#No fooking way

[springs-hurts]

Reading The final Empire and man I'm tired of Vin's "noble aren't as bad" attitude just cause she's fallen in love with some noble Lord. Like yeah I get Sanderson doesn't write grimdark or smth but her thinking Dockson is exaggerating it... Yeah girl good for you it's fiction.

Staying here only for Kelsier and Sazed and dox and other crew members, not Vin and her teenage love life problems.

[linpunny]

*Taps dash*

Are you ready for more Dessy delulu?? No? WELL THATS TOO DAMN BAD

Thank you so so much to @akiisks for this new commission of me and my big ass pookie, my soulmate, my Kenneth b Anthony, giant ass boyfie Draken.

[jeonqkooks]

and so the yoongi brainrot persists

[wellthatsclever]

I miss when they used to put effort behind their false flag events. Now we have a cis transman (lol) shooting up the most famous "evangelical" church in America and they raid her stuff and find a Free Palestine Trump mask and an AR-15 with just the word PALESTINE written across it.

I miss when it wasn't this on the nose. You used to get events with maayyybe 1 or 2 lil easter eggs that you could present to a normie and go, "see? How do you explain this then?!"

[bisquitly]

Someone who can travel in time, please go back and hit that biatch who thought it is good idea to start study a field where you need human anatomy

(It's me, I'm the biatch)

[daisyblog]

English Love Affair

Our Story Masterlist Summary: YN plays ‘English Love Affair’ to see Harry’s reaction.

based on this request.

YN scrolled through her phone, trying to find a song to play from her Spotify to put on whilst she cleaned, recording herself to upload to her TikTok later on.

“Guys does anyone else need music on whilst they clean?”. She asked the silent audience, knowing that nobody could answer her. “I just love a sing and dance as I do it”.

As YN scrolled through her never ending playlists, her eyes lit up when she saw the popular 5sos song that was popular in the directioner world. “Fook off…how could I forget this song existed!”.

“It started on a weekend in May…I was looking for attention, needed intervention…Felt somebody looking at me…With a powder white complexion, feeling the connection”.

YN began to mouth along to the words knowing Harry would appear any minute to tell her to turn it off. “I’ll give Harry ten seconds before he appears”. YN continued to dance as she placed some dishes in the dish washer.

“The way she looked was so ridiculous…Every single step had me waiting for the next…Before I knew it, it was serious…Dragged me out the bar to the back seat of her car”.

“Turn it off!”. Harry voice echoed in the distance.

YN stopped her dancing as she placed a hand up to her mouth to stop her laugh from bursting out. “What did you say? Can’t hear you!”.

“When the lights go out, she's all I ever think about…The picture burning in my brain, kissing in the rain I can't forget, my English love affair…Today, I'm seven thousand miles away…The movie playing in my head of a king size bed means I can't forget…My English love affair”.

Harry appeared in view as he stood with an unamused look. His arms folded across his chest, the muscles of his biceps shouting out as they tensed.

YN rolled her lips inside her mouth, trying her hardest not to let out a hint of amusement as she looked at Harry’s harsh frown. But her internal battle failed her as she sang the next line.

“My English love affair”.

“Why are you listening to this song? There’s millions of other songs you could listen to…and you choose this fucking one!”. Harry voice was calm for someone who was clearly annoyed and irritated.

YN shrugged her shoulders as she gave Harry an innocent smile. “It’s a good song”.

“It’s about my sister…yah know…and yeah”. Harry tumbled over his words, not wanting to say what the song was about out loud. “Imagine having to listen to a song like that about your siblings”.

YN knew what Harry was trying to do, but she was one step ahead of him when it came to arguing the point. “Yeah…at least you know how Louis felt listening to Watermelon Sugar!”.

Harry opened and closed his mouth a few times trying to find a way to defend himself, but his lack of words failed him.

Wanting to push his reaction further, YN continued to sing along. “Gemma’s a queen for this one!”.

“YN!”.

Tag List:

@pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy @harrys-flower @platinumbarbie143 @frickin-bats@harrysbbyh0ney @chronicallybubbly @goldensunflowe-r  @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite@kaverichauhan @peterholland04 @panicattheuc @or-was-it-just-a-dream @hittiesontour@bunnyharold @fanfictioncafe @lilfreakjez @iamahallucinationnn @theekyliepage @indierockgirrl@buckybarnessimpp @ashleighsss @jerseygirlinca @fake-coolbeans @itsmytimetoodream@treehouse-mouse @mrs-anna-styles211994 @macy-tpwk @mrs-anna-styles211994

[zeondraws]

I have no idea what the fudge I did today, I died laughing oewhfoewjflewoijfoöwiejfewi

Why are there two of them???

Innes, stop crouching and HELP ME

INNES MY HEAD SHRUNK HELP ME!

I dinnae feel so good.... Caz

INNES LOOK, I BECAME RENNICK

Fooking Bastard, how do I put my makeup on naow???

Innes, listen. I did not eat the soup last night I swear. Roper set me up, he took the soup- He cannae behave this way, look, I'll get ma bagpipe, ye take my harmonica, we sneak into his room and play as loud as we can.

This old fud won't get away with it this time.

INNES SOMETHING HAPPENED TO ME.

I CAN SEE GIBBO FROM HERE

Innes, hey pssst Innes, guess what I did at 3AM

I did dumb stuff in the game today, together with this silly photomod. I laughed so hard when making Muir larger. Meanwhile someone else laid on the floor crying after seeing these @sgiansporran

[inthepeakymidwinter]

Cruel Summer (Thomas Shelby x Reader)

Summary: Y/N tries to move on after seeing Thomas with another woman. Thomas comes back after weeks wondering where Y/N went.

Based on this anon ask:

“Hello! Can you please do Tommy is jealous that Y/N is moving on after having a crush on him for years but he was too focused on Grace? He realizes that he loves Y/n more than Grace after seeing her with another man”

Word Count: 2718

TW: drinking, alcohol

(Sorry it took me sooo long! Hope you all enjoy!)

————————————

It’s been weeks since I slept after finding out that Tommy was with Grace. It shook my nervous system in ways I didn’t expect it to. I shouldn’t care as much as my heart actively does. I stopped going outside to water my plants. I stopped eating breakfast and lunch. The only thing I could hold down was tea. It took many days to feel like a person again. The night I caught them kissing at the derby my heart shattered into a thousand tiny pieces. I hadn’t seen Tommy since that day, and I swore to myself that I wouldn’t plan on it. I ran out of that stadium and never looked back.

Strangely enough as one door closed another began to open. Thomas’ brother John had knocked on the door to my townhome one early morning. I answered the door in my pajamas, with my hair messy and wild, sipping a cup of tea out of one hand. “John?” I asked him, looking ahead of him to see if anyone else was with him. He stood there with a perfectly dry-cleaned suit on and his hair slicked back.

“Have you seen Tommy around?” He questioned; his demeanor was so serious that it almost felt like an interrogation.

I turned furious in an instant. “You really think I’ve seen him? I haven’t been out in weeks. What makes you think he’d be with me?” I shouted.

“Aye come off it. I didn’t mean anything by it. Last time I saw he was off to the woods for some gypsy thing. No one's seen him since…are you okay Y/N?” John asked sincerely.

“I’ll be fine John” I mumbled, looking down at his shiny black leather shoes. I took another sip of tea before I felt John’s hand on my cheek, slowly lifting my head up with his thumb so out eyes would meet.

“I know yer not” He sighed. I shook my head slowly and he rushed himself through the door, making his way into my kitchen. “Y’know Y/N if i had known any better I would have come by sooner…just haven’t seen you around…i thought you’d be coming by the betting shop any day now” He admitted.

“John, I barely make it out of my bed most days what makes you think I’d even make it to the betting shop?” I hissed.

John smiled, then realized what i said and how severe it was. His demeanor changed into a melancholic look, and he walked over to me. “Don’t tell me that” he said with his lips trembling. “Why have you done this, Y/N what happened?” John questioned me.

I looked down at the floor and then back up at him. His brown eyes stared me down until something came out of my mouth. “I just…saw him with her” Tears started to form in my eyes.

“Oh, fook me Y/N, him? You have feelings for him?” John asked. “You deserve so much better than my sorry excuse of a brother. He may be my brother, but he has flaws Y/N. Flaws that you are nowhere near” He told the truth and I believed him for once. I always knew Tommy had big dark secrets. I just didn’t know how bad they were and maybe that was for the best. “We’re going out tonight. You and me, eh?” John insisted, holding my hand as he spoke. I smiled for the first time in a long time. I wasn’t ready but with John i felt like i could take a leap. “Put a nice dress on, I’ll pick you up at 8” John said and kissed my cheek. I blushed involuntarily as I watched him walk out of my townhome confidently. He always had this charisma about him, all of the Shelby brothers did. It was effortless to them.

At around 6:30pm I started getting ready. I put on winged black liner on my eyes, and slipped on a tight black dress with lace trim.

At exactly 8pm just like he said, John arrived in front of my house to pick me up. I decided to walk out of my home and saw John get out of the car immediately. He raced up to the passenger door and opened it for me. “You know I would’ve knocked on your door” He stated.

“I figured, but I was impatient” I smiled back at him.

“Well you look absolutely stunning tonight” John complimented. I nodded in his direction and tucked a piece of my hair behind my ear.

“So where are we going?” I asked him with a smile.

“You’ll see very soon” John stated and shut the door once i got in. He drove us to a bar that i had never been to. We went in and he got us drinks right away. I sat quietly in a booth with him as we giggled about old times and drank beer to our hearts content. After a few hours John cursed out of nowhere. “Fook me I forgot to pick up Arthur from the Garrison. Linda’s gonna have my arse” He groaned as he got up from the booth.

“I-It’s okay John I can go with you” I sighed. Maybe John was right. Maybe Tommy didn’t dare show his face in this town anymore.

John nodded at me and went up to the bartender to pay his tab, then we went back to his car and drove to the Garrison. John turned the car off and turned his attention to me. “Are ye sure you want to come in?” He asked politely.

“I’ll be fine John” I placed my hand on his and gave him a small smile. He held my hand for a minute in return before letting go and getting out of the car. He walked to the passenger side and opened my door, letting me get out before he slammed the door shut. We walked into the Garrison with our hands intertwined and John yelled out for Arthur. He was drunk off of his face, sitting at the bar and laughing with a random man I’ve never seen before. And by the looks of Johns confused face, neither did he.

“Alright Arthur come with us. Don’t wanna keep that Linda waiting do we” John spoke, trying to coax Arthur out of his drunken state.

Arthur looked at John and back to his drink then guzzled his entire glass of dark liquor in one go. “I’m waiting for Tommy. He said he’d be back” He slurred.

John groaned audibly, “Arthur, Y/N and I are taking you home. Tommy’s not coming he-“

“He what” Thomas spoke from the bar’s entrance. My stomach turned and I no longer felt happy from all those drinks like I did a minute ago.

Thomas and I exchanged quick glances before his gaze went back to his brothers. John stood in shock for a moment but it quickly faded to anger. “You don’t get to just leave us without an explanation Tom” He growled.

“I never left. Did I Arthur?” Thomas asked and walked up closer to the two brothers.

“Aye. He’s been out with his woman I reckon” Arthur raised his empty glass in support but Thomas grew furious.

“Never said anything like that you drunken bastard” Tommy growled.

“You didn’t have to” John huffed and walked towards me. He motioned to go out the door and i nodded my head in agreement, taking his hand once more.

“Where the hell are you two going?” Thomas roared from behind.

“We’re leaving for the night. You enjoy Arthur” John smiled before leaving the bar with me. I walked out of the garrison with John and felt myself crumbling. I walked the cobblestone street to get to his car and stopped.

“John…I need to go home” I croaked out.

“Y/N Please tonight was supposed to-“ He pleaded.

“John I need to go right now” I huffed, nearly running to the car at this point.

I made it to the car and opened the door myself, hopping in as fast as I could. John got in and slammed his driver side door, turning the car on angrily.

“I didn’t want this to happen” He sighed.

“What?” I asked grumpily.

“Just all of it. Fuckin Tom” He growled.

“Just take me home, John” I mumbled. Completely over seeing Thomas in person. I just wanted to climb into a hole and die.

The ride home was silent. Nothing but John’s breathing and cursing under his breath. It took us 15 minutes until I finally made it home. I made it home and rushed out of the car, slamming the door and storming into my townhouse after unlocking the door. I closed the door behind me and locked it, making sure no peaky ever got in.

I stepped into my kitchen and ran to the cupboard beside my refrigerator. I opened it and took out the bottle of red wine that had been sitting there for months. I went to fetch a bottle opened from the drawer beside it and heard a loud knock at the door.

“Leave me alone John” I shouted and proceeded to open the bottle of wine. I twisted the cork and it popped out of the bottle. Then yet again another knock. “I told you to leave me alone!” I yelled. I sighed deeply and got a wine glass out of my upper cabinets, pouring wine into my glass and taking a large swig.

Suddenly the knocks on my front door grew louder and i couldn’t take it anymore.

I cursed under my breath and stomped to the front door, unlocking it and about to curse out the person behind the door.

“I told you to leave me-“ I yelled until I saw who the person behind the door was. Thomas Shelby in the flesh.

“You can hate me all you want but do NOT get revenge by using my brothers” He argued with his baby blue eyes and perfectly styled dark hair.

“I wasn’t getting revenge anyone. It's something called moving on” I huffed and tried closing the door on him. Thomas held the door open and stared me down.

“Then why go out with John” He asked me with hurt in his eyes.

“It’s none of your business, Tom. Go home” I stated and tried to close the front door again, but it was no use.

“What the hell are you doing, Y/N?” Tommy asked angrily. I wanted to curse him out but instead I took a deep breath and stepped outside on the front stoop with him and shut the door behind me.

“Thomas I’m trying to move on. The same as you did weeks ago with that blonde girl. I’m tired of you being in my life” I huffed and nearly cried. Just a minute later rain started to pour onto us. I felt cold drops trickle down my shoulders and looked down at them sliding down my arms.

When suddenly Thomas asked me, “…Why don’t you want me in your life, Y/N” This time with a fallen face and broken-down demeanor.

Tears welled up in my eyes and I wasn’t prepared to tell him anything about what I saw those past weeks ago. “You need to go Thomas…I-I can’t handle this right now” I croaked and tried to pull myself together.

“I’m not going anywhere until you tell me what the fuck is going on” He raised his voice and stared at me deeply with his light blue eyes. The rain had trickled down his head by now, making his dark hair completely wet and straight. He looked good and it just pissed me off even more.

“I never kissed anyone in front of you! Never fucking liked…anyone other than you. And then you go off with other people disappearing for weeks” I cried out and avoided his gaze.

“I didn’t think you wanted me. You ignored me every time we all went drinking. That’s why I went for Grace, but she was using me. Trying to find our guns. Trying to end our company. That’s why I had to leave. I was off the grid” Thomas explained. I sighed and sat on my front steps. Not caring if the rain made me wetter, I just needed to think properly.

“I can't let you go Y/N. Not like this. Nothings started between us. I’ve never got to tell you how I felt” Thomas spoke from behind me.“Y/N look at me” He ordered. I turned to face him, and he stepped down a stair, sitting beside me with his body turned fully towards me.

“I rather die than hurt you. I wish I never did. I don’t want to lose you Y/N” Thomas confessed. I stared at him completely breathless, my hair dripping wet with rainwater. Thomas placed his hands on either side of my face. My eyes closed as I fell into his caress. “Please Y/N” He begged. I started to cry softly, and he wrapped me into his arms. Hugging me with an urgent tightness. I’ve never felt so comforted by anyone like that. “Tell me what you want…be honest, me or John” He gave me an ultimatum. My cheeks flushed a vibrant red color as I left his embrace and stared into his inviting gaze.

“You really don’t know who I like do you…” I asked him.

“I really don’t Y/N…you’re driving me insane right now. Waltzing in with him” He spoke with frustration.

“Me? Like you didn’t drive me to insanity weeks ago? You’ll be fine” I laughed in his face as the rain fully poured down onto us.

“I need you” He spoke, his voice much deeper than it was before.

“And I need a mental vacation but we don’t always get our way Thomas Shelby” I sighed and placed my hands on the stairs, holding myself up.

“Why are you doing this? You just figure when one person finally moves on that you can just come back, and everything would be normal again? You don’t understand how miserable I was because of you. John had to get me out of bed just to be a person again. And you think you can come over once and propose an ultimatum and make everything fine. I’m sick of it Thomas Shelby” I confessed with anger making my blood boil.

“Y/N…I’m sorry. For everything. I didnt know what happened to you. I didn’t even think you cared. No one told me where you went and i had to lay low. I wrote millions of letters i never got to send. I promise I will make everything up to you. Just tell me who you want the most” He pleaded and shuffled closer to me.

“It’s never been John…from the start you were the only person I wanted” I admitted. Getting near his familiar ocean blue eyes was enough for me to become lightheaded. He placed a hand on my wet cheek once more, staring back into my soul like he saw right through me. Rain drops trickled down his forehead making his jaw look even more chiseled.

He carefully placed his thumb on my bottom lip and swiped over it softly. “I’d really like it if you were all mine…permanently” Thomas growled.

“I’ve only been waiting for months” I mumbled out before he leaned in close and kissed me roughly like he yearned for this moment for centuries. The rain came down so hard i couldn’t think straight. I kissed him back. Tasting a mix of my own salty tears and rain water diluting them. I locked my lips against Thomas’ with him repeating back the same way. We shared sloppy, compelling kisses that didn’t stop until we both had to come up for air. When we did, Thomas pressed his forehead against mine and closed his eyes.

“I’ve wanted you for so long Y/N” He breathed.

“Me too.” I smiled. “Let’s go get warmed up. I have wine waiting inside” I offered.

“Sounds like a dream” Thomas spoke and stood up off of the stairs, grabbing my hand and pulling me up in one go. The night ended with us lying in bed without clothes, overly drunk and tangled in the sheets. His big arms holding me tight as we drifted off into a good night’s sleep.

[darthannie]

day twenty-three: knife play with thomas shelby 

pairing: Thomas Shelby x f!reader word count: 608 warnings: knife, little blood, fingering a/n: First fic back, yay! Would Tommy probably have a gun instead? Probably but just go with me on this one. kinktober masterlist

Breaking into Thomas Shelby’s house was easier than you thought. Though, it was more like an estate than a house. Well aren’t I lucky, you thought. You got inside and snuck through the house, struggling to find his office in the dark. You were to get in, get out, and get far away from there. 

You scoured the halls, not making a single sound. Intuition told you to check the door to your left. You turned the nob and it opened quietly. You stood in the door frame, triumphant. Right as you moved, an arm snaked around your waist and you felt something cold on your neck. 

“It’s not polite to show up to someone’s house unannounced,” whispered Tommy. 

“Thomas Shelby, what a pleasure it is to finally meet you.” He pressed the metal on your skin, not enough to cause an abrasion, but enough for you to feel the threat of cool metal on your warm skin. Your breath hitched as his body pressed against yours, making you shiver. 

He kept his voice low, “Now you’re going to tell me who sent you. And I will let you go.”

“I cannot give you that information, Mr. Shelby,” you whispered.

“I’m not going to take it by force, but I supposed I’ll just have to fuck it out of you instead.” Before you could question him he forced you over to his desk, removing the knife from your neck to clear off part of the desk. You hinged at the waist as he bent you over the desk. You looked back at him.

“Say the word, and I’ll stop. Otherwise, this might not be enjoyable. What’ll it be?”

“Fuck me, Mr. Shelby,” you said biting your lip. He lifted your dress and slipped the blade underneath your various undergarments and cut through them with ease. Once bare, he dragged the knife along your ass, teasing you with the blade. 

You could have sworn he cut you. You reached back and felt around. When you checked your hand there was a smudged bit of blood on your fingertips.

“Mr. Shelby, I believe you drew blood.”

“I believe I did.” His fingers found their way to your entrance. He felt as your wet hole took him in. He moved slowly as he prepped you. Satified with how wet you were, he laid the flat against your pussy. 

“Are you ready to tell me who sent you?” His fingers curled inside you and your back arched. 

“No, Mr. Shelby. I think you’re going to have to try harder.” 

He removed the knife and you felt him line himself up and thrust in you, hard. He started thrusting and pulling you up by the neck, your body now right up against his. He moved his hand to your waist. The previously forgotten knife found its way back to your neck. Tommy turned the edge away from you, careful not to accidentally slit your throat. Even still, the fact that there was even a chance he could cut you was thrilling. Your moans filled the room as his pace evened out. The items on the desk trembled. 

“By the end of the night, you will give me the information I need or I will put this blade to good use.” He tried to sound threatening, but a bit of play came out in his voice. The blade found its way to the side of your right thigh, moving up slowly. You grabbed onto the edge of the desk, needing to hold onto something as a chill ran down your spine. 

Breathlessly, you quipped back, “I’d quite like to see you try, Mr. Shelby.”

Taglist:

@devotedlyshadowytheorist, @dxnger-dxys, @tommyshelbywhore, @quinnlilias,@madnessandobsession, @mvpr-moon, @nela-cutie, @faebirdie, @charmed-asylum, @anasanthology, @ilikefictionalmen, @akanne-aka, @no-fooking-fighting,@queenofstresss, @flwrs4aust, @mrkdvidal1989, @00hsv, @laylasbunbunny

[sleepymaus]

What the ACTUAL fuck. this is what i found this morning. something ATE it's fucking body and left just it's head and some kinda spine thing. ravaged the dandelion that got munched to shit too and there's no way that was the lil caterpillar.

never fucking mind :((((

i found a tiiiny caterpillar in my garden btw.. if u even care

[kittievampire]

So long/odd request but hear me out

Mc and Lucifer are in a sugar-rotting relationship and brothers and undatebles react

Lucifer spoils Mc so much like…mammon gets in trouble he gets hung from the ceiling Mc does the same thing they get away scot-free Satan has been begging for a cat for eons nope! but Mc wants one of course. He gets them tons of expensive gifts and if Mc ever wants something they only have to bat their eyes at him. It's not like Mc is using him though they dot on him a bunch too. And whenever they get in a fight loud moans are followed within a few minutes (if you know what I mean) but feel free to ignore 💙

I was in the middle of class when I read this and I was WHEEZING

I am a firm believer in Lucifer spoiling the MC rotten and leaving his brothers to fend for them damn selves but denying any sort of favoritism

I only did the brothers this time, I hope that's okay 😭😭😭

Sorry this took so fooking long to make 🥲

Lemme see what I have in my bag, my dear~

Click here if you wanna request!

Warnings: Very suggestive, jealous bros lmao L

Enjoy.

You and Lucifer had been dating for a few months now. Though, one would think you'd just gotten together with the way the two of you treated eachother. Or maybe that you were newlyweds in your honeymoon phase.

Lucifer treated you like a goddess. There was constant praise and worship, he'd drop everything if you asked, and he'd spoil you rotten with his love. You would return the favor, of course. Every now and then you'd surprise him with a new cursed vinyl, which he'd listen to all night if not spending it with you.

However, the brothers believe that you're getting totally unfair treatment.

Mammon

Baby boy was spending a lot more money than usual

He was playing a new gambling game he'd downloaded on his D.D.D.

When Lucifer got home, he immediately scolded the second-born for a solid 45 minutes

He announced that Mammon was on "lock-down" and wasn't allowed to ask anything of anyone, nor was he allowed to spend money

He was hung from the ceiling

And Goldie was taken away, too

Mammon was pissed the fuck off

So, when he noticed you were spending a lot more money, he did tease you for being greedy

"Oi, human, ain't splurgin' on shopping supposed to be mine and Asmo's thing? Lucifer's gonna be on yer ass if ya spend too much. Just be careful."

He says this and is genuinely a little worried that he'd see you hung from the ceiling as well

Lucifer confronts you about it in front of Mammon

"My Love, may I know why you've been spending so much grimm recently?"

First off, Mammon didn't like how he started that

How come you got that sweet conversation starter?

What he got was, "Mammon, what have you been wasting your money on this time?!"

Though, he still suspected it'd go downhill, and that he'd need to jump in to protect you at some point

"Oh, just some things... I can't tell you what they are, but I promise this is a rare occasion, Luci." You said, gifting him a kiss on his cheek

Lucifer smiled at you. "Alright, as long as you're being responsible, I trust you."

...

WHAT?!

"WHAT?!" Mammon shouted, earning a slight jolt from you and a look of annoyance from Lucifer

"What, Mammon?"

The Avatar of Greed froze. "I-I-! Y-You—" He paused before letting out a small groan

"Nevermind. Forget about it, yeah?"

Leviathan

Snekboi missed roughly a week of school and wasn't attending his online classes

He was grinding this new game he got so he could keep his spot as one of the top players!

He just couldn't afford to take his attention off of his D.D.D. for a second, the price would be too high!

Of course, Levi ended up being scolded by Lucifer

"Your priority must be your studies, Levi, do you intend on dragging Diavolo's name through the mud?"

How Diavolo was relevant was beyond him

But, Levi still had to sit through a lecture

He also got his D.D.D. taken away from him for a week

Not only did he lose top-spot, but he lost a majority of his self-esteem as well

So, he was obviously worried when you started skipping as well

"Uhh, MC, I'm not sure you should stay home today. Lucifer's not too kind to those who slack off."

But, his warnings fell upon deaf ears

You decided to take a few days off, deciding that you just really didn't feel like going to RAD

You woke up with a migraine one day, couldn't get sufficient sleep the other, and you just took another day to catch up on sleep and what work you had

Leviathan actually tried to stop Lucifer when he saw him outside of your room

"Lucifer, maybe they were feeling really bad or something, I don't think punishing them is a good idea, please show mercy! They're just a human!"

"Quit your whining, Levi. Or do you want to be given the Mammon treatment?"

This made Levi yelp and cower behind him, watching as Lucifer knocked on your door

You answered it, and Leviathan bit his nails nervously

"Hey, Luci," You said, greeting him with a small kiss to the cheek

"My Love," He started softly. "Are you feeling alright? You haven't been attending your classes. Is something wrong?" He asked, a hand reaching up to caress your cheek.

Error 404 not found

Leviathan.exe has stopped working

You smile sweetly. "I'm okay, Lucifer, I just really wasn't feeling up for RAD these past couple of days. It's nothing to worry about, promise!" You say, quite enthusiastically.

...

NANI THE FUCK?!

Levi SWORE you were about to get bodied

But, no

Lucifer just smiled, chuckled softly, and left with an "Alright, take care of yourself, Love."

Bullshit

You're fucking hacking

Satan

Satan wanted to bring a cat into the HoL

Lucifer reminded him of how he brought more cats than were allowed and "turned the House of Lamentation into the House of Cats"

Very fucking salty about it, but ultimately got over it (for the most part)

He saw you bring a little feline home and immediately rushed to your side to help you take care of it

It was a stray with a few wounds from other cats

He helped you bandage it and feed it, all the goods

"MC, I must warn you that Lucifer isn't exactly fond of pets... Let alone cats," Satan said, stern gaze meeting yours

You tilted your head in confusion. "Why is that?"

Satan was a bit hesitant to tell you, so he gave you the shortened and sweet version

"We had a bit of a cat problem a while back, he just really doesn't like cats. Dog people, am I right?" He scoffed

"Satan, what did I say about bringing in cats?"

Satan lowkey jumped a bit and turned his head

The fuck did he come from, bro is teleporting or some shit

You immediately hold the kitty close to your arms, looking up at Lucifer with doe eyes

"Luci, I'm sorry! I was the one who took in the cat, but he was hurt! Please, can we just keep it for a little while, at the very least?" You begged, the black cat in your arms meowing at Lucifer

Satan sighed. He was about to tell you that it was no use, that Lucifer couldn't be bought or reasoned with on this topic. That may have been his fault and he was sorry, but there was absolutely no way Lucifer would budge on this-

"Fine."

...

...

Um

What

Satan sat there dumbfoundedly before the two of you as you continued to converse, trying to process the events that had just taken place

Lucifer said yes

To you

For a cat?

Huh...

He was upset for a mere moment, but then a light bulb went off in his mind

Perhaps he could use this to an advantage

Satan's definitely going to try and get you to be a wild card whenever him and Belphie are pulling pranks on Lucifer

Just so the eldest will be a little more lenient

Now he knew Lucifer's weakspot

He found himself laughing maniacally in his mind as he realized just how much him and Belphegor could do with you as a cushion whenever they'd get in trouble

Asmodeus

"But, Lucifer, all of products in my favorite cosmetic brand are going on sale today! I have to get every single one of them or else I'll be..." Asmodeus gasped

"Trashy!!" He cried out, practically leeching off of Lucifer's arm as he continued to beg

"Asmodeus, no! You and Mammon are both on lockdown for the rest of the month! Now, get off of me!"

Lucifer managed to pry his younger brother off of him and slammed ether door shut to his office, leaving a near-on sobbing Asmodeus in the library

That's when he heard you

"Lucifer, must you always be so rough on your siblings?" He heard you ask, making him gasp and sigh dreamily. "Oh, darling, you always come to my rescue when I need it!" He said, his voice not loud enough to penetrate the door

"MC, I suggest staying out of my family matters. They have nothing to do with you."

Asmodeus could tell from the other side of the door that an argument was likely about to ensue

However, when the two of you started raising your voices, he could also sense some... Arousal?

"Oh!"

"Oh."

It wasn't long before he could hear your moans and whimpers from the other side of the door, lewd slapping noises making him step back a bit

Asmodeus couldn't help but giggle a little

He honestly didn't mind this as much as his brothers did, he found it really entertaining that the two of you endulged in his sin after such a heated argument

Asmodeus approves 👍💖

Beelzebub

Poor baby gets scolded so often for raiding the fridge, especially late at night

He's usually told to go to bed, and that these late-night trips to the fridge aren't good for him, all that

He couldn't help it, it was his sin! That was no fair!

Lucifer ended up putting him on lockdown after 11pm, meaning no trips outside of his room whatsoever

Beelzebub would usually try to get some snacks into his room before that time, but he usually ran out rather quickly and was left with a rumbling stomach

That's when you came in, holding two arm-fulls of snacks

Quietly, you pushed the door closed with your foot

You knew Belphegor was a heavy sleeper, but you still wanted to be quiet anyway, so as not to wake the Avatar of Sloth

You saw the gluttonous ginger perk up when he saw you

"MC?"

You smiled, dropping down the snacks before him

"Lucifer didn't say I couldn't raid the kitchen. I figured you'd be hungry, so I got you some snacks."

Bro bear-hugs you

He lowkey almost breaks your spine with how tight he holds you

"Thank you, MC! Can I call you sister, please? Get married to him quick so I can call you sister!"

You blushed at this comment, chuckling softly

"I'm working on it, I guess," You choked playfully, patting his back

"Beel, I need to breathe."

Not really all too jealous

A bit sad, but he gets over it when you bring him food

Lucifer never says anything about it tho when he finds out you're the one who's causing such a snack shortage

Belphegor

He was constantly scolded for pulling all kinds of pranks on Lucifer

There was that time he threw his D.D.D. in the trash, lit his coat on fire

All harmless things

So, when he catches you attaching a can of whipped cream to... Something in the fridge, he immediately raises a brow at you

"Hey, what are you doing?"

"Ahhh, just setting up a little surprise," You chuckled out

At first, he thinks it's for Beelzebub, but Asmodeus had taken him shopping with him earlier with the promise of free food afterward

"For..." Belphie trailed off, hearing footsteps nearing the kitchen

Immediately you close the fridge and take your seat in front of a plate of food you'd made yourself earlier. "Sit down," You whispered to the Avatar of Sloth

As he shuffled to a seat next to you, he realized what you were up to and put a hand over his mouth

Lucifer walked into the kitchen, greeting you and the youngest with a smile and a "Good morning."

You picked up a piece of the pancakes in front of you with a fork, putting it in your mouth and humming to yourself. "Luci? Could you pass me the butter?" You asked softly

Lucifer nodded, turning and opening the fridge

Immediately, whipped cream sprayed all over his face, some falling onto his chest

Belphegor bursted into a fit of laughter, immediately giving you a high-five and wiping a tear from his eye as he clutched his stomach

"Oh, that was good!" He choked out in between laughs

Lucifer turned to look at the youngest, wiping off a large portion of the whipped cream on his face

"Belphegor, did you do this?"

You snickered beside him, looking up at Lucifer

"I thought you'd like a snack, Luci~" You hummed out, giggling softly

Belphegor mentally prepared himself for a 45 minute lecture

There was a pause, making him shift a bit in his seat as his laughter died down

Suddenly, Lucifer began to laugh

It started out small

Then, his laughter boomed in the room, bouncing off of the walls

"Huh,"

This confused the fuck out of Belphie

Like, ummmm what

"You've gotten me, MC, well done. I needed that laugh." He said, walking over to you and wiping some whipped cream off of him, putting it on your nose

He dismissed himself, saying he was going to wash this off of him

Belphegor was silent for a moment

"Hm?"

"You get laughter and boops after pranks and I get lectures and scoldings... Favoritism at it's finest. The Anti-Lucifer League could make use of this."

He'd explain more, but he was getting too sleepy

Shit was fun asf to write, thanks for requesting

I hope you enjoyed this, anon!

[jeonqkooks]

a little taste | jjk

the one with the stress-relieving lollipop.

[ ‘ a little taste ’ series masterpost ]

pairing: jungkook x f!reader

rating: 18+ (minors dni)

genre/warnings: established relationship, basically pwp!, but a lil fluffy i guess, oral seggs (m. receiving), face fooking, 0.1 second of dirty talk?, what else what else hmmmm oH it's unedited as heck lol

word count: 1.6k

note: nobody look at me after i post smut please i'm just gonna leave this here and dip ⛷ but fr time flies wtf?? it took me almost a year to post the second part of this series what have i been doing lmao. buuuuuuut yeah yk this series is for the horndawgs sOoOoOo have fun lol

— as always, i’d appreciate any thoughts or comments you may have, and please drop a like and/or reblog if you enjoy reading ♡

You could tell that something was wrong the minute Jungkook walked through the door. 

From the way the door was shut a little too harshly, the sound of his keys hitting the ceramic bowl in your entryway a little too loudly. The way he came up from behind as you were cooking but his arms held you a little too tightly, like he just needed you to ground him.

He was off all throughout dinner, trying (and failing) to come up with proper responses to your attempts at making conversation.

Even now, as you snuggle up against him on the couch, you can feel the tension radiating off him. He presses absentminded kisses into your hair every now and then, but his arm around you is stiff, his jaw is perpetually clenched, his breathing a little too even like he’s trying to control it. At this point, you’re pretty sure that neither of you is really watching the TV.

“Alright, that’s it,” you say, pushing yourself away from his body to get a good look at his face. “Out with it, what’s wrong?”

Jungkook peers at you, clearly having been broken out of his train of thought. He exhales once, then pulls you back into his side. This time, he keeps you there.

“Nothing’s wrong,” he says, fingers drumming rigidly on your hips. “Just had a shitty day at work. Don’t worry about it.”

You frown slightly, trying to wiggle out of his grip but his strong arm pins you to his body. He squeezes your hips, as if telling you to hold still.

“Wanna talk about it?” you ask.

“No,” he answers, voice somewhat strained. You know he’s just simmering in there, thoughts racing, anxiety spiking.

He tends to keep things to himself because he doesn’t want to bother you with his troubles. But he’s your partner, that’s what he’s supposed to do - talk to you, let it out, work together.

When you huff out a breath, he placates you with, “Maybe in the morning.”

You’re not entirely pleased that he’s shutting you out, but this is just how he is. There’s not much you can do; Jungkook isn’t a talk-about-your-feelings kind of person. Once you remind yourself that he’ll open up when he wants to, you press a comforting kiss to his jaw in response, and he hums in appreciation.

You stay like that for a while, with the TV serving as background noise. You slip your hand under his shirt to trace odd patterns on his abs, like you often do whenever you’re cuddled up against him like this.

It’s innocent, until he does the same to you.

You’re sure he doesn’t mean to start anything, but when his fingers touch your bare skin, you have an instant lightbulb moment.

He kneads your skin like you’re a human stress ball, then loosens his grip when he remembers that you’re not.

Your hand stills on his abdomen. Lightbulb, for sure.

“Want me to make you feel better?” you ask, peeking up at him through your lashes with faux innocence.

Jungkook glances down at you, suspicious. “How?”

“Well…” Your fingers pick up where they left off, tracing his abs for a moment before they trail downward to toy with the waistband of his sweatpants. “You know how.”

He rolls his eyes at you, but his legs unconsciously (or not) spread a little wider. “I’m not even hard,” he says, even as he sinks further into the cushions of the couch, getting into position.

“I think I can fix that,” you mumble, inching closer to his face until your mouths meet. You feel him melting into the kiss, letting you take over him instead of the stress. When his tongue slips into your mouth, your hand palms him through the material of both his sweats and boxers. He rolls his hips against your hand, seeking friction as he gives you a muffled groan. You can still faintly taste the beer he had earlier after dinner. You don’t even like beer, but you love Jungkook.

“Fuck.” He throws his head back, eyes closed, bottom lip held hostage by his teeth. You lean closer to his neck, press a few kisses to the skin you find there while your hand rubs him until he hardens.

It doesn’t take very long before he grows bigger and heavier under your fingers. “Fine,” he rasps out, urging down to the carpeted floor on your knees. “I suppose you may suck my dick.”

You give him a particularly hard squeeze just for that, making him choke on a breath. “You’re not cute,” you say. He only gives you a grin in response before he lifts up his hips to help you shimmy his trousers and boxer down. He doesn’t even bother taking them off properly, just lets them pool around his ankles while he waits for you. His cock stands tall and proud, desperately begging to be touched. All because of you. All for you.

You spit into your hand, then wrap your fingers around him, slowly pumping him until precum leaks from his tip. His hips buck into your grip, silently demanding more. Impatiently, he weaves his fingers into your hair and gently guides your head to where he needs you the most.

“Y/N, c’mon, do something,” Jungkook groans, brows knitted together as he looks down at you. “Isn’t this supposed to be about me?”

“You’re right,” you say with a chuckle. “You’re right. I’m sorry.”

You give the tip of his cock a kiss to emphasize your apology before you take him into your mouth, sinking down on him on your first go until he hits the back of your throat. The airy, needy moan that he lets out sounds nothing less than heavenly to your ears. If he doesn’t want to talk about his troubles, then this might as well be the next best thing.

You pull back after holding him there for a few seconds, only to start bobbing up and down his length that’s now slick with your spit, drawing continuous moans from his mouth. It boosts your ego a bit, knowing how good you’re making this gorgeous man feel.

“God, fuck,” Jungkook drawls, as his hand in your hand tightens. “Baby, can I?”

You try to give him a nod as best as you can, what with his cock shoved into your mouth like this. You look up to find him already gazing at you with that fucked out look on his face. He holds your head still, then slowly bucks his hips into your mouth experimentally so you don’t choke on it.

Although, he does want you to choke on it.

Maybe you kinda want to choke on it too.

“Let me know if it’s too much,” he says, voice rough with desire. He’s always so attractive like this, when he sounds like he wants nothing more than to completely ruin you, absolutely delectable yet somehow, still your wonderfully caring Jungkook. Your core clenches painfully around nothing as he thrusts into your mouth, not breaking eye contact even once.

You feel tears pricking every time his cock nudges its way down your throat, until your eyes are all glassy and eventually your cheeks are stained with two clear lines streaming down.

Profanities tumble from his mouth clumsily, breathlessly, that you don’t catch most of what he’s saying.

“Baby,” he keens, and that’s when you notice that his lashes are wet too. Something swells within your chest that’s akin to pride. You could laugh if you weren’t so… preoccupied. Leave it to the both of you to cry during a blowjob.

At one point, it does get a little too much, right when he was almost there. You could tell from the way his stomach clenches and his balls tighten, his teeth digging into his bottom lip in concentration. You have to hold onto his wrist and tap his bare thigh so he could ease up on you. He untangles his fingers from your hair instantly, mumbling an apology while he catches his breath. You pull away from him to inhale deeply and let your throat relax for a minute, but your hand reaches for his length again while your mouth is temporarily out of commission.

He continues to shallowly thrust into your hand as you jerk him off, determined to make him fall right over the edge of pure bliss. Even when he’s about 0.5 second away from blowing his load, Jungkook is still mindful of you. He reaches down to wipe the tears from your face, a touch which you immediately lean into gratefully.

“Fuck, I-I’m gonna come,” he grunts out when you gather more spit from your mouth to add onto his already slickened cock, making it even messier, but easier for you amp up your speed.

“Where do you want it?” you ask, thoroughly enjoying the pleasure etched on his face and the sounds you’re pulling from you.

“M-mouth,” he manages to say. “In your mouth, please.”

At that, you wrap your lips around him again. As your fingers move up and down his length, alternating between fast pumps and harder squeezes, you suck on just the tip like he’s your own Jungkook-flavored lollipop. You hum in appreciation at the taste, eager for what he has to give you.

Your name falls from his lips over and over again, like a mantra, like a cry, until he’s painting your mouth with warmth, overwhelming your tastebuds with your favorite flavor of him. You keep up with your movements until you’re sure that you’ve milked every single drop from him. When you release him from your mouth, he grabs your face and kisses you deeply. He moans, muffled against you, when he finds the residual taste of himself on your tongue.

“Love you,” you tell him, bumping your nose against his.. “Feel better now?”

“Much better,” he says, albeit a little hoarsely after the… vocal training he just received. He grins at you lazily, clearly spent and visibly more relaxed than before. “Love you too, my dream girl.”

— all rights reserved © jeonqkooks. reposting, translating and/or modifying is not permitted by any means. [posted april 2, 2023]

[scytheaudio]

Round 2!

Same rule but with your characters. Magic is allowed, along with one weapon of choice. No tapping out.

Which of the boys is coming out alive?

I think Demon hunter would immediately walk out of the ring just because he has more important things to do than fight a bunch of guys.

aaaaah you know, I've been racking my brain about this since you asked 🤣

There's soooo many factors to consider...but if you ran the lads through an automatic fight predictor thingy ma jiggy then Atrocity would probably win most times.

Dark would have the most destructive magic and would reduce most to waste...but characters like Atrocity and Abomination can rabid heal and come back for another go...Dark is brittle as fook in physical confrontation, so if they get a claw on him...hes bollocksed.

Hunter (non god form), Blaine, Cole, Sylus, White, Creed, Marcus would all be lethal all round fighters but probably wouldnt come out on top against the true monsters in the group (Maverick, Feral Alpha, Atroc etc)

Void Hunter is disqualified because his power is literally "DELETE!...DONE"

Alpha would be lethal as himself, but in feral Alpha form he'd stand a good chance at winning...it hasnt happened yet, but he's like the Hulk (non butchered by recent marvel films) and gets bigger/stronger the more angry he gets WITH CLAWS N TEETH but he may just go insane and destroy everything around him which other characters could work their way around if tactical.

We've seen what Maverick can do...we wont talk of original body Maverick since he hasnt happened in my stories...just jayjay maverick, and as we see...there are the likes of Atrocity who match him but dont have limits. Maverick is limited by Jayjays limits and relies on fear and misery to fuel him.

Dominic with Rot merged with him would have a good shout since she can blocked most attacks and then attack with soul sucking tendrils and zombies and Dom has a Huuuuge hammer...but some characters such as Dark and Advocates magic could probably find a way to deal with this...and the bruisers like Atroc, Kairon, Abomination would most likely be able to smash their way through his defences.

Advocate would win on many occasions since he can jump through times and space and rip ya soul out....but as stated in the xmas special years back...characters such as Bomo and Atroc may not have a "soul" in a way that we imagine and may be able to close the distance before he could.

OG Kairon would take down most, but would ultimately lose to some of the biggest boys in the game.

In the end...its hard to say....many would snatch a win under certain undercircumstances....Atrocity/Advocate/Bomo/Alpha would probably snatch victory most the time. Void Hunter would win if allowed to play.

But well all know one thing

They'd all fall easily to THE MIGHTY THERIAN

For he is the floofiest...and the woofiest

[natelia-aldelliz]

Ghost gifts a single tiny ear loop to Soap one day. Says he noticed Soap had pierced ears. That rings keep from handling a gun or a knife properly. He doesn't make eye contact, tries to hide his face, even as he's already wearing his balaclava.

Soap blinks. Ghost has already given him gifts and only behaved that way for the very first one. He doesn't understand. The earring is very simple, but seems to be made of expensive material and not only covered with a thin leaf of gold.

"Didnae it come with another one?" he says, jokingly.

But Ghost flushes, turns his head, and lifts his mask, only enough for Soap to see the glinting of the other earring on his ear. Suddenly he understands that it's not simply a gift. Ghost favoured practicality, but he wanted to give him a ring.

He grabs his hand as it falls back down.

"Simon, what is this?" he asks softly, not daring to be hopeful just yet.

With his other hand, he reaches out to gently turn Simon's head back towards him. His cheeks and his nose are flushed, it makes the warmth of his dark eyes, generally hidden behind a sneer or a bored expression, undeniable.

He looks nervous. Johnny's heart is beating faster. Could it really be...?

"I know", Simon starts then pauses, uncertain. "I know I'm probably not what you thought you'd have, when you were younger" Soap wants to interrupt, to scoff, to protest that Simon is way better than anyone he could have hoped for, but doesn't. He never wants to cut off his love when he's barely starting to open up.

"I know that I'm not easy to be with some days, that I'm not friendly and easy going like you, like someone you'd deserved to be with." he continues, unconsciously pushing his face more into Soap's hand. "But... I love you, more than I thought I could, and I'd like... I'd like to be with you, for as long as you'd have me..."

Johnny's heart is soaring. He has no idea how to react. He'd have to get all the giddiness out first, and the moment doesn't seem appropriate for jumping around and squealing.

"Officially," Simon continues, voice quieter, out of breath. "If you want to."

A gigantic grin splits Johnny's face. All of his limbs are buzzing, he needs to stand up, to run, to explode something. But he's terrified to spook Simon so instead he just squeezes the hand he's holding rhythmically and moves his feet back and forth.

"Baby, are ye asking me tae marry ye?" Johnny says. He's pretty sure his voice is wobbly, but can't really hear it himself as the blood in his ears is louder than the rest.

Simon's eyes do something, what is visible of his face looks like he has an expression on but Johnny can't analyze it now, doesn't dare to see the hope in his eyes, the pleading in his brows.

"I... Yes, I guess I am," the love of his life says finally. "If you want to. You don't have to."

Soap can't keep himself in check any longer. He's making a high pitched noise, jumping up and down where he's seating on the bed, and throws himself at Simon.

"Of course ah fooking want tae!!!"

Simon lets out an excited giggle, swept in Johnny's mood, and tightens his arms around his lover. No, his fiancé.

This is the best day of his life. He just has to deal with this mission tomorrow, and then they can start to plan everything.

[amidst-wonderland]

SCOTS / GLASWEGIAN LEXICON

sometimes i forget i'm not my own little echo chamber and that a lot of people's only experience with scots is an unfortunately translated new years song, scottish twitter memes and one of the many animated characters that never seem to be voiced by actual scots (other than brave, scrooge mcduck, cait sith and soap). so, after a particularly nasty comment on archive this time last year (complaining about too much scots when it's explicitly tagged, for shame!) thought i'd make a wee lexicon of general phrases that appear in my fics but general rule of thumb, scots is phonetic so if it looks a lot like a word in english, chances are it is. however, it is a language and there are rules to its spelling so you can't just throw letters and sounds at a wall and see what sticks.

this isn't an exhaustive list, it's just what i could think of in terms of what i use and write in daily-life.

this can also be used for fanfics generally, so feel free to use if you're writing for a character like soap or drop me a dm, always happy to help! also, after having some ptsd with the "scottish pokémon fem!c" i want to make it abundantly clear we don't say "fook."

ae - of / one of an exmaple is 'ah, never ate two ae anything." meaning, "i never ate two of anything." (and for the scottish folk reading this, et tu, isa. - currently have it on whilst i'm writing this).

aff - off

ah'll / ah'm - i will / i am ('ah' just means 'i')

ain - own, as in 'my own car / hoose / dog'

alba - scotland

an'aw - as well

auld - old, like "auld lang syne"

aw'a an tak yir face fir a shite - go away, you're full of / taking shite

aw'richt - alright

awa' an bile yir heid - fuck off. literally telling them to go and boil their head

blether - chatting

cannae / canny - can't

cauld - cold

chancer - chancing your arm, being sly and trying to get one over on someone / getting a leg up

crabbit - irritable

deid - dead

dae - do

didnae - did not

dug - can mean dug a hole, but also dog.

fae each ae yi's - from each of yous

feart - scared

fur / fir - for

gallus - bold

gardyloo - look out below because i'm flinging my piss and shit out of the window because i've nae indoor plumbing. this is also were the term 'shitfaced' comes from because scots coming back from the pub, drunk wouldn't hear it and end up literally shitfaced.

glesga - glasgow

greetin' - crying

guising - trick or treating

haud - hold

haund / haun - hand

hen - girl (term of endearment)

here, you! - a ruder way of saying "oi", also use "haul, you!" again, to quote one of television's finest, "here you!" / "naw, here you's no in the day, can ah help you?" 'haul' is like stop and is generally a bit more threatening than 'here' (can also use, haud, as in “haud oan a minute.”

how - depending on context this usually means 'why'. so someone might say, "how no?" meaning, "why not?" again, you don’t ponder why you demand, how.

jist - just

lit - like

loch - lake

lumber - a hook-up, also a “winch” / “pull”

maw - mum

mebbe - maybe

merrit - married

messages - shopping

mony a mickle maks a muckle - if you look after the pennies, the pounds look after themselves

naw - no

nicht - night

no - again, context depending, no can mean "not". when nora says, "ah'll no dae this with a drink in me." she means, "i'm not having this conversation after having a drink."

oan - on

oot - out

patter - banter

peely-wally - pale, ill

piece - sandwich, so a piece'n'ham

pished - you can literally pish yourself or you're incredibly drunk

pit - put

polis - police

scunnered - nauseated or disgusted due to overindulgence

setterday - saturday

skelping / skelp / skelped - a swift slap

sleekit - sly

sling yer hook - piss off

snout - not sure if this is scottish but chances are if you don’t smoke you won’t know and i don’t think it’s common in england as my little cousin and all her mate who smoke don’t know it but a lot of them roll and don’t smoke straights.

tattie - potato

telt - told

the big hoose - prison, though it's meant to be a specific one in glasgow called barlinnie where basically anyone who's committed a crime in glasgow ends up and it's grim. a lot of glaswegian's grow up with threats of being sent to "the big hoose."

toaty - tiny

wae - with

weans / wains / wee-yins / bairns - children

wee - small

wheesht - shut up

wit - what

wit ye fir? - what are you having

wumman / wummin - woman / women

yir / yer - your / you're

[donutwatches]

MHA 2.13 - Time to Pick Some Names - part 2

Because I didn’t have enough character names to remember already. Let’s add a dozen new names to remember. Ha. 

I do not know what I was expecting, but it was not this, lol. I love our french disco dancing queen. He said, I’m not going to have a measly hero name, I am going to have a FULL sentence!

Oh man, I wish Midnight would let her keep the Alien Queen name. That is way more fitting than Pinky. She should at least have a name connected to acid. Pinky is a lazy name. Like, she’s pink, big whoop. 

Who is Crimson? I guess this is a pro that our Kirishima looks up to. Red Riot might be my favorite out of the kids hero names. 

Kaminari is the last character I would expect to drop a Hemingway reference. Even though the joke about him is always that he is brainless, isn’t this proof that he has some smarts? 

Wow, Earphone never lets him breath, huh. Such school girl crush behavior. 

I am guessing that he wants distance from the Todoroki name because of his butthole father. I like it! Simple, but it feels like he is being himself. 

THIS IS THE CUTEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN. I WILL NEVER RECOVER.

I feel like we already got that Deku would be Midoriya’s hero name since season 1, but it still feels like a full circle moment. I love the idea of him taking a name that was an insult and flipping it into something uplifting. 

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Why is he like this? I swear. It is great that he changed it from “King” to “Lord” as if the issue with the name was the status title and not, you know, the murder part. 

Hmmm, so this mysterious mustard yellow cloaked man is All Might’s teacher. I hope he is a better teacher than All Might because Deku needs some help. 

Nooooooooooooo! So ominous! It is wrong to see Iida with vengeance in his eyes like this. Talk to your friends! Please don’t go out on your own and get your self hurt! I just know nothing good can come out of this. Nerd rage should never be fooked with! 

Click here for episode 14

Click here for the master list.