#NVMN Neverland

[phylophe]

PF Character Memes

Since I was feeling sick today and brain wasn't working...

@kimlime-pie @lazzuderp @djkalis @waffuruki thanks for allowing me to take your kids without permission.

[mahift]

A stupid shitpost. So Nergui got bonus from his patron, and Mik feels like there’s a valid reason for the boy to leave his swamp now.///leaves the explanation to Ophe//kek

[phylophe]

I didn’t see that cloth in his hand and was about to say “mind that you don’t slice your own hand open like that, Veve.” 

Disgusted, the assassin cleans the blood of those he disdains from his dagger. He can at least rest well that night knowing another blight is gone from the world. Target eliminated.

(2.5 hour drawing of Pathfinder OC Velis)

[phylophe]

NVM(N) just finished their second module and...

More than 3 years on and we're still talking about The Harrowing lore.

@kimlime-pie @lazzuderp

At least this one isn't about the dang cockatrice chicks.

[phylophe]

The children of Bramblebriar Daycare! 

I think it started off with a convo about who are the adults in each party and who are the children. 

Left → Right: Mirele, Neith, Nergui, Mikyur, Amur, Oka, Adeline, Malli (not part of daycare, she’s just here for a visit and may not ever come back).

Mr. Velis is the manager, Mr. Niyooshan is the nurse, Mr. Kebarong is the cook, Mr. Bronx is the maintenance man, and Miss Elasha is... nobody knows what Miss Elasha does there. She’s just there to spoil the children and occasionally dresses up one or two in branded clothes. 

Sketches by @lazzuderp​ Lines and colours by @phylophe

[phylophe]

A tribute to the amazing party that survived the first campaign I GM’ed! Thank you Deej, Kiyo, Laz, and Kimi for the great sportsmanship, enthusiasm, and support. //CRAI

Parody of the famous Gorillaz album cover, of course.

Top left: Velis Sepult Vellum, Tiefling Rogue/Assassin © @kimlime-pie Top right: Nergui Reissanderson Sylrona, Skinwalker Witch © @djkalis Bottom left: Neith Lupei, Catfolk Gunslinger/Swashbuckler © @waffuruki Bottom right: Mikyur Maidanee, Human Bard © @lazzuderp

[phylophe]

How PF PCs Take Their Coffee

Adeline: Thinks coffee is nasty

Amur: Not allowed caffeine due to possible consequences of heart palpitations and/or panic attacks

Bronx: Black, sometimes spiked with alcohol

Elasha: "Double espresso, hold the foam, actually no double foam, whipped cream, vanilla shot, can you add caramel to the sides? Wait no... okay yeah caramel, 75% sweetness, can you make that Splenda? Okay good. You have soy milk here right? Almond milk? You have both, alright. I'll take regular milk on mine."

Kebarong: Black, sometimes with sugar and/or milk

Malli: With four sugars and a vanilla shot

Mikyur: Black

Mirele: 2/3 milk and 1/4 sugar

Neith: With honey mead

Nergui: Black

Niyooshan: With the grounds still inside

Oka: Black

Velis: With just a sprinkle of sugar

[phylophe]

Mikyur: HDJDJFJFJF

Nergui: what is that

Velis: It’s a keyboard smash.

Nergui: how do I do it

Neith: just press anything lol

Nergui: 7

[phylophe]

Quotable Quotes and Memorable Moments

“From NVMN (& co.) in The Harrowing:

Character: Mikyur / Player: Laz @lazzuderp

Character: Neith / Player: Kiyo @waffuruki​

Character: Nergui / Player: Deej @djkalis​

Character: Velis / Player: Kimi @kimlime-pie​

GM and all mentioned NPCs: Yours Truly

In approximate chronological order: 

Quotes

Neith, all the time: “It’s good craftsmanship.” (Also Neith, at one particular moment: “I guess you can say... it’s good cardsmanship.”)

Velis, at the start: “I am a librarian.” Neith and Mikyur, every chance they get: “Aren’t you a libraaarian?” “Shouldn’t you know about that, Mr. Libraaarian?”

Mikyur, oftentimes: “Here comes INSPI-YAAAAAHHH COURAAAAAAAGE!!!”

Brambleson: “I’m Brambleson. Who are you?” Mikyur: “Mikyur!” Neith: “Neith.” Velis: “I’m Velis.” Nergui: “Peter.”

Brambleson: “I got there late though, so I only got to eat [Sonnorae’s] feetsies...” The Party: “.........” *silent horror*

Neith: “Hey Brambleson, you wanna try some of this?” *holds out infinite hipflask of mead* Brambleson: “Ooohhh...” *opens his mouth and tilts head up* Neith: “...” *pours some directly into his mouth*  Brambleson: “OOOH it makes me tingly! I like it!”  *later, upon a separate encounter* Brambleson to Neith: “You got more of that drink?” 

*Going to Barrow Island*  Nergui: *flies over* Neith: *climbs the steep slippery banks with cat-like reflexes* Velis: *slips all over the mud, barely managing to scramble up to the top of the banks, his invisibility ruined as he is now covered in mud* Mikyur: *critically fails to climb the banks, slips and almost slides under the end of the drawbridge into the water*

Barrow King: “Are you here to mourn?” Nergui, with zero hesitation: “NO.” The rest of the party: “WHYYYYYY.” GM: “Roll initiative.” 

Velis: *shows that he can fight, sneak attack, inflict bleed damage, use poison, go invisible, etc.* Neith: “What kind of a librarian fights like that?” Velis: “Well, being a librarian isn’t my only job--” Nergui: “Are you a bandit?” Velis: “No, I’m n--” Nergui: “It’s okay to be a bandit.”

Mikyur: *wanders off in the Prophet’s Garden* Velis: *throws a rock at him to get his attention, dealing maximum damage* Mikyur: “OWW WHY DID YOU THROW ROCKS AT ME???!!!” *flips his shit and throws rocks back at Velis, missing three times before giving up and sulking* 

Sonnorae: *gets baleful polymorphed into a frog, still clings stubbornly to Mikyur’s face* Everyone else: *tries to pull her off with no success* Mikyur, with tears in his eyes: “Guys, guys! Just stop!”

Sonnorae: *screaming way too much and too shrilly as a frog* Nergui: “Do you want me to turn her into something quieter...” Mikyur, getting a lightbulb moment: “Can you turn her into... a mole?” Nergui, clicking his fingers: “Done.” Sonnorae: *turns into a golden mole*

Mikyur and Laz: *literally cries*

Neith: *finds some drawers hidden in the walls of the Nightpeddler’s machine room*  Kiyo: “I open a drawer.” GM: “You hear *demented shrill moaning and crying* and see this.”

Kiyo: “I slam the drawer close.” 

Nergui: *casts Blood Biography on blood and gore on a bed* “...These are birthing fluids.”  Velis: *recoils in visible disgust* Nergui: *holds his soiled finger out towards Velis* Velis: “Touch me and you’ll lose that finger, boy.” 

Nergui: “You know how... clerics get powers from their deities? Well, I have my own, lesser-known god, and I get my powers from him or her.” Neith, without missing a beat: “So you’re a swamp cleric.”

*After the Eclipse event* Neith: “We destroyed the moon.” Neith: Neith: “Now there’ll be no night.”

Anyone other than Deej, after an enemy dies: “hOW diD yOu DiE?” [see Actually Dramatic Moments]

Neith, as Eleith and Nergui speak Auran to one another: “Get a room!”

Neith, holder of multiple extradimensional items, after learning about the consequences of putting one bag of holding into another: “...Oh.”

Mikyur, looming over Jocob’s shoulder: “Do you have any insects?” Jocob: “Uh, I have this--” *pulls out a dried dragonfly in a jar* Mikyur: *snatches it*

Mikyur, looming again: “Do you have peanuts?” Jocob: “I have boiled peanuts--” Mikyur: “Don’t want it. I want roasted peanuts.” 

Velis: *seriously considers how to most brutally sabotage the Nightpeddler’s wares* Velis: *sees caged cockatrice chicks amongst his wares* Velis: 

Mikyur: *shoots a lightning-charged bolt from between Rogg’s legs, hitting an Ogre Guard in the thigh, while the lightning travels to zap the ogre’s testicles* Brambleson, watching all this up close: *covers his own testicles* 

Everyone: *watches Eleith tear the succubi apart brutally*  Algon: “I hope no-one is enjoying this.”  Brambleson: *pulls his ears down* 

Mikyur, after misunderstanding Essessol’s insult to Agrasug as directed at him, moving to a spot outside of the line of fire, Messages Essessol: “Stupid bitch!”

GM: “Algon uses Smite Evil! ...How does Smite work again--” Kiyo, instantly: “I FUCKING KNEW IT!”

Neith, from inside a blue gem: “Hey Velis you look kinda blue.”  Velis: *internal panic, checks that he still has his disguise of human skin colour over his blue tielfling skin* 

Nergui, after a battle with shadow demons involving Magic Jars: “That wasn't too bad.” Mikyur, with smugshit face, having called it: “Uh-huh, having your soul sucked out of your body seems pretty bad to me.” Nergui: *closes the door between himself and Mikyur* Mikyur: *bars the door from the other side*

Mikyur: “What did I telllll you, huuuhhhhhh? Oh iT’s NOt A cULt, aSmODeuS dOESn’T Do CuLTs-- *continued unintelligible petty ranting*”

Velis: “There you are. I was about to find some rocks to throw at you again.” Mikyur: “Well I don't need to find rocks, I'll just have Rogg throw some at you!”  

GM: “Are you going to bring Eleith?” Deej: “Uh, no.” Neith to Nergui: “Gonna leave your girlfriend behind?” Ongaur to Nergui: “You got a girlfriend? Congratulations, boy!”

Zassrion: *roars in rage as the party enters his Grand Library* Neith, in Draconic: “FUCK YOU!”

All players: “Sonnobitch.”  All players: “Brambleboi.” All players: “Algon will be all-gone.” All players: “Ongaur Bongaur.” “Uncle Ongaur.”  All players: *ships Algon x Barrow King*

Clown Shoes Moments

Nergui buying forty full-sized pretzels and stuffing them all into his bag of holding. Bonus: Neith actually witnessing such act. 

Mikyur continuously failing to recall the details of his conversation with Rumul, the young Dwarven wizard, from two years ago.

Neith being in constant denial of magic. Everything is just “good craftsmanship”. 

Velis piling on lie after lie about his identity and putting in massive effort for his disguise, while the party remains suspicious the entire time and just don’t bother questioning him.

Nergui sucking at conferring information from his divination, often causing unnecessary panic or leaving out vital details.

Nergui eating nothing but pretzels (and the occasional frog or grub) for almost the entire duration of a week in the Harrowed Realm, and using pretzels to barter with Brambleson and Embor. 

Mikyur obsessing about seeing a Unicorn over the course of several sessions after seeing it on a card; by the time he actually gets to it, he becomes distracted by a pear tree instead.

Sonnorae --> Sonnobitch --> Sonnofrog --> Sonnomole

Nergui getting distracted by a frog while helping the others lift the healing berry plant out of the ground, and proceeding to literally drop everything to pounce on the frog.

Nergui accidentally putting the healing berry plant into a teapot with Tokens in them, and having to dig them back out discreetly.

Neith and Nergui trying to hastily restore Marzalee’s wax statues that they had broken on their way in, getting it all wrong (limbs on backwards, in the wrong places, extra/missing parts) in their panic.

The party really knowing how to make comfy camps.

Velis working out a way with Neith to store all the books he wants to take with him. It involves holding fees.

Velis trying and failing to set anything on fire at the Nightpeddler’s Camp.

Mikyur and Velis freaking out over cockatrice chicks.

Velis getting very fixated upon an expensive rug in the Nightpeddler’s tent.

Mikyur getting actually triggered by 1. Balimar’s fireball, 2. Nergui setting the Fortress’ Courtyard plants on fire, 3. Lamashtu’s statuette, and 4. the thought of cultists.

Brambleson having front row seats for multiple Striding Fortress fights, simultaneously being completely in the way.

Algon and the Barrow King always stepping past / beside / over one another. [Hence shipping.]

Neith and Mikyur literally bathing in the pile of coins.

Actually Cool Moments

Neith bursting through the tent of the Midnight Circus most dramatically, getting an intimidating jump on Bernaditi. 

Neith and her gun-fu.

Mikyur placating the Barrow King and the Grasping Dead by way of a critical hit with his lightning-charged crossbow, causing the electricity to radiate over the ground, eventually also winning the Barrow King’s favour and receiving his blessing.

The party, especially Velis, unanimously getting sick of the Unicorn’s condescending shit and deciding to murder him.

The party giving Algon an existential crisis, eventually leading to an alignment change.

Velis having just the right thing (Ticktock Man’s eyes) to trade Marzalee for her token.

Mikyur narrowly surviving Balimar’s fireball.

Nergui dominating Balio, giving him a sickle to kill himself. Balio, in rabid fury, swats away the sickle, and tears his own throat open. (Nergui, being spiteful, uses Blood Biography on him, asking him “How did you die?” to rewatch the violent death.)

Nergui straight up cutting the gangrene out of a sick slave’s leg with a dagger and no anaesthesia.

Eleith slowly tearing several succubi limb from limb, while everyone else watches on and offers the occasional ranged attack to help end the poor succubi’s misery.

Neith and Nergui succumbing to Magic Jar; their bodies overtaken by shadow demons, their eyes opening to black voids and bleeding smoky tendrils.

Nergui erecting a Blast Barrier just in time to block Zassrion’s lightning breath directed at Neith and himself.

Ongaur hacking Zassrion apart, and Algon somehow dealing the killing blow despite having lost his powers, rewriting his fate in the most dramatic way.

And finally, something memorable, funny, and awesome all at once...

The party making allies along the way, increasing the group to almost three times its initial size, and bringing a whole village to kill Zassrion in 24 seconds.

[mahift]

Sketched up concept for NVMN party's witchboi. Nergui asked Mikyur to help him buy some new clothes and shoes, coz "swamp hobo boi needs to look civilized to be accepted in civilization" lmao

The shirt has Crocodile motif embellished on its collar, sewn by Mikyur coz he thought having something as a ref of Nergui's heritage would make the witch be more confident of his own bloodline.

[phylophe]

Fuck/Marry/Kill

With CSS, Team BC, and NVMN

(Technically Adeline is a Kill for Mirele as well, but Mirele’s already tried)

Maybe I ought to have the rest do this again by the end of NVMN’s campaign though. 

[mahift]

POCKET SAND!!

Thank you Ophe for the game. //Fethug

Mikmik juz turned into petty lil shits now. XD

Quotable Quotes and Memorable Moments

“From NVMN (& co.) in The Harrowing:

Character: Mikyur / Player: Laz @lazzuderp

Character: Neith / Player: Kiyo @waffuruki​

Character: Nergui / Player: Deej @djkalis​

Character: Velis / Player: Kimi @kimlime-pie​

GM and all mentioned NPCs: Yours Truly

Keep reading

[phylophe]

Explanation: Nergui, a scaleheart skinwalker, has been living a hermitic, secluded life in fear of his crocodilian form manifesting around people and causing collateral damage. After some significant growth from an adventure, he has appeased his patron, who favoured him with a better ability to control his more bestial side.

What Mikyur, a bard who just wants to make friends with everyone and everything, understands from this:

"DO I HEAR...

Leaving your nest and embarking on travel and adventure??? "

A stupid shitpost. So Nergui got bonus from his patron, and Mik feels like there’s a valid reason for the boy to leave his swamp now.///leaves the explanation to Ophe//kek

[phylophe]

Uhuk, look at this awkward boya finally leaving his nest. //CRAI

I can’t get over the way you drew his hair. So fluffy, so cute. //CRAI MORE

Also that stylised motif of the crocodile is adorable. //CRAI EVEN HARDER

Sketched up concept for NVMN party's witchboi. Nergui asked Mikyur to help him buy some new clothes and shoes, coz "swamp hobo boi needs to look civilized to be accepted in civilization" lmao

The shirt has Crocodile motif embellished on its collar, sewn by Mikyur coz he thought having something as a ref of Nergui's heritage would make the witch be more confident of his own bloodline.