#NiceHair | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

artiststarme · 2 years ago

Text

No Steves Allowed!

Okay guys, I decided to the DnD one first today but I'll probably end up posting the parent fic today too. I've never actually played DnD so if this doesn't make sense, let me know! I hope you guys like it and please leave your thoughts in the comments.

~*~*~*~

Eddie wasn’t a big fan of rules, or setting boundaries, or partaking in any form of mass conformity. When he made his DnD club, he wanted it to be a safe space for all the outsiders and outcasts to relax and enjoy their high school years. (And join his DnD campaigns so he could torture them but that was neither here nor there). However, there was one rule that was non-negotiable and grounds for immediate character damage and death.

There was to be no mention of Steve Harrington.

It didn’t matter if he was your partner in chemistry for a project or if you were complaining about his crony bumping into you in the hall, no one was allowed to mention him by name or otherwise as soon as Eddie stepped into the drama room. This confused the original Hellfire members as well as their successors but everyone conceded eventually. Especially when mentions of Steve brought about the painful and horrific deaths of their characters.

Gareth, the little shit that he is, tempted the rule the most, even still. Even after all of the characters he’s lost (one named Stephen that was beheaded by a griffin carrying a blade from a fallen half-elf soldier and several others that tried to work the name ‘Steve’ into a background story), he still liked to poke the bear at least once a campaign.

“Galahad, it’s your play. What course of action will you take to persuade the innkeeper into allowing you and your friends a place of slumber for the night?” Eddie asked him, his voice firm and powerful as he enveloped his Dungeon Master persona.

He already regretted giving him the chance to speak after he saw a slow smirk spread across his face. “Well, dear Dungeon Master, I think I’m going to go back to the bar and collect my friend Stephen Nicehair. Then I’ll use his looks and luscious locks to seduce the innkeeper into giving us beds.”

Eddie could feel his left eye twitching in annoyance. ‘Stephen Nicehair’? That’s the best Gareth could do?

“As you turn around to go back to the bar, you hear the innkeeper release a battle cry. He drops the pillows in his hands to reveal a cursed dagger with an obsidian blade. The previously friendly man plunges the dagger into your chest without hesitation and twists it in your heart to deliver maximum pain. Roll damage.”

Gareth sighed but rolled his dice, “six.”

“As the life fades out of your eyes, the innkeeper leans in closer to your face and whispers, ‘no one tries to outsmart me in my inn’. You die just as you lived… Pathetically. Galahad the Bad is now dead, existing on the floor of the inn in a pool of blood with the dagger still protruding from his rib cage. Your party is now cursed by the Goddess of Death because your blood was spilled on the cursed obsidian blade. ‘Til next time, boys.”

The entire Party was silent for a moment in shock until Dustin loudly erupted. “What the hell was that?! The innkeeper? Eddie, he’s an NPC that was supposed to offer us shelter after saving the town, what the fuck?”

Jeff shook his head at him and patted Dustin’s shoulder, “hey man, Eddie really doesn’t like it when people break his rules. It’s better not to question the consequences.”

“What rules?” He turned to Eddie to point an accusing finger at him. “You said that you hated rules because they forced conformity onto people outside the mold. And all he did was say he was going to get his friend Stephen to help!”

Eddie’s eyes flashed dangerously as he leaned in closer to Dustin. “Roll for initiative and persuasion.”

“Eddie-”

“Roll Henderson!” He screamed.

Dustin sighed brattily but rolled the dice as directed, “fourteen for initiative and ten for persuasion with my modifier.”

Eddie grinned at him maniacally. “Elric steps up to the innkeeper to try and appease him of his anger only for the man to pull another dagger from his cloak and slice it across Elric’s neck. You can feel the warmth of the blood spill down your front and feel some of the traitorous liquid bubble into your mouth and through your lips. You can’t breathe and can only gurgle a single question. What do you ask?”

“I ask him why he killed me!” Dustin said, a mixture of alarm, shock, and outrage in his voice.

Eddie leaned in close to him, the evil glint in his eye still fully present and terrifying. He switches his cadence to match the hoarse voice of the innkeeper and says, “‘You can’t speak of Stephen or any of his aliases and stay in the world of the living.’ Elric falls to the ground and bleeds out all over the floor. The innkeeper steps over your useless body and says to your Party, ‘It’s a no to the shelter, take the bodies of your compatriots and leave or face the same fate.’”

Mike looks pissed and Lucas looks shocked at the turn this relatively happy session took. Meanwhile, Jeff and Grant were busy alternating their glares between Gareth and Eddie. Dustin just looked flabbergasted that his bard was murdered so callously by what he thought would be an innocent NPC.

“Alright, let’s pause there for now and we’ll pick it up next week. Some of you have new characters to make. Also, as a reminder to the senior members and a precaution for the new members, there will be absolutely no mention of Steve Harrington. Thank you, you’re adjourned.” Eddie spoke and waved them off.

“What? But Steve-”

“I said adjourned, Henderson!” And from that moment on, Steve wasn’t mentioned at Hellfire. The kids slipped up here and there, especially given their hero worship of the guy but no one said his name aloud again in fear of losing another character. But then Eddie experienced the Spring Break from hell, found out that Steve Harrington was actually a pretty good guy, and started dating him.

The rule posed a problem once Eddie was finally able to talk Steve into joining a one-shot campaign. It took months of dating and illicit promises to get Steve to make a character, honorably named Steeb Munsington, and sit down with all of Hellfire to play.

“So how’s this supposed to work? Are we just ignoring Steeb the entire campaign?” Lucas asked him.

“What why? Why are you ignoring me? Did I do something?” Steve looked adorably alarmed and glanced concernedly between Lucas and Eddie.

Lucas patted his hand from his seat next to him. “Eddie has a rule about bringing you up during a session. If we mention you, our character gets serious hit points. No offense man, but I’m not taking that chance.”

Steve turned to Eddie with a hurt look. Oh shit, he had to fix this quick.

“Obviously it’s void now! Obviously guys, shut up.” He turned to Steve. “Don’t worry Stevie, that was a joke.”

“Oh was it a joke when you murdered Elric the Bard for questioning Galahad’s unfair demise?!”

“Henderson, shut your mouth right now or you can kiss Kalston the Killer goodbye right now.” When he opened his mouth to argue, Eddie cut him off again. “The rule is clearly void now! I only had the rule in the first place so you guys wouldn’t be able to tease me about my crush on Steve. Now we’re dating so it’s fine. The rule has been discredited, no more capital punishment for mentioning his name.”

“You’re dating?!” Dustin screamed in shock. Eddie sent a panicked glance at Steve who was glaring at him with his arms crossed over his chest. He wouldn’t be getting any help from him.

“You’re gay?” Mike muttered in bafflement. Wow, nothing got past that kid.

“You murdered eleven of my characters because of a crush?” Gareth shrieked, his face turning red in anger.

Will stared at the two of them in shock while the rest of the Party raised their voices in uproar. He was completely frozen while insults and accusations were thrown, thankfully more due to the fact that Eddie had gone on a rampage as DM rather than them being gay. How were they not focusing on the gay comment?

“Not just a crush anymore, he’s been my boyfriend for months! And if you had stopped violating my rule, they wouldn’t have died! Anyways, let’s let bygones be bygones and move along with our campaign. We only have eight hours to get this done today before the sheep have curfew.” Eddie clapped his hands and grinned.

Jeff shook his head at him and Grant muttered angrily under his breath. Gareth, though, exploded. “You murdered a shit ton of my characters for even saying words that sounded like Steve! And now you just want us to move along because you’re dating the guy now! Congratulations by the way, we all noticed you seemed happier lately. Steve, if you hurt him, I’ll kill you like he killed all of my characters for even saying your name. What the fuck, Eddie?!”

“Jesus Christ, it was a long time ago! If you drop this, I’ll give everyone extra XP to start, okay? Double.” Gareth was still glaring at him. “Triple.”

“Fine but deep down, I’m still pissed off.” Gareth muttered.

“Noted, now let’s start. Stevie, I can help you out if you need it. Steeb is going to do great, I’m sure. I’m not above torturing my friends when it comes to you, okay?”

“Eddie!” Everyone besides him and Steve yelled. Ah yes, this was going to be a good gameday indeed.

Permanent tag list: @doubleb11 @nburkhardt @zerokrox-blog @newtstabber @i-less-than-three-you @carlyv @pyrohonk @straight4joekeery @trippypancakes @conversesweetheart @estrellami-1 @suddenlyinlove @yikes-a-bee @swimmingbirdrunningrock @perseus-notjackson @anaibis @merricatty @maya-custodios-dionach @grtwdsmwhr @manda-panda-monium @lumoschild @goodolefashionedloverboi @mentallyundone @awkwardgravity1

#Steve does end up playing but he would much rather just watch from behind Eddie's screen #Dustin can't believe they told him they were dating like that #Steve is pissed at Eddie for outing them at first but forgives him once he brings him lunch and flowers to Family Video the next day #Robin doesn't forgive so easily #stranger things #steddie #fanfic #steve harrington #eddie munson #gareth emerson #jeff #grant #dustin henderson #mike wheeler #lucas sinclair

286 notes · View notes