#My man just grocery shopping till he somehow ended up her lmao

[xandyprojects]

Imagine you were grocery shopping till somewhat you ended up here by your egg.

"It's your turn now! Go on! Put on a show!" -Gilbert

“?!?”

Collab template and Gilbert belongs to: @idkhowtoname

Scriver Wright (Timekeeper) and Eegarator (Egg!Narrator) are mine!

[+Bonus panels]

“aren’t you gonna say some- hey are you alright?” Gilbert turned to the strawberry person as they only respond with silence

The crowd was silent to..

“I want to go home!” They yelp.

[dontdowhatisayandnobodygetshurt]

This is how the first time Dante, Jesse and Vrox hooked up went down.

I’m actually quite proud of this, especially the texts lmao XD but this still porn soooo... yeah, you can read up till things start getting sPiCY, or you can choose not to read it at all, no problem my beans!!! <3

Disagreements were commonplace, though they were rarely serious. Which song was better, who had cheated in a video game, whose turn it was to do the grocery shopping, whose puppy eyes while trying to guilt the other into doing the grocery shopping were cuter... There was one thing both Jesse and Vrox agreed on, and that was that Dante was hot.

He was also currently standing in their apartment making waffles, a fact which Jesse was texting Vrox.

Dante’s making waffles.

In out apartment.

Right now.

fuck me. the one day i’m doing the shopping

fuck.

Next time I’ll come with. We’ll steal some Cap’n Crunch.

bullshit we will. the one time i tried to lift something you kicked my ass. almost got us fucking arrested.

teacher’s pet.

If you met my mom you’d understand.

i haven’t met her and i still understand. you’re you. you’re a shitty demon jess.

SO shitty.

Dante’s still making waffles.

don’t change the subject

mr shitty demon.

He doesn’t have a shirt on.

okay i’m distracted.

send pics

Jesse laughed under his breath, sent an ‘x’ through, and slipped his phone back into his pocket.

“Something funny?” Dante asked, looking over his shoulder. Jesse hadn’t been lying about the lack of shirt; Dante had taken it off to wipe the sweat off his face, then left it in their laundry basket. He cut a damn fine figure and Jesse was trying his best to keep his eyes where they belonged. It didn’t help that they’d just gotten back from training, where Dante’s hands had been all over him, or that Jesse was getting better with staying on his feet and Dante had praised him for it, or that he had insisted on coming home with him because Vrox wasn’t there and he “looked lonely.”

Jesse’s phone decided to start pinging mercilessly and he could feel his face growing hotter and hotter as Dante’s gaze flicked down to his pants, eyebrows raised.

“Uh,” was all Dante could get out before Jesse pulled the phone back out and read the texts.

JESSE don’t you DARE

you’re not a shitty demon i changed my mind

you’re fucking awful. this is TORTUrE.

i’m coming home don’t do anything without me

you better not be doing anything without me

i swear to father

i will kill you

i mean i won’t cos you’re my sunshine and shit

you get the fucking point

Jesse smirked.

Oh yeah, I get the

FUCKING

point

yeah

yeah

yeah i’m gonna kill you.

“It’s just Vrox,” Jesse said, pressing the volume down to zero and dropping the phone on the table. “He’s being a baby.”

“Right.” Dante didn’t look convinced. In fact, Jesse had a hunch that he knew what was going on and had since this whole thing started. It wouldn’t surprise Jesse if he knew exactly what he was getting into when he first brought up the idea of private lessons with Jesse - and Vrox’s protective ass by extension. It was probably mostly because Jesse sucked ass at fighting and needed one-on-one teaching, but also...

“I thought your mom was big on being polite,” Dante said, eyes back on his waffles. He’d already eaten four. The rest were doomed. “Didn’t she tell you staring is rude?”

“Um.” Jesse cleared his throat as flames rushed into his face again. “Yeah. She did.”

He felt like a freaking teenager again. Well, technically he was still a teenager, but-

“It’s alright,” Dante said. He walked over, set a plate stacked with golden deliciousness in front of Jesse. There’s was something in his eyes, half a dangerous-looking gleam and half a goodnatured twinkle. “I don’t mind.”

It took Jesse a whole few seconds to realize his mouth was still open and he shut it with a little clop. His face had to have been bursting into flames at this point, right?

“Eat up,” Dante said with a nod to the plate and a frown. “You’re too damn thin. Every time I put a hand on you all I feel is bone.”

Well. The joke was right there. Vrox would have taken it. Jesse wasn’t that brave.

“Thanks,” he said instead, silently cursing himself as Dante just turned around and went back to making waffles. Hell, how many did he need? A lot. It took a lot to make him look like that. Maybe Jesse really should eat more-

“Hey,” Vrox said as he hurried into the room as fast as he could without looking like he was hurrying. He shot a glare worthy of a demon in Jesse’s direction, which was responded to with a sweet smile, and dropped the bags on the counter. All in one trip, Vrox wasn’t one to do things by halves. One of the bags had bunnies printed on it. Jesse knew it was Vrox’s favourite, even if he wouldn’t admit it on death row.

“What’re you doing here?” was directed at Dante. Jesse sighed; Vrox sounded standoffish even at the best of times.

“I like Jesse,” Dante said simply, flipping another waffle onto the growing mountain. “He’s a calming presence.” The emphasis on he wasn’t lost on either of them. Jesse smiled into his next bite of waffle and, well, Vrox...

“The fuck does that mean?” But Jesse could tell by the tone shift in his boyfriend’s voice that he agreed. It made warmth flutter in his stomach, tweaked his lips into a wider smile.

That smile dropped within a second though as Dante turned very causally to look Vrox in the face and said, “It means are you going to shut up, or do I have to make you?”

Vrox blinked once, twice, stunned. For a second, the only sound was Jesse choking on his waffle at the table.

“Please,” Dante said with a smile. “You really think I wouldn’t notice? I’ve heard bombs more subtle than you two.”

“We - don’t-”

“Jerk off in the gym before you think I get there? No point in lying, because I know you do.”

Jesse almost choked again, on his own spit this time.

Vrox, on the other hand, seemed to have recovered. “What’re you gonna do about it, then?”

It was a challenge, plain and simple. Jesse’s eyes flicked back and forth between them, and he couldn’t deny that there was a wet spot on his briefs already.

“Like I said,” Dante replied, voice so steady despite the smile - no, the grin, a feral sort of grin that twisted in the pit of Jesse’s stomach - present on his face. “If you’re not going to shut up, I’m gonna make you.”

Vrox’s eyes flicked over his shoulder, met Jesse’s for one second. The question was so clear on his face - is this okay? do you want me to do this? - and it breathed love back through Jesse’s veins. Jesse gave an almost imperceptible nod, and a cocky grin of Vrox’s own appeared on his face as he stepped forward, getting right up in Dante’s face.

“Then make me,” he growled, low in his chest.

Dante moved faster almost than Jesse’s eyes could follow. His hand reached up to grab the front of Vrox’s bomber jacket - gentler than maybe it should have been, because of course he hadn’t missed that soft little questioning glance, of course he hadn’t - twisted his body into him and slammed him up against the fridge so hard it rocked.

And then he was kissing him, fierce and deep, and shit, if Jesse hadn’t been wet before, he was now.

Vrox melted into the kiss, pushed up against him like he couldn’t get him close enough fast enough, hands clawing at his hips. Jesse watched the red marks they left in the olive skin there and swallowed hard. He wasn’t jealous, but man what he wouldn’t give to be the receiving end of the obviously very talented assault of Dante’s mouth.

Vrox must have picked up on that, because he growled low in his chest and pushed back. “Bedroom,” he got out, voice husky in the way Jesse liked it. His eyes took in Dante’s face, then slid back over his shoulder to Jesse’s. Dante turned, too, gaze running over Jesse like a heavy weight. His dark eyes looked even darker than usual, but the smile he gave Jesse was somehow terrifying and kind at the same time.

“Sounds like a plan,” he said. He reached out with one big hand, not even bothering to turn off the outlet, just ripped the waffle iron’s cord straight out of it. Then took three strides and swept Jesse off his feet like he didn’t weigh more than a grocery bag.

The breath huffed out of Jesse - he didn’t get a chance to get it back before Dante’s mouth sealed over his.

Fuck. His tongue flicked against Jesse’s lower lip, teasing more than asking for access, ignoring the immediate part of Jesse’s lips for a tortuously long moment. One hand locked Jesse’s legs around his waist - low, so low Jesse could feel him pressed right up against him, fuck - and the other slid red-hot up Jesse’s back. Jesse felt another set of hands on him, slipping up under his shirt with practiced ease, just as Dante’s tongue met his own.

He couldn’t help it; he moaned right into Dante’s mouth, feeling Vrox’s hands trace down his spine.

Dante broke the kiss with a laugh. “Should’ve known you were this sensitive.”

“Ha, just you wait till you get at Vrox’s neck,” Jesse said. His voice didn’t sound weak. Not at all. Not in the slightest.

“Traitor,” Vrox muttered in his ear, pressed a kiss just under it.

Dante dropped Jesse on the bed with little ceremony and instantly started stripping, leaving Jesse and Vrox to scramble after his example. Jesse kind of wished he’d stopped to savor the show, however: Dante’s movements were clean, perfect efficient, almost had a certain grace to them. Vrox was all red-blooded, one misjudged pull away from ripping the fabric right off his body. And Jesse just tried to keep up, dragging off his shirt with a bit of difficulty and kicking his way out of his jeans. Damn skinny jeans, he should really stop wearing them, they were a pain in the-

He stopped as he saw Dante lean down, his leg slotted between Jesse’s thighs and one hand braced on the mattress. Hovering over him, the fingers of his free hand hovering just above Jesse’s chest.

“Can I touch you here?” he asked quietly.

Oh. Right. His scars.

Past Dante’s head, Jesse could see Vrox watching them like a hawk, and he knew without shadow of a doubt that if he said no and Dante still tried, Vrox would put him through a window.

God, he loved him. He really, really loved him. But he also trusted Dante, he wouldn’t have wanted this if he didn’t trust him.

“Yeah,” he said, licking his lips. “You can- you can touch me anywhere. Everywhere. Please.”

Dante grinned and ran his thumb along the faded lines in Jesse’s skin, and then just under them, where the sensitivity still lingered. Jesse sighed and Dante kissed him to taste the sound, pressing a little harder down on a sensitive spot, ever the quick learner.

“’Please’?” Vrox said incredulously. Jesse snickered into the kiss, not sparing him a glance until he thumped onto the bed beside him. “’Please’? What the fuck?”

“Just ‘cause I normally make you beg doesn’t mean I don’t know how to,” Jesse breathed out.

“Oh, shut your fucking face, Jesse, I- hhn.”

Dante had reached out and grabbed his cock - already hard and wet-tipped. Even though his body language was light, Dante’s grip was firm and the technique he stroked Vrox with was good enough to get a shudder out of the demon.

“Does he ever shut up?” Dante asked Jesse, mock-exasperated.

“Nah.” Jesse lounged back on his elbows and quirked his eyebrows at his boyfriend, whose face was now a ruddier shade than his hair. “He just gets louder, actually.”

“I’ll see what I can do about that.”

“Fuck you both,” Vrox said through gritted teeth. “Fuck-”

Dante ignored him and shoved him down on the bed, one hand pinning him down while the other kept that slow, devastating rhythum on his cock. “Be quiet, Vrox,” he said, tone for all the world conversational, but for the edge of an inhuman growl that raised the hairs on Jesse’s neck and arms. The power, the authority he always radiated was dialed to eleven now and it was almost overwhelming. He wasn’t even the one the order was directed at and he wanted to obey.

But Vrox, being Vrox, just growled back, tongue running along his teeth.

And Dante shrugged. Took his hand off his cock, sat back on his knees. “Alright,” he said. “Jesse, take off your briefs.”

Like hell Jesse was gonna argue, especially not when Dante grabbed him by the hips and dragged him properly onto the bed. Closer to him. As he lay down between his legs. Oh, fuck.

Vrox barely had time to whine when he realized he’d lost his chance of friction before Dante’s tongue ran up Jesse’s slit.

“Oh, fuck!” The word burst out of Jesse with no chance of stopping it. He knew Vrox was looking at him in betrayal but it wasn’t like he could help it, not when Dante’s fingers had found his dick, stroking in time with his tongue against his entrance-

Vrox couldn’t begrudge him it, not with all the short, sweet sounds leaving Jesse’s mouth, not when Dante kept pulling him closer and harder up against his face like he was starving for him. Instead, he settled back and grabbed his own cock, twisting his palm over the tip and groaning softly.

Jesse was panting already, legs twitching over Dante’s shoulders. God, where had he learned how to do this? When? With who? He really couldn’t bring himself to care as Dante shoved his tongue inside him and his fingers corkscrewed ever so deliciously around his dick.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, don’t stop, keep doing that,” he moaned, fingers scrabbling for purchase in the rumpled blankets. He felt them find warm skin instead, opened his eyes to find Vrox had moved down and taken his hand with his free one. His eyes were burning, that bright blue that turned eerily reflective at night, and they were so filled with hunger and love that Jesse’s hips bucked up into Dante’s face. 

“God, I’m close, I’m so close, please, Dante, please,” he gasped out. Dante merely used his free hand to pin down Jesse’s hips with no effort, not flinching when Jesse writhed with all his strength. Just a bit more, just a bit more-

Dante’s hot, slick lips closed over Jesse’s dick and sucked, hard, and Jesse came, trying to grind down more into his mouth. Vrox hissed as Jesse’s hand clenched on his, not easing up as Dante milked his orgasm for all it was worth.

Jesse relaxed after what felt like a full minute and shook his hair out of his sweat-damp face. “Holy shit,” he breathed.

Dante lifted his head somewhat reluctantly, because he was actually trying to give Jesse a heart attack, and licked Jesse’s slick from his lips. “You,” he said, “taste fucking sweet.”

“Tell me about it,” Vrox said, then laughed as Jesse flipped a pillow up into his face.

Jesse tried to put out the flames in his cheeks by leaning over and yanking open the bedside drawer. It didn’t take him long to find what he was looking for; the little bottle of lube was one of the few things in there. He tossed it to Dante, who caught it without looking.

Jesse nodded at Vrox, who suddenly had the grace to look mildly apprehensive. “Shut him up for me, would you?” he said with a downright evil grin. “He likes it rough.”

“You planning on giving away all my secrets, baby?” Vrox demanded.

“He didn’t need to tell me that,” Dante said. “Not a big surprise you like being a little bitch in the bedroom.”

Vrox turned redder and gave Jesse a nasty look like this was all his fault, Jesse replied with that angelic smile as he closed his fingers around Dante’s cock. Dante sighed into his hair, inching down to run a line of kisses down Jesse’s neck, murmuring approval as Jesse’s fingers rubbed under the tip of his cock, tracing a circle in the wetness dribbling down it. He was big. If Jesse was the one of the bed with his legs open he might have even considered bowing out. But not Vrox, oh no, he faced every obstacle in his way with a clenched, stubborn jaw. Especially if that obstacle was a big dick and his own was hard as sheetrock and an angry red colour.

Watching Vrox get fucked was fun enough on a normal occasion - Jesse didn’t think anything could possibly top that. But watching Dante fuck Vrox into the mattress was even better.

Jesse could feel himself getting wet again, couldn’t help it. Not when Vrox was making all those noises he loved so much, the pathetic little whimpers, bratty whines whenever Dante slowed down. And how he tried to take more control, twist back into Dante’s thrusts to push each one deeper, only for Dante to slam him back down and hold him there while he made those fucking noises and twitched and squirmed.

Jesse slipped a hand down between his legs, saw Vrox’s eyes follow the movement. They met Jesse’s and Vrox’s lips parted in a whine that was lost under Dante’s growl.

“Eyes on me.”

Vrox obeyed instantly, without even thinking ant heat flared in Jesse’s stomach. He slipped two fingers back inside and sank his teeth into his lip, just watching Vrox and Dante lose themselves more and more, bit by bit, until Dante’s hand closed around Vrox’s throat. Not squeezing, not even gripping, just... there. Vrox shuddered.

“You don’t cum till I tell you,” Dante growled. All hound now, barely any human left in his voice. Jesse’s fingers found his sweet spot and he moaned softly behind them, biting his lip to muffle the sound, but Vrox must have heard because his eyelashes fluttered and he groaned. He was such a mess, chest splotched red with a sex flush, legs all but limp over Dante’s hips as they drove into his against and again, each thrust hard enough to jar him further up the bed if Dante’s hands didn’t have a vice grip on his hips - Jesse could already see bruises forming there.

“Did you hear me?”

Vrox nodded frantically. His cock had dripped a puddle of pearly white precum on his own stomach. Jesse’s mouth watered; it’d been a while since he sucked him off...

“Answer me.”

“Y-yes,” Vrox whimpered, voice breaking in time to his thrusts. “I w-won’t cum, I won’t-”

Dante yanked his hips up and thrust deeper and harder, wringing a scream out of Vrox. Jesse knew that angle, had used it many times, knew Dante was thrusting deliberately right into Vrox’s prostate. 

Two more thrusts and he pulled out abruptly and came all over Vrox’s stomach and chest, a growl shuddering out of his chest as he twitched in his own hand. “Fucking hell,” he exhaled hard. Vrox was whining, too fucked out to move, his hips lifting desperately, seeking any kind of friction to push him over the edge. Jesse touched Dante’s back, fast and almost as frantic as Vrox, and Dante, bless him, seemed to understand immediately; he shifted out of Jesse’s way and Jesse pulled himself forward and shoved Vrox into his mouth.

Vrox let out a choked cry and Jesse groaned to taste him on his tongue. He took him deep, ignoring his gag reflex out of sheer determination, and Vrox made the most pitiful sound he’d ever heard. Satisfaction thrummed in his veins.

Dante grabbed Vrox’s jaw above him, forced him to look at him as Jesse bobbed his head on him and hollowed his cheeks. 

“Cum.” The word was a direct order, but even if it hadn’t been, it wouldn’t have mattered with Vrox so far gone. Hot, salty bursts filled Jesse’s mouth; he swallowed each one without hesitation, shivering his way through his own overstimulated second orgasm. Vrox sagged like a puppet with his strings cut and Jesse smiled tiredly, started to clean him off with teasing, kittenish licks.

“Get off,” Vrox grumbled, flapping a hand at him until Jesse rolled over, pretty fucking spent himself. He felt Vrox’s hand smooth over his hair, and smiled.

“Well,” Dante said after a moment, far too cheerfully for somebody who had just fucked the life out of two people. “Who wants waffles?”