#Nat out here pushing boundaries

[xqueen-of-disasterx]

Lonely

Paring: Innocent!reader x dads!friend!Nat

Summery: You looked lonely Natasha could fix that

Warnings: SMUT, pervy Nat, innocent reader, (legal) age gap, masturbation, intersex nat, oral, fingering, p in v, slight degradation, pet names, anal play, manhandling, fluff at the end, implied aftercare,

Word count: 1.8k

!Disclaimer English is not my first language so please excuse any grammar or spelling errors. This story is completely fictional!

AN: @xxforeverinadayxx it’s a bit late but I hope you like it

Masterlist

ꕀꕀ ─── ⋆⋅ ✨🌞✨ ⋅⋆─── ꕀꕀ

Natasha knew very well how morally wrong her behavior was but how could she help herself when you were this cute. She was aware of the fact that Steve had an adult daughter but until this burning summer in Italy she had yet to meet you. But time came and Natasha found herself living with the most beautiful girl alive. Natasha had tried to spend as much time as she could with you, trying to find out everything about you. She’d take you on cycling trips and read to you your favorite novel while laying in the grass. You had been enchanted by Natashas presence. She was kind and yet smart. She happened to like the same authors as you and treated you like an adult, and not like your father who always shielded you. You didn’t want to accept it but you quickly had a crush on the older woman. In your eyes she was just perfect.

Who could’ve known that all of that was just a facade Natasha had put on to hide her true perverted fantasies. She had wanted you from the moment you first stepped down the stairs only wearing a light summer dress who looked so beautiful on you. She couldn’t flirt with you like she would with any other girl. No. Natasha had to be smart about it. She couldn’t risk Steve picking up on her true intentions with you. Natasha also of course didn’t want to do anything to you that you didn’t want. She might have been a pervert but she wouldn’t step over that boundary. Natasha knew exactly what she was searching for when she forged through your drawer. Her long fingers delicately caressing over the light pink cotton fabric of your panties. Her breathing was heavy as she quickly stuffs the the piece of fabric into the back pocket of her suit pants.

She’d do it like she did many times before on her summer vacation at your fathers mansion. Natasha would take the piece of clothing to her room and deep in the night when everyone else would be asleep her hands would find their way into her boxers. Moving her hand up and down her shaft as she whimpers your name quietly wishing it would be your smaller hands instead. She would grunt and moan muffled by her pillowcase. She’d cum into your panties cleaning her seed from the deep red tip of her cock. The next day while you would be in the garden she would put it back neatly folded hoping you would notice the difference which was a false hope. You weren’t aware why your “fresh” underwear had crusty but you chose to ignore it.

She quickly fled the room through the connected bathroom as she quickly hides the panty in one of the drawers of her nightstand. She moved on her turning to her bed as she grabs some book and pretended to read as she hears your light knocking on her door. “Come in Bambi” you could her her mumble as you pushed the heavy wooden door open. Her nicknames never failing to make you want to melt. Your feet make their way across the floor before you take a seat on the side of Natashas bed. “What brings you here” her voice was husky coming out almost as a whisper. You had your eyes located on your lap as you could hear Natasha move behind you. “I felt lonely” You could hear her chuckle in response as she moves beside you. “Is Steve home” You shook your head “He said that he won’t be home till late at night today”

Natashas smirk was devilish as she knew now was the time she could finally shoot her shoot. “And he left you all alone with me?” You didn’t answer her. The question was more rhetorical than anything. “Tell me pretty girl” her hands moved to your chin making you meet her lustful gaze “Do you feel something 'down there' when I touch you” Your cheeks turned a light shade of red. You were too embarrassed to say it but she was right. You slowly nod and making Natasha the happiest woman alive. “What do you do then” “W-Well I-” Natasha cut you off “No Олененок I want you to show me. Show me what you do to make those feelings go away” Your movements were shaky as you laid your fragile body on her kingsized bed. Your hands had found their way towards the waistband of your shorts as you slowly dragged them down your feminine legs. You had revealed your undergarments, a white pair with flowers on them. Natasha smirked as she saw the pair. She was familiar with it once having right her under her hips as she wished she had you instead. However her time had come, she had finally had you all to herself. You disposed of your panty too as you left your dripping cunt on full display for Natasha who was sitting between your spread ankles. Her breathing got more rapid as she could feel herself het harder and harder. Your hands had found their way towards your clit rubbing the bundle of nerves in tight circles as you kept releasing moan after. Natasha looked at you with a pitiful expression it was clear that you didn’t really knew what you were doing. The older woman highly doubt that you’ve ever managed to made yourself cum judging by your inexperienced movements.

“Let me help you pretty girl” Natasha was fast to strip from her shirt throwing it somewhere behind herself as she moved between your legs. Your legs were thrown over her shoulder as she took a long lick from the bottom of your cunt right up to your clit. Your hands carefully grabbed Natashas hair not wanting to hurt her. Natasha kitten licking between your folds, the taste making her hum deeply. The vibrations making you release soft moans. You tried to buckle your hips making the release seem closer. Natasha responded in slamming her forearm down on your hips grounding your hips. You whimpered and Natasha just laughed “Have you ever tried to you know use your little fingers Зайка” she mumbled against your puffy cunt. Forming words seemed incredibly difficult even through Natasha hadn’t really done anything “N-Never” you managed to get out. Natasha gave you a fake look of pity between your legs “Let’s pop that cherry shall we?” It was again a rhetorical question, how could you ever say no to Natasha. “Will it hurt” I whimpered looking at Natasha through hooded eyes. “Зайка, I’m not gonna lie it will hurt a bit but you will feel so good” She rubbed my thighs trying comfort me into believing her and I did.

“Do it… but be gentle… please” the last part came out mote desperate than you had intended to. “I’ll try Зайка” she whispered against the soft flesh of My stomach kissing her way down again. She carefully inserted one of her long fingers making me groan in pain as she ripped my hymen even drawing a few drops of blood on the white sheets. Natasha groaned as she saw and felt it. She knew it was wrong being obsessed with taking her friends daughters virginity but she couldn’t help herself. ���Fuck baby you’re so tight” he breathed out as she can feel your walls clenching around her finger as she pushed it in and out. The pain of her fingers soon turned into pure pleasure as you moaned like a whore in a brothel. She added a second finger on which you clench down even harder sucking her in. “Fuck you’re even tighter then you thought you little slut.” Her movements got faster and rougher having me moan louder as you climax all over Natashas fingers and hand. You eyes are glued shut as you try to calm yourself.

You can feel Natashas strong hands on your hips turning you onto your stomach. Your face is pressed into the pillows as she pushes your hips up your knees touching the soft fabric of the sheets. You can hear the sipper of her pants followed by the sounds of her undressing. Natasha was painfully hard, her large member standing proud as she places herself behind you. Her tip pressed against your clit as you whimpered for her. “Are you ready for the real deal Зайка” She didn’t give you much time to respond as she pushed inside your hole making you scream out only for it to be muffled by the pillow case. She bottomed you out giving you some time to adjust to her girth. She whispered sweet nothings against you back until you gave her the go to go further.

Her pace started out slow not wanting to make you uncomfortable as the wet sound of skin clapping against each other filled the room mixed with both your groans and moans. Natasha pace was steady as the moans you released got louder and louder. Natashas hands gripped the flesh of you ass kneeling it before she got an idea. She spread your cheeks giving her the perfect look at your muscle ring. She spit on it only making you consciously of her actions. “Natty what are yo-” you got interrupted by your own scream as Natashas finger pushed past the ring the spit and your cum making a perfect lube. You clammed down hard in Natashas shaft as you were unexpectedly an anal whore. Your moans turned into screams the mixture of both penetrations making you climax in recored time. “Fuck you dirty slut you can deem yourself lucky I haven’t made you my breeding bitch yet” she mumbled pulling out of both holes before roughly throwing you to your back again. After a few more pumps with her large hands she came all of your stomach before laying down next to you.

She didn’t need long to recover from her high as she pushed some sweaty strands of hair behind your ear smiling like she didn’t just turn you into her whore. “Are you still lonely” you shook your head being too tired to even speak. She finally kissed your lips before picking you up bridal style and caring you into your shared bathroom. “Let’s get you cleaned up in a nice and warm bath shall we baby” she was just the woman for you.

:)

[natsaffection]

Wait and Hope. Pt 2 | N.R

Warnings: gun shots, blood, gore 'traumatized' children, just angst

Word Count: 9,8k

A/n: Okay, it's a lot..The Request you can find here.

The first few weeks after Lila, Jacob, and Mia moved in were an emotional whirlwind. Mia adapted quickly, her boundless energy and cheerful nature filling the house with light. She often clung to you and Natasha, seeking your warmth and affection, while Jacob remained quieter, but slowly began to open up. But Lila..Lila was different. You and Natasha had expected some challenges. Lila was, after all, fifteen and had been through more than any teenager should. But as the days turned into weeks, it became clear that Lila's walls were still firmly in place, and she wasn't ready to tear them down anytime soon.

Natasha, who had taken on the role of disciplinarian, had set clear boundaries from the start. She was strict but fair, and the kids quickly learned that pushing those boundaries or talking back wouldn't get them very far. Lila start to respect Natasha, yet there was still a certain distance, an unspoken agreement that Natasha wouldn't push too hard as long as Lila didn't push back. But you..you were also different. You were the heart of the family, always warm, always understanding, always trying to reach Lila with kindness and patience. And that's where the problems began. Lila wasn't ready for that kind of affection, not from someone she still saw as a stranger, and her rejection often manifested in anger. It had been a long day, filled with the usual ups and downs of settling into a new routine.

Natasha had just returned from work and found you in the kitchen, preparing dinner. The tension in the air was palpable, and Natasha could sense that something was wrong. "What happened?" Natasha asked gently, stepping beside you and placing a hand on your back. You sighed, your shoulders sagging slightly. "Lila and I had another argument.." you admitted, your voice tinged with frustration and sadness. "She shut me out again, and when I tried to talk to her about it, she just..exploded." Natasha frowned, her protective instincts kicking in. "What did she say?"

You hesitated, clearly reluctant to relive the exchange. "She told me to stop pretending I care, that I'm not her real mother, and that I don't understand anything she's been through." you said quietly, your voice cracking slightly. Natasha's heart ached for you, knowing how hard you had been trying to connect with Lila. She wrapped her arms around you, pulling you into a comforting embrace. "I'm sorry, Detka.." Natasha murmured, her voice filled with empathy. "Lila's hurting, and she's taking it out on you because she doesn't know how else to cope."

"I know." you whispered as you leaned into Natasha's embrace. "But it's so hard, Nat. I just want her to see that we love her and that we're here for her. But no matter what I do, it feels like I can't get through to her." Natasha tightened her embrace, her heart breaking for the woman she loved. "You're doing everything right." she said gently. "It's just going to take time. Lila's been through a lot, and she's scared. She's not used to people being kind to her without expecting something in return."

You nodded as you tried to hold back your tears. "I'm so proud that the kids are bonding with you, especially since you were the one who was most worried about it. But..I can't help feeling like I'm failing somehow." Natasha pulled back slightly, cupping your face in her hands and looking into your eyes with unwavering love. "You're not failing." she said firmly. "You're the heart of this family, Y/n. The kids are struggling right now, but they will open up. And when they do, it will be because you never stopped believing in them."

You sniffled, a small, sad smile tugging at your lips. "I hope so." you whispered. "I really hope so." At that moment, you both heard a door slam upstairs, followed by the sound of quick, stomping footsteps in the hallway. Natasha sighed, knowing that Lila was in one of her moods again. She pressed a quick kiss to your forehead. "I'll go talk to her." Natasha said gently. "You can finish up here, okay?" You nodded, grateful for Natasha's support. "Thank you." you whispered. Natasha gave you a reassuring smile before heading upstairs. She found Lila in her room, sitting on her bed with her arms crossed, her expression set in a defiant scowl. “Hey..” Natasha said, her voice calm but firm. “We need to talk.” Lila looked up, her eyes flashing with anger. “What?” she snapped. “What now?”

Natasha wasn’t fazed by Lila’s hostility. “You need to stop taking your anger out on Y/n.” she said, her tone measured. “I know you’re going through a lot, and I know you’re hurting, but she is trying to help you. She doesn’t deserve to be treated like this.” Lila’s expression faltered for a moment, a fleeting look of guilt crossing her face before it hardened again. “I didn’t ask for her help.” Lila muttered, her voice full of bitterness. “I didn’t ask for any of this.”

“I know.” Natasha responded, her voice softening. “But this is your reality now. We are your family, and we’re here for you, whether you like it or not. Y/n cares about you, and she’s trying so hard to make this work. You need to meet her halfway.” Lila looked away, her jaw clenched tightly. “I don’t need a new family.” she mumbled, her voice barely audible.

Natasha sighed, feeling the weight of Lila’s pain. “Maybe not.” she said quietly. “But that doesn’t change the fact that you have one now. And part of that family is Y/n. She’s not trying to replace anyone in your life, she just wants to be there for you.” Lila didn’t respond, but Natasha could see the inner conflict in her eyes. She was struggling, torn between her fear of being hurt again and her deep, unspoken desire for closeness.

“I’m not asking you to change overnight.” Natasha continued, her voice gentle. “But I’m asking you to try. Give her a chance. She’s not going away, and neither am I.” Lila’s shoulders slumped slightly, the fight gradually leaving her. She said nothing, but Natasha knew the message had been received. It would take time, but Natasha was willing to wait, to keep pushing until Lila was ready to let them in.

“Okay.” Natasha said softly as she slowly moved toward the door. “Take some time to cool off. We’ll talk later.” She left Lila’s room, her heart heavy from the weight of the conversation. She knew this wasn’t the end of the struggle, but she hoped it was a step in the right direction.

When Natasha returned to the kitchen, you were setting the table for dinner, your expression a mixture of sadness and determination. Natasha walked up to you, wrapped her arms around your waist, and rested her chin on your shoulder. “How did it go?” you asked quietly as you leaned into Natasha’s embrace. “It went as well as it could.” Natasha replied, her voice filled with quiet confidence. “She’s still hurting, but I think she’s starting to understand that we’re not going to give up.”

You sighed and closed your eyes for a moment. “I just wish I knew how to help her.” you murmured. “You’re already helping her.” Natasha said gently. “Just by being here, by being patient, by showing her love even when she pushes you away. It’s not easy, but you’re doing exactly what she needs.”

You nodded, your heart still heavy, but you felt a renewed sense of determination rising within you. “I’m not going to give up..” you whispered. “I won’t give up on any of them.” Natasha smiled, kissed your cheek. “And neither will I.” she said softly. “We’re in this together, Y/n. We’ll make it through, one day at a time.”

Months passed and Mia had quickly settled in, her cheerful nature and boundless energy bringing a light into the house that you and Natasha greatly appreciated. Jacob, though quieter, had also begun to open up and was gradually finding his place in the family. Since you allowed him to buy his own things, you both stumbled over piles of books every day,. But Lila? She was still struggling. The walls she had built around herself remained firmly in place, and despite all of your and Natasha’s efforts, she seemed determined to keep you both at a distance. It was a constant source of tension in the house, especially between Lila and you, as you bore the brunt of Lila’s anger and frustration.

One evening, Natasha was in the kitchen preparing dinner, while you were just on your way to join her. Mia was sitting at the table, doodling on a piece of paper, and Jacob was nearby, quietly reading a book. The atmosphere was calm, a peaceful routine that you had worked hard to establish. As Natasha stirred a pot on the stove, she heard Mia’s small, sweet voice call out, “Mommy, can you help me with this?”

Natasha’s heart skipped a beat, her hand pausing mid-motion. She turned to see Mia holding up her pencil with a confused expression, waiting for Natasha to come over. It took Natasha a moment to process what she had just heard. Mommy..Mia had called her mommy! The word hit Natasha like a wave, the weight of it filling her chest with a mix of emotions she wasn’t prepared for. She had been so focused on making sure the kids felt safe and loved that she hadn’t expected this moment hadn’t expected one of the children to call her by that name.

“Mommy?” Mia repeated, looking up at Natasha with wide, innocent eyes. Natasha blinked, quickly collecting herself and forcing a smile. “Of course, sweetheart..” she said, trying to keep her voice steady as she walked over to the table. She crouched down next to Mia and helped her with the drawing, but her mind was spinning, her heart filled with a mixture of joy and vulnerability.

You noticed the change in Natasha’s demeanor, how her eyes were a little brighter than usual, and you knew what had happened. You reached out, placing a comforting hand on Natasha’s arm and giving her an encouraging smile. Both of you had been waiting for this moment, and now that it had come, it was as overwhelming as it was beautiful. But the quiet joy of the moment didn’t last long. As Natasha returned to the stove, she heard the front door slam shut. Her heart sank, knowing that could only mean one thing. Lila was home.

You sighed, your expression growing more serious as you stood up. “Let me handle this.” you said quietly, knowing it would likely lead to another confrontation. Natasha looked at you sympathetically. “Do you want me to come with you?” she offered, knowing how difficult these moments were for you.

But you shook your head, determination in your eyes. “No, I need to do this.” you said gently. “She needs to know that I’m not going anywhere, no matter how much she tries to push me away.” Natasha nodded, watching you with a mix of admiration and concern as you left the kitchen and headed upstairs. She could hear the music blasting from Lila’s room, a clear sign that she was trying to shut out the world.

You knocked on Lila’s door and waited for a response that didn’t come. You took a deep breath, opened the door, and stepped inside. Lila was sitting on her bed, earbuds in, her face set in a grim expression as she stared at her phone. She didn’t even look up as you entered. “Lila.” you began, your voice calm but firm. Lila didn’t react, her fingers angrily tapping on her phone as if to drown out your voice. You moved closer and gently placed a hand on Lila’s shoulder to get her attention.

“Lila, please.” you said, your voice softening. “Can we just talk?” In that moment, Lila exploded. She ripped the earbuds out of her ears and turned to you, her eyes blazing with anger. “leave me alone!” she snapped. “Stop pretending you care because we both know it’s not true!” You recoiled slightly, the words hitting you like a physical blow. But you didn’t back down. You had heard this before, you had felt the sting of Lila’s rejection countless times. But you weren’t going to give up, not now, not ever.

“That’s not true.” you said, your voice trembling but determined. “I care about you. We both do. And I’m not pretending. I want you to feel safe here, to know that this is your home.” Lila scoffed, crossing her arms over her chest in a defensive posture. “Home? This isn’t my h-home. It’s just another place I’m stuck until you decide you don’t want me anymore..!” Your heart broke at Lila’s words, at the deep-seated pain and mistrust they revealed. You knew Lila had been through so much, that she had every reason to doubt the stability of her situation. But that didn’t make the words any less painful.

“That’s not going to happen.” you said, your voice filled with quiet resolve. “We’re not going to give up on you. No matter how hard it gets, no matter how much you try to push us away, we’re here. And we’re staying.” Lila’s eyes flashed with anger, her voice rising in frustration. “Why? Why do you even care? I’m just a burden to you, right? You’ve already got Jacob and Mia, so why do you even need me?” Lila finished, her voice cracking under the weight of her emotions.

Your eyes filled with tears, but you fought to keep them from falling, refusing to show Lila just how much her words hurt. “Because you’re part of our family!” you said, your voice trembling with emotion. “You, Jacob, and Mia, you’re all part of our family, and that means we love you, no matter what.” For a moment, Lila seemed to waver, her anger flickering as she looked into your eyes. But the years of pain and disappointment were too deep, too ingrained. She shook her head, her expression hardening again. “I don’t need your love..” she muttered, turning away from you. “Just leave me alone..please..”

You stood there for a long moment, your heart heavy with the weight of the conversation. You wanted so badly to reach Lila, to break through the walls she had built around herself. But you knew that it wouldn’t happen overnight. It would take time..time, patience, and a love that wouldn’t give up, no matter how much she resisted. Finally, you sighed and took a step back. “Alright.” you said quietly. “I’ll give you some space. But I want you to know that I’m here, whenever you’re ready.”

You turned and left the room, closing the door behind you with a soft click. As you made your way back downstairs, you felt the tears you had been holding back begin to fall. You quickly wiped them away, not wanting to break down in front of the children. When you returned to the kitchen, Natasha was waiting for you, her expression full of concern.

Without a word, she pulled you into a tight embrace, holding you close as the emotions of the day finally overwhelmed you. “You’re exactly what she needs, you know? She just doesn’t realize it yet. But she will, Y/n. I promise you, she will.” You clung to Natasha, finding strength in the quiet presence of your partner. Despite the challenges, despite the heartache, it was undeniably comforting to know that you weren’t facing this alone. You had each other, and that was enough to keep you going.

As the evening progressed, you both tried to push the tension aside and focus on the positive moments. Dinner passed quietly as Mia and Jacob chatted softly about their day at school. Mia, as always, was full of energy, telling stories about her friends and her new favorite game, while Jacob listened more than he spoke, but with a calmness that reassured you and Natasha that he was finding his way.

Lila, however, remained in her room, the door closed, shutting herself off from the world. Your heart ached every time you glanced down the hallway, wishing you could somehow reach through that door and pull Lila into the warmth of the family. But you knew it wasn’t that simple. Lila needed time, and more importantly, she needed to feel that she could come to you on her own terms.

After dinner, you and Natasha took the younger kids to bed. Mia was eager for her bedtime story, snuggling up to you with her favorite stuffed bear. As you read, her eyes slowly drifted shut, the words of the story lulling her into a peaceful sleep. Natasha tucked Jacob into bed, sitting with him for a few minutes as he quietly told her about a book he was reading. She listened attentively, offering encouragement and gentle advice, her heart swelling with pride as he began to open up more, sharing his thoughts and feelings in small but meaningful ways.

When the children were finally asleep, you and Natasha found yourselves alone in the living room, the house quiet except for the occasional creak of the floorboards or the distant hum of the refrigerator. You sat together on the couch, the weight of the day heavy on your shoulders. Natasha wrapped an arm around you, holding you close. “You’re helping them more than you realize.” she murmured. “Just by being here, by being patient. They been through so much, and they had to protect themselves for so long. And Lila maybe doesn’t know how to let people in, but she will. She’s starting to see that we’re not going anywhere.”

You nodded, though the doubt still lingered in your heart. “I just wish I could do more.” you said quietly. “You’re doing everything you can.” Natasha reassured you, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. “And that’s enough. We’ll keep being there for her, for all of them. And one day, Lila will realize that she’s not alone anymore.” You closed your eyes and let yourself relax in Natasha’s embrace. “Thank you.” you whispered, your voice full of gratitude. “For being so strong, for holding us all together.”

Natasha smiled, her heart swelling with love for you. “We hold each other together.” she said gently. “We’re a team, Y/n. And nothing will change that.” As you sat there, wrapped up in each other, the weight of the day began to lift. The challenges you were facing were real, and there would be more difficult days ahead, but there was also hope..hope that your love and determination would be enough to carry you through.

5 months had passed since the Kids had come into your lives, and while some things had improved, others remained heartbreakingly stagnant. Jacob and Lila had gradually opened up to Natasha, and over time, both had begun to call her “Mom.” She had never imagined herself in this role, but now that she heard those words, everything felt so much more real. But you still found yourself on the outside. Mia had also completely bonded with you, with the same boundless affection she always showed. But Jacob and Lila had yet to overcome that final hurdle. They hadn’t opened up to you in the same way they had with Natasha, and every time they called her “Mom” without including you, it chipped away at your heart a little more.

You tried not to let it show, tried to stay strong and hopeful. You knew that these things took time, and you didn’t want to rush them. But as the days turned into weeks, the constant reminder of your position on the sidelines began to wear you down. In this fragile time, you received an unexpected call from Nick. You and Natasha had all but retired from active duty, focusing on raising your new family. You had only agreed to take on missions when absolutely necessary, when no one else could do the job. But this mission was one of those cases. Fury’s voice was firm, almost apologetic, as he explained the situation.

“I wouldn’t be calling if it wasn’t absolutely necessary.” Fury said over the secure line. “But this mission requires your particular set of skills. We need both of you.” You and Natasha exchanged a look, both feeling the weight of the request. You had built a new life, a stable life for your children, and the thought of leaving them, even temporarily, felt like tearing apart the foundation you had worked so hard to build.

“We have a family now, Nick.” Natasha said, her voice strained with frustration. “You know that. We can’t just drop everything and go on a mission.”

“I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t critical, Natasha.” Fury responded, his tone serious. “I know this is hard, but you’re the best we have for this job. If there were another way, I’d take it.”

You felt a lump form in your throat, the pressure of the situation bearing down on you. You had always known that this was a possibility, that your previous lives as Avengers could come back at any time. But now, with your family still so fragile, it felt like the worst possible timing. “How long?” you asked, your voice tense with emotion.

“Two days.” Fury replied. “We’ll have everything you need at the Compound. The kids will be safe and well taken care of.”

After a tense moment of silence, Natasha finally spoke. "We need to talk to the kids about this." she said, her voice resigned. "But we’ll do it." You looked at Natasha, the silent communication between you carrying the weight of your decision. You didn’t want to do this, didn’t want to leave your children, especially not when things were still so uncertain. But you also understood your responsibility, the trust Fury had placed in you, and the greater good you had always fought for.

That evening, the family gathered around the dinner table, the usual chatter quieter than normal. The weight of the day hung in the air, and even Mia seemed to sense that something was different. You cleared your throat and exchanged a glance with Natasha before speaking. "Kids, we need to talk to you about something important."

Mia’s eyes lit up with curiosity, while Jacob and Lila looked up from their plates, their expressions more guarded. "We got a call today from work." Natasha continued, her voice calm but tinged with a slight hesitancy. "There are some things we need to take care of." Mia’s excitement was immediate. "Are we coming too?" she asked, her voice filled with childlike wonder.

Natasha smiled gently and shook her head. "Not quite. You will come to work with us, yes. But we have to do the rest ourselves. You’ll stay there while we’re away, and we’ll be back as soon as we can." Jacob’s face brightened at the mention of the Avengers Compound. "Will we see the Avengers? The compound?!"

Natasha nodded, her heart aching at the thought of leaving them behind. "Yes," she said. "and we’ll make sure you’re safe and well taken care of while we’re gone." But Lila’s reaction was immediate and hostile. Her fork clattered against the plate as she dropped it, and her expression hardened. "So you’re just going to leave us there?" she snapped, her voice filled with anger and fear. "What if you don’t come back? What if this is just another way to get rid of us?"

Your heart sank at Lila’s words, the familiar sting of her mistrust cutting deep. "Lila, that’s not true." you said gently, trying to keep your voice steady. "This is just for the mission. We will come back, I promise you." But Lila wasn’t having it. She pushed her chair back and stood up, her eyes blazing with a mix of anger and betrayal. "That’s what you say now, but how do I know it’s true? You’re just like everyone else! Making promises you can’t keep."

Natasha reached out to Lila, her voice firm but gentle. "Lila, listen to me. We’re not like the people you’ve known before. We’re not going to leave you. This mission is something we have to do, but it’s just for two days. We will come back." Lila’s gaze fixed on Natasha, and for a moment, there was a flicker of vulnerability in her eyes. She opened her mouth to speak, but hesitated. When she finally did, her voice was quiet, almost trembling. "Mum, I don’t want you to go.."

The word hit Natasha like a blow to the chest. Lila had called her that a few times before, but the way she said it now, with such raw emotion, nearly broke her heart. Natasha wanted to hold her, to promise her that everything would be okay, but she knew it wasn’t that simple. You, standing beside Natasha, felt a sharp pang of pain. Lila had called Natasha "Mum" with such sincerity, and yet there was still a distance between her and you, a barrier that hadn’t been broken.

"We’ll come back, Lila." Natasha repeated, her voice firm but filled with emotion. "I promise you, we will come back." But Lila’s anger flared up again, defensive and protective of the wounds she still carried. "Promises mean nothing!" she snapped. "You’ll leave, and then you’ll realize you don’t want us anymore, and we’ll be right back where we started!"

Jacob and Mia watched in stunned silence, the tension at the table palpable. You felt the weight of the moment pressing down on you, the overwhelming feeling that no matter what you said, it wouldn’t be enough to ease Lila’s fears. She turned and stormed out of the room, the door slamming behind her and leaving a heavy silence in her wake. You stood there, your heart breaking as you stared at the closed door. You felt Natasha’s hand on your shoulder, a silent reassurance, but it did little to ease the pain in your chest.

Mia, ever the optimist, broke the silence with her soft, hopeful voice. "You’ll come back, won’t you?" she asked, her eyes wide and innocent. You forced a smile and knelt down to hug Mia tightly. "Yes, sweetheart." you whispered, your voice thick with emotion. "We’ll come back. I promise." Jacob, still sitting, looked at Natasha with a mixture of trust and uncertainty. "And you’ll be okay, right?" Natasha nodded and gently ran her fingers through his hair. "We’ll be okay." she said softly. "And we’ll come back to you. To all of you."

As the evening wore on, the atmosphere remained tense, the shadow of the upcoming mission hanging over you all. Natasha and you tried to maintain a semblance of normalcy, but the weight of the situation was impossible to ignore. Later that night, as you got ready for bed, you could no longer hold back your tears. You sat on the edge of the bed, your shoulders shaking as the emotions of the day finally overwhelmed you.

Natasha sat beside you, wrapping her arms around you, holding you close as the tears began to flow. You leaned into Natasha, your head resting on her shoulder as you let out all the pain and frustration you had been holding inside. "I don’t know what to do.." you whispered, your voice trembling. "This mission..I’m so scared that we’ll lose everything we’ve worked so hard for." Natasha tightened her embrace, her heart aching for you. She knew how much you had invested in this family, how desperately you had tried to connect with everyone, to be the mother they needed. But she also knew that some wounds took time to heal, and especially Lila’s wounds were deep.

"We’re not going to lose this." Natasha said firmly, her voice full of determination. "We’ve worked too hard, and we’re not going to let this mission take that away from us." You sniffled and wiped your eyes, trying to steady yourself. "I just wish I knew how to get through to them." you whispered. "Lila’s starting to trust you, and that’s wonderful, but I feel like.." You took a deep breath, trying to calm the storm of emotions inside you. "I want to believe in us." you said quietly. "But its so hard..."

Natasha kissed your forehead, her touch tender and soothing. "You don’t have to go through this alone." she whispered. "We’re a team, remember? We’ll get through this together." You nodded, feeling a glimmer of hope in your chest. "I know." you whispered. "And I’m so grateful for you, Nat. I don’t know how I’d get through this without you."

Natasha smiled, brushing a strand of hair away from your face. "You’d make it because you’re strong, stronger than you think. And we’ll make it through this, all of us, together." You sat there in silence for a while, holding each other close, finding comfort in the quiet strength of your bond. The challenges you were facing felt overwhelming, but there was a deep, unshakable love between you that kept you going.

After a while, Natasha spoke again, her voice gentle but resolute. "We need to talk to Fury before we leave." she said. "Make sure everything is set up for the kids while we’re gone. And we need to make it clear to him that this is the last time for a long time. Our family needs us here." You nodded, your resolve returning. "You’re right." you agreed. "This is the last time. We need to be here for the kids, especially now. They need to know they can rely on us."

"And they will." Natasha said, her voice firm. "We’ll do this mission, but after that, we’re done. Our family comes first." With that decision, you both felt a sense of calm settle over you. The upcoming mission still weighed heavily on you, but you now knew where your priorities lay, and you were ready to fight for what mattered most.

The next morning, you both rose early to make the final preparations. You called Fury and made it clear that this would be your last mission for the foreseeable future. Fury understood, and though his tone was brisk and professional, there was a note of respect in his voice. “We’ve got everything set up for you at the Compound.” Fury said. “And I’ll make sure the kids are well taken care of while you’re on the mission. Maria has come forward to take care of them."

With heavy hearts, you and Natasha packed your bags, the reality of leaving your children, even temporarily, weighing heavily on you. But you proceeded with a clear goal in mind, the knowledge that this step was necessary to ensure the safety and protection of the world, a world you wanted to safeguard for your children. Before you left, you gathered the children in the living room. Lila sat on the edge of the sofa, her expression wary, while Jacob and Mia sat close to their parents, their faces a mix of excitement and nervousness. Maria already waiting for them.

Natasha knelt in front of them, her voice calm and steady. “We’re leaving now.” she said, her heart aching as she looked into their eyes. “But we’ll be back soon. While we’re gone, you’ll be safe at the Compound, and you’ll have everything you need.” You reached out and gently touched Lila’s arm, your voice soft. “Lila, I know this is hard, but we will come back. We promised you, and we’re going to keep that promise.”

Lila didn’t respond immediately, her eyes focused on the floor. But when she finally looked up, there was a faint glimmer of something in her expression, something you couldn’t quite decipher. “Be careful, please.." Lila murmured, her voice barely audible.

Natasha smiled, her heart swelling with emotion. “We will.” she promised. Mia, always a bright light, hugged both Natasha and you tightly. “Don’t forget us!” she whispered earnestly. “Never.” you whispered back, your voice full of love. Jacob, who had been quiet until then, finally spoke up. “I’ll take care of them, mum.” he said seriously, his small face determined. “I’ll make sure they’re okay.” Natasha felt her heart swell with pride as she ran a hand through Jacob’s hair. “I know you will, buddy.” she said softly. “You’re so brave.”

After a final round of hugs, Natasha and you stood up, ready to go. You looked at your children, your family knowing that you were leaving behind what was most important to you. But you also knew that you would return. As you walked out the door, you glanced back one last time, your heart heavy but resolute. Lila stood in the doorway, her arms crossed, watching you with an unreadable expression. You wanted to run back, to tell her again how much you loved her, how much you would miss her, but you knew this was a moment Lila needed to process on her own.

Natasha and you got into the car, your hands finding each other as you drove away from the house. The upcoming mission was crucial, but equally important was the promise you had made to yourselves, to each other, and to your children. You would come back. And when you did, you would continue to fight for your family, no matter how difficult it became.

The mission briefing was straightforward but dangerous. A covert Hydra base had been discovered in the heart of the city, suspected of holding critical information about upcoming terrorist attacks. Natasha and you were assigned to infiltrate the base while Steve and Bruce took care of the outside world. On paper, it was simple, but both of you knew how quickly things could go wrong.

Natasha glanced over at you, her concern evident in the furrow of her brow. "We can do this. One last time." You met her gaze and forced yourself to smile confidently. "I’ve got your back, Nat. Always." Natasha shook her head, though the worry didn’t leave her eyes. "Just stay close. We go in, we go out. No unnecessary risks." You knew what she was really saying: Don’t be a hero. But that was easier said than done when it came to Natasha. You’d do anything to protect her, even if it meant putting yourself in danger.

The Quinjet landed on a rooftop a few blocks from the Hydra base. The city was always quiet, the only sounds were the distant hum of traffic and occasional gusts of wind. Natasha led the way, moving with the silent grace of a predator, and you followed closely behind her. You descended a fire escape and disappeared into the shadows as you approached the building. The Hydra base was hidden beneath an abandoned warehouse, a perfect cover in a city full of forgotten buildings. Natasha scanned the area, her sharp eyes catching the faint glow of surveillance cameras hidden in the corners. She signaled to you, and you nodded in understanding. You had to be quick and silent, any alarm would mean a swarm of armed Hydra agents descending upon you.

With her Widow’s Bite, Natasha disabled the cameras one by one, clearing a path to the entrance. Your heart pounded in your chest as you approached, the weight of the mission heavy on you. You couldn’t shake the feeling that something was off, that you were walking into a trap. But you pushed the thought aside and focused on the task at hand. You reached the entrance, a steel door with a biometric lock. Natasha pulled a small device from her belt, attached it to the lock, and watched as it began bypassing the security system. The seconds dragged on, each one filled with the suffocating silence of anticipation. Finally, the device beeped, and the door slid open with a soft hiss.

You slipped inside, the darkness of the corridor swallowing you whole. Natasha led the way, her senses on high alert as you navigated the labyrinthine interior of the base. The air was thick with tension, every step bringing you closer to the heart of the Hydra operation. You reached a large, dimly lit room filled with computer terminals and stacks of documents. Natasha’s eyes locked onto the central console, where a data drive was inserted. "This is it." she whispered.

Your grip on your weapon as you positioned yourself by the door. Natasha moved quickly, her fingers flying over the keyboard as she initiated the data transfer. The seconds ticked by, each one a small victory as the progress bar crept closer to completion. But just as the transfer was nearly finished, your worst fear came true. The door to the room burst open, and a group of Hydra agents stormed in with weapons raised. You reacted instinctively, firing a shot that took down the lead agent before he could pull the trigger. Chaos erupted in the room, bullets flying as the two of you fought for your lives.

"Nat, we have to fall back!" you shouted over the noise, your voice laced with desperation. But Natasha was focused, too focused, her eyes locked on the last remaining agent standing between you and the exit. She went in for the kill, but in that split second, everything went wrong. The agent, a hulking figure with a cruel grin, raised his weapon and aimed directly at Natasha. Time seemed to slow as you recognized the danger. Without thinking, you threw yourself in front of her, your body acting on pure instinct. The gun fired, the noise deafening in the enclosed space.

The sharp crack of gunfire echoed in Natasha’s ears, a sound she had heard countless times before, but never with such devastating clarity. It was as if the world had frozen, everything narrowing down to that one terrible moment as you threw yourself in front of the bullets meant for Natasha. The world around her dissolved into chaos. She barely registered what she was doing as she took down the last enemies, her body moving on autopilot, but her mind was solely focused on the woman lying in a growing pool of blood.

"Y/n!!" Natasha’s voice was a rough, tortured cry that echoed off the cold metal walls of the base. She dropped to her knees beside you, her hands trembling as they hovered over your body, unsure where to touch, where to press, where to begin mending what had been so horribly destroyed. Blood. So much blood. It stained your clothes, your skin, and Natasha’s hands as she finally pressed down on the gunshot wounds, trying to staunch the unrelenting flow. The blood was warm, sticky, seeping through Natasha’s fingers no matter how hard she pressed, and it filled her with a fear she had never known before.

"Why did you do that?!" Natasha’s voice quivered with a mix of anger and despair, her green eyes blazing as they met yours. "I told you to be careful! Why didn’t you listen to me!" Your breathing was shallow, each breath a painful struggle. Your face was pale, your eyes glassy as you looked up at Natasha, a gentle, sad smile playing on your lips. "I couldn’t… let him.." you whispered, your voice weak but resolute. "I had to protect you."

Natasha’s heart clenched painfully in her chest, a sob threatening to break free as she pressed harder on the wounds, desperately trying to stop the blood, trying to keep your life from slipping through her fingers. "You’re an idiot!" she choked out, her voice breaking as tears streamed down her cheeks, mixing with the blood on her hands. "You stupid idiot. You should have let-" She cut herself off, her throat closing up as the truth hit her like a sledgehammer. She had failed. She had failed to protect the woman she loved more than anything in this world.

Your hand, trembling and weak, reached to Natasha’s hands, "Don’t blame yourself.." you whispered, your voice barely a shadow of its former strength. "You couldn’t have known..Please, don’t blame yourself."

But Natasha couldn’t hear you, not over the deafening roar of her own guilt. She reached for her radio, her hands slick with blood as she brought the device to her lips. "I need a MedEvac now!" she called out, her voice breaking with desperation. "She’s been shot- two bullets to the chest, she’s losing too much blood!" She dropped the radio, her hands returning to your wounds, pressing down with all her might, even though she knew it wasn’t enough. She could feel your life slipping away, like sand through her fingers, and it was tearing her apart.

Your hand, weak but determined, found its way to your chest, pressing against one of the gunshot wounds. Your fingers came back bloody, and you stared at them, a strange sense of calm washing over you. "It’s..a lot.." you murmured, almost to yourself, your voice distant, as if you were already slipping away. "Don’t look." Natasha pleaded, her voice shaking as she gently took your hand and pulled it away from the wound. "Don’t look, just focus on me. Look at me, Y/n."

Your eyes flickered back to Natasha, your gaze softening as you saw the tear-streaked face of your wife. "Nat..it’s okay." you whispered, your voice growing weaker with every word. "I love you..I love our kids..Tell th-"

"Stop it." Natasha snapped, her voice hardening with a desperation that bordered on hysteria. "You’re going to tell them yourself. You’re going to be fine. We’re going to go home, and you’re going to see them. You’re going to hold them in your arms, and you’re going to be fine. Do you hear me? You’re going to be fine!" Your eyes grew heavy, the pain and exhaustion too much to fight against. But you could still hear Natasha’s voice, that beautiful, strong voice that had always made you feel safe.

Natasha had to keep you awake. She had to make you talk, keep you focused, keep you alive. "The Kids are waiting for us." Natasha began, her voice trembling but determined. "Mia..shes probably drawing on the walls, and lets Maria wipe it away.." Natasha continued, forcing a smile despite the tears streaming down her face. "She never listens when it comes to her art. And Jacob..he’s probably curled up in that old chair, reading another one of his books. He’s so thoughtful, so kind. Just like you"

Your lips twitched in the faintest hint of a smile, your eyelids fluttering as you struggled to stay awake. "Lila’s probably got her headphones on, blasting that awful music she’s into these days.." Natasha said, trying to keep her voice light even as her heart shattered with every passing second. "She thinks it’s cool, even though it drives us all crazy. But she’s strong, just like you. She’ll be okay."

You managed a weak chuckle, but it quickly turned into a wince of pain. Natasha’s grip on your hand tightened, her other hand still pressing desperately against your wound. "Natasha, I’m so..proud of them.. proud of you.."

"And I’m proud of you." Natasha whispered back, her voice cracking as she leaned closer, her forehead resting gently against yours. "You’re the strongest person I’ve ever known, Y/n. You’re going to get through this. You have to." But despite her words, she could feel your life slipping away, your breaths becoming shallower, your skin growing colder. Panic clawed at her insides, a deep, primal fear that she had never felt before. "Stay with me!" she pleaded, her voice breaking. "Please, stay with me. I can’t lose you. I can’t do this without you!"

Your eyes opened one last time, meeting Natasha’s gaze with a softness that broke her heart. "I love you." you whispered, your voice so faint it was almost lost in the air. "I’m sorry..I couldn’t-"

"Please, no." she whispered, her voice choked with sobs as she held you close, her tears mixing with the blood that stained both of you. "Don’t leave me, Y/n. Please…" The world seemed to narrow down to the sound of Natasha's frantic breathing, the steady dripping of blood on the floor, and your weakening heartbeat that she felt under her trembling hands. The walls of the Hydra base seemed to close in around her, the oppressive silence only broken by the distant echoes of their previous fight.

But then, there was sudden movement, heavy footsteps echoed on the concrete floor, voices shouting commands. The door to the room flew open, and Natasha barely registered who it was until she heard Bruce's voice. "Natasha! Step aside, let me through!" Bruce's voice was firm, but there was an urgency in it that Natasha had never heard before.

Natasha didn't want to let you go, couldn't let you go but she forced herself to move just enough to allow Bruce to kneel beside you, his first-aid kit already in hand. His face was hardened with determination as he quickly examined your wounds. His eyes met Natasha's for a brief moment, filled with something she couldn't name and didn't want to name. "This doesn't look good.." Bruce muttered quietly as he pulled out an improvised bandage and pressed it firmly against the wounds to stop the blood flow. You groaned in pain, your body jerking under his hands.

"Stay with us, Y/n.." Bruce said, his voice deep and calm, though Natasha could hear the pressure beneath it. "I need you here, okay? I'll do everything I can, but you need to hold on." Steve appeared in the doorway, his faces serious and tense as he took in the situation. Steve acted quickly, his gaze hardening as he recognized the severity of your injuries. "We need to get her out of here, immediately." he said, his voice leaving no room for argument.

"Steve, be careful." Natasha warned, her voice laced with fear as she watched him kneel beside you. She knew what needed to be done, but the thought of you being moved, the pain it would cause you, made her stomach twist with anxiety. Bruce looked up at Steve, his face grave. "I've managed to slow the bleeding, but it's not enough. We need to get her to the Quinjet quickly, she doesn't have much time left."

Steve nodded, his jaw clenched as he carefully slipped his arms under your limp body. The moment he lifted you, your eyes shot open, and a blood-curdling scream escaped your throat, raw and filled with agony. Your hands clawed at Steve's arms, your fingers digging in as the pain shot through your body like fire.

"I know it hurts." Steve said, his voice strained as he tried to keep you calm. "But we have to move you. We have to get you to the jet." Natasha was immediately by your side, her hands reaching for yours, her voice soft and soothing as she tried to calm you. "I'm here, Malysh. I'm here. Hold on, okay? Focus on my voice. We're getting you out of here."

Your eyes were wide with pain, your breaths coming in short, gasping bursts as Steve carried you toward the exit. Natasha kept pace beside you, her heart breaking at every tortured sound that escaped your lips. "Think of the kids, Y/n." Natasha murmured, her voice trembling but determined. "Lila, Mia, and Jacob, they're waiting for us. We're going home to them. You just have to hold on a little longer."

Your grip on Natasha's hand tightened, your eyes finding hers as if drawing strength from her words. "I'm..I'm trying," you gasped, your voice barely audible, but Natasha could hear the desperation, the fear. "You're doing so well, baby.." Natasha whispered, her own voice breaking. "You're so strong. Just a little bit more, I promise. We're almost there."

The Quinjet came into view, the cargo door already open, and Bruce was shouting instructions to Sam, who was preparing the medical area for emergency treatment. Steve moved as quickly as he could, his face set in determination, while your blood soaked through his uniform. Natasha stayed close to you, her hand never leaving yours, her voice a steady stream of reassurance even as her own fear threatened to choke her. "We're almost there. Just a few more steps."

Your eyes fluttered, your strength fading fast as Steve carried you up the ramp into the jet. As soon as they were inside, Bruce was there, helping Steve to gently lay you on the medical bed. The moment your back touched the bed, you screamed again, your body convulsing with pain.

Bruce moved with controlled urgency, his hands flying over the medical equipment as the jet's engines roared to life. "We need to stabilize her." he said, more to himself than the others. He inserted an IV, pumping fluids into your body to counter the blood loss. "Her pulse is weak, Natasha, keep talking to her. Don't let her drift away."

Natasha nodded, her tears flowing freely now as she leaned over you, her lips close to your ear. "You're doing so well. I'm so proud of you. Keep your eyes on me, okay? Just look at me." Your eyes fluttered open, glassy with pain, but you managed to focus on Natasha, your lips trembling as you tried to speak. "I..love you.." you whispered, your voice so weak that Natasha had to strain to hear it.

"I love you too." Natasha whispered back, her heart breaking at the sight of your pale, bloodless face. "So much. You're going to be okay. You have to be okay." But even as she spoke, Natasha could see the life fading from your eyes, your body growing colder under her touch. And then, in a moment that would haunt Natasha forever, your eyes rolled back, and the heart monitor emitted a long, shrill beep.

"Y-Y/n?" Natasha's voice was a broken whisper, her hands shaking as she shook your lifeless body. "No, no, no..Bruce do something!" He was already moving, his face pale as he grabbed the defibrillator paddles. "We're losing her! Clear!" The shock jolted your body, but the heart monitor remained flat, its unbroken tone slicing through the air like a knife. Natasha's breath caught in her throat, her entire body filled with cold terror. "No! You can't leave me! You can't leave me!"

Bruce pressed the paddles to your chest again, his voice tight with concentration. "Clear!" Your body convulsed with the shock, but still nothing. Natasha felt something inside her break, her knees giving out as she clung to your hand, her tears falling onto your still, lifeless body. "Don't do this!" Natasha sobbed, her voice breaking. "Please..I can't lose you. I need you!"

Bruce was relentless, refusing to give up as he administered another shock. "Come on, Y/n!" he muttered through gritted teeth. "Come on." Ad then, like a miracle, there was a flicker on the monitor..a weak but present heartbeat. Natasha's breath caught, hope flooding her like a wave. Bruce immediately switched tactics, working quickly to stabilize you, his hands moving with a speed that only came from years of practice.

"She's back.." Bruce said, his voice trembling with relief but also with the realization of how fragile this life still was. "But she's not out of the woods yet. We need to get her to the MedBay immediately." The Quinjet accelerated to full speed, racing toward Avengers Compound. Natasha stayed by your side the entire time, her hand gripping yours so tightly her knuckles turned white. "You can't do this to me again, you hear me?" she whispered urgently, as tears continued to stream down her face. "Do you hear me, Y/n! You can't leave me."

Natasha held on to the faint pulse under her fingers, to the fragile heartbeat that was all that kept her world from completely shattering. The flight back to the Compound felt like an eternity, every second stretching out as Natasha watched Bruce work, her heart heavy as a stone in her chest. But she refused to let you go, refused to let you slip away again. She kept talking to you, whispering promises, clinging to the hope that somehow, someway, they would make it through this. The Quinjet landed with a jolt on the grounds of the Compound, the ramp lowering before the engines had fully powered down. Natasha didn't wait for the jet to come to a complete stop, she was on her feet immediately, running alongside the gurney where you lay, pale and motionless, as Bruce and a team of medics rushed you into the medical wing.

The blood seeping through the hastily applied bandages was a constant reminder of the bullets that had torn through your body. Natasha's hands were still stained with that blood, her mind fogged with fear and despair as she clung to the edge of the gurney, her eyes never leaving your face for a moment.

The medics burst through the doors of the medical wing, but in that moment, Natasha's breath caught. In the hallway, eyes wide with fear and horror, stood her children. Lila, Jacob, and Mia. They were supposed to be with Maria! Safe and far away from the nightmare that was unfolding. But there they were, huddled together, their faces pale with fear and confusion. They must have sensed that something was wrong, must have noticed the change in the air when the Quinjet landed.

“Mom!” called Lila, her voice cracking under the weight of fear and anger. “What happened?? Is Y/n okay??” Jacob clung Lilas arm, his face contorted with worry. “Why is there so much blood?” he asked, his voice trembling. “What happened to her?” Mia, held onto Lila's other arm, her big eyes filled with tears as she looked up at Natasha. “Why are there so many poeple?” she whispered, her voice small and full of fear. Natasha's heart broke at the sight of the Kids, standing there so vulnerable and scared. This was the last thing she wanted..that they had to see you like this, that they had to be exposed to this kind of fear. She wanted to protect them, to shield them from the harsh realities of the life she led, but there was no time to think, no time to find the right words.

The medics paused for a brief moment, a fleeting second, as they maneuvered the gurney through the door. In that instant, the Kids saw you, your ashen face, the blood-soaked bandages, the way your body lay motionless and lifeless. It was only a brief moment, but it was enough. Mia let out a small, sharp cry. She turns to Lila's to press her face into hers and Jacob's eyes widened, his grip on Lila's arm tightened until his knuckles turned white. Even Lila, who was trying so hard to be brave, took a step back, her face drained of all color.

“oh my god, what happened?!” Lila asked, her voice rising in panic. “Why does she look like that? What’s going on?” Natasha felt her throat tighten, her breath catching in her chest. She needed to be with you, needed to be by your side as the doctors fought for your life. But she couldn’t leave the kids like this, couldn’t just walk away without giving them some kind of explanation, some kind of comfort. She knelt in front of them, her hands reaching out to pull them close. “Listen to me.” she said, her voice trembling with the effort to stay calm. “Y/n..she's very badly hurt, but the doctors are going to do everything they can to help her. You need to stay with Maria now, okay? I have to be with her.”

Mia's tears spilled over, her little hands clutching at Natasha's suit. “But why did she get hurt?" Jacob was crying now too, silent tears streaming down his face as he shook his head. “I don’t want her to die, mum. I don’t want her to die..” Lila, her face pale and drawn, looked up at Natasha, her eyes a mixture of fear and anger. “She won't, will she?” she asked, her voice breaking. “Why did this even happen to her and not to you?”

The question hit Natasha like a physical blow, the guilt she had been trying to suppress rising up and choking her. How could she explain this? How could she make them understand that you had taken those bullets for them, that she had made the ultimate sacrifice because she believed they needed Natasha more? But there was no time. The medics began to move again, pushing the gurney through the doors and out of sight. Natasha’s heart twisted painfully as she looked at her children, their tear-streaked faces filled with confusion and fear.

“I promise I’ll explain everything.” Natasha whispered, her voice thick with tears. “But right now, I have to be with her. Please..please stay with Maria. I’ll come back as soon as I can.” She pulled back a little and looked directly at Lila, who was trying so hard to hold it together. “Lila.” she said, her voice firm but full of urgency, “I need you to be strong now. Your brother and sister are going to need you. I need you to take care of them while I’m with Y/n. Can you do that for me?”

Lila’s eyes widened, the weight of what Natasha was asking settling on her young shoulders. She hesitated, fear and uncertainty flashing in her eyes, but then she nodded, her jaw setting in determination. “I can do it.” she said, her voice steady despite the tears she was fighting back. “I’ll take care of them.” Natasha reached out, cupping her face with one hand, her thumb brushing away a stray tear. “Thank you." She whispered, her voice filled with gratitude and love. “I know it’s a lot to ask, but I trust you, Lila. I need to know they’re safe with you.”

Lila nodded again, this time more decisively, and took Jacob and Mia’s hands, squeezing them reassuringly. “We’ll be okay, Mom. You go take care of Y/n.” Natasha swallowed hard, fighting back the tears that threatened to overwhelm her. “I’ll come back as soon as I can.” she promised, pressing a kiss to each of their foreheads. “I love you all so much.” With that, she forced herself to turn away, even though every instinct screamed at her to stay with them, to hold them until the fear subsided. But she couldn’t. She had to be with you, had to be there while the doctors fought for your life. She hurried after the medics, her heart pounding in her chest as she rushed through the doors of the medical wing, leaving her children behind, their tearful eyes searing into her memory.

[mostlymarvelsstuff]

Moi Devochki: Chapter 8

Warnings: smut (vaginal penetration, masturbation, small belly bulge), Omegaverse content (knotting)

Word count: 2217

WandaNat Masterlist Marvel Masterlist Moi Devochki Masterlist

 The smile your Alpha wears never fades as she grabs the pills from the hallway and a glass of water from the bathroom before she returns to both of you. She eagerly hands you each a pill before passing the glass of water to each of you. Once you've both taken the contraceptive and drank enough water she is quick to rejoin the nest.

   “My omegas took such good care of me.” she praises as she crawls over to the two of you. “Your Alpha is going to take care of you now, ok?”

   You both eagerly nod and allow her to undress you both before undressing herself. She takes her time taking in the sight of her naked mates as she lets your scents wash over her. She only stops when she hears a whine come from you.

   “Tasha, please” you plead while making grabby hands in her direction 

   “I’m right here Y/n, I’ve got you” she coos, leaning over you to capture your lips in a kiss as she lays you back into the nest. Her hands gently roam your body, “Are you sure you want this Omega? We can wait if-”

    “No, please” you whine, clutching onto her strong arms, “I want you Alpha, please”

   Her already hard cock twitches at the desperation in your voice, and though she's eager to please you she also doesn’t want to step over any boundaries or hurt you after what Steves put you through.

   “If you get uncomfortable, you tell me and we’ll stop. Ok, Omega?”

   You quickly nod, “Yes Alpha, I promise I’ll tell you”

   “Good girl” she praises, cupping your face and running her thumb across your bottom lip. You waste no time in taking her digit into your and softly begin to suck on it, “Fuck, such a good girl”

   Wanda lets out a whine beside the two of you, her thighs clench together in an effort to help ease the ache in her core but it doesn’t do much considering all that can help her feel better currently is her Alphas cock.

   “You're a good girl too Wanda” Natasha assures her, caressing her cheek with her free hand, “I’m going to fuck our Omega first, and while I do that I want you to sit right there and show off your pretty pussy to me, ok dorogoy(sweetheart)?”

   “Yes Alpha” she whimpers, parting her legs to reveal her slick covered thighs and puffy pink cunt. She can feel her cheeks heat up as her most intimate parts are now on display and her Alpha is absolutely loving it

   Natashas tongue pokes out to lick her lips at the sight before her, “Look at Wanda medovyy(honey), doesn’t she look pretty?”

  Your mouth goes dry upon seeing her sitting there waiting to be used while her essence drips down onto your nest and the way she chews on her bottom lip has the ache in your core growing

   “So pretty” You whisper, causing her cheeks to turn even redder as she twitches with need

   Your Alpha smirks at her, “Go ahead baby, play with yourself as you watch us”

   Her hand quickly settles between her legs and she lets out a whimper when her fingers make contact with her swollen bud. Wanting to please her Alpha she begins to rub in slow circles and can’t stop herself from moaning

   “Good girl Wanda, keep going” Nat instructs before her attention moves back to you, “You ready for me Y/n?”

   “Yes, yes please” you beg, squirming slightly beneath her, “I need you Tasha”

    Her hand moves to the base of her cock and she steadily lines herself up to your soaked entrance. She slowly pushes her hips forward, letting the head of her cock enter you

   “Oh, fuck!” you moan as you finally feel her tip spread you open around her length, and your fingertips dig into her forearms as she slowly pushes herself deeper into you

  “God, you're still so tight for me” she grunts out, already feeling like she might explode due to how you're squeezing her

   You mewl beneath her and the scent of both of your arousals has Wanda feeling lightheaded, but she continues to do as her Alpha said. Meanwhile your Alpha lets her head rest in the juncture of your neck so she can breathe you in as she bottoms out in you

   Your hands desperately claw at her back, the full feeling you now have is incredible but its nowhere near enough, “Fuck me Alpha, please”

   She hums and moves her hips backwards, slowly sliding out of you. Without warning she slams forward again, causing you both to shout out in pleasure. She continues this movement, but quicker now, easily falling into a rhythm that's leaving you breathless

   “Feels good, so good” you slur out as her cock hit the perfect spot inside of you

   “Fuck yeah it does” Nat agrees, moving away from your neck in order to kiss you, its messy due to your current inability to think but she doesn’t mind, “Gonna feel even better when I knot you and fill you up”

   You moan into her mouth as she connects her lips to yours again and Wanda clenches around nothing beside you both, desperate to be fucked and filled by your Alpha as well

   “You're so pretty taking my cock like this, too dumb to think straight because it just feels so good, isn’t that right medovyy(honey)?”

   “Yes! Yes!” you shout as she thrusts into you harder, “You feel so good Alpha!”

   “Gonna fill you up Omega, and you're going to take every last drop”

   They way her raspy voice whispers that in your ear has your walls pulsing around her, and her knot quickly grows. She slips it inside you with ease, and moans as she releases her seed inside you and the feeling of her warmth spilling inside you has you reaching your release as well

   “Tasha!!”

   The Alpha croons to you as you calm down and gently runs a hand through your hair as her attention shifts to the other Omega, “You close dorogoy(sweetheart)?”

   Wanda nods, “Yes! I’m so close, Alpha.”

   Natasha moves her free hand over to the Omegas cunt and easily slips two fingers inside her. Wanda cries out in pleasure at finally having something fill her, and she eagerly chases her release by rutting into her Alphas hand as Nat pumps her fingers in and out of her. 

   “Please Tasha, I wanna cum”

   Natasha curls her fingers just right, and moans as Wandas walls squeeze her digits, “Go on, Omega. Make a mess on my fingers”

   Wanda quickly falls over the edge and her slick drips down the Alphas hand as she cums. Natasha gently removes her fingers and lifts them to your Omegas mouth, who obliges in sucking them into her mouth to clean her own juices from them

   “Moi devochki(my girls) are such good Omegas” she praises, causing you both to purr, “I love you both so much”

   “Love you too Alpha” Wanda says as she crawls over to lay beside you both, “And I love you, Omega”

   You smile dopily, still heavily blissed out from taking your Alphas knot, “Love you both too”

   Nat chuckles and leans down to give you a quick kiss before she goes to do the same to Wanda, who now has to patiently wait for the Alphas knot to go down to have her turn. But thankfully she seems to be sated for now, and content to just cuddle into your side while Nat admires you from above. Eventually her knot goes down and she slowly slips out of you, causing you to whine 

   “Shh, it's ok medovyy(honey). I’m going to take care of Wanda now, you just rest”

   You groggily nod, “Mmkay Alpha”

   Wandas eyes widen in excitement as the Alpha crawls to hover over her body, and she eagerly grips onto the Alphas waist. The way the Alphas muscles tense under her touch has even more arousal shooting to her core, and Natasha knows it. She smirks at the brunette beneath her, carefully planting her hands on each side of the Omages head so that she's caged in by the Alphas biceps with a perfect view of her chest

   “Like the view, Omega?”

   “Yes” Wanda meekly replies as her eyes trail over the Russians muscles and breasts, “I like it very much”

   “I like mine too” she admits before leaning down to kiss her

   Wanda eagerly opens her mouth, letting the Alphas tongue slip inside to explore. She sucks on the muscle, pulling a moan from the Alpha that has her hips grinding up into her re-hardening member. She's not surprised by the amount of the Omegas slick she can feel against her

   “Did watching me mate with our Omega make you desperate, dorogoy(sweetheart)?”

   “Yes” Wanda whimpers as her grip tightens on Nats hips, “Please Alpha, I need you”

    “I know baby” she croons, getting herself lined up, “I’m right here, and I’m going to make everything better”

   Natashas hips thrust forward gently, allowing her cock to slip inside her needy Omega. Wanda moans at the sensation of finally being filled by her mate, and digs her fingertips deeper into Natashas muscular flesh in a wordless plea for the Alpha to be deeper inside her. Without a second thought Natasha leans back and wraps her arms around the Omegas thighs and pushes them up towards her chest, giving her the perfect angle for both of them

   “Oh god! Tasha!” Wanda cries out as the Alpha slams her hips forward

   Natasha grunts as she keeps up a steady rhythm, watching in awe as her Omegas face is taken over by an expression of pleasure, “You’re so pretty, dorogoy(sweetheart)”

   Wandas cheeks turn that familiar shade of pink again, and her walls contract around her Alpha in such a way that almost causes the Redhead to go dizzy. 

   “Fuck baby, you keep squeezing me like that and I’ll be knotting you in no time”

   The Omega moans at her Alphas admission, “Please do Alpha, want you to fill me up so badly”

   Wandas pleading eyes has her knot expanding in an instant, and with one hard final thrust she slips inside and locks into place. Their moans mix together as they both cum, and the Alpha nearly loses all composure as she sees a faint belly bulge appear on her mate.

   “Such a good girl” she praises, as she gently brings Wanda's legs back into a resting position. She brings her hand to rest on the small swell, “The two of you are going to look so beautiful someday when I get to fill you with my pups”

  Wanda wipers at the thought, and though you're still in your post bliss state, so do you. Your Alpha smiles and moves her hand from Wanda's stomach to hold yours and Wanda smiles at the adorable sight

   “I love you both so much” she whispers, as if it was a secret only the three of you shared before she brings one of her hands to join the two of yours

   “We love you too” you and Natasha end up saying in unison, causing the brunettes smile to widen

   After a few more minutes of comfortable silence the Alphas knot subsides and she carefully slips out of Wanda. She gives you both a gentle kiss on your foreheads before getting out of the nest

   “I’m going to go get cleaned up, then I’ll be out to take care of the two of you”

   As soon as she's out of view Wanda's body pressed up against yours. She wraps her arms around your waist and rests her head against your shoulder, causing you to purr at her affections. Your turn slightly, allowing your arms to slip around her as well and you press a gentle kiss against her forehead and she begins to purr as well

   Soon enough Natasha returns in a new pair of boxers and two washcloths. She gently washes each of your faces first, making sure any of her cum from her earlier blowjob is cleaned up. Then she moves on to your more sensitive areas. She tries her best to be gentle while still washing away any stickiness. Thankfully the warmth of the cloth feels good enough that neither of you mind when she does get a bit of a firmer touch. She finishes up and tosses the clothes into the dirty laundry and climbed back into the nest

   You and Wanda break apart once more so your Alpha can comfortably settle down between you both again. She wraps an arm around each of you and pulls you both as close as possible. She scents you both, making extra sure that her scent can be picked up on her mates, even if her seed is still dripping from you both she won’t take any chances. And she’ll continue to do so after each time she mates with you both. But for now she croons, content to have you both smelling of her while holding you both.

   “Get some rest if you need it, my Omegas.” she whispers, sensing how little energy the two of you have again, “I’ll be here, I’ll keep you safe”

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[dirtyvulture]

Beefy!Natasha Romanoff* x Fem!Reader

*Nat has a penis

18+ read at your own risk

Requested by anon: hi can u do g!p beefy nat please and like innocent sub fem reader absolutely dripping for her in public and trying to cup her bulge and muscles and so nat takes her home while ignoring her in the car and rams her senselessly in their bed 

AN: This one is for the bottoms. Enjoy!

"Y/N, can you hand me that rag from the bucket. Y/N? Hello?” 

You are completely oblivious to Steve asking you for something because you are so fixated on watching your girlfriend. The way she fills out her tank top, with her muscles stretching the fabric perfectly. The flex in her arms and shoulders when she reaches across the hood of a car, wiping a chamois back and forth until the metal gleams. 

The Avengers were hosting a car wash and naturally, cars filled the entire block. You had come along because you really had nothing better to do, and you were not going to pass up an opportunity to see Natasha, half-clothed and working hard manual labor under the sun. 

“Y/N!”

“Sorry, sorry!” you squeak, scrambling to fish a rag from a soapy bucket and passing it over to Steve. Natasha smirks as she watches you, knowing full well the effect she has on you. She pats the hood of the car, signaling she’s done, and the driver pulls forward to Thor’s station. Natasha walks over to the tent you’re taking cover from the sun under.

“You okay, babe? Make sure you’re staying hydrated,” Natasha says. 

“I am,” you insist.

“Good.” Natasha grabs her own water bottle, taking a long sip from it, and pouring the rest over her head. The water turns her white tank top see-through and when you see the fabric clinging to her perfectly sculpted abs, you almost fall over. 

“Just give me a few more minutes and we can head home,” Natasha says, coming over to you for a kiss. You don’t even realize what your hands are doing until you feel Natasha’s fingers close around your wrist, effectively stopping you from grabbing her bulge right in front of everyone. “Not here, baby,” she warns, but gives you a wink. “Maybe at home.”

You’re pretty sure you’re going to explode from the sheer level of arousal.

You sit down, crossing your legs, and trying to think of anything and everything that will take your mind off the empty pulsing of your core. You try to stop watching Natasha as she polishes off another car, but you can’t help but drool at her back muscles and stare at her ass. 

When Natasha finishes the last car, she comes back to you. “Tony’s taking over for me. Ready to go home?” 

“Yes, yes!” You leap up with embarrassing enthusiasm. 

The drive back to your house is barely ten minutes, but you’ve already shown you have no restraint when it comes to your girlfriend, especially after watching her work in the heat for almost two hours. Your hand starts out innocently on her thigh, but slowly creeps higher towards her crotch. Natasha gives no indication she wants you in her pants, so you continue to push your luck until she finally swats you just as you’ve made it to her zipper.

“I said at home,” she scolds you.

“I could blow you while you drive,” you beg. “I bet I can get you to finish before we’re even in the driveway.”

“Do you think that lowly of my stamina?” Natasha replies. 

“No, no!” you insist. “I just want you so badly, Nat. In my hand, in my mouth, in my--”

“That’s enough,” she snaps, and you know you’re walking a fine line, but you’re willing to push the boundary as far as you can go. But Natasha won’t have it, and she holds your wrists in your own lap to prevent you from touching her again.

When you finally arrive at the house, Natasha comes over to lift you out of the car and carry you inside. You’re squirming in her arms, impatient and desperate, but Natasha doesn’t say anything until you two are safely within the confines of your bedroom.

“On your knees,” Natasha demands, setting you on the floor. 

You scramble to obey, watching hungrily as Natasha strips off her tank top and kicks off her jeans. You see how big the bulge in her boxers has become and you know she’s just as excited for this as you are. 

“Put that pretty mouth to work,” she says, starting to stroke herself but you swat her hands away, taking her entire length in one swallow. Natasha moans as you pull back to suck on her tip and she threads her fingers in your hair to hold you in place as she starts jerking her hips forward. Your eyes water when the tip prods at the back of your throat, but you love being used like this. 

You grasp at her muscular thighs, trying to keep yourself balanced as she fucks your mouth, wishing that she would stay still for a moment so you can savor her taste and the way her cock stretches past your lips. 

“Fuck, baby, that’s my good girl,” Natasha grunts, her fingers tightening against your scalp as her hips move faster. “Where do you want my load? Down your throat or up your pussy?”

The dirty talk causes your own panties to soak with wetness. You can’t speak around her cock, and you won’t dare pull her out to respond. 

“How about both?” Natasha offers, her abs flexing as she empties herself into your mouth in record time. You smirk, knowing that she could never last long in your mouth. When she pulls out, you take in a big breath and try to dive back in for another taste, but she stops you.

“On the bed, baby,” Natasha says, sweat gleaming on her muscles as she tears off your clothes and man-handles you onto the mattress. She slaps your butt and rubs her cock through your thighs until it’s throbbing and hard again. “Oh God, you’re so wet. What was it? Seeing me at the car wash or sucking on my dick?”

The real answer is both, but you manage to squeak out, “The car wash!” before Natasha slides effortlessly into your heat. The emptiness in your core is replaced by a feeling of being stretched almost to your limits; Natasha is big and no matter how many takes you take her, it’s like the first time. You moan as she starts thrusting into you, holding tightly onto your hips to keep you from bouncing away.

“Fuck, you feel so good,” Natasha pants, pistoning into you harder and faster.

“Right there, Nat, right there,” you say when you feel her tip brush a sensitive spot inside of you. “Fuck!”

“You’re not gonna cum until I say you can,” Natasha demands, but the quiver in her own voice gives away the fact that she’s close too. You grab onto the bedsheets in clawed hands, biting into a pillow to will yourself from falling over the edge before you’re given permission to.

“Please Nat,” you beg. “I can’t hold it much longer.”

“Yes, you can,” she says, her hips moving jerkily now. Your walls clamp down on her cock sporadically until she can’t take it.

“Cum with me, baby.”

You don’t need to be told twice, your entire body going rigid as the ball of arousal in your stomach explodes. Your cum gushes all over Natasha’s cock and down your thighs, and her own seed shoots deep into you. Both of you ride out the bliss of your orgasms and Natasha lays on top of you, careful not to crush you with her weight but you want to feel every part of her against your skin.  

“I love you,” you whisper, cuddling into her and closing your eyes in content.

“I love you, too,” she says. 

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

AN: Please like, reblog, and comment! Follow for more content. 🥰

[buckyalpine]

Hello, first I would like to say that I love your writing and it normally makes me really happy while I am at some boring classes at college, so thanks for that hahaha ❤️

Also, I saw your requests are open and since I am absolutely obsessed with your angst for bucky, I am here to request some.

My idea would be something like this: reader has been in the compound with the avengers for a while now and besides really caring for the team, she has some problems being more open with friendships and relationships in general, cause of some insecurities with her personality, but in somehow she feels really comfortable with Bucky and they are kinda of great friends?

And then she's just waking by the compound looking for him one day and she hears him speaking something bad about her? Something about how he feels like she's overwhelming him cause she just has him as a friend and no one else and it kinda makes her look for him a lot for comfort ( I actually have no idea what he could be speaking, so this is just an idea but it could be anything, really) maybe this could actually be a misunderstanding and he did not meant in that way? I would love if it had a lot of angst and a happy ending, but of course is up to you!

YES I live for miscommunication and comfort and this type of angst, this concept is everything!!

warnings: Angst, miscommunication, idiots in love/ friends to lovers, plenty of fluffff

-

"Hey sugar plum" You smiled, plopping beside Bucky on the couch while he scrolled through Netflix documentaries with a large bowl of m&ms in his lap. "Whatcha watching"

"Haven't decided yet, pick something Jellybean" He handed you the remote and candy bowl, throwing his arm around the back of the couch while you got settled in and flicked through the selection of tv shows.

"Of course" Bucky snorted, shaking his head with amusement as Unsolved Mysteries started to play. You grinned, comfortable nestled against his side while the rest of the team joined one by one; Sam swiped a handful of chocolate from the bowl only to have Bucky swat at his hand like a cat.

"Get your own candy pigeon pants"

"What, y/n gets some but I don't" Sam scoffed in fake offence while Bucky shrugged, throwing one at him.

"Well you're not y/n" Bucky shrugged while you felt your heart flutter. You loved everyone with your whole heart, you really did, but no one else made you feel safe the way Bucky did. Being around him felt like being constantly wrapped in a thick fluffy blanket. Ever since you had joined the team, you struggled to fully be yourself around everyone.

Not that anyone treated you differently; but being surrounded some of the strongest and most brilliant people on the planet gnawed at your insecurities. Steve was a sweetheart, Nat was incredibly skilled and drop dead gorgeous, Tony could charm his way out of just about anything. Everyone had something that made them exceptional and then there was you. You tended to be on the quieter side, fueled with self doubt over if you actually brought anything to the team.

Were you really all that interesting?

What did you really add to the group?

Did anyone even notice your presence when you were around?

Even if they did, did it make a difference?

You'd overthink your way into a quiet corner wondering why you were the way that you were. No one else could see the way you'd worry yourself into a ball of self-doubt, figuring you were just shy and they didn't want to mistakenly push any boundaries.

Then there was Bucky.

Being around Bucky was different.

Something about him was warm and welcoming. He didn't hesitate to pull you out of your hiding spaces around the compound, making sure you joined for team events and game nights. Any insecurities you had always melted away when you were around him because he made you feel special.

Made you feel wanted.

The night went by with everyone sharing their own conspiracy theories over what they think actually happened at the end of each episode while you stayed tucked by Bucky's side. Neither of you had any plans on calling it an early night, while the rest of the team eventually all went to bed as you switched to a new show.

"I'm going to grab more snacks, want anything sugar plum?" You were about to make your way to the kitchen when Bucky placed his hand on your thigh, making you stay seated.

"I'll get it, tell me what you want Jellybean" He shook his head, grabbing the throw blanket and tossing it over your legs so you'd be comfy for the rest of the night while he went to grab the snacks. You didn't have to actually say anything, Bucky knew exactly what you wanted. He came back with half the kitchen raided on a tray along with a beer, pulling you to his side, letting you snuggle against his chest.

You let out a content sigh, unwrapping a chocolate bar while Bucky snuck a bite, the warmth of his body making it difficult for you to stay awake like you'd planned. You eventually fell asleep, waking up to find yourself tucked comfortably in your bed as the sun poured into your room, your body still wrapped in the throw he had covered you with.

You felt your body warm up at the way he was so gentle with you, having carried you to your room without making you stir the slightest. There wasn't anyone else you'd feel so comfortable around.

He was your safe space.

You found yourself hopping out of bed with more energy than usual, deciding to train in the morning instead of your late night workouts, if you were lucky, maybe you'd run into Bucky after his morning run. You made your way to the kitchen, smiling when you heard his voice, along with Sam's, the both of them bickering over something irrelevant as per usual. The closer you got, the more serious their conversation sounded making you wonder if something had come up with a mission

And then you heard your name.

You stopped half way, staying as still as possible part of you wanting to run back to your room while covering your ears, the other part of you curious to know what they were saying. You wanted to move but your feet were glued to the ground, your heart hammering out of your chest.

"How about y/n?"

"Uh y/n..." You could hear the hesitation in his Bucky's as he contemplated his next words, his tone irritated. "She's whatever. It's not like that"

"Meaning?"

"Uh. I don't know, she sort of follows me around everywhere, there's not a day I don't see her but its not like I ask to see her"

You blinked, your stomach starting to churn. Did you follow him everywhere? You did see him everyday but you didn't realize you were following him.

"I mean she's only that way with you, she's definitely not that comfortable with Steve or me" You could hear Sam trying to reason with Bucky but all he did was scoff, your heart wrenching further.

"Yeah. It's overwhelming"

You wanted to run, wishing you had stayed in bed for an extra 5 minutes, your body now hot, not from how safe he made you feel but from embarrassment. Of course he was overwhelmed with your clinginess, he didn't want to have to deal with a burden like you. He had so much of his own issues to deal with and then there was you.

Guilt started to cloud your mind as you thought about all the times you spent time with Bucky, staying by his side while he reassured you or comforted you. How many of those times were actually annoying for him, how many times did he wish you would suck it up and leave him alone instead.

"She's not really friends with anyone else on the team, I'm not sure why she hangs out with me specifically that much" He sounded even more irritated than before; the rest of the conversation a melted into dull buzz, your heartbeat thudding in your skull.

Your eyes stung, hot tears flooding your lash line at his words. Your bottom lip, trembled despite how hard you were biting down on it; your forced your feet to move, slowly backing away from the kitchen until you were far enough to run to your room. You slammed the door shut, instructing FRIDAY to soundproof the walls and turn away anyone that came by before breaking down into sobs.

All of your insecurities were dialed to 100 along with more being added to the list.

How did you not see how annoying you were being. You felt awful, embarrassed, confused.

Why didn't he say anything?

Of course he wouldn't, he probably felt pity for you. A grown adult woman who struggled to open up and still struggled with her personality. An absolute joke.

You let the day go by, too ashamed to face anyone, let alone Bucky. If he felt irritated, there was no doubt the rest of the team knew exactly how annoying he found you. You couldn't bring yourself to see any of them, deciding to skip both lunch and dinner instead while burying under the covers.

****

Bucky frowned when he didn't see you the whole day, his worries growing more when he didn't see you come by for dinner either.

"Where's y/n?"

"I checked on her during lunch but FRIDAY said she'd requested to be alone" Nat looked at Bucky, confused over how he, of all people, didn't know where you were.

"Aren't you both joined at the hip, how do you not know Barnes" Tony wiggled his eyebrow while Bucky rolled his eyes, too worried about you to retort to Tony's comment.

"I saw her once this morning in the training room but not after that. She seemed fine then" Steve had seen you that morning, happy to see you brighter when he had spoken to you, not missing your shy smile when he'd mentioned Bucky's name. "No one else saw her all day?"

Bucky was immediately out of his seat, making his way over to your room to see you, only to have FRIDAY respond instead.

"Ms. Y/l/n has asked that no one disturb her until further notice"

"For fucks sake" He mumbled, knocking at your door one more time.

"I'm sorry Sergeant Barnes, Ms. y/l/n has asked to be left alone"

Bucky was taken aback when he was tuned away; in the few times you had locked your door from everyone else he'd always been exempt from that list. Why didn't you want to see him either? He reluctantly made his way back, his mind now racing over what could have possibly happened from the night before to now.

****

You had managed to avoid Bucky the next few days, purposefully staying away from the areas you knew he'd be around and staying in your room for most of the day. Whenever he tried to speak to you, you'd find a way to escape the conversation, his words reeling in your mind, reminding you he found you annoying. Overwhelming. Clingy.

You couldn't understand why he was going out of his way to try and talk to you when you were trying so hard to stay away, your heart in pain not being able to spend time with the person you felt the safest with. Your mind made it impossible to get a wink of sleep; you made your way down to the kitchen for a late night snack instead. You grabbed a bowl of popcorn, turning the TV on to your favorite comfort shows needing a temporary distraction.

"Jellybean?"

Bucky made his way through the living room after a late night workout, his heart jumping when his eyes landed on you. He was by your side in an instant, not noticing the way you froze when he sat beside you.

"Hi James"

Bucky blinked, his name sounding foreign on your tongue.

He didn't like it.

Not one bit.

Since when was he James.

"Uh, is everything okay?"

"Everything's fine" You forced a smile, scooting over so you weren't sitting too close to him, your mind racing trying to find a way out of the conversation. Bucky could sense your discomfort but he had no idea why, his heart beating harder against his chest when he noticed your eyes shift, as if you were looking for a way to escape.

"Are-are you sure?"

"Yup!"

"Doll" He noticed the way your eyes continued to flick around the room, refusing to meet his. "Somethings bothering you"

"What makes you say that"

"I-you called me by my name-you never do that"

"What else should I call you" You avoided his gaze, fidgeting with a lose string on a cushion while Bucky felt his stomach drop.

Were you upset with him?

"You always call me sugar plum. Only you do" He shrugged sadly, his bottom lip jutting out into a pout. "You don't call me James"

"Oh" Was all you could muster, feeling your throat close up, hot tears threatening to spill from your lash line. You tried to turn away from him only to have him gently cup your cheek, tilting your chin to face him. His heart broke seeing your glassy eyes while you chewed your lip to keep from crying.

"Please tell me what's wrong, did I do something? Did I say anything?"

"No" You whispered, swallowing thickly, pulling away from him only to have him take your hands in his to keep you from running away.

"C'mon y/n, please?"

"I-I don't mean to follow you around and be so clingy. I'm just trying to give you some space Bucky" You tried to keep your voice steady, hanging your head so he wouldn't see the tears run down your cheeks. Bucky let go of your hands to cup your cheeks again, his thumbs wiping away your tears.

"Jellybean, what are you-

"I heard you talking to Sam" You spat, now annoyed that he was here trying to talk to you when he was the one who felt you followed him around. "I heard you tell him I'm always around you. That you don't even ask to see me but I'm there. I didn't mean to be so overbearing. I felt safe with you so I was closest to you, I didn't realize you felt like I was following you".

"Sweetheart, it's not overwhelming for the reasons you think"

"Then what else could it be Bucky? You could have told me you needed some space, I would've understood. I wouldn't have spend so much time hanging out with you-

"No! I like when you're around me Jellybean" Bucky almost sounded offended you'd suggest such a thing while you shook your head, sniffling.

"You don't have to lie to me-

"Y/n, no. I promise doll, this is just a misunderstanding, that's not that I meant when I was talking to Sam"

"Then what did you mean?" You whispered, confused over what else he could have possibly meant. Bucky felt butterflies in his chest, not fully thinking this through. Should he tell you what the conversation was about? Could it be worse than you thinking he didn't even like you when the truth was the complete opposite?

"I don't want to ruin our friendship if I tell you" Bucky suddenly looked scared, his eyes wide like a lost puppy, vulnerable and afraid. He sucked in a breath before speaking, inching a little closer to you. "Sam was asking about if I'm seeing anyone. He thinks I need to put myself out there"

Oh.

A sudden pang of jealousy hit your chest, the flinch in your face not missed by Bucky.

"He was suggesting..." He bit his lip, chewing it nervously before continuing. "He asked if there was anything between us. He thought maybe you liked me because we're always together" Bucky continued to look at you like a kicked puppy, his own emotions now all over the place. "I didn't think you did. At least not in that way but he kept saying there was something between us"

"It didn't sound like you liked me very much" You shrugged while Bucky frantically shook his head, mentally scolding himself. "I thought you found me too clingy"

"Never. You're never too clingy. M'so so sorry doll, I didn't mean for it to come out that way, you're the only person who I can spend the whole day with, I'm not comfortable around others like I am with you. I love when you come around looking for me. I guess a part of me was upset because Sam wasn't the first to ask me why we weren't together and ask if we were more than friends. I didn't think you'd like me and it's overwhelming for me because I feel so much and...well"

"and?" Bucky blushed, struggling to get the next words out while you anxiously waited for him to continue.

"and I really like you" He whispered, squeezing your hand in his while you shifted closer, letting him pull you onto his lap. His arms circled around your waist, holding you close to him both your hearts racing, his nose bumping against yours.

"You like me?" You felt your cheeks heat up when he nodded, his blue eyes shyly peeking up at you through his lashes.

"I like you jellybean. A lot"

"Even more than m&m's?" You felt him hug you together, your lips brushing against his.

"More than m&m's" He closed the gap between you both, pressing his lips to yours, kissing you sweetly as you gently carded your fingers through his hair. He kissed you until you both needed air, a dopey smile on his face while you snuggled into his chest.

"Does that mean I'm your sugar plum again?" He whispered hopefully making you giggle, kissing him deeply again.

"Always, my sugar plum"

"My jellybean"

****

"Fucking finally" Tony mumbled, his hair ruffled, stifling a yawn as he walked through the living room, grinning at you and Bucky sleeping on the couch.

"I told him" Steve rolled his eyes, snapping a picture of you both cuddled on the couch while Sam snorted, nodding in approval. "Took them long enough"

Tags: @glxwingrxse @hungryyeyess @sebsgirl71479 @beabutterfly987 @teambarnes72 @witchywhore @jamesbuckybarneswify @slutforsexyseabass @chrisdrysdale @littlemarvelmenfan @buggy14 @whimsyplaty92 @sergntbarnes @inkedaztec @pono-pura-vida @moonlightreader649 @brooklynscherry-z @elle14-blog1 @justsebstan @littlelightnings @psychomanniac-blog @happyt0exist @emmabarnes @bethyruth @matchat3a @cjand10 @getwellsoontana @cherryschaos @lokisasgardianvampirequeen @ashenc-blog @buckybarnessimpp @potatothots @goldylions @high-functioning-lokipath @morganemorganite-blog @kingfleury @peaches1958 @spiderman-stilinski @peaceinourtime82 @gublur @wintersmelodie @geeky-politics-46 @lolawassad @almosttoopizza @a-poor-gryffindork @alternativeprincess @buckycallsmeaslut @kamaria-sweet-writes @charmedbysarge @xnorthstar3x @kryoee7 @alina02 @gh0stgurl @polishprincess999 @jessybarnes @alltheficsiwant @chemtrails-club @eralen @perdidosbucky-yyo @clqrosmgc

[mapis-putellas]

The sick assassin

Pairings: Natasha x you

Words: 1346

Warnings: none

Summary: after returning from a three day mission, you expect to see your girlfriend happy to see you. But that wasn’t the case, and it only takes a simple sneeze to figure out why.

Notes: Thank you bestie for the idea. @goldenempyrean

If there was something you hated more than anything else in this world, it was debriefing. Above all else, debriefing with Tony Stark. It wasn't that you disliked the man. In fact, you were actually quite fond of him. But he talked. Oh man could he freaking talk. It was like his mouth moves before his brain gives him permission to do so.

No matter what cues you gave; how many times you'd try to politely interrupt him, he would pay you absolutely no mind. Often times, you'd tolerate it. He meant no harm after all. But due to the fact you were running on just two hours of sleep, your patience was wearing a little thin.

You were exhausted, and all you wanted to do was find your girlfriend so you could shower together before succumbing to dreamland.

With the knowledge that you'd be here for hours if you let him continue, you simply slide the completed mission report over to him before quietly slipping out of room. With the intention of going to find Natasha, your feet take you towards the common room where she'd typically wait for you after missions.

But much to your chagrin, she wasn't there. No one was. The room was completely empty.

"Great." You sigh heavily, deciding to head through to the kitchen to grab a drink before making any further attempts to figure out just where she'd disappeared off to.

Turns out, that wasn't necessary, because sat at the table was the woman herself. You feel whatever stress that had continue to linger leave at the sight of her. You knew she knew you were there, and because of that you expect her to beam at the sight of you before throwing herself into your arms.

But that doesn't happen. She barely even sends a glance your way. Weird.

"Nat? I'm home." You murmur like she didn't already know, setting down your bag before making your way over to her. You were tired, and you just wanted her to hold you.

Before you could even make it two steps however, she was already up and on her feet and setting her empty coffee cup into the sink. You go to smile and hold out your arms, under the assumption she'd walk into them, but she simply sends you a half hearted smile before grabbing her phone and leaving the room.

What on earth...?

Feeling a little hurt and very much confused, you follow her knowing she was heading back to your shared room. You push open the door and see her rifling through her dresser seemingly searching for something.

"Nat? What's going on? What are you doing?"

She glances back at you, "Getting clothes?" She retorts like you were dumb, and if you weren't so focused on why she was acting so weird, you'd hear the unfamiliar hoarseness in her voice. But you take absolutely no notice, feeling a little hurt that she was speaking to you in such a way.

"I see that. Let me grab some too so we can-"

"No y/n," she cuts you off, and you freeze midway to your own dresser. "I want to shower by myself."

You could only bring yourself to murmur a small, "Oh." in response, feeling your eyes burning with the familiar onslaught of tears. This never happens. No matter what, you always showered together after missions, no matter who's they were or how long they'd taken. It was a way to reconnect, to be close after being apart for so long. Tears would be wiped, bruises would be tenderly kissed and you'd spend over an hour simply holding one another.

It had become routine, something you both cherished and looked forward to so to be rejected so harshly made your chest physically ache. Knowing you needed to respect her boundaries, no matter how badly they hurt, you acquiesce her with only a nod and take a few steps away from her.

"Okay. That's okay. I'll-um-I'll wait." You ignore the single tear that had managed to escape as you sit down at your desk chair, completely missing the look of regret that appears briefly on Natasha's face before she reluctantly disappears into the bathroom, too busy trying to hold yourself together so you didn't fall apart in front of her.

You didn't want to cry. Not really. But you were tired, and overwhelmed, and all you had wanted was for Natasha to hold you just as she always does. You couldn't be mad at her for wanting space though, and you'd always respect her choices and boundaries.

You sniffle softly as you wipe off your cheeks with your sleeve, intending to get some more work done so there would be less to do tomorrow. Perhaps Natasha would be in a better mood then, and maybe she'd hold you. With a light sigh, you reach for your laptop.

"Huh'tsschoo!"

You startle slightly at the sound, head whipping up to face the bathroom door your girlfriend was currently behind. You wanted to call out and bless her, but something inside stops you in your tracks.

Give her some space, you remind yourself.

You bring your focus back to your laptop, interrupted again only moments later by yet more sneezes.

"H'htschoo! Huh'tsschoo! H'htschoo!"

Okay. That was concerning. Natasha never sneezes more than once. In fact, now that you think about it, you don't think you had ever heard her sneeze before. Was she...was she sick? Was that why she didn't want you near her?

Biting your bottom lip in consideration for just a moment, you close your laptop, rise to your feet and make quick work of kicking off your shoes before tentatively knocking on the bathroom door and inviting yourself in. You were immediately met with a heat that takes your breath away, and you frown in concern as you leave the door open intending to let some air inside.

"Nat?" You call in concern over the sound of the water hitting the tiled floor, reaching forward to pull the glass door of the shower open slightly. The sight that greets you all but breaks your heart. Natasha was flush in the face, eyes wet and bloodshot from what you could only assume were tears and that and even mentioning her dripping nose that she seemingly no longer cared about wiping.

She looked completely and utterly defeated.

"You're sick? Baby, why didn't you tell me?" You reach into the shower to turn down the temperature of the water before stripping off yourself and stepping inside. You hold out your hand, waiting for her to nod in consent before tenderly cupping her cheek.

Your other hand soon follows, and you can't help but pull her forward just slightly so you could press your lips against her forehead.

"I'm sorry." She chokes out, her own arms taking their rightful place around your waist, and you shake your head dismissively as you pull her properly into your arms, her bare frame flush against your own.

"It's okay. You don't have to be sorry." You cup the back of her head, combing your fingers through the wet strands.

"I do," she insists. "I was mean and ignored you and I'm sorry. I just didn't want you to see me like this. So gross and-"

You coax her head away from your chest and once again reach up to cup her cheeks, "Nuh uh. None of that. You're sick. You're allowed to be sick. It doesn't make you gross or whatever else you were going to say. And I forgive you. Yes it hurt-" you don't miss the way her eyes grow suddenly shiny at those last few words, and you pull her back to your chest and hold her as close as you possibly could.

"but I understand." You continue, "I'm not mad at you, or upset. I just want you to get better. Will you let he help you get better?"

Natasha sniffles, and nods, bringing a smile to your face for the first time in hours.

"Thank you pumpkin."

**

I’d love to hear your thoughts ♥️

[librarycards]

hello! i apologize in advance this is probably something that you get asked a lot. but do you have any recs on literary magazines to submit to? im a trans poet, ive been writing for over a decade but never shared anything and ive been wanting to try to send my stuff to get it published somewhere. obv ive been google searching but theres so many big and small publications and i was wondering if you have ones you like especially and/or tips on how to choose a magazine/journal to submit to. thanks a lot! <3

no worries, thank you for reaching out!! i've been publishing for like 8 years + an editor for almost 4, so i always appreciate the opportunity to help people new to the world find ethical publications that will treat their work with the care it deserves.

first and foremost: there are going to be pubs out there that are awesome and i don't know about. you may be the one to discover them for yourself! one aid in finding the best mag for your work is the wonderful, writer-created chillsubs. it's a fantastic platform that keeps a huge list of mags and presses and their relevant stats, and lets you create an account and bookmark those you're interested in. everyone i know uses them, and it's very worth it given the sheer volume of mags out there.

i also have some recs of my own, ofc. i'm going to list them below. if they pay (which i prioritize) I'll mark them with a $. some are trans/queer focused and some aren't, but all are pubs i've either edited and/or published with and can confirm their ethics + respect for writers.

manywor(l)ds - my mag! i'm co-founder and eic. break genre _ shapeshift with us. ($)

Sinister Wisdom - old, well-regarded lesbian+ lit mag, now open to everyone who is/loves a dyke. I'm guest-editing an issue on Madness with them, now open for submissions!

fifth wheel press - run by a beloved friend and comrade of mine. i've published here. excellent transparency, care, great for first-timers. ($).

kith books - headed by trans literary icon kat blair. a mag/press/community centered around bodymind non-conformity and noncompliance.

Honey Literary - QTPOC-centered, unabashedly pop-culture + social justice oriented. the vibes are simply immaculate.

Whale Road Review - not queer/trans focused, more oriented toward....'grown up' poetry/prose/pedagogy papers. Katie Manning (eic) is a fucking gem.

Graphic Violence Lit - just had my first experience publishing with them, and their care + consideration for the whole writer is amazing. they publish boundary-pushing work.

beestung - one of the brainchildren of Sarah Clark. nb/gq/2s SFF. I just edited a few guest issues w them and have published with them. amazing work. ($)

A Velvet Giant - genrequeer work. the editors are experienced, enthusiastic, and amazing at promoting writers long after publication. it's a family! ($)

Ethel Zine + Press - handmade with love by Sara Lefsyk (as you can see, trans/nonbinary/2s sarahs dominate indie publishing, as well we should :3). Sara is a sensitive and care-full editor and bookmaker whose every publication is a work of art.

Protean - pro- as in proletariat. awesome left mag with a mix of politics and culture and everything in between. they take reprints! ($)

Mudroom - publish your work along with a picture of your mudroom/shoe rack. very responsive editors who will hype you tf up. ($)

The Institutionalized Review - for psych survivors. the editors concreteness of vision and dedication to their community know no bounds.

Just Femme + Dandy - queer and fashion-focused! led by the inimitable Addie Tsai. They pay *handsomely*. ($)

In addition, there are also some "big" mags I have had excellent experiences publishing with and wanted to shout out. These are harder for a beginner to break into, but worth keeping on your radar + have been fantastic to me as a writer.

Electric Lit

Split Lip Magazine

The Offing

Nat. Brut

Santa Fe Writers' Project

Bodega

New Orleans Review

Augur Magazine

I hope this is helpful to you + others! the literary world is ever-changing and this is just a snapshot. Hopefully you find some that you like!

[spidermasc]

Can we talk about cnc with Dom lottie because 👉🏻👈🏻

lottie is the type of person to get off soooo much on your consent. even if you're not doing cnc, she could ask if she can touch you here or there, and when you verbally respond, because she'll wait until you do that, shaky puffs of breath spill from her lips, and her pupils blow up all wide and her panties get impossibly wetter. it excites her so much when you give her permission to do things to you!!!

talking about a specific scenario with her beforehand and asking what you're okay with and if she can say XYZ during it. always, always establishing a safe word, even if it's a simple 'red.'

always been obsessed with her using the wilderness as an excuse to fuck like yes ma'am!!! has a thing for using you in the rituals she does for the community. an even bigger thing for tying you up to a tree and using you however she pleases. when she starts hearing/feeling the wilderness again, she loves to chase you into the woods :) kinda like the card pulling but no matter what card you get, you don't get a say in anything. she's gonna take you regardless. she makes the hunt so scary as well and it genuinely feels like she's gonna rip you to shreds as she yells for you to give in, to give your body up for her.

pushing your boundaries @__@ she'll stop immediately if she even feels you become slightly uncomfortable or senses any sort of uncertainty, but she loves seeing how far she can go. stripping you naked in her office space and seeing how you hide yourself as she stares, knowing how many people walk through that building and hang out right outside the windows where you're by. forcing you to show off your body for her and when you pull your hands away from your center, you're soaked. so soaked that it's dripping down your thighs.

"i thought you didn't want this? your pussy says otherwise." or "you can fight it all you want but i know what's best for you." alwayssss words like this that get you so dizzy and horny @__@

rough rough rough!!! if you're too slow in doing something, she's pushing you around and molding you into the perfect little doll that actually listens. taking too long to strip for her and she ends up tearing your shirt off and using her knife to cut your clothes off :3

been thinking about this a lil but a scenario you've talked about with lottie for a while involves some of the girls... having them come up and make advancements towards u despite being with lottie and coaxing you into letting them touch you. group circles in the sharing shack where you're just being friendly with nat and sitting on his lap whlie lottie talks about whatever. thank god a blanket is draped over your lap otherwise your girlfriend would see the way nat forces her fingers inside your hole, gripping your thighs to keep them open and hissing in your ear for you to stop wiggling around so make and let this happen

[blackjack-15]

the way nat is treated is sooo sad and predictable. she doesn't always (present day) handle things well, but...with an upbringing like this? and good on her for pouring the liquor down the drain and bringing paper towels

"oh you're gonna make sprite?" "yeah, i'm gonna make sprite" that's carmy in a nutshell. push on a wall, it becomes a bridge.

"holding everything in and then letting it out inappropriately" you've reduced the bear to its most basic components!

he made sprite! something from nearly nothing, that's carmy. and no one even thanks him to his face. he didn't have to do it, he was doing 6 other things at once, and he still made sprite for someone who was having a hard time

also richie's ex wife reminds me strongly of mrs. berzatto. just saying.

"why isn't someone listening to me?" "i'm listening" "WHY IS NO ONE LISTENING TO ME" and this is mrs berzatto at a 4/5? we're gonna see her at a 6+ before long

i hate to armchair-diagnose, but there's pretty obviously a personality disorder present here in the Matriarch of the Berzatto clan. histrionic personality disorder is my immediate thought, but could be something else.

"no one's f//kin with you why would you think that?" gee i wonder.

"we ran into the love of your life" "i don't have a love of my life" 1) they're 100% talking about claire 2) carmy baby. you're so right you don't yet.

wow i hate mikey/richie right now. but! this adds a whole new dimension to carmy re: claire! because claire is tied to mikey, to what mikey 'wanted' for carmy, and that makes this whole thing come full circle, doesn't it?

"what did you do. what did you do." maybe christmas in copenhagen would have been a good idea.

carmy's absolute distaste for this whole 'conversation' (the glasses came off? the body is banging? really guys? you're being disgusting) is beautiful. carmy's got many, many vices and makes a lot of mistakes, but this is Not something he puts up with

"i don't understand why you would do this. why are you like this" oh carmy honey.

"i'm not in love with her, that's what i'm saying, where did you guys get that?"

THERE IT IS.

there's the reason for showing how carmy reacts when someone wants something from him, why the awful phone conversation with claire has her making him go from not wanting to give his number to saying "i want you to have my number". we have to see how carmy goes from saying no -- the truth -- to saying yes -- a lie -- after pressure is put on him. because this is where it starts.

claire represents what others want for carmy. normalcy, a chance -- his "only" chance -- to be with someone deemed societally Valuable. to not be an "other", to fit in, to have something "Good" that everyone thinks is good. carmy/claire is nauseating, but it's supposed to be. people spend so much time on screen telling us how Good claire is, when the show itself doesn't back it up. she's a figure of myth, a representation of the expectations others set on carmy and that he bows to, not a character. full stop.

and wow this is legitimately hard to watch. carmy attempts to set boundary, boundary is ignored. rinse, repeat.

they think carmy's in love with her -- this is a man in his, what, late 20s at this point? -- because he used to draw her in high school? the tenuous is getting more tenuous my Gosh.

"carm. this is a good thing." oh and no it really really isn't.

okay nice moment here for richie. does he think carmy is weird? yeah. does he still kinda brag about his sprite-making abilities? yeah

okay, ex wife is the worst. the boy makes you sprite b/c you don't feel good and there's none in the house and you ask why they'd 'punish' a nice girl like claire by hooking carmy up with her?

richie is adorable with his daughter and despite everything going wrong in his life (both his fault and not) is a really good dad ("do you think that she'll like us?" is such a soft question). i am really, really glad he's divorced. i want him to find happiness -- i don't know what that would look like for him just yet, but.

"we just have to not be like our parents" the other distillation of the bear!

richie trying to get a better job for his kid is really sweet. mikey telling the bill murray story in the background? hilarious

we're further breaking down the Mythos of Mikey -- he's introduced as a perfect, tragic figure, and we've spent a season and a half showing his foibles...which are Many.

[themculibrary]

Clint/Laura/Natasha Masterlist

all of himself that is good (ao3) - shellybelle T, 33k

Summary: "You're all grown up," Tony tells him. "You've got a wife, and kids. Why didn't you think about them before you chose the wrong side?"

Clint is a father first. But not all family is flesh and blood.

all this comes back to me, then goes again (ao3) - andibeth82 T, 38k

Summary: Here’s the thing about Laura Barton: Everyone assumes she met Clint first. After all, he had a farm, and he had kids, and he had a life that seemed like it came well before Natasha Romanoff and the Avengers.

Here’s the thing about Laura Barton: The real truth is that she fell in love with Natasha Romanoff first.

and as to me, i know nothing else but miracles (ao3) - andibeth82 T, 10k

Summary: Soulmark aside, she’d long accepted the fact she’d become attracted to Clint in a way that transcended him just being a comfort and a best friend, though other than casual cuddling and playful banter, they’d never done anything to push those boundaries. But while Natasha may have spent a lifetime breaking up relationships in every way, she knows that this is different, and that she loves Clint and Laura too much to try to get in the middle of that relationship.

Asphodel (ao3) - Sanctuaria T, 38k

Summary: Post-Endgame.

After sacrificing herself on Vormir, Natasha wakes up in a strange world of perpetual orange twilight.

Of course, she's not the only one stuck there.

for the half of ourselves we have lost (ao3) - andibeth82 M, 179k

Summary: Natasha says, "No matter what happens, this family will always be the one thing we have. We’ve all put each other through too much shit to let anything come between us.”

Clint says, “You know what it means to owe a debt, Nat.”

[a family picking up the pieces, before and after the war]

From Feral Beginnings to Found Family (ao3) - breatheforeverypart M, 75k

Summary: Welcome to the Barton Farm! The house is under construction. Clint is often away on S.H.I.E.L.D. missions. Laura's working part time, while caring for their one year old daughter, Lila. Add a half-feral ex-Red Room agent and an emergency foster placement to the mix and any ties to a normal family are severed.

What is their new normal? Could it be that the ensuing chaos will forge a found family that can withstand anything life throws their way?

Home’s not home without Auntie Nat (ao3) - PanicMoon15 G, 5k

Summary: Wanda's mind control had a bad effect on Natasha, but Clint's there to help. He brings her home to Laura and the kids with the rest of the Avengers, only to realise it may be his daughter who can be the one to make Auntie Nat feel better.

Auntie Nat needs cuddles. The Barton family is there to provide them.

i love only that which they defend (ao3) - andibeth82 M, 46k

Summary: She finds that she laughs more with Natasha, almost as much as she does with Clint, but for different reasons. Clint had his huge heart and his stupid jokes and easygoing demeanor that Laura had always been attracted to, his perpetually messed up hair and klutzy manner that caused him to drop a slice of pizza on the floor or spill coffee on the couch -- all of the things that had made her fall in love with him in the first place.

Natasha, for all that she was stoic and rigid and carved out of knives and battle scars, was warm in a way that Laura couldn’t quite describe, as if she was a perfect fit for the missing piece Laura had always been looking for in both a friend and a partner.

My Soulmate's Soulmate (ao3) - solrosan G, 3k

Summary: Clint married a woman with two names on her wrist – his, and one written with Russian letters.

nor need we power or splendor (ao3) - shellybelle M, 242k

Summary: She hadn’t been sure, at the time, what had finally driven her away from the training center, brought her to book a flight to Waterloo and rent a car for the drive out out to the farm. But when she had packed a bag and headed to the nearest airport, it hadn’t been her apartment in New York or her condo in DC or her London townhouse or any number of hidden bolt-holes she kept around the world that she’d flown to, but a creaking, busy farmhouse in Iowa. (Or: It's been a long journey to get to where they are, and it'll be an even longer journey home.)

Out of Darkness there is Light (ao3) - Rouko E, 66k

Summary: Loki, battered adopted son of Odin is captured by the Avengers and resigns himself to whatever punishment awaits him on return to the realm he once thought was his home. Enter an insomniac billionaire that sees something no one else does. Can his sharp wit and lethal tongue save the God of Mischief from a fate he doesn't deserve?

If he can save him, what then? Is he still an enemy or could he be turned to the side of good? Can a snarky God known for his silvertongue and lies really be trusted to become an ally to Earth? Tony Stark is going to find out.

ThIs fic takes place immediately after the Avengers Assemble movie and Iron Man 1 & 2. COMPLETE!

She's My Cherry Pie (ao3) - sheis-theslayer (Perididdle) E, 3k

Summary: If Laura Barton has said it once, she has said it a thousand times: no one touches the food while she's cooking. Especially if it's her pies.

But Natasha Romanoff never listens.

the growing season (ao3) - sweetwatersong G, 6k

Summary: Three summers Natasha spends at the farmhouse and two she spends at home.

the landslide will bring it down (ao3) - smallblueandloud T, 10k

Summary: Lila is crying, taking big gulps of air in between her words. She’s scared. In the background, there’s a baby crying, but Natasha barely registers it.

“Mama and Daddy just- they just- Mama Tasha, I can’t find them.” In her mind’s eye, Natasha can see her: a scared eleven year old girl, with her hair in braids, clutching the landline. “Cooper disappeared in front of me. It’s just me and Nathaniel, and I don’t know what to do. Mama-”

(or, natasha's spouses and eldest child dissolve into ash - and she is left to pick up the pieces)

til the clocks run down (ao3) - andibeth82 M, 257k

Summary: "I think I do love her."

The words don’t shock her -- not really, not when she lets herself think about it. She does believe that Clint hadn't been sure about how deep his feelings for Natasha went the first time he admitted his attraction to her. But Laura would have been a fool to believe there wasn’t something more developing, especially after being around them in the few times they’d visited together since Clint’s confession. It had been easy to tell how their partnership was becoming comfortable, a relationship as worn and cozy as the one Laura’s built for herself with the man she’s loved for almost eight years.

[the beginning, the middle, and the journey home]

[bengiyo]

I Told Sunset About You Rewatch Ep 5 (Finale) Stray Thoughts

As a disclaimer, I don't think ITSAY is the end of this story, but it is the end of this run. This is an I Promised You the Moon fan account.

I also rewatched The Love of Siam (2007) last night to return to the angst I felt going into the end of this.

Last time, Teh blew up every relationship in his life thinking he was doing something for Oh, but really just being a condescending ass to everyone in his life. There was much ugly crying. However, we got the best underwater kiss ever, so it's a wash?

Teh got back to test taking form, but Oh seems to be struggling even with Teh's tools.

This show makes deleting your chat lots so dramatic by underscoring it with the Untold Answer instrumental.

I like walking through the wreckage of Teh's relationships. The friend chat is awkward. His mom is still mad, but she's still make sure he eats. Hoon still believes in him, and wants him to keep the tuition money. His teachers think he's been irresponsible and want him to learn the lesson and do better. Tarn is still pissed and setting effective boundaries.

I continue to adore MoRaoYuLok.

Of course Teh has to be petty and mean to Oh while giving a blessing to Phillip. This is not how you get a man, Teh.

I really do get the "It should have been Bas" folks. He's so kind and earnest. He's not afraid of his feelings for Oh. He said, "I have no shame." Just look at Teh losing it because Bas can just say how he feels for Oh in front of everyone.

I love this teacher for interrupting Oh's answer. It was brave for Bas to confess publicly, but Oh doesn't need to give his answer publicly. Very tactful of the teacher. He gets a plate.

Drink the damn coconut, Teh. Let your family support you.

We don't talk about Nah enough and how well she worked with Billkin and Nat.

Look at them calling back to the first day they met here.

Teh, why are you hurting your own feelings asking questions you already know the answer to? This man is a masochist. He always chooses the thing that will fuck up his life the most.

Look at this man. He is ugly crying during an exam. I feel bad because this is what the closet does to you. Oh moved on, and now he's looking at a version of his life where all of his efforts went to complete waste. Like he's totally in the wrong, but so was I when I was his age. I also made big mistakes.

See, I love the pacing of this show. As much as I feel for Teh and his struggles, he infected Oh with internalized homophobia. Oh panics a bit at Bas holding his hand because of what trying to be with Teh has done to him. That's fucked, and so sad. Bas is just so sweet.

Brother balcony scene, my beloved. You gotta see the documentaries to hear Boss talk about Teh and Nat in this scene.

Still, excellent pacing to follow the mixed feelings of the last few scenes with Teh finally admitting aloud what's going on with him. Hoon is a great brother for asking his brother what needed to be asked in the right way.

I'm an oldest sibling, and one of the oldest cousins. I would have loved having a peer relative give me permission to be who I am. This scene gets me every time.

Love Hoon mentioning hand holding and we've had Bad holding Oh's hand in both scenes around the balcony.

Everyone else is worried about Teh and Bas is unbothered.

Piano scene, my beloved.

Oh immediately reacting to the song, and then the slow pan to push Bas out of frame so we know he's back on his Teh bullshit. Then the reveal that Teh is also here and in his feelings next to the Oh-aew dessert? Skyline remains undefeated.

Of course Oh-aew's family have a red iPad. It's his color and he's not wearing his color right now.

Tarn didn't fuck up her admissions. That's all that matters.

Oh-aew getting into his first pick makes me cry every time. Skyline? Undefeated.

Sui is so relieved that Teh is still getting into a school with his program, but Try feels like he failed because his plan is off.

Bas is the bravest out of all of them. He took Oh to Teh's house so Oh could break up with him. I've been Bas, too. It hurts to know you're not their choice. It's interesting that Teh is upset about only getting his second choice school and Bas is upset about being Oh's second choice.

"I don't want to see him sad." These two, I swear. Bas, I hope you found someone who cares about you first.

Of course we can't have a Bas and Oh scene without checking in with Tarn. I like how they changed her costuming slightly so she looks a little more grown up.

The Tarn Teh-Yongjian portrait is such a thoughtful gift. I feel bad for Tarn, because Teh is trying to let her down as gently as he can. He does his best to affirm that he really did like Tarn for two years, and one of his fears is of things changing and losing friends.

Smile plays Tarn's disappointment so beautifully during the scene. I really don't think we've praised her performance enough. I want to interview her and Tina Holmes (for her work in Edge of Seventeen and Shelter). She tries so hard to not make Teh feel bad even as her heart breaks. Not until Nara in La Pluie do I think we've let the ones who lost in love be sad with this much respect.

I'm glad I watched Love of Siam again, because that movie also cleared up all of its problems before building towards a gay crescendo.

This track playing during Oh's run is so beautiful.

Welcome back, Skyline instrumental. You are the standard.

It's really beautiful to see Teh encouraging Oh for something he believes in finally.

The story of them filming the cape scene and the clouds clearing is as good as the show itself. I cry just thinking about Boss telling us about it.

Oh, Oh-aew, you always have so much room to this boy. "Do not disappear like that again, please," is such a reasonable request.

"If I can be anything, can I be your boyfriend?" genuinely healed a massive hole in my heart left behind by the end of The Love of Siam. What a beautiful final shot. You have no idea the angst I carried even through the first five years I was in modern BL.

When I tell you we had no idea that I Promised You the Moon was coming, and this stinger made us lose our collective minds.

Final Verdict: 10, It Is Still the Standard. This is by far one of the most coherent shows we've ever had. Every single aspect of this show is executed to near-perfection. There is a reason many of us talk about BL as pre- and post-ITSAY. If you have been sitting on the fence about this show, I genuinely think it's hard to understand the seismic shift that followed this show without witnessing it for yourself.

Look for more commentary from us on @the-conversation-pod in the fall. We record our retrospective tomorrow!

[theloverscardtarot]

Evan and Nat June 28 Reading (Part Two-Tarot)

Ok here goes part two.

Tarot

Relationship Energy: 5 of Pents Side, 4 of Swords Side.

5P: This signifies feeling left out in the cold. You may be feeling more vulnerable than you wish to right now, or at the least insecure. It also means that not all is lost. Try to work with what you have. That can be enlisting the help of a friend or family member to talk it out. "If you don't ask, you don't get"(!!)

4S: This card indicates that things in your relationship may not be as peachy as they once were, but the upside is that all is not lost. Both partners may benefit from some time alone to reflect. Then maybe you can come together with an open, refreshed outlook. I feel like this could be a good thing after vacationing together lol.

Nat's POV: Queen of Swords Rev, Page of Wands Rev. 7 of Cups, Ace of Pents

QSR: In a love reading the queen of swords can represent a motherly figure. And she may be trying to interfere and cross boundaries. (Mom or sister?) However, reversed, I think this could mean they are staying out of the way. They may give advice if enlisted. The queen in general could signify someone that knows what she wants and comes off as abrasive. This is Nat's POV, so I wonder if she is getting negative feedback. Or if she feels boundaries are either pushed too far or are being allowed to be crossed in a detrimental way.

PWR: Again, this signifies feeling like you are doing more than your partner in the relationship. It takes two to tango and you can't fix things by yourself. You partner has to be willing to work with you to fix what might be making you unhappy. And if you can, it may save the relationship. However, this is reversed. So maybe, they are starting to work together, or the load has shifted somehow.

7C: Just because there is change presently in your relationship, does not mean anything is wrong. Stop trying to fix what is not broken. There might be an urge to hold on too tight. Let the reigns go and let things flow. Giiiirl, this is just a female reaction to things.

Ace of Pents: This card could actually signify new beginnings. Your path could be leading towards commitment or it could be saying a new relationship is heading your way. (Oh Lord, I was wondering where this just came from and then I did the rest of the reading)

Evan's POV: King of Pents, Temperance, 3 of Swords, 2of Swords Reversed

KP: A traditional person. The king of Pents needs to talk about his feelings more. Your partner is not a mind reader. Also don't try to be something you are not for the king. Based on past readings, if Nat is doing this, Evan can see right through it and I think he does not want that for her.

Temperance: There may be two different energies at play here. We have seen before that one person here is not as tradish as the other. We can see this in the previous card that Evan might be more traditional. Nat may not have the same outlook s Evan and that may be hindering commitment, but if they can meld together, they can make it work. But, both parties have to work together. I haven't said this in a bit, but Evan! Get your shit together, baby 😘

3S: This one is never good. This signifies heartache and loss. However, if past pain and current problems can be worked on by both partners, then it may not be doomed.

2SR:This card is about partnership and balance. But reversed it may mean that this is lacking thus far. It would benefit you to address past pain and figure out a balance that works for you and your partner.

Nat's energy: Devil, High Priestess Rev.

Devil: Codependency and desire. She may feel passionate towards Evan, but desire can not be the only good quality in a relationship.

HPR:This could indicate that something has been said or done in the relationship that has hit Natalie the wrong way and she may have assumed the worst without talking through her anxieties. It does not mean she is correct. And this can cause a period of tension.

Evan's Energy:

Page of Cups: Well shit. I don't know if I should say this. This card can indicate that good news will come from somebody younger than you. And could mean a baby is on the way. If it's not yours, it will be somebody in your family. @shamrock313 , I need a beer. I blame you for showing me "tarot time" Hey, maybe there is a cousin or someone that's about to have a baby in his/her family.....I'm almost done here and then imma peace out guys. Sorry, I did not look at these cards before typing them. I'm really not trying to start shit. Don't hate me. ❤️

Overall dynamic: Chariot Rev, Queen of Pents Rev.

Chariot R: "Take things way slow in a relationship" but it's reversed guys. It's reversed.

QPR: She represents Natalie to me. She comes out for me and I take it as her personality. She signifies a smooth and organized home and environment. But being reversed it could mean things are about to get a bit chaotic. 🤷

[dirtyvulture]

Aftermath

Natasha Romanoff x Beefy!Sergeant!Reader

18+ only read at your own risk

Summary: Natasha comes to apologize after she unknowingly hurt your feelings.

AN: Reader has a penis, no pronouns used.

Wrote something short(ish), inspired by several anons as a sequel to this ask.

“You want to come over to my place later?” Natasha whispers in your ear.

“No, not really.” You lean over the railing of the balcony, watching as your recruits tackle the muddy obstacle course in groups of five. “Fitz, Hunter, don’t leave your teammate behind like that!” you shout, noticing two bigger male recruits trying to continue on while their smaller female teammate struggles to scale the rock wall on her own. 

“Yes, Sergeant!” they yell back, meekly turning around and offering their hands to the female.

“Why not?” Natasha sounds shocked you would refuse an offer to be in bed with her. But you still haven’t forgotten her comments at the dinner party.

“I have to catch up on some stuff,” you lie.

Natasha frowns, but she doesn’t push the issue.

***********************************************************************

You’re eating a limp sandwich from the chow hall with some of your colleagues, completely tuned out of the conversation. Natasha walks by with her own tray, tempted to sit next to you, but remembering how distanced you felt from her. 

You notice her, but make no acknowledgement of her.

“Maximoff told me he wants to apply to be a sergeant,” Sam Wilson sitting next to you says. “He was asking what you studied to pass your test.”

“Well, if someone like me can pass, then he shouldn’t have to study at all,” you respond, just loud enough for Natasha to hear. 

Her face turns as red as her hair and she hurriedly turns and walks away.

***********************************************************************

You walk out of your bathroom with just a towel wrapped around your waist, water still dripping down your chest and back from your wet hair. You startle when you see Natasha sitting on your bed, completely forgetting that she had access to your room.

“Hi,” she says in a small voice.

“Why are you here?” you dismiss, walking past her to your closet.

“You’re mad at me,” she says.

“I’m not…mad…” you respond not very convincingly. You grab a clean shirt, turning back to face Natasha and notice that her eyes are trailing down your torso, over the muscles of your chest and stomach where your dog tags hang, and the V-line of your hips that narrow past the towel. “Um, Sergeant?” you ask.

“I’m not your sergeant right now,” Natasha says, and this is the first time you’ve heard her say that. She gets up and steps towards you, gently taking the shirt out of your hands. You stare at her, a little confused. Your relationship with her was complicated to say the least. There were no official boundaries or titles, yet you knew this woman was the only one you wanted to spend the rest of your life with. But the nature of your job, especially with the power dynamic, made it almost impossible for you two to make any sort of public announcement.

“I just want to be your Nat right now.”

“My Nat?” you repeat, as if you didn’t hear her correctly. She nods, undoing the towel from your waist and letting it fall to the floor. You feel yourself harden under her gaze alone, a little embarrassed how quickly she turns you on. She takes your hand and leads you to your bed, lying down and guiding you on top of her. “Are you sure you don’t want to–” you start, but Natasha quiets you with a kiss, unbuttoning her jeans and kicking them off. 

“I want you right here,” she says, brushing her hands down your sides before grabbing the hem of her shirt and removing it. 

“I lied. I was a little mad at you,” you confess in a jumble as Natasha holds onto your hips and pulls you down so your cock rubs against her stomach. 

“You had every right to be.”

You look down and see your pre-cum shining along her abs, your cock throbbing harder at the idea of slipping inside of her and pumping her full of your cum. 

“Can I…” you start to pant, your fantasies getting the best of you.

“Of course.” 

For once, Natasha is not particularly dominant with you, lying back and letting you do what you want. Your hands circle her smaller waist, pinning her down to the bed as you line up your cock with her dripping center and slowly push in, moaning at the warmth that surrounds you. 

“F-Fuck, Sergeant,” you say, and Natasha corrects you with a click of her tongue. “I…I mean, Nat. You feel so fucking good.”

Your hips seem to have a mind of their own as they pump forward and backward, filling Natasha to the hilt and pulling out until you can see your tip gleaming with your combined fluids. 

“Keep going, Y/N. Just like that,” Natasha guides, pushing her head back into the pillows as you thrust into her. She holds onto your biceps, tracing the line of a scar on your left one from a knife fight back on one of your first assignments.

You grunt as you start to pick up the pace, slamming into harder and her body shakes as your thighs meet hers. It’s almost like sliding through wet silk; there’s no resistance and only a delicious warmth that makes your head spin. 

“Don’t stop, don’t stop,” Natasha moans and you feel her walls tighten around your cock, causing you to increase your strength to fill her deeply. 

“Do you want me to pull out?” you gasp, slowing just enough to wait for an answer.

“Cum inside of me,” she says, locking her ankles around your lower back so you couldn’t pull out even if you wanted to. 

You thrust in one final time, feeling yourself lose control and pumping your cum into her hard and fast. You feel light-headed as you lay down softly on her, putting your head on her chest and letting her stroke your hair until you fall asleep.  

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

AN: Safe to say they’re made up? 🤔

Please like, reblog, and comment! Follow for more content. 🥰

[chris-continues]

Bittersweet.

Natasha Romanoff/reader angst

This was originally a self insert and @lucicomplexx + @astrathecowboy saw me type it in our shared disc chat LMAO

The wind breezes by Nat as she walks alongside me.

Normally, I’d be excited. Get my hopes up even.

I thought she’d want to hang out, blow off some steam on calm quiet walks before or after aggressive sparring.

But something felt different. Something. Like I’d done something wrong- like-

“You can tell something’s off.”

Her eyes held a poker face, not showing off her cards and keeping her emotionless gaze fixed on me.

It made me nervous, like it’s purpose.

“I didn’t want to observe you like that.”

I hummed, looking down. I kept tapping my leg, not even bothering to hide my nervousness.

“You like me.” She scoffed, smile showing through.

Maybe she was trying to be funny to break the tension.

“Mhm.” I almost apologize.

“I can’t. It would be unfair of me to string you along.”

She’s standing up and looking at the sky. I’m just having my elbows rest on my knees.

Even when she’s pushing me away, she’s so powerful.

“Yeah. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be- you know, I thought after a few years… it would go away.”

“Yeah, well, there’s only so many tolerable people here. So- heh.” She kicks my leg cheekily.

“Did you ever… think about it?” Shit- did I cross a boundary? My curiousness is a bitch sometimes.

“…yeah. I did.”

“…”

“…”

“I’m gonna sit- maybe grab a…” I shoot my head up, “hot dog.”

“Ok.”

You don’t like hot dogs that much. You’d rather get a pretzel.- Natasha knew that. She knew all too much about you- maybe you were a small immoral comfort she’d indulge in. But hopefully today and forward, she’d stop.

She probably walked back to the compound that day. Maybe did the sparring I thought we’d do- I really don’t know her that well, I realize.

Maybe I should’ve just… tried to hide it better. But I know it would still end up the same way, with a girl in her thirties rejecting me because I’m young and naive.

I hate that word. But at least I can try to pick up the sweet parts and move on,

Because a heartbreak with Natasha is always bittersweet.

[qnewsau]

Brisbane Pride Festival unveils 2024 Fair Day lineup

New Post has been published on https://qnews.com.au/brisbane-pride-fair-day-lineup-2024/

Brisbane Pride Festival unveils 2024 Fair Day lineup

Brisbane Pride Festival has officially announced the performers on the fabulous 2024 Fair Day lineup later this month.

September is Pride Month in Brisbane, with Brisbane Pride Festival’s month-long calendar of events underway across the city.

On Saturday, September 21, the Brisbane Pride Festival will once again host Fair Day, Queensland’s largest LGBTQIA+ event, at Musgrave Park in South Brisbane.

Fair Day runs from 10am to 5pm that day, after the Pride Rally and March through Brisbane which begins at Queens Garden Park at 9am.

Paul Wheeler will host on the Fair Day main stage alongside the recently-crowned Queens Ball Drag Performer of the Year Gayleen Tuckwood, introducing the day’s lineup of live performances, drag shows, and DJ sets.

Headlining Fair Day is Natalie Bassingthwaighte, the multi-talented singer, actress, and Rogue Traders frontwoman, bringing her powerhouse vocals and electrifying stage presence to Musgrave Park.

Nat Bass came out late last year, going public with her relationship with her partner Pip Loth.

Images: Instagram (front), Brisbane Pride Festival (back)

Live music, drag and DJs at Fair Day

Greg Gould, known for his heartfelt performances and powerhouse vocals, will take the Fair Day stage with a performance celebrating love, equality, and pride. Greg proudly released his debut original album Strings Attached in July.

Globe-conquering RuPaul’s Drag Race fan favourite Hannah Conda will grace the Pride Fair Day with a showstopping drag performance. Hannah did us so proud on UK vs The World season two earlier this year.

Queensland’s very first Drag Race Down Under star Beverly Kills will blend music and drag with a special DJ set and show on the Fair Day stage.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by (@thebeverlykills)

Brisbane Pride Fair Day will also spotlight local LGBTQIA+ talent with incredible showcases, including:

Point of Change – A remarkable showcase of 9 POC performers, each representing the vibrant diversity and creativity within the community.

Toucan Kings – Brisbane’s favourite Drag King collective will bring charisma, uniqueness, and fierce performances to the stage.

Podium by Peachy Keen – A dazzling group of six performers known for their high-energy, boundary-pushing performances.

More fabulous local drag acts and DJs will be announced ahead of Brisbane Pride’s Fair Day in two weeks.

Fair Day is on Saturday, September 21 at Musgrave Park. Tickets on sale now at brisbanepride.org.au

Read more:

Premier Steven Miles is joining Brisbane Pride March

Read the official Brisbane Pride Festival 2024 guide here

Thousands joined the 2023 Pride March across the Brisbane River

All of the winners at the 63rd Queens Ball Awards

For the latest LGBTIQA+ Sister Girl and Brother Boy news, entertainment, community stories in Australia, visit qnews.com.au. Check out our latest magazines or find us on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and YouTube.

[avatraang]

#27, azulaang 😶

THIS WAS SUCH A CHALLENGE!!! I’ve never written or even thought of these two in my life. But it was such a good test, thank you!! If any of y’all want to request a prompt and pairing, it’s from this post.

Without further ado, here is your azulaang fic <3

when the sun goes down.

It’s a rainy day when Aang feels her presence. To say they are tied together is an understatement – Aang is connected to all worlds, but to her more than most. The way his scar almost stands on end, a phantom of electricity ghosting across it. He often feels such thunder in his veins when she’s nearby, the universe’s way of reminding him that he is tied to her in more ways than the norm.

Azula has been out in society for a number of years already – indeed, her in public is not what threatens to surprise him. What almost throws off his balance is that she’s at the Southern Air Temple. He’s known of her presence since he landed there early that same morning, climbing the winding peaks til he’s sitting on a crumbling balcony, mediating on his past to gain clarity on his present and future. Upon giving it some thought, Aang comes to the conclusion that it isn’t so odd that Azula is at the Southern Air Temple. Indeed, before he’d personally seen that the remains of the monks and Fire Nation soldiers had been given proper funerals, the temple gave the clearest examples of the wrath the Fire Nation could produce. Even now that the bodies are gone and the temple cleaner, charred wood and blackened walls still lend evidence to the tragedies of times past. Aang supposes that him being here, the lone airbender mediating in the empty temple of his people, serves as even more proof. Azula, from what Zuko had told Aang, left to see first hand both the horrors and wonders of the world through newly unclouded eyes. Of course she’d stop here.

What drives home that Azula’s come along way from delivering blows rivaling death, is how she reveals herself to him. Sitting up on the balcony, Aang can feel her as she climbs the broken staircase towards him. Her footsteps are as silent as they were when they were children; if Aang weren’t the voice of the wind and if he were unable to feel the earth under his toes, he would not be able to tell she was coming. But her steps are still sensed by the ground, and the wind tumbles around her, interrupted by her small frame. Stepping out into the balcony, Azula crosses the threshold and moves to settle in front of Aang, so she is in full view of him. Aang is struck, easily and almost comically, by how different an image this is compared to times past. The circle of life is funny that way.

They sit there meditating for quite some time, the cool air flowing around them, the sun rising until it’s warming Aang’s nose. Air courses through his veins and through the temple, which, even after over a hundred years, still makes a pleasant noise when the wind runs through it. It sounds like the waves against the ocean, like muted wind chimes while one watches the flying bison play, like a baby’s sleepy laughter. The monks had designed it that way, and that way it had remained. Constant as the air around them.

Finally, Aang opens his eyes. The first thing he notices is that her hair is short. Unconventionally so – it’s short on the back and sides of her head (shorter than Sokka’s). It reminds him vaguely of his days with hair, back when he was hiding in the Fire Nation. It makes her face look sharper, but more open, too. A small scar rests on the top left corner of her upper lip, and there’s a tattoo on her right wrist. Azula opens her eyes and looks back at him, soaking him in with the same open wonder in which Aang is regarding her. “Hello.” Azula says, and for all intents and purposes she sounds exactly the same but also very different. There’s no anger or malice dripping in ever letter, just an openness that can only come from someone who has gotten to know themselves. “It’s nice to see you.” She gives him a smile that is so awkward, Aang finds it easy to see the resemblance between her and Zuko.

“The pleasure is all mine.” Aang says, and he means it. “What brings you here?”

Azula’s eyes widen only fractionally, but that is the only noticeable change in her demeanor. “I came here to see, for myself.”

Aang tilts his head, “And what do you think?”

“I think it must have hurt.” She purses her lips, wringing her small (dainty, yet Aang knows the power she wields so well) hands. There’s a note in her voice that Aang registers easily as compassion. He holds it for every living thing he sees. “It still hurts.” Azula looks past him, as if reaching for something she can’t see. The scar on his back tingles again. “I’m sorry.”

With an honest smile, Aang waves away her apology. “It’s not okay, but it’s also not your fault. There is no guilt on your shoulders or blood on your hands. I forgive everyone, and my people do, too.”

With a small shake of her head, Azula continues. “Not just about your people. I’m sorry about what I did to you. And to Zuzu, to Ty Lee, to Mai, Katara, Sokka, Toph, Suki.” Azula lists names like she’s spent the past few years writing them down every day. She gives him a sardonic sort of laugh. “Caldera City. Ba Sing Se. The world.” Aang doesn’t speak. Something tells him she isn’t finished. “I am sorry for what I’ve personally done, the hand I had in inflicting conflict onto the world. I’ve come a long way, still am coming a long way. I have my own personality and views, now.” Azula throws him a smile, a real one, that showcases her sharp canines and perfect teeth. “I know my purpose, my place. And I know I shouldn’t guilt myself, but there are people I owe proper apologies to. And you are one of them.”

“What’s your purpose?” Aang’s curiosity is piqued.

“To do what little I can to help people. To travel the world without any aim other than that.” Azula shrugs, “At least, for now. For now, I just want to help. However I can.”

And well, shit. He can’t think of a nobler, brighter purpose. And her apology is so genuine it almost hurts him. For a second Aang just stares, smiling brightly at her, entire body beaming like he is reaching for the sun. Then he realizes Azula might be weirded out by this, so Aang clears his throat and stands. Reaching down, he offers his hand to her. Tentatively, Azula takes it, letting him haul her to her feet. Aang pulls her up with more force than he ended up needing (she’s much lighter than he remembers) and as a result she ends up colliding with him. With a gust of wind behind him to keep them from crashing down the stairs, the two steady themselves and then step away from each other. Neither of them blush (one ever poised and the other ever shameless), but they both busy themselves with readjusting their clothes for a good while. Finally, Aang turns and motions for Azula to follow him. As they wander down the steps, skipping over missing ledges, Aang speaks. “For what it’s worth, your mission is amazing.” He looks over his shoulder at her, “Reminds me of my people.” Almost tripping over a missing step, Aang tears his eyes away and continues. “It’s all good, Azula. You’ve undergone more of a journey than most people do in a lifetime, and are determined to keep doing it.” He takes an exit on the second floor, crossing into a room that’s surprisingly untouched compared to the others. Momo is sitting on the window ledge, Appa resting down below in the courtyard on the first floor. Kneeling, Aang picks up a mostly deteriorated Pai Sho tile and vividly remembers Gyatso gifting him the game for his eleventh birthday. “I forgive you. I’m proud of you, and I’m proud to know you.” He tosses her the tile and smiles, a charming thing that could give birth to a million stars.

Azula stares. “It’s that easy for you?”

“Of course.” Aang says.

“How?”

He shrugs. Sits down on the stone slab that’s under the windowsill Momo’s sitting on. “Because everyone deserves love and forgiveness.” Aang says it simply, because to him it is so. “Especially someone who’s actively making an effort to do better.”

Azula’s eyes are owlish. She’s running the tile across her fingers, the tips of her ears red. “Was this your room?”

Aang doesn’t stop her from changing the subject. “Yes,” he says.

Azula eyes the space next to him, and sits down next to him with the same confidence one would have if he’d himself invited her to invade his space. “Tell me.” Azula says, “If it’s not too much to ask.”

Talking about his people is never too much to ask, so Aang does one of the things he does best: Tells her stories.

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