#Never Full: A Tale of Adventure Curiosity and Hunger Without Ending

[who-do-i-know-this-man]

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*Never Full: A Tale of Adventure Curiosity and Hunger Without Ending

[novelconcepts]

Greetings Novel. I was wondering, would you ever consider writing a vampire and/or werewolf Damie version? There’s already such a strong emotional connection whenever those stories are told, and I think you would just enhance that because you have such a knack for relaying Dani and Jamie’s thoughts and feelings. Anyway, just an idea because I love those tales and you’re absolutely one of my favorite authors. 😊

It’s the quiet she likes best, she thinks. The quiet, the dark, the simplicity. No one asks anything of her anymore. No one makes demands. She belongs to no one at all these days, for the first time since she can remember.

Except the Lady. She’ll always belong to her. 

But there’s a give to these things as well as a take, and Dani Clayton sometimes thinks it’s worth it. Worth it, not to have to sit at dinner parties and elegant balls. Worth it, not to have to titter and engage in small talk. Worth it, not to have to wear the ring.

Worth it, to leave him behind. 

And if it’s all shadow, all lonely, all deep-rooted ache she can never seem to soothe, that’s fine enough. She belongs to no one. No one except the Lady, and the Lady asks so little of her. Only to carry the curse--the disease--the hunger. Only to feed the shade coiled around the remnants of her old self. Only to wake. To walk. To drink. 

It’s dramatic, she thinks, but a little theater never hurt anyone. She makes sure of that much. It’s sustainable, so long as she keeps walking, walking, walking in the quiet. The dark. The simplicity.

It’s sustainable, until she reaches the village.

***

The pub is nearly empty. Too late, or too cold, or too poor an economic situation for carousing to be the game--Dani doesn’t much care which is the real reason. She likes the emptiness of the tables, chairs pushed patiently into place, every surface as clean as it is old. She likes the warm lighting, the oak bar, the smooth wooden floorboards under her boots. 

The mirror, she does not care for, turning her head swiftly away so as not to see the void where a young woman ought to stand. This part, she has never grown used to. This part, even after carrying the Lady--the Lady’s curse, more like, to hunger and need and wallow in lonely anger--for decades. She barely remembers, now, what that woman looks like. Blonde hair. Pale skin. Paler now than it had been in life, but only by so much--her mother had held such strong opinions as to what women should do with their time, and lounging in the sun had never been part of the pageant. Polite society, Danielle, has no use for a lady like that. 

Like what? she’d always wondered, never quite daring to ask. Adventurous? Athletic? Interesting?

No matter. The past is long, long dead--deader even than she could imagine back then, dreaming of being someone else. Someone free. All of them are gone now: her mother, with her antiquated ideas; her mother’s friends, who peered down their noses at Dani and smiled without heart; even Edmund. Even him. 

Long dead, now. Old age, or unrepentant illness, or freak accident--she doesn’t know. She wasn't there. 

The woman she was is dead, too, Danielle Clayton buried in a grave she’d only hauled herself back out of the next night. The Lady had whispered in her ear, granted unexpected strength, unexpected fury. Danielle went in. Dani came back out again. No one ever needs to remember. 

And no one ever has. She’s been walking for--fifty years, now? More, maybe. The date on the newspaper crumpled on one table reads June 24, 1987. More than fifty years gone in a blink, and Dani is still here. Washed clean, maybe, of all the bits that had once made up a patient, kind, hopeful young teacher. But here all the same. 

She settles at the table, drawing a book from her bag. The night is still young, the hunger not yet pricking at her patience. It’s good to start smooth, start simple, to remind the Lady that the curse might have its needs, but it is Dani who is still in control. Dani, who, despite making a decision unwary of its consequences so long ago, has managed to hang on this long.

Still here. Still walking. Still--

“Get you something?”

Her head snaps up, her body primed to run. An old instinct. As if anyone could touch her without consent now.

The woman watching her looks curious, but only faintly so, as if by old habit. Her hair is tied off her face with a bandana, her sleeves cuffed at the elbows. There is a loveliness about her Dani has always fostered a weakness for--a loveliness that matches, in a less primal way, that of the Lady who had come to her in that dream so long ago. Walk with me. Walk with me, and you’ll never be alone again. 

She shakes her head, smiles. “I’m fine, thank you.”

“Right,” says the woman slowly. “Only, this isn’t a library. Don’t order something, Tom’ll have me throw you out.”

She speaks like she doesn’t much care one way or another, but Dani has been around long enough to read between the lines of a person. The words are callous, but the inflection is specific--the emphasis placed not on throw you out as a threat, but Tom’ll have me. An apology before an offense. The woman glances toward the window, aware of the wind battering the glass, her expression calmly letting Dani know I’d rather not have to. 

“I’ll have whatever’s your favorite,” Dani says. Eyebrows raise, the woman’s head tilting. 

“Mine?”

“Sure.” Dani smiles, reaches across, touches the woman’s hand lightly where it rests on the table. It’s easier, influencing human minds through touch. She doesn’t like doing it at all, if she can help it--there’s a film over the idea, a nasty oily sense of wrong--but sometimes it can’t be helped. People who look at her the way this woman is looking tend to become a problem.

People who smile at her the way this woman is beginning to smile, lips quirking up at the corners like she doesn’t quite mean to, tend to become a danger to themselves and others. 

Mostly themselves.

The woman disappears briefly behind the bar; Dani, aware of the mirror, doesn’t watch her go. Her eyes remain on her book, her fingers tracing mindless sigils into the table until a glass is set gently down before her. A thin amber ale of some kind--Dani feels no curiosity, no interest at all. She smiles. 

“Thank you.”

“Sure,” the woman says. Hesitates, as though wanting to say more. Shakes her head. The fog--the sense of forget Dani brings in her wake--is already sinking its claws into this woman, already wiping Dani away. Good. It’s best when they don’t see her, don’t take an interest, don’t remember when she’s gone.

Especially women who smile like this one. 

She leaves the drink untouched, putting away two chapters in easy silence. Money, she drops on the table. No one looks up as she strides back out into the dark. 

Tonight’s meal will be found elsewhere.

***

The story should end here, she knows--a person like Dani is only still here because she’s long-since learned the art of keep moving. The Lady commands it. The Lady is impatient to walk. 

The hunger, pushing in along her ribs, pulsing under her wrists, is impatient for more. 

She ought to leave the little village be. There’s not much here to begin with, and it’s dangerous to feed in places where one single thread can be followed to each house in turn. Dani’s careful not to hurt where she doesn’t have to, not to kill ever--a little time, a little tender care, is all it takes to prevent it. She hasn’t left a body behind in almost thirty years. There’s really no excuse for making a kill where one could simply leave a vacant few minutes of memory, she thinks. 

Not that humans recognize the kindness for what it is. Not that she can blame them for their fear. She was afraid once, too--waiting, always, for the Lady to become Beast, for her to rise up over Dani’s good sense and turn her into something hateful. Dying, for Dani, hadn’t been the hard part. The idea of becoming something she isn’t...

But it’s been years and years, and she is still here. Still Dani. Lonely, and quiet, and living the simplest life she can manage, given the circumstances.

And back at this same pub again.

Shouldn’t, she thinks--knows, though she’s pushing the door open and striding back to that same table again. Out comes the book. Her eyes remain resolutely clear of the bar, of the mirror, of any patrons who might give her trouble. 

“Back again?”

The woman, this time in a t-shirt, her curls loose around her face. Same woman. Same smile. Same problem. 

Dani really knows better. 

“Noticed you didn’t touch the ale,” the woman points out, leaning her hip against the table. There’s a quiet confidence to the way she holds herself, a constrained line of motion that says she’s in no hurry. Dani watches her, smiling a little, and thinks, Shouldn’t be here. 

“No, I,” she begins to reply. Her smile fades to a frown. “Wait. Noticed.”

“Yeah,” the woman says. “And you overpaid. Drinks much pricier in America, then?”

Dani wouldn’t know. Dani hasn’t set foot in America since the sixties. 

“I guess,” she says, still puzzled. This woman shouldn’t be speaking of last night as though it was--well. Only last night. This woman shouldn’t remember Dani at all. The Lady’s influence generally makes certain of that. 

All these years, it’s never failed her. 

That is the idea.

“Something darker tonight, maybe?” the woman goes on, watching Dani with shrewd eyes. “A stout?”

“Okay,” Dani agrees, knowing full well she won’t touch it when the drink comes, and finding herself quite unable to say no. Quite unable to do what she should, which is to slip out before the woman can return to this table and smile at her again.

Try harder, she tells herself, when the glass is standing proudly beside her book, laid face-down on the table. Try harder to do it. Because, the thing is, if this woman remembers her--if this woman keeps remembering her--she’s bound to find herself on the other side of a beheading. A torch. A particularly sharp slat of wood. 

Her hand brushes the woman’s again, her fingers tingling. The skin is soft, the nails short; when she turns the woman’s hand over in her own, she finds callouses on the pads of her fingers. 

“Bold,” the woman says, amused--but there’s a flare of something more in her eyes, matching her smile too well. Dani swallows. Presses forward with her own mind, gently caressing the woman’s intentions. Forget me, she wills. I was never here. 

“Enjoy,” the woman says, the clear focus in her eyes drifting to hazy confusion. 

Dani watches her go, her chest tight with an unfamiliar sensation--something like hunger, and yet...

No one, she thinks, has ever remembered her when she’d wanted them to forget. No one since the Lady’s curse. Even Edmund, who had dreamed of a big wedding, a big house, a big family since they were children, had forgotten her, in the end. Easily. She’d willed it, and walked away, and he had forgotten she’d ever climbed out of that grave. 

This woman, whose name is not Dani’s to know, whose life is not Dani’s to touch, remembered. 

Even as she’s leaving, even as she’s slipping out into the dark to find someone to dull the Lady’s hunger, Dani knows she’ll be back again. A terrible idea. A terrible test of the universe’s machinations. And yet.

She can’t erase the curiosity, bent behind a shop with a young woman’s wrist pulsing warm against her lips. She can’t erase the way the woman had smiled at her with knowing amusement, as her teeth sharpen and the Lady takes what she needs. She can’t forget, as copper runs sweet across her tongue, and the girl sitting on the pavement heaves a languid sigh beneath her. 

It’s an awful idea. Truly, the worst. 

She has to know.

***

“Starting to think you don’t actually drink.”

The woman actually sits this time, sprawling into the chair across from Dani as though belonging there all along. Dani bites down on a smile.

“Why else would I come to a place like this?”

“The company?” the woman suggests, and though her tone is idle, her smile scorches. Dani shakes her head, laughing. 

She can’t remember the last time she laughed. 

“I’m not supposed to be here,” she confides. The woman raises her eyebrows. 

“Where are you supposed to be?”

Alone, Dani thinks. Forgotten, Dani thinks. That was the deal, Dani thinks, the price of a young woman’s freedom. Wake. Walk. Feed. There has never needed to be anything else. 

“Not here,” she settles on saying--a truth without teeth. The woman nods slowly, leaning across the table, her hand sliding over pocked wood to brush Dani’s wrist. 

“Doesn’t seem to be stopping you. Twice is an accident. Three is a habit.”

She isn’t wrong. Two people in this village bear Dani’s mark now, the inner slope of their wrists stained with new scars they won’t be able to explain. She’ll have to drink from a third tonight, and the odds of getting out unscathed--even with the fog clearing her from their minds the minute she walks away--shrink yet again. This isn’t a good idea. 

But this woman, impossibly, illogically, remembers her. Forgot, maybe, briefly--in the time it took Dani to pay and leave--and then the memory just...sprang back into place. Dani has made mistakes with women before, has let their smiles grace her heart in ways she was never meant to allow, but it’s never resulted in this. 

“I’m Jamie,” the woman says, and Dani almost recoils--almost says, Don’t tell me that, don’t put that on me, you’re not supposed to remember--but I won’t be able to forget. 

“Dani,” she says instead, and feels the Lady pulse deep in the place she’s always imagined her soul to rest. The Lady, a curse--a gift--a structure around which she’s built her second chance at life. The Lady, who looks upon Jamie now and sends a powerful swell of hunger up through Dani’s bones. 

Take her. Take her. She wants it, look at her. 

Jamie does, Dani senses, want something. Something that has no need for Dani’s influence, no requirement for Dani pulling the strings. Jamie wants something from her--something honest, something human--and the very idea of it spikes fresh terror like she hasn’t felt in decades.

“This is a bad idea,” she says in a low voice. “It’s dangerous.”

Jamie, fingers tracing Dani’s palm, searching out her lifeline, shrugs. “Always is. Doesn’t mean it isn’t worth it.”

***

There’s a place upstairs, a little flat. Jamie leads the way as though she’s done this a hundred times, taking Dani’s hand with an almost nonchalant gesture. 

“If you let me in,” Dani says, “this gets so much more complicated.”

“I’ll take the chance,” Jamie says. She should be laughing as she says it, a flirtatious bit of banter designed to delight, but she isn’t. She’s looking at Dani, her free hand turning the key, like she already understands. 

“I’m not,” Dani says. Stops. Sighs. “I’m not what you’re--what you think I--”

“Start here,” Jamie says, and pushes open the door. An invitation without words, one Dani can’t resist leaning into. She hasn’t let herself accept an invitation like this in so long. 

Take her, the Lady breathes. Take her, bring her to me. Dani squeezes her hands into fists, the familiar rage of hunger grinding against this new, too-human variant. Jamie is closing the door, kicking off her shoes, smiling. 

The smile is what really breaks her. The smile, which is a little teasing, a little tempting, but mostly just real. 

She’s kissing Jamie before she can stop herself, and even as she’s doing it, there is something too warm about it. Something too good about the way Jamie catches her, hands digging into Dani’s hair, lips parting when Dani brushes against her with the tip of her tongue. For all the skin she’s tasted, all the times she’s kissed and licked and bitten, this is different. This is--

This has no path. No road to follow to the end. No lie baked into the heart of it. Every woman she’s ever led into the dark, every time she’s ever drank deep and pulled back before the Lady can win back control, seems to fall away in comparison to how desperately she’s kissing Jamie. This person she barely knows. This woman who slips a hand around her hip like an anchor. This woman whose kiss is confident, who is smiling into her, who leans back breathlessly and says, “You’re sure about this?”

“Don’t ask me that,” Dani breathes, kissing her again. Jamie makes a soft groaning sound, tilting her head away. 

“Why not?”

“Because,” Dani says, unable to stop herself from kissing around every word, “I shouldn’t be here.”

“Shouldn’t, or don’t want to be?” Jamie is backing her against the wall, and Dani can hear her heartbeat, can’t seem to erase the dizzy scent of life pouring off of her in waves. Blood, yes, thrumming beneath her skin, but also breath, and desire, and something giddy and nameless that can only be joy. 

Such a human thing, joy. Why, then, does Dani feel it pressing in on her, too?

“Hey.” Jamie has stopped kissing her, is simply holding her face gently between her hands. Her thumbs have found Dani’s cheekbones, are pressing so lightly, Dani closes her eyes to keep from crumbling. 

“Hey.”

“If you really don’t feel good about this, we don’t have to. We can, I dunno. Talk. Or not. Whatever you want.”

Dani breathes slowly, all the little measures of human in a body that is not. She likes breathing, she’s found. Likes willing her heart to beat. Likes feeling warm, likes feeling as though any sunrise might be welcome, someday. Someday, when all of this fades. 

Like it ever can. Like the Lady would ever allow it. That wasn’t the deal.

“There are things,” she says hollowly, “you don’t know.”

“All the things,” Jamie agrees comfortably. “Everything except your name and what you don’t like to drink.”

Despite herself, Dani laughs again. She leans forward until her forehead presses Jamie’s, until Jamie’s breath coasting lightly across her lips is the only thing she can feel. 

The only thing outside of the beating, raging, desperate hunger.

“You wouldn’t believe me,” she says. “I--sometimes even I think I’m crazy.” And, really, might she be? Might this all be some delusion, some shattering of sense that has led her to believe there will be no woman waiting for her in the mirror? Or, worse, a delusion leading her to believe she is here--that she is still Dani, despite it all?

“Tell me anyway,” Jamie says, and Dani kisses her again. Kisses the edges of her lips, the curve of her jaw, the length of her neck. Kisses the place where the pulse beats like fists against a casket lid, her lips parting, her tongue flat against the salt of Jamie’s skin. She hears Jamie draw a sharp breath, one hand tight in her hair, hears Jamie say, “Yes” in a tone Dani has to fight to deny.

She doesn’t mean it. She can’t mean it. She doesn’t know. 

And Dani, though the Lady roars with that unrelenting need, can’t take. Not like this. Not here. This woman remembers her. This woman will remember tomorrow, even if Dani slips out of her bed, even if Dani never shows her face again. She’ll remember. It will, somehow, unfairly, haunt the rest of her life. 

“It’s a long story,” she says, face still buried in Jamie’s neck. Her hips are twitching against Jamie’s thigh, her hands sliding under Jamie’s shirt. “A long, crazy story.”

“I have time,” Jamie says. Dani lifts her head. Smiles. 

It’s not supposed to be like this. It’s meant to be quiet. Dark. Simple.

Lonely. 

That was the deal.

“The teacher,” she says quietly, closing her eyes as she scrounges for the beginning for the first time in over fifty years, “was, by choice, a solitary young woman...”

Jamie listens.

[wiseabsol]

20 Mewtwo Fanfics Recs

Since I’ve been getting more Mewtwo asks recently, I thought I would make a post to promote some of the Mewtwo fics that have caught my eye over the years. Here is a round-up of the ones that were the most memorable and influential to me when I was growing up, as well as some that look promising for other fans to check out!

MEMORABLE FICS:

1. Damaged by Cheshire Kat24

Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/8906040/1/Damaged

Summary: Living life to its fullest is never easy. A lesson Mewtwo learns the hard way after sustaining an injury that even his abilities cannot heal without help. With his new friends, he embarks on a journey that will define not only his place in the world, but that of his entire species.

My thoughts: While I never managed to read the entire story, this is a classic and was probably the first long, multi-chapter story with Mewtwo as the lead.

2. Shadows Like You by cosmicmewtwo

Link: Not available, though you can hit her up on Tumblr for the file.

Summary: Driven by his hunger for power, Giovanni creates three new Mewtwos. The clones seem to be under control...but for how long? And how will Mewtwo himself be affected?

My thoughts: This was incredibly influential to my writing, being a huge part of the inspiration behind “TPRS.” The Mewthrees introduced here were great and I checked every day for updates until this fic was complete. As a humorous aside, when I was a wee lass with barely any fic to my name, I sent cosmicmewtwo a message asking if I could use Mewthree characters in my own story, without realizing that cosmicmewtwo didn’t own that concept. She, bless her heart, confusedly told me to go ahead with my story and supported some of my earliest fics.

3. Anomaly by Dark Magician Girl Aeris

Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/3173119/1/Anomaly

Summary: When Mewtwo erased his memory from the minds of Team Rocket, he overlooked the computers they used in studying him. Now a second member of the race has been created by even more unorthodox means than the first. And boy, is she mad!

My thoughts: Aeris is excellent at writing Mewtwo, to the point where this is probably the most canon-compliant depiction of him that I’ve come across. This adventure story is also well-written and has a lot of feel-good moments. I wish that she’d managed to finish it, but what she has, along with the connected one-shots, is worth digging into.

4. The Sword and Shield Series by Kayasuri-n

Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/3535877/1/Sword-and-Shield

Summary: Detective Brenda Johnson was looking for something suspicious when she entered the lab, not a connection between Team Rocket and gym leader Giovanni Rocketto. She certainly wasn’t expecting Mewtwo. Rated M for Murder and other subjects.

My thoughts: So if you’re looking for a super fun murder mystery ride, this one is for you! I still desperately want to see what the remake would look like. That said, there are several entries in the old series, all of which are great.

5. More Than Just Shadow by Kirlien

Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/3602934/1/More-Than-Just-Shadow

Summary: Amy was sitting quietly on the doublebed, watching over the wounded Pokémon. “Mewtwo…What are you?…Who are you?” she whispered faintly, her fingers brushing against his cheek slightly in a soothing motion.

My thoughts: I remember this fic for how it captured the golden feeling of innocence in the Pokemon franchise. While dark things were happening in this story, there was a sense of warmth and compassion that I’ve always admired. This is another one that I wish had been finished, but what is here is worth digging into.

6. Between Two Worlds by Leonardo Mystic

Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/505048/1/Between-Two-Worlds

Summary: Ki is a teenage girl with special powers. Who one day accidentally discovers the Team Rocket project of Mewtwo. 

My thoughts: This was one of the first Mewtwo fics I ever read and was the most memorable in the romance category. I’d call it one of the classics and an interesting rewrite of the original movie. 

7. Forgotten by Melora Maxwell

Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/926885/1/Forgotten

Summary: The humans have a most strange saying. Curiosity killed the cat. I suppose in my case, it would be curiosity killed the clone. For it is what I am.

My thoughts: This one was responsible for the genesis of “Angelic Shadows.” It’s angsty and, despite being lean in the way of descriptions, it has a strong emotional impact. It’s a shame that it never got an ending, because it seems like it was within a few chapters of being complete. Even so, if you like gritty, this is a good one to look into.  

8. Eclipsed by Meriah

Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/4468231/1/Eclipsed

Summary: A young woman named Sutichay carries Arei, a miraculous child, whose birth will bring about a religious conflict. Later in the chaos, Arei is made the priestess of Mewtwo, and her growing attraction to him stirs the anger of Sabrina, his wife.

My thoughts: While this fic only has a few chapters, the premise is imagination, the writing is lovely, and it deserved more attention than it received. This was also the inspiration for my story “Hollow.” When Meriah discarded the original prologue for “Eclipsed,” she allowed me to use it—and the character Arei—as a jumping off point for my own story. The result was two very different tales with similar thematic cores.

9. The Incomplete Soul Saga by Miyuutsuu

Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/u/888889/Miyuutsuu

Summary: What is my true purpose in life?

My thoughts: If you’re looking for more grit, we have this odd series by Miyuutsuu, who wrote his stories with the Rule of Cool. Want Mewtwo to have a sword? An angsty romance with a gym leader? Possibly some loss of limbs? Then here you go! It’s a dark action/adventure story with a different flavor than anything else on this list.

10. Of Moonlight Shadows and Echoes Past by ZeoViolet

Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/620186/1/Of-Moonlight-Shadows-and-Echoes-Past

Summary: A Psychic teenager named Sharie, daughter of one of Mewtwo’s creators, finds a baby Mewtwo Giovanni forgot about…and eventually, runs into Mewtwo himself.

My thoughts: This was my favorite Mewtwo fic and one that I still think of fondly. The writing is lush, the premise is solid, and I definitely wanted to see where it would have gone. It’s another classic of the fandom.  

11. If You Let Me by Byoshi

Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/4129309/1/If-You-Let-Me

Summary: Every Pokemon Smasher must have a master, and the rule is no different for Mewtwo. A tug-of-war begins between Peach and Ganondorf, conflicted but united in their attempt to use Mewtwo to overthrow Master Hand.

My thoughts: I don’t have much to say about this one, other than I really enjoyed it, found the premise intriguing, and wished I could have seen more of the central relationship in it. Sadly, like many of these entries, it was discontinued.

PROMISING FICS:

These are fics that I haven’t actually read, but appear to have pull in the fandom and have definitely had a lot of hard work put into them.

12. Mute, Too by FalconPain

Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/3931388/1/Mute-Too

Summary: After losing a battle to the dark Pokémon Darkrai, Mewtwo awakens to find that he no longer has his psychic abilities. No longer able to float, read minds, or even talk to humans or Pokémon, he must rebuild his life. But how much of this can he take?

13. Forsaken by lilpurplebird

Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/5842142/1/Forsaken

Summary: Being a Legendary isn’t always a good thing—they realized that too late when the world came to an end. Mercifully, they were given another chance, but at a cost: They had agreed in a previous life to become mortal should they have failed to uphold their duties. Unbeknownst to them, however, there is a dark power lying in wait, targeting Mew and Mewtwo to do its dirty work…

14. Crossing of the Paths by MMMAJ Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/1252581/1/Crossing-of-the-Paths

Summary: Mewtwo can no longer stand living with humans, so he creates a dimensional portal and randomly wanders the web of infinite universes. This is the tale of the places he sees and the people he meets. 

15. Lines in the Sand by Shinymonkey8

Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/6847646/1/Lines-in-the-Sand

Summary: After finally escaping from Giovanni, Mewtwo has a chance to live his life free, and sadly alone… But when fate leads him to something he would have never expected, a female of his own species, his life is turned upside-down…. 

16. Human, Monster, Hybrid Series by TheFrogFromHell

Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/3082844/1/Human

Summary: When Mewtwo lured six trainers into his trap on New Island, he’d planned to begin his reign of terror on the human world. He hadn’t planned on being nearly destroyed by the battle that ensued, or on being nursed back to health by a human—a member of the species he’d despised enough to want to eradicate from the earth. Now, Mewtwo is torn between his hatred for his creators, and the new, mysterious emotions he feels for Misty, the human that saved his life. One again, his true purpose is in question: will he still choose to destroy the world, or will these unfamiliar insights change the way Mewtwo views humans, pokémon, and even himself. 

17. From Dark To Light by Whozawhatcha

Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/7659746/1/From-Dark-To-Light

Summary: Mewtwo falls for a Gardevoir, but hesitates to reveal any of his past to her, considering the circumstances. However, his past and Team Rocket do catch up to him, and how will they manage? And with strife with this Gardevoir’s mother, how will they continue to be together? What are her true motives for keeping her daughter from this mysterious pokemon?

18. The Mewblade Series by Vaporeon Lugia Krabby

Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/2967855/1/Her-Beginning

Summary: Welcome to the real complexity of the Pokemon World. Here we experience the full extent of this world alongside Mewblade, a Mewthree. This prologue introduces Mewblade, following the beginnings of Mewtwo. This opens a larger plot, full of depth and death.

Note: While this isn’t a Mewtwo-centric fic, it has been a prominent work in the fandom for ages.

SOME CAUTIOUS SMUT RECS:

So looking up Mewtwo smut can be dicey, since many of the writers of said smut tend to prefer dub-con or non-con scenes, with Mewtwo being a dominant alpha male/sexually-aggressive character. This can be triggering for some readers. The following two stories are not exactly exceptions to that pattern (well, “The Mewtwo File” is, but I have different qualms about it), but the romance in them helps to mellow them out.

19. The Mewtwo File by Alisonven

Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/4200365/1/The-Mewtwo-File

Summary: This is the story of the young clone Mewtwo and Aiko, his only human friend, the daughter of his creator.

My thoughts: This is a well-written story and has some good Mewtwo/Ai content in it, albeit features an AU version of them. That said, I have qualms about the sex in here, thanks to the difference between Mewtwo’s and Aiko’s psychological maturities. Aiko is clearly an adult, while Mewtwo reads more like a teenager. Some readers were fine with that; I felt squicked. There is also a casual use of sexual assault in a later chapter, so be aware of that going into this.

20. Primial Instinct by Sonic Sunshine

Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/3486169/1/Primial-Instinct

Summary: Mewtwo tells us the story of how he found and nearly lost love through his eyes. His journey of discovery is one filled with dilemmas, and even the most powerful Pokemon is helpless to stop it. Mewtwo x Lucario.

My thoughts: There are also casual uses of sexual assault in this, including from Mewtwo, which I wasn’t keen on. That being said, this is well-written and the central relationship is interesting, so who knows, it might scratch the yaoi itch for those of you who love the genre.

[dahlthir-blog]

    ➜ Irinushka Lollai has been accepted!

Welcome to Dahlthir, me! Your application for Irinushka Lollai has been approved. Since we are in our soft opening we will not be posting roleplay blogs yet but you can send one in for us to keep safe and sound in our inbox!

The character portion of the application can be found under the cut. Boi howdy it’s about time I made a character lol.

Other Characters: n/a

Faceclaim(s) & Series: Petrauchka from Chouritsu Houmuru Zyklus;Code

Character Name: Irinushka Lollai Housing (Please check here for housing options! If joining the Guild, please keep in mind that recruits generally live at the guild.): Guild Age: 22

Appearance (At least 3 sentences. Is there anything that can’t be quite communicated with your face claim? If they’re not actually human, please describe what they are here!):

    Her eyes are her most prominent feature, caramel-colored and unwavering. They stay steady with question, curiosity, or insult and have a habit of flashing, glinting for a second like light on glass, when feeling intensely. It is her eyes that command attention where her height cannot. Standing barely at 5 feet, Irinushka is often looked over until eye contact is established. Though some may notice her quickly in a group, her appearance strange and doll-like compared to some rugged adventurers at the guild.

    She is not human but an echo of a god, the entirety of their swan song compressed into one being. Irinushka’s body is made of her deity’s life, not only the magic but the memories. When injured it is not blood but words and sounds that leave her wounds. Generally, she can be healed like others but until she remembers what she’s forgotten she won’t feel whole. Eventually, it comes back. However, when she attempts to use too much magic whatever spell she is trying to do eats away at her. Irinushka’s eyes will darken and the outline of her body will reveal itself to be moving runes, most certainly indecipherable. These will unravel and feed into her spells and she will disappear word by word. It will take her time to come back from this, the words rewriting themselves until she is solid.

Are they a part of the Adventurer’s Guild? (Recruit or Full Member): Yes, recruit —- How long have they been part of the Guild: newly recruited. At most a few days

Warnings (If there are any triggers in your character’s background please list them here!): none that I know of

Personality (Please list 3 positive and 3 negative traits. Can simply be bullet points or can be expanded!):

- Discontent; It is never enough. There’s always something missing. She doesn’t know if it’s with her or with the world in general. She is rarely satisfied. There is this aimless hunger, this need she cannot direct and cannot stop.

- Clumsy; For a workaholic, she’s surprisingly clumsy and forgetful. It comes, perhaps, from all her wandering thoughts and memories. She needs to be worked or pressed to focus.

- Proud; The bitterness Lollai felt from the people’s ingratitude was passed on to Irinushka. She refuses to lower her head and feels as if she is owed something, anything, maybe an apology.

+ Curious; She wants to understand. She wants to learn. Irinushka will do what she can to get her answers whether it takes days of research or weeks of practice. It is her curiosity that pushes her to better herself.

+ Persistent; What carries Irinushka through a tough task is her persistence. One may say she’s determined, others may say she’s simply stubborn. Her family has taught her that progress may not come quickly but it can only come if one puts in the work.

+ Grateful; Help and kindness do not go unnoticed. Irinushka will show her thanks one way or another. Anyone that has helped her can rely on her whenever they need her help.

Background (Minimum of 5 sentences.):

    Lollai was the goddess of longing, dreams, and lullabies. Her worshipers lived in a land of forests, mountains, and snow. Winter never left completely, sitting always just beyond the doorstep of any season. Perhaps, she was born from the people’s wishes for warmth though burdened by their practicality. Wishing for warmth would not make warmth just as wishing for summer would not melt the snows. So Lollai was made, a minor deity to listen to the people’s wintry desires. She listened to the people’s wants, the aching they had they could not quiet, the dreams they dreamt in the hush of night, and she sang them to sleep or to rest though her words were not always heard. While her presence was comforting, she could not give the people food, she could not shelter them from storms, she could not outright help. She was not the goddess the people needed.

    Eventually, the towns and the villages moved and died. They dwindled, the frontier they had settled in proving to be too difficult, too harsh. Those that knew Lollai left and died and she, their goddess, could not move and could not help her weakening. A god without a people is little more than a tale, a legend, a story, and cannot even be a life. When only a handful of people knew of her and the final frontier town turning towards a decline, Lollai began to sing her swan song.

    A god’s swan song uses the entirety of their being; it is their final act. There is a chance a god can be reborn when people begin to remember them and believe in them but a swan song changes that. The god’s magic and memories are used and rewritten to make a new being: an Echo.

    Irinushka did not have a name when she was created but she knew Lollai. It was as if she had lived every day that the goddess had. She knew her hopes and her disappointments. She heard each praying thought and each bitter whisper. Irinushka knew Lollai before she knew herself but she knew what she was. Echoes cannot surpass their origins. They cannot live longer than the gods they come from, they cannot grow stronger than their god. There is already a known limit and a burden because echoes are made when the original cannot carry on any longer. Lollai had a distinct longing but it was one without a name to be attached to, it was simply a restlessness and discontent she could not shake. And now it was Irinushka’s to hold.

    Her life did not begin until she was held. For a long time, she was only a bundle time passed over in front of a dilapidated shrine most had forgotten. Until held by another creature, time would not touch her. Echoes are generally manifestations of a god’s dying wish or their final thoughts. They were not meant to die unnoticed and alone. So she stayed at the forest’s shrine until she was found by a family of three: Sanya, Yarik, and Feofil.

    They took her in and brought her to Rezavitra, a stubborn town of lumberjacks and survivors. For some time she grew up thinking Lollai was just a dream, some folk tale that took root during her childhood and would not let go. But it influenced her, even if she brushed it aside. Irinushka would not let her father, Yarik, tell her to stay inside. She would battle her restlessness and follow Feofil out into the forest even if the snows were taller than she was. She’d try and sate her curiosity by hiding beneath the town Witch’s window when she did her spells and try them herself. Everyone knew, even before Irinushka knew it herself, that she would leave the town. Yes, she loved her family, the townspeople, the environment but there was also a heaviness that rested within her when she went to bed at night. It felt a lot like disappointment and not unlike disgust. Sometimes, there was anger.

    After accidentally causing all of her family’s cows to fall asleep, Irinushka was taken in as an apprentice by Lyudumila, the town Witch. During her training, she was told that her magic was not like most as it took away from herself. When the lessons got more intense, Irinushka began to experience problems with her memories although the memories she had problems with were not exactly her own. It took a storm for Irinushka to accept she was an Echo.

    This storm was one that buried the town before it was even at its peak. Lyudumila tried to stop it and, for some time, was able to calm it enough for the townspeople to make preparations for a long time indoors. But she could not entirely end it. Irinushka, worried for her master who was facing the storm alone, escaped from her house to support the Witch. She tried imitating the spell and then poured her magic into combining her imitation with the Witch’s. She fed it and fed it until the storm was almost gone, as was she.

    Irinushka awoke two weeks later with her body made of moving runes vibrating with whispers of sound. She had pushed herself past her limits and could not remember parts of Lollai that had been closer to her than her family or herself. She felt weaker and lost but she knew with utmost certainty that she wanted to, she needed to, leave. Lollai disappeared once for the sake of these people and if she stayed she would do the same. After saying her goodbyes and her thanks, she left Rezavitra and took the name of the goddess she had been made from and for to carry it with her.

Level (Please make sure the level you’d like is open!): 2

General Powers/Abilities/Unusual Traits Description (Describe your character’s powers here. Some questions to think about are: What can they do? What is the range and the limit of their powers? How do they use their powers during an ordinary day?):

    Her magic is fairly flexible as she’s basically magic herself but it’s all dependent on sound. She can imitate spells she sees in action but it takes her a long time to feel out the shape of the spell or to find the right note. Easy spells to her are like hitting the right notes in a song and can be done pretty quickly. For harder spells, it’s like she’s sketching her copy of a painting before polishing it up to look as close to the original as it can be. The general rule for an echo is that an echo’s magic cannot surpass the source. So most of her magic is always weaker than other’s especially when copying spells.

    Irinushka builds her spells with sound before she releases them. The spell is like a bucket she wants to fill, the magic is the water, and sound is the pump. However, when the spell is too ambitious, she ends up harming herself.

Specific Powers/Abilities/Traits of Note (Can they turn people into animals? Can they destroy the moon? Please list and describe here the powers you specifically would like us to know.):

    The magic that Irinushka is especially good at is a bit like illusion magic. For example, she can create an illusion of a tidal wave and have it grow and grow according to the amount of magic she gives it and then she can have it crash down on her enemies. Though an illusion, they would take damage as if the wave were real but there would be no water to soak the ground or their clothing. It is a momentary magic. Thanks to Lollai, she excels at magic that has to do with dreams, music, and sleeping. These do not strain her as much as other forms do.

    The biggest detriment to her powers is her stamina. Irinushka can perhaps make one or two ‘big’ spells before the consequences begin to hurt her. If she pushes herself too far, she will end up falling unconscious and start to unravel. Due to this, she mainly sticks to supporting roles, using her ability to ‘feed’ magic to others.

Extra (Anything you’d like say!): n/a

[ludokratia-blog]

Inside The Magic Circle - En

Magic Circle is not a circle that pulls rabbits out of the top hat.

The Magic Circle is not necessarily a circle, actually, the magic circle is not physical, it is a place where we create and believe in what it has to offer us, it is not visible and it is not tangible, but it exists when you are playing.

The term Magic Circle was created by Johan Huizinga in his book Homo Ludens, in it he explains that the magic circle is a consecrated place, should be reestablished the playground area and materials to start to play the game or ritual. Then the player enters the arena, playground, board, magic circle.

Time later, in the book Rules of Play by Katie Salen and Eric Zimmerman, quotes again the Magic Circle as a place where the game occurs. The magic circle is created and the player enters inside it when the game starts.

In a lateral form, for instance, think in a chess game. There is a piece of wood with tiles and symbolic pieces. The game starts, the magic circle is created and this piece of wood becomes a battlefield that requires strategies from a general, the pieces become warriors and victory become your only goal.

But the Magic Circle is only about games?

No. Since ancient times the magic circle is created to engage us in stories that even though we do not know if it is real, and sometimes we know that is not real, but we believe and forget the real world that we live in. Rituals, traditions, stories around the campfire, theater, always losing who we are to be, manipulate, create and destroy other things.

To create myths and tales that will be told to others like a experience and move civilizations with this only engagement with the circle. Moving on to other generations with the same ritual that was first passed.

But for developers/Game Designers, the main question is “How do we bring the player to the Magic Circle?”, and even more “How do we keep the player in the Magic Circle?”.

First: Environment.

Imagine play Journey in the middle of a building of a house, or play a game that requires full attention but with your favorite TV series is passing. Well, you will being taken out from the magic circle all the time, and maybe you will not even understand what happened in the game.

The same story told by your friends or grandparents around a fireplace and told in an amusement park will not be the same experience.

A ritual to start the game will be necessary. The game VA-11 Hall-A : Cyberpunk Bartender Action starts with a warning saying : This game is best played getting comfortable. Grab some drinks, some snacks, and enjoy! This game is telling you how should be the ritual to get the best from this game. Other example is a horror game like Silent Hill, Resident Evil or Outlast, play it with friends making jokes and at the sunlight, that will ruin the tension that horror games want to pass. But the magic circle in horror games exists and comports in different ways, I will talk about that in another moment. Every ritual to this process will bring another very important part.

Second : Immersion

The immersion is the moment that you are submerged from head to toe inside the magic circle. Is that moment when some friend put the hand in your shoulder, you are pulled back to the reality and you remember that the real world exists.

Going back to the book Rules of Play, in a moment it quotes about Immersive Fallacy which is the idea that the pleasure of a media experience lies in its ability to sensually transport the participant into a illusory, simulated reality, so that the player truly believes that he or she is part of an imaginary world.

A clear example of this could be FPS(First Person Shooter) genre, these games have the First Person Camera because the player can feel powerful, with a gun in his hands, putting the player in the place of the soldier. That helps to get more immersive.

The immersion have a strong connection with the controls too. The power of send a command through a button and the character answer to that command is really important to have that connection between player and game, so be careful to not make the player frustrated with some Delay of the character when answering a command.

But something should not be done.

Third : The Big Pink Elephant

By the Title, you must have had a sense of what it means.

When the player is fully immersed, the coherence must be maintained. If not, the player will be out of the Magic Circle automatically.

Imagine a game about an indian in a forest, surviving of wild animals,  managing thirst and hunger, weapons to be crafted, AND SUDDENLY an OVNI with zombie nazis down from the space with the President of the United States as hostage.

That is a Big Pink Elephant, where it should be not in that context, dissonant to the game, that takes the player attention, he will look to other side or look confuse in some way. This moment the player you be launched out of the Magic Circle.

Seems absurd? But in games, a pizza explosion, wrong translation on HUD, a visible bug or even a simpler thing could put the player out of this world.

But, weird as it seems, The big pink elephant can improve the player immersion. If well made it can bring easily the player to a better fantasy world, and the player will look for more incredible things.

I will use a movie for this example. One of the most memorable scene in the movie Dumbo is the Pink Elephant Parade. It is the most out of the common and psychedelic scene in the entire movie, but probably is the easiest scene to remember.

But remember, always value the context. Even this weird scene from Dumbo have a motivation and reason.

The necessity of something fantastic is because your life is sooo boooring.

Fourth : Boring Life

You know, play a game about work 8 hours a day, get paid and then spent on the rent repetitively, without anything different from your real life, is not a game enjoyable to play. As much as it seem like real life and with nothing interesting, some games like Papers, Please uses political tensions and moral decisions to make the game interesting.

There is always Exceptions, there is a game called Euro Truck Simulator that the player need to drive from point A to point B making a delivery, respecting the streets, maneuvering and parking in the correct place.

But usually the games use a door to show you a new world, something fantastic that you have never seen before, unique characters, with interesting stories, charming and motivations beyond real life.

This is the why the players really like to play games like Battlefield, Hotline Miami and GTA, you can do things in another world that it is not possible in the real life, where the consequences, like kill someone does not apply to real world. You will not be going to jail for killing someone in GTA.

One of the simplest way to achieve this is in the first minutes of the game. Use something that call the attention of the player with something fantastic or an objective extremely clear. Like mario games where is very clear that you will need to save Princess Peach, Earthbound where Ness need to defeat Giygas or Shadow of the Colossus where you should defeat every single Colossus. All those games bring an adventure that is impossible to real life.

Another incredibly effective method is to create a mistery.

Fifth : Mystery, questions and the search for answers

Have you ever watched a bad movie, but finished it just because you want to know how it ends? what is the villain motivation? if the monster is defeated or the princess will be saved? That’s because the human being is curious, we need to know from the more complex things to the more simple ones. And if he do not have the answers he keeps mulling over, wanting to know the true ending. That is why there is so many fan stories about what would happen next. Movies like Inception or Halloween ends up with doubts so the viewer continues to think about the movie, discuss with friends and wait for the sequel to, maybe, have the answer to that question.

The truth is that they do not want to know the truth, but the feeling of curiosity say that he need the answer. The mystery is enjoyable to the human being. And in games it is not different, actually, that is the flashy point.

Take the example Oxenfree, an adventure game where many teenagers goes to a mysterious island. So, what part catches the player’s attention?

The island itself is something to be explored, the player want to know more about the island, why is it not inhabited? Why nobody goes there? Why are they going there? The dialogs, in each speech of Alex there is an information that says something about the characters, not only for Alex, but each one of the group. Beyond that, there is moments that subjects are left behind in exchange to go to another place, and the place goes “Hey, but I want to know what is happening back there too...”. Replay Factor is here and will make the game live longer.

But the most important from all of this is what is not yet said. Something weird happens with codes and speeches to the player, the radio of Alex makes a confused communication that will not be explained until the end of the game. The curiosity of the player will keep until the end and this is the motivation to the player to continue in this adventure

Sixth : FLOW

A good gameplay makes the player to enter FLOW.

FLOW, concept in psychology proposed by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, it is a mental state which the player is fully immersed. It is the balance between Difficulty and Skill of the player, but if the game became too difficult or the skill of the player is much greater than the difficulty, the player will go to the Anxiety or Boredom Field, removing the player from the magic circle or even the game itself.

That is my recommendations, if you have any critique, doubt or problems in translation, send me a message. Next time I will be posting the A&B, I will talk about immersion again, but a different type of immersion.

See you next time

References:

Johan Huizinga - Homo Ludens: a Study of the Play-Element in Culture.

Katie Salen Tekinbaş, Eric Zimmerman - Rules of Play: Game Design Fundamentals

Extra Credits - S7E23 - The Magic Circle - How Games Transport Us to New Worlds

Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi - Flow : Finding Flow: The Psychology of Engagement with Everyday Life

[who-do-i-know-this-man]

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*Never Full: A Tale of Adventure Curiosity and Hunger Without Ending