#Mr. Grinch ♪
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♪ You're a rotter, Mr. Grinch
You're the king of sinful sots
Your heart's a dead tomato splotched with moldy purple spots, Mr. Grinch ♪
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#♪ You're a rotter#Mr. Grinch#You're the king of sinful sots#Your heart's a dead tomato splotched with moldy purple spots#Mr. Grinch ♪#LemonitesArt#Springtrap#PillarChase2#PillarChase#FNaF#Grinch#Grinchtrap#five nights at freddy's#pillar chase 2#digital art#pillar chase
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For my depiction of Background Singer as Oogie Boogie Background Singer, I thought Oogie Boogie's theme song from "The Nightmare Before Christmas" could be covered by my OC not surprisingly. In fact, for how I would make my own version of the episode, "A Christmas Plotz", Oogie Boogie Background Singer makes his debut after Wakko disappears. Babes Bunny I thought would be depicted as a vulture with a Thurl Ravenscroft voice. Earlier, the vulture would've sung "You're a Mean One, Mr. Plotz" (a cover of "You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch", no less) just before Wakko sings his Ghost of Christmas Past song. Babes would still stick around when Background Singer appears as Oogie Boogie Background Singer.
And since this whole episode is suppose to be a nightmare like the original "Christmas Carol" story is depicted as, Dot as the Ghost of Christmas Present is the wife of Oogie Boogie Background Singer. For their first appearance, after the CEO finds another present on his desk and pulls the tag off, ghouls and demons fly out of it and have Mr. Plotz's hands tied behind his chair. And down below are the lyrics for Oogie Boogie Background Singer singing his theme song.
[LYRICS]
(As soon as Mr. Plotz unties the ribbon, an instrumental plays for 14 seconds while dark magic covers the whole office. Then on a trumpet blare, Dot and Oogie pop out of the box.)
Dot (Mad): Who are you calling a fruitcake? (Turns visible)
Oogie Boogie Background Singer: (Steps out of the box) Well, well, well! What have we here? Mr. Plotz, huh? OH! I'm really scared! So you're the one everyone's been hating for so long! (Evilly laughs and starts to speak to the music)
Oogie Boogie Background Singer (Spoken): ♪You're joking! You're joking! I can't believe me eyes!♪
♪You're joking me, you've gotta be! This can't be the right guy!♪
He's ancient!
Oogie Boogie Background Singer (Deep voice): He's ugly!
Oogie Boogie Background Singer (Normal voice): I don't know which is worse! I might just split a seam now if I don't die laughing first!
♪Mister Oogie Boogie says there's trouble close at hand. (Grabs Mr. Plotz by his chest and lifts him up to his height)♪
Oogie Boogie Background Singer (Mad) (Spoken): ♪YOU BETTER PAY ATTENTION NOW! 'Cause I'm the Boogie Man!♪
Oogie Boogie Background Singer (Sung): ♪And if you aren't shaking, there's something very wrong!♪
♪'Cause this may be the last time, you hear the Boogie song. (Turns to his demons) Whoa!♪
Demons: ♪Whoa!♪
Oogie Boogie Background Singer: ♪Whoa! (Opens a box, unleashing Dot's pets.)♪
Dot's pets: ♪Whoa!♪
Oogie Boogie Background Singer: ♪Whoa!♪
High-Pitched Vultures: ♪Whoa!♪
Oogie Boogie Background Singer, Dot, and his army: ♪I'm/He's the Oogie Boogie Man!♪
Oogie Boogie Background Singer (Spoken): ♪Well, if I'm feeling ANTSY (When Oogie yells "ANTSY!", ants fly out of his mouth and land on Mr. Plotz' face.) and I've nothing much to do, I might just cook a special batch of Snake and Spider Stew!♪
♪And don't you know the one thing, that would make it work so nice A roly-poly Mr. Plotz to add a little SPICE!♪
Dot, Oogie's Henchmen, and Vultures: ♪Whoa!♪
Oogie Boogie Background Singer (Sung): ♪Whoa!♪
Dot, Oogie's Henchmen, and Vultures: ♪Whoa!♪
(Oogie Boogie Background Singer evilly laughs)
♪Whoa!♪
Oogie Boogie Background Singer: Yeah.
Oogie Boogie Background Singer, Dot, and his army: ♪I'm/He's the Oogie Boogie Man!♪
Mr. Plotz (Mad) (Spoken): ♪Release me now, or you will face the dire consequences!♪
♪The Warners are expecting me, so please! Come to your senses!♪
Oogie Boogie Background Singer (Spoken): ♪You're joking! You're joking! I can't believe me ears! (Spins Mr. Plotz around)♪
♪Will someone shut this follow up? (Kicks him to the floor)♪
♪I'm drowning in my tears!♪
♪It's funny! I'm laughing! You really are too much!♪
And now with your permission, I'm going to do my stuff.
Mr. Plotz (Scared): Wha-what are you going to do?
Oogie Boogie Background Singer: I'm gonna do the best I can.
(During the jazzy instrumental, Dot steps out of the box to introduce herself.)
Dot: I'm the Ghost of Christmas Present. It’s a pun. Get it?
Vulture: Ha! Yes!
Oogie Boogie Background Singer (Sung): ♪WHOA! The sounds of rolling dice to me is music in the air! (Throws five dice blocks onto the floor, four of which reveal Mr. Plotz' face.)♪
Oogie Boogie Background Singer (Spoken): ♪'Cause I'm a gambling Boogie man, although I don't play fair!♪
(Oogie pours the dice back in the cup, and magically pulls out a long chain.)
Oogie Boogie Background Singer (Sung): ♪It's much more fun, I must confess, when lives are on the line! (Throws the chain at Mr. Plotz, tying him up.)♪
Oogie Boogie Background Singer (Spoken): ♪Not mine, of course. But yours, old boy! Now that'd be just fine!♪
Mr. Plotz (Spoken): ♪Release me fast, or you will have to answer for this heinous act!♪
Oogie Boogie Background Singer (Spoken): ♪Oh brother! You're something! You put me in a spin! (Pulls the chain, and spins Mr. Plotz around.)♪
♪But you aren't comprehending, the position that you're in!♪
(Oogie's demons and Dot's pets surround Mr. Plotz and slowly walk closer to him from all angles)
Oogie Boogie Background Singer (Spoken) (Off-screen): ♪It's hopeless! You're finished! And you haven't got a prayer!♪
Oogie Boogie Background Singer (Spoken) (On-screen): ♪(Opens his folded wings that say "OOGIE" on each wing) Because I'm "Mr. Oogie Boogie", and you ain't going nowhere. (Evilly laughs and turns to his wife)♪
Let's finishhh him off.
(Just then, bouncy upbeat music begins to play, with Dot and Oogie dancing while holding hands.)
Oogie Boogie Background Singer and Dot: ♪Thaddeus Plotz, you mean old man! Causing pain wherever you can, it's all about to hit the fan, you greedy C.E.O.!♪
♪You're guilty in the first degree of causing pain and misery!♪
(Dot and Oogie throw Mr. Plotz in the box and Dot dives in after him)
♪Now it's time for you to see, so hang on, here we go!♪♪
Oogie Boogie Background Singer (On the final note of the music): Hey! (Oogie flies into the box)
#meme template#music based#singing together#Animaniacs#Animaniacs OC#Oogie Boogie Background Singer#Oogie Boogie Background Singer (Animaniacs OC)#Dot Warner#Mr. Plotz#Thaddeus Plotz#my oc#self insert#colored pencil art#pencil art#my art#scenarios#musical scenario#cover song#song lyrics#A Christmas Plotz#From “A Christmas Plotz”#the nightmare before christmas#Oogie Boogie Song#The Oogie Boogie Song
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AMBITION Season 2 ♫ “How the Twinks Saved Christmas” [ Special ]
CREATED BY Esther (rapunzles) & Maggie (quincywillows) || S2 Tag || Official Page
THE THINGS WE HAVE TO DO – Asher and Dylan attempt to pull together the usual techie tradition when their commanders in chief are unable. One has to wonder how far a couple of loyal lieutenants will go for their best friend.
51 Minutes (10.5K words) || No warnings apply.
[ ← Cold Comfort ] [ S2 Synopsis ] [ Trapped → ]
( Follow along with the music on Spotify here! )
INT. LUCAS’S APARTMENT - NIGHT
We’re back at the end of 2.05, the techies flooding into the apartment to surprise LUCAS FRIAR for the holiday. He watches them all in shock before turning back to find ASHER GARCIA and DYLAN ORLANDO in the doorway, giving him smug smiles.
Dylan: Greetings, Mr. Grinch.
The scene proceeds as we saw it the first time, but subtle differences in the camera angles and costuming shine a little more light on the status of Asher and Dylan.
For being so put together in the execution of their holiday rescue, they’re a bit ragged in their appearance. Asher’s hair is a mess, which is a rare occurrence. Dylan’s cheeks are rosier than usual. They look like they’ve taken more than one trek through the winter sludge outside.
When they step forward to pull Lucas into their sandwich hug, the screen suddenly freezes on the sweet vignette. Very much a record scratch moment. Then, some familiar voices voice over the warm imagery:
Dylan: Aw, look at that. It’s so cute. Aren’t we cute?
Asher: Well, maybe one of us.
Dylan: Ignoring that. But you may have points with dad there.
Asher: He’s looked better.
Dylan: Sure he’s felt better, too.
Dissection of Lucas aside, Asher goes on to explain how this all makes everything seem so easy. Clicking back a couple of frames to their arrival, he points out how it really just seems like they just appeared out of thin air and brought the holiday cheer.
Although it’s a good part of the story, it’s certainly not the full story. And this doesn’t give nearly enough credit to how far from easy this whole thing was. Or, to the point, any credit to how the whole thing came together at all. Where it all started.
Then, the frames begin moving backwards in time, so fast that they’re hardly discernible. There are fleeting glimpses of moments -- Asher and Dylan dashing through the snow, the exterior of AAA in the glow of a wintery night, a Christmas tree farm…
EXT. AAA - DAY
Until we’re back outside AAA, the same day that Lucas stormed out early. On the precipice of winter break.
Asher: If you’re going to get the full story, then we’re going to have to go back to the start.
Dylan: Twas the day before winter break…
Time resumes on the frame of AAA, easing in towards the school as students begin disembarking for the end of term.
INT. AAA - AUDITORIUM - DAY
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Please Come Home For Christmas” as performed by Kelly Clarkson || Instrumental
The techie crew isn’t going anywhere, not yet. The mood is deflated as the group of them gather in the auditorium, sitting on the stage like usual but not quite feeling like a cohort.
NATE MARTINEZ sits on one of the acting blocks, bouncing and catching a bouncy ball listlessly. JEFF MONROE reclines in a folding chair, leg bouncing restlessly. DAVE WILLIAMS is sprawled on the floor, staring up at the catwalk. JADE BEAMON is finishing some last minute seams on a costume, pin in her mouth as she glances up to listen to the discussion.
That discussion is being led by Asher, Dylan faithfully at his side with the rolling whiteboard. The two of them are attempting to brainstorm other ways the group of them could ring in the holiday spirit, since their techie tradition seems to have fallen through.
Seeing how the whiteboard only has a couple of half-hearted, random words written on it, it’s clear they’re not making much progress. Dylan has moved on to doodling tiny versions of all of them, more focused on that than the brainstorming.
Still, Asher isn’t giving up. He’s the only one actively putting in an effort, pacing as he racks his brain for a solution.
Asher: What about Chubbie’s? We could do family dinner there.
Jeff: Closed for the holidays. Won’t be open from tomorrow to the 26th.
Asher: Okay… oh, well, what about Svorski’s? Maybe she’d let us host something. I’m pretty sure she’s Jewish, right?
Jade: Can’t. We’re not allowed back ever since Dave’s incident with the pastila.
Dave: Look, I said I was sorry!
Clearly, this is going nowhere. Nate is the first to say so, gathering his things and getting ready to head out. The others take this as a cue, also getting ready to go. Dylan is pulled out of his drawing by the commotion (just finishing up a little heart next to his miniature Asher), realizing this is not going as planned.
Asher tries to get them all to hold up, just spend a little more time thinking of something, but the consensus seems to be that there’s no point.
Nate: Look, I get what you guys are trying to do. And it’s great, it’s beautiful that you still believe in the “power of friendship” or whatever, when this school was clearly forsaken and cast away to Hell ages ago.
Dylan: [ re: Hell ] You say that like it’s a bad thing...
Nate: But look around. Lucas and Smackle aren’t even here.
Jeff: Isa’s got her new crew now, she probably won’t even notice if the get together is dead.
Nate: We have no way to get into the school without Friar, and to be honest, what’s the point if he’s not going to be there?
Dave, sadly: Won’t be the same without Lucas.
Dave’s favoritism aside, he has a point. Asher searches for something to say, but comes up short. It’s not right, he knows it isn’t, but he can’t figure out how to fix it.
Nate tosses them a peace, telling them he’ll catch them in the new year. Jeff follows him out, then Dave, leaving only Jade behind as she finishes putting away the costuming supplies. Dylan steps forward to comfort Asher, patting his shoulder as Jade addresses them.
Jade: I think it’s really sweet, what you’re trying to do. I wish it would work, too. I wish there was a simple solution.
[ Asher can tell there’s a ‘but’ coming. Dylan looks at him, somber. ]
Jade: But I don’t know… maybe some things aren’t meant to last. Maybe sometimes… things just fall apart.
She steps forward to give both of them hugs, giving Asher a kiss on the cheek and wishing them both happy holidays. Then she heads out, leaving them alone on the empty stage.
Asher sighs, turning and actually looking at the whiteboard for the first time. He gives Dylan a look, somewhere between endeared and confused.
Asher: Is that supposed to be us?
Dylan: [ with a shrug ] It’s a work in progress.
INT. GARCIA HOME - ASHER’S ROOM - NIGHT
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Mom Returns And Finale” as scored by John Williams for Home Alone || Instrumental (00:45 - 2:00)
That night, Asher is putting away his school things for the break. He takes a moment to edit his agenda, settling down at his desk and cross-checking the dates in his notebook with the ones on his wall calendar.
He hesitates when he gets to the scheduled date for the techie holiday party, originally set for tomorrow evening. He grabs a pen and begins to scratch it off his schedule… but he can’t bring himself to do it. The pen is hovering over the date on the calendar, but he can’t bring himself to pull the trigger and cross it out for good.
He gets distracted instead by a photo tucked behind the calendar, pushing it to the side a bit so he can get a better look. It’s a polaroid of him, Dylan, and Lucas, taken sometime the previous year. The two of them are all smiles, and even Lucas is cracking a smirk.
Even in photo form, the amount of love that exists between the three of them radiates. Asher takes the picture down from the board and holds it in his hands, obviously feeling sentimental. Remembering a time when things felt easier, torn up over what a mess things have become.
Asher, softly: Maybe some things aren’t meant to last…
Just as he’s contemplating this grim potential, a noise outside his window startles him. He glances at his clock and the late hour, eyes wide towards the window pane when another scrape sounds from just outside. It seems to be getting closer.
Asher edges closer to his window, a distinct sense of unease dominating the scene. He closes his eyes, shaking his head.
Asher: Please don’t be a holiday ghost, please don’t be a holiday ghost…
Mustering up his courage, he pushes open his window. For a second, there’s nothing… then Dylan pops his head up, scaring the hell out of Asher.
He’s out of breath, the climb up to his window being particularly difficult given the winter weather. He props his elbow on the window pane, catching his breath and giving him a grin.
Dylan: Evenin’, lover.
Asher sighs, helping him up and pulling him in through the window. He questions what the hell he’s doing out in this weather, let alone trying to climb around his house. Although he does it pretty frequently, testing his luck when everything is so icy seems like an ill-advised move.
Once he regains his bearings and shrugs off his winter coat, Dylan explains why he came. He can’t stop thinking about the holiday party, and the way they left things at school today. Everyone seemed so bummed, and it’s been plaguing him all afternoon. He continues on this thought train until he gets distracted by the neatly wrapped gift sitting on Asher’s wardrobe, addressed for him. He gets excited about that until Asher lightly smacks his hand away, reminding him that Christmas is in two days and he can surely wait until then.
Maybe so, but it’s so difficult to see Dylan Orlando pout. Asher caves somewhat, allowing him to eat the candy cane stuck to the outside of it early.
Dylan continues his explanation as he unwraps the candy cane, torn between eating it like a normal person and waving it around for emphasis. Now more than ever, he states, the crew of them should be banding together in spite of all the tension at school rather than just letting things fall apart.
Asher agrees, but he doesn’t know what they’re supposed to do about it. He tried to fix it earlier, and that crashed and burned. They were both there. This is where Dylan steps up, claiming that he might actually have the solution.
He hands Asher his candy cane to hold and proceeds to dig through his jacket pockets. Of course, he pulls out an assortment of things that aren’t what he’s looking for.
Dylan: [ pulling out a wrinkled receipt ] No, that’s not it. Oh, wait, I think I was supposed to return these actually --
[ Asher pops the candy cane in his mouth without thinking, waiting for him to find it. ]
Dylan: [ pulling out a used tissue ] Ew, well, haha, that’s not it --
As he’s about to simply put the tissue back in his pocket, Asher gags and shakes his head. He tells him to give it to him, Dylan obeying and passing it over. Asher holds it daintily, barely hiding his disgust as he quickly tosses it into the trash can.
Dylan: [ pulling out a movie ticket stub ] Oh, this is from Detective Pikachu! You remember when we saw that? We should totally get that when it comes out on digital download --
Asher: Dylan. Dyl. Lighthouse, bring it home.
Dylan: Right, right.
Dylan finally manages to retrieve what he’s looking for, a folded up piece of lined paper. He holds it up in his fingers proudly.
Dylan: Isa made a list.
As he goes on to explain, when Riley helped them set up the holiday party last year, Isadora made a step-by-step list of all the items that go into preparing their tradition. He also still has the grocery list from when the two of them helped with that task last year. All they have to do is complete all the preparations, and then they’ll bring the tradition to Lucas.
Not a bad idea. Asher definitely seems intrigued as he swaps out the candy cane for the list, looking it over. But he’s always been the detail-oriented one to Dylan’s big ideas, so he naturally has questions. Firstly, the elephant in the room.
Asher: What about Lucas’s dad? We’re hardly allowed over to his place as it is, if we showed up with all this when his dad was around he would freak.
Dylan: I thought about that, too. But then I remembered how he was complaining during Thanksgiving about his holiday plans getting swapped around. Originally his dad was going to be here for the winter holidays and not Thanksgiving, but then it got changed. Remember?
That’s one potential road block out of the way. Asher asks about money, as the endeavor to pull this thing off is usually a group effort. Dylan states that if they let the other techies know their plan, he’s sure they’ll chip in and help in whatever way they can. As for decorations, Dylan points out that they saved the ones they made from last year, so all they have to do is retrieve the old ones rather than make a ton of new ones.
Asher is warming up to the idea, but one glaring question still remains.
Asher: Do you really think we can pull this off in a day? The party was supposed to be tomorrow night. You actually think you and I can do this on our own.
Dylan: That, my dear --
[ Dylan grabs his duffle bag from underneath his heavy coat, dropping it onto the bed for emphasis. ]
Dylan: Is why I’m sleeping over. We’ve got an early start tomorrow!
So it’s settled. Dylan and Asher are going to save Christmas.
INT. GARCIA HOME - ASHER’S ROOM - DAY
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Setting the Trap” as scored by John Williams for Home Alone || Instrumental
Asher’s alarm wakes them both up bright and early, the sun barely rising outside. He blinks himself awake, pulling himself free from hugging Dylan from behind and shaking him awake as well. If they’re going to do this thing, they’ve gotta get moving.
Thusly, a brief montage ensues of the two of them getting geared up for the mission. Pulling on their cozy sweaters, getting that good dental hygiene in with a brush and floss, Dylan attaching his skateboard to the back of his backpack and tightening the straps on his shoulders.
EXT. GARCIA HOME - DAY
Then Dylan kicks open the front door, the two of them ready for action. Heavy coats, gloves, and cute knit hats abound.
Dylan: Let’s get some holiday cheer, bitches.
EXT. NEW YORK STREETS - DAY
As they embark on their journey, however, they quickly become aware that this is going to be more difficult than they previously anticipated. Snow continued to fall overnight, and the sidewalks and roadways are slick with slush and ice.
So they’re stumbling and slipping as they make their way to the grocery store near Asher’s street, catching one another from falling entirely. Asher confirms that everyone has seen their text in the Techie Tots group chat, and slowly they’re sending in Venmo payments to chip in.
Dylan sets a timer on his phone. It’s 8AM now, and they’ll want to get to Lucas’s apartment by 8PM if they want a chance of catching him in his least Grinch-like mood. Especially given that Riley’s party is scheduled to start around the same time. That gives them 12 hours to get everything done. Piece of cake!
Just as he declares it so, Dylan nearly slips. Asher just barely manages to put him back upright.
INT. GROCERY STORE - DAY
Asher and Dylan step through the sliding doors, two men on a mission. All things considered, they’re lucky the store is even open with the weather and the holiday coming up. The MANAGER who just opened up questions what they’re doing there so damn early, especially with this terrible weather.
Dylan: It’s a noble mission that brings us here today, good sir. A labor of love, a perhaps doomed attempt to save a friend already gone, but an important task nonetheless --
Manager: Yeah, whatever, man. Just come to the front when you’re done.
Asher and Dylan exchange a look and a shrug. Asher retrieves the list from his pocket, gearing up to go through the process of collecting all the necessary rations in record time.
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Little Saint Nick” as performed by The Beach Boys || Performed by Asher Garcia & Dylan Orlando
While the boys grab their cart and make their way through the aisles, the task is intercut with our first Dylan & Asher holiday duet. Naturally, Dylan plays his guitar and harmonizes while Asher takes the lead vocal. It’s unclear whether Dylan is actually not a bad singer as myth has led his classmates to believe or if it’s just a product of their imagination, but who are we to question it? It’s Dylan & Asher!
INT. AAA - AUDITORIUM - DAY
For the purposes of the performance, it’s cut between their duet alter egos wandering the aisles of the supermarket and performing on the AAA stage. As for how we can tell them apart, the Duet Dasher are far more well-groomed and dressed than their actual selves. They’re greatly channeling cheeky 50s energy, with coiffed hair and adorable fancy sweaters and vests.
To that point, the entire performance is purposefully cheeky. It’s somewhat of a satirical take on how serious the performances tend to be at AAA each week, Asher and Dylan acting more so as if they’re in a music video. They grin right at the camera, do a lot of synchronized steps, croon into the microphone like they’re the Beatles on Ed Sullivan.
INT. GROCERY STORE - DAY
Meanwhile, actual Asher and Dylan are painstakingly gathering all of their materials. Asher is once again riding in the cart while Dylan pushes, the former grabbing things and crossing them off the list as they go.
At one point the camera watches between two aisles as Dylan and Asher go back and forth with their cart, goofing off but also accidentally losing control of the cart and chasing after it. But they manage to accomplish their first task, sidling up to the register and unloading their stuff just as Duet Dasher gives us a parting wink from the auditorium stage.
Just as they’re adding up their total bill, Asher realizes in horror that not everyone has sent in their contribution yet. There’s no way they’re going to be able to pay without everyone’s contribution, especially without Isadora’s usual help. At first Dylan suggests using “the fund,” to which Asher snaps in exasperation.
Asher: I’m not using my college fund!
Dylan: It’s a holiday emergency!
Asher instead focuses on who hasn’t paid, narrowing down the culprit and letting out a feral growl Lucas would be proud of as he dials their number. This leaves Dylan to engage with the cashier and buy them some time, which he does with a bright beam and a bat of his eyelashes.
Dylan: Hi. How’s it going for ya?
The moment whoever Asher is calling picks up, he lets them have the full force of his anxious, feral stress.
Asher: NATHANIEL!
INT. NATE’S HOME - LIVING ROOM - DAY
Nate is crashed on his couch, eating junk food and playing video games as he enjoys the first day of winter break. He puts the phone on speaker and props it on his shoulder, keeping his focus on the game while he chats.
Nate: Hey, Ashlie. What’s up, man?
INT. GROCERY STORE - DAY
The scene continues between the two locations as Asher and Nate argue about the payment. Asher knows he saw his text, and everyone else has chipped in. But in Nate’s defense, as he goes on to say, there’s no guarantee that any of this is even going to work. It’s a noble pursuit, and he has mad respect for both of them…
Dylan: What’s he saying?
Asher: He has great respect for both of us.
Dylan: Aw. That’s so sweet. Tell him I love him, too.
… but he’s not going to just throw money around. The chances of them pulling this off are slim, and he needs the money. While Asher continues to nudge him, Dylan continues to try and win over their cashier.
Dylan: So… um… do you come here often?
Cashier, flatly: I’m a cashier.
Dylan: Yeah. [ a beat ] Tough business to be in this time of year, eh? Or... any time of year...
Asher is starting to wear Nate down, so he agrees he’ll send over his fair share… but with an “insurance fee.”
Asher: An insurance fee? What the hell is an insurance fee?
Nate: You know, like, money back guarantee.
Asher: Well, yeah, of course we’ll pay you guys back if --
Nate: But that’s not very incentivizing, is it? No, that’s what the fee is for. If you guys blow it, then I get my money back plus fifteen percent interest.
Asher: Fifteen percent?! Who are you, Scrooge McDuck?
Dylan has changed tactics, digging through his wallet for other potential forms of payment.
Dylan: Do you perchance take hug coupons? [ a beat, then quickly ] Wait, no, I need those...
The clock is ticking, so Asher can’t afford to argue much longer. After Nate points out that it’s merely common sense business practice -- the only helpful class he’s really taken at AAA so far -- Asher caves and agrees to the insurance fee.
Nate: My contribution is incoming. I’m wishing you both the best of luck, honest.
Asher: Kiss my ass, Nathaniel Dean Martinez!
Nate: God, feral Asher is my favorite Asher. See y’all tonight… maybe.
Once Asher hangs up, it’s mere seconds before Nate’s payment comes through. He comes to Dylan’s aid and swipes that debit card. Groceries secured!
EXT. NEW YORK STREETS - DAY
Asher and Dylan attempt to travel once again, only now they’re balancing grocery bags in that equation as well. They have to hold onto one another’s arms to stay upright, and even then they continue to slip a lot. At this point, they’re more concerned about the contents of their bags than their own well-being.
INT. GARCIA HOME - KITCHEN - DAY
It’s a relief when they make it back to the house, unpacking and inventorying their items and putting what needs to be refrigerated away for safe-keeping.
As Asher stocks the fridge, Dylan crosses the shopping off their list. The next item is a big ticket one -- finding the perfect tree. It’s going to be tough without Isadora’s usual expertise, not to mention that the first task took longer than expected. They’re now running with only 8 hours to go.
Plenty of time, Dylan declares. But if they’re looking to save minutes, he has ideas about how they could speed up their travel… as a sunshine grin takes over his features...
EXT. NEW YORK STREETS - DAY
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Holiday Flight” as scored by John Williams for Home Alone || Instrumental
Dylan’s brilliant idea is, inarguably, bonkers. The two of them are dangerously riding his skateboard down the slippery streets, Dylan using a broom to push them along rather than risking slipping on his own feet.
It’s insane, but it sure is speeding up their distance per minute. Dylan is grinning like a maniac as he steers them along and maneuvers around other seasoned New Yorkers, Asher holding on for dear life from behind.
Dylan: See! I told you it would work!
Asher: [ hiding his head in Dylan’s shoulder ] We’re going to die, we’re going to die --
EXT. CHRISTMAS TREE FARM - DAY
Thankfully, the two of them make it to the tree farm in one piece, albeit windswept. Asher looks a little sick, and he has to hold onto Dylan’s arm just to keep from getting dizzy and stumbling.
The daunting task of picking a tree doesn’t help matters. The selection is smaller than usual so close to the holiday, but it’s still a maze of potential greenery and the two of them don’t even know where to start.
Dylan makes a bold move, scanning the rows until he spots one and claims it’s the perfect choice. He, of course, has eyed the largest tree in the bunch. The TREE ATTENDANT comes over to join them, seeing if they need help.
Dylan: How much for this one?
Asher: Well, actually, we’re kind of looking for ones that are a bit --
Tree Attendant: Why, that one there is Rhonda. She’s sort of the queen around here, one of our burliest residents.
Dylan: Rhonda, Asher!
Asher reminds Dylan that they’re looking for something small, even if Rhonda is… beautiful in her own special way. Dylan is heartbroken, but he assures Rhonda that it’s nothing to do with her. It’s all them.
The tree attendant guides them to the more appropriately sized trees for what they’re looking for, Dylan wondering how on Earth they get trees to grow this small.
Dylan: Oh, of course. [ matter-of-factly, with a wise nod ] Shrink ray.
Tree Attendant: … he’s real special, isn’t he?
Asher, fondly: Yeah, he’s one of a kind.
The tree attendant leaves them to look at their pickings, but the task still feels daunting. So many potential trees, so little time.
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Sleigh Ride” as performed by The Carpenters || Performed by Asher Garcia & Dylan Orlando
Same routine as the last duet, only no auditorium jump this time around. While actual Dylan and Asher make their ways through the trees and attempt to identify the perfect one, Duet Dasher with their fancy threads and swoopy hair casually saunter their way down the aisles while performing the Carpenters classic. Naturally, cheek comes with the territory.
While Duet Dasher is skipping around in the snow, Dylan and Asher are narrowing down their search. Once they think they’ve found the right one, another road block develops -- this tiny tree is way heavier than it looks. Thus, the second half of the number involves them attempting different ways to move this tree between the two of them… with limited success.
Duet Dasher wrap their performance by playing leap frog, popping up behind the rows of trees, and grinning at the camera again; Dylan and Asher wrap up their try at getting the tree mobile by Dylan pulling Asher while he holds onto the tree, both of them losing their grip and collapsing off-screen into the snow.
EXT. CHRISTMAS TREE FARM - DAY - LATER
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Star of Bethlehem” as scored by John Williams for Home Alone || Instrumental (first ~90 seconds)
Dylan sits forlornly by the tree while Asher paces, impatiently waiting for back up. It arrives in the form of Dave and Jade, who express that they got their call and are there to help with the big emergency. Asher explains the dilemma, gesturing to Dylan sitting by their choice selection.
Jade, unimpressed: This is the tree you picked? You guys are hopeless.
Asher is offended, but Jade promises them she’ll help them pick a better tree in no time. She was the original assistant to Isadora the first time they did this in freshman year. Dylan holds out his hands and Asher helps pull him back to his feet, the four of them setting off.
Once Jade has identified the superior fir, Dylan and Asher point out the weight problem. It’s too heavy for them to transport, especially with nothing but Dylan’s skateboard. Dave gives it a try, lifting the small evergreen like it’s nothing and hoisting it onto his shoulder.
Dylan, delighted: You are a miraculous freak of nature, Davis Williams.
If they’re showing up to this shindig anyway, Jade and Dave agree that they’ll play tree keeper and make sure it gets to Lucas’s on time. The group of them head out to pay together.
EXT. NEW YORK STREETS - DAY
Asher and Dylan are catching a quick lunch with Jade and Dave, the four of them sharing a pick-me-up on the street corner and discussing how the holiday heroics are going. Dave stands with the tree, balancing it against his hip.
Dave: I wonder how they make Christmas trees this small. [ a beat ] Oh, duh.
Dylan/Dave, in unison: Shrink ray.
While Dylan breaks off a piece of his food and hands it to Asher for him to try, the latter explains that they’re making good progress. They’ve got 5 hours left, and all they have to do is retrieve the decorations and they’ll be all set. So if they could grab them from Jade, that would be great.
Jade: What? I don’t have them.
Asher starts choking in surprise, all of them reacting accordingly. Jade and Dave back off a bit while Dylan pats Asher’s back, rubbing his shoulders when he’s able to breathe again.
Asher: What? What do you mean you don’t have them?
Jade: They’re still in the auditorium as far as I know. When we were cleaning up last year, Lucas told me that he was going to put them somewhere for safekeeping. So I handed them over and that was the last I saw of them.
Dylan pulls a napkin and lightly dabs at Asher’s face. He gives him a grateful nod, still trying to wrap his mind around this bombshell.
Asher: God, Jade, don’t you know not to trust Lucas with anything?
Jade: Um, no, I know not to trust Dave with anything.
Dave, flatly: … ow.
Jade holds up a hand, waving him off. This completely changes Dylan and Asher’s understanding of what they set out to do.
But they’ve still got to try. They finish their meal quickly and bid Dave and Jade farewell, assuring them that they’ll see them at Lucas’s at 8 sharp. Dave is confused that they still think they can pull this off, but they’re already boarding Dylan’s skateboard death trap again.
Dave: You guys are cracked.
Dylan: High praise, coming from you, my friend.
Dylan gives them a salute, Asher holding on tight as they push off down the street. Jade and Dave watch them go, shaking their heads and finishing their snack.
EXT. AAA - DAY
The sun is beginning to set as Dylan and Asher stop outside the school, rushing up the slippery steps. They try the front entrance first, which is obviously locked.
Dylan: [ with a shrug ] Worth a shot.
EXT. AAA - RIGHT SIDE - DAY
They continue to do a full perimeter sweep of the building, searching for any potential entry points. It seems like a lost cause until they get around to the side of the building where the custodial services backs out to, a window left cracked open on the second floor offering a slim chance. Asher points it out, the two of them standing close together and staring up at it.
Just as they’re brainstorming how to approach the situation, Asher’s phone rings. He picks it up, surprised to hear from Isadora on the other end. While he turns around to focus on the call, Dylan rolls his shoulders and marches towards the building. He climbs up onto the dumpster against the wall, starting an ambitious scaling to get to the window.
Isadora asks if Asher thinks he or the techies will be attending Riley’s party. He states that they aren’t, Dylan disappearing out of frame above him as Isadora seems to react negatively to that. Asher points out that this shouldn’t exactly be surprising considering none of them really know how to interact with Riley at this point -- like sure, he’d like to be there, but that’s not their tradition is it?
Isadora: What, that tradition that isn’t even happening this year? That the own creator of said tradition ditched because he’s just not in the mood?
Asher: Look, I’m not saying it’s a perfect --
Isadora: So you’re just gonna hold allegiance to this thing that isn’t even happening for… what? A guy who doesn’t even care?
Asher grows defensive, attempting to speak on behalf of Lucas and argue that he does care. The last thing he needs at the moment is a reality check, but Isadora is especially good at giving them. Feeling cornered, he makes a brusque effort to deflect focus.
Asher: Well it’s easy for you to say, isn’t it? You’ve got tons of new friends now, so what do you have to worry about?
Isadora goes quiet on the other end. Asher realizes how harsh he may have come across, closing his eyes and sighing. He tries to turn it around.
Asher: Look, I just meant… you’ve got a lot going for you, Isa. You should go. Have fun, enjoy the holiday with people who are actually happy to share it with you. [ a beat ] Sometimes, I wish I were doing the same.
Before either of them can continue, Asher is startled by Dylan falling from the ledge outside the second story window and landing in the open dumpster. Asher shrieks.
Isadora: Asher, what --
Asher: Gotta go!
He hangs up without further explanation, sprinting over to the dumpster. He shouts for Dylan, jumping halfway up the dumpster and hanging over the side.
Dylan pops his head up, obviously dazed. Asher grips his shoulders and face, checking for irreversible damage.
Asher: Oh my God, are you okay?
Dylan: … well. That’s gonna hurt tomorrow. Ha.
Asher helps pull him from the dumpster. He’s a bit unsteady on his feet, Asher having to rush forward and stabilize him when he almost falls over. Asher wonders if they should go to the ER, but Dylan waves him off.
Dylan: I’ve had… worse falls. Ha ha, remember when I tried to skateboard into the subway and broke my arm and three of my toes?
Asher: … I try not to.
The situation is growing increasingly bleak. It’s getting dark, and there’s clearly no way they’re going to be able to get inside.
Dylan: Just give me a minute, then I’ll try again --
Asher: Try -- try again? No, no you are not trying that again!
Dylan: Well, if it’s the only way inside --
Asher: No. No, sorry, I didn’t ask for a dead boyfriend for Christmas!
It isn’t going to work. They’ve only got 3 hours left, and there are still so many pieces that aren’t working. Asher is starting to spiral, the hopelessness of the semester finally creeping up on him. Dylan suggests they give up on the decorations and just move forward with the party anyway, but Asher questions why they’re even bothering at all. They should just go home.
He marches back towards the main street in a huff. It takes Dylan a second, but he shakes off his daze and jogs after him.
EXT. AAA - NIGHT
The sun has set as Asher stumbles down the steps and back towards the sidewalk, Dylan calling for him to wait up. He does, wiping at his eyes as his boyfriend catches up to him. A light snow is beginning to fall again.
Dylan asks why Asher is suddenly giving up. They’ve still got time and solid chances, but Asher disagrees. They’ve hit a dead end, and this entire semester has been leading towards it. And what’s the point anyway? With how Lucas has been acting lately, he probably won’t even care about all the effort they put into this. He won’t care. He probably doesn’t even want them there.
Dylan: You know that’s not true.
Asher: Maybe everyone else was right. We’re being stupid. I’m being stupid. [ with a tearful huff, quietly ] Maybe sometimes things just fall apart.
He’s reached a breaking point, and rightfully so. Dylan clearly wants to help, or say something that will magically fix things, but he doesn’t have the words. He’s never been smart with words.
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “O Holy Night” as scored by John Williams for Home Alone || Instrumental
Suddenly, the street lights flick on as the sounds of a church organ float down the somewhat empty street. Dylan looks over his shoulder to search for the source, blinking the snow out of his eyes. He seems to find what he’s looking for, hit with an idea.
Gently, he reaches out and takes Asher’s hand. Asher lifts his gaze to meet his eyes, looking at him curiously. Dylan doesn’t say anything, but gives him a tentative smile before beginning to lead the way down the street.
Asher follows without question, letting him guide the way.
INT. CHURCH - NIGHT
Dylan and Asher arrive at the entrance of the church a block or so away from Adams, cautiously making their way inside. The music is coming from the youth church choir, rehearsing for Christmas Eve mass most likely. Yes, this is directly reminiscent of Home Alone.
Still hand in hand, the boys toss an uncertain look to the church worker standing by the main entrance. But she doesn’t give them any trouble, offering a welcoming nod and smile as they ease their way inside. This definitely isn’t Charlie’s church, in any case.
They make their way further inside and settle into one of the back pews, Dylan sitting down first and waiting for Asher to join him. For a moment they absorb the atmosphere, the calm beauty of the architecture and the soothing tones of the choir. It’s a well-needed second to breathe after the day they’ve had. Dylan rests their joined hands against Asher’s knee.
Considering how much work they’ve been doing alone, it’s a bit of a surprise to be addressed by someone new.
Man: Mind if I join you?
Asher and Dylan turn to the aisle, shocked to see their new visitor outside of school.
Asher/Dylan: Janitor Harley Keiner???
HARLEY KEINER jokes about how he does in fact exist outside of AAA, before posing the question again. Both of them nod, scooting down a bit to make room.
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Star of Bethlehem - Voice” as scored by John Williams for Home Alone || Instrumental
As Harley settles in next to Asher, he wonders what he’s doing there. Harley claims he could ask them the same thing, before going on to point out one of the young girls singing in the youth choir. He explains that she’s his niece, and while he doesn’t come around for the actual service since he’s far from a practiced man of faith, he does like to come and listen to them rehearse. Sort of a little tradition he has.
Dylan: Oh, we know all about traditions.
Harley: That right?
Asher: Well, thought we did. Don’t think it’s going to shape up all that well this year.
Harley: Ah, yeah. Your secret little auditorium party, yeah?
Dylan/Asher, in shock: You know about that?!
Harley: Boys, my entire job is to know the status of that school day in and day out --
Dylan: I thought it was to clean.
Harley: Tip of the iceberg, Orlando.
That seems to blow Dylan’s mind. His expression conveys as much as he tries to process it, while Asher awkwardly apologizes for any trouble their tradition might have caused. But Harley waves him off. He says he’s not against a little holiday cheer, nor the harmless tomfoolery that might accompany it. He’s no stranger to tomfoolery.
Neither is their ringleader, he knows. And given that they’re locked out in the cold, Harley guesses that Lucas must not be helping the endeavor this year. They agree, in vague terms, but explain that it almost makes them feel like they need to make it happen even more so.
Harley: I’m not arguing with that. Truth be told, Lucas reminds me a lot of myself when I was your age. Good ideals, less than ideal circumstances, always looking for the quick thrill or easy way out. Need a good distraction, you know?
Asher and Dylan exchange a look. Sounds about right.
Harley: Only difference is, I was kicking it all on my own. Wasn’t great about keeping friends, and the ones I had weren’t true blue. So I ended up making all the wrong turns.
Asher: I’m sorry to hear that.
Harley: Oh, hey, don’t go feeling sorry for me. I’m old, I hardly need the sympathy, save it for your friends who need it. And to be honest, I’m lucky. I’m lucky to have ended up where I did, all things considered. But sometimes I do think about what I might be doing now, had things gone differently. [ a beat ] If Lucas has friends like the two of you in his corner, looking out for him, then he’s already far better off than I was.
[ Dylan smiles. Asher thinks on it, then shrugs. ]
Asher: Well, we love him.
Harley: I’ll tell ya, he knows. And it means more than either of you will ever fully know.
Could just be the random musings of their kooky school janitor, but he speaks like he knows what he’s talking about. And Dylan and Asher want to believe it. It’s a good reminder as to why they set out to do this crazy thing in the first place.
Harley sits up, asking if the boys will do him one favor before he heads out. He requests that they apologize to Lucas on his behalf, on account of the whole “pest” situation in the booth. He was just doing his job, but he didn’t realize there would be such immediate ramifications. He never meant for him to get the boot.
Harley: I’m sure it’s no fun to be put out of what you considered home, ‘specially if you were desperate enough to make that your home in the first place.
Asher and Dylan nod along, more than happy to pass on the message. Harley gives them a smile and a warm farewell, wishing both of them the best of luck and happy holidays.
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Making the Plane” as scored by John Williams for Home Alone || Instrumental
By the time he’s out of the pew, Asher notices he left behind a few of his keys. He holds them up, calling after him.
Asher: Um, Harley, sir, you forgot your keys.
Harley: [ without looking back ] No, I didn’t.
Asher frowns in confusion, glancing down at the keys in his hands. It hits him at the exact same time it dawns on Dylan, the two of them locking eyes with their jaws dropped open.
Bingo.
EXT. NEW YORK STREETS - NIGHT
Dylan and Asher are tearing across the street again, holding hands for balance as they dart their way back towards AAA.
EXT. AAA - BACK ENTRANCE - NIGHT
Dylan slides up to the doors first, Asher tossing him the keys. He unlocks the door and lets out a muted cheer, holding the door open for Asher to run through. Then he leaps in after him, glancing over his shoulder and shutting them inside.
INT. AAA - HALLWAY - NIGHT
The halls are dim, the building shut down for the holidays. Only the emergency lights are still on, providing enough light for Dylan and Asher to see as they peer over the windows in the doors to the auditorium.
This, they don’t have the keys for, so they’ll have to improvise. Asher digs in his pocket and retrieves a paper clip, bending it backwards until it’s usable as a lock pick.
Asher: We’ve spent enough time with Lucas in the last three years, this’ll be a snap. All we have to do is --
Asher curses to himself, accidentally pinching his finger while attempting to pick the lock. He sucks at the blood bruise on his finger, Dylan delicately taking the paper clip from his hands.
Dylan: Maybe I should try?
Asher: Yeah, okay.
Like techie dad, like techie son. Dylan is successful in picking the lock, ushering Asher inside.
INT. AAA - AUDITORIUM - NIGHT
The ghost light illuminates the stage until Dylan flicks on the lights, Asher wandering to the center of the stage and spinning around. The decorations could be anywhere in the auditorium, and they’ve only got 90 minutes left.
Dylan points out that the decorations have to be in the booth. Where else would Lucas put them? Asher acknowledges the likelihood of this, but Harley didn’t give them the key for it. Before they go to the effort of picking another lock, he thinks they should phone a friend.
Asher dials, waiting impatiently for them to pick up. Dylan continues to wander around the stage, looking for other possible alternatives.
Asher: Jeff? Are you there?
INT. JEFF’S HOME - KITCHEN - NIGHT
Jeff is seated at the counter in his kitchen, his family just off-screen. They’re clearly in the process of making holiday snacks, Jeff just taking a bite of a frosted sugar cookie as he answers the phone.
Jeff: Ash Cash Money. What’s up? How goes saving Christmas?
Asher claims it’s fine, and Jeff goes on to state that he’s got hella good cookies for the party… if they manage to pull it off. Asher claims they will, as Dylan gesturing to a theoretical watch gets him back on track. He questions if Jeff knows whether Lucas hid the decorations in the booth, which Jeff confidently denies.
Jeff: There’s no way they’re in there. I didn’t see them all year, and that booth is not that big. I would’ve seen them if they were there.
[ Asher gives Dylan a shake of his head. Dylan sighs, running his hands through his hair exasperatedly. ]
Jeff: Besides, Lucas’s whole thing was that he wanted to put them somewhere where nosy performers or administrators wouldn’t find them. If they were looking, like you guys, the booth is the first place they would check. He made a point of not being obvious.
Dylan: Damn that beautiful Grinch.
Asher thanks Jeff, before Dylan cops the phone and asks if he would be willing to pick up Dave and Jade and help with the tree. The roads have cleared up, and they’ll be coming from the same area. He and Asher could do it, but they’re running out of time.
Dylan: Besides, there’s the whole thing of the pine needles, and you know how Asher gets about messes. We’d be picking needles out of my Jeep for like a year.
Jeff: Yeah, yeah, whatever. I’m on it. Good luck, gays.
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Attack On the House” as scored by John Williams for Home Alone || Instrumental
Dylan salutes on instinct, hanging up and handing the phone back to Asher. The two of them are at a loss, not sure where to look next. There’s way too much ground to cover with the time they have remaining.
Dylan: Well, you know what we have to do, don’t you?
Asher: What?
Dylan, boldly: We’ve got to think like Lucas.
Asher: [ making a disturbed face ] … I don’t wanna.
Dylan declares that it’s the only way, rushing over to stand with him and taking his hands. He takes a deep breath, claiming that they’ll use the same practices as that exercise stretching thing Asher makes them do.
Asher: … you mean yoga?
Dylan: Yeah! Except instead of channeling the greater cosmic energy, we’re… channeling the energy of our demonic best friend.
Asher, wearily: We’re gonna get possessed.
Still, it may very well be the only way. Dylan instructs him to close his eyes, both of them letting out a deep breath. They release hands as they each begin to pace, eyes still closed. They’re channeling Lucas… thinking like Lucas…
Asher: I’m… thinking loyal. Unapologetic. Weirdly flirty.
Dylan: Sounds about right.
Asher: I’m… dressing badly. Need a haircut.
Dylan: Repressing my emotions --
Asher, sharply: No regard for other people’s feelings --
Dylan: … well, at least we’re being honest.
They continue the exercise, gearing their train of thought towards where Lucas would hide something. Dylan takes the reins.
Dylan: I’m… definitely still keeping it in the auditorium.
Asher: Definitely.
Dylan: I’m not sure I even actually know any other part of the school, even though I complain about it ninety percent of the day. I might have a crush on the auditorium.
Asher: Complaining is definitely on the right track.
Dylan: I’m thinking… costume loft. There’s so many other bags and things in there, no one would notice --
Asher: But no, I wouldn’t. Because that’s where people go to hook up, and --
Dylan/Asher, in unison: I’m scared of all forms of intimacy!
Dylan: Good catch, good catch.
Another failure, another chance to try again.
Asher: I’m thinking… maybe the prop loft?
Dylan: No, nope I wouldn’t do that. Because I know Asher would find it, and he’d get so distracted with trying to organize it that he might overdo it and we might have to end up getting a bunch of new decorations anyway.
Asher pauses, opening his eyes and giving Dylan a look. Dylan tilts his head at the quiet, peeking to look at him and catching the expression on his face.
Dylan, quickly: But his boyfriend Dylan Orlando would love it if he did that!
Asher sneers, shaking off the moment and redirecting his focus. He heads to the center of the stage, doing another 360 turn and shrugging. Dylan drifts over to join him.
Asher: Lucas wouldn’t go beyond the auditorium, but he wouldn’t do something like the dressing rooms where the performers dominate. And we’ve considered like every main techie locale.
Dylan: Then where else? All there is left as a possibility would be --
Realization dawns on them once again, Asher frowning. Slowly, the two of them lift their gaze to look above them, where the catwalk hangs so high above them.
Dylan: Damn that beautiful Grinch.
The two of them make their way over to the stairs to the catwalk, a small nook by the dressing room doors that is fenced off by chainlink. They don’t have the key to this gate either -- only Lucas, Isadora, and the faculty do -- but there’s enough room between the lower ceiling here and the top of the fence where someone might be able to squeeze through.
Dylan rolls up his sleeves, gearing up to start climbing the chainlink. Asher watches apprehensively as he goes, but just when it seems that all will work out… Dylan gets stuck. He overestimated the size of the gap, and he’s too tall and broad-shouldered to fit. There’s a reason Lucas never climbs over this thing… apart from just having the key, of course.
Another dead end. Dylan hops back down, commenting who would’ve thought he wouldn’t fit.
Dylan: Who would’ve thought my shoulders would be the death of me?
Asher: I could’ve told you that.
Mini thirst moment aside, Dylan claims he doesn’t know what they’re going to do. He’s not going to be able to make it through, and with Asher’s fear of heights there’s no way he’s going up on that catwalk. What a shame, to have gotten this far only to come out with nothing.
Only Asher doesn’t seem like he’s giving up. He approaches the chainlink, lightly touching the metal and glancing up at the climb. They’ve already wasted their entire day, and Harley’s words of wisdom are rattling around in his skull. This is something they need to do.
Asher: Oh, to hell with it. Boost me, I’m going up.
Dylan kneels down to help Asher start climbing, the latter having had his fair share of practice after being friends with Lucas for so long. He has more luck than Dylan, managing to just squeeze through the opening and end up on the other side. When he jumps down and sticks the landing he throws his hands up on instinct, Dylan mirroring the gesture enthusiastically.
Now all there is left to do is go up. Asher approaches the tiny spiral staircase, gulping as he looks up at it. Dylan comes up to the chainlink and watches forlornly from the other side, obviously wishing he could be there with him.
Dylan: You don’t have to do this.
But all Asher can think about is Lucas. So he does. He really does. Asher exhales a sigh.
Asher: Just don’t let me look down.
INT. AAA - CATWALK - NIGHT
Asher emerges nervously from the stairs, eyeing the catwalk stretching across the stage before him. It seems to go on forever. Already, he’s starting to feel a little woozy.
Dylan pulls him out of it, jogging out of the wings and onto the stage so that he’s underneath him. For every step Asher takes, he takes one with him. With him in spirit, even if he can’t be there to hold his hand in person.
Dylan: You got this. Just focus on walking. One step at a time. Walking and breathing.
Asher nods, keeping his eyes straight ahead of him as he carefully steps out from the platform and onto the suspended catwalk. He swallows, letting out another nervous breath as he takes another step.
Dylan aims to keep him distracted, finding other things to focus on.
Dylan: Let’s think about something else. Think about… production design for the spring production. Or, uh, what you’re going to eat first at the party. [ a beat ] Count backwards from 453 by 7.
Asher: Dyl…
Dylan: I’m serious, it’s harder than it sounds. But okay, sure, no math. Think about Dave’s catastrophic disaster area of a locker -- no wait, don’t do that! That’ll just make you more stressed.
Asher is hardly listening to what he’s actually saying, but it’s clear just hearing his voice is helpful. He’s down to crawling at this point and his eyes are basically screwed shut, but he’s still moving. That’s not nothing.
About halfway across, Asher opens his eyes and squints towards the opposite end where the catwalk bookends. From what he can make out, there seems to be a lump of some kind tucked away in the rafters that could very well be a bag of decorations…
Energized by potential success, Asher scrambles to the other end and drops down in front of the bag, pulling it towards him. To his relief, all of their decorations from last year are tucked inside.
Asher: I got it! Dylan, I found them!
Dylan: You did?
Asher: I did!
Dylan: Hell yeah, paramour!
Asher and Dylan negotiate how to get the thing down, certain there aren’t any breakables that might get destroyed if he drops it. He lowers the bag as far as he can without looking, letting it go. Dylan catches it easily, dropping it at his feet and assuring Asher that he got it. Now he just has to come down and they’re set!
And with 1 hour to spare. It’ll take them half of it to get the groceries and make it to Lucas’s, so not too shabby. Asher nods and climbs back to his feet, making a much quicker trek back across the other direction.
However, Asher’s lack of catwalk experience leaves him unaware of the rickety rung. There’s one specific rung connecting two pieces of the catwalk that’s not as stable as the others -- not a true threat as it’s still highly secured, but it can sure cause quite a disturbance if it’s jostled.
Which is exactly what happens. Asher accidentally knocks his boot against the rung, causing the whole catwalk to groan and tremble in response. It feels like the whole thing is going to come apart and Asher freaks, dropping down to his hands and knees and accidentally sending a spare wrench off the side off the catwalk towards the stage.
Asher: Dylan, look out -- !
Dylan: Ash!
Dylan ducks out of the way, narrowly avoiding being hit by the falling wrench. But he’s hardly concerned about that. He’s far more concerned about how Asher has totally stopped moving, frozen in fear and huddled in the middle of the catwalk. He’s making himself as small as possible, screwing his eyes shut.
Asher: Shit, shit, shit --
Dylan jogs back under the catwalk, trying to get a better angle on what’s going on up there.
Dylan: Ash! Asher, are you okay?
Asher isn’t exactly equipped to answer. He’s on the verge of a panic attack, hands trembling and breathing uneven. Dylan stares up at him, their original mission long forgotten.
Dylan: Ash…
Tentatively, Asher opens his eyes. He can make out Dylan staring up at him through the metal of the catwalk, but the distance from where he is to the ground is way more gripping. He winces and closes his eyes again, shaking his head.
Asher: … just go.
Dylan: What?
Asher: Go on without me. You’ve got the decorations. It’ll be fine.
Dylan: You’re out of your mind, I’m not leaving you here.
Asher claims he has to. For Lucas, and so they don’t owe Nate 15%. Because they’ve wasted all this time, and now his anxious ass is going to blow it. They’ve gotten this far, and he’s not going to be the reason they don’t make it. But Dylan isn’t hearing it.
Dylan: Look, screw Nate and screw the mission, alright? Asher, I’m not leaving you here alone. I’m not going anywhere.
Hard to argue with that. Asher exhales another harsh breath, trying to get control of his breathing. He’s had panic attacks before, he knows he’ll survive it. He just has to breathe.
Dylan tells him he’s going to be with him the whole time, and that they’re going to get him down. He doesn’t even have to open his eyes, he just has to be willing to move. Dylan will talk him through the rest.
Dylan: If anything happens, you know I’ll catch you.
Asher: [ exhaling a nervous laugh ] Then we’ll both be dead --
Dylan: No one is dying. No dead boyfriends for Christmas, remember?
It’s hard to find humor in such a bleak situation, yet somehow Dylan manages. Asher exhales another shaky laugh, still not opening his eyes but less petrified than before. Dylan smiles.
Dylan: I’m with you, Ash. I got you. But you have to move.
So… he does. A little bit. Then a little bit more. He’s completely trusting in Dylan to make sure he’s on the right track, eyes still closed as he gives him encouragement and guidance from below. It’s clear that the two of them are experts at communicating with one another, knowing exactly what to say or how to react to each other.
When there’s only a few more steps left, Asher has made it back to a crouch. He tentatively opens his eyes, and seeing the end so close, scrambles up and makes a mad dash for it. He lands on the platform to the stairs with an exhausted sigh, Dylan cheering for him from down below.
INT. AAA - AUDITORIUM - NIGHT
Asher manages to propel himself through his final escape from the catwalk, handling it on his own until he’s climbing back over the chainlink. He loses his grip with shaky hands and slips off the other side, but as promised, Dylan is there to catch his fall. He holds him around the middle and pulls him back a comfortable distance from the fence, giving both of them the chance to breathe.
Then Asher straightens up, turning around just in time for Dylan to take his face and pull him into an enthusiastic kiss. When they pull apart Dylan can’t stop grinning, still holding his face and looking at him proudly.
Dylan: Asher Garcia, you are the most badass person I know. And you just saved Christmas.
Well, not quite yet. They’ve got just about 30 minutes left, so they better book it.
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “We Wish You A Merry Christmas” as scored by John Williams for Home Alone || Instrumental (first 40 seconds)
Dylan sprints to the stage and grabs the bag of decorations. Then he takes Asher’s outstretched hand, the two of them hitting the lights and dashing out of the auditorium as the music once again swells to accent their frantic travel.
EXT. NEW YORK STREETS - NIGHT
One more sequence of the two of them racing through the snowy streets on Dylan’s skateboard graces the screen, Asher still holding on for dear life. Snow continues to fall in flurries around them, as the soothing tones of Hugh Martin float in…
INT. LUCAS’S APARTMENT - LIVING AREA - NIGHT
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas” as performed by Hugh Martin for Home Alone || Instrumental
Given that we’ve seen the arrival before, we know how that bit goes. Instead, we jump to the party in full swing, Jade and Jeff focused on decorating the tiny tree while Dave chats with GRACE FRIAR in the background.
Nate passes Asher seated in front of the couch, giving him a pat on the shoulder and sharing props for pulling everything off. Asher nods, accepting the praise.
Dylan appears next to him a moment later, plopping down with a sigh and a plate of holiday treats. He hands one of the cookies to Asher and throws an arm around his shoulder, pulling him close. Even though their appearance feels more worn and ragged than the first time we saw them arrive to this party, it’s evident how warm and happy they are.
Dylan lightly pokes Asher in the ribs, asking if he has any idea how proud of him he is. Asher kind of brushes him off, but Dylan isn’t letting him shirk the compliments.
Dylan: I mean it. I know we did a lot of wacky stuff today, a lot of which you weren’t exactly comfortable with. I mean, we broke into the school. And you went up in the catwalk, dude.
Asher: Trying to forget those details, yeah.
Dylan: Well, I’m never going to forget it. And you know, everything you’ve already given to help Lucas… just proves what a good friend you are. I’m proud I get to call you that… [ another nudge ] and more.
Asher grows shy at the sincerity, lightly nudging him back. But he decides he has something to say too, holding Dylan’s hand that’s draped over his shoulder.
Asher: Well, you know, the only reason we did any of it was because of you. [ off Dylan’s dismissive shrug ] I’m serious. All of it was your idea, and every time we hit a road block you were the one who found a solution. It was your loyalty that motivated you to suggest we give it a shot in the first place.
Dylan’s turn to be bashful -- something only Asher Garcia can really accomplish. He dips his head down, trying to hold back his smile. Asher waits for him to meet his eyes again.
Asher: You never lose faith. That’s one of my favorite things about you. [ a beat ] That’s why I love you.
After a moment, Dylan breaks into a soft beam. He leans forward and gives him a peck on the cheek, Asher grinning and turning it into a quick kiss on the lips.
They pull back as Lucas enters the frame, plopping down on the floor next to them in front of his mom on the couch. He offers them something from his own plate which they eagerly take, the three of them engaging in easy conversation. Sharing the holiday together, bringing brightness to their best friend’s life, who they worked so hard to pull this off for.
And from how cozy and loving the Friar apartment suddenly feels, clearly that effort is always worth it.
END OF SPECIAL.
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “We Wish You a Merry Christmas” as performed by John Denver & The Muppets || Performed by Asher Garcia, Dylan Orlando, Nate Martinez, Jade Beamon, Dave Williams, and Jeff Monroe
To close out the special and accompany the credits, our six supporting technicians close out with this silly classic. They’re all wearing cute holiday sweaters, Dave has some Rudolph antlers. Dylan is wearing garland like a scarf again, and plays the lead guitar. The jokes and interjections are more suited to their characters than Muppets version, although Dave takes the “Animal” bit and gets too excited and starts shouting about not going so Nate has to bring him back to Earth.
We wish you an ambitious merry Christmas, and a happy techie New Year!
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