#NCTAU

[angeliqueiguess]

“Focus!” (Masterlist)

📸Pairing: Model!Jaehyun x fem!Photographer! Reader

📸Type: Socialmedia AU

📸Genre: Enemies to lovers, old friends to lovers, crack, fluff, angsty, slow burn

📸Synopsis: Internationally famous model Jung Jaehyun thinks he is invincible, with the world at his feet. So when he is paired with Y/n Suh, a humble photographer with zero tolerance for his inflated ego, their photoshoots turn into an all-out war of pride.

📸Fic State: finished

📸Spin Off’s: ongoing

angeliqueiguess all rights reserved. Please do not copy, reupload, translate, or modify my work for use on other accounts or platforms. Thank you!

Profiles. ONE TWO

Prologue

��ONE The More You Know.

📸TWO Meeting:Ruined

📸THREE No-Show?

📸FOUR Missing

📸FIVE The Audacity

📸SIX Welcome

📸SEVEN Creep

📸EIGHT Heaven Knows

📸NINE Really?...

📸TEN Sunset

📸ELEVEN Jealousy

📸TWELVE Still

📸THIRTTEEN Roses

📸FOURTEEN Locket

📸FIFTEEN Contract?

📸SIXTEEN Session

📸SEVENTEEN Talk

📸EIGHTEEN Whirldwind

📸NINETEEN Crying

📸TWENTY Hope

📸TWENTY-ONE Unknown

📸TWENTY-TWO Fbi mode

📸TWENTY-THREE Sorry Ten

📸TWENTY-FOUR Mutual

📸TWENTY-FIVE Locket pt.2

📸TWENTY-SIX Heated

📸TWENTY-SEVEN Slick

📸TWENTY-EIGHT Gucci

📸TWENTY-NINE Growth

📸THIRTY Slow

📸THIRTY-ONE Photographs

📸THIRTY-TWO Late

📸THIRTY-THREE Morning

Epilogue

📸CHARACTER ENDINGS📸

ONE - TWO - THREE

📸SPIN OFF'S📸

Christmas Edition

Vacation Edition

THREE

FOUR

FIVE

updated 02/01/2025

Angelique’s note: Heyya! Just dropping this here real quick (I kinda got carried away with my ideas and ended up picking the one with Jaehyun as the main character 😅). Still can’t believe he won’t be with us until 2026 :(, but instead of feeling down about his enlistment, I thought, why not make this SMAU? Love you guys! Over and out. 🚀❤️

[yaasirambles]

HeartRacer- Lee Jeno NCT

I wrote this a while ago for @jammingjaem and I decided to edit it and post it as a y/n piece!

Word Count: 2,687

Warnings: Mentions of illegal activities (street racing) and mentions of Consumption of Alcohol

Plot: In which you're Jeno's friend and he races with his motorcycle. He invites you out one night to come watch his race.

Racer!AU, SFW :) Cute lil thing

“Annndd done! Thank God. This essay was gonna be the death of me,” You say to yourself. You clicked the SUBMIT button and closed your laptop. You throw your head back on the chair. Closing your eyes and spinning slowly. 

*clink* 

You open one eye. Nothing around. You shrug your shoulders and close your eyes. Letting out a deep breath. 

*clink*---*clink*--- *clink**clink**clink*

You jump out of the chair and pull up your window, leaning out and looking down, scanning around the dark yard. Then, you see the cause of your disturbance. 

“UGH, YOU!” You shout in frustration

“Gee, nice to see you too.” Jeno rolls his eyes

“What do you want, Jeno?” 

“I’m coming up. Move back” 

“What? No, don’t you dare-” You back up. You hear him run, and his feet land on the wall as he climbs up the wall, the lattice screen on it helping him get a grip as he climbs, probably ruining the flowery vines on the way up. You saw his fingers at the edge of the window sill. He pulls himself up and jumps into your room, standing right in front of you. Barely an inch between you two. His face looked down on you. Your breath catches in your throat, and your heart flutters a bit. You back up and clear your throat. 

“I wanted to see if you’ll come to my race tonight. Please, please, please.”

“No, Jeno. I already told you. I just spent 4 hours on this essay, and my brain is burnt out.”

“Aha, see, I knew that might be the case. So I got you iced coffee, and it’s waiting for you. Chenle has it downstairs.” He looks at you with those stupid puppy eyes. 

“Uggghhh. Fine. But I’m going in the car. Not on that death trap you call a motorcycle.”

“Fine, fine. As long as you’re coming. Oh, there’s also gonna be a kickback/party type thing after, and we’re going to that too. It’s Friday, so I know you can’t use school as an excuse not to go.”

“Ok, whatever. Well, I need to change then in that case.” you sigh, walking to your closet. You didn’t hear anything, so you turned around. Jeno is staring at you, leaning against your desk. Arms crossed. “Ummm”

“What?” he raises an eyebrow at you.

“LEAVE. I’m not gonna change in front of you.” 

“Why? Scared we’ll end up kissing or something.” He smirks

“AGGHH, LEE JENO!” You throw a shirt at him. 

He throws his hands up in the air defensively. “I’m kiddiiing. I’ll be at the meet. Renjun and the other dreamies are waiting in the car downstairs. See ya there, my lucky girl.” He hops out of the window. 

You roll your eyes and rummage through your closet. You were slightly panicking because you wanted to look good. Not for him. Pfft nevvveerrrr. Okay, maybe just a little….whatever. You decide on a pair of ripped black jeans, gray vans, a red crop top that says “CHERRY BOMB.” and a light wash jean jacket. You rush down the stairs and hop in the back seat of Renjun's car.

“Where’s my coffee?” you demand, holding your hand out.

“Right here, Ma’am.” Chenle hands you the cup, and you take a long drink from the straw. 

“Ok, let’s go, kids,” you say. Renjun nods.

You end up on some long, empty streets. A crowd bustling in the middle. You thought it’d be smaller. It was a street race, after all. Kinda illegal… Not at all, somewhere you would be regularly. You walk with the dreamies, following them, trying to find your group. You’re a huge group, yet you always manage to lose each other. You spot your best friend and her Boyfriend, Jaehyun. They’re the couple of the group, and they've been together for two years. She’s in black jean shorts, fishnets, A black bralette, and boots. Jaehyun in black jeans, vans, a white t-shirt with rolled-up sleeves, one arm around her, the other hanging onto his Jean jacket slung over his shoulder. They are a power couple. You think to yourself, I wonder if Jeno and I could be like that...nope, no, ma’am. No interest in that hooligan. Cute, stupid, reckless-

“Y/N. YOU’RE HERE, YESSS!” someone shouts, snapping you out of your head. Your best friend was running to you. “I’m so glad you came! How’d he convince you?” she pulled you in for a hug.

“Bribery of the highest degree,” you say and point to the iced coffee. “I can’t resist free coffee.”

“Of course,” she laughs. “Well, c’mon. Everyone is further down. We’re all at the start line, so we can see Jeno come in first.” she grabs your hand and leads you to the rest of your group. Everyone comes walking towards you to say Hi. Johnny picked you up and squeezed you. You go through the round of hugs and cheek kisses as greetings.

You look around the area. Motorcycles are placed in the middle of the street, behind the start/finish line. Their riders hanging around, talking to people. You spot Jeno talking to some girl. A really pretty girl… Your heart drops a little as you see him smile at her. It's probably his secret girlfriend or something. He catches you, and his eyes light up. He jogs towards you, and the girl follows. He looks so good in that stupid race jacket. 

“Hey! Wow, you look… great,” he breathes out, staring you up and down. “Oh, um, this is my friend. She and Her girlfriend are race girls. You know, the one who waves the flags for us to go.”

“Ohh! That’s cool!  It’s nice to meet you! I’m Y/N,” You say

“I’m Min! So nice to meet you.” She pulls you in for a hug. “It’s almost time to start! I’ll see you at the party?” 

You nod, and she smiles and runs off to gather the riders at the start line. 

“You’re gonna be in the front, right?” he asks.

“Yeah, of course. It’s where the rest are. so you know..” You respond, playing with the hem of your shirt awkwardly 

“Awesome, cool, cool, cool. Um, well, I better get in position. Kiss my key?”

“Your key??” You raise an eyebrow at him 

“Yea. You know, for good luck. Please?” he holds it out. 

You roll your eyes and kiss the blade of the key. He smiles widely and runs off to his Motorcycle. Your heart flutters again…

You walk over to the front of the sidelines where your friends are. Jeno and another rider are the first, with four others behind them. Engines were revving up, and people were cheering for their chosen rider. You wave to him, and he waves back with a gloved hand. How the hell does he look so handsome with a helmet on?? You can’t even see his face, but you know he looks good. Ugh. 

“Are we ready racers?” Min shouts

“On our count!” her girlfriend shouts. 

“One!” Min raises her flags.

“Two.” Her girlfriend's flags go up as well.

“Three!!” the engines revving loudly. 

“GO!” they both scream, waving the flags down and kneeling as the bikes fly past them. You run into the street along with many others to see the bikes take off. Some people chase after them. The crowd moves back to the sides as the racers come back to finish the first lap—two more to go. Jeno is the 3rd to come in this lap. You bite your lip, praying he wins. The last lap comes around, and you peer out, waiting impatiently. You see his bike leading, and he burns through the finish line. Your group screams in victory, and he starts doing donuts in the street as the other racers trail behind. You run to his bike, and he hops off, pulling off his helmet, hugging you, picking you up, and spinning you. 

“See! I told you, my lucky charm.” He grins ear to ear. His eyes sparkled, and his chest rose and fell heavily. 

“I would have been so mad if I came and missed out on sleep just to see you lose” You rolled your eyes. Your heart flutters secretly. 

“Hey, you guys ready to head to the party?” YangYang says, walking up to you. 

“Yea. We’ll see you there.” Jeno said, taking your hand. “C’mon.”

“Uhhhh. I’m going with Dreamies,” You said, raising an eyebrow.

“Uhhhh no, you’re not. Ride with me. Please? I just won the race, and you saw I’m a safe driver, pleeeasssseee” He begged, again with stupid puppy eyes. 

“Fine. If I die, I’m killing you.” You huff and let him lead you to his motorcycle. 

He takes an extra helmet out and places it on your head. Smiling at you. He climbs on, and you get behind him. Your hands grip his shirt tightly. Too scared to wrap your arms around his waist. He revs the engine loudly, and you roll your eyes. What a show-off. Suddenly, the bike jerks forward, and your arms wrap tightly around him in fear of falling off. You can feel him laugh lightly.

“You did that on purpose, so I’d hug you like this,” you grumbled. 

“Maybe. Maybe not. Prove it.” He chuckles. You roll your eyes again, and he takes off. You keep your eyes closed the entire time. Too afraid to open them. The sound of you guys whipping past cars and the loud wind was already terrifying. You didn’t want to see the flying lights just yet. 

We arrived at a huge white house. It's seriously huge—pillars at the front porch. Magnificent garden. Different colored lights on the lawn, music blaring out the front door. You grabbed Jeno’s arm tightly, and he patted your hand. 

“Is this too much?” He asked, concerned

“No. No, it’s okay. I should be fine.” You smiled at him.

He nodded, and you walked inside. He was being greeted by people who knew him, congratulating him on his win at the race. 

“Ah, it was all thanks to my Lucky Charm here.” He says to the people,  smiling at you.

You continued to walk through the house, trying to find your group.

“Who’s house is this?” you asked. 

“Mins. Her parents left her everything since she has no siblings.”

“Oh. Is it just her alone here? It must be hard for her.”

“No, her girlfriend lives here. And she rents out the rooms to people for cheap. Mostly college students since the university is close by. Or for free if there’s a family or individuals who need help for a bit.” 

“Her parents are probably super proud of her for that. Wow.” you sighed.

“Hey!! Glad you got here in one piece.” Min came running up to you, hugging you both. “There’s tons of food in the kitchen, so please help yourself with anything you want. There are drinks too. Pool in the back as well if you wanna swim.” 

“OH, FOOD, thank god!” Jeno exclaimed. Throwing his head back. “Okay, we will be in the kitchen. Thanks, Min!” He started pulling you away, so you waved goodbye to her as she laughed. 

Mark was in the kitchen as well. He was getting pizza and a drink. 

“Hey, y/n. Do you want a drink?” He asks, “There's some jungle juice in here.”

“What’s that?” you asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Like just a bunch of alcohol and juice or soda mixed. There's also Soju Lemonade.” 

“Soju Lemonade, please,” you say, and he nods and fills up a red solo cup with the drink. 

Jeno looks at you questioningly. “I didn’t know you drank.”

“Sometimes. Not often.” you sip on the lemonade. It was refreshing

“Hmm, hiding a wild side from me?” 

“Find out,” you smirk. The alcohol was making you a little brave already.

“Sheesh. I might” 

You walked out to the back, finding the rest of your group playing beer pong against each other. You watched and finished the rest of your drink by the time they were done with the game. 

“Wanna play next round?” Johnny asks you.

“I’ve never played before..” you say shyly.

“Don’t worry! I’ll be your partner,” your best friend says. “We can play against Jaehyun and Jeno.” 

“Oooooo, Boyfriends vs. girlfriends, I like that!” Johnny exclaims, 

“Jeno is not my boyfr-” you start to say before someone hands a ping pong ball to you. 

“Ladies first,” Jaehyun says, smirking at your best friend.

“You guys are going down,” She laughs. 

The game was competitive. A small crowd gathered around to watch. Unfortunately, you did have to drink as many cups as you made them drink due to making the ball in the cup. It was down to the last cup on both sides—your turn. If you miss, you lose. You concentrated on the opening and threw the ball. It landed, and the boys hung their heads in defeat. The crowd cheered, and you and your best friend high-fived and hugged. 

“I will request my prize later tonight,” She said to Jae, kissing him on the cheek. 

“And what do you want for yours,” jeno asked, looking at you. “A kiss?” 

“No. You can buy me coffee for a month,” you smiled. Chance at free coffee for a month. Imma take it. Hhehehe

“Fine,” He huffed. “Sure you don’t want a kiss with that?”

“I’m okay, thanks.”

You walk back into the house. You realize how much you drank and start to feel a little tired. You sit down on the couch, and Jeno follows. 

“You okay?” He asks. 

“I think I had a bit too much. But I'm okay.”

Then Haechan comes up and slumps down next to you, trying to give you another drink. Jeno shoots him a glare and takes the drink. 

“Don’t. No more for her tonight” He says, concern and sternness in his voice. Haechan nods and says sorry. Your heart fluttered again at Jeno’s words. 

Jisung walks up to you. 

“Do you need anything? A blanket? Food? Is it too loud? You can have your earbuds to listen to your playlist,” He says. What a caring boy. 

“No, I’m okay. Thank you, JiJi.” you smile at him. 

You spend the rest of the time watching your friends, talking and Laughing. Enjoying being with them. 

“How are you feeling? Ready to go home?”

Jeno asks, patting your head.

“Mm. Yea. I think I’m sobered up enough. Let’s go,” you say, standing up. 

You say goodbye to everyone, and you hop back on his bike. Your arms around him comfortably. This time, you keep your eyes open. The lights look pretty as you speed by. You look up and see the stars and the moon moving with you. It’s mesmerizing. You arrive at your house. He holds his hand out to help you off. He takes off your helmet and walks you to the front door. 

“Did you have fun?” He asks,

“I did, actually. A lot of fun. Thank you for inviting me.” You said,

“Thank you for coming. And supporting me. It means a lot to me.” He leans in and kisses your forehead.

Maybe it was the last bit of alcohol giving you courage, or maybe you were finally not overthinking things. But you kissed his lips without thinking. He froze a little. Surprised. Then his hands were on your waist, pulling you closer to his body, and the kiss deepened a little. His lips were soft. You pulled away. His face was full of shock.

“What was that for?” He asked.

“Part of your prize for winning the race. And you know, good luck for your drive home,” you said, trying to seem casual while your heart was beating up and out of your throat. 

“Ahh. Thank you. I hope I get those often.” He smiled.

“Maybe. You’ll have to find out. I’ll be expecting you with my coffee tomorrow.” 

“Yes, Ma’am.” 

you smiled and unlocked your front door. He doesn’t leave until you close it behind yourself. Maybe you’ll think less and just let things happen…

[zeroseuniverse]

Something In Common

Word Count: 505 Summary: "No, it's fine," he said, voice quiet but firm. "I hate me too. It’s something we can have in common." Pairing: Winwin X Reader

Navigation

The air was thick with tension, the kind that settled between two people when too much had been said—and yet, not enough. You stood across from WinWin in the dimly lit practice room, arms wrapped around yourself as if the pressure of your own hold could keep you from shattering completely.

He wouldn’t look at you. His eyes were glued to the floor, fingers clenched into fists by his sides. You could see the rise and fall of his chest, the weight of unspoken words pressing against his ribs.

"You hate me. I get it."

Your breath hitched. "No, WinWin, I—"

You wanted to deny it, to tell him he was wrong, but the words tangled in your throat. How could you? After everything that happened, after all the things you left unsaid, all the times you pushed him away when all he did was try to reach you?

WinWin let out a hollow chuckle, finally lifting his gaze to meet yours. His eyes weren’t angry—they were tired. Worn out from the endless cycle of misunderstandings and unspoken feelings.

"No, it's fine," he said, voice quiet but firm. "I hate me too. It’s something we can have in common."

Your heart cracked at the way he said it, like he had long since accepted that he was impossible to love. Like he truly believed he wasn’t worth fighting for.

"That’s not true," you whispered.

He tilted his head slightly, an almost amused look crossing his features. "Then why do you always pull away?"

You swallowed hard. "Because… I'm scared."

WinWin didn’t move for a moment, but you could see the way his expression softened, just barely. He sighed, running a hand through his hair before looking at you again. "Scared of what?"

"Of ruining you. Of ruining us."

It was selfish, really. You had spent so much time convincing yourself that you were the problem, that staying away from him was for the best. That if you let yourself love him the way you wanted to, you’d only bring him down.

But now, looking at him, seeing the way he held himself together like he was afraid of breaking apart, you realized—

You had already hurt him by keeping your distance.

WinWin took a careful step toward you. "You don’t get to decide that for me."

You blinked, breath catching.

"If you hate yourself, then fine," he murmured. "But don’t use that as an excuse to push me away."

Tears stung the corners of your eyes as his words sank in. You had been so caught up in your own fears that you hadn’t even noticed how much it affected him. How much he had been hurting, too.

Slowly, hesitantly, you reached out. Your fingers brushed against his, and for a moment, he didn’t move. Then, ever so gently, he closed the distance between you, his hand warm against yours.

"You don’t have to go through this alone," he said softly.

And for the first time in a long time, you let yourself believe him.

[kiachiako]

hold fast | l.jn

pairing | jeno x female!reader

synopsis | After finding hand scribbled messages in a novel of the quaint bookshop you work at, you start a paper dependent back-and-forth with an anonymous penman; a small part of you, however, hopes that your brother’s cold best friend may have a hand in their mysterious appearances.

content | brother!jaemin, brother!jaehyun, au, fluff, language warning

wc | 11.1k

song | all the stars — kendrick lamar, sza

a/n | my first longer fic, hope u enjoy it! leave any and all feedback, i’d love to hear ur thoughts :))

…

Maybe it was the caffeine rushing through your veins at the ripe hour of 3 am, a seemingly perfect time to sneak out of your parents' house. Or maybe it was the desperation to get away from your textbooks haunting you out of sleep, leading to an all-nighter in which you almost caved into the temptation to burn your hellish flashcards. When the devil couldn't reach you, he sent not only a brother to torment your every waking moment but a Satan reincarnate called physics summer homework. Who assigns homework during the summer anyway?

Wanting to get away from the stress of life for a while, you had planned to walk out your front door unbothered. But of course, nothing goes without the notice of your twin brother.

Neon lights highlighting the sharp angles on his face, Jaemin's eyes trailed your walking form as you attempted to sneak out through the living room an hour earlier. With his gaming set-up littered with empty wrappers and neglected work, you returned his stare with disgust as he reclined on the couch without a care in the world.

Fortunately, Jaemin cared more about the game he was winning than you traipsing out in the dark alone; judging by the screaming that was blaring through his headphones, he'll be up playing with his closest friends into the late morning.

They're all like him: infuriatingly annoying and always too loud. So loud that you purposely make plans to go out whenever you see his friends pull up to the Na household. You're sure that at least some of them are kinder than your brother, but you've never stuck around long enough to find out.

Although it might not appear so to others, you and Jaemin's relationship is anything but bad; he cares for you in the most tsundere of ways, and his constant teasing is simply the nature of his own personality. You know that he will call you in a good two hours to make sure you're alive (although he'll probably argue that the call is not out of love, but because his hoodie has mysteriously disappeared which you or may not have "borrowed" a week earlier).

Your relationship is complimentary like that, unspoken care for each other masked under the daily mocking and ignoring each other at school. Now that your eldest brother, Jaehyun, is away at university, it's just the two of you. You cover for each other when you want to skip out on a few classes or when Jaemin has a girl over that your parents didn't know about, and that works perfectly fine for you. Tonight is no exception.

After unlocking your bike from a nearby pole and walking it down the empty suburban street, it only took a quick ride to reach your final destination.

And that brings you to your current position; staring at the bookstore window with a set of keys dangling precariously from your fingers. Technically this wouldn't be breaking in, right?

At an hour in which the late party-goers have finally stumbled home and the early risers have not yet awoken, there is no one around to see you enter the quaint storefront at said ungodly hour. And so, against your better judgement, you quickly unlock the door and slip into the darkness.

You had chosen the bookstore job over the summer for a reason; it provided not only a quiet place to get away from when the chaos got too much at home, but you were surrounded by endless entertainment. People-watching from behind the counter with a pile of to-be-read books and a glass of iced tea had been your expected routine for the past few months, and it has been more than fulfilled as summer break reaches its end.

The store owner is a kind old woman who insisted on raising your pay within the first week, but she's rarely in town to care for the shop. That leaves you to yourself with a variety of intriguing customers, a plethora of mystery novels, and air conditioning (thank god) to escape to during sticky august heat waves.

And that is also why your soul absolutely leaves your body in shock when you whirl around to face Mrs. Lee — your boss who, by the way, said she wouldn't be back for another month. A surprised noise leaves the back of your throat, awkwardly bowing to her as she stares at you in amusement.

"Mrs. Lee, funny to run into you at this hour. You're back earlier than I expected," you say, wracking your brain for a plausible excuse to why you'd be at the shop six hours before opening time.

"Yes, honey," she replies, turning to the side to put her bag down, "I wanted to come back a little earlier so you wouldn't have to take care of the shop on your own when school starts."

You nod and move a little farther into the shop. "Sorry for coming so early. I just needed somewhere to go for a little bit." The old woman turns to you, her eyes crinkling as she smiles kindly at you.

"Never apologize, Y/N. I understand that we all have our own struggles, hmm?" and with another mysterious smile, she turns her back to you and disappears into the back room.

Still left a bit confused, you shrug, make your way around the counter, and settle into the plush cashier's chair.

With the dim moonlight filtering through azure-tinted display windows and a stinging smell of citrus keeping you company, you find your eyes growing heavier and heavier as the night ticks away.

…

You think you've made it to heaven when you wake up to a halo of sunlight blinding your eyes into oblivion.

And, of course, the blaring ringing of your phone buzzing incessantly on the counter in front of you.

Still in a bit of a haze, you reach for your phone, only to answer to a—

"Jesus fucking christ, Y/N, do you know how long I've been calling you? And," you move the device away from your ear as Jaemin's screeching voice carries over into the previously peaceful bookshop, "where the hell is my black hoodie? I don't care if you're passed out in a ditch somewhere, just get me my hoodie back before school starts tomorrow."

"Shit," you mutter under your breath as you look down at your clothes sheepishly, realizing that the soft fabric you were sleeping on is actually your brother's favorite piece of clothing. Pulling out the remnants of a used blunt from the front pocket, you roll your eyes. Yup, definitely Jaemin's.

Reluctantly dragging yourself from your cozy sleeping spot, you mumble, "okay okay, Jaem. Chill out for a sec, hmm? I'm alive." You make your way over to the door. "But I won't be soon if you keep shouting in my ear like that. You're about to give me a permanent migraine."

Jaemin scoffs before you hear three beeps marking the end of your lovely conversation. Of course he would hang up on you.

After a quick bike ride back to your house to freshen up — in which you thankfully did not run into your brother — you stop by a coffee shop for an americano and make your way back to the bookshop to open up.

Mrs. Lee waves at you with her oversized sunhat and myriad of trinkets in tow, before leaving the shop all to you for the day.

A few uni students and an old man come in throughout the quiet august afternoon, looking for the average last minute history textbooks and poetry collections. You smile at every customer and drink your much-needed caffeine before resuming to the task of cataloging new shipments, a very null job for such a warm day.

And you're still in that state of mind when he walks in. Like a fever dream, if you have to call it something. His pale hair reflects in golden sunlight as it falls comfortably against the nape of his neck, a small pack of cigarettes poking out of his back pocket. Delicate silver chains fall right down the center of his chest, and you can't help but wonder where you have seen a person this stunning. He strikes such a familiar chord in the back of your head, but you just can't pinpoint it.

He carries an untouchable aura, glancing at you before passing to reach the books that reside in the depth of the shop.

So, with your legs comfortably curled up beneath you, you squint at him for a second before deciding that figuring out how you might know him is a waste of brain power.

After he walks away, you try to re-immerse yourself in your novel multiple times, but you can't help but glance up at whatever he's doing. Head tilted, your eyes follow him in curiosity as he confidently makes his way into the romance section. It’s a complete contradiction too, the dark clothing and motorcycle helmet tucked under his arm being the last thing one would expect on an avid romance reader. You like that, no shame.

He disappears out of view, the scent of lime and cedar cologne lingering after him. You grow more confused as he stays in that aisle for ten, twenty, thirty minutes (not that you're counting or anything).

He finally walks out with a non-readable look on his face and his hands empty, devoid of any books. His eyes shine as if he knows something you don't while walking casually past your spot behind the counter.

"Uh, have a good afternoon...?" you call after him as he shoots you a small smile before pushing his way into the summer heat, leaving nothing behind but the pungent smell of citrus and an air of mysteriousness.

"I- everybody is so weird today," you mumble to yourself, shaking your head and leaning back into your chair.

You make a mental note to check out that romance corner later. What could possibly be in the romance section that could keep him in there for over thirty minutes?

You've never had a thing for romantic novels or romance in general, especially after seeing your parent's marriage hit its rough patches and your heartbreaker of a brother in action. Jaemin has an allure about him that makes girls fall right into his trap, and you've watched too many of his flings run out of his room sobbing.

Your mom and dad describe him as "charming." You don't see it.

…

"See what, Jaemin?" You stare at him incredulously. "You're imagining things, there is no damn stain on your clothes." Shoving past your brother with a mouthful of cereal, you call out "we're literally late, hurry up!"

Jaemin shoots you a dirty look, chucking his student ID at you. "I swear to god Y/N— if I see a drop of coffee on my hoodie today, you better sleep with one eye open."

You ignore him and make your way out the front door, taking a deep breath of crisp morning air before you feel a hand knock into the back of your head. Hard. Your brother sticks his tongue out at you cheekily before making his way over to a sleek, black motorcycle. Something he bought to fit the "badboy" agenda he and his friends are so intent on fulfilling.

Swinging your leg over the vehicle behind him, a loud rev fills your neighborhood before you're shooting through the suburban streets that lead to your school.

Two blocks before you reach the entrance, Jaemin stops to let you off. It's always been your tradition; ignore each other's presence at school and no drama will ensue. You know just how much some of his secret admirers would probably go insane if he was seen riding to school with a girl behind him.

"I hope you have a shitty first day," your brother says, still convinced that you spilled your drink onto his sweatshirt this morning. Giving him an irritated look, you wish him the same and turn to walk towards the entrance separately.

Slipping into your assigned homeroom five minutes later, you're met with a girl throwing her arms around you in a bone-crushing hug, her pretty face framed by freshly bleached, blonde hair.

"Sol, you're going to annihilate my lungs if you don't let go of me," you say, pretending to struggle to breathe. The girl behind you giggles, wrapping her arms tighter around you.

"I haven't seen you in a whole month and this is how you treat your best friend? Damn Y/N, I'm hurt."

You and Sol nudge each other playfully, setting your bags down and catching up on each other's summers. The daughter of wealthy business owners, she spends her summer break at her grandparents' estate in Jeju, preventing you from meeting each other.

"God, it's been so long," Sol looks at you with a smile, hopping up to seat herself on the empty teacher's desk. The bell hasn't rung yet, resulting in a half empty classroom and the noise of chatter flooding in from the hall and the open windows. She taps at your school uniform's short skirt teasingly. "We look hot, ready for the first day of hell or what?"

You grin, seated on a student's desk with your feet propped up on a chair.

"I wouldn't be here if I wasn't, now would I?"

…

Only half way through the day and you're ready to go home and drop dead on your mattress. You forgot how tiring school is both physically and mentally, especially with the thought of all the homework assignments you've collected today already.

You collapse against the lockers next to Sol's in the back of the classroom, her eyes scanning your tired face for a few seconds before turning to her handheld mirror.

"Is it just me or do you want to die," you say, turning your head to watch Sol touch up her lip tint.

"Not just you girl," she replies, grabbing the sleeve of your uniform and dragging you down the hall. "Now let's go eat. Food heals the soul." Your eyes light up at the mention of lunch, pace quickening through the crowded halls.

Entering the school cafeteria is like watching a drama unfold before your eyes. You either belong to a group or you don't, the sound of laughing and chatting echoing off of your academy's high ceilings.

Right away, your eyes are drawn to the right after hearing an especially familiar laugh.

With a groan, you nudge Sol's arm.

"Fuck my life, truly." She looks in the direction your eyes are so conveniently averted from and laughs like she's never heard a funnier joke in her life. "I can't believe I didn't think to ask him what lunch he has this semester..." you trail off, Sol still laughing next to you — she's one of the only people who know about the interesting brother-sister relationship you two have, or even the mere fact that the infamous Na Jaemin has a twin sister in the first place. She knows you would die in annoyance to even be mentioned in the same sentence as him, especially with the stupid persona he holds up to his classmates.

And then there's Jaemin, sitting with his group of friends in all his glory. You look around, spotting a few girls at surrounding tables nudging each other and giggling about how attractive they are (something that you could definitely go without hearing about).

You tap Sol, nodding to your own group of friends across the cafeteria.

The moment you turn away just happens to be the moment your brother catches sight of you, his smile wiping right off his face. He glances down at the silver bento box you're holding, mouthing something incomprehensible to you with an annoyed expression on his face.

You pause and look down at the box, letting out a groan when you realize that you must have taken Jaemin's lunch instead of yours this morning. You would honestly rather buy lunch from school, but your parents insist on taking leftovers from dinner instead.

Sol glances at all the girls staring at your brother's table, looks at you, and breaks out in a man-eating grin. "Good luck with that," she whispers to you, referring to the first time you're going to be interacting with your idiot of a sibling at school. "I'll be over," she points, "there!" And with that, she leaves you alone to fend for yourself while your friends get free entertainment.

You sigh before begrudgingly making your way over to Jaemin. You can feel the eyes on you, but frankly, you can't bring yourself to care anymore. Jaemin has caused you this much trouble throughout your life already by making you walk to class when he could simply drop you off at the entrance. A little interaction won't hurt.

"—and I know right, she's not even all that. I swear, the nerve of girls these days..." a boy with striking features and blonde streaks through his hair trails off mid sentence, his eyes glancing up and down your figure as you stroll up to your brother.

You stare at Jaemin for a second before tossing him his lunch, the box hitting the table much harder than you intend it to.

"Hey hey, woah there," Jaemin raises his eyebrow at you, "no need to be so aggressive with me."

You frown, gesturing to your lunch in his hands. "Can I have mine now—"

You're interrupted by a hand on your arm. "Who's this Jaemin, a new thing of yours or what?"

You and Jaemin almost gag at the same time. He turns to his friend, incredulous.

"Didn't I tell you that I have a sister? I could've sworn that I've mentioned it before," Jaemin says pointedly at the boy next to him.

"Shush Jaem, I would've remembered if the Na boys had a sister with those genes," he's fast to reply, shooting a grin at you.

"Shut up, Hyuck."

"Her name—"

"Shut up."

"My Kakao—"

"You can shut up now. Before I hit you for real," your brother threatens, raising a fist playfully for added effect.

Mark butts in with a helpful, "Jaem boxes now too."

Your sight unfocuses as Jaemin and his friends continue to add on and bicker among themselves, your eyes wandering to the end of their table.

That's when you catch sight of a familiar mess of white hair, his soft gaze trained on his laughing friends as he fiddles with his silver rings. His uniform jacket is thrown casually over his shoulders, your school's emblemed tie dangling loosely around his collar.

Your eyes widen. The boy from the book shop yesterday. He's my brother's friend?

It's as if you get caught in a trance while staring at him, like you wouldn't be able to physically look away even if you wanted to. He looks simply unreal from where you're standing, the afternoon sun painting shades of gold onto his face as a halo of light seeps through his hair.

You flinch in surprise when his gaze flicks over to you, looking up through his lashes with a hard, unwavering gaze.

Before you can look away, your brother pushes you at the hip and stares up at you with an expression you know all too well: can you leave me the fuck alone now.

You sneak one last glance at the white-haired boy — who’s staring back now — before snatching your lunch from Jaemin’s hands and rushing to your own table. With a groan, you drop your head onto the table as your friends rub your back soothingly.

“Shh, Y/N, I know that must’ve drained you. It’s okay-” Sol laughs, patting your head.

She stops mid sentence when you lift your head up with the most dazed expression she’s ever seen on your face, eyes glazed over and hand trying to hide a smile.

“What happened for you to have a look like that on your face,” Chaeyoung questions, squishing your face between your fingers as you pout at the table.

“Guys,” you start, before letting your head drop down to the table once more. “I think I’m in love.”

…

“What am I even doing,” you mumble to yourself, unlocking the front door with your fingerprint before slipping inside.

You never come home right after school, usually going to the convenience store with your friends or straight to the bookstore to work the evening shift. But, of course, stupid hope has left you with the possibility that he might be at your house today.

Why? Well, your brother may have specifically told you not to come home because he was having friends over for the night. ‘Friends’ means him, and you don’t even know his name yet. You pray that whoever’s-up-there will grant you this in the least.

It had been a pain to get out of the grasp of your prying friends right after school ended, their bombarding questions of, “oh my god, who,” “you better show him to me tomorrow,” and “is he cute,” being too much for you to handle.

It was a blessing that Mrs. Lee had let you off for the day, half of your friends had cram school to occupy them, and the other half had classroom duties as punishment for getting caught drinking at the karaoke bar by the academy director (“I’m just sorry we got caught,” Miyeon had huffed, after trying to convince you that the cheap soju was worth it).

Now you can stay in your room and eavesdrop freely on your brother’s friends as much as you please, and you plan on doing just that.

Touching up your makeup as you lay on your bed, you wait patiently for the familiar rev of a motorcycle entering your house’s gate.

A ding interrupts your train of thought, your phone lighting up beside you.

[My Sol-bear 🫶🫶, 4:39PM] is he here yet

[You, 4:39PM] BRUH WHAT

[You, 4:39PM] HOW DIDYUO EVEN KNOW U PSYCHO

[My Sol-bear 🫶🫶, 4:39PM] ik everything bbg

[My Sol-bear 🫶🫶, 4:40PM] why else would the i-hate-being-at-home Na girly be at home huh

[You, 4:40PM] fuck u bro

[My Sol-bear 🫶🫶, 4:40PM] fuck me yourself

[You, 4:40PM] um bet

[My Sol-bear 🫶🫶, 4:42PM] no bc u better introduce urself to him or i will come over myself and MAKE YOU

[You, 4:42PM] that’s hot

[My Sol-bear 🫶🫶, 4:42PM] Y/N.

[My Sol-bear 🫶🫶, 4:43PM] i’m expecting a marriage date at approximately 8 pm so u better not let me down

Just when you’re about to type out a reply, you hear the familiar whirring of the gate opening before a small click of the front door. Sudden muffled chatter fills the house as you hear your brother enter with his posse in tow, their loud voices and continuous laughter ruining the silence that you had had the pleasure of keeping for exactly ten minutes. You’re pretty sure someone just got shoved against the wall too.

It’s only when they settle in the living room after a while that you decide to make your move, descending slowly down the staircase so as to not make any noise.

You decide to make your grand entrance when Jaemin conveniently gets up from the couch as he talks, heading to the open kitchen to get junk from the fridge. You’re surprised at the number of friends he has over, at least six pairs of eyes following his movements from the living room as he puts drink after drink onto the countertop.

You adjust your sweatpants to sit lower on your waist and fiddle with your top (and yes, you did wear it for your brother’s friend, it took everything to ignore the feminist in you to say you didn’t dress for that man) before moving nonchalantly into everyone’s view, an empty glass in hand that you most definitely did not prepare before-hand.

Jaemin looks up in confusion when his friends go silent, his eyes finally following their gazes to you. You?

“You,” your brother stares at you pointedly, “why are you here.”

You stare at him back.

“Um, why would I not be here? This is my house too, Jaemin. Remember? My name is Y/N. I have the same address as you. I’m your s-i-s-t-e-r,” you roll your eyes, moving to stand beside him at the fridge. He only ignores you in response, shoving you lightly and mumbling a ”move over, will you.”

“God Jaem, you didn’t tell me your sister was here. I would’ve brought flowers and shit,” Donghyuck flirts, moving away from the couch and towards the two of you. You give him a small smile before scanning the couch behind him, face dropping in disappointment when you don’t see your mystery boy.

Where is he?

Jaemin’s other friends, however, are looking at you in curiosity.

“So this is the hot sister,” one boy speaks up first as if coming to a revelation, “I’ve seen you around at school for sure.”

“What the fuck,” Jaemin hisses. “Never say that in front of me again.”

“Wait,” Renjun, who you know from your classes, his eyes perking up as he observes you. “You guys kinda do look alike, Jaem. I can’t believe I never noticed that the only other Na in our class looks like a carbon copy of you.”

You and your brother squint at each other.

“...I don’t see it,” Jaemin speaks up first, shrugging. “Anyway, we’re gonna game for a bit and then order chicken takeout. You want your usual, right?”

You nod and thank your brother before waving goodbye to the boys in your living room, their enthusiastic greetings and waves making your eyes crinkle.

However, just as you turn to go back up the stairs, you run face to face into the same hoodie-clad figure that walked into your shift just a few days ago. His eyes flick down to you as move back a bit, surprised by his sudden proximity. The two of you are so close that you can even smell his cologne, the citrus-y, cedar scent clouding your head.

“Oh Jeno, there you are,” Jaemin barely looks up as he walks over. “Was starting to think you got lost or something. Wouldn’t be surprised,” he mumbles the last part, smirking when Jeno shoots him a glare.

Jeno. I finally have a name to the face.

“Jenoo!” Donghyuck shouts, rushing over to where you stand in front of the said boy.

“You almost missed meeting Jaemin’s sister,” he says enthusiastically, linking his arm with yours before making you wave at Jeno. “The one he was so intent on hiding from us!”

Jeno looks away from his friend to meet your eyes once again, staring at you for what seems like minutes. It’s only after you glance away awkwardly that he mumbles a small “hmm” before making his way to where his friends are engaged in a (very) pointless argument about League. Your gaze follows him as he relaxes into the seat beside Renjun, arm thrown over the back of the couch like he’s in some sort of editorial magazine.

You almost die on the spot.

You also almost forget that Donghyuck is standing oh-so-conveniently next to you, and just happened to see that whole interaction play out. It’s only when you feel a nudge from the boy next to you that you snap out of your daze, just in time to catch Donghyuck’s knowing grin.

“So it’s loverboy, huh?” he teases as you elbow him back. He laughs before leaning down to whisper in your ear.

“Good luck with that one, Na.”

…

You groan into your hands as Sol outright laughs at your misfortune, her head shaking as if she’s just heard the funniest joke of the century.

“He just said ‘hmm’? Jesus Y/N, what did you do to this man,” she asks as you pout at her, the empty bookstore’s AC hum the only sound filling the silence.

You just shrug in response, upset with the fact that Jeno doesn’t have any interest in you in the first place. You could’ve liked any other one of Jaemin’s friends — who, by the way, were all very good-looking and much kinder than you expected for any relation to your brother — but no. You just had to choose the one whose first word to you wasn’t even a word.

You’re still in a mood about the whole thing when Sol gets up to leave for her evening job at a cat café, the dark rain clouds outside and humid air seeping into the shop doing nothing to help you.

After sulking a bit more, you decide to organize the shelves in the back of the store. It’s comfortable; the smell of wood and paper never fails to ease your constantly running thoughts, the soft glow from stained-glass lamps illuminating Mrs. Lee’s timely, leather love-seats situated between each mahogany shelf.

You go down each aisle, pushing spines back into their places and reordering by author name, slowly making your way into the dreaded romance section.

You start at the bottom, blowing dust away from the old books that struggle to be sold to everyday customers. As you make your way up, you notice a splotch of white at the very top shelf in the corner of the store. The darkness that surrounds the space makes the white gleam even brighter, a closer look revealing that it’s the pages of a book that are turned outward, not its spine.

“Wha-” you mumble as you squint at the book whose spine is turned inward. “What kind of idiot…” You trail off, slowly coming to the silent realization that there could only be one person who had wandered off into the shelves of romance this week (and reach that high up).

Jeno.

With a new determination, you grab the shop’s rolling ladder and slowly make your way up to the fabled book. You reach your arm out and snatch it from its place, blowing a thin layer of dust off its cover.

Your eyes scan over its cover: Pride and Prejudice. Pride and Prejudice?

You flip through the book in confusion, pondering why this novel specifically would be so important to him. You almost skip over the tiny splotch of writing on the inner cover, it’s messy handwriting easy to miss as you bring the book up to your face to read it.

[personal copy] 

“Is not general incivility the very essence of love.” 

Return to same place when done.

You turn the book around in your hands, confused at the words and wondering if it really is Jeno.

Making your way back to your place at the front of the store, you settle down and decide to read it anyway besides your hatred for the genre. With a warm mug of tea and small box of Pepero to keep you company, you find yourself drowning in the world of Jane Austin as the seconds turn to hours.

One exception can’t hurt.

…

You see Jeno in the cafeteria a week after you find the first book, the copy tucked neatly under your arm as you walk with Chaeyoung and Miyeon to your table. You can hear snippets of their conversation as you pass them, your friends giving you a look when they catch sight of Jeno (it was an unfortunate case of, “Y/N, if you don’t tell me which of these boys has you rushing home at the bell everyday I will pour bleach in your koi’s tank and won’t feel sorry about it,” that led to your entire friend group’s incessant teasing whenever Jeno simply breathed in your proximity).

You snap your head around when you hear Donghyuck’s voice above the others, his laugh bringing everyone’s attention to their table.

“Oh my god, Jeno’s reading a fucking romance book right now,” Donghyuck’s mouth drops open, genuinely concerned about the fact that his friend isn’t even the slightest embarrassed to be flipping through the pages of the thin novel. Jeno doesn’t even look up when your brother jokes that he didn’t know his best friend was “this soft.”

You clutch Pride and Prejudice a bit tighter in your arms as you move away from them, mind whirling as the possibility of the book in your hands being Jeno’s increases by the second. You’ve even been seeing him a lot more often at your house and on the weekends, even though he rarely leaves your brother’s gaming setup in the basement; but hey, the fact that he’s even there makes your heart want to drop out of your chest.

…

It’s a cool September afternoon when the next book comes to you, and its random appearance questions everything that you think you’ve figured out so far.

Mrs. Lee has left the bookstore to you once again, refusing to hire any other help for some odd reason; Jeno hasn’t come into the shop since the first time you saw him, so there’s no way he could’ve gotten it into the shop without you noticing — you swear that you have a sixth sense reserved solely for him.

So then how come there’s a book flipped inward smack dab in the middle of the romance section this time, its frayed pages standing out as you stand frozen in front of it?

You can’t help the nerves that bubble up in you as you pull it from off the shelf.

Its velvet cover is a mix of nectar and ambrosia, the sweet smell of sugar wafting across the shop as you bring the thick book to your spot at the front counter. Flipping the cover open, you’re surprised to see a familiar title: Norwegian Wood.

Humming in anticipation, you search through the text to find a certain hand-written message that could possibly serve as an explanation. It’s situated on the last page of the novel this time, the black ink bleeding delicately onto its yellowed page.

[personal copy] 

“‘Letters are just pieces of paper,’ I said. ‘Burn them, and what stays in your heart will stay; keep them, and what vanishes will vanish.’” 

Burn this book when you’re done with it, or return it here if you don’t; your decision would still speak ten-thousandfold to me.

You gape at the messy hangul’s intent, reading it over and over again before pulling out your own pen and making the split-second decision to write a little message back.

I disagree. Don’t you think you’re taking Murakami’s words a bit too literally here? Sure, sentimental value might always stay with the art’s viewer, but being able to keep personally meaningful pieces will forever be more valuable as a takeaway.

You cap your pen with a huff before slotting the novel back where you found it, its spine turned outwards for your own petty reasoning.

He doesn’t know what he’s talking about, you think to yourself.

…If it’s even Jeno… you add on, disappointed at your new development.

Now that he hasn’t even returned to the shop, could you have gotten the person’s identity wrong this whole time?

…

“Sol! That hurts ass,” you complain, tapping the girl’s thigh in succession as she attempts to curl your hair.

“Shush, babe. Beauty is pain,” she retorts, meeting your eyes through the mirror as she kneels behind you. Your room looks like a teen movie set, makeup sprawled across the floor around your criss-crossed figure as you hold up jewelry to your neck to choose from. “Chae, Miyeon, and Yuna are coming in ten mins to pick us up so if you mess up my masterpiece, I will actually end you.”

You get up from the floor slowly, changing into your going out fit before joining Sol at the floor length mirror.

“Oooh Y/N, we actually look so hot right now,” she exclaims, posing with you for fun before frowning. “Jungwoo better ask me out today at Johnny’s party.”

“He will, he will,” you reassure her, gathering up your purse. “He’s 100% in love with you, and even Jaemin can see it. He literally asked me if you two were a thing.”

Sol looks at you with wide eyes, the sheer excitement in them making you happy too. At least one of you is having luck in their love life.

“Wait, imma run to the bathroom real quick and then we can leave, okay? Can you tell them to wait out front?” Sol nods at you before returning to her phone as you slip into the dark hallway of your quiet house.

After washing your hands quickly, you open the door to a body running right into you, causing you to lose your balance and stumble into the wall.

“Shit,” a voice sounds out, two hands steadying you as you regain reality before your vision finally focuses on the boy in front of you, “you okay? You didn’t hit anything, right?”

You can only stare at Jeno, his concerned tone catching you off guard.

This is the first time he’s actually speaking to me.

“I- yeah. Yeah, I’m good. Are,” you stumble over your words, becoming acutely aware of the fact that his hands are still on your arm and waist, “are you hurt anywhere?”

He shakes his head before mumbling another apology, his deep voice being the only thing you can focus on.

“Jaem’s downstairs and we’re doing some project,” he rambles a bit, taking his hand off your arm to brush his hair back. You can’t help but feel disappointed at the lack of touch, but the shyness he’s displaying completely catches you off guard.

“You don’t have to explain yourself to me, Jeno. You practically live in our basement,” you reply, lips pulling up into a small smile. For the very first time, he smiles back at you.

“I’m sorry if I scared you, Y/N.”

And with a dozen more awkward apologies, you rush out to Yuna’s car five minutes late with a warm blush on your cheeks that hadn’t been there before.

…

By the time the third book appears, you’ve already anticipated it enough to clear your schedule for the afternoon. Determined to finish it as fast as possible, you bring the copy of 엄마를 부탁해 (Please Look After Mom) home with you to read on the comfort of your own house.

There’s a long letter written out in the front cover of the novel, it’s now familiar handwriting making you focus on their words and opinions that seem to know exactly how you think. You smile down at the phrases they use, the little references from the previous book appearing every so often.

Hours pass by as you emerge yourself in the world of So-Nyo, your pen scratching out every thought you have and every question that flickers through your mind. Your reply to their last message takes up both covers this time, your lips pursed as you focus intently on your writing.

With your headphones fit snugly around your head, you startle when Jaemin appears four inches from your face.

“Jesus Christ Jaem- what was the reason,” you push his face away, your line of sight just missing the fact that his best friend has just taken the seat next to you on the living room couch.

You startle a second time when a hand taps your shoulder, your eyes widening when you see Jeno offering you a glass of water from your side.

“You haven’t got up in a while,” he says softly, wrapping your fingers around the glass.

You’re surprised he’s even noticed, the sweet gesture catching Jaemin by surprise as well. Your brother looks between the two of you suspiciously, narrowing his eyes when he zeros in on Jeno staring at the book in your hands.

“That’s not weird at all…” he says, still put off by the foreign look on his best friend's face. “Anyway, you going to our party today? Sol told me that you guys were coming.”

You almost choke on your water, looking up at your brother in confusion.

“Me? She said that we- what?” You stumble over your words, surprised — you really shouldn’t be at this point — that she was going to yet another party for the second night in a row.

Your brother holds back laughter at your reaction, knowing Sol and her tendencies all too well by now.

“Uh huh, it’s at Jeno’s house this time,” he adds on as you turn your head to give a questioning look to said boy. He just shrugs, face nonchalant while Jaemin is visibly elated. “His parents literally left like six cases of beer in their cellar. What do you expect us to do, not make use of it?”

The look you give your brother has him sticking his tongue out at you, leaning over to tap your forehead.

Before you can reciprocate, Jeno hands you a thin pen, its silver plating glittering in the light. You look up at him in confusion.

“Yours is running out of ink,” he points out to you, referring to the pen laying in your open book. The last parts of your writing have faded, your mouth open in an “oh” as you realize that he’s right.

You think about your next action carefully.

“Jeno,” you say, leaning a little closer. He tenses at your voice saying his name, something he hopes you don’t process. “Thank you for noticing.”

That one line seems so much deeper than it does at surface level, the two of you sharing a moment of mutual understanding. You feel like you haven’t even had a proper conversation with this man, yet there’s definitely some sort of tension here that wasn’t there before.

Jeno gives you a small grin before getting up to follow Jaemin to the basement, his leather bomber on his shoulders and backpack in tow as he spends another one of his evenings in the Na household.

…

“No. Way,” you exclaim, dropping your bag and books on the ground of your foyer, Jaemin next to you doing the same as you both gape at the figure in front of you.

You rush forward as he opens his arms, your “Jaehyun!” ringing through the house as he pulls you into his chest. His familiar warmth relaxes you immediately, your arms still latched around his as Jaemin comes over to greet your older brother.

“Hyung! Why didn’t you tell us you were coming back from uni already,” Jaemin frowns, walking into the kitchen where your parents sit and watch their childrens’ reunion with adoration.

“Don’t be upset, Jaem,” Jaehyun ruffles his younger brother’s hair, “Yonsei had an early break so I wanted to surprise you guys before I go back to Seoul.”

Your twin lights up at the word Yonsei, his dream school triggering an immediate response as he begs Jaehyun for more details about his life at university. The conversation continues until dinner, the two of you elated to have him back home for even a little bit.

Jaehyun’s dimples make an appearance as you and Jaemin argue over who gets to sit with who for dinner, the latter huffing when you refuse to let go of Jaehyun’s arm.

Your older brother was like a lifeline when you were younger, always acting as a peacemaker whenever you fought with Jaemin or over-stressed yourself from school. Both of you look up to him so much, his kind nature and ability to get along with anybody acting as a guide for how to survive high school. The age gap of four years was never an issue for the three of you, and you got along as any normal siblings would with your own ups and downs.

You lean your head on Jaehyun’s shoulder after dinner, his presence alone comforting you greatly as Jaemin leaves to attend to the front door. You don’t even look up when you hear two new voices in the house, their footsteps getting louder as they reach where you and your older brother are.

Jaemin observes closely as Jeno and Donghyuck enter his living room, the former’s expression twitching in the slightest that he almost misses it completely.

It’s only when Jaehyun mumbles a confused, “why is he glaring at me,” that you accidentally meet the dark eyes of Jeno, who’s staring intently at your brother with a look you’ve never seen on him before.

Jaemin shakes his head with a smile, nudging Jeno in the process.

“Chill bro, that’s my older brother-”

“That’s Jaehyun? The Jaehyun?” Donghyuck interrupts with a sense of awe, situating himself next to your amused older brother before bombarding him with questions (you pretend you don’t hear the “how the hell did you hack the administrative office’s computer system? And find a way to get edibles through room check? You’re a fucking legend at school, you know,” from Donghyuck).

Jeno’s face visibly relaxes when he hears the name Jaehyun, tossing his bag next to his friends’ before making his way to the rest of you.

Was he… jealous?

You shake the thought from your head. No way.

Yet you can feel Jeno’s eyes on you as Donghyuck talks your brother’s ear off, while you refuse to meet his stare. You think you might combust, and your possible delusions certainly do nothing to help you.

A ding from your phone comes at the perfect time, the “We’ll break down your door if you don’t open it in five, four, three…” text from Chaeyoung giving you the excuse to jump up and drag your friends inside the house.

After your friends introduce themselves to Jaehyun — and raise their eyebrows at you after seeing the infamous Jeno on your living room couch — they take over your bedroom upstairs and trifle through your closet. You just let them, throwing your exhausted self onto your bed.

“We’re heading over to Jeno’s first, ‘kay?” Jaemin yells up the stairs. You shout an incoherent sound back, closing your eyes immediately after.

After an hour of fighting sleep while your friends get ready, they force you into a tight-fitting top and skirt and fuss over how many guys will definitely obsess over you tonight. You’re frankly after only one person, and his recent actions confuse you to the point that your brain hurts every time you think about him.

...

When you arrive at Jeno’s estate, the party’s already in full swing. You can see people stumble around in the front lawn, the heavy bass of music filling the entire block as Yuna links her arm with yours to pull you along to the entrance.

It’s crowded and hot as you enter, Sol being stolen along the way by her new boyfriend. The sound is deafening, with Johnny controlling the music in the corner and people all over each other, their figures spread throughout the Lee property. You don’t even see any of Jaemin’s friends, their tall statures no match for the sheer number of people there are.

“Holy shit,” you hear Miyeon say. “Did they invite the entirety of Korea or what?”

You finally get an answer after at least ten minutes of mingling around, when you finally see a truly familiar face. Donghyuck’s signature smirk appears in front of you and Yuna as you head towards the kitchen for drinks.

“Crazy right?” He laughs, the brown liquid in his solo cup sloshing around as he drags the two of you to the counter. “We weren’t expecting this many, but Jaehyun said that we should throw a big one if we’re gonna throw one at all.” You roll your eyes at your older brother’s classic antics; you can even imagine the exact tone of his voice as he relayed that to Donghyuck earlier in the day.

“Just big?” Yuna’s eyes go comically wide, turning around to survey the number of bodies in the kitchen alone. “Nah, this is like fucking Project X, Hyuck.”

His proud grin alone tells you everything you need to know.

You lose Donghyuck a few minutes later, his dark red hair hard to catch as he weaves between guests to seemingly greet them all. Yuna pours you her own concoction, your eyes following her movements with worry as she pours three times more parts soju to cider, the alcohol content making you dizzy already.

“I’m a lightweightt, Yuna,” you remind her.

“Y/N, just let loose tonight, hm? You never drink more than a few shots and this party is way too hype for you to not be drunk for it,” she sing-songs, pushing the drink towards you. “Bottoms up.”

With a weary look, you down the sweet mixture in one go and cringe as it leaves a bitter aftertaste.

Without even a moment to pause, you let your friend pull you towards another group of people from your school in the next room. The alcohol reaches your head fast, your face warming as you’re handed another shot from a classmate. Time goes by too fast for you to keep track, your motions blurry and eyes hazy as you get pulled along to new locations every few minutes.

The clock reads 1am, and two rounds of truth or dare, one game of paranoia, and another tense match of beer pong later is when you’re finally able to get away from all the activities. You take a seat by yourself on the staircase, leaning your head against the wood railing to stop it from pounding so much. Focusing on your breathing, you pray that the hangover that will greet you tomorrow morning will be a tame one.

“Need some company?” a sudden voice offers in front of you. You will your eyes to focus in the dim lights on the person’s face, but all you can hear is his heavy breathing as he leans closer to you. The smell of marijuana on his breath makes you lean back, uncomfortable at his advances.

“No, thank you,” you turn your head away, trying to show your disinterest as he places his hand on the stair next to you. The smoke from his breath rises in rings in front of him, fogging up your vision even more.

“Come on pretty, we’ll have fun,” he promises, moving too close as your personal bubble decreases by the second. He grabs your arm and tightens his grip around your wrist. “I know you want it-”

“Lay off, man,” a voice sounds out from behind you, a dark figure coming down the stairs to move between you and the stranger protectively. “She already said no.”

Jeno.

You don’t know what expression he’s given the man, but it sure is enough to make him back away. He gives Jeno a glare before reluctantly letting go of your arm.

Offering a hand out to you, you let Jeno support your weight as the two of you make your way up to the quiet third floor, the party still at its high downstairs. He helps you into a room at the end of the hall, and that’s when you realize it’s his room.

He seats the two of you on his bed before returning with a glass of water.

“Drink,” he orders softly, wanting you to sober up a bit before attempting to talk at all.

You sit in silence with him for a while, your quiet breaths and low hum of a record player spinning in the background being the only noise to fill the space as he watches you.

“I’m drunk,” you say to no one in particular after a long stretch of silence, your little frown making Jeno look at you in amusement.

“I’m glad you’re aware,” he deadpans. “Have more of this.”

You just look at the water in his hands, a weird sense of déja vu overcoming you as you recall a memory of this same exchange happening just a few weeks ago.

“Okay, dad,” you grumble, the sudden surge of liquid confidence showing that you already know you’ll regret in the morning. “You’re not my real dad.”

“At least you’re coherent enough to recognize that,” Jeno snorts, lifting an eyebrow as you finish the water anyway.

“I didn’t know you could use big words like that,” you mutter, getting distracted by drawing little designs on his bed comforter. “You only ever say like ten words max to me.”

Jeno’s eyes soften at your words, not even being able to reply before you change the subject.

“Why aren’t you down there with everyone else,” you ask, watching his freshly washed hair drop little rivulets of water onto his hoodie. They dampen the fabric, the little cross around his neck just barely visible underneath. “It’s your house.”

“Not really my thing,” he mumbles, relaxing on the bed next to you and leaning his head against the wall. You nod in understanding, mirroring his position before falling into a stagnant silence once again. Your eyes close on their own, a sudden fatigue overtaking your body. “You- you can rest here for a while, if you want. I’m just finishing a paper for class anyway,” he offers suddenly, turning to look at you.

“For real? One of Jaemin’s friends doing homework on a Friday night? I’m impressed, Jeno,” You yawn, tilting your head at him.

“For real.” His shy smile and averted gaze going unnoticed by you. “I’ll get a more comfy shirt for you from my mom’s closet,” he adds, making sure you’re okay by yourself before leaving you alone.

You take this chance to look around, your tired eyes scanning his room. His decor is unexpected, the dark and chic aura he usually carries not reflected at all in his personal space. The room is neat, a plethora of old film posters and polaroids lining the wall with his guitar hanging proudly next to his bed. Little letter blocks spell out the characters in Jeno’s name on his desk, the rest of the space being taken up by stationary and picture frames of his friends and family. There’s a record player a few feet away from you, the library of vinyls taking up the whole bottom shelf of his bookcase.

You gasp. The bookcase.

Your mouth opens in awe as your eyes scan the plethora of titles, with genres ranging from decade-old biographies to the fabled romance novels that your brother constantly teases him about. Model cars sit in a glass case at the top, right next to a stack of books that take up the width of the shelf.

Wait.

You squint your eyes to read the spines of those in the stack, your brain sobering up in seconds as you register what’s in front of you.

Pride and Prejudice. Norwegian Wood.엄마를 부탁해 (Please Look After Mom).

“No way,” you breathe out, leaning off the bed so you can make sure your eyes aren’t deceiving you.

“I’m back,” Jeno comes in suddenly, closing the door behind him. “my mom didn’t really have any shirts I thought you would like, so here’s mine instead. It was just washed like-”

He pauses, knowing something’s wrong when you don’t answer him. Looking up, he follows your gaze to the top of his bookshelf.

“You’re,” you swallow, getting up, “the one who- it was you?”

Jeno stops in his tracks, the forgotten shirt hanging limply from his arm as you make eye contact with each other.

He wants to deny it, say it wasn’t him who left little notes for you in the bookshop whenever he saw you feeling down, but he just can’t. He can’t do that to you.

With a sigh, he seats himself on the hardwood floor and just stares at the books in a contemplative silence.

“I think I knew who you were long before you ever noticed me,” Jeno finally confesses after a few minutes, the usually confident boy glancing out the window with a new sense of bashfulness.

Your heart beats faster at his words: Lee Jeno? Knew… me?

“I’d figured out that you were Jaemin’s sister long before he told us. He’d accidentally left his phone unlocked when I was over one afternoon last year; you and him are his lockscreen, you know,” he flicks his eyes over at you as you sink down to sit on the floor across from him, this new wave of information taking time to process in your brain. “To be honest, I started to notice you everywhere; at school, at the noraebang, even getting off of Jaem’s motorcycle one morning like a block away from the academy.”

You roll your eyes at the last part, Jeno’s added commentary of “why does he even do that,” causing you to nod your head fast in agreement.

“You gotta tell Jaemin that that whole ploy was completely pointless,” you say, shaking your head at just one example of your brother’s incredibly stupid ideas. Jeno laughs at your indignant expression, obviously familiar with said stupid ideas.

“And then,” Jeno continues, resting his arm just behind you against the bed frame, “you got that job at the bookstore downtown during the summer,” You smile subconsciously, just the thought of your second home filling you with warmth. “Mrs. Lee is my grandmother, you know.”

You turn to him incredulously, mouth open in shock.

“You’re kidding, Jeno,” you say, eyes wide as you stare at him. The gears in your head working at 100 kilos an hour, you finally understand the one thing that’s been living in the corner of your mind for the past few weeks. “So it was you who put the books there for me to find. You have the keys to the shop too, don’t you?”

Your questioning draws a sheepish grin out of the boy, and that’s when you realize that your conclusion is spot on.

“I couldn’t help it,” he continues, leaning closer to you. “I just couldn’t introduce myself to you in person when it actually came to doing it. And, on top of that, Jaemin would absolutely murder me. You’ve seen his reaction to Donghyuck’s flirting, and he’s not even serious half the time.”

He sighs, looking at his lap.

“Grandma says you’re the only reason why her shop is still open, and I just wanted to be able to communicate with you in the one way I know I can.”

You nod slowly, understanding Jeno more and more as he talks. Literature. He knows his way around literature.

“And then we actually met, and I really froze up that time,” he sighs, putting his fingers up to his temple in frustration. “I couldn’t even say anything to you.”

“Oh my god, Jeno,” you say, “was that what the ‘hmm’ was about when I first ran into you in our kitchen?” He nods, cheeks dusted with a faint blush. “That was truly a humbling experience, I literally told Sol about it and she laughed at me.”

Jeno groans in embarrassment as he throws his head against the bed, arm covering his face so he doesn’t have to relive that moment.

“You looked really pretty that night though, you know,” he mumbles through his arm, laughing when you bring your hands up to your face in mortification. He reaches out to gently take your hands away, his fingers circling lightly around your wrists. “It’s true.”

Jeno pauses just a few inches away from you, his gaze locked on yours as you both still in tandem. You could lean forward just a little and your noses would be touching. Before either one of you can move, however, the blaring sound of your phone’s screeching ringer goes off.

You can hear the huff of disappointment from Jeno as you pick up the call, putting the phone up to your ear.

“Y/N, where the fuck are you,” Sol’s voice shouts into the speaker. You can hear the bass of the party’s music blast through her side of the call, stifling her voice as she strains to listen for a response from your side. “Jungwoo’s gonna drive us home ‘cuz he’s a freak and somehow still sober.” You hear a faint “shut up, you know you love me,” in response.

“Give me two minutes and I’ll be down.”

You hang up the call quickly before turning your attention back to Jeno, who’s no longer beside you.

He stands in front of his bookshelf with his back facing you, thumbing through the novels on his shelf until he finds the one he’s looking for. He holds out the book for you to take, a bright expression on his face as he waits for your reaction.

“What’s this?” you ask, taking the novel between your hands and reading the cover.

Jeno makes you keep his copy of Agamemnon, your questioning eyes left unanswered as he pushes you out of his room with a smile.

“Tell me about it on Monday, yeah? Wanna hear your thoughts.”

…

Weirdly enough, it didn’t stop at just Agamemnon. Jeno started bringing you a book from his personal bookshelf every week, his excuses running along the lines of “I thought that you might like this” to a blatant “I wanted to see you.” Your heart still fluttered whenever you opened the front cover to a small, hand-written message from the boy, his intellectual fountain never running dry when it came to discussing his opinions with you.

Even Jaemin started noticing the shift in your relationship, smacking Jeno on the arm when he would accidentally die in their game from staring at your figure on the couch. He would make sure to visit your room before leaving for the evening, stopping for ten, twenty, thirty minutes more than expected.

And with time, it turned out that Jeno and you had more in common than you originally thought. Your love for music had you listening to his playlists later in the night than you’d like to admit, a playlist of yours dedicated specifically to his recommendations called J<3. You’d rather drop dead than let him see the sappy name though.

Your friends had noticed the change too, your occasional visits to your brother’s table in the cafeteria resulting in incessant teasing from your friends.

“100,000 won he’ll ask her out tomorrow,” Miyeon exclaims, putting her hand down on the caf table with determination.

“Nah girl, you’ve got it all wrong. 100,000 he’ll do it today,” Sol counters, a knowing look on her face as you hide behind your backpack in embarrassment. She may or may not have also run into Jeno buying a bouquet of flowers on the way to school, the said boy silencing her from blabbing with a tteokbokki bribe.

You secretly hope they’re onto something, the possibility consuming your thoughts as you push your way into the Lee bookshop for the afternoon.

What you didn’t expect to see was an untitled book sitting in the middle of your work space, its crimson binding setting apart from any other you’ve seen before. Before you can flip through it in curiosity, however, you notice a small catalog number pasted on its spine.

“Huh,” you mutter, “B612… B612…” you make your way down the shelves until you get to the B600s, placing you coincidently in the romance section of the store. “B610… here!”

You can feel the excitement bubbling up in you as you notice the slot where the book should be is already filled, an unfamiliar title greeting you. Pulling it from its place, you flip it open.

Giving a new meaning to romance. 

— J.

A small tap on your shoulder causes you to turn around in surprise, the familiar eye-smile of Lee Jeno meeting you face to face.

“Hey,” he whispers, taking the book from your hands. You let him move in closer, your back hitting the wall before he reaches up to tuck a piece of your hair behind your ear.

“Hi,” you smile up at him, the cold jewelry adorning his fingers clinking slightly as he rests a hand beside your waist.

“I was wondering if you’d like to go stargazing with me tonight,” he proposes, eyes flickering between yours as he awaits a response.

“I’d love to, Jeno,” you answer. “Definitely not the same stargazing where you have a bouquet of my favorite flowers ready, right?” you add on, a teasing lilt in your voice as Jeno’s face morphs into one of betrayal.

“Sol is pure evil,” he utters, eyes lost as you giggle at his expression.

He focuses back on you as the sound of your voice rings in his ears, the sight of your happy face leading his line of vision to your lips. You barely notice until he’s already a hair away, his warm breath shocking you back into reality. Jeno’s eyes meet yours, as if asking for silent permission.

You don’t know who leans in first, but it doesn’t matter when you feel his hands slip behind your waist and pull your body into his, slotting your lips together with a gentleness that takes you by surprise. Your arms come up to rest behind his neck as his mouth moves in sync with yours. You feel like you’ve been waiting for this moment for forever, the satisfaction of it finally happening driving your eagerness as you move impossibly closer to him.

Jeno tastes like candied citrus, sugar-tainted coffee and everything in between — he follows your movements easily, reciprocating with equal and innocent desire. His lips chase yours as you tilt your head for him, not stopping until you force yourself to take a breath.

He leans his forehead against yours, his touch soft as his hand brushes against your cheek lovingly. Pressing one last sweet kiss against your mouth, he reaches around you to grab the unnamed book that had led you here in the first place.

“For our story,” Jeno smiles, fitting the leather-bound into your arms.

Ours.

…

xoxo

2022 © kiachiako | all rights reserved.

[noname-friend]

"I wonder who I'm looking for" (Mark x Ex-Reader)

"Cause you don't go to parties." (College!AU)

Who would've known this would happen? Mark didn't expect it, his closest friends wouldn't have guessed. Not even you saw it coming. Yet here he was, sitting on the front porch instead of inside enjoying the party raging on inside. He watched every car pulling up or away as the amount of people seemed to keep steady.

Some said hi, Mark didn't acknowledge them as he sighed. When his phone 'beeped', he looked hopefully at it but it wasn't from you so he put it back in his pocket frustrated.

See, you promised Mark you'd meet him at this little event but that was before you got swamped with homework the week of. Mark's just some frat boy anyways, surely he's still having fun without you. Without you... Right. You didn't need to be there either way. Just because he made your heart flutter with the invitation doesn't mean anything would have changed. You weren't a partier like he was. This is fate, you stay home and study and he goes out and has fun. Exactly how it's always been.

Suddenly, your own phone began to ring. You tried to ignore it, you were so close to finishing this essay. But it kept ringing. You sighed in defeat and answered.

"Hello?"

"Y/N!" The other voice yelled over the music.

"Hm?" You responded.

"Don't tell me you stood my poor boy up tonight." You could hear the music get muffled, you assumed he was outside now.

"What are you talking about, Johnny?" You rolled your eyes. "I didn't stand anyone up. I just didn't accept the invitation."

"Mark's been waiting for you all night on the porch. He hasn't came inside once." Johnny said, disapprovingly.

You shook your head, "Don't lie to me. I know he's inside with his latest fling or with you and the boys taking shots."

"Mm. Nope." Johnny said simply, you phone buzzed.

Confused, you saw that Johnny sent a picture. Just like he said, Mark sat on the porch stairs, one hand holding up his head and looking out at the street.

"N-no way. He's not waiting for me. He's probably getting some fresh air." You tried to reason, guilt plaguing the pit of your stomach.

"I'm telling you man, he's waiting for y o u." Johnny emphasized. "Why aren't you here anyways? You even told me you'd come."

You ran a hand through your hair. "I'm finishing homework up. I forgot I had extra work before the end of the semester so there's no way I can come tonight- Listen Johnny, tell him I'm sorry and to go inside, it's too cold to be sitting like that."

"Wow. I just can't believe you sometimes, alright I got it." You could hear the eye roll but Johnny hung up none-the-less.

You sat, fiddling with your pen for a while, debating if you should go just to apologize or something. You looked at your books and papers piled up. Ruffling up your hair, you stood up. You grabbed a jacket, zipping it up and slipped some slippers on. You stood in front of the door, putting your hair up messily and used your leg to open the door.

Only, to be face-to-face with Mark. Shocked, you just starred for a moment.

"Did you- you didn't run over here, did you?" You finally said.

He leaned against your door way, his face blank but something about his eyes seemed... angry? Disappointed? Maybe even sad? "A simple text would've been nice."

"In my defense. I don't have your number." You looked away and nervously bit your lip. "And, how was I supposed to know you would wait for me this whole time?"

"I invited you because I wanted to hang out." He said in disbelief.

"Ok, I know. I'm sorry." You said simply, "You're right, I guess I could've asked around for your number but this was all last minute to me as well. I mean, now that I know I was going to go see you."

"Obviously." Mark walked past you, taking his shoes off by the door and sitting on the couch. He put a bag on the table next to your homework.

"What are you doing?" You asked, slowly closing the door and slipping your own shoes back off.

"Don't tell me you still don't want to hang out." Mark replied.

You blinked a few times. "You're going to watch me do my work?"

"No, we're going to eat, then I'm going to help you with this work." He pat the cushion beside him, and began taking food out of the bag.

You felt like this was some strange dream. "Ok..." You walked over and sat down. "Mark Lee, of all people, is going to help me with physics. Is this a joke?"

"Why not? I already passed." He shrugged, handing you some of the food.

You scratched the back of your neck. "Are you mad? Is confusing me how you show that you're mad?"

He shook his head no, taking a bite. "I asked you out, and that's all I want to do."

"You're so weird." You didn't know how else to put it and began laughing, causing him to laugh as well. "Fine, fine. Hang out we shall! There's no going back now."

"Cool."

"Cool."

[am1905pm]

Kesempatan Kedua yang Terakhir [Johnny Suh]

"untuk yang dipaksa berpisah, sebab katanya hidup bukan hanya soal cinta. tapi juga urusan perut dan trah yang patut selalu dijaga."

- Salazar dan Radea mungkin adalah kamu di sisi lainnya dunia. selamat membaca! -

***

Konser penutup kali ini benar-benar menguras tenaga gue bahkan sampai ke isi sel-selnya. Masih dengan pening di kepala, gue menatap wajah lelah teman-teman gue yang kini tidur di sofa pun di atas karpet.

"Party?" satu tanya gue membuat keempatnya menoleh dan membuka mata.

Si manusia yang paling diam di antara kami hanya menggeleng, "Gue skip, mau balik ke rumah."

"Gue juga nggak dulu, mau anter mantan," ucap si paling tampan yang gue bersumpah harus dapat perempuan paling cantik luar dalam di hidupnya.

Tawa gue menyela, "Mantan terussss!"

"Ya daripada elo Bang Sal, mantan nggak ada, pacar nggak punya, gosipan doang lo banyakin!" seruan dari si bungsu memancing gelak tawa yang lainnya.

Refleks gue berdiri dan mengambil sebotol beer yang ada di lemari pendingin. "Salah gue?"

"Iya, soalnya lo nggak pernah mau serius."

Teman-teman gue tuh beneran kompak kalau soal urusan sindir-menyindir seperti ini. Padahal kehidupan percintaan mereka juga nggak benar-benar amat, tapi yang selalu jadi bulan-bulanan selalu gue, hanya karena nama gue sering mampir di akun-akun gosip itu.

"Bukan gamau, belum nemu aja," kali ini gue berkata dengan penuh kejujuran, tapi sepertinya mereka masih menganggapnya gurauan. Karena tetap saja jawaban berikutnya yang mampir membuat gue tertawa kecut.

"Makanya dicari yang bener, jangan porta parti terus, Bang."

"Bawel deh bocil!"

Gue baru akan kembali duduk ketika manager kami masuk sambil mengipasi dirinya dengan kertas putih. "Sal, dicariin tuh sama orang di depan."

"Siapa?"

"Siapa deh namanya tadi."

"Lah siapa? Lagian tumben banget lo iya-iyain aja kalau ada yang nyariin gue. Wartawan?"

Gelengan kepala dia berikan sebagai jawaban, sembari matanya bergerak ke sana ke mari mengingat informasi yang gue juga nggak tahu apa. Ibu jari dan jari tengahnya kini kompak memberikan bunyi jentikan yang nyaring. "Radea!"

"Hah? Radea?"

Hanya ada satu Radea yang gue kenal semasa hidup. Dan gue rasa mustahil kalau orang itu yang dimaksud sama manusia berkacamata di depan gue ini. "Lo nggak salah?

"Kagak, lo pernah cerita sama nunjukin fotonya ke gue, 'kan? Orangnya tinggi, putih, cantik, ada tahi lalat di tengah keningnya, mirip kayak orang In—"

Gue nggak perlu lagi mendengar ucapan dan penjelasannya. Karena saat ini yang ada di otak gue hanya satu perintah yang meminta kaki gue lekas berlari mencarinya.

Radea gue, Radea Shalitta Tarigan.

***

Senyumku masih terpasang sempurna menyapa beberapa orang yang tengah sibuk merapikan barang-barang, usai perhelatan musik yang sangat amat sukses di malam ini. Senyumanku memang terpasang, tapi jujur saja debaran di dada tak henti membuatku berulang kali ingin ke kamar mandi.

"Dea?"

Suaranya. Suara itu masih sama seperti suara yang begitu kusukai dua tahun yang lalu. Aku menoleh dengan cepat, bahkan mungkin terlampau cepat. Senyumku merekah sempurna, mengabaikan semua bunyi drum yang bertalu di dada. "Sal, hai!"

Tatapannya masih setajam dulu. Ia melirikku dari ujung kaki sampai ujung kepala. Tatapan yang jika dihadiahkan dua tahun lalu selalu sukses membuatku seketika meminta ampun, karena aku bersedia berada dalam peluknya semalam suntuk.

"Kamu, kamu tadi nonton?"

Aku mengangguk tenang, walau sepertinya binar mataku terang memancarkan rasa senang. "Of course. Seneng banget lihat kamu udah sekeren ini sekarang.You did it! You prove it, Sal."

"I am," singkat jawabannya dengan rasa bangga yang menyelimuti. 

Aku tahu, dia pasti benar-benar begitu bangga atas semua pencapaian yang di awal-awal kariernya selalu diremehkan banyak pihak. Tidak terkecuali kedua orangtuaku. Yang sejak pertama berjumpa dengannya jelas sudah menolak cinta yang bagi kami tak lagi seumur jagung.

"Wanna go out for a while?" pertanyaannya membuatku tersadar jika tadi sempat ada hening yang semakin membuat canggung ini menguar. "Nggak enak banyak orang lalu lalang di sini," jelasnya lagi seraya menatap sekitar yang sejak tadi memang membuatnya kerap menarikku mendekat, karena orang-orang yang berjalan di antara kami tengah membawa barang-barang besar.

"Bukannya di luar jauh lebih nggak enak? Ada banyak fans kamu dan media, Sal."

Ia terkekeh. Aku berani bersumpah, gelak tawanya masih jadi candu yang sanggup membuat kupu-kupu di perutku ikut heboh dan bangun dari tidur lamanya. "Iya juga sih, bentar deh."

Ia melangkah sedikit menjauh dariku, dan mendekati pria berkacamata yang tadi sempat terkejut menatap kehadiranku yang meminta untuk bertemu dengan Sal. "Dea, sini! Ada ruangan yang bisa dipakai."

"Gapapa kalau aku masuk?"

Senyumnya merekah, kali ini tidak ada kecanggungan, bahkan seperti menyambutku untuk pulang. "It's okay, you're with me, yakali ada yang ngelarang."

Langkahku akhirnya mengikuti langkahnya yang panjang. Ia membawa kami ke salah satu ruangan yang kuperkirakan sempat dijadikan tempat mereka berhias, karena ada kaca-kaca besar dan juga box-box make-up yang sudah tersusun rapi.

Lagi-lagi kami terjebak di antara hening yang mungkin sanggup membuat dia mendengar debaran jantungku. Tapi Sal tidak pernah suka dengan hening, ia selalu tahu bagaimana cara untuk membuatku bersuara. "So, how's life,Dea?"

"Gitu-gitu aja," balasku tak berselera, karena memang hidupku tak lagi berwarna sejak kami memutuskan sudah. Aku lekas mengembalikan kesadaran ketika menatap isi dari tasku yang terbuka. "Eh ya, aku ke sini tuh sebenernya mau kasih kamu sesuatu. Kamu ganti nomor hape soalnya kata orang-orang."

"Oh ya, hape aku waktu itu hilang. Males juga ngurus nomornya, jadi sekalian ganti aja."

"Ini," tanganku terulur membawa kertas tebal berwarna maroon untuk sampai di tangannya.

Ia menyambut uluranku dengan tawa yang mengikuti, "Hahahaha. Ini undangan nikahmu?"

Aku menggeleng dengan cepat, "No. Kakakku. Itu ada namanya, Sal. Dibaca dulu makanya," bisa-bisanya dia bilang aku yang akan menikah, padahal aku saja masih tak sanggup mengenyahkan semua tentangnya dari benak bahkan jejaknya di seluruh tubuhku.

"Kamu masih aja nggak berubah, ya? Cepet banget ambil kesimpulan," biar saja, kali ini giliran aku yang menyindirnya hingga membuat tawanya yang tadi menghina, kini berganti kecut dan juga pias di wajah.

"Aku diundang? Orangtuamu gapapa?"

Anggukan yakinku ada untuk menjawab pertanyaannya. "Udah kubilang 'kan kalau kamu berhasil buktiin ke semua orang, bahwa kamu dan band-mu tuh nggak sekadar main-main doang."

Ting! Ting Ting Ting!

Bunyi-bunyi pesan mulai menghiasi percakapan kami, aku membaca pesan dan juga nama yang tertera di layar, lalu menghela sebal karena harus mengakhiri percakapan ini dengan cepat. "Hmm maaf aku gabisa lama-lama, Sal. Aku udah dijemput soalnya."

Binar matanya menampilkan keterkejutan yang aku masih coba terka; apakah karena ia enggan untuk lekas berpisah denganku, atau justru memang sudah menantinya sejak tadi. "Nggak mau aku anter aja?"

"No need, Sal.My fiancéudah sampai kok."

Ia yang masih duduk kini sontak berdiri, membuatku kembali harus mendongak menatapnya karena ia lebih tinggi lima belas sentimeter dariku. "Who, De?"

"Aku duluan ya, Sal. Jangan lupa dateng," pamitku, namun lekas dia cegah karena tangannya sudah lebih dulu melingkari pergelanganku. Yang jelas kali ini benar-benar membuatku harus susah payah menelan ludah, karena merindukannya dengan terlalu.

"Wait, I think you give me this invitation to make me your plus one. But turns out, it's a big no?Mau bercanda ya kamu?"

"Aku nggak pernah bercanda, Sal," jawabku seraya melepaskan genggamannya di pergelanganku, demi menjaga agar kewarasanku tetap ada dan tidak serta merta memeluk dan menciumnya karena rindu yang mendera.

Lekat aku menatapnya tanpa ada kedipan. Aku tak mau kehilangan satu detik momen pun untuk mengabadikan sosoknya dalam jangkauan, dan juga ingatan.

"Sal, kalau kamu inget dan seharusnya kamu tahu, aku nggak pernah ke mana-mana, kamu yang pergi ke mana-mana."

Dia diam, masih menatapku dengan tatapan yang kali ini sulit untuk kuartikan, karena terlalu banyak hal yang sepertinya juga ia pikirkan. Satu kali, satu kali sebelum aku benar-benar keluar dari ruangan yang sudah hampir menghabisi oksigenku ini, aku kembali mengulas senyum padanya.

"He just my fiancé, Sal. Be fast, if you still believe it's me,karena udah waktunya aku yang pergi kalau kamu juga terus-terusan pergi."

Satu pernyataan itu akhirnya kuucapkan, walau sebenarnya aku mati-matian menahan kelu yang seketika mampir setelah aku merangkai kata demi kata itu di telinganya.

Gennadios Armen Salazar.

'Untuk kali ini, bolehkah aku meminta tolong agar kamu mau perjuangkan aku, seperti kamu perjuangkan impianmu untuk bersinar di atas panggung? Karena sungguh, selepas pergimu, duniaku yang sudah hancur justru semakin berantakan.'

- FIN.

[haemilkis]

grocery shopping date

Pairing: husband!haechanxreader

Genre: fluff

Word Count: 1172 words (im sorry—it was supposed to be a drabble adjskl)

Warnings: none

Summary: You and your husband Haechan decided to go grocery shopping together and stumbled upon someone that made you want to ask whether you were ready to build a family.

It was a Sunday morning and both you and your husband Haechan were beat from last night’s impromptu karaoke session that went on till 4am since your husband just can’t stop serenading you his favourite Micheal Jacksons’ songs. It was definitely sweet of him to share his Spotify playlist(S) with you back when you were still his girlfriend. But not when you’re now his wife and would have to listen to his anthem Smooth Criminal at least thrice a day — but you also fell in love with him because of that. He really proposed to you to be his girlfriend through his Spotify playlist! 

As of right now, you’re just too madly in love with this man to deny anything from him. “hey, morning”, he muffles his words under the blanket and slowly stretches his arms around your waist. “so, what are you doing today?”, you said as you positioned your face in front of him and tugged the blanket he used to hide his face in. Haechan was smiling through the blanket as he playfully peeps at you through the blanket and stared at you face for a bit before answering you, “maybe we should go grocery shopping together today, what do you think, hm?”, you smiled playfully and nodded through the blanket that was once on Haechan’s head. You both knew that it was still a tad bit early to go now so you just cuddled together for another 10 mins or so you thought—it was actually an hour later when you both got up and got ready to go to the nearby supermarket to buy your groceries. 

As soon as you and your husband arrived at the supermarket it was packed with people and you were already thinking whether you should just go home—but you husband was adamant to still pick up the necessary items like milk, bread and chocoballs (Maltesers to be exact, his absolute favourite). So you just went in the automated glass door entrance of the Groceria whilst Haechan grabbed the trolley. Once you found the perishable food aisle you asked your husband if he wanted some more tofu and kimchi since he loved to cook kimchijiggae at least twice a week. “of course! yes yes” he cheered to you and with a smile he winked and you were a bit flustered because you can never get used to your husband’s love language (flirting with you 24/7 at the most random times). “alrighty haechan i get you now turn down a notch... there are people staring at us” haechan smirked and strolled the trolley to the bread section that was a few steps away.

Unbeknown to you, suddenly you felt someone tugging your maxi dress from behind. You were about to scream your husband’s name aloud because you were already internally screaming for a split second. You quickly turned around to see a very small figure with a height just above your knees tugging your dress tightly. The tiny baby girl had long hair in a ponytail and eyes were wet with tears. “Are you okay sweetheart? Where are your parents? Are you alright? don’t cry, okay let’s find mummy and daddy”, you bombarded her with questions since you were feeling flustered as the small figure’s crying didn’t stop.

Haechan saw you and was about to approach you but stopped his tracks as he saw your maternal side when you started to hug the child’s small figure to calm her. He felt weird. Not the bad kind of weird — rather, something in him was infatuated by the sight of you and him having a child together. To have his very own small family. He was lost in his own thoughts but quickly brought back to reality as the mother of the child in your hands scurried through the crowd to reach her crying baby girl. “I'm so sorry! Eun Hae tends to run off on her own sometimes whenever she gets a little too giddy but would also then cry when she loses her way to me” the mother rambles and sighs at the end as she tells you about her daughter. By this time your husband was beside you and also trying to entertain the small girl to ease her cries whilst the mother was explaining to you. Shortly after, the mother then thanked you again and left the both of you again now walking towards the freshly baked bread section of the Groceria.

You noticed that haechan was stealing looks at you. “um, is there something on my face?”, you quickly brushed your face with your fingers. He smiled  “no, you don’t” and briefly chuckled. Both of you went back to shopping for the groceries together speedily since the supermarket was now very packed. The queues were long and you both kept things minimal and bought only the absolute necessities ( yes, Maltesers included) and went to the self checkout counter to make your payment.

As soon as you were in the car and loaded the shopping bags in, haechan was still stealing looks at you. “Ok haechan tell me...what is on your mind?” You just knew that at this point he wasn’t trying to get your attention to flirt with you or any of his mischievous acts since he had “I have something to tell you” written all over his face. Haechan quickly adjusted his body to face you from the driver’s seat. “Okay so actually just now when you were calming the little girl from crying... i was— well I’ve been thinking about it for awhile now... do you think we should... you know... have our own little family?”, he said as he looked into your eyes earnestly. “I saw how you looked at the little girl and how you calmed her down...I just know that you will be able to be the best mother for our children” he continued. You, on the other hand, were feeling relieved and over the moon when your husband finally asked you this. You’ve always felt unsure on how to bring up this topic with him to discuss because it was always either you were both too busy with work or just unsure how to word it to you husband—mostly due to the latter.

You positioned yourself upright as you face your husband in the car with just the white noise of the wind blasting through the car’s air-conditioning chambers. “I- thank you haechan. Thank you and yes! yes I would love too”, you mumbled to him as you looked back at him at the verge of tears streaming down your peach tint cheeks.

You both hugged each other and savoured the moment into the embrace. “okay but let's go home first okay? or else your maltesers’ going to melt”, you said with a chuckle.

© HAEMILKIS, 2021

[atinyarmyzen]

１１：１１

༄ؘ ˑ inspired by kpopscapes holiday event

༄ؘ ˑ 12 . 11 » my soulmate found me 

pairing: jaehyun x reader

length: 1.4k

warnings: like one swear word

genre: tooth-rotting fluff, soulmate!au in which a tattoo of the timestamp of your soulmate meeting appears on your skin 

a/n: I saw this event and was super excited to see it was open to non-members, thank you for the opportunity! I love this idea- hope y’all enjoy!

The winter chill bit at his ears as he walked out of the warm restaurant and into the cold air. Jaehyun shivered and pulled his beanie down to cover them. He had just bid his friends a good night before walking to the crosswalk, waiting as he shrugged his shoulders up to shield his neck from the bitter cold. Still, the city was beautiful at this time of year, snow covered the ground in a white sheet, glittering lights flooded the streets in a warm glow, and people bustled about amidst the holiday rush. Just as the light turned and it was safe to cross, his thoughts were interrupted by a sharp pain on his forearm. He hissed and winced. Bystander’s cocked a brow at his sudden movements but quickly moved on as they passed him to the other side of the street.

“What the hell?” he spoke lowly to himself. He quickly pulled his sleeve up to inspect the source of the stinging sensation only to find four small numbers inked into his skin:

11:11

Jaehyun stared at the numbers with his mouth agape. Only a very small amount of the population actually got tattoos, and he never thought he would be one of them. He quickly shoved his sleeve back down his arm in a mix of panic and butterflies in this stomach. He looked around him and made eye contact with an old woman who seemed to have noticed his situation. She offered him a fond smile and said: “You’re lucky, young man. No everyone has a love like that in their lifetime,” before walking off. 

Jaehyun stayed glued to his spot for a few more moments, still processing what had just occurred. Finally snapping out of his shock, he continued his trek home. 

“Holy shit, bro. Congratulations, that’s amazing!” His roommate Mark gushed when he learned of Jaehyun’s tattoo. That’s when Jungwoo’s head suddenly poked out from around the corner. “Wait-what?” he ran over, “Is that what I think it is?!” Jungwoo hopped excitedly. “Yeah. I think so,” Jaehyun murmured  shyly, “Can you guys keep it down? I don’t need everyone making a big deal about it.” He said keeping his eyes downcast as he felt the tips of his ears burn, something that always happened when he was embarrassed. 

“It’s cool, we’ll keep it on the down low,” Mark comforted him. “You don’t seem at all excited though,” Jaehyun sighed. “I am- but I’m also not- ugh,” he paused feeling frustrated, “I was always afraid of this happening to me because I don’t think I can handle the stress, the constant anticipation of meeting this fated person just freaks me out,” Mark nodded and spoke after a moment. “I get it, that sounds nerve racking as hell, but you gotta remember this person is your soulmate-thats the beauty of it. There’s no need to worry about them not loving you back.” 

Mark’s words surprisingly soothed Jaehyun, sometimes his younger friend could be so wise beyond his years. “Thanks, Mark,” He said with a smile. 

Jaehyun stared at the ceiling from his bed for what felt like hours. He groaned and turned over at his racing thoughts and how they refuse to let him sleep. After hours of pacing, sorting through vinyls and playing random songs on the keyboard he finally felt his eyes growing heavy. He slumped down onto his bed with a loud exhale. He laid on his stomach with his head turned to the side on his pillow. He stared ahead at the wall before letting his eyes finally close. 

It was daylight, as far as he could tell, but time moved like everything was underwater. For some reason the cafe was bathed in a warm light, you could see the dust shimmering in the sunbeams that streamed through the glass walls. There was quite a number of people in there, he turned his head from where he stood to see someone sitting at a table in the far corner, typing away on a laptop. As if they could feel his stare, their eyes flicked up to meet Jaehyuns in a way that made his heart screech to a halt. 

He flew up to a sitting position in his bed, feeling jolted out of his sleep. It was light out, he turned to look at the clock and felt a chill run up his spine.

11:11 am 

Those eyes. Their image stayed so clearly in his mind. His dreams were usually never this vivid. His heart continued to pound in his chest, the fluttering feeling in his belly still lingered from locking eyes with the stranger- even if it was a dream. Jaehyun quickly snatched his phone from his nightstand and quickly searched for any info he could find on soulmates to ease his conscience. 

“....soulmate bonds vary by case. However, most soulmates have reported having frequent vivid dreams that intensify as the date of their meeting gets closer.” 

His heart leapt into his throat. How soon? Was the dream a glimpse into the future, or just his imagination? He regretted looking it up, it only made the feeling of anxiety intensify. Why was he so damn nervous? It’s not like he’s not used to getting attention from people, he’s had many people be interested in him before. Dating was never hard for him and he considered himself a pretty easygoing guy, but why was this making him feel so...exposed? 

Weeks went by and Jaehyun looked like he had just committed first-degree murder by the was he was constantly looking over his shoulder and fidgeting around. “Dude, calm down,” Johnny said as they sat in the cafe. Johnny was filming for his youtube channel and asked Jaehyun to come along with him for the day. “You’re making me nervous,” He said as Jaehyun restlessly bounced his leg. “I feel like I’m about to lose my sanity, man,” Jaehyun said, “I don’t know why this scares me so much.” 

Johnny was one of his closest friends, and also the only other person he knew with a soulmate tattoo. “The reason is scares you so much is because it feels different from anything else you have experienced with anyone else,” Johnny stated casually, “Your connection to them isn’t like any other- you feel extremely vulnerable feeling so imitate with them and you haven’t even met them yet.” 

Jaehyun took in Johnny’s words- he was right as usual. “Besides, you of all people barely let anyone in that mysterious head of yours,” He added with a sly smile. “Yeah, I guess you’re right,” Jaehyun admitted reluctantly with his arms crossed. “I know I am,” Johnny chided with his signature wink. Jaehyun rolled his eyes with an amused smile. 

“I gotta pee,” Jaehyun said standing up. Johnny hummed in acknowledgment as he stared at his phone. 

The keys clattered under your fingertips as you cranked out your last essay of the semester. You hated working in your dorm room because of your roommate, so you always came to this cafe around the corner. Your usual spot in the corner was cozy and closed off from the buzzing of the crowd. You reached for your coffee to take a sip and caught a glimpse of the numbers on your forearm. They had appeared almost a month ago and you had been having strange dreams ever since. All you could remember from them was a pair of eyes- they haunted you. You decided to shove the intrusive though away and go back to typing, only to be interrupted a few moments later by a strange chill running up your spine. You stopped mid-sentence and froze, it felt like you were being watched. Your eyes snapped up and the wind was snatched from your lungs. 

It was him. You recognized the eyes immediately, but you weren’t prepared from the rest. Slicked back, dark hair with a few strands that hung loosely over his eyes. His skin was like porcelain, not a flaw in sight. An oversized sweater that hung on his broad shoulders, with some jeans and a pair of black converse. Dear god, he was gorgeous. 

You couldn’t help grin like an idiot, it felt like you just got slapped silly. Then it hit you- you looked over at the clock on the wall, and the handsome stranger followed your gaze. 

11:11 am

You looked back at him to meet his eyes. Then he smiled, and his face changed from his intimidating beauty to the most adorable, dimpled smile you’d ever seen. He started towards you and every nerve in your body was screaming with nervous excitement. He stopped in front of your table and reached out his hand. 

“Hey, I’m Jaehyun,” he said reaching out his hand. “I’ve been looking for you.” 

“Took you long enough,” you joked, taking his hand. “I’m y/n.” 

[themishapsofafangirl]

Just Because [Johnny AU]

“Uncle! I already gave it to her!” The kid eagerly jumped to Johnny after doing the task he has the kid to do.

“Wow! That’s great! Now, would you want to have some ice cream?” Johnny smiled as the kid jumped in enthusiasm again after hearing about the treat.

Both were sitting by the patio eating a cone of ice cream on their own while watching kids and parents walk out of the gate of the school. I wasn’t packed like earlier so they could see each one going out.

“Uncle, why do you always ask me to give some cookies to my teacher?” the kid asked while licking his ice cream.

Johnny just smiled at the kid and wiped the ice cream off the kid’s face. “Just because,” he answered.

“You always answer me like that! I need another answer!” The kid pouted and acted sulky just because he couldn’t get the answer he wanted, which made Johnny giggle. The kid never fails to make him smile with its whines and antics.

“That’s because you would never understand,” he said to the kid so calmly.

The truth is, Johnny just couldn’t find the right words to explain why he is still doing these things. Why he bribes this kid ice cream just to give her the baked cookies he made and making sure she eats on time. He can’t explain why he is still waiting for her to come out of her work and makes sure she goes home safely. He can’t explain why he is still being concerned with her well-being when they have long been broken up.

“Ah! I know!” the kid shouted that made Johnny out of his trance. “You like her! Uncle! Do you like my teacher?” the kid asked all smiling, thinking he hit the jackpot.

“How could you say that I like her?” he asked the little one. “And who told you about that? You’re too young to know about those things.”

“Mama told me about it,” the younger smiled. “She said that when you like someone, you would do a lot of things for that person. That’s what you are doing to my teacher now.  Also, mama said that when you like someone, you can give half of your snack to that person. But uncle gives more than half to my teacher. So, you like her uncle. You should tell her!” The kid was shaking and pushing him to do it.

The older just laughed at the kid. “Did your mama also said that?” The kid just nodded and continued shaking his shoulders.

“I don’t need to tell her that, kiddo,” Johnny said as he patted the kid’s head to calm him down.

“But why?” the kid asked.

Johnny did not answer but looked in the direction of the gate across him. There goes the woman, he loves, walking so beautifully just like the day he first met her. When she lifted her face, beauty is just eminent in every angle of it. Johnny just melted when her lips lifted into a smile. The smile that bought light to his world. It was used to be his. Now, it belonged to someone else. And that’s why she doesn’t need to know that he still loves her.

"Just because." He said.

[angeliqueiguess]

Sending Haechan his predebut photos.

-----

masterlist.

[sweetheartyuta]

[2:53PM] - having a pamper day with Hendery on his day off with him sat in front of you as you massage his shoulders while he reads the instructions on the sheet masks you were both wearing. He’d turn ever so often to give you a kiss through the masks, sending you both into a fit of giggles.

[doy0gurt]

jaehyun guitarist bf au

- jaehyun has more of a cold, closed off vibe to him

- he’s a guitarist in a band he and his friends are in

- all of the girls are attracted to him, yet he rejects every and each one of them, not having interest in anything

- that is until his yuta brings one of his female friends with him so she could see the band, jaehyun immediately feels attracted to her, but he stays silent and acts cool all of a sudden lol

- y/n also happens to notice him, but they both tend to be reserved people and don’t talk to each other 

- y/n continues to keep coming to the band meetings, jaehyun tries to keep impressing her subtly, and no one knows that its working on her 

- yuta, jungwoo, johnny notice how jaehyun is being a tryhard and keep teasing him about it, jaehyun just says nothing and laughs it off and denies everything

- y/n develops underlying feelings for jaehyun, and shyly asks for his number

- jaehyun obviously gives her his number, and she goes home really excited him and texts him first thing <3

-  jaehyun, being the simp he is automatically texts back, and they continue to talk to each other every day and everyone else is getting a certain vibe from them oop  - everyone notices that jaehyun’s more open and outgoing when y/n is around, and its a very noticeable change as rumors spread around

- their feelings for each other only get stronger and stronger over the next month, and one day jaehyun asks to meet her at the back of the school

- y/n comes without question, seeing jaehyun there and walking to him quickly, asking him what he needs

- jaehyun shyly tells her that he needs to get something off his chest, rubbing his head

- y/n simply nods and lets him do what he wants, waiting for him

- jaehyun spills everything out to her immediately, about how he thinks she’s the most beautiful girl in the world,  how she lights up his life when he’s around her, and how everything about her is so perfect, yada yada

- y/n’s face is a beet red the entire time, waiting for him to finish to tell him how she feels 

- jaehyun asks what she thinks after he finishes, taking her hands inro his and squeezing them

- y/n just looks down and smiles to herself, telling him eventually that she feels the same, pecking jaehyun on the cheek suddenly 

- jaehyun chuckles and looks to the side, taking y/n’s hand and running with her

- happy ending yay <3

[kiachiako]

l.jeno recs

my library of favorites <3 all creds to authors

series

a lesson on style | @lucyandthepen​ — alternatively: an au tale involving lessons on popularity, eleven consecutive b minuses, a secretly sensitive, chess-loving jock, and an amateur sex tape.

misdial | @dojunie​ — YOU'VE ALL HEARD THIS STORY BEFORE. The brothers best friend, the little sister, the googly, starry-eyed crush for the one guy she can never have. In the movies, her years of emotional turmoil are always rewarded with the romance to end all romances— spur of the moment declarations of love, whirlwind 'i've loved you all along's... but for you, your crush on Lee Jeno more or less fizzled out like the aftershocks of a seltzer in milk. When you don't talk to someone for a few years that's bound to happen, you guess; it only makes sense that those feelings dissipated into nothing but an embarrassing memory the moment you grew up a little. But old habits apparently die pretty damn hard. And as you're about to learn, one accidental misdial is going to remind you just how long a first love can last.

a marriage of inconvenience | @choco-mark​ — when two mafia gangs decide to end their family feud after decades, your mother decides to give your hand away to marriage of their son, lee jeno. he seemed to hate you from the moment he laid his eyes on you, but could the resolution lead to something much more than a bride and groom?

into the wolves den | @dojunie​ — TWO BOYS. TWO UNIVERSITIES. TWO RIVALING TEAMS. And then there's you, stuck weightlessly in the middle of it.The time left on the clock is running out— and soon, you're going to have to pick a side.

[m] JOHNNY + JENO | switch | chain | @neopuppy — Johnny x female reader x Jeno, Jeno’s dad has got it going on AU, pwp, dc/nc, some angst, fluff

oneshots

[m] chippin’ in | @loeycity​​ 42.7k — Finding solace in bad decisions probably isn’t the best way to get over your cheating ex-boyfriend, but as you watch the strings of fate intertwine themselves with the four members of SAMURAI, you’re starting to think the universe is sending you a sign to do just that. A drummer with a sex addiction, an alcoholic with trust issues, a stoner who’s always high and the responsible leader who brings them all together – your mother taught you to never be greedy, but you can’t stop yourself from wanting all four. Question is, how bad do you they want you?

atlas cried | @cinnajun​ 24.7k — they say your soulmate is your perfect other half—whatever you lack, they have, and whatever they lack, you have. when lee jeno, your academy’s golden boy, approaches you and says you’re his soulmate, you can’t begin to understand how he—rich, gorgeous, never had to work a day in his life—could be the perfect match for you—poor, exhausted, and barely hanging onto the scholarship covering what would be a 65 million won tuition.

what if we stay | @neo-shitty​ 21.7k — fluff, angst, brief university!au, summer!au, friendship!au, band!au (drummer!hyuck, guitarist/bassist!jeno): one summer, two boys and a rollercoaster of emotions later.

[m] rose-colored glasses (all distorted) | pt. 2 | @neowinestainedress​ 18.3k — a long-lasting crush for her brother’s best friend, a bet, obsession, devotion and jealousy; all things that cannot lead to anything good. But the world that Jeno showed her was perfect and she couldn’t see what it really hid behind the rose-colored glasses. It was all distorted.

i wanna be okay | @mieohmy​ 18.1k — the one where your rich CEO dad hires you a mysterious bodyguard to stay by your side 24/7. on the contrary, as much as jeno tries to stay away from you- it’s just utterly impossible.

[m] summer hair = forever young | @setsugekka 18.1k — Only three weeks after being broken up with by your long time partner, you’re dragged along for your friends summer vacation plans despite your best attempts at staying home to do little more than feel sorry for yourself. Day one? Dinner and a movie. Day two? The bar down the street that smells like old socks. Day three? Well, that’s the waterpark, and the cute, blonde lifeguard that seems to make the lazy river his mainstay is a bit of a sight for sore eyes.

[m] yours to tame | @slightlymore​ 14.3k — You’ve been told the tale of your family your whole life: someone with royal blood will be the most dangerous person alive. It has been considered a funny joke until a bird got involved and suddenly you were relegated in your room with a bodyguard in front of your door.

[m] promises | @loeycity​​ 12.2k — When a system error at your new university’s residence leaves you to share a dorm with a hot male roommate, you find yourself in for more than just a sleepless night or two when you realize that he has a habit of walking around shirtless all the time.

[m] can i love you again? | @loeycity​ 12k — You’re happy to leave your college dorm to go home for the holidays and see your family, but you’re not expecting the extra seat at the dinner table when it comes in the form of the boy you crushed on all those years ago… your brother’s best friend, to be specific. To make matters worse, you shoved those feelings away and left them in the past, but will anything resurface the more time you spend with him?  

[m] fight club | @tyonfs 11.9k — after park jisung introduces you to his shady after-school activity, you realize it’s far too dangerous to be involved with the underground fight club in any way. their members are rough around the edges—except for lee jeno, who keeps you coming back for more.

the roommate contract | @jaeyunverse​ 11.3k — one-sided enemies to lovers, roommates au, brother’s best friend au, fake dating

our beloved youth | @yourstruleejn 10k — fate has a cruel way of bringing people in and out of one’s life. be it through weather changes, old memories or what seem to be mere coincidences. Jeno and you parted ways a long time ago, but destiny still has its say in who you end up with. 

[m] two photos, two kisses | @slightlymore​ 9.5k — a few too many shots gets you waking up in the party’s host bed - jeno lee. not only you slept in his room, but also his arms. and the fact that you’re both naked and you still have his lips’ taste lingering on your tongue doesn’t help the situation at all. 

love shot | @raibebe 8.6k — hockey player jeno feat. best friend jaemin, love letters

kill steal | @neo-shitty​ 8k — in which you find your name on the kill list of a notorious group of maniac killers and lee jeno is your only ticket out alive.

[m] the walls are thin | @springseasonie 7.4k — both Jaemin and Jeno have always had a thing for you and were never shy about it either. You always play hard to get, but all of your playing was going to catch up with you sooner or later.

clueless | @cozyjae 6.3k — loosely based on the movie clueless (no ex step siblings lol), enemies to lovers!au

everlong | @raibebe​ 6.1k — 90s grunge boy Jeno x female reader

i (have/had) a crush on you | @hannie-dul-set 5.8k — running into a past crush at your best friend’s birthday party wouldn’t have been so bad if he wasn’t— well— all that.

someone to stay | @jaeminhours 5.5k — Lee Jeno is the school heartthrob. He’s cute, he’s sweet, he’s handsome, and he’s single. But he’s not yours.

[m] that one night | @neochan​ 5.2k — drinking with your three favorite boys leads to a discussion that challenges you to find out who's the best at fucking.

it takes two | @loeycity​​ 3.6k — A party game gone wrong on New Year’s Eve starts to make you question just how much longer you can keeping loving Jeno if it means breaking your own heart to keep your best friend in your life.

for real love | pt 2 | @jungnoir​ 3.1k — Friends can kiss each other a little from time to time, right?

[m] thlut era | @neopuppy 3.0k —  nerd Jeno x female reader, crack, fluff, smut, Jeno uses retainer head gear

lee jeno x reader | @loeycity​ 1.7k — fluff, hockey!AU, university!AU

[noname-friend]

Why do you treat me so cold? Mafia!Yuta x Reader

Summary: You're just an assignment, why would you mean anything to the cold-hearted bodyguard? One more day, father promised it would only be that much longer.

(Trigger warning - guns, death, trauma)

For the past few months, you've been living within the walls of the bustling Ncity. It was all thanks to a deal your father made with NCT's leader, Taeyong. Some threats have come for your father and to ensure your safety, you are to stay with NCT until it all subsides. Taeyong takes the extra step to assign a specific member to stay by your side and let's just say, he wasn't the most enthused about being a 'babysitter'. You'd try to make small talk with him, but he doesn't seem to budge. It's like he's a statue whenever you look and try to read his face. You quickly learned to just give up. He's simply just a pair of eyes watching over your every move.

You received a letter from your father saying in a few days' time, you could come home. You smiled greatly, you missed home, as spectacular Ncity was, it wasn't where you belonged. You turned to Yuta who stood in the door frame, facing out.

"Yuta, I think you'll like this news from my father." You called out, and he turned his head slightly in your direction to show he was listening, "In a few days, I'll be out of your hair and home."

He sighed and nodded. You pouted at the response, but it was still better than when you first got here. When you couldn't even get a glance that was anything less than a killer stare.

You got up and tapped his shoulder, he moved out of the way. You went downstairs to the kitchen, and he followed.

"Are you hungry? I'm going to make some ramen." You turned to him, and he hesitated to answer before saying no. "I'll make you some anyways." You made 2 bowls and somehow when you weren't looking, he finished it quicker than you could blink.

"Do you want more? I could make some more." You offered, a little shocked.

"I'm fine." He paused. "Thanks."

Your face immediately brightened; he's never said that to you. "Of course, I'm a pretty good cook so just let me know if you want to eat."

He nodded.

"Yuta, Y/N." A member you came to know as Mark greeted the both of you. "Y/N, did you hear? Tomorrow there's going to be a lunch and we'll hand you back to your dad."

You quickly looked at Mark and smiled wide, "I didn't know it was so soon. I can't wait to see my family." You trailed off, gazing off imaging your father and mother greeting you back home.

You clean up and turn to Yuta, "Well since tomorrow's a big day, I'll go to sleep now. Goodnight Yuta."

He followed you to your room to double check the windows and lightly bowed as he closed the door. You laid in bed, starring at the ceiling. As comfy as this bed was, as nice as the room seemed, it never felt like yours. You were so happy to go home, you could barely calm your heart enough to go to sleep.

Apparently, you slept like a baby, because you were awoken by a knock at the door. It was Yuta making sure you were awake; you'd slept in a little.

"I'm up! Sorry! I'm- uh picking an outfit for lunch!" You called back, quickly jumping out of bed.

"We'll be leaving in a few hours, don't take too long." Yuta replied and it seemed like he went back downstairs.

You went through your draws, setting a few outfits on your bed. You crossed your arms and hummed. The outfit that called out to you was a white sun dress with brilliantly blue flowers, you paired it with some earrings to match and white flats. You looked in the mirror and fiddled with the necklace your father gave you and spun a little. Mother's favorite color was blue, she'll love this dress.

You walked downstairs to see a few other NCT members standing there in their own suits. They watched you walk over, and you smiled to them all.

"Thank you all for being so nice to me here, I almost feel bad for leaving. I didn't do much for you compared to what you've done for me and my family." You cupped your hands in front of you.

Johnny shook his hand, "Don't get all cheesy on us like that."

"Yeah, you've been a fresh breath of air in a house of kids that don't know how to bathe." Taeil added on, earning complaints from the others.

You laughed with them, and you all began to pill into the cars. In your car, Yuta sat beside you, Johnny drove and Haechan rode in the passenger's side. The drive there was light-hearted, you all joked and talked, even having a mini concert with Haechan. You realized that in a way, they did become like a second family after all this time.

The cars parked outside of a venue, and you could see your parents waiting outside for you. You couldn't wait, you jumped out of the car and began to run towards them. In your excitement you didn't hear the others yelling at you to stop and to come back. The last thing you could make out was Yuta's voice.

"Y/N! WATCH OUT!"

That was it, next thing you know you're on the ground. Yuta shielding your body with his. There was a loud bang. Then another, and another. Until it became a never-ending sound. You looked around terrified. Your parents were no longer standing, they laid on the ground and at first you couldn't process it, you couldn't process anything. You didn't respond. Yuta lifted you up and dragged you back to the safety of the car. There was gunfire all around you. You shook and Yuta kept your head down and covered as he yelled at Johnny to go.

The car drove and drove, the farther you got the harder reality hit you. Your parents... but you were supposed to go home... No this can't be happening. You couldn't help but cry. You cried and screamed, grasping desperately at the necklace. Johnny could only glance back at you and Haechan was trying to communicate with the others. Yuta slowly put his hand on your shoulder. You turned to him and held onto him tightly, burying your face in his chest and holding on desperately onto his jacket, as if he'd be gone next. And he just let you, he let you cry, and scream and he rubbed your back.

"It's going to be okay... don't worry... I'll protect you." He whispered softly to you.

You ended up back in Ncity territory, safely within the walls of the mansion. Yuta picked you up and carried you to your room. He tried to set you down and leave but you tightly held on.

"No! NO! Don't leave! You're going to get hurt! And- and" You pleaded between cries; you were hysterical.

He sat back down and cupped your face, "Y/N, Y/N look at me. Look, I'm right here. It's ok. You're ok. I need to see the situation; I'll be right back. Nothing will hurt you here, not as long as I am. Ok?"

You sniffled and nodded. He offered a smile before walking out. You could make out his voice along with the others that didn't go or made it back quickly.

"What happened?"

"We were ambushed. I'm afraid Mr. and Mrs. Y/L/N..."

"That means Y/N might have nowhere to go now."

"Where's the others?"

"Probably still caught up in the fire, don't worry we already sent back up."

"How's Y/N?"

"How do you think after all that?"

"Yuta you should stay by her side for a while longer, until we find out the exacts."

"Already ahead of you."

You hugged your pillow, tightly and continued to cry, silently this time. Your throat hurt, your head was pounding, and it felt like your heart exploded. The sounds of the guns echoed in your ears. You felt like you were spiraling when you felt a weight beside you. You looked over to see Yuta sat beside you. You both sat silently for a while, as you tried to wipe your tears away.

"I- I'm sorry... sorry for holding onto you and-and yelling." You sniffled.

"It's ok, I understand that there's a lot going through your head right now." Yuta sighed, "I'll be the shoulder you can lean on."

You leaned against him, taking great comfort in his presence more than ever. Despite the panic and fear electrifying through your body, his comforting presence seemed to soothe it a little. He continued to rub your back as you tried not to cry anymore.

"My parents..." You squeaked out, your voice cracking. "Where...?"

"I don't know yet. It's unclear right now but you'll be the first to know, don't worry." Yuta replied.

"Yuta... I'm scared. Please don't leave me..." You spoke barely above a whisper at this point.

"I won't, I'll always be by your side." He paused. "If the worst did happen, don't worry about that either. The family's here for you, all of us, I'll be here as long as you need me."

"Thanks... I- I really appreciate it." Your eyes teared up again and you let it go. It felt like your tears burned your face and the adrenaline in your body slowly faded, leaving you exhausted.

Yuta felt you fade off into sleep and he laid you down in bed. He didn't leave though, he sat with his back to you, facing the window as if he would keep watch all night. You reached out and held his hand tightly, to make sure he wouldn't disappear. He squeezed your hand as reassurance. And sure enough, Yuta did stay up watching over you all night.

[am1905pm]

Percaya dan Yakin Semestinya Berdampingan [Moon Taeil]

"untuk yang berjuang akan mimpinya seorang diri, bahkan tanpa dukungan dan tidak ditemani oleh mereka yang disebut paling dekat; orangtua." 

-  Pramudya adalah kamu di sisi lainnya dunia. selamat membaca! -

***

Mungkin ini sudah kali ke-sekian namaku diserukan. Dipuja oleh banyak mata dan diberi teriakan nyaring oleh suara-suara yang butuh penghiburan. Ini kali ke-sekian yang seharusnya menyenangkan dan juga membahagiakan. Nyatanya demikian, meski di beberapa kesempatan tidak selalu sampai ke relung.

Terlebih ketika lampu sudah dinyalakan, namun hingga di sudut terjauh pun tak kutemukan mereka letakkan tepuk, bahkan hanya untuk sekadar duduk.

"Udah siap?" suara itu mampir di telinga diiringi dengan tepukan halus di pundak, tepat setelah aku ubah pakaian yang penuh gemerlap, jadi kaus putih yang kembalikan aku selaiknya anak yang tengah teriakkan cita-cita paling mustahil.

"Siap nggak siap, tetep harus siap bukannya?"

"Pram Pram, nggak siapnya lo itu kapan sih? Gue serius penasaran. Udah salto bahkan ngapain juga itu suara masih aja sempurna, gimana caranya?" gelengan kepalanya membuat aku tertunduk berterima kasih, seolah pujian memang hal yang kerap ingin kudengar berulang-ulang.

Encore! Encore! Encore!

Seruan itu kembali mengisi gendang telingaku saat tanpa sengaja earphone kembali terlepas.

Satu hela napas mengalir lewat bibir yang sebentar lagi akan bubuhkan senyum, juga lagu paling terakhir, sebelum aku akhirnya kembali akan jadi si biasa yang tak pernah dibanggakan kedua orangtua.

Baru beberapa langkah aku menaiki tangga, setelah managerku mengusap punggung dan meyakinkan diri, sebuah teriakan menghentikan ketegangan yang sebetulnya menguasaiku diam-diam. "Mas Pram, tunggu!"

Aku menoleh. Rekah senyumnya membuatku meminta waktu sekejap agar yang lain biarkan ia mendekat. "Ada apa, Gendhis?"

"Aku bangga sama kamu! Mama Papaku juga bangga sama kamu, nanti aku teriak, 'aku tresna sama kamu' dari kerumunan penonton gapapa, ya?"

Binar matanya membuatku mau tak mau akhirnya menggelar tawa, "Boleh. Tapi emang nggak malu? Kamu emangnya di mana? Nggak gabung sama Mama Papa di VIP?"

"Enggak. Aku mau berdiri di dekat panggung aja. Aku mau teriak di tengah orang-orang, biar mereka tahu aku orang nomor satu yang sayang dan bangga sama kerja keras kamu hari ini."

"Hari ini aja?"

Ia daratkan satu kecupan di pipi kiriku seraya lirih berbisik, "Selamanya. Dari dulu sampai besok nanti akan selalu sayang dan bangga."

Belum sempat aku memberikan respon apa-apa, ia sudah lebih dulu berlari, usai membuat semua kembali tersenyum bahkan tertawa usai mendengarnya berteriak. "Nanti di tengah panggung jangan bengong lama-lama, keburu tirainya ditutup, kamu lupa masuk lagi."

Pagelaran kisah cinta kami usai sejenak setelah disaksikan mata-mata yang begitu paham akan keseharianku. Aku tersenyum, kali ini untuk diri agar melangkah yakin serta mantap menuju tengah, untuk kembali jadi pusat rotasi orang-orang walau sebentar.

Lampu-lampu dipadamkan. Denting musik yang mengalun menemani suara langkahku yang menghentikan semua teriak, hingga menyisakan deru napas yang bersahutan antar satu sama lain.

Pelan namun pasti, sinar-sinar itu mulai menyoroti aku yang sudah berdiri tepat pada poros panggung utama.

Selama beberapa menit pandanganku menyisir seluruh ruangan. Satu persatu insan di sana menyambutnya dengan sukacita, mengalirkan rasa percaya bahwa aku tidak pernah salah memilih dan memihak. Hingga akhirnya kedua netraku temui binar paling terang milik Gendhis, juga empat bola mata yang kupastikan tengah doakan kesuksesanku malam ini.

Doa dari mereka yang tidak membesarkan tapi beri kepercayaan dengan penuh. Yang nyatanya tak pernah kudapatkan dari dua sosok yang tak pernah sudi injakkan kakinya di tempat aku merasa hidup dan juga cukup.

Malam ini berbeda, lagu terakhir kali ini aku persembahkan untuk keduanya. Yang mungkin masih selipkan doa di antara sujudnya. Yang mungkin masih harapkan aku pulang di tiap pagi harapan kembali dilangitkan.

'Mas sudah sudah buktikan, Bu. Mas sudah buktikan kalau ini hidup yang akan selalu mau untuk Mas jalani, bahkan sampai nanti tua. Meski mungkin Ibu dan Ayah masih belum juga mau untuk percaya, tapi Mas akan selalu beri percaya dan yakin pada diri. Maaf tidak bisa jadi anak yang tunduk dan patuh pada pinta. Tapi malam ini Mas buktikan, jika percaya dan dukungan semestinya jadi milik yang katanya tercinta.' 

- FIN.

[nct-perrie]

Perrie’s Dating History

❈Dating Overview ❈  ― Perrie never really had a hard time admitting she could have feelings for both genders. Luckily, she came from a very accepting home, so she never really felt nervous about telling them. Growing up, she had crushes on both men and women but she never drew any attention towards gender and she realized that she would be open to date anyone regardless of what they identify as. However, being in a relationship is very complicated for her because she knows she can be a lot to handle and not everyone will be comfortable with the way she acts - which she completely understands. So, she is usually very scared to get in relationships because she hates getting close to someone and then them leaving because her personality was too much or to hard to understand. 

𝓚𝓲𝓶 𝓙𝓲𝓷 𝓐𝓮

Duration: May 2017 - April 2018

Reason for break up: Perrie had to go home for personal reasons, so she broke up with Jin Ae because a relationship was too much for her. 

Current Status: They’re supportive of each other and would still consider one another friends. 

Song about relationship: Can We Just Be Happy Now by Jake Scott and Josie Dunne

Kim Jin Ae was born December 5, 1998 and she was under SM as a model trainee. The two of them met a few times when Perrie was a trainee and they kept in contact. As the years went by the developed a close friendship. In 2017, Perrie was having a really hard time and Jin Ae was the one she would lean on because she did not want to worry her members - or make them more worried than they already were. As a result, the two ended up admitting their feelings for one another. 

Their relationship was a prime example of puppy love or first loves. Neither of them ever dated anyone so everything was a learning curve. For Perrie, she had a hard time at the beginning of the relationship because of her BPD, it caused a lot of inner and outer turmoil, that wasn’t exactly healthy. However, Perrie did not realize that until years later. Jin Ae knew Perrie had a personality disorder and that not everything she did was on purpose so she tried to remind herself that in order to lessen whenever Perrie hurt her feelings accidently. 

Perrie kept this relationship a secret - even from the members - not because she was embarrassed, but because she felt much more comfortable with knowing that the relationship was just between the two of them. However, her members found out through the Dreamies who found out secretly which also ended up with Perrie getting upset and disappointed at them for a while. 

Overall, despite the few problems, they both would say that they don’t regret the relationship. They acted the way they both believe people in love would act. After they met up after their breakup and Perrie came back to SM, they thought about trying it again, but Perrie soon realized that a relationship would not be good for her during that time. 

𝓘𝓶 𝓒𝓱𝓪𝓷𝓰𝓴𝔂𝓾𝓷

Duration: April 2019 - February 2020

Reason for break up: The relationship wasn’t the best. It wasn’t exactly toxic but the both of them were too different and wanted different things inside the relationship. 

Current Status: Supportive but awkward. There are no negative feelings because both recognize they made mistakes. 

Song of the relationship: Arms around you by Jamie Grey

Perrie met Changkyun in early 2019 because she actually took part in his Horizon mixtape. While preparing, the two spent quite some time together and they both really enjoyed being around each other. It was a few months later that Changkyun asked her out. Perrie was hesitant at first because she was nervous that he would leave after they got closer together. It wasn’t until she talked to some of her members, who convinced her to go on at least one date and see. 

The first few months of the relationship were very easy. After the first few dates and after confirming that they are in a relationship, they both got really busy. Therefore, Perrie could hide her more negative traits of when her BPD was acting up more than usual. However, since they were getting more comfortable with one another, they unintentionally did things that hurt the other. 

Changkyun was someone who liked his alone time and liked the push-and-pull game. While the rational part of Perrie could understand him needing his own time, the other part of her got insecure and scared. The whole push-and-pull game he did, while he truly meant no harm, made it worse for Perrie. However, Perrie also caused some problems, she wasn’t as open with him and tended to get very sharp and unintentionally say some things rude when he pushed a bit to far. This all led up to a very big fight where both said some insensitive words. They managed to get over it, but the fight was lingering in both of their minds. 

The following few months they dated, it went from being very sweet and cute to a lot of tensions and toxicity. Perrie ended up feeling stressed whenever they got together and couldn’t wait until she got home. There were many nights where she was second guessing herself and crying. The two did not exactly get together to call it off, the both just knew that this was not a good relationship. There was still tension but they ended up getting past it when he called her when he learned she was in the hospital. He still cared a lot about her and worried about her so he felt like he needed to call. This call smoothened a lot of things out for them and eased any negative feelings they might have harbored. 

In this relationship, Perrie learned a lot, she got hurt a lot, there was a lot of drama and damage, but despite all this it taught her a lot. She learned what she needed in a relationship and what she needed to work on. She knew she had stuff she needed to work on and this relationship pointed it out. Overall, it taught her lessons about love and made her stronger for the future.