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the-bjd-community-confess · 10 months ago

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TW: Sexualization of (fictional) minors discussion/CSA mentions

Mod: Batch post 2 to help people avoid the topic if needed.

1. Idc, people who don’t dress and photograph YOSDs like children are creepy af. If you’re dressing your YOSD in lingerie that’s weird as hell and gross.

~Anonymous

2. "child sex sells" what the fuck is wrong with you? shut the fuck up. touch grass. see light. no the hell it does not. can you be fucking normal for five goddamn minutes? god just delete tumblr and get the fuck away from this and all other hobbies you are the worst sort of human being and i hope you get the help you desperately need because you are seeing child abuse in everything and that, i promise you, is a freakass problem to have. why are you like this???

~Anonymous

3. did NOT want to read the vomitous take of "ch*ld s*x sells" on the doll blog today!!!

~Anonymous

4. fandoms full of """child abuse"""

hi mod it's me again, i'm sorry in advance but this fucking topic makes me actually furious and as long as the most sheltered infants on earth continue to submit brain-dead takes on this subject, i'm going to keep showing up in your dms. CW for discussion of actual abuse, hard subjects in general, etc.

(i would put the read more here) [Mod: I hope you don't mind this format instead Anon, this confession deserves its own post but I want to shield readers from the topic if possible with the batchposting 💜]

ok but that's just it, as a fucking csa survivor, most of the "fandoms full of CSA" literally! have none of that! whatsoever! in any capacity! you shitty godforsaken little heathens call sfw romance between two fictional teenagers in a tv show incest-coded, you call grown ass-adults in animated works "child-coded" and justify that as the same as goddamn ABUSE OF REAL LIFE HUMAN BEINGS, and you doxx creators and send them death threats and clog up report lines for real life actual human victims about your fictional bullshit. you are the worst and i want you and anyone who reads this and feels offended by this description to know that you are helping no one and annoying everyone.

do you know what real victims are victimized by? not fiction. not any fiction. not inanimate objects! literally write a story about fictional children being victimized for the plot, and it will not hurt me. if it hurts you, fair! stop reading it. go outside. your Personal Discomfort is not you being abused. learn the fucking difference perhaps! it will not make me... do you have any idea how hard it is to talk about this without getting so extremely goddamn personal? do you have any idea how much it sucks to have to have this discussion over and over and over? do you realize that roughly 10 years ago everyone with a braincell agreed on this point and it's only the last decade that people have been so radicalized to think that wrongthink is real? no, of course not, because most of the people who believe that fiction and reality are 1:1 in how one affects the other have no practical experience with any of the subjects upon which they have the audacity to speak.

listen. i am not going to go into my upbringing. i am not going to tell you what it was like to be raised in a household like mine where actual abuse was genuinely normalized. all i will say is that i was raised in a culture where this sort of abuse was normal and certain types of relationships between adults and minors were considered... sanctioned by the powers that be. are you picking up what i'm laying down? do not talk to me about your good intentions. the fucking argument that fictional content, drawings and toys and all that other inconsequential shit, that it's tantamount to a crime? buddy. bestie! amigo! compadre! that's the same logic that was used to make sure my upbringing was as sheltered and controlled as possible so that the "corrupting influences" of the outside world didn't give us the "wrong ideas". like i truly don't know how you did it but you've reinvented the toxic mindset i grew up hearing! and you are completely blind to it. boggles my fucking brain.

i just want to shake the people who say this shit with a straight face. "wow so violent op maybe you're the toxic one" yeah boy i'm toxic i've been in therapy for most of my life and will continue to be until i am dead. the fucking DRAWING CARTOON PORN IS INDOCTRINATING MINORS WRITING StORIES WHERE BAD THINGS HAPPEN IS THE SAME AS HARMING A REAL HUMAN crowd are just the same religious wrongthink crowd with a more recent birth-year and a rainbow hat. "anyone can say anything online i don't believe you" cool i don't give a shit. how do you want me to prove it, doxxing myself? you wanna see the fucking recordings anon? think before you speak. first time for everything.

i like this hobby. i enjoy my dumb little dolls and their stupid little faces, i enjoy the peace in changing their style and redoing their faceups, i enjoy being able to represent a diversity of appearances, identities, to make everyone queer and slutty because i'm making up for the lost time in my life where that was not on the table for me. i do Not fucking relish seeing the braindead anti arguments creeping into this hobby and shitting up another thing that myself and other survivors would like to enjoy in peace and quiet.

so let me tell you, from the bottom of my heart, even though no one who needs to hear it will bother to listen to the words of a survivor because it goes against your superiority complex against those nasty fiction enjoyers:

shut the fuck up.

sincerely, god, everyone, and especially survivors of CSA and other abuse against minors.

~Anonymous

#BJD #ABJD #BJD Confessions #Community Confessions

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achromaticsremixture · 8 months ago

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Chapter 2

Madara: Oya, oya, Arashi! Put in a bit more energy, and let your voice ring from your diaphragm!

Madara: Yosh! Yell with me, Arashi! WELCOME, WELCOME WELCOME WELCOMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

Hajime: U-um…? Mikejima-senpai, Narukami-senpai…how are you…?

Madara: Oh? We’ve attracted two adorable little customers immediately! The round cakes are very cheap right now, they’re only 3000 yen! If you put loaaaads of strawberries on top, they’ll be even tastier!

Hajime: N-no, we’re not customers…

Hajime: Are Mikejima-senpai and Narukami-senpai working at the pastry shop?

Madara: Yes. Our friend asked us to help gather customers! Christmas is the season for pastry shops, after all.

Madara: Come on, Arashi. Stop looking so bored. Smile for Mama, okay~?

Madara: If you’re too shy to yell, I’ll go and serve the customers myself~

Madara: Arashi just needs to smile and wave at the customers, okay?

Madara: You’re a beautiful girl, so everyone will stop and stare!

Arashi: Wait!! We only agreed to smiling!! I only decided to come help because I didn’t think we’d need to yell!

Arashi: And in the end…we’ve been stuck standing out here in the cold. What if I catch a bug?!

Madara: Oho! There’s no need to worry! Arashi’s just the same as me, isn’t she? She’s also bundled up with warmth packs inside her uniform~

Madara: Unlike you, I’m so hot that I want to take off all my clothes!

Arashi: Alright, alright!! I’m wrong, okay??? I won’t be cold right now, but this job…it’s so thankless!!

Arashi: I only accepted this job because I thought I could stand outside wearing a Santa costume!

Arashi: This is a form of scamming, Mama. You scammed me with the “there’s a cute santa costume” from the beginning!

Madara: No, I’m not lying~ I really had them prepare a cute Santa costume!

Madara: Just…it’s made for girls. I don’t think it’s really suited for Arashi, is it? Since Arashi doesn’t like wearing tight and revealing clothes.

Arashi: Yeah..you’re right. But this job is really so BORING!! Mama, can I go home now?

Madara: Hm~ But we haven’t reached our goal yet. If you go back now, then I’ll be suuper bothered. Help me out for a bit longer, will you?

Madara: After we’re done, we get free cakes!!

Arashi: No…no…I don’t want the cakes…

Madara: Hm? Arashi, don’t you like eating sweet things?

Arashi: I do like eating sweets, but…I’ve been putting on weight lately, so I have to watch what I eat.

Arashi: That’s why even if we get cakes, I’ll feel bad, okay?

Madara: Nah, Arashi! I don’t think you look fat at all! You’ve just been gaining muscle from what I’ve observed~

Arashi: Ugh…Mama!! I hate how I easily gain muscle, and you just bring it up like that?!

Madara: Sorry, sorry! But, that’s how it is, is it?

Madara: I wanted to ask Arashi for help tomorrow as well…ahh, this is such a chore!! My braincells are slowly dying one by one!!

Arashi: Why do you even need to help them out after tomorrow? The other party only asked Mama to help out for one day, right?

Madara: No? We need to help from the next few days onwards. Did I forget to tell you, Arashi?

Madara: After all, we’re hosting the S1 on Christmas Day. This job is a nice one that won’t last until Christmas Day/Silent Night, so I took it!

Madara: Anyways, the point is that they want us to help tomorrow and the day after too!

Madara: I’ll find someone else to come help tomorrow, but it was already really hard getting a volunteer today…

Madara: So, Arashi…even if you want me to kneel down, even if you want me to do the most humiliating things…I’ll do it! I’m just begging you, please help out this once!

Arashi: A person like you kneeling down in the middle of the road would just attract attention!! Sigh, I really can’t deal with you, can I…?

Arashi: We’re ride or die, right? I’ll stay with you until the end of the day.

Tomoya: Ah, both of you look very busy…then we’ll see you soon!

Tomoya: About the customers, please work hard!! Hey, Hajime! Let’s go!

Tomoya: They’re working so hard…I kinda feel bad for disturbing them.

Tomoya: I remember Hajime used to take this kind of job before. It’s really a pain in the ass, right?

Hajime: ………..

Tomoya: Hajime!! Oi~ I’m talking to you, Hajime!

Hajime: Oh. Uh, Tomoya? You were saying?

Tomoya: How are you always lost in the clouds like this…what are you thinking about? I’m always here for you, you know?

Hajime: Ah- it’s nothing…I was just thinking about what we’d eat for dinner tonight…

Hajime: Tomoya, my parents will be worried if I get back late. Let’s go back early~

#madara mikejima #arashi narukami #ensemble stars #hajime shino #tomoya mashiro

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yesteryearsnows · 1 year ago

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Today I played for two hours and had to reload three different times bc

1) Fought the outside group in the goblin camp and got murderized by ranged attacks

2) fought the goblin camp, again but from the waypoint to try and bottleneck everyone but it Did Not Work

3) found withers stupid crypt after fighting and disarming and unlocking traps and he. Just straight up did not appear. Appears to be a known bug only fixed by reloading

Aka Life Is Hard for someone who is so spoiled by grinding who has to Use Braincells. Like I had to look up a tutorial on how to unlock doors level of painful. My ego is so bruised rn

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simpingwriter · 2 years ago

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Cal Kestis x Kyra Yarmot

'Revenge and Redemption:

In the Name of Love'

Pt.2

___________________

Heyyy, Happy May the Fourth to everyone reading this chapter today!

And yeahhhh... I know I said I would take it a bit slower with the second book. But tbh...with me, that's a good sign if i don't. Means I still like writing for these two braincells in a left over Styrofoam Cup – constantly bumping into each other, their only viable source of useable thoughts – and probably won't lose interest (please, great Gods of writer's block, have mercy with me boasting, i love my two fucked up dumbasses! 😭)

P.s: Totally not already a good quarter into Chapter 3...

Kyra meets the Grand Inquisitor for her Initiation. And ofc she immediately wants to fist fight and question authority once more–

Enjoy! :)

Word Count: approx. 3.200 Words

___________________

When the next morning came, something you finally could be sure of again with being on a Planet – well, a moon – and not a stupid ship, Cal was there before Dr. Puloria, eyes starting to shine even brighter then they were already when he finally saw you looking back at him this time.

Four weeks of looking at your motionless, dead-like body, wondering if you would actually wake back up someday…you didn't want to imagine the loop of thoughts the poor boy went through each and every morning with no significant changes being reported by Dr. Puloria or the nurses that took care of you, except that your lacerations from the fall were at least healing.

The Doctor had arrived only a few minutes later, grimacing when she saw the time…did you really sleep for that long?

One could possibly be stupid enough to think that after a four week long karking coma you wouldn't need sleep for a good ass while, that you would wake up more rested than ever. But it was the entire opposite, waking up you felt like you just pulled an all nighter and then some. So it didn't surprise Cal at all when – without any warning from your side – you fell asleep on his explanation the Fort and the work that came from being an Inquisitor now, his voice the most calming thing to your ears after being surrounded by nothing but deafening silence.

He knew that you would listen to him rant any day, but yesterday was just...way too much for you. And once you had everything important of today behind you, you would probably fall asleep right on him again, but he wouldn't mind, especially if you literally fell asleep on him, he always wanted to know what it was like sharing a big bed with someone. His was so cold and empty...

He wouldn't mind even if you fell asleep during him talking about whatever came to mind for another whole week, because now could be sure he would see you again, day for day, week for week, no urgency pushing him to make the most of every second he had left with you…

The first thing Dr. Puloria did, as promised, was cut the thick layers of gauze off of your squeezed in wing. While it at least wasn't cold around it, something you hated – cold wings – it was very uncomfortable. Which became evident when the gauze was finally fully off, revealing a severely crinkled and depressed wing. Like freshly hatched…

"You can move it, don't worry about having to keep it that crumbled up, just be very careful and do not under any circumstance overstretch the membrane for at least another two weeks. The medical soldering is right about here…"

To say it felt odd having someone else touch your wings than yourself was a plain understatement, but Cal had touched them before as well and it didn't feel so...intrusive, even before you officially began to share an emotional bond. You remember the day when you first let him feel the leathery membranes between the flexible yet hard wing bones, his touch feather light and anxious even though you told him multiple times that his human fingers wouldn't be able to harm them really that much.

Even then his touches already had a weirdly soothing effect on you, especially after your returning nightmares and night terrors…

Was this maybe foreshadowing your eventual bonding?

"Also, after your initiation hearing today is finished and you managed to settle in on the Base, I would really appreciate it if you could find the time to listen to a request of mine, but only if you're alright with that." The older woman threw hastily into the room as she looked for the holopad that held the release forms with your name prewritten on them. What request could she possibly mean?

"I think she means these Research Papers I had to interrupt her about yesterday. She was barely able to contain herself while she had to take your body's measurements for your own uniforms…" Cal sounded incredibly odd at the last sentence, partially swallowing some words he wished to say but then decided not to as he looked at the Doctor with an unreadable expression.

Did he not like seeing her touching you?

"I don't." Cal grumbles quietly, having become much more direct since the last time you really talked – that being on the Mantis after your eventful day on Tatooine – you had to realize as the woman you talked about got slightly but noticeably red at herself being mentioned, "I-I was given the direct Orders to take the measurements of your wings, tail and your feet as they very obviously deviate from the average measurements of any other Imperial Inquisitor." She stated in a rather matter of fact manner, but either way not managing all of it without a stutter at the beginning, clearing up at least some of it.

What it didn't clear up was her excitement, apparent request and the connection to the research papers though. So basically nothing...what a waste of time.

"What is your request then?"

She stops looking for the paper a moment, looking over her shoulder with an expression you could only sort as "embarrassed yet determined".

"Because I want to finish the medical research for the Kaluk, the work of my master and his colleagues…"

The…Kaluk?

All your life, in all these pages and books you read about your kind, your own species…not once had the name Kaluk even been mentioned. So why was she calling you that name?

"Kaluk? I never heard that name for my kind." "Because it was wiped from all history books that have been written recently…that would mean the entirety of the last 30 to 40 cycles. All older ones are either destroyed or in the Empire's care." They even wiped the real name of your people off the face of the Galaxy…they really took everything from them. From you. From everyone that once, a long time ago, listened to that name. It sounded nice...you wish you had known about it earlier.

"Why would they do such a thing?!" You ask back irritated, not at her obviously, but at the Republic once more, further deepening your new found hate for them. They really deserved what came upon them…

"Well, some Scholars, of the Sith of course in that case, came to a very simple yet awful conclusion about that: The conventional approach of naming certain things or a species made them look more...approachable, in the case of the Kaluk, actual living, breathing and intelligent sentient people, taking away their name also took away relatability, the human aspect you and your ancestors all show, some more and some less. That method turned them into mysterious and extinct creatures…"

She even knew about the different sub categories of your ki- the Kaluk…how broad were the research papers of these scholars? Were there only the medical papers left or was there even more to be read about…things you had never heard about yourself?

There must be so many things about you yourself you had never been made aware of, maybe because they didn't want you to know or even because they themselves – despite their huge resource pool available just for research projects alone – never went that deep into your actual Culture themselves. They only saw the profits to be gained on Rhothant and in the Kaluk…

Dr. Puloria stopped the conversation of that subject at that for now, seeing the same problem as Cal when you yourself went to grab his left hand to calm back down, feeling your body begin to tremble. He didn't waste any time to give you exactly what you needed, gently drawing messy circles across the rough skin and scales. It would take ages for you to find peace in this subject as well, maybe you'd even carry this deep dug grudge to your equally deep grave.

"I shouldn't have brought it up right now, my most sincere apologies. I-I...no- Here, please sign these and you're free to go until the next planned check up…"

It was evident in her rushed words that your sudden change of mood at that piece of information made her feel uncomfortable, but mostly regretful. She knew the extinction of your kind must've been hard, though how should she have known that it troubled you that badly? Nodding at her nearly fumbled statement for the form, you take the holopad from her hands, immediately sensing the slight tremor in them.

Fear.

Now you could also faintly smell it...

She was afraid you would lash out from your increasingly bad mood.

"I'm not mad at you, Doctor." You simply state while signing with your last name, returning the holopad onto her cluttered desk when she didn't react at your attempt of giving it back to her. Your response probably startled her just a bit too much.

Cal's impatient pulling of your hand that had already been in his made it clear though that you had no time to idle your time, for example with making sure you didn't give her the same prey-like fear Greez once upon a time felt near you. Not that you knew of Humans ever having had actual problems regarding your pheromones distinctive to predators.

If anything, Humans were incredibly underdeveloped when it was about scents and pheromones of other species or even their own! They sometimes vaguely noticed them, but never in the obvious way, they were controlled by them subtly, without them ever truly realizing that it was Pheromones that made them act like this or like that.

And then there is Cal. You didn't know if he also didn't directly notices the pheromones…but it was obvious on him, though maybe only for you as his mate? To you, he was visible even with your eyes closed, he pretty was unmistakable to your sensitive smell with this almost overpowering sweetness and near aromatic waves of male pheromones coming from every pore. No cologne could challenge what he smelled like to you...like your personal heaven.

You loved the way they enveloped your senses, just like his hugs. They gave you this feeling of safety you never had before. And everytime you lost this feeling for too long, you already felt the madness and fear reaching their claws into your mind.

"I love you, Cal…" the words left your lips unexpectedly as he guided you down the halls of the new base, your new…home. It stopped him from his quick and wide steps, his golden eyes watching yours – and the emotions hidden within – closely as his mouth hung open ever so slightly before turning into an inviting smile, his left arm wrapped even tighter around your waist now. "I love you too, Dragonfly and always will." He sealed his renewed confession with a long kiss, lips burning up against yours before he parts from you once more with a heavy sigh.

Right…you're both wasting time with your sentimental needs right now. And you would have enough time later on for all kinds of loving or intimate gestures, especially for all the times you missed out on that possibility with your unfortunate time-out.

"Don't worry, I am certain he will make the initiation quick. The Grand Inquisitor has been very busy in the last few days from what I have heard. After that, you will be given a room and you'll have some time to…let everything sink in. I know that I needed it, despite me having been prepared for everything…in the end i was grateful for the buffering time you're getting." He shook you two's interaction off for the sake of not becoming late – despite it being almost painful to disappoint both of you – going down a vague list of what would happen today, not once letting go of your side as you walked further, at least wanting to give you his physical touch as he knew thanks to your thoughtsthat you yearned for it badly. No more hiding…it almost made you want to jump at him instead of just kissing him.

After ten minutes of similar looking dark corridors and bridges – "You're gonna have to grow used to that..." – you stand in front of two impressive double doors. Not ceiling high but quite obviously different from the rest, letting it be known that behind these doors, something important lies. They made him restless though, his black and red gloves fixing his grip on your waist every few seconds before he finally got a grip on the situation and made both of your presences known by knocking loudly.

What gave him the reason to act so off?

"What might come…that's what." He answered as quiet as a whisper as the doors slid open with a hiss, granting the two of you access. The room was more like a hall. A throne room, but more useful, like of a military commander in the end. And for the first time in your life you were in the same room as eleven…twelve…alive Inquisitors. All breathing and staring you down quietly as they awaited their master to speak…

The Grand Inquisitor.

You had heard very few things of the Pau'an himself, unlike the many tales of people encountering Inquisitors – plus your own – had but you were always been aware that he apparently existed, commanding those below him.

And now, he also sat while the others stood, on a big chair towards the far back of the middle. While the others were just staring at you, he tried to probe you with his gaze, you felt his attempts at going even further but blocked any of them with ease. From his perspective, it was probably just Cal and maybe – if you're lucky – Trilla who talked about your desire to join. The others either didn't know you or if they did…well, they would only see the Jedi Scum in you. Nothing else.

The only thing that held them back from trying to decapitate you was that they most likely have been informed about an "Initiation" today. That there was a Jed- Force Sensitive on Nur that switched sides.

You didn't even want to call yourself Jedi anymore, feeling grimy about that name and their religion after you heard what they helped the Republic with, even with their whole peace keeling agenda. All for some Kyber Crystals they couldn't even use like regular ones…the Crystals choose their Owner, never other way.

"Greeting, Grand Inquisitor!" Cal shouts loud enough to reach the ears of the grey older man, relief washing over him as you caught onto his body movements without his help and kneeled down alongside him. Praise the Connection you two had, once again.

"I brought you the girl who renounced her loyalty to the Jedi four weeks ago." He sounded pragmatic and logical in his choosing of words, a total difference to your Cal that usually lets his heart talk. You had known that he most likely had been put under special physical training to become an Inquisitor, but you didn't expect this of everything possible.

"Very well, Eleventh Brother, join the others."

What? You're supposed to talk for yourself? Alone, in front of them all!? Well that isn't going to end well, you can't control your mouth like Cal now apparently!

Cal, while he definitely heard your panicked thoughts, the begs for him to stay with you, couldn't stay any second longer than needed, giving you one last reassuring nod and squeeze on your shoulder before he did as he was told, standing back up and finding himself next to Trilla, who was wearing her helmet – making reading her emotions difficult...but not impossible if needed.

But she was probably going to be indifferent to whatever happened to you, your potential death due to your big mouth wouldn't mean the end of her world.

Not that you would let yourself get killed that easily. If needed, you would fight them all to the ground and they would learn that sooner or later. At least once they also pulled you into physical training.

"Rise, Kyra Yarmot." You did, straightening your back on instinct, wincing at your neck brace protesting and pushing against said sensitive neck. But you had to come through with this, this is all it took to be at Cal's side. All it took…

"How come that we get two Jedis renouncing their loyalty in such a short span of time? Nonetheless two that very evidently know each other better?" Oh that sounds…like an accusation.

Accusations never end well.

Okay, it's easy, Kyra, just tell them exactly what moved your decision, you have absolutely no reason to lie or to make things up, you got your reasons! "I found out about the Republic's dishonorable and dishonest deeds on Rhothant. I have been lied to all my life and…I…I can't no longer serve under their name, especially not the Jedi." He slowly nodded at your own explanation of the last events, before noticing something on your face it seems, just like Cere before him. It made him squint, deviating from his stiff posture when his head tilted in confusion. Unlike Cere, it did not anger him. It merely seemed to further fuel his intrigue.

"How come your exceptionally quick change of heart? Explain…"

Didn't you just tell him that, was this grey pebble hard of hearing? Deaf perhaps? You didn't want to talk anymore about it than needed!

What are you supposed to explain?! How they killed them by letting them work to total exhaustion? Abused them? Let everything important about their whole existence that made them who they were just vanish like that or how they lied to you about this For. All. These. Years?!

They bathed themselves in innocence while your people DIED for their insufferable greed!

'Kyra! Please! Calm down!'

Cal's thoughts passed you for a second, breaking the spell you put on your own mind as you heard yourself, speaking your thoughts out loud it seems, your voice not sounding like your own as you sounded more like a beast growling its threats than anything else.

But that reaction…it further looked like it pleased the Grand Inquisitor, as he intently watched your…eyes?

While your still injured body had to work with the sudden spur of buried emotions shooting back up, chest heaving and hot steam puffing out from your mouth with every heavy breath you took, the other Inquisitors' stares…changed. Even with their helmets on, you could feel them on you still yet not as harsh as before.

"Anger festers inside of you…but unlike with others, while your body doesn't fight it, it also can't take full influence over your actions, nor does it have a big effect on your appearance. Very interesting…so the old knowledge of the Kaluk hasn't been lying…"

Old knowledge? Does he also speak of research papers?

You're not given any time to think about his words as two Purge Troopers walked to your side, grabbing your upper arms tightly. Did they not know what kind of danger they just got themselves into just by approaching you? In this state of yours?

"Shall we bring her to the chamber now, Grand Inquisitor?"

C-chamber? They must be speaking of…n-no! No! You're not letting them scramble and rewire your brain, you're working and thinking perfectly fine! You're here on your own free will and haven't been captured!

Cal's eyes widened as he gasped in shock, but he knew too well that he wasn't allowed to intercept the Troopers either as they tried to drag you away from your current spot in the massive hall. His inner pain was deafening to you like a visible scream, he didn't know why this was happening either.

Putting emphasis on the word 'tried', the Purge Troopers struggling hopelessly as you used your still naked feet to your advantage, their sharp digging into the metal floor with worrying ease. It wasn't hard to escape their grasps fully a few seconds later, the sudden snapping back of your neck drawing an angry, deep shriek from your lips as you glared at them, silently daring them to try it a second time, opening your curled hands to show off your claws as a warning. "Kyra Yarmot, are you having second feelings now, of all times? Because I am sure the Inquisitors can help…choose…for you."

Like hell you were having second feelings, you're here on your own free will, you're not going to let them ruin your freedom like this, not when you're in arms length! You're not going to become mindless puppet, you're a soldier with thoughts, just like your ancestors were! They wouldn't want anything else from their possibly last surviving genes...

"Don't even think a second time about strapping me to your awful torture chair, if you have second thoughts about my loyalty, I will do the needed things to prove myself on other ways!" Otherwise you would give them a taste of what you're capable of!

Once more, you feel it surging inside of you, flowing like a violent network of rivers…your physical wounds exhausted you too much to have a tight enough control over your Connection to the Force. If they edged you on any longer…

You saw the sparks slowly starting to form and the heavy smoke weaving around you in the air, a sure sign for yourself to calm back down…Cal was in this room, he would die alongside them if you weren't able to hold on.

And the Grand Inquisitor had to have been feeling it too, grunting...pleased, "Troopers! Stand aside immediately! Do. NOT. Touch. Her!"

You could've electrocuted their equipment with a simple touch, in turn roasting them inside their armored black shells. How did he know about that…

"This was a test, you can relax…Twelfth Sister."

Then, a laugh. Not a kind or heart warming one, a sinister one, like a madman that achieved his plan. When the caught him self shortly after, the Troopers walking back to their positions at the door and the Inquisitors all relaxed once more, multiple already having had their hands ready to ignite their weapons, he began to speak once more...

A TEST?! Even Jedi school had less shitty tests than this one, you could've blown everything up if he would've let them go on like this without knowing your limits!

But wait…did he just call you Twelfth Sister?

"That means you passed. You're no use to the Empire without your species' naturally strong connection to the Dark side and your own raw emotions. No synthetic emotion could challenge whatever it is that is fueling your strengths deep inside…though you two's existence could potentially be breaking an ages old Rule…"

He mentioned Cal, which made you look for him on reflex. Panic wanted to light up in your head when he was no longer next to Trilla, never mind her, she was no longer there either!

"I hope you're more willing to gather your bearings at their sides? We already had to fix the Hull once because of…someone…almost over half a cycle ago." There would've more than a karking hole, old man. There can be no hole if there is no longer a foundation for said hole!

Has nobody ever told him to keep his hands off the stove as a child, to not play with fire?

"It's okay, Kyra, you're alright…nobody is getting reconditioned today…well, of those in this room at least." He hushed your thoughts, carefully beginning to inch closer with each gentle touch on your skin as he wasn't wearing armor filled with electrical equipment, hoping he could leave this room as soon as possible. He didn't like it's atmosphere at all, especially with a literal time bomb like you right in the middle of it...

But there was one more thing you needed to tell the irritating pebble of a man back there, calmed down yet or not.

"In that case, I got my first request, Grand Inquisitor."

"Voice it then, Twelfth Sister, but make it quick."

Well, they couldn't say much more than no, so you should ask no rather than later.

"I wish to share my rooms with the Eleventh Brother..."

Deafening silence…

___________________

#star wars fallen order #cal kestis #cal kestis x oc #fallen order cal kestis #star wars cal kestis #star wars fanfiction #star wars fanfic #cal kestis fanfic #inquisitor cal kestis x oc #inquisitor cal kestis #so many tags #i need a template for them all-#fallen order fanfic #star wars x oc #oc fanfiction

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semuakarnacinta · 2 months ago

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19 December 2024

Been having the toughest year of my life

Hhh im back after years of going off grid (only from tumblr tho). I even got tumblr uninstalled from my phone hhhh. But after i reinstall it, i’ve been reading my posts and it’s mostly from… 2017… which is SEVEN years ago?!?! Are u crazy?! Funny how time can went by so fast yet so slow and it all depends on your perspective and.. particular life events.

And actually, the biggest problem im facing right now it’s not that different from 2017. Which is … WORRYING.

Yeah im probably the biggest and loudest worrier you will ever meet in ur life. (My boyf and my fam can confirm)

I yearned for a more adventurous and sensational life yet i got scared soo easily when im facing something new (and hard and confusing and out of my comfort zone).

2024 has been a lot. Finally finishing university, endlessly searching for jobs, starting a new job. And most of all…. Adulting. Never thought it would be so hard (and melancholic, nostalgic, and quite lonely). I look around and see how people can seem so good at it while im literally hanging on a thread most of the days.

THINK LESS. is one of the lesson i have yet to learn in order to survive. Worrying comes from thinking too much about things that are mostly not true and maybe havent even happened (and prolly never will).

Maybe that’s true. Maybe i think too much (and maybe even taking pride in it)

‘Life’s more painless for the brainless’

Last week was the ultimate nightmare for me. I was crying everyday in the office’s toilet (and even in front of people too). Last week’s event really did take a toll on me and ive taken 2 days of sick leave this week.

But actually with me being sick, it kinda shut a few of my braincells off and make me think…less. Although there’s like a lot of things i have to do, but doing it while being sick makes me think less about the whole idea and just focus more on the task. I kinda dont care if im doing it wrong, or cant meet the deadline or what work will come next. Well maybe that’s actually the trick into being less depressed (not being sick tho, just being focus on what’s in front of you and nothing else).

That aside, i’ve also been questioning this job. Why God put me in this soul-sucking job with a workaholic no empathy boss and a greedy stingy company. I want a job with a (good) purpose. And i just cant seem to connect emotionally with the work im doing and it leaves me working without any sense of meaning.

BUT It is never about the job isnt it?

It’s about how i handle it. It’s about how i can do my best even at the worst and non ideal condition. Even when i cant see the light at the end of the tunnel. It’s about trusting. It’s about surrendering. It’s about relying fully on God’s power when i have none left in me.

The job is just a means to an end. It’s never the goal or the destination.

So keep your chin up aneth, take things slowly, enjoy the little things wholly, dont take everything so seriously, and look at life more hopefully.

So i guess that’s it for today. I hope that i can write more often in here.

Bye for now🩷

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rattyydotmp3 · 2 years ago

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Actually, I have more to say, because it really REALLY GETS MY GOAT.

I work as an IT Engineer. Five days a week, 8 hours a day I’m sat in front of a desk fixing things. OS, software, hardware, etc. The estate we manage (healthcare IT provider/MSP) is serviced on mostly Fujitsu desktop PCs and Dell laptops. Very very middle range. They are the most computers ever. Not underpowered in theory, but god. GOD . So much bloat and terrible optimisation everywhere means I get at least a few tickets a day of PCs bricking themselves over the most trivial things.

Teams starting at launch and immediately just idling in background? That’s one of your 8gb of ram gone.

Medical scheduling/patient record software that every part of the NHS from doctors to receptionists use? Bloat upon bloat, will happily chew up a solid 10-20% of the CPU load and a further 2 gigs of ram doing sweet fuck all. Ask anyone you know in the NHS about EMIS and SystmOne - they’ll tell you they are pigs.

I could go on about programs that are just horrendously optimised resource hogs, like how steam takes up around 600mb of RAM just idling in the background with no windows open for days but it’s all to the same end. But that’s not the only wwhinge I have today, sadly!

TEMP FILES. TEMP FUCKING FILES. No software in the last ten years, it seems, has been made by people with the time or braincells to actually make those files… temporary. Outlook still caches from the exchange for the whole lifespan of the mailboxes in your profile, by default. In 2023. It’s beyond baffling - our estate gets ~500mgb/s down on full fibre across the board. It’s not 1995 - you don’t need to fucking cache a decade of emails BY DEFAULT. These files get to dozens of gigabytes and can eat up basically the whole harddrive if left unchecked.

Here’s another horrendous example from my wonderful friend @cyber-clown

All this is to say, if you’re at all involved in IT as a hobbyist or as a job you are constantly marketed to, as with anything. Bigger hard drives! Faster CPUS! More VRAM! More cores !! More MORE MORE etc. but more to support what, exactly? To boot an operating system faster? Wouldn’t it boot faster if it didn’t come pre-bundled with fucking candy crush? Would it need as much just to sit idle without hundreds of megabytes of telemetry being broadcasted every session?

Every time I boot in to windows it’s like taking a manhole to the face, the amount of graceless over-designed and inefficient wankery in modern proprietary environments.

It’s really no different to the rest of consumer rot, we have more and more and more and more, and seemingly less and less clue what to do with any of it, aside from using it for its own sake so we don’t feel like it’s wasted.

Evergreen headline.

#I meant to write manhole cover in the last paragraph #I’m leaving the typo in because much funnier #hhaha #man hole #like bussy haha like the uh #effort post YIPPIEEE

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rage-and-rain · 1 year ago

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my first reaction to anything isn't always logical, rational, sensible, kind, considerate. there are days where it can happen longer than expected. in my mind, i'm ready to assault anyone who make me feel slightly inconvenient. but thanks to my weak-yet-enduring rational braincells, i give myself more time before making any destructive decision.

i haven't told anyone how bad this is to me, because i'm busy (overwhelmed) with work at the moment and so i don't have time to heal myself, to think clearly, and don't know when will this end.

i almost roughly end 2 long-time friendships at once some days ago because i was too tired and mad at myself, and both were pushing me too hard i doubt they notice me being frustrated with them at all. i swear if they push me one more time, i will cuss at them before blocking them on every socials.

it was really that terrible.

however, it has passed, quite well.

i just don't want to meet anyone i'm not interested in, i really do.

sorry that i actually want to choose my people any day.

i can't say yes to every invitation. i did ask to a good friend regarding, have i been too nice? responsive? easy girl? yes girl? people pleaser?

can't remember her response all i remember is that i'm still frustrated with almost everything, everything seems infuriating. well, not really, i'm just infuriated with friends who keep pushing me just because we've been good friends for so many years.

i think no friend should feel entitled with the other friend, just because they're long-time friend. boundary must still be set regardless.

i can choose who i want to hang out with because in the end of the day, i have to save myself first because nobody will do that for me. and i'd like everyone to think the same, the same goes with my friends.

i know i'm sounded dramatic for expressing all of these rage, but it's really that bad. i don't know how else to describe it. it is what it is.

i really hate hiding stuff from people i'm linked with. but really, i'm getting uncomfortable with people associating me being active on social as free to ask me out. surely i'm free to ask out, but, i'm not free to hang out.

the fact that i'm not sure to post stuff anymore on socials worrying that another friend will think i'm free and 'force' to me hang out.

so i start to take a break from socials where i'm mutual with friends, effectively from today. don't know how long will this last, but hopefully longer than i expected.

i need actual character development but unable to figure it out at the moment because my nose is always at work.

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drippingmoon · 3 years ago

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Last Lines Tag Game

Thanks a lot for the tag, @cassie-writes-things!<3 Slowly coming back from my hiatus, and these fun lines stuck with me when reading

When leaving the starfields, there was always that emptiness. As wings folded into one another, lights going out from the head of the system to the bottom. They came crashing into her outwings, and perhaps it wasn’t only her impression that stepping back onto the cloudway, the weight of the world shrank to invisible fetters around their ankles, pulling them down.

Imera dropped like a rock, unused to the change. Anne watched impassively as he rolled down all hundred steps, bouncing like the ball people would kick on visitation mornings, and shrugged one shoulder.

Perhaps the pain would take his mind off her, and he wouldn’t watch her as he would a monster?

Open tag as always! I'll also be tagging this time, uh, I'm actually not sure who liked these, I think word finds are more popular? But anyway: @thegreatobsesso, @oh-no-another-idea, @talesofsorrowandofruin and @vellichor-virgo if you're so inclined

#tag games #aquiver-aglow #draft 2 #so in 'quiv-related news i finished reading the draft and today i'll finally be able to get started on the outline hopefully #and it left me with such a powerful wave of hope and warmth🥺 feels like i'm on the right road #and among my incoherent chicken scratches for notes i actually managed to tie up a lot of loose ends and tighten the structure #i absolutely can't wait for draft 3🥺🥺#i dialled back the darker elements in draft 2 but uh they'll make a pretty hard comeback next time #and slowly slowly getting to the end #i also did the mother very dirty🤣🤣#anyway i hope none of you will ever have to make a glossary. that kind of tedious work murders your braincells #oh oh and as a fun guessing game if you want #guess who actually made me cry during reading lol #on other random news almost all my new ideas came again as... yeah shower thoughts. and that's the title of the doc too🤣#'divine shower thoughts'

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periidoti · 1 year ago

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I had to copy these from Wattpad but whatever, also anything that is italicized is messed uo

Part 1:

Pepper x Candle moment.

I am the only person who ships this.

BUT NOW YOU WILL TOO!!

I hope.

Rarepair moment. Also I'll change the cover of this book.

Tf am I yapping about

Humanized.

Also uhm, this one actually isn't a one shot. There's gonna be 2 parts. HAH twoshot.

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───.𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚

Pepper got up. Well, she has nothing to do today. Salt's on vacation. What is she supposed to do? She's so bored, maybe she'll check her phone. Oh hey, looks like there's something in the hotel oj group chat!

HotelManagerOJ: New people are coming today. Please be polite or else.

FiberHelper: OJ. No violence. I've told you this.

HotelManagerOJ: THATS NOT WHAT I MEANT-

HotelManagerOJ: They arrive at 8:00. Be nice or else.

Pepper turned off her phone. Hopefully she can actually talk to someone! Her codependency is getting to her. It really is. She needs something better to do with her life.

(Ok ok out of story but the couple nearby is fighting AGAIN.)

Pepper went downstairs, hoping the new people weren't there yet. She'll probably go to Starbucks and get herself a Pumpkin Spice latte, maybe do some of her online classes? Luckily for her, they weren't here yet. Pepper took her keys, unlocked her car, got in, locked it, and drove away.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆

I came back, somehow surviving the longest line ever while freezing outside. Jesus, fall was odd. I look terrible now! My hair was practically ripped out because I got the last drink! They stole my FUCKING CAKE POP! At least they're not set to arrive until 8, so I have.. an hour. Better hurry.

I detangle my thick, coily hair. It bounces quite nicely! Maybe I'll turn them into afro puffs? I tried asking Salt. DUMBASS. Pepper gain a single braincell. You are the sole reason that gal passed. The SOLE REASON. Now get your act together and DO WHATEVER THE FUCK IT IS YOU WANT! Okay, calm down. You can't find out what the else is. Well, maybe just these clips and..

Done!

I look and feel pretty. Well, it's 7:50, so I could head down now.. hopefully people think I look presentable enough.

I head downstairs, looking around. At least I'm not hungry. I scroll on my phone. Dang these videos are extra boring today.

9 minutes later, it becomes VERY LOUD. Since all these people are here now, I suppose. But, one person stuck out to Pepper. A lady with purple hair, and talking to some pompous know-it-all looking ass bitch. Okay missy, don't be so quick to judge! She thought to herself, almost giggling. I mean, she is kinda pretty. "Hey, you, purple hair, what's your name?" Pepper called out.

The woman responded, "Hello there, I'm Candle, what's your name?"

Oh. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck this shit. WHY IS SHE HOT- Pepper. Calm down. "Oh, I'm Pepper, nice to meet ya! Salt would've introduced me to you but she's outta country. " I said, hoping I was acting normal.. Pepper, why are you such a wreck today!

"It's quite lovely to meet you, say, do you know any place we can escape this ruckus? It's so loud I can't even think! Also, may I please bring Silver with me? "

Pepper replied, "I mean, we could go to my room. Nobody is upstairs right now."

"Thank you, Pepper. Silver Spoon, come over here!" She called out, Silver Spoon just following behind Candle, they all went to Pepper's room.

"You guys can really just sit anywhere here, just don't go destroying everything, Soap worked really hard cleaning everything this morning." Pepper mentioned, hoping she hadn't over shared. Why is she so nervous today! Her stomach has been all weird and flutter-

Well, SHIT.

∩――――∩

|| ∧ ﾍ　 ||

|| (* ´ ｰ') ZZzz

|ﾉ^⌒⌒づ'￣＼

(　ノ　　⌒ ヽ＼

＼　　||￣￣￣￣￣||

　＼,ﾉ|| the end! For now. Wait for part 2.

Part 2:

(It's been what, 3 months since Pepper's has a crush on Candle? And it's driving Pepper crazy. She can't get an ounce of sleep, she has to shape her schedule around seeing her, gosh even Salt's getting suspicious! Nothing can spare her, can it? But, Pepper has a bigger hurdle in love once Candle develops a crush on Silver Spoon...)///

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚⋆｡𖦹˚.★*ੈ✩‧₊

Pepper's pov:

What do I do, yeah WHAT DO I DO! (A/N hah Rio Romeo lyrics anyways) Like, what DO I FUCKING DO! I'm helplessly in love with a girl who's definitely in love with a man! Story of my LIFE! First it was Salt, now it was Candle! Whatever, she got over Salt, if she tries hard enough she'll get over Candle, and they'll just be friends. Like it always turns out. Pepper, popular girl in high school and without a first anything. How embarrassing! Whatever, she'll just have to live with it. Her hands glide down the railings as she runs downstairs, grabbing a cereal bar for breakfast and filling her water bottle for breakfast. Just as quick as she came down, she ran outside, to a small meadow where there were lavender, daffodils, and little animals. It was where Candle meditated. And there she was, gorgeous as ever. She was the calmest entity in the entire universe it seemed, maintaining a straight face. "Hey Candle!" I greeted. "Do you mind if I like, join you?" I jad questioned, hiding my blush somewhat successfully.

"Oh, of course you can join." Candle answered. She was so thoughtful and kind and- gah Pepper you're here to meditate! Even if most of your meditation was just looking at her. "I actually have something I liked to tell you!" All Pepper needed to see was the look on Candle's face for her heart to break. Story of her life is right! "Me and Silver actually got together, I'm not sure you know, I've heard you've taken my advice and have stopped gossiping, it wasn't good for your mental health. " Candle would say. Pepper blushed a bit at the praise.

"Oh uhm, I'm happy for you two!" Pepper responded, hiding her shattered heart. God she just.. longed for Candle... Longed for her embrace, longed for her hugs, longed for her hand in hers as they sat in a tree, asking each other stupid questions.

It.

Was.

Over.

Pepper sure wasn't getting what she longed for, and nothing could fix that.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───⋆˚🐾˖°─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

End.

Now you have to wait for part 3 for their happy ending.

318 words in the story, 436 in total.

(ps, no. Part 3 WILL have no happy ending. You don't get it until 9art 236373774 because I felt like giving Pepper gay girl problems.)

One rrblog on this post and I'll post my candle x pepper story so far on here

#pepper ii #inanimate insanity #osc #ii candle #pepper x candle #bath spices ii

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cyclicalaberration · 3 years ago

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So, redstone is toxic and radioactive and requires ppe. That's pretty standard stuff. Which hermits follow guidelines is less standard stuff. So here is a non comprehensive list because as someone who has put uranium in my mouth, I'm qualified to talk on this. Please let me know who I'm forgetting if I forget anyone!

(I'm kinda treating this like resin or something, it's safe enough that people have it in their houses but you don't want to mess with it without gear, not like actual radiation. It's only radioactive if consumed or absorbed in some way)

Tangotek: 10/10, has a gas mask he wears when handing it, keeps all his skin covered, properly washes all materials and disposes is everything correctly

Keralis: does not work with redstone but when he does he is suited up, he's not getting irradiated today, no siree 10/10

Cub: proper mask, gloves and fully covered skin, he's up there with hermits with braincells, 9/10

Pearl: 10/10, she's very safe with redstone

Xisuma: 10/10, he can't inhale it if he tried, he doesn't have lungs his face is a television and he is a robot.

Zedaph: 10/10, full goggles and gas mask and proper protection, this is how you do it people

Impulse: he doesn't fully cover his skin but otherwise he is very well protected 9/10

Gem: 9/10, doesn't fully cover her skin but pants that cover deer legs are hard to find so she gets a pass.

Stress: 8/10, she slips up sometimes and will push up her goggles to rub her eyes but she's pretty safe!

Ren: 8/10, anyone looks like an angel next to doc. 2 points are docked for sheer amount of time spent near doc. Doc is a walking hazard.

Tfc: he's careful enough around redstone but he forgets goggles or gloves or something from time to time, 8/10

Iskall: 7/10, remembers to wear a mask and eye protection but forgets gloves often

Grian: wears a mask and gloves but doesn't cover his eyes and has dragged it around with his feathers on accident 6/10

Etho: 4/10. This man wears a mask. That is it. You are lucky if he hasn't rubbed it into his bad eye yet today.

Bdubs: 3/10, doesn't wear gloves or eye protection, accidentally rubs it into his eyes sometimes, does wear a mask to prevent inhalation.

False: 3/10 she handles it without a mask or eye protection and inhales it on the regular but she wears gloves.

Hypno: 3/10, covers his face with like, a cloth mask and nothing else.

Xb: 2/10, only wears gloves. Just gloves. No other protection.

Cleo: 2/10, while she can't be irradiated because she's already dead, she's setting a bad example

Joe: 2/10 he got redstone in his hair and in his food and accidentally poisoned himself and poured water on his redstone.

Scar: 2/10 he has never worn PPE ever and isn't going to start now, but he doesn't do redstone very often because he can just do magic.

Ijevin: 1/10, redstone gets stuck in and on him. He is a walking hazard. Can't get irradiated though.

Doc: 0/10 being a creeper does not protect you from radiation. Works with redstone shirtless. Rubbed it into his eyes. Has it in his body.

Mumbo: -12736462763/10 he eats redstone

#hermitcraft #hermitcraft headcanons #this is very long im sorry #all i do is nonsense

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sugarcherriess · 2 years ago

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omg you're taking requests!!! im way too obsessed w/ the thought of enemies-to-lovers Sangyeon ESPECIALLY if he's the one that ended up simping over you too much 😵‍💫 smut bcos I won't accept anything else (1/2 jk) congrats on the 1k followers!! YOU DESERVE IT

Thank you so much my darling and I hope you like it😋

Enemies To Lovers with Sangyeon:

cw - smut, whipped sangsang, but he’s also a pain in the ass, Sangyeon likes to be degraded by you, messy quick fuck that scrambles your hole, he has a strength kink.

Unlike my previous statement suggests, Sangyeon is not the only pain in the ass

You are a pain in his ass and his head too

Double kill!!!!

Both of you are COMPETITIVE competitive

You know each other through a mutual friend, lets say Jacob, the angel who just wants you to get along

And because Jacob adores you both

You get invited to the same activities a lot

But the same friend is also the reason you become enemies because???

“I’M THE FAVOURITE”

“NO ITS ME. IM THE FAVOURITE”

“YOU DONT EVEN KNOW JACOB’S FAVOURITE PORN TYPE!”

“YOU DONT KNOW THE SOUND OF HIS RETCHING WHEN HE’S HAD TOO MUCH TO DRINK!!”

Yeah.

You both always try to one up each other

Out drinking at a bar becomes riling each other up over who can down more shots without chasers

Playing basketball turns into pushing each other until your sides are bruised

Even the gym isn’t left alone as you both fight over who has more muscles and can bench press more

Movie nights have you quarrelling over your apparent shit tastes in entertainment

“You text like an ancient relic”

“At least people look forward to seeing ancient relics, you midseason allergy”

He talks a lot of shit for someone who’s becoming more and more impressed by the same competitiveness that used to tick him off before

One day you’re working in the kitchen and he comes in to get some juice or whatever

And you call him a mouthbreather out of nowhere

But instead of coming back with a “That insult went out of fashion in the 1900’s just like your chopping skills,”

He just laughs

Yk that heart, very Sangyeon-like laugh?

Yeah that one

And its so fuckin out if the ordinary that you spin around to face him

“Why are you laughing?”

“Cute,”

And thats the only thing he says

And it irritates the hell out of you

“What do you mean cute you gross piece of shit,”

And he’s just staring at you all starry eyed

“Did you get hit by a bus? I’m sure your last braincell died because you’re looking at me like a dead fish”

Notice how long the insult was??

Its because you were trying to hide how furiously your cheeks heated up at a single word

Cute. Who the fuck does he think he is? He probably meant it as an insult… so he thinks he’s better than me? This huge piece of horseshit!

This entire monologue goes on inside your head as your anger keeps overcoming your fluttery heart and Sangyeon stares at you like he just got an epiphany that yeah you’re the most adorable boiling pot he’s ever seen in his life

He giggles again and you break out of your stupor

“What are you laughing at?” You snap

He would lean against the fridge and you’d take it as a challenge

Striding towards him with purpose

You’d push him flat against the fridge and he lets himself be shoved

“Never call me cute again you fuckface,”

He’s looking at you with heart eyes

You don’t know but he’s been thinking about it hard lately

Thinking about when he started getting less angry at your bitchy attitude

And started following you around like a lovesick puppy provoking you so he can enjoy your furious eyes send daggers his way

Mans has a zero thoughts, head empty kinda moment

Caught up with your forearm pushing his neck into the huge food container machine

He swallows his inhibitions and kisses you

Mouth to mouth

It ends in a flash

But you feel the weight of his lips against yours so well

“What the fuck is wrong with you today how dare you kiss me-“

To the surprise of all the stars in the sky and Sangyeon and you yourself, you cut your own self off

By pulling his collar and kissing him properly

You tug at his lips with your teeth as you pull him to crowd you against the counter

You jump on it yourself

“You’re so useless,”

Sangyeon grinds his chubbed up cock in between your open legs caging him in

Your nails scratch his pelvis as you messily try to get his cock out of his sweats

And he quickly gets your lower half naked

He has no time at the glorious image displayed for his eyes to stare at unfortunately

Because you’re hooking your legs over his arms, scooting over the edge and dragging his cock to your hole

His huge cock

His damn thickness

You make sure trace the outside of your entrance with his massive cock to tease him🫶🏼

And then you shove it in yourself

You try to set the pace too by holding his waist and pulling him to you

But something snaps in him

And he grabs the back of your thighs

Pushing them all the way back to fold you like a pretzel

And sets a brutal pace enough to bruise your insides

His cock shoves roughly into you, uncaring of your quickly bruising skin

His balls would slap so hard against your skin that he would actually consider going slow

But the way you’re panting and groaning into his chest makes him rethink

It wouldn’t be too far off to imagine him sliding you off the counter at one point and bouncing you ok his cock mid air

He likes having you lose control like this

No matter how much he likes getting degraded by you as well

Your orgasm hits you hard and explodes all over his shirt

And he shoves you to the counter, back pressed flat against against it

His hands on your chest keeping you pressed there as he ruts into you like crazy and empties himself on your abdomen.

“I guess this is one way to get along,”

Poor Jacob

But you do get along after that

Because when Sangyeon confessed that he’s started to like you a lot

Your rolling eyes couldn’t do jack shit to hide your smile

Even if you promise yourself you don’t feel the same way

You too start liking his annoying banter a few after-sex cuddling sessions later

#˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ Adonis Speaks #the boyz imagines #sangyeon smut #Sangyeon scenarios #the boyz smut #Sangyeon hard hours #the boyz scenarios #the boyz hard hours #tbz smut #tbz scenarios #tbz hard hours

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katronautt · 3 years ago

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KAT'S YEAR REVIEW & A THANK YOU NOTE

hello my lovelies! we reached the end of this year (thank god) and i have a few things to say and a lot to thank for you guys.

(i promise that the rest of my writing is not in this font lol)

this year sucked. bigtime. everyone was all over 2020, how bad it was and all but lemme tell you, 2021 wasn't that much better either. first half of this year was spent with struggling trying to find a job while spiraling down into the rabbit hole of self-pity and depression. finally in may (after 8 months of searching), i got accepted to a place that wasn't (and isn't) any better than what I had left behind in 2020. still, it is somewhat better and i least i have a monthly income for now.

but i still very much like to move on to something else in 2022 so here is the first thing im hoping for next year: a good job with a good salary, something i enjoy doing. (huh good luck you dumb biatch lol)

so all in all, i hated this year but!! there are a few things that made is somewhat bareable and it is all thanks to you guys! (here comes the soppy part so buckle up)

i (re)discovered the world of fanfiction throughout the pedro fandom sometime in november, 2020. i have all that time in my hands since i didnt have a job and i got really into it. ever since then, i find it hard at nights to go to sleep without reading anything before it (kinda became a tradition of mine if you will) and during the winter, reading fanfics helped me tremendously. they helped me escape from my miserable, jobless, futureless and lonely af life and they helped me get through the day. they brought me joy, sometimes tears in a good way and i caught myself staying up til 2 or 3 just to read "one more" chapter of a certain fic.

i still cant believe you guys are doing this for free, for our entertainment (and yours) ! sharing your wonderful works with us and expecting nothing in return (except for the obviously well deserved likes & reblogs) is truly a wonder i never be able to comprehend!

tumblr is truly a hellsite, it gave me so much anxiety since i joined back in actively yet... tumblr is also that thing that gave me the most joy this year with y'all in it.

and now for the thank you notes:

⭐ yes of course im starting with my dearest, my love, my one braincell, @queenofthefaceless. ari, you were one of the first 'big' blogs that started following me after i started making gifs again and i was all over and back and that support still holds up til today. thank you for your neverending support and for always being there for me, no matter what. ilysm. 💜

⭐ although we dont speak much lately, @keethus-arts I ll never forget your support and nice words whenever i was feeling down. thank you keeth! 💜

⭐ when @ithinkhesgaybutwesavedmufasa started following me, i was just about to go to bed around 2 am, but when i saw the notification i got so excited that i couldnt sleep for another half an hour and then the next morning i checked in there again to see if i wasnt dreaming. for a while i was intimidated by Katryn for some stupid reason (you know big blog with amazing and popular fics and all) but honestly she's the absolute sweetest and I'm so glad I got to meet you! You have such amazing & wonderful stories! i also wanna thank you for your infinite support towards my maxie gifs and towards my other works too💜

⭐ the same happened with @qveenbvtch, i was (and am) so in love with her javi series, i never thought that such a big and amazing (and intimidating) writer would ever talk to me, let alone follow me but she is also one of the sweetest person i've ever met here and i hope she is doing alright and having a nice holidays wherever she is right now 💜

⭐ @mandocrasis birdie, you know this by now but i found you and your blog through your mind blowing fic interruption which is probably something i will never shut up about, but through that smutty one piece i got to meet a wonderful person with wonderful stories & i thank you for your never fading support towards me and my gifs 💜

⭐ @asta-lily lil beans, although you are not that active anymore on tumblr (which i hope will change one day), you were one of the first people i became mutuals with and i was lucky enough too meet the sweetest, loveliest person in you. and your AOJ story forever remains dear to my heart 💜

⭐ sweet, sweet @anaaaispunk ! the first thing i read from you was the first chapter of your crazy in love series (during my summer holiday, on a beach, with people all around me... ) i was instantly blown away and sweating (and not just from the hot wheater 🤭), I just knew I had to follow you for more haha. but this way I got to meet another sweet soul of tumblr with an amazing writing talent. thank you for all the love and support you have shown towards me and my gifs 💜

⭐ MEG! i feel like i am so lucky for finding your soft max lord series, it seriously changed my life, i fell in love with the story, with max, the whole thing.. and when you dedicated your latest chapter to me with that sweet note, i felt like i could cry, because honestly, one of the best thing that happened to me lately haha. you are an absolute angel and dont you forget that @perropascal !! 💜

⭐ and i also wanna mention and say thanks to @babydarkstar! Your ezra story had blown me the fuck away, seriously, its amazing, wonderful and beautiful.. just like you anya, thank you for support and your amazingness! 💜

Alrighty, i talk way too fucking much so im just gonna tag the rest of y'all to whom i say a massive thanks because without your amazing fics i dont think i would have survived this year ( i know with some of you we are not mutuals but that doesnt stop me from loving your works):

@absurdthirst, @toomanystoriessolittletime, @storiesofthefandomlovers, @honestly-shite, @littlemisspascal, @radiowallet, @queridopascal, @just-here-for-the-moment, @softpedropascal , @javier-pena, @f0rever15elf, @danidrabbles, @lellowberry, @pedro-pascal-love, @foli-vora, @krissology @frannyzooey, @starlightmornings, @wordsnwhiskey, @juletheghoul, @dincrypt, @mandosmistress, @yespolkadotkitty, @songsformonkeys, @the-ginger-hedge-witch, @astroboots, @brandyllyn, @charnelhouse , @ezrasbirdie , @novemberrain221, @oonajaeadira

And to every other lovely mutuals I am lucky enough to have: without your support I'd be nowhere. Love y'all tremendously 💋❤️❤️

@beskarboobs, @300mirrors, @over300books, @artsymaddie, @phantomviola, @djarsdin, @sirtadcooper , @lucrezia-thoughts, @wild-at-heart-kept-in-cage

Here's to another shitty AMAZING year with you guys on this hellsite!! 🥂🎉❤️❤️❤️❤️

#kat stuff #soppy post #pls excuse me while I cry in the corner from all the memories that started flooding back #happy new year 🥂💞#I hope I didn't miss out anyone

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mrpenguinpants · 4 years ago

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Genshin: University AU [V1]

I love modern au. Or any “everything is fine, no one died, it’s just a fever dream” au. Half of me is thinking, damn maybe I should answer this serious- LOL HAHA no. That’s not happening. Time to crack my knuckles and let my brainworms take over again.

Once again, this is 90% crack 10% content. I want to switch up my characters from the last brainworm post but I included Kaeya and Diluc.

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Today’s appreciation post goes to twistedwishes. Hey! I’ve been seeing you pop up a lot lately and thanks for the support 💕💕 I hope things are going better for you and you’re doing alright^^ I feel kinda bad for making appreciation posts on crack fics but hopefully this is somewhat funny haha.

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Genshin: Holding Hands [V1]

Genshin: When you’re cold [V1]

Genshin: Roommate [V1]

Genshin: Royalty AU [V1]

[Masterlist]

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[taglist] <- if you want to be added, please read this first.

@mikeysbike @hanniejji@unionwitch @musekala @twistedsunnshiii @stanzastic @akaasea @xoneaboveallx @adoring-ghost @asheseiler @childelover @dilucsz @dai-tsukki-desu @thicmitten @youaskedfurret @diaxfeliz @wintergreen-aix @dandelily @thegayrubberducky @lovelykittycatmeow @yuunoagivesmelife @dokidokisama @simpygrimoire @minakohasmanyhusbandos @strwbrry-lia @tigerpriestess @yuu-yuukurotsuki

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Diluc

Absolute pretty boy who has braincells, but only if Kaeya is not there. In his mind, Kaeya’s presence makes his room loose 40% of their common sense. He can’t prove it just yet but he’s working on it. He majors in accounting but also has a minor in marketing, logistics’ management, fia- he majors everything business related. He’s going to become the next Elon Musk through smarts or by getting the competition drunk. There can be no contest if he’s the only candidate. He’s actually a hard working guy that overworks and stresses way too much. You have daily “Diluc recharge” evenings where he just hangs onto you while you go through your day.

“Don’t fucking talk to me until I’ve had my coffee,” except there is no coffee - he drinks grape juice out of juice boxes and his only energy boost is when he meets up with you - and that’s his constant mood. So he usually only hangs around you and Jean, since she has childhood friend status and is actually an angel. By default, Lisa is added and Diluc doesn’t mind her but if he see’s Kaeya, it’s full on war paint mode. If he's not busy with work or studies, he's usually with you either in your dorm or his apartment.

He has a fanclub and he seriously hates it and tries to do everything in his power to get Ningguang to take it down. Shouldn’t this be against his rights? But she refuses for whatever reason and makes a whole speech about free will. No matter what he does, someone manages to take a picture and it get’s printed in the university’s newspaper. The only bonding time he has with Kaeya is every Monday, where they collect and burn all the universities newspapers before anyone can get their hands on it. You always bring marshmallows to make smores during their arson activities.

“When I graduate I’m going to burn this school down to the ground. That’s not a threat it’s a promise.”

Ningguang

Is secretly the leader of the Diluc fanclub - not that she likes Diluc, she’s in a questionable platonic poly marriage with you and Beidou - but it was the easiest way to gain funds for the student council. Which she is the president of, so rip Diluc the fanclub stays. Ruthless business woman I tell you. But she can run in heels so her danger factor rises by at least 20%.

Majors in social sciences and law but more specifically the political science & government. She saw the Imperial State Crown that the Queen of England wears and says yes, that’s mine now. If she’s not with Beidou and you planning on “how to infiltrate the state government just for lols”, then she’s with Keqing, Ganyu, and Zhongli discussing student council things. Should they or should they not tell the student body that they can see everyone’s search results? Sit back and relax as the school goes into chaos.

She’s probably the scariest person on campus No, she is the scariest person on campus. She’s the scariest person on campus. But secretly she’s popping 20 aspirins just to make it through a night. She has the digestive system of steel. She still holds the title of "seriously do not try and beat her in a drinking game it's never going to happen" and that's her proudest achievement in life but sadly she can’t put it on her resume. Kaeya is still trying to beat her out of spite but so far it hasn't been working. You’re seriously concerned for her when she get’s challenged but Beidou gives you a way-to-hard slap on the back and cheers her on. If Ninngguang somehow get’s alcohol poisonings she’ll somehow find away to make a profit out of it.

"I'll let him die, I'll get the insurance money."

Kaeya

One day he chugged too much mouth wash, passed out, and somehow woke up in university majoring in law. His idea is that if he is apart of the law, he can therefore stand above it. To be fair, his only goal in life is to say “I am the manager” and he can go live the rest of his life in bliss or as a hermit. He’s secret best friends with you but wouldn't be caught dead beside you. He will stab a bitch if you ever get hurt but will still trip you on the way home. Seriously, you have no idea why people find him attractive. Your guess is it’s the eye patch or the clap of his ass cheeks that keeps alerting everyone.

He’s apart of the newspaper club and if anyone asks: No, he has no idea who keeps taking all the newspapers and burns them in the back of the campus. Originally, he joined because he was nosy and needed to join some type of club for his resume. He sometimes feels bad for his junior assistant Amber because he keeps tricking her and says that Diluc is secretly a demon that is trying to steal all the jobs and is apart of the lizard government hell bent on eradicating the human race. He even brought out a whiteboard for this joke, he’s dedicated to his job ok?

The type of guy to try and be humble and say his work is “okay” but will choke a bitch if anyone agrees. He tends to leave everything last minute and says that it’s his drug since actual drugs could land you one year in prison and a maximum penalty of $2,000. You have to awkwardly hold in your concerned mother head shake when you see him speed running his assignment literally right when the professor is walking around to check if students finished.

“I was taught how to lead not to read.”

Mona

Broke wallet #2. Zhongli is broke wallet #1 but Childe simps for him so is he really a broke wallet at this point? In this essay, I Mona Megistus, will explain why I have the rights to the title “Broke Wallet #1″...

Believes that astrology should be an actual career path but refuses to take astronomy as her major. I can read the stars not a textbook that tells me how to calculate the mass of the sun divided by the fucks I give. Instead she went into Philosophy and cries to Albedo, who is an actual prodigy genius- sir lend some braincells to everyone else please?, that her professor keep turning her paper down because “star reading” is not an academic source.

Fischl wants her to join the occult club because, surprisingly, Mona is very good at telling people’s fates through her crayon sketch ouija board. She thinks first year Fischl is cute but is put off by the cosplay roleplay that she has going on. She would join except that stupid hat wearing gremlin in her lit class would make fun of her if he found out.

You gave her half your lunch one day and bought her a doughnut "because she seemed upset" and "out of the goodness of your heart" whatever the hell that means. She thinks you pensioned it but once that thought comes she takes a bite. Poison from a doughnut is not the worst way to go out, classes are hard enough. She’s waiting for the lord to strike her down anyways.

“Its not about passing, its about doing better than everyone else.”

Venti

Slept through most of highschool and people question how he got into university. He’s a music major (wow how fucking original is that), and if anyone asks him to serenade someone or just do anything, he’ll do it for the right price. Or if you buy him alcohol because he still keeps getting ID checked. He’s banking on Kaeya actually becoming a lawyer or being on good terms with Diluc so he can finally stop being arrested for looking like a toddler.

Takes one step into classes and quickly nopes out and goes back to bed. Professors have no idea how he hasn't dropped out or failed. He just has some god given talent. He does whine at you to pretty pretty please with a cherry on top tutor him because you're such an angel and would never leave your poor but awesome best friend hanging right? He needs to get this essay down but how he is suppose to explain how the number 10 is symbolic and connects to the universe or the meaning of life. Do you think he can just say it’s apart of his culture and make up some random myth to pretend it looks like he knows what he’s doing?

He’s honestly going with the flow and put his brain on the back burner all of highschool and only now realizes wait, I actually have to use my brain?

He’s been banned from most club chats since Venti has the no chill card. Someone says “lol I look ugly today.” and he’ll respond "yup, you look like a cow." and he get’s banned. Zhongli keeps a speed run timer on his phone just to document these occasions.

"Sad spelled backwards is das and das how it be sometimes."

Childe

An actual dumbass that somehow does well. He eats sandwiches with the crust off, this heathen. Surprisingly he’s studying to become a physical therapist but most of his experience has come from breaking his own bones. You’re scared how he's going to be if he actually becomes a therapist. If he'll make bets with his patients or try to one up whatever crazy injury they get into. Everything is a challenge to him that sometimes the best way to deal with Childe is to knock him out.

This man really knows the way to a Zhongli’s woman's heart. Through micro transactions. Mona saw him accidently drop $20 and just shrugged and walked off. She has never been both spiritually and physically offended in her life. She did take the $20 though. As much as you hate leeching on Chile when he’s basically a walking wallet that probably uses bills as tissue paper, you can’t help but give him puppy eyes while planning on how to get into his will. If he even plans on having one, he might honestly write “whoever wins in a gladiator style duel in my funeral’s tournament, they will get my fortune.”.

Any sport the university offers Childe is probably in it. Which is how he met Zhongli, challenged him to a fight, proceeded to have his ass handed to him, got a backhanded compliment, and screamed to you he was in love and how he found his soulmate. He's secretly very sappy and has cried and watched every Disney and Pixar movie at least 28 times.

"IM NOT TOO SPICY! I’M A TINY BIT ABOVE MILD IF ANYTHING!”

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God if it isn’t Scaramouche, it’s Childe that ruins the aesthetic. This is why I hate you. Why do you people enable me like this, it isn’t even good. This is pretty much a @ yourself moment and I vibe hard with Venti. This entire post was just to make a joke about the clap of Kaeya’s ass cheeks alerting the guards.

This week might slow down since I have classes and assignments. My reply’s are gonna be late too, sorry;; (oh and thank you to everyone that was so supportive and nice when I mentioned it. All of you. Beautiful 💕💕 )

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