know why that wouldn't translate into me texting her back on time—well, it's kind of a moot point now, I don't think she wants to hear from me—but—I'm just—I don't know—well, anyway...

No, but...maybe Amalia was right. Maybe I'm not good enough for her. Well—I know I'm not—I always knew that...

...I do want what's best for her. And...I don't think it's me. I think she's really good for me—I think she makes me a better person—but...that's beside the point, isn't it?

But then...that was her whole thing, right, that I shouldn't think she'll always be "better" than me—that I'm not just stuck being Like This—

...I should just shut up. Talking myself in circles. Getting dizzy.

But, uh...I was thinking maybe I should go hang out with my family this weekend. It's been a while. I mean...like what you said, right? Hanging out with people. It helps.

And anyway I kind of started hearing voices in my head again today during my second panic attack but not like literally hearing voices just having thoughts and it was kind of like how I used to hear things in my head but not really AND IT'S NOT SNOKE it wasn't him I swear but all the same it made me feel like I need to make sure I keep in contact with the people who love me most the people who for whatever reason are supposed to always love me even if she stops loving me—

I NEED TO SHUT UP. ugh

You said it's good to do mindless activities when you're overwhelmed, right?

...Awesome. I'm gonna go hate-watch Love Among Hutts. No spoilers, please—I haven't seen the finale yet. Rooting for Khartoha, though.

[sapphire-weapon]

So like, I have a very different opinion about the new direction Ada may be taking. To clarify, I know it's RE and I should never expect masterfully skilled story telling and I also don't want to stir the Ada pot, lol. Just had something niggling at me and was wondering if anybody out there can see where I'm coming from or give their explanation as to WHY I'm wrong, because I absolutely could be, but disagree like a normal and rational adult (very uncommon RE fandom occurrence /j).

In a nutshell, her arc is just fucking stupid. Is it better than OG? Yes, because the original practically just doesn't have one *shrug*, but the new direction just makes her so incredibly unlikeable and a bit cringe worthy. The whole "well I didn't THINK about the massive consequences of my actions until now honestly" trope... dude she's like thirty years old. "Oh, this guy was kind over half a decade ago and planted a seed in my brain, despite the fact I'm already a grown woman". The comparison to Ashley and Leon and what could've been. Blah, blah.... it's still incredibly sexist. It just is. My problem isn't that "Ada's mean", it's the fact that they're writing her almost infantile with how she thinks. There are plenty of other women in RE who've been through shit, had their arcs and did their thing in a way that kept their own agency. That's the part that matters, but remake Ada still hasn't quite gotten there. I think, in the long term, they WANT to make her into something that resembles a human, but it just slightly misses the mark still. She's incredibly selfish, that's fine, but her reasoning for change and introspection is headache inducing and doesn't make much sense. "I'll actively partake in terrorism for profit because I'm just that gal, y'know? I was born a femme fatale baby... but... what do you mean I could've had a romance? People I KNOW might also be impacted? Nevermind, now I'll consider why this might be bad." Dude..... come on.....

My very, very unpopular take... if this is seriously the line of thought they want to keep for her, I would rather she be killed off, and I say that as someone who ironically actually likes her and WANTS a decent story. Better to have Leon experience some forgiveness arc bullshit or whatever than have to painfully sit through another entire story of a grown woman with the reasoning skills of a preteen.

Again, I know this'll probably garner vitriol, I'm just curious to hear why I may be just approaching this the wrong way. I will admit I have knee jerk reactions to sexism, so I could very much just have a clouded vision of the potential that IS there and misinterpreting what I'm seeing in the first place *shrug*. What are your thoughts? Can you at least make sense of why I feel the way I do about this particular aspect of the game?

Your analysis is flawed for one very specific reason:

You think Ada changed from RE2make.

She hasn't.

Ada's still only out for Ada. The only thing that Leon changed about her was that he taught her how to better take care of herself. He taught her that she can't isolate in her independence, because things that go wrong for other people can negatively impact her, too.

The person who actually softens Ada is Luis, not Leon. But even then, there's no reason to think that Ada changed. He softened her to the point where she felt compelled to honor his memory and fulfill his dying wish, but she's not a better person because of it. She's gained honor from her interactions with Luis, not kindness.

She's going to still do the Ada thing of working for bad guys and profiting from the black market, because it's not about "oh no people I like might get hurt ;_;" That's not what Remake did with her. She's still doing her Ada thing. She only decides against giving the Amber to Wesker because it's the final part of honoring Luis's memory. Luis died to save two people. To then kill billions after the fact using the research that he no longer wanted to have hurt anyone is dishonorable.

But once her time with Los Illuminados is done, her time honoring Luis's memory is done. Whatever happens in Africa or the ESR or Edonia or China following this has nothing to do with him, so she's going to go back to doing her thing.

The point of having Ada watch The Leon and Ashley Show is to solidify Leon's autonomy from her and to try to further showcase how selfish Ada is. Ada still looks at Leon as a thing -- he's something she wants, and she doesn't understand why she can't have him. Making her watch The Leon and Ashley Show is meant to try to get her to reflect on why.

But it doesn't work. Because Ada hasn't changed. And won't change. And possibly can't change.

Through Leon in RE2make, Ada has become better suited to be independent. And through Luis in RE4make, Ada has become someone who keeps her word. That's what the Remakes have changed about her. That's why her story is so much better. They're not trying to make her a good guy. They're not trying to have her rethink her life. They're not trying to have her show remorse.

They're giving honor to a dishonorable character, along with a consistently selfish mindset to continue the work that she does. That's all they're doing.

And not for nothing anon but the way you keep calling her stupid and infantile is way more sexist than anything the narrative did with her. This ask came off like you hated Ada first and then reached for some sort of explanation as to why you could be justified in hating her second. There are legitimate reasons to criticize Ada, but you've cited none of them. Instead of looking at what the character was actually doing, you just slapped "she's stupid" on her.

ETA: added this post to my meta directory, because it seems important here and I should probably have it on hand.

[anthonybialy]

No Confusion Over Who Runs Biden White House

Divided sects are split under Joe Biden.  Making fractions even smaller is his specialty.  You already knew such if you’ve checked your bank account and grocery receipt.

It’s not just the country as a whole that’s feuding.  Fighting within a party is particularly amusing for the allegedly peace-loving one in question.  The inability to find consensus is one way to flaunt diversity.

Democrats argue amongst themselves about whether Joe Biden is too addled to pass their agenda.  Who wins?  The nation.  The only time the incumbent embarrassed himself more than during his present bout with clarity was when he was thinking at his fullest.

The Jill Biden/Barack Obama presidency seeks its first full faux term after their semi-victory.  If this seems shady, you’re familiar with their work.  Two all-time manipulators head a shady cast of bumbling interdictors who see the befuddled patriarch’s sad condition as an opportunity.  Remember: they’re the selfless ones.

The same signature-forgers who cornered Joe in the Oval Office early after his election want to selflessly serve as head of state while their addled potato holds the titled.  Their marionette skills have grown more blatant.  The strings become more visible as they get more practice.  Choosing between fibbing to conceal their intentions and being forced to admit their putzing schemes makes them perfect Democrats.

Trying to remove Biden because he wouldn’t be able to pass their agenda shows how much Democrats care.  It’s not about a person.  Telling everyone else what to do even though they’re demonstrably awful at it is their guiding passion.  Elder abuse isn’t a qualm nagging at designers of a new country and humanity who simply need office access.  Class warfare bullies figure heartless tycoons are just as amorally calculating.  The lack of empathy is thorough.

This presidency growing even faker would at least keeping them from inflicting more claptrap.  The political power his faction craves disappears alongside memories of what his name is.

What fortunes could escape squandering thanks to an executive who can’t muster authority on account of still wearing his bathrobe?  Without a quasi-coherent Biden, college enrollees might have to pay for what they use, which is the most important lesson they can learn.  Discovering billing for services is way more useful than whatever’s presented in sociology classes.

An uncivil civil war features lots of hair-pulling.  The cause is as funny as the action.  Conflict originated in debating if their leader is too torpid to screw up the economy more.  Intramural anger at least keeps them from focusing on their ultimate daft goal.

Facing a propped-up established failure seems like the easiest election to win.  But you underestimate the ability of Republicans to embarrass clowns with comparisons that go too far against relatively dignified circuses.  A foe that’s forgotten what conservatism is advocates for equality by not nominating someone who’d embarrass the incumbent with a certain win.  You must want a competitive election unless you loathe democracy.

Longterm benefits come accidentally when the two options fight to lose.  Republicans would end up in better shape than after another Trump presidency.  We just have to endure another term dedicated to a slightly different kind of suffering.  Anyone realistic enough to know that’s what life’s about is already braced for woe unlike liberals who inflict it unnecessarily and excessively by striving to eliminate it.

An unfathomable re-election would be like hurricane preparation for the nation.  Stormy conditions have been so constant that homeowners can put up plywood via muscle memory.  Wiser Supreme Court justices holding on through the gusts would prove their resilience on top of constitutional fidelity.  Liberty fans hate to make the same calculation about valuing people based on how useful they are politically.  But Democrats surely respect others playing their game.

Ditching Biden is a bipartisan dream.  Entrenched fossilization keeps everyone in the current era from happiness.  Saddling themselves with an extinct dodo is the closest Democrats come to restraining government.  Dodging implementation is based in their ineptness, so everything works out.

Anyone looking at the current president who says they want him serving into 2029 can’t credibly claim anything they believe works.  Biden’s minions are trying to commit insurance fraud regarding a policy they took out on America.  The grasshopper grifters of the sensei grow increasingly less convincing that they’re out to help.

Grandpa refusing to switch the locks shows the benefits of limiting how much of an influence people like him have in our lives.  His sole worthwhile contribution takes the form of a bad example, which doesn’t surprise anyone who heard him speak decades ago.

It took a tremendous amount of agony to learn why getting rich without working makes everyone poor.  Everyone promise to remember this time.  We’ve endured obvious scams for a couple centuries.  The present White House is limited by more than painful actuality.  

The promise of fecklessness from idiots is ironically their best chance of winning besides running against a Trump.  A Silver Alert for Biden while he’s standing right there shows the joy of absence.  I’d feel guilty if his friends and family cared.  Not having government invade your life to make it even worse is the upside of a president who no longer possesses the vigor to annoy.

Biden is a bad idea because of his bad ideas.  The crafty elder is limited by his inability to read sentences a sentient human wrote for him, much less form them on his own.  The presidential office is without the president, who is busy with his slot car tournament.  He’s the only entrant.  The best hope for everyone not competing is that he’s too feeble to ruin other races.  Refusing to let him sit on a porch and try to chase birds could save the republic.

[astro-break]

New hypmic anime season and I'm BACK IN THE FUCKING BUILDING AGAIN (I feel like the Martha I'm coming home sweetie audio)

Thoughts on the 1st ep of Hypmic Rhyme Anima+. Spoilers beware

New plotline lets gooooooo I like that they're straying away from the drama tracks actually, Rhyme Anima is fundamentally a different experience from the core drama tracks which gives new material for both new and old fans OP is an actual banger, Ramuda's verse is the best fight me all you want but you know i'm right Nemu!! uh spoiler chara for anyone new to the anime I guess? Like they spoil her right at the introduction and iirc they didn't really build off her mystery in the first season. Makes her impact here a bit weaker but I'm willing to let it slide since some might not catch it (Post Editing Astro here: I haven't rewatched Rhyme Anima since it finished airing and uh. Nemu definitely was a plot point there lol they dropped it after ep 11 but she was there!) Jyushi my son I love you so much you idiot I love the little stingers for each team that they did for each team, its so cute and gives so much personality The visuals have definitely improved, a big step above the last season in terms of animation i don't see an improvement with story writing though… Pacing is still all over the place and very squished/fast paced makes sense since the cast has grown by a quarter since last season but still makes me sad that there isn't much time given to each character individually I forgot how much I love the localization of Doppomine Okay so Pink hair and Green hair in the flashback are most definitely the two in the white cloaks. Theres just no subtly with this series lmaoooo Nice that they were able to incorporate everyone somehow but too many people means that too many parts to handle I'm getting deja vu, this exact same thing happened last season…. Oh. Its the same guy. Makes sense lmfao Listen bud I have minimal rap experience but that rap was just embarrassing wow. No rhyme or flow, there was only straight passion which i mean props I guess but you suck ass Look at me being so smart and predicting all of these ahead of time without looking at any materials Did Rio just contact Jyuto with his hypmic???? Samatoki have I ever said that I love your for being a bullheaded idiot? bc I do. you're so silly Damn the typography has gotten even better, its just a lot more smooth and the animation too especially during Jiro's part is just so stylish The animation has improved a lot I'm glad it got a little more love compared to last season My guess is that maybe someone from the six divisions will fall under the anger thingy that's going around, something like the stage show. My biggest guess is that they might re-incite the Samatoki and Ichiro conflict again but I hope not. Another guess is that there will be old MCD or Naughty Busters beef which seems more plausible given that this is Sasara and Kuko's anime debut but I guess we'll wait and see THE OUTFITS!!! THE STUPID OUTFITS I LOVE THEM the art style of the ED is super pop punk and has a strong sense of style which i love. its simple but stands out really well which i love Very jjk but more toned down. Feels a bit like a cleaned up croquis drawings the smear frames is just so stylish and good, very simple and a bit messy and sells the gesture drawing kind of feel of the ED Ramuda's parrot costume i love you Those hand signs just make the first letter of each word which is really fun. Not proper JSL though I guess beggars can't be choosers esp for a series like this

Overall, a really strong start. It shows how it built off the first season and where it improved and while some things (like the horrid pacing) never change, at the end of the day its still a fun and delightful watch

If anyone wanted to read my thoughts on the first season, they're all archived here

[transcendersmedia]

Making sports into drama (and games?)

An anime analysis from a game design perspective

I admit: I am a great sports anime nerd (and I’ve previously written about the volleyball anime Haikyuu and its fandom) – something that also affects my thinking around game design. What makes sports anime so good – better than watching the sports themselves – is that they usually combine the thrill and achievements of those sports with portrayal of the characters performing them. For me, that adds an invaluable component, since I’m also a character and fictional relationships nerd.

Ookiku Furikabutte - manga by Higuchi Asa

I’ve categorized the series based on how much of the dramatic content focuses on the game or sport itself and how much it relies on other factors, such as relationships between characters outside of sports. I’ll put my main focus on the series that primarily revolve around the sport. Many are based on manga, but not all. (Whether the series originates as manga or not might actually also affect the content, but it’s not something that I’ll go into in this post.)

Categorizing the shows

Series where the drama is primarily built around the content of the sport:

Ookiku Furikabutte/Big Windup (baseball)

Diamond no Ace/Ace of the Diamond (baseball)

Haikyuu!! (volleyball)

Kuroko no Basket/Kuroko’s Basketball (basketball)

Series where the drama is built around a combination of the sport’s content and other factors:

Kaze ga Tsuyoku Fuiteru/Run with the Wind (running)

Tsurune: Kazemai Koukou Kyuudoubu (archery)

Yuri!!! on Ice (figure skating)

2.43: Seiin Koukou Danshi Volley-bu/2.43: Seiin High School Boys Volleyball Team (volleyball)

Days (soccer)

Re-main (water polo)

Ping Pong the Animation (ping pong)

Series where the drama is primarily built around content outside of the sport:

Free! (swimming)

Hoshiai no Sora/When Stars Align (soft tennis)

Keppeki Danshi! Aoyama-kun/Clean Freak Aoyama-kun (soccer)

Cheer Danshi!!/Cheer Boys!! (cheerleading)

Bakuten!!/Backflip!! (rhythmic gymnastics)

Taisou Zamurai / The Gymnastics Samurai (gymnastics)

It’s interesting to see that the focus on sports content could in part be related to which target group the series is aimed towards. It seems like shounen anime (“for boys”) has a larger focus on sports content, whereas shoujo (“for girls”) and seinen (“for grown-ups”) revolve more around relationships.

Could set-based sports with clear positions be easier to dramatize?

Haikyuu!! - manga by Haruichi Furudate

Both volleyball and baseball translate well into anime format. Volleyball’s set-based play makes it easy to create exciting match portrayals. The game involves turn-taking and players’ positions on the court, including who serves and rotates, creating clear recurring moments of suspense. Since the objective is to win the most sets out of a predetermined number, the outcome of a match isn’t known until the decisive set is played.

The psychological play and complexity

Ookiku Furikabutte - manga by Higuchi Asa

The complexity of baseball could be seen as a disadvantage due to its difficulty to comprehend, but it’s a double-edged sword, since the complexity also adds excitement. Baseball matches as a whole can become slow, especially if the teams are adept at defense and don’t allow scoring hits. However, in anime, unlike in reality, there’s the possibility to cut or quickly summarize dull parts of the match.

Baseball and volleyball gameplay loops

A Gameplay Loop is a game design term that is used to describe the repetitive activities that a player will take while playing a game. It, essentially, defines what the player DOES while playing. – Engaged Family Gaming

Diamond no Ace - manga by Terajima Yuuji

In volleyball, a loop begins with one team serving, the ball is then moved between teams by players with various roles (such as setter, wing spiker, blocker, libero) until it hits the floor on one side of the net, determining which team scores a point. This loop is integrated into the larger system by having the first team to reach a certain number of points win the set, while the overall match aims to win the most sets out of (usually) five.

Do shorter loops and turned-based sports make for better drama?

The smallest loops in baseball and volleyball are clear and quite short, allowing for detailed focus on the characters executing decisive actions. The moments before a serve/pitch provide space for inner monologues and character communication. Side changes and innings/sets frame the matches, making it easier for viewers to follow, compared to more fluid sports like basketball or soccer. In turn-based sports, breaks are incorporated into the game’s design. Therefore, I believe that turn-based sports, where players also have very specific roles, are more favorable to portray, than sports where players have more similar roles and the game is more fluid. (Perhaps this is why Kuroko no Basket assigned supernatural abilities to the players, adding an extra dimension to the game that makes it a little more video game-like? Well, it could also be because the creator wanted to make a series about basketball players with supernatural abilities. Personally, I find that supernatural abilities detract from the intrigue of sports, but that’s a matter of taste.) 

Haikyuu!! - manga by Haruichi Furudate

Teams are great for drama

I believe team sports are better suited for storytelling than individual sports. This might be because team sports allow for more complexity in the narrative, as players within a team can be rivals, while also depending on each other to develop and win. Opposing teams are obvious antagonists, but the most interesting events often happen within the teams, between the characters that viewers have come to know, and whose development they are following. Team sports also have recurring tournaments where teams can face the same opponents multiple times, enabling long series that maintain suspense. This exists in individual sports too, but individual competition feels more one-dimensional than team-based competition. So, aside from game (sports) design itself, the setup around teams, tournaments, and matches also influences the narrative. Series centered on individual sports tend to focus more on character relationships outside of competitions, possibly because the sport itself doesn’t provide enough material to build drama solely around it.

Translating sports into drama - and games!

When translating sports into drama, there are factors that can both facilitate and complicate the dramatic buildup. If the focus is on the game itself, it’s advantageous if the game has a high level of complexity, clear/short loops, and specific roles, preferably with inherent conflicts. Among the sports I’ve seen depicted, I would say that baseball has the greatest potential to create compelling drama. However, with that said, the storyteller’s skill will likely have a bigger impact on the story than the design of the sport itself.

I’ve based this analysis on anime series, and they have their aesthetics, structures and way of portraying things. I’m very curious as to whether the components of a great sports anime – sports/game content together with character development and relationships – could also be made into great games. The content of digital games and anime series are very different, but I think there are still learnings to be made from analysing and also comparing those media forms.

Please let me know through our social channels which games you have played that include sports mechanics and relationships. I have played Pyre, which I think combine those things well. I also have Roller Drama on my to play-list, but I would like to know of more games that focus on sports and relationships (sports relation games!).

A last side note: When there was finally an anime about Water Polo – Re-main – the creators missed the opportunity of telling the amazing story on how this sport might have come into fruition – as a water based version of horse polo, called Polo Aquatic, where players rode on barrels hitting a ball with sticks… I mean, that’s something you can’t exclude!

[zukkacore]

Idek who in my audience would still be on the h*p bandwagon but tbh I say this as a pitch both for ppl who still have nostalgia for the property and ppl who enjoy being haters (I mean, if you can withstand the salt without also getting just so so so burned out hearing about JKR’s bigotry, I know it hits me sometimes too), the Shrieking Shack Podcast is excellent in terms of critical analysis of the wizard books while also just being extremely funny. I swear the hosts xeecee and Liz have a wire tap into my brain, in terms of sense of humor and just voicing the problems I have with this stupid franchise.

I understand the stance of people who are avoidant of the franchise completely, but I do think having a better understanding of how and why the books ultimately failed and veered off in quality definitely helped me demystify the franchise as this like, untouchable thing of quality I was too attached to to ever give up but instead as a flawed work that I had grown out of and was far more at peace with letting go. I also think it helps me articulate to other people why the artist is not separate from the art. Her worldview is imbedded into her books, and especially later on, that’s why they were so mean-spirited and awful. No matter how much I liked the series as a kid, I think the distaste for the pernicious aspects of the franchise has been an… effective deterrent for me going back. And while I don’t have the energy to get into terminally online arguments, I think critical analysis is useful as a skill to give people who also have a skewed and nostalgia colored view of the franchise.

I will addendum that their perspective on the first few books is a lot more charitable and while I do agree w their thoughts, hearing nice things abt the franchise might feel distasteful in this climate, (I know it is for me) so if that’s the case and you have no problem starting in the middle I recommend starting around book 4! That’s when you start to get much more of a mixed bag.

And if you wanna hear basically nothing but wall to wall dunking, start with Deathly Hallows. Jumping in cold to a seventh season is rough but I promise it’s so worth it. I re-listen to the podcast All The Time when I’m between interests, and I tend to skip the early seasons and just go straight for the bad stuff. I’ve probably gone back to the DH season so many times. It’s brutal yet somehow completely earned. I’ve never seen anyone so thoroughly articulate my long held feelings that DH is a failure of a capstone on that franchise on all levels structural, thematic, and moral. This is not me pretending I had clairvoyance into the future bc there was plenty of shit that snuck past me as a kid (hello, book 4 was my favorite for forever) but when I read that book in like 5th grade I could just feel something was deeply wrong.

Also they just wrapped up the season where they were reading midnight sun and twilight at the same time and it’s been great. It’s way more lighthearted which has been a nice palate cleanser & I do think they’re a bit charitable toward twilight but the thing I appreciate is that their critique is more substantive than just the common reactionary low hanging fruit talking points & they have actually brought up the neglected topic of racism within the books

Also if you’re just starting and the news topics + freebies / goofs segment they do at the beginning and ends of the episodes throws you off , I get it. I love shriekcast & I do find the segments funny but they’re not everyone’s thing, and I do scrub through that stuff sometimes bc it can be long winded. For reference It usually lasts abt 30-40 min sometimes shorter and occasionally way longer.

[leqclerc]

Imo, I think charles time at ferrari is up. As much as he loves the team, I'm sure even he can see that there's no future there. When he came in they told him that it'll take some time to get settled as they'd just had a restructuring and he was patient and paid his due. In that time the small changes made happened way too slowly and if we're following that same pattern, it will be years before the team gets settled again and by that time Ferrari board will have grown inpatient and fired whoever is in charge. If you read all these articles about how all the changes mattia asked for was dismissed by elkann and how vigna was interfering with strategy then the problem obviously lies very high up and will take years to change and charles just doesn't have the time anymore to wait it out.

Yeah, it's sad to think about, but if you consider where Seb was four years into his time at Ferrari vs. where Charles is... I mean 2020 was a complete write-off, then 2021 was better but still a recovery period. So that's two years where any hopes of the title are completely out the window.

Here are Charles's 2022 stats (so his first year of really being able to challenge or seriously think about the championship):

Here's Seb's 2017 and 2018 seasons:

It's especially depressing in the context of Max, as they're from the same generation and are most frequently compared. When Ferrari were being best of the rest, Max was clinching his first title. Now he's ran away with his second, and is probably the most likely candidate to make it three in a row next year. Gone are the days of 2019 when they were both rising stars looking for their first title challenge, on the cusp of greatness. Yet Ferrari's performance has remained on more or less at the same level (she really said everyone else moved on but I stayed here 😭)

I get where Charles is coming from. There's nothing I would love more than to see Ferrari back on top with Charles leading them and ending their title drought. Their Charles, their first big junior academy success, the driver who's been intrinsically linked with the team since his teenage years. There's something magical about Ferrari when they get it right. I want to see them win.

But at the same time, Charles was given the longest contract in Ferrari's history and there's little to show for it. He's still young, but his peer has two titles to his name, and there are 2000s kids already racing on the grid. By the time he's out of his Ferrari contract he's going to be 27. Lewis was 27, almost 28, when he signed with Mercedes. So it's kind of a make it or break it time for a driver, and these two years are going to be crucial for Ferrari to rally around him and prove they can be a title winning, or at the very least, a title contending team. Right now there aren't many opportunities (in terms of open seats) and, well, Charles loves this team and the people in it. He's determined to make it work. In two years, though, the market might look completely different. He's been praised by many key figures, and I think potential employers know how valuable he is. So the ball's in Ferrari's court to deliver.

Re: Vigna, though, I'm not sure how credible that rumour is (I think it popped up in Rencken's recent piece?) He seems like a much more distant figurehead than Marchionne was (often hands on, visited the paddock, very involved with the drivers). I don't think I've seen him in the paddock at all, at least, not that I can recall. So the idea that he was meddling with the strategy calls just doesn't seem that plausible. Ferrari's top brass is a whole mess, it arguably always has been to a degree, but this doesn't make much sense. Occam's Razor: the pitwall just messed up too many times.

TL;DR: Charles and Ferrari is the dream team. But F1 careers can be short and fickle. Realistically you only have a ~10 year or so window to really be at the top of your career and fight for titles. As much as I want him to win with Ferrari specifically, I'm also dreading the possibility of him never becoming champion at all. So I hope he does what's best for him and his career. It would be a waste to see a talent like Charles never be crowned champion simply because of his circumstances.

[dynanatlasalle]

Amazon and Grubhub Partnership

Amazon has a new partnership with Grubhub (owned by Just Eat Takeaway) so now Amazon is back in the restaurant delivery business. 

Amazon tried restaurant delivery but exited the business in 2019 after trying it for four years. The original plan in 2015, was to compete with Grubhub and other food delivery services. Amazon Prime members could place orders for food from restaurants and have it delivered with no delivery fees. Amazon seemed dedicated to this because they even had a division at Amazon called Amazon Restaurants.

Amazon apparently identified the restaurant delivery business as a strategic uncertainty and decided to exit the business. Amazon must have assessed the risk of negative impact to be very high. In my opinion, the timing of the exit was unfortunate because the Covid lockdowns began shortly after their exit from the food delivery business. But Amazon also apparently decided to monitor the food delivery industry after exiting because only 3 years later they are back in the business.

Another point of view is that Amazon could have been simply testing the industry, learning what they wanted to learn in the food delivery business then after the trial, decided there was a better way to make a profit in this category. Buying into a partnership instead of owning a restaurant delivery business might have been assessed to be a better use of Amazon resources. Grubhub is an established brand with experience and knowledge in the restaurant delivery business so maybe this partnership is a smart strategic move for both brands.

The timing for the re-entry into food delivery makes sense due to a change in the way we live, work, and eat as a result of the Covid pandemic. Food delivery services such as Instacart, Uber Eats, Deliveroo and Door Dash all experienced an acceleration in orders during the Covid lockdown.  Although the surge in demand ceased, data on the food delivery services indicates that consumers who tried food delivery services during the lockdown liked what they tried.

Since Amazon started in the restaurant delivery business in 2015, the market has changed. There is more consumer demand but there is also more competition from other food and restaurant delivery services.

This graph shows that with the increase in demand comes new competitors and changes in market share. This is very characteristic of the growth stage of the Product Life Cycle (PLC) and this means all competitors will be shifting marketing strategies to defend their market share.

I find it interesting that Amazon is entering the fray (again) when there are so many competitors with more significant expertise than them in the food delivery category. They now have to compete against  Door Dash’s 59 % market share and Uber Eats 24% market share. 

Since Grubhub has only 13% market share, a big question I have is this: why Grubhub?

According to data published in Tech Crunch, Grub Hub has experienced consistent growth in Revenue each year since 2010. In 2010, Grubhub generated $8.5 million in revenue. At the end of 2021, Grubhub generated $2.1 Billion in annual revenue.  That is impressive revenue for Grubhub and since Grubhub has the business model set up, it should be easy for Amazon to generate significant revenue without spending too heavily on existing Amazon resources. Additional impressive data about Grubhub is growth in the number of users. According to the chart below, Grubhub had 3.4 million users in 2013, at the end of 2021, Grubhub had 33.8 million users who purchase through the app once a month.Sources: Company data,  Food Delivery App Report, TechCrunch.

Although Grubhub is a growing delivery business, I wonder what criteria Amazon used in their choice of Grub Hub. It is clear that Grub Hub has been consistently growing revenue and has grown in terms number of users but there must be something else that Amazon sees in this partnership. From a growth perspective, this is a good business for Grubhub but I still wonder what else Amazon knows about Grub Hub to make this their choice.

Although overall growth has been good for Grub Hub, their quarterly sales per customer has not seen the increase that competitors have seen (more than doubled for Uber Eats and Door Dash).

I have a lot of questions about Amazon’s decision. Why not go it alone? Do they still assess this as a strategic uncertainty and they are trying to minimize risk of failure?

Is it possible that their timing was wrong when they first tried this? Consumer patterns have changed since the pandemic and maybe many people that tried food delivery then found that they really benefit from a service like this and do it more often.  Is it possible that more people like to eat at home than before and delivery gives people a restaurant food experience at home? Or, is it possible that Amazon did not give restaurant delivery a chance?  What are their criteria for exiting a business?

The part that doesn’t make sense to me is the re- entering the restaurant delivery business after exiting only 3 years ago. This is Amazon, and we assume they have the talent, resources, assets etc. to have monitored the situation, gathered data, make changes, continue on without an exit from the business.  

There are many more questions about Amazon’s decision.  Was it a strategic decision (and brilliant) to partner with Grub Hub and essentially purchase their expertise, data, market share and revenue? Does this allow them to monitor this strategic uncertainty using fewer of their own resources? Was the original restaurant delivery business part of an experiment with something they will never reveal? Is the new Grubhub partnership and efficient way to offer Amazon Prime subscribers a new benefit at little cost to Amazon? 

In my opinion, the re-entry is another test to gather data for something bigger in Amazon’s strategic plan for growth. In the meantime, they will have another benefit to add to the list of Amazon Prime membership benefits.

I look forward to following this story .

Sources: 

https://techcrunch.com/2015/09/08/amazon-launches-a-food-delivery-service-via-prime-now-starting-in-seattle/

https://techcrunch.com/2019/06/11/amazon-restaurants-in-u-s-is-shutting-down/

https://techcrunch.com/2022/07/06/amazon-takes-a-prime-step-back-into-restaurant-delivery-in-the-us-with-new-grubhub-investment-and-partnership/

https://www.restaurantdive.com/news/amazon-restaurants-is-dead-but-the-e-tailer-is-still-hungry-for-food-deliv/556902/