#OKAY other side; i’m mexican. no idea if i’ve mentioned that before; but i am and i’m having a quince!

[ask-aph-angel-canada]

imagine posting on a regular basis, couldn’t be me

[lovelyirony]

dialogue prompt for Sam/Maria: "I wish you'd told me first."

had no idea what to do with this for nearly a year. but now i do 

When Maria joined SWORD, she was just expecting the usual problems: space travel, aliens without visas, and maybe Sharon coming back and annoying her about the “necessary” cappuccino machine in her office. 

She wasn’t expecting to be on the personal team to help Sam Wilson adjust to being Cap. 

This was...odd. It was weird for everyone. But she could roll with weird, so she asked Sam if he knew how to throw it like a Frisbee yet, or if his arm strength wasn’t there yet. 

“Oh ha, ha, so funny,” Sam says, rolling his eyes. “Of course I know how, I’m badass. I am Captain America after all.” 

Maria doesn’t say anything about the look in his eyes when he says that, like he’s so afraid that someone will tell him he’s not. 

And people will. 

Steve going back in time is on an extremely strict need-to-know basis. 

You can’t tell civilians there are alternate timelines or else you get a mess of epic proportions and the news coverage will not stop blaring no matter where you go, and sometimes Maria likes going to coffee shops for peace and quiet and the occasional croissant. 

Barnes is...Maria likes him. A lot, actually. He’s not what the history books painted him as, and he looks at situations like she does: carefully, and with the goal in mind.  

Sam is a lot like Steve, which is...stress-inducing. 

She had remembered when Sam had practically launched himself out of the old DC quarters and nearly died if not for the placement of the helicopter, and he’s not slowing down any time soon. 

Hayward is getting on her about it and if she’s being completely honest, she’s about to pull experience rank and tell him to fuck off and focus just completely on getting his head out of his ass. 

Sam is doing fine, considering every single circumstance he’s been put into and the minor PR fiasco by challenging Spider-Man to get his ass kicked. 

“I’m going to kill you,” Maria says when Sam picks her up from the airport. She had to travel because somebody told her that she’d be needed on a mission, and Sam was too stubborn to tell her. 

“We’re fine. Bucky and Sharon can help me.” 

“Well too damn bad, you’re getting Hill,” Maria says. 

“I wish I could take you seriously without the neon pink tank top you’re working with,” Sam says, grinning. “I think the brightest color I’ve ever seen you in is forest green.” 

“False, I was at the party that Ultron crashed, you saw me there,” Maria says. “And I don’t do warm weather. I had to buy this last-minute, so you’re lucky.” 

“You’ll need some other items if we’re gonna get anything done,” Sam mentions. 

“Fuck me,” she mutters. 

“Maybe later,” Sam responds lightly, and she gives him an eyebrow raise. He just shrugs and asks if she has a suitcase, which of course she does. 

- 

Sharon greets her with a smile and asking if she wants a beer. 

“What kind is it?” 

“Local stuff. Supposed to be hoppy.” 

“Ugh, fuck that,” Maria groans. “I’m not doing the shitty IPA beer. Who bought that?” 

“Me, and it’s good,” Bucky mentions from the couch. He’s a little worse for wear: it looks like he’s a day into his recuperation from the last mission. “How you doing, Hill?” 

“Better than you,” she mentions. “What are we dealing with?” 

Sharon fills her in, and Sam is reluctant to let her come. 

“Director’ll kick my ass if you get hurt. I’ll kick my ass if you get hurt.” 

“Quit worrying about me,” Maria says, pushing down the feeling of warmth that Sam’s statement gave her. “And if the director says shit, tell him to shove his boot up his own little-” 

“Okay, let’s not get riled up over this,” Sharon says. “Bucky and I were surveilling a little bit of it from the ground, Sam over here had a lovely aerial view. So let’s get a plan...” 

It’s a weapons shipment. Some old SHIELD stock that fell into the wrong hands and is falling faster and faster. 

“You miss it?” Sam asks her later that night. They’ve made a meal, and Maria is completely real, she can’t remember the last time she cooked with friends. 

(That’s a lie. It was after SHIELD fell and Natasha and her...well. It’s over and done with now.) 

“Of course,” Maria says. “SHIELD was my life. It was my first real job and I loved it.” 

“You think SWORD can do that?” 

“Depends on if Hayward resigns,” Maria says. “I never got to enjoy working with Rambeau.” 

“Was she the director?” 

“The founder,” Maria says, smiling. “I had met her a couple times. She was close with Director Fury, personal friends with Captain Marvel. Died some years back. Her daughter is back now, helping with some confusion in New Jersey.” 

“What’s happening in New Jersey?” 

“Trust me, you don’t want to know,” Maria says. “But let’s focus on this mission, and get it done.” 

“You think we’re entitled to some time off after this one?” Sam asks. 

“If we’re lucky,” Maria says. “Why?” 

“Wondering if you wanted to go to dinner with me,” Sam says. 

Just as easy as that. 

Maria looks over at him. 

“It’s optional,” Sam goes on, clearly a bit worried. “Did I ruin this, or...?” 

“No, no you didn’t,” Maria says, grinning. “But we don’t need to have time off for dinner.” 

“No, but we’ll need it for other things,” Sam says, waggling his eyebrows. “Like getting you out of that godawful pink top.” 

“Oh like you actually care,” Maria says sarcastically. 

 “The color? No. Getting it off? Yes.” 

Maria snorts, getting up off the porch. 

“Well come on, you insufferable romantic. We need to head to bed and get some sleep before tomorrow.” 

Sam smiles, accepting her hand to get up. 

“But you still want dinner, right?” 

“Everyone wants dinner, especially with a good date,” Maria says. “But I’m not doing pizza.” 

“What, no pizza?” 

“Reserved for extenuating circumstances,” Maria says. “Goodnight, Sam.” 

“Well, what about Mexican?” 

“...maybe.” 

“Chinese?” 

“Could also work, we’ll see what we’re feeling tomorrow,” Maria. “If not injured and sore.” 

She waves at the door at him, smiling to herself as she enters the room. 

Sharon’s sharing the room, and snorts at her. 

“So, you and Sam finally asked each other out instead of doing that weird flirty thing you do?” 

“What weird flirty thing?” 

“Where you pretend like you don’t let him get away with literally everything and he pretends like he doesn’t look at you like you invented the world?” 

“He doesn’t look at me like that,” Maria mutters. 

“You need to go to the eye doctor’s.” 

“So do you.” 

“Hey!” 

She shrugs off her outfit of the day, changing into comfy pajamas. 

Sharon’s dozed off, and Maria follows her in sleep, smiling to herself. 

(On the other side of the house they’re staying in, Sam is threatening Bucky with suffocation by pillow if he doesn’t shut up about Maria. 

Bucky is taunting him and saying that since Maria and he are friends if Sam kills him, he’ll never get that first date.) 

[xofanfics]

String - Part I

Prologue | Part I | Part II | Part III

Genre: angst, fluff, SMUT

Pairing: Baekhyun x Female Reader

Word Count: 3k

Summary: You find yourself in a friends-with-benefits situation with your best friend. You have no business falling for him, but your heart begs to differ. 

Your phone vibrated on your nightstand and Baekhyun’s picture popped up on your screen. You smiled and your heart fluttered as you raised your phone to your ear and heard Baekhyun’s sweet voice on the other end. He said, “Guess who’s back?”

You sat up in your bed with a yawn. “What time did you get in?”

“About five this morning. Did I wake you? It’s a little after seven.”

“Kind of...but it’s okay. I have to get up for work soon,” you said. “I’m glad you got back safely.”

“When am I gonna see you?”

“Are you free tonight? Let’s get tacos after work. I get out at five.”

“Taco Tuesday, huh?”

“Yeah. We have to enjoy our free time for the next week before classes start, right?”

“Yeah. I think I’m gonna take a nap. I’m so jetlagged.”

“Get some sleep. I think I’m gonna go back to sleep, too.”

“Good. See you later, cutie.”

*

You made your way to the restaurant. Situated near Times Square, you pushed past tourists and ignorant people that had no idea of the unwritten rules of walking around in New York City with a roll of your eyes. The restaurant you’d agreed on wasn’t anything fancy by any means. To be completely honest, their guacamole wasn’t good but their drink specials were better. With just a twenty dollar bill, you could have four margaritas if you wanted.

You went inside, showing the bouncer your ID before getting seated at a table. You knew it would start getting crowded soon as people started pouring in for happy hour specials.

Your phone vibrated on the table with a text from Baekhyun saying he was a block away. Your heart fluttered at the very thought of him. It had been three months since you saw him last but he’d still made time for you while he was in Korea. He still Facetimed you when he could, with the thirteen hour difference and all. He told you some things but you were excited to hear about his trip anyway. It had been a long time; three months too long since you’d seen him face-to-face. You couldn’t wait to see his face, to hear his voice, to feel his touch.

You ordered two frozen margaritas, in anticipation of Baekhyun’s arrival. You knew that he preferred them frozen and it was even better since it was so hot out today. And a few minutes after the waiter left to put in your drink order, you saw a familiar face coming through the door.

He showed the bouncer his ID before glancing around the restaurant looking for you. He didn’t find you immediately, his eyes darting from right to left, right to left. Your eyes met his a few seconds later as he made his way toward the back of the restaurant and he smiled brightly. You stood up in anticipation and he hugged you tightly, wrapping his arms around you. He’d never hugged you this hard and your heart was two seconds from exploding, with all of the pieces falling onto the dirty, wood floors of the Mexican restaurant.

“How’s my favorite girl?” he asked, pulling away with that warm smile you loved so much.

You broke out into a huge smile, one that you were sure your face was turning shades of red. “She’s good.”

He planted a sloppy kiss on your cheek before sitting down at the table. “Did you order something already?”

“Two margaritas coming right up,” you said, pointing to the waiter walking toward the table.

Baekhyun laughed as the man placed the drinks in front of you. “This is more like it. I’m glad you got frozen ones. It’s so hot outside today, I almost melted on the walk over from the train.”

You took your margarita glass and raised it up. “Cheers!”

“Cheers to the little bit of summer we have left.”

“That, too.” You took a gulp of the margarita and added, “So tell me about your trip. How was your summer in Korea?”

“It was great. It’s a beautiful place. I think you’d like it a lot. You’ve never been to Asia at all, right?”

“Nope. I want to go to a bunch of countries in Asia though. The closest to Korea I’ve been is Koreatown.”

Baekhyun scoffed. “That’s nothing. It has a similar vibe but Korea is way better. And so much cheaper. In Korea, you can get barbeque for around twelve dollars instead of paying four times that here.” He shook his head. “Food is cheaper, the streets aren’t dirty, and bubble tea is better, too. I got you a gift but I left it at home. I was halfway to the train station when I remembered.”

And with that, his story began. He talked about the foods he ate and the ones he thought you would like. He talked about the nightlife and how the party doesn’t stop until at least six in the morning, when the trains start running again. He mentioned his family and how he got to see his cousins that he hadn’t seen in years. He talked about all of the things he saw in Korea that he didn’t get to before. You watched his facial expressions while he talked. They were so pure, his dark eyes full of excitement, wonder, and awe.

“One day, I’ll take you to see Korea. I’ll show you everything.”

*

Two margaritas later, you were feeling the tequila in your core. The drinks were cheap and, surprisingly, they packed a punch. Baekhyun was feeling it too; You could tell in his eyes that he was tipsy and having a good time. His face was starting to glow a little and he was talking more loudly than usual.

You were excited to finally be with Baekhyun again; it was more than just the sex that you missed about him. You’d never felt like this with anyone. You and Baekhyun had so much chemistry. To you, he was perfect in every way. Even when he was being annoying or pissing you off your heart still fluttered the same, your knees weak.

You’d been with other guys but none of them could compare to what you had with Baekhyun. No man had ever treated you in the ways he had, even from before you’d had sex with him for the first time. As your best friend, he was always there for you and he never changed. Other guys before Baekhyun couldn’t compare. You swiped back and forth on dating apps, hoping to come across someone different but you never did.

You thought about what you said before he left, about dating officially when he got back from Korea. You were excited for him to be back. Now, you could be together for real. You had fallen hard for Baekhyun and being away from him for three whole months had been so difficult. Everyday you woke up, wishing that Baekhyun was holding you. With every passing day, you’d missed Baekhyun more and more, longing for a text from him, longing to see his Instagram stories he’d posted while you were sleeping. Now you understood how hard it was to maintain long distance relationships. Not being able to see or call Baekhyun whenever you wanted was strange. But you made it this far and, well, here he was.

Part of you wondered what he did in Korea. Did he sleep with other women? Baekhyun wasn’t the type to sleep around but he was flirty. The thought of him flirting with other women didn’t bother you. It was the thought of him touching someone else in the ways he’d touched you. It was the thought of him thrusting into someone else and making them feel good that made you feel uneasy. But Baekhyun wasn’t the kind of guy to sleep with as many women as he could; it just wasn’t in him to do it. Even with his good looks, it wasn’t in him.

You pushed those silly thoughts out of your head as the waiter brought the bill. Baekhyun took out his wallet, pulling out his credit card. “My treat.” He grabbed the check and paid for the drinks.

“Thank you.” You smiled. “Are you hungry? I’m starving.”

“I’m always hungry,” he said. “How about we get some tacos that are actually good?”

You stood up, grabbing your bag. “What about that place near school?”

“Sounds good. Let’s go,” he said, standing from his seat. He left a few dollar bills on the table and followed you out into the August heat.

Baekhyun put his arm around you as you walked to the train station, turning toward you. “I missed you. Korea would’ve been way better if you were there…”

“I missed having you around,” you said. “My other friends are great but they suck at being spontaneous. I miss our random trips around the city, even if it's two in the morning and we just wanted pancakes.”

“Well now we have plenty of time,” he said. “We should make a list of things we wanna do. And cross each thing off, one by one. Like the aquarium. Have you ever been to the aquarium? The one in Brooklyn?” You shook your head. “Yeah, let’s do that before school starts. We have a little over a week until the first day of classes.”

You said, “It’s free on Wednesdays.”

“Wednesday it is, then.”

You were excited to try new things with Baekhyun. While it was still warm out, you wanted to hang out with him as much as you could. New York is a beautiful place to be in the summer, you thought, but the winter months are hard to enjoy when the temperature drops under twenty degrees or so. But maybe this winter would be a little warmer with Baekhyun by your side.

*

His lips crashed into yours as you stepped into Baekhyun’s room. He shut the door behind him and whispered against your mouth, “God, I missed your pretty little lips…”

You smiled and pressed your lips to his. As he put his tongue in your mouth, you could taste the beer he’d had. You explored every inch of each other’s mouths as you peeled each others’ clothes off. You said, “Let’s shower…”

He smiled and followed you into the bathroom, watching your naked body from behind. He shut the door behind him as you turned the water on. When you turned around, you were met with a smirk.

You said, “What?”

He shook his head. “Nothing. I just haven’t seen you naked in a while.”

“Those nudes I sent you weren’t enough?”

“Nope,” he said, stepping closer to you. As the water ran, he stared at you for a moment. It had been a long three months and he was ready to devour you. He decided against giving into any animalistic urges he had, deciding that he wanted to take his time with you tonight. He wanted to give you a huge dose of what exactly you’d been missing. Your body was everything he could’ve wanted.

He caressed your face, looking into your eyes. He planted a sweet kiss on your lips and ran his fingers down your neck and to your breasts. He ran his thumb over your nipples, sending chills up your spine. His touch made you go into a frenzy. Your mind began getting overrun with images of all the dirty things you wanted to do to him at this moment. You wanted to forget the shower and fuck him right here on the bathroom floor.

As he moved down further and further to your sweet spot, you bit your lip in anticipation. But he stopped before he could touch you there and opened the shower curtain, motioning for you to get in. You pouted and got inside. Baekhyun joined you, caressing your hips from behind.

Baekhyun washed you up first, taking a little extra time down there, running his soapy fingers back and forth against your lips. You bit your lip, trying your best to keep it together. But Baekhyun knew you better than that. He knew that you were loving this and couldn’t wait to get you on your back to really make you feel good.

You washed Baekhyun up in turn, running your hands all over his body. Sometimes he let out a small sigh, especially when you were rubbing his balls. Baekhyun was impatient. He wanted you and he wanted you now.  

You’d barely dried off before Baekhyun was feeling you up, his hands going wild across your naked body. You missed this; you missed the way he always paid attention to you and how you responded.

You followed Baekhyun into his bedroom. He sat on the bed and you crawled into his lap, kissing him.

“I missed you,” you said.

“I missed you too,” he said, between kisses. He pushed you backward into the bed and got on top of you. “I missed the taste of you too. Come sit on my face.”

You smirked as you positioned yourself above Baekhyun’s face. Before you could balance yourself on the bed, Baekhyun had already grabbed your hips and pulled you onto his tongue. You held onto the wall for support. His mouth covered your lips and then he started feeling around the area with his tongue. Then he started attacking your clit roughly. He obviously didn’t forget how you liked it. He licked and lapped up every drop of wetness that leaked from your body. You moaned and body writhed as he ate you out.

Then, you got off of him and turned your attention to his rock-hard dick. You repositioned yourself above Baekhyun and you both went at it. You sucked his dick the way he liked it, nice and slow while you rubbed his balls. And he slowed down on your clit. The last thing he wanted to do was deplete you of your energy. He would tease you and drag it out until you came undone all over him.

Baekhyun pulled away and said, “You’re so ready for me.” He felt your pussy with his finger, swiping across it to feel how wet you were. With that, he flipped you over onto your back and hovered over you. You could feel how wet you were, how Baekhyun made a mess of you. He smirked and bent down to kiss you as he rolled a condom on. Within the same minute, he pushed inside of you.

Your lips parted in a low moan. You missed this feeling, this feeling of Baekhyun stretching you out and filling you up. He cursed under his breath as he began to thrust in and out of you, slowly but surely. His chest was against yours, his head in your neck. He planted a few kisses on your neck between heavy breaths. A few moments later, after teasing you with slow thrusts, he began to pick up the pace with short, deep strokes.

To be honest, Baekhyun was close. He knew that if he’d started pounding you from the first thrust, he’d come in ten seconds. So, he kept it cool and thrusted slowly. Plus, he wanted you to get off as well. And with women, he knew that perfect timing was the key to a clitoral orgasm. He thrusted again, sure to rub his body up against your clit. By now, he knew that this was one of your weaknesses and he could tell with the way you were moaning from underneath him.

He could feel your body shaking from underneath him and the scratches you were leaving across his back. He couldn’t see your face from this angle but he had an idea. He pictured this in his head as he thrusted into you.

“Fuck,” you whispered.

He turned to give you a kiss on your neck. “You feel so fucking good...”

Baekhyun lifted himself up, leaving you on your back. Then he lifted both of your legs up and over his shoulder. He started pounding you, sending you into a frenzy of moans. You let out a string of obscenities as he thrust into you harder. Baekhyun knew you were close; he started rubbing your clit. Your moans got louder, to the point where he thought that maybe his roommates would be able to hear. He didn’t care. All he needed was for you to come.

“Fuck, I’m gonna come Baekhyun…”

“Good,” he said, rubbing your clit even harder with his thumb. “Come for me.”

You were just a few seconds from losing yourself. You were blinded by pleasure as he thrusted and rubbed your clit at the same time. It had been so long since you came like this, being away from each other for three months. You held onto his arm as he pounded you and rubbed your clit like crazy. You were biting your lip to stop yourself from screaming out too loudly.

Baekhyun said, “Let’s come together baby.” He was watching your tits bounce as he was pounding you and the sight was starting to become too much for him.

At his prompt, you started coming. And Baekhyun knew this. You became a mess of moans and squeals as you came. Baekhyun followed, collapsing on top of you after a final, guttural groan.

The room was filled with the sounds of heavy breathing. Baekhyun gave you a kiss before pulling out of you. The condom was filled with Baekhyun’s seed. He let out a laugh. “Wow, this is what happens when you go three months without sex, huh?”

You smiled and sat up in the bed as Baekhyun put the condom in the garbage. He disappeared into the closest and came back with a stuffed plush cat. “I got you this in Korea.”

“Aw,” you said, taking it from him. “Thank you so much.”

“Of course. I wasn’t going to come back from Korea without a gift for my best friend.”

You got up to put on one of Baekhyun’s T-shirts. Baekhyun bit his lips as he saw you change. He loved to see you in his clothes. You joined him in the bed. You held the plushie, putting it in between you and Baekhyun. He chuckled. “So now I have to cuddle the cat too?”

“Yep,” you said, rolling over onto your side. And with that, Baekhyun took the plushie and tossed it to the other side of the room.

“Hey!”

[atc74]

Hi, Again

Warnings: Fluff, angst (if you squint), Jensen being smooth, but the reader being smoother...

Summary: Jensen arrives to pick Y/N up for their date. She surely expected a fancy restaurant with overpriced tiny portions, but what she gets is something entirely different. 

Pairing: Jensen x Reader

Word Count: 1610

Written for: @evansrogerskitten

Beta’d by: @amanda-teaches, my enabler for life

A/N: This is the long awaited sequel to Hi (read this first!), which was written as a request for @evansrogerskitten for a follower contest. This is a very special birthday gift, for a very special lady and very special friend. HAPPY BIRTHDAY ASH! I hope you have an amazing day! I love you lady!

As a reminder, this is a work of fiction and should be regarded as such. No harm is intended toward the actor(s) or their families.

Like Jensen’s scent? Buy it here from @scentsfromthebunker!

Previously in “Hi” 

A tall gentleman in a black suit approached me with a sign that had my name on it. “Miss Y/N? I’m Philip and I will be your driver tonight. Please, follow me.” He led me to a large black SUV and held the back door open. When I looked up, the first thing I saw was Jensen’s face smiling at me. He held his hand out for me and smiled as I stepped inside, sliding into the seat next to him. 

“Hi.”

Now...

“Hi,” I smiled back, my hand still in his. 

“Hi,” Jensen said. “And, I already said that. I’m sorry, I’m a little nervous, if you couldn’t tell.” 

I laughed. I was sitting with Jensen Ackles in the back of a black SUV with heavily tinted windows in Vegas, after a Supernatural convention. Then I realized I was laughing and attempted to pull myself together. “Jensen, I’m sorry. That was rude. I’m not laughing at you, I’m laughing at this. It’s all a little surreal for me. What am I doing here?” 

“What I said to you during the photo was the truth. For nearly a year, I have looked at every woman with even the slightest hint of red hair, just waiting for you to come through the line again, but it was never you. I had finally convinced myself I would never see you again, and then you were there, right in front of me. It was coincidence that brought you through my photos in Seattle, but I think it was serendipity that brought us together today.” Jensen clamped his mouth shut when he realized he was rambling. 

“Serendipity?” I giggled, a hand over my mouth. “I’m sorry. It’s just not a word one hears in everyday conversation. Then again, this isn’t every day, is it?”

“But I feel it just...it fits,” Jensen chuckled, shrugging. “Even if it does sound a bit silly. I’m sorry if I caught you off guard. I don’t do this, like ever. But, I think Jared was sick of listening to me go on and on about you and he made me promise to ask you out if I ever saw you again. So you are here for two reasons; one, because I am a man of my word and two, you said yes.” 

“I’d be a fool to say no. Or, I might be a fool for saying yes,” I said quietly, turning to look out the window at the desert flying by. 

A warm hand landed on my arm and I turned back, regarding Jensen’s touch on my heated skin. “I don’t think you’re a fool. I think you’re brave for taking a chance like this. On me.” 

I’d seen plenty of interviews and convention footage, but this might be the first time I’ve witnessed Jensen channel Dean Winchester. It was no secret that he’d been single for some time now, but at this very moment, he didn’t think he deserved a chance. 

“Don’t do that, Jensen. Let’s have dinner and play it by ear. Who knows, by the end of the night, you might be changing your mind,” I winked, laying my hand over his. 

“You’re wrong, but I think that sounds like a solid plan. We’re almost there,” he smiled, looking out the window. 

“Where are we going?” I asked, trying desperately to figure out where we were. I didn’t think Jensen was a serial killer, but we were out in the middle of the desert. 

“It’s a surprise, okay? Just a little bit longer, Y/N,” Jensen replied.

“You’re not taking me out to the desert to kill me, are you? I’ve watched enough television to know what happens out here at night,” I giggled nervously. 

“Now that you’ve figured out my plan, I might as well get on with it,” Jensen scoffed, pulling my hand towards him quickly. 

I was startled but the only sound I managed was a tiny squeak. I looked up and was met with the kindest smile and prettiest green eyes. His touch traveled the length of my arm until our fingers were entwined. He raised our joined hands and pressed a soft kiss to the back of my hand. 

“It was indeed my plan to kill you...with kindness, and wow you with a really romantic dinner. Is that not okay with you?” And there it was, the patented Dean Winchester smirk, followed by a wink. 

“Oh my god! I’m sorry! I’m ruining it!” I covered my face with my free hand, shaking my head. I took a deep breath before daring to meet his eyes. “That is actually really sweet and sounds like a great idea.” 

“Awesome.” 

We came to a stop, but as I reached for the door, Jensen stopped me, his hand still holding mine. “Just a few minutes longer. I’ll be right back. Please don’t get out. Or peek.” The look on his face told me he was serious, but there was an underlying twinkle in those green eyes, and I found myself nodding my promise to stay put. 

As Jensen and Philip exited the vehicle, I took the opportunity to calm my nerves. I gave myself a quick pep talk and tried to remember what the volunteer had told me, more than once. “Don’t be nervous; he is a nice handsome boy, but he is still just a person.”

“He’s just a man, Y/N. This is just a date. You can do this. You are not going to f-” my pep talk was interrupted when my door swung open to reveal Jensen and his smiling, stupidly handsome face. My thoughts got the better of me. Yeah right. He’s just a man. He’s just the most beautiful human ever created.

“Ready?”

“I’m ready.” 

Jensen took my hand once more in his, helping me step down from the vehicle. He placed both his hands on my shoulders, looked into my eyes and I was mesmerized. “Do you trust me?”

I don’t know why, but I did. I had absolutely no reason to trust this man, but I did. “I trust you, Jensen.” 

He smiled wider than the Grand Canyon and turned my body away from him. It was then that I felt his hands covering my eyes. “No peeking, Y/N.” 

We walked several feet, me shuffling carefully in front of him until he slowed his pace and I felt his hands slip from my eyes. “Keep your eyes closed for me, sugar.” 

My skin tingled from his touch, my heart from his endearment. I nodded, feeling him slide around my body. “We’re going to sit down, right here. I got you, easy now.” 

My body lowered to the ground, something soft covering it, a blanket maybe? “Okay, you can open your eyes now.” 

I slowly opened my eyes, blinking and taking in the surrounding area. It was breathtaking, and I stared in silence at the scene before me. We were sitting on a mountain side, high above the desert plains, and looking down at the Hoover Dam. It was lit up from the base in a cool blue light. With Lake Mead an inky midnight blue behind it, I’d never seen it look more beautiful, more ethereal. 

“This is remarkable, Jensen.”

“I was hoping you’d say that. I’m also hoping that this doesn’t outshine the rest of the evening I have planned,” he chuckled slightly, reaching behind him and revealing a honest to goodness picnic basket. 

“Look at you, playing the romantic-picnic-overlooking-a-national-landmark-card,” I mentioned casually. 

“Is it working?” Jensen winked. There was enough moonlight to see each other as it highlighted Black Canyon and the Colorado River below us. 

“Hmmmm,” I coyly toyed with him, tapping my index finger against my lips. “Whatchya got in there?”

“Oh do I have stuff,” Jensen announced excitedly as he opened the basket, laying everything out in front of us. “We have a taco buffet with all the fixings, like five different types of salsa, chips, fresh guacamole and, wait for it...a pitcher of margaritas!”

“How did you do all this?” I was stunned. “And, have you been spying on me? Who told you I love Mexican?” 

“I knew it!” Jensen pumped his fist victoriously. “Really it was a long shot, but I was craving Mexican and thought, what psycho doesn’t love tacos?” 

“Holy crap! You just quoted Dean Winchester, but swapped waffles for tacos!” I laughed so hard I think I may have snorted. 

“That was honestly the cutest thing I’ve ever heard,” Jensen laughed, pulling me into his arms. 

We had a peaceful dinner overlooking the dam and the surrounding mountains, playing twenty questions about our lives. Jensen reached into the basket and pulled out yet another container. “And the piece de resistance.” 

“Did you bring chocolate cake?” I eyed the decadence filled container with lustful eyes. 

“Damn girl. Forget the way Dean Winchester looks at pie. I want you to look at me like you’re eying up this cake!” Jensen laughed, pulling the cover off and waving it in front of my mouth. 

“Jensen, do not tease me. I will eat that with my fingers!” I warned him, but he didn’t give up. I reached up with two fingers, dipping into the cake and sliding them into my mouth, feeling bold.

“Holy shit.” He murmured, almost indiscernible over the sounds I was making. I noticed he seemed uncomfortable, but he teased me with cake, I could tease him back. I dipped my fingers back into the cake and held them in front of Jensen’s mouth. He took the bait. He grabbed my wrist with one large hand and halted my movements. His tongue snaked out, licking a bit of the sweet dessert from my fingers, before he dipped his head, sucking both of my fingers into his mouth. 

The sounds coming from his mouth were purely pornographic, to say the least. I felt my nether regions tingle at the sight and sounds of Jensen Ackles licking chocolate cake from my fingers. Feeling even bolder, I leaned in, licking the rements from his lower lip. “Fuck, that’s delicious.” 

“You took the words right out of my mouth, sugar.” 

Did you like it? The nicest thing you can do for a writer is reblog their work and tell them, and others, how much you like it!

The Whole Enchilada: @iwantthedean @dolphincliffs @mrswhozeewhatsis @flamencodiva​ @blacktithe7 @evansrogerskitten @amanda-teaches @hannahindie​ @wotinspntarnation @winchesterprincessbride @winecatsandpizza​ @kickingitwithkirk  @wi-deangirl77 @hobby27 @mogaruke​ @gh0stgurl​ @alleiradayne @idreamofplaid @manawhaat @crashdevlin​ @thoughtslikeaminefield​ @emoryhemsworth​  @imaginationisgrowth​

Jensen’s Jamboree: @jerkbitchidjitassbutt​ @dean-winchesters-bacon​ @maddiepants  @adoptdontshoppets​ @supernatural-jackles @fandom-princess-forevermore @akshi8278​ @thing-you-do-with-that-thing​ @deanwanddamons​

[artificialqueens]

Vicks VapoRub-Me (Trixya) - DenDenMonMon

Of Lovers, Friends and Everything in Between. Part 6.- Unwell

Title: Vicks VapoRub-Me Category: M/M Summary: Unfortunately, he has never eaten knives before, but he figures it would feel similar to this. Notes: Massive disclaimer, this is by far not my best work. I woke up one day feeling like absolute shit, so it felt appropriate that I portrayed exactly that, that’s why I decided to take on this prompt. Seriously felt like dying and couldn’t even function properly, so I kinda gave up on this; then Miss Corona decided to come visit and I didn’t really feel like writing a sickfic at the time. Anyways, it took me months to finish this simple one shot but here it is. I hope you enjoy! (because I still feel like dying). -Monkey Written: Feb 21st, 2020 - April 25th, 2020

Vicks VapoRub-Me

 “I am so sorry, Pete,” he lets out before sniffing yet again. “You know I wouldn’t be doing this if it wasn’t bad. I seriously feel like absolute shit.” He moves the phone away from his face as a sudden sneeze escapes him.

He catches the end of Pete’s sentence when he puts the device back to his ear. “…worry,” he assures. “I’ll let everybody know, and we’ll continue shooting on Monday, how does that sound? You just stay home and rest up, okay? Have you talked to Trixie?”

“Not since last night.”

“Okay, I’ll call her. Keep me posted. Hope you feel better.”

He pronounces some grunts of agreement before disconnecting the call.

He’d known something was wrong since the night before. He’d been out late, having ice cream with Amy. The air had been cold, but it felt good against his constantly overheated skin. They’d walked back to his apartment without rushing, enjoying the cool California weather.

As soon as his head hit the pillow later that night, he found himself regretting that little stroll. His nose was stuffy and he had trouble swallowing. He’d sent his complaints to Trixie through text messages, but had also stated how his body was always on his side and he hadn’t gotten a cold in ages. The itchiness in his throat had kept him awake, but Trixie, who wasn’t suffering the symptoms, had fallen asleep mid-conversation.

He grabs his phone, with the sole intention of letting Trixie know about the development of his state. The string of blue bubbles is overwhelming. A countdown of how many hours of sleep he would’ve gotten, if he fell asleep right then, had been sent every hour.

He closes the conversation and throws the phone on the empty space next to him.

Maybe if he showers, he will get to feel better. Cleanse his body of all toxins, or whatever. Yeah, that sounds like a good idea. Until he throws the covers away, that is. The temperature of the room is colder than he had expected, or maybe he’s running a fever, because the chilled air makes his skin tingle as soon as it touches it. With a deep sigh he turns around, grabs the covers and turns himself into a blanket burrito again. It’s time to take a nap, put his body into low power mode and let it fight whatever it is that’s making him sick.

He sleeps for an hour, or three, or six, he doesn’t know; but he’s suddenly awakened by the doorbell sounding incesibly.

“Jesus. Go away!” He screams into his pillow, sinking deeper into the mattress. The person doesn’t do as they are told, and the bell is heard again. “This better be a major fucking emergency.”

This time he doesn’t make the same mistake as before. He grabs the blanket at the top of the pile and wraps it around his shoulders. Still mumbling curse words is that he reaches the door. He opens it without asking who is on the other side, but is ready to give them a piece of his mind for waking him up. The concerned features disarm him on the spot.

“Oh, my God, Katya. Are you okay? You look horrible!”

“Well, good morning to you too, you fucking bitch,” he pretends to be offended as much as he can, but his body is still not responding properly.

Trixie makes his own way past Katya, carrying several plastic bags in each hand. “Good morning? Girl, it’s almost four in the afternoon. I’ve been calling and texting you. When the messages didn’t show delivered I got worried, then the calls were not connecting. I decided to come see you.”

Katya looks around, as if the device would magically appear somewhere around the living room. “I don’t know where my phone is. It’s probably dead somewhere.”

After dropping everything on the coffee table, Trixie walks back to Katya, who hasn’t moved from his spot next to the door. “I brought you some food. Pete told me you were not feeling well, but this seems, like, super serious.” He grabs Katya by the hands and basically drags him to sit on the couch. “How are you feeling?”

“Well, you-you…” A sneeze interrupts his speech. Trixie reaches inside a bag and takes out a box of tissues before a second sneeze escapes Katya. “Thank you. Now, look away, this is not going to be pretty.”

Trixie laughs but does nothing to divert his eyes as Katya blows his nose. He even offers his hand for Katya to place the used tissue. Katya simply makes a face of disgust and puts it on the table in front of them.

“So, is it like a cold,” Trixie inquires. “Or what is it that you are feeling?”

“You know, it’s so weird. Whenever I move, it feels as if part of my body moved and then it took a second for, like, my other half to catch up. I don’t know how to explain it.”

He doesn’t have to, before he even finishes his sentence, Trixie is already nodding. “Those body aches are signs of a fever. Hold on.” Once again, Trixie starts going through the bags in front of him. “I didn’t know what you had so I stopped by the pharmacy and bought a bunch of shit. I know the lady sold me a thermometer.”

“Is it rectal, mother?” Katya asks in a watered down version of Maureen’s voice.

“Oh, my God,” Trixie says between giggles, finally finding the thin tube. “Glad to know the cold hasn’t affected your sluttiness. Now open.”

Katya does as he’s told, parting his lips as Trixie puts the instrument under his tongue.

“According to this thing, we need to wait a minute and a half,” Trixie informs him as he puts the instructions aside. “Okay, now, hear me out.” He starts speaking more to himself, to fill the silence around them, as he takes his purchases out of the bags. “I went to the drug store to get you, like, cough drops or something for the flu, you know, just in case. When I was there I remembered what happened to my uncle Steve, you remember him, right?”

With the glass tube still in his mouth, Katya shakes his head.

“Yeah, you do. He went to rehab. I’ve talked about him several times. Anyways, when he came out of rehab he had this thing for, like, NyQuil and stuff. He couldn’t even see cough syrup ‘cause it was, I don’t know, triggering, I guess.”

Katya can’t help but smile. The way Trixie speaks with his hands, as much as he does with his mouth, will always be fascinating. He mumbles something unintelligible around the thermometer, then tries to muffle a laugh.

“Shut up! It’s not gonna work if you are talking!” Trixie warns, waving a finger in front of him. “As I was saying. I called Valentina. She’s always bragging about how Mexicans are the best at home remedies, and she gave me some useful tips. That’s why I brought you chicken broth, ‘cause apparently soup only works in movies. She told me to get a shit ton of Vicks VapoRub, and that you should put it on your chest and the sole of your feet. Now, she mentioned something about wrapping your feet with newspaper, but I guess a pair of socks…”

The rest of his rambling gets immediately lost to Katya’s ears. Maybe it’s the fever, or maybe it’s the lack of sleep, but Katya has never felt more loved or taken care of in his life. His eyes water as they analyze the intensity with which Trixie is speaking. He is so worried. He’s dropped everything to be there for Katya; went out of his way to not only buy him drugs for his sickness, he took in consideration Katya’s sobriarity.

Almost without thinking about it, Katya leans forward and drops his head on Trixie’s shoulder. That’s enough to stop the rambling. Trixie’s hand goes up and caresses Katya’s unshaven cheek. The room is completely silent, their breathing synchronizes after a few seconds and soon that’s the only sound filling the air around them. It’s comfortable, it feels like home.

Suddenly, Katya doesn’t feel so sick anymore, his body doesn’t ache as much, his lungs are pulling oxygen in again.

“Let me take a look at that,” Trixie says quietly, not really wanting to interrupt the moment but needing to check the thermometer. He removes it from Katya’s mouth, and puts it up against the light, that’s when he realizes. “I don’t know how to read this thing! Don’t they sell like electronic ones? Shouldn’t this thing say something like: yes, you are hot, or no, you ain’t dying, bitch, you ain’t that special?”

Katya takes the thermometer in his hands, doing his best to breathe as he laughs and coughs at the same time. “It’s ninety… ninety-nine and a half, maybe? That’s not bad. Fever, I believe, starts at, like, a hundred. Anything higher than that is, like, really dying.”

He says it as a joke, as a way to light up the mood, but Trixie’s face turns somber. “Ninety-nine and a half is basically a hundred. So you do have a fever, don’t you dare die on me, you idiot.”

“I’m fine. I do feel like taking a shower, though. That can bring down my temperature, plus, I’ve been sweating a lot.”

Trixie nods his head. “Okay, you go do that, I will heat up the food. You think you can eat?”

Already standing up, Katya agrees. “Yeah. Warm soup would feel nice down my throat. I have never eaten knives before… unfortunately… but it feels like that’s the only thing I’ve been eating.”

“You know what else could feel nice down your throat?” Trixie tries to joke, but laughter makes it hard for him to even finish the sentence.

Katya stops cold on his tracks, turns around and points a finger at him. “Hey, if you are not planning on putting your huge ding-dong in my mouth, don’t you joke about that.”

Lifting his hands in surrender, Trixie walks away, occupying himself in the task of heating up the food for his sick friend.

The shower is quick, Katya doesn’t feel like standing under the spray of freezing water, or at least that’s how it feels against his hot skin. The drops leave a tingling feeling as they travel down his body, hopefully taking germs and viruses away with it. When he enters his bedroom, it feels as if his heart has dropped to his feet as well. The lights are off, all but the lamp on the bedside table. Trixie walks in with a tray in hand. There’s a bowl that probably has the broth in it, a glass filled with juice, another one with water, and some containers that surely hold medicine in them to make him feel better.

“Get in the bed,” Trixie commands, pushing his chin towards the unmade covers.

Katya doesn’t even question it, he unties the wet towel and throws it on a chair. The sheets feel cool as he places them around his lower half. Just when he’s feeling himself relax, he’s startled by Trixie’s hand on his chest.

“Don’t you ever touch me,” Katya says more out of reflex, doing absolutely nothing to remove Trixie’s fingers from his skin.

With a small eye roll, Trixie continues on his task. “Shut up, you big baby. I need to put this VapoRub on your chest to, I don’t know, open up your lungs or something like that.”

That’s when he sees it. Trixie sees the corners of Katya’s mouth slowly curling into a smile he knows very well. It is a very telling smile. Katya knows his thoughts are not socially accepted, yet he will proudly express them. As soon as the blindingly white teeth are in full display, Trixie lets out a sigh as he dramatically drops his shoulders.

“What-what now?”

With lifted eyebrows, Katya uses his eyes to make Trixie look down, towards his bottom half. The sheets are slightly lifted and Katya laughs as soon as the ‘oh, wow’ is pronounced, indicating Trixie understands what’s going on.

“Bitch, I’m literally putting medicine on your chest. This can’t possibly be turning you on.”

“No, no, no,” Katya quickly corrects him. “Getting a boner is not an equivalent of getting turned on. It’s just a physical reaction to human touch.”

Trixie sits on the edge of the bed, ignoring the response of Katya’s body, and carries on with the task. “When were you last touched by a human?” He asks with a twist of his lips, trying to make it sound sarcastic, and expecting Katya to bring up a weird story of how he was last touched by a demon or something of the short.

None of that happens.

Katya looks away, almost ashamed. Almost. Shame is not part of his vocabulary. Yet, there is no other word that could describe the somber air taking over his features. There is a sigh before he looks back at Trixie. Something immediately changes. His eyes are a shade darker than usual, they look straight into Trixie’s soul, and he can’t take it. He has to look down, to the container of medicine still in his hands.

“Hey,” Katya speaks, softly, almost in a whisper. Trixie nods, acknowledging he’s heard him, but still not able to look up. “Thank you,” Katya finishes. The tone of his voice is deep, laced with something that Trixie doesn’t dare to figure out.

He shrugs a shoulder. “No problem,” Trixie assures Katya, toying with the blue jar. He doesn’t elaborate, he wants to make the weird cloud above them go away. He presses two fingers into the scented gel before running it against Katya’s skin.

Trixie tries to concentrate on applying the medicine into Katya’s chest evenly. His hand travels from one pec to the other slowly. His fingers make sure to lightly touch one of the bugs, permanently drawn on Katya’s shoulder, before making his way to the one. He does his best to ignore the deep stare of his friend burning the top of his head, he doesn’t pay attention to the uneven raising and falling of the chest he’s touching. He really wants to, he is really trying. It’s useless.

Soon, he finds himself licking his lips, he feels the throbbing in his pants, he loses control of his hand. Without even thinking about it, he takes more medication but his fingers land on Katya’s stomach this time. His fingertips trace the toned abs, his nails scratching slightly. He goes lower and lower until his hand disappears inside the covers.

It burns. It really burns. When the ointment reaches the delicate skin, Katya closes his eyes. He wants to open them, he wants to see Trixie’s hand going up and down on him. He wants to have a good look at Trixie’s face as he pumps him; but he’s too weak. His mind is fogged with fever and lust. He is struggling to pull air in when his lungs are still not fully working. All he knows is that Trixie’s soft touch is taking care of the throbbing of his lower half, just as he has been taking care of his sickness for the last hour or so.

He has to do something, as a thank you. He blindly pats down the mattress, finds Trixie’s legs, and the bulge between them right after. Slowly, he opens his eyes, just to find Trixie’s stare.

“Brian,” Trixie whispers, no other word is pronounced but all motion stops. “I’m sorry,” he says, releasing him with a heavy exhale. “I shouldn’t have done that. You are sick, you are not feeling well.”

“So what?” Katya sounds almost angry. “It’s not like we are kissing. Surely a cold is not dick-to-hand contagious.”

Trixie stands up, maybe some physical distance could work in their favor. “That’s not what I meant, bitch. I just… I don’t know. It feels like I’m taking advantage of you.”

Katya sits up, making sure the covers don’t fall and add awkwardness by revealing his erection. “Hey, listen. Nobody is taking advantage of anybody. If anything, I’m taking advantage of your good heart to fuck you. You have been such an amazing friend and, honestly, the only way I know how to communicate is sexually. I kinda sensed this was where things were going. I’m sorry. I know you have made it perfectly clear, right from the start, that it couldn’t happen. I need to respect that.”

Folding his arms across his chest, Trixie taps his foot softly against the floor. “What if…” he trails off, his eyes avoiding Katya again. “What if I want something to happen?”

“You do?” Katya doesn’t do anything to hide the excitement in his voice.

Trixie nods. “I do. But not like this, though.”

“Oh, no! God! Not like this,” Katya agrees.

A small smile creeps into Trixie’s lips, before he goes around the bed and climbs next to Katya. “Why don’t we wait until you feel better and revisit the subject?”

Katya lays back down and faces him with a giant grin on his face. “I feel better already.”

[issabakugodrangeel]

My Second Chance

Skz 10th member Au

A/N: So I’ve actually have written this a long time ago just never had the guts to publish it but my skz feels are making me do this so I hope you guys enjoy this I love reading 10th member Au’s I think they’re fun also sorry for any grammar mistakes still learning 

Warning: ITZY will be mention in my story and I don’t mean no hate towards them I thought it’d be a fun to add some drama to this so I do apologize if you guys are ITZY stands again this is just for fan fiction please don’t take it personally 😣

Lisa’s P.O.V

5:00 am

I lean back on my bed, letting out a grunt. I was really never a morning person but I had too since I'm a trainee for JYP Entertainment.

I stayed in bed for a few more minutes and got up to get myself ready for practice today. I had a feeling that today something was going to happen. I couldn't put my finger to it so I just shrugged it off knowing it'd be the same as it always has been for 7 years.

After about 20 minutes of getting ready I got my bag and everything I need before heading off. I quickly stopped at a caffe to grab a drink and a small bite to eat, now making my way over to the JYP building.

-------

Going up to the practice room, once I opened the doors, I saw 'them' and by meaning 'them' (yes these are the ITZY members) Yeji, Jisu (lia), Ryujin, Chaeryeong, and Yuna. They looked at me and just laughed at me. I glance at them before I ignore them and went to my corner to set my things down.

I had some beef with them in the past and I still do. They would always hate on me for some reason. I wouldn't lie if I said they don't try to bully me when they actually do, even tho I'm older than they are. I don't even know what I did to them to begin with. I just remember Ryujin saying 'my kind' shouldn't belong here. I assumed it was my race. My korean was still not perfect but I was at the point were I can keep up a conversation. I never told JYP about this because I don't want to start more drama.

"She still here?" Yeji rolled her eyes at her friends as I heard them whispering stuff about me. At this point I'm used to it. "There's no way she's going to debut, she's been here for 7 years already." Yuna scuffed. "Don't worry girls this just proves her dream is nothing more than a dream." Yeji laughs along with her members.

I rolled my eyes and started putting on my dance shoes. 'I will debut'

"Enough about 'that thing' you won't believe what I heard." Ryujin changed to a different topic. "What did you hear?" Chaeryeong asked her. "You know my friend Han Jisung?" The girls nodded. "Well he told me that his friend Bang Chan is putting together a group and he already has all his member but Jisung told me that they're looking for one more member, and  that member happens to be a female." Ryujin smiles.

"what really?" Yeji says. Ryujin nods. "Jisung said he doesn't know who Chan has in mind but it could be one of us." Ryujin tried to contain her exigent. "I'm dying to know who it is." Jisu fixed herself in the mirror. "Well one thing is for shore it wont be 'that' over there." Ryujin teases as the others agreed.

I chuckled to myself like I cared.

"Alright girls start stretching." Our dance teacher comes in as everyone got to their places.

-------

After a couple of hours I collapsed in the corner of the practice room. I was beyond exhausted. The other girls quickly packed up their things and left. I usually stayed behind to get some practice in. I always like being myself anyways. To be honest I never really fitted in. I wasn’t pretty like the others or skinny. There wasn't really a place for the out-of-place Mexican/American even tho I'm very light skinned most people thought I was some sort of Asian in me. Sometimes It cheered me up but then sometimes it didn't. I didn't try to think much of it as I just wanted to make my dream happened.

  I was actually in a group before called B.A.P but we were so underrated but I loved our fans everything was going perfect till our company started treading us like shit and wasn’t paying us right. Slowly one by one each member’s of B.A.P left. It what was best for us even tho it did hurt inside. They we’re everything to me. Luckily I got another chance to be able to debut here at JYP. I still talk to the other members but now as much as before.

Placing my arm over my head to block out the lights I heard the door open, causing me to get up. 

“Sorry didn’t mean to scare you.” An all to familiar voice says in a heavy Australian accent. He was scratching the back of his head.

I place a hand over my chest to keep my breathing steady. “Oh, no it’s okay.” I said. We stood there in a awkward silence. “Did you need the room? I was just about to leave.” I asked going to pick up my stuff. He reached out his hand to stop me. 

“N-no it’s fine. I don’t really need the room.” He says politely. I looked at him confusingly. It look like he has something to say but can’t put it into words. “I actually came here hoping to talk to you. If you have time.” 

“You want to talk to me?” I pointed at myself. 

He nods. “Yeah, Clarissa right? Do you have a second to talk?” I was shocked he knew my name. 

I nodded slowly. “Y-yeah. You can just call me Lisa it’s much better. Sure I got plenty of time. Practice just ended anyways.” I smiled. 

“Perfect. Sorry, I’m Bang Chan or you can call me Chris.” He sticks his hand out for me to shake it which I take. 

“I know. We had a few classes together but we never talked did we.” I mentioned. 

He frowns. “S-” 

“Don’t worry about it. I’m not much of talker to begin with. Also you’ve been apologizing a-lot since you got here.” 

He chuckles. “Right, anyways the reason i’m here is because I have something I need to talk to you about.” He starts taking a seat on the black sofa. I sat on his right side. 

“You know the show case is next month right.” Chan asked me I nod my head remembering. “Are you signed up?”

“Ahh, not really. For some reason JYP doesn’t want me too.” I give him a sad look.  

“Oh. Well, after 7 years of training JYP nim is actually giving me a chance to let me pick out my own group to enter for the show case.” 

A smile grew on my face. “Really? That’s amazing wow. I can’t believe he’s actually having that much trust in you.” 

“Thanks. Ya, know for someone I just met, you seem awfully happy about this.” He gives me a wired funny look. 

“Everyone deserves a chance to debut right? I’ve heard some of your productions and you got some sick beats. You’re really talented.” I said sitting crossed legged. Even if we haven’t talked I’ve seen him hanging in the building a lot with headphones on his head. I really do admire his work.

“Thanks, again. You’re pretty amazing yourself. I was a fan back in your B.A.P days. And I’m one of your subscribers too.” He smiles. I gave him a small sad one in return. 

“Really? You’ve been there since then?” I asked in aw and kinda embarrassed. Yet I felt very grateful.

He nods.“To tell you the truth, I already picked out my members I think I want to debut with.” I think I knew where he was going with this. “But, I figured there was something missing. I talked to JYP about this as I was forming the group and he thought it would be a great idea.” He stop for a moment as if he was nervous to say the next sentence. “I had this idea of adding a female member to my team. He wasn’t sure about it at first till I mention a certain someone.” I could feel my heart accelerate.

“Lisa, I wanted to ask you to join my team.” He glances up at me meeting my eyes. He takes a deep breath before continuing. “ I know you’re probably still hurting from your pervious group. And I know I’m asking a lot form you to having you be in the same situation again, but I honestly feel like having you in our team could take us somewhere.” 

A lot was happening in my head at the moment. A huge part of me wanted to scream yes i’ll join your team but at the same time I was feeling scared. Being in all boy group again just made me relive the hate I have received. I didn’t wan’t Chan’s group to go through that with me. 

“You really want me to be in your team?” I said with a shaky voice. 

He gently grabs my hands in his. “ From the start I was forming the team, I always had you in mind. When I first heard you were going to be a trainee here I fanboy so hard. I wish I had the nerve to talk to you back then, but JYP told me how B.A.P was falling apart and I didn’t want to be selfish and snatch you when you lost a family.” 

The moment he held my hands this warm feeling sparked off.  

“How about this? You don’t have to give me an answer now, come with me and meet the other members tomorrow for lunch. I have a feeling once you meet them things will be different.” I don’t know why I was being pulled to him. It was like the universe was telling me to go with him.    

“Okay..... I’ll meet them.....”

‘Why do I feel like this was meant to be?’

Chan just gave me the biggest smile. 

--------

Lisa SKZ 10th Member Masterlist

[ckret2]

OOOH! Okay I'll be more specific :D I mainly struggle with my writing style and how I want to describe things- I usually make my fics up as I go b/c I usually hesitate to write an outline b/c i usually don't get a solid idea how I want it to go i guess?? how do you usually plan out your rodorah fics too btw?

And here's the second half of the question!!

I shared my outlining process for longfics, but for short fics I usually don't outline either. What I do do is decide what one specific thing I want my fic to do, and then I write toward that. In this one my goal was “split off from canon exactly one second before Ghidorah commits the act that sets him on the path that dooms him—killing Mothra—and do it in a way that allows Rodorah to happen.” In this one my goal was “holy shit i decided my two main characters don’t speak the same language, how the fuck am i going to get them to actually communicate with each other?” In this one my goal was “uhhhhhhhhhhh get ghidorah to not leave earth,” with a side of “remember that basically all kaiju conflicts are resolved by physical altercations rather than arguments so have them actually fight from time to time!” and a dessert of “Rodan deserves to win some fights, I want to write him winning some fights.”

In the fic after next—the one I’ve already written but not posted yet—my goal was first “when Rodan visited Mothra I had a hard time explaining in his & Ghidorah’s combined twelve vocabulary words where he was going, I need a quicker/easier way to have Rodan explain to Ghidorah where he’s going when he makes a day trip away from Isla de Mara” and then it was “Rodan should make a map. A globe. Rodan’s gonna make a globe. out of lava.” and then it was “it’d be a great way to show Ghidorah’s psychology and the way he looks down on species he doesn’t perceive as ‘machine maker’ species—including looking down on his own species—for him to be like ‘oh that’s cute Rodan’s making a ball’ and then be like ‘holy shit holy fuck he made an accurate world globe that’s amazing i am not smart enough to be hanging out with this guy.’” And by that point, I had a whole-ass fic, because it has the process of Rodan making this object and cutting back and forth with Ghidorah’s perspective as he first wildly underrates Rodan’s project and then wildly overrates Rodan’s project. And all that started because I was annoyed a dozen fics ago over trying to write Rodan explaining his travel plans.

But aside from those goals—goals which, sometimes, are very small—I often don’t start a fic knowing where I’m gonna go with it or everything precisely that’s going to happen.

And so the other things that guide my fics as I’m writing them—to ensure I don’t accidentally spin myself off sideways into a plot where the Mexican Navy declares war on Ghidorah and we totally forget about Rodan or a plot where aliens invade the Earth and then I don’t know how to continue and stop writing—is a handful of long-term goals. I’m not going to list all of them, because some of them would be big spoilers for eventual plot points, but among them are obvious things like “eventually Rodan is going to fully return Ghidorah’s feelings,” and “SOMEDAY Rodan’s gotta find out that Ghidorah was trying to destroy the planet,” and “I’d like Ghidorah to casually visit another planet to get Rodan presents, while Monarch flips its shit because this dude just brought back rocks from Venus and it only took him a couple of weeks”—things like that.

So as I’m writing, even if I’ve got no idea how or why I’m going to write those things, they’re in the back of my head. I know to not, like, have Ghidorah do things that Rodan absolutely can’t stand, because that’ll get in the way of Rodan falling for him—instead I should fic by fic be giving Rodan more things to like about Ghidorah. And then when I see a small opportunity for Ghidorah to do something little that would impress Rodan, I take it.

I don’t know when the hell Rodan’s gonna find out Ghidorah was trying to destroy the planet, and I’ve got a half dozen fuzzy ideas for what the consequences of that event could be but haven’t settled on one yet—but even though I don’t know when I’m gonna do it, I’m always very conscious of the fact that Rodan doesn’t know yet, and I’m especially conscious of that during his interactions with Mothra—because like I don’t want the conversation to get tilted in a direction where she’ll end up just casually mentioning it to him, because that’s NOT a casual discovery, that’s a revelation that deserves to be the climax of a scene because it’s got the potential to shake up or even destroy Rodan & Ghidorah’s relationship depending on how they navigate things after that.

I don’t know when Ghidorah’s going to visit another planet yet, but I know that for that to make sense, he’s got to be in a position where he feels like getting Rodan gifts—which means a) he’s got to find out that earthlings are into giving each other physical items as markers of affection/courtship, and b) he’s got to develop to a position where he feels more free to express his affections toward Rodan in ways other than quick headbutts or cuddles he immediately gets embarrassed about, and c) he’s got to feel secure enough in his relationship with Rodan that he won’t think it’ll crash down if he leaves for a couple weeks, and d) San’s got to feel securely anchored enough to his new home on Earth that he won’t be afraid that making a short space trip will drive the other two heads to go “actually, yknow what, now that we’re already out here, screw Earth, let’s move on to the next solar system and never come back,” and e) Ni’s got to be on board enough with this relationship that he won’t grumble and grouse about making a big damn elaborate trip just to grab some trinkets for their bird. Those are a bunch of tinier goals that I can work into fics one by one.

One of my goals is for Gigan to show up on Earth eventually, ya know, for the drama of it all. I don’t know when or how, but it means when I wrote the one fic I’ve written from his perspective, I knew to set it up so that it would make logical sense from that fic when he eventually pops up on Earth.

So that’s a way to write fics, especially short fics, and especially a series of short fics, without an outline. Think of it like a connect-the-dots picture. You might have one or two vague or distant goals—say, "I want these two characters to get married eventually”—and that’s one dot in the distance you’re trying to reach, and so you’re vaguely thinking about how to reach that dot and you go, “well, it’ll be hard for them to get married because they’re in enemy factions,” and now you’ve got a new dot to stick a little closer than the distant one, “one character switches sides,” and now you’re like “but why would that character switch sides?” and now you’ve got a dot a little closer that’s like “this character decides they hate their current faction,” and that scene might be ten fics away, but right now you’re writing fic #1 and decide while writing this character have an argument with their commanding officer that the officer should slap them, and that plants the first seed for their decision to switch sides. How do you get from the slap to switching sides? You don’t know! But now you’re sorta pointed in that direction. And maybe when you’ve written enough fics and added enough dots and connected a few lines, when you get to the “this character hates their current faction” dot you realize that they’re in a position where they can run into the woods between the two enemy factions in order to cry for a while and they could run into the character you want them to marry and hey, now they can have a heart-to-heart, and this pushes them further in the direction you want—you didn’t plan it originally, but because you’ve got that Get Married goal in the distance, you know vaguely which direction to steer even if you aren’t sure which roads you’re gonna take.

It helps to have a “solid idea” of what you want to happen in a story, but tbh you don’t need a whole fleshed-out solid plotline. You only need one goal, and then you aim toward it.

[koganphrancis]

I hesitated to make any kind of post about Episode 8 because I know that by the next episode/end of the season so much of what happened will be a big stinking pile of moot points-hell, by the end of the episode so much of what had gone on was already moot, but maybe typing some thoughts out will prove cathartic.

Okay, so without context, Ian’s proposal was pretty sweet and exactly what Mickey deserves to be told-”I want you because I love you and I trust you and that means the world.”  Too bad we can’t be sure that Ian meant it-it really didn’t sit well with me at all that he had that “you’re a Gallagher-you lie” conversation with Lip.  Was it supposed to apply to this too?  (and see?  I’ve already broken my “without context” attempt)  

But, anyway, watching it the first time I couldn’t help but see the Aladdin scene, and damn it, Mickey deserves to be treated like a Disney prince!  

But, ugh, out of all the contrivances they could’ve thrown in each other’s way on the path to the altar.  What the show came up with is spiderweb thin at making any sense, complete with gaping holes.  Why, if Ian’s so good at reading Mickey, did he not see that Mickey was delightedly surprised at hearing that Paula was dead?  Why were they both so convinced the other did it?  They weren’t given a scripted reason to believe it-it was just the very heavy lifting of (especially) Noel and Cameron that made their “discussion” about it even remotely watchable.  But even casting all that aside-whatever testimony either of them could’ve given wouldn’t have implicated the other anyway.  All Mickey would be able to say, if asked directly about Ian’s whereabouts-IF he still thought the murder had taken place the night before (getting dizzy trying to follow the spin of their web?  I am)-was that he assumed he was at home but didn’t know.  Ian would only be able to say Mickey wasn’t at his house till late.  No prosecutor would take that to court-not knowing where someone is when a crime’s being committed isn’t anything close to proof that they did the crime.  And the only way the cops would know they both said they wanted her dead, which again, isn’t proof that they acted on it, is if they offered that up themselves.  Ian and Mickey and their various relations have had enough experience with cops to know you don’t do anything but answer questions, and sometimes not even that-if it can’t be proven, they’d know to keep their mouths shut.  The show makes me tired.  

Back to the diner-Mickey is so upset when Ian first “proposes”-he clearly hates the idea Ian only wants to do it as a legal loophole maneuver.  Ian not only talks him into it, he does so by convincing Mickey they’d be marrying for love and the moment Mickey says, “I do” numbnuts Ian ought to realize it’s written in stone.  (I’ve seen some online chatter that Ian had every right to change his mind at the courthouse and in my opinion that’s just not true-the diner, when Mickey was giving him every opportunity not to commit, was the time for Ian to back out.  Not, once again, right at the finish line.)

And I know we’ll never know and I should just file this in the same place I’ve had to put Ian’s “larger concerns” line-but I wish the show would give a minimum of effort and please try to show us how Ian went from insisting “not for me” when S3 Mickey tried to say marriage is just a piece of paper to scoffing at Mickey at the end of S5 when he paraphrased wedding vows to now, when Ian said, “Fuck no” when point-blank asked if he was going to marry Mickey and to Ian tearing the rug out from Mickey’s feet right when they were called up to be married.  I’m sorry, I’m not buying the Monica and Frank thing-from what the show has told and shown us, the entirety of Ian’s life they never lived as a married couple.  Hurricane Monica would intermittently drop into their lives and wreak havoc, but there’s no stories about her sticking around very long or her and Frank ever acting like husband and wife.  Ian can’t be thinking marriage to Mickey would be like that for them.  So, give him a reason and share it with the audience.  Not to mention, tell us what Ian’s S3 definition of marriage was.  

On to the courthouse.  Another reason Ian seemingly “fooled” Mickey was because of the kiss he lays on Mickey-if he was entertaining second thoughts, it sure didn’t look like it here.

Mickey wasn’t expecting it, but he was thrilled to pieces to get it-how did Ian turn on a dime-or, if he wasn’t feeling it, why did he do kiss him at all?  I ask that last because when I was watching the episode, even if I didn’t know what’s planned for future episodes, I would’ve caught the look on Ian’s face that was very reminiscent of his face at the bank near the Mexican border as soon as he turned away from the kiss.

And look at poor Mickey!  So full of love and hope for their future!  Never knowing Ian’s about to fuck it all up-again.  

And then the punch-what I really REALLY hated about it (past the obvious “no one should ever be hit” policy we should all live by) was that it gave the Mickey critics (coughhaterscough) more ammunition to say what an abusive thug he is and poor little Ian deserves better-as if there’s anyone in the entire history of fiction better than Mickey for him.  But, the more times I’ve watched the scenes, the more I get why Mickey did it.  Ian asked him a question, and he let him know what it felt like to have Ian rip his heart out and show it to him still beating in his hand for at least the fourth or fifth time.

I’m sure it did feel like a punch to the face :(  And Ian did say he wanted to know how Mickey felt, so now he knows.  (Plus they had to write in Ian’s busted leg, but that could’ve been done in a much better way.  I’m not in the “Ian could’ve tripped down the stairs chasing Mickey” camp, because that wouldn’t explain their break up-in character, Mickey would’ve stayed by Ian’s side if he was hurt doing something like that.  I think a better way would’ve been to have Ian get drunk on his meds since the show insists on showing him drinking, and had him back in his little twin bed, passed out and alone.  Lip comes in from the RV to take a shit in the Gallagher’s downstairs toilet-since the show insisted on making that stuff canon-and sees knocked over empty beer bottles and a nearly empty bottle of Jack Daniels open on the kitchen table when he gets out of the bathroom.  He goes upstairs and finds Ian-after checking the room with the accordion door-and rolls him over so if he pukes he won’t choke to death.  Ian sort of comes to and tells Lip he fucked up yet again with Mickey and he doesn’t think he’ll be coming back this time, so Ian should go to Terry’s and tell him how much he loves him.  Lip talks him out of that, knowing the last thing Ian’s ready for is a face to face with Terry, and tells him to wait till morning, and preferably when Terry’s not at home.  Ian agrees and passes out again, so Lip leaves.  The show ends and in the mid credits, Ian’s shown lying on the bed where we left him, but his eyes pop open when he hears a door downstairs being open and shut.  He goes to go down the front staircase but drunkenly trips and busts his leg.  Shameless throws some of their signature “comedy” at us by having Frank stagger up the stairs-it was he who came in the door-to where Ian’s writhing in pain and blearily look at Ian’s covered leg that has an outline of a bone poking out his sweatpants.  “No sense in hurting yourself here, there’s no money in it,” Frank says, as he continues up the stairs past Ian.  “Drag yourself to the train stop and say you fell on those stairs.  You can sue the city, the CTA, the stair manufacturer...” Frank’s voice drifts off and the credits resume.  

One last thing-as the season continues and Ian and Mickey have done no more than share a few closed-mouth kisses, I can’t help but wonder if they’ll continue with them seeing barely more action than another classic couple.  I truly begin to despair of seeing them in bed-I bet the wedding ep ends with them driving off-no honeymoon :/

(gif credits: Diner-kirbyhope, Kiss-mlminmedia, Post kiss-mickeygifs, Courthouse stairs-gallaghersdaily)  

[startofamoment]

please come in and just sit here for a while ♥

Jake’s laughing so hard, Amy’s sure he’s going to wheeze himself into a poorly-timed asthma attack. The last thing they need right now is to have to call for backup while he fumbles with his inhaler.

“Alright, alright,” she grumbles, her cheeks warm with embarrassment. “So a double date with a young Al Gore at the Louvre isn’t the most plausible. But you asked for my dream date– you didn’t specify it had to be realistic!”

He snorts, but she shoves him in the shoulder before he can devolve into another laughing fit.

“Aw, you gotta give yourself some credit, Santiago. A date like that could totally happen.” He pauses, amusement clear on his face. “Just remind me to tell your future boyfriend to invest in a time machine.”

He ducks before she can shove him again, and just like that he’s doubled over and full-on giggling once more.

“Like your dream date is any less ridiculous,” she huffs.

He swipes at his eyes and coughs, taking a moment to settle his breathing. “Oh, I’ll have you know my ideal date is plenty realistic but dare-I-say still very romantic? The Jake Peralta boyfriend experience is quite intoxicating, thank you very much.”

She raises an eyebrow but nods for him to go on. For sheer curiosity’s sake, if nothing else.

“I’m a simple guy. I don’t have to go to a fancy museum or whatnot to have a good time. All I need is a few fluffy blankets, chairs and stuff for structure, way too many pillows, maybe some of those fairy lights to set the mood… You following me here, Santiago? I’m talking me, my boo, and the most epic pillow fort you’ve ever seen. We’ll sneak a laptop computer into the fort and put Die Hard on, duh, and then it’ll be candy and cuddles from there on out.”

She hums, vaguely impressed but not at all ready to admit that that does sound like a respectable stay-at-home date idea. (She’s even further away from acknowledging that she maybe also thinks all of that with Jake specifically sounds more than ideal.) “Movie night in a pillow fort, huh? Never took you for someone into textbook rom com dates, Peralta.”

“Hey, I like cuddles and warm blankets! They make me feel safe,” he shrugs, then shifts to smirking and waggling his eyebrows at her. “Besides, a pillow fort is the perfect place for a good ol’ make out sesh. Seriously, by the end credits, my date and I would totally be–”

“Okay, I’m going to go ahead and stop you there before this gets wildly inappropriate. Still technically work hours, Romeo.”

He sends her another cheeky grin before raising his binoculars and redirecting his attention to the warehouse they’ve been monitoring. She refocuses as well, filing this new fact about her partner somewhere in the back of her head – to be compartmentalized and hopefully forgotten, along with her mental catalogues of Weirdly Cute Things Jake Has Done and Shirts Jake Has Worn That Make His Arms Look Good.

“Are your eyes covered?” She asks, glancing behind her to triple check before unlocking her apartment door. “No peeking until I say so, okay?”

Jake scoffs but keeps his hands over his eyes. “Ames, if this is your way of easing me into blindfolds and bondage, let me tell you–”

“Oh, hush. I told you, I just need to make sure everything’s ready.”

They step into her entryway, with Jake following closely behind her then staying put when she tells him to.

Amy makes quick work of depositing her bag and shoes in their designated places, hanging up her coat, and running to get the string of lights plugged in. (She’d made sure the whole setup was prepped even before going to bed the night before, but she’d intentionally left the fairy lights off lest she be schooled by fire marshal Boone of all people.)

She surveys her living room – or what used to be her living room and what now is an organized mess of sheets strewn over dining chairs and pillows lain on every available surface – one last time before taking a steadying breath and turning back to her boyfriend. “Okay, Jake, you can look now.”

He drops his hands to his sides, and Amy watches as his expression morphs from confusion to wonder.

“Oh my god. Is this– It’s– Holy shit, it’s a pillow fort!”

He sheds his jacket and toes his shoes off as fast as possible, tripping over his socked feet to scramble into the makeshift entrance, half-squealing and half-rambling like an excited child the whole way. Amy laughs, already starting to feel pleased with herself as she crawls in after him.

“Amy, this is amazing! Did you put all of this together on your own?” He’s beaming, eyes shining with unbridled joy. In the few seconds it’s taken her to settle in against a strategically-arranged pile of pillows, he’s managed to wrap himself up in one of the three fleece blankets she’d prepared for them to use. (She’s going to have to do so much laundry this weekend.)

“Mhm,” she nods, hoping she’s coming off cool when actually she’s buzzing with giddiness from the inside out. “Do you like it?”

“Like it? I love it!” He falls back onto the thick floral comforter lining the floor beneath them, closing his eyes and making a satisfied hum before looking at her again. “Not to be weird, but you are making teenage Jake so happy right now. Like, I for realz would spend hours trying to imagine how my fort would look like and this– yeah, this is pretty darn close. The only thing it needs is–”

“Snacks? Check under that couch cushion.” She smiles, pointing to the spot beside his arm.

He sits back up then lifts the pillow in question, gasping loudly. “Gummy bears? Fruit Roll-Ups? One, two, three… seven types of chocolate, and even the Mexican candy from the bodega near the precinct? Amy, I–” His face shifts to something between bewilderment and awe, sending another surge of nerves through her. “I don’t know what to say… This is literally my dream date. How did you know?”

“Well, it’s... kind of a weird story. You’re going to laugh.” She stops, looking down and tucking her hair behind her ears while she searches for the right words to say. She’d known, logically, that it was much more likely he’d forgotten about their random conversation way back when, but a part of her had just hoped he’d remember so she wouldn’t have to explain herself like this.

“Come on, Ames. I promise I won’t laugh,” he says gently, nudging her leg with his foot. “I swear I really only want to know how you somehow read my mind. I mean, I know my school counselor said I should’ve kept daily diaries back then but I absolutely did not, so there’s no way you broke into one of those. Did I drunkenly blurt out my mushy teenage fantasies at Shaw’s the other week?”

She shakes her head, fiddling with the hem on the nearest pillowcase. “Not last week or at Shaw’s. I don’t expect you to remember this because it was at a stakeout a few years ago, but we’d talked about our ideal dates and you’d mentioned movie night in a pillow fort, so…” Her voice trails off as she digs underneath yet another blanket for her laptop and DVD copy of Die Hard.

She almost cringes when he doesn’t respond immediately, and it takes all her courage to get herself to look up from the loading screen.

He’s got that boyish grin on his face, of course. (It’s not fair that she still finds him ridiculously attractive, even when he’s obviously over the moon at her expense.)  

“You said you wouldn’t laugh,” she says, pouting.

“I’m not! I’m just–” His grin widens into a smirk. “ So, so glad I finally have proof you’ve liked me for ages. Wow, Ames. You’ve been holding onto this piece of info for years, just waiting until you could finally put it to use, huh? That had to have been at least three years ago by now, right? Gosh, Amy, I had no idea–”

“Shut up and eat your candy,” she grumbles, throwing a packet of fruit leather his way.

He snickers but doesn’t say anything more as he tears into the plastic and bites into the chewy candy. The tips of her ears burn just the same, with her lack of an outright denial loud and clear in the air between them.

“It’s okay, babe,” he says brightly, laying a sticky kiss on her flushed cheek. (The brand new pet name isn’t lost on her at all, but she’ll unpack her feelings about that another time.) “I’ve most definitely liked you for way too long, so at least we’re even.”

[phoenixmakeswords]

Broken Wings And Dragon Dreams Chapter 6

So this is the beginning of the end. Kinda sad about it. No trigger warnings for this chapter, outside of two brief mentions of racism towards the end.

[[READ MORE]]

Aaron motions for me to sit next to him at the table. Kai keeps glaring at Eirnin irritably, which is nothing new. The plan is for us to hang out and play games. I don’t think it will be that simple, though. Not with the way Kai acts. How Eirnin can be so calm is beyond me; I’m not the one Kai has a problem with but his behavior still has me on edge.

“You alright, boyo?” Eirnin asks, bumping my elbow with theirs.

“Shoulder. Wing. Whatever it is.”

“You don’t have to play if you don’t want to,” Aaron reminds me gently.

“I want to.”

Just because I’m frustrated by my disability and still sore from getting the crap knocked out of me again doesn’t mean I don’t want to spend time with people.

“Are you gonna deal or not, Fae?” Kai snarks.

“Are you gonna be bad-tempered all night, wolf?” Eirnin arches a manicured brow in warning. I can almost feel the waves of magic rippling from them.

“Kai, don’t push them.” Aaron sounds mildly concerned. “I know it’s close to the full moon, but be nice.”

“What are they gonna do? Turn me a funny color?” Kai’s voice turns cruel as he turns to Eirnin.

“Try me, boyo, and see.” Their slight Irish accent becomes more pronounced. Their eyes—glamoured an electric blue—sparkle dangerously, reminding me of lightning flashes.

I’ve never seen Eirnin go off and I don’t want to. They’re well within their rights to turn Kai into a fly or something.

“Either chill out or leave, Kai. You’re not gonna bully them.” Aaron’s voice has gone from concern to irritation.

“Side with them. You always do,” Kai spits, storming out. I flinch when he slams the door.

My heart jackhammers in my chest. I dig my nails into my thighs as the terror and panic hit. I’m on the verge of a panic attack.

“Hey. Hey. Leo, it’s not like before, okay? No one is gonna put their hands on you. Nobody. You’re safe,” Aaron murmurs, squeezing my forearm gently.

“Uh-huh.” I exhale shakily.

“You okay, boyo?” Eirnin asks, touching my good shoulder gently.

I nod jerkily.

“Thank you. He would have kept going.” There’s bitterness in their voice.

“I know. And I know he’s a mess around the full moon, but he’s always a monster when it comes to you.” Aaron has gone from squeezing to rubbing my arm gently. It helps. He helps.

“Oh, no, no, no. You did not just say that.”

We were supposed to play games and hang out. So far, all we’ve managed to do is spat.

“What?”

“You’re not one of us, right?”

Aaron nods slowly. He looks apprehensive.

“So it’s kinda like—If a straight person called you queer, you’d be offended, right? Because it’s a slur then. Whereas, if Leo or I called you that, it would be okay because we’re part of the same community. Does that make sense?” Eirnin doesn’t sound angry. Which is surprising in a way after Kai.

“So I need to not do that.”

“Right.”

“Feel free to call my father one, though. Even without being a shifter, he’s a monster,” I mumble.

I flinch when Eirnin stretches. I know they won’t strike me, but the sudden movement startles me.

“I won’t hurt you, boyo. Do you want to call it quits on a game night?”

“I think it might be a better idea if we did. As upset as Leo is, I don’t wanna add more stress to him or push him more,” Aaron replies.

I offer Aaron a grateful smile.

“I’ll head out then. Hey, you ever want holes poked in you, hit me up.” Eirnin squeezes my good shoulder lightly on their way out.

“See you Wednesday.” Aaron hasn’t stopped the gentle way he’s rubbing my arm. I wish he wouldn’t be this nice; it makes it hard to not love him.

He guides me carefully to the couch.

“I’m sorry about Kai,” he murmurs.

“It’s fine. I overreacted.”

“No. Kai is a butt. He triggered you. He was mean to Eirnin. Besides, there’s something I need to talk to you about.”

“Have I done something wrong?” I sink against the back of the couch defensively.

“No, you’re fine. I know what you said before. And I thought about it. Do you really still love me?”

“Yeah. You were the only guy I ever wanted.” I manage a sad smile.

“You still willing to have a sexless relationship?” He toys uneasily with his ring.

He’s changed a bit in five years. I don’t know how I missed it before. Like the black ink, standing out in contrast to his beige skin, just barely peeking out under the edge of his sleeve. The almost-always present worry in his dark eyes. There’s other changes I can’t quite put my finger on. He’s not fifteen anymore.

“I’ll make it work.”

“I thought about it. And I’m willing to have an open relationship if we try again. If it would make it easier.”

“What’s that gonna do to you?”

He simply shakes his head.

“It’s not worth it. I love you. I loved you when you came out and I love you now.”

“My last relationship broke up because I wasn’t willing to put out. I want you to be happy. And if that means an open relationship, which I’m not entirely okay with, then that’s what I’ll do. You said you liked Eirnin. I can talk to them about it if you want.”

“Could we at least try before we decide to go with an option you’re not okay with? I was happy before.”

“Thank you. Is tomorrow okay?” He smiles uncertainly. Like he thinks I’m messing with him.

“Whenever you want.”

“We can go to the Harvest Festival if you want. I don’t know how you feel.”

“I’m still pretty sore. As long as we take it slow, I should be fine.”

Besides, I’m not turning down the chance to be with him.

It feels like fall outside. The cool, crisp air makes me want to snuggle with Aaron under a blanket. I wish the leaves would start turning, but they’re still vibrantly green.

I reach tentatively for his hand. We’ve never been able to do this. We always had to hide because of my dad.

“Your hands are like ice,” he remarks as we start down the sidewalk.

“Sorry. So, how’s your family?” I haven’t heard him talk about his family since we reunited. I haven’t asked either, though. I’m not sure why but I haven’t.

“They’re okay. Rosa has her own restaurant. Authentic Mexican food. Like Abuela’s tamales. She’s making them really proud. Making me really proud. I mean, my big sister is making a name for herself here. It’s kinda a big deal.”

“Your grandma makes the best tamales. It’s a very big deal and you should be proud. I’m proud of her and I’ve only met Rosa twice.” I beam at him. I love his family.

“I’ll tell her you said that. Might leave out the dragon bit. I don’t want her to have a heart attack. I was actually worried about introducing you to them.”

“Yeah, the dragon thing is a bit much. Why?”

“Because my family didn’t come here legally. Because I got the windshield busted out of my truck because I’m Mexican. Because people here are racist bigots. I was afraid you would do something to get my family deported.”

“I remember when that happened. The truck thing. Have you had more things like that happen? Aaron, I would never do that.”

“Yeah. It’s not great. At the time, I didn��t know that.”

“I’m sorry. I have one more question for right now. What’s the tattoo?”

“I’m never changing who I am. It’s an Imagine Dragons lyric. Kai did it for me.”

“I like it.”

“I’m glad I found you. I liked flipping houses with Bryce and his friends. That was the whole plan. Flip it, make easy cash, wait for the next one. I’m not doing it anymore.”

“I am too. I have more questions.”

“You’re full of them today.” He smiles teasingly. I love how his eyes look in the sunlight. They remind me of warm honey in the light.

“You have pretty eyes. How did you get started doing tattoos?”

“Thank you. I always wanted to do something with art. And tattoos fascinated me. I like it.”

The sound of the festival has begun to hit my ears. We’re still a couple blocks away but close enough I can see the brick courthouse. A band is playing somewhere on the square.

“I remember you drawing a lot. I really thought you would do something with music. Or at least with your voice.”

“I don’t sing much anymore.” He smiles sadly. The Aaron I knew before loved singing. He had a beautiful voice.

“You don’t?” I never thought I would see the day he didn’t sing.

“No. After you left, after I got kicked out of chorus, I don’t do more than sing in the car.”

“Wait. What happened with chorus?”

He was kinda a star in chorus. He usually got the solo. He was incredible. He and I had talked about him trying out for American Idol after graduation. So this is a bit of a shock.

“I got into a fight. And kicked out. He was being racist and I defended myself. You had just left. I was hurting. He didn’t get in trouble. I got suspended. I haven’t had the same passion since.” He runs a hand through his short-cropped hair. I recognize this gesture. He’s uncomfortable.

“You shouldn’t have gotten in trouble. I loved when you would sing.”

“Yeah?” He actually stops to stare at me.

“You have a beautiful voice. Your singing made me—It felt like home.”

I remember the night after our first date. The first night I slept at his house. I remember the way he held me close and how safe I felt. I remember the smell of s’mores on his breath as he sang Take Me to Church quietly. The smokiness of his voice reminded me of the smokiness of the marshmallows.

“I never knew that.” The words come as a whisper.

“It’s one of my favorite things.” I squeeze his hand gently.

I didn’t realize how many people would be at the festival but it’s packed with people. There are vendors scattered about the square. A band on stage playing covers of classic rock songs.

“Do you wanna go?” Aaron asks, surprising me.

“We just got here.”

We haven’t moved yet. We’re still trying to decide where to go first.

“I know but your dad is over by the cider stand.”

I follow Aaron’s gaze. He’s not wrong. It makes me a tiny bit happy to see my dad’s busted up from our fight. It’s a perverse sort of pleasure. Recognition flickers in his eyes before he turns and walks away.

I’m finally free. Or he’s faking me out. But I think it might be over, I think, watching him leave.

For the first time since I came out, for the first time in five years, I can breathe freely. I am free to love the man holding my hand.

Taglist: @vnsmiles

[bucky-at-bedtime]

Buddy Pt. 3

Summary: Bucky tries to save a dog when it is involved in a car accident, only to discover his cute neighbour is a veterinarian. A series of meet-cutes occur and with the help of a certain dog, the two end up tangled together.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Vet!Reader

Warnings: None!

A/n: Chapter 3 - featuring ma boi Sam Wilson. Pls Reblog guys!

Let me know what you think!! if you wanna be tagged just send an ask x

Words: 1900

Part 2//Masterlist

The next day, Bucky arrived at the clinic at 9am, newly-acquired blue leash and soft leather collar in hand, his overgrown hair tied back into a bun, and a seemingly new denim jacket pulled over his shoulders.

You greeted him at the door, smiling warmly when he handed you another latte, already sipping on his own.

“You ready?” you asked him, already unlocking the door and reaching over to switch on the lights.

He nodded, trying to hold back the grin that wanted to stretch across his face. “Yeah, I’m ready.”

The two of you walked through the clinic, making a beeline towards the room where the dog had been sleeping. When you opened the door, he was already up, limping as quickly as he could towards you and Bucky, who crouched down, affectionately scratching the dog’s head.

“Hey, you ready to go home, bud?” He whispered, wrapping the collar around his neck.

“Let’s get you sorted with some paperwork and then you can take him back to your apartment,” you stated, filing through some drawers and pulling out the things you needed. “Have you thought about a name?”

He looked up at you, surprise flickered through his blue eyes. He shook his head, “I didn’t even realise I’d get to name him.”

“Well, we don’t know what his name would have been before,” you explained, filling out the information you already knew. “He’d probably be scared by that name anyway.”

“Right.” He was sitting on the ground now, the dog panting happily between his knees. Bucky looked down tracing his fingers gently across his back before his eyes flickered back up to you. “What about Buddy?” He asked. When the name escaped his lips, the dog twisted his head around, stretching up to lick Bucky’s jaw. A smile tugged at his lips.

“I think that’s a great idea,” you chuckled, “He seems to respond pretty well to it already.”

“You think that’s a good idea Bud?” He murmured into the dog’s furry neck, subsequently getting attacked by licks.

You filled out the name on the form; ‘Buddy Barnes’  and then stood up, allowing Bucky to be alone with his new friend as you went to photocopy the forms.

A few moments later you re-entered the room, laughing when you saw Bucky lying on his back, Buddy draped across his entire torso.

“You two are cute,” you chuckled, filing away a copy of the papers as Bucky maneuvered out from underneath the dog, brushing off his jeans.

“You think I’m cute?” He smirked.

“I think that dog makes you cute,” you sassed, despite the blush you could feel rising on your neck.

He chuckled, moving to stand beside you and gently nudging you with his elbow. “Guess I’ll have to keep him around then.”

You glanced up to find that smirk hadn’t left his lips and shook your head, unable to stop the grin from spreading across your cheeks. For a moment, you found it impossible to tear your eyes away from his, noticing how similar they were to Buddy’s. The pale blue, almost grey iris’ flashed with joy and the corners of his eyes crinkled as he smiled. With a shake of your head, you managed to look away, staring back down at the papers.

“Let’s go, my first patient is gonna be here in 20 minutes and you need to get this little guy home.” You stepped back from the bench, reaching for a cabinet and pulling out a few bottles of medication. “Just some stuff for the pain - put this in his food every morning and night, and this one is just once a day.”

Bucky took the medication from you, attaching the leash to Buddy’s new collar. You walked out to the car park with them, walking at Buddy’s pace.

“I’m probably gonna call you,” he stated, “I don’t know the first thing about taking care of a dog.”

“Well, good thing your neighbour is a vet,” you chuckled. “You can drop by anytime, Buck.”

He nodded, gently lifting Buddy in the passenger seat of his car which was covered in a mountain of blankets.

“Look, I wanted to say thank you–”

“James, you don’t have t–”

“No, I want to. I don’t know how I would've handled it if you weren’t here the other night - if he– if he’d died, I–” He cut himself off, letting out a quiet sigh and running a hand through his hair. “Just, thank you.”

“It’s not a problem,” you smiled, placing a hand on his shoulder. His own non-bionic hand lifted to cover yours and you felt a shiver run down your spine at the warmth. “It’s always nice to get to know your neighbours.” you chuckled.

A laugh rumbled through his chest and he stepped away, walking around to the other side of the car and greeting the animal inside with an affectionate pat.

“I’ll see you soon!” he said, before closing the door.

With that, he was off, pulling away from the clinic with a smile on his face as you watched the car drive away. It was only seconds later that a car door slammed behind you, and your head whipped around in confusion.

Emily was sauntering towards you, a cheeky smile on her face.

“How long have you been there?” you asked, shocked by her sudden appearance.

“About 10 minutes - I was planning on getting some reading done before my shift,” she lifted a textbook to show you, “but that exchange was far more interesting.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” you confirmed, turning on your heel and walking back towards the clinic.

“Oh, don’t play dumb - that little shoulder touch? His hand on yours? God, you both personified the heart-eyes emoji,” she sassed, following quickly after you.

“Ok, you have no idea what you’re talking about.” You tried to wipe the smile off your face, still facing away from her.

“Oh my god, you like him,” she mumbled.

“No, I don’t - I was just helping him out - he had an injured dog, I’m a vet.”

“You’re seriously not gonna admit it.”

“There’s nothing to admit!” You looked over at her standing behind the reception desk a smirk still plastered on her face as she held up her hands in surrender.

“Whatever you say,” she chuckled.

You sighed, storming back into one of the examination rooms to prepare for your first patient - a regular. The owner had 3 pugs - Basil, Lulu, and Reggie - and they were always getting into trouble. You knew as soon as they arrived because you could hear the cacophonous parade of paws on the tiled floor as they all bolted through the door, excitedly jumping up and down at your feet.

Needless to say, you managed to suppress the thoughts of your neighbour for the remainder of your shift.

A Week Passes

“Hey, Terminator, you coming or what?” Sam was standing in Bucky’s kitchen, pulling a box of leftover pizza from the fridge and helping himself to a slice.

“Yeah, just gotta feed Buddy,” Bucky murmured, strolling into the lounge room. “Did you see where he we–” Bucky stopped short when he caught sight of the open door, his eyes flickering over to Sam, filled with panic. “You left the door open.”

Am slowly turned to look at the open door, mouth open in mid-bite panic. “Shit,” he mumbled.

Bucky immediately burst into action, speeding towards the door and looking down the hall. “I swear to god, Wilson, I have had this dog for a week. I thought it was going well - he warmed up to me, stopped peeing inside, he’s taking his meds, moving better - and you show up, and suddenly I’ve misplaced him.” he ranted, speeding a few steps ahead of Sam, who was still holding a slice of pizza and had started calling out Buddy’s name. “What am I gonna tell y/n? She’s gonna hate me.”

“Dude, chill out, we’ll find your dog,” Sam groaned, looking behind him to the other end of the hall, only to bump straight into a frozen Bucky.

They had just rounded a corner, and Bucky saw something that made him come to an abrupt halt. Sam turned his attention to what Bucky was looking at and breathed a sigh of relief when he saw Buddy, his paws resting on the legs of a crouched woman in medical scrubs.

“Y/n,” Bucky breathed, the name was filled with relief and surprise, and Sam immediately raised an eyebrow. He’d heard about you, the neighbour who saved Buddy and convinced Bucky to adopt him, but he hadn’t heard Bucky say your name like that. He watched his friend rush forward, falling onto his knees as his dog jumped excitedly from her to him.

“I see you’re doing a good job of keeping an eye on him,” she chuckled, scratching the dog’s back.

“That idiot left the door open,” Bucky grumbled, pointing back at Sam. “I left the room for one second an–”

“It’s okay, James,” she chuckled, standing up and brushing off her legs. “He was sitting outside my door, apparently wanted to see me. I’m Y/n, by the way.” she stuck a hand out for Sam to shake and he smiled, introducing himself.

“Cyborg over there has mentioned you once or twice,” he smiled, noticing how her eyes flickered down to her shoes, a blush rising on her neck. He felt Bucky’s elbow press into his side and shot him a cheeky wink.  “Thanks for convincing him to get Buddy, he’s been far less grumpy for the past week - but maybe that’s not the dog.” Sam slyly questioned, raising a cheeky eyebrow.

“AlrIGHt that’s enough, we’ll leave you alone, sorry about Buddy,” he rushed out, grabbing Sam’s shoulder and trying to pull him away from you.

You chuckled lightly at this, shaking off Sam’s remark.

Sam didn’t seem to be having any of it though - he wrestled his way out of Bucky’s grip and turned back to you. “You look like you’ve just finished a shift, you should come out with us! We were gonna go to the Mexican place around the corner - we can eat outside, we’ll bring Buddy, it’ll be great.”

“Yeah, I just got off work, but I couldn’t intrude–”

“No! You wouldn’t be intruding, come on, it’ll be fun.” Sam tried to convince. “Music, food, a few drinks.”

Sam watched as your eyes travelled over to Bucky, a silent question in them. Generally, you wouldn’t just randomly go out for dinner with a group of people you hardly know, let alone superheroes, but you were so hungry, and the thought of having to cook when you got inside made you want to die. Finally, you turned back to Sam, “Just let me get changed.”

Sam cheered in support as hse unlocked her door and disappeared inside, only to be greeted with a punch to the shoulder when the door closed behind her.

“What the hell was that, punk?” Bucky asked, staring anxiously at the door.

“Ok, I just did you a favour - you should see the way she was looking at you, not to mention the way you were looking at her - It’s like a goddamn middle-school disco up in here.”

“I’m going to kill you. Go get Buddy’s leash.”

“You aren’t denying it!” Sam whisper-yelled, turning back towards Bucky’s apartment. “You’re in love!”

If Bucky had something to throw at the back of Sam’s retreating head, he would have.

Part Four

Tags:

Permanent Tags: @srgtsprout @redstarstan @just-add-butter @wildefire @dewy-biitch @emilia-dawn @comfortablenihilist @averyrogers83 @kittykat101ary @chameerah @obliviousocietea @vodkasindream @ciarawriitesmarvel @lauxeyson @mylovelymarvel @breezy1415 @xxashy999xx @moroiboy @miniwroetofreezymd @feelmyroarrrr @ellaisbutteredtoast @barnesbuucky @black-shad0w-w0lf @shelteredheart @fridolf-arach @missavengeer @winters-beauty @burningthroughmybones @theglowstickofdestiny @gotov-otvechat @o0justyouraveragefangirl0o @silverbvcky @petals-sunwards @stormbreaver @movie-dates-and-choccy-shakes

Tags for Bucky: @cryobucky17 @ailynalonso15 @ria132love @stan-by-me @jitterbuck @loricameback @sebbystangirl @justawildmarebearmcrbvbfob @rodkrake @benedictcumbirbatch @imshalida @ablogbypeteparker @xi-i-i-whatsyouremergency @impalatobakerstreet @freelittlearcher @2s0uls @spaniardseattleite @have-aheart @nerdgirljen

Tags for ‘Buddy’: @ablogbypeteparker @justmesadgirl @janeyboo @beezyg @buffy-morgendorffer-01 @wowkenobi @me-a-hopeless-romantic @mymourningtea @winchester- gospels-67 @bishopl @wrdro @jenpalmer @fronckie @littlemsrantsalot @guir16

[trickeyarchangel]

Reaction to Ep 1 of RWBY Volume 6

I’m late to the RWBY party because college is kicking my ass like how Yang kicked that manticore grimm’s ass but hey! Better late than never, I always say.

So before I start going into the details, this is a general summary of my reaction to both episodes:

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

Okay. Now on to my thoughts on the episode [WARNING: It’s a long post because I have a lot to share]

((Spoilers for Episode 1 of Volume 6 of RWBY below!))

RWBY Volume 6, Chapter 1: Argus Limited

So before I start, let me just start with just...

OH MY GOD

Guys. The fight scene was A-MA-ZING! 

Compared to the fight scenes of Vol. 5, it has improved so much. And also, the narrative flow and overall pacing of the episode was very nice. So mad props to everyone in the CRWBY - the animators and the writers! I’m so proud!

Also... the new opening theme? Love it. LOve it. LOVE IT! I legit can’t wait for the full song to be released, guys. Also, the animation of the new opening sequence? So good. It gave me the WhiteRose cuties and RenNora being sweeties on a bench. I am a simple woman - that made me grin so wide. Although I am very worried about Qrow now. Those Grimm arms grabbing him and pulling him into the dark??? Bad luck druncle may be in danger this volume OR HE COULD DIE AND I’M NOT READY FOR THAT  and I am just...bracing myself for the worst. The story is getting darker and with that comes the reality that characters will die and I’ve made the mistake of becoming super attached to Qrow and he’s literally one of the top characters that could die very soon. I am not ready.

Now to the actual episode content (bullet-ed this part to organize everything since I tend to scatter my thoughts when it comes to reactions):

I like how they started with a snippet of the train fight. It really drew me in and got my heart pumping. Literally after that, I was just glued to the screen of my laptop. It’s a fine way to capture the audience’s attention and drag them back into the world of Remnant.

Premium Team RWBY and JNR dynamic content. Literally, it made my heart soar to see everyone just...being happy and interacting with each other.It gave me the Vol. 1 + 2 vibes. Especially Yang and Ruby’s little moment. After all the dark emotions that Yang was flooded with last volume, it is such a nice breath of air to see her being so bombastic and energetic with Ruby, who I am sure is very VERY happy to see her sister happy again.

Speaking of Yang, while it is nice to see her act all gung-ho a la early RWBY volumes again, I am also very pleased with the writers’ choice to keep the hurt she still has over Blake leaving after Beacon’s fall. Them showing that she and Blake’s relationship isn’t automatically “back to normal” really keeps the relationships believable. After the trauma Yang’s been through (losing her arm, Blake leaving, the crap with Raven), it makes sense that she’s become more cautious socially. Obviously, she’s (somewhat) forgiven Blake, but their bond is still healing and I am very interested to see that play out.

Another thing I loved was seeing Blake’s development as a character. Her scene with Sun, in particular, is a highlight for me. Sun and her’s relationship the past volume was one that I didn’t quite enjoy, mainly because Sun was sort of Blake’s emotional punching bag. So this moment, with Sun willing to let her go now since she doesn’t “need him” to continue on now because she has her team with her (AND BLAKE APPRECIATING HIS HELP and kissing his cheek [BLACKSUN - HELL YEAH] ), god, I loved it.

Also: SUN FINALLY GOING BACK TO HIS TEAM AND ACKNOWLEDGING THAT HIM BEING AWAY FROM THEM IS A “BAD TEAM LEADER” THING. God. FInally. So glad the writers mentioned that. So. Glad.

And Neptune. Good to see him again. A little disappointed that he didn’t have a moment with Weiss (and very disappointed that he flirted with Ilia). Are he and Weiss even still a thing? RWBY writers, please tell me. I would like that cleared up please.

Honorable mention: Ilia. Hearing that Ghira is starting a new Faunus movement and that she will be joining it (and just getting a second chance) made me smile so wide.

Her and Blake hugging was literally cavities inducing.

 I already mentioned the fighting scene and its amazing-ness. So I will gloss over that. But I will mention:

TEAM RWBY BACK TOGETHER AGAIN

QROW AND RUBY DOUBLE-TEAMING WITH THEIR SCYTHES

JAUNE’S SEMBLANCE LITERALLY BEING A BUFF TO OTHER SEMBLANCES (Jaune’s a Support/Healer. I love that)

BEAUTIFUL ENVIRONMENT (The snow. The trees. Hell, even the G R I M M)

Also, Ozpin being super secretive even though he promised the group that there wouldn’t be anymore “half-truths” and “secrets”? I love you, Ozpin. You are cool as ice. But, it’s not exactly a good idea to keep things from the people that you want on your side to save the world. 

I’m fully expecting the next episode to be the one where he gets called out on his secretive nature. (I’ve seen clips of what goes down *because spoilers are sometimes untagged in the rwby tag :( * so I’m pretty sure that’s what’ll happen.

Double also: M A R I A     C A L A V E R A

WHO are you!? 

What is with your eyes? Why are they mechanical?

My current theory is that she had silver eyes  but she lost them (or she’s hiding them?). This is based on that segment in the new opening sequence where the camera zooms in on one of her mech-eyes and then fading into Ruby where the camera then zooms into one of her eyes - pretty much placing a central focus on her mysterious OP GRIMM SLAYING silver eyes. It kind of gives off that feeling that Maria and Ruby have that in common.

Also I love that her design is of Mexican inspiration. She’s amazing. I love her. I can’t wait to find out more about her!

Aaaaand that’s about it...

In summary:

SO MUCH HYPE FOR THIS VOLUME!!

Seriously, I am so proud of Miles, Kerry, and the CRWBY. The animation, the story pacing - it’s improved so much. I just want to shower them all with praise, because they’ve done such a phenomenal job.

I’m not a FIRST member (I’m a broke Filipino college student), so I’ll have to wait until Episode 2 is made available to the public to find out what awaits Team RWBY.

I’m sad that they had to separate from Jaune, Ren and Nora, but, god, I know that we’ll see them again... I’ll still miss them though. I’ve gotten really attached to the them the past few volumes. They’ve grown so much (especially Jaune) and I am just...so proud of these guys. And I’m sure Pyrrha is proud of them too (especially Jaune).

So far my predictions/expectations for this volume are:

We will definitely be learning more about Ozpin’s past this volume. The new opening sequence literally shows off some mysterious blonde lady (who kind of looks like Glynda) standing in front of a huge statue that looks a lot like Ozpin (or at least one of his past selves - which, some, were also shown in the opening sequence). So I am E X C I T E D to learn more lore behind Mr. Body Hopper.

I also am expecting a majority of the conflict being between Oz and Team RWBY and JNR. I also have a feeling that Oscar and Ozpin will be fighting with each other too. This is mostly based on the one scene all the way back in Volume 1 with Blake and her “Man with Two Souls” book where she literally mentioned that the two souls “fought for control”.

We already saw a hint, or at least a possibility, to this with Oscar emphasizing to Ozpin that he’s staying in control before joining the Manticore Grimm fight on the train.

Also based on the opening (The hooded figure with Roman’s bowler hat flying past them with a background of people holding pink umbrellas in the background - that segment, specifically):

Cinder’s alive. I am willing to bet my life on it. I doubt Miles and Kerry are just going to kill her off after she had so much build up from regaining her strength after the “Silver Eyes Encounter” with Ruby back during the Fall of Beacon. She’s alive and she’s gonna hunt down Ruby. 

N E O possibly may appear. (God I hope she does.) I really hope she does. I want to see her. Especially to see how she is dealing with the aftermath of losing Roman.

I also have a theory that she is probably going her own path at this point and that she is hunting down Cinder. From how Neo and Roman fought together ( how seamless and fluid their battle dynamic was), she and him were close. If anything, I believe she would blame Cinder for Roman’s death - after all it was very much obvious that Roman was practically forced into working alongside Cinder (sort of like how Adam was when he and Cinder first crossed paths).

I also believe Neo blames Ruby too for Roman’s demise. If Ruby hadn’t hit the button that opened Neo’s parasol that sent her flying away, Neo could’ve stayed with Roman and pretty much act as his escape route (as she has done before); she could’ve protected him. And had Ruby not done that, Roman probably wouldn’t have been so angry that he attracted one Griffon Grimm to, well, eat him...

I am so excited for what’s ahead for the rest of Volume 6. 10/10 CRWBY! Rooster Teeth, you really impressed me this time. (Now let’s see if this hype will last for the entire duration of the volume...)

[ka-star]

Thoughts and personal opinion on GN Taako’s design

Forewarning; this post is going to cover a topic that I had thought has died off a while ago, but I’ve come across a post that bring it back up again. I want to be clear; this is my own personal opinion on the issue and I am not saying I’m going to be right or wrong, but rather I’m going to go over what I found and show some examples of both sides to the augment. Anything I said should not be taken as truth but simply as my take on the topic and I only wish that anyone that reads this looks up the information themselves and comes to their own conclusion.

If there was one thing that kept coming up over and over again during the wait for the TAZ graphic novel, it would be the designs for the three main characters, or rather, it would be the design that was picked for Taako. Yes, I’m talking about the fact that he has blue (or at least bluish skin) in the book. The reason I’m bringing this up is due to a post I found while browsing the TAZ tag on here today. There are still some people that feel that the design choice is anti-Semitic, and that it’s something that still needs to be ‘fixed’.

I will start with this; I can see why some people might think this. I have heard of idea of Jews being depicted with blue skin and in a negative light. I’ve heard of this, but I’ve been having trouble finding a reliable source to it. I most I could find was a Reddit post about the same topic, with some links to Twitter from people that either supported it or were against it.

Click here for that post.

While I was looking through the posts and what people thought, I wanted to keep a few things in mind. One was which was the type of people this was bothering. Again, I can see why a Jewish person might feel uneasy about this, but as I read through I noticed how most of the people being on the side against it tended to be young, around 15 to 18, at least the ones that would have that information on their Twitter or Tumblr. Some were a little older, but most of the time it was around those ages. Another thing I noticed was the use of images of green witches (with pointy hats, noses, etc) as proof the argument, along with the original claim of ‘blue skin = anti-Semitic”.

Let me slow this down for a second, because there are other factors that are not being talked about here that I feel need to be brought up.

Rarely, if ever, do any of this post against this topic talk about the fact that Taako has been described as a High Elf (or just Elf in the GN), and if you were to google High Elves from Dungeons and Dragons you would see that they are normally shown to have ‘pointy’ features; nose, ears, chin, etc. Some don’t, but most of the artwork I’ve seen of them from D&D do.

Taako is a Wizard, and like many other fantasy characters in other fantasy stories, you will find wizards depicted with robes and pointed hats. It’s just a classic image that is not limited to just witches.

Okay, so what about skin color? That is where things get tricky, because much like the topic about whether Taako’s skin should be blue, there was an even hotter discussion about whether or not he should have been drawn with brown skin. I’m sure some of you will know what I’m talking about here, because it is still something a lot of fans will say they wish we got. Having Taako with brown colored skin played into the idea that he would then be seen as a Latino character, and that, much like the blue skin, caused some controversy.

The reasons for that was because of his name and because of some of his character traits. Taako’s name is, well, based on tacos, the Mexican food (which was picked as a joke from Justin long before the McElroys realized TAZ was going to take off, and he never intended any harm in it). The second point (and this is more troublesome), is the fact that Taako is known to loot money, either from dead bodies or trick it out of other characters. If he was depicted to look like a Latino character, some felt that would reflect badly on actual Latinos, at least that’s what I’ve read.

I really need to go back to the D&D element here and remind some people of something; when you play D&D, it would be stupid to NOT loot the dead bodies of enemies you kill, or not to trick someone out of some gold. Depending on the character you are playing, that may be part of their character, and there may be a good reason for it. I bring this up because I think a lot of the people that spoke out about this haven’t played D&D, or at the every least forget that is what the McElroys were doing.

So we have the final design for GN Taako with bluish skin, and we’re back to where I started with this post, only this time is focused on it being an anti-Semitic thing and nothing to do with Latinos. I also want to bring up, again, that most of the people I’ve found that were against this were around the ages of 15 to early 20s, and the possibility that these people may not even play D&D and not know about what High Elf features look like.

So, what is my take on all of this? I feel like the people saying that the look for GN Taako is anti-Semitic are not counting the other factors I just mentioned, or maybe they choose not to at all. I think they may be hyper focusing on one thing when in reality it’s simply a coincident, and they are over exaggerating something that I don’t think a lot of fans would have even thought of in the first place. It’s overblown, is what I’m saying. And frankly, the fact that a lot of these people are the ages I’ve mentioned tells me they’re letting their own emotions get the best of them, and not thinking more rationally on the why, and doing their own research and coming to their own conclusion. They’re looking for a reason to hate something when there very well may not be anything worth hating.

And if some of you reading this didn’t already know, yes, there are such things as blue skin elves in D&D.

In the end, it feels all like a gray area to me; if it does bother some people, okay. I get it; but don’t be the sort of person that focuses so much on just one facet that you lose the bigger picture. We have enough of that on the internet as it is.

[lifesruiner]

There’s nothing holding me back II

Well, I did that for Halloween party but since I am the worst I am posting it just now bc I got too lazy during halloween, you can find the first part here 

Hope you like it! <3

-Why did you tell them that you two are engaged? -Gaston asked confused once they got to their home 

-To let those losers very clear I am off the market so they won’t even try anything on me -Ambar answered uninterested and Matteo chuckled knowing that there was more reasons, but that was Ambar’s problem 

-But are we really letting them stay in the town? -Jazmin asked again with that disgusted expression 

-I said yes, what is your problem with them? -Matteo asked her serious 

-They smell like wet dogs -She repplyed making him roll his eyes 

-And we smell like dead dogs to them, so your point is? -He said standing closer to her, Jazmin was one of the few people that could make Matteo lost it, so she just lifted her hands a little bit and shook her head in surrender 

-Wow, you are very defensive about that pack -Ambar smiled cold to him, and he prepared himself to some rash comment -Don’t you tell me you got caugh on one of them? -She said with fake pitty on her voice and took his chin 

-Don’t be the dick you always are, this is strategy -He said shrugging her off and sitting in front of all -Look, we’ve been here for a long time now and other poeple is going to come after us sooner or later, so a werewolf pack having our back doesn’t sound awful 

-I think Matteo is right, plus they seemed chill -Ramiro said standing and placing a supportive hand on Matteo’s back 

-You know I’m with you till the end of the line -Gastón said resting in one of their big couches 

-Cool then, I don’t care about the rest of you losers so I’m out -Matteo said walking of their house and no one said nothing else, that was typical Matteo, he cared only about him, and a little bit Gastón, but mostly himself 

He was walking towards a part at the top of a little hill, it was very hide and hard to reachh but he could do it in just one jump, it was his special spot there, he could saw and hear everything that was happening in the city but he could also spaced out everytime he needed, and in that moment he really needed but when he was approaching there he felt that bold of happiness he felt that morning but he had no idea why so he rushed towards his place when he saw her, the little brunette werewolf, Luna, he remembered her name, he thought it was kind of poetic a werewolf named Luna, he remembered how there was this energy around her that made him feel warm and how her eyes made him feel peacefull, and how she made him feel, when he didn’t even remembered the last time he felt 

-I know you are there Matteo -She said calm not taking her sight out off the town panorama 

-Great senses cucciola -He approched her and sat by her side 

-I could smell you from from ten miles apart -She said and it made him realized something, he didn’t feel her smell, not that afternoon, not when he was approaching her, he felt her, yes, but her werewolf smell wasn’t there 

-Dead smell, sure -He said with fake amusement -What is doing a lonely cucciola on my spot this late at night? 

-I didn’t know this was your spot, I just was walking amesly and got here, but I can go -She said standing up but Matteo hold her by the wrist 

-Don’t go, you can stay if you want -If Luna would known Matteo better she could say that his voice was shaking, she looked at him for a couple of seconds that seemed like an ethernity and then sat back next to him -You are warm -He said shocked 

-Yes, we always are -She said amused, but what she didn’t know is that Matteo never felt warm

-Yeah sure -He dished the subject like it was not big deal- But you didn’t answer me, what brings you here? You are very far from where you are staying 

-How do you know where I am staying? -She smirked 

-I know everything that happens in this town -He smirked back and she thanked to be sat because her knees became jelly-So? What brings you here? 

-I... I actually don’t know -She confessed - I was walking aimless and then next thing I knew I was standing here watching the town in its whole splendor -She was looking at the panorama but a little chuckle made her turn her head -What? What is so funny? 

-You ending up here the same way I did, and no one else has been here before

-Not even your fiancé?-Luna asked with a litle bittering on her tongue 

-You mean Ambar? -He asked between laughter and she nodded without looking at him -She is not my fiancé 

-Then why did she said that? -Luna turned her head to look at him again, and damn, those big puppy eyes were doing something to Matteo 

-She says that to every person she could potentialy like so they would step back -He shrugged like it was nothing but Luna had a big shocked expression on her face -I think it’s the big puppy one, Simon is the name of your alfa?-He answered guessing that was the thing she was going to ask 

-Yes, he is, but... Did she like Simon? -she was confused, she merely talked to him 

-I guess, I am not completely sure, but I would bet on him, why? are you two together? -He asked serious 

-What? Ugh, no! gross, he is like a brother to me -She said and a little grin appeared on his face 

-Oh, okay good luck, he’s going to need it with a girl like Ambar -He laughed and for the first time he saw her giggle, the moon has nothing to do on her smile, it was the brigthest he has seen in all his life -Your smile is so cute 

-Thank you -She said with a shy smile and looked at her hands, they were covered by a silence that wasn’t awkward, but he felt the need to talk 

-Want to see something cool about this particular spot? 

-Sure -Luna answered and Matteo moved closer to her, making her freeze on her spot nervous and he could felt it 

-Relax, just close your eyes -She stayed still -I am not going to suck  your blood -He rolled his eyes and she didn’t know what, but something about himself made her trust, so she did as he told her -Focus, focus where the wind is coming from, focus where is it going -She did it and inmediatly was overwhelmed by the things she was feeling, she hadn’t felt that way since the first full moon she experienced after turning a werewolf and had to rush to open her eyes afraid of transform herself any second 

-What the hell was that? -She asked excited 

-Is cool right? -He said witha big grin on his face 

-Cool? I thought I was going to lose myself any minute and rip your head off -Matteo felt how she was trying to control her breathing 

-Well, I know at first is a little overwhleming, but once you get to managed it, you can hear and sense everything in this town, aslo look -He said pointing at the town panorama- You have a clear view of everything that happens in every street 

-You know, that is definetely creepy -She joked and he let a little chuckle out 

-It is if you use it for creepy reasons 

-And I guess you only use it for the right reasons, am I wrong? -She said with a clear tone of teasing on her voice 

-Of course, I do everything for the right reasons -He shrugged not humble at all and both laughed 

-And those are? -She asked facing at him, they were really close but at that moment neither of them minded at all 

-Like avoiding a robbery, or helping an old lady to cross the street, or know when Roberto’s pizza is just out of the oven -He said with an smirk and Luna jumped on realization 

-Italian, SURE! How did I not realize that before? -She said hitting her forehead softly 

-What? -He asked with a confused smile on his face 

-I knew you weren’t from here, but I couldn’t realize from where, but now that you mentioned pizza I realized you are italian, am I right? -She asked enthusiastic and he couldn’t help the giggle he let out 

-Yes, I am italian, cucciola, and you are the cutest mexican I’ve ever met -He said getting his face even closer to her 

-You smell... -She managed to say and he stop approaching to her remembering the thing a werewolf told him some years ago “All vampires stink like dead” 

-Oh yeah, dead -He showed what could be described just like half a smile 

-Strawberries -She said interrupting him 

-What? -He asked amused 

-You smell like strawberries, all your friends do have kind of a smell like dead, but you smell like strawberries does, why? -She asked confused, he was facing her again and their faces were just milimeters away from each other

-I have no idea - He laughed- Also I have no idea why you don’t smell like anything, your friends do smell like wet dogs, but then you, nothing, the only thing that separate you from surprise me is that overwhleming feeling I get when I am close to you, I felt it this morning and I felt it again when I got here -While he was saying all that the space between their was closed enough to make their forehead together and their noses graze eachother 

-This is not going to end up well -She said breathing hard, without stop looking at his lips 

-I know, do you care? -He asked and she let out a deep sight and was the only lead he needed to take her head with one of his hands and puch their lips together, the kiss was rushed and deep, like they were needing that for a long time, even if they didn’t even know

They stayed till almost midnight, Luna left because she knew her pack would get worried and Matteo walked her close, they said goodbye with a little kiss and both separate ways with the big grins ever, when Matteo arrived to the manor he didn’t even bother to enter to the front door, so he just climbed to his bedroom, turn on a light and screamed finding his best friend on his bed 

-What the fuck dude? What are you doing in my bedroom with the lights off? Please tell me you weren’t playing with yourself -Matteo said covering his face with both hands 

-Of course not, I was waiting for you but you are so biased that you didn’t even feel I was here, and by your wet dog stink I can say you were with out new friends? -Gaston induced and Matteo just grinned again by the thought of Luna- And by that smile I can say it was the littlest green eyed one? -Gaston was Matteo’s best friend since he has memory, when Matteo had no one, he always had Gaston and the other way around, so Gastón knew Matteo perfectly and knew since the moment Matteo didn’t stop gazing that girl in the meeting that something was happening with her 

-Her name is Luna -Was the only thing Matteo said while taking his shirt off 

-Oh, so I am right something happened, tell me what base exactly? -Gastón asked and Matteo thrown his shirt at him knowing Gastón was joking -Okay, don’t tell me, you are a gentlement I get it, but you realize she is a werewolf and this is insane right? 

-I know -Matteo said throwing himself in the bed next to Gaston -But there’s something about her, since the moment I saw her... I knew dude, I knew there was something that I won’t get enough, and actually I don’t get what is the big deal about that, the big feud between werewolves and vampires is just nonsense, and I don’t care about that anymore, I felt something tonight, I felt something I never felt before and I don’t want to stop that feeling, not for now at least 

-Oh dude -Gastón said a little sight out that confused Matteo -We are so screwed 

-No, first of all I am your leader and I won’t let anything happen to this crew, this is my priority, but I am sure Luna is not a threat for that -Matteo said convinced and surprised how sure he was of someone he just met 

-I know, what I mean is that, after you left we talked and basically Ramiro said the blonde one was super cute, Delfi talked nonstop about the black haired one and I know that Ambar said that about being your fiancé because she liked the leader one and I can’t asure you she is not making out with him at this very moment -Gaston said and Matteo laughed amused, Ambar was really fast when she wanted something, so he won’t assure that neither -And the little one with glasses, I actually think she is adorable and I won’t mind talk to her -Gastón confesed and Matteo covered her face with his hands again 

-This is going to be a mess, right? -Matteo asked and Gastón only hummed an afirmation -We are so fuck up

-Buddy, you have no idea -Gastón said and both bursted in laughs, maybe that wasn’t something they planned at all to happen but Matteo was so happy that he couldn’t care less and Gastón was so excited to see the come out of all that, knowing the happy ending was possible 

[malecsecretsanta]

Merry Christmas, @forensicsisabelle!

The Happiest of Holidays

“Do you celebrate,” Magnus asks randomly one night while they are out walking around the city.

“Do I celebrate what?” Alec answers softly.

“Christmas,” Magnus answers while looking at the tree in Rockefeller Center.

“Oh, no, not really.  I mean the institute puts up a tree, but I think it’s just for appearances sake, not that we get very many mundanes or anyone else who would care. Do you?” Alec, suddenly really curious.

“I do and I don’t. When I was a boy Islam was the religion where I lived, but my mother wasn’t all the interested, especially because my step father was white. But I’ve dabbled in almost every religion. There’s something magical in every faith.  Maybe that’s why I’m drawn to Christmas and the decorations. But Chanukah is also a very beautiful holiday. I’m very fond of Yul and Winter solstice.  I adapt to the situation I’m in.”

“I’ve never really cared to be honest.  We are descended from angels, and angels belong to many religions.  I know that the institutes in various countries celebrate according to the region they are in. people who have ascended celebrate what they were born into. Werewolves don’t have rules like that, Vampires have that God issue, and Seelies go with the flow, they would probably really like the whole worshipping a tree thing.”

“People don’t worship trees Alexander, it’s just a way to decorate the holiday with joy and love”

“Yes well, it’s all the same to me really.”

“I’ll have to change that.”

A week later Magnus dragged Alec to the Hotel Du Mort in search of his Catholic son and his Jewish fledgling.

“Can’t we just have met at the institute? The downworlder counsel exists for a reason Magnus.”

“I highly doubt you created it to learn about religion.”

“Well no, but it would still work.”

“Come now, this will be fun, and if nothing else you can scoff and roll your eyes at Simon as you enjoy doing.”

“Fine, but I want it known I’m doing this out of duress.”

“I’m fine with that.”

The two are granted entrance into the Vampire den and climb the stairs to Raphael’s penthouse suite.

“Does it not occur to these people to fix the elevator?”

“They have super speed Alexander, an elevator is hardly necessary.”

“Not all of us have that you know.”

“You have runes, I have magic, it equals out.”

“Then why are we walking?”

“We’re in no rush sweetness. I’m just enjoying your company,” Magnus bats his lashes at his boyfriend.

Alec rolls his eyes extra dramatically. “Okay I get it, let’s just get there already.”

Simon greets them at the door when they arrive. “This is really cool of you to ask Magnus, Clary never really cared about Chanukah because it was always so close to Christmas.  I’m excited to tell you about it.”

“Simon, let them come in before you scare them niño.”

“Right sorry, come in.”

“So Simon, why are you here celebrating instead of with Maia?” Alec asked suspiciously.

“When Magnus suggested this I figured it was easier to come here.  My stuff is portable, a tree is not.”

“Oh, yeh, right.”

“Anyway, do you want something to drink? Eat? We prepared some traditional holiday dishes.”

“Dios Mio, I prepared, he went to the store!”

“It was a group effort really.”

Magnus looked upon his children fondly, Alec was wondering around the apartment aimlessly.

“Is Izzy coming to this little get together?” He asked absentmindedly.

“Maybe, if she finishes her patrol in a timely manner, I usually don’t expect her ‘til much later,” Raphael said softly.

“Oh, that makes sense.” Alec had slowly become more comfortable with the idea of Izzy being in a relationship with the clan leader.  He made her happy.  She made him far more personable; he’s sure she is the only reason this little holiday thing was even happening.”

“Shall we get started? I don’t want to keep my night children from their night.”

Magnus and Alec sat down on the couch while Simon flitted around gather various things.

“Okay this is a menorah, they used to have ones like it in the temple-“

“Temple?” Alec looked confused.

“Right ok, um, I didn’t think this was gonna be a history lesson.”

Magnus chuckled, “it’s okay, I’ll fill in the holes later, go on.”

“Great, okay so the Temple used to use there candle/oil holders. But the one for Chanukah is called a Chanukiah.  So there was a fight. The bad guys tried to conquer the Jews, but somehow the Jews the prevailed.  But the temple was desecrated, and there was only a little bit of oil left. Somehow it burned for eight days. Most people say that was miracle of Chanukah but really it was that we won against a greater larger foe.   Anyway. We celebrate by lighting candles each night for eight night, we have games and we eat oily food, like latkes which are potatoe pancakes and donuts.”

“ That was…a lot.” Alec was trying to prcess.

“Sorry, I get excited.  If you have specific questions let me know.”

“ I think Magnus can fill in the gaps.  So this is a holy day?”

“I mean it’s not like the New Year or Yom Kippur but it is important.”

“Gotcha, I think.”

“Wait ‘til you hear Raph’s story, you’ll be begging for more of my story!”

Raph came to the living area carrying drinks for everyone, blood cocktails for himself and Simon, a martini for magus and a beer for Alec.

“Isabelle tells me you like this kind.”

“I do, very much, thank you.”

Magnus gestured for Raphael to sit and begin his Christmas lesson.

“It still pains me to talk at length about this, but I will tell the basics, if that’s alright.”

“Of course gendhakan.”

If vampires could blush Raphael would be, as he always does when Magnus uses that term of endearment for him.

“Alright, so Christmas celebrates the birth of Jesus. Who we believe to be the son of…” Raphael gets choked up and points upward. “His mother had a baby without having sex; it’s called the Immaculate Conception.”

“Yeh, even though Mary was married and clearly had sex with her husband.”

Raphael smacked him upside the head. “You had your turn!”

Simon rubbed at his head and apologized.

“As I was saying, Catholics take Christmas a little more seriously than other parts of the religion. I remember going to mass with my family. I swear I could feel…him around me.  It kept me grounded while I was growing up.  I think the tree tradition is as old as Magnus here.  It evolved from pre-Christianity. But I believe now it’s a way to outwardly celebrate what we feel inside. I usually don’t have one, too painful, but Isabelle got a small one as a gift to me and who am I to say no to her.”

Alec smiled; it was very hard to say no to Izzy.

“Okay, so someone mentioned food?” Magnus said to break the silence.

Simon jumped up and sped over to the kitchen. He rushed back with plates of potato pancakes, jelly donuts, Bacalao Navideno (Mexican Christmas salted cod) and cinnamon bunuelos(fritters).

Alec looked at everything with wide eyed, grateful he had listened to Magnus when he said not to eat much that day.

“Everything looks amazing anakku.”

“Thank you papa.”

Magnus started making plates for himself and Alec.  Simon sat watching them eat with rapt attention.

“Simon, can you stop staring?” Alec pointed his fork at him.

“Sorry! I sometimes miss food, or the first taste of holiday foods you only have once a year.” Simon looked downcast.

Raphael put a comforting hand on his shoulder. He understood.

When Magnus and Alec had eaten more than their fair share of food, they got up to go.

“What will you do with the leftovers,” Alec asked curiously.

“I’m taking some to Maia, and Raph promised Izzy he’d save her some of everything. Don’t worry; it will get eaten by those who can.”

“Thank you both for this.  It was a lot of information but I think I understand the gist of everything.”

“Of course Alec, anytime.  I’m glad I had someone to share this with.”

Alec smiled genuinely at Simon, grateful that this pesky nerd had found a way into his life.

“Portal or walk my love?”

“I think a stroll is in order.  Gotta work off all this food.”

“There are certainly other ways,” Magnus winked at Alec.

“No, not in here!” Raphael threw his hands up and fled to the kitchen to clean up.

“Love you too my boy!”

Both men left sated and peaceful.  The walk home was brisk and calm.

“Thank you for arranging this. Don’t think I don’t know what you were doing by getting Raphael and me in the same room for a considerable amount of time.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Magnus smiled while playing with his ear cuff.

Alec stopped, pulled Magnus to him with the hand he was holding.  “I love you, thank you for always taking care of me even when I don’t know I need it.” Alec leaned down slightly and kissed Magnus on his nose, smiling at how cold it was. He placed his forehead on Magnus’s and they just breathed into each other.

“Tonight was perfect. Thank you for sharing it with me.”

“I want to share everything with you.”

“And I you cinta.”

Alec backed away and the two started walking again.  As they walked home they saw trees with lights and the menorahs in the windows of apartments above them.  Alec smiled a knowing smile, and he felt like maybe these holidays were something he could start doing, because with Magnus by his side, anything was possible.

Translations:

Nino: child in Spanish

Dios Mio: oh my god in Spanish

Gendhakan: sweetheart in Javanese

Anakku: my child in Javanese

Cinta: love in Indonesian

[moonraccoon-exe]

It was not an emotional struggle. It isn’t me.

It’s my country.

I’ll be adding a Keep Reading line, because here comes a rant on why I was (or am?) in shock and decided to take a breath for a moment. But do know, it’s not my mental health, I’m fine in that aspect. It’s just that today was tragedy for my country, and I am...well, sad about it.

I’ve been avoiding telling you guys where I’m from on a side for mere fun of leaving you on doubt, and on the other side, because I was scared of your reaction towards it. Scared of being rejected, and scared because I know that no matter if you stay a friend to me, your perception is changing anyway because that’s how society has gotten us to mentally process. So as soon as I told you, you’d tag; tag my skin color (and miserably fail), tag my accent (and half fail), tag my favorite food and games and everything, tag everything.

Not to say my country is currently one of the most hated upon. For the sole reason of the Class Bully speaking shit about us until turning us into the bad guy. The aggressive, the idiotic, the barbarian.

You have no idea how scared I’ve been at times to say where I’m from because of the reactions. Because I know I’ll immediately be pulled fifty steps below everyone else. Because I’ll feel that you see me as uncultured, with no education, like a cavernman, and so...hated upon.

But I’ve never been ashamed of my country.

Scared of your reactions, of course. But ashamed of my country? Nothing in the universe will achieve that until my country itself proves me it is what the rest of the world thinks it is. Which I highly doubt; to watch its people with my own eyes lets me know what kind of people we really are.

You’re probably wondering where all this speech comes from. To be honest, I would have liked to continue keeping it a secret; that way the silly game of keeping you on question would stay up, and I’d save all that fear of being tagged and despised.

But today I cannot not speak about my country.

I can’t wait until the shock passes and then copy-paste happy kaomojis into a post telling you I’m back and happily bouncing around, pretending nothing happened. It feels like the most hypocrite thing to do, to continue posting all my happy things without mentioning it once. Like it didn’t happen. Like it’s not happening.

Like I didn’t just lose hundreds of sisters and brothers.

My dearest and most beloved México has gone through a terrible earthquake earlier today Tuesday. Here where I live, earthquakes are strange to be sensed; we’re on very high ground so if the city trembles, we usually don’t feel it. If we do, it’s because it was bad down in the city.

Today I felt it here home. And I felt it bad. 

Which could only mean one thing: the city was being destroyed.

And it is destroyed.

September 19 is/was also the 32nd anniversary of the worst earthquake the city has ever had, and, while on a minor scale, it happened yet again. There’s a great quantity of buildings that are now but debris, rock and dust. The number of deaths does but increase with every second. A kindergarten collapsed, a whole block of apartments, the building 500 meters from where my brother was having a job interview.

And I am so brokenhearted. Terribly, terribly brokenhearted.

I feel, no jokes, like when my grandmother died. I still senselessly and against all logic hope it’s all a joke. That tomorrow I’ll wake up to the news having a big sign that says “Haha just kidding”. I was downtown just yesterday, and next time I go there there will be rocks where there used to be buildings. That had people and pets inside.

I feel...so sad. When I watch the news and I see all these people crying, and all the destruction like somebody dropped a bomb or like it’s warzone...my heart aches. You have close to no idea how desperately much I love my country, so to see its beautiful core, its very same heart in this state...broken, in ruins. It hurts. It’s almost a physical pain. It hurts more than any personal experience. Because this doesn’t involve only me, this involves all my people and my sisters and brothers, and...all the people I lost, even if not knowing their faces or names. The fact that we all lived here makes us family. And even if we weren’t family, we’re still human beings. And it hurts.

In the news, as I watched the disaster, live, I saw my people, like always when these things happen and when not too, helping each other. Not only professionals but civilians too having joined into rescue missions one second after the earthquake. It was...it is fantastic. It’s the most beautiful thing I’ve seen. Solidarity. Solidarity like only us mexicans know how to give.

And then I saw, live, the moment they rescued a person. Alive, breathing, conscious. Saved.

I saw, live, the moment people all kept quiet despite the paranoia, to listen, the moment they spotted where sounds came from, the moment they desperately but in an order I had never before seen my people do started digging out. And then the moment they brought her out, covered in dust, helped her onto a gurney. And the moment the crowd cheered.

Because they had saved a life.

Ohmygod, I feel terrible just remembering. It was both beautiful and terrific, one of the most beautiful and most terrific things I’ve witnessed, because unlike documentaries, this was happening while I was alive, while I exist, while I had people I love in there, this was far way beyond real, and it was past beyond overwhelming. I still don’t know how to feel. I just know it makes me cry and ache inside so, so much.

All day I was trembling and mentally paralized. I kept sewing because nothing else kept me entertained, and all the time I was waiting for something. For what? For the buildings to magically repair themselves so all people could walk out of them? For time to go back so they have time to escape? For the “Haha just kidding” sign on the news? Help from some gods? I don’t know.

I spent all day until just half an hour ago completely unable to contact my best friend. Where was he, if he was okay. I hated him with all my guts and entrails all day because he wasn’t responding anywhere. And I swore that I hated him so much, and I swore that if he didn’t answer soon I would stab him with a fork but wouldn’t want to kill him, because if I was hating him for something that was because I didn’t know if I could even kill him, or if some stupid ass piece of fucking rock had done it for me already.

Only a few moments after I typed that last entry apologizing for having to take a breath, I broke down. I think it was realizing as I typed that post that I was in shock what helped the shock be triggered, because I suddenly felt...like someone important had just died. I felt a void in my chest and like an internal punch to the lungs, and I had to bend down and go hold to a corner of my room, and I just continued to cry. I felt much more desperate than during the earthquake itself. So desperate, so desperate.

Thank the Astrals, after that I stopped trembling and felt much more calm, but not less sad.

Mi México lindo y querido, destroyed and suffering.

Southern states were already in literal ruins, have been for days now. They had a much bigger earthquake. And now the city, too.

Know that no matter what you think about my country or how you visualize it, I’m desperately in love with it, and it’s my biggest pride from above all things. So, like it happens when one sees the love of their life suffering, I’m currently in pain for the love of my life.

I believe I will be back to posting tomorrow or soon enough, because that’s how I know how to keep on; with good vibes and the spirit high on positive vibes. Not to say, on the selfish side, it’s a way to keep me...distracted. But do know, the pain inside isn’t fading, not entirely, in a good while. My México is destroyed, so am I. It’s in ruins, so am I. Always together, it and I. It bleeds, I bleed. It’s called loyalty. One of the things I’m proudest of about my country and its people.

I still have thousands of things to say, but I’ll keep it here for now. This is already too long and angsty.

If you read it this far, know that I’m both very embarrassed by knowing you know where I’m from and your vision of me has majorly changed even if we stay friends, and very proud of admiting it as well. And I’m very, enormously grateful that you took the time on worrying for this coon.

And I’m also profoundly touched inside. Horrified and proud, sad and happy. Overwhelmed. To the point I think I’m still in some sort of shock, even if I already cried most of it out. 

For the rest of the night, I’ll continue sewing because it keeps me calm, and send all my thoughts for the people that are living in a much bigger tragedy than mine. 

My city bleeds, and I ache with it. Because it’s part of me. Part of my system. And its pain is mine.

Today I lost hundreds, maybe thousands of sisters and brothers.

Today I have seen my concept of Life grow and change and turn into something much greater than before.

And today I do assure you that, just as people did 32 years ago, we will ache, and suffer, and scream, and cry, and it will take time,

But we will rise again.

We could do it back then, we can do it now.

The golden angel will fly again.

Thank you very much.  Whoever you are, I love you. 

Receive the tightest of hugs from this (currently) destroyed but strong mexican raccoon. 

I love you.