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whyamiheretumbled · 1 year ago
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hisses
Three ships:Neurotoxins(2012 Aprilrai)Joth Gf's(Shinirai),Kitten Boots(Sunita x Raph)
First Ship:Uhm Archie's weird mysteries the blonde girl x the dark haired girl x archie
Last song:Bimbo Doll
Last Movie:Rise Movie
Currently Reading:Unity on ao3,Blood is Thicker than ooze on ao3,and The Monster(physical copy)
Currently Watching:Law and order SVU
Currently Consuming:rice and beans,cookies,and an Arizona
Currently craving:Free time to get these two projects done before Halloween 😔🎃
9 people you would like to get to know better
was tagged by @lagomorphlady! wanted to make my own post for it because the og was very long and kinda fucked up? at least whenever I tried to look at it... anyway!
Three ships: Klapollo, Casphardt, Homuruu
First ship ever: Razaya (how fitting for me that it's a rarepair)
Last song: THE DEATH OF PEACE OF MIND by Bad Omens
Last movie: Resident Evil: Damnation
Currently reading: The Last Dogs: The Long Road (it was probably the first chapter book series I ever read, and it thankfully holds up very well!)
Currently watching: Fairy Ranmaru (for like, the third time)
Currently consuming: mac and cheese and a glazed cinnamon roll :3
Currently craving: there was this one really good restaurant in my hometown that had the BEST steak fries... I wonder if it's still open...
9 tags: @roseverdict @corvinho @tomaturtles @cinnamon-bunni @corvidfool @aroacenanami @rosethorn-zz @arithemadlad @strzygoncze
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technically if it's not simmered in the champagne region of france it's a sparkling best boy friend
#you see actually this is an ingeniously relevant caption b/c of the concept of Authentic food tying into the film's main themes re culture#Clearly impeccable lol....anyway here's me using this blog as like a tumblr hosted imgur#also just now in the shower it occurred to me the parallels / overlaps with My Big Fat Greek Wedding. obviously also v different but#so your family & by extension their culture aren't the Normal & your father especially holds on to this distinction#& you don't just want to work at the family business forever & then you meet a nice boy & there's no problem there he's just nice#except then how to reconcile this with your relationship w/your family & your culture & thus also your identity btw....#anyways how about that uhh#elemental#elemental 2023#pixar elemental#ember lumen#wade ripple#fanart#always a time & a half trying to decide how to tag these kinds of titles. but somehow i survive#it's really a testament to the so precisely captured Cuteness of wade's design that it's like; trying to just do a shadow of it justice lol#it's So good. definitely went for the like expressive wobbliness...the wavy smile is just thee perfect detail all thee time. ugh#giving both of them that Flow while also ember is pointier & has the whole luminosity element....the chefs are kissing#love the Relationship when it's like yeah it's easy to make it agonizing when it's like ya both people have fun & like each other & enjoy#being together & find the relationship enriching & motivating...you Are a cute couple / again that the conflict isn't really even like ooh#will the won't they as a question of if they really like each other; & Definitely not a question of [these ppl hate each other actually] lo#like me saying i like romcoms sometimes when it Does mostly mean i'll watch mybigfatgreekwedding 500x in a row. it's on youtube btw#then you watch some random other romcom & it's psychological torture. random xmas romcomdram like gave me a headache fr....#anyways really liked this film really had a great time i'm def gonna see it again soon#i loved both these characters & their relationship & the Elemental manifestation of Culture is really inchtaraesting#plus other metaphorical resonance ppl find...physical disability; queer experiences....#it was also fun b/c their interacting & their arcs w/each other having that mutual Effect & Change from their dynamic was like#that also just feels like both of them / their relationship = my relationship with myself &/or both how i interact w/the world/anyone#definitely always describing myself in ways like ''i never x except for when i do always; readily'' like Crying for sure lol. I'm Both....#probably a bit more wade? within Myself; by this point lol. i feel like maybe i'm the wade w/someone i'm more comfortable around#but that otherwise i probably come across more emberesque. usually. except for when it's the opposite except for when it's not lmao etc!!!!
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poltergeist-coffee · 1 year ago
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oh my god the delight i just got realizing tubbo could talk with tazercraft and they could teach him all about create mod oh my god oh my god
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whirling-ghost · 2 years ago
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I woke up to this wonderful sight and she has made up for it since by constantly being under my feet
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violetsareblue-selfships · 1 year ago
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good morning!! <3
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azurajay · 2 years ago
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hey uhhhh,,, long time no update,,,
I finished the magnus archives,,,,
What the Fuck
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candiliam328 · 3 months ago
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actually is there a better feeling than communicating with your bestie with single word messages but completely understanding each other
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neverendingford · 1 year ago
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lordsukunas · 8 months ago
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jjk men & you: nail appointment!
tldr: gojo, geto, nanami, ino, choso, toji, sukuna + mahito going with you to your nail appointment.
cw: fem!reader. sukuna refers to reader as ‘woman’ once. and mahito.
a/n: this was fun lowk. might do it for jjk boys, depends on my motivation. idk if mahito particularly counts as a man, but he’s here for my mootie. time to sleep now, enjoy!!!
✿ — gojo:
first things first, he’s paying for your nails. which sounds like a good thing, until you realize he’s insisting on going along with you. he’ll pester you the entire time, suggesting colors and styles (how does he know so much?!) and then doing anything to get you to laugh or look at him. sometimes it results in your nail tech getting a little lot frustrated because he keeps making you squirm. eventually, tho, he’ll stop and let the tech finish up your nails.
“they’re cute. would’ve been cuter if you let me pick, buuuut... still cute.”
✿ — ino:
he’ll flex his knowledge about nails like it’s something revolutionary or suggest a style that he swears is completely unique, only for you to correct him and realize that it’s really just basic information. he’ll spend the rest of the appointment scrolling through pinterest and instagram, trying to find inspo for your next set.
“ooh, baby, look. these are nice, right?”
✿ — nanami:
only pays if you want him to, and only goes if you want him to. is content to let you pick whatever style you want, but likes to pick out bold colors and suggest designs based on your interests or adding charms. always tips the tech, and once your nails are done, he gently grabs your hand and kisses the back of it.
“these suit you perfectly, my lady.”
✿ — geto:
at first, he is nawt going in there. unless you find a sorcerer nail tech, he’s going to be slick the entire time. he’ll side-eye everyone else getting their nails done, judge their taste (“why would she choose that shit-brown?”), and stand up the entire time. he doesn’t want the germs. once you’re done, he’s pulling you out of there as quickly as possible.
“here, take this. ... yes, it’s hand sanitizer. you don’t want those monkey germs, right?”
✿ — toji:
only goes because you told him if he tagged along, you’d pay. in reality, he was going to go all along, just to make sure nobody tries anything. he will slap the shit outta somebody, including your nail tech. sits in a tiny chair by your side, massive head resting on your shoulder and arms crossed, absolutely knocked out. he’ll only wake up if you shrug your shoulder or if the appointment ends (he has some kind of sixth sense for that shit).
“huh? ... nah, i ain’t sleep. you cute, now c’mon.”
✿ — choso:
kind of like gojo, clingy asf. he won’t make suggestions (bro has no idea, pls bear w/ him), but he’ll praise any and every decision you make. his arms will be wrapped around your waist the entire time, earning him lots of ‘awhss’ and ‘look at them! so cute.’ tips the nail tech for “making you extra gorgeous.” his words, not mine.
“you look good, i swear. i like the colors, and the shape, and the design, and your hands...”
✿ — sukuna:
has a personal nail tech. you think he maintains them black nails by himself? no. threatens his nail tech to do good on your nails, otherwise it’ll be the last set they ever do. makes minor suggestions, but is content to sit back and let you decide for yourself. he does have a preference color, though, either black, red, or dark purple. gets a weird urge to nibble your fingers once your nails are done. please don’t ask why.
“hm? you look fine, woman. nothing rivals your natural beauty, so quit ya whining.”
✿ — higuruma:
he’s awake for the entire prep process. watching you pick your colors, decide on a design, get settled in the chair. the second the nail tech actually gets to work, though, he’s tapped out. just like toji, he’s sitting in a chair beside you, head either resting in your lap or on your shoulder. if he could sit across from you, his head would be on your chest. only wakes up when it’s time to pay (he tips!) or if something goes wrong.
“... mm? oh, those are nice, sunshine. i like the little designs, very cute.”
✿ — mahito ..?:
a lil shit the entire time istg. doesn’t care what you pick, will poke and squish and pinch and nuzzle you the whole process, annoying both you and the tech. considers getting his done to match yours, but realizes he could probably just morph the shape of his soul instead of sitting there.
“those are, like, so cute! ... no? you don’t like my valley girl accent?”
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qhoaaaa · 3 months ago
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SO *claps hands* MILO GREER HUH 💛
I feel like if Erik ever does a flashback of Milo/Sweetheart becoming mates
I just
KENDOWHWOEDN
Think that Milo would be so fucking nervous
"Yeah, I just....see you... as my mate... yeap! And I know we've talked about this before and I just... wanted to say that... uhm... no, wanted to ask if... you'd wanna be my... mate?"
(Insert more lovey dovey shit he is yapping abt how amazing Sweetheart is and has been to him and how they have affected his life)
100% Asher would be more awkward but Milo's nerves are fucking SHOT because he's like holy shiiiiiitt I'm gonna fuckign do this aren't I yes I am
Trying to see if Milo would ask/say it in his apartment or the place where they hunted the Shade down together
Bc he's sentimental
Fucker (I love him)
"My ma is gonna be so fuckin happy"
He's crying your honor
Love a man whose in touch with his emotions
When Sweetheart says yes he's like,
"No shit... WAIT what did you say... yea, that's what I thought... (he's like how the fuck did i get to this point)... w-well what do I do now? I DONT KNOW IVE NEVER DONE THIS BEFORE"
Ahem (NSFW 18+ AFTER CUT)
Tagging! @annahxredaxted @moronkyne
He mounts them.
This is shameless smut you've been warned. 😈
They fuck first in the woods (if he asked in the woods) , then later at his apartment bc we all know these two can't keep their hands off each other...
Hands gripping their hips, it just comes natural to him, especially after they said yes to being his mate.
Let's out the most feral and gutteral moan when he presses inside them
And erm,,, 🥺
Bites.
Tons of biting, claims he wants to have his scent all over them and loves to see his teeth prints on their sweet neck and shoulders
If Sweetheart is on their belly, he bites at their nape, as if trying to keep them still (RHSIDBDJEJE PLEASE PELASEE EPWLSLSLEELEJR)
"My mate... my fucking mate! Mmhh, gonna... gonna fuck you nice and deep... just how my mate likes it..."
He legit won't stop touching them, his hands sliding over their sides, nails lightly pressing into them, he presses his cheek to their neck to smell them, to smell their pleasure, to hear their gasps and moans: he's worshipping them
Milo kinda likes to manhandle them, so there's times where he grips their hips up off the bed/surface and it makes them shiver, he flips them over onto their back to touch their chest and belly, and scoots closer between their legs to fuck them senseless
He does that thing where he moves Sweetheart's legs straight up and holds them and fucks between their thighs before slipping into their hole, he also spanks their thighs while he fucks them a bit
Kinda like honeymoon sex except they're not married, they're mates
And the whole time, he's just rambling on thanking them for being in his life, for being his mate, and being super cute and sappy while he's about to cum inside them
HE LAUGHS DURING SEX, BE STILL MY HEART
They fell asleep with his cock still inside them and in the morning when they're both up, Milo gently fucks into them again, holding them tight to his chest and he has the honor to see them cum on him AND to cum in them again
If they're feeling it, Sweetheart asks Milo for the good old 69 and Milo's like....
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"I fucking love youuu"
Milo's on the bottom (they actually push him on the bed and are like "you better fucking stay down and let me please you" and hes like "ooh... hell yeah Sweetheart" (heart eyess)) , Sweetheart is on top and they're fucking deep throating his cock so well he tells them to go slower or else he'll cum too quickly and they're like, ok and?? , he just laughs and then they just plant themselves on his face
Then Milo's got his hands wrapped around their thighs and is NOT letting them go, occasionally he'll have his hand caress up their spine to see them squirm and he'll wrap his hand in their hair, pulling back gently, to see them arch
Even like this he can't resist to spank and grab at their ass, especially if they're fucking SITTING ON HIM (insert that one meme of Doja Cat about big noses)
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When they finally cum, Milo kinda shakes his face against them to get every last drop, his tongue swirling everywhere. This man needs their cum.
And Sweetheart makes him cum when they take his cock as far as it'll go and stay there until that cock is done pumping in their mouth.
They are both cum slutsI MEAN WHATAATTEEJEJDIEJOJ
I'm done yapping goodnight
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bratphilia · 1 year ago
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teacher (m. schmidt x reader)
request: "Can you plz plz write a smut where Mike takes readers virginity and they are kind of innocent"
note: sorry if this was a lil shorter than you were hoping. i left some breathing room at the end for a potential second part
pairing: mike schmidt x reader
tags: fingering, missionary, virgin!reader, soft dom!mike
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"this is your clit," mike says, pressing on the sensitive area.
your hips jolt. "o-okay," you whine, struggling in his grasp.
abby is at vanessa's house to be babysat so you and mike are left alone at his place. mike has you resting half way on top of him with one hand on your leg to remind you to keep them spread for him. you decided that today's the day you want to go all the way with him, much to his concern to your change of heart. however, you managed to convince him that you were ready. 
the truth is, mike's been wanting this for awhile. he just finds your innocence so cute! the way you're a bit of a prude, blushing and shying away from anything related to sex. he finds it adorable. he finds youadorable.
he slowly moves the finger resting on your clit down south until it prods at your hole. he kisses your forehead and then your cheek as if to prepare you for what comes next. 
"ooh," you exhale shakily. it's an admittedly discomforting stretch, but thankfully he eases you into it gently. he's such a caring boyfriend. 
once the finger is inside, he curls it, earning a sharp "ah!" from you. 
"...and this is your g-spot."
"th-that feels nice, mikey," you say, reaching a hand to grasp his t-shirt while he curls and uncurls his finger. 
"yeah?" he mumbles, slightly mocking your voice. 
mike pumps his finger a little faster and reaches another hand to rub slow circles around your clit. you grasp onto his arm and whimper. 
"m-mike — mike! — i feel weird..." you cry.
instead of slowing down, he actually goes a little faster. your slick provides for a perfect lube to do so. "shh, it's okay. just let it go, okay?"
he presses the hand rubbing on your clit on your tummy, gently pressing down. the heat in your stomach grows until you feel some sort of release and a pulsing in your pussy. you moan loudly when he kisses you. 
you feel yourself dripping onto his finger and your face burns. "'m sorry." 
he gives you a lopsided grin. "what are you sorry for?"
you shake your head and he begins to unbuckle his belt and discard his pants and boxers. you tug on his shirt for him to take it off and he does so, pecking your lips before and after. 
"still good to continue?" he checks. god, he's so good to you. 
you nod and he slides on top of you. his dick prods at your entrance. "i'm going to go slow, okay? it's gonna hurt at first but that's just you adjusting."
"and we can stop at anytime, right?" you ask.
"of course."
he pushes in slow as he promised. you let out a flurry of 'ah's as the burning sensation of your walls stretching hits you overwhelmingly. fuck, you're so tight. he was expecting you to be — you were tight when he put his finger in — but he doesn't feel confident he can really move inside of you that much. 
he's buried about halfway inside and waits for your call to move. "you're — ugh — so fucking tight," he can't help but comment.
"is — is that a good thing?" you wonder out loud.
"very," he says with a pained chuckle. 
you take a deep breath after a few moments. "'m ready." 
mike begins to thrust slowly and cautiously. his cock drags against your walls pleasurably enough for the both of you. the noises your making, squeals, whines, and cries, makes him want to go faster and illicit more, but being careful with you is far more important than his primal needs.
he recalls your reactions to the way he talked to you, so he leans down to whisper in your ear. "you like that, baby? like feeling me inside you?"
"yes," you moan. 
his shallow thrusts are still enough to make the cheap bed creak and rock. "fuckin' god, babe, you feel so good wrapped around me."
"baby," you cry. "can you go a little faster? i can — ah! — take it." 
"yeah? does my baby want it faster?" he mocks you as he picks up the pace ever so slightly.
"mikey!" you cry from the stimulation.
"gettin' close, baby?" he asks.
"mmm! i think so..."
like before when you were close — and he can tell you are by the way you're spasming around him — he brings his hand to your clit and rubs from side to side. you grip desperately onto him as you feel the same way you did before: the tension in your stomach growing like a dam about to break loose. 
"ah! ah!" you moan and spill over the edge. 
mike holds off from coming himself, for now and pulls out. this was about you, not him. besides, he'll teach you how to use his mouth on him some other time anyway.
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ladykailitha · 29 days ago
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A Love Connection Part 5
Hey, guys! You really seem to be loving this story! Yay. This is the first of two today as the next chapter will be posted later tonight.
Just a heads up Billy's introduction is very indicative of his attitude throughout the whole thing.
@tartarusknight 's tags made me laugh because how spot on their assessment of the three Suitors was.
In this we get a feel for each of the contestants and Steve is already done with this shit. I won't put a warning up here, but this does have a lot of more adult themed questions for a dating show. Mainly because I figure it's on a streaming service.
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4
~
“All righty!” Bob said with a bright smile. “We have three rounds in which our lovely Suitors will earn points and two of our Suitors will get a chance to win a date with our Catch! The first round is the all around where our Suitors will each have a chance to answer a question from our Catch. The one with best answer will get three points, second place will get two, and the last place will get only one.”
The audience clapped and cheered.
“The second round is our lightning round. Our Catch will ask either or question that the Suitors will have to answer quickly. For each answer that matches our Catch they’ll receive a tally. The one with the most tallies will get five points, the second will get three, and last place will get one.”
The audience again clapped and cheered.
“Then in the heart to heart round, our Catch will get to ask each contestant five questions and then will rate the answer from one to three. A one will get our Suitor three points, a two will get you two points and three, only one.”
The audience again clapped and cheered.
“And now our lightning round!”
Steve was told to just call out all the either or questions he felt spoke to him as they handed him a list of the thirty plus.
He called Dustin’s first. “Star Wars or Star Trek.”
All three picked Star Wars. And all three got a tally.
He just started calling out the ones as he saw them on the page.
“Silver or gold.”
“Cat or dog.”
That one had been a bit divisive considering Steve owned a cat and of the three only Tommy was a cat person. Bob winced at that one. “Ooh. That one hurts.”
Steve could only agree.
“Bondage or blindfold.”
“For me or you?” Billy asked before answering.
“All the questions are for the Suitor, not the Catch,” Bob explained. “You are trying to match with your Catch. But in this case it would what you want to do with the Catch whether you were the one it being done to or not.”
No one was surprised when Billy picked bondage. Tommy did, too. Eddie being the only one to get a tally for that one for the blindfold.
“Camping or the beach.”
Again only Eddie got a tally on that one. Steve lived in Indiana where there weren’t a lot of sandy beaches but lots of great places to go camping.
“Give or receive a blowjob.”
Eddie snorted and Steve could almost imagine a little smirk on his face. All three preferred receiving and so none of them got a tally.
Bob laughed. “I think that’s actually a good thing. Stevie here can give his final Suitor the best bj after all this.”
Steve was again grateful for the Suitors not being able to see his face as he blushed a dark red.
“Vampires or werewolves.”
Only Billy got a tally for that one as Tommy and Eddie both picked vampires.
The game continued until finally Steve called out his last either or question: “Taylor Swift or Beyonce.”
Eddie snorted again. “Billie Eilish. But if I have to pick a billionaire, definitely Taylor Swift.”
The audience laughed.
Steve laughed, too and happily gave Eddie the only tally as the other two picked Beyonce for Chrissy’s question.
The final rundown of points after everything was added up, Tommy with five points for having the most tallies, Eddie with three for coming in second, and Billy with only one. Tommy barely beating Eddie by two tallies.
~
They took a lunch break after they filmed that and Steve was whisked off to a dressing room where a nice girl named Vickie brought him all his food and two bottles of water to sooth his throat after talking so much.
Steve was a little bit more nervous about this portion of the game. The questions would start fun and go deeper or in some cases spicier.
“Everyone knows the first question,” Bob said as if they didn’t just spend two grueling hours answering either or questions.
“What would be your ideal first date?” the audience roared.
“Damn straight!” Bob said. “Or in this case, damn gay!”
The audience laughed, but Steve squirmed in his seat.
“I would drive up your place in my shiny red 1969 Camero,” Billy said, low and seductive. “Then I would take you to a five star restaurant and order the most expensive wine. Then I would take you to my hotel room and fuck you into the mattress until our neighbors call in a noise complaint.”
“Oooh,” Bob said, “already starting off hot.”
“I would take you to my private jet,” Tommy answered, “and wine and dine all the way to Paris where we would have breakfast on the balcony of a French villa and make love as the sun rises on Paris.”
“Fancy and romantic,” Bob said with a saucy wink at the camera.
“For a first date?” Eddie mused. “I’d find out all your favorite foods and drinks from your best friend and then we’d go on a picnic complete with a blanket and a six pack of your favorite beer. Then we’d go miniature golfing and then your favorite diner for dinner where we share an old fashioned milk shake. Then I would walk you to your door where I would hope for a goodbye kiss.”
Steve’s jaw dropped. He had never heard such a perfect date in his life. Even Bob was speechless. He just kept glancing at Steve and the camera just back and forth as everyone was stunned by the answer.
“I think we all know who’s getting the three points for this question,” Bob finally said. “Steve tell us who came in second and last place please.”
“Billy in second,” Steve said, “and Tommy in third. I’ve been to Paris, whatever it was when it was named the city of love, it certainly isn’t now.”
Again Eddie snorted and Steve was starting to think he had the same sense of humor as him.
“What is your favorite sports team?” Steve asked Lucas’s question.
“LA Lakers,” was Billy’s reply.
While Tommy said, “Chicago Bulls.”
Steve face fell. He didn’t like either of those teams.
“I’m not much of a sports fan,” Eddie admitted, “but my favorite thing to do growing up was watching the Hoosiers with my Uncle Wayne, because I got to spend time just him and me. So I’m going to say Hoosiers.”
The audience went ‘awww.’
Steve choked up. “That was a beautiful answer, Eddie. The Hoosiers are my favorite team, too. Three points to you. Two to Tommy, and one to Billy.”
Billy grumbled something his mic didn’t quite catch.
“What’s your favorite pick up line?” was Steve’s next question. This one was Robin’s question. She thought it would get some cheesy answers.
“I’m Billy.”
Bob snorted, but wisely said nothing. The audience however seemed to agree with Billy.
“I have a private jet, just say the word and we can be in Paris by breakfast.”
Bob blinked for a moment. “Does that really work?”
“Oh yeah.”
Steve shivered at Tommy’s smarmy tone.
“This must be a museum,” Eddie said into the resulting awkward silence, “because baby, you’re a work of art.”
Steve laughed. There was the cheesy answer he had been expecting. But the top points ended up going to Billy for the sheer balls of that one. Eddie did come in second though.
He went through a few boring questions like favorite book or quote to go with some of the spicier questions.
Then he asked his last question of day one.
“Do you consider yourself a good person?”
All three men are shocked into a stunned silence.
“That’s one hell of a question, boys,” Bob said, “how about it?”
Eddie actually being the first to speak.
“I try to be,” he murmured close to his microphone, “but without a doubt I wish I was better than I am.”
Tommy laughed and quoted ‘Firefly’ complete with him saying stab between each downgrade.
Steve chuckled a bit at that one.
Billy scoffed. “I’m no philosopher, I don’t get into shit like that. But yeah, I’m good person. Fuck you.”
Steve gave Tommy the top points on that one, with Eddie again coming second. Billy was not happy with coming in third. Again.
The director called cut and Bob said, “Ooh. We can’t have you saying the eff word, but I’m not sure if they’ll bleep it or cut it.”
“Whatever.”
Now Steve was absolutely eaten up with curiosity about what these dudes looked like.
He would find out soon enough.
~
After eating at the hotel restaurant, Steve went back to the hotel and called Robin.
“Hey, Robbie,” he murmured, flopping on to the bed.
“Hey, dingus,” she said softly. “I’ve Chrissy here with me, so I’m going to put you on speaker.”
“Hi, Stevie,” Chrissy cooed. “You have any idea who are going to be the final two yet?”
“Oh yeah,” Steve huffed, playing with the tassels on the decorative pillow. “Because unless Suitor number one gets his head out of his ass, it’s bye bye birdie. Dude is so full of himself and only interested in how much sex he can get. I’m really dreading the final round when I have to start asking personal questions for each one.”
“Why’s that?” Robin asked. “Or can’t you tell us with all the NDA crap.”
“NDA crap,” Steve said, resigned. “But I can say that Suitor number three is the one I hope gets at least to the dating portion. His answers were so cute. He sounds like an absolute dork.”
“Perfect for you then,” Chrissy agreed. “Tell us about everything else. The hotel, dinner, the clothes you got to wear.”
So Steve did and by the time they had worn out every topic it was late. They all needed to be up early the next morning so they said good night.
Steve got ready for bed.
He slept fitfully, dreaming of three large shadows looming over him and laughing as he fell into the abyss.
~
The hair and makeup lady certainly had her work cut out for her when Steve arrived that morning. She gave his shoulder a quick squeeze.
“Everyone sleeps badly on filming days,” she assured him. “It’s all the anxiety. You aren’t making my job harder by having not slept, okay?”
Steve nodded and let her do her work. By the time she was done, he looked exactly the same as he did yesterday.
He was impressed and told him so.
“You’re sweet, sugar,” she murmured. “Now, go knock ‘em dead!”
Steve got into his little booth and sat down.
“You ready for day two?” Bob asked, stroking his tie like he had the day before.
He shook his head.
Bob laughed and counted down with his fingers, three, two, one!
The first question on his little cue card read: “What would you do if someone important to me called while we were in the middle of sex?”
“I’d hit the text me button and toss the phone on the laundry pile,” Billy said. “Whatever it is, it can wait.”
Tommy chuckled. “I would answer it for you and tell them that unless this was an emergency, my dick up your ass is slightly more important and then hang up. If it’s important, they’ll call back.”
Bob and Steve shared wide-eyed expressions over that one.
“I’d let you answer it,” Eddie said softly. “Your people are important to you. I would hope, however, that you would chose to continue to go back to doing what we were doing if it wasn’t essential right then, though.”
“Fair enough,” Steve said with a huff a laughter. “Three points to Eddie, two to Billy, and one to Tommy.”
There was a little murmuring of surprise from the audience on that one. But Steve felt that Billy’s wasn’t as rude as Tommy’s was. Telling them to text wasn’t as bad as being lewd about it.
That would be the last time that happened, much to Steve’s dismay.
When asked about what they wore to bed, Billy said he was naked, Tommy said that he wore a silken matching set of pajamas with matching eye mask. Eddie said that he wore an old band t-shirt and Garfield pajama pants. Steve immediately was endeared. Billy also came in second place on that one.
When asked about their favorite act of foreplay, Billy didn’t do foreplay, Tommy was all for getting blown, and Eddie’s was even sweeter than the last. He said he enjoyed stripping his partner and kiss every inch of newly exposed skin.
The audience was starting to get excited as Billy began to pull into a dead heat with Tommy, though Eddie was clearly in the lead.
Then came time for the final question of round one. God that felt weird to say considering they had already done round two.
“What would you do if the house we recently moved into,” Steve said, leaning forward to the microphone, “and I believed it was legitimately haunted and was scared?”
This was Will’s question and he loved it. It really spoke volumes about a person.
“I’d buy you a new house, baby,” Billy said. “You think it’s haunted, then fuck let’s get the hell out of there.”
Steve was little surprised on that one. He would have thought that Billy would have been the one to tell him that it was all in his head.
The audience clapped in appreciation, too.
“I’d hire a priest to bless the house,” Tommy said, “before anything else. We just bought it, I wouldn’t want to give up a new investment so easily.”
“Uh...” Eddie said sheepishly. “I’ve always wanted a haunted house. And like it would suck, because you were scared and shit, but it would be so cool to live in haunted house. So I’d try to make friends with so it would stop being mean to you.”
That was the sweetest dorkiest thing Steve had ever heard, but it was also the most insensitive of the bunch and no one was surprised when Billy and Tommy were one and two respectively.
Bob smiled. “Can’t win them all, Eddie. You’ve been batting a thousand this round.” He turned to the audience. “Eddie got forty points that round, with Tommy and Billy almost at a dead heat with twenty-five each.”
“So with the totals of the two rounds, Eddie is in the lead at forty-five points, Tommy at twenty-eight, and Billy at twenty-six. But the next round is anybody’s game. Each Suitor will be asked one question and based on how well our lovely Catch Steve likes the answer they can get anywhere from one to three points. Get ready for the final round!”
They broke for lunch like they did yesterday and Steve was exhausted. He was almost too tired to eat, but he forced himself to eat and drink, for the energy if nothing else. He certainly was going to need it.
He buried his head in hands. He wasn’t sure if it was going to be worth it in the end. He was so worn out. He could only hope the Suitors were as tired as he was. He didn’t even know if they got to go out and enjoy the city while he was stuck in his hotel room every night.
He let the makeup lady retouch his makeup and he put on his best parent teacher conference face and stepped back out onto the stage.
~
Part 6 Part 7 Part 8
Tag List: CLOSED
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2- @gregre369 ​@a-little-unsteddie @chaosgremlinmunson @messrs-weasley @cryptid-system
3- @maya-custodios-dionach @goodolefashionedloverboi @val-from-lawrence @carlyv @wonderland-girl143-blog
4- @justforthedead89 @irregular-child @bookbinderbitch @bookworm0690 @forgottenkanji
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9- @dreamercec @wheneverfeasible @themoonagainstmers @garden-of-gay @little-birch-boy
10- @ollieolive @dissociatingdemon @stripey82 @kultiras @micheledawn1975
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mysteryshoptls · 7 months ago
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R Ace Trappola - Luxe Couture Vignette
"My perception just lagged hard"
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[Fairest City – Crystal Galleria]
Ace: Alright, it's finally the free roam time I've been waiting for! That brand-name shop looks good, and so does that one… But I think I'll have to pass on 'em!
Azul: Oh? You don't plan on visiting those stores?
Ace: I mean, I'm not anywhere close to being able to afford all those high-brand clothes. But you already knew that when you asked, right, Azul-senpai?
Ace: But it's not like I've completely given up on doing any shopping, though. I'm thinkin' about checkin' out some of the secondary line shops.
Azul: Ah, yes, there are many high-end brands that are developing products aimed at the broader marked instead of just their main audience.
Ace: Yeah, yeah. I did some digging after heading back to the hotel yesterday, and…
Ace: Looks to me like those secondary line shops have fits that suit me better.
Azul: Hm. And what sort of look do you tend to like, Ace-san?
Ace: I guess my likes reflect my usual getup. I dress pretty casual.
Ace: I like clothes that are easy to move around in, and aren't really high-maintenance. And I can't really deal with looks that are too stiff.
Ace: I'd probably say that most of my outfits have a splash of the current trends, but also have a bit of an edge to it.
Ace: On the other hand, I can only imagine you wearing pretty stiff and formal stuff.
Azul: I suppose. Of course, it does depend on the time and occasion.
Ace: Maaan, I know you got some real good sense about these things. It'd be greaaat if you could tag along and pick out some clothes for me~
Azul: Well, let me see… I do have some interest in how those secondary line brands develop their merchandise.
Azul: There's no reason for me to not join you as I observe their establishments. HOWEVER! You will, of course, be paying for yourself.
Ace: Tch. Guess he saw right through me. Suuucks.
Ace: Oh well, let's go, then.
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Ace: Hmmm, where's the store I was checking out yesterday…? Oh, found it. Azul-senpai, it's over here.
Azul: The store does seem to have a grand appearance, yes… But I can see that the designs here are rather different from the signature line.
Ace: Looks pretty good, huh? Let's go in!
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Ace: Woah, check out this stylish sweater! The shape's pretty good, and I bet it'd work with all sorts of outfits. And the price…
Ace: ONLY 30,000 MADOL [300 Thaumarks]! THAT'S SO CHEAP!
Azul: Calm yourself, Ace-san. Is 30,000 Madol for one sweater considered cheap to you?
Ace: ACK, WAIT, NO, THAT'S NOT CHEAP! WHEW, THAT WAS CLOSE~
Ace: After seeing all those Luxe prices set for the rich and famous, I guess my perception just lagged hard.
Ace: But I think I should be able to buy at least one thing from this shop with my pocket money.
Ace: Azul-senpai, I'm countin' on you to pick out something nice for me.
Azul: What do you think about that black blazer on the mannequin over there? It has a stunning silhouette.
Ace: Ooh, you're right. It's got a pretty slender and sleek profile!
Azul: Underneath it… How about this collared white shirt? It would probably look good with a striped tie, as well.
Azul: If you combine it with these center-pressed slacks and leather shoes, you would do well in any establishment that requires a dress code.
Ace: Cool, I woulda expected nothing less from something you've selected, Azul-senpai. Pretty formal and mature.
Ace: It's a pretty different look than what I normally would go for, but I guess I should at least give it a try.
Azul: I am pleased you like it.
Ace: If I were to buy everything that you chose for me… Urgh, that's over 100,000 Madol [1,000 Thaumarks]!
Azul: Well, this might be a secondary line, but it is still a brand-named shop.
Ace: Hrrrngh, maybe I'll do just this blazer… It's not really something I already own or anything.
Ace: And black pretty much goes with anything, so it makes it easy to come up with outfits…
Ace: It's a shorter style, too, so it might actually go for a casual look with my hoody and jeans.
Azul: That is a combination that hadn't even crossed my mind… Yet, I agree, I'm sure it would suit you immensely.
Ace: So that look would be like a combination of our two fashion senses, then.
Ace: If it's just the blazer, I think I could just barely afford it, but… My funds when I return to campus'll be pretty low…
Ace: Ooh, I have an idea! Can you let me work some hours at the Mostro Lounge?
Ace: I can be pretty good with my hands. You've seen that before, right, Azul-senpai?
Azul: Yes, of course. And we have a mountain load of tasks to be done. I look forward to your wonderful hard work, Ace-san.
Ace: …Shoot. Did I just put myself up for something I shouldn't have?
Ace: Uhhh… Hope you'll go easy on me~
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Requested by @ordinaryanon.
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mrsjellymunson · 3 months ago
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Say Hello To My Little Friend
Written for the @steddiemicrofic August prompt ‘plug’ | WC: 437 | Rating: M | CW: Secret crush, embarrassment, mentions of a sex toy | Tags: mishearing/misunderstanding, getting together. Mature content below the cut, MDNI.
“You’d really want one?”
“Yeah, I definitely want a plug…”
The seniors’ keggers were loud, but overhearing Steve yell that over the clamour was something Eddie never expected.
His birthday was coming up, so perhaps this year Eddie would find the ideal present, something so-very-Steve, but that also says, by the way, I like you.
Eddie spends ages scouring his favourite shops, looking for the perfect butt plug for his crush, if such a thing even exists. He settles on something in sleek black silicone, a nice size for a beginner but also functional. With rhinestones on the end, because nothing's too good for his princess.
On Steve's birthday the gang gathers in his backyard. Food is consumed and Steve gets his presents. But this year Eddie hangs back, nervous. He sidles up to Steve late in the afternoon.
“I, uh… I have something for you, but I need to give it to you… in private.”
“Ooh. Is it…?”
Eyebrows bouncing, Steve pinches his thumb and forefinger together, waggling a giant invisible blunt.
“N-no, it’s…”
Before Eddie can explain that it’s significantly more personal, there’s a sudden furore. Amongst a chorus of squeals Robin appears - with a puppy in her arms. It’s unusual-looking, with a squashed face and a passing resemblance to Winston Churchill (and Dustin’s baby photos, but nobody brings that up). Steve rushes over, grinning, petting it and asking,
“Who’s this??”
Robin replies,
“She’s for you! A birthday gift from me and your folks.”
Steve’s beside himself, cooing at the furry bundle as Robin explains to everyone about the rescue pound two towns over, and how Steve’s parents helped with the adoption from afar, delighted for Steve to have company as they’re so often away.
Eventually leaving the puppy playing with the kids, Steve follows Eddie when he retreats for a cigarette, getting him alone.
“So, where’s my present?”
“Uhh, Steve, I-”
Steve lunges for Eddie’s jacket pocket, pulling out a prettily wrapped parcel and tearing it open before Eddie can stop him.
Handling the smooth silicone, Steve’s initially aghast, then intrigued, and finally confused.
“Wait, is this because of what I said at the party? When I told Robin I wanted a Pug!”
Eddie’s mortified, heat building in his chest and spreading up his neck.
“Yeah, I know that now. Please, don’t make this worse…”
He goes to move away, but Steve grabs his jacket, stopping him. He slides his hand down to Eddie’s hip, gently squeezing.
“Y’know, I’ve actually always wanted one of these too.”
Stepping closer, he adds, voice low,
“You’re gonna have to show me how to use it, though.”
🐶
PSA: Please adopt, don’t shop. Also, neuter your pets.
Thanks so much for reading!
My masterlist
Tagging my usuals, ILY all: @joejoequinnquinn @jamdoughnutmagician @guiltyasquinn @madaboutmunson @airen256 @sunshinepeachx @the-unforgivenn @skrzydlak @comeonatmebruh @jamiecb66 @80s-addict @abellmunsonmovie @definitionwanderlust @sheneedsrocknroll92 @munson-blurbs @wonderlanddreamer @daisy-munson @maedesculpaeusoubi @kurdtbean @mediocredreams
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gabessquishytum · 5 months ago
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Ooh! Imagine Dreamling if Hob was like. One of Death’s assistants/subjects. Like how Dream has ravens but for Death 🥺
This is such a galaxy brain concept!!!! Kind of love the idea of Death having a guy who tags along with her while she's working?? Like in Supernatural they had reapers who worked for Death. Maybe Hob is one of them. He's technically actually a deceased human being but Death made him a reaper because he was really sad about dying. And now him and Death are besties!
Death thinks that her little brother Dream needs to meet new people, and so she starts making excuses for Hob and Dream to meet. Like she'll send Hob to the dreaming with a message. One time she told Hob to take Dream a particularly nice selection of pastries, to appeal to his sweet tooth. And Hob would be mad about his status as a glorified delivery boy buuuuut. Dream is super hot. Hob doesn't get much opportunity to meet cute boys considering his job, so he absolutely takes every opportunity to flirt! And as much as Dream pretends to be infinitely irritated by this loud-mouth former human showing up on the shores of creation, he's actually quite fond of Hob.
And if Dream happened to be captured at some point, and his siblings were unable to interfere, well, there's nothing to say that a certain reaper couldn't liberate him from the fishbowl while sending Roderick Burgess off to the sunless lands. It was no big deal!
(The kiss that he got from Dream as a thank you was totally a big deal... as was the shovel talk he got from Death afterwards. Hob is just thrilled that Dream holds his hand on the shores of creation these days, instead of ignoring him. Theyre taking it slow, and thats ok! <3)
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aziraphales-library · 1 month ago
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Hi,
Could I ask for some roommate fics? A little pining is great but I'm not a huge fan of too much angst.
There is one roommate fic I remember that I'd love to find again, it was set during lockdown, and azirphale was a virgin but was talking to Agnes on zoom with plans to date. Crowley offers to teach him about sex, and it gets physical, even though they're straight buddies ..of course. 😏
Thankyou
We have a #roommates tag. Here's the one you're looking for and a few more to add...
Not a Mounted Dildo but a Fuck Machine by NaroMoreau, summerofspock (E)
Aziraphale and Crowley have lived together for three years when lockdown goes into effect. When Aziraphale meets a nice girl on Tinder who he thinks is his perfect match, he's delighted. There's just one hurdle: that pesky virginity thing. Lucky for him, Crowley has always been there for him. He's helped Aziraphale with every other problem through the years, why not this one?
Tinder Dates Gone Wrong by OceanLace (E)
Aziraphale decides to take a risk and brings a man home but doesn't realize that his roommate and best friend had the same idea. Things don't turn out the way either of them were expecting but end up exactly how they wanted.
Principles of Proximity by Cannebady (E)
Crowley's plan is to get through grad school in one piece and then live his bachelor dream life. With a less-than-wholesome upbringing and no real human ties to speak of, he's made a life for himself. It's just fine, actually. And he's fine too, while you're at it. Enter new roommate, Aziraphale, who just might teach him the benefits of putting down roots.
…And They Were Roommates by Mimsynims (E)
“You know… I just remembered that Richard and I were going away for a few days next month.” Something devious came over him. “Richard paid for it, but the booking is in my name.” Crowley quickly caught on to what he was getting at. “Ooh, I see. That’s convenient.” He grinned. “For us." When Aziraphale's boyfriend Richard (Dick) breaks up with him, he and his roommate Crowley hijacks an intended couples' vacation and uses it for themselves. Lines that had started to blur even before their trip gets even more blurry - which perhaps isn't the best thing when both are hiding a crush on the other (and communication isn't their strong suit).
make it with you by NaroMoreau (E)
PAID RESEARCH OPPORTUNITY: A romantic couples study!! ------ Aziraphale and Crowley are broke roommates who are struggling to keep up with rent and a harsh landlord. After Crowley loses his job and Aziraphale's bookshop hasn't managed to make enough profit, they'll resort to anything to save what they love, and when they come across with the idea of a paid study for couples... Because some ideas are good until they aren't.
You Can Stay At My Place (And We Can Fall in Love) by IneffableToreshi (E)
Anthony Crowley is an art student with a heart of gold and a broad assumption about himself and his own (apparent lack-of) sexuality. When he meets literary student Aziraphale, he thinks he's found a great friend and possibly the perfect roommate. But when an exceptionally idiotic idea turns into Aziraphale reluctantly agreeing to pretend to be Crowley's boyfriend, Crowley rapidly realizes that he may not have been nearly so asexual as he originally thought...
10,000 Hours by AnnaTheHank (E)
Rich playboy Anthony Crowley has finally broken the last straw. He's been disowned by his grandmother, and turned away by his family. With no money and no where to go, he heads to the old family cabin to lay low until it all blows over. Romance writer A.Z. Fell has been given use of her publisher's cabin to get away from the city and work on her newest book-her first erotica. Neither expected the other to be there, but there they both were. And AZ finds that Crowley's vast knowledge of sex may just make up for her own lacking knowledge when it comes to writing her book.
- Mod D
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