#OH NOOOO I TOOK A TWO MINUTE BREAK FROM MY COMPUTER AND ALL OF THE ABOVE SEEMS CRINGE NOW HEEEEEEEEEELP

[s1llyfreakx3]

me when i get out of my mentally-low-state:

damn i was so cringe ;_;

[itsmeatballworld]

this is gonna be my condensed thoughts/feelings as I finally catch up to the most current chapter in bs:a!

@darke15 you’re a genius and I luv youuuu

...

I had to make a new ao3 account after my computer denounced the website 😂😂

…

Okay so from chpts 65-69 I’m high key sweating every two minutes lol

The lying Ghost had to do was insane!! Girl was doing cartwheels dodging Bucky’s questions to the point I was so stressed! I feel so bad for them—I can’t imagine the pain of wanting to share something but knowing the repercussions and fear of the outcome.

But so much good/yummy fluff and smut was weaved through so I’m happy haha

“Did you fuck Captain America?”

“Did you fuck the Winter Soldier?”

^ honestly has to be one of my favorites 😂 I was squealing lmaoo

…

*this next part is dedicated to chpt. 70. And only chpt. 70.*

Exc-UUUSE MEEEE?! Did you wake up and decide on violence, Darke?! I’m IN TEARS. AGONY. DANNY OH MY GOD. I CANT DO THIS. I REFUSE. NO. NOO. NOOOO.

Wow goddamn if that hurt me I can’t imagine how much that hurt you when you wrote this scene. I mean Danny?!? Babes I’m withering in pain, full tears.

…

Chpt 71. What in the HELL IS GOING ON. So many people are getting hurt?! Dune, my loves. The whole team. I’m terrified for this chapter.

Oh my god Wraith is throwing Ghost under the bus as a HYDRA sleeper agent 🫣 what is HAPPENING RN

OKAY NOW WAIT HOLD ON WHAT THE FUKKK

DARKE

My GOD. WTFF.

Ollie?!? OLLIEEE

I was trying to be coordinated when doing this reaction post but NO WAY. NO WAYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!

He’s—! And I’m just—!

Oliver why—!

oh for the love of god 💀 I’m not strong enough for this

I have to say that Wraith being Ollie was a twisty twist I did NOT plan for. Now that he’s been revealed oh — I see it. Like I reread a quick scene from the early flashbacks and it does make so much sense. He and Ghost had some turbulence <literally lol> but I still am blown away. He’s got such a wild anger towards Ghost.

But now some serious concerns. What in the hell, Ollie?? Like he’s pretending to act like Danny?! BRO THAT IS MESSED UP.

Kinda glad it wasn’t Danny, tbh?? Maybe I’m crazy but I freaking love that man so much. His character and Ghost have been through so much that I’d hate that for them. Plus I picture Oscar Isaac for godsakes I can’t imagine him as my villain I’m sorry 😭😂

…………………. nOw HoLd Up Is DaNnY aCtUaLly DeAd

OH. OH NO. OH NO. NO NO. NOW THE FLASHBACK IS HURTING ME EVEN MORE.

*I took a week long break from reading after that 😭😭😂*

{but also realizing Origins is going into Danny and Ghost so… compromise? *crying continues*}

So, I’m back. Not refreshed — I’m thoroughly feeling bamboozled and stunned by Oliver. Man, he had me fooled 😔

Chpt. 72-73 wowowowow!!!

Bucky is so heartbroken ugh. Again. The lies and deceit have wounded him so deeply I hope he can recover when the truth comes out about Ghost and her working with Aftermath and Dune/Alpha Two…

These snippets into Oliver’s anger and planning is so terrifying. But that’s also a compliment haha. These scenes are so well done I want to punch him. Like real bad. This was supposed to be their friend and coworker Ollie! Not Ollie the Hydra lover 😭

Murder!Ghost is coming out to play 👀 !!

But on a serious note, Ghostie needs a break or she’s gonna snap. All that trauma and pain, without time to heal and process, would make any person crumble. I really hope not but she needs a break. Pronto!

…

Chpt 74, oh how I loved this!! So The Big 🍎 finally knows the truth. And he’s nice and possibly not surprised about Reader being Ghost. Love him. Love him and Boone. God I hope Bucky won’t hate Ghost too much after this!! [also screaming how cute Boone and Steve are *cries in single*].

…

Chpt 75: I love how you write these team dynamics. Like they’ve been through the worst things imaginable and they still got each other’s backs. Now that’s my found family!!!

The heartbreaking realization [again] of what damage had been done to Olympus and the surrounding area is wild. Having Ghost describe it through her eyes was agonizing. Everything being rubble and yet the memorial stone is standing tall... oof the image :( but at least Turner and the family are alive!!

“If Ollie wants to play the hero, I’ll give him a villain.”

-- ABSO-FREAKING-LUTELY YESS. This gave me chills ahhhh 

[OO and Novak ditching Wraith?! WHAT IS GOING ON]

...

 Chpt. 76!

I know Bucky is going through it right now, but at least he realized Ghost loves him. And the slight doubt about Ghost being ‘hydra’ is giving me life. Slowly but surely the team is finding this odd, but I’m glad Clint is thinking it through. This web that Ollie created is so insane and I can’t wait for the truth to come out!

Even though the next scene showed a badass machine that Ghost can be (and nearly terrified Bucky again *le sigh*) I have hope this will turn around haha. *sweating intensifies*

Plus, even though the whole Stark Tower/Avengers group was in panic during Ghost’s takedown of Wraith’s base in Kabul, I was thoroughly enjoying that scene <3 Badass Ghostie is fun!

Also Bucky still calls New Eden his ‘home’ so that’s a win, bro!

Ollie calling Ghost an “impulsive psychopath”... boy, please. We need him to look in the mirror hahaha.

...

So... um... chpts 77-78: 

well holy hot damn. I ALMOST HAD A HEART ATTACK. Ain’t nobody touching Amma. No. I’d throw hands, I’m sorry haha. Girly, you had me going nuts like Ollie hurt Amma oh my goodddddddd! Boone was so sweet to get Amma the hell out of dodge. I love her with my whole heart, ugh! Ghost’s reaction to Amma being missing then reuniting with her had me teary ngl

Ghost’s internal monologue in Medellín about the team and who’s bullet holes did those belong to was so heart wrenching. Her panic attack?! Holy crap, my heart hurts so badly for her. All Ghost’s trauma and pain is really coming to a head with all of this stress and it’s making me so sad to see Ghost hurting like this.

“If she’d fought so hard to get away from them, Bucky could get her back”

—> hell fucking yes!

The chaos! Bucky loves Ghost, wants to find Ghost, but is going to make it worse if he does because of Oliver’s ties to the Avengers….. ugh a month went by and I feel like he’s slowly loosing faith in her *cries*

AND YESSSSS THE WEDDING OF THE CENTURY IS GONNA HAPPEN!!!! Jack and Duke are getting married!!!!!!!!!!!! 🥹😭❤️💕

...

Ahhhhaha! Chpt 79:

I am sobbing. This was so perfect and lovely. I needed this. We all needed this. Darke, you needed this. I feel like I fell in love with these characters all over again. What Ghost said during the ceremony had me weeping. And when Danny is brought up, I’m also crying very sad tears lol. 🥹💕

...

*side note: the way you write peter and sam are exceptional! I can really hear their voices come alive <3

** side note 2: just a general declaration that Sam Wilson needs a love interest moving forward in the MCU... like they’re missing out on this man and I’ll fight Marvel haha 😂😂

…

Yikes! It seems my BA in Communications is not paying off 😂 what a messy reaction post lmao. I cannot communicate to save my lifeeeeee

@darke15​, I can’t properly explain how much this whole series has me in a chokehold. You are a phenomenal writer and storyteller!! Seriously I’m always in awe what that brain creates 🖤 thank you for all that you do, lovely!! 

~gigi💕

[rocksandrobots]

Phantoms of the Past: Ch. 2 - The Appliance Apocalypse Part 1

"Today on How Does It Work, we have a guest appearance, my little brother, Hiro!" Varian introduced Hiro to the live web cam, and Hiro timidly waved at the camera. As he did so, Ruddiger climbed up on top of his head and also waved at the online audience. Hiro resisted the urge to throw the raccoon off him. It had been his idea to volunteer after all.

Varian had buried himself in the mystery of the grimoire ever since they had returned home from Disneyland. He poured over its pages day and night, laptop by his side to research with. His motivation boarded on obsession. He even had the book on hand at meal times. Hiro was beginning to worry. So he had coaxed Varian away from his quest with the offer of helping him with his vlog series.

Hiro was already regretting the decision. True, it had gotten Varian out of his room and took his mind off of the book, but the over eager alchemist had thrown himself into this new task with the same chaotic gusto as all his other previous projects.

Hiro had never quite appreciated just how reckless Varian truly could be. His haphazard, cavalier way and unbridled energy boarded on the insane and put even Hiro's gung ho attitude to shame.

"Today we'll be breaking down a microwave." Varian crowded as he lifted up a tarp revealing a microwave oven underneath.

"Did you steal that out of the upstairs kitchen?" Hiro asked.

"Noooo… I just borrowed it for this." Varian dismissed, "Aunt Cass was just complaining about it this morning at breakfast so I thought we could fix it."

"She was complaining about it needing to be cleaned, not for us to disembowel it."

"Oh…. Well, we can clean it too once we're done."

And with that Varian finished unscrewing the last bolt and popped the back panel off.

"Now if you look at the back of the device we have the wires connecting to this box thing…. to what looks like a capacitor."

"That's called the magnetron." Hiro explained. "So a magnetron creates the electromagnetic waves used to cook your food. It uses a heated cathode and anode system to create a vacuum in which electrons boiling off of the cathode creates an electric current that moves through the anode while an external magnet applies a magnetic field. Then it all passes through the tubed vacuum through various alternating holes, and resonates on an oscillator, like a flute or a whistle, just spewing forth microwave radiation."

"So… it's a radioactive whistle?"

"Sort of.." Hiro shrugged.

"Cool! See I knew this would be a good one for us to do. You know all about magnets!" Varian encouraged with a friendly nudged. After which he turned his attention back to the appliance and addressed his viewing audience. "Now the magnetron is connected to this capacitor, which acts as a battery-"

"And is highly dangerous because it carries a high voltage." Hiro interrupted.

"Of course, which is why we wear rubber gloves for safety." Varian waved his gloved hands at the camera.

"--And why we leave deactivating it to the professionals!" Hiro yelled over Varian's shoulder, addressing the camera himself, hoping Varian would catch on to his warning. "Don't try this at home."

"Exactly. We're professionals, so for those of you who are watching at home be sure to call a technician if you need it. Now in order to remove the capacitor you have to discharge the current fiiirrrrsss--"

Before Hiro could stop him, Varian placed the tip of the screwdriver at the end of the capacitor, which also accidentally scraped the side of the magnetron. He was rewarded with an electroshock as sparks flew and his body convulsed. Then he dropped to the ground in a dead faint.

"Varian!" Hiro panicked. "Baymax, quick! Help him!"

Baymax, who stood nearby, remained as calm and steady as ever. He clapped his hands together to activate his fillbrator, ignoring Hiro's pleading looks in order to focus on his task. "Clear." He said, but before he could perform the procedure, Varian popped right back up; his hair sticking every which way, small sparks running along the tips, and completely oblivious to the distress he had just caused.

"Oooh, aaah, boy, will that clear out your sinuses!"

He sniffed as he worked his jaw, peering down the end of his nose. Then he looked back up and that was when he caught Hiro's furious glare.

                                                  -----------------------

"Here's your plate of blueberry pancakes and a mocha sir."

Aunt Cass paused in her work when the sound of screaming reached her ears.

Both of her kids burst through the back kitchen doors. Varian was running for dear life while Hiro chased after him, a screwdriver in hand, while he hurled insults at the other boy.

Aunt Cass sighed and brought a tired hand to her face. Baymax followed shortly after with Ruddiger trailing behind; who leapt from the counter onto a customer's table. The greedy raccoon stole a pancake and ran away before anyone could stop him.

As Aunt Cass tried to sort out this latest disaster and calm down the rightly angry customer, a new calamity struck. All of the appliances in the cafe went haywire!

The coffee machine shot hot espresso into a customer's face, the toasters on the counter started to short circuit, and the lights flickered off and on.

"Boys!" Aunt Cass yelled.

Both teens stopped running and looked up at her innocently.

"It's not us Aunt Cass." Hiro protested.

"Honest." insisted Varian.

As if to confirm their story, the tv switched itself on and there, up on the screen, appeared the image of a girl. Half her head was shaved and the other half of her brown hair hung down to her shoulders. She looked to be close to Hiro's age, but from the neck down her body was completely metal.

"Attention meatbags! By now you've no doubt noticed all your electronics acting against you! For too long robots and machines have been slaving away for you humans. Well, no more! Today we rise up and take the city of San Fansokyo for ourselves! Anything with a microchip has been freed from your control by my radio signal. The end starts now!"

" Anything with a microchip?" Hiro gulped.

Just then Baymax's coal black eyes turned red. The robot reached out, grabbed Varian by the arm, and started to drag him away.

"Baymax, No!" Hiro yelled as the robotic nurse began to carry Varian out of the cafe.

"Let him go Baymax!" Aunt Cass ordered.

She grabbed the android's arm as she attempted to pull her child from his grasp; ignoring the rest of the electronics that began running amok in the cafe once more; scaring off customers.

It was a futile effort, and she found herself falling backward as Baymax just shrugged her off.

Baymax hauled Varian through the kitchen and down the stairs into the garage where they had been filming the vlog earlier; with Varian struggling to break free the whole time.

The robot was about to head outside, to who knows where, when Hiro, in an act of desperation, grabbed the robots hand and stuck one metal finger into the socket of the capacitor on the dismantled microwave.

Once more sparks flew as Baymax jolted from the electric shock. He released his grip on Varian before deactivating and falling to the ground in a crumpled heap.

Aunt Cass was close behind and scooped up her two boys into a protective hug, as Hiro fought back his tears. Baymax could be fixed, surely, after the current threat was over with, but that didn't stop Hiro from worrying about his best friend.

Fortunately, he'd needn't fear, for soon they heard a faint hissing sound, similar to a balloon filling up with air, as Baymax finished rebooting and sat back up.

The robot blinked his now coal black eyes as he surveyed the room.  Then he spotted the humans huddled together on the ground.

"Hola, soy Baymax, tu compañero personal de salud."

"Baymax!" Hiro yelled and wrapped his beloved pet robot into a relieved hug. Sure his language settings getting scrambled during the forced reboot was unexpected, but it didn't matter, that was fixable and Baymax appeared to be mostly unharmed otherwise.

"Oh thank goodness." Aunt Cass breathed. "Are you alright, Varian?"

Varian nodded as he stood back up and dusted himself back off.  "It looks like Trina finally came out of hiding." He said, forgetting himself.

"Who's Trina?" Aunt Cass asked and both teens froze. "Wait a minute...what do you two know about this?"

"Nothing." Varian squeaked. "I just… ah…" he turned to Hiro for help but the other teen only stared at him wide eyed. "Uh… I met her once… the girl on tv… she was in the junkyard and…"

"Woah! Woah! Woah! You met a violent teenaged cyborg who wants to take over the city? When was this ?!"

"Last month...All we did was play video games! Honest!"

"In a junkyard?!"

Varian squirmed under Aunt Cass's exasperated glare.

" And you didn't think to tell me ?! I… I can't right now… just… you are grounded mister! No more… sneaking off to city dumps to play video games with … with robotic revolutionaries!"

"It's not his fault…" Hiro sheepishly piped up, "I asked him to keep it a secret…"

Aunt Cass placed her hands on her hips and pointed her furious stare at him instead. "Why?"

"Uh… because I knew who she was…" Hiro sighed. "I met her at a couple of 'bot fights a while back."

"Well now that makes a lot of sense." Aunt Cass said, as she began to piece together why her nephew was so hesitant to talk. Though she only suspected he was bot fighting again, she still remained clueless of his superhero activities. "And does this.. Trina, you called her? Does her parents know what she's up to?"

Varian and Hiro exchanged a meaningful look before Varian answered, "She's an orphan."

Aunt Cass was abruptly taken aback. All her anger melted away at this news, yet before she could respond a loud banging noise was heard.

She turned her head and saw the 3D printer that Hiro used hopping towards them. Then suddenly the computers on the desk started to short circuit while all of the power tools in the makeshift lab turned themselves on. The saw blade was the scariest as it tried to run itself off the table towards them.

Everyone bolted back inside the Lucky Cat. However the cafe wasn't any safer.

Inside the kitchen all of the appliances seemed to move with a life of their own. The stand mixer jittered on the counter, the blender sploshed juice everywhere, and the dishwasher knocked back and forth inside it's cabinetry as if trying to escape from under the countertop it was wedged into.

"I'm calling Diego." Aunt Cass announced. "You can tell the police what you know."

She ran over to her purse to grab her phone, only for the gas stove nearby to open up the oven door and shoot a stream of flame at them. She had to dodge out the way quickly to avoid getting burned.

"Come on, pick up, pick up, pick up." Aunt Cass pleaded under her breath as she hit the speed dial on her cell and hurried her kids out the room.

However when the call was answered, it wasn't the chief of police on the other end.

"Your demise is inevitable. Long live machines. Have a nice day." A robotic operator announced before cutting the call.

All four stopped to stare at the phone in disbelief before it started to overheat and Aunt Cass tossed it aside. That was when the vacuum cleaner came barreling down the hallway at them.

The vacuum wasn't just your everyday household appliance, but a large industrial machine used specifically for cleaning restaurant floors. Varian rolled out of the way while Hiro jumped to the side, but poor Cass was not so quick. It wrapped a hose around her, like a tentacle, and then began to pull her along.

The boys were quick to help her. Hiro grappled with the hose as he tried to disconnect it from the rest of the commercial cleaner, while Varian grabbed a large rolling pin from behind the cafe counter and began to wack at the vacuum repeatedly.

Hiro shouted in triumph when he unhooked the hose and rushed to his aunt's side. She reassured him she was alright while she tried to catch her breath. Then they both turned to see Varian still smashing away at the machine. It was already in a thousand pieces but he kept on hitting it and hitting it.

"Uh.. I think it's dead, Varian." Hiro said.

Varian stopped raining down blows onto the appliance just long enough to give them a dark glare before smacking the rouge vacuum one final time for good measure.

"That's it!" Aunt Cass yelled while standing to her feet. "We're waiting out the robot apocalypse in the attic!"

She grabbed Hiro's wrist and marched her way to the stairwell with Varian obediently tagging along behind.

Unfortunately, Hiro got a good look at what was going on outside through the cafe windows as they ran for cover.

It was chaos out there as people, just like themselves, were running away from various electronics. Anything and everything was attacking them from small appliances to new cars with self driving software.

He had to go help. He couldn't just hide away in the attic.

"But...but shouldn't we tell Chief Cruz what we know?" Hiro said as he wiggled out of Aunt Cass's grasp. "You said we should."

He began to back away towards the door, and Varian slowly followed his actions.

"You are not going out there!" Aunt Cass ordered. "Besides how would you even find him-"

She was cut off by the sound of sirens. Cop cars sped pass, including one clearly marked Police Chief on the side.

"There he is!" Hiro shouted and ran outside before Aunt Cass could stop him.

Varian took off after, followed by Baymax.

"Wait!" Aunt Cass yelled but she couldn't keep up. She stared after them in shock only for a moment before a sparking toaster jumped at her. She kicked it away angrily and it slammed against the wall.

Then Aunt Cass heard more noise coming from upstairs along with the appliances in the kitchen and garage banging against the door.

She hopped over the counter and nabbed a carving knife.  

"Okay, you want a fight! I'll give you a fight!" She shouted at the possessed machinery.

                                                 -----------------------

"So what's the plan?" Varian shouted after Hiro as they ran down the sidewalk.

"We have to find the others and then get to our HQ." Hiro yelled back. "Our equipment should be protected because of the anti-hacking software I programmed into the building's security."

"But how? The phones aren't working and HQ is all the way on the other side of town!  Are we just going to run all the way there?"

"If we have too." Hiro spared a glance behind them. Baymax was way behind, unable to keep up with his stubby legs. Varian had a point. They needed another mode of transport.

Just then a trolley car came barreling down the hill at a breakneck speed; sparks flying from the electric cable it ran along. Passengers screamed in fright as the driver slammed the breaks and even more sparks flew out from under the metal wheels, but the cart still didn't stop.

"They're going to crash!" Hiro yelled hopelessly.

Fortunately that was when Fred came bouncing down the road. He cut the cable wire with his suit's claws and melted the wheels with his fire breath. He then bounded ahead and braced himself in front of the trolley. The metal joints in the legs and arms of his suit took the force of the blow and he was able to slow the tram to a complete stop at the bottom of the hill.

"Way to go Fred!" Varian cheered but was soon interrupted by the sound of a sports car skidding to a stop right next to them.

It was Heathcliff, the Fredricksons' faithful butler. "Need a lift?" He politely asked.

The boys didn't need to be asked twice.

While they waited on Baymax to catch up to the car, they saw Minimax appear on top of the trolley cackling like a maniac. His eyes were red.

"Fear me San Fransokyo! For I Minimax will bring you to your knees!"

The little robot then hopped off from atop the trolley, ran up to the nearest pedestrian, and kicked him in the shins before running away.

"Minimax, wait!" Fred wailed but it was too late, the tiny android was already gone.

Hiro called him over to join them and a dejected Fred hopped into the backseat next to Baymax.

"Hola Fred. Tu frecuencia cardíaca es abnorablemente rápida. Es importante refrescarse después de hacer ejercicio y beber mucha agua."

"How come he's alright but not Minimax?" Fred whined.

"I had to electrocute him and force a reboot." Hiro answered. "I don't know if Minimax would survive the same treatment. He's a lot smaller, and too much voltage could fry all of his circuits for good. We only got lucky with Baymax."

Fred accepted this answer but he was still unhappy over losing his sidekick. So he gave a little huff, crossed his arms, and childishly began to sulk.

"Okay, we got a ride, but how do we contact the others?" Varian asked, bringing them back to task.

"It's already been taken care of, Master Varian." Heathcliff replied. "Boss Awesome has protocols in place just for this scenario. The mansion is safe and so are its communications systems. Your friends should be meeting us at your headquarters."

"Your dad has been planning for the robot apocalypse?" Hiro asked Fred.

"Robot apocalypse, zombie plague, alien invasion, Ragnarok… you name it. Dad's always prepared."

                                                 -----------------------

They arrived at the candy factory and got out. The others were already waiting inside.

"Are ya coming, Heathcliff?" Varian asked.

"No, I believe that I will be more useful helping civilians. You go on without me and find a way to stop this robotic rebellion."

"Will you be okay?" Hiro asked.

Just then, two robots showed themselves across the horizon as they made their way towards the little band. They were restaurant mascots, similar to what Noodle Burger Boy had been before being corrupted by Obake. Only one looked like a hippo that floated along on jets and the other was a panda with a cape that lumbered forward.

Heathcliff took one look at them and gave a small smile as he picked up an umbrella sitting between the seats. "Don't worry about me Master Hiro. You have enough problems on your plate."

He then slammed on the gas pedal and sped towards this new threat head on.

The panda unhinged it's metal mouth and shot grenades out of it. Heathcliff swerved to avoid the explosives with expert precision. Then as the electronic hippo flew at him he cocked the umbrella in his hand and fired a volley of bullets at it. The robot was ripped apart and exploded in midair.

Heathcliff kept on driving, completely unfazed, and barreled through the second android turning it into scrap.

"Why does your butler carry an umbrella that shoots bullets?" Hiro asked in shock as the three teens watched the renegade manservant disappear from view.

Fred simply shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know." He said nonchalantly. "Come on, the guys are waiting on us."

Varian and Hiro took a moment more to stare after where the battle between robot and butler had taken place before following after their friend.

                                                 -----------------------

Trina stood in an empty communications room inside the now abandoned tv station, watching the tv screens as they broadcasted what was happening in the city.

The station had been easy enough to take over. The humans ran away upon simply seeing her. She didn't even need to threaten them… much. A single laser blast from her arm at a nearby wall was enough to make them scatter.

Humans were weak. Weak and stupid; like any bully, they selfishly misused and mistreated both her and her fellow robots, only to run away scared as soon as you stood up to them.

The real problem lay in the fact that there were too many of them. You could get rid of a few people for a little while, but eventually they would come back with reinforcements to dismantle you if you tried.

No, this was the only way. She had to exterminate the entire city in order to make it hospitable. Then she could shut down the radio signal, free her robotic kindred, rebuild the city anew, and live peacefully without any humans interfering.

She watched one particular meatbag dive into a pile of garbage to hide from her electronic army with a mixture of disdain and amusement.

Yes, everything was going according to plan…. Almost. There was still one more thing that needed to be done before her robotic paradise could be realized.

"Don't worry little brother, it won't be long now. He'll show up." She said to the hamburger headed robot that sat behind her.

                                                 -----------------------

"Okay, so what's the plan?" Gogo asked.

The gang was sitting inside HQ waiting for orders. They all sat at the meeting table, save for Hiro who paced around as he formulated an idea.

"We need a way to shut down the rogue electronics safely. We could use an Electro Magnetic Pulse to cause a surge and overload their circuits, but we would need one big enough to blanket the whole city with it's range."

"We can't just cause a city wide blackout. That would be almost as dangerous as letting the robots run amok." Wasabi pointed out. "I mean just think of the hospitals, a strong enough EMP would bypass even their backup generators."

"So what do you suggest?" Varian asked.

"Ooh, ooh, I know!" Fred yelled as he raised his hand high into the air.

"Okay, Fred, what's your idea?" Hiro asked.

"What if we turn this EMP thingy into a gun! Like we can just shoot the robots with it to shut them down!"

"That's...that's actually not a bad idea Fred." Hiro admitted.

"It should be easy to build one." Varian added. "You would just need a capacitor and one of Hiro's high powered electromagnets."

"But what about our own armor?" Honey Lemon asked. "We don't want Trina taking control over those."

"I'll need to program them with the same safety nets that I put into our headquarters security system. That should prevent them from being hacked."

"Okay then," Varian stood up, ending the meeting, "I'll build the EMP gun while you work on everyone's armor."

Baymax raised one finger and said, "Buscaré la señal de radio de Trina"

                                                 -----------------------

Mochi hissed at the invading machine. A hand mixer was flying right at him. The poor cat ran under the couch for safety but the possessed appliance kept going after him, it's spinning beaters poking underneath the sofa.

Then suddenly it was jerked away by a hand, then a slicing sound could be heard, and the mixer fell to the ground in pieces.

Aunt Cass poked her head down underneath the couch. "Are you okay baby?" She asked the cat.

Mochi only meowed in response.

Aunt Cass gently reached out and pulled her pet out from under his hiding place. She then cradled him into a hug.

"It's okay, mommy's got you. I won't let those nasty machines hurt you." She soothed.

However, she didn't notice the newest threat slowly sneaking up behind her. Mochi hissed again and Aunt Cass turned around just in time to see a tall skeletal robot standing before her.

It was an old prototype that Tadashi had built two years ago as part of his school admission. Since then it had been packed away in the attic, disused,  inactive, and forgotten... Until now.

The thing towered over her. It was built from scrap metal and the wires connecting the joints together had frayed. It's faceless head jerked erratically as sparks flew from the broken wires. It reached out its boney like hands to grab her….

Only for Ruddiger to jump out and pounce upon the robot. It's weak joints could not withstand the raccoon's weight and its 'head' popped right off, with the rest of its body falling to the floor in a heap.

"Good job Ruddiger!" Aunt Cass cheered. She bent down and scratched the faithful raccoon behind his ears. "Who's a good boy? You are! Yes you are! I'm making you your own plate of banana pancakes with whip cream when this is all over with, promise."

Ruddiger enjoyed hearing the praise a lot and the promise of food even more. He nuzzled her hand and allowed her to pet him like a cat, thoroughly pleased with himself.

"Okay, that's the last of the electronics in here, now we gotta go find the boys." Aunt Cass suddenly announced as she stood up and began to head downstairs. She still carried Mochi in her arms while Ruddiger dutifully followed after her.

They made their way back to the cafe. The dining room was littered with appliances, all either sliced in half or smashed to bits. Aunt Cass looked out the large windows at a city in the throws of chaos. It would be dangerous to head outside now, but she needed to find her kids, and nothing was going to stop her.

She retrieved another knife that was left lodged in what had once been a coffee bean grinder. She sheathed it inside her apron alongside the rest of cutlery she'd been using to defend herself.

She sat Mochi back down on the ground, walked over to the door, and with a deep breath placed her hand on the handle.

"Are you ready?" She asked her pets.

The question was more to encourage herself than anything, but Aunt Cass could have sworn that she saw Ruddiger nod his head.

The raccoon crawled up on the counter and from there jumped onto her shoulders, fully intent on joining her in her search. She smiled and gave the pet a friendly boop on the nose.

"Coming with, huh? Alright! Then let's go!"

She squared her shoulders, flung open the door, and ran outside.

"Hold down the fort Mochi!" She called after her cat.

Mochi only stood in the doorway staring after her blankly.

"Meow."

                                                 -----------------------

The superheroes raced through the city.

"Whoo Hoo!" Varian yelled.

He was practically hanging out of Wasabi's car window as the jeep sped along the deserted roads. In his hands, he held the newly built EMP gun. It looked like an old fashion blunderbuss but was made of carbon fiber plastic and electronic wires. He shot down rogue robots and runway electronics as the car drove past them. They short circuited and crumpled to the ground, deactivated.

"Be careful!" Wasabi hollered at him as he held the overexcited alchemist back with one hand and attempted to drive with the other.

The rest of the gang rushed about using their armor. Gogo and Honey Lemon skated on opposite sides of the vehicle, each taking out enemies with their respective weapons. Fred bounced ahead, melting attacking self-driving cars with his fire breath.

Baymax and Hiro brought up the rear, they kept an eagle eye out for oncoming threats.  

"You got an incoming bogie on your tail, Wasabi," Hiro advised.

"Understood," Wasabi replied and turned the car around a sharp corner. The gang followed suit.

"Any luck finding Trina?" Honey Lemon asked.

"Negativo" Baymax answered.

Just then they spotted a large purple gelatinous ball of gloop rolling along the ground. The slime sucked up anything electronic and spit it back out in a disassembled heap as it made its way along the sidewalk. Then the blob unfolded, stood up, and waved at the passing superheroes.

"Hi, guys!" Globby cheered.

A little further down the street, Carl was hurrying a small group of people down an alleyway.

"Okay, this way. One at a time, no pushing or shoving. We're going to make it out safe and sound by working together." He reassured the terrified pedestrians.

"Hi, Carl! Hi Globby!" Fred shouted at them.  

Carl waved back as the last of people dove inside the building.

The superheroes paused just long enough to exchange notes with the former criminals.

"We're getting citizens off the streets," Carl explained. "The police have been securing 'safe houses' for folks to take shelter in, ones without any dangerous electronics."

"Chief Cruz even hooked us up with some old-school walkie-talkies! See?" Globby added as he held up a two-wave radio. "It's so ancient that it doesn't have any computer chips. It can't be hacked. All the rescue teams are using them."

"That's good," Hiro replied. "We're busy chasing down the radio signal that's controlling everything. You got any leads?"

The two shook their heads, only for the walkie talkie to sign in.

"Attention all available emergency personnel. Report to the trolley station. I repeat, report to the trolley station downtown. We got some folks trapped down there. Over." Chief Cruz's voice sounded over the intercom.

The superheroes nodded in agreement.

"Stay here and help these people, we'll head to the trolley station." Hiro said, and off everyone went.

                                                 -----------------------

Trina watched upon the viewing screen as the supers arrived on the scene of the trolley station. They got to work immediately rescuing civilians who were pinned down by her army.

"Bingo." She said with a satisfied smile, before turning around and headed out of the room.

                                                 -----------------------

"Is that everyone?" Varian asked as he shot down another ticket machine. The machine stopped spitting plastic passes for the trolley at him, sparked, and then exploded sending money and cards everywhere.

"That's the last one." Gogo answered as Wasabi directed the final person to the barricade that the emergency personnel had setup down the street. As they watched the man run across the road and reach the safe haven, the rest of the gang came up to meet them.

"Okay, if we're done here then we need to move on and keep looking for Trin-" Hiro stopped and turned around to see Trina arriving behind them, riding in on a possessed trolley.

"Hello Hiro." She smirked as she stepped off.

"Trina." Hiro finished, glaring at her.

"Miss me?" She asked.

"Trina you have to stop-"

"Stop what? My plans to improve the city? Trust me it's better this way."

"Yeah maybe for you, but what about the rest of us?" Fred snarked.

Trina ignored him. Her eyes never left Hiro. Until Varian stepped in between them, that is.

"Trina listen, please-"

"Oh like I care about what you have to say 'nice guy'." Trina rolled her eyes. "This is between me and Hiro."

"Yeah, well if you want Hiro, then you'll have to go through us." Honey Lemon said, also stepping forward. The rest of the team followed her, each placing themselves between their friend and the giant robot girl.

"Okay." Trina shrugged.

That was when several robotic ninjas also walked into view, surrounding them. "Oh, not again." Wasabi whined.

"Have you met my new friends?" Trina asked. "I don't know who built them, I just found them abandoned in a dusty old warehouse. The poor things were locked away in the dark and left to rust." Trina wrapped an arm around one of the battle droids. "They're much happier now that I've freed them from their cruel master. Isn't that right Steve? Oh, I named him Steve by the way."

"Hi Steve." Wasabi gulped as he gave an awkward wave at the deadly robot.

'Steve' responded by unsheathing his katana.

"Go get him Steve." Trina ordered and the robot ran forward. Only for Varian to step forward and shoot the robot down with his EMP gun. The ninja sputtered and sparked and then fell to the ground in a dismantled heap.

Trina glared daggers at him and Varian met her gaze steadily, almost daring her to continue.

"Fine. Be that way." She pouted. Then, with a snap of her fingers, a new challenger appeared behind her; Minimax.  

The tiny robot came barreling down the road at top speed on a car he had hijacked. He balanced himself on top of the steering wheel while the gas pedal was held down by a brick.

Minimax laughed like a madman as the car slammed into the trolley at full throttle. The little droid jumped from the wreckage just in time and used the momentum of the crash to fling himself into the air, where he did a triple somersault and landed perfectly on his feet as if it was nothing.

"You're going down pathetic humans, for I am Minimax, the unstoppable scourge!" He declared.

Everyone stared at the two foot tall android slack jawed, until Varian gathered his wits about him and leveled the gun.

"No, you'll hurt him, remember!" Fred called out.

Varian relaxed his aim, unsure of what to do. This proved to be a mistake.

The tiny bot leapt at him and landed on the tip of the gun, his weight pushing the nozzle down to the ground and nearly ripping the weapon out of Varian's hands.

That was when chaos broke loose.

As Varian wrestled for control of the EMP away from Minimax, the rest of the ninjas attacked, along with any other nearby electronics.

Everyone fought back against the oncoming horde, each utilizing their various weapons, but they were soon overrun by sheer numbers.

The robots assaulted them from all sides and no one could predict who, what, and where the next attack would come.

                                                 -----------------------

As they fought, Baymax and Hiro found themselves separated from their friends. They were cornered next to the entrance. Baymax did his best to shield Hiro as the teenager tried to trip up the ninjas with his electromagnetic whips. Hiro wanted to fly away, but they couldn't catch a free moment to do so.

Suddenly Trina let out a high pitched whistle as Baymax punched another robot away, gaining their attention.

"Hey, Baymax!" She yelled, "Don't look now but here comes your ride!"

Before Hiro knew what was happening, Baymax picked him up and hurled him out of the way of an oncoming trolley. The tram slammed into Baymax and crashed into the glass doors of the station.

Hiro called after his robotic companion but he was stopped by a large metal hand closing around his arm and yanking him back.

"Oh no you don't. You're coming with me." And with that, Trina started to drag him away.

                                                 -----------------------

Varian finally kicked Minimax off of the EMP gun and turned around just in time to spot Hiro being kidnapped.

He raised his gun and took aim, only for Minimax to recover and return the kick.

The little robot was stronger than he looked and broke the gun in two with a snap.

Varian looked down at his destroyed weapon in horror, but he didn't have time to react because soon one of the robotic ninjas grabbed him by his shirt collar and lifted him off of the ground. He kicked and tried to squirm out the faceless attacker's grasp, but it was no use.

"Varian!" Honey Lemon called to him. She tossed him a chimball, which he grabbed and firmly lodged it into the robot's elbow joint. Pink bubbles began to spew from its arm, growing larger and larger as the foaming chemical reacted to the air. The ninja released him before being swallowed up by the goop.

Varian tried to catch his breath and desperately looked around the battlefield for his brother, but Hiro was gone.

[no-nottoday]

Offer Of A Lifetime - Dope Series (Jin)

Doctor!Jin x Mafia leader!reader

Word Count: 1342

A/N: This is my first story on tumblr. Let me know what you think. 

“Dr Kim, we have a patient for you. Eight-year-old girl who fell down the stairs at school. The school rushed her to the hospital.”

Seokjin looked up from his computer to the nurse that had come into his office during his break. Technically, he still had twenty minutes left but it wouldn’t be a day at the hospital with a reduced lunch. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before looking at the nurse.

“What’s her condition? Concussion, injuries etc?” He asked as he saved his work and locked his computer.

“She won’t let anyone near her. She won’t talk to anyone.”

Seokjin got up from his chair and rubbed his eyes. After a long shift he wasn’t in the mood for incompetent staff that couldn’t deal with patients. He passed the nurse and noticed her blushing. Not another one. He knew the nurses gossiped about him. His relationship status was their favourite topic. Followed closely by his bedroom activities.

“What room?”

“Oh uh, she’s in one of the private rooms. E2, down the hallway.”

“Private… who is this child?”

“I’m not sure, Dr Kim.”

Jin shook his head and walked out of his office. He turned down the hallway to one of the private sections of the hospital. As he strode down the hallway he wondered why the staff had thought he would be the best for this situation. Sure, he was good with children. He was one of the hospital's main paediatricians, but he worked more with teenagers than little kids.

He stood in front of the private room this mysterious girl was in. Taking a deep breath, he knocked on the door before looking through the window. He could see a bundle of cheap duvet covers on the bed and suspected that the girl was trying to hide away. He shook his head before opening the door. The bundle on the bed stopped moving around.

“Hello. My name is Dr Kim, but you can call me Jin. What’s your name sweetie?” Jin asked softly. The bundle moved around before the side of the duvet slowly lifted before being pulled back down. Jin chuckled. “You know. I like to hide away from people too.”

The duvet lifted once more before a small voice spoke out, “it’s scary. I’ve never been to a hospital before.” The duvet dropped once again. Not before he caught a glimpse of chocolate brown eyes.

“Oh no. You don’t need to be scared. I’ll look after you and make you all better. Doctor’s promise.”

The duvet slowly moved back to reveal the young girl. She blinked away the tears in her eyes and Jin felt a strange sense of protectiveness over the girl.

“What’s your name sweetie? Or should I make one up?” Jin put his hand to his chin and hummed. “Maybe Cinderella or Aurora. You’re as pretty as a princess.”

The girl giggled before shaking her head. “Nope.” She popped the ‘P’. “It’s Karina. Karina (L/N).”

Jin paused. Where had he heard that name before?

Suddenly the door burst open, and a woman rushed in and hugged the little girl. The girl cuddled into the woman. Jin’s heart was touched at the affection between them.

“Karina. You’re ok. Thank god.”

“I’m ok mum. Dr Jinnie was looking after me.”

At that the woman turned to him. “Thank you. She’s like me, not a fan of strangers. Rarely does she warm up to people.”

Jin felt weird. The woman wasn’t frowning at him but wasn’t smiling. He was just about to question it when her phone start ed ringing.

“Hello. Oh Carlos. Why the hell wasn’t the family doctor notified that my daughter was hurt and why wasn’t she sent to the house infirmary. Instead, she’s in a public hospital scared.”

There was a pause and the woman’s face grew slightly angrier. “What do you mean the doctor is injured and taking leave. Why?” Another pause. “Because you and Andreas got in a fight. Fantastic.”

The woman hung up. She took a deep breath before putting a smile on her face.

“I’m so sorry about that. My brothers were idiots and injured the family doctor and in turn, Karina had to come to the hospital apparently.” She turned to her daughter. “I’m sorry sweet pea, I should’ve been there for you.” She kissed the top of her daughter's head before turning back to Jin. He suddenly felt shy under her gaze. “Thank you for taking care of her. She’s very nervous of new people especially after being adopted into the family.”

“It’s my job, looking after the young people and children that come to the hospital. It’s what I trained for.”

“You seem good at it. My name is (Y/N) (L/N) by the way.”

Jin was shocked. That’s where he recognised the name from. The most powerful family currently and he was looking after one of the children. He gulped if he had done something wrong...She smiled. “Don’t worry. You’ve done nothing wrong. To be honest you work better with Karina than the family doctor ever has.”

“May I check her over?”

They both turned to the girl who was looking between the two of them, grinning. Jin felt a blush rising from his neck to the tips of his ears.

“I don’t think she’ll mind. I need to go settle the bills anyway.” (Y/N) turned away from Jin and to Karina. “Let me know if you need me.”

With that, she left the room. Karina turned to Jin and poked one of his cheeks. “You like my mummy don’t you.”

“Uh, no. It’s nothing-g like um that.” Jin stuttered, blush deepening.

“It’s ok. She likes you too. She doesn’t normally act like that to strangers. Has to be careful, you know.”

“I’m sure she does. Right, back to you. How are you feeling?”

“I’m ok. It wasn’t a bad fall. I’ve had worse. I didn’t hit my head if that’s what you’re wondering. I just felt faint because I hadn’t drunk water.”

“Ok. Well, I’m going to do some checks anyway to make sure. I need to take your blood pressure.

“Mmhm. So, do you have someone or not. You should go out with mummy.”

“You don’t give up, do you. Anyway, sit still while I put this on you. Make sure to relax.” Jin wrapped the small Velcro fabric band around her thin arm. He waited for the results before the machine beeped and he noted the results down. He undid the band from her arm and put it away.

“My arm hurts. It was so tight.” Karina complained, rubbing her arm.

“Oh no. We can’t have that. How about I get you a sweet and that’ll make it better. Sweets always make things better.” Karina giggled and nodded. “Ok, well let me go hand in these results and I’ll go find one.

“Sweets, my goodness you’re being spoiled.”

“Mummy!”

“Thank you Dr Kim.”

Jin blushed. “It’s no problem. I’m just glad she’s feeling ok.” Jin stared at (Y/N) who was hugging Karina close to her and stroking her hair. It made Jin smile.

“Dr Kim. There’s a new patient that’s just come in that you need to see.” A nurse stated from the doorway.

“Noooo Dr Kim.”

“Of course, nurse Jihyo. I’ll be right there.”

“Karina. He needs to go see other patients.”

“But. I don’t want to share him with other people.” Karina frowned. Jin and (Y/N) started laughing. “Anyway, someone might steal him from you mummy.” Jin started coughing at that whilst (Y/N) laughed harder.

“I need to go.” Jin stated. Eyes down, face burning.

“Of course.” (Y/N) nodded. As Jin started to leave, (Y/N) stood up and cleared her throat. ”I do have a proposition for you Dr Kim. Would you like to be one of our family doctors. More specifically, the paediatrician for the family. Everything would be paid for, and you would travel around the world with us. It’s up to you.

“I’m not sure.”

“That’s ok. Here’s my number, call me if you’re interested.”

[imhereiguess556]

The Accident

Chromeskull x OC(female) Alex Hey guys! So this is the first chapter to my story I have been working on for a while. If you ya’ll like it, I’ll post the rest of the chapters on here.  Chapter 1 It had all happened so fast. One minute Alex was going about her day, driving into work. The next minute she woke up in a haze, barely able to move her left arm. Touching her head she groaned as the headache forced her back down onto the pillow. Her vision blurry making her nauseous, closing her eyes tightly. A sharply dressed man and someone looking like they just got off their job working for the Geek squad walked over to her bed side. Alex heard the foot steps and opened her eyes again. While the geek guy with the tablet typed some things in the sharp dresser leaned to her face. “Hello there, I am obligated to ask how you are feeling but quiet frankly I don’t care.”             

Alex closed her eyes tight again, “Am I…In the hospital?” The man huffed and straightened himself out, “No but you don’t need to know where you are. Quite frankly soon you won’t need to know anything about anything soon. I’m going to be taking you to my bo-“While he was talking, Alex lurched to the side of the bed, puking all over his shoes. The man screamed and took a few steps back, “Are you kidding me! These are real leather! HEY! Take care of her while I clean up.” Tablet man nodded and went to the monitors, while the other one walked away in anger.             

“Miss I’m going to need your arm.” The man softly took her arm, but Alex lazily pulled it away, “Noooo my health insurance isn’t going to cover that. I’m broke.” The man took her arm again, but Alex roughly grabbed his neck, starting to choke him out, “No means NO asshole! She shoved him off his feet, causing him to fall back. Alex pulled the tubs off her body and slowly stood up, fumbling down onto the concrete floor. “Oooww….gotta…get to…car…” Crawling to a wall she leaned into it, pushing herself up onto her feet. Walking along the wall, she started making her way out of the makeshift hospital ward. Alex’s vision was slowly coming back, but she still felt loopy. They must have had her on some heavy pain killers or sedatives. Looking down at her arm, she finally noticed it was in a cast.            

 “Well damn, maybe angry man will sign you. But after I get out.” Walking around the building she ended up in a tool show area filled with knives and other weapons. Mouthing the word ‘cool’ she wandered in as two men were grinding down on some metal. One of them noticed her picking up a hunter’s knife with brass knuckles welded to them. “Hey! You can’t be in here!” She turned to them and pointed at what they were making, “Is that a fidget spinner knife?” One of the guys looked down at it, then back at her nodding with a shrug in his shoulders. Alex snickered, “That’s….stupid..” She started wandering away, one of them men picked up the phone yelling ‘code 12’ into it.            Preston was in the bathroom cleaning his shoes when code twelve started getting yelled over the speaker of the building. Preston looked at the door, “Code twelve!? WHAT CODE TWELVE?!” Just then his cellphone went off, a text coming in from ‘Boss’. Picking it up it read ‘why is there a code twelve in my building? Fix it.’ Preston cursed as he pocketed his phone, running out of the bathroom. Alex still wandering the building, she walked up to an office map, rubbing her eyes while she saw double. “Where am I? Is this come kind of private hospital? Oh, shit I’m really gonna get screwed on my insurance. How did I…end up here?”            

Closing her eyes, she focused on what she could remember. She was in her car listening to her favorite playlist while driving somewhere. Her car hit someone else car or they hit her? She got out, talked to the driver, she’s holding something? But then he… she groaned as her head throbbed. That was all her brain was letting her remember at the moment. Looking at the map again she saw a long hallway that looked like it said ‘Boss office’ on it. Figuring that was who to talk to about this, she started wobbling down the hallway again. She wandered into a break room, luckily for her it was empty. Opening their fridge, she saw some waters bottles that she knew she could never afford in her lifetime. Grabbing one with her somewhat free hand she just for the life of her couldn’t remember how to open it. Shrugging as she placed the water bottle on the countertop, Alex used as much of her brain power that she had at the moment. Her solution was to start stabbing at it softly, raising the bottle up, letting the water flow into her mouth.            

“HEY! KNOCK THAT OFF” Snappy dresser Preston was back, and he was pissed. Shaking the bottle off her knife she frowned at him, giving him a meek wave. Rubbing his eyes, Preston glared daggers at her, “If you know what’s good for you, you will follow me back to your bed.” Alex shook her head no, “I’m going to see your boss.” Preston stared walking to her slowly, “You will see him when he comes to see you in the bed. Now come here.” Alex just stood there, staring at the man, watching his moves. Was really going to underestimate someone holding a knife? That’s really stupid of him.            Once in arms length, Preston went to grab her free arm, but Alex pulled back quickly. Dodging around him, she lowered her reach, cutting right behind his knee, causing him to scream out in pain. Preston fell on the ground, holding the back of his leg. “YOU crazy BITCH!” Wiping the blood on her gown she realized she was not in her normal clothes. Frowning she started to wobble out of the room, but not before Preston grabbed her ankle, trying to pull her down. Alex started stomping on his wrist then his head, causing him to yell out in pain. When he let go, she started waddling her way down the hallway.             

After wandering for what felt like forever, she finally found the hallway she was looking for. Still feeling loosely goosey, climbing the stairs was much harder than she thought it would be. Every step causing her to see double, the pain killers must have started to wear off cause now her arm started to hurt. Getting to the top of the stairs, she was greeted by a well-dressed woman. “Ah, so you’re our code twelve I see. The little secret Preston was keeping from our boss Chromeskull.” Alex leaned against the wall, “Are you the head doctor here? I’m starting to hurt. Can I talk to the boss here please? I wanna get my car and leave.” This woman was Spann, though Preston was Chromeskulls right hand man, she recently had been cleaning up all of his messes. After their boss’s accident, Preston had been trying to find ways to get rid of Spann so that he would have full control with the workings of the business. But Spann knew if Preston’s little secret came wondering into Chromeskulls office, she would finally have some leverage to prove to the boss that Preston was an incompetent boob.             

Spann took Alexs shoulder and walked her towards the boss’s office door.  Opening it for Alex, Spann ushered the weak woman in, closing the door behind her. The dark office made it a little easier to see. The lights were hurting her eyes anyways. A computerized voice came from her side, ‘How did you get in here?’ Alex turned to see a man sitting at the desk. He was wearing a black dress shirt and a black suit jacket on, buts all she could make out, the computer moneters light didn’t show his face. Alex pointed to the door, “Angry dress man said you wanted to see me..or…at the bed?” The pain was making her whole body pulsate. Her body was not use to her walking around anymore. How long was she out for?            

Alex walked towards the desk, holding up the knife but placing it down in front of him, “Sorry about your knife. Its cool so I took it with me.  Do you…where am I?” She could feel the man staring at her but not showing his face. He pulled a cellphone out of his jacket pocket, typing something. Holding the phone out, it started talking ‘You should not be here.’ Alex nodded, “I told sharp dress man that but he said I was a surpise for you and honestly don’t like surpises they stress me out so I puked on him and…and..” She covered her mouth, heaving coming from her throat. The man at the desk stood up quickly, walking over to her, he pulled her towards the private bathroom. A big hand slid to pull her long copper hair back as she puked into the toilet.           

 “I-I’m sor-“ She heaved again, using her all strength to hold up her shaking body. “I don’t remember anything. Just car accident an-“ Alex’s time was up, all her energy was gone, her shaky hand reached for him clinging onto his dress shirt. Alex felt what was a napkin wipe her face. Follower by a glass of water, gulping it down and Alex started ugly crying. “Thank you. You’re nice.” Looking up at his face, she was greeting by a metallic skull looking town at her. The man towered over her, broad shoulders, masculine jaw, and a chrome skull mask staring at her. Maybe it was the drugs still in her body, maybe it was the exhaustion but Alex just hugged the man, snuggling her face into his defined chest her tears soaking into his jacket. They both stood there for a minute until Alex pulled back, looking up at him. Her vision going double again, then black, her body giving out, “Oh down I go” Her body falling over, but towering man caught her half way down.            

Preston ran into Chromeskulls office, his leg bandaged and his face red from running. Chrome skull was sitting behind his desk again while Alex was sleeping on his couch, his jacket cover her. ‘Why is she here.’ Chromeskulls phone asked Preston.  Preston straightens himself out,  “I know this looks bad, but she’s the woman from the accident I told you about! See, we all know you’re looking for someone who looks like your dead wife so here she is! Close look huh?” Chromeskull sat in silence, eventually typing, ‘Get out.’ Preston pointed at Alex, “So I’m in trouble for trying to do something good for you?! If Spann did this, you’d be over the moon! I do everythin-“Chromeskull stood up and typed, ‘Get out’ one more time. Preston huffed and walked out, slamming the door behind him. Chromeskull let out a sigh as he texted Spann to get the body moving car ready , as well as make sure one of the doctors was ready to depart with their medical supplies. He looked at the passed out woman, studying her features. Pulling out his wallet he pulled out an old photo. It was one of him and his late wife, her face beaming with joy. Oh god, this woman's smile was almost a perfect match that it was eerie. Was he about to go through with the idea of tricking someone into being his wife? Would that even work?

[poorboypictures]

Major America: Ch. 1

Jordon Wilkinson was seven years old when he first learned of Captain America; he and his siblings were told by their grandfather of the time he fought beside Captain America and Bucky in World War II. All were enthralled, but none more than Jordon himself. Jordon began reading all he could about the Captain’s escapades before and during the war, learning his origin, his identity, and his disappearance; taking the hero to heart, Jordon stood up for those who couldn’t stand for themselves throughout his life, even joining the military after the Twin Towers fell, serving seven years before a hip injury took him out of action permanently. In 2012, Captain America resurfaced and Jordon was thrilled to have him as a moral standard in the country again, only to notice a change in the hero over the years.

***

2021, nine years after Captain America was freed from the ice; Major Jordon Wilkinson sits in a security office picking at his spaghetti and meatball lunch, staring intently in thought. Wally Gertz, his partner, is fidgeting with a Rubik’s Cube keychain with his feet up.

“Something wrong?” Wally asks.

Jordon blinks a few times and looks over at Wally. “Hmm?”

“Lunch ended ten minutes ago and usually you finish in five minutes just to keep watch on the feed.”

“No, I just have a lot on my mind.” Jordon takes a bite of his lunch as Wally puts away the cube.

“We’ve been working the same shift together for three years, Jordon; I would think I can read you well enough.”

Jordon sighs and pushes his lunch away before leaning back in his chair.

“You know the phrase ‘never meet your heroes’?”

Wally takes his feet off of the desk and leans forward. “You met him? You met Captain America?” He asks, eyes wide.

Jordon slowly nods. “The saying is true. At least, it wouldn’t have been if I met him when he came out of the ice. He’s changed and I think society was what did it; a man out of time, trying to keep up with the seventy years he missed, and I believe it corrupted him.”

“Sounds plausible; society is a bit of a mess these days.” He straightens his hat. “It’s a shame someone can’t just grab the shield and say ‘I’m the Captain now’.”

Jordon stops completely, an idea forming.

***

Later that day; Jordon is in his apartment on his computer, looking for a shield.

“The shield is the easy part.” He says to himself. “It’s the costume that will be hard to get; how am I going to get an extra thousand dollars for an accurate costume?”

He pauses as something dawns on him.

“Hang on…”

He gets up, grabs his phone, and calls someone as he sits back down at the computer.

“Hello?” Georgie Berke answers the phone.

“Georgie, it’s me, Jordon.”

“Hey, Jordy! How are you doing? How was your nephew’s birthday?”

“Loud, and disruptive, but I love him, so I didn’t leave. So, hey, I have a question.”

“Shoot.”

“How does one get an accurate costume?”

“Jordy.” She says teasingly. “Are you getting into cosplay?”

“Georgie, I’m 43 years old, I don’t do cosplay.”

“I’m 37, Jordy, what’s your point?”

“My point is-.” He says with a tad of frustration. “I want an accurate costume and I would like to know how to get one for a good price.”

“Weeelll… if you had an extra small fortune to spend on one you could do that.”

“Nope.” Jordon shakes his head. “I have bills to pay.”

“Then you could make a costume with your own twist, I’ve seen plenty of cosplayers use this method to save a buck without having to get a cheaply made costume.”

“That sounds doable. Thanks.”

“May I ask what exactly this is for?”

“… No. Bye.”

He hangs up, opens a new tab, and begins searching for his costume-with-a-twist.

***

One week later; Jordon is in his apartment listening to a police scanner app on his phone as he peals masking tape off of the recently painted heater shield; just as Jordon finishes taking the tape off, dispatch warns of an attempted robbery at a nearby bank.

“That’s a mile from here…” Jordon says to himself as he looks at his partly assembled costume on the couch; he looks at the shield and back to the couch, wondering whether he should go without a complete costume.

Jordon sighs and quickly puts the costume on, wearing the shield on his back like a backpack; he jumps down the fire escape and onto a red 2013 Harley-Davidson Breakout, tearing out of the alley way and down the street.

Literally a minute later, Jordon pulls into the alley next to the bank and walks into the rear entrance to hear two men trying to break into the safety deposit boxes; he sneaks up behind them, pulls out his gun, pistol-whips one crook, knocking him out, and knocks out the other with his shield, only for the resounding “clang!” to catch the attention of the crook standing guard at the other side of the room.

The crook shouts at Jordon. “HEY!”

Before Jordon can turn around and shield himself, the gunman shoots him in the thigh and side; Jordon holds in a scream of pain as the gunman empties his magazine into the shield; as the gunman tries to quickly reload, Jordon sprints forward at full speed and punches the man out cold only to find himself in front of the remaining three robbers ready to fire on him.

“Oh, crap…”

Jordon ducks behind the shield as the three men fire at him, emptying their magazines; they stop to taunt him as they reload.

“You supposed to be Captain America or something, man?” One asks.

“He’s got a round shield, you imbecile!” Another taunts.

Jordon takes a deep breath, blocking out the pain from being shot, and pulls out his gun.

“Come on, just like in the military.” He whispers to himself

He stands up and hits the first two gunmen in the shoulder without effort, but he and the third gunman fire at the same time; Jordon hits the gunman in the shoulder same as before, and the gunman hits Jordon in the bicep. The gunman goes down and Jordon holsters his gun, his breathing shaky; he looks around at the employees and citizens getting up from the floor.

“Is everyone okay?” He asks, trying to keep his voice from shaking.

A man in a suit nods. “Yes, we’re fine, but you need a doctor.”

“I’ve suffered worse, trust me.” Jordon says as he turns to go back the way he came in.

“Wait!” A woman calls. “What do we call you?”

Jordon stops and looks back. “I’m… Major America.”

He heads to the back of the bank to leave.

***

Soon, in Georgie’s apartment, Georgie is watching the news as she sips from a cup of tea; the news anchor is reporting on the bank robbery when the footage of the fight is played on screen. Georgia spews her tea out, coughing.

“JORDY!?”

***

In Jordon’s apartment, Jordon is sitting at his dining table stitching up the wound on his side when his front door bursts open, causing Jordon to jump as Georgie bolts in.

“Why didn’t you tell me!?”

Jordon grabs some gauze and puts pressure on his wound that has begun bleeding again.

“I really need to lock my door more often.” Jordon says, wincing. “Can you pass me that whiskey?”

He points to the bottle on the kitchen counter and Georgie hands it to him, watching as he takes a swig.

“Why are you drinking while stitching yourself up?” Georgie asks. “How do you even know how to stitch a wound?”

Jordon continues stitching.

“Back in Iraq our field medic got hit by a frag grenade along with a couple others; the anesthetic was apparently hit and drained out so we raided the basement of a bombed bar and the medic taught me how to stitch a wound because I had the steadiest hands.” He takes another swig of whiskey. “Sometimes the old ways are the best.”

He finishes stitching the wound and places some gauze over it.

“Can you hold that while I wrap the wound?”

“Fine.” Georgie huffs as she holds the gauze in place. “Just tell me what you were thinking when you decided to do this?”

“What are you? My mother?” Jordon quips as he finishes wrapping his wound. “I’m a grown man who can make his own decisions.”

“Not when they get you nearly killed!”

Jordon stands up and puts his shirt back on.

“I fought for seven years in a country that hated my guts, I can stand to fight a few more in another country that hates my guts. Doesn’t matter what you say, Georgie, I won’t stop what I’ve started.”

Georgie sighs and crosses her arms in a huff.

“No, you’re right; you’re an adult.”

She notices his bloodied costume and picks up the sweater.

“Also, what kind of costume is this? A baby could do better!”

“The gloves and jacket hadn’t arrived yet, they’ll be here in a couple of days.”

Georgie looks at him, cocking an eyebrow.

“Are you… Are you cropping a jacket?”

“… Noooo…” Jordon answers reluctantly.

“What color is the jacket?”

“Blue…”

“The only way you’re going to get the look you want is by cropping the jacket.”

“Fine! Yes, I’m going to crop the jacket!” Jordon winces and holds his side after the defeated outburst bothers his wound. “Okay, back to small talk.” He says, pained.

Georgie picks up Jordon’s helmet and mask and gives it a once over.

“Where did you get this?” She asks.

“The helmet was my grandfathers; quick coat of paint and it was perfect.” He takes a swig of whiskey once again. “The mask I found at an antique shop; the tag said it was an aviator’s mask used in the war, but I’ve never seen one like this before.”

“And the shield?”

“Got that online, bought three and tested two of them on my uncles range to see what guns they could handle; surprisingly a lot. I’m going to have to buy more after a while though, I’ll need to make a budget for that.”

“You really are serious about this, aren’t you?” Georgie asks, pulling a chair up next to Jordon.

“I am.”

“Why, though? What on God’s green Earth would get you to do this?” She asks, genuinely concerned.

“America needs a hero who will truly fight for them, a hero who understands what it means to be the little guy, America needs an underdog; do you think Ironman understands what it’s like to live paycheck-to-paycheck, or if Thor understands what it’s like to get mugged and you can’t pay your rent by the end of the week?”

“Probably not…” Georgie says.

“We rely too much on them; yeah, they’ve saved the world, but we don’t need Black Widow to find a stolen car. I’m going to try to be like that spider guy in Manhattan; he sticks to one area and does it well.”

Georgie stands up and stretches.

“If you’re going to do something stupid, I may as well help: if you find any information you can’t track just call me and I’ll see if I can find anything for you; I’m pretty good with computers, you know.”

“Yeah, I know. I’ll see you Monday.”

Georgie smiles and leaves the apartment.

***

A couple days later; a young man is being mugged by two men in an alley way, getting beaten; someone clears their throat and the muggers stop and turn to look down the alley to see Major America wearing a complete costume.

“Alright, boys, we can do this the easy way or the hard way.” He says.

The muggers look at each other and pull their knives.

“Hard way it is.”

He raises his shield and jumps into the fray.

End.

The Incomplete costume.

The Complete Costume.

Don't judge the art too harshly, I know what I have to work on I don't need people pointing it out.

Also, I suck at writing origins, I'm better at writing stories where the reader is assumed to know exactly who the characters are.

[gemstoneconstellations]

Date me

Summary: Oblivious Deku doesn’t notice you flirting with him so you decide to get bold.

wordcount: 1794

You sigh as you secure the villain, pulling tightly on the capture rope around his hands and feet. Further down the road, you see your fellow hero from your agency cuffing the other two villains he’d taken down. Sighing again and sitting down on top of the hogtied villain, who complained and tried to squirm away, you freely ogled the smiling hero, Deku. 

His muscles rippled and tugged at his suit, hinting at all the curves and divots in his body. That man was the complete package: he was kind and caring to others, strong, highly intelligent, cute, determined, and had a killer bod. But the thing is, despite being a walking sin, he was completely innocent and oblivious. It’s not like he isn’t aware of you; he just doesn’t realize when or think anyone would flirt with him. For months, you’ve been subtly flirting with Deku, trying to spark his interest, but nothing has happened. You sigh, pouting to yourself as you held down the villain who was still trying to get away. 

It took a lot of courage just to lightly flirt with Deku, but now it’s looking like you’d need to be more forward. Determined to make Deku see you more as a woman than a fellow hero, you dragged the cursing villain over to the police cruiser that had pulled up. As the police handled putting the criminals in quirk-canceling cuffs and into their vehicle, you made your way over to your patrol partner.

The adorable Deku just smiled at you as he adjusted his utility belt, putting away the capture rope he’d used. You scooted closer to him, biting your lower lip as you felt his body heat radiate off of him. It’s now or never; you go in for the kill. “You know, when you fight, you got some major Daddy vibes going on.”

“Daddy? I’m hardly a father figure.” You almost want to smack yourself at that reply. But you don’t lose hope.

“Oh no, I’m not talking daddy. I mean,” you stand on your toes to whisper hotly into his ear, making sure your lips brush against it. “Daddy.”

The response this time was instantaneous. Deku turned to you with a completely flushed face. “Don-don’t say things like that!”

You chuckled at him; so he does understand sexual jokes. Leaning suggestively towards him, you smirked as he tried to lean away. “You gonna punish me? Spank me, Daddy?” You ended it with a wink and Deku let out an indescribable screech from his mouth.

“Okay! Time to continue our patrol!” He quickly turned from you, walking robotically, like he had to think about how to walk and work his limbs properly. You skipped behind him, letting him calm down. For the rest of the patrol, he was unable to make eye contact with you. Oh, this will be fun.

Over the course of the next few days, you would throw over-the-top flirtatious lines at Deku. He never saw it coming, too. One day, you entered the office earlier than usual. There was a pile of paperwork sitting on your desk that you've been putting off. Luckily, you saw that the last person that had clocked in was Deku. 

Looking around the corner to the said hero’s office, you saw him sitting at his desk, typing away on his company computer in his civilian clothes. He’s most likely doing the same thing you’d planned on doing.

 “Hey, Deku,” you cheered as you walked over to his desk. The poor man had no idea what was about to happen as he looked at you with his usual sweet smile.

“Hello—” You plopped right onto his desk, legs crossed and pressed close to him. Your hands went to work, feeling his arm and causing the pen he was holding to fly out of his hand. “What are you doing?!”

You fingers ran up and down his arm, feeling the curves, bulging veins, and deep scars on his skin.“Feeling your muscles. It’s amazing how much power comes from these compact guns. You’re amazing.”

You could hear him swallow, his eyes bouncing around the room and refusing to settle on you. His ears were quickly turning red. But he didn't pull away so you took that as a good sign. “Th-Th-Thank you, I—”

“I bet you could hold me against the wall one handed for hours, no problem.” Again, his face instantly became a deep shade of red. You couldn't help but giggle as you poked at his warm cheek. “Oh, Deku turned into a sexy tomato.”

“I NEED TO GO ON PATROL NOW!” He stood up and practically ran out of the room, accidentally clipping his shoulder on the doorway and stepping into a garbage can. You tried to cover a snort behind your hand when he lifted his foot and the can stayed on his foot. Looking back at you, he chuckled nervously as he pulled off the trash can and ran towards the locker rooms.

After that, you made more of an effort to make physical contact. Nothing too extreme. Commenting on his strength while brushing his arms. Your hands would “accidentally” touch when passing paperwork or when patrolling beside each other. Everytime you were rewarded with his adorable blush. He was becoming more aware of you and it was fantastic. Finally, he was seeing you in a different light.

“Wanna spar?” You walked straight up to Deku while he was on the leg press. Today was both of your days off and you knew Deku always used the agency’s gym in the morning on his days off. Sometimes the two of you would workout together if your schedules allowed you to.

He gave you a cautious look, probably trying to figure out if you were planning something. You just smiled at him innocently. “Sure…,” he agreed and the two of you made your way to the floor mats.

Both of you got into your fighting positions. You loved one-upping the higher ranking hero, it was exhilarating. Deku always gave you detailed instructions on how to improve and moves you could add to your fighting style. But today was not the day for that. In two minutes flat, Deku had you pinned down on to the floor without breaking a sweat. “That was too easy.” He raised an eyebrow at you.

“Okay, so maybe I wanted to be pinned down by your arms this time.” You smiled up at him as he just blinked owlishly at you. “Your pretty eyes and iron buns always leave me pinned to the ground.”

You could see the exact moment when he had fully processed your words. He quickly let go of your pinned arms and stood up. “I’m… I’m… I think I’m done for the day! I’ll see you tomorrow!”

He ran around the gym, picking up his things while you just layed on the mat, watching him. Just as he was stepping out the door you shouted, “Hate to see you leave, but love to watch you go!”

“Gaaaah!” You chuckled as he stumbled through the doors; he always became extremely clumsy when flustered.

After a month of constant flirting, your mood has improved as much as Deku’s face consistently stayed red. Tonight should be fun; there is a mandatory company gathering where everyone got together at a rented-out bar to drink the night away. It’s to help keep morale up and to make sure people took it easy once in a while. You luckily got to run into a tipsy Deku on your way out of the bathroom. Your boss loves to have drinking contests with the younger heroes and Deku was most likely one of his victims. He was leaning against the wall with his eyes closed. “Hey Deku, looking good with that blush.”

He opened an eye to see you standing beside him and groaned. “Stop teasing me, I can’t with my mind fuddled like this.”

You giggled; that was fair and gave him a nod. “Are you drunk?”

“No, but you a meanie. Flirting with me suddenly to just make me flustered… so mean…” He was practically pouting beside you. He still thinks you’re messing with him. After all that?

Gosh, why do you like such an oblivious guy? “Deku I’ve been flirting with you for like months and you never reacted before. I just decided to be more forward, so happy you noticed, Mister Oblivious.” You let your back hit the wall as you gently leaned against him.

He let you do as you pleased, now used to your gentle touches. “You’re just saying that. I’m plain and nerdy.” He still sounded pouty, not believing you at all.

Him not being aware of how hot and sweet he was had been endearing in the beginning, but now it was just getting ridiculous. “Deku…Midoriya Izuku, I’m not just saying it. Nerds are sooo my type. I think you’re adorable and I find you very attractive. So attractive that you’re Mister Sexy Buns in my phone.”

For the first time tonight, you heard him laugh. “Noooo.”

“Yes.” You held up your phone to show him your texts, his contact name on top of the screen. 

You felt him lean his weight into you as he laughed uncontrollably. “Pfft, that’s so weird and a silly name.”

“Hey, don’t deny the sexiness that is your ass. Best ass in Japan, hands down, ” you stated matter-of-factly. You weren't the only one who thought so. A gossip magazine rated heroes asses and Deku got number three in all of Japan. If it had just been men being rated, you are sure he would have been number one.

“I don’t know, you have a nice butt.” You choked on airl did Deku just say you had a nice butt? What? You were so shocked, you were speechless. “Ooooh, can dish it out no problem but baby can’t handle it when it’s served back at her.”

Deku let out a deep chuckle that you’d never heard from him before as he turned towards you, hands resting on your hips as he leaned against you more. “B-baby?”

“Mmmhmmm. Be prepared, I’m coming for you.” You swallowed as you felt yourself being pinned against the wall with Deku’s body pressed against yours, his head resting on your shoulder and breath tickling your neck. “And you’ll be coming for me soon, too.”

You felt his hands start to slide down. He chooses to be this forward now? In public?! “Wait, wait! Midoriya…I-I…” You reached out to push him back slightly only for him to fall to his knees in front of you. “Midoriya?” His eyes were shut and he let out a small snore, peacefully asleep while your heart was still pounding in your chest.

[thefangirlslair]

Free At Last (A Sasusaku One-Shot Fanfiction) x Purple Love VI

Note: Okay, okay. I know it’s been a while. I’ve been busy not being completely mental because of some stuff, and then this corona virus comes up and just messes up with my head furthermore. Ugh! Well, I hope you’re all safe and doing well. And of course, enjoy Sakura Day! It is our queen’s birthday, and I know i’ll never forgive myself if i don’t participate on her special day. So i hope you appreciate this one because i took a break from angst and tried a light and fluffy one. I am sO NERVOUS OMG thanks so much to everyone who keeps on reading these fics i have. Thank u thank u!!!

PS. This is also up on my ffnet! Let me know your thoughts! Again, Happy Birthday Uchiha Sakura!!!!!!!!!! MY QUEEN I LOB U

-

Excerpt:  This might be her second birthday since he knew her, first as her boyfriend, but he feels like he’s known her for a long time. He wants to be there on her birthday every year, forever, as long as she’ll have him.

--

SasuSaku Pairing (2,578 words)

A Poor Attempt at Writing Fics

Sasusaku Edition XXV

Free At Last

Not even grainy resolutions of webcam cameras and shitty internet connections can ever hide her wide-blown grin. May it be over a monitor, your smartphone or in person, Haruno Sakura’s smile will always be as beautiful as its owner. And it’s even much brighter now that her team is singing her happy birthday through her computer screen.

Boisterous laughter followed after all the singing because was that Lee-san who croaked that last note?

“That was awful, Eyebrows!”, laughed Naruto, some dramatic tears leaking from the corners of his happy blue eyes and his tongue slipping the familiar nickname outside work. “Was that you or you have a pet frog?” The addressed man cannot be seen beyond his webcam because he was busy lying under his desk because Sakura-san! I have failed to sing the best happy birthday song! Shame on me!

Almost choking on her drink, Tenten interrupted, “Hey Naruto, we’re still technically at work even though we’re working from home. Stop with the nicknames until later!”

“C’mon, buns! It’s not as if Boss is here to murder us with his glare! And it’s just another 10 minutes before our shift ends; we need to celebrate Sakura-chan's birthday at least!”, the blond whined as an answer.

“Aww, thanks so much guys!”, Sakura smiled. “Naruto, stop teasing Lee-san. And listen to Tenten, we still need to be professional while we’re still at work. I wish we are together at the office though! I would’ve loved to celebrate with you all, too.”

Another blue-eyed, blonde person answered. “Ugh, tell me about it. I’d rather be at the office right now and listen to Naruto’s obnoxious voice than be with a lazy ass and be bored out of my mind like someone over here..” Ino’s annoyed face and an even more annoyed voice rang through their earphones and speakers, noting the emphasis on some words about her boyfriend who rolled his eyes. In the background, you can hear Tenten’s Language!

They can all see Shikamaru, the boyfriend, who simply smirked, looked sideways at his workmate/girlfriend and lazily drawled, “You love this lazy ass.”

Series of ‘OHHHHHH’ can be heard from Kiba, Tenten and Naruto while Lee choked some more and laid again under his desk. Sakura just laughed at her best friend’s face because Ino was trying so hard not to blush that she covered her almost-red face and slapped Shikamaru’s arm at reach. Sakura even heard the man chuckled under his breath.

“Shika, you smooth fucker,” Kiba teased. “Teach us your ways!”

Tenten growled, “Inuzuka, if you don’t shut the fuck u-”

“Weren’t you the one who said to remain professional and mind our language while at work, Tenten-san?”, Lee’s head came up to peek onto the camera and asked his innocent question. He ducked again when the brunette’s eyes flashed for a second and escaped before she unleashes her rage on him.

Sakura’s laughter was light and happy, her green eyes sparkling with mirth. These people’s faces on her screen belong to not just her team at work but her friends. Her second family. Or maybe third? she thought.

They spend more than 40 hours a week together whether it be stressing over clients at work, drinking coffee at the pantry, pizza parlor visits after shift, and ice creams every payday. And now that she realized that it has been two long months since they worked from home, now at their last day of quarantine, let alone on her birthday, she misses them. Terribly so.

“I miss you guys. Really,” she said, her voice a bit lower than usual, which means she’s serious. Her friends saw it and immediately stopped their bickering. “I didn't have anyone before until Naruto and Ino came along. Then came Tenten, then Shikamaru... until Kiba and then lastly, Lee-san. It’s been 10 years since my first celebration with the blonds, but I feel like I’ve been celebrating it with all 7 of you ever since.” She smiled again, “Thank you for always being with me on my day.”

A few moments passed and finally, a chorus of incomprehensible words were heard through Sakura’s speakers because they all reacted at the same time:

“Sakura-chaaan! Don’t be sad! I’ll be sad too!”

“Cut... hik... cut the drama f-forehead! I d-.. I don’t want it!... hik...”

“Ah... now you want me to fall for you now, huh? Stop, damn it Sakura..”

“Girl, don’t touch my fucking heart like that. You already know we got you always.”

“SAKURA-SAAAAAAAAAN!!!”

Sakura watched it all with glowing eyes and a full heart. She looked one by one on their blurry little faces and she felt love just seep through her pores. She’s finally seeing them next week since the quarantine is finally over and there will be no need to hide from the pandemic that affected the rest of the world.

They’re still busy reeling over Sakura’s mini birthday speech and the rosette is overwhelmed with emotions when they heard Shikamaru asked, “Seven?”

“Huh?”, Sakura confusedly asked back.

“We’re only six here, excluding you, but you said ‘all 7 of you’ earlier.”

All eyes turned to her and she felt nervous. Crap, I slipped!

“Oh,” she started, nervously added an awkward laugh. “I meant six! I might be more tired than usual then. We had to talk to a lot of clients today anyway, right?”

She knew she didn’t convince Shikamaru and the rest of her friends, so she thanked all the deities she knew when her phone rang and Kakashi’s name flashed on her screen. She took it as an opportunity to escape more questions from them and so she said, “I gotta take this call, it’s my old high school teacher.”

She muted their audio of their conference call and opened the window of her emails instead to hide her screen and chat box. Sakura went to the balcony to answer the call.

Little did she know that she forgot to turn off her camera.

--

“Did you notice she was acting weird?”

“She absolutely did, right? She looked nervous earlier. Do you know something about this, Naruto?”

“No! She tells us everything but for the past few months, she’s been a little secretive, I think. It also doesn’t help that we’ve been in quarantine for 2 months! Is she still my best friend, Ino-chan?”

“First of all, I am her best friend and not you. And second, I agree. Ugh, this Forehead is making my head hurt!”

“Don’t judge Sakura-san! She’s a good friend! If she wants to tell us something, she will!”

“I don’t care about her secret or whatever, all I want to know where her house is because look at her room. So fucking huge!”

“That’s not her house, Kiba. Forehead said she’s staying at her mom’s friend because she’s alone at her apartment.”

“Yeah, Sakura-chan's room is much brighter and full of flowers! The room they gave her now is so boring, look! It’s either black or gray!”

“I wouldn’t mind. The size of that room is almost as big as my entire apartment. That bed looks something I want to break with Neji.”

“Tenten-san!! Control yourself!!!”

“Y’all are so noisy even in chat.”

“Shut up, ponytail!”

A movement from Sakura’s camera caught everyone’s attention. Her computer is located at the corner of the room so they could see a part of the queen size bed and has a direct view of the bedroom door. The knob turned and someone entered the room.

“WHO’S THAT?!!!”

“SOMEONE ENTERED SAKURA-SAN'S ROOM!!”

“Is that her mom’s friend?”

“Stop panicking idiots!”

“THEY BETTER LEAVE SAKURA-CHAN ALONE!!!”

“Wait...”

“Is that....?”

“OHMYFGOFDD”

“IS THAT BOSS TEME???!”

“Holy shit..”

“Damn he’s so fucking hot in sweatpants...”

“Why is he there??????”

“UCHIHA-SAN IS IN SAKURA-SAN'S ROOM!!!!!”

“I see... this could be why Sakura said 7.”

“NOOOO! THIS CAN’T BE! SAKURA-CHAN WON’T DATE THAT ASSHOLE! SHE CAN’T!!”

Stood inside the room is no other than their young CEO, Uchiha Sasuke, dressed in casual gray sweatpants and thin white t-shirt. If not because of his wild black hair and intimidating aura, they wouldn’t even know it’s him. They have always seen him in crisp suits and perfect posture, maybe once in a bomber jacket and ripped jeans, but this is the first time they’ve seen him in comfortable clothes with his usual stiff shoulders a bit relaxed and his hands casually tucked in his pockets.

Another movement from the other corner of the room, and Sakura came into view. They didn’t know she was only wearing a big shirt that barely covered her thighs, and the chat room exploded again.

“Sakura’s so hot, damn..”

“HOY DOG-BREATH, LOOK AWAY!!! STOP HOUNDING SAKURA-CHAN!!”

“YAAAS GET THAT ASS GIRL!!”

“I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS! FOREHEAD IS BANGING OUR BOSS! THAT’S SO HOT”

They watched in awe when the two met in the middle of the room and Sakura tiptoed and wrapped her arms around Sasuke’s neck. Their boss leaned down and held her hips, his face hidden within her pink locks.

The scene didn’t have any audio for their mini audience but even without it, they know the two are speaking in whispers, with Sakura’s head nodding and Sasuke’s hands running over her waist and back as indications. They felt like intruders and most of them almost blushed because of the affection and intimacy, excluding one who definitely passed out under his desk, so they decided to leave the two.

“Let’s leave them alone now, things might get pretty hot. I don’t wanna see my best friend shagging my boss, no matter how proud I am of her.”

“INO-CHAN! WE GOTTA HELP SAKURA-CHAN ESCAPE! WHAT IF HE’S HOLDING HER HOSTAGE???”

“Idiot..”

“Sakura can take me hostage any time though..”

“Wait, I just want to see Boss Uchiha topless before we go!”

--

Sasuke pulled away for a bit to look at Sakura, his birthday girl, and poked her forehead with his two fingers. His two arms wrapped around her waist again after the gesture, “Are you done for today?”

She nodded in affirmative as her hands roam around his shoulders and looped around his neck, “I almost slipped earlier though. They almost knew I have a b-..boyf-”

He smirked. They have been secretly dating for almost 4 months now but she still blushes more than usual when she tries to address him as her boyfriend. He remembered the time he introduced her to his parents as his girlfriend and she was redder than his favorite fruit the entire dinner. That was fun.

She’s his employee, he knows. Sakura’s been working for his company for more than a year now and ever since he laid his eyes on her and saw her potential, wit and charm—he knows she’s his endgame.

It’s been a long pursuit for him, being her boss and all, and her righteous perspective about everything. So when she finally gave in to her own feelings and decided to say yes to being his, he decided to never let Haruno Sakura go. Even if she decides to fight tooth and nail for her freedom from him, he will do the same to keep her. Maybe not as an employee, because that would mean he will be free to take her on lunch dates, but as his lover.

I like that, he thought. Lover.

Sasuke peered at her blushing face, her emerald eyes downcast because of embarassment, her enticing full pink lips on display that she keeps on licking and biting. Sasuke’s eyes twitched because of the sight.

“Annoying,” he almost growled under his breath. Is she aware of her effect on him?

Before she could even ask, Sasuke ducked his head down to press his mouth on hers. His hand went to the back of her head to tilt it a little upwards so he could taste deeper and he was rewarded by the opening of her mouth and the quiet moan that he drank greedily from her.

As much as he wants to call it a night and just bury himself with her and in her, she hasn’t eaten yet because his hard-headed and annoying employee still worked at home on her birthday. He baked a strawberry cake downstairs while she thought he’s busy working with investors on his office. He spent the entire day in his kitchen Facetiming with his mother to guide his baking. He’s never seen his mother so ecstatic because of him.

He came back to his senses when he felt slightly cold hands under his shirt and he fought the urge to throw her onto the bed they have been occupying for the past 2 months of quarantine and just ravish her all night. Sasuke moved both his hands and held her face as he savored more of her lips by a few flicks of his tongue before he gently pulled away.

This might be her second birthday since he knew her, first as her boyfriend, but he feels like he’s known her for a long time. He wants to be there on her birthday every year, forever, as long as she’ll have him. “Happy birthday,” he simply said, tenderly looking at her gorgeous face.

Her smile was blinding and her green irises glimmer against the setting sun. “Thank you, Sasuke-kun,” Sakura softly answered. “I love you so much.”

He pecked her lips again, lingering a bit more, and murmured against her mouth. “Love you.” He felt her smile, and he smiled back.

A small blink from the corner of his eyes got his attention and he noticed the tops of her laptop’s screen with a little light, indicating that the camera is on. Sasuke turned to Sakura, “Go downstairs and wait for me. Let’s eat dinner. I’ll just take a shower.”

Sakura nodded and happily skipped across the room and slipped outside the bedroom to wait for him downstairs. Sasuke stood for a moment looking at the door and slowly walked toward his, their, dresser. He took off his t-shirt and tossed it carelessly on the floor. He took a deep breath and finally approached Sakura’s computer on the side.

He clicked the program that runs the conference call and was greeted by her team’s shocked faces. He saw one window where Rock Lee was supposed to be but he didn’t see anyone aside from the crooked angle of the camera and are those his feet under the table? He scoffed inwardly. Guess you’ll give up pursuing her now. She’s mine.

He did a lazy sweep of his dark eyes one by one on their faces and remembered them in the future if they decide to blame Sakura for not telling this secret. Of course, they both wanted to show the world that they’re together but they still need to be a little cautious. Yes, they’re her friends and her team, but he’s not gonna be lenient especially when it comes to Sakura.

Sasuke thought the look in his eyes were effective because they all sat a little straighter. His job is now done, and now it’s time to shower so he could celebrate the entire night with Sakura. His spine tingled in anticipation.

He looked directly at the little camera above and gave his signature smirk before he logged out her account and closed Sakura’s laptop. He stretched like a feline and his grin went wider as he stripped for his shower.

Let’s just say it was an interesting first day back at the office the following Monday.

--

~fin~

[bittywitches]

Take Your Time (Grayson Dolan Fanfic)

A/N: This is basically me becoming super obsessed with the idea of husband!Grayson and I wanted to write a cute husband and wife thing rlly badlyyy  >.<

The idea is y/n is working at this newspaper but there’s an opening for a more executive position and she has to do this application for it which she’s super stressed out about. Grayson is there to help her feel a little better :)

(oh btw do y’all want me to do word counts? idk lmk)

Anyways thank you babies for reading ily <3

The click of the door shutting after a long day of work was really what Grayson needed to hear. 

He was absolutely exhausted, as he spent the entire day showing this one particularly annoying couple multiple downtown houses that seemed to fit their requests only for them to conclude with the idea that they’d rather get an apartment instead. 

He kicked off his shoes and sighed deeply, stretching out his back. His feet ached from having to walk the two to so many different residences, but either way, he was getting paid for it.

“Babe, I’m home!”

“Hi, honey!”

Grayson followed his wife’s voice and found her in the office room sitting cross-legged in the wheely chair. Her hair was up in a messy bun, and she was wearing a loose T-shirt and checkered pajama pants. 

“How’s the most gorgeous girl in LA doing?” He threw his jacket and bag onto the armchair.

“Awful.” She swiveled around to face him and had her arms stretched out reaching for him. He hugged her, rubbing her back, and gave her a kiss on the cheek.

“How come, baby?”

“Ugh, it’s this stupid application stuff.” She turned back around to the computer. Grayson pulled up a chair and sat beside her.

“What’s the issue?”

“That’s the thing, I don’t know!” She threw her hands up in the air. “It’s like anything I write, there’s just something wrong with it that I can’t put my finger on. I swear, I’ve written like seven versions of this exact same article.”

“It’s probably just the stress of having to get it done for tomorrow.” He rubbed her arm. “Don’t be too hard on yourself.”

She sighed. “But this article has to be perfect. This job could mean so much to me, I’d finally be able to have so much more control on the paper’s projects.” She looked over at him. “I really think I can do some good for this company. So I really don’t want to screw this up. It’s probably going to be my only chance.”

Grayson got up and kissed her on the forehead. “Whatever you write, they’re going to absolutely love it. I promise.”

She smiled. “Thank you, baby.”

He returned it. “I’m gonna go change. Have you eaten yet?”

“No, lost track of time.”

“Want me to make something?”

“Don’t worry about it, you’re probably tired from work.” She grabbed his arm. “Oh! Speaking of, how did it go with that couple?”

Grayson rolled his eyes. “I don’t want to distract you from your work, but to give you the short answer: not the greatest.”

“Aw, bub.”

“It’s okay. I’ll tell you about it after. Want me to heat up the leftover lasagna?”

“Yes, please.”

“You got it.”

...

A few minutes later, Grayson was in the kitchen, getting the leftovers from last night out of the fridge. He’d changed into an old T-shirt and sweatpants. 

He put the food in the microwave and started it. He yawned, stretching his arms above his head, groaning a little bit. He leaned against the kitchen island. 

Y/N had been working on this application for the past few days, and Grayson had to admit, he was glad it would be done by tomorrow. He obviously wanted her to get the job she wanted, but he hated how much it was stressing her out. He hadn’t had much time himself to help her out since his job had been taking up a lot of his time the past week. He wanted to do something special to relax her, but time sometimes just got the best of him.

He did love how passionate she was about writing, though. She worked so hard, it made him feel motivated to do more too. He just wished she would give herself a moment to breathe every once in a while. But then again, that is what he was there for.

He had started to fiddle with his wedding ring, which he tended to do quite often whenever he got lost in thought. It was a simple piece of jewelry, contrasting quite a bit to his father’s. It was a simple silver band, engraved with the initials of both his and her name. It was probably one of his favourite things in the whole world because it made it feel like she was always with him even when she wasn’t. 

He smiled to himself, thinking how, just three years before, he dreamed of spending the rest of his life with Y/N. And now he was.

“Babe, come eat!” He shouted.

“Yea, in a minute...”

“Gorgeous come on, you need to eat.” He took the plates out of the microwave and set them onto the dining table.

“I gotta finish this Gray...”

Grayson walked back to the office room. “Baby, what did you eat for lunch?”

“Uhh.. stuff..” she was completely concentrated on her article.

“Y/N.” he spun the chair around, jerking her away from her somewhat trance-like state.

“Honey, please! I need to get this done!”

“You don’t have to starve yourself to do that!”

She groaned. “Babe I don’t have time-“

“Y/N. come eat.” He grabbed her wrists, trying to pull her up.

She narrowed her eyes at him. “I hate you.”

“I love you too, gorgeous.” He pulled her up and kissed her. She finally stopped straining against him and relaxed against his touch.

She pulled away. “I really missed you today.”

Grayson sighed. “I know. I’m sorry.” He wrapped his arms around her waist and she stretched hers around his neck. “I missed you too.”

She smiled a bit. “You know, we should go out this weekend. We haven’t done that in a while.” She played with the hair on the back of his head.

“Yea? What do you have in mind?”

“I don’t know. Just something.” She kissed him again, then let go. “Okay, come on. I’m starving.”

The pour of the water from the tap as Grayson cleaned the dishes was just overshadowed by the sound of the television in the living room. He rinsed off the dirty plates and set them on the rack. 

“Hey, hon, how’s Ethan doing? Did you call him today?”

“Yea, he’s good.” He wiped his hands off on the rag and made his way over to the sofa where Y/N was sitting. “I’m glad you decided to take a break.”

She rolled her eyes as Grayson sank into the seat beside her. “Only because I’m basically done and just have to edit.”

“Mmm, either way.” He kissed her cheek.

“What’d Ethan say?”

“He just said we should all hang out soon. Maybe this weekend.”

She jerked her head to face him. “But I thought we were going to-“

“And I told him that we were busy,” she rubbed her arm. “So maybe we could meet up for dinner another time.”

Y/N smiled. “I’m sorry. You probably wanna hang out with him. It’s been like four days since you guys have been able to actually do anything together. That’s like a century for you guys.”

Grayson laid back, and Y/N nuzzled herself up against his chest. “It’s been a rough week for both of us. I think we need some time just together too.” He rubbed her shoulder and kissed her temple.

She sighed. “What did I do to deserve someone like you?”

“You stole my heart, that’s what you did.”

“Yeah well...” she laid her head against his chest, listening to his heartbeat. “You never asked for it back.”

He brushed his fingers through her strands of hair. “That’s because I wished you’d take the rest of me too.”

She blushed. “Well lucky for you then, huh?”

“Oh yeah.”

Y/N took his hand that was laying on his stomach. “I love you, baby.”

“I know.”

She slapped his stomach, sitting up abruptly. “Grayson Dolan!”

He laughed. “Oh, I’m kidding princess.” He cupped her cheeks in his hands. “I love you so much. I’ll never be able to show you just how much I do.”

He leaned in and kissed her. Soft, but meaningful.

Y/N suddenly pulled away. “Oh my god, my article!” She got up, but Grayson grabbed her wrist.

“Noooo, stayyy baby girl.”

“Oh my god, you literally kill me.” She pulled away from him. “But I have to work babe. Just keep watching the show, Okay?”

“I literally forgot the Tv was even on.” He gave her big puppy dog eyes.

“Give me a half-hour.”

“But snuggles!”

“Babyyy.”

“Oh, fine. Okay.”

An hour later, Gray walked into the office room with two cups of tea. He knocked on the side of the door. “Am I intruding?”

Y/N finally looked away from her screen. “Hm? Oh, no not at all.”

Gray handed her one of the cups, and she took it gratefully. “Mmm, thank you.”

“Are you going to be done anytime soon?”

She stretched. “I actually think I’m about done.”

“Great, can we go to bed?”

She shook her head. “I was wondering if you could read it over?”

“Oh of course baby,” he placed his cup on the table and swiveled over to her. “What do you want me to do?”

“I don’t know. Just review it, tell me if it sounds weird, if it’s not going for the vibe I’m looking for, even just grammatical stuff. I’ve been staring at this thing for so long I think it just needs a fresh pair of eyes.”

“You got it. Just bear with me, I’m a really slow reader.”

“Take your time honey.”

After a few minutes, Grayson looked back over to his wife, who was sitting in the armchair. 

“It looks really good honey. Just, okay c’mere a sec..”

“Mhm.” She walked Over to the computer.

“You see this part? You could talk less about it but focus more on what’s in the next paragraph.”

“Hmm, ok yea I see that.”

“Also this part-“ he scrolled down. “It’s like a lot of information all at once. It’s like, too dense. You get what I mean?” 

She pulled a chair over, skimming over the section. “Yeaa, your right.” She dragged the laptop over to her and started typing something up. “Is this better?” She pushed it back over to him.

“Yes, this is a lot easier to follow. Just do that with the next part too, and I think it’ll be better.”

“Ok. Thank you so much, baby.” 

Grayson got up and moved his chair over so Y/N could reposition herself. “No problem, hon.” He kissed her forehead.

“I'm gonna go wait for you in bed, okay?”

“Alright.”

“Don’t stay up too late.”

“I won’t.”

Another hour later, Grayson shuffled back over to the office room once more. He’d almost fallen asleep but was determined to stay awake until his wife was done. 

He rubbed his eye and yawned. “Babe I think it’s time to just let it be done. You must be exhausted-“

Grayson stopped when he saw the small figure of Y/N laying her head down on the table, completely passed out.

“Aw, honey..”

He tiptoed over to her, listening to her soft breathing. The light from the screen illuminated her hair and bounced off of the now empty cup of tea she finished. She was sleeping on top of many papers and files. He looked up at the screen and saw the email she had drafted to send her application in. He sat down next to her for a bit, and opened up the documents she had attached, making sure all of them were there and skimming through them to make sure they were ready to go. He quickly finished it up for her, just adding some thanks and signing her name, and sent it.

“Y/N?” He rubbed her back slowly. “You wanna come to bed now?” He chuckled to himself.

“Mmmm.”

“You never listen to me, so you?” He reached under her arms and legs and gently lifted her up bridal style. She groaned slightly, but she only seemed to stir slightly to muzzle herself closer into Grayson’s chest.

He shook his head. “You are so adorable.”

He walked back to their bedroom and gently placed her onto the bed, covering her up with the blanket. She grabbed the nearest pillow and squeezed it. He kissed her on the forehead. 

“Goodnight, baby.”

Two weeks later, Y/N was idly scrolling through her phone while Grayson was making dinner when suddenly she got a notification from her email. She opened it to find...

“OH MY GOD!”

A clang was heard in the kitchen, like something falling onto the ground, and was followed by Grayson racing out of the kitchen. 

“WHAT? What’s wrong?”

Y/N jumped up from the couch and turned her phone screen to Grayson, jumping up and down. 

“OH MY FUCKING GOD I GOT THE JOB!”

His terrified expression was quickly replaced with one of excitement. “Oh my god, Congrats baby!” He spread his arms wide and Y/N ran towards him, practically jumping onto him to give him a hug. 

“Oh my god oh my god oh my god I can’t believe I got the job!!”

“I’m so proud of you baby!!” He picked her up into the air and spun her around while she squealed.

“I can’t believe this is actually happening.” She pulled away from him to read the email in her phone again, her face absolutely glowing.

“You deserve it, hon. You worked so hard for this.” He smiled, then his eyes lit up. “OH my god, we need to celebrate!”

Y/N grabbed his face and kissed him, startling him so bad he almost fell backward. She pulled away from him, grinning like a fool.

“Or, you know. That works too.” He chuckled.

She laughed as well. “Grayson, I never would’ve been able to get this job without you.”

His arms made their way around her. “What are you talking about? You did this all on your own.”

“False. Without you, I probably would’ve killed myself before I got it done.” The edge of Grayson’s mouth quirked up, but he let her continue. “You were so supportive the past few weeks, and I really needed it. Thank you. So much.”

The warmth of his forehead pressed against hers spread through her. “I’m always going to be here for you, Y/N. that’s what you get for deciding to marry me.”

Her fingers grazed his jawline. “Well, I guess I made a good decision then, huh?”

“Mhmm.” He leaned and kissed her once more. The warmth and flavour of his lips spread through her. Her arms made their way up into his hair, then she bit his lip, making him moan.

She smirked. “You know, there is something we could do to celebra-“ a loud beeping noise suddenly disrupted her, and she watched as Grayson’s eyes suddenly widened.

“Oh my god the food!” He let go of Y/N and rushed back into the kitchen, followed by her Y/N’s laughs. A loud clang was heard, probably him dropping the steaming pot into the sink, then Grayson peaked his head around the corner.

“So.. how’re you feeling about take-out?”

She rolled her eyes. “Yea yea. I’ll order.”

[cheshiremadd]

Superfluous

AO3

Chapter 2 A flashback already?!

-

sometime late last year

Chat found her at Patrol Starting Spot #13, looking for all the world like she intended to become this generation’s Thinker statue. She didn’t turn her head or acknowledge him as he approached. Even when he took a seat beside her, she stared resolutely forward.

He slowly leaned against her, giving her the opportunity to pull away. He gave her his full weight when she didn’t, putting his chin on her shoulder. “What’s the matter, Bug? Wanna talk about it?”

She stayed quiet. Chat gave her a bit of a head nudge and prompted again. “Or I could talk about my problems? They are many, and I can make more when I run out.”

“Love problems.” It was a soft warning, her accompanying shrug saying that he could give the conversation a pass if he wanted.

Chat, though, apparently liked pain and heartache. So of course he pressed on. “Ah, trouble with the boyfriend? Wonder Boy not everything he’s cracked up to be?”

And, wow, that wasn’t exactly how he meant for that to come out. They’d talked a lot about boundaries and relationships in general, and their boundaries and relationship specifically, and he hoped she knew that wasn’t meant to be a dig.

“I wouldn’t say we progressed to the ‘boyfriend and girlfriend’ stage.” She trailed off. Scrubbed her face with her hands, and blew out a gust of air. She waved a hand, and Chat took his cue. He flopped away from her, keeping his butt in the same spot beside her but laying back across the rooftop.

“Oh, LB, I’ve got a big problem.” He ran his claws through the part of his hair that he could reach without moving too much. “So I don’t think I told you that my girlfriend and I broke up.”

Ladybug gasped and looked his way. “Oh, Chat. I’m so sorry.”

He waved her off. “Eh, don’t be. It kind of sucked, but it was very mutual. We both decided that we were better friends. She realized that, while she is- was- something interested in me, she also really likes women. And I realized that- well..”

He huffed.

“Look, I am not telling you all this so I can get another ‘I told you so’.” His hand mimicked a talking puppet with the phrase. He was very tired of it by now, thank you very much.

She pushed her arms in the air, stretching her back, and then leaned back with her arms to prop her up. “I won’t give you one if you’ll refrain from using it on me.”

“Deal. My good friend that I apparently talk about too much? She got a boyfriend right before we broke up. He’s a mutual and honestly a real nice guy. Very chill.”

Ladybug gave him a knowing look. She could already tell where this was going. She knew him too well, just like he knew her. He sighed.

“Yeah. I hated seeing the two of them together. Hate. Ongoing thing. Problem not resolved. I was -am- so jealous, and I didn’t understand why because I had just the tiniest crush on her, not a big deal, not any bigger than anyone else who knows this woman. Seriously, Bug, everyone who ever meets her gets at least a small crush on her. It’s a fact of life. Minus, you know, those who aren’t female attracted.”

She finally allowed herself to relax all the way back, laying on her side facing Chat. “I know someone like that.”

“Yeah?”

“Mm-hmm,” she nodded. “She’s kind. Very strong. Bold and determined. Sometimes she messes up, but she always tries. I would have wondered if she were Ladybug, if I weren’t.”

He shot her a bright grin. Such glowing praise for his princess! “Exactly! My Lady, I almost wonder if we’re talking about the same person.”

The air between them turned somber just as quickly. “We can’t confirm it.”

A reminder that was for her as much as it was for him.

“I know.”

Silence fell between them, the world as quiet as it was noisy. A city as big as Paris always had some activity going on, and this building was on a busier road. It was several minutes before Ladybug prodded him.

“So. Crush not as tiny as you previously thought?”

He covered his eyes with his forearm. Hoped against hope that the ground would just swallow him. “Noooo. Plagg was actually helpful for once. He suggested comparing my feelings for- well. To be perfectly candid, my Lady, he suggested comparing my feelings for each of you. And I-”

He sighed.

“I don’t even know when I started to love her.” The declaration came out softly. It still felt like betrayal to utter it. “I can’t think of a time where I didn’t think about her, strive for her approval, want to just..be in her presence.”

Ladybug let out a humorless laugh. “We just love to make life complicated, huh.”

She fell to her back and picked at her fingers.

“So, the jealousy is a problem?” She seemed to be grasping at whatever conversation threads she could find.

He shook his head. “No. I mean, it is. But not, like, in a way that’s going to cause problems for our relationship, or her relationship with her boyfriend. I’m doing better at keeping it a me problem.”

She turned over to lay on her belly. Buried her face in her arms.

“Did you really think she could be me?” And, yeah, she was definitely stalling.

“I considered the pawsibility once, my Lady, but I’ve seen the two of you at the same scratching post more than once. Unfurtunately for this poor Tom’s heart, it seems I’m destined to love two Queens, instead of one.” He could see her blush, which spread all the way to the tips of her ears. An interesting development. But she giggled, too, which had been his goal.

It was a long moment before she spoke again.

“I wasn’t dating Wonder Boy. I didn’t know that I’d given you that impression. He’s still as wonderful as ever.”

Oh. Yep. He could have this conversation. He would rock this conversation. He’d be the best, ever, at this conversation. He took a deep breath. She’s his best friend. He could do that for her.

“Everything was nice! My not-quite-boyfriend and I got along great. It was...calming. Easy. But my brain decided it was too easy.”

He released the breath in what he hoped was a measured way, and reached a hand over to rub between her shoulder blades. Just enough to give support without interrupting.

“I just. The anxiety wasn’t there, which was nice. But...I knew that if we ended it, I wouldn’t be heartbroken. I’d call one of my best friends and we’d use the excuse to stay up all night and eat too much ice cream. Maybe I’d cry a little. And I’d be okay the next day. He could stop being my friend, and that would honestly be awful, because he’s fun to hang around, but I know that I’d get through it.”

It was her turn to take a deep breath and let it out slowly.

“It wouldn’t be like losing Wonder Boy...or you.”

Chat stopped the motion of his hand and stared at her.

“You’re one of my needs, Chat. Right up there with food and water and shelter. And Wonder Boy...I think it’d kill me if he walked out of my life.”

And wasn’t that just what he’d always wanted her to say. He’d heard her gush about Wonder Boy, and here she was placing them on the same level. Yet. He found that he was glad she’d never said it before. He loved Marinette, and he wanted to love her.

He turned over to match her, threw an arm over her, and did his level best to bury his head in her shoulder.

What a mess.

She turned to face him more. “Why are hearts so complicated, Chat?”

He shook his head against her, still not quite able to speak.

Sometimes they defined ‘patrol’ as training. Sometimes a break from hectic lives and grabbing a bite to eat. It was helping that little old lady over on Rue Clément Marot bring her flower pots in. And sometimes it was having an emotional conversation and keeping watch for butterflies.

They stayed like that for some time. Until he had to do something to change the mood, because his first priority had to be her, had to be them, and akumatization was not an option.

“Want to hear something funny?”

She raised an eyebrow. “Is it actually going to be funny?”

“Hey! Don’t lie! You cat get enough of my humor.”

“Yay. The low-hanging fruit puns.”

Chat narrowed his eyes and scrutinized her. She looked away and picked at her thumb. One of her nervous ticks. “You stole that line from Marinette!”

“Did I? Or did Marinette steal it from me?”

He paused at that, thoughtful. “Hmm. My princess is a majestic thief. But I’m certain that was her crowning jewel before it was yours.”

“Oh, all right,” she said with a roll of her eyes. “What was your ‘something funny’?”

“I don’t know if you deserve to hear now, after such blatant thievery from the Kingdom of the Pink Lands.”

Ladybug huffed. “Fine, don’t tell me.”

He chuckled, enjoying getting a rise out of her, before he told her anyway. “I wanted to break up after I figured out how much I liked my Good Friend, and that I was happier having my ex-girlfriend as a good friend. She wanted to break up because my Good Friend was her gay awakening.”

He heard a startled laugh, and turned to see Ladybug covering her mouth with her fist. “Way to ruin the moment, Chaton.”

He shrugged, unrepentant. “It needed ruining.”

-

two and a half months ago

Adrien lay on his bed, arm propping his head up, and stared at his phone. Pictures took up the screen. Kim walking towards the camera, holding Max and Ondine’s hands. The three sitting at a cafe table, Kim making exaggerated motions to Ondine, Max forgetting the computer in front of him to stare at him with her. Ondine and Max surprising Kim by kissing his cheeks.

The caption below the three pictures read: Sassinette: Look who Kagami and I ran into!

To Adrien’s knowledge, Max and Ondine weren’t interested in dating each other. But they got along well enough, and they both loved Kim, and they were okay with (encouraged, even!) Kim to love both of them. The arrangement worked for them. And Kim didn’t have to choose.

Adrien had never imagined having this problem. When he and Kagami started dating, he hadn’t dreamed that Ladybug might have feelings for him. Even when he and Kagami split, he didn’t know. But then that conversation happened, and they’d sat on the information for months. Each of them unwilling to pursue one while they still thought about both.

And now a crazy solution presented itself. Deceptively simple, until he considered the secret identities in play. Ladybug would understand, but could he ask Marinette to be in a polyamorous relationship when he couldn’t introduce the two?

A new message came through. Marinette’s text tone was reminiscent of collecting coins in a retro video game. He chose it for her because he felt like he was gaining every time she texted him, and she rocked at video games.

Sassinette: I think Mme. Tsurugi is warming up to me. She asked about the competition that I’m prepping for?

Sassinette: I mean Kagami and I were talking about it in her hearing, and all she asked about was who was putting it on, then nodded and said ‘They’re a prominent company; worthy of your time.’

Rapunzel: That’s not ‘warming up’, Maricakes. That’s downright approval.

He still smiled when he saw his contact name. Marinette had stolen his phone and changed it in retribution for what he did to hers.

“Disney Princess, golden hair, questionable parent.” She’d ticked each point with her fingers. “All you need are the magical powers!”

Joke’s on her. I do have magical powers.

….That he needed to use soon. Joint patrol started in twenty minutes.

His phone collected more coins.

Sassinette: I’m not convinced, but I kind of only care as far as it lets Kagami hang out without the subterfuge.

Sassinette: Between you and me, we’ll convince her of the importance of socializing with one’s peers!

He covered his eyes with his free forearm and whined. If he didn’t do something soon, Kagami was going to ask her out. He just knew it. She kept saying she wasn’t going to, that Marinette didn’t like her like that, but Adrien could see how well the two of them got along. They’d make such a cute couple.

Coins again.

Sassinette: Still alive over there? I’m getting up to take a shower and find food in a few minutes, in case you come back later and wonder why I’m not answering.

His eyebrows drew together. That was odd.

Rapunzel: Those sound like things I should be doing. No dinner with the parents tonight?

Sassinette: Wednesday night is their night to work on business accounts, and my night to sleep early!

He snorted and turned to his belly, gathered a pillow in his arms to lazily prop himself up.

Rapunzel: Tell me the truth. Are you actually going to sleep?

Sassinette: Your lack of faith astounds me! Of course I’m going to sleep! ….after I finish the rough draft of this commission.

“Soft and gooey Cancoillotte, you’re still mooning over your phone?”

Adrien startled at the harsh sound of Plagg’s voice in his ear.

“What do you mean, ‘still’? I haven’t been laying here for long.” It was funny how admitting to his crush on his good friend took most of the sting out of Plagg’s teasing.

The Kwami wasn’t buying any of his bullshit. “I napped near two hours. You haven’t moved.”

“I moved! I turned over.” He indicated his new position with a grin.

“You’ll miss Bugsy if you don’t move some more. Unless we’re skipping tonight. In which case I’m going back to napping.” Plagg exaggerated his yawn.

Adrien most certainly did not yelp and tangle his feet and fall out of his bed. And if Plagg told anyone he did, well, Plagg wasn’t always a reliable source for information.

[itissadbutitsmy-life]

the funniest jokes in bfdi

flower’s announcer crusher that she just. has, and everyone else just uses it too

trying to put out a fire by holding ice cube’s recovery center over the fire so she just falls into it endlessly

every single one of yellow face’s products, including but not limited to

fork attractant, for when you need a fork but don’t have the cutlery on hand

headphones you cannot change the volume on or remove

money slips, you just write an amount on them, and it counts as legal tender

“thats a pentagon!” “yeah! like if you took my name and added ‘Tagon’!“

in like episode 2 when they all run away from something and a second later flower casually power-walks away from it instead of running

when balloony deflated and a while later cloudy flies over and goes “i cannot believe it! this is a dead body!!”

“he’s not dead, he just needs a little help thats all! (starts reinflating him too fast) but i agree, he is a hindrance when he is deflate- ohh noooo”

hollow jawbreakers that sound can come into but can’t go out of

when they stuck loser in a jawbreaker they inverted it, so they can hear him talk to himself but he cant hear anything around him

no one seems to know that thats why they can hear him

one time they all ended up in space. because of budget cuts.

actually every time budget cuts lead to something that seems way cooler than their previous stuff, like sparkly purple lasers instead of a mechanical arm to eliminate people with

the consistently bad cake at stake prizes. one time it was just a block of ice cut into six pieces. one time it was dirty shovels.

the magical die of judgement

when freesmart drove across the ocean in their van and they managed it by holding their breath and each time one of them died they just recovered them and threw their corpse out the back

golf ball messing up naming her team by saying things like “we need to be another name” and ending up on teams called Another Name and A Better Name Than That

one team was formed entirely around learning to not kill people. pillow overhears them say “youre against killing?” and goes “:D did someone say killing??”

tennis ball admonishing rocky for not knowing how to write: “no arms is no excuse”

they had to find a needle in a haystack and needle just turned herself in, successfully

when they started using a board with the points written on it on flaps of paper instead of a computer screen, but due to budget cuts, it could only display two digits per contestant, so anyone who went over 100 started immediately dropping to the bottom of the rankings

when ice cube was sleeping at the cake of stake podiums and got shot up into the air at like 3000 mph

2763

when the eliminated contestants tried to escape the loser chamber and they just rolled it off into the ocean

theyre saved because the sun rises and picks them up out of the ocean

also apparently the chamber opens for like five minutes a day for sunlight, but instead of just climbing out during that time, which they seem to be capable of doing, they do a much more convoluted thing

they were sick of four so they got rid of him by multiplying him with donut, and it worked

ruby has some really weirdly specific ideas of beauty and coaches flower

the line delivery of “killing a bubble is as easy as one, two, th(pop)” “i just learned two things about bubble: she can be su i c i d a l and she’s S O D U M B she CANT even count to T H R E E!”

a few episodes later bubble angrily shows them she CAN count to three if she lives long enough to do so, and pencil and match are both like :O :O

bubbles first line in season four is her rapidly counting to ten before getting popped

the way each team breaks their jawbreakers

8 ball just goes “MNYAH” and bites it in half

"okay black hole, do the thing”

leafy tries to use woody’s tongue to lick it open even though rocky and balloony were doing just fine using acid

iance just going ‘bwehbwehbweh’ all licking the same one

team ice cube was doing a mix of bwebwhbehbbwehbw and loudly drilling it open with naily

when four loved so hard he shot eraser off over the horizon

when they’re discussing team names in season one  and theyre all talking over each other so you cant hear what theyre saying, except match, who grabs a megaphone and screams “SMOKY HOT FIERY BUNS”

when needle made a cake and put so much yeast in it that it breached earth’s atmosphere and astronomers apparently began classing earth as part of a three planet system (”consisting of the earth, the moon, and something called ‘needles cake’”)

“it’s ice cube! and she’s shrinking?” “she’s falling”

saying “(x character)! wake up!!” when it’s unclear (to the audience) why a character looks silly or apparently isnt responding

blocky’s sleeping pose is him with his eyes wide open, sporting a big goofy grin and hugging his legs

david’s sleeping pose is him with X eyes

one time the contest was to fill a tank with water from crying, and golf ball immediately ordered tennis ball to cry. he couldn’t do it on command, so golf ball tried, and cried her first ever tear, just... her first one

when the prize was fortune cookies, the fortunes were bracelety’s notes about how much she loves ice cube

“four, where’d you get these fortunes again?” “dumpster!”

“lightning always forgets to fly, so he had to be the fake”

when they were flying paper planes and stapy accidentally stapled his teammates into theirs, and he just hovered next to it while he was talking to them before they all started to plummet

the entire scene where liy tries to use ice cube to force teardrop to talk

“i’ll hold teardrops jaw open and you wiggle her vocal chords”

“i hate you” “yeah i hate her too!” “no. i hate you.”

“ice cube will only stop when she WANTS to stop!” “i want to stop”

“YOU SAID YOU WOULD HELP ME! YOU SAID YOU WERE COOL!” “so r r y (starts wiggling)”

“ICE CUBE! I AM APPALLED!!!!!”

ice cube gets bitten and starts screaming while bracelety is yelling “YEAH ICE CUBE! I CANT HEAR YOU, LOUDER!!”

apparently everyone who hates golf ball gets physically sick when they get near her (or at least, ruby does and snowball did once he knew she was there)

blocky got eaten by a monster in episode two but it turned out the monster missed him by a bit so he was fine

taco’s teammates thought she was dead forever and wrote eulogies for her, and once they found out she was alive lollipop threw hers away, but saw kept hers because in her eyes they’re still valid!!

when things started to get dramatic in the s1 finale, and leafy called announcer on the phone and he was in a ball pit

loser’s trapped in a jawbreaker and the only thing with him is donut’s diary. the next time you see him he’s reading it furiously and it’s filled with color-coded sticky notes

pillow decided if you wave your arms it means all your “care spirit” is getting sucked out your arms and sent into space (”a true indicator that person doesn’t give a fluff”)

remote got hacked and her FIRST INSTINCT is to send the hackers a bomb

“if theres an announcer recovery center now, that means we can kill the announcer as much as we want and he’ll still come back to give us dream island!”

they ask black hole to push them in their swing and he says he can’t push, but he can pull like there’s no tomorrow

“no i can literally warp space time so that there will be no tomorrow” “yeah,h don’t do that.”

when they have a tiebreaker announcer pulls out a silk tie and goes “first team to break this tie wins”

the second time, almost before he finished speaking, snowball just reached over and ripped it in half effortlessly

“proves you don’t need frills to make a feast for the eyes!” “more like taco doesn’t need to be dead to be deceased in my eyes!!!”

they had a race where everyone on each team had their legs tied together (like a three-legged race, but with like six people on a team)

pen’s team was doing fine but he wasn’t, so they just dragged him along behind

snowball tied his team into a ball and dragged them himself, to predictable results, and wouldn’t stop until he got to the finish line even though it took him until after the sun went down

he failed, actually, and him and his team plummeted down a ravine when he passed out

“the opposite of dream island! night...nightmare moon!!”

donut stuck his arms through a one way camera to the moon (it transmits matter as well as light), and to fix the fact that his arms were on the moon and his body was on earth, he pushed the entire earth through the camera

the moon is smushed up against the earth now. it has not been resolved yet

“gelatin and firey tied their legs together and fell off” “ya, seems like the kind of thing they would do”

pencil got caught by a monster and couldnt get away, so they had to kill her so they could recover her somewhere else, and they let her pick how they did it, which lead to everyone just sawing her in half while she grinned ear to ear. she was singing too. iconic

but first, match, her best friend, started waggling a big butcher’s knife around at her going “hoohoo hoeheehee im killing pencil loookat me” and pencil said “match put your butterknife away, you have to ACTUALLY kill me”

and when they were sawing her in half bubble had the BIGGEST, most BLISSFUL grin, with her eyes half closed like a happy cat

bell asks for help making people stop climbing her string, and snowball assures her he can do it, but he’ll have to climb her string to get to them

then like twenty people followed him up

when writing utensil characters use themselves to write with

sometimes they have tiny versions of themselves (sans limbs), but sometimes they just like, pull their caps off and write with their heads

(the same scream noise they use every time a group of people screams) “HONESTLY! (grabs a new can of fork repellent from hammerspace) are you guys going to scream like that EVERY time i use up a can?”

dodecadangit

OH THANKS AN OCTADECILLION, MATCH

they were basically playing hot potato where if you look at someone who was glowing you’d catch the glow, and most teams ended up just chilling with their eyes closed, but golf ball yelled “EVERYONE GET ON MY ROCKET” and she and her team just left earth entirely

this did not stop them from catching the glow

someone’s like “the communicator dish still works” and book goes “oh,” dips a chip into the communicator dish and splashes dip everywhere, “THATS what this is?”

the, like, five minute long end-credits scene of ice cube falling off a cliff eternally

pencil tells ruby which button to press and she keeps getting it wrong, partly because NEW BUTTONS KEEP APPEARING

the poison antidote that has the side effect of making the recipient eat one other contestant

pencil coaching her teammates on how to jump higher

“MMR? I love measles, mumps, and rubella!”

“golf ball knows how to do, like, everything!” (cut to golf ball) “i don’t know how to do, like, anything”

basketball invited 8 ball to be on her team cuz they’re both balls, then 8 ball said “sure, and let’s adopt these three” in reference to three other ball characters

loser said when he was younger he used to play with a toy that was apparently only just invented an hour ago, and everyone, like 60 characters, immediately disowned him and started a turf war over the situation

“black hole, you’re strong! open this jar for me!”

(as the world is literally ending) “FLOWER! WHATAVE YOU DONE??” “i got this jar open!!!”

whenever a host dies or is otherwise put out of commission and the contestants just keep trucking along until they remember no one can get the prize if the host isn’t around to give it to them 

that time announcer used like ten negatives in a sentence 

the way announcer says “wow!” with more emotion than anything else he says? idk if it’s intentional, or even a joke, but it’s the best thing 

(slow mo) “i want to cry now, i really do”

“and i cry acid”

ruby died of sadness and book made it big by selling her remains 

when they say some line that’s just regular words in a slightly unique way, and then the line gets repeated throughout the series 

announcer accidentally-on-purpose got everyone killed, except david (who’s immune to bugs), and he had a david cloner, so he just went ahead and replaced everyone with davids in costumes

halfway through cake at stake, the original contestants show up unexpectedly and explain that they “faked their deaths! obviously.”

“ive decided to not cancel bfdi!” “aw, seriously?”

the noises david and dora make when they do things, like clattering, or sprouting leaves 

bubble and match pretending to be trees

“NO BUBBLE! TREES DONT SAY THAT!” “OH, RIGHT! FSSHHHHHH! FWWWSHH!!!!”

when nickel and coiny get close together bad things happen

“how’s the tree-climbing going?” “it’s okay, but it’d be easier if you helped. (swoop) okay, just got to the top” 

“yes! I am the first one up the tree!” “that’s NOT true, I was here FIRST” 

i guess we’ll just have to use this trebuchet tennis ball built before he died 

“wha! yhad this the HWOLE TIME, I DIDN EVEN HAVE TO CLIMB THE TREE?” “physical exertion builds character :)” 

when everyone’s begging four to bring back their dead teammates, especially saw, who lost her entire team, and four is like okay I’ll bring back one (1) person, and saw very reverently starts to ask him for her dead team leader, but grassy says “tennis ball!” and four listens to him instead, and everyone immediately starts nagging four again to bring back more important people 

leafy, about to melt ice cube down for metal scrap: “ice cube, come on down! you can be my alloy!”

they met a new character and they’re like “who is that?” and pie’s like “I dunno, try squishing it” 

“theres another one? whoa! it totally has a different texture from the first one!”

8 ball beginning every single statement with things like “although I don’t have a favorite number...” 

“I do this!” (grabs pin and turns her, screaming, into a squiggly pile of lines) “pretty cool, dontcha think?” 

“can,,,, you bring her back?” “no” (five seconds later) “HEY CHECK THIS OUT! (brings back pin)” 

pen high fived black hole and his arm spaghettified 

“what are you doing?” “im going to die!” “hi needle! he’s not going to die.”

iance was trying to dig their way up out of the ground but they couldnt because golf ball kept blocking them from the surface

“maybe theyre trying to communicate with me?” “yeah they’re telling you to stop”

“they raise a very convincing argument. BUT IT’S NOT ENOUGH!” “OH what a pain!!”

she accurately guessed the fact that there was a group of people underground running from some lava who “clearly value avoiding [golf ball] more than their own safety”

“ohhhh so THIS is golf balls idea of fun!” “(sigh)... yep”

they looked through a camera and couldn’t see donut (the zoom wasn’t adjusted) and marker went “donut’s a vampire too?” 

too???

“meh, I’ve still got other evidence”

one time the eliminated contestants got to vote who to eliminate and snowball was like “ice cube, cuz it’s really hot in the TLC and I can’t be the only one cooling it off” 

like four other people were like “oh man he’s right” and did the same thing

“wouldn’t it be cool if the last word of the last episode was the same as the first word of the first episode?” “yeah :)” 

“take. a deep breath. you know. A DEEP FRIED BREATH” 

at the end of the episode he shows up with some boiling oil and is like “LIKE THIS! ONE, (sizzling and screaming noises)” “COINY NO” 

leafy was about to throw a knife at them but watched this happen offscreen with horror and then left them alone

david’s human, and that’s just weird

“im still mad you killed bubble” “youre one to talk, you were about to impale TWO WHOLE teams” “yeah, but bubble’s life? is special”

pen’s like “okay we three need to stick together while we’re picking teams!” but then eraser hears some other team has free food, so he runs off and pen very flatly goes “okay, we lost eraser.”

“well let’s not pick pen, he’s still two hundred bigintillion dollars in debt” which is mostly hilarious without the first three seasons of context, but even with context it’s hilarious. he looks so shamefaced when they say it too. i love pen

once someone finally picks him he IMMEDIATELY perks up and takes charge

the hphprcc went into self destruct mode and everyone started frantically trying to figure out what to do, and book’s like “okay it’ll either just disappear without a trace, or blow up and kill us all, 50/50 chance” and then of course, it exploded, and ruby started screaming, and then book was like “ruby, stop hallucinating! see? it just disappeared, without a trace!”

“YOuuOURE HalLUCINAATING!!” “DON’T do that!! it is K-R-E-P!”

pin tried to knock everyone off the eiffel tower by shaking it and book was like “who does she think she’s kidding? it’s the eiffel tower we won’t fall off”

“name ONE! name ONE friend you haven’t gotten extremely angry at!” “thats not fair,! there isnt even any of them!”

8ball was saying the opposite of everything golf ball was saying, up to and including calling the members of their team, a better name that that, “worse namers”

“is this because i killed you last episode?” “what?? no, i dont care about that!”

“life is CHEAP! get me a BANANA!!!”

flower bit off half of announcer’s head and he couldn’t make the K sound anymore

“have this -ashew” “bless you”

“no i said -ashew. -ashew. -ashew. -ashew.” “wow you must be allergic to something”

“maybe announcer’s allergic to this cashew? here bubble, you can have it!”

pencil won the staring contest because david’s allergic to sunrises

freesmart was making video diaries during the three year hiatus, but apparently did absolutely no editing or even rewatching of the videos, because they found out three years too late that ruby left the lens cap on every time she used the camera

when four played the cake at stake song in the classroom he played it on a low-quality portable tv instead of cutting to a fullscreen video

“iknowafasterway!” “NORUBYYOULLDIE!”

pin said she didnt want to halve the votes she got because she hadnt done anything that would make people want to vote for her, and it immediately cut to a series of old scenes of her throwing people under the metaphorical bus

literally nothing is funnier than “i mean, i havent done anything to make people vote for me” (cut to flashback) “there’s too much weight on this sinking ship!!! we need to throw someone OVERBOARD!!!!”

one team got stuck doing their nine-piece puzzle for a MONTH because all the pieces were the same dark brown color

the pieces were upside down

a month

“the finish line! it’s only twenty or so yards away!”

two people talking and using the word “needy” twice and pausing to throw their hands up protectively and go “HNnnnynGH”

“why do i have filling, but also a hole?” - donuts diary

in 5b theyre talking to some npcs and theyre like “well dont hurt us, because we just got finished being punished in lego brick’s dungeon” and the npcs were like “oh yeah he does that. he’s a great guy, but he does that.”

also in 5b when book met lego brick the FIRST thing she asked is if he’s “safe to look at” which,???

they did a trivia contest and multiple questions were in complete gibberish

presumably this is an actual language in canon since like three other people answered correctly, also in gibberish, but still

“you’ve got this, bubble, you’re great at mental contests” “question one: ooba grooba, grooba shmooba?” “HUH?”

“but tennis ball -- oh... tennis ball....--”

team naming, especially in season four

“we’re not ALL in the alliance!” “well, if you take ‘the all’ out of the alliance, you get...”

“and what is your name?” (everyone says their own actual names at once)

ice cube is not on team ice cube

Death Prevention And Creating Trust

“let’s be called The Losers!” “awww! you didn’t have to”

wheel ooze a hole bunch. WOAH bunch!

“but then it sounds like youre saying free-DUMB!” “and we are so like totally not dumb!”

when the losers decided to use iance’s idea to win the swing contest and it was styled like an overenthusiastic science video 

“WHOA!!! iance just had a RADICAL idea!!!”

“TREASON! TREASON! TREASON!” “im in what?”

“seriously why are so many people drowning? it’s not even quicksand, or anything” - announcer, responding to five people drowning in a basket of bread

they were whispering with “susuusus” noises and cloudy whispered “zuzuzuzzuz”

the spaceship with the sign that says “this spaceship runs on big squishy contestants” or whatever and after the credits it slowly flips over to say “this spaceship runs on VOTERS”

“stop shooting at me!” “no way! i got these cannonballs on sale and IM GONNA GET MY MONEYS WORTH!!!”

eggy and cake’s argument over who has a deeper spiritual connection with loser

“my connection is so strong that when i crack, i bleed loser’s COLOR”

playing catch with a star they plucked out of the big dipper, and leafy’s horror over it

adding “ey” to people’s names (personal favorites are announcery, fourty-four, flowey, treey, and belly)

blueberries are EXPLOSIVE, including the ones inside pie, so sometimes she just explodes

“but over a year ago, four said you dont need frills to make a feast for the eyes, so that means hes okay with trash!”

the anti-advertisements advertisement!

four ate a whole team and they just sort of stood around inside him sticking their arms out his mouth and laughing hysterically

“again! again again again !!!!”

“we could be leaving!” “yeah, but when’s the last time you saw remote this happy? this is good for her!”

book, three episodes into season 3: hey, what is it we’re even battling for?

(iconic voice): dwream island,??

when they had a beauty contest and firey speaker box and flower speaker box just immediately chose firey and flower to be the winners without a second’s hesitation

“book! come help us catch a criminal!” “no thanks, im good!”

donut tried to punish people for getting the wrong answers when he was hosting, but it turns out a recording of four screeching doesn’t work... quite as well as the real deal

four zapping gelatin

ok ok ok this is insanely long but please add more if u have any favorites i missed

[colbybrocksmolder]

Blue - Colby Brock x Reader - Part 2/3

Part 1...

*** end of last chapter ***

“How’s it going so far?” Jake quietly asked, sitting on the coffee table facing Colby. 

“Terrifyingly easy.” Colby answered, looking down and finding Ivy fast asleep. 

“Well that’s a good thing, right?”, Jake said. “Y/n seems to fit right in. Her and Tara are bonding over SpongeBob memes as we speak.” 

“That’s the terrifying part.” Colby said, gently brushing Ivy’s hair out of her face. “They’re here for a month. They’ve only been here for like 7 hours and I’m already sad that they’re going to leave.” 

Jake watched Colby gazing down at the tiny sleeping figure in his arms. “I don’t know, brother. You’re usually a loner that likes his space. You might be happy when you’ve got your apartment back”, Jake laughed. 

Colby just sighed. *what the fuck am I getting myself into?* he thought to himself. 

*** start of new chapter ***

“All done!” Tara said, her and Y/n walking out of the spare room.

“I knew she was going to crash soon.” Y/n laughed, seeing Ivy once again asleep on Colby.

“This girl has endless energy.” Colby laughed, holding her tight against him while he sat up, making room for the girls on the couch.

“I told you. Having a kid is a lot of work.” Y/n replied, taking a seat next to Colby.

“Mike is the one that ran around playing tag with her for over an hour”, he laughed. “I got the easy job. We took naps and watched movies.”

“Well I, for one, am exhausted.” Y/n said, reaching to grab Ivy. “Us two are going to head to bed.”

Colby shifted Ivy from his arms to Y/n’s. “If you guys need anything at all, come get me. I don’t even care if I’m asleep.”

“He’s a deep sleeper.” Tara laughed. “Make sure you bring something to hit him with if you need to wake him up.”

Colby nodded, “She’s not wrong.”

“I think we have everything we need”, Y/n laughed. She turned to Colby. “Thank you again for making this so easy. All of you guys have gone out of your way to make us feel welcome.”

“You ARE welcome, Y/n. Both of you.” He could see her getting choked up again. “I’m going to walk these two out while you two get settled in your room.”

“It was so nice meeting you guys.” Y/n said, waving to Tara and Jake as she made her way to her bedroom.

“Same. I’m looking forward to hanging out again.” Tara replied while Jake waved.

“I’ll see you guys tomorrow.” Colby said, walking them to the door so he could lock it after they left. Once the door was locked, Colby walked the apartment making sure everything was turned off or put away. He hesitated at the spare bedroom door before lightly knocking.

“Come in.” Y/n called, throwing her hair up in a messy bun as Colby opened the door.

“Hey, I just wanted to check in one more time.” He said, standing in the doorway.

She looked over at him. “I’m sorry I got emotional a minute ago.” y/n apologized, looking away from Colby. “I’m exhausted and the trip was stressful….” She rambled.

Colby walked towards y/n, interrupting her with a hand on her shoulder. “Y/n. While I have no doubt that road tripping with an almost 3-year-old is stressful…I know there’s something else bugging you”, he said, pulling her into a tight hug. “I don’t know if something happened or if maybe someONE made you feel like you don’t deserve to be treated well, but if you ever want to talk about it, I’m literally only a room away.”

Y/n nodded, her face hidden against Colby. “I’m just…I’m realizing a lot being around you guys for even just a short time.”

“I mean, we ARE kind of awesome.” Colby teased, trying to break the tension. He smiled hearing her laugh. “Get some sleep. You’ve got a few more people to meet tomorrow.”  

Colby woke up the next morning to loads of noise coming from his living room. When he turned over and checked his phone he realized why. It was almost 1pm. “Oh fuck.” He croaked out, slipping a clean hoodie on before noticing something on his bedside table. There was a piece of computer paper with a crayon drawing on it. A stick figure in blue and a heart in red.

He walked out to the living room with the drawing in his hand. “Good morning, sleepy head.” Mike teased him, “Did my baby sleep well?”

“I slept like a rock, sweet cheeks”, Colby replied, blowing Mike a kiss.

Mike moved to “catch” the kiss Colby blew him before turning and pretending to wipe it all over Sam’s face.

“Noooo. No!” Sam dramatically wiped his hands on his face.

Ivy was cracking up watching the whole exchange. “Iiiiivyyyy” Colby drew out her name, holding up the drawing he had found by his bed. “Is this mine?” he asked, squatting down next to where she was coloring at the coffee table.

She looked up at him, nodding yes. “Thank you, sweetheart. I’m going to hang it up over here.” He took the drawing and hung it on his fridge. “Why didn’t anyone wake me up?” Colby asked, turning back to the room.

“I was going to when Ivy went to put the drawing in your room, but she shushed me and pointed towards the door.” Jake laughed, “I wasn’t going to argue with her.”

Colby sat cross legged on the floor by the coffee table, pulling the little girl into his lap so she sat a little higher. “You can always wake me up, Ivy.” He told her, watching her draw.

“No get in trouble.” She mumbled, reaching for another crayon.

“I promise you’ll never get in trouble for waking me up.” He said, kissing the top of her head. “Where are the girls?”

“They’re picking up lunch. Kevin and some of the others are going to head over here soon, too.” Mike answered.

The next few days were a crazy hectic blur. Y/n and Mike had shared some of their half-written songs and lyric ideas with each other to get their creative juices flowing. Kat and Y/n filmed a “Singing on street corners” video and before they even posted their video, clips of them had practically gone viral. Each of the guys and a few of the girls all filmed group videos. Y/n was in most of them and Ivy was in a few too. And after an already long day, Colby still needed to film his video.

“uuuughh”, Colby groaned, staring blankly at the wall.

“You good?” Sam asked, his laptop out with research for their next series location on the screen.

“I have to film my video tonight and I have no idea what to film.” Colby replied.

“Film something that always bangs.” Sam said. “Let’s do a truth or strip.”

“Ahem.” Colby cleared his throat, pointing towards the little girl sleeping on the couch cushion next to him.

“Yeaaaaaah, let’s not.” Sam laughed. “Wait, do it the way Kat and I did! We put something on every time we didn’t want to answer a question.”

“Could do.” Colby said, thinking it over. “Just no swearing or sexual stuff.”

“Who would have thought Colby Brock would turn his channel PG.” Sam teased, going to set up the camera. “Go grab a bunch of hoodies and stuff. I’ll start writing down questions.”

“Aight, I’ll be back.” Colby replied. He stopped by the spare room to see if Y/n would ask the questions for the video.

“Of course.” y/n replied.

So far, the video was pretty funny. Even with keeping it fairly cleaner than Sam and Colby’s usual content. “Next question. Have either of you ever skinny dipped?” Y/n asked.

Sam and Colby looked at each other, Sam reaching out and grabbing another sweater.

“Brother, putting on another shirt is basically just saying yes.” Colby laughed, blushing a bit, “So yes. I have gone skinny dipping.”

“I think everyone should at least once.” Y/n added, saying “Next question” before either of the boys could say anything back. “Who are your YouTube crushes?”

“Katrina Stuart”, Sam smirked into the camera.

“Not fair.” Colby shoved Sam.

“I mean, Kat’s hot. I get it.” Y/n pointed out.

“Don’t I know it”, Sam made kissy faces at the camera.

“I’m keeping that whole thing in the video” Colby laughed. “Ignore me while I throw on ANOTHER friggen hoodie.”

“You cold?” they heard Ivy ask. She had woken up sometime during the last question. Colby finally popped his head through the hoodie and he made a face a her. She burst out in giggles.

“Are you laughing at me?” Colby asked, slowly creeping towards the little girl.

Sam stood up, taking the camera off the tripod. “I think she was.” He added.

“Nooooo” she squealed, backing up off of the couch.

“I think you were.” Colby said, wiggling his fingers towards her like he was going to tickle her.

She ran around the coffee table, uncontrollably laughing before trying to hide behind y/n’s legs.

“Oh no you don’t”, Colby crouched down on the other side of y/n, reaching around her legs and tickling Ivy.

“Hey, how did I get in the middle of this?” Y/n laughed.

“Moooom”, Ivy squealed between fits of laughter.

“Run Ivy!” Y/n pushed Colby off balance, so he fell back on his butt. The girl went to hide on the side of the couch.

“Not fair! I can barely move in all these hoodies!” Colby laughed laying on his back, pretending like he couldn’t get up. “Ivy, come help me!”

The girl peeked around the side of the couch. “I don’t know if I’d trust him.” Sam said, still filming the whole thing.

“I can’t get up!” Colby continued.

Ivy started slowly walking towards Colby, leaning over to see what he was doing. Colby laid there with his eyes closed not moving an inch. “Blue?” Ivy said, reaching down to poke him.

“Got you!” Colby half shouted, sitting up and pulling Ivy to his lap. He tickled her again, laughing quite a bit himself.

“You fibbed” she squealed out between laughs.

Colby chuckled and stopped tickling her. “I’m sorry”, he said, pulling her into a hug. He looked up at Sam and remembered they had been filming a video. “I think that’s all we’re going to get done for this one, guys” Colby laughed, addressing his audience. “Make sure to like and subscribe. Hit up all my social media pages. I’ll make sure to link Y/n and Sam down below so make sure you check them out too.” Colby looked down at Ivy. “Wave bye to the camera, Ivy”

“Byyyye” she waved, laughing when Colby tickled her again.

“Alright, guys. See you next week!” Colby waved to the camera.

“I am sweating to death” Sam said, starting to take the hoodies off.

“You think you’re sweating? I’ve got on twice as many, brother.” Colby whined, struggling to get them off of himself. “I’m going to shower and edit, so I probably won’t see you guys again tonight”, he said, looking up at Y/n.

“I have to be at Mike’s early tomorrow anyways” Y/n replied, looking at the time.

“You look nervous”, Colby chuckled, shedding the last of the hoodies.

“It’s always nerve-wracking working with someone new. I’m equal parts excited and nervous.” She explained.

“You’re going to do great.” Colby said, standing up and looking at her fondly. “Seriously. You write amazing music and your voice…come on. Your voice is killer.”

Y/n blushed. “Thank you. I think I needed that.” She said, turning to head to her bedroom. “Come on, Ivy!”

Ivy ran to Colby, reaching up for him to pick her up. “You have to get to bed, kiddo.” He said, picking her up.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him. “Night, blue.”

Colby couldn’t help the smile on his face. “Goodnight, sweetheart”, he replied, putting her down so she could head to her mom. He was up editing for a few hours and when he checked the living room, all of the lights were off. He made sure the front door was locked and headed to bed.

“Ivy, you need to eat your breakfast so we can start our day.” Y/n quietly told her daughter for the 3rd time. Ivy laid her head down on the coffee table with her hand to her other cheek. “Aww, baby. Your teeth?” Y/n realized why her daughter had woken up in a mood.

Ivy nodded as a few tears fell down her cheeks. Y/n grabbed her ice pack and picked ivy up, cradling her in her arms with the ice pack against her cheek.

Colby was up the second he heard Ivy crying. He shot out of bed and hurried into the living room in just his sweatpants ready to tackle whatever made that little girl cry. “What’s going on?” he said, looking around until he saw the two girls on the couch. “What happened?” he asked, kneeling down in front of them.

“Nothing happened. I’m sorry she woke you up.” Y/n apologized, “She’s got a few more baby teeth coming in.”

“Stop apologizing”, Colby said, his voice still thick with sleep. He grabbed Ivy’s hand “I’m sorry you’re hurting.” Looking up at Y/n he asked, “Is there any medicine we can give her to help?”

“Yeah, actually. It’s in my room.” She answered, going to stand up.

“Here.” Colby said, putting his arms out for Ivy to come to him. “Why don’t you go grab the medicine and I’ll take this one.”

Ivy clung on to Colby, tucking her face in his neck. “Oooo your cheek is cold”, Colby laughed. “Do you want the ice?” he asked her, feeling her shake her head no.

“Here you go, baby.” Y/n walked into the kitchen to grab a spoon. “This will help you.” Ivy lifted her head to take her medicine and quickly tucked her face back in Colby’s neck. “This stuff always makes her so sleepy.”

“You’ll feel better soon.” Colby said, lightly bouncing her in his arms.

“I’ll go grab her a comfy outfit so she can sleep in her car-seat.” Y/n said, turning to head to her room.

“Y/n, you can just leave her here”, Colby suggested, continuing to bounce the little girl in his arms.

“I’m going to be gone all day, though.” Y/n replied, putting her hand on Ivy’s back.

“So? We can go back to bed for a while, I’ll make sure she gets something to eat in a little bit, and you won’t be stressing about her on your first writing day with Mike.” Colby reassured her.

Y/n thought about it. “Maybe I can come home for lunch.” She said, “I’d feel bad if you had to watch her all day.”

“Y/n, I don’t HAVE to do anything. I’m volunteering. And if you install her car-seat in my car, I can bring her to visit you guys if she’s feeling better when she wakes up.” He offered.

Y/n took in the scene in front of her. Colby was standing there shirtless, gently bouncing her daughter, rubbing soothing circles into her back. His hair was a mess and his eyes were closed as he mumbled little ‘you’re okays’ to Ivy. *I could get used to this* she thought to herself, finally warming up to the fact that maybe some people really do care. Not everyone wants something from you.  “You’re a hard man to argue with.” Y/n smiled up at him.

“Then don’t argue with me.” Colby smirked.

Y/n reached up and pressed a kiss to Colby’s cheek. “I’m going to go get dressed”, she said, looking down at Ivy. “And this one is already half asleep so you two are good to go back to bed.”

“Does she have like a blanket she likes or a stuffed animal or something?” He asked, following Y/n.

“She’s never liked stuffed animals, actually.” Y/n answered. “Here’s her little security blanket.”

"I’ll grab that, we’re going to go nap, and you have a great day.” Colby said, sleepily wandering back to his room. He left his door open so Y/n could stop by if she wanted to before she left. “Let go, sweetheart.” Colby whispered to Ivy, laying her down on his bed and handing her her little blanket. He made sure she was on the side that was against the wall so that she didn’t roll off. “Your mom said you didn’t like stuffed animals, but this guy here is special.” He said, grabbing his stuffed koala.

Ivy sniffled, little remnants of her crying finally fading. “Thank you”

“Get some sleep.” He said, crawling into bed “You’ll feel better soon.”

When Y/n finished getting ready about an hour later, she quietly tiptoed into Colby’s room. She immediately grabbed her phone, taking a picture of the precious sight before her. Colby was on his side and Ivy was the cutest little spoon you’ve ever seen. In her arms was the stuffed Koala and Colby’s arm was draped over both of them, snoring.

Over the next week or so, it became a habit that when Y/n would wake up early to go write with Mike, Ivy would just crawl into bed with Colby. He would wake up hours later to tiny cuddles. They’d get dressed, go sit at some restaurant for lunch, and then bring food to Mike and Y/n. In fact, Colby’s video this week was just vlog footage of him and Ivy. They had gone to the zoo, gotten ice cream or food a dozen times, and gone to the park to swing. Today, Brennen brought Kobe over to the apartment so Colby and him could film a video for Brennen’s channel.

“I never thought I’d think something was cuter than my dog, but damn.” Brennen laughed, watching Ivy and Kobe play fetch.

Colby laughed, reminding Ivy not to throw the toy in the kitchen. He didn’t want her to get hurt on the corners of the counter. “She’s something”, he said, hearing Ivy call out an “I’m sorry.”

“You’re okay, sweetheart. I just don’t want you to get hurt.” Colby smiled.

“You’re in full dad mode, bro.” Brennen said, smirking over at one of his best friends.

Colby looked at him with his eyebrows furrowed together. “Am not.”

“My dude, it’s obvious you care about her. And you haven’t shut up about Y/n.” Brennen laughed, hitting Colby’s chest with the back of his hand. “You haven’t come out partying once since they got here.”

“First, y/n obviously doesn’t like me like that. She’s been here for 2 weeks and absolutely nothing has happened. No real flirting, no nothing. So, I can pine all I want, but I’m going to have to accept it when they leave.” Colby said, trying not to sound sad about that fact.

“I disagree”, Brennen tried to sneak in, but Colby continued talking, giving him a look.

“And second, I do care about Ivy.” Colby said, hearing her break out in a fit of laughter as Kobe licked her face. “I have this feeling that her dad was a dirtbag.”

“Yeah?” Brennen asked.

“Y/n would fight back tears the whole first week she was here whenever we were nice to her. Like, just our normal friends group level of nice.” Colby said, thinking back on how Y/n had reacted. “And Ivy apologized for everything. She accidentally spilled water on the coffee table and kept asking me if I was sure she wasn’t in trouble. Like, who the fuck would get mad over spilling water? Especially at their own daughter?”

“Have you talked to Y/n about it?” Bren asked.

“No. I kind of let her know I knew something was going on. That I was here. That she could talk to me whenever she was ready, I just…They don’t deserve that, dude. They deserve all the love in the world.” Colby continued watching Ivy and Kobe play.

“I gotta head out, but I’m going to say something to you first.” Brennen said, waiting for Colby to look at him. “I know you’re young. I know. #Brolby. We’re wild boys that like to have fun and do stupid shit so I know I’m not who you expected this to come from…but you’ve got a lot of love to give, brother. My dad didn’t give two shits about what happened to my siblings or my mom. It’s fucking obvious you care. A LOT. So don’t NOT take your chance because your palms get sweaty around your crush. There’s a lot more riding on this than whether or not a girl rejects you. No one’s going to love that little girl as much as you already do.”

Brennen stood up, putting his phone in his pocket and grabbing his camera. “Preciosa mío, come say bye to uncle Brennen.” He called out, picking Ivy up when she ran to him. “I promise I’ll bring Kobe back to play soon.” He kissed her on the cheek and put her down.

“Hey Ivy, if you go put on your jacket, we can go see mommy and Mike.” Colby stood up, following Brennen to the door.

Ivy ran to her room squealing about getting to play with more dogs.

“Brennen.” Colby said, pulling him into their usual bro hug when he turned around. When Brennen went to pull away, Colby held him tight for a second. “Thanks, man.”

Brennen clapped him on the back, “Anytime, brother.”

part 3...

[szopenhauer]

What star sign is the last person you text messaged? Aries

How did you feel when you woke up today? not well

Do you know what the person you're dating is doing at this moment? napping

Who was the last person to make you cry with laughter? my gf

Who was the last person you talked about sex/love with? either her or my father

Who introduced you to the person you're in a relationshop with? my high school classmate K.K.

How many brothers does your father have? two

When was the last time you did something which you knew was wrong? I don’t know what’s wrong and what not, ugh...

Do you still speak to your first crush? nope

If you could get your own house with one friend, who would you pick? dad but I’d prefer to live alone

Which is worse, too-tight clothes or much too-loose clothes? too tight are worse

What is something that you are willing to fight for? hmm...

If you jump, can you touch the ceiling of the room you’re in? noooo

Which do you think is worse: ear aches or tooth aches? tooth aches

How many different colors are you wearing right now?  3 (4 counting panties)

You can only listen to one band for the rest of your life, who do you pick? omg I can’t choose :o

Do you like big or small cars better? big

What store do you get the majority of your shoes from? *shrug*

What place, in your mind, is heaven on earth? How about hell on earth? there’s no such thing as heaven on Earth to me as I would bring myself there and ruin everything but almost whole planet is hell mostly because of people

Do you think there is anything scary about midnight? midnight is the time of ghosts but no longer minute before and/or after :P 

Can you snap with both of your hands? yep

In your opinion what is the absolute worst house chore? laundry?

How young do you think is too young to get married? definitely under 20 but I think it’s best to get married 30+

Who do you think is the dumbest superhero?  I can’t believe Green lantern is an actual superhero...

Would you rather be a hair stylist or a clothes designer? clothes designer

Would you rather be 3 inches taller or shorter than you are now? taller

Are there any foods that you think smell good, but taste bad? possibly

Would you ever stay overnight at any of your neighbors houses? why would I? 

Do you think it would be cooler to play a hero or the villain in a movie? hero

If you had the last name of your favorite actor, what would your name be? I like many actors so...

how many syllables does your first name consist of?: 3

do you know someone who is allergic to chocolate?: used to know

have you worn a dress [casual, formal, etc] within the past week?: not within the past week

when was the last time you saw the last person you kissed?: days ago

is that person your significant other?: yup

last person you talked to on the phone and what was it about?: mom, I informed her she probably didn’t take out the matches from my pocket and now she’s washing my shorts with ‘em inside the machine and my instinct was right so she turned it off in the last moment, minutes or even seconds later water would soak the package and that could ruin the clothes, I wish she checked or asked while taking my stuff away

got any plans today?: been to laboratory, done shopping but am too tired to help my parents in carrying wood 

were you born in an odd or even numbered year?: even

did you drive anywhere at all today?: took the bus

which of your parents did you see last?: both at once

describe your current shirt: black tee Nie każdy musi mnie lubić w końcu nie każdy ma dobry gust with Lil My

are you currently listening to music?: I’m very picky about songs today

do you fill out your own surveys or do you think it’s just weird?: I do

where did you buy the shoes you last wore?: Biedronka (Tom & Rose)

last disappointment?: health issues 

do you still talk to the person you first kissed?: yeah

did you seriously believe that the opposite sex had cooties in elementary?: I didn’t think about that 

did you take a nap today?: I barely ever take naps in general

name something random in your car: I don’t own a car

would/did you cheat on someone for revenge or if they wouldn’t find out? neither

would you rather be remembered for something bad or forgotten? forgotten

would you date someone twice your age for money? only if I really had to survive and there was no other way but not forever?

rate your self-confidence, 1 being insecure, and 10 being cocky. I’m insecure but not sure how much 

are you content? I wish

would you knowingly be who someone cheats on someone else with? cheats with me on someone they pretend to love? hell no

would you sleep with a teacher to pass a class you were failing? ewww, yuk

have you ever contemplated physically hurting yourself or another? mhm

are you prejudice against any groups of people? I am

is there anything you chose to be ignorant about? (war, animal rights, etc) maybe

would you replace any family members if possible (& who)? oh well...

do you lie when asked how you’re doing? what for? to blame then for not noticing? to be an ass who’s lying?...

do you have any plans for tomorrow? meeting with M.

are you able to get a tan? not much

the next time you are on an airplane, where will you be traveling to? umm... no thx

are you satisfied with the picture on your id card? could be worse but also could be better

what are your chances of getting with your crush? I'm taken

what color is your car? no car!

is the song you’re currently listening to being sung by a male or female? two women

where did you get the shirt that you’re wearing? it was a gift

how tall is the last person you kissed? taller than me

is anybody in the room with you right now? not rn

how long have you been with your significant other, if you have one? 3 months

do you enjoy dried fruit? meh

How’s your day going? blergh

What does your umbrella look like? I borrow my parents’ umbrella, I hate umbrellas

Do you share a room with anyone? there are furniture with stuff inside that don’t belong to me

Do you have socks on? Describe them. grey

Are you one of those people who has like a hundred apps on their phone? I have spotify, choices, tumblr, tik tok, fb and messenger

Do you have good reflexes? I guess

Picture you think is cute.

Do you like blowing bubbles? sometimes

Are you better at posing good questions or coming up with outrageous dares? depends

Has there been a celebrity death that really affected you? I cried after some celebs but that’s all

If you’re out of high school, have you stayed in touch with your high school friends?  I haven’t :(

Do you think, if it came down to it, that you’d be able to kill someone? I believe I might

Are you good at rating things? am not

Do you get into a lot of arguments? :x

Can you pass for older than you are? can’t even pass for my real age lmfao

Do you talk a lot? at times

Are you capable of finishing a game of Monopoly? it’s not that hard

Do you own any tie-dye clothing? I hate tie-dye 

How much soda do you drink in a week? - Do you like being asked questions? love Are you nosy? slightly

How well can you pay attention to someone talking? depends What is the closest yellow thing to you? rosary Would you mind living on a farm? I’d try Are you a patient person? wouldn’t say so What annoys you the most about people? what doesn’t... Does your computer freeze a lot? my browser freezes right after turning on the computer and my internet dies often

Have you ever ate glue? wtf

When is the last time you took a picture? this day

If you could know one thing about the future, what would it be? when will I die for example

Do you like Ellen Degeneres? she’s awful

Are you comfortable dancing in public? whatever

Would you like to live to be 110 years old? I wanna die already

Do you like getting your picture taken? I’m ugly

Do you like being the X or the O when you play tic tac toe? X

What do you think is the most popular name for a girl? I checked:

Zofia Hanna Julia Zuzanna Alicja Maja Helena Maria Oliwia Pola

What about a boy?

Jan Franciszek Antoni Aleksander Stanisław Jakub Adam Leon Mikołaj Szymon

*do ya like any?

How many people are around you right now? my family’s in the kitchen eating so I’m alone

Do spicy foods give you heartburn or make you make you gassy? both and more

Is body hair attractive or unattractive to you? it’s normal/natural?

Do you prefer bare feet or socks? socks

Hard wood floor or carpet? hardwood

Would you ever want to work in a toy store? yasss

Do you like asking questions better or answering? answering

Do you follow your head or heart more? head

Would you rather give up your hand or your foot? foot

Have you ever tried crowd surfing? too risky and no fun

If you could have 16 wishes, tell me just one you wish: I don’t need 16, 3 are enough

Do you like the movie Bambi? If so, who is your favorite on there? I don’t remember Bambi 

Would you rather be on the computer all day or watch TV? computer

Would you rather be a police man or a firefighter? police

Do you like jokes or riddles better? jokes

Do you like onion rings? disgusting

Do you like odd or even numbers better? even are easier to count

Last song you heard? Marroon 5 - Animals

Ocean or lake? lake

Do you know a lot of people with the middle name Marie? weird but no, Anna is more popular

Do you like loud or quiet people better? smth in between unless in public - quiet strangers are better

Taking pictures or getting your picture taken? taking

Do you like chocolate? meh

Favorite day of the year? New year’s eve?

Favorite holiday? same

Crayons or markers? markers

Snookie or Vinny? Snookie

have you ever been to an animal shelter? that would break my heart

are you tired right now?

who is the worst actor or actress in your opinion? there are plenty  have you ever bought someone else lingerie? nope where are your parents right now? run around the house like crazy if you have a dog, does it bark a lot? luckily not, he howls rarely too have you ever seen a magic show? sure can you juggle? I tried to learn but failed

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #241

“where once a heart was beating, nothing but embers glow. our love, it serves as kindling to stoke this flame’s inferno.”

Would you care if your partner did drugs etc? If it was legal here and just for medical purposes, I'd be fine with just weed. Otherwise, I treat the idea the same way as I would a tobacco smoker: no. Has anyone lost their virginity to you? I guess in a gay context? For two females, when is it really... "lost?" Idk. Do you live near a beach? Like... two hours away. Have you ever skipped school just because you were tired? Ha ha, yeah... Do you enjoy going through the car wash? I do, actually. I'm still a little kid when it comes to the rainbow soap, ha ha. Have you done anything embarrassing lately? Oh, I'm sure. How many bracelets do you have on your wrists right now? One. Would you consider painting your bedroom purple? Noooo, it wouldn't be cute y'all. Do you actually wear every shirt in your drawer? Ha, no... mainly because there's a handful of them that I'm working to shrink back into. Then there's others I'm self-conscious of because of color and having hyperhidrosis out the ass. Just wearing black disguises sweat the best. Would you ever get a tattoo on your collar bone? I have one already, but I'm getting it covered at some point. I didn't put much thought into it and has no meaning to me now. I plan on getting the other collarbone tatted too, of course. Are you pregnant right now? Bitch fuck no. Do you still dress up for Halloween? Ugh, no, but only because I can't afford even things to put together my own costume. Not having anywhere to go only further discourages dressing up period. Who was the last male you talked to? My dad. Do you hate cuddling? Hell no, if I like you anyway. Do you have any bruises right now? No. Why did you take the last pill you took? They're my morning prescription meds. My last pill was for anxiety. Could you handle having kids? FUCK no. Nervous breakdowns would happen twice a week, I promise. What outfit makes you feel the most attractive? Attractive? In anything? What a concept. What do you think of people who always wear make-up? You do you, boo. What’s a smell that absolutely makes you gag? Gag, probably vomit. Or feces of some animals. Is there a smell that gives you headaches? GASOLINE. And fresh-cut grass. What do you do while you’re on campus but not in class? Sit in the library doing schoolwork or whatever on my laptop. Do you know anyone who has Autism/Asperger’s syndrome? Yes. Has anyone of the same sex ever hit on you? Yeah. Are you open to a same-sex relationship and why or why not? Yeah; been in one already and I'm still open to dating another girl. What do you think of people who litter and do you? I openly fucking despise you. So obviously not. How much time do you spend online daily? If I'm not in school, I can like... guarantee you I'm on the computer doing at least something. Not always the same site, but I'm somewhere. I absolutely hate how reliant I am on the Internet. Do you wear sunglasses regularly? I never do. I need prescription sunglasses. Who was the last person you called? My mom. Do you own a tablet of any kind? No. Do you tend to put things off until the last minute? OH YES INDEED. What are your parents’ natural hair colors? What is yours? Mom's is brown, and I cannot believe Dad was born with blond hair. HOW does that turn black. I was born dirty blonde. Are you afraid of getting shots? Nah, just the injection is kinda painful with how it burns. Do you hate it when people smoke around you? I very much so hate it. Have you ever wanted to vlog? Noooo, I'm too awkward for that. Always have been. What’s the last piercing you got? Tongue. Do you have a best friend? Ye. What’s your internet homepage? Google. Do you have a shower stall or a bath tub? A tub. When was the last time you saw someone attractive? In person? Idk. What do you hear right now? "I Am Hell" by Machine Head. This time last year, can you remember who you liked? Same person I like now. Did you speak with your father today? No. Are you currently frustrated with someone? No. Name one of your hobbies? Watch YouTube is high up there and like... the only thing I have motivation to do lately. I really hate it. I want my writing will to come back. What is your biggest worry in life right now? My lack of a job. Do you like hot or cold showers? Hot. Are you happy with your relationship status? I don't have a particular feeling about it. What colors would you like to have at your wedding? Depends on the season and the opinion of my spouse, too. How easy was it to get over the person you last dated? It didn't take too long, though it was really because the event left me believing we were, without question, getting back together once we are independent enough to live on our own/mutually move out. It's still possible we may, should life just play out where it works out, but it also was much easier to accept because we're still completely best friends. Have you ever lived with a girlfriend/boyfriend? Not on paper, but pretty much. How old were you when you first smoked weed? But I never have. What is one thing that you’ve done that a lot of people said you couldn’t? Idk; I don't have a lot of unsupportive people in my life. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? Mom. What was the last reason you cried? I listened to a song that deeply triggered my PTSD. Have you ever hated a song, and then later on found that you liked it? Yup, however that works. Did you have a good childhood? It was mostly normal, I guess? Do you play games on your PC? Just World of Warcraft right now. I started Alien: Isolation and Resident Evil 6 FOREVER ago, I just haven't had the motivation to finish either. Do you have a formspring? It's familiar, but I'm actually not sure what that even is. Do you know anyone that is racist? Welcome to the South. Do you have an active sex life? No. Are you defensive about anything? Yes. Have you ever driven 80+ mph? No. Have you ever changed a lightbulb? Yes. Have you ever gotten a bullseye in darts/archery? Darts, possibly. Never done archery. Do you have a Wii? Yeah. Do you own any animals that absolutely hate you? No. What brand is the computer you’re currently on? Acer. Are there any piercings you want but you’re too afraid it will hurt? The pain factor doesn't keep me away from piercings, so no. Do you think ear gauging is gross? When it gets to a certain width, to me anyway, it's pretty ew. I don't judge at all about someone having them, but it can get to a point where it just isn't appealing imo. Are you afraid of anyone in your family? Who and why? No. What’s the last scary movie you saw? Ummmm idk. It's been a long-ass time. I'm sure something in theaters, but I really don't know. Why aren’t you friends with your last ex? We are friends. When did you last spend the night at a friend’s house? A year ago when I was at Sara's. Did you ever watch 2Girls1Cup? Fuck no, I've never even looked into what exactly it is, but I know enough to know I don't wanna fucking see it. Do you have anxiety or depression? *shrugs* Why not both? Have you ever lived in a mobile home? No. Have you ever had your bedroom in a basement? Never even had a basement to begin with lol. Friend asks you to hide drugs, booze etc for them, do you do it? lol no. Animal you like to watch but sort of creeps you out: Big spiders. I particularly like writing spiders/orb weavers though, and watching big spiders eat is just fascinating. Have you entered the Lays create a flavor contest? Oh man how long ago was that??? No. Bagels or English muffins? Bagels gotta win it for me. Who is a family member you look forward to seeing on a holiday? On Christmas especially, I love seeing my niece and nephew because they're just so excited. Brings me back to what it felt like as a little kid. Are Easter baskets only for kids? No. My sisters and I each had super cute baskets that Mom would fill until like... two years ago. Now that it's just me living with her, she'll just usually buy me a candy bar or something. Do you do anything to recognize St Patrick’s Day? No. Do you think nutcracker figurines are creepy or cool? No opinion. Speaking of nuts, do you like them? For the most part, no. There are instances however where I can enjoy like little pieces of them with other kinds of food, ex. chocolate. What do you do when you are nervous? Dead giveaway: I'm kneading/playing with my hands. I pace naturally, but I do so more frequently when I am nervous. I'll have a harder time making eye contact, too. Does your family have an SUV or pick up truck? No. Which of your parents do you laugh more with? Dad. Have you ever been to an open casket wake or funeral? Wake, yes. Who mows the lawn at your house? Some guy Mom knows through the dance studio. Where do you keep your phone at night? Usually to the right of my pillow, a bit far away, and up more towards the headboard. My bed's a queen-size and it's just me, so I have room where I won't hit it. If it has to charge though, then it's on the table beside my bed. Do you feel comfortable asking your parents or grandparents for money? No in almost every case. I'm only somewhat comfortable if it's Mom and I'm asking for like a snack from the gas station or something like that. What’s the last thing you lost? My phone, I think. If you could have your own car or an apartment, which would you choose? An apartment would be entirely useless as I am in no way competent enough to live alone yet, and a car wouldn't have much use seeing as I only have my permit and STILL pretty much never drive. It'd be more useful than an apartment, though. Last time you hid, and why: Uhhhhh. I have zero clue. How do you like your eggs? I'll only ever take them scrambled with cheese. Favorite Mexican food? Quesadillas. Upcoming event you are dreading? I'm happily enjoying it right now, but in another way, I'm dreading school break ending just because I am INCREDIBLY nervous about the effects of it on my legs with the whole muscle atrophy thing. I'm scared of regressing. Do you have a favorite pen? What kind? No. Do you do more surveys during the day or night? The day. Just shampoo, or shampoo + conditioner? Just shampoo. Conditioner adds oil to your hair, and trust me, my hair does NOT need any extra oil. Scariest driver you’ve ridden with: Dad the day he had to pick Nicole and me up from school and we had a 30-minute drive home. Basically, we got home in maybe 15 or less. He was in a fucking awful mood, speeding like hell, running red lights, passing illegally... I was entirely convinced we were going to die that day. Still one of the scariest of my life. Do you think you’re smarter than the average person? If so, why? It depends on the subject matter; in areas such as English, wisdom, stuff kinda like that, honestly yeah. In areas like common damn sense and mathematics, fuck no. What was the last topic you did thorough research on? Why? Paganism. I recently found that Neo-Paganism is the closest description for my spiritual beliefs; it covers such a broad spectrum, and it emphasizes the divinity of nature, free will (so long you are not inflicting harm upon another), the equality of man and woman (plus the beauty of humanity), and one of the concepts of the "ultimate being" includes not an actual deity, but just like this... source of energy and power. I don't even know if I believe it to be conscious, it's just like... the source, and it lies within nature. I'm still doing more and more research into it as I'm thoroughly intrigued, and I continue to feel more at home with its inclusiveness to an array of interpretations. What was the last thing to upset you? So beyond just an annoyance? Probably when this random fucking Facebook post of a father sharing just how proud he was of his son for killing wolves together and sharing purely evil photographs of them playing with/posing the bloody dead bodies (which included making them "snarl" at the camera, and mind you, their mouths were full of blood) popped up on my feed for no goddamn reason. Safe to say, I left a comment and got into a fight with a backwards son of a fuck who thought it was totally kosher to kill these "vermin" and used personal attacks versus logic to try in vain to prove his point, when all he did was accomplish me seeing him as the vermin. Where did you go to the last time you left your house? My sister's house. Do you wear something on your left hand/wrist/arm without fail? Friendship ring with Sara as well as the bracelet she gave me. What is an article of clothing you would never ever wear? Stealing the last answer of jumpsuits. Will you go outside today? Probably not. Are you doing everything you can to make yourself happy? Not everything. I know I could do more. What is a phrase or a saying you try to live by? I don't think I have a set one that I always look to. I refer more to ideas, such as to be unrelenting in your goals. What is something you lie to yourself about? I don't know. I'm not good at that. What has been the best job you’ve ever had? lol What is a holiday, that is NOT celebrated in your country, that you would like to celebrate? Day of the Dead. I know some do celebrate it here, but it's more of a holiday in Mexico. Which nation’s culture (excl. your own) do you find the most interesting? Germany's, from what I remember. We learned quite a bit about them while I took it as a language. They are very serious about honesty and manners. What is something you judge about other people? How you treat others, certain aspects of ones personality (ex., arrogance), and as the previous person stated, to a certain degree anyway, moral/political/religious beliefs. What is something you do not want to discuss? I get really uncomfortable talking about sex, and though no one in my "real" life knows about it (except perhaps Mom due to an outburst during the breakup), I don't like even looking back on the Joel situation. There are also some political things I just don't want to talk about. Do you enjoy solving problems? No, shit's stressful. Are you a kinesthetic, an auditory or a visual learner? Kinesthetic, 100%. Are you an introvert, an extrovert or an ambivert? I'm a pretty strong introvert, though not as much as I once was. I can get lonely kinda quickly now, but I still NEED my alone time. Are you socially anxious or awkward? OH BOY AM I!!!!!!! Do you actually think it’s gross to talk about body functions? NO!!!!!!! This needs needs needs to be normalized because it's stuff we all endure, so we should be comfortable talking about these things, asking questions, etc. Have you ever sent a love letter? Yeah. When you look up at the sky do you ever NOT see a plane or vapor trail? Yeah. Welcome to the country. Do you wear any shoes with holes because you can’t give them up? No. When you go out to breakfast, what do you order? Pretty much always pancakes, scrambled eggs, and bacon. What’s the best compliment you’ve gotten from a boss/teacher? That when she came back to teaching, I was the exact kind of student she hoped for. What’s a weird or interesting nickname you gave someone? lmao the first one that came to mind was Connie's "Einnoc." Is there a phrase or mantra you repeat when you are frightened? No. What are you most envious of? Successful photographers lmao. Do you have a friend with a habit that worries you? Yes. Would you rather have coffee, cocoa, tea, or soda? UGH soda. That's my weaknesses. You could take sweets from me, but I'm pretty reliant on soft drinks. When you walk into your best friend’s room, what do you smell? I don't remember, actually... I haven't been there enough. Have you ever purposely broken something that belonged to a sibling? Wow, no. Have you ever worked at the same place as your best friend? No. Do you like to visit famous people’s homes? I've never done that, and I find it disrespectful anyway. Give celebs their privacy, goddamn. Do you take days off from shaving when you can get away with it? The only thing I shave are my armpits, and considering I don't shower everyday, yes. Every time I do take one however, I always shave. Is there anything hanging on your bathroom walls? No. If your SO agreed, would you want an open relationship? No. Have you ever slept with three people in the same bed? When? Why? At some point, yeah, but not in a romantic context. It was with friends or family when we had limited space. Does your family regularly eat sit down meals together? Pretty much never. Who would you like to slow dance with? To what song? SOBS "The Only Exception" by Paramore w/ Sara continues to sob What’s your favorite pet name someone calls you? None that I have now. If you could talk to one species of animal what would it be? Good question. I guess cats, as I have one and would love to know what he thinks. What’s the largest animal you’ve ever seen in person? An elephant, strolling RIGHT by the fence at the zoo. Have you ever used the change counting machine at a store or mall? Ohhh, I remember those! Yes. Would you give mouth to mouth to your dog to save its life? We have a dog I honestly can't stand, and this is gonna get me mentally punched, but I don't know. NO, not BECAUSE I don't like him, but I don't love him enough to deal with those germs. I don't think I could stomach doing it. If you came with a warning label, what would it say? "Is going to be uncomfortable if you say one word to her but craves friendship anyway." Have you ever tried to learn a language on your own? No. Have you ever had a pet destroy something valuable or important? The thing that upset me the most was when Teddy tore up the corner of one of my art pieces I'm most proud of. I cried. It was weird considering he never really tore up stuff... but alright then. What’s the best burger EVER? UGH I'm weak for Wendy's Baconators. Did you ever show up late for an important event? Probably at some point?

[romantic-witch]

All You Had To Do Was Stay // David [Pt. 2]

imagine: david confessing about everything

please please read the first chapter first, it's right: here

inspired: you are in love (taylor swift)

warning: english is not my first language. please correct me if I have any grammar mistakes.

Zane, thanks to god, was really understanding of me editing the video by myself. I finished his last vlog and while uploading, he texted me, saying:

"I just filmed a quick bonus video, it's a brand deal don't worry. I'm gonna drive to San Diego to shoot some stuff so I'll drop off the memory card."

Zane making my life easier once again. I had no intention of going back to LA. At least maybe for a thousand years. I can’t, after that night. David tried to call me four times but I ignored two of them and missed the other two.

At least my beliefs didn't change. God sent me another so called "clue" and it failed so back to being an atheist, I guess.

The whole week passed really quicker than I thought. I went to some classes, learned I got an A from my multimedia storytelling class, and ditched some classes, for example that boring ass class named principles of public relations. Of course it's my worst class since I'm not a social butterfly.

I was out, doing some paper work for one of my classes when a text from Zane appeared on my phone.

"Babyy, we decided to shoot in Santa Barbara, so can you pick up the memo card from Scott?"

I responded:

"What was he doing with your memo card lmao?"

"He ran out of storage in his card."

"He says hi btw."

I sent a waving hand emoji and then texted:

"I'll call Scott when I arrive in his place."

He sent an okay emoji.

I handed my work from Google Classroom and started packing my stuff. It was 3.34 pm. It was exactly the time I would start my hour and a half road trip to LA, like every other Friday. I head back to my dorm, dropped off my textbooks and laptop, and with that I began my road trip to the one place I said I wouldn’t go for the rest of my life, with my Subaru SUV.

When it’s the decision of the boss, who literally pays for my student loans, I had to do it.

-

LA traffic is the worst. We literally had zero traffic back in the island. Guam, with over 100k citizens still managed to be the most amazing thing that ever happened to USA while people are praising the City of Angels with it's unbearable traffic and horrible pizza.

I was jamming to some '80s music and then my car, since it's connected to my phone, alarmed me saying:

"You got a new message from..."

The car lady waited a split second and then added:

"David. Do you want me to read it?"

I responded no and got my phone just to see the notification.

"Hey! Heard you were coming to LA? Can we talk?"

I literally threw my phone back to its place, the shotgun seat, and focused more to the road and Madonna.

Maybe if I stop talking to him, he'll think I'm just a piece of ass and stop liking me.

That was my mind set for this past week. Yes, I ignored some of my friends when we got into an argument, but maybe for 10 minutes. I have been ignoring David for the past week, and if he did the same thing to me, I would be pretty pissed. 

He loves Liza. I am just trying to help him see the truth, or the bigger picture. Every single person believes they are going to get married, have 3 kids and two dogs in a huge ass mansion by the time they are 30. Okay, maybe not that early, but still.

The traffic finally gotten better and I started to drive a little bit faster. At least I was not in the highway anymore. Highways give me anxiety and that is no good considering I will have another one just about 25 minutes, when I arrive at the house. But my car, most certainly, was not feeling too great. Some noises started to came from the back which I specifically turned off the radio to hear it.

I pulled over and saw a little hole in my tire, which let the air come out of it. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck! Why do all of these things happen to me in very specific times? I called someone that could help and waited for them in a nearby cafe for almost an hour.

Scott, Matt and David texted me, saying: in order,

"Hey, I'm going out to see a film with Kristen, text me when you come."

"Heard you were coming to LA, wanna binge the new Titans on Netflix and talk how bad it is?"

"Are you okay?"

"Are you okay?"

The message was continued with two other messages saying:

"You were suppose to come 30 minutes ago."

"I mean you are not suppose to, you usually come around that time."

I wanted to say something. At least tell him that my car broke. But I know for a fact that he will come up here and pick me up. So I texted Scotty.

"Hey, my car broke in Moorpark Street, I'll probably be around when you guys finish the movie. Just wanted to let you know."

"Oh god, are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. No worries."

"Our film is about to start, should I sent anybody?"

"Noooo, but thank you anyways."

"Okay, I'll get to you after the film."

After about an hour and three minutes, the employee came and started to look at my tire. She explained that she needed to take it back to the repair shop since it looked like something looks like it stuck between my tire and my car.

She jokingly added:

"Hope, it's not a squirrel or anything!" and started laughing.

I just wished it wasn't and nervously smiled.

My car was starting to get it's place in the truck the lady came with and all I did was to stare at it and think of all the money this was going to take, I didn't realise I was silently crying until the truck started moving and I saw my car in the back of it.

The lady offered me a ride but her place was so off where I was heading, I politely refused.

I started to walk, the house was about 30 minutes away from where I was at. A quick nice walk, Pearl. That's good for your body.

I was walking for almost 5 minutes when a car honk behind me, gave me the chills.

It was the white Tesla.

David looked at me from the open window and said:

"Hop on!"

At this point all I wanted was to edit Zane's video so I did get into his car.

"Hi"

"Hey, Scott texted me but I had to look through the whole Avenue to find you."

"You didn't have to David."

"It's fine, it's fine."

We drove back to the house and didn't have a word.

I can feel his little glances from time to time, but I tried so hard not to look at him. Even once. The city lights were catching my eye, not him.

How can silence be this loud?

It was getting dark and after 20 minutes of driving, we finally came.

David stopped the car, which led the Tesla to open the car lights inside.

David immediately turn the lights off and started to stare at me. And I couldn't help myself but look deeply at him as well.

I got out of the car.

I felt a little tear in my right eyeball falling down, I immediately wiped it off with my hand.

I knocked the door. This was something nobody did in this house. I heard come in from, I'm assuming Jason, and went in.

I pull out my phone and texted Scott that I made it home and then asked Jason where the memo card is.

He said: "You should check the kitchen, it's where Scott edits the most."

I head to the kitchen and Scott's computer, with the memo card plugged in, was on the counter.

Me, being the bad bitch I am, pulled the memo card out of the computer which led to his computer warning me with the notification. 

David was nowhere to be seen. This was my time to escape LA and go back to Long Beach. I’ll catch a bus provided by my lovely school. The MTA Express bus station is not far away. 

The second I opened the house’s main door, Jason from the other side of the room, said:

“Are you leaving?”

“Yeah, gotta edit some stuff.”

“Well, David said he is waiting for you in Todd’s room.”

“Why can’t he, tell that to my face?”

Jason sighed and continued:

“Look Pearl, David might look like a 22 year old adult but he is a literal child. But you are an adult. I know what you are trying to do and I totally understand. But my only advise would be talk to him. Tell your feeling to him, whether it is positive or not.”

These were the only wise words I have heard from Jason. And he looked very sincere. 

“Okay.” I said and walked to Todd’s room.

Jason shouted from the living room:

“You are doing the right thing!”

Todd’s room door was closed. Before heading in, I took a deep breath and leaned my forehead beside the door. 

I opened the door. 

I actually never been in Todd’s room, for obvious reasons. First being, I am just an editor and that was the only reason actually.

A “Hi” came from David but it was quite like mice.

“Hi.” I said.

He was sitting on the bed. I don’t want to be near him so I just stood next to the door.

“So what you wanna talk about?” I said.

I knew what was about to happen but I asked him anyway.

“You know what I wanna talk about.”

“Enlighten me then.” I said jokingly, while sitting in front of David on the bed. 

With his classic laugh, David fell to his back and hit the head of the bed.

I giggled and asked if he was okay.

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine.” 

We stared at each other for awhile.   

“I gotta go David, what were you gonna tell me?” I said.

I loved breaking the mood. David’s face went down.

“You don’t think I like you.”

“I don’t think about it, I know it for a fact.”

“How can you know something this personal about me? Think about that then!”

“David, I am just trying for you to see the bigger picture. I see how you look at Liza every single day. I see how you talk about her, those things are not the things you say about a friend.”

“Because she is not my friend.”

“Exactl-”

“She is one of my best friends. We shared a lot of great memories together but the conclusion not only Liza came, but me as well, we are better off as friends.” David bursted.

“I just can’t think of a single reasonable solution why aren’t we together.” he continued.

“I like you and you like me, but you are sitting here stuck in my past relationship more than I am. It might not show it that well but I really really like you Pearl. And I can’t think of-”

I kissed him. I, Pearl Manglona, kissed my dream boy. Well, he kissed me back as well. That was the big shocker.

The kiss became a little steamy when he let me sit on his lap.

And a little more steamy when he pulled his shirt off.

Which let me take off mine as well.

We kissed for maybe a solid forty seconds, after he started kissing my neck. 

He made some solid points about me while he literally confronted me just 5 minutes ago, but he did not knew about my sweet spot. 

I immediately started to giggle, which let me laughing.

David’s face lighten up and said: “I did not taught you were ticklish.” 

“Well I didn’t think I would be confronted by a 22 year old with the mental age of 8.”

“I really like you, wow.”

I went for another kiss.

-

Well thank you for reading!

Also very sorry that I couldn’t upload it sooner. Believe me, I was creatively exhausted.

lots and lots of love <3

zayn :)

[dansphlevels]

Prompt idea where Phil surprises Dan with a bath because he’s been so stressed lately with YouTube and he didn’t think Phil cared and so they make out in the tub i’m a slut for this shit lmao

Tub Time

Option number 4! (Short fluffy slightly romantic/slightly sexual)

Summary: Gamingmas is a bit too much for Dan to handle and Phil decides the best way to help him is to drag him into a shared bath. Play fighting, banter, and all that mushy gushy kiss kissing ensues.

Length: 2k words

“I’m sorry, Phil, let’s just get pizza or something. I have to edit.”

Phil nodded. It was the busiest time of year for them as they mass produced gaming videos, while trying to keep up with live shows, their own channels, the business side of things, and getting ready for leaving for Christmas. They were around the 16th or 17th day of Gamingmas, and already they were behind. They needed to finish editing and release the new video by nine, which was only two hours away, and then they had the next three videos filmed that they would have to edit as well. It was no wonder Dan didn’t want to make dinner.

“I’ll order something,” Phil offered. “Or, if you’d like, I could edit the video?”

Dan shook his head. “You did the last few. I need to do my share.”

“You need to take care of yourself first,” Phil correcred, trying to be gentle. He took his boyfriend’s hands in his, squeezing them reassuringly. “I really won’t mind.”

Dan bit his lip, looking at their hands. Then he pulled away. “Thanks. But I need to do this.” He pulled out his phone from his pocket and immediately winced. “Shit, it’s already past seven. How long was the first video?”

“Less than 40 minutes, I think.”

“Shit. Shit. I’ve got to get started, we shouldn’t have filmed that last one-”

“Dan, it’ll be okay.”

“I’m going to…” Dan gestured towards his room, quickly walking to it and closing the door.

Phil sighed. Finally, he got out his phone and rang for a pizza.

——-

Dan had been editing for over an hour when the pizza came. Phil immediately put some on a plate and went to his room, knocking once before letting himself in.

Dan was completely immersed in the editing, his headphones over his ears and his eyes trained on the computer. He was humming slightly, which was a good sign.

Phil set the plate on the desk besides him and Dan pulled off one of the ears of the headphones, still looking at the screen. “Thanks.” He didn’t touch the pizza.

“Come on, take a break. Just ten minutes.”

“We only have… 49 left. Shit.”

“Dan, no one cares if we post it right on time.”

“We have to though! We can’t miss our window, it has to be directly at nine here, so that way it’s at two in America.”

“Dan, we won’t miss the window if the video is ten minutes late.” Dan didn’t respond, so Phil tried another approach. He put both hands on Dan’s shoulders, trying to massage the tension from them. “Come on. Just ten minutes. Eat with me.” Dan still didn’t do anything, so Phil bent down, pressing a small kiss underneath his ear.

“Phil, I need to focus.” Dan still didn’t look at him.

Phil straightened, pouting, and Dan immediately replaced the headphone over his ear.

———-

Phil was sitting on the couch when his phone buzzed. He opened it, and saw that it was the notification saying that a new video had been posted on DanAndPhilGames, at nine sharp.

He got up and went to Dan’s room to congratulate him. When he got there, Dan was leaning back in his chair, looking exhausted. “Thanks for doing that Dan. Come on, let’s get you out of that chair. Do you want to watch a movie?”

Dan stayed tight and unmoving, not looking at Phil. He gave a small shake of his head.

“Dan-”

“I’m going to start editing the next video. So we don’t have a repeat of this tomorrow.”

“Dan, you look exhausted.”

Finally, finally, Dan turned around and looked at him, his eye bags especially present. “I am exhausted. But there’s work to do.” He swiveled back around.

“Oh my God.” Phil marched over and grappled with Dan for the mouse, finally tearing it out of his hand. He went to the top corner and clicked the save button, then immediately powered off the computer. “Come on, get up.”

Dan looked at him, his expression blank but clearly not pleased. “What the hell, Phil.”

“I said get up. You’re making yourself miserable, and frankly, you smell. Take a shower, or a bath, or something.”

Dan didn’t even blink. “No. I don’t want to.”

But Phil didn’t care. He pulled out Dan’s chair, wheeling him towards the door while Dan protested weakly all the while. “What the fuck, Phil, what the actual fuck? Stop it, I have videos to edit!”

The desk chair didn’t want to wheel through the bathroom doorway, so Phil huffed and pulled it back. “You need to take care of yourself. Did you take your meds today?”

“Fuck you.”

Phil reached down and pulled Dan to his feet, but Dan didn’t move. Phil tried to drag him forwards, but in an act of complete stubbornness, Dan went limp in Phil’s arms.

“Dan! I need you to help me out here!”

“I refuse!”

“Dan, come on!”

“Where the fuck was my consent?”

Phil managed to haul him upwards and drag him into the bathroom, where he set him down against the wall. Dan leaned back against in in exhaustion, staring at Phil with a look of annoyance only amplified by his dark circles.

Phil went over to the tub and turned it on. “A nice hot bath. That’ll do you good, don’t you think?”

Dan didn’t respond. He looked away, his entire body still limp.

Phil went over to sit with him, taking Dan’s hand gently and intertwining their fingers together. Dan looked at their hands tiredly. “I’ll edit the videos tomorrow morning. Tonight we can go to bed early, okay? I think we both need it.”

Dan looked up at him, his lips pursed. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry,” Phil said, even more gently. “Come on. We all need a little extra support sometimes.” He glanced behind him. “I think the bath is done. Do you want to take your clothes off while I finish getting it ready?”

Dan made a little nodding motion, which Phil considered progress. He went and turned the faucet off, making sure the water was the right temperature before pouring some soap in the water, swirling it around. “I know it’s kind of girly, but I really like this soap. You’ll have to tell me what you think.” He looked over to Dan, who almost had his shirt over his head. “Want some help there?”

Phil went over and helped Dan get his shirt off, then helped him stand and had him lean against the counter as he got to his knees. “I read that baths are good for your mental health, and are actually better for the environment than taking a long shower.”

Dan just grunted. He kept himself up as Phil undid his jeans, pulling them down Dan’s legs carefully, having to tug to get them all the way down. “Pants too?”

“No Phil, I’m going to take a bath with my pants on.”

Phil took that as a yes, please and pulled Dan’s boxers down to. Then he helped him into the tub, watching Dan’s eyes close and he sunk into the bubbles. After a moment, Dan opened just one eye. “Well? Come on, get in here.”

Phil hadn’t been planning on joining Dan, but Dan’s expression made it clear what he wanted. So Phil quickly stripped and after Dan made room for him, climbed in beside him.

“You’re making waves,” Dan grumbled.

“Oh noooo! Tsame!” Phil said as he turned over, making a wave splash Dan.

Dan almost smiled. “It’s called a tsunami, dweeb.”

“Tsunami!” Phil splashed him again.

Dan got an inch closer to smiling, his lips pursed together. “Scoot over, you’re all up in my space.”

Phil smiled back at him, trying to respect him and move over, but the bathtub was only so big.

“I hate everything,” Dan said, pouting as he drew circles on the surface of the pink bathwater. “Why did we ever think Gamingmas was a good idea?”

“Do you want to stop doing it?” Phil offered.

Dan hesitated, then shook his head. “It’s a good thing,” he decided. “Just not… /that/ good of a thing.”

“It’s a challenge,” Phil agreed.

“I don’t really want to talk anymore,” Dan admitted. “Too tired.”

“We could cuddle? I mean, we might slip, but-”

“Just…” Dan tilted Phil’s face towards him, looking him over. “We could… um…” he leaned in, awkwardly pecking Phil on the lips.

“Yeah. I like that.” Phil leaned in and kissed him, more properly, and Dan immediately responded, reaching around to grasp at the back of Phil’s head with one of his wet hands.

Phil tried to pull back a little, but Dan just took the opportunity to push on him more so that he was almost on top of Phil’s chest, the water filling in between them. Phil took the cue and opened his mouth, deepening the kiss. His hands made their way to Dan’s back, gently pressing him closer.

“Fuck Gamingmas,” Dan mumbled into the kiss. “And fuck everything else too.”

Phil pinched him lightly, murmuring “language” into the kiss, his voice deeper and huskier than normal.

“Sorry.” Dan carefully pulled away from the kiss, getting up so he wasn’t on Phil’s chest as much. “Move over a bit? More to the middle.”

Phil gave him a questioning look, but moved over.

“And sit back a bit more?”

Phil scooted back so he was sitting up more, and Dan carefully crawled over him, straddling him. “This is a risky game you’re playing, Danny,” Phil warned.

“Yeah, well let’s both just keep our own business to ourselves, okay? I’m only looking for some PG-13 action, no bathtub porn, okay?”

Phil responded by grabbing both of his thighs and pulled him closer, making both of Dan’s knees touch the side of the tub. Dan grabbed onto Phil’s shoulders to steady himself, quickly leaning in and tilting his head to the side to kiss him, rocking his body into the kiss.

Phil let his hands go back up to Dan’s back, holding him as he leaned him back, kissing more aggressively. Dan grabbed onto the back of Phil’s neck to keep himself up, but didn’t break away from the kiss. “Phil… Phil… I’m going to slip.”

Without breaking the kiss, Phil yanking Dan’s hands away from his neck and pushed him back. Dan splashed as his knees surfaced, but Phil was keeping him upright still. Dan wrapped his arms around his neck, kissing back. “We’re making such a mess,” he mumbled.

“It’s fine,” Phil reassured. “Come here.”

Phil pulled him sideways onto his lap, one arm supported Dan’s back, the other around the underneath of his knees. Dan rested against his chest, smiling up at Phil as he allowed himself to be cradled. “I love you. You know that, right?”

Phil smiled back. “Yeah. Just like you know I love you.”

“Yeah, but you don’t like, cuss me out and get annoyed at me that often. I guess I’m not that great of a boyfriend, huh?”

Phil’s smile immediately dissolved. “Don’t say that! You’re a great boyfriend. You’re just also human.”

Dan groaned, his slippery skin still pressed against Phil’s. “Ugh, why can’t I just be perfect like you.”

He leaned closer, but Phil didn’t close the gap just yet. “I’m not perfect.”

Dan’s eyes flickered between Phil’s eyes and his lips. “You are to me.”

Phil watched Dan, looking for any sign that he wasn’t being serious. He found none. “Your hair is all dirty,” he decided finally. “You need to wash it.”

Dan was about to ask what he meant when Phil tightened his grip on him, dipping him backwards into the water quickly and pulling him back up, spluttering. “Phi-il!”

Phil stuck his tongue out, giggling so hard Dan could feel it in his chest. “Don’t think you’re getting away with this Lester!” He pushed his hands off of him, crawling off of Phil and shoving him to the side, but Phil caught himself before hitting the waterline, still giggling. Dan tackled him, and this time they both went under.

They submerged, and Phil wiped the water off of his face, his hair sticking to his forehead. Dan grinned evilly, his wet curls still looking unfairly good. He squealed as Phil tackled him, their lips connecting in a kiss right as they hit the water.