#MyMediation

[tinky-isabel]

Surfing through life

Lately during my meditations, I was surfing on this huge river at tremendous speed. It all started a few weeks before Tinky passed away, I realised a few days ago. At first I was near this very high waterfall and I had to decide what direction I wanted to go. I decided to follow the stream, turned right and I was on this very wide river. By that time Tinky had passed away. 

I was apparently on some surfboard and I could feel Tinky’s presence. As if she looked over my shoulder. And in the background I felt other ‘people’, souls, cheering me on. I surfed faster and faster and I loved it! I didn’t touch the water anymore, I flew over the water! And I love flying! It didn’t scare me one bit. After a while I started wondering: was this the intention? And I slowed down. I had time to look around. There were so many people, behind me, on the shore left and right - all cheering me on. And Tinky was still there too.  It was a huge river.

But I could also see that I was heading for a waterfall. The water just seem to stop flowing forward, but just fell into this depth of ‘nothing’...

[keys2thefalcon]

Does my future look bright?

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[tinky-isabel]

Now what?

And then I saw opposite the waterfall a huge rocky wall, and little houses were built against it. They were ‘hanging’ on the wall, a bit shabby, and people were obviously living in them. And I could feel they were unhappy, quarreling. It made me anxious: do I have to go there? Is that my path? Again? It would also mean I had to go down - again. It would be a deep fall. I felt reluctant. 

But then I looked up! The sky was blue and sunny. And I could see over the rocky wall it was a smooth surface. And off the coast there were these little islands, floating in the air. And in the distance I could see this big island and I could feel that was my destination. That’s where I’going! And it felt so good! 

But in the mean time, I had to make a choice ... The hard way, meaning going down to help people who need help. Or the easier way that would make me happy. It felt like having to choose between others and myself. It took me quite a while, going down a bit, coming up again. Do I do what I feel I ‘must’ do? Or do I choose my own happiness? It may seem silly, but it was a difficult choice.

And then it dawned on me: I’m not selfish for choosing myself. I’m important too. I’m entitled to be happy. And what may seem easy, may turn out not being so easy. I don’t know yet! I flew straight to the other side, to the coast on my way to the first floating island. 

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