#NoooTCH

[cryptidsncurios]

The regular bullets didn’t particularly phase Xigbar---as a Nobody, some sorts of weaponry did not leave a particularly bothersome mark upon his inhuman person---but that Thundaga?

Xigbar jerked from the impact---then plummeted.

It was odd, unexpected, that abrupt disconnect from his gravitational disobedience, and the open air was greeted with a clipped gasp---not very extended, but erupting from so deep within his chest its surprise was apparent.

And hitting the ground was even more jarring than the initial shock itself. Ungraceful, rather embarrassing in the overall scheme of his combative performance. It didn’t necessarily hurt, to be fair---and thus, after a few moments of collecting himself, he was able to rise to his feet.

A few seconds of pause, then---

A laugh.

An actual, real laugh---head thrown back, without fronting his boastful confidence and lacking in the condescension of his ageless experience. His opposition was real---skilled, talented, truly capable of going against him without him holding back and pretending he was ripe for the defeat.

“This!” he pronounced the word from the pit of his empty chest, “---This is some damn fun! Ya got me this time, fella---ya actually, truly got me!”

Then, taking a moment to swipe the dust off of his coat, “Man oh man, I came into all this thinkin’ you were just gonna be another average joe lookin’ for a wimpy tussle---but, oof, was I fortunately wrong.”

Then, after a pointed crack of his neck, he gazed upon his opponent with a teasing bite of his lip, and nods of his head to express how utterly impressed he was.

“So, ya wanna see me goin’ for real? ‘Cuz I got no doubt that's what you're expectin'---and I actually wanna show such a cool dude what I really got to offer.”

Where his Sharpshooter would typically appear within both of his hands to resume battle---only a single palm rose.

A swirl of Eldritch sparkle surrounded that extended hand, Light and Darkness crackling and flashing into existence with a power beyond comprehension emanating: an ancient fury of the Worlds, combining into the form of a jagged blade, adorned with threatening metallic points of otherworldly origin, and, upon the very end of its length, an embedded eye of unsettling hue---ever-watching, all-knowing.

"C'mon, bro---" and he slashed the air, to rest the blade at his side, "I want you to gimme your best shot."

This was shaping up to be an... interesting evening.

With a click, he finished inserting bullets, ready once again for combat. An involuntary hiss snaked past his teeth when a stray laser exploded a part of his cower in splinters, cutting shallow into the exposed flesh of his arm. It seemed his enemy was firing blindly, unable to determine his exact location - however, the sheer amount of projectiles made even that a perfectly valid strategy.

No doubt just waiting for his onslaught to smoke the fellow gunslinger right out of his spot.

And then - oh? Had he ceased..?

The Black Wind waited, listening - crimson Orthrus at the ready, crosshairs of his eyes eager to once again lock onto their target. But for now, patience. The roars and howls of his summons raged in unison, and he focused deeply upon the connection to take Hati's sight.

Through the wolf's optics, he could see that their opponent had deftly dodged the lupine assault, perched in thin air in defiance of gravity itself. Almost like a Misterian, kin to the sky - and yet, where White Cloud floated so lightly, so weightlessly - the gunslinger robed in black pushed off invisible spaces, ran and leapt along some curves of reality that even the Gun Beast's eyes could not fathom.

Spatial magic. Advanced, very much so.

Another series of beams shot out like vicious downpour, this time targeting the Espers below. Rending the ground not unlike his own Valefor's Arbalest - some shots missing, some glancing, and then some striking the metallic beasts head-on, piercing the weaker segments of their armor. Pained whines and howls erupting out of mechanical creatures that, by every mortal's judgement, should not be able to feel such things.

But they did. And they fell, leaving only Sköll and Hati barely functional.

The Demon Gunman did not wait for the other when eldritch weaponry joined to form a mighty bow; Relinquishing Hati's glitching sight and focusing upon the Soil to whisk his form away and warp behind Xigbar with a flash of golden sand.

As black daggers fanned out and decimated the very spot he was hiding in just moments prior, the Black Wind seemed unable to resist paying the other back in kind.

A volley of bullets headed straight for the Nobody's back; An umbral cape lifting over the summoner's right side to reveal a fully primed, golden Magun. One azure bullet already pre-loaded into his heart's chamber.

What? He wasn't slacking back there.

BANG! It was not another summoning, there was hardly the time - but a powerful Thundaga spell, exploding in violent arcs of lightning that swallowed up the immediate area. He landed softly like a cat, a blazing gun in each hand.

"Boo." Came a completely unamused deadpan. Now they were momentarily even - momentarily, because he was very much planning on turning up the heat.

[weedstop]

bought more noootch

[m41z135h1pz-moved]

ohhh my god ooooohhh my god *thinks about starkid so hard*

[man-me--a-sand]

time to kiiick it uup a noootch

cause im eeevil and bad to the booone

[forthehonorofraeskull]

Starkid Moments That Are Stuck In My Head As I Start School Again

“blaaaack coffee, i’m your coffee girl-” “NOOOOO!!”

“it is time. tO DIEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!”

“AND WHEN YOU WAKE UP WITH MUD ON YOUR D*CK. AND YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW WHERE IT CAME FROOOOOOM!”

“A kick-line is inevitABLE!”

“why is everyone in the kingdom  W H I T E ? ?”

“I’M F*CKIN SEVENTEEEEEN!!!! At least, I was before you LEFT meEE”

“you could go next door and see something professional, we wouldn’t blame you a biiiiiiit, you’ll be sitting through this ore-SH*T.”

“I’ll reinvent the human race, and shove it in Jemilla’s face.”

“YOUR WAGON IS ON fIYAAAAH!” *cue Lauren dancing with the scarves*

“It’s enough to make me wish I were lonely and poor...but, like...with mOnEy.”

“nO EXIT FROM THIS BRRROADWAY VENUEEEEEEE!”

“I never had a pony...I never had pets..just a bullsh*t butler, who builds bullsh*t jets, UUH!”

“That’s completely fair, but in my defense, dude, your daughter’s HAWT.”

“Shuuut the f*ckk uuup!”

“What an a*s! What a b*tch! What a c*****ckkkk!”

“YOU’RE A SISSY, A TWAT, A GIRLL, I’M THE DARKEST OF LOOOORDS-”

“MOana...make way, make way...consider the COCONUTS...hohoho..consider it’s trees,, it gives us what we nee- uhh, and no one leaves...i didn’t like that movie..” “It’s the cirrrcle of liiife, and it-”

“They’ll remember ACHMEEEED!!” *cue kick-line*

“To Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, SLYTHERIN!!”

“BUSINESS CALLS, I’M UP TO MY A*S IN SH*T, *AGGRESSIVELY BOBS HEAD* WHAT IS THIS BUSINESS??”

“I love to kIcK iT uUuPp A nOoOtCh!!!”

“Didn't like, didn’t like, didn’t like-a-like ‘em, didn’t like, didn’t like, didn’t like-a-like ‘em, didn’t like, did not like, like-a-like ‘em-”

“Oregon, to Oregon, OR RE GON!! WE GONE!!”

“I have FALLEN, from UP HIGH, the world has said goodby-e, I’m not an ANGEL, not the ANSWER, I’m just go-ing nowhere fast-er.”

“the leeeaves fall from the treeees, (just as they wiiill) the skyyy is blueeee, the clooouds are whiiite, the staaars mooove acrosss the skyyyy, but in this tiiiime, we don’t know whyyyyy”

“With the press and the glamour, we’ll kill the reviews, spotlight on Mr. Ingenueee”

[graceandtheidiotsquad]

Hey-when I see a fun take, I say something-You got this! you just gotta KICK IT UP A NOOOTCH/lh/ref

my take that no one asked for

doesn’t contain yellow jacket spoilers!!!

wiley and hannah should be father and daughter not bc it would be healthy at all but because i think it would be funny as hell

image text under cutoff

Keep reading

[chewbaccan]

unethicalpandas replied to your post: MY GAME FUCKING FROZE AND THEN IT CRASHED...

That, children, is why you don’t buy sims 3 pets.

they need to fix the goddamn animals.

[weedstop]

with noootch on it

ate some popcorn