#On the border of day and night
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Also it brings me zero pleasure to be Cassandra here, but “mass deportation” is a synonym for murder. I need you all to understand this. Even in the absolute best case scenario, it means large numbers of people being warehoused in slapdash facilities where illness spreads quickly and medical care is inadequate. It means government contractors providing food, trying to make a killing, and inevitably cutting corners on costs/quality/safety. It means police violence against people being rounded up. It means US citizen children being removed from their families or deported with them. It means people being returned to countries they fled in fear of their lives, and killed by domestic abusers/gangs/governments. It means bureaucratic mixups (/apathy/malice) that result in people getting dropped off in dangerous cities that they’ve never even visited late at night.
It means all of this and more, and if the government comes for your neighbors you should respond as if you are witnessing an attempted murder.
#lines on a map#us politics#usa continues having an extremely normal one#my posts#and while i’m here i hope biden harris et al go to sleep every night with the knowledge that they ran hard to the right on immigration#for absolutely ZERO gain except fox news calling them unhinged open borders leftists every minute of every day#regardless of the fact that they were running a lightly airbrushed version of the stephen miller playbook#why yes i’m full of white hot rage about this how could you tell
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outtakes from my rita skeeter character study i did feverishly at 4am last night/this morning
#my delusional princess with a disorder#worlds worst person with narcissistic tendencies#only still alive out of sheer force of will and spite#mediocre journalist and writer with huge dreams and an ego the size of the universe#will sleep her way to the top#genuinely believe shes ’self made’ and ’rags to riches’ when in reality bella’s presence is giving her work and status and clout#she sleeps like 3h a night and wakes up with a cigarette hanging from her lips and face pressed against her notebooks#the type of person who lies to herself so often that shes gaslighting herself into believing it#’god ive been working so hard’ <— girl who stayed in bed all day staring at a notebook and chainsmoking#eventually gave up all together and decided to watch a kathrine hepburn film instead#but she genuinely believes no one is doing it like her…….#she doesnt ever cook only orders in#her flat is a mess and bordering on gross#she hasnt slept in her own bed in a year she always falls asleep at her desk or in her armchair#fails every single job interview and is off putting and intense#MY GIRL THE LOVE OF MY LIFE#rita skeeter#rita
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sirius who overhears someone using the phrase sick as a dog for the first time and getting offended on behalf of all dogs and remus who it takes a truly horrific amount of time to explain it as a muggle thing because he can’t stop laughing at the face sirius made
#this is bordering on a shitpost i wont lie#wolfstar#remus lupin#sirius black#marauders era#posting day and night
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Fyodor/Nikolai/Sigma, domestic au, but they are painfully slavic and living their best lives, is something that can be so personal.
(this post took forever cause I essentially had to make it twice. I didn't look at what blog I originally posted this to the first time round. shoot me)
#the mixture of Russian. Ukrainian. and Polish would be so beautiful and so messy dear lord#they go to church at least every sunday if not more. Fyodor tunes into a radio midnight mass. Sigma veils when he goes to church#they all help cook so every night is fusion night. they scrounged up an *old* cookbook somewhere cause none of them had any family they-#close enough to to get an authentic grandma's cook book. so they make do with what they've got#they all speak all three languages#they believe in *every* slavic superstituion and piece of folklore. its actually like. hard to exist. they're bordering being annoying with#i say lovingly#breakfast is their favorite time of day. they make fancy teas and kiss and read the paper with the radio going#fyodor has a library of old slavic literature#fyodor and nikolai almost only go by fedya and kolya#nikolai lives up to the smoking/alcohol addiction stereotype and he's proud of it#this post is made by a polish slav that is only just starting to reconnect with the culture my family tried to bury so bare with-#the sparsity please. any suggestions would be lovely!#slavic is a blanket term#slavic#sigma#sigma bsd#sigma bungou stray dogs#bsd sigma#(implied) fem sigma#fyodor dostoevsky#bsd fyodor#fyodor dostoyevsky bsd#nikolai gogol#bsd nikolai#sigfoylai#siglai#fyolai#fyosig#bsd
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poorly held together condolences,
drowning out the Northern Lights,
pay more for old advice,
open eyed entangled in promises,
buried under dying homes,
hands tied in golden thorn.
#wilderlore#barclay thorne#the night compass#thought I’d post this a few days before the book releases#for anyone curious the song is aura by ghost and pals#I put the tarot card numbers instead of the titles because it was too small sorry#Yasha is the Hermit and Audrian is the Devil if you wanna know#and if you look really close the flowery border is supposed to represent the mysterious nature lore Barclay can sense#this was a pain to render too istg 😭
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Recent game related things .. hrmm...
#I do like the inconsistency of the first map. that is actually something older but that I re-found and added to my Game Reference stuff#so that when characters reference where they're from I can be accurate. I like that the whole map is kind of shifted up that way. Where the#actual south part doesnt even count as the south since its Too Far and Scary lol. and if you say you're from 'the north' thats basically#like.. one single continent. Though some people do make distinctions like 'north midlands' or etc. still. I like the ways that common#language isn't always precisely accurate like that. and thinking about why a culture would classify things a certain way or etc. etc.#The inventory page is so funny to me because it's literally just the BASe like.. sample layout just to make sure it works properly with 0#actual design into it. just colored rectangles thrown together in MS paint. but what if I like... left it like that.. what if all the other#art in the game and UI is like stylized and fully matching BUT the inventory/journal/etc. screens I just left as plain colored blocks#with random misalignments and black spots and etc gjhbhjj... It looks unfinished in a Funny Contrast way to me.#the wordcounts are just like... my past few days of writing.. I am still not getting 2200 words a day done or whatever I needed. I'm lucky#if it's even half of that .... tee hee.. :3c I do also keep having appointments and other things going on but..grrr...#The full map of the area is probably not necessary but I thought it would be more realisitc if people were able to reference things. Like i#you have people all living in a city area probably at some point someone might mention a neighboring city or some landmark nearby#or etc. so I thought having at least the basic names of what's around for reference would be sensible. A side character mentioning#'oh yeah I don't live here full time I just travel from Marisene sometimes' or whatever makes it seem more like a Real#Fleshed Out Place than people just making vague references like 'the river' or 'i come from a city nearby' or 'i went to a place somewhere#around here' or 'the other city' or etc. lol.. Especially since global cities/global areas are weird as they operate almost like an#independent country within their walls. so it's like a micro country inside of another country usually. just plopped down in some agreed#upon plot of land that won't be too disruptive to the main country around it. That could get very complex depending on the cultural and#political backdrop of where they're placed (though obviously they try to choose the 'easiest' areas possible for it). Asen is a very mild#country without much history of conflict or anything so it's fine. But still interesting that Sifeh and the entire branched out global area#border three other districts of Asen. Which means like 3 times the local representitives you'l have to negotiate with for some major change#or anything. I think one of the 'random characters you can find around the world and have short discussions with just to make the area#feel more populated and real even though theyre not actual important npcs' is going to be a guy who actually serves on the council that#handles running the global areas and he's like.. some perpetually exhausted middle aged elf running around with a clipboard or whatever#ANYWAY...... hrgh... still trying to write when I can....#I WISH so badly that I had the scope for a simple character creation menu and all character interactions would allot for the background#of your player character. And also to have a simple day night cycle where places in the world you explore/people you talk to during the day#have new options or dialogue at night.. BUT alas... I already am so behind on everything as is lol.. aughhh... T o T#As the worlds number one Needless Detail And Complexity Enjoyer i must dilligently prevent myself from adding additional complexity
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damn kind of had a crazy week as just some villager who lives in a place so small that its name alone would dox me
#first day at work i could leave early so i went and got another piercing about it and then i tagged along to the middle of the#bordering country for a day in 32 degree weather which was definitely a good decision from us and then i had#my aunt's funeral and the person i hate most in my life showed up too and then i had some 10 hour work shifts and then#i went to the capital for pride and went to a club night where i danced what my watch says was a total of 30km and went home the next day#of course no extra trains and it was also half an hour late ✌️ only home at like half past ten this morning#if it had been a week day then the first train woudlve gone 2 hours earlier. insane that there were no extra trains for such a big event#man this week lasted a year#apparently several people died last night at the capital 😭 the big city is crazy and its not even big for foreign standards.#all while i walked about 4km at 4am by myself to the station
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the scene in yakuza 5 where shinada and milky dance on the roof talking about how they should run away and start over in a new town with new jobs and new lives, only for milky to abruptly stop and let shinada go when she gets called back downstairs to work, while shinada is sent stumbling by suddenly being let go until he too comes to a stop, burns a hole in my brain
#rambles#yakuza#yakuza liveblogging#like man. MAN. that shit hits home#milky saying 'i wanna be a teacher this time- that was my dream as a kid!'#and shinada replying 'you can! nothings stopping you! you can start over!' with a tone that borders on hysterical#he's so desperate to believe it's possible because in that moment he can see it- he sees his way out#for a moment he's blind to all the things that have kept him from doing exactly what he's proposing every other time he's considered it#hes trapped in a glass house- he can see freedom but knows he cant reach it. but for a moment he lets himself forget the glass is there#but milky doesnt. she thinks hes being cute and plays along but as soon as she lets him go the music cuts and the moment is gone.#reality comes crashing back down- they're not going anywhere.#and i mean. idk if this is a common/universal experience but ive had many a late night where ive done exactly the same thing#fantasized about quitting my job/going back to school/finding some means of self employment/moving somewhere totally new#and ive had those fleeting moments where i could see it- i could see how i could make it work#or i could see that there's nothing *physically* stopping me from doing any of those things#and if i could just sum up enough courage i could do anything i wanted with my life#but then i wake up the next day and that vision is gone.#i cant see outside the glass house anymore- i can only see the reflection of the inside.#tl;dr i should revisit y5- the writers were cooking and i didnt take enough time to savor it#(esp not the shinada section bc i hated his combat style lol)
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10pm and on again, already. Challenging oneself by attempting to keep a textual flow in messages, ending paragraphs in a way that matches how they started. Trivial tasks turn somewhat difficult reaching a certain level of sleepiness. Maybe there's a hint to take from that. (Or maybe not, who knows. Watching the sky instead to refocus. Tales and stories of distant stars.)
#outerworld #later that day later that night #borders of sleep #city nights
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LUCERNA, Witch of the Eversun Sands
As one travels further inland from the pleasant western coast of the Sunbeam Ruins, one can experience the land growing arid and rugged until the vast desert dunes of the Eversun Sands stretch out towards the eastern horizon. Out here, only the well-prepared and crafty can endure the eternal sun and sparse resources. Lucerna often wanders these sands, gathering rare resources, guiding travelers through the dangerous territory and keeping an eye out for any aberrant creatures that may be encroaching from the Hewn City.
#central sunbeam ruins is a desert in my lore#there are day/night cycles along the borders and coasts#but inland there's only eternal day and sunlight#which creates an arid sun-scorched desert#:D#clanlore#flight rising#dragon share
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I want to strangle this DJ for playing Reckless Love at an 80s party (not 80s inspired or glam in general, whole ass actual 80s along with ZZ Top, Cinderella etc)
#like hell yeah great that you're playing reckless love but i hope you get stoned by the elders who were actually around in the 80s#and can name every obscure band whose tapes they own and will immediately call you out for mistaking a song for released in the early 90s#i'm not actually at the bar btw i just saw the posts on their stories but dude please this is basic knowledge in your field#whatever i'm currently hunting for concerts somewhere near me so i can avoid my ex workplace unless one of them explicitly invites me#i bought tickets for tailgunner in selb without even knowing how exactly i'll get there and back lmao but it's in september so still time#i planned to stay at a hotel for the night because the car ride is hell even during the day and i'll probably only get out after midnight#but they're all so expensive or another half an hour away or in fucking czechia which i don't wanna deal with in the middle of the night#because i'd cross the border and if there's Stuff and i just want to Sleep after a long night uhhh not this time#if i wouldn't leave my sister by herself and the guys weren't driving a completely different route to their next show the following day#i would probably ask them for a ride tbh lol at this point i have no shame when it comes to flirting with bands#since i was asked to hop in the touring van by a swedish band i had just met half an hour ago why shouldn't it work with them too?#anyway i'm in desperate need of gig announcements but just like last year my depression's gotta last a bit longer until march at least 💔#mel talks
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#godfuckingdammit#rant about gross skin condition things upcoming#yesterday was supposed to be the day i changed my bandages#but there was a water leak in the park so they had to shut the water off yesterday#since i need to soak my bandages off i couldn't do them#no biggie#i've pushed them a day before#makes me feel gross as hell but i can deal with it#well turns out they didn't get the leak fixed yesterday#so the water's off today too#leaving me feeling disgusting in these old bandages#but i figured the issue would be fixed sometime today#and i could get them done when that happened#oooof fucking course#they didn't get it fixed today either#so i have to go another night in these disgusting old bandages#tomorrow i'm going up to grandma's place to change them#which is really not going to be fun#but it's the best option i have#god i feel so fucking disgusting it's bordering on painful#i hope i don't get an infection from this
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woke up from a nightmare so bad I had to walk around the appartment to check if someone didn't get in. sometimes I'm scared that there will be Someone In My House for some reason and I am still stressed now despite checking
#i hope i can just fall asleep and feel better during the day ugh#i hate nightmares so much i know im gonna die of a cardiac arest at 30 bc of that... the added stress and pressure... so unnecessary#anyway. i need to unpack this bc it borders on paranoia some nights and I hate it
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✨️ Let people enjoy things in peace ✨️
#had a bad experience last night that opened up some childhood & teenhood memories#basically i showed someone a song and artist that I am really excited about and yes i am indeed talking about Cha Cha Cha#because i got so happy that he won and this song is so fun and i just associate it now with feeling happy and feeling good#and i like käärijä’s performance so much and i can’t wait to see him at eurovision#but#the response was a visible dislike for it that was bordering on disgust and after the song ended#all they said was that they think they are going to have nightmares#and it just reminded me of every single time that i have been made fun of or made to feel like an idiot#just for liking certain types of music or certain artists#it just makes me feel so awful#i’m never sharing my music with my family ever again especially when it means something to me because it just feels too upsetting#completely ruined my evening#and the day before had been such a perfect day where i felt good all day#vent#rant#music#mypost#my post
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why am I still awake????
#Oh yeah because I have a million things in my head#And this is the first night in like two weeks that I'm only mildly anxious about them#So my brain is just freely running down the path#Like a border collie allowed to finally go full tilt after days of being cooped up#And this here I am#Got significant work done on my 30 day challenge tho
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bedtime i surpose.. i loves you all mwhamwhamaha. ok bye
#now for my cursory talking in the tags for 30.minutes#sighhh. i wish i could just copy my little mini globe and put it likee. online.. i had a thang t umm. draw on a globe digitally b4.. but i#cant remember what it ws called sobsobsosbs...ill try n find it tmrw ig...#but umm saurrr yeha.#ig rly i dont have that much 2 talk abt......sry i thot id have more. teehee#i rly wanna try n likeee. do a worldbuilding project... but bc i think it will be good for me to go insane crazy abt something for a while#might crack open world anvil. but also its sooo sucks without a membership...#could always just make Oh so many google docs...#bc now ive got likee. th sort of layout of the planet... ive got pics of my Orb i need to get likeee. more.. all angles even#its judt hard bc like. i have t be super duper careful abt shere i hold it#LEST the devil.#could maybe likee. cut it super carefully??? n lay it flat 2 get a good pic... idk tho sobbing#but ermm. ya :]#now i wanna try n design their solar system...... idk how likee modern theyll be#th people. who live on this planet.. so idk if theyll even know anyfink abt their solr system#but still. itll be good for establishing like. day/night cycles + what the sky looks like.. ALSO i need to decide on like. how big the#planet is...#but hluld i go for that first Orrrr should i go for like.. political/cultural borders first... hrm hrm hrm much t think abt#i also need to decide on biomes/climate for each part of th workd.. smiles#ik if yr likee. writing. you arent suppsoed to worry abt this stuff too early#but i havent written since likee..2018-19 and im not abt to start... this is just mein special little project!!!!#thank gd my talkatice nature came back now im all tuckered out. which would be a SUPER rude thing 2 say if i ws hanging out with my friend#tucker. i dont have a friend named tucker but if i did that wouldbe been a shitty thing 2 say to him....#but ermm ya. if nybody wants to brainstorm random little worldbuilding stuff... smiles at u#my dream is to get SUPER deep into it... with conlangs and astuff .. but i also have a super duper short attention span with projects like#this. no matter how much i beatmyself up over it...#but its ok... gngngngn i love you all beautiful people in my phone :]
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