#Of faking being 'not like other guys' to IMPRESS WOMEN?

[stellaluna33]

The way the phrase "Pick-Me Girl" has set us back DECADES, I'm not even kidding... Like, REALLY? We're deciding that if a "girl" doesn't conform enough to what "normal girls" do or like, the explanation is that she's doing it (or faking it, even!) to impress GUYS??? Wow, ok.

[arabella-s-arts]

Scenes/Things in Supernatural that genuinely don't make sense to me if Dean was straight:

The confession booth scene.

Sam just rolling with the fact that Dean's siren is a guy while still thinking sirens infect people through sex.

Dean being flustered by several men: Gunner Lawless, Aaron, Doctor Sexy, etc.

All the parallels between Destiel and other couples. (A big one being "last night on Earth" bc how do you do that accidentally.)

Having all the gay jokes be on Dean instead of Sam.

Paralleling Sam meeting his childhood celebrity crush with Dean meeting Gunner Lawless.

The boner Dean got when Cas cleaned up.

Dean gulping after Cas does an impression from a Western movie.

Charlie, a lesbian, calling Castiel "dreamy."

The way Mary looks at Dean and Cas when they hug.

Dean wondering why everyone assumes he's gay, while Sam not caring.

The logic that Charlie can't flirt with guys because she's only attracted to women, but then having Dean flirt with the guy for her.

Dean seeming disappointed when learning that Aaron's flirting was fake.

The amount of time Dean and Cas spend staring at each other.

Dean canonically having an orgy with Crowley.

A woman saying that she knows when someone's pining for someone else to Dean, just for us to learn that Dean was never in love with Amara.

The set design and script choices that lead to a cross in the background while Dean said "I do." to Cas after he came back to life.

That time when Dean wanted to say something and Cas was like, "It's okay, I heard your prayer." But Dean still looked like he wanted to say something important.

Amara: [about Dean] "I can see inside your heart. Feel the love you feel. Except, it’s cloaked in shame.”

If you want to have a more expansive list, @destiel-is-real-idgaf added to this one quite nicely.

[james-bucky-barnackle]

I mean?

Synopsis: On a press tour with your co-star Sebastian Stan, the interviewer asks you a question about another film he did and the answer surprises him.

Pairing: Sebastian Stan x Actress!Y/N

Word Count: IDK I'm too sleep deprived to count.

A/N: Bro I am on a resurgence. Might just fuck around and continue writing more fanfics or whatever.

It’s another busy day promoting your new movie with Sebastian, The Road Trip. It's a funny romcom about two best friends going on a long trip to see another friend who your character is dating. Interestingly enough, the guy who plays him is Chris Evans. The interviews are currently being done in pairs, and you're with Sebastian.

You've always been candid, speaking your mind without feeling shy. Deep down, you're a bit of a pessimist, accepting things as they are. When you first heard from your agent that you were cast in The Road Trip alongside Sebastian Stan and Chris Evans, you laughed hysterically. The idea that you, an unconventional beauty, were chosen to be on screen with those two seemed surreal. You never really think about dating co-stars, which helps with acting in general. The media is impressed with how chill you are around A-list actors, and even though it hasn’t fully sunk in yet, the industry has started promoting you to that list.

The interview has been going on for about 15 minutes when another journalist joins, mostly asking about the experience of working with the cast.

“It’s my first romcom, can you believe it?” you say.

“First?!” Sebastian stares in mock disbelief.

“I know, right?!” You feign surprise.

The interviewer continues, “How does it feel to do something lighter and a bit comedic for once?”

“You mean, a movie where no one dies?” Sebastian covers his mouth at your response.

“I mean essentially,” the interviewer laughs. “Wait, no one dies?!” They nudge you playfully.

“I mean, I’m not sure, no spoilers,” you say, breaking the fourth wall and looking into the camera. Sebastian cackles. “It’s definitely refreshing. It feels like going to school for some reason. Like I don’t want to miss a class just because I might miss something wild happening.”

“What?” Sebastian glares. “What school did you go to?”

“I mean, aside from the learning stuff…” You grimace. “It’s fun, honestly. I’d love to do more romcoms. It’s very down-to-earth and just resonates with you so much. I don’t wanna get too cheesy, but I’m such a hopeless romantic—this is my jam.”

“Sebastian, how’s your experience working with Chris again, this time outside of the Marvel universe?”

“Wait, this isn’t in the Marvel Universe?!” you butt in. Sebastian again, fakes a loud gasp. You two laugh. This interview feels like it’s going nowhere.

“It’s totally fun, as Y/N mentioned—it really is like going to class. But most of my scenes are with Y/N, so she’s like the lab partner I’ve never had. Chris was always texting us, checking which location we’re going to be at, making sure we’re scheduled on the same day. It’s fun when we’re both on set.”

You nod in agreement. “Yeah, we’ve got a good rhythm going. It’s like having a little family on set. Plus, Chris is always the one who brings snacks, so that’s a bonus.”

Sebastian laughs. “Oh, absolutely. Chris and his endless supply of trail mix.”

The interviewer chuckles. “Sounds like you all have a great dynamic. Was there a favorite scene you both enjoyed filming together?”

You think for a moment. “I really loved the scene where we’re stuck in the car during that rainstorm. It was so chaotic, but we had a blast improvising and just playing off each other.”

Sebastian nods. “Yeah, that was a good one. The rain machine was going full blast, and we were just trying not to crack up the entire time.”

The interviewer smiles. “It sounds like it was a lot of fun. And the chemistry definitely shows on screen. Speaking of different roles, Y/N, Sebastian’s been in the movie Fresh where he plays a sociopathic killer who preys on lonely women pretending to be a genuine guy.”

“I don’t like where this is going,” you say, laughing, as Sebastian shakes his head.

“Would you, like Noa, fall prey to Steve’s antics?” This question gets a louder laugh from Sebastian as your face shows pure shock. You hold him back with your hand and say,

“I’ve thought about this, to be honest,” you start, looking at Sebastian as he raises his eyebrows, impressed.

“Oh, you have?”

You laugh and continue, patting his thigh and looking back at the interviewer. “Me and my friend talked about it a while back. And it’s frightening because I would’ve probably ended up on a chopping block.”

“Noooo!” Sebastian shouts, “I was rooting for you.”

“No! But, like, you are incredibly good-looking and charismatic. It would be hard not to give my number at the grocery aisle.”

He tilts his head at your response. “Surely not good enough to get yourself killed?!”

“You’d be surprised how far I’d even go,” you say, as the interviewer laughs with you both. “Oh god, I need to call my therapist,” you add, ending the topic with the three of you gagging.

“Might just have to talk to mine too, after hearing that.”

You can already feel TikTok saving this clip and turning it into a meme.

You notice, after you call Sebastian good-looking, he’s been eyeing you sideways and biting his lip. As if he’s suddenly gone bashful. You can’t help but feel a boost in your ego. Could it be that Stan is shy? You make it a point to tease him for the remainder of the interview.

“What’s something funny or unexpected that happened on set?”

“Oh, there were so many moments,” you start. “One time, we were filming this really serious scene, and out of nowhere, a bird flew into the set and landed right on Sebastian’s shoulder.”

Sebastian laughs. “Yeah, I had no idea what to do. I just froze, and then Y/N started making bird noises to try and get it to fly away.”

You laugh, nodding. “It took a good ten minutes to get back into character after that. Everyone was cracking up.”

The interviewer grins. “That sounds hilarious. It’s great to hear that you all had such a good time. Speaking of moments on set, were there any funny or awkward moments while filming the more romantic or intimate scenes?”

Sebastian raises an eyebrow, smirking. “Oh, plenty. Like the time we were shooting that kiss scene in the rain, and Y/N kept slipping on the wet pavement.”

You roll your eyes playfully. “Hey, it was slippery! You were the one who can’t stop laughing during takes.”

Sebastian laughs. “True, true. But come on, we both know it was because you were so nervous about kissing me.” You notice him biting back.

You gasp in mock offense. “Excuse me, I was not nervous! I was just...distracted by how ridiculously good-looking you are. It’s hard to concentrate when you have that face right in front of you.” He smiles uncontrollably again, feeling defeated by your nonchalance. He wonders, how are you so good at this?

The interviewer laughs, clearly enjoying the banter. “So, who do you think had the hardest time keeping a straight face during those scenes?”

You both point at each other simultaneously, then laugh.

Sebastian leans back, shaking his head. “Definitely Y/N. There was this one scene where we were supposed to be having this deep, romantic conversation, and she just couldn’t stop giggling.”

You nudge him playfully. “Well, you weren’t helping with all your ad-libs! You kept whispering things like, ‘Is that your stomach growling or are you just happy to see me?’”

Sebastian laughs. “Hey, I was trying to lighten the mood! And let’s not forget the scene where we had to stare into each other’s eyes for what felt like an eternity. I swear, Y/N, you blink more than anyone I know.”

You smirk. “Only because I was trying to avoid getting lost in those baby blues of yours.” At this point, Sebastian was laughing hard, but feeling nervous at your jokes. He secretly wished it were all real, his ears were red and hot. He’s already thinking of how to approach you after the interview and get himself out of the friend zone which he didn’t even thought he’d be in, having found a new interest in you. 

The interviewer looks between the two of you, amused. “It sounds like you both had a lot of fun with it. Do you think all that chemistry will translate to the screen?”

Sebastian nods. “Oh, definitely. I think our off-screen dynamic really helped make the on-screen relationship feel more genuine. Plus, Y/N here is an amazing actress. She made it easy.”

You smile, feeling a bit bashful. “Well, Sebastian’s not too bad himself. It’s hard not to enjoy working with someone who’s so talented and, let’s be honest, ridiculously attractive.” 

Here she goes again .Sebastian grins. “Right back at you. But let’s be real, we’re both just incredibly good-looking people trying to make a movie here.” The internet is gonna have a field day.

The interviewer laughs. “Sounds like a tough job! Any last funny or romantic moments you’d like to share?”

You think for a moment. “There was this one scene where we had to dance together. Neither of us are professional dancers, so there were a lot of missteps and toe-stepping. But it ended up being one of the sweetest scenes because it felt so real and unpolished.”

Sebastian nods. “Yeah, that was a great scene. It was supposed to be this perfectly choreographed dance, but it turned into us just goofing around and having fun. I think it really captured the essence of our characters' relationship.”

The interviewer smiles, clearly delighted by your stories. “Well, thank you both for sharing these wonderful moments. It’s been a pleasure talking with you.”

As you and Sebastian leave the interview room, you head towards the lobby where a few other cast members are mingling. The energy is still high from the fun and laughter of the interview. Sebastian nudges you playfully as you walk.

“Hey, remember in the interview when you called me incredibly good-looking and charismatic?” he teases, a mischievous glint in his eye.

You roll your eyes, grinning. “Oh, come on. Don’t let it go to your head, Stan.”

He chuckles. “Too late. I’m pretty sure I’m going to bring that up every chance I get now.”

“You would,” you laugh, shaking your head. “ It’s not like I was lying.”

Sebastian stops walking, turning to face you. “Well, thank you. And for the record, you’re pretty incredible yourself. Both on screen and off.”

You feel a warm blush creeping up your cheeks, putting a palm to your chest as if to continue the gag. “Thanks, Seb. That means a lot.”

He smiles, his eyes softening. “No, really, it’s been really great working with you. I think we make a pretty good team.”

“I think so too,” you agree, feeling a flutter in your stomach, you realize he’s actually serious now. There’s a moment of silence as you both just look at each other, the playful teasing from earlier now replaced with something more tender.

Sebastian breaks the silence first. “So, what do you say we celebrate wrapping up the promotion tour? Maybe dinner tonight?”

You raise an eyebrow, teasingly. “Is this your way of asking me out, Stan?”

He grins, a little sheepishly. “Maybe it is. What do you think?”

You pretend to think about it for a moment, then nod. “I think it sounds like a great idea.”

“Perfect,” he says, looking genuinely pleased. “I’ll pick you up at eight?”

“Eight it is."

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[cinnamorollcrybaby]

BEG!

Tags: Satoru x fem!Reader, nocurse!au, misogynistic!gojo, college!au, reader puts him in his place, CRACK do not take this fic seriously, enemies to lovers, suggestive, mdni

Synopsis: Satoru is a stupid alpha bro who’s misogynistic and a play boy in a fraternity at your college. He learns that he can’t walk all over you, and that turns him on.

An: Thank you to everyone who commented on that post and encouraged me to write this! I didn’t think you guys would eat it up like you did 😅 I thought this would be a smutty one-off, but I actually wanted to try and make it into something a little more meaningful; hence why it took a bit longer to post. This is only part one :)

The party. |

His house screamed wealth and overconsumption at every corner. Money was obviously frivolously spent with building and furnishing the Gojo fraternity house. It was sleek, modern, but still a devastating bachelor’s pad.

The Gojo fraternity held parties every day of the weekend, including Sunday. Women got in for free, and men had to pay 5 dollars to get in. Not that Satoru needed the money — he was disgustingly wealthy and a trust fund baby. He merely charged guys money that way no one below his standard could just waltz into his frat house.

Of course, he truly believed every other man in the frat house was below him in some way. He had the full package: smart, funny, rich, handsome, a dick that should be registered as a legal weapon.

It was no wonder that women was never an issue for him. He found flirting with them to be like child’s play. It’s just too fucking easy…. pun intended. He and Suguru once had a challenge to see who could pick up the most women in a single night. Satoru ended his night after fucking 9 women in a single night, and one of those events was actually a foursome between him and three girls at once.

Honestly, he could be so much worse. With a witty personality and a mouth that just won’t shut up, he could talk his way into or out of anything.

It’s a Sunday night, which usually isn’t a big turn out for the party at his house since everyone has class the next morning. Plus, all homework is due at 11:59pm on Sundays. But this turn out was just embarrassing, there was merely 10 people all sat in his living room.

Suguru already had a girl in his lap. Everyone was giggling about something. Satoru felt like he had a chip on his shoulder, he wasn’t the center of attention right now, so he had to fix that.

Plus, there was a pretty girl in the room who he wanted to impress.

Sitting down in front of you, Satoru grins and hands you a cup undoubtedly of liquor. “Here you go, sweetness. Have one more.” He encourages, knowing that it’d be easier to chat you up if you’re a little buzzed.

“Oh, thanks.” You smile politely, and you fake taking a drink out of it. You’ve heard the stories about Satoru, and there’s just no way in hell you’re drinking something he gives you.

“What are you all talking about?” Satoru asks with a casual grin, and he takes a sip of his own drink.

“Oh, just how dumb Andrew Tate is.” A nobody responds from within the group.

“What? He’s not dumb…” Satoru nearly pouts as his favorite starboy was being harshly criticized by his friends.

“Oh god, don’t tell me you like him.” You say with disgusted look on your face as you eye Satoru. Now, you’re definitely not drinking whatever he just gave you.

Satoru’s face twists in defense as you so boldly speak up about his interests. It’s clear to you that he’s offended, but he’s trying not to make a big deal out of it.

“Why? What do you think is so bad about him?” He retorts as he cocks an eyebrow, leaning back in his seat to try to appear as confident and collected as possible.

“How about how he treats women like shit?” You ask, raising your own eyebrow. Satoru has another thing coming if he thinks you’re just going to bow down and not argue with him because he’s rich.

“He doesn’t treat women like shit-? Where are you getting your facts from?” Satoru argues, and his jaw tightens a minuscule amount. It’s bad enough that he’s being challenged, but he’s being challenged by a woman.

“His literal interviews, and the video of him literally beating a woman?”

“That video was just a sex act without any context.” He dismisses, rolling his eyes and not dispelling any claims about the interviews.

“Bitch, is that what sex sounds like to you? Because you must not be doing it right if she sounds like that.”The room erupts into laughter, and Satoru’s face only makes it better. His pale skin is becoming a little flushed. His eyebrow is twitching slightly with anger.

He takes a breath before quickly recovering. He hasn’t forgotten his objective tonight is to sleep with you. His signature smile returns to his face, and he leans in slightly. “I don’t know. Why don’t you come teach me how to do it right?”

“As if. I’d rather grind my pussy against a cheese grater than fuck an Andrew Tate fan.” More laughter breaks out amongst the small group of people.

Satoru’s jaw drops as he looks at you with disbelief. You’d rather… grate your cunt than sleep with him? “Oh yeah? So, what kind of guy piques your interest then, princess? You probably like those woke emasculated guys. Suguru might be more up your alley.”

“Hey, what the fuck?” Suguru laughs, chunking an empty beer can at Satoru’s head. The girl in Suguru’s lap continues to mindlessly giggle and play with his hair.

“No, I like men who are calm and capable. Maybe a guy who can lead but also knows when to take the backseat.” You explain, eyes wandering over Satoru’s stature. “I like them funny and kind.”

“See? I’m just what you need, princess. I can do all those things and so much more.”

“Yeah? You’re going to take the backseat sometimes?” You challenge with a knowing smile on your face. You already know what type of guy Satoru is based off of this sole interaction — plus all of the horror stories of how he’s a modern-day Casanova.

“Princess, the only time you’ll need me to take a backseat is when you’re riding that pretty pussy against my face.” His cerulean eyes gleam against the LEDs in the room. He’s fully confident that will win you over.

Your face stays completely flat. You don’t even crack a small pity smile for him. “Oh sorry, was this meant to be the part where you’re funny?”

Satoru looks at you, and you see a small twitch in his eye. He’s never had someone match his wit or his sass before. You were the perfect challenge for him — his perfect match up.

He tips his red solo cup up until his finishes the rest of his drink. Fuck sleeping with you. He wants to make you beg for him to fuck you while he just laughs in disinterest. You’re his mission now.

“You’re cute, princess.” He finally comments before getting comfortable in his chair again. “You don’t have to act like you don’t want me. ‘s okay. No one here will blame you.”

Your arms cross over your chest, and your lips curl into a frown. As much as you want to pretend to be unbothered, your face can help but show the irritation you feel from him. He’s unwavering, thinking that he will just argue and flirt his way to winning you over.

He needs to be humbled real quick, and you’ve got nothing else better to do.

“Oh really? Thank god. I’ve been dying to get on my knees and suck the most mediocre dick of my life.”

“You have the wrong guy, sweetness. I’m anything but mediocre.” He retorts without missing a beat.

By this time, most of everyone has stopped paying attention to you two — used to Satoru’s antics by now. This is just another Sunday night for him — chasing pussy as per usual.

“Yeah? Any guy who constantly boasts about how good they are in bed usually isn’t good at all.” You respond with a small eye roll.

Satoru’s strong arms cross over his chest. He’s wearing a simple white shirt with some black pants. It’s overwhelming plain, but it compliments him so well since his appearance is striking enough as it is. “I never boasted, princess. I simply stated that I wasn’t mediocre.”

You let out a small scoff and shake your head. It was honestly arguing with a brick wall. “Semantics. Either way, I don’t want to fuck you.” You dump your liquor out into a potted plant that’s next to the couch.

Wondering why you even decided to come to this stupid party, you stand up, and Satoru follows suit. “Hey now, darling. Come on. Don’t leave now. The night’s still young.” He tries to smooth things over as he takes puts his hands up in surrender. “I promise I won’t call out the obvious sexual tension between us for the rest of the night.”

“I have more sexual tension with your fake houseplant that I dumped my liquor into.” You deadpan, gathering your things as you decide that a cozy night in would be better than this mess.

Walking outside the house after everyone wishes you goodbye, you let out an audible sigh as you hear the door open and shut once more behind you. You spin on your heel to find Satoru jogging up behind you.

“Did I ruin your mood that much?” He asks with a small smile, shoving his hands into his pockets as he falls in step beside you.

“Well, following me home is certainly not giving you any bonus points.” You retort, tugging your jacket a little bit closer to your body. “Besides, that’s not really my scene.”

Satoru glances over at you as the two of you walk. He finds himself hypnotized in the way your skin glows in the moonlight. He would be lying if he tried to convince himself that you weren’t pretty because you are. Gorgeous — in fact.

“Really?” His voice is a shade softer now that he doesn’t have everyone’s eyes on him. “You seemed like a natural in there.”

You shrug your shoulders, not offering up any more information about yourself to him. He’s just another misguided frat boy with no intentions to change who’s looking to hit.

Satoru hates silence almost as much as he hates not being the center of attention. He hates how you’re not giving in even the slightest for him

“We should go out to dinner together sometime. I think you’d be surprised on how well I can fit in to any scene.” He offers, not quite giving up on hope just yet. He’s determined to get you in his bed, genuinely deluding himself that it would be a favor to you and him.

“No thanks.” Your voice is blunt as you step toward the entrance of a girls’ dormitories. Satoru’s technically not allowed inside at this late of an hour, but he’d be amused to see who would try and stop him. His family is the top donor of the university. He practically owns this place.

He stands there baffled for a moment as you turn down his date invitation. Rejecting his sexual advances is one thing, but you won’t even give him the time of day.

“So, when can I see you?” He asks, eyebrows furrowed and lips curled into a small pout.

“You’ll unfortunately probably see me in class.” You respond, letting the door close behind you and checking to make sure it locked. Breathing a sigh of relief, you trudge your way up the steps to finally get away from that leech of a man.

Satoru stays at the door for a moment, contemplating following you inside — not for any nefarious reason. He just truly believes that you’d like him if you gave him the time of day. One of his many charming qualities is that he can talk anyone into enjoying his presence.

He had already made up his mind. You’re going to like him. You’re going to sleep with him too and like it, and he’s definitely not going to catch feelings for you so he can make you feel as embarrassed as he did tonight.

He’ll just have to set his plan in motion during class.

[xomakara]

Roomies With Benefits

(re-posting from my old account seulrinnie-rinrin/xomakara-secondary)

SUMMARY | You have no choice but to be roommates with San when there is a glitch in the leasing office’s system. The more time that you live together, the more that you both can’t help but want each other. PAIRING | San x Reader GENRE | non-idol!San, College AU, Roommate trope, fake dating trope, smut with some plot, protected sex (wrap it up everyone!), vaginal sex, oral sex, fingering RATING | Mature, 18+, NSFW, MDNI LENGTH | 7,380 words TAGLIST | -- NETWORKS | AUTHOR’S NOTE | I would not mind living with San (or any of the other members) if there was a glitch in the system. LOL. Hope you all enjoy, reblog, like, comment~ Love you all ❤️

ATEEZ Main Masterlist

"There has to be misunderstanding," You looked at the management team of your apartment complex. "There's no way that you could lease the unit to two people who signed two different leases at different times. Please tell me I'm not crazy."

"My system shows that both you and Mr Choi are on the lease..." The manager searched for something on his tablet. "I will double check with my secretary to confirm if everything is correct. We should have an answer by tomorrow afternoon. Until then, can you and Mr Choi share the unit?"

You shook your head. There was no way that you'd share the apartment with Choi San, the most popular guy on campus and your arch rival since freshman year. Okay, sure he was stupidly, insanely hot with a sexy brain to boot but he wasn't someone you would ever let into your personal space, much less share the same living space.

There was also the small fact that he was one of the most eligible bachelors at school and always getting girls all over him. He had dated many of them before they got tired of playing second fiddle to his social life or wanted to get closer to his family money. You had seen him flirting with women during lunch, talking to his other stupidly, insanely hot friends about how he couldn't wait to bang yet another girl later that night. Every time he turned around, some new girl was ogling at him and that infuriated you.

Not that you hadn't had your fair share of guys sliding into your DMs just because they were interested in you, trying to impress you with expensive gifts or showing up on campus with roses, candy and other 'cute' things just to see you smile and notice them. Sure you were the Queen Bee on campus, even with barely any effort on your part, but that didn't mean you needed everyone else telling you how pretty and desirable you were, did it?

No. You were perfectly fine being single, thank you very much.

But it seemed like this misunderstanding would force you to spend more time together. How terrible.

"Let's just share the apartment for one night." San spoke up, the manager giving him a small nod. "Tomorrow, we expect answers."

You walked out of the management office, a scowl on your face as you waited for the elevator. San was by your side, tapping his foot impatiently while keeping an eye on your reactions. You were tired and just didn't feel like arguing with him right now.

"Let's just get to the apartment and figure something out." San muttered next to you. "It's probably not a big deal."

You sighed. "If only it were that simple." You tried to find the quickest route to the apartment unit so you could get away from him.

The last thing you needed right now was to come across San and a lot of sexual tension going through the roof, only making you more irritable than you already were. You hated how badly you wanted him, hated yourself for reacting the way you did whenever he was near you. It was disgusting, embarrassing and it made you want to punch the wall.

Shit. This was bad. Really bad.

San noticed the look on your face. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing." You said as you approached the front door and opened it. You looked at the boxes that littered the living room area, both yours and his mingled together in a weird mixture of feminine and masculine decor.

He sighed and followed you inside. "Are you sure you're okay? Everything seems fine to me. What's the problem?"

"We need to share this apartment tonight." You stated matter-of-factly. "That means I'll be sleeping here with you. By tomorrow, the whole campus is going to talk about how the Queen Bee and Alpha Male hooked up. No way can that happen. My reputation is on the line."

"And what do you care about your reputation?" He asked, walking towards you. You backed up against the door, causing him to stop.

"You know I care about my image." You snapped back. "Besides, I've worked too hard to maintain my social status for me to lose it because of a mistake."

His eyes narrowed as he took in your features. His nostrils flared slightly, his gaze darkening with every passing second. You knew what he was doing and you wished you could say something, stop him from approaching you and taking you against the door like a predator chasing down its prey.

Your heartbeat accelerated and your body started to react in ways you never expected, long buried desires resurfacing once again, feelings stirring deep within your heart.

If he touched you right now, you wouldn't fight him. You'd let him take you and fuck you into oblivion until neither of you could walk. All you cared about was his lips on your neck, his hands running along your hips and thighs, your fingers entwined with his. You'd be content to go slow and explore your bodies for hours, waiting for the moment when he finally plunged into you, thrusting hard and fast until you couldn't take anymore.

Instead, you were stuck with San, who was staring at you with his hot brown eyes, and even though he didn't touch you, the longing in his stare burned hotter than the fire raging behind his irises. You were powerless to do anything but stand there, watching him silently and hoping that he would finally make his move.

But he didn't. He turned away and gestured to the door of the bedroom. "Take the room. I'll sleep on the couch tonight. Hopefully, tomorrow we can find out why there was a mix-up and we won't have to worry about this shit anymore."

"Are you sure you don't mind?" You asked hesitantly. He glanced at you, the corner of his mouth twitching slightly as he stared at you intently.

"Yeah, take it." San nodded. "Despite all the things you hear about me on campus, I don't go around sleeping with women without their consent. Even you, Queen Bee. I respect that. Just take the room."

"Thank you." You breathed softly, thankful for his generosity and maturity. With a slight sigh, you walked towards the bedroom and closed the door behind you. You locked it and crawled onto the bed, pulling the blanket over your body and laying there for a few seconds before turning off the lights.

You lay on the bed for a few minutes, wondering what had gotten into San. Why did he suddenly act so mature? And was it really possible that you weren't imagining things earlier? Did he actually desire you as well?

It felt like a heavy weight was lifted off your shoulders. Yes, maybe it was a mix-up and the leasing office really did mess up your contracts. Maybe, just maybe, everything would work out just fine.

With those thoughts filling your mind, you fell asleep quickly.

You woke up slowly, disoriented from the light pouring into the room. Your heart raced as your eyes adjusted to the sunlight. Slowly opening your eyes, you blinked several times, your eyes adjusting to the unfamiliar ceiling above you.

Getting up and unlocking the door to the bedroom to make your way to the kitchen, you looked at San's figure as he snoozed away on the couch. The covers were pulled up to his chin and his shirt was partially undone, exposing a sliver of chestnut skin.

For a moment, you just stood there and watched him sleep, the excitement from yesterday still lingering on your skin.

You started up the coffee machine, brewed a fresh pot and made your way to one of the boxes in the living one that had your clothes packed in. Careful to not wake San up, you closed the bathroom door behind you and locked it so that you could shower in peace.

After taking a quick shower, you dried yourself off and put on your clothes. You made your way back to the kitchen and poured yourself a cup of coffee, adding a spoonful of sugar to sweeten it a little. As you sipped on the delicious black liquid, you leaned against the counter and browsed on your phone. A minute passed before you heard the sound of footsteps on the wooden floor, followed by a yawn.

"Good morning." San said with a soft smile as you poured him a cup of coffee and slid it towards him.

"Morning." You replied. "After you get ready for the day, let's go down to the leasing office and see what they say."

"Sure." He said as he gulped down half his coffee, eyes trained on your form as you took another sip. You knew exactly what was going through his head and you didn't think he was going to be able to hide it from you anytime soon. The expression on his face was clear evidence that he liked what he saw.

About half an hour later, you and San both made your way to the leasing office. Walking past the crowds of students that congregated outside the main building, you arrived at the office and entered the queue. After a short wait, you finally reached the front desk and signed your name on the sign-in sheet.

"I'm sorry for the inconvenience." The manager apologized again as he looked at you and San. "Unfortunately, there was a glitch in the system and I'm afraid that our records show that we mistakenly assigned you the same unit."

"There's no other units that are available? Not even in a different location?" San inquired, a frown etched across his brow.

"There's nothing left." The manager shook his head. "All the other units have already been filled by other students that are no longer living in the dorms, sorority or frat houses."

"When is the next available unit?" You asked, putting on your best poker face. "How long will it take for us to get one?"

The manager paused for a moment, seemingly torn between wanting to tell you that there wasn't another unit available and being worried about offending you by saying so. "I'm so very sorry but there won't be any available units until the next school year. You may have to find someplace else to live if you cannot accept that."

"That won't be necessary." San interrupted. "I'm sure Miss Y/N and I will figure something out."

"That's good." The manager gave you a sympathetic smile before looking back at San. "Well, if you need anything at all, please let me know. If you need help finding a new place, I'm happy to assist."

San nodded and gave the man a polite smile before turning towards you. "We should go. Let's head back to the apartment."

You followed him back to the elevator, ignoring all the curious glances that the both of you attracted. Some people didn't know why you two were sharing an apartment, others were just trying to catch a glimpse of San and you, others were already forming their opinions and thoughts of the two hottest people on campus and if they were really dating. Either way, everyone wanted to know the answers to these questions.

By the time you got to the apartment unit, the sun had almost set and nightfall was upon you. Both of you dumped your bags inside the apartment and decided to sit down on the couch.

"So..." San said, breaking the silence. "I guess we're going to spend our last year of university in the same unit..."

You nodded. "Yep."

"Let's try to work something out. Why don't you continue to stay in the bedroom and I'll stay on the couch for the time being?"

"I can't let you sleep on the couch forever, San." You protested.

"Then just let me stay in the bedroom until we find another solution." He suggested. "Unless you don't want to share the bed with me either?"

"I-I'm fine with sharing." You stammered out, avoiding eye contact with him. There was a nervous twitch dancing on the end of your lips as you felt your cheeks grow warm with embarrassment.

"What are you thinking about, Y/N?" San asked, bringing your attention back to him. His eyes flickered from side to side, peeking at your lips before landing on your eyes.

"Oh...nothing." You mumbled, averting your gaze. "I can already hear the rumours..."

"Then why don't we just date?" San suggested. "At least to the public. No one will bat an eye if we said that we moved in together because after being a couple for a few months. But in private, we'll just be two roommates. Nothing more."

"Maybe...maybe we should do that." You murmured softly. Your cheeks grew redder and your voice was barely audible. You could feel your heart pounding loudly in your chest as your pulse raced in anticipation of what San would say next.

"I promise I won't touch you unless you ask me to." San said softly. "And I won't demand anything sexual from you."

You swallowed heavily, biting your lip as you met San's intense gaze. "You...you're sure?"

"Of course I am." He said firmly. "I don't want to pressure you into doing anything that you aren't comfortable with. So I'll leave it up to you."

Tilting your head to the side, you tried to decide how to respond. If this was truly the only option you had, then perhaps dating San would work out. “Okay, fine.” You sighed, giving in. “We’ll try it. But if I ever start feeling uncomfortable or I don’t want to date you anymore, you better not hold it against me.”

"Deal, now why don't we start unpacking?" San suggested, standing up and walking towards the bedroom. "This is going to be our home for the next year. Let's make it a nice home, okay?"

He was right. This would be your home for the next year and you should make the most of it. Putting aside your worries for the moment, you grabbed your bag and followed San into the bedroom. Once you had unpacked your stuff, you sat down on the edge of the bed while San sorted out the rest of his belongings. You both then moved to the living room and settled on opposite sides of the couch.

"I can already see the look on your friends' faces when we tell them that we're 'dating'. They probably think that we're crazy and that we're playing games. They'll see right through us." You remarked.

"Then should we practice on making it look real?" San asked. "Or is that asking too much?"

“I don’t think I have it in me.” You shrugged. “But if it makes you feel better…”

With a smile plastered across his face, San leaned forward and kissed you on the lips. It wasn’t overly romantic and it was brief, but it showed enough of his intentions to get you to agree to his plan. You hadn’t expected that kissing him would make you feel tingly inside, but your stomach fluttered as he pressed his lips to yours. You could taste the remnants of coffee on his tongue and you couldn’t help but pull him closer to you, deepening the kiss. Before you knew it, you found yourself pinned to the sofa by San, unable to move or resist his grip.

"Y/N..." San whispered hoarsely. "Do you want to stop this or...?"

"I...don't know..." You confessed, not wanting to lie. "We can keep kissing...but nothing else tonight."

He looked into your eyes, a brief smile gracing his beautiful lips. "Okay, I could deal with only kissing." He paused for a moment, letting you adjust to the idea. "Though...if you change your mind, just give me a sign and I'll stop immediately."

Relieved, you smiled softly at San before nodding slightly. "Yeah, I'll let you know."

"Okay, then I'm going to kiss you some more." San purred, leaning in once again. "If you tell me to stop, I will."

His lips descended slowly over yours, igniting your body with passion. He tasted like coffee and mint toothpaste and he smelled amazing. His hands explored your waistline, slipping under the material of your shirt. All you wanted was to feel San’s skin against yours. To feel every inch of his muscular frame pressed against you. To inhale the scent of his cologne and bask in the warmth radiating off his body. With those thoughts in mind, you leaned forward and ran your fingers through his hair, pulling him tighter against you.

Your kisses became deeper, your breathing erratic as you moaned louder than you intended. Your hips arched upwards, pressing against San's crotch. A small groan escaped his throat as you began kissing him harder, your breath hot and ragged against his ear.

You weren't aware that your fingernails dug into his scalp as you felt him push against you, trying to make you moan louder. "Y/N..." San moaned as you bit down on his earlobe, sending chills down your spine. "We should stop...while we can."

You lifted your head, panting heavily as you gazed at San. "Yeah, yeah we should stop." You agreed, trying to steady your heartbeat.

Damn, living with San was going to be interesting.

That night you laid in bed under the covers as you turned your head to watch San snoozed next to you on top of the covers. You stared at his sleeping form for several minutes before realizing that you were staring at him. You smiled softly as you layed back down, curling up beside him. After a few moments, San opened his eyes and gazed at you.

"Are you awake?" He asked quietly.

"Mmhmm, yes I am." You responded softly. "Hard to sleep with someone lying next to you isn't it?"

San rolled onto his side and propped himself up on his elbow. "It certainly can be." He murmured. "But I've been doing it for so long that I just kind of accepted it."

"I guess I haven't gotten used to having someone next to me yet." You commented with a small chuckle.

"The Queen Bee is not used to having someone next to her?" San teased. "How strange."

Shaking your head, you smiled. "No, not at all. I know I get plenty of male attention being the Queen Bee on campus but I just turn everyone down. I guess it's because I prefer spending my time alone. Besides, the guys who are attracted to me are creeps anyway."

"I'm attracted to you." San chuckled. "Does that make me a creep?"

"There's no way you're attracted to me, Choi San." You replied, shaking your head again. "I'm not exactly your type."

"Who says you're not my type?" He countered. "All the other girls that try to get into my pants? You don't think I notice you?"

You sighed, rolling your eyes at San's persistence. He was determined to prove his point, despite the fact that you still disagreed with him. "Look, I'm flattered that you think I'm attractive but-"

"No, Y/N." San interrupted. "Just hear me out. You're beautiful, smart and funny. Plus, you don't put up with any crap from anyone. Do you know how rare that is?"

For the first time since San spoke, you stopped to think about his words. "Am I really that special?" You asked.

"You're pretty damn special, actually." San admitted. "I don't know why you don't think you're attractive if half the student body and myself fall at your feet."

Laughing lightly, you shook your head. "I think I'd rather spend my time alone than get wrapped up in relationships." You decided. "Besides, I'm not interested in hook ups."

"You didn't say that when we kissed earlier." San pointed out.

"I-it was different!" You protested. "A kiss doesn't mean I want to have sex with you!"

San smirked. "Why did you kiss me then? Just to test the waters?"

Blushing bright red, you ducked your head low as San reached out and gently stroked your cheek. "Not necessarily..." You muttered, glancing away.

"Don't be embarrassed by what happened earlier." San said, placing a finger underneath your chin and lifting your head. "I liked kissing you and I know you like kissing me too. If you don't want to do anything else tonight, then that's fine with me. But you need to at least admit that there's something between us."

Your heart pounded loudly in your ears as you fought back the desire to lean forward and kiss him. "So what do you suggest we do instead?" You asked.

"Well..." San trailed off. "There is one thing I've always wanted to do with you."

"Oh?" You asked.

"Mmhm." San nodded. "I was hoping that maybe you'd let me kiss you again."

A grin tugged at the corner of your mouth as you watched San's face light up. "I'm not opposed to another kiss." You admitted. "But..."

"But?" San prompted.

"I was thinking..." You trailed off, trying to find the right words. "Maybe we could just go slow and enjoy each other's company."

San regarded you for a moment before nodding. "Alright, I can do that." He said. "Tonight's the first night we live together so it'll be the perfect opportunity for us to get to know each other. We can take things easy and see where they lead us."

You placed a hand on San's cheek, tracing his soft features with your thumb. "I like the sound of that." You told him. "Now you can kiss me."

For the remainder of the night, you were lost in his kisses.

It had been several weeks since you and San started living together as roommates. In the comfort of your own home, the both of you led your private lives away from the prying eyes of others. Nowadays, the both of you would talk for hours on end about your day or complain about the latest episode of your favourite drama. You never thought that being able to converse with someone was such a relief, especially after a stressful week at work or class.

When the both of you were out in public together, you both played your parts as a couple convincingly. You'd hold hands with San, kiss him, blush when his hand slid lower than where it needed to be and even grab onto his arm whenever the conversation turned serious. Even San's friends were convinced that the both of you were dating and no one batted an eye when you came out of the bathroom in the middle of the party to hug San, accidentally brushing your breast against his arm or when he would wrap an arm around your waist to pull you close to him and kiss your forehead.

Friends would ask about your sex life but you clearly didn't have one. At least not yet. You were content spending the night in bed telling each other stories or just cuddling while watching television. Exchanging kisses every now and then but making sure to limit yourselves to making out and no further. It wasn't that you didn't want to have sex with San, it was just that you weren't ready for a relationship at this point in your life. Not to mention that you didn't want to rush into anything. If you took your time getting to know San better, it would make everything less awkward when the time finally came.

And then San's friend Wooyoung wanted to throw a small get-together at the apartment.

"Why does everyone want to throw a party here?" You complained as you walked into the kitchen. "Can't anyone take care of their own parties?"

"Scared that everyone will find out?" San teased you.

"How will they find out when our apartment has both of our stuff scattered everywhere?" You mumbled. "Our apartment literally looks like a couple. If anyone steps into the bedroom, I will murder someone."

San chuckled as he stood beside you, handing you a cup of tea. "I know you'd rather be curled up on the couch with a book but let's try to keep appearances up tonight. Okay?"

You sighed, taking the offered cup. "Fine."

Wooyoung had invited all of his friends and a few girls from the campus. Although you didn't want to mingle with the others, you did it for San's sake. But as the night progressed, you became increasingly bored. Most of the guys in attendance were there to ogle over the attractive women but San stuck close to you the entire time. The girls, on the other hand, kept flirting and vying for San's attention but he refused them all politely.

He only had eyes for you.

Sighing, you excused yourself from the room to use the restroom. After finishing your business, you left the restroon and tried looking for a seat but noticed that they were all taken. Everyone was drinking, eating, and conversing with each other. When San saw you standing there, he gestured you over to him, only to pull you into his lap.

"San!" You whispered, his hands resting on your hips.

"Shh...it's time to play house." San murmured huskily into your ear. "Need to keep up the charade."

You blushed deeply, glancing around at the amused stares of his friends. For the sake of San, you accepted his invitation to stay seated on his lap. At first, it seemed innocent enough, but soon you could feel San running a hand up and down your back, his soft fingers caressing your bare thigh. The tips of his fingers slowly inched higher until they brushed against the bottom of your skirt.

"San..." You whispered again, surprised by his sudden boldness.

"Can I kiss you, Y/N?" He breathed into your ear. "Please? I really want to kiss you right now."

Your breath hitched in your throat, knowing full well what he meant. Not that you were opposed to kissing San, you enjoyed the feel of his lips pressed against yours whenever you got the chance. But he'd never made a move on you like this before in public. Sure, you'd gotten hugs and a quick peck on the cheek from him for appearances sake but none of those kisses made your heart race like this.

"What do you think?" San whispered, pulling back from your ear long enough to meet your gaze.

"In front of everyone?" You questioned quietly.

"Baby, we need to give them a show so they can get up and leave the apartment." He reasoned. "Besides, I've been thinking about kissing you this whole day. And you looked so sexy today, dressed in that short skirt and that tight, sexy top. So yes, in front of everyone is exactly where I want to be kissing you."

With a soft sigh, you reluctantly nodded. "Alright, let's give them something to watch."

Slowly, San pulled you closer, placing his free hand on the nape of your neck, gently holding your head still. Then, with his mouth just inches away from yours, San whispered, "Kiss me, Y/N."

You closed your eyes and lowered your head, offering your lips to San without hesitation. In return, San captured your lips in a gentle kiss that melted your insides and made you gasp. Your mouths remained connected, devouring each other with lustful desire. There was no hesitation, no inhibitions; it was purely a display of raw lust and intense passion.

The way he held you, tenderly caressing your back, sending goosebumps all over your body and the pressure of his lips against yours sent shivers down your spine. All you wanted to do was to run your fingers through his messy, black hair and slip your arms around his neck, begging him to touch you wherever he pleased.

As if reading your mind, San broke the kiss, grinning as he rested his forehead against yours. "Well, are you satisfied?"

Hearing San speak like that caused your cheeks to burn red. "You could say that." You replied, a little breathless.

"Good." San grinned, lightly running his fingers down your side.

You heard a cough and you both looked up to see Wooyoung staring at the two of you with a smug grin on his face. "Sooooo, is this the cue for us to end the party and go home so that ya'll can fuck each other senseless? Because that's what I'm hearing."

San chuckled lightly as he rose to his feet, pulling you along with him. "Yep, I guess that is what we're doing. Time to shut the party down. Y/N is feeling tired."

"Tired, my ass." Wooyoung sneered, eyeing the two of you with amusement. "You guys are just horny. Look how the two of you can't keep your hands off of each other."

"Once you get a taste of pussy, you can't get enough of it." San commented and you couldn't help but bury your head in his shoulder out of sheer embarrassment. You looked up at San and he grinned down at you.

"Alright, folks. Party is over." You announced. "Go home so that I can have my boyfriend all to myself. Bye!"

You smiled brightly as you waved goodbye to everyone. Soon, the apartment was empty except for the two of you and it felt nice to finally be alone with San again. As soon as you sat on the couch, San's hands grabbed onto your thighs and pulled you closer to him.

"You don't have to pretend anymore, baby." San whispered in your ear, making your heart flutter uncontrollably. "All of these people aren't here to judge you. We can enjoy ourselves in our own little world."

He stroked your leg softly, trailing his fingers down the edge of your skirt.

"It feels good to not have to act like we have a charade going on." You murmured, smiling up at San.

"Why don't we make this charade real then?" San gave you a mischievous smile, unbuttoning your tight shirt and letting it fall to the floor. "Why don't we live in reality instead of this fantasy that we're putting on for everyone else?"

"San...what are you-"

But before you could finish your sentence, San reached up and cupped your face with his hands, giving you a deep, passionate kiss that left you breathless. Once he released your lips, you stared up at him with wide eyes. "Baby, I don't want to just kiss anymore. It's so hard for me to control myself around you. I want to throw you over the couch, tear your clothes off and fuck you until neither of us can move anymore."

"I know you want it too, Y/N. It shows in the way you look at me sometimes." San admitted, leaning down to give you another gentle kiss. "When you kiss me sometimes. When you wear these sexy clothes and don't think I'm not paying attention to you. I pay attention, I pay so much attention that I want to rip your clothes off and fuck you until you're screaming my name. I want you, baby. More than I ever thought possible. I want to lose myself in you. Take you any which way I please. Make you scream my name so loud that everyone within earshot knows who you belong to."

Fuck, you wanted this man. So bad that you ached in places that you never knew existed. Your body hummed with pleasure as you moaned against San's lips. "And why hold it in?" You whimpered, raising your hand to trace the outline of San's jawline.

"Because you're a queen that deserves to be treated like one." San growled, slowly slipping his tongue into your open mouth. "And if my queen wanted to wait and take things slow, then I would respect her wishes. I would wait until she wants me inside of her, filling her with the sweet warmth of my love."

You gasped as his warm tongue slid over yours. His kiss was different from the ones you shared in the past. Now, it wasn't as if you two were strangers; there was an unspoken connection between you two that grew deeper with every passing second. "And now?"

"I want you, Y/N. I want you more than anything in this world." San rasped. "Tonight, I want you in ways that I haven't even imagined before. You've made me realize that there are a lot of things I've never experienced in life, and now that I have you, I plan on experiencing everything."

Your heart swelled in your chest as you gazed at San with longing. You leaned forward, pressing your lips against San's once again, wanting nothing more than to be in his embrace forever.

This. Was. It.

"I want you too." You mumbled against his lips. "Every part of you, San."

A single hand ran through your hair, tugging gently while the other caressed your cheekbone. Your hands grasped the sides of his shirt, gently pulling it upward until it fell to the floor with a thud.

"Oh God, baby." San moaned as you kissed your way down his neck, leaving a trail of fire-like kisses along his collar bone. When you finally stopped teasing him, you placed your palms against his muscular stomach and ran them downward until you reached the waistband of his jeans. Slowly, you unzipped his pants, revealing his hard length for the very first time.

"San...you're so beautiful." You breathed, caressing his shaft with trembling fingers. "I've always loved the way you smell, but seeing you with your pants undone, sporting a cock so big and thick in front of me has made me a complete mess."

He groaned as you took his dick into your hand, admiring the thickness and length of it. It was perfectly shaped and there was a huge vein pulsating down its center, stretching out towards the tip of his erection. His dick was so perfect, so breathtaking, that you had a difficult time keeping yourself from taking him into your mouth and sucking on it.

Instead, you cupped his balls in one hand and began massaging them with the other, causing him to groan even louder.

"Are you trying to drive me crazy?" He asked in between pants.

"Is it working?" You teased.

"Yes..." He muttered through clenched teeth. "More, baby. Please, give me more."

His words fueled your already raging desire for him. You squeezed his balls harder, eliciting a low moan from him. You dropped to your knees and started to pull his underwear down until they pooled at his ankles. San threw his head back, moaning louder as your mouth descended upon his cock, tasting the salty essence of pre-cum as you engulfed the entirety of him in your mouth.

"You're such a good girl." San moaned, running his hands through your hair as you pleasured him. "So eager to please. So eager to swallow my cum, just like you swallowed all of me. That's it, Y/N. Suck it like you mean it. Suck it like you fucking love it."

Breathing heavily, you licked the head of his dick, humming as you continued to suck on him. The taste of him was intoxicating, addicting, almost like drinking your favorite cocktail. Each time you slid your mouth further down, taking him deeper into your throat, you felt yourself getting lost in his intoxicating scent.

Soon, you found yourself drooling over the sight of his dick sliding between your lips. And as you looked up at him with hooded eyes, you noticed the way he looked at you. Like you were his entire universe. Like you were meant to be his.

"Please..." San whispered, his voice barely above a whisper. "Take it all."

You hummed against him, continuing to stroke him in a circular motion with your hand as you kept up with your ministrations with your mouth. You could feel him getting close to climax, so you slowed down, taking his dick out of your mouth. "Cum for me, San. Coat my throat with your cum."

You wanted him to cum so badly. You wanted him to fill your mouth with his semen so that you could drink it down greedily. "Let it flow, San. Let it all flow down my throat."

A few seconds later, you heard San release a strangled gasp. A second after that, he flooded your mouth with his cum, shooting stream after stream down your throat.

It didn't matter if you weren't prepared for it. All that mattered was that San came, and that he did it because of you.

As he pumped out the last of his semen into your mouth, you felt the vibrations in his dick as he became still. A moment later, you took the head of his dick into your mouth, sucking the remaining cum off of him. Then, you raised your head and looked up at San, panting slightly as he tried to catch his breath.

"Did I do good?" You asked, tilting your head to the side as you watched him carefully.

"You blew me away, baby." San chuckled, reaching out to touch your cheek. "And now I really want to fuck you."

"Mmm, okay." You nodded. "That sounds like a great idea."

With a wicked grin, San wrapped his arms around your waist and picked you up off the ground, carrying you over to the bedroom. Once he laid you down on the bed, he climbed atop you, kissing your forehead, his hands pulling off the last of your clothes. After that, his lips followed their path southward, lingering against your skin as his mouth moved down to tease your breasts.

Once his lips latched onto your nipples, he began sucking gently on them, occasionally releasing them to circle around them with his tongue. At the same time, his fingers began circling around your core, his thumb dipping between your folds and pushing into you with soft, tender strokes.

"Ahh..." You cried out as your entire body began to tingle. "S-San!"

"Tell me what you want, Y/N." San murmured against your breast. "Tell me how you want me to fuck you."

Gathering all of your courage, you pulled his face upwards and locked eyes with him. "Do whatever you want with me, San. Do whatever you need to do to get you off. Fuck me however you want. But please...fuck me hard."

At the sound of your begging, San laughed softly and said, "Well, when you put it that way...you make it very difficult to refuse."

Grabbing a condom out of the nightstand drawer, he ripped it open with his teeth, using his other hand to roll it down his throbbing member. Soon enough, he positioned himself between your legs and settled himself on top of you, sinking into your wet heat with one thrust.

It was the best feeling you'd ever experienced. Being completely filled by this man. This man who you desperately wanted to claim as your own.

San grabbed your wrists, pinning them over your head as he started to pump his hips, slowly. "God, you feel amazing." He grunted. "You're so tight around me. So hot. So fucking hot. I can't believe that I'm finally here, buried deep inside of you. Your pussy is tighter than I could have ever dreamed of. How is that even possible?"

"Fuck, San..." You panted, rocking your hips underneath him. "Keep going."

"Okay." San replied, smiling as he pushed into you harder. "You want it harder? Okay, I'll give it to you."

One of San's hands went to your hip, gripping you tightly as he slammed into you. His other hand gripped your hair, bringing your face closer to his as he bit down on your shoulder. "Fuck, baby." He whispered. "Your tits look amazing bouncing in the air."

"Does it feel good, Y/N?" He whispered, pushing into you even harder. "Tell me what you like. Tell me what you want me to do."

"Ahhh..." You cried out. "I like this, San. Just keep doing this. Keep doing exactly what you're doing."

His lips left your shoulder and traveled to your ear where he nibbled lightly on your lobe. "I love the way you say my name." He murmured, brushing his nose across your cheek. "It's so sexy. So, so fucking sexy."

He then trailed kisses down your neck, pausing to kiss and suck your collar bone as he continued to plunge into you. Before long, he was running his lips back up to your ear, whispering against it. "Y/N, are you ready for me to take you to heaven and back? Because I am. I am right now. As soon as you let go, I'll take you to paradise and fuck you until we both pass out from exhaustion."

"Oh god, San..." You whimpered, tightening your thighs around him. "Take me there. Take me to paradise. Don't stop fucking me. Never stop fucking me. Don't you dare stop fucking me."

"Never." He agreed, running his hand over your ass as he increased his pace, slamming into you over and over again. "I don't ever plan on stopping."

"Yes, yes, yes!" You screamed, burying your head into the pillow beneath you as San increased his speed yet again. You dug your nails into the mattress as you panted loudly, attempting to regain your breath. "San, oh god, San!"

"Cum for me, baby." He panted against your ear. "Can you cum for me?"

"Yes!" You cried out, arching your back and grabbing hold of the sheets, wrapping your fingers around them. "I'm coming! Oh god, I'm coming!"

A few seconds later, San's entire body stiffened and his dick began pulsating inside of you. For a brief moment, his cock twitched as he held onto you for dear life before the orgasm hit him and washed over him. He fell forward onto your chest, gasping for breath as you clung to him. When he caught his breath, he pulled out of you, sitting upright on the bed next to you and pulled the condom off of his dick. With a small smile, he tossed it onto the floor, then collapsed beside you, spooning you from behind.

After several minutes, you finally recovered from your near death experience and opened your eyes. You smiled softly as you saw San lying naked next to you.

"Hey." He murmured, brushing his fingertips along your arm. "You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." You assured him, snuggling into him.

"I didn't hurt you, did I?" San asked, stroking your arm with his thumb.

"No, you didn't hurt me." You giggled. "Actually, it felt pretty damn amazing."

"I'm glad." San sighed. "And to think that we've been living together all this time and haven't done this. We definitely need to remedy that situation."

You couldn't help but laugh as you pressed a kiss to his lips. "And how do you propose we do that?"

"Anytime, anywhere." San grinned. "I don't care. As long as it involves you and me and lots of sex."

"Oh, we can definitely work with that." You giggled. "Speaking of which...I'm kind of curious about something."

"What's that?" San asked, running his hand up and down your thigh.

"Now that this whole thing has happened...are we still playing pretend or...?"

"We're not pretending anymore, Y/N." San interrupted you. "From now on, you're mine and I'm yours."

You swallowed nervously. "Yours?"

"I'm saying that we're together, baby." San explained, pulling you in close. "For real this time. No more games. No more pretending."

You smiled softly, resting your head against San's chest. "That makes me really happy, San."

"Now that that's settled," he murmured against your neck, "how about we get this night started again? Because I know I can't wait any longer to fuck you again."

"San!" You let out a laugh as you squirmed in his arms. "Don't you dare."

"...Too late." San smirked as he slid into you. "I told you that I wouldn't stop until I fucked you again. And I meant every word."

And he certainly wasn't kidding.

[daydreamgoddess14]

What's it take to get your number?

What's it take to bring you home?

Here she is! My first Bucky fic (😬)

From my Valentine's Lovebomb event, this one is for Emily 💜

Bucky Barnes x F!Reader insert, no use of y/n, no applicable warnings - just some cute fluff while I dip my toe into another fandom.

Masterlist

Of all of the things Yelena had talked you into, this was undoubtedly the worst.

And she had, of course, talked you into some truly awful shit.

If she could see you now, scowling into your margherita, she’d probably throw something at you.

Hey! Smile a little, huh?

As it happens, the thought of it does make you smile.

She's been good to you since you met. Being Valentina's PA was often an utterly thankless existence. The way she'd collected up Yelena, Alexei, John Walker and the others had been admirable.

Adding Bucky Barnes into the mix had been a goddamn coup.

They mostly went about their business as instructed and paid you little to no attention, but Yelena had spotted you still working away late into the night just before Christmas. She'd disappeared and returned twenty minutes later with cartons of Cantonese food which she insisted you shared.

Since then, a tentative friendship had blossomed between you both.

At the bar, there’s plenty of small talk going on in the background. Lots of organising.

The tables have been arranged loosely in a grid with plenty of space between them to move around.

Not that you have to move anywhere.

The instructions have been made very clear.

Yelena read them out with such glee, you suggested that she go instead.

So you sit, and you wait… then they ring a bell and the men come in and also sit down, yes? Hmm… says you have five minutes. Seems not long enough? Then bell goes again and you stay in your seat. The men move around and you have more handsome men to talk to! Fun, right?

Oh yes. Great fun. So much fun.

Next time Yelena suggests speed dating, you’re going to drag her kicking and screaming with you.

You steal a glance at the time, only a few minutes until the shitshow kicks off.

You signal the waiter for another drink, god knows you need it.

A couple of deep, cleansing breaths and the bell goes.

The noise and activity around you does distract you.

You glance around quickly at the couple of people around you, the beautiful women in their barely there dresses, poker straight hair and lashes so long they could be used as a fan.

You’ve made an effort, of course.

A certain blonde pain in your ass made sure of it.

This top, this skirt, these shoes.

She threw them at you.

Girl, the skirt has pockets!

The woman at the table next to you looks completely underwhelmed by her first five minute attendee.

Her eyes wide and her mouth in a fixed line.

The poor guy loosens his tie nervously.

A tie? Yikes.

He seems uncomfortable, clearly aware of the unfavorable impression he's making.

You’re almost transfixed by the car crash about to unfold in front of you.

This has got to be more entertaining than your date, right?

This is the shit you could watch all night long.

A low cough alerts you to your own car crash.

You steel yourself, a fake smile already in place.

“Hey,” he says.

The smile begins to slip.

You know that voice.

Why do you know that voice?

How do you know that voice?

By the time you actually look at him, the smile is long gone.

“Oh fuck.” It could be a whisper. It could be a squeak.

Either way, it’s barely audible so of course he heard it.

“Fancy seeing you here,” he grins, slightly incredulously.

“What are you doing here, Bucky?”

“Same as you, apparently.”

“Did you follow me?”

“Why the hell would I follow you?”

“That’s what I’m trying to figure out. Did Yelena put you up to this? I’m going to fucking kill -”

“She didn’t put me up to anything,” he held up his hands in surrender. “And, I’d like to see you try,” he adds disparagingly.

He’s not wrong.

“So, why are you here?”

“Sam thought it would be a good idea. He says I’m too introspective.”

“Nice. He’s such a good friend,” you bite back.

“Right? He’s got enough charm for both of us.”

“So you don’t want to be here either?”

“Does it look like it?” He frowned.

“Fine. So we sit in silence until you can move on.” You tell him sternly, reaching for your drink and taking a long gulp. You signal the waiter again for another.

He scoffed and shook his head.

“I’m not sitting in silence. Sam says I should talk more, so let's talk,” he declares, and you just roll your eyes at his stubbornness.

“What the hell is there to even talk about?” you ask, “you literally have no idea who I am?”

Bucky seems undeterred by your attitude.

“What kind of books do you like?” he asks casually. “What kind of… seriously?” You eye him suspiciously.

“Yeah, you’ve always got your head in a book. You say I don't know who you are but I've seen you. Recommending stuff to Yelena - not to me, though - so what do you like to read?” He leaned forward on the table, making it wobble.

“Anything,” you mutter with a sigh, “everything, really. The classics, fantasy, thrillers, romance.” He nods along as you speak. “What about you?” You ask hesitantly.

“I’ve been reading the classics lately, actually,” he admits.

“Oh sure,” you roll your eyes.

“Hey, it’s true. I just finished Pride and Prejudice.”

“And did you enjoy it?” As you ask your question, the bell rings out.

“Gentlemen, time to move on to the next table please,” the organiser calls out.

“Hold that thought, doll. Guess I’ll see you around?” He stood, waiting patiently for the man in the tie to move along.

The woman at the neighboring table suddenly seems thrilled with her new date. Bucky offers her a smile, and she responds with a giggle.

He takes his seat at the next table, but instead of engaging with his new date, he leans back over to you.

“I loved it. I like the chemistry between Elizabeth and Darcy and the layers of their relationship. It’s probably my favourite romance.”

The woman next to you looks a little put out.

“Your favourite romance? Which others have you read?” You can’t help but ask.

The man directly across from you is growing increasingly annoyed, watching the conversation unfold with a sense of irritation, like he's watching a tense tennis match.

“I liked it more than Jane Eyre, and Wuthering Heights.”

A small, surprised smile curves up the corner of your mouth as Bucky continues to ignore his next date.

“Uhh, excuse me?” she interjected, her voice laced with irritation.

“Sorry ma’am, I’ll just be a minute.” Bucky calmly replies, not breaking eye contact with you.

“I’m not a fan of Wuthering Heights either, I tried to be in my tortured youth.” You admit.

He laughs and it’s… magical.

“Any others you’d recommend?”

“North and South -”

“Gaskell?” He confirms, you nod. He mirrors your nod, a small smirk crossing his face.

“Yeah, another brooding gentleman and headstrong woman.”

“Huh, sounds familiar.”

“It does, doesn’t it?”

Meanwhile, your new date grows increasingly impatient, tapping on the table incessantly, while Bucky's date becomes frantic as she attempts to catch the organiser's attention.

The man at your own table finally interjects, addressing Bucky directly.

“Excuse me, buddy, you're supposed to move on after five minutes, you know?”

“Sorry man, just seeing where this goes,” he shrugs before looking back at you. “Got any newer recommendations? Feels like I’m… stuck in the past sometimes,” he grins lopsidedly.

“Romance, or something else?”

“Let’s stick with romance,” he leans in with his elbows on his knees.

“Try Emily Henry,” you tell him as your new drink arrives.

“Excuse me sir, you do need to move on?” The waiter insists as he carefully places your drink down.

Bucky sighs, turning back in his seat to face his actual date.

“Finally, I might be able to grab a quick minute before the bell goes -” your date starts with a smile.

“Emily Henry, huh? Book Lovers author? I saw it but didn’t pick it up,” Bucky leans over again.

“I’ve got a copy, I’ll bring it over.”

“That’s great, thanks.”

“And North and South, too?” You ask.

“I look forward to it.”

“Excuse me!” Your date interjects loudly.

You look down at the table with a blush as Bucky turns away again.

“So, how long have you been single?” You hear your date ask as the bell goes again.

“And move on again please, gentlemen.” The organiser smiles.

Your date does so, following Bucky with an angry frown.

With another table between you, you assume that’s your additional ‘date’ with Bucky over and turn to greet your next date.

Now, from three tables away, Bucky calls down the row to you.

“Hey, doll, there’s a new bookstore opened by Sam’s place. We should check it out?”

You nod to placate him while disgruntled voices around you mutter and curse his interruptions.

The bell rings again and everyone moves on once more.

From five tables away he asks about the recipe for the pasta dish you made for lunch with Yelena last week.

From seven tables away he shouts to ask whether you saw the last episode of Traitors.

“That is enough, sir. I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to leave,” the organiser says with exasperation at the next bell.

“But we're getting along so well,” he protests as two waiters try to lead him to the door.

Giving up, he gives you a half shrug and a wave.

“See ya later, kid.”

He leaves without further disruption.

You turn back to your latest date but your enthusiasm has left the building with Bucky.

Despite the tedious hour that follows, no conversation manages to match the level of engagement you experienced in your initial encounter.

You had been under the distinct impression that he had no idea who you were. Of all of them, Yelena was the only one who made an effort. Alexei occasionally pulled you into conversation, usually when he needed an additional body on his side in an argument, but Bucky walked past your desk almost daily without a word or a glance.

You couldn't help but wonder why he chose tonight, of all evenings, to engage with you.

He could have ignored Sam's suggestion to attend. He could have ignored you completely.

You'd given him an out, offered to sit in silence.

His casual comment to your second date echoed in your mind: “Sorry man, just seeing where this goes.”

Those simple words had hinted at a deeper curiosity or interest, beyond just passing time at a speed dating event.

It had been both impressive and frustrating to see the usually stoic Bucky calling across tables, asking you questions about your job, how long you'd worked for Valentina, with an animated excitement that seemed to be reserved solely for you.

The organiser called time and you wrapped your coat tightly around you, the mid-February nights were cold and you were ready for bed.

You shot Yelena a brief text, letting her know you had arrived home safe and sound, choosing to leave her hanging when it came to details about the event.

After a fitful night, you arrived at the office the following morning, books safely nestled in your bag.

Yelena is parked at your desk, her feet casually propped up as if she'd taken permanent residency.

She raised an inquiring eyebrow.

“So, did you find the love of your life?”

“I'm never doing that again,” you warn with a pointed finger in her direction.

“Really?” A familiar voice behind you asks. “And here I thought you had a good time.”

You turn around to see Bucky standing there, his gaze fixed on you with a cheeky smile.

Yelena can barely contain her excitement, her grin widening even further.

Her feet hit the floor with a thud as she eagerly joins the conversation, eyes darting between the two of you. She turns first to Bucky.

“Wait, you were there?” Her question laced with disbelief.

Bucky shrugged nonchalantly, as if it were the most natural thing in the world for him to have attended a speed dating event.

“Yeah, and?” He asked, his indifference only increasing Yelena's excitement.

“You went speed dating?” She asks incredulously. He doesn't look at her as he answers, he looks only at you.

“I went speed dating.” He confirms.

“And all you got were book recommendations?” You add, reaching into your bag to hand him the two books.

“Well I was kinda hoping I got a little more than that,” Bucky smirks, his expression filled with a hint of mischief.

Yelena's eyes widened, her gaze darting back and forth between you and Bucky.

“Wait, what's this? What's with you two?”

“I mean, I did think you were scared of me-” he began.

“You don't scare me,” you cut in firmly.

His smile widened further.

“Good to know.”

Yelena watches the exchange with wide eyes.

“This is so weird,” she mumbles to herself.

“So, you think you'll do it again?" You ask him brazenly.

Bucky grins at your bold question.

“Maybe,” he muses before adding with a twinkle in his eye, “but only if you're there.”

FIN

[winchester-24]

Imagine you being possessed, and Dean doesn’t realize it at first

It seemed like these days, there were demons everywhere. Most of the cases you and the boys went on were demons. This case was the same. It was two towns over from the bunker, so you three were going to crash and dash their little chaos party they have going on. Sam estimated five altogether, so while being outnumbered, you three hoped the element of surprise would be on your side.

While in the backseat, you were reading a new book that Dean had picked up for you not too long ago. While you were focused on your book, Dean was focused on you. He admired how your face would change when something happened in the book, how you looked cute when you were concentrating, and how, most of the time, you had a little grin that he thought was the most adorable thing in the world. His eyes fought between concentrating on the road and concentrating on you. He never expected to fall for you, but slowly, the three of you working together over the years, you found a way into his heart. You were his best friend, and you knew almost everything about him. You accepted him, flaws and all. While he wanted to pursue more and be the one to call you his, he didn’t want to mess up what the two of you already shared. So, he would wear his best friend's title with honor and ignore the feeling he got when another guy would come around. He would pretend like he wasn’t happy when they left as well.

You, on the other hand, have loved Dean Winchester since you first met. The way his green eyes looked over you, concerned and impressed when they first met you. The first time he called you sweetheart, and over the years, the pet name princess he settled for would make your heart skip a beat every time. He would grab your hand in sticky situations to keep you close and make your face turn red at the worst time, and how he tended to you so carefully after each hunt. You have loved this man for years, but he never made a move, so you wore your best friend’s title with pride and tried not to compare yourself to the women he would pick up at the bar or try to feel that glimmer of hope when he does something that doesn’t seem entirely platonic.

The three of you came to the back of the house where the demons stayed. From the window, it looked like most of them were downstairs. Dean made the plan that he and Sammy would take the downstairs with most of them, and you would head upstairs to gank any others. When you and Dean nodded, Sam kicked the door down, and the three of you rushed in.

Upstairs, you have cleared most of the rooms. You can still hear the two boys downstairs fighting, so you are trying to be quick. You open one bedroom door and step in at first, not seeing anything, and then you get hit from behind. Two men grab you, and a woman steps forward from the dark corner of the room with black eyes. There is way more than what Sammy had initially thought.

“Hmm, you seemed to have ruined my little party.” The demon faked pouted. You looked up at her with hate in your eyes.

“Go to hell.” You replied. She bent down to your level.

“Baby, I’ve been there and don’t plan on returning.” She stood back up, and one of the men looked like they were about to hit you in the head.

“Stop!” She said suddenly. The man stopped. “I think I have a better idea.” Black smoke came out of the woman and headed directly to you. Panic struck you as the smoke entered you and down your throat. You now regret not going to get an anti-possession tattoo with the boys. She was now inside your body, and you were screaming and fighting to get out. The men let you go. She turned to them.

“Get out of here unless you want the Winchesters to kill you for touching their little trophy girl. I’ll catch up to you another time.” The men nodded, and then black smoke exited the two bodies, making them drop to the floor. The demon went and stabbed each body with your demon knife, making it look like you killed them. You are screaming the entire time to stop. She looks at you in the mirror.

“Hmm, we need a little more convincing.” She takes a different knife and cuts one of your arms, your cheek, and then cuts from your eyebrow up. She makes the one starting at your eyebrow a little deeper, and she or you hiss in pain. That cut will probably need stitches.

“Princess!” You hear Dean yell as feet are pounding up the stairs. The demon smirks in your body.

“Show time, Y/N.” She snickers and then changes her face to one of fake exhaustion.

“Dean! I’m here!” You yell. You turn and run towards the door and meet Dean at the entranceway. He immediately grabs your face and looks at the gash on your head, worry clouding in his eyes. His eyes dart behind you, and see the three bodies on the floor.

“You had to take on three of them?” He said, worry and guilt laced in his question. You nod your head.

“I’m so sorry, princess; I should have come up here with you.”

“I’m okay; I took care of it.” You speak. Sam looks behind you.

“I’m sorry, Y/N; I should have known there were more.” You turn to Sam.

“It’s okay, Sammy.” You say. You look back at Dean.

“Can we go home?” You ask, the demon trying to do your little puppy face that you learned from Sam. He nods.

“Yeah, we will go home and patch you up.” The three of you start to leave. Meanwhile, you’re screaming from inside your head, trying desperately to take control just for a few seconds. 

Back at the bunker, Dean patches your cut on your face up, careful with the stitches, eyes only leaving his work temporarily to look at you. You sit there, the demon doing her best not to give off any signs that you aren’t you.

“All done, " he says. His eyes lock onto yours, and you try to scream to him that you are not him. You take his face in your hand, and he closes his eyes and leans into it.

“Thank you, Dean.” You say softly. He looks at you.

“I should have gone with you.”

“It’s okay; I’m a big girl; I took care of them.”

“Yeah, but you got hurt.”

“You patched me up; I feel as good as new.” You smile at him. He smiles and leans over, and kisses your forehead.

“I’m glad, princess; I’m going to take a shower.” You nod your head and watch him leave. As soon as he is gone, you roll your eyes and scoff.

“You two are disgusting.” The demon says in disgust to you. You are cussing her out seven ways from Sunday, but she laughs.

“Your little Dean is so smitten with you; he has no idea something is wrong with you; he is just glad his precious little Y/N is okay.” The demon makes you giggle and then gets up. She catches sight of you in the mirror and turns her eyes black.

“This is going to be so fun.”

A week. You have been trapped in your body for a week, and neither of the boys have noticed. You have stopped fighting. It's heartbreaking that the boys can’t pick up on the fact that you haven’t been in your reading corner for a week while they do research, you haven’t cooked in a week, you haven’t gone into Dean’s room in the middle of the night, or you haven’t joined Sam in for a workout. The demon has made you more flirty with Dean, which makes you sick as it’s not you, but more that Dean is giving into it and flirting back. While you would love to be on the receiving end of the flirting, it’s not you.

Without your or the demon's knowledge. The boys have noticed a change in you. They talk about it quietly while you’re not around and share glances when you do something you wouldn’t normally do or say in front of them. At first, they thought you were shaken up from having to fight three-on-one at the house, so they let you cope, but now they suspect something else is happening with you. Dean’s heart clenches whenever you make a flirty comment to you, wishing he could believe it was you saying these things to you, but that isn’t like you to be so bold in coming onto someone. He plays along to make what he thinks is a demon in you not suspicious, but also, he can briefly believe you return his sentiment.

You just came back from the bunker, talking to the two demons who were at the house. They are planning their next move, and the demon has big plans for your body and getting the Winchester brothers. Dean is sitting in his usual spot across the library, and Sam is walking in from the bedrooms.

“Hey, princess,” Dean says, looking up at you coming down the stairs.

“Hey, handsome, miss me?” You say, smiling, flirting with him. You make your way across the library.

“Always beautiful.” He flirts back with you. You go to step to him when you can’t move. You look confused.

“What?” You say. You look around, and Dean gets up and moves the corner of the rug to show part of a devil’s trap. This grabs your attention inside your mind. The demon inside you makes your face twist into anger.

“What gave me away?” You sneer at Dean.

“Few things.” Dean cocks back at you with an attitude, hate showing in his face. While you know it's not directed at you; it still hurts you a little to see him looking at your body like that.

“Firstly,” Sam starts, “Y/N always joins me in the morning for a little bit of a workout, even if it’s just fifteen minutes to get her body going for the day. She also always goes to that little corner while Dean and I are researching; she never joins in as that is the quietest time in the bunker to get a few chapters in her book done.” Sam points to the corner when your reading nook is set up that hasn’t been touched in a week.

“Next, Y/N always cooks meals while we are here; it’s something that makes her feel like she is helping since she doesn’t research, even if it is just something small and easy.” Dean continues. “She also always comes into my room in the middle of the night. She hasn’t been in her room for a whole week in a long time. Also, Y/N is never as flirty as you have been. She has never been that direct with any man, let alone her best friend. She would never say those things to me.” Dean snarks at you, jaw clenched, eyes hard.

You laugh. “Oh, Dean,” You start. You are yelling inside your mind for the demon to shut up. “Poor little Y/N was fighting for a good while to try to get to you, but she gave up.” You say darkly. “She couldn’t bear the thought that you and little Sammy couldn’t tell it wasn’t her and making her stay trapped inside her own body, so she gave up fighting. Her little heartbreaking that you two were so comfortable with me around.” Dean faltered slightly, but his eyes got hard again; Sam stood beside him, glaring at you.

“You should hear some of the things Y/N thinks about her best friend, Dean. This girl is head over heels in love with you, and it was making her so sad that you liked me better than her; flirting with me, holding me, she just wished it was her. Y/N doesn’t think you could ever love someone like her, as she is not who you usually go for, but we know better, little Dean. You are so in love with her; you couldn’t even tell the first night you brought her back; you were just so thrilled that she was being a little more handsy with you.”

“You bitch.” Dean sneers at you. Sam and Dean grab you and tie you up to a chair. Once you are tied, Dean leans over you, getting very close to you or the demon.

“You’re going to get out of her and go back to hell where you belong,” Dean says darkly. You smile.

“Careful, Dean, you’ll turn her on being so close.” Dean goes to slap you but has to stop himself, reminding himself that you are still in there and he doesn’t want to hurt you.

“Oh, you were going to hit me? Kinky Dean.” You reply seductively, trying to get a rise out of him.

“Fuck you.” He spits as Sam finds the book with the exorcism in it. Sam starts reading it, and your body starts to twitch. You look at Dean glaring.

“You know she wanted to die all week? She kept thinking about how she would rather die than have me in her body any longer. She would beg you to notice and do something, but you never did.”

“Shut up!” Dean yelled at you as Sam continued reading. The demon was gripping to stay onto you, but you could tell she was losing. You were able to take control.

“Ugh, get out of my body! Sammy, hurry up!” You yelled as your body was jerking around.

“Princess, fight it!” Dean said, getting close to you and grabbing your arms. You look at him with tears in your eyes. Then your head leans back, and the black smoke comes spilling out of your mouth before disappearing to hell, where the demon belongs. You close your eyes, breathing heavily, and little tears come down your face as the boys untie you. Dean helps you up and guides you to the couch while Sam grabs you some water. You roll your head to the side and peek your eyes open to see Dean already looking at you.

“I know that face; it’s not your fault.” You say before he has a chance to let a word out.

“I should have noticed sooner, " he responds, his hands rubbing against yours. Sam brings you the water, and you take a sip.

“I’m so sorry, Y/N,” Sam says. You look at Sam.

“It’s not your fault, Sammy.” You say. “I’m just glad the bitch is out of me.” Sam looks at you worried.

“Was it telling the truth, Y/N? Did you want to die?” Sam asks quietly. You sigh and look at him, trying to decide how to handle the situation.

“I wanted to,” you said softly. Being able to watch what you're doing but not able to control it is the most exhausting and frustrating thing. I did things that I couldn’t stop myself from doing, and I will have to live with them for the rest of my life.” You look between the two brothers.

“But you two saved me and got me out; that’s all I can be grateful for.” You give them a small smile, and Dean looks at Sam with a pointed look. Sam gets the hint and excuses himself. Dean looks back at you.

“Was the demon lying about the other things too?” He asks quietly after a few moments of silence. Your breath hitched in your throat. You looked at him, and his eyes scanned your face, trying to figure out what you would say before you said it.

“No, it was the truth.” You finally say your heart is beating fast while looking at the other brother. Dean wastes no time leaning over and crashing his lips onto yours. He grabs your face in his hands while you drop the water bottle Sam gave you and guides your hands to his hair. You two pull away after a few moments, foreheads touching, eyes closed.

“I’ve loved you for a very long time, Dean. I never wanted to mess our friendship up, so I didn’t know how to tell you.” You whisper to him. Your eyes open to his green ones, and a smile plays at his lips.

“I love you, Princess, and I’m going to spend the rest of my life making up for lost time.” You smile as he pulls you into another kiss. Maybe that demon was helpful for something, but you will never admit that to anyone else.

[the-oblivious-writer]

After the Storm |1|

Tara Carpenter x Spider-Women!Reader

Chapter One: Mutant Lizards & Kisses

(idk how many chapters I'll do for this series but I'm just winging it for now)

Summary: After your fight with The Lizard, you climb back with quite a few injuries. Luckily, Tara's there to tend to them

Warning(s): Swearing, Police!Sam 🤭, mentions of fighting & injuries

Notes: Based off of this scene in TASM (gotta be one of my favorite scenes). Wrote this while taking a break from writing chp 6 of LTLI. Motivation for this kinda just came to me and I've always wanted to do a spider!reader thing

Masterlist|Next Part

You limped, nearly collapsing on the roof as you held your side.Your trap for Dr. Connors did not work out how you planned, and your recklessness to get more photos than you needed ended you up with none.

You painfully crawled down, making your way to the fire escape outside the window you recognized. You knocked on it three times with your head, ignoring your pounding headache. You kept your head resting on the window as you heard clicking from the other side. Tara looked over to you and smiled before saying, “Come in,” then turning back to the assignment she was working on.

You push the window up, sliding through the opening as you exhale tiredly. 

“You should maybe, uh, consider coming in through the main entrance,” Tara jokes and you huff a laugh. 

You struggle to lift yourself until finally hopping into her room

“Also, my sister is under the impression that you require psychiatric attention….” Tara finally turns to you when she hears you grunt and her eyes slightly widen.

“Y/N.” She stood up from her chair and rushed over to you. You’re now leaning against the wall, when Tara comes up to you. 

“What the hell happened?” She asked quickly.

“You should see the other guy,” you say in a husky voice; you can still see Tara fretting over your injuries.

She carefully walks you to her bed, gently laying you down, not wanting to cause you any further pain. You tilt your head back as you continue to speak through deep breaths, “the other guy, in this instance being a giant mutant lizard.”

“You’re all bruised up–”

“Tara, I’m fi–”

“You’re not fine,” Tara interrupted in a sharp tone.

“Tara–”

You both stopped your movement when you heard Sam’s voice from the other side of the door.

“Hey, Tara, I have to run to the station. Do you want me to pick up some ice cream from that place you like, on the way back?” You and Tara shared a look before she got up and you rolled to the floor. 

Tara opened the door just a few inches to greet her older sister. “No, Sam. I do not want ice cream. I can’t afford any distractions right now. I have a bunch of exams to prepare for,” Tara said, trying to fake an aggravated tone.

“Okay, I just remember somebody saying last week that her fantasy was to live in an ice cream house,” Sam reminded Tara. 

“Well that's impractical,” she said, shutting the door. “And fattening,” she added after opening the door, now shutting it again.

She turned around to see you peeking from behind the bed, giving her a dopey smile. “An ice cream house?” You questioned, still wearing the same expression.

Tara rolled her eyes, nodding, still not saying a word before turning back around to open the door once again. 

“Sorry…” Tara apologized to Sam. 

“It’s really good ice cream.”

“It’s just I can’t, um, I'm doing this um—paper and I’m really focused on it. Didn’t mean to snap at you.”

“It’s okay, I get it. How about I bring you a some for later?” 

“Okay, sounds good. Thanks Sammy,” Tara said with a smile before shutting the door one more time.

As soon as she walked back in the room, she gave you no room to talk. Already giving you directions to follow as she got her medkit from her nightstand’s bottom drawer. 

“Roll down your suit.”

You sigh but comply. “I’m fine, just a little banged up. I almost got him though—Dr. Connors. I can feel it, Tar. I’m gonna get him next time.”

“I swear, Y/N, if you get yourself killed I will make sure you regret it,” the younger Carpenter threatened.

“Why? Gonna miss me?” You teased, looking at the other girl as her attention was on the rubbing alcohol she was preparing. 

“In your dreams, Y/L/N,” Tara replied, but you saw the tiny smile she gave you before looking back at what she was doing. 

“Ah…” You softly groaned, feeling the sting as the rubbing alcohol made contact with your open wound.

Tara gave you an apologetic look, “It’ll be done soon.” 

“And when that's done?”

“What do you mean?” Tara asked with a slightly raised eyebrow.

“After this, how about we do something?”

She lightly shook her head with a smile before replying. “And Sam comes home to an empty apartment? Yeah, no.”

“I’ll get you home in time before Sam is,” you reassure her. 

“You’re forgetting Sam’s a police captain,” Tara’s body betrays her as she melts into your touch, feeling your hand gently sneak up her arm.

“Unless she can track my web-shooters, I think we’re good.”

 “I don’t know…” she looks down, averting her attention to one of your other cuts she’s tending too.

You left hand lifts her head, her chin resting on your knuckles.

“Come on…” 

Your foreheads meet and the towel in her hand is long forgotten. You brush your thumb against her bottom lip, you both slightly lean in until your lips are only centimeters apart. 

“Easy bug girl…” You heard her whisper.

“What’d you just call me?” You asked as you both lightly laugh, faces never pulling from each other. 

“Let's get out of here,” you said as you comedically shook your head around, causing Tara to giggle. “Just for a minute, come on.”

Your noses rubbed together as Tara leaned into you. 

“No..”

“Yeah..”

“Noo..”

“Yes.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“Noooo…” She hated how much she wanted to say yes to you.

“Yesss,” your smile never falters through this yes and no battle. You looked at how Tara looked away for a moment before looking back at you with a smile she was visibly fighting and in that moment you knew you won.

“...I better be home before Sam is.” 

—

When you land back on Tara’s fire escape, she’s clinging onto you for dear life while her face's buried in your chest. You smile down at her as you tell her, “We’re back by the way,” resisting the urge to place a kiss on her head.

“Yeah—yeah I knew that,” she replied, slowly pulling away from you.

You can’t help but chuckle at her shooken state. “Oh, you think this is funny? We were so high up—a drop that high is deadly, Y/N.”

“You think I’d drop ya?” 

“No, cause’ then Sam would bury you alive.”

“Speaking of Sam,” you’re both fully in the room now as you look at her bedroom door and then back at Tara, “Looks like she’s not here…”

“Y/N…”

“Tara…”

“I already let you swing me around while a billion feet in the air; you’re still needy for my attention?” She teased, slightly tilting her head.

“What, you don’t wanna hang out with me?” You teased back.

You’re now directly in front of her, Tara’s legs hit the back of the bed and you can feel her breath on yours. Your hands end up on her hips and her left hand lightly cups your jaw.

In a husky voice you begin, “Tara, you have no idea–" 

Suddenly the front door can be heard opening, the various locks twisting and turning. You and Tara looked at each other before Tara shoved you under the bed. Footsteps came closer and closer until Sam opened the door to find her sister sitting at her desk, headphones in, and pen in hand.

Tara turned to look at the door, pulling out her headphones when she made eye contact with Sam. “Oh, hey Sam. I was just finishing up this paper,” Tara said innocently, giving the paper a single tap with her pen.

Sam slightly nodded, looking around—Tara noticed this. “Did you need something?” Tara asked the older Carpenter.

“Uh, no—no, I just thought I heard something. Anyways,” Sam slightly shook her head, “got you that ice cream. It’s in the freezer when you want it.”

“Thanks, Sam. Love you,” Tara responded. “Love you too,” Sam said back with a smile before leaving the room but not without taking one more scan of the room.

You waited another minute before crawling out from under her bed. 

“That was a close one, bug girl.”

“Is that gonna be a permanent nickname?”

“You bet it is, bug girl."

You playfully rolled your eyes, a smile grazing your face when you see her dimples show. "You're lucky you're cute," you tell her.

"Oh? Would you rather me call you my savior?" Tara jokingly batted her eyelashes at you.

You bit lip in thought. "It's got a ring to it..."

"Yeah, no. 'Think I'm sticking with bug girl for now."

"Worth a shot," you shrugged before walking over to her,"Now...where were we?"

"You were leaving–"

"Mmm, no. That' not what I recall."

Before Tara could respond, you began placing kisses that travled to her jaw then neck, making her knees grow weak as you slowly lead her to the bed until her back softly hit the mattress.

You hovered above her while she gratefully accepted your touch, holding onto your biceps while you continued to kiss her.

"Y/N, my sister's right outside. And if you've forgotten; she has a warrant out for your 'wall crawling vigilante ass'—her words, not mine," Tara said, breath hitching as you continued to kiss her neck.

You stopped mid kiss, looking around the room then slightly frowned, furrowing your eyebrows as you looked back at her. "Is she here in the room with us...? Cause I don't see her."

"Y/N..."

"Tara..."

Tara let out a light sigh, raising one of her hands to cup your jaw. "Five. Minutes." She told you, holding your jaw with a gentle yet firm grip.

"Yes ma'am."

-----------

A/N: R because she didn't pack extra web fluid like Tara told her to:

[archangeldyke-all]

Ciao amore, just finished writing down an idea for fake hating with sevika. Not fake dating- fake hating. Sevika and reader being all like enemies in public, but then behind closed doors 🤭🤭

Would love to see you do something with this as well bc I know your take is just gonna be 😚🤌🏽 chefs kiss good fr

I LOVE THIS I LOVE THIS I LOVE THIS

men and minors dni

'the last drop' and 'the eye of zaun' have been in a feud for years.

one is owned by vander, one is owned by silco. they've been trying to put each other out of business since their bitter divorce five years ago. the two bars sit across the street from one another, and the owners live in the apartments on top, their four children swapping homes every week.

a lot of locals take the feud really seriously-- there are frequent brawls in the middle of the street when patrons cross paths. vander's customers are all 'old farts', and silco's are all 'trendy punks,' so there's always some kind of issue that's got both bars up in arms and upset.

you try not to get involved. you just keep your head down, wipe down tables, and collect tips.

if you'd known that the man interviewing you was in some kind of lifelong psycho-sexual feud with his ex-husband, you wouldn't have taken the fucking job-- but here you are.

the door to the last drop slams open and you jump, turning around to watch vander storm into the bar. "i'm gonna fuckin' kill him!" he shouts.

at the bar where she's eating maraschino cherries by the handful, jinx scoffs. "you say that every day, pops."

"you tell your father that if he ever tries to steal my fucking cocktail napkins again i'll strangle him." vander huffs. then he turns, and points at you. "rookie." he grunts.

you roll your eyes. "yeah?"

"go across the street and steal all their toilet paper. jinx, go with her."

"i got homework, pops!" jinx groans, desperate for any reason to get out of her dads' constant scheming.

"fine, go alone. take it all!" he demands.

you just shrug and prop your broom up, happy to have a reason to take a break. you'll take a roll or two, but leave enough for the customers to wipe their asses. you're not a monster.

sneaking into the eye of the city is easy, thieram gives just as many fucks about the feud as you do-- which is none. you grab a trashbag from the janitor's closet, then head into the womens' room, ready to begin your thievery.

you get about three rolls in your trash bag before the door swings open, and sevika bursts into laughter.

"what're you doing?" she asks.

you smile from where you're breaking into the next toilet paper dispenser. "you guys stole our napkins? so we're taking your toilet paper. don't worry, i left the stash in the janitor's closet there for you." you say.

sevika snorts and flicks the bolt on the women's room, helping you off the ground and pulling her in your arms. "hey, baby." she greets.

you smile and kiss her lips. "hi, sev." you whisper.

"it's gonna be a long fucking night for us. it's their anniversary." she says.

you groan, burying your head against your girlfriend's shoulder.

you didn't mean to fall in love with your should-be nemisis, what with sevika being silco's bartender and you being vander's. but-- neither of you have any personal stakes in the beef, and your attraction was impossible to deny, and one night as the two of you were trying to impress your respective bosses by shit talking one another, you ended up charming each other, making one another laugh at the insults you threw either way-- and by the time your bosses were leaving to pick the kids up from their after school activities, you and sevika were exchanging numbers.

and now, you're in love, and you're trying your very best not to let anyone know.

"it's surprising that the kids are all so well-adjusted given how stupid their dads are." you mumble. sevika laughs.

"you crashing at mine after work tonight or should i go to yours?"

"depends on what you want for dinner. yours is closer to that chinese place, but we could get italian if we go to mine."

"ooh, fuck, pasta sounds so fucking good. let's go to yours." sevika says. you smile and kiss her lips.

"sounds like a date, baby." you giggle.

just as you're about to leave her arms and head to the men's room to complete your stealth mission, the handle starts to rattle.

"who is it?" sevika calls, panicked.

"i gotta pee!" jinx calls through the door.

"it's not your week here!" sevika screams. she looks at you with a wild expression, both of you trying to figure out an alibi to explain toe jinx why you're locked in a bathroom together.

"pops ran outta cherries so i came here for more. lemme in!" she squeals.

sevika huffs, shrugs helplessly, kisses your cheek, then throws you over her shoulder. you yelp, and start struggling in her grasp.

she throws the door open and glares down at jinx. "i caught this rat spying on the last drop! stealing all our toilet paper!" she growls, jostling you on her shoulder. you muffle your giggles with your hand.

"lemme go you asshole!" you whine, wiggling in her arms, pinching her ass a bit. she jumps, and you bite back your grin.

"ugh, i don't care!" jinx whines. "get outta my way, i gotta go!" she shoves sevika to the side, then runs into the bathroom.

sevika sets you back down in the center of the bar.

"quick thinking." you giggle. sevika's still blushing from the pinch you'd gotten in on her ass, and you kiss her pink cheek. "see you later, baby." you whisper just as silco pushes into the bar.

you jump away from sevika, sprinting out of the bar like you're making a great getaway, and she chases after you, screaming to silco about your horrible theft.

vander berates you for only managing to steal three rolls, but you smile for the rest of the night.

taglist!

@fyeahnix @lavendersgirl @half-of-a-gay @thesevi0lentdelights @sexysapphicshopowner

@shimtarofstupidity @chuucanchuucan @badbye666 @femme-historian @lia-winther

@ellsss @sevikaspillowprincess @emiliabby @sevikasbeloved @hellorai

@glass-apothecary @macaroni676 @artinvain @realgreeniebeanie @k3n-dyll

@sevsdollette @ellieslob @xayn-xd @keikuahh @maneskinwh0re

@raphaellearp

[raviosrupees]

My parent rates LU Link's based on first impressions

[warning foul language, mention of alcohol, and my parents very negative impression of Wars !!! note this is my parents impression based off of the LU concept sketches + descriptions. a lot of em aren't accurate]

TIME

Very God of War, Kratos. PTSD Link.

when all the others are hanging out he's in the cups. He fought the moon? Sounds about right. Everyone else is talking and goofing off and he's got the thousand yard stare.

No one talks about how he cant get a full nights sleep. Please let him nap. Maybe let the owl take a nap too.

*stares at him for a very long time, before taking a sip of mimosa*

TWILIGHT

blond hiccup [httyd] very viking. Humble? Hiccup. Animal whisperer? Does he have a dragon? he turns in to a wolf? good for hiccup. getting over a complicated relationship? ...... h-

OH HE HAS GOATS? I love goats! Love this guy.

WARRIORS

Ah, douchy paladin! Yeah he's got the hip flex, he knows he's the shit. Very prideful? Of course you are. Leader type? Women problems? Not surprised. [said they most wanted to punch this one]

"This one writes himself. On Reddit forums"

FOUR [their 3rd fav]

"eeny meeny hippy genie" They've got the weird flowy scarf hat, they're super tiny! Dwarf.. chaos gremlin-- No that's a changeling! I don't think that's actually a Link, I think they faked their way in. Not that I blame them, its a pretty cool crew to be a part of. Spy for the fae realm.

WILD

5th grade school photo link. He's really excited for his first day of school and has a planner for all of his classes.

Good at navigation? Kudos for being a good boy scout.

Her 2nd favorite.

WILD

"Legolas Link" he likes to run on snow, flip his hair back + forth and shit talk dwarves [changeling doesn't like that]

"takes any questioning of his princess too personally? Why are they questioning his princess in the first place? *squints* Why is he so upset? Feel like maybe we need some codependency therapy-

IDENTITY CRISIS DUE TO MEMORY LOSS???? oh no, there we go, the therapy- INSECURE? THE ONLY ONE THAT FAILED? Dude, I think douchy paladin needs to take him to therapy-, maybe it'll convince him to get some too.

Proceeds to go into a rant about his sheikah tech being called weird magic: "Why are they calling his magic weird? That's rude ! They need to have more open minds, no wonder he's insecure! He just needs to feel confident and supported in his new environment and they're not being very supportive right now!"

*orders another mimosa*

LEGEND [their favorite]

"We've got stoner wizard link..." "Which one?" "He's wearing red, and like a fancy staff with a ball at the end for walloping on people who say he's not a real wizard" He just smacks em and says duh yes I am, but usually he doesn't bother with it bc he's too chill.

He's the Millenial of the linked universe. "Chooses not to be a leader type? 'Nope, Im good, just here for a paycheck not a promotion. Some PTO would be nice. Another adventure? He'd rather start a commune"

"Seems unaffected by his adventures?" Uhh he is though. He's just delusional about it now.

HYRULE

Classic link [true] silent generation, nobody acknowledges him. "just happy to be included," mistaken as a hobbit.

"He's actually a traveler, never stays in one place" "Ah so post adventure Bilbo baggins, who wants to see mountains again."

*starts singing "the road goes ever on and on"*

SKY

Foppy link. Fabulous haircut, cape swooped over one shoulder with the gorgeous coloring, contrasting belt-- he knows color schemes way too well, he could be in project runway.

"Not the leader type? Sure he's too busy worrying about fabric swatches. Views the master sword as a blessing? Yeah, I bet he does."

Very confidently decided his Zelda is a beard.

[midnightwriter21]

demon slayer hcs: how you meet

characters: fem!reader x douma, akaza, sanemi

warnings: language, mention of death, blood, fighting, and attempted sexual assault

DOUMA

douma prefers women

thinks we're ~tasty~

so ur probably out for the night with your girlfriends

havin a lil bit of fun

and unfortunately or fortunately

y'all catch his attention

but he doesn't just swoop in and fuck yall up dw

he's a curious fucker

so he jus watches for a while

mans can watch me for as long as he wants yk what im sayin ;)

anyways

you and your friends run into some trouble

idk what trouble

but trouble

and douma with his bullshit manipulative fake hero complex

waits until the LASTTTTT second

to finally pop in and save you

of course you're terrified of him

he doesn't care

you're going with him

and he's gonna keep you for as long as he wants

hopefully you can keep him entertained ;)

AKAZA

the man i hate to love

rip rengoku :(

similar to douma

except akaza drinks respect women juice for breakfast, lunch, and dinner

so ur out for a night on the town w ur besties

and the trouble you guys run into happens to be group of drunk men

they're aggressive and loud

and even when y'all tell them to fuck off

they dont

they just get rougher

but akaza being the man he is

doesn't let them get the CHANCE to lay a finger on you or your friends

necks broken

spines snapped

and ur just like "wtf jus happened"

def still scared as hell

but he's ur savior

show him ur appreciation *wink wink*

asks if you'll become a demon

if u accept, he'll help you adjust

teach you to fight

if you don't accept

he won't give u any trouble

if he likes u enough he may vow to protect u

love him

SANEMI

idk its jus somethin abt this man

ik he would tear it UP

anyway for him i hc that you would already be a demon slayer yourself

not too highly ranked but you're not a beginner either

you're kinda just eh

but you're on a mission with some other demon slayers

and uh oh

big bad strong demon

sanemi is sent out due to the large amount of casualties

and there you are

with a group of injured slayers to the left of you

and you're holding off the demon

alone

covered in blood

and def terrified

but fighting like hell

when the demon shifts his attention to that group of injured slayers

it shoots toward them and you don't have time to think

throwing urself in front of them and closing ur eyes

bracing for impact

and instead of being shish-kebabed

all you feel is a gust of wind

but then u hear it

"fucking idiot"

yo what

lmfao not what u expected for sure

the demon that was terrorizing u is light work for him

but sanemi was actually impressed that you held out long enough for him to get there

he wont show it but he respects the way you were gonna give your life to protect the injured slayers

he'll cuss you out the whole way back to the butterfly mansion

but maybe he'll offer to train you

sheeshhh ik a way we could train hehe

[agentem]

I listened to a NPR podcast about "Agatha All Along." Two guys complaining that it wasn't feminist because the "sisterhood" is only pretend.

I'm just having a lot of thoughts.

Why does everything starring a woman necessarily need to be feminist? Like Agatha uses her Road con to trick other women into giving her their power, I don't think she's a feminist character. (She literally helps "the patriarchy" bind Jen.) It's her show. So things being a trick make sense for her. I suppose if it had been presented as a fun show about the Coven as a whole I might feel disappointed. But I watched so many press interviews, and it was pretty clear that Kathryn Hahn was the lead and Joe Locke was #2 to me from the beginning.

Am I the only one who doesn't feel like Alice and Lilia's deaths are "for nothing" since the Road is fake? I have mixed feelings about Alice's death, but I was glad they had that scene with Rio to call out how unfair it was. But Alice's natural inclination is to protect, and Agatha's is to take. Teen is correct when he says Agatha didn't deserve Alice. (Still unclear to me why he thinks Agatha can control her powers in the second to last episode because the impression I got was that she could not.) But this is what Agatha has done to many, many women. All those nameless ladies in the montage also had stories and lives to get back to. But we only know Alice's so hers is the only one we feel.

And then I guess with Lilia I love her too much. She sees past her own death. She knows who Teen "becomes." So I do think she still goes to her death knowing what is up. Maybe not knowing everything about how the Road was created and whatnot, but that this is the way she can make a difference with her limited time. And her inclination is to help the Team, not make things easier for herself. So she does. Am I crazy?

[yey56]

Villainous x reader that can dress up and imitate people perfectly

Part two of (same reader):

DR FLUG 🧪:

He was finally getting used to the chaotic bomb you were but one day, while eating in the kitchen he saw someone he didn't recognise walking around the manor.

Terrified his boss would punish him for letting a stranger get into the house, he quickly got up to either shot the stranger or just kick them out.

Imagine the surprise he got when he heard your voice when the stranger talked to him. Flug was found again completely speechless.

You explained that the main reason you always got away with identity theaf and changing names was because you had a talent on imitating others, not only in the physical form (you're a master of disguise 🥸) but also your seem to be able to fully imitate the tone of voice, the expressions used by someone and even they're little gestures.

You were the definition of a skin-walker but instead of using magic or other kind of spells, you used make up, prosthetics and wigs.

Flug didn't believed this at first but after taking your fake nose off and taking out your wig he started believing you.

Now he's a bit more weary of you even if he doesn't admit it. I mean, you can literally turn into whoever you want if you put enough effort so...

Yeah.

You're still on good terms though, he still appreciates you, he's just shocked (give him time)

Also the way you can imitate voices??? He's certainly usign that ability to hack machinery that's needs voice recognition.

This guy has so many questions. But as well sees so much potential in your disguises for his plans.

You have asked him to make you more realistic prosthetics so you can impersonate better people that have different body types.

He admires you're ability to imitate someone so flawlessly he thinks that your ability is great for a villain.

Flug likes you to accompany him when he is making newer and more precise prothesis for you, he thinks that way you can supervise his work and have more perfect customs.

He has seen you dressed as a man, as a women and as neither and you have nailed in every single one of them. (Pansexual crisis for this paper bag).

Now he understands how you can always escape so effortlessly whenever you commit a crime or how you dodge the authorities so well. You're a master of disguise.

In general you're just another big mystery that he will never fully understand but he will still try, and will never give up (though sometimes he is temper BC how similarly chaotic you seem to be to dementia)

DEMENCIA🦎:

If she already loved you before now she adores you.

She discovered your ability because you were in an infiltration mission so you disguised yourself as a rich young man.

To say she was caught off guard is an understatement.

Demencia watched the whole process and she is still absolutely impressed by how quickly and smoothly you are able to just be someone else.

Heck, you even changed your voice to a manly one!!!

You have offered to make it into a double mission and transform her into the trophy wife of your fake identity, you guys are now Richard and Pamela 🙈🙉🙊

She had so much fun pretending to be some snobby asshole just to later take out a metal bat from her hair and starting hitting the authorities to escape with the money you stole.

I think she loves to dress up and play pretend so you guys do that very often in your free time just for fun.

She weirdly plays along whenever you are "being someone else" for example.

You need to dress up as some old lady so you do the whole disguise and act and talk strictly as the old lady you "are". Well, even after the mission is done, as long as you still are behaving like the character and being in the disguise she treats you like the old woman you damn are!! 👵

Flug: you know she is still the same reader we know and not Enriqueta right?

Demencia: shit up nerd! How dare you disrespect Enriqueta!!!

Enriqueta (Reader): -clearly trying to annoy Flug- this youth is only going to worse

Demencia: damn right grandma.

Flug: absolutely gives up*

She so supportive of whoever you are at the moment.

Also she gets along better with some of your other identities than with others, she once fought you when you were acting as an old ass man (Julian) because he just wouldn't stop being an asshole. (She then apologised to you because after all you're the one recieving the physical punch as well ❤️‍🩹)

Idk man demencia is so chaotic that nothing normal can be expected from her.

Has asked you to try and dress up as the boss for a while but you turned it down knowing it can only go downhill.

Black hat 🎩:

It's strangely supporting of your identities.

I mean, just as demencia, if you are dressed as one of your characters he will address you as them.

Like, for example if Enriqueta fucked it up on something, then he will be saying some nasty stuff about old people but if Richard is the one to do something wrong then he's being sent straight to the resort (and you of course)

Black hat: Enriqueta, your pay will be cut due to your kidney operation

Enriqueta (reader): oh lord 🥺

A few moments later

Reader: hey, wait a minute, Enriqueta didn't have any kidney operation. She will be reclaiming the money

Black hat: she will need one if you don't stop spitting nonsense on her behalf. Oh, and tell Richard that he is getting slow with his work, it would be a shame to also cut his pay 😈

Reader: 🤐

He uses your talent to annoy you from time to time, even though the cut of pay is never to big or to long, since you always end up getting the same salary. He only does it to see you losing it.

And when you are yourself he tell you to control "the others" 🫨

All in all, he somehow respect your amazing ability of impersonating someone, in fact he has made you impersonate some heroes or some of their families just so he can have information about them. You are the perfect spy

And of course since every single one of your personalities has an specific ability or career, he benefits from that. Your like a whole bunch of people in only one.🪆

Has threatened you that, if somehow you ever managed to impersonate him even if only physically, he will make you regret having a skin 😶

It's not really that often when you impersonate someone or dress up as someone else mainly because it takes time to make it perfect, which is what he demand. Therefore he has sent dementia to kidnapped the subject of impersonification for you to study they're face, features and gestures.

Has once or twice kicked you out of the manor when you were dressed as someone else. He knew it was you, he always knows it's you but just to bother you or make your work harder he will do it.

He respects your identities as much as he respects any of his employees which isn't much but hey, at least he doesn't necessarily discriminate against them :).

As you are very VERY attentive and always notice every single detail of things, he often ask you about trivial things that might not be so trivial.

He had the decency kindness to mention you as an excellent example of a skin-walker.

Even though you have no powers, being a simple human, you manage yourself more than well and thats enough for him no to kill you.

505 🐻:

Just as Flug, he was afraid for seeing someone unknown in the manor but after a very VERY long explanation from Flug and you he somehow started assimilating it.

He doesn't treat your other identities as themselves about as you, that's because he doesn't really grasp the whole concept so he just assumes it's you in a really good custom

( he doesn't that you really put yourself in the character to the point of being other personalities you have in yourself)

His favourite personality is Enriqueta because with her he can bake and cook really good meals and because she gives him candy 🍭.

Always treats your clothes really carefully because he knows they mean a lot to you (and because they cost a lot of money 💰)

Just like everyone else, 505 doesn't really understand how you change appearance and personality so quicky, you almost do it automatically.

Every single one of your personalities dotes on the blue bear except Julian, but that's because he's an asshole.

Doesn't think much about it, he just goes with it since it's part of you and still loves you the same.

[postersofleon]

Selfish

After many years of surviving the worst years of her life, [_] is tired and pissed that Leon and Ada have each other. So, in a small moment with Ada, she decided to ask Ada how she manages to keep people in love with her.

content: story with smut

notes: afab, no assigned race to reader and she/her pronouns ; re4 era; leon and reader are best friends, reader is confused but not hateful; ada is a sweetheart to reader; leon and ada aren't dating; implied that reader survived Raccoon City with leon

"I just don't see what Leon sees in you." Once she said it, she felt like a complete dick for saying it. She rubbed her face feeling her blood rushing through her face, "I don't mean it like that." She tried to explain to Ada.

Ada laughed softly, "I'm use to jealousy, honey. It's fine." She flipped her hair back as she looked at Leon's partner.

"That's not what I meant." She muttered again, she looked at Ada and kind of saw what Leon saw in Ada. Ada was an incredibly beautiful woman; her short black hair and those eyes that forced you to see her. But there was confusion approaching her once again, [_] rested her body on a table and looked at Ada. "You two kissed once six years ago, you ended being being liar and wanted to steal the g virus for an obviously bad guy. And you have Leon tied up in your finger. That's like insane." She was genuinely impressed by Ada. Especially that Ada faked her death and appeared like nothing ever happened.

Ada laughed softly again, "I'm not sure if it's an attack or a compliment but thank you?"

"That's what's I mean- you did all that shit and you have Leon still enamored by you. Does this usually happen?" [_] got closer to Ada with a huge wonder in her eyes. Ada laughed again. "This is new." She looked at [_] with the same curious way. The two women looked at each other, both waiting for an answer; Ada waiting for her answer of why [_] isn't jealous and [_] waiting for the answer if this happens.

"This is usually the normal in my life. Men are attractive to mystery, once they know what's wrong..." Ada crossed her arms against her chest, "They get angry or they try to fix you." Ada brushes her hair away from her face. [_] put her hands underneath her chin as she continued to look at Ada. "So, men... men are weak?" She asked slowly.

Now, Ada laughed loudly, "Men are complicated." She said amused from her words. "Leon is a guy who wants to be loved so that's what ties him up to me." [_] rolled her eyes but there was a trace of playfulness in them, "That's dumb." She whispered with a smile. She stood up from the table and stretched her bones. "Like how? He met you six years ago..." She whined softly feeling the bones finally relaxing softly. Her arms returned back to her body.

"I just think the real reason Leon likes you is because you're hot." She said throwing Ada a finger gun towards her. It made more sense that Leon had that idea around Ada; once again, Ada isn't not attractive.

"Leon has to be more complicated than that." Ada said trying to defend Leon but [_] shook her head. "How?" She laughed softly, there was a small pause between the two women as Ada shrugged as her heels clicked on the marble floor. "Leon got the survivor's guilt and the hero complex. It makes sense why he felt guilty about your 'death', but he obviously hurt by something imaginary that happened between you two." [_] said trying to make her point.

Ada looked at [_], "And you? Are you hurt?"

[_] shrugged, "I don't know," She grabbed her knife and started carving the table, "I just... I'm more disappointed that you were a mercenary for bad." She said looking at Ada. She licked her lips and smack them together, "You are doing bad things for a lousy paycheck." Ada smiled lightly at [_]'s words. "You don't hate me?" Her eyes focused on hers, [_]'s cheeks began to burn from the intense stare.

"After all the things I do and did," Ada said, "You don't hate me?" She teased her.

[_] twirled her knife in her hand, "I suppose I do." She admitted, "But I don't know why you are doing this job." Her eyes were completely soft and gentle for Ada, "Or aren't you just like us? Forced to work?"

Ada pursed her lips together as she looked up at the ceiling, "Ugh," She looked at her, "You want things to go in a perfect little box." Ada chewed on her lips as she approached [_], "Forced." She sighed softly. It seemed like she hated those words, "You two were forced but this was my saving grace. This lifestyle saved my life." Ada looked at her with a tiny smile.

Ada's intense stare lowered, "I like you," Ada whispered to [_], "At least you don't try to give me the typical speech of saving me, but you're annoying with that comment." Ada grabbed her knife and began craving the table, "You need to understand this world existed under your nose this whole time. The existence of zombies didn't make it appear, bad people exist and not all of them are forced to exist in that world."

[_] put her chin on the table as she saw Ada's hands, "What are you? Do you enjoy this or didn't have an option?"

"Didn't have one but I don't complain like you." Ada muttered, "I believe I have the right to complain," [_] said bitterly, "I was not meant for this life. I wish I could've died if I knew this is what I had to do."

Ada laughed.

It wasn't the simple laugh that she once heard come from her mouth, it sounded a bit cruel that [_] rolled her eyes. "You say you want to die but you don't know what death is." Ada stabbed the knife to the table causing her jump back, Ada smirked from her reaction. "Aren't you afraid at least a bit?" Ada asked.

"Who isn't?" She remarked, "But I think considering our work, we are scared of the consequences of our deaths. Me and Leon are here to save the president's daughter and you are here for something. None of us want to die but it's not the selfish way."

Ada's eyes narrowed. "Have you done anything selfish?" Ada asked.

"No."

"I have," Ada said with a smile but the smile slowly faded away, "But being selfish has its consequences." She looked at her for a second, "Being selfish," Ada continued, "Unfortunately is part of human nature. You haven't been a human then." And by cue, [_] groans, "What is being selfish in this world?"

She let's out a small chuckle before grabbing her knife, "Letting people die for a paycheck? Being in love with some random girl you met six years ago and now focusing all your energy in saving her and make an excuse that it's because you are good person? Money and sex. That's what fucking makes people selfish- stupid excuses."

"You sound jealous." Ada said.

"About what?" She slapped her hands on her thighs, clearly frustrated- not understanding what Ada wanted from her. "About what?" She approached Ada's face. "Leon is my best friend. He means the world to me and seeing him act like a fool... that's what pisses me off." Ada smiled and touched her arm, it was a gentle touch and [_] hated it. "So, you have never acted like a fool?" Ada asked with a mocking grin in her face.

She pulled away her hand from Ada's, "That's not the point."

"What's the point? [_], you want to be selfish like all of us." Ada said slowly, "You aren't jealous of him and I. You're full of envy that you can't be like us. The most selfish thing you said you wanted was death, and we had too many deaths in this world. Why not be actually selfish?" Ada was being gentle and [_] immediately recognized it. She saw that six years ago when Ada kissed Leon.

"You are just trying to manipulate me." She whispered softly, her eyes rolled as she stood up. "Is that all you do? Just manipulate people with kisses and touches? Six years ago, Leon was the toy you decided to play with, and now that Leon isn't here.... I'm the new chew toy." [_] took a deep breath in. "Be selfish somewhere else. Don't include me in your bullshit."

Ada saw as Leon's partner left the room.

Then, those couple of days passed. No more mission and the president's daughter was saved thanks to Leon's stubbornness and [_]'s anger towards the fight. They were back in American soil, she was taking a long hot shower trying to ease up her tense body. She left the shower room and quickly headed towards Leon, "Hey." She waved politely to Leon. Leon nodded his head, "Hey." They began to walk down the streets, she exhaled softly with a bored expression. These were moments she liked hanging out with Leon, just silent moments between them and they were always peaceful.

"Hey, Leon. Can I ask you something?" She asked him. Leon nodded his head, "Yeah, I don't see why not."

"Do... do you sexually like Ada?"

Leon didn't expect that question, his cheeks turned red, "Why would you ask that?" He turned to see her, "Um, no." He played with his faux blond hair.

"You are lying," [_] quickly said, "You always talk about how Ada broke your heart in Raccoon City. She betrayed your trust and blah blah. You remember more her fake death than Marvin's real death."

Leon sighed softly, "I'm more... pissed, [_]." He replied, he was struggling to use his words properly. "Ada made me realize that horrible people exist everywhere, but you made me realize that good people exist as well." He cleared his throat awkwardly. Her eyes lowered, "So, no?"

"No." Leon said with a small smile. The friends continued to walk until a cab separated them, she entered the cab and waved a goodbye to Leon. Once she was alone, she let out a small exhale through her lips. Her hands rubbed against her face as another shakey sigh escaped. She rested her head on the window as her mind felt like mess.

She thought about Ada and Leon.

Ugh.

Once arriving at her apartment, she sat on her couch still feeling beyond tired; her apartment was lonely still. All the items in her room were things she needed all but things of pleasure. She laid on her couch feeling all her emotional feelings rot inside of her.

Was she broken to live? Ada is right. [_] hasn't been selfish since forever since the beginning of her life. She is always worrying for others... when they are okay. She nuzzled against her pillows and let out a loud groan, she wanted to sleep forever now.

More days passed, she was just laying on her couch not moving and not doing anything else. She tapped her fingers in a small rhythm, her eyes looked at them. First her index, her middle, her ring and pinkie. Then, it was pinkie, middle, index and ring.

Someone knocked on her door, the were the typical Leon's knocks. Soft and polite with a dash of strength. She sat up in her couch, her feet dragged against the ground, "I'm coming." Her hand touched the door knob and indeed there was Leon. "[_], wanna drink?" He forced a smile at his best friend. She rested her body on her door frame, "I rather not. I feel that emptiness inside of me already," A small laugh escaped her throat, "I'll be addicted once it touches my lips." She whispered.

Leon smiled sadly, "That bad, huh?"

[_] nodded her head.

"That sucks." He whispered, his blue eyes went down and smiled back at her. "We'll be at the Blue's bar so if you want to still come." [_] smiled, "Will do." Leon left her alone in the hallway of her apartment. She closed the door and sat down back in her couch; her life is just turning into am endless hell for no reason. Another knock appeared in her door, she didn't recognize the knock, she grabbed her knife and twirled it around. Her breathing was small and focused, making sure the other person won't hear.

"C'mon, I won't hurt you."

Her nose twitched, "Ada?" She didn't lower her knife, "Why are you here?" The agent asked, their knife gently tapped on the wall, but Ada groaned softly to herself. "Don't be stubborn." A small sign of defeat appeared in [_]'s face as she unlocked the door. And there was Ada Wong. Her jet black bobbed hair neatly pinned away her eyes with a golden butterfly pin that she was sure she saw with the merchant. [_] took notice that Ada was in disguise, this isn't the clothes that [_] imagined Ada wore in her free time.

But still, she had her trademarked red color around her neck as a scarf.

Ada smiled and she smiled back.

"Why are you here?" She asked carefully still holding her knife but now away from Ada's view. "I wanted to teach you about being selfish." She entered the apartment. [_] threw her knife on the coffee table, Ada didn't seem to have super intentions.

[_] shut the door behind her, "Meaning?" She was utterly confused. But Ada had her thought settled into something she didn't expect. "I have been checking on you," Ada looked around the empty apartment, "You stay in one place more than Leon does." Ada's brown eyes met the agent, that when [_] realized that Ada doesn't necessarily smile- she misunderstood. Ada smirked and apparently smirked her way to the top.

"I'm tired. I got myself beaten up." [_] shrugged.

The two women looked at each other with that small distance between them. "Tough job." Ada sat down on her couch, [_] took way too much notice of Ada's clothing. Ada's beauty is a curse and they both knew it. "Yeah, I'm guessing your own job is hard as well."

Ada smirked again, her hand gently touched [_]'s hand and slowly pulled her to the couch with her. "Yeah. I'm going to teach you how to deal with the job when it's stresses you out. " Ada whispered softly. [_] closed her eyes trying to ignoring her lust.

She had two types of lust. The one that made hr vulnerable and the one that she used to use during one night stands when she was in college. [_] is trying to control her vulnerable side as Ada's hands rubbed her stomach gently to hold her waist. Her lips met her neck and kissed the agent.

It felt so good to be touched like this.

Shit.

Slowly, her head tilted and Ada found it as a chance to get on top of the agent, her knees were on the both sides of thighs. Ada's lips were on her jaw, her hands traced [_]'s skin gently and cupped her breast. Ada tugged the bra, her hand to cupped the agent's chest and gently scratched the sensitive skin.

The apartment was quiet. All that was heard was small gasping and the kissing Ada gave the neck. Soon, their lips finally touched, Ada cupped the agent's face as she attempted to suck on her lower lip. It was pure desperation as the women tried to hold each other. Ada removed her hand from underneath the shirt to hold her face properly. Ada put her tongue inside of her mouth in attempts to make this kiss last longer.

As [_] was kissed, an alarm came into her mind- Ada is using her. It was so obvious. Why would this beautiful woman kiss her in this manner? Ada had better options than her. She gently pulled away from Ada'a kiss and looked at her. Ada's cheeks were red, her eyes dilated... she needed more. [_]'s hand gently caressed Ada's face, Ada's face was so soft- it seemed to be like Ada was like a fragile doll that you weren't allowed to touch. It was hard to truly know a woman like this.

[_] took a small breath in, "So, now what?" She whispered softly.

Ada smirked but it was much softer than the first ones, "Well, I can give you a small favor." She slowly got herself into her knees as [_] looked down feeing a bit awkward. Ada's hands on the waistline of the sweats and slowly slide the off, [_]'s body tensed up. It had been a while since she had someone between her thighs, Ada's hands slowly took off the panties, "You owe me after this one." Ada gently kissed her thighs, and the kisses were slowly getting closer and closer to that spot.

Goodness, she hasn't even touched herself since she became an agent. [_]'s head tilted back on the couch, the feeling of Ada'a breath so close to there drove her a bit crazy. Her heart was pounding against her chest.

Ada got herself closer and closer until Ada was in the folds. Then, Ada's tongue gently moved around her pussy but completely avoiding the clit. Both of the women's breathing increased, Ada's fingers grabbed her thighs and squeezed them with her finger tips. Ada's tongue flattened and pressed itself completely on [_]'s pussy. It gently touched the clit.

There was no moaning or anything too much. It was just those tiny gasps escaping [_]'s lips. "Mmm..." It was all the escaped her throat.

Ada's tongue flicked over and over on her clit but gently sucking it. Her thighs quickly clenched up to try to keep Ada between her legs, but Ada was stronger as she pushed the legs open again with her hands. "Wait," Ada's voice was a bit hoarse, "I'm not done yet."

Ada's thin yet long fingers opened her pussy and licked the hole. [_] whined softly as her hips buckled against Ada's tongue, Ada's fingers slowly entered inside and pumping them gently in and out. [_] was so wet that they slide in and out without an issue. Ada's tongue was simulating her clit as the fingers pumped in and out.

The agent's breathing was turning into small pants, "Ada, fuck, Ada...." Her voice was whiny, her cunt clenched around Ada's fingers and it was making weaker as she felt Ada going a bit faster. Before she knew it, the agent released her juices on Ada's fingers. Ada moaned softly, "Good girl." Ada whispered softly. Her tongue dragged up the folds and cleaned up the cum, "That was good wasn't it? You didn't even think twice of having a mercenary between your pussy." Ada sat up in the couch, "You needed it so badly, didn't you?"

Ada wanted to tease the poor agent with those cruel words though Ada didn't expect [_] to cup her face. Another kiss where it kept Ada underneath the woman, [_]'s rough hands were on Ada's waist and slowly slid down to Ada's ass. She squeezed her ass gently, Ada was surprised but everything that was happening however in [_]'s mind was clear.

Ada was right.

She did need this.

Fighting those never ending monsters. Being smacked around by them, feeling your body take in all the pain in the world yet no drop of pleasure. No chance to be selfish.

[_] slowly pulled away from Ada's pink lips, "Sorry, I'm just..." Her eyes trailed away, "Tired." Ada smiled. "It happens." Ada whispered softly, her hand gently caressed the agent's face. "So, may I?" [_] asked her.

Ada looked confused at the woman's question, "You what?"

"You said I owed you so... it's my turn."

[alatabouleau]

I just kinda need to get this off my chest because I've kinda been falling down a rabbithole on the wrong side of the internet... So, it all started with me watching the BBC documentary about the Burning-Sun-case that was randomly recommended to me...

And it just makes me sooo mad! That Seungri, JJY and all the others have now all served their sentence already, they just continue as before, no lessons learned, and there are STILL people who support them!!!?? And I am so desolated because it shows how deep our impressions of patriarchy and internalised misogyny goes that we would let them off the hook that easily. Meanwhile, two women unalived themselves in relation to the crimes of these people. More still are scarred for live by their actions. And the worst of all? That this is nothing new. This has happened before almost all around the world and how often were women even denied to speak the truth?

Rammstein's investigation was just dropped.

Nicky from Backstreet Boys got out pretty unbothered.

And even if they are convicted, many people scream "death of the author" and continue in their ignorance.

And I do not know how to deal with that. I don't have the answer to solve this. But I do not want to stop being bothered by this. Because the moment we become numb because of how often this has already occurred, the more normal this will be.

And I never want to accept this horrendous violence against women as normal. This has to stop.

And in that same breath, I do NOT understand why people keep bringing up T.O.P.'s drug thing WHEN SEUNGRI WAS LITERALLY HIS FELLOW BAND MEMBER. How does this compare, even come remotely close? Yes, not everything that man did was healthy, but like... how does this concern you? FAMOUS. PEOPLE. DON'T. OWE. YOU. ANYTHING.

I haven't seen Squid game 2 in its entirety simply because that series is not my vibe, but from what I've seen from his performance, he did pretty alright imo. At least, not in a way that would justify the hate towards him. Also, I am so annoyed by the uncharitable interpretations of his actions that I've seen all around. So he left Big Bang. So he blocked G-Dragon on Instagram. What is it to you? After that whole sh*t show, how can you blame him? In Germany, we had a pretty famous a-capella-group called Wise Guys. After their 25 year-anniversary, suddenly (so it seemed) the group disbanded. Through this, two of the band members who always seemed the closest fell completely out of touch and as far as the public knows, are still not on speaking terms even after 8 years. I made the mistake of telling one of them as I met him at the Protestant church convention that I always loved Wise Guys and got a pretty cold response. Does that mean that everything the Wise Guys ever did was fake? No. Neither that either of those people are a-holes per se. We simply do not know what happened behind the curtains. And those were middle-aged men that hadn't HALF of the scandals and sh*t going on that BigBang had to deal with. Add to this mental health problems and different coping mechanisms and you got a fine molotov cocktail of relationship complications. I think why this discourse hits me so much is because I relate in two points to T.O.P.'s story as far as I know it(!)

I, too, left a toxic environment for myself a little over a year ago. I left my church. I still struggle with this because this used to be such a HUGE part of my identity. Also, my family still belongs to it. That's exactly why, on some days I cannot STAND it when people still call me newapostolic. Yes sometimes, I still do that myself but I would probably make a harder cut if I could. So I understand perfectly if he wants no longer be associated with the name BigBang after leaving the K-Pop-industry. On the other hand, I had a friend who went to the same church. A best friend. Ride-or-die. And we had a comeplete fall-out. Not because we did not care for each other anymore, not because we hated each other. But because we both had so many similar issues and our coping mechanisms started to make us hurt each other.

Deeply.

And even to this day, I cannot really talk to her anymore. Because our friendship reminds me of that time that felt so horrendously bad for me.

Because of these two things, I understand the need for a hard-cut oh-so-well. And I would wish for T.O.P. to get it. Is that interpretation the absolute truth of what happened? No. Because no one of us outside knows it. I just wanted to show that there are interpretations where you don't have to make anyone involved The Bad Guy(tm). I wish Choi Seunghyun all the best.

And those mentioned in the first part of this post... having to grasp and live with the whole amount of pain they caused others.

[tithe2hell]

thoughts (aroace fujoshism, sexuality of "play" vs "real" idk idk)

Fujoism is a really funny experience...I don't sexually get off to men and I don't find it attractive in the arousal sense and yet I find gay sex really aesthetically calming and fun... I feel like the way I articulate my fujoisms feels often like the way very chill straight men talk about their no homo aesthetic appreciation of guys and homoeroticism, as like an intriguing concept, perhaps on some level "locked out" of experiencing it in the "real" internal inherent appreciative way but still feeling impressed somehow.

I don't really feel a mournfulness or fomo-leading-to-self-actualization the way say, some of the usual timeline of like the fujos who turn out to be gay transmasc are, since I don't rly care to be a participant. And ig i feel different than the lesbian fujos since I don't feel the men are stand-ins for women or a general queer attraction necessarily. I think for me a lot of it is the pleasure of feeling "Outside" or other (the fujo cuck chair, as one expresses). Idk I think sex is fun and interesting as a subject and expression of characters and their desires, not *despite* not wanting it but maybe specifically *because* of not understanding or connecting to it.

Thinking about this because of a minor personal conflict earlier with a former friend which was sad and frustrating to me bc it was like they could not believe or understand that I, or other aroaces for that matter, could have interest in making art or consuming art about sexual subjects and being invested in such works emotionally without it being idk a symptom of being in a state of unhealthy sexual repression.

I think this made me really self conscious for a long while and also sad. Because of acephobia lol but also in a more vain sense, about my skills. Either one can be good at making sexually themed art, and that means you must be secretly Really Full of 'real' desires you're using art as a cheap substitute to idk avoid Living Your True Life. Or I'm just idk a freak who doesn't understand will never understand and any attempts at making art about this subject for which I am an outsider will look ridiculous, shallow, and insulting to the Real Sexuality Experiencers. And why should I even bother, huh!

The thing is I think for a lot of my experiences, both irl and artistic, I think a lot of it feels kind of...if not fake, like some sort of external performance more than internal since I don't have that internal desire drive I guess. I draw gay sex, I don't experience it, but I enjoy the concept about it. I kissed my lesbian friends and shared beds and space and showers w them and felt nothing inherently desirous about it in my body but I value the experience and intimate trust as something meaningful and fun. I've never had sex and don't particularly want to but I feel that if I ever did it would be a similar feeling of outsider-play, an appreciation from the outside of experience but nothing inherently bodily meaningful the way it is for other people. I guess this is where kink comes in for some but I don't think about it in terms of kink necessarily.

anyways just some thoughts. I feel my relationship to sexuality TLDR is just that to me it all feels fake and unreal but in a playful way, I don't mean to deny other ppl the way it is Real and Weighty and Impactful to their lives. I think this may be part of the reason why some dudes get pissed off at Fujos for the "fetishization" it's bc they're maybe doing the weight vs lightness thing....a sexual orientation and life identity is Serious Business vs the triviality of yaoi. Which I can respect, but also I think it ignores how the "triviality" of works is also not in itself identity, but Artistic Exploration, which by nature must have stylized playfulness to it that is not necessarily always attached to reality (although knowledge of reality always adds to art.) different goals exist then, to live vs. to create for its own sake. For many it overlaps but I do think they are different goals. And the frustration happens when ppl mix up the play-fake with the real, and that aspect I think goes both ways (the infamous anecdotes of the fujos harassing gay ppl like characters, but also of random dudes getting mad at someone posting an obviously fictional story or explicit sexual fantasy and being like "how could u fetishize MEEEEE" the boundaries being broken down in those instances)