#OH LOOK THEY MADE A FIC OF US US

[coy-lee]

Cheater, Cheater

@afloofwithmultipleinterests and I had a mIGHTY NEEEED.

And someone in my ask box stirred it up lol. You know who you are >:3

Anyway, there was a need to write some muy fluffy content involving a jester and a spambot. So if you're into that kind of content, stop on by and take a look.

Description: Spamton and Jevil do battle quite often. Spamton feels like Jevil is hiding the secret to freedom in that cell of his. Jevil knows better than that and would rather keep Spamton from finding out the no such secret exists. So, they duke it out, both wanting to win for their own reasons. This time, though, Jevil is a bit worried about how good Spamton has gotten at fighting him...so he takes the battle in a different direction. A very fun direction.

Cheater, Cheater

He was back at the gate. He'd have to beat him eventually, right? Right! He'd have to... He had to. Spamton didn't need the key. Due to his broken nature, he could glitch right through the invisible door and straight into the void Jevil called home. He never knew what to expect when entering the jester's domain. The decor changed quite often, although it was always themed around the circus.

The stairwell above echoed with the sound of Spamton's heels tapping against the hard floor as he walked near the bars. The inside was just as dark as always, making chills go down Spamton's spine. He couldn't chicken out now no matter what. Before Spamton could glitch through the door, the imp materialized himself from the shadows, bells jingling behind him. 

"BOO HOO, BOO HOO, UEE HEE HEE! SO LONELY, SO LONELY I BE.. BUT LO, THREE VISI-" Jevil paused as he recognized Spamton almost instantly. "OH- ITS NOT A RESET, RESET! WHAT A WONDERFUL SURPRIZE!" The jester exclaimed in an illusionary tone of jubilation. "OH COME OUT, COME OUT! LET YOURSELF OUTSIDE, SPAMMY! WHAT FUN WE'LL HAVE, HAVE!"

Spamton groaned, already tired of the clown's antics. A small door appeared within the wall of bars before him. Jevil seemingly created it as a gag. Spamton walked through the door, only to step into a clown-themed tea room, but instead of there being a teapot, a gallon of carbonated 'Clown-Juice' sat in the middle of the table. There were various other jester themed decorations around the room, some that made sense... and some that didn't. Jevil proceeded to turn the chairs around, their backs against the table. 

"HERE! I EVEN PUSHED UP YOUR SEAT FOR YA!"

 The imp sat down in one of the chairs, holding up a spades teacup and slurping his drink as loudly as he could. 

"I'M NOT A [[kids 6 and under]]! AND YOU'RE [[insane deal]] IF Y OU THINK I'LL [[one big gulp!]] ANY 0F TH4T [[WHOOPY JUICE!!!]]" Spamton shouted, trying to establish some ounce of dominance in the clown's realm. He had been here many times before. Even though it wasn't his pocket of unreality, Spamton was now quite familiar with the place... or at least used to expecting the unexpected.  "Y0U KNOW DAMN WELL WHY I [[cruising around town]] DOWN HERE AND 1T ISN'T FOR A [[dinner for two]]."

Jevil went oddly quiet, however his smile widened. The table disappeared, and Jevil began to chug from the teacup he had in his gloved hand. After he was done he tossed the glass behind him, and it exploded similarly to how a certain prissy and popular queen's glass would back in Spamton's dark world. 

"ENLIGHTEN ME, ENLIGHTEN ME!" Jevil started, a smirk replacing his usual cold smile. "IS IT TO PLAY A CARD GAME? OH! OR A GAME OF TAG? OR- OH! I KNOW! YOU WANNA TELL JOKES, JOKES!? OH I LOVE JOKES, AND LAUGHING! I BET IT'S BEEN AWHILE SINCE YOU'VE LAUGHED, RIGHT?" Jevil's word vomit was soon cut off by Spamton who was taken aback by that last query.

"I'LL HAVE YO U KNOW THAT I [[unintelligible laughter]] PLENTY, ESPECIALLY AFTER I [[GAME OVER]] YOU [[juggalo]]!" Spamton countered, gritting his teeth. Admittedly, he was starting to feel the adrenaline rush and the nervousness right behind it. He wouldn't lose again. He WOULDN'T, but doubt was fluttering in his stomach. He could never tell what was going on in Jevil's mind. As an Addison, Spamton was used to predicting people's habits, wants and needs, but Jevil was a severe outlier, and that drove the salesman nuts.

"UEE HEE HEE!" His laugh was hollow, but imitated glee. "SO ITS THE OLD NUMBER'S GAME YOU WANT!" The clown tapped a gloved finger to his chin a moment in genuine thought, before snapping his tail similarly to fingers. He smiled widely at Spamton, his eyes sparkling with an unknown intent. "IF YOU INSIST... I'LL PLAY THAT GAME! BUT I WONT GO EASY ON YOU PINNOCHIO, CHIO~" 

Jevil turned Into his devilsknive, cracking the ground open to where he and Spamton would fall through into the endless void of space. It was the perfect place to battle... an empty canvas of freedom.

"AAYEGUFFFAH! [[$!?!]] WOULD IT [[killed]] YOU TO M4KE IT A SOFTER LANDING? [[JIMINY CHRISTMAS]]" Spamton exclaimed as he slowly got up, rubbing his bottom to relieve the pain from the sudden fall. He quickly shook it off. He had a fight to win. He couldn't let a little surprise like that throw him off. That was Jevil's whole shtick. Surprises. He huffed, getting himself ready for anything.

"BETTER BE QUICK ON YOUR TOES, TOES!" Jevil teased before healing Spamton up with magic for a fairly unfair battle, touching his shoulder to transfer the magic to his HP. "WHO KNOWS, KNOWS... MAYBE YOU'LL OUTSMART ME FOR A CHANGE!" Jevil vaguely encouraged, making spamton feel a little more hopeful... for only a few seconds. "EMPHASIS ON MAYBE." The puppet would scowl at the Imp if he could. Jevil disappeared, reappearing way across from Spamton, dancing and putting on a stage show for the lone audience member. "YOU CAN HAVE THE FIRST MOVE, MOVE!"

"OOOOH NONONO. I'M NOT F4LLING FOR   THAT [[tips and tricks]]. IF I GO FIRST YOU'LL [[uno reverse]] ME. [[Ladies first]], I INSIST," Spamton replied with a devilish grin of his own.

"OKIE DOKIE~ IF YOU INSIST THAT YOU INSIST!" Jevil shrugged, summoning his cliche card-deck bullets, shooting them in various patterns at Spamton, the puppet dodging them effortlessly by jumping, and defying gravity. He had gotten better since the last thousand attempts at trying to beat Jevil... To say the least, the imp was impressed. However, Jevil couldn't let that puppet find out the truth.  That's honestly what made the clown refuse to let Spamton win... It was the puppet's motivation that scared the jester. That was why Jevil needed to win no matter what, or else... Spamton would lose that spark he himself lost so long ago.

The carousel appeared, however it was a bit different. The top and lower border were see-sawing while it spun around, and around. Jevil shot his arms out straight in a T-Pose, summoning various rocking animals with his chaotic magic as they followed along to the beat of the carousel. ... However, despite that fact, Spamton was keeping up, and only got hit once. This was making Jevil kind of nervous..

The nervousness Spamton was feeling before began to wane as he was off to the best start he'd ever had. The carousel was one of the more difficult moves for Spamton to dodge, so this success was a promising sign. So long as Jevil stayed on his script of magical acts, the puppet had a chance.

"IS THAT THE [[Best in the business!]] 

Y OU'VE GOT, [[FOOL]]!? AHEAHEAHEA!" Spamton summoned a phone and spun it in the air like a lasso before flinging it directly at Jevil. The jester shot up into the air to avoid the attack only for the ringing coming from the phone to echo and bounce around the invisible box they were battling in. Jevil danced around most of the sound waves, only being nicked by one.

The carousel started to slow back to its original pace, but kept seesawing. Perhaps Jevil would have to up his game!

 "FAR FROM IT PIKACHU, I'M JUST GETTIN' STARTED, STARTED! METAMORPHOSIS!" The clown transformed into his weapon form, boomeranging around spamton, and lunging at him every 8th of a second. After a few throuple hits, spamton caught onto the pattern, and used mini-spams as deflections to catapult the attention away from himself. Jevil growled a little in frustration as tiny baby Spamtons jumped in his way as he tried to hit Spamton. His smile, however, never left his face.

"YOU FORGET I HAVE [[the boys]] WITH ME AT ALL TIMES? SPEAKING OF WHICH, HOW ABOUT WE PLAY [[DODGE PIPIS!]]" Spamton exclaimed, hurling pipis after pipis at the jester like they were snowballs... Explosive snowballs!

Jevil had just changed back into his normal form when spamton attacked, catching the jester off guard. "OH SEAM IN THE ANGEL'S HEAVEN-" Jevil got hit by three, which knocked his head off his block, springing up and down on his coiled spring neck. If Spamton could use decoys, so could he! Jevil sped up, admittedly tiring him out more than he liked. He went so fast, duplicates of himself were summoned, and it was hard for Spamton to pinpoint a target. ... Jevil had to think of something QUICK, Or else.. that last speck of hope in spamton may die. Wait... he knew! Jevil just needed an opportunity to escape this blue egg barrage... 

"ALTHOUGH A BIT EGGS-TREME, YOUR MOVE IS QUITE A BLAST!"

"..."

Spamton stopped in the middle of a throw, his brain processing what he just heard. Dial-up sounds took over his speech while his glasses blue-screened temporarily. After a moment, he shook his head like a dog, coming back to reality... and he let out the biggest most tortured groan.

"UUUUUUUUHHHHG... THOSE PUNS WERE   SO [[rotten to the core]] I THINK I'M GONNA THROW UP! @c@" Spamton grimaced, glaring at the clown grinning back at him, proud as can be.

As expected, Spamton recoiled his attacks to revive from that hard, mental blow of awful punnery. Jevil teleported away from his spot, into the void, plotting a sneak attack Spamton would never expect out of the likes of him... at least not one in the midst of battle. After the doll was done cringing, he was about to dodge jevil's attack... when he noticed the imp was no longer there. Now THAT wasn't fair!

"HEY WISE GUY! WHAT'S THE BIG [[deal!]] HIDING IS [[cheater cheater pumpkin eater!]]" 

Silence. Complete and utter silence... until he felt two gloves vibrate into his sides, startling him. He spun around, only to see nobody there.

"AYEE! H-HEY! F4CE   ME LIKE A [[valued customer]]!" Spamton shouted, his voice cracking as he was surprised by the sudden assault to his sides. He did a decent job of keeping his composure. Now he needed to stay vigilant. That clown could be anywhere.

"FACE YA LIKE A VALUED CUSTOMER, CUSTOMER?" Jevil giggled, appearing behind him again, however this time the gloves were off. The devil poked slowly up, and down the glitch's ribs. "LAST TIME I CHECKED IT WAS OPPOSITE DAY IN THE DARK WORLDS, WORLDS! IM THE SALESMAN, AND YOU'RE THE CUSTOMER! CAN YOU GUESS WHAT I'M SELLIN~?" 

A mischievous smile stretched across the joker's features. Spamton wiggled, his hands shooting down to grab Jevil's fingers, but he had already disappeared again.

"GYA!TYEEHEEHE- [[$!?!]] THE PRESSES! W-WHAT ARE YOU    DOING!?" the puppet demanded, wide eyed and looking in every direction to locate the culprit. "Y OU'RE NOT PLAYING [[fair share]], CLOWN!"

"I'M NOT PLAYIN FAIR, FAIR?" The jester's voice echoed against the void. The joker in question  chuckled from the darkness at this new game that would surely tire this puppet out. "WELL THERE'S NOTHING IN THE RULES AGAINST A LITTLE..." Jevil now appeared in front of him, a devious grin spread across his cheeks,"GIGGLY, GIGGLY, TICKLE, TICKLE NOW AND THEN~ BELIEVE ME, I DOUBLE CHECKED AND IT'S COMPLETELY LEGAL!" Jevil wiggled his eight fingers at Spamton, dull claws catching the dealmaker's attention. He jumped back, tripping a little bit before putting his hand up in defense as Jevil floated closer with that playfully evil stare.

"W-W-WAIT! HOLD 0N! Y-Y-YOU THINK THAT [[silly billy]] MOVE WILL WORK ON [[number1ratedsalesman1997]]? HA! TOO BAD FOR Y OU! I'M NOT [[tickles your fancy]]," Spamton retorted, squaring up, crossing his arms defiantly, and standing his ground. He knew Jevil wouldn't buy what he was selling, but he had to try. Unfortunately, though he was a good actor, the sudden rosiness of his cheeks called his bluff.

"OH... YOU AREN'T?" Jevil pretended to look convinced, before shrugging. "WELL... GUESS I WAS WRONG! I KNOW YOU'RE AN HONEST, HONEST SALESMAN. HMPH...  FIGURES... GUESS ILL HAVE TO JUST USE MY SPECIAL ATTACK, ATTACK!" Jevil shrugged, sounding disappointed... Did Spamton's lie actually work!? YES!!! THAT HAD NEVER WORKED! It hadn't worked on any Addison that had asked him, or even Seam! But somehow it worked on JEVIL!? Spamton thought he would see through that scam! Jevil really was a fool... 

"WHAT A [[sham]]. GUESS IT'LL HAVE TO DO! IM SURE I CAN HANDLE [[Specil move]]."

"YOU SUUUUURE...? IT'S PRETTY HARD TO DODGE!" Jevil smirked, summoning Spamton's own smirk.

"AH! SHOWING YOUR HAND, HUH? WELL Y OUR [[light shower]] OF SCYTHES IS IMPRESSIVE, BUT NOT SPECIL ENOUGH T0 DEFEAT ME," the salesman replied cheekily. His blush receded as his confidence grew once more. He could handle this. Jevil's special attack was always that giant scythe move.

" LET'S GET THIS [[show on the road]]. THEN I'LL SHOW YOU A RE4L ATTACK!" Spamton taunted.

"WE'LL SEE SPAMTON, SPAMTON!" Jevil flew back over in position before metamorphosing into a scythe, and shooting up towards the ceiling. One scythe fell down, then another and another and another... Spamton knew the rhythm of this attack, becoming a pro at dodging the basic attacks Jevil would usually give the player. 

After all the scythes fell, it left the giant undodgeable one to slowly fall. Spamton braced for impact, raising his arms above his head to protect his plastic noggin upon impact... but it never came. He opened a single eye to see two clawed hands hovering above his underarms, but he was too late to correct his fatal mistake. Jevil touched down, scribbling, and drawing shapes with his nails across the cloth of the salesman's jacket, which was surprisingly thinner than spamton had remembered. 

He tried to fight it, but he couldn't hold in what he didn't expect to come out!

"AYEEEEAHEAHEAHEAHEA! TH-THAHAHAT'S NOT HOHOHOW THIS WOR-GYYYAaAaAaA!" Spamton squealed out, clamping his arms down, knees buckling immediately. He was falling backwards into Jevil's hold due to his weak knees. The puppet took a deep breath to spit out the last coherent sentence he would be saying for a while.

"PLEASE-JEVIL-YOU-DON'T-HAVE-T0-DO-THIS-WE'RE-FRIENDS-R1GHT-PAL-I'LL-GIVE-Y0U-BEST-DEALS-4-LIFE-I-SWEAR!!!"

"JEVIL, JEVIL!?" Jevil paused as soon as he heard his name. His ACTUAL name... Spamton had never said his actual name before! "YOU CALLED ME JEVIL!!" Overjoyed, he squeezed Spamton in a rib cracking hug.

"AG-G-G-GYUH-Y-YOUR EARS MUST BE [[out of batteries]]! I-UHG- NEVER SAID [[legal name]]!" Spamton wheezed out, wiggling to free himself from Jevil's crushing grip.

Jevil loosened his hug a bit, however not enough to let Spamton out of his grasp. "HMMM... YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU'RE RIGHT! I CAN'T HEAR ANYTHING BECAUSE OF HOW HARD YOU'RE LAUGHING!"

"WH-" Jevil started tickling again, one arm around Spamton's chest, raising his undershirt up, and the other hand trailing around the doll's stomach. 

"COOOOCHIE COOCHIE COO LITTLE SALESMAN~ ARE YOU TICKLISH, TICKLISH HERE HM? I THINK I CAN HEAR YOU GIGGLING, GIGGLING! I'M TOO DEAF TO HEAR REALLY ANYTHING, SO I'M NOT TOO SURE~!" Jevil noticed a little X where Spamton's bellybutton was supposed to be. He stored that information for much later in his playfully evil onslaught.

"STYAHAHAHAHEAHEAHEAHEA![[HOLY TOLEDO]] NYEAHEAHEAHEAHEAHEA!" Spamton cackled, squirming and kicking aimlessly in the clutches of the clown. He tried to grab at the offending hand exploring his sensitive belly.

Jevil pretended to just now notice his tail was plugging his ears. "OHHHH... THERE WAS THE PROBLEM! NOW I CAN HEAR YOU JUUUUST FINE! UHEHEHEHEEE... SUCH A TICKLISH LITTLE TUM-TUM, HM? GEEZ, I DUNNO HOW YOU CAN STAND IT, NO WAY I'D LAST! TIIIICKLE TICKLE TICKLE, TIIIICKLE~ KITCHY KIIITCH~"

"OHOHO MYHYHYHY GOHOHOHOHOD! SHUHUHUHUT YOUR [[PIE HOLE]] YOU- AYEEHEEHEEHEEHEEHEEEEE!" the puppet cried out. The tickling was already making him lose all control, and that was embarrassing enough, but the teasing? Jevil was going to kill him with all that sickeningly sweet baby talk. You could hardly make out Spamton's red cheeks due to how red the rest of his face was. All he wanted to do was curl up in a ball and hide from his adversary, but he wasn't in a position to do that. All he could do was flail and squeal... But the part that truly made the salesman want to hide was the fact that... he didn't hate this... At all. 

BUT HIS WORST ENEMY COULD NEVER KNOW THAT SO-

"THIHIHIHIHIHIS IHIHIHIHIS [[AGAINST THE GENEVA CONVENTION]] YOHOHOHOHOU ANIMAHAHAL!"

"A WAR CRIME? KEHEHE~" Jevil stopped, letting Spamton catch his breath. The puppet relaxed, his giggling mixed in with static as he panted. "SMILING DURING A WARCRIME DOESN'T SEEM VERY ORDERLY... THEN AGAIN I WOULDN'T KNOW ABOUT ORDER, ORDER! UEE HEE EHEE~ I THINK YOU ENJOY, ENJOY THIS, DON'T YOU SPAM-MAN?" Jevil questioned, a rare, genuine smile coming out.

"W-W-WHAT!? N-N-NO!!! THAT'S [[Crazy bread]]! I'M A PROFESSIONAL! I'M A [[BIGSHOT]]! BIGSHOTS DON'T-

DON'T -

DON'T -

DON'T -" 

Spamton glitched, his glasses blue screening again. His entire face to the tip of his nose was bright red, steam puffed out from the sides of his head, and a car horn beeped, the sound coming from Spamton's agape mouth.

Jevil chortled a bit, letting his battle buddy let the embarrassment out of his system. "DON'T WHAT? DON'T HAVE FUN, FUN? WHAT'S WRONG WITH A LITTLE GIGGLE EVERY NOW AND THEN, HM?" Jevil questioned out of curiosity, and assurance. "ITS OKAY TO BE GOOFY AND FEEL GOOFY EVERY NOW AND AGAIN, AGAIN! DON'T YOU THINK SO?" Jevil poked just a single digit on Spamton's side just above his hip, feather light to just get giggles out of the salesman.

"GyeYEEhehehehe NOHOHOhoho!" Spamton laughed, shaking his head and trying to hide his face with his hands. He was no longer trying to stop Jevil's hands, now focusing on covering his red hot cheeks. "J-JEVIL IHEEHEEHeehee CAHAHAHAN'T!" He jerked away from the prodding finger and was able to rock forward, still breathless with giggles as he weakly attempted to crawl away.

Jevil giggled sinisterly, floating after spamton before grabbing both of his ankles. "GYEHEHE~? NYOHO YOU CAN'T? TELL ME STOP AND MAYBE I'LL BELIEVE YOU~!"  Spamton fell on his padded tum as the devil pulled his legs out straight and sat on the back of his knees, hovering those ungloved claws above spamton's shoed tootsies. "UNTIL THEN, I GUESS ILL HAVE FUN WITH AN ENSY WEENSIE SPOT YOU DECIDED TO LEAVE OPEN~" Jevil playfully reminded, before slipping off both of those flat heeled leather shoes the salesman always wore. With no money to afford socks for those old shoes he found in the trash, Spamton's plush little feet were now completely exposed. 

oh. NO.

"W-W-WAIT! TH-THAHAHAT'S EVIL!" Spamton's eyes widened to the size of saucers when he felt himself get pinned under the jester's weight. "THOSE ARE [[fine Italian leather]] YOU [[little sponge]]!" A wobbly smile stretched across the peddler's face just from the threat alone. He curled up his toes, trying to get ready for what was to come.

"REALLY!? I THOUGHT THESE WERE PLEATHER!" Jevil teased, tracing two nails down  tiny feet, the delicate jointed toes scrunching up in response. Spamton snorted, trying to cover his mouth to hide his giggles and high pitched squeals. He only uncovered it to speak. "IHIT'S UHUP TO PLAHAHAYER INTERPRETAHATION!!" His puppet hands slammed back over his teeth, one trying to keep his bottom jaw closed and the other attempting to block the puppet mouth gap.

And with that.. another finger joined on both feet, now swirling and wiggling. 

"OHO... IT ISNT HEALTHY TO HOLD BACK YOUR LAUGHTER SPAMTON! LET IT AAAALL OUT. KEHEHEE~"

"NNN-NNNGYKHKHKHK... MMM-PFFFFFTAHAHEAHEAHEAHEA!" Spamton finally burst out into hysterics. He was slapping the floor, trying to find relief from the sensations plaguing his tiny feetsies.

"OH MY FOX! SEE? ARENT YOU HAVING FUN? YOU SEEM TO BE ENJOYING YOURSELF! UEEHEHEHEE~" Jevil teased, ever so gently raking his nails over every inch of the doll's feet, including under and between those lil' toesies! "WE SHOULD BATTLE LIKE THIS MORE OFTEN! THIS KIND OF GAME IS SO MUCH MORE FUN THAN THAT OLD NUMBERS GAME!'' Jevil turned around slightly, seeing the jolly old puppet snorting, and thumping his fists on the ground. Snickering, the joker pulled away, turning around to face him, still on seated Spamton's knees. The imp temporarily stood to gently maneuver spamton facing up so the puppet could catch his breath easier. 

"YOUHOU OKAY PINOCCHIO?" Jevil asked, giggling a bit at Spamton's expression.

"@c@ I'M -pant- STILL [[breathing the fresh air!]]" the spambot replied, recovering from that last attack. He rubbed his feet together to shoo away those dastardly phantom tickles left behind. "BUT I WILL NOT CONCEDE TO YOUR [[TOMFOOLERY]]. NEVER..."

"NEVER YOU SAY, SAY?" Spamton should NOT have given the jester such a sweet treat of an opening... 

Jevil picked the puppet up under the arms, bringing the salesman onto his lap with a previous idea brewing to the forefront of his mind.

"PERHAPS THE RIGHT SPOT WOULD CHANGE YOUR MIND~" Jevil smirked, pulling Spamton's shirt back up from before revealing his plush tum, booping a side just barely with the pad of his finger, keeping his claws to himself for the time being.

"EEHEEHEEP! R-RIGHT SPOT? N-NO THERE ARE NOT MORE [[spot remover]] I SWEAR. Y-YOU'RE WASTING YOUR [[time sensitive offer]]..." Spamton rushed out. He giggled nervously and gave Jevil a pleading look... but he still never said the magic word. Instead, the salesman grabbed onto the jester's hands, holding them away from his body.

"NO MORE SPOTS? OH NO, NO, NO! I THINK YOU'VE FORGOTTEN, FORGOTTEN A FEW MISTER~!" Jevil giggled gently pushing Spamton's arms back, the salesman's arms still jelly after the prior attacks. "LIKE THESE TWO HIPS!" Jevil kneaded his thumbs into the joints, just barely skimming the doll's sides with his claws.  Spamton flailed, kicking those little legs of his faster than a roadrunner. 

"HAAEHAHEHEEHEA!! [[Fifty percent off!]] JEHEH-SNORT! [[Ha ha ha!]]AHAAH-" 

"OOOOOORRRR..." Jevil crawled his hands to Spamton's sides and started to tickle that stuffed tum of his! "THIS LITTLE SWEET SPOT RIGHT HERE, HERE!"

"GYAAAHAEHEAHEAHEAHEA! NAHAHAT THE [[tummy wummy]]! AYEEHEEHEEHEE!" The spambot was lightly slapping at Jevil's chest as he squirmed fruitlessly. "YOHOHOURE THE DEHEHEVIL!"

"NOT THE TUMMY WUMMY? AW! BUT YOU SOUND LIKE YOU LOVE, LOVE THIS ON YOUR TUMMY WUMMY!" Jevil cooed, slowing the tickles down to be gentle. "DEVIL IS IN MY NAME! DON'T WEAR IT OUT~ OH! SPEAKING OF BEING EVIL,"  Jevil trailed off, drawing a single swirling finger around the canvas of spamton's belly, slithering around his middle in circles like a snake. "I WANNA SEE WHAT KIND OF GIGGLY TREASURE I CAN GET FROM THAT X!"

"NONONOHOHOHO! THAT [[parking spot]] IS [[out of commission]]! D-DOHOHON'T Y OU DAHAHAHARE!" Spamton squealed in protest. He immediately slapped his hands over his belly button to guard it from the devious clown.

"WELL THATS NOT VERY NICE!" Jevil teased, a challenging grin stretching onto his face... did Spamton really think he would only use his hands to tickle him to snorts? "GUESS WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO DO THIS THE HARD WAY... SAY, SPAMTON," the imp stretched his tail around and bent the tips of the J to tuck under the dummy's arms.  "I DON'T RECALL, BUT IS THIS A TERRIBLY, TERRIBLY SENSITIVE AREA~? COOOCHIE COOCHIE COOO LITTLE ADDISON~"

"NYAHAEHAEHAEHAEHAE! YOHOHOU [[$!?!]]!" That clever move by Jevil did the trick. Spamton immediately clamped his arms down, bringing his fists up to his chest. "STYAHAHAP TEASING MEEHEEHEEHEEHEE!"

"DO YOU NOT LIKE BEING TEASED TO BITS, SPAMMY? ALSO, IF YOU WANT TO KEEP MY TAIL UNDER YOUR ARMS, BE MY GUEST! OTHERWISE, OTHERWISE YOU CAN RAISE THEM UP AND TRY YOUR LUCK! UEEHEEHEE!'' While explaining this in a playful tone, Jevil went back to swirling around the little belly pudge, getting closer and closer to the spot of buried belly laughs.

"AHEAHAEHAEHAEHAE! YOU'RE GOHOHONNAHAHA [[killed]] MEEEEHEEHEE! SNORT!" the salesman cackled, hardly able to focus enough to make any comebacks. He was losing his mind, but he wasn't ready to surrender to this fiend.

Jevil etched closer... and closer... until finally he swirled right onto the little X, before stopping entirely. Everything stopped in place, the movement under his arms, the swirling, all that was on focus was the finger sitting still on the little stitch. Jevil gave Spamton a cat-like look of mischief, not doing anything but waiting out the inevitable. "YOU KNOW WHAT? LET'S STAY LIKE THIS A MOMENT, MOMENT! YOU ENJOYIN' YOURSELF? I KNOW A GENUINE SMILE WHEN I SEE ONE~" In actuality.. Jevil was planning his ultra tickle attack in the back of his mind during this one-sided conversation before finally unleashing the mother of all tickles.

"I-pant- [[dont trust like that]]... YOU... -pant- YOUR TEASING ME AGAIN! I-pant- I ADMIT TO NOTHING!" Spamton said defiantly. Maybe he could tough it out…

"DON'T TRUST ME? WHY SPAMMY! WHAT HAVE I DONE FOR YOU NOT TO TRUST ME?!" the joker questioned, feigning innocence. Spamton knew better than to trust a literal Jester devil after tickling him half to death when they were having a fair and square battle just before! Whatever happened to that anyway!? This wasn't fair at all! Spamton was getting tired. The look the doll gave Jevil after saying that said it all.

"AW... SPAMTON, I'M HURT! HEARTBROKEN, SHOT IN THE CHEST!" Jevil overdramatized, cocking an arm over his forehead, Spamton not seeming to notice both hands were off his belly. The puppet slowly but surely caught his breath as Jevil did his theatrics, all the while giving the purple imp a look of suspicion. After a moment, Jevil smirked, bringing a single arm around Spamton's ribs in a gentle hug to keep him still. "WELL, I THINK YOU DESERVE A PRESENT FOR BEIN SUCH A GOOD SPORT, AND HAVING AN ADORABLE LIL LAUGH!"

"I-I-I-I [[shut your yaps]]! WHAT ARE Y 0U PLANNING JEVIL?" the doll inquired suspiciously, his cheeks flushed from the embarrassing compliment on top.

"I DUNNO, DUNNO! I THINK IM PLANNING ON GIVING YOU A PRESENT FOR BEING A SNORTY, FLUFFY LITTLE GIGGLEBUG!" Jevil replied, his smirk unhindered. He leaned down just a little bit, trying to be inconspicuous.

"I-I'M NOT [[soft and fluffy]]! AND DON'T CALL ME A... [[ERROR 404]]!" Spamton squeaked in response, not wanting to repeat the new nickname. He didn't know what was going through that clown's mind, but he knew it was a grand finale. That look in Jevil's eyes said it all.

The look on Spamton's face read that the jig was up. With that, Jevil suddenly shifted his face downward towards the tummy before him, giggling a little before starting to ticklishly nom on the sensitive belly with those teefers of his! "OMNYomNYOMNOM~! I KNOWM YOUWH LOWVE WHEM SHAWM DIB DISH! OMNYOMMONCHCROMCHMOOMCH!" the devil teased playfully before bringing one claw down to tease a side while nomming away like a cat on a ball of yarn.

"AAAAHAHAHAHAHAEHAEHAEHAE! OHOHO [H E A V E N] IHIHIHI CAHAHAHAN'T! ICANTTAKEIT!" Spammy shrieked, shaking his head and pushing weakly at the little devil's shoulders. Tears of mirth were streaming down his rosy cheeks, and his glasses slid off his face and toppled to the side. He tossed his head back and curled forward over and over again, not knowing what to do. After 30 seconds or so, he broke.

"OHOHOHOKAAAAYEEEEHEEHEEHEE! Y 0U [[W1NNER]]! PLEEEHEEHEEHEEHEEEEE-SNORT-EEHEEHEASE! MEHEHERCYEEEEEHEEHEEE!"

As soon as the word was given, Jevil retracted his tail, and rose up from Spamton's tummy, letting the puppet recover from that final attack that left him breathless.

"AH... HAEHAE... HEHE... HEH... Ahhhh..." The puppet let the residual giggles bubble out of his throat while he breathed. He closed his eyes, feeling exhaustion take over. Spamton was waiting for Jevil to declare victory and kick him to the curb, back to his dumpster like the clown always did... But... He opened one of his eyes to see Jevil hovering with his legs crisscross, sitting on his tail, a genuine smile taking over his features.

"....SO?" The salesman asked, sitting up slightly to look the joker in the eye. 

"SO WHAT, WHAT?" the jester replied while leaning on two fists curiously.

"AREN'T YOU GOING TO [[dispose of any used needles!]]?"

Jevil's eyes widened in realization, before his face softened into an unnaturally gentle expression. 

"YOU CAN STAY HERE AS LONG AS YOU NEED, NEED! YOU DID JUST LAUGH YOUR STUFFING OUT AND ALL, "  Jevil explained, magically pulling a blanket out from behind his back and tossing it to Spamton, who caught it out of surprise. The salesman really didn't know what to think of all of this... The clown had never been nice to him like this. The other boss-darkner tended to be cold behind that mischievous, playful look in his eyes... He was that one step away from freedom, blocking his only escape to the real world.. HEAVEN. ... but never had Jevil acted like this before... It almost reminded him of a family he lost long ago.

The doll looked down at the blanket in his lap. Then up at the clown.

"I... um... thank you..." Spamton was shocked enough to lose the glitches that stole his speech for just a moment.  A sudden "POOF" from under his butt and a cushiony feeling alerted him to the cat bed he was now sitting in. He tried to take offense to that, but he couldn't. Instead he took the opportunity to get some sleep in a real bed...first time in a long time. He curled up, snuggled in the blanket. The salesman drifted off to sleep quickly, having not been this comfortable in so long.

Jevil hummed in content. He needed this. They both did. They were both being tortured endlessly by the game they lived in ... and them fighting all the time was tiring. In this moment they both realized how stupid it was, the endless fighting. They both understood what it was like to be thrown away, not only by society, but by the game itself. If anything they should be allies... No... friends.

Of all the things to make them see that... It was this particular fight. Jevil giggled at the prospect that something so silly may have just permanently changed how the two misfits saw each other.

And that was a wonderful thing.

[petricorah]

scenes i loved from Real Enough to Get Me Through by @marriedzukka <333 [ids in alt]

[laniidae-passerine]

positively obsessed with how Rockstar Lestat is the exact kind of guy one of my friends would show me a picture of and swear he’s really sexy and cool and brilliant. Whole time I’m thinking “oh dear GOD” staring at a trainwreck weirdo and wondering what’s happened to everybody else that is absolutely missing me. jesus christ he’s blond

[telebeast]

"His nephew stood with his back partially turned to him, a heavy, now-dented bat clenched in both hands. His shoulders were shaking with sobs, tears streaming down his reddened face that was twisted in what Ford could only describe as agony. His arms and knuckles were bloody, crimson dripping from fresh wounds and splattering on the grass at his feet, as he stood over the remains of the now obliterated tombstone statue of Bill."

I've been reading I Grow, Unforgiven (To Be Otherwise Is Madness) by @barbaricjester, and man it has been a fun fic to follow. I love it when a fic just feels so in tune with the source material, while still telling its own story! Anyway, I wanted to do an illustration of a particularly punchy scene a few chapters in... I encourage folks to check it out :) [ID in alt!]

[teddybeartoji]

o wait before i start posting any pics.. i was thinking that maybe.. you guys could help me liquify this gender some more by switching up what you call me.... DON'T GET ME WRONG I LOVE . LOVE LOVE LOVE WHEN YOU USE HE/HIM AND JUST OVERALL LIKE MORE MASC STUFF THAT'S SOOO MMMMMMMMMSO FUCKING GOOD like i don't get to feel that irl at all so it really does make me so happy but i've just been thinking abt TRYING to switch it up more yk? does this even make sense...... . hhhh anyway i might won't even like it and i'll want to just go back to hehim but i wanna try... JUST TO SWITCH IT UP.

[uncleardyn]

(alan wake-gravity falls crossover) man i love that character. you know, the deeply paranoid author who made a pact with a dark entity that ultimately ended with him stranded in another dimension separated from his loved ones for years at a time? takes place in the pacific northwest? has twin imagery associated with him and a reoccurring specific piece of symbology related to the unfortunate situation they're in? doesn't ever explain the reasoning behind his actions and instead just kinda goes "bro trust me"? yeah he also wears an outer layer of clothing with elbow pads on it, that one.

[diedbydeth]

rant about proshipping because it's 1 am and i can't sleep and i can't find a good fucking fanfiction website and i'm just so fucking sick of everything.

just to preface this i'm not an "anti". just anti-leaning. i'm shipcourse unaligned because i find this type of discourse really pointless and anger inducing. like why the fuck do i have to tell grown ass adults (i'm literally not joking there are people in their fucking forties believing this shit) that shipping a child and their dad is not ok. like what.

ok preface done. now the rant.

i find all of proshitters' takes on stuff really weird. like what do you mean fiction doesn't affect reality? if fiction doesn't affect really, then how the fuck did the january 6 riots happen? i can assure you that the reason they were there was not because there was actual election fraud. if fiction doesn't affect reality, then queer and racial representation in fiction doesn't matter. like people realize that, right? or am i just out of my mind? clearly you can understand how pedophilia and incest in fiction can affect people if you can understand how representation of minorities in fiction can affect people. there can't possibly be people that dense, right? even aside from children and minors reading that shit, pedophiles reading it can make them consider not getting help for their paraphilia and just jacking off to the porn you oh-so-graciously have given them. like does that not make you uncomfortable beyond words?

or their other argument saying that people shouldn't care what others ship? like am i overreacting to be incredibly uncomfortable around people who actively ship minors and adults? why do people even do that in the first place? don't give me that coping mechanism crap, there are *much* more better and efficient coping mechanisms than writing about pedophilia, like writing about the feelings you felt or talking about it with someone. i went through something very similar, but i didn't have to write pedophilic shit and post it on ao3, so why would you have to?

like you are harming people with this crap. you are giving predators something to hide behind. you are giving people who draw problematic things, not even related to weird ships (like people who draw racist and other bigoted things), something to hide behind. you are giving creeps a platform and ultimately helping them in getting their behavior normalized. do you not see the problem with this?

do i, a teenager, need to tell an adult, a person in their mid-forties, that condoning pedophilia and incest, even fictional, is problematic?

rant over. feel free to send death threats or try to tell me to support creeps in the replies or even my askbox. or don't. your choice.

[nerevar-quote-and-star]

Trying to transliterate Leara's name into Quenya, and it somehow becomes, uh,

Lëarra

Which basically means "You Sealion!"

And I'm just, "Oh yes, this is That Sealion Woman, and she can breathe fire, as all sealions do."

If Leara, for any reason at all, needed an actual Quenya or Sindarin name for any fun Elvish shenanigans, we'll just use Calairie/Calearil, which is "Light of the Sea" in Quenya and Sindarin, and what Leara actually means.

[nostalgia-tblr]

I watched Avengers: Age of Ultron (apart from I skipped some overly long action sequences) and I am not sure so can someone tell me whether or not Tony Stark was the baddy in that film? Because about halfway through I was sure he was but then it was maybe just an evil robot after all and I am confused because either this film was surprisingly subversive or it was about robots hitting each other.

[ren-doesthings]

the the the the the th

design and fic (racoons like bones) by @starbellbunny accidentally miscred the design BUT STILL LVOE UR WORK MAX WOO

[introspectivememories]

if you're writing a charles fic, it must have some aspect of boyking. he must lean a little on the childgod side. he has to be revered a little bit, adored even. if people aren't talking about him like they wouldn't wash his feet and adorn it with perfume like mary magdalene washed and adorned jesus' feet, you're doing it wrong.

[practicedvmm13fullofpotatoes]

At this point, I'm just projecting on to Janae 💀

This is basically what I thought when I was trying to find the ballpen that just. Disappeared. It was in the one place that was so fucking obvious but I didn't bother checking because it was too obvious

[mcybree]

man I wanna get in fh related fandom discourse but in like a quiet way where we all go around and directly share notes with one another. maybe a power point presentation is involved

[p2iimon]

drawing more furry fnaf art. yknow just to keep you posted. i love posting in the tags sorry these ones got away from me

[dbphantom]

maybe i should have gone into practical effects instead of computer science...

[perexcri]

His fingers tighten a little beneath Mike’s jaw, and he thinks of hazy afternoon daydreams in classrooms, sunlight drizzling over his desk to alight hope in his chest and an endless practice in imagery: what it would be like to let his fingers dance across this same stretch of skin, let each touch tease at something more until he’d finally have the courage to tilt Mike’s head back and let his lips press to that small notch right between the hinge of his jaw and his neck.

His fingers tighten, and when he shifts his thumb, he feels that humming pulse once more.

I’m here I’m here I’m here.

(based on the final scene of The End of Evangelion)