#Natalie scatorccio fanfic

[cannibalistickitty]

PHOTOBOOTH WITH NAT • 📸

summery: you and nat are alone in a photobooth and you decide to have some fun🦌

warnings: thigh riding (r!receiving)

notes: if it bothers you that I'm a minor and write smut do NOT interact or harass me

you and nat had been best friends for years, she was always the "cool" one, she drank and smoked, she hooked up with girls, while most of the time you decided to stay home .

today was one of your many days of the week where you'd go out with her, sometimes you'd go to the mall, maybe on a drive, it didn't matter where you went, all that mattered was that it was always just you two . out of the corner of your eye you saw a photobooth near an ice cream shop, 'nat c'mon let's go to the photobooth!' you pulled on her sleeve, walking with her towards it, she stepped in and sat down on the small pedal, 'c'mom sit on my lap' she patted her thigh .

the thought of sitting on her thigh made you nervous but you took the opportunity, you sat on her lap and adjusted your position, she groaned at the feeling but you chose to ignore it . 'okay press the green button' you listened to her commands and pressed the button in front of you, the robotic voice started to count down till the first photo would be taken . 'what pose should we do?' natalie asked, 'uhm maybe a heart' you shrugged, she nodded and put her hand in a half heart, you put yours up to hers and smiled for the photo

the bright light flashed and the first photo was done, you moved your legs and natalies thigh bumped perfectly against your clit, you quietly whimpered, hoping nat wouldn't hear , 'did you just whimper?' she cocked her head, you shook your head trying to play it off . 'i think you did' she placed her hands around your waist, 'i think my thigh hit your clit and you liked it' she whispered into your ear, you froze up and your breath hitched, she turned you around so you were straddling her lap .

'can I kiss you?' she leaned in, her face so close to yours you could feel her breath against your lips, 'mhm' you slowly nodded, she crashed her lips against yours, she wrapped her hand around the back of your neck and squeezed it, you moaned into the kiss as she pressed your core to her leg .

'you like that?' you perfusily nodded and continued grinding down, 'nat i want you' you said through kisses, 'yeah? you want me?' she chuckled, her hands slithered down to your hips, she pressed your clit down on her thigh and rocked your hips, the feeling was like no other, she sped up her pace and rocked your hips harder

you couldn't help but moan, you buried your face into her neck and bit her shoulder, at the moment she didn't even care about the pain, she was too busy focused on your orgasm, 'nat' you squealed, you grabbed onto her arms and felt a familiar feeling grow in your stomach, but this time it was much much more intense . 'm'gonna cum' you mumbled, you felt your wet cunt clench around nothing, 'you gonna cum? let it out baby, c'mon' she gently slapped your thigh .

your orgasm hit you like a brick, as soon as you felt your juices leak onto her jeans you heard the robotic voice count down, natalie was taking a photo as you rode her .

you felt yourself come down from your high you let go of natalie's arms, 'mhh' you tiredly hummed and lifted yourself off natalie . she pulled you back down in her lap and cupped your jaw, 'where ya going? we still got two photos left angel' she smiled

[ultrone]

𝗨𝗡𝗗𝗘𝗥 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗣𝗔𝗟𝗘 𝗠𝗢𝗢𝗡𝗟𝗜𝗚𝗛𝗧 ┊ 𝖿𝗐𝖻 𝗍𝗈 𝖿𝗋𝗂𝖾𝗇𝖽𝗌 𝗍𝗈 𝗅𝗈𝗏𝖾𝗋𝗌

+ best friends jackie and lottie

synopsis. after the crash, your friends with benefits arrangement with nat takes an unexpected turn. the two of you become inseparable, seeking solace in each other's company and ignoring the past that tied the two of you together — will the feelings you once concealed resurface, or remain hidden under the surface? (click here to see request)

cw. minor nsfw — descriptive hook-up session & mentions of masturbation, — jealousy, cursing.

wc. 4.4k

It had been a few weeks since the crash, and to say it had been tough would be an understatement. One day, you were brimming with excitement, ready to head to nationals with your team. The next day, you found yourselves stranded in the heart of the woods, far from any signs of civilization. However, amidst this dire situation, you were grateful to be surrounded by familiar faces — your teammates and your closest friends.

The crash had deeply affected the group, leaving everyone shaken to their core. In the aftermath, everyone clung to each other for consolation and support. For you, Jackie, Lottie, and Nat became your closest sources of comfort.

Jackie was quite the character. From being the team captain and wielding great influence, she had become the most "useless" member of the group. Although she made attempts to lift everyone's spirits, she showed little effort in actually assisting with any of the tasks. Even the simplest chores, like fetching water from the lake, made her pull a face and inwardly complain. You loved her a lot, as she was one of your closest friends along with Lottie, whom you've known since middle school. But her behaviour could be irritating at times, and you often felt burdened by her childlike demeanour.

“Jackie, you have to push it harder,” you told her, observing how she struggled to cut the meat with the knife. "And don't bend your wrist like that; you might hurt yourself," you advised.

“I am pushing,” She responded. She made another attempt, applying slightly more force, but her posture clearly revealed her lack of genuine effort. Holding the knife with one hand, barely gripping the back end, and raising her other arm in a nonchalant manner, she was far from giving it her all.

"No, you're not," you asserted, taking the knife from her grasp. “You have to push it ‘till it pops, just like Shauna taught us yesterday,” you demonstrated, doing it correctly.

“Yuck, gross,” she exclaimed, cringing and chuckling, moving away in disgust. “Ew.”

"It's not that bad," you replied, washing your hands in a bucket of lukewarm water placed on the table.

“Yeah, I’m not doing that,” she declared while crossing her arms, causing you to roll your eyes at her.

It wasn’t always bad though, after all, Jackie had always been the kind of person who knew how to brighten everyone up. Whenever you felt down or hopeless about the whole situation, she would find a way to comfort you, even if she herself felt the same. Whether it was through uplifting words or coming up with fun distractions, she always knew how to make you feel better.

But there was this one time when things took a turn. Around two weeks ago, Jackie came up with an idea for a spiritual game, similar to Charlie Charlie, and everyone agreed to play — except for Tai, Laura Lee, and coach Ben. The rest of you gathered on the second floor of the cabin, forming a circle and lighting candles in a sort of ritualistic manner. Shauna took on the role of the "messenger" or something like that, holding a pendulum to contact the spirit of the dead man who had been in the cabin when you arrived.

At first, it was fun, with questions about crushes and gossip floating around. However, as time went on, the tone shifted dramatically. Javi's question about the possibility of death out in the wilderness cast a somber cloud over the group, plunging everyone into a more serious mindset. And that's when everything took a turn for the worse. The ambiance abruptly shifted when all the candles extinguished simultaneously, and Lottie appeared to be possessed. She muttered incomprehensible words in French and injured her forehead, causing it to bleed. The situation became so alarming that Laura Lee instinctively grabbed a Bible and threw it at Lottie, which eventually snapped her back to reality. However, she was never the same after that incident.

Looking back, Lottie and you became friends back in middle school. One day, while you were playing alone on the swings, a young Taissa suddenly pushed you and ran off, laughing mischievously. You ended up falling on your knees and scraping them, causing a small amount of bleeding. Trying to hold back your tears, you heard a gentle voice coming from behind you.

"Are you okay?" You glanced up and saw a girl with long brown hair cascading over her shoulders. She had two strands of hair tied up at the back with a pink bow.

You nodded shyly, trying to keep a tear from falling as you rubbed your eye.

"Don't cry!" she said with concern. "Come on, let's go to the bathroom and get you cleaned up," she suggested, extending her hand toward you with a warm smile.

You slowly smiled back and took her hand. "Thank you," you said softly. She assisted you in standing up and then guided you carefully towards the bathroom.

"By the way, my name is Charlotte, but everyone calls me Lottie," she introduced herself with a wide grin. "What's your name?" she asked, curiosity evident in her eyes.

"My name is Y/n," you replied, returning her smile.

Ever since you were young, Lottie had always been an incredibly caring and loyal friend. She was full of fun and wit, and if anything bad ever happened, she would defend you as if her life depended on it. But after the incident at the cabin, something changed within her. It was hard to put into words. She was still the same Lottie you had always known, yet somehow different at the same time.

You had been aware of Lottie's struggle with schizophrenia for a few years now. She had entrusted you with this information, being the only friend she had opened up to about it. After the crash, you became increasingly concerned because you knew it was only a matter of time before she ran out of her medication. Gradually, you began to notice peculiar behaviour from her, and she acknowledged it as well. Still, you tried to reassure her, believing that her odd actions were merely a result of adjusting to a lower dosage of her pills.

However, after the incident, strange occurrences started happening that left you questioning whether Lottie's diagnosis of schizophrenia was accurate. How could she have stopped Tai's sleepwalking problem and even attracted a bear to the cabin when everyone was on the verge of starvation? It felt too coincidental to ignore.

Nevertheless, despite any of these events, your relationship with both Jackie and Lottie remained intact. If anything, those experiences only strengthened the bond you shared with them. However, if you were being completely honest, the person who provided you with the most comfort at the moment was Nat. She seemed like the only stable presence in your life, unaffected by childlike behavior or unpredictable episodes. She was simply the same old Nat you had always known, perhaps a bit more apprehensive, but still maintaining her usual chill and nonchalant demeanour. 

Nat and you had an unusual story, if you could even call it that. You first met during soccer practice, although you didn't interact much at the time. You held the co-captain position while Jackie excelled as the team's captain. Though you weren't as skilled at leading as Jackie was, you were known for being one of the kindest souls on the team, getting along with pretty much everybody — and of course, your skills on the field were top-notch, — which led to your selection as co-captain.

On the other hand, Nat wasn't as involved in the team dynamics as you were. She was a talented player and got along well with most of your teammates, but she spent most of her time hanging out with Kevyn or her own group of friends, usually getting high or drunk during school hours. The only moments you really shared with her were in the empty locker room, either before anyone else arrived or right after everyone else had left. Interestingly, many of your memories together involved her grabbing your ass and sticking her tongue in your mouth. Not that it bothered you in the slightest.

“Fuck Nat—,” you groaned faintly as the girl attacked your mouth with her tongue, tenderly biting your bottom lip. She was pressing you against the wall, and your hands were tangled in her hair as her hands slowly worked her way up your abdomen, seeking your breasts.

Just as she was about to grab them, a loud whistle from outside the locker rooms interrupted the moment, followed by a grunt from Nat.

"Fuck, we've got to go," you said hastily.

"Do we really?" she responded casually, pushing you harder against the wall and sliding her hands to your breasts, holding them tightly. She peppered open-mouthed kisses along your neck, eliciting soft moans from you. But mustering all your strength, you gently pushed her away.

"Yes, we do," you said, giving her a quick peck on the lips before darting out of the room. Glancing back at her, you motioned for her to follow. She rolled her eyes but quickly caught up with you.

Before the crash, you never imagined Nat and you would become close friends. In fact, if someone had told you that you would spend most of your time together, doing things and just hanging out, you would have probably laughed at them. Both of you came from completely different worlds, and while you didn't actively avoid each other, she was seen as an outcast while you were considered popular. The fact that the two of you were secretly involved with each other was already a big boundary crossed. But the crash changed everything. It not only took away your innocence, but also erased any social barriers that had previously prevented you from interacting.

And so you did.

The first time you interacted with each other was right after the crash. You woke up in the galley, trapped under a fallen food cart. Panicked and surrounded by the increasing flames, you struggled to free yourself. No matter how hard you pushed, the cart wouldn't budge in the narrow space. It felt like the end. But then, in a swift move, Nat appeared and managed to move the cart aside. She reached out her hand, and you grabbed it, escaping just seconds before an explosion engulfed the area.

You owed her your life, and a simple thank you didn't seem sufficient. So, you started assisting her with tasks and accompanying her on hunts, as a way to repay her. But what began as gratitude quickly became something more. Spending time together became your favourite activity. The more you talked, the closer you grew, finding solace and comfort in each other's company. Yet, you both consciously avoided discussing your pre-crash relationship, as if you had made an unspoken agreement to forget the past and start anew, as if you had only met in the aftermath of the crash.

However, you couldn't deny that sometimes you found yourself staring at her lips for longer than you should, or imagining the sensation of her hands against your skin. Even mundane tasks like watching her handle equipment or lift something heavy would trigger images of her effortlessly carrying you or holding you against a wall. Initially, you indulged in these memories, closing your eyes and relishing in them while trying to find release on your own. But as time went on, these memories intertwined with your growing feelings for her. What was once a simple burning in your core, started to evolve into butterflies in your stomach and a persistent ache in your heart.

So you stopped.

You made a conscious decision to stop dwelling on those thoughts. You went cold turkey, cutting off any mental imagery or fantasies that surpassed the boundaries of friendship. And so far, this self-imposed restraint seemed to be working.

It had been a chill day, with everyone finishing their tasks ahead of time and not much else to do but engage in conversations or let their minds wander. Jackie, as always, came up with an idea to make the evening more special. Instead of having dinner at the cabin as usual, she proposed building a cozy bonfire by the river and enjoying quality time together, reminiscent of the day of the plane crash when all of you gathered around a bonfire on that first night, sharing stories and laughing. Everyone readily agreed, and it was decided to meet at the designated spot once darkness had fully descended upon the sky.

As Shauna took charge of preparing the meat, Van and Tai pitched in by gathering wood for the bonfire. Lottie, Mari and you took on the task of gathering blankets to ensure everyone would be warm and comfortable. The remaining members of the group found various tasks to assist with, each contributing to the preparations in their own way.

When the moment arrived, all of you met at the designated spot and settled into your seats. Jackie positioned herself between Shauna and Lottie, and you found yourself sandwiched between Lottie and Nat. The rest of the team took their seats accordingly, creating a circle around the fire. Each person grabbed a stick and skewered a piece of meat, holding it above the flames to cook it to perfection before taking a bite.

"The things I'd do to have a working walkman right now," Tai said with a sigh, chewing a piece of her meat.

"It's okay, we’ve got Crystal to bless our ears, right you guys?" Van joked, making everyone chuckle, except Crystal, who blushed in embarrassment.

"What was that song Y/n was obsessed with? The one she always played in the shower after practice," Jackie asked while laughing at the memory.

"Wasn't it Pump Up The Jam?" Shauna asked, trying to remember.

"No, it was—" You got interrupted by Lottie and Nat, who spoke up at the same time.

"Be My Lover," both of them said with smiles on their faces. They looked at each other and chuckled when they realized they said the same thing. However, you noticed that Nat's smile fell too quickly to be genuine, but you didn't mention anything.

"And then she stopped listening to it because the last time she did, she slipped while dancing in the showers and pulled the curtain down with her as she fell," Van began, laughing loudly.

"And then Coach Ben walked in and saw her on the floor," Jackie finished, laughing along with everyone else.

“And now that image is forever ingrained in my memory,” Coach Ben said with a hint of humour, making a grimace.

“I thought we all agreed not to speak of this ever again,” you said with an embarrassed huff, unable to hide your growing smile.

For the rest of the evening, all of you continued to joke around and share stories, until all the meat had been eaten and the firewood was nearly depleted. Eventually, everyone returned to the cabin, ready to catch some sleep.

You had been lying down with your eyes closed for an hour already, but for some reason, sleep eluded you. Growing impatient, you wondered whether a walk to the lake could help you relax. 

In stark contrast to the city, the sky here remained untainted, free from any traces of pollution, affording you an unobstructed view of the shimmering stars. Not only that, but the hush and serenity of the night filled you with a sense of tranquility; there was something enchanting about being awake while the rest of the girls — and the world — slumbered.

While lost in thought, you caught a faint sound of sheets shifting. You turned to your left and saw Nat moving under the covers. She scratched her head, indicating that she was still awake. You moved closer to her and softly rested your hand on her shoulder, causing her to jump a little.

"Hey, Nat," you whispered, softly calling out her name, ensuring only she could hear you. She turned towards you, her weary eyes showing a hint of concern.

"What's up? You good?" she asked, her brow slightly furrowed.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I just can't seem to fall asleep," you confessed, toying with the edge of the pillow using your fingers.

"Same here," she admitted, biting her lip.

"Wanna come outside with me?" you asked, a glimmer of excitement in your eyes.

"And do what?" she inquired, curiosity evident in her tone.

"Just come," you replied confidently. Without hesitation, you gingerly slid the blanket off your body and rose to your feet, moving stealthily towards the door, careful not to make a sound. Nat quietly trailed behind you, mirroring your every move.

As soon as you stepped outside, the autumn weather greeted you with a contrasting mix of warmth and a chilly breeze caressing your skin. Walking ahead, Nat followed closely behind you, the sound of fallen leaves crackling beneath your shoes as you made your way towards the lake.

"Are we heading to the lake?" Nat inquired.

"No, we're actually going to Seven Eleven," you responded in a sarcastic tone.

"Ha ha," she chuckled in the same tone, nudging your shoulder with a grin.

You continued walking until you reached the edge of the lake, coming to a halt. Closing your eyes and inhaling deeply, you felt a wave of relaxation wash over you, as if the scenery before you had a calming effect. Opening your eyes, you swiftly removed your pants, letting them fall to the ground, and proceeded to take off your shirt while making your way towards the water.

"It’s like three in the morning, Y/n. Are you insane?” She asked incredulously.

“What? You scared?” You playfully teased, dashing into the water.

She let out a huff, a chuckle escaping her lips as she watched you. Unable to resist the temptation, she stripped off her own clothes and followed closely behind you, a smile lighting up her face as she raced towards you.

As she drew closer, the water already lapping at both of your knees, she playfully gave you a shove, causing you to tumble into the water with her falling on top of you. Laughter erupted from both of you as you playfully wrestled in the water. Eventually, you managed to wriggle free from her grasp and swam farther into the lake, the water gradually rising until it reached your neck. It had a pleasant temperature, neither cold nor warm, just perfect.

Submerging your head underwater, you emerged with a graceful backward flick, water droplets cascading from your fluttering eyelashes. As your vision cleared, you spotted Nat floating in the water right in front of you. Her platinum-white hair floated gracefully around her head, her eyes peacefully closed, and her lips slightly parted as her breathing slowed down after all the splashing around. The moonlight above you cast a gentle glow, reflecting off her wet body, creating an ethereal illumination that highlighted her features.

Under the soft glow of the moon, her body appeared breathtakingly beautiful, captivating you completely. You found yourself unable to tear your gaze away, consumed by a feeling of longing. You swam closer to her, mirroring her position but facing the opposite direction, aligning your head next to hers. Closing your eyes, you took a deep breath and exhaled, relishing the gentle caress of the water against your body. The only sounds that filled the air were the rhythm of your breaths and the tranquil melodies of nature. Amidst the aftermath of the plane crash, there were small moments like this that held a special allure—dashing to a lake in the dead of night, immersing yourselves in the water, far from the flickering lights and urban clamour. It was just the two of you and the tranquil embrace of nature.

"I wish we could stay like this forever," you murmured, your voice filled with yearning. Nat simply hummed in response, fully engrossed in the moment and not even bothering to muster a reply.

A couple of minutes passed in peaceful silence before you broke it once again. "You were acting weird today," you remarked, your tone tinged with curiosity.

"What do you mean?" she asked calmly, her voice a little raspy from not having spoken for a while.

"I don't know, your energy just felt off," you explained. "You seemed somewhat uncomfortable when Lottie and you coincidentally named my song at the same time."

Her eyes slowly fluttered open at your words, unsure of how to respond. She gazed up at the twinkling stars, momentarily losing herself in their beauty.

"That's quite a specific observation," she chuckled lightly.

You joined in with a soft laugh. "I guess I just noticed." You started, "Whenever the three of us are together, you seem to grow tense, but I can't really explain it," you continued. "Did you and Lottie have a fight or something?"

"No, it's not that..." she replied, her voice laced with uncertainty.

"Then what is it?" you pressed, looking for an answer.

"I don't know," she replied, her voice uncertain. "I guess she's always talking about you and wanting to be around you," she trailed off.

"But we're best friends, isn't that normal?" you asked, genuinely puzzled.

"Well, yeah, but she's annoying about it," she continued, frustration creeping into her voice. "She acts like she knows you better than anyone else, and-"

You interrupted her. "So you're jealous," you said, a playful smile forming on your lips.

"What? No," she replied incredulously, chuckling nervously.

"Mhm," you teased.

"I am not jealous," she insisted, her voice firm.

"Then why are you blushing?" you asked, turning to look at her and noticing a faint red hue on her cheeks.

"What?" she exclaimed, her hand instinctively reaching up to touch her flushed cheeks. Realizing how warm they felt, she abruptly stopped floating and stood still, swiftly moving her hand and splashing water onto your face.

"Hey!" you exclaimed, water rushing up your nose. Coughing lightly, you stood up and retaliated by splashing water back at her. Anticipating your comeback, she quickly covered her face, but you managed to splash water at her again.

Laughter erupted from both of you as you continued wrestling in the water, playfully throwing water at each other. She reached for your arms to halt your assault, but you surprised her by submerging her head underwater briefly before releasing her.

"You little...," she laughed, coughing and rubbing her nose with her hand.

Seeking revenge, she pulled you closer, causing your legs to instinctively wrap around her as her hands gripped your waist tightly, and she sank the both of you beneath the water's surface. After a few seconds, your need for air grew too strong, and you began pushing her shoulder, signalling for her to surface, which she did.

With your legs still secured around her waist, you used your hands to push your wet hair back and rub your eyes. As your vision cleared, you rested your hands on her shoulders and suddenly realized how close you were. Your legs held tight, and you felt the lingering touch of her left hand on your body as she rubbed her eyes and nose with her other hand. When she finished, she met your gaze, slowly placing her hand back on your waist.

Both of you locked eyes, your breaths and heartbeats increasing in sync. The suppressed thoughts and desires you had kept hidden for so long began resurfacing, and this time, you made no attempt to suppress them. Her intense gaze lingered on you, her eyebrows slightly furrowed, her dilated pupils captivated you with each flutter of her wet eyelashes, and her half-open, moist lips tingled with anticipation. Fuck it, you thought. Without a second thought, you swiftly pressed your lips together in a passionate kiss, leaving no room to breathe. It was a slow and fervent kiss, conveying the depth of your longing and how much you had yearned for this moment, for her. Your hands traveled from her shoulders to her hair, while your lips captured her bottom lip, gently sucking on it. She loosened her grip and instead embraced you, pulling you closer against her body, craving the warmth of your body against hers. Reasserting her dominance, she lightly nibbled on your lip, silently asking for entrance. It only took a slight pressure of her centre against yours under the water for your mouth to part slightly, allowing her agile tongue to explore your mouth as you let out a groan. 

Your lips continued their rhythmic movements, growing plump and red, pulsating with a delightful ache, while your lungs screamed for much-needed air. Finally, the two of you reluctantly broke apart, the silence broken by your words.

"Fuck... You don’t know how much I've missed this," you confessed, locking eyes with her, your fingers tenderly caressing the nape of her neck.

"Me too," she breathed, her gaze fixated on your lips. Her hands moved from your waist to your cheeks, gently cupping them as she pulled you into another kiss, this time filled with tenderness and love. You wrapped your arms around her neck, drawing her closer, fully immersing yourself in the moment.

She pulled back slightly, her breath caressing your lips. "I'm so fucking jealous of Lottie," she admitted with a raspy voice. "She makes me so mad," she confessed, before capturing your lips in another soft kiss, laced with a hint of frustration. "I hate it when she makes you laugh," she murmured between kisses, "And I hate that she's always following you around like a lost puppy." She gave you one last kiss before pulling away, her face just a few centimeters away from yours, and using one of her thumbs to softly caress your swollen bottom lip.

Her words left you puzzled, but deep down, they were everything you had ever longed to hear from her. Gathering your thoughts, you responded, "Well, you don't have to worry about that too much."

She slowly shifted her gaze from your lips to your eyes, her brows furrowing slightly as she stared at you with a perplexed expression.

"Because I love you," you confessed, causing Nat's heart to skip a beat at your unexpected declaration.

"What?" she stammered, her eyes searching yours for any signs of deceit.

"I love you, Nat," you repeated, your voice brimming with sincerity and honesty. "I've loved you for so long that I honestly don't know how I've kept it to myself all this time," you confessed. "I love you," you reiterated once more.

"Fuck, Y/n," Nat uttered, her face reflecting disbelief and astonishment. "I love you too," she finally said, unable to contain her emotions, before pulling you into another tender kiss. The two of you stood there, savoring each other's embrace, only illuminated by the soft glow of the pale moonlight.

[anoncarrott]

The Yellowjackets are a girl rock band. Here's their Instagram's

based on a fanfic i'm writing (link above obv). i can't help myself except to make fake instagram's for every fic i write oops

[nattroan]

𝓦𝑒𝑙𝑐𝑜𝑚𝑒 𝑡𝑜 𝑚𝑦 𝑠𝑒𝑐𝑟𝑒𝑡 𝑙𝑖𝑏𝑟𝑎𝑟𝑦✦ 𝑓𝑖𝑐 𝑟𝑒𝑐𝑠♡🌷

𝐻𝑖𝑖<3 guys I leave these recommendations so that if you can take a little of your time to read these beautiful fics, do it because you won't regret it, please, I beg you to reblog it and give it a like because I need these writers and the wonderful fics that they They make them have more recognition (by the way, thanks to the writers for taking a few minutes and even hours of your time to make such wonderful fics)

𝓝𝑎𝑡𝑎𝑙𝑖𝑒 𝑠𝑐𝑎𝑡𝑜𝑟𝑐𝑐𝑖𝑜:

SPIDER!NATALIE @abbysbabe

-the bet @24hlevi

Natalie does your eyeliner @pinkmoonzzz

The wilderness dance @lacyscabinet

—dizzy like! @shaunashipmansgf

Cool About It @rae-writes-sometimes

calming the storm @coalswriting

Unexpected Christmas @devskindawritingblog

Safe @lacyscabinet

Dreamy @lacyscabinet

I miss home @t1ts-4-scattorcio

Spider @ones-g

—✦

𝓛 𝑜𝑡𝑡𝑖𝑒 𝑚𝑎𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑤𝑠:

𝐅𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐡 𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐬 @lottiembae

Notion @fromabasementonthehilll

Braids @fromabasementonthehilll

—✧

𝓡𝑜𝑏𝑖𝑛 𝑏𝑢𝑐𝑘𝑙𝑒𝑦:

Chiquitita @sawyerconfort

Puppy Love @elliesmainhoe

Wrong locker @ashwhowrites

—✰

𝑺ℎ𝑎𝑢𝑛𝑎 𝑠ℎ𝑖𝑝𝑚𝑎𝑛:

facing your fears @alottiegoingon

evermore @shaunamilfman

(If you want to find some really good fanfics or headcanons about Shauna x reader or Jackieshauna x reader check out their masterlist)

—✦🤍🪽

𝑺𝒂𝒓𝒂𝒉 𝒄𝒂𝒎𝒆𝒓𝒐𝒏✦:

𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑮𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒆𝒔𝒕 𝒐𝒇 𝑳𝒖𝒙𝒖𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒔 @writingreadinglurkingandsmirking

—☘︎☏➳

𝓛 𝑎𝑢𝑟𝑎 𝑙𝑒𝑒♡:

Drunken Love @devskindawritingblog

—🤍🕸

𝓗𝑎𝑧𝑒𝑙 𝑐𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑎ℎ𝑎𝑛✰:

Hold to my Hand @denwritesandcries

[mvlders222]

𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐢 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐧𝐨𝐰

based off of the pixies song with the same name

pairing ; natalie scatorccio x fem!reader

wordcount ; 1.3k

summary ; while the yellowjackets team has plans to set up their own homecoming party, "doomcoming" if you will, natalie sneaks off only to find you. left alone with your thoughts and a bottle of alcohol, you have no choice but to confront each other about what was left unhandled before the crash.

warnings ; travis slander!!! alcohol, underage drinking, mention of nausea, angst, fluffy at the end. centered around episode s1xe9 "doomcoming." lowercase intended

"what are you doin' out here?" you looked up to see natalie pushing her way through bushes to get to you. you were sitting on the dirt close to the large tree that stood behind you. the roots were too uncomfortable to sit on properly.

you had previously held your head to your knees and away from the others, the world, and anyone who may've been watching. natalie glimpsed at your tear-stained cheeks in disdain, a sour taste left in her mouth as she tried to swallow it down.

you looked up to meet her gaze, quickly wiping the tears away. you didn't want her to see you like this. vulnerable. nothing seemed to have come from your efforts, however. lighter tears still emitting from your eyes. "nothing," you responded.

that clearly didn't work, as now she'd made her way closer. "doesn't seem like nothin'," her thick accent pushing through. it was one of the many features you had always loved about her. she sat down next to you, avoiding the tough roots that had grown their way underneath the ground and rock.

"i don't wanna talk to you right now," you sniffled a bit.

"you're not the first. i feel like everyone hates me right now." she looked down at the ground before her. her tone made it seem like she didn't care, but she had been hurt by your words.

you and natalie had had a past. it was full of hidden love for one another. skipping class to go makeout in the janitor's closets, having girl's nights whenever your parents were out of town. nothing had ever been official, and while you had feelings for her, you still believed that she had just been using you. but if this was the closest you two would ever get, you'd take that over ruining your friendship.

she was like a drug, though. you loved being around her, and the risk of getting caught was thrilling. but when you were apart, you were left alone with your thoughts and that was more horrifying than any boogeyman hiding under a child's bed.

everything changed after the crash, she had been going on longer hunts with travis and it had been hard to hide your dates. you started seeing her less and less and hated that she left you for a boy.

"what about travis?" you glanced at her slightly, secretly hopeful for her answer, although the thought of them made you want to vomit. "i thought you two were, um, together..?"

"i thought so too. actually, i thought i had feelings for him. he just thinks i'm a slut because i don't fit his perfect image," she laughed at this. "seriously, i don't know what i was thinking."

"he's a dick." that was all you could come out with. natalie laughed at the lone sentence. "he's more than a dick," she responded.

"do you remeber us? when we were happy?" you stared at her with those sad eyes. god, those eyes. she could never lie to you.

"yeah," she said without thinking. "i'm... sorry... about all of this."

it was silent after that. an eternity of awkward silence and you didn't exactly know how to break it. "just go back to the party, okay? i'm not ready yet."

"it was getting boring anyway." she pulled your attention to the bottle of what looked like cheap bourbon. "you want some?" she uncapped it and held it out to you.

without a word, you grabbed the bottle and took a swig. after a couple gulps, you handed it back to the girl and wiped your chin of any drink that dribbled down.

"jesus, do you have nothing to live for?" she teased while grabbing the bottle. her smile slightly dropped when she saw the look on your face. it was one of hopelessness, and your eyes, empty.

"not anymore." you rubbed your nose and sniffled. you turned to face her fully now. "i was gonna go to college, you know. i don't wanna be a housewife who hates my husband, dropping my kids off at soccer practice." tears started to well up in your eyes again at the very thought of this.

"you're overthinking. trust me, that's not gonna happen." natalie brought the bottle away from her lips and looked at you again.

after a couple of sips from the both of you, the bottle was now nearly empty. while that conversation was long forgotten by natalie, it still remained in the back of your mind, taunting you.

"how do you know?" it wasn't meant to be mean, it was a genuine question.

natalie had no idea what you were talking about. as her laughing died down from some stupid joke she made, confusion quickly took over. "huh?"

"how do you know what's gonna happen? after all this?" natalie looked deeply into your eyes and reached out to grab your hand.

"'cause giving yourself away to a man doesn't give you purpose. you're throwing your life away!" she was talking like you were out of your mind. and maybe you were, or maybe it was just the alcohol. because the next thing you did you would've never been able to have the courage to do.

you wrapped your hand around the back of her neck and pulled her close to you. your lips landed on hers and she kissed back without hesitation. in that moment, time stopped. the earth stopped spinning and you were the only two people on the planet.

after a while, you pulled back, much to her dismay, and rested your forehead against hers. she was left speechless at how forward it was. "i, um, wow..."

"tell me, how that one kiss was different than the thousands we've shared?" you teased her, filled with confidence knowing that you're the one that had left her flustered.

"it's been... a while," she finally pulled her head away from yours and stared at you earnestly. "you never know what you have until you've lost it, yeah?"

you smiled at her words. it may have not been the best thing to say in that moment, it may have been sort of dopey, but in that moment it had made your heart full again.

"i regret ever leaving you." natalie shook her head and she seemed ut of breath. "even if we never had anything before now. it hurts to think about."

"i love you," you startled yourself with your own words. now it was your turn to be flustered. "sorry," you laughed awkwardly.

natalie giggled, now feeling happier than ever. she kissed you deeply once more. she didn't have to say it back for you to understand that she really did love you back.

you didn't know what was going to happen next, or if you were going to remember this in the morning, but it didn't matter because she was all yours and you were hers.

[aemmawrites]

She who writes. Pre-crash Nat Scatorccio

Nat Scatorccio x fem/gn reader

cw-friends to lovers

Wc-650

Part one

Journal entry: Wednesday. April 3rd, 1996

Have you ever had a conversation with Natalie, it is the most interesting thing I have ever experienced. For instance one time we were at the local hair store buying hair dye and she turned to me a said, and I quote "would you be bestfriends with me if I was this box of hair dye."

She stood there staring at you awaiting a response. I looked at her before stating "Uhh, how would we be able to talk if you were a box of hair dye? That doesn't even make any sense" She giggled before saying "don't think about it too much, yes or no?" you sighed "sure Nat, I would be you best friend if you were box of hair dye”

“What are you writing now, you're not even paying attention to the movie" you glanced up at her, the smell of cigarettes invading your space when she moved closer to you. "I'm writing a story about the ultimate demise of the girl who kept interrupting me while I was writing." she pouted at you and you rolled your eyes. "You're adorable, but not that adorable to stop me from writing" you smiled up at her as she took a drag of her cigarette. "Want some or are you still being a good girl”

You froze, getting flustered, "I- I well i'll take one actually." You said trying to feign any ounce of confidence you still had. She smiled at you, inhaling a big puff of smoke before pulling you closer and blowing the smoke into your mouth, analyzing your face to see how you'd react. You blew out the smoke, as a fit of coughs came quickly after, you could smell her cherry chapstick on your lips and all you could do was stare at her trying to analyze what just happened, that had to be something best friends do right? Just best friends being best friends. Nat started to smirk as she realized she had flustered you, pushing a strand of hair out of your face.

“You ok?" she asked, trying to hold back a smirk, she knew exactly what she was doing. Nat went to say something when she realized you weren't going to respond the hesitated before saying "fuck it"

Cherry's.

You've never liked cherry's so much until right now.

The smell of them, the taste of them, and how natalie tasted with the cherry’s. The way her thumb caressed your cheek the way she dropped her last cigarette onto your bed as if it wasn't even there to begin with. The way you both tried to hold your breath so you wouldn't have to leave the grace and the beauty you called each other's lips. And oh how nat smiled against your lips and her shoulders relaxed as her confidence took over her. She backed away from you, her thumb still tracing circles on your face.

"Since I'm such a good kisser does this mean I get to choose the next movie? " Nat said, her voice just barely above a whisper.

"Yeah, but you might have to kiss me again," you joked before pulling her back in.

[peach-and-bugs]

-"Nat" Natalie Scatorccio-

Back to Masterlist

Natalie Scatorccio Tag List: (open)

Tag list information

-Key-

♥︎- romance

✸- platonic

✰- fluff

✄-angst

✧- contains/is smut (18+)

✾- request

- Natalie Scatorccio SWF Alphabet - Ao3 Tumblr (1/1)♥︎✰✄

- Natalie Scatorccio NSWF (+18) Alphabet - Ao3 Tumblr (1/1)♥︎✰✄✧

- Blame Game - Natalie Scatorccio (pre crash) x fem!reader - Ao3 Tumblr (1/1)♥︎✰✄✾

Natalie seeks refuge from the rain (and possibly comfort) after the death of her dad...

- I'm Out of Time - Natalie Scatorccio (post-crash, 2000) x fem!reader - Ao3 Tumblr (1/1)♥︎✄✧✾

You hadn't seen Natalie for years. Not since she'd come back after the crash, and you were alright with that. You'd taken time for yourself and you'd moved on. You were working on your degree and finding yourself. You weren't anticipating any interruptions…

[killerdrabbles]

H.O.W. - Humans of Wiskayok

"Yeah I left home when I was sixteen years old. My dad came down on me really hard about my grades and my boyfriend -and I didn't even have a boyfriend- so I ran. Packed a bag and everything. Then I got to the bus station and only had like a dollar to my name and realized I wasn't going anywhere.

Went back home to serve the rest of my sentence. He died a few weeks later. Miserable cunt. Was stuck with my mom but by then she wasn't much better. The only bright spot I had was my soccer team. We were good, man. We were gonna go places. I really believed that. Night before nationals I was at this party. I remember thinking to myself 'boy this is it now'. I can still feel the electric energy before a match. How your body feels when every single part of it is humming with excitement.

Took some shrooms though and never made it to the game. I mean, a bunch of other stuff happened as well, but I don't wanna talk about it. Nowadays I'm still trying to figure out myself. I made a few mistakes, broke some people I didn't mean to break. But hey... maybe I'll find a way to pay them back someday."

[mxlti-fand0m-imaginess]

Natalie Scatorccio Masterlist

none yet!

[hattersarts]

everyone watch yellowjackets season 2 comes out march 26th

[cannibalistickitty]

BSF!NAT TAKING YOUR VIRGINITY ⚡

summery: your best friend offers to take your virginity 🍁

warnings: virgin!reader, oral (r!receiving) fingering (r!receiving)

notes: hai everypony more smut, once again please do not harass me or interact with me if it bothers you that I'm a minor and write smut !!!!

you laid in your comfortable bed as you and your best friend natalie played truth or dare, it was a rainy lazy day and you had nothing else to do . you saw this game as a fun activity with your friend , meanwhile natalie saw this as an opportunity to ask you more and more questions that she couldn't normally ask

'truth or dare' she asked, you thought about it before choosing truth, 'mhhh truth', she sat up and giggled, 'okay when did you lose your virginity' her question made you freeze up, the truth is you hadn't lost it yet . 'i haven't lost it yet' you mumbled, she leaned in closer and cocked her head to the side

'what was that?' you sighed and sat up with her, 'i haven't lost it yet okay?' you said as you laid your head between your hands, 'really? I think a pretty girl like you would have lost it by now' her comment made your cheeks hot and your breath unsteady . 'you want me to change that?' she slowly moved close to you, 'wait really? you're not like messing with me?' she nodded and grinned

'i want to, it's normal, I mean I'm your best friend' the thought of her taking your virginity sounded weird to you, but she said it was normal and you trusted her with your life . 'okay nat' you nodded and sighed, you were scared, very scared, but she seemed like she knew what she was doing

she laid you down and crawled on top of you, she straddled your lap and started peppering kisses on your neck, once she got to your mouth she smiled at you before connecting your lips, not only was she taking your virginity but she was also your first kiss

when she slipped her tongue into your mouth the feeling was odd, but at the same time it felt nice, 'nat' you moaned into the kiss, she lifted your skirt and pushed your panties to the side . she went face level with your cunt and kissed your thighs, she ran her tongue up and down your slit, you grabbed into her hair and whimpered, she latched her mouth onto your clit and gently sucked it

you moaned at the feeling and tugged on her hair, she chuckled, she slipped two of her digits in your wet core and your hips bucked . 'mhh nat', she felt you pussy flutter around her fingers, she pumped her digets in and out of you, pushing you closer and closer to the edge

'ahh! nat!' with one finish thrust you came all over her fingers, when you came down from your high she pulled out and licked her fingers clean . she put your panties back in place and crawled up to you, 'how was that?' she asked, 'good' you mumbled, she looked at you in awe as you were completely fucked out

[ultrone]

any way can u write an enemies to lovers w nat (precrash) nat and r hate each other, rest of the yellowjackets are annoyed w them not getting along so they forge an intervention (stick them both in a room and force them to bond) heavy denial about liking each other

𝗕𝗟𝗔𝗖𝗞 𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗥 ★ 𝖿𝗋𝗂𝖾𝗇𝖽𝗌 𝗍𝗈 𝖾𝗇𝖾𝗆𝗂𝖾𝗌 𝗍𝗈 𝗉𝗋𝖾-𝗅𝗈𝗏𝖾𝗋𝗌 𝖾𝖽𝗂𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇

cw. fighting, smoking weed.

wc. 3.2k

n/a. tysm for the request, i hope u like it :) and sorry abt the delay, it took me a while to come up with the beef between them 😭

You tried to forcefully jiggle the door open, but despite your efforts, it remained stubbornly closed.

Nat let out a frustrated sigh and spoke up, "Just stop, it's not gonna work." She said, watching you from the corner of the room.

You turned to her, frowning, and sat on the floor with crossed legs, a few feet away from her.

You should’ve known this was going to happen.

“Give it back you asshole!” Nat exclaimed, annoyance evident in her voice as she reached out for your hand. It held a small bag you had taken from her just moments ago.

“Dude, we’ve got practice in an hour, get your shit together,” you retorted, withdrawing your hand and using the other to push her away.

“I just wanna have a fucking smoke,” she argued, “It’s not that big of a deal. Don’t be a moron,” she said, her anger palpable.

“What is going on with you two?” Jackie intervened, clearly annoyed and confused.

“Just the usual, Y/n’s being a fucking dick,” Nat complained.

“I’m not.” You rolled your eyes, turning to Jackie, “Jackie, could you please tell Nat to be responsible for once in her fucking life and go od after practice? Not before.” You complained to her.

"Fuck you!" Nat exclaimed, shoving you on the shoulder.

"No, fuck you!" you shot back, pushing her in return.

Before you knew it, the two of you were engaged in a childish fight until Jackie and Tai intervened, separating the both of you.

"I don't know what the hell’s been going on between you two, but you need to stop. Right now." Tai said, her tone firm and assured.

"Yeah, this behaviour is starting to affect the team," Jackie added. "Everyone's noticed, even the coach. So cut it out. Consider this your final warning."

"You know what? Fuck it." Nat said, walking past Tai. She turned to face you and pointed at your chest. "And fuck you," she said, before finally leaving.

You shrugged, letting out a stressed sigh, and shook your head in disagreement as you walked out of the room behind her.

Little did you know that the whole team was plotting against you, scheming to trap you and Nat in the gym’s backroom. They played you like fools, telling each of you to grab more soccer balls. Nat fell for it first and slipped away without you even noticing. By the time you entered the room and noticed her holding two soccer balls in her arms, someone had already locked the door behind you, leaving you both stuck inside.

Time crawled by, only ten minutes passing, yet it felt like an eternity. Stranded in that room, both of you had stupidly left your phones outside. There was nothing in that cramped space to distract you except each other, and well, that wasn't even an option at this point. So, you were left alone with your own thoughts, and let me tell you, it wasn't a pleasant experience.

Your eyes kept darting around the room, desperate to avoid making eye contact with Nat. You shifted your position, uncrossing your legs and propping them up in front of you, knees bent. Without even realizing it, you began tapping your foot up and down, making the sole of your shoe smack against the floor.

"Can you stop that?" Nat snapped, clearly annoyed by your restless behavior.

You stopped your foot's movements, but you didn't bother to respond. An eye roll was all she got from you.

In an attempt to get comfortable, Nat got up and rummaged through a box filled with brand new, unworn Yellowjackets sweaters. She grabbed one, went back to her spot, and laid down on her back, using the sweater as a makeshift pillow. With one forearm covering her eyes, shielding them from the dim light, she rested her other hand on her stomach.

A few more minutes passed, in complete silence.

Wait a minute, you thought, a realization hitting you like a lightning bolt. Your hands instinctively shot towards your left pocket, and a wave of relief washed over you as you felt the familiar presence. No fucking way. Thank god. Hastily, you slipped your hand into your pocket, retrieving the small bag of weed and rolling paper that you had swiped from Nat during your argument earlier today. And as luck would have it, you always carried a lighter with you, just in case of an "emergency." You were damn well prepared.

Wasting no time, you excitedly cracked open the bag, readying your supplies with lightning speed. You skillfully rolled up a joint in a matter of seconds. Once you were finished, you placed it between your lips, holding it firmly, and with a flick of your thumb, the little flame on the lighter sprang to life. Bringing the flame close to the joint, you lit it up, shielding it with your other hand to ensure a perfect burn.

Interrupted by the all-too-familiar sound, Nat sluggishly shifted her forearm away from her eyes. As her gaze adjusted to the light, she turned to you, her eyes widening in disbelief.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” She blurted out, incredulous, sitting up abruptly. "Is that my stash?" she questioned, her tone a mix of surprise and accusation.

"Indeed it is," you responded, taking a deep drag from the joint. As you exhaled a cloud of smoke, Nat continued to stare at you, her expression transitioning from disbelief to annoyance.

"What?" you asked casually, relishing in the playful taunting. "I mean, it's not like we're going to practice today, right?"

"I can't fucking believe you," she muttered, disbelief and amusement evident in her voice as she let out a chuckle.

Extending your arm, you offered her the joint, a mischievous glint in your eyes. For a moment, she hesitated, but let's face it, there was nothing else to do in that stuffy room, and she was starting to go crazy. Besides, she had been craving a smoke ever since you snatched her stash earlier, so why not indulge?

Nat stood up from her spot and made her way toward you. As she lowered herself to sit down, just a few inches away from you, she reached out and took the joint from your fingers. Inhaling deeply, she mirrored your sitting position, her arm resting on her knee as she brought the joint close to her mouth for another drag.

The two of you remained in a comfortable silence, sharing the joint between you, the smoke weaving its way through the air. Eventually, Nat broke the silence.

"I didn't know you smoked," she remarked, her curiosity evident in her tone.

"Well, there's a lot you don't know about me," you replied cryptically.

Nat's expression turned serious, but a hint of amusement flickered in her eyes. "Well, I do know you're an asshole," she asserted, maintaining a deadpan face.

A playful grin tugged at your lips as you matched her tone. "You think you're funny, huh?" you retorted.

"Hey, it's the truth," she said, a touch of seriousness creeping into her voice. But you brushed it off, choosing to ignore her comment for now.

"Can I ask why?" Nat inquired, breaking the silence once more.

"Why what?" you replied, feigning ignorance, though you knew exactly what she was referring to.

"Why have you been acting like this?" she pressed. "One day we were cool, and then suddenly you turned into a total dickhead."

“You're a pain in my ass too, y’know?" you retorted, feeling the need to defend yourself.

"But I am because you are," she shot back, her argument strong.

You let out a sigh, feeling the weight of the question hanging in the air. Slowly, you brought the joint to your lips once again, taking a deliberate drag before exhaling, the smoke dissipating into the room. Your eyes fixed on the wall ahead, lost in thought.

"You really don't know, do you?" you murmured, the words almost escaping as a whisper.

Nat turned to look at you, her brows furrowing and her gaze filled with confusion, searching for answers.

You couldn't help but chuckle, a nervous yet affectionate sound escaping your lips, as you deliberately avoided meeting her gaze.

“It’s stupid,” you said with a sigh, “Now that I think about it, it wasn’t even your fault.”

“What is it?” she asked, her confusion evident.

Nat and you used to be good friends. While you weren't particularly close during school hours, barely acknowledging each other as you passed in the hallways with a simple nod, you were close enough to hang out after practice pretty much every day. You both would head to the parking lot and lie down on the trunk of Nat's car. There, you would gaze at the sky as it gradually darkened, listening to music, either talking or simply revelling in the comforting silence. It sort of became your thing, a little secret that held great importance to you.

However, as time went on and your conversations deepened, you couldn't help but develop feelings for her. You would eagerly await the end of practice just to see her again, to enjoy the privacy of each other's company.

But then, you stopped showing up.

"Do you remember that day when Shauna kicked the ball so hard that it hit Van directly in the face and gave her a concussion?" you asked her.

"Yeah, of course I do," she replied with a chuckle, recalling the incident vividly. "And we had to call an ambulance and ended up leaving practice half an hour early."

You chuckled along. "Exactly. And had planned to meet at our spot, but I told you I needed to grab something from my locker. So, you said you'd wait for me there."

She nodded, her brow furrowing as she tried to piece the puzzle together. "Yeah, and then you never showed up. Not that day or any day after."

You nodded, feeling a bit guilty. "Well, I did go to my locker to get something, but that's beside the point," you began, your voice tinged with regret. "The thing is, as I walked back to the parking lot and opened the building door to step outside, I could see your car perfectly. You weren't lying on the trunk as we always did though. Instead, you were standing beside it, with your back turned to me," you explained, "And as I approached, I realized that you weren't alone."

Nat's face shifted from confusion to realization, but she remained silent, giving you space to explain.

"As I got closer, I saw the guy leaning in," you continued, furrowing your eyebrows as you recalled the memory. "And then you kissed." The words hung heavy in the air as you conveyed the pain and disappointment you had felt at that moment. "I didn't want to interrupt or cause a scene, so I turned around and walked away. Seeing you with someone else, especially after realizing my own feelings for you, was more than I could handle."

You paused, letting the weight of your words settle between you. "I didn't have the courage to confront you about it then, and I thought it would be easier to distance myself instead. But it wasn't your fault. I guess I was just angry because I wanted to be with you so badly but I couldn’t have you, so I started acting like an asshole. I'm sorry," you said, your voice filled with genuine remorse. Your gaze remained fixed on the floor, unable to meet her eyes. Embarrassment weighed heavily on you.

Nat let out a frustrated sigh, running her fingers through her hair in a stressed gesture. "Damn it, Y/n," she sighed. "I had no idea," she admitted, her voice tinged with surprise and frustration. "The guy you saw me with was Kevyn," She started explaining, "As I was walking to my car, we happened to cross paths, and he said he needed to talk to me about something. We started walking together towards my car, and long story short, he confessed his feelings for me and then kissed me. I was completely caught off guard, so it took me a few seconds to react, but I pushed him away. I guess you didn't see that part," she said, her voice tinged with frustration. "I rejected him right away, Y/n. I told him that I had feelings for someone else, and he apologized for kissing me like that and left."

You listened, your heart sinking with every word she spoke. The truth unfolded before you, and you realized how mistaken you had been.

"I waited for you," Nat continued, her voice laced with a touch of sadness. "I waited for an hour, then two, but you never showed up. I thought something might have happened, but you didn't respond to any of my texts, and I got worried." She paused, her expression reflecting the hurt she had felt. "The next day, I saw you at practice, and I felt relieved, thinking everything was okay. But you wouldn't even look at me. And then, you didn't show up at our spot either."

She took a deep breath. "I thought you didn't want to be my friend anymore or something, I don’t know. I got really upset and wanted to talk to you about it, but then you started acting like an asshole. So, I got mad and started acting like that as well. But I never understood why. I guess I just went along with it."

Nat's voice softened, revealing the depth of her emotions. "I started hating you so much because you were the only person I could truly be myself with. I loved you, Y/n, and then you just left without an explanation."

As she poured her heart out, you finally looked up, meeting her gaze. The raw emotions in her eyes mirrored your own.

Tears welled up in your eyes, "I'm so sorry, Nat," you whispered, "I misunderstood everything, I’m so dumb,” A single tear escaped your eye, rolling down your cheek.

Nat's expression softened further, her eyes filled with understanding. "It's alright, Y/n," she reassured you, her voice gentle and soothing. "I had no idea that you saw me with Kevyn, and I never meant to hurt you." With a gentle touch, she used her thumb to wipe away the tears from your cheeks.

"I missed you so much," you confessed, your gaze locked with hers.

A small, affectionate smile graced Nat's lips. "I missed you too, you dumbass," she replied, the gentle teasing highlighting the warmth in her voice.

You extended your arms and pulled her into a tight hug. She reciprocated it, her arms wrapping around you, and her fingers caressed your hair soothingly.

The two of you remained locked in the embrace for a moment, finding solace and comfort in each other's arms. However, the sound of someone fumbling with the lock on the door shattered the tranquility, jolting both of you back to reality. Instinctively, you pulled away from each other, your hearts racing.

"Shit! The stash!" Nat exclaimed in a whisper, a sudden realization dawning upon her. She swiftly moved and positioned herself on top of it, acting on reflex to conceal it from view.

Just as you both scrambled to compose yourselves, the door swung open, revealing Misty standing in the doorway.

As she stepped into the room, she started rambling, divulging how she had overheard a conversation between Tai, Jackie, and Van, who planned to lock the both of you up in the gym's backroom. Misty, in her usual saviour complex fashion, sprung into action, determined to rescue you from such a predicament. She told you to make your exit discreetly through the back, ensuring that the girls wouldn't catch sight of you leaving. Grateful for her intervention, you and Nat thanked her.

However, Misty seemed to be in a talkative mood, wanting to continue the conversation, until Nat, with her characteristic straightforwardness, couldn't help but say, “Okay, Misty, we get it.” She said, her tone laced with annoyance. “Thanks again for your help. See you later.”

Understanding the hint, Misty finally caught on and nodded, her enthusiasm momentarily dampened. "Sure thing," she replied, slightly deflated. "Take care, you two. See you around."

With that, Misty left the room, leaving the two of you alone once again.

"You're so rude to her," you playfully remarked, nudging Nat with your elbow and letting out a light chuckle as the both of you stood up, ready to leave the room.

Nat shrugged, a mischievous glint in her eyes. "Can't help it," she replied, reaching down to grab her stash and rising to her feet. Then, she turned to you, her gaze softening. "Hey," she called, her voice tinged with shyness. "Would you want to come with me? Like, to the trunk. You know, to catch up and stuff."

A smile spread across your face, accompanied by a gentle blush. "That'd be awesome," you responded, excitement lacing your voice. "But before we head there, can you come to my locker with me?"

"Of course I will," Nat agreed, her tone filled with assurance. "Wouldn't want you slipping away again, not on my watch," she added jokingly.

You chuckled sarcastically, unable to resist teasing her in return. "Ha, you know what should be on your watch though? That big-ass green stain on your butt." A mischievous smirk adorned your face.

Nat's eyes widened, and she quickly spun around to inspect her shorts, discovering the noticeable stain caused by sitting on top of the stash. Feeling a twinge of embarrassment, she hastily patted her shorts, trying to remove the stain as best as she could. "Shut up," she mumbled, a slight blush coloring her cheeks. "Let's go," she said, taking the lead and walking out of the room. You followed closely behind her, a content smile playing on your lips.

As you both stood by your locker, Nat stood beside you, watching curiously as you opened the lock. With a few swift movements, you arranged some items and retrieved a small box that had been carefully hidden in the back.

You retrieved the box and handed it to Nat, who looked at you with confusion and intrigue. "What's this?" she asked, her voice laced with curiosity as she opened it.

"This is what I was getting from my locker that day," you revealed, "About a week before that, I remember we were listening to the radio together, and 'Black Star' by Radiohead started playing. You mentioned how much you loved that song. So, when I got home, I decided to make you a mixtape with songs I like that have a similar vibe."

You watched as Nat's eyes widened, the realization dawning upon her. "You made me a mixtape?" she asked surprised, her fingers brushing against the cassette tape inside.

You nodded, a small smile playing on your lips. "Yes, I did. But, obviously, I didn't give it to you back then because of everything that happened," you continued, "But I've held onto it all this time, just in case."

Her gaze met yours, and you could see the fondness reflected in her eyes. "This is so dope," she exclaimed, a hint of a smile tugging at the corners of her lips. “Thank you, Y/n."

Another smile spread across your face at her words. "You're welcome," you replied. "Now, let's go to your car so we can listen to it together." Without hesitation, you gently took her hand, intertwining your fingers, and led the way toward the exit, making your way to her trunk.

[wlwxreader]

Not a Crush

not my gif

Jackie Taylor x fem!reader

Summary: despite what the entire team thinks, Jackie doesn’t have a crush on you. So why does it make her skin crawl when she sees a guy trying to flirt with you?

Warning(s): jealous!Jackie, possessive!Jackie, oblivious!reader, pre-crash!Jackie, Nat being a little shit, simp!Jackie

Word count: 2.6k

Masterlist: tba

No matter how much the team teased her about it, Jackie Taylor did not have a crush on you.

Did she like your soft smile? Yes. Could she spend days on end listening to a recording of your cheerful and sweet laugh? Why, of course. Did her heart stop whenever you looked at her a second too long? Maybe, but it was only because she thought you were beautiful —in a platonic way.

She did not like you. She didn’t think of you every night before she went to bed. Nope. Not at all. And Nat could shove her own words up her ass, because she sure as hell wasn’t a simp for you.

Yeah, as if.

“Hey,” you waved your hand in the air as you walked towards the field. You had just changed into your football uniform, and looked around. “Is everyone ready for practice?”

“Yeah,” Nat said, stretching her arms. “We were waiting for you for like, I don’t know, ten minutes.”

“You’re the last one. You know what that means,” Van smirked at you, and if it wasn’t for Tai’s presence next to them, you would have walked over to smack them in the face.

“Gotta run for ten minutes around the field,” Lottie said in a singsong voice. You narrowed your eyes at her.

“I’m gonna get you, Matthews,” you threatened with mock anger.

“What’s going on?” Jackie, who had been talking to coach Ben about something, asked. Her smile grew a little bigger when she noticed you within the other team players, and you swear you heard Nat and Shauna giggle to each other.

“Y/N was last,” Nat said. “She has to run for ten minutes.”

“Okay, fine—”

“That won’t be necessary,” Jackie said. Her voice, always soft and bright, was commanding. She wasn’t the Jackie who played around anymore, she was captain Jackie, and everyone in the team knew it.

“What?�� Van asked, offended. They looked between the both of you, mouth ajar. “That’s not fair! It’s a tradition you started, Jackie. Last one has in the field during practice has to run while the others train. Y/N was the last one today.”

“Enough, Palmer,” Jackie gave them a stern look. “Y/N was late because of me.”

You gave her a surprised look, taken aback by her lie. You should not have been bewildered, though— Jackie always had your back no matter what, using her easy charm to cover up for your slip-ups

“Making out before practice?” Nat asked, crossing her arms in front of her chest.

Jackie’s cheeks turned a bright red color, but she didn’t dare to look at you. Instead, she clapped her hands together a few times, and everyone around sobered up.

“Divide yourself into two teams,” Jackie raised her voice. “Whoever team wins, gets to rest while the others run a lap.”

Everyone groaned, looking around to start to form the groups, trying to be as equitative as possible.

“Shauna, you’re captain of team green. Team blue is my team,” Jackie called, and the brown eyed woman nodded, wasting no time to craft the perfect team in her mind as she looked at everyone in the field.

“Okay, cool—”

“Y/N,” Jackie interrupted her best friend. “You’re on my team.”

“And in her heart,” whispered Nat.

Thankfully, neither Jackie nor you hear it.

If Jackie did not like you, she obviously also didn’t feel any ownership over you. She wasn’t jealous, she wasn’t possessive; there was no point in being those things, as you were both just two good friends.

But sometimes, someone would walk up to you and Jackie forgot her inner mantra, throwing it out the window of her mind. The person would smirk and lean in close, feigning they could not hear what you were saying, and Jackie would feel something dark and uncomfortable burning inside of her.

Sure, you weren’t hers, but that didn’t mean anyone had the right to talk to you, so obviously trying to flirt it was painful to observe.

They didn’t have the right because— because— well, because she said so.

“Hey, Y/N,” Jackie said, walking up to your locker. 

Her voice was high-pitched, and you turned to look at her. Anyone else would have thought nothing of her tone, but you knew her; it was the same voice she used when she wanted to be rude but knew she couldn’t.

“Hi, Jackie,” you said, completely forgetting about the man who was talking to you about the chemistry test you both had next week.

Jackie walked with purpose, and she stood in front of you. She wrapped her arm around your shoulders, pulling you into her body. You sighed in relief; it was starting to get cold, and her warmth was welcomed.

The woman smiled when you rested your head on her shoulder, and big green eyes twinkling as she started the man down.

“What were you talking about?” she asked, even though she wasn’t interested in the least. She knew how men were— she suffered their unwanted advances on the daily. It was all an act to get you on their bed.

“Oh,” the man said, clearing his throat. “We were discussing the next chemistry exam—”

“Well, I hope you study hard. Bye.”

You barely had time to close your locker before Jackie was pulling you away from that man.

“Hey— Jackie,” you complained, pulling your books closer to your chest. “What was that for?”

“That boy is a womanizer,” Jackie said through gritted teeth. “He just wanted to get in your panties.”

“You think?” you asked, turning slightly to look at the boy, who was leaning against your locker and staring at you. When he saw you looking back, he smirked and waved. “I think he just wants help studying.”

“You’re too naïve,” the blonde said. “He has tried that same trick with half the school.”

“Really?” you whispered conspicuously. “I thought he was just being friendly.”

Jackie shook her head, leaning in to kiss the side of your head. Her arm was still around you, and it made you walk awkwardly. You still didn’t complain.

“Boys are never friendly just because, Y/N,” she said. “They only got one thing on their mind.”

“Kissing?” you raised an eyebrow at her.

Jackie’s laugh could be heard all around the halls, a melodic sound that carried you out of the building.

“Every year it gets colder earlier,” you complained, shivering slightly.

“Are you cold?” Jackie asked, finally pulling away. You almost moaned in complain at the lack of warmth on your side, but before you could voice your discomfort, a weight was placed on your shoulders.

You looked to your side to see Jackie’s team letterman jacket resting over you. You smiled, putting your books in one hand to put the sleeve on.

“Thank you,” you said, with genuine gratitude. Jackie shook her head, simply reaching over to grab your books so you fully put on the jacket.

“Wanna hang out in the field?” she asked. Once you had the jacket on, she wrapped her arm around your shoulders again, because she wanted to but most importantly, because she could.

“The one time we don’t have to train, and you still wanna go over there,” you rolled your eyes, but followed her steps when she changed course.

She laughed again, turning to look at you. With bright big eyes, and lips pulled into a tight smile, you thought no one would ever be as pretty as she was.

As you walked, Jackie peaked behind you and saw the same man, looking over with frowned eyes. As she heard you talking about your day, she raised her arm enough for everyone to see the back of your jacket, where Taylor stood proudly over her team number.

She’s wearing my jacket, not yours. Dipshit.

To say she was ecstatic at his scolf was an understatement.

Yeah, she thought, let everyone know she only wears my number. Let everyone know she’s mine.

That time, she didn’t try to correct herself.

“I think Jackie has a crush on me.”

Van, who was tying up their cleats, stopped suddenly.

“Uh?” they asked, blinking a few times.

“I—” you cleared your throat, your cheeks suddenly turning red. “I think she might like like me.”

“Oh, shit,” Van said, rubbing their face.

“Did— did I say something wrong?”

“Yes!” Van let go of the laces, irritated. “You weren’t supposed to find out until November. You just lost me ten bucks!” they groaned. “Thanks, buddy.”

“What?” you gave them a puzzling look. “Wait— you have bet on me?”

“No,” Van waved their hands around. “Not on you. On your inability to see what’s happening right in front of your face, to be exact.”

“Okay, rude,” you said. “I’m not that oblivious.”

“Oh, no. Of course not,” Van said. Their tone was laced with sarcasm. “You joined the team two years ago, and only now you have realized.”

“Wait, she has liked me for two years?” you asked in a whisper.

“Duh,” Van gave you a long look. “Jesus, you’re a lost cause.”

“Screw you.”

“What made you realize?” Van asked, with genuine curiosity. They put their feet back down on the ground, leaning over the bench to look at you.

“She, um—” you looked around, making sure no one else was in the changing room. Feeling guilty over spilling such deep secrets, you moved over and sat down next to Van, so no one else would hear. “She kind of lied, the other day. So I wouldn’t have to run around the field.”

“She always lies,” Van scoffed.

“Jackie never lies,” you said, firmly. You gave the redhead a look, one that would have been threatening if it wasn’t coming from you. “She’s an honest person.”

Van chuckled. “She will lie to save your ass,” they said. “Because she’s the fattest crush on you.”

“Fuck,” you whispered.

After practice a week later, instead of going back to the changing room with the rest of the team, you grabbed Jackie and pulled at her hand, forcing her to move toward the bleachers. She went willingly, allowing you to take her wherever it was that you wanted her to be.

She would walk through fire if it meant holding your hand.

In a platonic way, of course.

“Jackie,” you said in a serious tone. You took a deep breath, and stared into big green eyes who looked back with passion. “We need to talk.”

She frowned her eyebrows, quickly picking up on your mood swing. “What’s wrong?” she asked, moving closer.

Jackie’s hand rested on your waist when she saw you starting to pull away. She hated it; hated whenever there was distance between the two of you. She wanted you close to her always, holding your hand and laughing with you.

“I think— I think you might be interested in someone.”

Jackie gave you a puzzling look. Her, being into someone? Not a chance.

“What are you talking about, Y/N?” She asked, as confused as she has ever been.

“Don’t make me say it, please,” you moaned, like a petulant toddler. “This is embarrassing.”

“Well, I can’t read your mind, can I?”

You looked away from her, incapable of looking into her eyes as you spoke.

“I think I might like someone, too.”

Jackie froze at your words. Her jaw dropped, eyes open so wide it looked like they might jump out of their sockets.

“You…” she gave a bewildered look. “You like someone?”

You nodded, and her hand tightened on your waist, as if she needed some support to keep her from falling over.

“This can’t be happening,” she whispered, closing her eyes. You gave her a concerned look.

“Jackie—”

“Is it that boy from the locker? The one who kept trying to flirt with you?”

“No. It’s—” you cleared your throat. “It’s not a boy.”

“Oh, no,” Jackie blinked away the white spots that were starting to form on her vision. “Nat? Tai? Or—” she gasped, looking at you accusingly. “Don’t tell me it’s Shauna.”

“Why would it be— No! It’s not Shauna.”

“It’s not?” she gave you a look. “Thank god.”

“It’s you,” you whispered.

“Me?” Jackie asked, trying to make sure she had heard you properly. “You like me. Me.”

“Yeah. I like you, Jackie.”

She leaned in close to you, looking at your lips. You closed your eyes, preparing yourself for her kiss. Instead, you felt her weight over you, literally on you.

“Jackie? Oh my god!”

Safe to say, it took the Yellowjackets over a month to get over the little spectacle you and coach Ben had pulled off when Jackie fainted.

You had wanted to keep it a secret, of course— Class Queen and captain of the football team, fainting because a girl had confessed their feelings to her? The rumor would be too juicy. But you also couldn’t control yourself when Jackie fell on top of you, eyes closed and mouth open, and it took you approximately ten seconds to take all the information in before you were screaming for help.

The help came in the form of Ben, who had come over running. He frantically looked at the team captain, laying on the grass as you fanned her with your hand, and he ran back inside to get Bill’s help.

It didn’t take long for the girls to come out of the changing room, and soon enough they pulled the pieces together; your conversation with Van they had told the entire team (which had led to Tai waving around fifteen ten dollar bills around the showers), your nervous attitude over practice, the tension they had felt before they left the two of you alone…

“Holy shit,” Nat said, smirking as you tried to wake Jackie up. “She fainted. She actually fainted.”

The story soon spread, faster and more explosive than gunpowder around fire. Soon enough, Jackie Taylor’s untaintable reputation got washed away by the new knowledge that she was a hopeless romantic.

Two months later, people would still whisper about Jackie whenever she walked down the corridors of Wiskayok High School.

“You think you will still be Class Queen after… what happened?” you asked, taking notice of how many students were staring at the two of you.

“Of course,” she smiled that charming smile you loved so much. “I’m Jackie Taylor, baby. This highschool would be nothing without me.”

“You’re too full of it,” you rolled your eyes.

She wrapped her arm around your waist, pulling you in close to her. She kissed your cheek, smiling.

“It doesn’t bother you?” you asked once you reached your locker. “Y’know, everyone still talking about it?”

“Let them talk. They aren’t mean, anyways,” Jackie said, raising her shoulders. You gave her a look; she would never notice just how many people thought ill of her. She thought too kindly of the world, but that made it two of you. “As long as it makes them talk about how you’re my girlfriend, I don’t care.”

You put the books you no longer needed back into your locker, and once you closed it, she pressed you against it.

When her lips pressed against yours, you stopped worrying about the whispers and the teasing from the team; Jackie was right.

Let them talk.

[happysparklingshadows]

A Certain Hunger (4/?)

Chapter 3 ✿ Chapter 5

Summary: It's been a few weeks in this cabin, and thinking about being saved is getting a little bit bleak. So, you have a good idea for everyone to find a job to make things easier for your time being in Canada. You pick up a fishing rod, and everyone else picks up the gun to see who will become the hunter. You reconnect with a childhood friend and start to accept your new home.

Pairing: Surviving!Poly! Yellowjackets x reader (slow burn)

Warnings: Smut, HOMOSEXUAL SEXXX, Lowkey controversial entirely written sex scene with a character yall wouldn't guess lol, Lowkey mean reader, Depiction of a terminal illness and death of a mother, 90s setting with the views of the time, homophobia and internal homophobia, Homophobic slurs, Alcohol/drug use, gore and blood, depictions of mental health, depictions of death, 90s slang is used (411 means giving the tea or details of a situation to someone).

Taglist: @zhivaxo @h-doodles @homopheli @bigtimesalt8196 @juniperjean @scatorccioz @juniperjean @yaakooi @lottieswebs @juchily @freezinggay @deathly710-blog @ghostoflesbianism @marvelous-wandanatangel @errriiie @anskkks @deathvidal @slutforhotpeople @thursdayygrrrl @day-ziez @evewasheretoday @mayasaurusss @captainbabybear @eleanormall @mommyeater2000 @leonchef @mikititta @tigersarrcool @nyasbae @dykepvppy @jax1118 @oakwave @mmiah @dvrkhcld @swiftin0f @opheliadeservedbetter-27 @psychicdreamwonderland @pinkmoonzzz @under-your-bed-not-in-it @sadsapphic-rose @fictitious-sapphic

Word count: 13.4k

Notes: I want to apologize for my hiatus, but it was for good reason. I needed to care for my father, who got very sick around September last year when I was going to write the 4th chapter, and he has since been better. Sadly, I lost my motivation, but I have detailed notes for the following 8 chapters, and I will be trying to finish seasons 1 and two of the story as soon as I can before the third season airs! This year, for NANOWRIMO, I have decided to write for this story and see how far I can go within the next month or two. Thank you to everyone who was so kind and understanding about my disappearance and still loves my story!

“(Y/n), what the fuck is a ratio?” Jackie whispers to you loud enough for Shauna to hear beside you in a lull in math class. Mrs. Goldberg had to leave the class for some reason, you don’t remember why. You smile over at Jackie with her lovely brown eyes and take a good look at her. She’s as beautiful as you remember.  

You chuckle as you look into your notes and say, “From what Mrs. Goldmen wrote, an ordered pair of numbers a and b, written a / b where b does not equal 0.” You read from your notes as Shauna and Jackie looked blankly up at you from the obtuse definition. You laugh with them, “Whatever the fuck that means!” 

Jackie and Shauna laugh with you, but Jackie groans in frustration at the last question. 

Taissa, behind you, leans forward and smiles, “What’s wrong?” 

Jackie turns dramatically to Taissa as she pulls her paper over to Taissa; she just wants the answer now. You look at Jackie moving around as Van pulls your attention with a hand on your shoulder. 

“Hey, (y/n), can you help me with the first question? Jackie stole my answer key.” She joked as you turned to help her. 

You giggle at her joke as you look down at the paper. 

It was blank. 

There weren’t even questions printed onto the page like you thought. You looked at your paper again, flipping it around but finding that it had nothing written on it either. It didn’t have the answers you thought you were writing on it.

You furrow your brows as you look up to Van, but the redhead isn’t there. Neither were the others. A chill runs down your spine as you start to remember. 

The door of your old math teacher's class slams open, causing you to squeal and jump from your desk. That then was the only desk in the room. It was as if when your eyes looked away from something, it disappeared. 

Mrs. Goldmen looks at you with a sad, sympathetic smile as she leads you to the hallway; you don’t have any control at the moment as your legs walk you down the hallway with her. Mrs. Goldmen's hand is on your shoulder as she says words that have been etched into the gray matter of your brain. “Honey, your mother has gone to the hospital, and your father is here to pick you up.” 

You remember this. This was the day your mother’s health got so much worse. The day you became her caretaker. 

Fat tears run down your eyes as you walk to the office door. Mrs. Goldman disappears when her hand leaves your shoulder. You look around for her; the hallways of your old high school are empty, and liminal darkness creeps in the corners of the walls. You felt an urge to go into the office. 

You held the cold handle and turned the knob to the left to open the office door. 

It wasn’t right. 

You are met with the darkness of the woods, which has claimed you as its own. You turn, and the hallways no longer protect you from the cold forest. You scream as you are surrounded by woods again; the door stands alone with its hinges.  

 You feel the ripe cold air coming up your legs and arms; you hug yourself. 

Howls from the trees start to chant above you. Every corner was a howl from a freakish, unnatural octave, and you started to feel the snow melt under your toes and the nip of the winter bite at the skin of your arms. Unbearable and cutting is how it felt—hunger in the air. 

You look down at yourself and see something that drops your heart. 

The gold heart necklace from Jackie’s Sweet 16. 

You don’t think before you run. You run straight and away from trees as the howls follow you. Helpless as sticks and bushes stopped you as you rushed through the 4ft of snow. 

You sob and run, knowing you are coming to an end. You are going to die. You should just stay still and watch with open eyes as they slice your throat, shoot you with an arrow, or stab you with a spear. So why would you run? 

But you ran anyway. 

Raw, cold toes feel the crunching of the snow. Twigs tickle between your toes and scratch when you lift your feet. 

You don’t hear anything anymore. You are in the heart of the woods; the tree watches you as you finally fall onto a mound of snow. Nothing makes any sense. You cry and feel yourself shake with adrenaline; you need to keep going. 

A chanting comes to your ears. You freeze in the moment; you hear yourself. 

You crawl towards the song, French humming and chanting from a distance. 

Over the hill, you see yourself dressed in your old headdress, the pink stain furs of a white rabbit made into a cloak with the head of a doe adorn on the top. You circle the campfire that cooks the meat; the others dressed in their cloaks watch with stabbing eyes. 

The queen in the center watches a younger you dance around the fire. The Antler queen nods her head and looks around the circle. 

You watch yourself take a satisfying bite of the fatty meat from the pan that cooked the chunks. The others immediately rush to the pan and take their share of the meat. The grease shines on your satisfied smirk on the younger self, bubbling in your stomach. “Wake up, " you blurt out to yourself in a panic. 

You gag as your eyes fill with tears. 

No. 

No. You don’t want to remember this. 

This wasn’t even the worst of it. 

Stop. 

Wake up (y/n) wake up wake up wake up wake up-

‘21

You wake up violently from your dream. You feel yourself lean harder onto the surface you were on and feel a darting pain from a rod in your neck. You gasp as you look around, realizing you weren’t in your house again. 

The tree whispers to you again. You know it. 

You stand in the wooded area behind your home. It was always comforting to hide in the trees and smell the sun's sweet earth, playing pirates or whispering about boys you never liked with Shauna and Jackie. This was your hideout as a child. You played fox and hounds and painted nails as you watched the sunset. You hate it now. It screams at you, and it itches your skin to be surrounded again; you need a little distance. Your breath is short again. 

Your hands cling to the tree behind you, and you feel something in your hand: your pocket knife. You turn around to look at what you have done again. You stare back at the symbol. Even when you dream, you seem to find a way to protect yourself, even a little bit. 

You put the knife in your nightgown pocket. And you backed away. Slowly accepting the fact that this is something you will never stop doing, no matter the pills, sleep therapy, or drinking, can make you stop sleepwalking to the trees when you think about them. It follows closely behind, no matter the distance. 

Fucking Shauna. 

When you went to her house last night, you weren’t planning on sleeping with her.

You were sitting at her island drinking coffee like you usually do. Ever since you returned from New York to Wiskayok, you reconnected with Shauna because of the brunches with Jackie's parents. You have been coming over for coffee to talk about your lives like regular people. It was refreshing to look at Shauna and see an adult woman instead of the girl you grew up with and survived with. Not seeing Shauna was especially hard after coming home from the wilderness because you were the closest to her before the crash, even before you knew who you were. You still don’t know who you are without her in some ways. 

You both talk about the upcoming brunch, how you'll get a rabbit as a present, and how Jackie’s parents will talk down to you like they always do. But as the conversation continues, Shauna confesses that she and Jeff are in a deep dry spell. They haven’t touched each other in a long time, and how Shauna has not been touched in a long time. Then, without even thinking about it, you two start kissing each other. 

Then, something instinctually comes over you as you kiss and touch each other. The planned 40-minute coffee became hours of love-making.

But as soon as the passion ended, you left. You felt satisfied and a little weird from your desperation with Shauna. You get dressed, kiss them goodbye, and return to your lives like it never happened, like it has always worked. You remember feeling so grateful Callie was sleeping over at her friend's house and Jeff was out of the house for the night for some reason. 

When you drove home, all you thought about was your day with Misty and Natalie, Travis killing himself, and making love with Shauna. It was a blast from the past. As you entered your driveway, an intrusive thought came to mind: the image of a pan over an open fire frying chunks of meat.

You shouldn’t have gone to bed thinking about the past. This only happens when the team creeps into your space; they always do that if you give them a chance. 

You thought grumpily as you walked back to your backdoor. Your cat, Ginger, rubs on your legs when you get into your backyard. Your nightgown has mud at the ends, and your feet are dirty; your toenails have dirt under them. 

A black van passes by as you walk into your home. It hisses in the wind as it drives by. You look at it, worried someone will see the dirt on your nightgown and think you are some senile old woman. 

You get back into your home and sigh. Rubbing the ache in the back of your neck, you start a pot of coffee for yourself before you start your day. You needed a moment for yourself before you had to act all day, masking all your quirks and characteristics to seem normal. 

“You don’t think people can notice you’re a little crazy, right?” 

You froze as you put your cup of coffee on the counter. You know that voice. 

“I mean, I love you for how crazy you are, but you have been losing it a lot lately.” Jackie’s voice says behind you. She always stands in her yellowjacket uniform with curled hair; she looks precisely how she should be remembered. “Don’t want you to bite someone on accident.”

“I’ll try not to, Jackie. But you never know; someone might not know not to put their hand so close to my mouth.” You say back at her. You feel your eyes well; she was always so sad to remember even more when you see her. Her phantom has been long accepted and dreaded, but something that no one could stop. You didn’t know if you even would want her spirit to leave you. 

“Well, you should comb your hair and take a bath. You look like death… smell like it too,” Jackie says, and as if she was never there, she was gone. 

You sigh and rub your eyes. You turn back for your coffee and pour sugar inside of it, “It’s too early for this shit.” You mutter to yourself. You can’t get angry at this. It’s your best hallucination, and you couldn’t get mad with Jackie, never with her. You got to leave, but Jackie never got to the chance to live out of the cedar and butterfly weeds. 

‘96

“Lottie, I know it is… fucking weird as shit. But we can’t pass up a house in the woods, okay? I didn’t see any books wrapped in human skin.” You say softly to Lottie as everyone finishes their breakfast of berries and gossip. You rub the stinging at the back of your neck that can’t go away. 

“I know, but it just doesn’t feel right being in the same house as a dead body,” Lottie says back. 

“Well, maybe we can make something for the house to ease, you know, the energies.” 

“Like charms?” 

“Maybe? I have never dealt with this situation, but I trust you can settle the energies here. You are so good at being a peacekeeper.” You say to her and put your hand on her shoulder; you take it off quickly because you still don’t know where you stand with her after last night's kiss. Because you know if the others were to look at you and check if you were gay, you would be quickly exposed. 

“Thank you, (Y/n)...” She says, looking down at her shoes.”Are we okay? I didn’t mean to make things weird. I don’t even know what I was thinking.”

You smile, hiding the hurt, and quickly say, “Oh, my god, yeah, we are, Lottie. I get it. We have been through a lot, and we just wanted some comfort. It’s not a big deal.” 

Lottie chuckles out of relief and pats your arm; she nods. “Okay, good; I didn’t want anything to be weird.” 

“No, nothing is weird, Lottie.” You reassure her as you move yourself away. You want to peel your skin off, and a sudden loneliness surrounds you. 

The morning moves on quickly. Travis sits on the porch with a gun, and you just stare at him as you walk to the campfire in front of the cabin with the angler's box and pole. 

“Okay, everyone! We need to talk plans!” You announce in your loudest voice. Everyone circles the fire and the porch to listen to you; every morning since the crash, you have made an effort to set goals for the day and get through the days until rescue. “Okay, so we’ve been in these woods for ten days. We are low on food but shouldn’t worry too much longer. We now have a fishing line and a working pole with the help of Lottie and Shauna,” You say as you smile at the two. The others do the same, giving little thanks to the two blushing girls. “So, we’re not hopeless right now; anyone who wants to learn how to fish can come with me and see if you want to do that. But does anyone know how to use the rifle?” You ask the group and consider your list of things to speak about today. 

Couch Ben clears his throat and says, “I went hunting with family before, so I can teach people who want to.” 

You nod your head at him and say, “Okay! Everyone should try it out to see who is the best with a gun. We’ve been out here for a little bit, and I am sure we will have to take care of ourselves until they get here-”

Jackie interrupts, “So, we shouldn’t worry about the food because they must be close by now?” 

You look over at her; you know why she is talking. She doesn’t want a job, and she doesn’t want to worry about getting saved. But it has been 11 days since the crash; you don’t want to kill hope. 

“Well, kind of. We should be prepared if it takes them a few more weeks to find us in these woods. Jackie, we’re in the thick of it right now, so it would be better if we all tried to use the gun and see if we can hunt-” 

“Well, are you going to try out the gun?” She asked you with crossed arms and a well-known tone of annoyance. 

You suck your teeth and tilt your head to her, “No, I am going out fishing. I know I am good at it, so I will do that. You can try to see if you are good at hunting. It’s just a tryout.” To end this small conversation, you say, “Okay, so the goal for today is to find some food and learn some skills tonight. Mari, Laura, and Krystal have already volunteered to clean and do the projects we have started at the cabin, alright? Anything else?”. 

No one else had anything to say. You nod as you hold up the fisher pole and say, “I am going to the beach to fish and make a little project. if anyone wants to come with me, you will find me.” You say this as you see that no one will move to fish with you for some reason. You nod and start heading out of the campsite and walking down Natalie's trail to the lake. A few nights ago, Natalie took the time to crave a path to the beach and plane with small crosses on the trees. She wanted everyone to be able to tell where they were in the woods without getting lost.

The days have gone by quickly lately since you all have found the cabin, and it's been getting to you a little bit. You didn't like the feeling of being able to find your way around the woods, even though it was convenient. It still would never replace your home. You missed home, and you can't tell anyone else about it. 

As you walk down the trail deep in thought, the sun hits your eyes through the leaves, it reminds you of your backyard. It’s precisely like where your tree house stands just outside your home, where you can look out the window and see your mother washing dishes. God, you missed your mom. And as of an hour ago, she should have taken her morning medicine and had her legs messaged because she can’t walk around too much. You feel your throat tighten, and your body has a wave of emotional nausea. 

“Hey, Wait up!” Shauna called from behind you on the trail. 

You stop and smile at her, “Hey, Shauna. You coming with me?” you ask. 

“Yeah, I don’t want to touch the gun. I don’t want to kill anything.” 

“I get it. I hate fish, so I like killing them.” You joke to her with the best deadpan voice you can muster. 

Shauna chuckles and shakes her head softly, “You’re a freak, you know that?” 

“Oh yeah? You’re not going to say that when I get a fish.” You cackled. “You can just journal if you want; I am just going to make you help me make a lazy fisherman.” 

“What’s that?” 

“It’s a heavy stick supported with rocks with a hook and line attached. It just catches fish without anyone doing anything. You just raise the line, and hopefully, a fish is hooked.” 

“We have hooks? What was in that box?” 

“Not a lot, but it had a bait hook and a lure for the pole. It had some rusty hooks and oil for the pole. I made some hooks from the pop things on top of the cans.” 

“The tab?”

“Yeah, I kinda cut them and made them like hooks. I’m thinking about making a net while we’re here.” 

“You think we’ll be here long enough for that?” 

“I don’t know; all I know is I will go crazy if I sit still too much. I overthink, you know.” You confess to Shauna as you come across a wide river a little off the trail from the lake. You and Shauna make some marks on the trees to make a path back to the trail. 

After a while, the two of you settle up after making a lazy fisherman. It was easy to be around Shauna. You’ve been sandbox friends, and that kind of love never dies. You mainly talked about school and the annoying people you knew, like Randy. The biggest meathead you’ve ever met. 

“Randy smells like Salmi and is cold to the touch but also is very hot when you stand near him.” You say to Shauna as you cast a line with a little bug at the end. You sit on the river's edge with Shauna sitting against a tree. 

Shauna laughs out loud as she hugs her journal to her chest. And you keep going on your rant. 

“Honestly, girl, If I ever hear him say the words Faggot or Dyke again, to Misty or Kevin or whoever. I’ll write a story about him eating Jeff’s ass and finally getting to feel Jeff’s sweet touch. Because you can’t tell me he isn’t in love with that guy.” You say with a laugh in your tone as you can’t talk straight. It’s ridiculous, but it was so funny to both of you. Shauna is snorting like a pig next to you, making you fall on your back, laughing. 

“What the fuck?!” 

“He thinks about gay people too much to not be gay!” You laugh louder. Both of you laugh until your sides hurt. It felt nice just to be girls for a moment in the woods, and you pretend you were at the back of your house with Shauna. 

It lulls for a moment before Shauna asks, “Randy called Misty a dyke?” 

“Yeah. At the Spring Fling.” You said with a little bit of sadness going through. You felt so bad for Misty in moments like that. “I remember when me, you, and Jackie got there after getting ready seeing Misty-”

“In that big puffy pink dress,” Shauna says, pointing a finger at you. She remembers, and she smirks a little. At the time, unfortunately, you laughed at her dress for being out of date and seemed to be “trying too hard.” 

“Yeah… But Misty was just there and- I mean, I am not going to say Misty is cool or that she isn’t weird. Sometimes, I don’t know if she isn’t an alien, but she isn’t mean or disgusting.” You say as you gently rile in the line. You feel yourself frown a little bit. “She was standing in the corner without a date and any friends, and Randy just comes up to her and calls her an ugly dyke.” You say a little quieter. 

“Oh my god, that is so horrible; why didn’t you tell me the 411?” 

“I mean, I only knew because she cried when I went into the bathroom. I was a shoulder to cry on; I didn’t want to make it a thing if Misty didn’t want to. I wish I could have done something. Fuck Randy.” 

“Fuck Randy!” Shauna agreed. Shauna looks at you fish peacefully as the sound of gunshots rings in the distance. You look over to her and think about the next thing to discuss. 

“So, Jackie is mad at me, isn’t she? Jackie learning how to shoot a gun?” You ask her, point her to talk to you about Jackie. You love Jackie deeply, but she usually causes drama within the trio. 

“Yeah, she is being a bitch lately.” 

“Yeah, I think she has the worst attitude out of everyone, but I can’t be upset that she is trying to come to terms with the crash.” 

“Okay, but she doesn’t have to fight everything you ask her to do. You’re just trying to help everyone.” 

“Thank you. And yeah, I hope she will stop fighting me every step of the way, but we just don’t know how long we’ll be out here, so I just don’t think we should be so argumentative…” You sigh and look at her with wary eyes, “I’ll talk to her. Like I always do. It’ll be okay. We love each other. No fucking gun will get in the way.” 

“You’re right. It’ll be okay. We must be here for each other before we’re rescued.” 

“You're right.” You say as you keep watching your line in the water. Praying for a fish to take a bite

‘21

You smile as your father laughs at the TV. You rub your hands to apply lotion to his shaking ones. You and he were watching “I Love Lucy” because it was his favorite childhood show. 

He doesn’t have fully solid days constantly anymore, and it's the reason you have him in the nursing home. Somedays, he was just like you when you returned from the wilderness. He wouldn’t eat or do anything but watch TV. He would sit in his chair and watch TV; when it was off, he didn’t know where he was anymore. One day, he forgot where the bathroom was in the home he had lived in for 45 years, and he wet himself before you found him in the living room looking in the china cabinet, thinking it was the bathroom. But other days, he was as sharp as nails, playing chess and talking about things from the 70s like it was yesterday. 

You felt your heart drop to your stomach when he was diagnosed with Parkinson’s and early-set dementia, but you were calm. You were now an adult with savings and a career, and you had the means to care for him now. To repay him for him nursing you after you came back. 

You remember the nights he would pet your hair back after you vomited from episodes of PTSD. How he would sit in your bedroom holding you in his lap with tears in his eyes, listening to you scream in his chest. He just sat there with you and let you sob; no words were needed. He just stood there and let you cling like a little girl again. He let you yell at him and berate him as if he were the wilderness himself because he knew you weren’t yelling at him. He knew when to push you forward and when you needed to be held. 

He helped you through the 5 years of healing after you were found. You had a total of 3 surgeries to make your brain's blood vessels normal again. You had to wear a splint on your neck for 1 year. You had to have countless MRIs throughout your life. Countless painful nights as your neck stabbed at you and caused you to feel no comfort. Your dad was always there with you, sitting beside you at every doctor's appointment and every event. He would only sit outside the waiting room for your therapy sessions. 

Your father looks at you with (e/c) eyes and a soft smile, “I’m so happy to see you, peanut.  How is your job?”

“Well, I'm still stuck around the last few chapters of my trilogy, Trying to fight my publisher for more time," you say as you let his shaking hand down and go to his other to lotion them. They were callous and dry. Your father's hard work was shown in his battered hands, which shivered. “You took a shower already?”

“Yeah, I wanted to look nice for you.” He rasps with a chuckle, his wrinkled face still holding his cheeky smile. He had the same soul as he always had, and moments like these make you think of happy memories of being in the woods with him and your mom. 

“Oh, thank you, dad! I was going to say it didn’t smell like a caveman in here.” You chuckle back with him as you finish rubbing the lotion on his other hand. 

“Oh, hush, you!” He slowly pokes your side and cheek, holding a smile. 

“No.” You giggle back at him as you stand up, your hands moving to comb his hair. “Have the nurses been kind to you?”

“Sweethearts. Kirsta, the night shift nurse, is very kind. She comes in here when I sleep and never has a bad attitude.” He said as he leisurely scratches his nose, “Don’t hate the food.” 

“Well, that's good, Dad.” You say as you look down at him. He looked clean and comfortable in his recliner. “I should get going. I need to get a few words down before I go to bed.” 

“Alright, Peanut.” He says and takes you in. He grabs your hand gingerly and says, “I love you. Be safe. Text me when you get home.” 

You chuckle and nod your head. You find it adorable that your father still wants you to tell him whenever you leave him. Even when you lived with him at your grown age, he wanted to know you were safe. “Of course, Dad! Don’t worry.” 

“You better, " he says as he points at you with a shaking finger. He was so cute to you at that moment. You just laugh and nod your head to him. “I will!” you state back with a big smile.

You leave his room and start walking down the hallway of the nursing home. Walking down the halls, you can hear the other residents talking and watching TV.

You hear a ping on your phone and see Shauna texting you again. You sigh as you click on the notification. 

Shauna  Okay so I did something bad.  You  Like what? Did you rear-end someone again? Shauna  No  Shauna Dinner You Omg you went to the dinner? What happened? Shauna Jeff is cheating  Shauna Jeff is cheating on me, and he isn’t trying to fix some fucking data system. I am just so done. Shauna So I went to dinner.  Shauna  And I stayed for dessert.  You  Omg you didn’t Shauna Yep, and I am going to see him again tonight. You  Shit Shauna!  You I mean, get your lick back but don’t go too far. 

As you approached the front of the nursing home, which had a large circle desk for the nurses, you turned on the curve and accidentally tripped over another woman. 

You look at the woman with a smile, which drops for a second because you know her. It was Misty. You didn’t realize she worked here, where your father is, but you quickly perk your lips up again.

“Oh my god, Misty!” 

“(Y/n)! What are you doing here?” 

“Oh, well. My dad has been here for a while, and I am here to visit! I didn’t know we were going to meet again so soon.” 

“I was picking up my Tupperware, which I left yesterday.” She shows you her red-top Tupperware in her oversized purse. “I was going to ask you if you wanted to have Chocolate Martinis at Antonio’s; they are outstanding.” 

You didn’t want to. You have been seeing the team too much again, and you had sex with Shauna last night. You become increasingly like how you used to be when you get around these women. 

“Sure! You wanna pick me up from my house?” You blurt without a second to stop yourself. You wanted to kick yourself, but you couldn’t stop it. 

“Great!” Misty beams with a big smile as you both leave the nursing home. “I’ll tell you about the Travis situation, " she adds as she walks beside you. 

‘96

You and Shauna sat beside the riverbank for a long time, talking about everything and nothing. It didn’t feel like you were doing anything as you and she gossiped about the others in the wilderness. It was relaxing and pleasing. You kept looking down to your now two fishing lines for any signs of fish. The sounds of gunfire going off in the distance, in an odd way, were comforting because you knew where everyone else was while being far away. 

While waiting for the fish, you started talking about school and dances- anything to keep your mind busy. 

“So, after my mom curled my hair and did my makeup, she left me to get my dress on. You remember the one purple one with the ruffles.” 

“Sophmore year homecoming, right?” Shauna asks as she points to you, trying to remember. 

“Yeah, that one. I don’t know if I have ever told you, but the zipper popped open when I put on the dress.” You said with a smile hurting your cheeks as you laughed loudly from your gut at your story. It used to make you cry thinking about that time, but now it is funny. Shauna bubbled in laughter beside you as you continued, “She was yelling at me, crying and sobbing, that I was going to that dance whether I liked it or not. She just started sewing me into the dress.” 

“No fucking way your mom sewed you into a dress!” Shauna laughed with you as she grabbed your arm. Her eyes water with tears as she laughs with you. 

“No, she did! It was the last time I ever got anything from Macy’s.” You giggle as you glance back to the fishing line one more time. 

Shauna began to chuckle softly, her eyes crinkling slightly as she listened to your story. It made her miss everyday life before the crash. "God, homecoming. I wish we were back there instead of this," Shauna motioned to the wilderness around us with a sigh.

"Yeah, same. I would much rather be crying about being fat over this any day." You sign as you lean on Shauna’s shoulder. You try to keep the good vibes that were made, so you smile and nudge her, "But, hey, we have each other, and people are looking for us. They have to be."

Shauna smiled softly as you moved closer to her. She smiled at you, but inside, she wasn't sure if she believed you'd be found. But she didn't want to worry you. "Yeah, of course. Maybe we're already on the news," she added, attempting to sound optimistic.

"Oh yeah, I don't know how people haven't heard about us,” You said quickly after she finished because you believed you were headline news. “ All our families must be doing everything to find us, and they would have known as soon as the plane didn't land." You added a lump in your throat growing as you said families. You thought about your family's reaction and everyone’s family’s reaction to them being missing. You couldn't imagine the fear and worry they must be experiencing, not knowing where you all were. But you tried hard to push those thoughts to the back of your mind, needing to remain strong.

"I'm sure they're out there looking for us. They'll find us," she said, mostly trying to persuade herself and you. 

"They will, and all we have to do is wait until they do." You nudge her again and smile, saying, “Besides, we have good company.”

As you move your head back, you see the lure dramatically dunking into the water. You quickly grab your pole and start to reel in the fish. As ywou start to move, you can feel how heavy the fish is on the other end. 

“Whoa, oh my god, did you catch a fish?” Shauna asks in excitement as she sits up on her knees beside you and looks at the water. 

“Trying to!” You say back as you keep reeling in the fish. 

Suddenly, after struggling with the reel a little bit, you pull up two fish on one hook. You squeal in happiness as you quickly grab the two fish with pride. Shauna squeals with you as you hold the two big fish. 

You and Shauna hug each other happily as you hold the pole up, “Holy shit! Holy shit Shauna!” 

“They are fucking huge!” Shauna gushed as she grabbed one of the fish and immediately cringed at the feeling of the fish’s slimy-scaled skin. “Gross” 

“I know, right? Come on, let's get this back to the cabin before we get some more,” you say with a big smile. You feel relieved. You all will eat tonight and be full tonight. Your dad would be very proud of you. 

You walk back to the cabin in triumph as you laugh and talk with Shauna all the way up the trail. Before too long, you arrive at the cabin, and everyone starts to finish off firing the gun. 

Van's face brightens like a light bulb as she sees you two walk to the cabin with dinner: “Whoa! Look at you!” 

Everyone’s attention turns to you, and they cheer for you both on for the find. 

“You got a fish!” Jackie squealed as she sat up from her seat on the cabin steps. Mari came over and grabbed the fish with a big smile, holding the fish from the mouth with her finger. “No, they caught two fish!” Mari said back, she looked into its lifeless eye. 

“I didn’t do anything.” Shauna chuckled as you shook your head, wanting to share the praise with her. 

You roll your eyes and look back to Mari. You notice behind Mari that Natalie is looking at you with a serious face that you can’t place in your mind. You couldn’t tell if Natalie was angry, happy, or disgusted by the fish. 

“Yeah, the pole still works, thank god.” You chuckle as you put the pole on the wood seat you all have made around the fireplace. You add, “I think it’s a good sign we got two fish. Maybe it’s the woods telling us we’ll be okay until we’re found.” 

You look up to the group, and your eyes meet Lottie’s as if you were saying, “See, told you so” with your eyes. She warily smiles at you and looks down as you silently converse with just the context from earlier. 

“You are you trying to sound like Miss Cleo? Wanna read my future?” Jackie jokes and snickers at your comments, dismissing them as stupid. You chuckle and shake your head, “No, Jackie, I’m being hopeful! I can overread a thing or two.” You say as you push her shoulder; she looks at you and chuckles. 

You and Mari let the fish rest on the cabin table before you descaled them for dinner tonight. There was more than enough for everyone to eat, and it made you feel so proud to be able to provide dinner for everyone. And because you were going to wait anyway, you both put a bowl on top of the fish to keep it fresh until you return from everyone testing out shooting on cans. 

You didn’t care much for the gun or the loud noise of it going off, it unsettled you deeply. It made you feel uncomfortable and cringe at the ringing in your ears. 

Lottie and Van placed the old cans on a log infront of the group, quickly retreating into the brush of the woods. With your arms crossed, you lean against a tree, waiting for everyone to finish practicing there. 

“Team, this is how this will go down—one final round for all the marbles. You got five targets, five shots each. Mari, can you start us off?’ 

“Um, just a thought. Shouldn’t we be saving bullets, you know?” Laura Lee added with concern in her voice. 

“Uh, yeah, in theory, but lucky for us, the nutjob who lived here before was apparently hoarding for the apocalypse.” Couch Ben reassured as best he could. You could tell he didn’t want to be here, but he was putting up as much of a front as he could.

Mari fires a shot at the cans. You quickly cover your ears as you cringe at the boom. She missed the can, and you recoil before she goes again. 

“The cans,” Travis mocks as he looks at her with narrowed, judgemental eyes. You couldn’t stand him in any way lately. His mere voice made you wish it was a gunshot. “You’re-You’re aiming for the cans.” 

“Shut up,” Mari snapped at him as she cocks the gun, still holding it to the cans. 

“Do you like being this way?” Natalie says to Travis, her eyes slowly rolling to him in annoyance. Waiting for the gunshot, you haven’t moved your hands from your ears. 

“If you shit the bed again, you gonna ask for another do-over?” 

Natalie shakes her head at him quietly as you glare at him. You just want him to shut up with his edgy and macho persona so everyone can get on with this stupid practice. You added, “You don’t ask for a do-over, you just clean your fucking bed, we are shooting cans, idiot.” 

Your hands aren’t as firmly over your ears as Mari fires again. You flinch again as you cover them. Your eyes locked in a broad expression as you looked at the cans; the startling way the sound ripped through you, made you freeze like a deer in the woods, hoping the bullet wasn’t for them. 

And she fires again quickly, this time hitting a can. You smile and nod at her, keeping your hands over your ears. You now see the eyes on you as you react to the sounds. You feel a blush over your body as embarrassment comes over you, but you can’t bring yourself to pull your hands down. “Hey. All right.” Couch Ben says calmly but clearly happy she finally hit a can. “Good job, Mari.”  Everyone slowly claps for her. She smiles, and as she walks back to Akilah, she thrusts the Gun into Travis’s hands. 

Travis immediately starts preparing to shoot at the cans, and he hits four cans until he misses his first. 

“So close, flex.” Natalie teased him from behind. You looked at her with a snicker at her comment. 

Suddenly, Travis turns around with the gun ready in his hand, and he aims it at Natalie’s face. “Don’t fucking call me that!”

“Whoa!” You gasp as you step closer to Natalie out of instinct to protect your friend, your eyes as wide as saucers. 

“Travis! Put the gun down.” Couch Ben shouts demands at him, His eyes wide with panic because he can’t stand and take it away from him. 

You don’t even think as you yell, “Put the fucking gun down, Travis! What the fuck are you doing?” 

He then turns around and shoots at the cans after an intense silence. You cringe again at the sound of his gun. 

“All right, that’s, uh-yeah, that’s good shooting, Martinez. Don’t ever do that again.” Couch Ben says awkwardly as everyone quietly watches on with tension in their shoulders. You felt yourself seething with anger bubbling in your stomach. 

“Don’t choke. Again.” He says to Natalie with an antagonistic glare. 

He then backs away and stands near you. You look at him with disgust as you spit at his feet, “Stand away from me, asshole.” You hiss at him.

He looks at you in surprise that you are still so angry at him that you just keep your mean mug on him, and he steps away. He was surprised at your sudden outburst, as did everyone behind you because you were known for being overly friendly, but you ensured he knew not to be near you. 

You look at Natalie and nod, “You got this, girl.” you say. You cover your ears quickly before she does anything else.

Natalie looks at Travis with the same intensity as you and takes a smooth, deep breath. She then puts the gun to her shoulder and hits each can without hesitation. One by One, they drop to the forest floor. She then smiles slowly as she finishes. Everyone cheers and applauds her for showing Travis up.

You snicker as you look at her. Natalie moves her head towards you first. Meeting your eyes with happy eyes and a big smile, she looks at you quickly over and looks away to the other. You blush quickly, trying not to overthink about her looking for your approval first and your praise, and you don’t think much about her looking you over. She sure wasn’t checking you out. 

After the gun practice, everyone searched for berries and mushrooms in the woods. Travis left to the cabin with his tail tucked between his legs after you kept telling him to go away. He left after you said that you don’t trust him and no one should because he acts like a brat. He looked hurt and looked around at the other girls with eyes that screamed he regretted what he did with the gun, but no one had his back. He just stepped back, and you shook your head as you turned to the others. 

“Are any of these, like, Maple syrup trees?” Laura Lee asks as she looks up at the tall sycamore tree.

“What?” Tai questions as she walks behind her, towards the clearing a few feet away. 

“I don’t know,” Laura Lee mumbled as she walked away. She softly touched your shoulder as she walked by, needing you to stabilize her from the trail's incline. 

You found some chestnuts on the ground. They were fresh and not ready yet, and you put them in your pocket as you heard Akilah smack Misty’s hand. 

“Don’t eat that kind,” Akilah panicked as she pushed the mushroom in Misty’s hand on the forest floor. “It’s poisonous.” 

Misty looks at her with big eyes and a little shaky hands. 

Van says, sarcastically, “Like “Kill you” poisonous, or like, “trip your balls off” poisonous?”

“What? I don’t know. My Girl Scout leader didn’t get all that specific about it.” 

” (y/n)?” Taissa asks as she kneels to the ground with Mari.

You look over to Taissa, looking at tiny button-like mushrooms that grow from decaying animals. 

“Don’t eat that one either. That's a dead mushroom. It is too new to eat if we could eat it. It would be like eating rotting meat. Don’t even touch.” You say as you look for more nuts on the forest ground. “Try to look for nuts. They are on the ground. If it has a hole, just drop it for the animals.” 

“Well, could you just show us something edible so we can get going?” Misty asks kindly, impatiently—this is the first time you have heard her sound like that. 

Taissa looks behind her to Misty, rising to stand over her, “What’s the big furry?” 

“Coach needs a sponge bath?” Van teases Misty with a smirk, and you feel one grow on your lips at the joke, too. Everyone pauses to look at Misty, animals looking down at the runt. As a snicker comes to their lips, Taissa fully laughs, covering her mouth. 

“That’s-That’s so mean.” Taissa laughs as she looks to the ground. Everyone softly holds their laughs as Misty storms off. Van laughs as Misty rushes past and giggles out, “I’m sorry. Whatever.” 

Van puts her arm around Taissa’s shoulders, and you look at them. Jealousy courses through you. Why couldn’t you have someone like they do? 

“Get off me!” Taissa patted Van’s arm away. In response, Van smears a smash berry she hid on her finger on Taissa’s face. “Did you put a berry on me?”

“I did.” Van said, taking her arm off her, and moved herself towards you. 

“Okay, so, everyone, we just need to focus. We know we can’t touch those and those ones.” Taissa spoke to the group, trying to lead them back on track,

“No mushrooms, No mushrooms.” Van says as she starts to look up the trees for the chestnuts. 

“Uh, Guys…” Jackie called out from a few yards away. You all moved quickly to her voice out of concern that she had encountered a wild animal in the woods.

 “Jackie? “What is it?” you called back as you rushed to her. 

“Guys, come here!” Jackie laughed.

“Look! Holy Shit!” Jackie exclaimed. You come over some trees and bushes to see Jackie slapping the door of a small personal plane that has vines and moss growing on it. The woods themselves are almost swallowing it, as it has had overgrowth for at least a decade, only covering and trapping it in place.

“W-what is this doing here?” Van asks in disbelief. 

“It must have been the dead guy’s.” Jackie says as she looks at the wheels being stuck in the mud. 

Laura Lee quickly finds the door and opens it, “I wonder if It still works?” Laura Lee questioned to no one in particular. 

Van gently spins the propeller, “Holy fuck!” 

Laura Lee is inside the plane, messing around loudly. You don’t want to get near that thing. You never want to be near a plane again. You stand away as you watch them touch the plane in excitement, everyone else coming closer to the plane.

Suddenly, as your anxieties manifested themselves to life, the plane started from Van’s spinning the propeller and Laura Lee messing around inside. The engine started with a startling rattle as it crept forward. 

“Holy shit.” Van says as she steps back in shock. Jackie is wholly frozen until she suddenly pushes Van out of the way of the plane. 

“Back away! What the fuck?” Jackie says as she is frozen in place.

“Stop the fucking plane!” You scream out to the plane. You feel yourself planted to the ground. You didn’t even react when Van fell to the ground. Everyone yells to stop the plane, and Laura Lee panics inside the plane, crying out, “I’m trying! I’m trying!” 

The plane stopped just in time to avoid harming Jackie. She looked at the plane with buggy, big eyes and took a deep breath of relief. 

Everyone pauses after the intense change of events. You stand frozen in silence as you look down at the wheels and wings. You had an intrusive thought creep into your mind, but you quieted quickly before speaking it out. 

Lottie looks on, almost disassociated, as she says, “It didn’t want him to leave.” 

You turn your head to her and look at her deeply concernedly. She says what you had thought. Maybe the wilderness didn’t want the mummy to leave. That's why he did what he did in the attic and why the air was so suffocating. 

‘21

You giggle at Misty’s goofy joke about old men as you try not to spit out the chocolate martini in your mouth. Earlier today, Misty called you to ask how you were doing after the road trip because she thought the air between you and Natalie was off. She just wanted to check up. It ended up with you sitting across from her at an Italian restaurant. 

“Yeah, so I just turned off the oxygen tank.” She says to add on to the joke, which kind of makes you laugh harder because you can see her doing that. 

“Stop, you didn’t!” You giggle again as you try to hide your face with a napkin; your face is red hot. 

“I didn’t-” Misty laughs with you as she sips on her chocolate martini. She says, “I wouldn’t do that to anyone.” 

“No, you wouldn’t.” You say it with some sternness from Misty’s character. You make her feel more supported if you sometimes reaffirm what she wants to be seen as. You see her in that way. No one likes to be told who they are. 

You notice her laugh, look slightly behind you briefly, and note it. 

“Well, So, How is your work? Any new boos” Misty asks as she takes another sip of her martini. You feel yourself smile at the question and know she asks for more profound reasons. 

“No, no, nothing special about work. And just little flings here and there. Keep the bed warm,” you say as you look at Misty’s eyes intently. You feel a little tense when you ask, “And you? How is it going with Kevin?” You ask with a soft joke about the last time you saw each other. 

Misty became slightly flustered momentarily and shook her head, “I was trying to get Natalie out of her comfort zone.” Looking behind you again, she says, “But more or less the same. No one special enough to say they dated Misty Quigley.” 

You chuckle and smile at Misty’s last comment, but you look behind you as soon as she finishes talking out of curiosity. You see behind a window of the inside of the restaurant. Dressed up nice, Misty is holding her head on her fist, listening to the man across from her, Natalie. Misty is following Natalie. 

“Misty-”

“I can explain!” Misty says as she blabbers on, “I was trying to keep an eye on her and make sure she is okay after seeing Travis because she might do something crazy or relapse.” 

You quietly listen to Misty explain herself with a soft smile as you scoff softly, pulling out your phone, “And here I thought you wanted to spend time with little old me.” 

Misty squeals, “I did want to see you. I wanted to get a drink.” 

“It’s okay.” You chuckle softly and say, “Sometimes you trade friends out for a night out. It’s alright, girl.” 

Suddenly, Misty straightens her back and smiles softly. She lifts her drink to her lips as Natalie rushes to your table. You lean back on your chair with wide eyes, holding your chocolate martini. 

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Natalie hissed to Misty, standing in a black dress. She was clearly on a fate tonight, and you couldn’t help but feel a mumbling jealousy in your stomach as you looked at her.  

“Okay, so, don’t look now, but,” Misty lowers her voice to a whisper and says, “that reporter, Jessica Roberts, is sitting at the bar right now. She’s watching you.” 

“And what are you doing?” Natalie tilted her head to the side as she looked at Misty with suspicious eyes, her tone clear of annoyance. 

“I’m having your back.” Misty stated. 

“Y-you’re having my…” Natalie is in disbelief. “How did you even know I was even here?” 

“I’m a citizen detective, " Misty said, looking at Natalie with big, innocent eyes. 

“I hate to break it to you, but we’re not Rizzoli and Isles. I don’t need you.” 

“Yeah, but, Natalie-” 

“Go the fuck home.” Natalie spat. 

“Alright, you need to stop talking to Misty like that-” You finally cut yourself into the conversation.

“Who are you speaking to?” Natalie snapped her head to you and said, “I expect this from Misty, but you? I don’t understand why you are here.” 

“I’m here, having a drink with Misty. I saw her at her job, and we decided to get drinks.” 

“Oh please, you came here to spy on me! How fucking pathetic. Don’t you have to write a book about rubbing off a genie?” She hissed at you and looked daggers into you. She went too far in your eyes now, and you lean on your elbow on the table as you look back into her eyes. 

“Oh, aren’t you so strong and high mighty?” You hiss lowly to Natalie. Ever since the night in the woods with Natalie, you have had difficulty holding back your teeth when you feel cornered, even a little. “Misty is here protecting you and having your back like always. Because Jessica,” You point to the bar, Jessica looking to the bartender to order another drink, “Is here waiting for you to relapse to spill the beans about it. Stop biting at people trying to be there for you; you might not be so alone. Now go drink, and go on your date with goth freak Kevin Tang.” You cut coldly as you look into Natalie’s blue eyes. You grab your drink, lean back in your chair, take a sip.

“Make sure you don’t go too far. You might need to get another one of your coins, right? What does that make it 9 times you have gotten a sobriety coin?” you stab at her and mention her many times in AA. You didn’t care how hurtful or unnecessary your anger was to her. You must say it to her, and she needed to hear it. She needed to back off Misty. 

It was intense, and it was real. 

You didn’t need to bite so hard. But she didn’t need to bite first.

You two hold a glare as Natalie steps back and scowls at you. She doesn’t say a word. You know why. 

It’s because you are right.   

You feel Misty touching your hand and saying, “Are you alright? That was pretty harsh.” Once, Natalie returned to her table with a perfect smile mask. 

“I’m alright. But I think we should go now.” You say softly as you touch Misty’s hand back, 

Misty holds your hand with a squeeze quickly. She wants to hold you. You have protected her yet again from the wolves in the group. 

You both held the heavy silence as you softly panted a bit.  You felt it in the car; it was surrounding and whole. You were happy and open, as always. 

In the car, you look over to Misty, noticing the flustered face she holds. She was always awkward, but you always found her adoring. As you both drive down to your home, the trees that pass hypnotize you into a calm place. You feel your body, and with each breath you take, cold air enters your nose, and an image of last night's dream comes to your mind. Running past trees, you felt as if you were back there somehow. Maybe it was because of the anniversary, the reporter, or Travis’s death; you couldn’t pinpoint it, but you felt a forgotten hunger you hadn’t felt in a long time. You let it take over like it did them because of the exciting thrill of it all again. It felt youthful and intense. 

“Misty.” 

“Yes?” 

“Do you miss me?” You ask her as you softly touch a lint off her shoulder.

“W-what do you mean? I have been with you for the past two hours.” She says as she drives down your street. 

“No. No, Misty.” You chuckle, and the hunger comes over you. You want to feel warm; you have been far too cold lately. “Have you missed me and the warmth we shared?”

You don’t understand yourself. You sound like you did all those years ago in the woods. How sexual you became without trying. It felt like the air around us darkened into lustful wants and licks. How natural you were with your body. 

Misty was caught off guard by how quickly your words changed the car's atmosphere. The memories of the wilderness and how you looked her over suddenly brought back feelings that she thought were long gone. Misty’s throat tightened, and her heart quickened as she glanced over at you, taking in the expression on your face as you asked her the question. She slowly parked the car, her hands gripping the steering wheel tight “Y-yeah, I did…”

Your hand snakes onto Misty’s inner thigh, and your thumb rubs the fabric of her jeans. Your eyes stare down at your hand. 

“Would you like to feel my heat again?” you whisper, feeling your hot breath hitting off her cheek. You don’t understand the tingling and desperatiness your cunt feels at this moment. You shouldn’t have touched her, spoken to her, or even considered thinking about her. You knew better than to let yourself cave into your primal instincts, instincts you have because of the wilderness with them. All the hurt in the woods manifested into want as it always did.   

Misty’s breath hitches at the feeling of your hand on her thigh, and her heartbeat quickens in her chest as her skin tingles under your touch. It's almost as if no time has passed at all. Your words and desperate tone send a shiver down her spine as she glances over at you, her eyes darkening with lust and need. “Yes… please.” She whispered back, her voice filled with want. Your hand moves up her thigh and softly rubs the fabric at the crotch of her jeans. You could feel her heat underneath. 

You lunged at Misty, cupping her cheeks with your hands. You pulled her into your face and kissed her. Your lips met and mashed together as your hands moved closer to her, pushing her back against the driver’s side door. Thank God you live on a dirt road. 

Misty lets a small gasp into the kiss as your hand moves up her thigh. Her body already feels as if it's on fire. She responds to the kiss passionately, her desire for you growing with each passing second. She reaches up and grips your hair, pulling you closer as she deepens the kiss, her tongue exploring your mouth with desperate need.

(y/n) hands quickly work to unbutton Misty's jeans. You move your kisses off Misty's lips to her jaw and neck. Misty lets out a small moan as your lips move down her jaw. She leans her head back and closes her eyes, surrendering herself to the feel of your lips on her skin. The feel of your tongue moving down her neck, sending small licks and nips here and there, makes her shiver in pleasure. You softly growl in lust as you start to pull the jeans and underwear down her pale legs, your thumb touching the bare skin. She spreads her legs farther apart, allowing you to pull her jeans and underwear down, her breathing getting more labored with each passing second. 

You quickly push your two fingers inside of Misty’s weeping cunt, and she dramatically moves her leg to the center console for you to have more of her. You move her head from her neck and just look at her as you push inside of her, a gasp rattling the car escapes from her. 

You look into her brown eyes for a moment as you see when pleasure takes over her being as you feel her walls tighten around your fingers. You feel her pink, wet hole flex and twitch to your fingers; it feels like she hasn’t had sex in a long time as you start to pump your fingers into her. 

Her hand locks into your hair, or more so your head, as she rubs her other hand on your shoulder. She softly pushes you down to her cunt as she rolls her head back in a deep moan. You feel the vibration on the pads of your pointer and middle fingers. You feel the hotness of her cunt as you lean down, her musk clouding your judgment and making you think of only one thing. 

You lean down, pushing your body to the floor of the passenger’s seat, licking her cunt. You taste her flavor and wetness leaking from her clit. You circle your tongue around the bulb with reckless abandon. You feel her gushing onto your fingers, and her loud moans only encourage you to go harder. 

“(y-y/n)! Honey- right there, yeah!” Misty’s needy, desperate moans fill the car up with hot air. Her legs shake as she rolls her eyes.  She panted like an animal as you tongue into her, sucking up all her wetness as you could. You felt throbbing in your wrist as you curled your fingers up to touch her soft spot. You could have been here for days and not cared. 

Misty grabs her breast as she arches her back to your mouth. She moaned louder and louder to tell you she was going to cum, but you didn’t care. You kept licking and sucking her juices. 

“Sweet Jesus!” Misty whispers to the air as she feels you fuck her harder with your mouth. She finally lets out a high-pitched, needy groan as her feet curl, legs twitching. Her eyes closed as her head hit the glass of her door, and she leaned back to relish in the feeling. You bury yourself in her folds, looking up from her lap, and watch as she shivers, as your tongue doesn’t stop. 

You move your mouth up to her clit again and your fingers into her hole, pounding her with an elemental need to feel your fingers caress her cervix. You don’t move again. You don’t care how uncomfortable it felt as your legs were pinched into the floor, or how the cupholder stabbed into your rib, or that your neck was throbbing so that you could hear your heartbeat. You wanted her, and you wanted to feel her ultimately come undone to your fingers again.

‘96 

The clattering of some forks and spoons scrap across the plates, people talking over everyone else, and the heat of the fire warm the cabin’s first floor. Everyone was in a better mood after shooting practice and settling for the night. Travis sits alone in the corner of the room, rejected by everyone tonight as punishment. You felt yourself thinking about him being sad and alone in the corner. “Good.” 

Jackie and Shauna sit beside you at the table, your attention entirely on them and their discussion about how Pamala Anderson’s sex tape scandal. 

“I mean, she shouldn’t have been a slut and done it, is all I have to say.” Jackie shrugged and took a bite of the white fish, and her face cringed when she pulled out a small bone. 

“No!” You say with a chuckle and shake of your head, “Someone shouldn’t have robbed their safe and sold the sex tape.” 

“She shouldn’t have even done it. Like, who just does a porno if they are not a slut?” 

“She was with her husband. Who else are you supposed to have a sex tape with?” Shauna asked as she shook her head at Jackie.

“No one! No one should ever do a porn! It's so degrading.”  

“I don’t know, I don’t know how someone would want to make one, but she wasn’t with a whole lot of guys.  She’s married to Tommy Lee. And it was supposed to be his thing for tour.”

“Yeah, who wouldn’t think a Mötley Crüe member would have a sex tape? I wouldn’t be surprised if they taped the many other women they have fucked,” You say as you delightfully eat the fish. It was fresh and delicious after days of only eating berries and leftover snacks you could find from the crash. You are having meat, and it feels like a real treat as you haven’t tasted anything as delicious in weeks. 

Before you could continue, Van touched your shoulder as you looked at Jackie. You turned to her as she said, “Hey, do you have a sweater I can burrow? I don’t think anyone else has anything I can wear.” 

You smiled big at Vanessa, nodding your head, and stood up. “Yeah, I have a few.” 

“Where are you going?” Jackie asks sassily as you get up. She tilts her eyes at you. 

Shauna looks up at you and is slightly confused, but she also asks, “Are you coming back?” 

“Yeah, just getting something for Van, hold up.” You say as you start to walk away. 

“Thanks, (y/n). You're a lifesaver.” Van beams as her smile moves with you. You touch her shoulder as you walk past her, and you walk over to the other side of the cabin to the bags. 

You were one of the lucky ones that found all your luggage. You had your carry-on, luggage, and purse still intact and untouched from the fire. You were so happy to have your journal and book you haven’t finished, but you felt bad for everyone still looking for their things. Van could only find her carry-on; some didn’t have anything they packed. You all carried every bag you could find, but some still had missing clothes. Because of that, Van has been coming to you to burrow clothes as the only other heavy girl much smaller than you, so you let her burrow your shirts and hoodies since the crash.

 A small sandwich bag falls to the floor as you open the bag and grab the heavy yellowjackets sweatshirt. It was your stash of weed with the rolling papers and filters. You blush as you quickly grab the bag from the ground and put it into your jeans pocket. You look behind you to see if anyone has seen that, with embarrassment painted all over your face.

You walk back over to Van and hand her the hoodie. You smile widely as you sit down. You didn’t want everyone to know you had weed, but you think that tonight would be the best night to do anything. You smile as you whisper into Jackie’s ear, “I have weed.” 

She stops eating instantly, and her eyes bug out. She looks over at you and laughs, “What?” 

You hit her shoulder softly as she laughs again, “You have what?” 

“What?” Shauna asks, besides Jackie, and when you two make eye contact, it makes you laugh. 

You whisper in Jackie’s ear again. “I have weed. Would we like a joint?” Jackie laughs and hits you on the shoulder, her mouth wide open in shock and amusement. She nods her head and whispers to Shauna, and you turn your head to Van, “Hey, I have a joint-” 

“What?” Van asks as she leans her ear towards your lips. Your lips accidentally graze her ear, and you say, “I have a joint. Tell the other seniors. Don’t be suspicious; don’t tell the underclassmen.” 

Van smirk grew wide on her freckled face as she nods her head, she says. “Okay, I’ll let them know. When are we doing this?” 

“When everyone is asleep, " you tell her, knowing that if anyone overhears you, they will not understand what you are discussing. 

 You light the joint with a twig, puffing the air out of the end of the filter. You hear muffled giggles from Jackie and Shauna beside you. " Stop laughing,” you snicker back and pull the joint from your lips. You pull Shauna and Jackie to the back of the cabin and show them the weed you packed on the plane. You all decide to roll one out. 

“Didn’t know you would have the good stuff,” Jackie smirks with an amused laugh in her voice. She takes a puff and hands it to Shauna with a muffled cough. 

Shauna laughs softly as she also smokes and coughs in response to inhaling the smoke. She covers her mouth with her elbow, and you laugh at her. 

Van moves behind the cabin's hunter shed, and Taissa, Natalie, and Lottie follow her. 

“Hey!" you say to them as you take a hit of the joint and blow the smoke quickly.

Natalie says to you, “Damn, (y/n). Didn’t know you were such a criminal. Hand that over to me.”

You giggle happily as you hand it over to Natalie. You look up at her from your spot on the log. She looks down at you with heavy eyes as she takes a hit. She slowly looks over your face again before handing it over to Van. You felt a blush come over you again as you felt her eyes scan over your features, and you didn’t know what to do. You felt insecure and flattered at the attention but still deeply hesitated to meet her eyes. 

Natalie, who never passes up a joint, reaches out her hand to take it from you while Taissa eyes it. Lottie looks at the joint and then at you with a tiny bit of concern; the others knew she’d probably be the one most concerned about the joint.

“Where’d you get that from?” Nat asks as she inhales the joint.

You felt yourself joke, “Where do you think I got weed from?’ 

“I don’t know. A drug dealer.” Van jokes to you with a scrunch of her freckled nose. 

“Sort of. My mom is the one who has the weed. She has a weed card since she got diagnosed with cancer.” You said without realizing the words from your throat. You hadn’t thought about your mom almost all day, “She grows some behind our house in the woods, Natalie,” You point at her jokingly, “Don’t get any ideas. You have to buy that shit.” 

Everyone laughs loudly at your joke. Lottie takes the joint and smiles, holding the smoke in her mouth. You look at your feet, and suddenly, your mother comes to mind. You think about your mom, and a lump grows in your throat. Did she take her night medicine? Is she watching Frasier? Is she worrying about you?  

From the side of the shed, there is a crunch of leaves and twigs, and a petite figure comes from behind the shed. Natalie turns herself and turns back to face you. She gives you a face of “fuck it's her again.” 

Misty comes from the shed, pushing a curl behind her ear as she looks at the group. You smile at her as Jackie rolls her eyes, smoking the joint beside you. 

“Hey Misty! What are you doing here?” 

“H-hi. I was going to the bathroom. What are you guys doing?” she asks nervously as she approaches the group. 

“Drugs.” Lottie says as she looks at Misty with a humorous tone. 

You laugh as you take the joint from Jackie and wave your hand to Misty to enter the circle, “Come closer, it’s okay; it’s legal here.” You joke, and it makes everyone laugh with bloodshot eyes. Misty chuckles and looks around at everyone in approval. Sometimes, it was painful to see her so desperate for some kind of friendship that it made you feel bad, so in your intoxicated state, you pulled your hand out for her, “You can try it if you want to, Misty. Sit.” 

Misty’s eyes looked wide as everyone turned their head towards you as you invited her into the smoke circle, but no one stopped you. They seemed also to want to see what Misty does. 

“I-I can? Is it safe?” she asks as she approaches the log beside you. 

Jackie snickered and looked at Misty with narrow eyes, “No, that’s why we are all smoking on it.” She condescended. 

You shake your head and take Misty’s hand. “Ignore her. Just don’t take a huge hit. You gotta get used to it, then you’ll want more,” You told Misty gently. You puff the joint before it goes out in the wind. Your body is starting to relax and calm in the woods, and your neck doesn’t hurt as much as it did earlier. 

You hand Misty the joint, and everyone watching the scene plays out with amused eyes. You gently hold your hand over hers to guide her. “Have you ever smoked a cigarette?” 

“No, they’re bad for you.” 

You chuckle and nod, “Yes, but they are just like weed. You take small inhales, not like you're trying to breathe it in, but sip on a drink with a straw, okay? Baby puff.” You say, pulling the joint back to your lips and showing her. 

Your lips wrap around the filter softly as you take a quarter breath in. You then dramatically hold it out and show that you take the rest of the breath through your mouth. You hold the smoke in for a moment and then let it out for her to understand. “You get it now?” you cough. 

“I-I think.” she says as she takes the joint from you, holding it between shaky fingers. She takes a puff and then starts coughing furiously. Natalie took the joint from Misty’s shaking hand before it fell to the ground, she takes a puff inbetween her laughs. 

Misty holds her fist to her lips as she tries to get all the smoke out of her lungs. Everyone laughs happily and claps for her when she does it, enjoying seeing Misty try something for the first time. You put your hand on her back to pat it gently. She seems to relax at your touch momentarily before finally getting her coughing under control.

“You finally tried marijuana for the first time!” You exclaim and rub a circle on Misty’s back, her cheeks crimson. 

“It was amazing,” Misty breathlessly says as she looks at everyone else. Everyone is very high now, and their eyes are bloodshot and dry. You smack your lips, longing for a drink. 

“Misty, have you ever drank?” Lottie asks as she sits with her knees to her chest. She tilts her head to the sides and watches Misty’s facial expressions. You didn’t understand the feeling you felt from her eyes. It felt almost like she was studying and calculating Misty. You have never seen that look on someone. 

Misty studders and says, “Y-Yeah, I have. I stole some sherry from my mother’s cabinet.” 

Van laughs a little “whoa” out as a joke about how mild Misty’s confession was, the smoke of the joint coming out of her mouth like the hot breath of a hunger wolf, and she says, “I’ve done crazier.” 

Taissa looks at Van with a playful glare and says, “Like what?” 

“I stole a whole bottle fo whiskey from my mom. And she didn’t even find out. She didn’t even realize she didn’t drink it, so she just got more for herself.” Van confesses with a smug smirk on her face, and Natalie chuckles and nods her head like she’s done that before to her mom. You felt a little wrong about what Van said because it made you feel like her mom had a nasty drinking problem. 

“I did that before with my mom’s cigarettes.” Natalie says, “They never notice if you just take a few here and there.” 

Jackie smirked and said, “I know every one of my mom's pills in the bathroom cabinet. I took a few for the trip. She’s never caught me before.” 

“My dad is very strict with those things. I don’t think I can do anything without my parents knowing,” Lottie said, looking to the ground with a severe expression. You couldn’t put your finger on it, it her confession felt like it had a little more then she was letting on. Lately she has been off and talking more vague about things, and confessing more things about her life. Lottie’s parents were strict but the more you hear about them it sounds like they hover over Lottie’s every move.  

“My mom just grows the shit, and I just take it.” You blurt out with your words softly slurring because you are high, and you realize you talked about your mom again. Was she okay? 

Everyone laughs at how you talk and starts to laugh at their words sounding like yours—slurred and funny to hear. 

You felt a sudden wave come over you as you laughed with your friends. It felt good—maybe too good—so good that it made you think about your mother. Was she okay? Did she get her pills on time? Did she bathe? Did she go to chemo?

In your laughter, your laughs turn to sobs in a second. You cover your mouth as heavy sobs leave your throat. You couldn’t help yourself. You couldn’t stop yourself. 

Everyone slowly realized that your sounds weren’t in glee anymore; they were out of sorrow and a moment of weakness. 

When you look, you see brown eyes, concerns, and worry on all the faces. You let out one thing that you knew was going to hurt them. Your body didn’t stop itself from letting out deep-seated sorrow. 

“I’m sorry. I really miss my parents and momm- mom so much.” You whimpered as you wiped your tears. You had a full belly and a fire keeping you warm. But inside, you have never been so cold and helpless in these woods. 

Everyone’s faces soften and twist in their sadness. We all know what we are feeling, and they also start tearing up. Everyone missed their parents, and you felt like an asshole even saying anything. 

You sniffle and try to stop your tears. Being strong has worn you down, but you have a “strong shoulder.” Like your father always said, you can handle the hurt. 

You say to everyone, “I think we all need some love right now. Group hug. Please.” Standing up, throwing the dying joint into the fire, moving your plush arms around to urge them to you.  

One by one, they stood, hovered over you, and hugged you and each other—a moment of shared pain and joy. Being strong was hard, but as you felt them hold you, you felt a second wind. You have to get yourself and the others out of here. Out of these fucking woods. 

Note 2: Sorry to anyone who wanted to be on the taglist and I couldn’t add you! I hope you still find this fic!

[heartz4shauna]

my kink is karma.

word count: crickets..

warnings: nat cheats. mentions of lottienat. angst. she/her pronouns used for reader and nat. mentions of sex. swearing. making out. super light smut. probably ooc. not proofread.

don’t like it? don’t read it.

tags: @ludupedia @butterfliesandivy @thankynext

natalie and you are dating! well, were dating.

your whole relationship kinda collapsed when she left the state for nationals. you kept asking to go with her to support her but she refused, telling you how lottie, a girl on her soccer teams parents couldn’t afford it. bullshit. you’ve seen the shit lottie rolls up to school in. prada, chanel, the whole works. they couldn’t afford one extra seat? yeah right.

the whole time natalie was away you tried calling her, calling the hotel she and the team were supposed to be staying at, only for a blatant receptionist to tell you there was no one saying there under the name, as she said it, annalee scatario, whoever that was.

she confessed to you when she came home that she and lottie had, to put it bluntly, fucked. jesus. it was a lot for your poor heart at the time. you two had been intimate before, you thought it was something you did. or maybe didn’t do. “was i not good enough? was she better? was there something else i could’ve done?” you asked pleadingly, your eyes watering. she just looked at you and shook her head, “it’s not that.”

you truly thought you and nat had a connection. true, you felt like that with every little crush you had since you were nine, but, she was your first relationship. your first love. your first what you thought was love.

it was hard for you to get over her, of course, having to see her almost every day in your classes. having to sit beside her in classes, damned with an ‘S’ lastname.

she’d glance at you during class and, the odd time, she’d try to talk to you. “hey, look. i’m sorry for… what i did. are we cool?” you’d just look back at her and tense your jaw, that’ll show her.

you started seeing more of lottie and nat together and it made you boil with anger- no. jealousy. that’s what it was.

your whole life wasn’t great. you grew up in the same trailer park as natalie, and that’s how you got to know each other. your mom wasn’t around all that much, working multiple jobs to support you and your siblings and your dad wasn’t in the picture. she’d listen to you when you had to complain and you’d do the same for her. you cried in each others arms some nights. connection.

but, lottie? what was she to cry about? she had parents, both parents, drowning in money, choking on their wealth. she was pretty and got good grades, she played soccer. everything in her life was perfect, you thought. they should just have each other, the princess and the stable boy.

after the initial shock of the breakup, you started to pick yourself up again. instead of staying focused in class, you’d skip class, just how you always did with nat. you waltzed into the bathroom, backpack on your bag and leaped into one of the stalls, glad to be almost back to your regular self.

you threw yourself onto the toilet with a sigh, pulling out a pack of cigarettes from the front pocket of your backpack that was perched on your knee. you took out a cig and lit it, putting it to your lips.

just as you were about to take a puff, two pairs of shoes stomped into the stall next to you. “god, natalie. why didn’t you tell me you two were serious?” oh my god, it’s lottie. is she.. talking about you? you heard a sigh and a chuckle. okay, that’s natalie. lottie and nat. they’re both talking about you. right next to you.

“lottie,” natalie drawled, “we’re over now. she doesn’t matter,” she chuckled out. rude. lottie sounded as if she was about to cry, “i’m a home wrecker, natalie. oh my god! i wouldn’t have even came into your room if i had have known.”

you couldn’t begin to believe what you were hearing. lottie was.. being kind? to you of all people? wow.

“lottie! we’re not together anymore, yeah? you don’t need to worry about her, i’m sure she’s already fucking someone else,” natalie reassured her, chuckling. what the fuck? already fucking someone else? that’s not very ‘i feel like i can only be myself around you’ of her. not very ‘i only want you’ of her.

you raised the cig to your lips and took a puff, feeling yourself become genuinely interested in what the pair had to say about you.

you could practically hear lottie roll her eyes before she stormed out of the bathroom. you let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding, as well as an earth shaking cough. unfortunately for you, natalie heard it.

“who’s in there?” she called out. you kept your mouth shut, barely breathing. she continued, “if you know who.. we were talking about, don’t tell her. please.” you allowed your voice to go as deep as it could and spoke loudly, “yes! i have no idea who you are talking about! good luck with that though. ha! women, am i right!” natalie chuckled awkwardly, “ha, yeah..”

she left the bathroom and you felt yourself tear up slightly. already fucking someone else. who does she think you are? you wiped your tears and took a deep breath, finishing off your cigarette.

a few weeks after that.. interaction, you noticed lottie and natalie hanging out a lot less than before. they wouldn’t even sit next to each other at lunch. yeah, okay, granted nat did skip lunch every other day to go bum cigarettes from the other goths in school. but, you’d seen them together at lunch often. sitting opposite each other and giggling, it made you sick.

but now, lucky for you, they were hanging out less. which in all honesty made you jump up and down and shoot your fist in the air.

you thought that maybe they broke up? if you’d even call it that. a fuck up? basically, they stopped hanging out and only really talked when they needed to. for example; whilst playing soccer or if they were partners on an assignment.

you noticed lottie becoming a lot more like you knew her before. she was back to that popular pretty rich girl and less like the girl who was trying to defend you in the bathroom. you were fine with it, you never cared for her much. but natalie on the other hand, she was a mess.

i mean, going through two break ups in the same.. what? month? must be rough. you felt bad for her, just a little. even after what she said in the bathroom. maybe it was her way of coping? making jokes of everything. that’s what she normally did anyway. but you knew what she actually felt on the inside.

you both used to walk home together after school, you’d wait for her after practice after you finished study. now, you two stood on opposite side of the street, natalie giving you glances every few steps.

finally getting back home, you knocked on your door, “dipshit! open the door!” dipshit was a common name you used for your siblings. you could hear one of them groan and stumble over to the door, pulling it open, “hello.” “hi,” you greeted, shoving your way into the trailer. natalie took one last look at you before she walked into her home.

natalie had been planning this for days. trying to work it out in her head how she would make it up to you. she regretted, deeply, sleeping with lottie. she did love you, she did, she just got caught up in the moment, apparently. then it all fell apart with lottie and now it was her turn to be sad.

what was her plan exactly? okay. so, it wasn’t clear to her. she knew what she was supposed to do, go knock at your door, apologise and get back together. she knew you would never agree though.

you walked into your cramped bedroom and flung yourself onto your bed with a sigh. homework. you took out your papers from the day, a pen and got to work.

about an hour or so of doing homework, you finally finished and it was already dark outside. you got up from your bed and decided it was time to change it something more comfortable. you threw on a pair of pyjamas pants and a Hello Kitty shirt.

your stomach growled as you exited your bedroom, your sibling was sprawled out on the couch, playing a video game, “hey, we’re gonna head out in a while. tell mom we’re staying at a friends house, cool?” you nodded, walking over to the small kitchen, “don’t drink too much. mom worries for you guys.” they waved you off dismissively, switching through tv channels.

you popped some bread in the toaster and waited for it to toast. you buttered it once it was ready and jumped onto the couch next to your sibling, “anything good on?” you asked them through bites. they shook their head and handed you the remote, “nah. i’m heading out anyway.” so quickly? alright. “oh, okay. have fun,” you said with a shrug as they got up and left.

you searched through the channels on your tv, with nothing interesting. you finished the last bite of your toast and tossed the remote onto the coffee table.

there was a knock on the door, you sighed and got up. “who is it?” you called out, walking over to the door. no reply. you rolled your eyes and swung the door open, it was natalie.

she looked up at you as she fidgeted with her fingers, “hi,” she said quietly. you sucked in a breath, “hi. what do you want?” she cleared her throat, “uh, i wanted to talk to you. about us.” “about what? what about us? there is no us. you know that, you knew that after you and lottie..” you huffed, rubbing the bridge of your nose,

“what happened between you two anyway? you just stopped hanging out all of a sudden, did lottie feel guilty or something?” you asked her, knowing the answer. she shook her head, “it’s.. complicated. can i come in?”

you opened the door for her to enter, albeit reluctantly, “fine.” she gave a small nod and walked in, making a beeline to your bedroom. “nat!” you called out, trying to stop her, “jesus christ,” you sighed in defeat.

you followed her into your bedroom and shut the door behind you. natalie was laying face down on your bed, her head smooshed into your pillows. “natalie,” you gritted out, “get up.” the only response you got from her was a grumbled “why?”

she flipped herself over and stared at you at the door, “yeah, me and lottie aren’t.. talking anymore. she felt guilt after. she didn’t know that we were serious,” she admitted. your eyebrows knitted together in confusion, “what are you talking about? you slept with her because she didn’t know we were serious? you do realise you slept with her, too, don’t you? it wasn’t just her who did something wrong, natalie. you’re so full of shit.”

her expression softened, “i’m sorry. i- i really am. it wasn’t my idea, that’s why i said that. look, if it means anything, i was thinking of you the whole time.” you walked over to the bed and stood in front of were she was laying, “you were thinking of me, really? you didn’t think of anything else? not even.. i dunno, telling her you had a girlfriend?”

“i’m sorry!” she yelled, “i am, believe me, please.” she sat up, looking at you pleadingly. “natalie, i want to believe you, i do,” you took a shaky breath, “but i loved you. and you obviously didn’t care about us. but, now you do, because it’s not just lottie that feels guilty, it’s you, too.”

she stood up, her eyebrows furrowed and you knew what she was thinking. you shook your head, “we’re not doing this again.” “please.” was all she said before she crashed her lips into yours.

your body instantly reacted, a warmth spreading all over. a warmth that you haven’t felt since before she left. “i fucking missed you,” she grumbled, pulling you closer to her. “shut up,” you groaned pushing her back onto your bed. “i knew you missed me,” she said with a smirk, pulling you down onto her.

you moved her hair out of the way of her neck and began kissing down it as her fingers made their way through your hair, “fuckk,” she groaned out, “s’ nice..”

“you’re such a bitch,” you mumbled against her neck, “you know that, right? wouldn’t even be doin’ this if you hadn’t come over.” natalie chuckled at your words, tilting your head to look at her, “had a choice, didn’t you?” “fuck off,” you moaned, going back to kissing her neck.

she pulled your face back to hers and pushed her lips onto yours once again as you straddled her lap. “haven’t done this in a while,” she got out in between kisses. “i wonder why,” you muttered, a grin spreading across your face suddenly. “lay down,” you instructed her, and she did so. she looked up at you with a smirk, “why?” you shook your head as you tried to unbutton her jeans, but failed.

she sat up slightly and helped you taken them off before you threw them to the other side of the room. “where were we?” you questioned, kissing down her stomach lightly which caused her to groan, ‘c’monnn.” “patience, please.”

she threw her head back against your pillows with a sigh. “come on, nat, don’t give in so early,” you joked, squeezing her side gently.

gaining your composure once again, you snaked downwards to her thighs, pressing gentle, wet kisses onto her hot skin. “c’mon, seriously.” she groaned out once again. you looked up at her, feigning innocence, “what?” “stop fuckin’ around maybe?” you hummed thoughtfully at her suggestion, your lips still on her skin, then shook your head.

“nah, i don’t think so,” you answered. you heard a sound of.. rattling from the front door. someone was trying to get in. fuck.

you instantly shot up and looked down at natalie with panicked eyes, “if it’s my mom, she’ll kill us both.” “oh, shit,” she said, looking almost as panicked as you and shoved herself under your covers, covering her lower half.

you got up and left the bedroom to go open the door. it was your sibling, “forgot my keys,” they explained. oh. “oh, yeah, okay,” you opened the door and let them in. they noticed you looked a bit panicked and asked “you okay?” you just nodded, walking back over to your bedroom.

they walked over with you quietly and peeped their head inside, “is that natalie? i didn’t know you two were back together,” they said, punching you in the shoulder playfully. you turned back to them, rolling your eyes, “we’re not.”

natalie nodded to your words, “yeah, we’re not back together. yet.”

[mvlders222]

hii, could you write about Natalie scatorccio and a reader with anxiety problems?

I know it's a sensitive topic and I will understand if you don't want to write about this.

(sorry if I don't express myself well, English is not my native language)

a/n; hi!! thank you for the request. i hope i wrote this well and to your liking. reader's gender is female. i have a handful of people in my life with clinical anxiety, but i also did my research before diving into this topic. if the way i describe these feelings isn't accurate, please let me know so i can edit/rewrite this fic.

𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐲 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥

pairing ; natalie scatorccio x fem!reader

wordcount ; 1.1k

summary ; nat invites you to one more party, and you typically never accept. she reasons that this would be the last one before your guys’ flight tomorrow for nationals. this however doesn’t seem to go as planned…

warnings ; anxiety, overthinking, sorta angst to fluff, alcohol, underage drinking, mention of smoking (let me know if there's any more!)

You and Natalie had been dating for two months now. And you knew each other even earlier than that. But throughout your time knowing her, she had never not invited you to any event whether it be a smoke sesh or a bonfire.

And you had always turned her down. This wasn’t your way of rejecting her, but it wasn’t exactly your crowd. You could only conjure up the most ridiculous and almost impossible situations that would happen because you just showed up in a social setting.

Your guys’ first date in your backyard where you guys shared a pizza and your first kiss (probably not a good kiss with the pizza). The point was that it was in the privacy of your own home.

You know Nat would never force you to do anything you wouldn’t want to do. But considering how she felt going to these parties without you, you decided you finally show. So she came to your house minutes before the party to help you prepare.

There you stood in front of your mirror, Natalie behind you looking at your guys’ reflection. She had her hands on your shoulders and smiled at you through the mirror.

She was dressed in a leather jacket and worn in Doc Martins. She had a red pleated skirt and ripped fishnets and a plethora of rings adorned her fingers. She had smudged eyeliner around her eyes but it was meant to look like that.

You were simply wearing a long sleeve since it was chilled out. A pair of thrifted jeans that were your favorite pair, despite them already being worn.

“Are you ready?” She smiled at you and you nodded. She kissed your cheek and grabbed your hand to drag you out of your bedroom and your house.

It wasn’t a far walk, just further out into the woods so you both walked there, hand in hand.

“Have you ever been to one of these before?” Nat smirked. It wasn’t mean, it was a genuine question. “You just never wanna come with me when I offer.”

“Not really to any parties. I’ve been to the football games but I never have any fun there,” you shrugged. You were the type to stay in and enjoy a movie, rather than agree with people who speak in majority filler words. It was exhausting to try and find any way to talk to these people without absolutely crumbling.

“I thought it’d be nice though. Since we leave tomorrow,” you smiled. You looked at the dead leaves on the ground as the two of you walked together.

As you got closer and closer to the bonfire, you could see the light and hear a mix of chatter, laughter, and music. A heavy feeling started to settle in your stomach, but you tried to push it down because what would Nat think if you wanted to turn around?

When you started to catch up with people and run into the couples sucking faces, it was like a middle school dance. People were spread out across the woods, but no one was dancing to the music. All talking in their small groups, holding red solo cups full of something.

“I’m gonna go find a keg.” Natalie let your hand go and walked away from you, walking through different circles of people to find a buzz.

You tried following her, but her trail was too spontaneous. She would push people apart from each other, even when they were invested in a full-on conversation. She would split trees and walk through bushes.

So afraid of losing her, you weren’t paying attention to the others around you, mumbling different “sorry”s to several strangers. Maybe you had been paying too much attention to the people around you and that’s how you lost your girlfriend in the crowds.

You couldn’t ask anyone for help, they seemed to look at you like you snuck onto earth. Whether it was the anxiety or the plethora of circles you’d made searching for Natalie, your nausea was starting to set in.

Your stomach was tied in knots and you suddenly felt like you couldn’t move. Your breathing became shallow. The lights were too bright and the music was too loud, it was hard to even think in a setting like this.

An unexpected hand grasped at your shoulder and tugged you around. Trying not to fall over your own feet, you grabbed at anything physical in front of you.

Your eyes came into focus. “Natty!” You let out what felt like the last breath you’d ever take. You pulled her toward you in a great embrace. You felt a splash at your feet and arms wrap around you hesitantly.

“Baby, I’m so sorry,” she apologized earnestly. You both pulled away slightly. “I completely forgot and I feel like a complete jerk-“

“You dropped your beer,” you interrupted her. Your monotone made her smile and laugh. It was something so simple that didn’t compare to the situation that was happening.

“I hadn’t even noticed.” She smiled and pecked the corner of your lips. She looked down at your hand and held it gently with her own, toying with the tips of your fingers. Looking back up to meet your eyes, her face became soft. “Do you wanna go?”

You took a deep breath and looked at her as if she had confused you for someone else. “No, it’s okay! But if you wanna stay. I’ll just go–”

She quickly shushed you and held your face in her hands. “Shh, baby… I love you more than some… party.” She giggled at the situation.

“Are you sure? Have you even talked to your friends yet?” All of your questions made her shut you up again, pressing her lips to yours, trying to get you to stop mumbling into your kiss.

She pulled away and gave you a knowing look. You just replied with a small smile on your lips. Natalie furrowed her brows as she licked her lips once over. “Is that cherry?”

“Yeah, it came in, like, a pack of four.” You giggled in response to her behavior.

“That gives us one more reason to leave,” She moved her hands to grab yours, pulling you away from the rest of the party. “We have to try all of them. If they’re as good as they taste, ya know.”