#OUT OF ALL GAMES I WISH I COULD FORGET AND REPLAY

[skoulsons]

am i experiencing real sadness bc I’ll never relive GoT completely blind again and I’ll never hear certain lines that ripped my soul out of me for the first time ever again and I won’t get to fully experience the tradgedy of it all for the first time? yes

[xcherricutie]

🌺 drift away 🌺

[Lucifer Morningstar x Reader]

[Part One] [Part Two] [Part Three] [Part Four]

[Word Count - 1.4k]

[Tags: Angst, songfic (I can't help myself)]

[Notes: My first Hazbin Hotel one shot. Still new to Tumblr, and new to writing one shots, I'm used to writing longer form. Hope this post is up to the standard. It's like, 1 in the morning and I have work tomorrow morning, enjoy. I will hopefully get out a part that's kinda like a prequel, I wanna do Other Friends lol. Obvs inspired by Steven Universe.]

Let’s go in the garden, 

You’ll find something waiting, 

Right there where you left it, 

Lying upside down...

Excitement shot through your system, your feet dragging along the ground as a giggle bubbled from within you. You paused every few seconds as the man before you looked back, a single brow raised at your antics. He took a few steps forward, the sounds of your feet tapping as you followed along filling the air. He sighed, turning around. His eyes, golden sclera and deep red irises, landed on your own, though unfocused. Almost as if looking straight through you. 

He’d tried to keep you here, to stop you from following. He knew you were only doing what you were meant to do. You were made for him. An angel born purely to keep Lucifer in check, to keep him happy. You loved being by his side, you loved spending time with him on Earth, in the garden. You thought he loved it too. You thought he loved you. 

Taking a deep breath, Lucifer forced a smile for you. His wings softly flapped behind him, lifting him off the ground, raising him to be just above your face level. His finger tapped your nose, his enchanting voice coming through. “Here in the garden, let’s play a game, I’ll show you how it’s done.” 

“Here in the garden, stand very still,” His hands on your shoulders, you looked up at him with a beaming smile, happy to spend time with your love. 

“This’ll be so much fun,” Your voice, soft and delicate spoke, earning a smile from him. Your heart fluttered at his smile, his cheeks crinkling slightly as his eyes closed, appearing relaxed. At least to you. But appearances weren’t all what they seemed. 

“And then he smiled, that’s what I’m after,” You clenched a fist, pressing it to your chest, trying to calm your fast beating heart. You could feel the eyes of the demon behind you on you, the very demon that came from him. “The smile in his eyes, the sound of his laughter.” 

You could see the scene replaying before you all over again. You could even hear the soft chuckle that had once escaped his lips, his hands softly squeezing your shoulders. You knew she could see it too, but you didn’t want to acknowledge the memories that had begun to rush back to you, memories from long ago. Memories you’d wished you could forget. 

“Happy to listen, happy to play, happily watching him drift away...” 

Lucifer’s grip loosened on your shoulders, his wings flapping as he pulled away, leaving you to your little game. You watched him fly into the bright sky, disappearing in the light of the sun with another. But you didn’t think anything of it, because he loved you. He was playing with you, spending time with you. 

The girl behind you could only watch in silence, her throat squeezing closed as she tried to keep her inner turmoil to herself. She knew exactly where she was, exactly where you had taken her. The wilted bushes, the out-of-control bramble, the spiraling roots through the grass. This was the long-abandoned Garden of Eden. This was where it all began. Where Charlie’s father, Lucifer, had started humanity’s spiral into chaos, starting with you. 

“Happily waiting, all on my own, under the endless sky...” You glanced up to the stars dotting the night sky. Everything seemed to be happening so fast. You never wanted anyone to see this, you never even wanted to see it again yourself. Yet, here you were, sharing your vulnerability with the person you’d come down to Hell to kill. The princess of Hell herself, and Lucifer’s daughter, Charlie. You had let her in, showing her your memories. “Counting the seconds, standing alone, as thousands of years go by...” 

The roots had begun to cling to your still form, your body aching, your wings begging to be spread once more. Your hair, once something you had been proud of, now in shambles, grown out nearly to your feet. Deep bags had sunk into the skin under your eyes, a telling sign of your exhaustion. For how much longer must this game go on, you wondered, but never dared voice it. You were meant to make him happy, right? 

“Happily wondering, night after night, is this how it works? Am I doing it right?” Your fists clenched, unable to bear looking at your old self any longer, watching as your sickened form disappeared, turning into speckles of gold in the wind. You stepped forward into the place where you had once showed Charlie your older memories, resuming the familiar stance you had been in for over ten thousand years. “Happy to listen, happy to stay, happily watching him drift away...” 

A cool breeze blew through your hair, reminding you of the countless nights you took solace in the feeling, the only thing that reminded you that you were still alive, still conscious. Your eyes met Charlie’s, a faint smile on her face as you spotted the tears welling in her eyes. You turned away with the breeze, taking a step in the opposite direction of Charlie, startling her as she was quick to follow. 

“You keep on turning pages, for people who don’t care, people who don’t care about you,” 

You walked along the edge of a pond, legs brushing against the soft petals of the flowers surrounding the pond. The breeze pulled along the flowers, a long dead water lily being ripped from the ground. Grasping the weakened petals of the flower in your hand, you turned to Charlie with a soft smile, placing the flower in her blonde hair that felt just the same as his. Just as you pulled your hand away, turning your attention to the water, the flower crumpled in her hair, falling apart. 

“And still, it takes you ages, to see that no one’s there, see that no one’s there, see that no one’s there, everyone’s gone on without you...” Your eyes drifted back to the spot you had become a part of for so long. The spot you thought would one day claim you and set you free from the pain that he’d left behind in you. Charlie’s eyes followed, her eyes widening to see more of your memories, more of what her father had caused. 

“Finally, something.” 

The two seraphims, Sera and Emily, stood before you, fear and sorrow written across their faces. Emily ripped roots that had grown to hold you down tightly off, while Sera ran her fingers through your broken hair, tears streaming down her face. 

“Finally, news, about how the story ends.” 

Sera rambled on and on about everything you had missed. About how humanity had progressed. About the angels that had replaced you in society. Everybody thought you were dead, at the hands of the Devil. You didn’t understand any of it, not until she explained just what had happened, why you were even standing here, playing this game. 

“He isn’t an angel anymore, fallen long ago, leaving you for Lilith, and his brand-new daughter...” 

“Isn’t that lovely?” 

Tears streamed down Charlie’s face as she watched your younger self burst into tears, sobbing violently into Sera’s chest as she hugged you tightly, muttering useless apologies over and over. You cried and screamed, telling her to stop lying and to bring you to Lucifer, to end this game already. You begged and pleaded, telling her that it wasn’t like that, that he loved you, he asked you to stay and play with him. He couldn’t abandon you. You were his angel, his love. 

“Isn’t that cool?” 

You ignored the pain that squeezed your heart, watching as your memories faded in those familiar golden glimmers, begging that this would be the final time you’d have to see them. You ignored the hot tears that dripped down your cheeks, your emotions leaking through, escaping the tight hold you’d kept them in for so many years. 

“And isn’t that cruel? And aren’t I a fool to have happily listened, happy to stay, happily watching him drift, drift...” 

You squeezed a fist to your chest, your heart slowing down finally as you sighed deeply. This was the end. This garden, where everything had begun, would finally see the end of the story. Where you would finally let go of the memories that haunted you for ten thousand years, and move on with your life, putting an end to his little game. 

“Drift away...” 

[flowersforthosewhoneeds]

" I needed a reason "

⚠ Warning : Heavy angst on this chapter.. ⚠

long chapter.

Part 4 of " I wish it was me" "

Click here, to listen to the song while reading!

bought to you, by "Getaway Car" by Taylor Swift

.

.

The knock on your door was soft yet persistent.

“[Y/N],” Wanda’s voice called gently, “Girls' night. We’re not letting you stay holed up in here.”

You groaned, tossing the blanket off of you. The remnants of last night's tears still lingered, your body exhausted, but your heart restless. Wanda wouldn’t stop until she had you out there so you dragged yourself out of bed, wiping away the last traces of the emotional storm that had swept through you.

At The Club

You were already three drinks in, trying to drown the pain, but it felt like an ocean inside you. The noise, the flashing lights, the laughter around you it was all a blur. But you couldn’t shake the image of Loki, of his icy touch, his cruel words.

"It was the best of times, the worst of crimes," the music thudded in your ears, and it was like a truth you couldn’t escape. Loki had been everything your best and worst moment.

Your gaze drifted to Wanda, who was speaking to someone on the dance floor. You could barely focus on her. Instead, your mind kept replaying the memory of Loki’s last words. "I'm not what you think I am."

“I struck a match and blew your mind," the song continued, the lyrics matching your emotions perfectly. Loki had blown your mind, had you believing he could care, believing there was something real, only for it to come crashing down.

"But I didn't mean it and you didn't see it," the line echoed in your head. You knew it. He didn’t mean it. He didn’t see you, the way you saw him. You were just a distraction, an afterthought in his cold, godly life. And it was crushing you, piece by piece.

"Let’s get you a drink," Wanda pulled you back from your spiraling thoughts, guiding you toward the bar.

You nodded numbly, your heart still tangled in Loki's shadows. The weight of your feelings felt unbearable. You couldn’t let it go. You couldn’t just forget him.

But you tried.

A random guy approached you at the bar, offering a smile that seemed a little too knowing. You didn’t care. You didn’t even look at his face. You leaned in, pressing your lips to his, searching for some kind of release, something to make you forget Loki’s name, his coldness, the ache in your chest.

The guy’s lips were warm, but it wasn’t Loki. It didn’t feel like him. You broke away, breathless, the song still pulsing in your mind.

"I knew it from the first Old Fashioned, we were cursed," the lyrics swirled around you. That’s what this felt like. A curse. From the moment Loki had stepped into your life, everything had been a game, a mess of emotions and deceit.

You forced a smile and pulled away from the stranger. "Sorry," you said, feeling foolish.

You didn’t want this. You didn’t want to pretend that someone else could fill the empty space Loki had left in your heart.

You turned away from the bar, searching for an escape, but the weight of the world kept following you. And then, the lyrics hit, sharp and brutal:

"X marks the spot where we fell apart, He poisoned the well, I was lyin' to myself."

That was it. Loki had poisoned everything, and you’d let it happen. You’d lied to yourself, believing there was something real, something that could come from his indifference, his coldness.

You could almost hear his voice in your ear again, cold as ice: "I can’t give you what you want."

"You were drivin' the getaway car We were flyin', but we'd never get far," the song played on, and you felt it deep in your bones. You were his getaway car, weren’t you? You were the one he used to escape, the one he turned to when everything else was falling apart. But you never went anywhere. The distance between you two always grew, and you were always left standing in the dust.

You felt like you were stuck, trapped in this endless loop with no way out. You knew it. "We never had a shotgun shot in the dark."

"Don’t pretend it’s such a mystery," the song continued, and your heart clenched. You knew him. You knew Loki. He wasn’t a mystery to you. But he was still a puzzle, one you’d never solve.

The Morning After

You woke up to the empty bed, the sting of yesterday’s mistakes lingering on your lips. The guy, the kiss, it had all been an attempt to erase Loki, but nothing could. He was still there, in the back of your mind, in your heart.

"It was the great escape, the prison break, The light of freedom on my face," the song played on, and you could hear the truth in it. You thought you could escape him, but it was always a lie.

The song echoed in your mind, the reminder that nothing good came from this. "No, nothing good starts in a getaway car."

The night had been full of distractions, but it had all been a lie, hadn’t it? Just like the kiss. Just like everything you’d tried to do to escape the truth.

Loki wasn’t your escape. He wasn’t a savior. He was the trap. .

The morning after the club was a blur. The kiss, the music, the lie it all felt so far away now, as you prepared for your next mission. You could still hear the song in the back of your mind, echoing through the darkest corners of your thoughts.

"I'm ridin' in a getaway car, I was cryin' in a getaway car, I was dyin' in a getaway car..."

You had tried to run, tried to forget, but it never worked. It never worked with Loki. Your feelings for him were still there, tangled and bruised, like the melody that wouldn't stop playing.

The Avengers were getting ready for a dangerous mission. Something urgent, something that could cost lives. Tony sent you in because you were capable, because you could handle it. You didn’t hesitate, though every part of you screamed to be somewhere else. Somewhere far from Loki. Somewhere that wasn’t this.

The mission was a high-stakes operation, and you were deep in enemy territory. The tension was thick, the silence deafening. You navigated the area, making your way toward the objective, but something went wrong.

A trap. A burst of magic. The air crackled around you, and before you could react, the blast hit you.

The pain was immediate, sharp, like every nerve in your body was on fire. You stumbled, falling to your knees, your breath coming in ragged gasps. Blood poured from a wound on your side, soaking your clothes, and you couldn’t stop it.

"It was the great escape, the prison break, The light of freedom on my face."

But you weren’t escaping anymore. You were dying the taste of metal in your mouth, your body weakening with every passing second.

You didn’t call for help. You couldn’t. Not when Loki might be there. Not when you were so fragile, so mortal. You couldn't bear to let him see you like this. The idea of him seeing you bleed out of seeing you so weak was too much.

You fought to stay conscious, even as your vision blurred. You tried to call for help, but you couldn't get a word out.

“Friday, send the signal,” you managed to choke out. “Alert the Avengers... just in case.”

It was then that you realized how much you wanted Loki, even if he never wanted you back. But you pushed it down, swallowed the ache, because in that moment, you couldn’t be weak.

Back at the Tower

Tony was working at the desk, surrounded by screens when he noticed the signal loss. His eyes narrowed.

“Friday, what’s going on with [Y/N]?” Tony asked, his voice sharp with concern.

Friday’s voice crackled through the speakers. “Signal lost, Sir. No communication coming from [Y/N]. The last known coordinates suggest a significant injury.”

“Damn it,” Tony muttered, tapping a few keys. “Pull up the last footage.”

Back to You

You were bleeding out, the edges of your vision going black. You couldn’t see straight anymore, your breath coming in shallow, panicked gasps. Your body felt heavy, every movement like it took everything you had left.

But you knew you needed to leave a message. Even if you couldn’t make it through, you had to let them know you were still fighting. Still breathing.

You pulled out your comms device, and with trembling hands, you started a final message.

"I'm in a getaway car," you whispered, your voice barely audible. "I left you in a motel bar... Put the money in a bag and I stole the keys... That was the last time you ever saw me..."

Tears began to fall again, your breath hitching as you cried, your body betraying you in the worst way possible. This was it. The end of the road.

"It was the great escape, the prison break..."

You started to sing softly, your voice breaking as you clung to the last shred of who you were. You couldn’t think about Loki, couldn’t think about anything other than trying to stay alive, trying to make sure they didn’t think you were gone.

But you knew, in that moment, that you were losing the battle.

The song played on in your mind, each word hitting harder than the last, echoing like a funeral dirge in your ears.

"I’m ridin' in a getaway car, I was cryin' in a getaway car, I was dyin' in a getaway car…"

You coughed, the blood rising in your throat, and the next thing you knew, your vision went black.

Back at the Tower

Tony's voice was frantic. “Friday, get me the footage. Now.”

Friday's mechanical voice responded, “Downloading now, sir.”

The last footage flickered onto the screen, showing you, broken and bruised, the blood staining your clothes. You were still alive when the camera captured your last words.

"Mission accomplished, sir. Goodbye."

The image froze, and then everything went silent. Tony’s face was hard, his eyes unreadable, but you could see the raw edge of panic in the way his hand hovered over the controls.

“Damn it, [Y/N],” Tony cursed under his breath. “We’re not losing you.”

At that moment, Loki appeared, his green cloak swirling behind him. He had been nearby, sensing the disturbance, and as soon as he saw the footage of you, his heart clenched.

“I’m going after her,” he said, his voice dark with determination. His face, normally cold and calculating, showed a rare flicker of something else something raw. Something desperate.

“We’ll go with you,” Thor said, stepping forward. “You’re not alone in this.”

But Loki didn’t wait. He knew what he had to do.

Back to You

You were lying there, cold and alone, your blood pooling around you, your last thoughts on Loki. Maybe it was a mistake. Maybe everything was always a mistake.

Suddenly, you heard it. A voice, distant but familiar, calling your name. The sound of footsteps. Loki was coming for you. He was coming to find you.

But was it too late?

You didn’t know.

maybe..

@summ3rgl0w @mischeveousscamp @rancesababyd0ll @angelkat1013 @tinytroublemaker @bitchy-bi-trash

[mollywog]

What are your thoughts on Possibility of Peeta in Canon feeling guilt over a perception that he forced Katniss into the Star crossed lovers?

Oooo -Thank you for giving me an opportunity to talk about this.

One of Peeta’s main survival tactics is his ability to read people and situations…. And he’s pretty good at it (which probably was helpful to him far before the arena with a volatile mother but that’s maybe more the stuff of HCs so moving on)

With that in mind:

One of the first things Peeta says to Katniss upon her discovering him in the arena is:

"Lean down a minute first," he says. "Need to tell you something." I lean over and put my good ear to his lips, which tickle as he whispers. "Remember, we're madly in love, so it's all right to kiss me anytime you feel like it."

Even in his fevered state, Peeta is aware that this is an act (at least on Katniss’s side)

Later - when he’s trying to convince Katniss not to go to the feast and she claims that she isn’t, he says:

"You're such a bad liar, Katniss. I don't know how you've survived this long." He begins to mimic me. "I knew that goat would be a little gold mine. You're a little cooler though. Of course, I'm not going." He shakes his head. "Never gamble at cards. You'll lose your last coin," he says.

‘I knew that goat would be a little gold mine. You're a little cooler though. Of course, I'm not going.’ -> all moments he (accurately) clocked where Katniss wasn’t being 100% honest if not outright lying

The ‘I don’t know how you’ve survived this long’ part is particularly interesting to me but I digress.

So then fast forward to after the feast where Katniss risked her life to save him:

"No! Just don't, Katniss!" His grip tightens, hurting my hand, and there's real anger in his voice. "Don't die for me. You won't be doing me any favors. All right?"

I'm startled by his intensity but recognize an excellent opportunity for getting food, so I try to keep up. "Maybe I did it for myself, Peeta, did you ever think of that? Maybe you aren't the only one who ... who worries about ... what it would be like if ..."

I fumble. I'm not as smooth with words as Peeta. And while I was talking, the idea of actually losing Peeta hit me again and I realized how much I don't want him to die. And it's not about the sponsors. And it's not about what will happen back home. And it's not just that I don't want to be alone. It's him. I do not want to lose the boy with the bread

"If what, Katniss?" he says softly.

I wish I could pull the shutters closed, blocking out this moment from the prying eyes of Panem. Even if it means losing food. Whatever I'm feeling, it's no one's business but mine.

"That's exactly the kind of topic Haymitch told me to steer clear of," I say evasively, although Haymitch never said anything of the kind. In fact, he's probably cursing me out right now for dropping the ball during such an emotionally charged moment. But Peeta somehow catches it.

"Then I'll just have to fill in the blanks myself," he says, and moves in to me.

In this moment Katniss inwardly acknowledges that she has real feeling beyond the act and Peeta, again, reads those feelings correctly.

This is the turning point for him.

So, then imagine his surprise on the train tracks (and all the self doubt):

"It was all for the Games," Peeta says. "How you acted."

"Not all of it," I say, tightly holding on to my flowers.

"Then how much? No, forget that. I guess the real question is what's going to be left when we get home?" he says.

(Just picture Peeta replaying the games in his head and trying to figure out where he missed the tell.)

We often joke about Peeta being oblivious to Katniss’s feelings for him in Catching Fire, but really: He’s been burned by ‘misinterpreting’ her before and he’s trying not to make the same ‘mistake’ again.

In a way

“You love me. Real or not real?

Is a remnant of that doubt.

Anyways - back you your original question:

There wasn't a single person in Panem expecting the Gamemakers to allow for two winners prior to the rule change... 73 years of one Victor: It's unprecedented.

The star-crossed lovers strategy, under normal game circumstances,

Benefits them both. The romance makes them both fan favorites to sponsors. But, at the end of the day, there can only be one Victor. So when one were to die, public sympathy would swing sponsors towards the broken hearted other.

Relied very little on Katniss; she didn't have to opportunity to state her feelings for Peeta to the audience after the interview and in the arena, up until the rule change, she barely saw him. Had he died before the (unprecedented) rule change, there wouldn’t be much for her to do but appear sad. The star-crossed lover but is eventually just a sound bite.

No one could have predicted that both Katniss and Peeta would be crowned victors and have to maintain the strategy indefinitely.

So yes, on top of believing he mistook Katniss’s feelings for him in the arena, he then discovered they’d have to maintain the pretense of lovers for the rest of their lives… I’m sure he felt all sorts of miserable ways about that.

[winksasleeplesseye]

SUMMARY: Leon drifts deeper into a dream of perfect moments, struggling to separate longing from reality as everything he feels is watched closely.

PAIRING: Leon Kennedy x F!Reader

WARNINGS: angst, intense emotions, dub con/noncon voyeurism

[MASTERLIST][PREVIOUS][NEXT]

Leon drifted off, just like he had been every other night for the past few weeks. The hazy realm between sleep and awake beckoned to him so easily. He barely put up much of a fight rather letting it guide him than him actually protesting sleep.

No longer when he reached for the other side of the bed did he find a bitter cold. He found the warmth of your hand in his, fingers steady and pressure just the same. His heart raced, rhythm too fast, too sharp, like a drum out of sync with reality. Kind of like the one he just abandoned for this.

But nothing compared to this. Nothing.

Leon knew his heart was a place filled with regrets and unrelenting, unfulfilled desires. Not to mention, the now ever-present sharp, aching hole where you should've been. Every time he woke up he tried to convince himself to stop this, stop chasing ghosts…yet, here he was, every night. Every touch, every word shared with you felt like a desperate echo of what he couldn't have. What he couldn't reach in his waking life.

He'd tried to capture it. A way to cope with what he was experiencing in his head but more tangible, something he could touch. They were small, fleeting distractions. Women who vaguely resembled you in some way—-maybe their eyes, the curve of their lips, or the warmth of their skin. But it never compared. Didn't feel like enough. But for a brief,—very, very brief moment, it made this newfound ache that sat like a rock in his chest go away. It made the visions of you, the dreams, the memories—whatever they were…go away so he could breathe again.

It made him feel like himself before all this, the man who learned to hide it all, push his feelings aside and put on the mask of a man who was okay on the surface. But who was he kidding? This is exactly what it is. A game. A distraction.

They didn't matter. Because they weren't you.

Nameless, faceless women with empty words and empty touches.

He stared blankly to the ceiling as he sat at the kitchen table, a bottle of whiskey half-empty beside him. A lovely habit he picked up during training. It only granted him temporary respite. A harsh, flicking neon light casts a dull, sickly glow on the room. His eyes wandered down to the glass in front of him, maybe if he stared into the bottom of it hard enough, he'd find something there.

Some of the previous nights, where he didn't want to fall victim to the hold of sleep so quickly lingered in his mind. Nights he'd wish he could forget, the faint touches of skin, laughter in his ears. None of them you. They were someone else.

His mind had wandered, back to you—the vivid, soul-piercing moments that felt more real than anything in his real life. The way you'd touched him, your hands soft as they ran through his hair, the gentle way you kissed him. Everything about you had been seared into him like a brand, burning him with its intensity that left him wanting more.

But it's not real. He knew it. He knew she wasn't real.

Leon shook his head, a frustration building in him that threatened to drive him to the brink of insanity. The solace of temporary pleasure only made him more desperate, left him hollow.

"What the fuck am I doing?" He muttered to himself, pacing around the dimly lit kitchen.

He should find you…the real you. He knew it was stupid to even think the government would let him do that. It was hard enough to see Sherry, what made him think they'd let him see you? Fear and uncertainty plagued him at every point—haunting thoughts that'd he already lost you—-kept him from taking that step.

So, here he was. Chasing a ghost, a vision, an illusion….a memory.

Leon closed his eyes, lulled by the sound of the TV to sleep. This time, it wasn't to forget, but to remember. He replayed the dream—the way you looked at him, held him, kissed him as though nothing else mattered. He longed for that pathetically. He longed for you desperately.

"I’m here,” you whispered, your voice softer now, like the wind itself was stealing your words.

His grip tightened, desperation welling in his chest. “Don’t go.”

Your face blurred. His pulse slowed, the warmth of your hand grew cold. He blinked, but the image of you faded, dissolving into a swirl of colors. A buzzing sound filled the space where your laughter had been.

In a sterile room far from where he sat sleeping, a monitor beeped in rhythm with Leon’s brainwaves.

“NeuroSync is holding,” a voice said calmly, devoid of emotion. A shadowed figure leaned closer to the glowing screen, eyes scanning the peaks and troughs of neural signals dancing across the display.

Splashed across different screens, Leon's apartment sat in clear view of the scientists. But the main one that they focused their attention was Leon as he lay in his bed. Every twitch, every breath, everything laid bare for their viewing pleasure. And they weren't just hearing Leon's contentment, they were seeing it.

“Subject Kennedy’s engagement has deepened. Increased attachment to the fabricated stimuli.” Another figure adjusted the feed, altering the algorithm that controlled the dream sequence. “Introduce another stimulus. Let’s push his emotional capacity further.”

A panel lit up, showing the projection of Leon’s subconscious—a simulated reality crafted from fragments of his memories, designed to feel more real than life itself. Each sensation, each longing kiss, meticulously coded.

Medical records, photos, reports all laid out on a nearby table. You, their subject of interest, in every detail of your life all cleanly noted across this table. Alongside Leon's information, no detail left to chance.

How had they managed this? Managed to get the government's top asset wrapped up in this? Oh, they'd hold that close to their chest. They couldn't let anyone else take the credit.

Still, they had to admit….Mr. Kennedy was a fascinating subject.

Most of Umbrella's enemies were just that…enemies. Nameless opposition to their main objective. But soon they became names, faces, people. People like Leon Kennedy. Chris Redfield. Jill Valentine. Many more to count.

Who forced them into the shadows. In hindsight, this was only fair.

Dr. Erickson, Dr. Morales, and an assistant Thompson huddled close together, speaking in hushed tones as their eyes scanned the screens.

"What exactly is the purpose of this? Mr. Kennedy seems to almost be…enjoying the dream presented to him," Dr. Morales pointed out just as Leon, within his dream, pulled you closer to whisper in your ear. His heart rate spiked, brain activity lighting up like a Christmas tree from just a small, intimate act. Quiet moments interlaced with sweet, tender, and increasingly passionate in nature.

"Is that such a bad thing?" Thompson asked, clearly puzzled. "I mean, he’s still vulnerable to the program’s control, right? He’s still part of the experiment. He’s just... well, living in a distorted version of reality." Both the scientists seemed to disregard the assistant's words.

"It's only been a few days and he's—he's fully immersed already. And we haven't even introduced any other aspects to this…dream," Dr. Erickson, the head scientist, explained. His face scrunched in confusion as they stared at the man on their screen. A man completely unaware of anything beyond the realm of this dream. A happy man. For Leon, it was only….you. "Let's get some more info on this Y/N," he instructed.

Leon had become addicted—for lack of a better term. Well, no, that was the best term.

His eyes would glaze over at his desk, the words of his computer screen blurring together to create their own mishmash of words. Yet, he was nothing if not professional with his work.

The waking world had become more dull than he could ever recall it being. Colors muted and lifeless. His mind already seeking ways to disconnect from this world—the missions, the government orders, the endless cycle from disaster to disaster. Despite his best efforts to put on the usual front of nonchalance, he could never escape Hunnigan's watchful eye.

He stood at the coffee machine, hoping a cup of coffee would rouse him back into the paperwork he had left to finish. Still, his mind still gave him brief visions—moments—that kept from completely being tethered to this reality. He saw you in almost crystal clear clarity leaning against the counter, a teasing smile painted on your lips, "You still drink that burnt shit?"

He glanced down at the cup of black coffee, and just before he almost slipped to answer you like you were really there. Hunnigan tapped him on his shoulder.

"Everything good, Kennedy?" She asked, curiosity in her expression. "Looks like you're trying to find all the world's answers in that cup."

Shit. He's more obvious than he thought. Get it together, Kennedy.

Leon gave her a small smile, the corner of his mouth barely moving. "Just tired. The usual."

"The usual?" Hunnigan raised an eyebrow, unimpressed. "The usual for you doesn't usually involve getting coffee at…" she looked at her watch,"…at three in the afternoon. What's bothering you?"

Jesus Christ, he can't hide anything from this woman. Did he want to tell her? Hunnigan had experienced quite the ordeal with him from Spain and he certainly trusted her more than any other handlers in this place. But, still, he didn't have to tell her. This was his cross to bear, so to speak. In many ways, he was a modern man but on this, his old-fashioned father came to mind, "It's impolite to burden people with your problems."

"It's nothing, really. Just had an off night is all," His voice dipped, lower and quieter, hoping that would stop her questioning for now.

Hunnigan nodded in understanding, "Alright, fair enough. I'll let you get back to your coffee then."

Leon watched as she left, a sinking feeling in his gut that this wasn't over. Now all he'd managed to do is pique Hunnigan's never-ending curiosity. Great.

For once, Leon was glad when the work day was over. And even better, the weekend was coming up. Two whole days where no one would give a rat's ass what he'd be doing, except now probably Hunnigan.

He pulled on his jacket, not looking back to his office for even a moment longer than he needed. Tonight, Leon decided to grab some takeout. The cold as he walked to his usual spot was piercing his skin like needles but he pushed through.

Upon entering the diner, he was greeted with mixing scents of stale coffee, grilled onions, and hot grease. A few people sat in the booths, keeping to themselves. A family with their young child, enjoying a plate of fries and shakes. A woman reading a book over some coffee. A couple huddled close together, sharing a meal, shared laughter, shared glances of affection.

Leon could see it all from the booth as he waited for his takeout. For some reason, he couldn't take his eyes away from the couple, the lingering gazes and gentle touches. All so…easy.

For a moment, he saw the both of you instead. Leon huddling close to whisper something in your ear to make you laugh, seeing it so vividly and hearing your laugh—warm, comforting—as you placed your hand in his. It had to be insanity because he could even feel the pressure of your hand in his.

The dinging of the bell took him out of it. His food was ready. He quickly thanked the waitress as he made his way to leave. The couple still completely wrapped up in one another with no idea that Leon had stared so intensely.

A sense of yearning gripped at his chest like a vice.

He entered the same dreary apartment, tossing down his keys and hanging up his jacket. He wasn't too quick to touch the takeout. Instead, he did what he'd been doing the last few nights, watching TV.

His phone lit up, vibrating on the coffee table where it laid.

Chris Redfield.

He ignored it.

Usually, Leon would be happy to go meet Chris for a beer and catch up on how life had been treating them, but right now? Leon didn't want any time away from the sleep he knew was coming, where he could be with you. He knew he should probably at least tell the idiot he's alive but even that was a chore right now.

So, he watched the screen light up one more time before it stopped.

Chris will just have to understand.

In his dream, Leon was once again with you, the two of you sharing a quiet moment in the soft glow of the evening light. Spilling through the curtains in their shared apartment.

An euphoria washed over him, an intoxicating haze that could've lasted forever.

He again watched you as you guided him to cook a new recipe, scents of garlic and fresh herbs hanging in the air as you moved gracefully through the space. He had never been much of a cook before, but with you, it was easy. Your presence made everything feel effortless—your hands guiding his as he chopped vegetables.

Your laughter filled the spaces between their movements.

The soft crackle of an old vinyl played in the background, a tune from the '70s that was vaguely familiar to him. It only added to the atmosphere making it nostalgic and intimate. The melody wrapped around him like a warm hug, a cocoon of warmth and comfort.

You turned to him, eyes filled with mischief. "You sure you can handle this?" You teased, voice playful yet tender.

Leon chuckled, warm and full of affection. "Well, a fire hasn't started yet, so that's always a good sign, right?" He asked, giving you a lopsided grin.

You smiled back, still holding a familiar glint of love and tenderness in your eyes, and for a moment, nothing outside this kitchen existed. Just them, together in this near perfect, domestic bliss.

As you reached over to stir the pot on the stove, Leon couldn't help noticing how your hair fell softly over your shoulder, the way the light coming from above the stove made your skin glow like nothing else. He moved closer, hands running down your arms in a gentle motion. You don't pull away, instead locking eyes with him and still offering that soft smile.

Leon, not wanting a moment like this to pass, took your hand in his, pulling you gently into him. The sensation was intoxicating—a rush, a high that was exhilarating and equal parts comforting. He couldn't help but to breathe you in, the beat of your heart syncing with his.

"Take a break?" He asked, voice barely a whisper.

You raised an eyebrow, still holding that playful twinkle in your eyes. "Now you're just trying to get out of cooking," you teased but you didn't stop him as he led you across the room.

As you both swayed gently, moving in rhythm to the music, the press of you against was enough to make him feel dizzy. The heat of your skin and softness of your breath as you laid your cheek against his chest.

All of his senses for the briefest moment told him this was real…you're real. No longer held back by the world of impossibilities.

He pulled back slightly, looking at you and just savoring you. He had so much he wanted to say but all it was incondite—inadequate and not all encompassing of how he felt. But as always, you'd say the same thing, from your perspective, Leon had never acted so strangely in your shared space.

Your eyes are soft, almost knowing. "You are being so strange, Leon." Your hand rested on his chest, he'd hoped you feel the beat of his heart underneath.

Instead of words, he leaned in, pressing his lips softly against yours. Kiss slow and tender as he tasted you, the sweetness, the warmth. Lost in you.

He pulled away, pressing a brief kiss to your forehead and responded with a chuckle, "I don't care. I don't care if I'm being strange, I just want this. You."

Your fingers traced his jaw, smiling. "Well, lucky for you, you've got the real thing right in front of you," you said with a wink.

The bliss, pure unadulterated bliss of it all was fleeting just as it had been every other day. The truth seeped in quicker than he expected this time. This is not real. She wasn't here. This place wasn't theirs.

Still, Leon held onto it for as long as he could, unwilling to let go of the dream—if only a few more moments despite the edges of reality caving into this one.

[lelengerine]

pairing. chenle x reader

synopsis. the one where chenle wishes he was the reason you’d stay up till three, that he was more than just someone you’d walk by

genre. friends to ?? au (this is very much an open ending), one sided pining, mentions of being intoxicated (just a teensy bit… pls drink responsibly), chenle sits in his thoughts a lot in this, lmk if there’s anything that was missed!

wc. 0.8k words

notes. here's a little something while i write for renjun hehe anw! i love lele's cover for drunk texts by henry moodie like it literally lives in my mind rent free all year round… and to that, collectively we all say thank u lee mujin service 😁😁

m.list

november 5th.

it’s a chilly night. the kind where the air feels electric, and everything is heightened—the sky, the city lights, and the tension sitting heavily between you and chenle.

you’d been walking home together, like you always did after your weekly meetups with friends. the laughter from earlier had faded into a comfortable silence, but there was something about tonight, something in the way the silence stretched, the cool air wrapping around you both, that made chenle’s heart race for reasons he couldn’t name.

he snuck a glance at you, your eyes fixed on the stars, a soft smile playing on your lips. it was then he almost said it—those three words that bore the weight of all his feelings—almost.

the words were right there, tauntingly hanging on the tip of his tongue, heavy and ready to fall out, but then you began to laugh at something in the distance—a couple setting off fireworks, sparks shooting into the sky—and the moment slipped away before he could even get hold of it.

chenle swallowed the words and shoved his hands deeper into his pockets. forget it, he thought, heart sinking further with every second that passed. he wasn’t ready to risk everything. not yet.

“did you see that?” you asked, still staring above, and he can see the colorful bursts in the sky start to dance in your eyes.

a smile instinctively formed on his lips, though his chest ached with everything he couldn’t find the courage to say. “yeah,” he murmured, his voice softer than usual. “breathtaking.”

you assumed he was talking about the fireworks and flashed him a bright grin of agreement, but he was never talking about the fleeting lights in the sky to begin with. 

ʚɞ

april 7th.

five months later, and nothing has changed.

if anything, it’s only gotten worse—this tight feeling in his chest whenever you’re around, the way he finds himself thinking about you at odd hours of the night, replaying every moment in his head. the problem is, you have no idea. you treat him the same as always—like your best friend. like nothing’s different.

and that’s the hardest part.

chenle taps his phone screen again, staring at the half-written text he’s been drafting under your contact for what felt like hours. he’s had a couple drinks earlier in the night with his friends, just enough to loosen the tight grip on his inhibitions, just enough to make him feel bold enough to actually type his feelings out—as incoherent as they were.

his finger hovers over the send button. he knows he should delete it, he knows he’s playing a dangerous game. one wrong move and he could ruin everything—what you have, the friendship that meant more to him than anything else, but the thought to act impulsively for once lingers in his system more than it should.

what if you felt the same way? what if you’ve been waiting for him to say something all this time, too?

chenle shakes his head, cursing under his breath as he deletes the message. he’s not brave enough. not tonight. instead, he flops back on his bed with a faint grunt, phone still in his grip, wondering if you’re thinking about him right now; wondering if you were wide awake, just like him, waiting for a message that will never come despite any plea.

ʚɞ

the days stretch on, and he sees you as often as ever—movie nights, study sessions, spontaneous coffee runs. it wasn’t like he could have avoided you anyways. you were always together, and yet there’s always a gap between you, a line neither of you is willing to cross.

sometimes, when he catches you laughing at one of his dumb jokes or notices the way you glance at him when you think he’s not looking, he wonders if there’s something there. something more than friendship, something you’re both too afraid to say out loud.

but then, just as quickly, the moment fades, and the fear creeps back in.

what if i tell you the truth? what will i lose?

and soon enough, he finds himself under the serene glow of the moon yet again, the clock in his room striking midnight.

chenle stares at his phone, the same familiar ache settling in his chest like an unwelcome guest. his thumb hovers over your name in his contacts. he can’t help but wonder how things would be different if he had confessed all those months ago when he first realized his silly crush, if he hadn’t been so scared of what you might say—or worse, what you wouldn’t say.

the what-ifs were beginning to drive him crazy, and in a moment of reckless frustration, chenle starts typing, not bothering to overthink it this time. he hits send before he can regret it, leaving the consequences for his future self to handle in his stead. his heart pounds in his chest, and the minutes tick by in agonizing silence.

what if i ruined everything?

but then, his phone faintly buzzes, and a message flashes on the screen—one from you. he hesitates before opening it, stomach twisting like a bundle of nerves.

i was waiting for you to say something.

the breath he didn’t realize he was holding escapes in a rush. it wasn’t exactly a confession, not yet, but it’s enough. enough to give him hope.

and maybe—just maybe—he’s not the only one who’s been waiting.

[katelynnwrites]

imgonnagetyouback | laura freigang

warnings: somewhat of a friends with benefits and angst

word count: 367

summary: laura turns up on your doorstep after frankfurt gets knocked out of the dfb pokal semifinals because she doesn't know where else to go

a/n: the sixth installation of my 'the anthology' blurbs series

you wish you could say you were surprised there’s knocking on your door.

one could even say you were expecting it…and the blonde on the other side.

‘what are you doing here laura?’ you whisper, even though you already know.

the blonde’s cheeks are flushed and her eyes rimmed with red, clear evidence of her crying.

‘make me forget. please.’

‘lau no…we said that we won’t do this anymore. that the last time would be the last time. it’s not healthy.’ you try.

she might not be yours anymore but her pain is still your pain.

the striker swallows hard, her blue grey eyes welling with fresh tears as she replays her missed penalty over in her mind.

you know her well enough to realise what she’s doing. you’d watched the game too, frankfurt’s harsh loss of the dfb pokal semifinals being the reason why you anticipated the german woman’s presence in the first place.

‘if i ever meant anything to you, if you ever really loved me, you would give me this. please i-i’m begging.’

you wince, ‘that’s not fair.’

‘i’m not trying to be.’ your former girlfriend murmurs.

there’s a flicker of guilt within her but she pushes it down.

she’s hurt you she knows that and she knows that some part of you must resent her for it.

and it’s true.

you told your friends that you hate her but you love her just the same.

the two of you might have broken all the pieces of your relationship but the german woman still wants to play the game.

such is the hold she's always had over you that you indulge her each and every time. she can take the upper hand and touch your body.

now is no different.

with a quiet sigh, you let her into your apartment. into your bed where she quickly has you moaning her name, in between cries of ‘don’t stop!’

when dawn comes and laura leaves your apartment, the thought crosses her mind, 'i'm gonna get you back.'

it simply isn't necessary on her part because she’s made you think twice. you are beginning to find that despite your mutual break up, you were never not hers.

[ourlittlepoet]

Bloom and Rage Theory

So, I thought of something. I replayed the game for the nth time, and i wanted to see if I could put some things together.

I've always had this feeling that the girls did something terrible, and that's why they had to separate and ditch the camera. why else would swann say "i lost the camera some time that summer"? and why did they say poor dylan? what happened to dylan that would make the girls feel bad for her as adults?

so, my question is: what did the girls do that would lead them to 1) separate and make vows to one another, 2) ditch the camera, and 3) feel bad for dylan?

my theory is this — the girls did something and someone (likely corey) died as a result.

why do i think that? well...

when i played this game, i always ALWAYS waited before making a decision. most times, im rewarded w scenes/dialogue like this:

this was right before the concert. "hiding the evidence" = the truck they stole. but still, it's worth mentioning that the idea's crossed their minds already.

each girl (during the abyss scene) made a wish, and each girl's wish basically came true one way or another.

nora wished to be famous "like, rockstar LEVEL famous", and now she's an influencer.

kat wished to "get out" "get us out" and all of them managed to get out of velvet cove one way or another. ontop of that, she managed to get tickets that would get them out of velvet cove.

autumn didn't make a wish, and coincidentally her throwing the rock was the ONLY time the abyss didnt glow during this part of the game.

then, there's swann, who wished to either be strong or free. ive seen playthroughs of people where swann gives a flower. all four of my playthroughs had swann giving away a bundle of her hair. we have yet to see the longterm results of this, but who knows.

now, keep that in mind okay. the girls made wishes and it all came true.

remember this scene? in the teaser trailer?

right.

we haven't seen this yet.

what if a fire breaks out? what if that fire burns down the ranch, and what if the girls were the ones who started the fire?

and again... what if someone died as a result of it? someone important to dylan, and corey gets blamed for it?

what if someone died, and they have to keep quiet about it?

that being said, what if they DO throw the cam corder in the abyss? what if they do that and swann or somebody in the group (im guessing autumn/nora) accidentally says "i just want us to forget this all happened", and they did? because the abyss granted their wish?

on top of that, kat did mention that corey wants the ranch, and yet if you look at the flyers in the blue spruce, it says "Dylan Mikaelsen Welcomes you!" and not a damn thing about Corey Litchfield. So either he's dead or they break up.

i dont know i this is a working theory, but i have a feeling this might be what happens. we'll see on tape 2, but idk, i feel like it makes proper sense. the only thing im bothered by is the fact that Adult Nora says "someone might be listening" like as if she knows what they did.

what do yall think?

[rainynightmoonlight]

Omg a event that has song reqs?!!🤯🤯 I HAVE THE PERFECT SONG THAT HAS BOTH ANGST AND FLUFF POTENTIAL!!

Fandom: Twisted Wonderland

Characters: Silver Kalim Rook

Type: Normal, Romantic fluff. Not established relationship? Yeah idk about that.

Song: Da Capo from Honkai impact 3rd. Its a game.

I may send in another req with the same song for angst. Cause the potential i tell you.

.·:🎼¨༺ Songs from the heart ༻¨🎼:·. | Da Capo

Characters: Kalim, Rook, Silver

Song: Da Capo from Honkai Impact 3rd

Warnings: None

A/U: Self aware Twisted Wonderland Au

KALIM AL ASIM

Kalim was excited while you were using him to finish up the exams for your weekly missions. He was one of your mains, and it brought so much joy to his already joyful heart. This time however, you were choosing the moves and not autoing the battles. Your attention on him made him so happy. While doing the daily exams, Kalims's ears picked up such a beautiful song playing in the background.

“When good old friends are going away, Will you wish them to remember your name?”

You seemed so somber when listening to the song. As if your heart weighed heavy with something but you still chose to smile. Kalim liked it when you smiled, especially when he was the cause of it. There was something off about that one lyric. There was a certain sadness in your eyes.

Did people forget you? His heart swelled with empathy at the notion that you were forgotten amongst peers within your world. How badly Kalim wished to whisk you away and into Scarabia. All of his dorm mates would treat you with such adoration and not a single soul would go on without remembering your name. You were the creator after all.

Kalim made sure that when the last exam ended, he was the one on the victory screen. He said his coded line but when he asked if the opponent was okay, it was more directed towards you. Your gaze lingered on the victory screen. Kalim urgently answered your question. His words didn't reach you but the sentiment was still there.

“Of course I would! And I'll remember yours too, creator!”

ROOK HUNT

Rook had his usual smile on his face, one that never revealed his true inner feelings. He was the only one in the guest room wandering around. You watched with entertainment while trying to decide what item to craft and add to the concoction of furniture within the room. Rook sat down in one of the plush chairs provided in the guest room humming the tune playing in the background. One lyric caught the hunter's attention, however.

“May you, the beauty of this world always shine.”

Rook's eyes widened at the sudden lyric. Shock flooded through his system but it wasn't evident over the screen. His chibi in the guest room froze on the chair it was sitting on. You recognized his beauty. Shock soon turned into amazement at the notion of what you said.

Rook was often used to being the pervaior of beauty, but having you call out his beauty made him so happy. His lips spread across his face. A smile from cheek to cheek was evident. He hummed in amusement, leaning back in the excellently crafted chair. He wanted to pay you back for the excellent song.

His beauty was mostly for you. He dedicated so much to represent himself the best he could. Even before his transition into Pomefiore. Rook looked at you from the other side with such adoration. His beauty didn't rival yours.

“You're the reason I always shine, creator.”

SILVER

Silver was dozing off, much to his dismay, while you looked at one of his cards. His chibi form was on display while you were looking at one of his cards' stats. He was very grateful that you were paying so much attention to him. Music played in the background as you decided what to level up on the card. It was calming enough to put Silver right to sleep.

“When good old days are passing away Will you promise your heart remains the same?”

Silver immediately awoke with his drowsiness now gone. He looked at your calming features. That one lyric replayed in his mind as if it were meant for him. The song continued to play, but that one lyric swarmed his thoughts. Does he dare answer you?

He so badly wanted to. Even if the question was just a song. Even if he was reading too much into it. Silver could have been dreaming it for all he knew. He didn't care; he wanted to express that he wouldn't ever change. 

At least he wouldn't change much. Silver was overwhelmed with happiness that you liked him so much that you didn't want him to change. He was sure you still would even if he did. After some thinking, Silver made his mind up. His little chibi made eye contact with you once more.

“With you watching over me, I can promise I won't ever change.”

Do not repost or translate without my explicit permission! Reblogs are welcome!

[blckbrrybasket]

Say 1,000 words, moan 1,000 more

ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢꜱ: gender neutral reader, voice kink, teasing, anal (r receiving), mild hurt/comfort, aftercare, Gaz and the reader argue but it’s mainly pent up horniness, brief mention of Gaz being the reader’s sergeant

ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ: 2.7k

ɴᴏᴛᴇ: somehow I completely forgot I wrote this a while ago whoops

It had never been an issue until Gaz bent down once to whisper in your ear, his hand resting on the small of your back. His warmth easily seeped through every layer of your clothes and you couldn’t help wishing it was his calloused hand sliding against your bare skin. The thoughts couldn’t fully flesh out before you realized what he had asked. Thankfully Gaz hadn’t seemed to notice the way your eyes darted away…or the subtle squeeze of your thighs. Up until then you could cover up the attraction to his voice, until he noticed.

Unfortunately (or fortunately) for you Gaz had noticed the change in your demeanor. He wasn’t entirely sure what did it though, so next time he was around you he slid his palm onto your back again. Under his watchful eye you shifted, but didn’t have the same reaction as before. Gaz tried to wrack his brain to figure out what it was. He replayed the moment over again in his head. Suddenly the realization dawned on him, the whisper. His whisper.

It would be too obvious to test it immediately so your interactions played by normally until you two were walking behind everyone in the hall. “Whaddya figure we’re havin’ for lunch?” Gaz’s voice came from nowhere, his breath fanning across your neck. Your body went rigid quickly to Gaz’s enjoyment. “You okay?” “Uh yeah yeah.” You cleared your throat and forced a step forward. Gaz watched you speed up with a triumphant smirk. He had you now.

From then on it only became more apparent what his game was. The moment people were looking away he’d find any reason to mutter something into your ear. Sometimes it was meaningful, most the time is was something stupid while his voice teetered on being a grumble. It began to snowball when he thought people were being too close to you and he began draping himself over you and whispering to you in front of them. They got the message.

All of it came to a head though on a mission when he had yanked you behind a crate and growled at you to stay low. His lips being too close to your ear to be professional had become second nature at that point. In the culmination of his antics and this finally being when he first fully rumbled into your ear you glared at him. “Shut up!” You hissed quietly, arousal building in your veins. Not now, this wasn’t the right time.

“What?” Gaz’s voice cut through the tense air, steely and steady. Your heart dropped to your feet at the sound. He leaned forward, forcing you to slide down to accommodate him. “I think you forget who’s in charge, yeah?” A snap shattered the atmosphere and as soon as it started it was over. Gaz darted up, shooting at the less than hidden targets. Not a single miss. Instantly he walked around the crate, stalking off somewhere else. You needed to learn, but not here in danger. The frustration built back up within you, unaware of the path Gaz was shooting to be free for you. Even if he was pissed he wouldn’t let you get hurt.

Walking off the tarmac to an empty room after a shitty mission was always the worst. This time the absence of Gaz clinging to you caused you to walk away faster. The moment you reached your room you slammed the door shut behind you. Closing your eyes, you turned to press your forehead to the cool door. A beat or two passed before you pressed off and stripped your shirt off, your back to the room.

“Already stripping for me? Didn’t know you were a slag.” Shit. Gaz had a wolfish grin when you whirled around to face him. His head was tilted to the side while his eyes scanned you. “Nothing to say now?” “How’d you get in here? The barracks shouldn’t be open to just anybody.” You countered. Gaz let the attitude slide for now. “Not why? Thought that’d be interesting.” Gaz nonchalantly leaned back on his hands like he hadn’t broken into your room.

“Pretty sure you could get in trouble for this.” He clicked his tongue and looked at you darkly. “Pretty sure you wouldn’t do that to me love. Nah, I think ya like me to much.” There was no refusal on your end. It would be pointless to lie. “I’ll answer anyways,” Gaz continued. “I’m here to teach you that lesson.” He smoothed your sheets before getting up to circle you, zeroing in. “If you don’t want it tell me. Tell me and I’ll leave right now.” Gaz whispered into your ear.

A shiver ran down your spine at the faint contact of his lips on the shell of your ear. “Please…” His smirk returned. “Please what?” “Please fuck me.” You swore you could feel the shudder of satisfaction from his chest. His hand moved to grip your ass, the muscle spilling between his fingers, blocked by the fabric of your uniform.

Gaz kept his grip on you, walking you forward till your knees hit the bed, threatening to bend and tip you over onto it. “Can you handle it?” He taunted. “Gaz,“ “Kyle.” A weight settled on your shoulder and you realized one of his hands moved to hold onto you. All of your thoughts left at his offered name.

“Kyle…” You breathed out. It was all you could really do. “Yes?” Amusement laced his sultry tone, “Are you done?” You bit back hollowly, “Fuck off.” A real chuckle escaped his lips, the lips that grazed the nape of your neck. “I’d much rather fuck you.” His hands still holding your ass and shoulder gave him the perfect grip to grind into your ass.

The feeling of his hard on under his pants pressed into you. Gaz squeezed his fingers on your shoulder before moving his hand to tug on your hair, pulling your head back. He was always confusing with you, except for now. Now, his intentions were crystal clear. “You thought you were so funny huh?” Gaz could handle what happened earlier and get over it, but with you he wanted to show you that he was the only one you needed. So he’d show you what happens when you talk to him like that.

Gaz’s lips crashed yours together at a slightly awkward angle. It was sloppy, but exactly what he wanted. Teeth clashed while spit swapped and your lips quickly became soaked and swollen. Gaz licked up into your mouth feeling your tongue tremble when it hit his. The feeling had him smirking against your mouth, moving his tongue to slide along yours, drawing a moan from your throat. A groan that rivaled yours came from his own mouth.

Panting, Gaz came up for air. His hand still held onto your hair keeping you against his swelling lips. “Gotta teach you a fucking lesson.” Gaz’s hips ground into your ass again. “Fuckin’ hell,” he grunted into your ear, losing the battle of holding himself together.

“Yes. Fuck yes.” You begged unabashedly. Shame was nowhere near to being in your thoughts. Your hips rolled back into his and Gaz sucked a breath in. His bottom lip was sucked under his teeth, biting down on it. “Keep fuckin’ teasing me.” Gaz huffed and removed his hands from you. Your needy whine didn’t miss his ears but he quickly pushed his pants down anyways. “Can’t fuckin’ wait anymore. Waited so long.”

He pressed his body against yours, feeling the warmth radiate between you, his dick nestling between your cheeks. His hand slid down to grip your ass, giving it a firm squeeze, before he tugged you closer. Gaz thumbed at your waistband, letting it snap back with a grin. At your gasp he feigned remorse. “Oh I’m sorry love, I’ll make it up to you.” His body guided you to bend over and he slid his hands under your waistband.

Gaz didn’t hesitate anymore, turning his hands over and slowly sliding your fatigues off your hips. It seemed his limited patience only extended to him revealing you like a precious gift. He stepped back, distracted by the sight of your ass in front of him he blurted out, “Lube. Where’s-“ You cut him off hastily, “Dresser, first drawer to the left.”

Gaz momentarily pulled off of you to rummage through your drawer. He was hasty, a man on a mission and grabbed the bottle quickly. Gaz made his way back immediately and popped open the top. “Gotta loosen you up.” He muttered and smeared lube on his fingers before leaning in and whispering in your ear. “Have to make sure you can handle my cock.”

Gaz coated himself with the lube that was smeared on his fingers. “I can handle it,” you protested quickly. “Oh can you?” He responded casually. He pumped his hand up and down slowly, making sure to thoroughly cover his cock. When he was done Gaz kept the lube soaking his fingers to help him circle the rim of your asshole. He pressed his thumb in gently and watched the pad of it disappear into you while you moaned.

A breath he didn’t know he had been holding escaped and he bit his lip. Gaz immediately wanted to pound into you but instead he let his thumb hang heavy, pushing his index finger in, to the knuckle with no resistance. Your low moan only fuel the raging fire in his gut. “That feel good?” Gaz egged you on with a smirk.

He looked down at his finger easily reaching deep inside of you before he pulled it back out. A second later two slick fingers penetrated again. Gaz took his time, curling them to scissoring them until he could slide in a third finger. He hummed appreciatively in the back of his throat. It was torturously slow and clearly a punishment for your outburst earlier.

“Gaz I swear-“ Once again you were cut off with a firm reminder. “I said call me Kyle.” You swallowed thickly and opened your mouth. Gaz thrust his fingers in harshly causing you to cut yourself off with a moan. “What was that?” He challenged.

Your mouth hung open, eyes squeezed shut from the pleasure. “Kyle please just fuck me already.” In an instant his fingers were gone making you slump against the bed, ass up for him. “Do you think you deserve it?” You heard his grumble over a rustling. “I’ve been good!” You retorted in a less than steady voice.

“I guess you have.” Gaz tutted. He looked down at what he had been doing. His precum had steadily leaked down and dropped onto his thigh from where his dick hung against it. Gaz scooped it up and smeared it back onto his dick before letting out a fake sigh. “We don’t have enough lube..”

“What? Yes I do!” You knew he was fucking with you but you didn’t know what he was aiming for. “Haven’t even fucked you and you’re already gone. So needy.” You supposed now that he was only messing around to use your reaction against. However, he wasn’t entirely cruel.

Gaz shuffled forward to grip the tops of your thighs, his thumbs coming up to spread your ass. “You ready?” He leaned to the side to see your dazed expression. “Mm yeah.” Gaz smiled at your response and slowly pressed in. His fat tip breached your entrance and he paused when it made a small ‘pop’, resting in it’s new home. He slowly pressed forward inch by inch listening intently to the moans spilling from your lips.

His throat bobbed when he groaned at your sounds. “You sound so fuckin’ good, feel so fuckin’ good.” Gaz watched your tight asshole take him to the base where he bottomed out. He held one arm under your waist, the other grabbing onto your hip. Your face scrunched up at the stretch but slowly relaxed when you adjusted to the intrusion.

A whine bubbled in your throat when he experimentally rolled his hips. “Yeah, you’ll take it well, darling.” He murmured mainly to himself. “Won’t you?” Gaz’s voice instantly switched to a sweet tone contrasting his previous timbre. He pulled out until the head of his cock was the only thing in your asshole, pausing then thrusting back in. “Yeah you’ll do nicely.”

You eagerly nodded your head at his husky words. Who wouldn’t do good for him? Gaz chewed his bottom lip in concentration building up to a steady rhythm. He slammed his hips back and forth, angling it differently little by little until he hit the spot that had you keening. “You want me, don't ya, love? You're fucking begging for it.” Gaz's voice was thick with desire. He merely laughed when you looked back with a cock drunk expression.

“Don’t worry I know darling, I know.” Gaz reached up from your hip to cradle your cheek. “Feels good don’t it? Being fucked on your Sergeant’s cock?” “Mhm!” The way you responded could barely be classified as a response, but he understood all the same. Your velvety walls welcomed every punishing thrusts that hit deep within you.

Gaz could hardly keep still as he trailed his hand to your shoulder and gripped it for purchase before speeding up. His dark eyes watched the ripple of your ass every time his hips slammed into you. The tip of his tongue stuck out of the corner of his mouth, focused on slamming into you over and over and over.

It wasn’t long before you were choking on air and grasping at the sheets, complete bent over the bed now. “‘M gonna-!” Gaz chuckled triumphantly and continued at his brutal pace. “Yeah yeah, you gonna come for me? Do it.” The encouragement was all you needed for you go cum, dripping onto your sheets. Gaz didn’t stop pounding into you while you came, wanting to prolong your orgasm.

A pornographic moan ripped itself from your mouth while you arched your back into the bed. “Yes yes yes! Kyle!” Your eyes rolled back, drooling onto the ruined covers, ropes of his come filling you up. Gaz leaned over you, only slowing down once he worked himself through his high.

He ducked his head into the crook of your neck and fought to catch his breath. Gaz sighed wistfully and pressed a chaste kiss there. “Perfect.” You whined and he looked up to see you looking at him. A smile parted his lips, “You were everything and more.” He studied your blissful expression and swiped a drop of sweat off your forehead with his thumb. You began to sit up when he gently guided you to stay still. “‘S okay, you don’t gotta do anything.”

Gaz pulled out slowly, not wanting to hurt you. His hands massaged the globes of your ass soothingly before he stood up fully to tuck himself back into his fatigues. Gaz helped you turn over, walking to your dresser to grab a rag. He came back to discover you staring at the ceiling and he smiled. “Anything interesting up there?” Gaz craned his neck. When he didn’t respond he laughed and began tenderly cleaning you up.

“Kyle..?” Gaz raised his eyebrows and looked down at you, not expecting you to speak up. “Yeah love?” Your nervous expression easily made him worried and he sat on the edge of the bed, reaching out to cup your jaw. “Can this happen again? Or is it a one time thing?” Gaz sighed in relief at your question and leaned forward. “We’ll do it as many times as you want.”

At your satisfied smiled he pecked your lips. “Now get some rest, I’ll wash your blankets later.” He grabbed the soiled blankets and tossed it to the side, letting you slide under the covers with him copying your movements.

Gaz rolled onto his side to see your peaceful expression, on the brink of sleep. The smile on his face was incapable of faltering when this was his view. He exhaled quietly and pulled your head to rest on his chest while he fluttered his eyes shut. No, it wouldn’t be a one time thing.

[dreamsy990]

so, re:chain of memories, huh?

warning! its been a little while since i played through recom, so the game isnt as fresh in my mind as some others. sorry for any innacuracies!

spoiler alert, this is my second favorite kingdom hearts game. at least of the ones i've played so far. i get that this isn't like. a POPULAR opinion but fuck you i have almost nothing but positives to say about it.

let's start with the easy stuff first. recom introduced a new card-based combat system. i cant compare it to the gba version, since i didn't play that, but i can say that for what its worth i DID enjoy the combat. recom is by far the hardest game so far (at least for me) and almost every boss took multiple days for me to beat, even with my hp maxed out. it took me a while to get the combat system, but id honestly love to replay the game now that i have a better understanding of how it works. the card system requires a lot of quick thinking and i get that it isnt everyones taste but its CERTAINLY mine. every fight is difficult and feels genuinely rewarding when you win. the movement, like kh1, can use a lot of work, but i wouldnt call it terrible. just kinda sluggish. i think my favorite boss fight was larxene. shes a pain in the ass but i love her.

i think riku's side dropping the deck building mechanic isnt terrible, but i wish i could reorder his deck at the very least. and the lack of healing cards is. not fun. basically any damage you take is permanent unless you HAPPEN to get mickey and its simply Not a fun time. im not very good at games okay.

i have a lot less to say about the worlds than the combat. they're definitely the worst aspect of the game, though. the idea of making worlds with cards is fine! it just leads to kind of repetitive world design. the stories are forgettable, so forgettable that i literally forgot them. and i could make a point about how thats the idea its a game all about forgetting things!! but honestly that just making excuses for it. the worlds couldve kept the idea of forgetting things without literally making them forgettable. i say this about every world, except for one. because DESTINY ISLANDS

destiny islands is just. so fucking good in recom. its the climax of both sora and rikus stories and i think theyre both amazing. id have to say i prefer rikus, soley because of the visual storytelling you get from his side of it, and thats not to say soras is bad at all. but something about zexion telling riku that its his fault his home was destroyed, as riku sees a version of himself turning into a literal monster? thats just good okay. its really good.

i ADORE the characters in this game too. everything we get from them is sooo good. it's the introduction to the organization and all of them (except lexaeus who did literally nothing) are a treat. axels my favorite ofc, but larxene is such a fun villain, you love to hate her. shes really the star of the org cast in this game. sure, axels may have said its his show now, but larxene stole the spotlight.

its namines introduction, too, and i love her. on one hand, shes just really kind. she wants a friend, she wants someone to talk to, she wants to meet sora. on the other, shes just a little bit fucked up actually. sure, shes honest with sora, but shes the tiniest little bit guilt trippy and i LOVE THAT. her response to sora saying he wants to get back his own memories and forget her is "oh okay. you want to remember your REAL friends, huh? theyre the ones who REALLY matter to you? yeah anyone would want that. no friends for namine i guess." like shes just a bit salty and we love that for her. i want slightly guilt tripping and salty namine back nomura.

but ofc one of my favorite new characters in this game HAS to be repliku. god i ADORE repliku. his hatred for riku is sooo fun and the way he fights with sora is great too. like in soras side i thought he was a neat villain but rikus side? hes amazing omfg. one of the only villains i liked in rikus story (sorry lexaeus, you werent good until days)

over all, this game certainly isnt everyones cup of tea, but its DEFINITELY mine. it's the game im most excited to replay at some point, mostly because of the amazing boss fights. 9/10. its got issues, but the story and characters are so good that i genuinely could not care less about like. most of them.

[girlsnap2025]

SCRIPT FOR PINE POINT RADIO PLAY (P1)

(Nil bikes through town as the TOWNSFOLK whisper about him.) 

TOWNSFOLK: “There goes that kid who sleeps in the woods again. What a freak.”  

(As the bike continues to peddle, static noises start playing as Nil’s insomiacated mind. But as he turns his head, implied for the radio play, the noises stop, and only the summer breeze is heard. So, the biking continues until it stops at “MARCO’S FRESH PIZZA”.) 

SCENE 1 

(Alternative music is heard as NIL enters the kitchen of “MARCO’S FRESH PIZZA”, and NIL yawns.) 

DIMITRI: “Woah, did you carry your groceries with those eyebags?” 

NIL: (Sighs) “I’m gonna kill you.” 

DIMITRI: (Chuckles as he speaks in the first sentence.) “Not if I kill you first. I know where they keep the industrial strength bleach.” 

NIL: “I’ll lock you in the meat freezer.” 

DIMITRI: “Joke’s on you, the freezer lock’s broken. I jammed it on my first day and they never fixed it.” 

NIL: (Mutters) “Damnnit.” 

DIMITRI: “10am’s too early for murder, anyway.” 

(MARCO then comes in, standing by the door.) 

MARCO: “But not too early for prep work! Dimitri, teach Nil the sauce station today, will ya?” 

DIMITRI: “Sure thing, boss!” 

(DIMITRI says this as MARCO steps out, the door closing behind him.) 

DIMITRI: “Okay, so Marco also said you make the thin crust pizzas too thick, and the thick crust pizzas too thin, so I gotta run you through everything again, on top of teaching you the sauce station. Oh, and they’re adding some new gimmicky summertime promo, so we gotta learn how to make that monstrosity, too.” 

(NIL yawns a bit again and rubs his eyes. DIMITRI turns around and leans against the cold pizza stove.) 

DIMITRI: (Teasing) “Snoozing on your second day? Tsk, tsk. Did you stay up watching the rerun of ‘Snail Man and Slime Frog’, too?” 

NIL: (Somewhat mumbles) “Shit like that’s never as good as you remember.” 

DIMITRI: “Hey, y’know what they say. Nostalgia's a hell of a drug, and I’m jonesing. They played the episode where Snail Man was dying because he couldn’t make enough slime, so Slime Frog had to give him a slime transplant.” 

NIL: “How could I forget the greatest television line ever written: (Mocking Slime Frog voice) ‘it’s slime time.’” 

DIMITRI: (Mocking Snail Man voice) “He’s not just a slime frog, he’s also-” 

NIL: (Mocking Snail Man voice) “My slime friend.” 

DIMITRI: “Hey, shitty writing or not, that shit had us kids in a fuckin’ chokehold. Remember when we dressed up as them for Halloween? My mom still has the photos.” 

NIL: “I wish I could forget.” 

DIMITRI: “Your head was so big we had to cut the costume so you could fit through the hole. Hm. Seems things hasn’t really changed.” 

NIL: “Hey, y’know what they say about big heads.” 

(MARCO then enters once more.) 

MARCO: “I’d love to pay you two to reminisce, but I pay you to make pizzas, okay?” 

DIMITRI: “What were you like as a kid, Marco?” 

MARCO: “Oh, got into all sorts of trouble. Stay in school, kids, or else you’ll end up like me.” 

DIMITRI: “What, bald and divorced?”

MARCO: “Pfft, ha! Shuddup, kid.” 

(DIMITRI chuckles as they soon get to work.) 

~

(The only reason I copy and pasted the actual script from the game is because so the actors wouldn't have to replay the game just to record dialouge lol. Saving some time. Dialouge belongs to @zeddyzi)

When recording dialouge, just turn all the recordings into a video and send it a community called "Pine Point Radio Play Project", which I'll create. I'll take care of editing and sound effects :3

@imcynthiali @highclasshomosexual @skippsmandolin

[rosewood-multifandom-writer]

What your favorite Devil May Cry game says about you:

Big Disclaimer: These are mostly jokes/assumptions mixed with what I have seen. Take everything I say with a grain of salt. I’m not counting any of the anime since this is mainly focused on the games. I’m also excluding crossovers like Marvel vs Capcom.

Devil May Cry 1: You are one and/or three of these things: You are an older fan who has been a lover of the series since this game’s 2001 debut. You may also be a Resident Evil fan, considering that the beta version of RE4 would eventually be the reason Devil May Cry exists. Finally, you may also be one of the more quiet or chill fans. I will also assume that you were one of the more old school PS2 players that have done some sick combos. And you’re a Limp Bizkit fan who was blown away by the Netflix Devil May Cry intro. You also love to look back fondly at this game alongside RE4 with nostalgia.

Devil May Cry 2: First of all, you are a rare fan that has not said that DMC2 sucks. But secondly, you’re probably one of the very few Lucia fans that think that she deserves WAY better. I will go as far as say, even though DMC2 is not my favorite DMC game that I tapped out from, I love Lucia’s character and her design, and if DMC2 is your favorite DMC game, you might agree with me on that. You may or may not have been one of the few people that talks about how different and even edgy Dante acts in this game, but in a good way. Or you probably made the theory that DMC2 Dante could be Vergil. Even though I don’t think that would be possible due to the fact that Dante’s Devil Trigger is still Dante and he still uses his guns, but I digress.

Devil May Cry 3: Be honest. The cover art of the Devil May Cry 3 case made you simp for Dante. Not only that, but this was also the game that turned you into a Vergil simp. You also maybe felt great POWER playing as Vergil once you unlocked him. I will also assume you were one of the few people that decided to actually play the game in the expected order (DMC3, DMC1, DMC2, DMC4 and DMC5). In the game DMC5, you already knew what the plot twist whenever you played as V.

Devil May Cry 4: Despite the game being unfinished, you still enjoyed playing the game and you came out of this game a Nero fan. You were excited to play as Lady for the first time and wish she was playable again in Devil May Cry 5. You’re also very curious as to who Nero’s mother could be. You are also probably one of the many artists/writers who made their own take on who the Lady in Red could be. Oh and before I forget, you also want the “Nero is a deadweight” joke to stop because it wasn’t funny the first time, and it’s not funny for the 16536th time. Like the DMC3 fans, you also already knew what the twist with V was in DMC5.

Devil May Cry 5: There is a chance that you have played Metal Gear Rising and jammed out to Devil Trigger and Bury the Light. You’re also one of the many fans that is also tired of the “Nero is a deadweight joke” and your eye probably twitched whenever Dante says that line at the beginning when you replay the game. Also, chances are, new fans have played THIS game before playing the previous games. Myself included. I promise to finish one of the previous ones. The chance is made higher with the recent Netflix Anime where newer fans will go to this game specifically.

DMC Devil May Cry (DMC Reboot): You will defend this game with your whole chest. You’re also tired to seeing the same negative comments about DMC reboot whenever you go on here or anywhere else. You may also prefer the aesthetics of this game over the original. Despite all this toxic negativity towards the reboot, you are the chillest fan in Devil May Cry’s fandom. You are also civil in your conversations and arguments when it comes to discourse about the Reboot and do not resort to name-calling or any childish tactics most toxic fans would do, like some of the loudest DMC Reboot haters. You’re kind of like that misunderstood edgy kid in school people like to resort playground insults if you say an opinion they don’t like or express yourself however YOU like.

Devil May Cry Peak of Combat: You’re the average Gacha player who was devastated that this game got shut down, before moving on to another Gacha game for it to suck the money out of your wallet. That’s all I got, lol.

[angellekookie]

Get To Know Your Mutuals

Thanks for the tag Massi 《 @livingformintyoongi 》 I'm gonna answer as much of this as I can (and see if we can beat the destiny allegations 👀) (This is my 4th!! time doing this. Tumblr.com has been fighting me with this 😭)

what's the origin of your blog title? The truth is I'm terrible at usernames and I wanted something really cool and I blanked out and said angelwings- which was absolutely taken so I had to choose random combos until... well here we are <3

favorite fandoms: Armys, Stays, Carats, Swifties.

OTP(s)/shipname: Maybe Chlonath. When I first made this blog they were my first ship so I'm kinda sentimental about it lol

favorite color: Warning for any of the 'favourite items' questions. I hate choosing just one thing 😅 but I love blue and pink- and also latley, i've been loving pastels and muted shades.

favorite game: I've played the pokemon games so many times, replayed them so much... I think it would only be fair to say those.

song stuck in your head: Autumn Leaves - BTS (to be fair, this song is always in my head and I'm never normal about it), Python - GOT7, Cornelia Street🌝 and Say Don’t Go - Taylor Swift

weirdest habit/trait? So I don't find it weird, but my friends say it's so strange that i literally can't concentrate if I have dry hands. They say it's weird to moisturize so much

hobbies: Reading, writing, plus doing my own nails (this in particular brings me so much joy 😊), and I also really enjoy making a meal from scratch

if you work, what's your profession? customer service.

if you could have any job you wish what would it be? I wanted to be an astronaut for the longest time growing up. I really adore the sky.

something you're good at: I'm gonna go ahead and say cooking and my nails here again- I've been doing them both for so long 😊

something you're bad at: Confrontation? Bro I will run

something you love: The six letters Cardan wrote for Jude in the Folk of the Air Series (I can go into serious detail and I will.)

something you could talk about for hours off the cuff: Actually don't try me I'm a yapper.

something you hate: AVOCADO... I even tried it again as an adult... never again :,)

something you collect: I can't think of anything that I collect right now as we speak. But I would like to collect the BTS albums (I have 2 solo albums that i was gifted and they are my babies)

something you forget: That I don't have to handle everything on my own.

what's your love language? Words of affirmation, quality time and acts of service in this order.

favorite movie/show: So any spiderman movie will have a special place in my heart always. Also Peter Pan (2003). As for shows... well I've watched the kdrama One Spring Night more times than I can count. I recommend it 10000% btw

favorite food: I'll be honest... as long as the food tastes, good I will eat

favorite animal: Empire Penguins, dogs, PANDAS, other bears (if it was safe to hug a bear I would tbh)

are you musical? I mean think, maybe?

what were you like as a child? I've been told I was quited but "had a penchant for the dramatic at the most random times." (personally, i think this still checks out tbh)

favorite subject at school? All the sciences. Biology, chemistry, physics (my love- please don't ask me why I love this subject and consistently failed math) and geography.

least favorite subject? Math and History

what's your best character trait? I've been told i have a good sense of humour? Does this work?

what's your worst character trait? I can be so stubborn at times but I'm trying to work on this (and it's hard :( but we persist)

if you could change any detail of your day right now what would it be? To be honest... nothing. Idk like today happened how it needs to for tomorrow, you know?

if you could travel in time who would you like to meet? I can't think of anyone right at this moment

recommend one of your favorite fanfics (spread the love!): Ok I have more than one favourites but what I'll do is share the one that devastated me and that would be Chasing Cars. I've read it at least twice and after reading it the first time I actually cried a few times and stared at the ceiling while simultaneously making a playlist because there was just so much that I really wanted to say but I didn't know how to. Maybe I should start saving my fave fics because I have sooo much more I could share here but I can't remember the names right right now :(

And that's it! For the mooties… hmmm no pressure of course.. I'll tag @moochii-daisies and @ all my moots who see this (lol jk)

[ibuprofinator]

alright I beat veilguard, here are my thoughts. light spoilers but I'm avoiding anything explicit.

TLDR: worth it if you can get it on sale and can make peace with some cringe writing, lore changes, and lack of meaningful reactivity based on the race you choose. A major thing going for it is that it feels 100% complete and fully realized before release, which is more than what I can say for a lot of games. I had a lot of fun with it at the end of the day even if I doubt I'll replay it all the way through again any time soon.

Gameplay

The combat is very fun, and it's kind of incredible how different your experience of the game can be depending on your class (on a mechanical level). I've tried both mage and warrior, and their base mechanics are VASTLY different to the point where it feels like I might as well be playing a different game with some similar mechanics. I've talked to my friend who beat the game as a rogue, and even their mechanics seem very different from what I experienced from the other two classes.

The bad side of that is that they reuse the mechanics of a lot of enemies. It's not noticeable right away, but once you fight a few mages or two of the seven or so dragons you can fight in the game it gets very repetitive. The dragon mechanics barely changing depending on the type of dragon was especially annoying. Also, if you reach the max level (50) just know that enemies stop scaling after level 45 and things won't feel like a challenge anymore once you reach that threshold. For context I beat the game on the second hardest difficulty.

I still would've rather they changed around a few things so we could bring 3 companions with us like in previous games. I also wish they had more automatic skill use from our companions since I always forget to get them to use any of their skills. I heavily relied on some of the skill upgrades that had them use it automatically.

Exploration/Level Design

The world exploration is fine. I find that it's a bit too hand-holdy at times, and seems to rely heavily on giving you a shiny thing (chests) in order to keep you engaged which makes it feel cheap (in addition to all the chests/collectables being marked on the mini-map. again, a bit too hand-holdy for me).

That being said, I like how relatively limited the world is. Especially in comparison to Inquisition where there was just WAY too much. The areas aren't absurdly huge, but I felt like I was getting a good baseline for the vibe of whatever country I was in. In some ways, it felt like a more streamlined and higher quality version of the areas in Origins/DA2.

The areas are obviously very well thought out and designed, and I really enjoy the stark difference between areas you see both before and after your first major choice. I've seen people critique that choice being too early in the game, and I kind of disagree. My gripes with it are how it was handled after the change, but I'm not going to go into a tangent about that here.

The one thing that irks me to no end is the teleport beacon system. You always have a designated "respawn point" when you die. What this means in practice is that every single time you load a save that isn't in the middle of a cutscene, you'll spawn at whatever teleport beacon is set as your spawn point instead of where you physically were when you saved.

I hate this. To me it contributes to the cheap feeling of the game and also throws me off because every single time I loaded a save I didn't know what the fuck I was doing since often times I was far away from the actual thing I was in the middle of before I quit the game for the day. It's okay-ish if you're just tracking a quest, but there's actual world exploration in this game without markers.

Alright, now the actual writing of the game.

It's cringe too much of the time. It assumes you're not paying attention to anything most of the time. I hate the "next time on..." narration after the quests that sometimes outright spoil you for the next thing that's going to happen. I hate that you get the resolution to mysteries that have existed since Origins before you're even fully out of the intro to the game without giving any of it time to breathe.

Meanwhile, it seems unwilling to engage in anything that might potentially be vaguely "problematic". The companions don't argue, or if they do it's resolved almost immediately. Any tension between the companions is caused by one person having concerns about another person, and then the other person is like "yeah I get why you're concerned we're cool" (both in banter and in scenes at your base).

The world feels devoid of basic elements of previous games, like elven oppression, beyond a few non-specific references about "elves having it hard. In addition, they seem to be adding NPCs of different races to the background of the world seemingly at random. No, I don't think that there'd be this many vashoth or tal-vashoth shop-keepers in this part of Antiva, or this many elves casually intermingling with humans in Minrathous or all these veil jumpers that aren't elven much less Dalish.

It seems almost random, and more in line with modern dnd played for fun with friends or the atmosphere in the lower city in BG3 than a dragon age game. The fact that you can choose any origin regardless of your starting race is kind of insane considering the reality of some of those origins. There doesn't seem to be much, if any, intention behind it. Which makes it even more frustrating that I can count on half of one hand the amount of times it came up in any real way that I was playing as a dwarf, and lost track of the amount of times it should have considering a big part of the main plot has to do with dwarven history.

To be specific, and without giving too many spoilers, there's one scene where you find out something about the origin of modern dwarves. The "angry" dialogue option for that is for Rook to start yelling and making very good points, only for it to end with them saying that they can't dream with the same weight as everything else and it comes across as goofy as hell considering we don't know dick or all about the downsides to not dreaming in-universe. It's just something they can't do. But no, not dreaming is the same thing as your entire civilization crumbling right?

The companions themselves are written to be hard to dislike. Aside from Taash, all their hard edges have been smoothed down into something that barely manages to stay engaging. To be completely fair, I might be especially sensitive to this. I had just beaten BG3 and then DA2 before playing this game, and they're both games with a bunch of shitty people who slowly get better over time. VG, in contrast, doesn't have any tangible character arc for a lot of the characters outside of maybe one choice at the end of their quest line. Even then, it's minimal.

The game clearly has a few themes it was going for, but it either hits you over the head with them or doesn't earn them. There was one point where Rook (with no prompting from me!) said that their group had become a family. Which, yes they all get along and are working well together towards the goal of saving the world, but that didn't really feel earned at the point they said it.

Another theme I think they wanted were "a real leader takes responsibility for their actions" but we don't have any real options to either take responsibility or deny responsibility. This ties back to the issue I mentioned earlier where interpersonal problems get almost immediately resolved, and most were never even that serious in the first place.

There's a lot of explicitly telling you what the narrative themes are without following though. I've critiqued BG3 for hitting you over the head with themes, but it's NOTHING like what I've seen in VG.

They also have a very bad attempt at calling back to earlier parts of their arc/things Rook said. Forgive me for bringing up Astarion, but an example of that is Astarion saying "this is a gift, I won't forget it" both when he bites you for the first time and when he stays a spawn after killing Cazador. In Veilguard it's just people saying the same line almost verbatim about 100 times. Like I said earlier, the game assumes you're not paying attention.

And finally, I like the overarching story as a concept. Rook being forced to take responsibility for this team, in part because they feel guilty and in part because everyone else is too bogged down in their shit to do it so they HAVE to. And then working hard to build that team and the factions supporting them up in preparation to face something completely unprecedented? Then the individual plot points without having to slog through how they're written to get to the end? Love all that! Great bones to work off of!

I also really liked a lot of the arcs of the NPCs, and the one I think about constantly is Jacobus (SPOILERS IN THE REST OF THIS PARAGRAPH) specifically where Treviso is blighted. I'm not sure if it's different if Treviso isn't blighted, but I was so heartbroken by everything that happened to him culminating in him giving in to the taint to lead a group of darkspawn against the mayor to stop them from releasing gaatlok.

SPOILERS OVER

And that's the thing, there's so many little moments like that in the game that felt so incredibly real that it made me more and more frustrated at a noticeable amount of the game that seemed to be written by someone who read a few bullshit pop psychology articles and wanted to gloat about it by inserting a bunch of surface level mental health understanding into the game.

All that being said, and despite the fact that I don't think the game earned a lot of the character moments that came in the finale...it has, by far, the BEST end game sequence of ANY game - RPG or otherwise - that I've ever played.

I've never been hit so hard emotionally by characters I otherwise didn't give a shit about. I made one choice knowing it would result in someone specific dying (and I didn't really care because I didn't like them), but the way that person died and the way that death is talked about afterwards broke me in ways I didn't expect.

And the ending is LONG, too. It really feels like you're fighting a final battle alongside an army and the army is supporting the small group you're in so you can make it to where you need to go and kill the gods. And it feels realistic. There's no way everyone gets out unscathed, it's physically impossible in the game itself.

For a game that made me feel incredibly safe in the sense that all the companions had plot armor up until that point, it felt like a shock in a really good way. You spend all this time with your companions, learning about them and watching them interact with each other in the lighthouse and see their relationships with each other and then at the end of it there's nothing you can do to save some of them. Some don't die, but face something almost worse than death. And it's all for your benefit so you can have a small shot at pulling this off.

It's like the suicide mission in ME2 on crack in the best way possible. You learn things over the course of that long ass finale that made me look at the entire game differently and understand a lot of characters so much more.

To dial it back a bit, I think the romance in this game is pretty well done. I've only done Neve's, but it feels more realistic than other similar RPGs in the sense that y'all aren't falling over yourselves to commit to each other and there's no expectation on staying together after this. It feels like a new relationship, and she even still flirts with Lucanis which I honestly didn't mind! It, perhaps unintentionally, made it all seem that much more realistic plus it would've built up nicely to them getting together had I not romanced either of them.

It almost marketed itself as a dating sim, but really it's such a small part of your interaction with your romantic interest. I'm assuming other romances are slightly different, but I kissed Neve a grand total of one time before the finale and then there were a bunch of longing glances. I played with the idea of romancing Taash before reloading, and it feels like y'all are just incredibly casual about it even after going to have dinner with their mom. Both felt VERY realistic for the stakes of the game and the level of commitment both of y'all would be able to offer.

Do I think this is GOTY worthy? No, but I do think it's overall more fun to play than Inquisition which DID win GOTY. I think it's worth the $40 I paid for it, and I had a very good time playing it despite how much I just wish it wasn't a Dragon Age game. Unlike with Inquisition, I don't dread the idea of playing this game again. Leading up to me playing DAV, I was going to replay all the DA games, but I ended up skipping Inquisition because I did NOT want to have to slog through all of that again (I was doing completionist playthroughs).

The game is really good at cinematics and the big moments in the world, and I just wish that same love and care translated to. I don't know. The actual writing all throughout the game.

I really hope the series ends here, and they don't do something with the vague hints that have been in this game and Inquisition about some bullshit going on across the sea (the secret post-credits scene pissed me off but I'm not going to get into that).

It has a sense of finality to it, and I'm happy with this wrapping up everything I've seen this series build towards since I got Origins for Christmas when I was 13.

[ace-turned-confused]

get to know your moots

ty for tagging me @almostempty ilyyyy and i love doing these, they feel like doing surveys and if there's one thing my autistic ass loves, it's doing a survey

what's the origin of your blog title?: it's me being confused about my sexuality & identity

OTP(s) + shipname: okay my mom & i used to watch this show called major crimes, SHARON & ANDY FOR LIFE !!!!!! shandy stan until i die. i even had a fanpage for them on instagram.

favorite color: purpleeee

favorite game: rn it's INFINITY NIKKI !!! i am addicted. also replaying BOTW rn, valorant / fortnite with my cousin, oh and i'm basically becoming a professional phasmo player, also addicted to that.

song stuck in your head: baile inolvidable - bad bunny

weirdest habit/trait?: ummm i stick my tongue out when i'm concentrating? not all the way out like a weirdo, just a lil blep. i also brush my teeth in the shower.

hobbies: gamingggg, sewing, baking, vinyl records

if you work, what's your profession?: rn ya girl is unemployed :')

if you could have any job you wish what would it be?: trust fund baby. i wanted to do architecture but then discovered you have to submit a portfolio when you apply and i didn't do art for matric so. rip to that dream. also nearly went into microbiology.

something you're good at: sudoku.

something you're bad at: making conversation.

something you love: night drives with my bestie <3

something you could talk about for hours off the cuff: basically any game i play. you wanna know how to do a zero evidence run in phasmo? take a seat. valorant agent abilities? ask me. minecraft recipes? i got you. i often get asked "how do you remember that?" i'm autistic. i have autism.

something you hate: that i have to work to survive and pay for everything. going new places without knowing the parking situation. anything mint.

something you collect: trinkets. i love a trinket. i got a set of four tiny silver-plated brass chairs that are actually name place holders for my birthday that look amazing on my desk. i'd love to get more game merch etc but those kind of fun things don't exist much here in SA :( also lego, but i haven't got a new set in a good while now.

something you forget: to take my meds, names, events, happenings, etc etc.

what's your love language?: i yearn for physical touch but i'm touch averse :/ love some quality time.

favorite movie/show: love mamma mia that is peak cinema.

favorite food: i love pizza. i love lasagne. i love a good plate of chips.

favorite animal: I LOVE CAPYBARAS i love them so much. i have a capy plushie and he has a turtle backpack.

are you musical?: i played both violin and piano for like eight years? and i can sing if i try LOL

what were you like as a child?: anxious and shy. every teacher would love if i could participate more.

favorite subject at school?: biology & geography.

least favorite subject?: when i had to take it, history. that shit was boringgggg i'm so sorry. of the compulsory ones, probs english. i take everything at face value (autism) so hated poetry and having to analyse every fuckin sentence in a book.

what's your best character trait?: my honesty.

what's your worst character trait?: also my honesty.

if you could change any detail of your day right now what would it be?: idk make this shit more exciting probably. i'd put myself on a nice holiday.

if you could travel in time who would you like to meet?: a cowboy from the old west. and then he'd fall in love with me.

recommend one of your favorite fanfics (spread the love!): okay okay i LOVE seams by @fuckyeahdindjarin <3

npt: @burntheedges @milla-frenchy @evolnoomym @guiltyasdave @604to647

@sixhours @joelmillerisapunk @oonajaeadira @strang3lov3 @whocaresstillthelouvre

@mrsmando @mountainsandmayhem @sanarsi @mermaidgirl30 @sizzlingcloudmentality <3