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ugly-crying-over-bucky-barnes · 4 years ago

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Promises Not Kept Epilogue

Summary: Tommy Shelby made a promise to Jonah Ward while in the war. A promise he didn't keep. But it comes to haunt him when he tries to drown out his sorrows with a young woman.

Epilogue: Tommy just wants to go home.

It was three in the morning when Tommy woke his wife up. “I want to go home.” He decided once Leah had sat up and opened her eyes.

“Huh?” She rubbed her eyes with a yawn. “Home, like Birmingham?”

“No, Arrow House.”

“Alright.” She nodded. After all, she assumed they would have to go home sooner or later. They couldn’t just move in with Alfie for the rest of their lives, even if the children would’ve preferred it.

“No, Lee, I want to go home. Really just go home.”

Perhaps it was the early hour, but Leah didn’t understand. “I don’t get what you mean.”

“I just want to go home. I can turn over the business to someone else in the family. Michael has a plan for running a more legitimate operation. I can give him the reins. As for Parliament, I can run out my time and not run for re-election.”

She looked at him in disbelief. It was the words she wanted to hear him say for years, but never assumed he would ever say them. “Why-what changed your mind?” She wondered, hoping the question wouldn’t put him off from the idea.

“I can’t fucking take it anymore.” He ran a hand through his hair. “I won’t last much longer if I continue. And I can’t leave you or the kids not this soon.”

Although she wanted to jump at the chance to get him to retire, she was hesitant for various reasons. “Last time you tried to relax…” She reminded him.

“I know,” Tommy remembered the haze of anguish as his wife cleaned up the wound on his hand and had to help him up off the floor of his study. “I’m not saying it will be easy. But it’s something.”

Leah bit her lip and reached over to touch his cheek. “I just want you to be happy, Tom.”

He rested a hand over hers. “You and the children make me happy. I just-I just need to leave all the other shit behind.”

She began to cry, tears of joy, but tears all the same. “Oh, Tom.” She gasped in relief and sank into his arms.

He held her close, rubbing her back comfortingly. “Sh, sh, s’alright. It’s going to be alright.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“You know when I got out of the hospital after you shot me in the fucking face. Remember, that right?”

“Yes, Alfie, I remember.”

“Well after I returned here, I sat down in me armchair and wondered what the hell I were going to do the rest of me fucking life.”

The two men were sitting outside in the chairs out on the lawn. There, the children were playing together, savoring their last day in Margate before going back to Warwickshire. Leah was inside making sure that everything was packed and they’d left the rooms in a clean state. She hoped they would be welcomed back in the future, perhaps to go on holiday or just to visit. The beachfront property, and Alfie, had really grown on her.

“’Course I don’t know how many years I’ve got left, right, but it’s still something to think ‘bout innit? Nothing to work on, nothing to keep me occupied. Seemed like a fucking nightmare. But there’s something to be said about retiring. Comforting, right, ‘cause you ain’t got nothing relying on you.” Alfie paused to take a drag from his pipe. “I’m sure that would drive you absolutely bat shit crazy, wouldn’t it?”

Tommy nodded slightly. “I suppose it would. I’ve been moving forward all me life.”

“You’re still moving forward, mate. We all are. Just ‘cause you ain’t out doing anything, making deals ‘n shit. Got to find the happy medium, right. Halfway ‘tween overworking and being dead in the grave.” Alfie pointed at Tommy. “But, I tell you this. You’ve got the advantage, haven’t you? Three young kids and a wife? Mate, if they don’t keep you busy than I don’t know what the fuck will.”

The Brummie nodded slowly, watching his children running about still playing the fantasy game of pirates.

“And by the time they’re older, you’ll’ve gotten used to being idle.”

It was a promising notion. If Tommy could throw himself into his children’s lives, would that be enough to keep the shovels away? He didn’t know until he tried. And he needed to try for their sake and Leah’s sake. “So that’s why you like having them around, aye? You’re lonely?”

Alfie rolled his eyes. “It were a favor to you. No, not even you. Favor to your wife. She’s a fucking saint for putting up with you all these years.”

“That she is.” Tommy couldn’t argue with that.

“Kids, right, they’re messy, loud, whiney, needy, you’ve gotta do everything for them.” He snorted and shook his head. “I’ll stick to raising dogs.” Then he paused. “But sure, they fill the space, don’t they?”

“So, you mind us coming back then.” Tommy surmised, stubbing out his cigarette.

“S’long as you give me a few weeks’ notice, I s’pose that’ll be alright.”

“Of course.”

~~~~~~~~~

“Bye, Uncle Alfie.”

“Hey, now, why the gloomy face, aye?” Alfie knelt down to come eye to eye with Johanna. The Shelbys were all packed up and ready to head back to Warwickshire. But the children were a bit glum.

“I don’t wanna go home.” The little girl pouted and clutched her stuffed rabbit close to her chest.

“Why’s that? S’been a while since you’ve been home. You get to see all the horses again, right?”

Johanna nodded but still stuck out her lower lip.

“Get to go back to school in September too, yeah? You’ll meet new friends and have a grand ol’ time, won’t you?” Alfie tried to get her to lighten up a little.

She just shrugged. “I guess.”

“Buck up, kiddo. You ‘n your family can come back here to visit whenever. Won’t be long ‘till you’re back here on holiday.” He stood and scooped her up so he could help her into the car. Charlie and Cyril were already wedged in the backseat. “Cap’n Charlie.” Alfie tipped his cap. “You look after your crew, aye?”

“Aye-aye!” Charlie beamed proudly.

Leah came out holding Molly. Tommy was following with the last of their things. “Alfie, I don’t know how we can thank you for everything.” She said gently.

“Oh, nonsense.” Alfie shrugged off her concern. “The only thing you two need to do is take care of each other. Tommy and I, right, had a pretty shit upbringing. Perhaps it’s God’s plan that we stop the cycle from repeating, yeah?”

Leah smiled and touched Tommy’s shoulder. “I think we’ll do okay at that.”

Although Tommy was worried about the changes they were entering, he smiled too. “Thank you, Alfie.” He shook the man’s hand. For once it was a handshake purely out of good brotherhood. Not a deal in progress. Just a gesture of thanks.

“Right, set a course for Warwickshire, Miss Joey you keep a close watch on the sails,” Alfie instructed.

Johanna and Charlie laughed out the open window of the car. “Bye, Uncle Alfie!” They chirped happily.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tommy knew that when Arrow House was empty, it felt like a shell of a house. Just bare-bones, chilly and barren. When the children filled the space, it suddenly came alive. Noise was a constant from wake-up time to bedtime. There was a warmth to it that kept even the largest rooms toasty and it wasn’t because it was the beginning of summer.

Photographs filled the space and it was very difficult to walk through the house without stepping or tripping on a toy. Tommy had a particularly nasty tumble when he tripped over a rocking horse in the middle of the night.

But the house was finally becoming something it had never been before even at their best moments. It was a family home. Where everyone felt like they belonged there and there was no doubt of that.

Yet despite the atmosphere changing and the routine settling into stone, things were not all perfect. It was one thing trying to turn over the business to the rest of his family. The process was long and taxing and took a lot of Tommy’s attention. So much so that when it was over, he wasn’t sure what else he could do.

Of course, he still held his seat in Parliament. But he removed himself from the party with Mosley and for the most part kept his head down. He didn’t listen to the rumors or scathing remarks from others. Powerful, up and coming Tommy Shelby was stepping away from it all. He wasn’t the man he used to be.

Tommy knew Mosley had retribution coming for him. It was only a matter of time. Instead, he focused on what he initially set out to do before he was drafted into the war. He wanted to help those shunned by the elite of society.

With Leah’s help, they looked into opening more homes for children under Grace’s foundation. Slowly but surely, he felt himself returning to the man he once was. A romantic who smiled more and wanted justice for those who couldn’t get it themselves.

Tommy knew that keeping himself busy with things he believed in and his family, he could keep the shovels away. But he wasn’t totally in the clear.

~~~~~~~~

It came via a phone call from Michael. There was trouble with Italians on the racetrack. Arthur was meant to be handling it but Michael was worried about the repercussions to their funds. They were still relying heavily on cash to get through the financial depression. And the tracks had made them a good sum of money to keep the rest of the business afloat. Now, Sabini’s men were making a try for their pitches.

It was almost instinct, Tommy wanted to instruct his cousin on what to do. He’d drive over, gun in hand and start dealing out threats to anyone who was challenging his business.

Then Leah passed by the open door of his study. She was carrying Molly upstairs, the little girl fast asleep in her arms. His wife glanced over and met his eyes. She smiled.

It felt like every nerve in Tommy’s body was fighting itself. His heart was pounding in his chest as he clutched the phone.

“Tom? Tommy? Are you still there?”

Forcefully, he hung up the phone and put his head in his arms. He needed to take care of his children. What if he went out to challenge Sabini and he was shot? What if that was his final action? Leah would be devastated that he hadn’t stayed honest, his children would be heartbroken. Molly wouldn’t even have a memory of him. Just like Charlie didn’t have a memory of Grace.

He felt it coming. As if he were standing on a train track and he could feel the vibrations of the incoming train. He could hear the loud whistle in the air. Could see the smoke curling over the horizon. But he couldn’t move an inch off the tracks. He just had to wait for it to hit him.

Fingers curling into his hair, his chest seized as he tried to take a few deep breaths. But it was futile. The panicked feeling was already upon him. The thing that was too powerful to fight. An old enemy.

Leah came back downstairs after putting the children to bed. She checked in on Tommy and found him slumped over his desk, hyperventilating. By that point, she recognized the signs that he wasn’t in medical danger, he was suffering from something completely in his mind.

“Tom…Tommy,” She hurried over to his desk. “It’s okay, I’m here.”

He didn’t answer, he hardly even moved aside from his panicked breathing.

Leah knelt down by his desk chair and put a hand on his shoulder. “I’m here. I’m here, Tom.” She whispered softly. “You’ll be okay, you’ll get through this, I promise. I promise. I promise you will.”

It took about two hours until Tommy was worn out. Wordlessly, he reached out to his wife. She helped him upstairs and into bed where he fell asleep rather quickly. Leaving her to watch over him with a worried look. She thought she would be enough.

~~~~~~~~~~~

The next morning, Tommy woke up very early. Leah was still fast asleep as he got dressed in an old button-down shirt, trousers, and bracers. He grabbed his flat cap and carefully shut the door behind him so he didn’t wake her.

The maids were preparing breakfast for the children so it would be ready for them when they woke for school.

“Francis, I’m going on a ride. Will you tell Leah when she wakes up?” Tommy grabbed his riding boots and coat.

“Of course, Mr. Shelby.”

He was about to leave out the door when he heard quiet footsteps behind him. Tommy turned and saw Charlie halfway down the stairs. He was dressed for school, carrying his uniform jacket and cap over his arm.

“Where are you going?” He asked.

“Why are you up?” Tommy skirted the question.

Charlie shrugged. “I heard you get up and I thought it was time for school.” He explained.

“It’s still too early, you can go back upstairs.”

But Charlie lingered on the steps. “Are you going away, dad?” He asked in a small voice.

Tommy’s brow furrowed. “Away? What do you mean?”

“Like…when you’ve left before.”

Father and son stared at each other in the foyer, neither exactly sure how to tell the other one how they truly felt. But their emotions had been simmering in their stomachs for so long, they were bound to come out eventually.

“Go and get your riding boots,” Tommy instructed, instead of really answering his son.

Charlie immediately perked up at the prospect of going riding. “Really?”

“Quickly.” Tommy nodded.

The boy dropped his jacket and cap to rush and get his boots.

“Francis, tell Leah that Charlie will be coming with me as well. He’ll be taking the day off from school as well.”

“Yes. Mr. Shelby.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zeus and Pippin were quite the opposites as far as horses went. Tommy’s large black gelding was steady but powerful. A thoroughbred-draft cross, he was built like a tank and carried himself as such. Pippin was Charlie’s little Haflinger pony. With his long, blond mane and round belly, he looked a bit dopey next to Zeus. Despite his short stature, he was still headstrong and could give Charlie a hard time. However, he never intentionally tried to harm the boy.

That’s why Tommy felt comfortable heading out on the trails with Charlie off the lunge line. Even if Pippin were to spook, his short legs wouldn’t carry him very far and he would most likely give up before he even tried running off. The only Charlie had to worry about was Pippin eating the entire trip along the trail. Bending his neck down to graze at the long grass or grabbing a bite from one of the bushes along the way. Charlie had to constantly pull him away from anything that looked edible.

The first leg of the journey, Tommy and Charlie was quiet. They listened to the forest creatures start to stir with the rising sun. Birds chirped good mornings to one another as they flitted from branch to branch. The brush stirred with movements of rabbits or squirrels or even the occasional fox. As the sun climbed higher off the horizon, the rays began to filter through the summer leaves. Dappled sunshine highlighting the shiny buckles and stirrups on the horses’ tack.

Tommy shed off his jacket as the air became warmer and started to buzz with the sound of insects. “Let’s stop up ahead.”

They came out of the forest onto a large hill. From the top of the hill, they could see a wide view of the British countryside. Fields and fences rolling over hills and dips in the land. There was a herd of cows a couple of miles away, slowly moving across a pasture.

Tommy dismounted and helped Charlie down as well. He offered his son water and a snack that he had packed before leaving. He felt that he would be out for a while, he needed some open air and space.

The two settled onto the grass, Tommy’s legs sprawled out as he propped himself up with his elbows to watch the sun continue to rise in the sky. “I remember taking you out in the vardo after Grace passed away.” He began to tell his son without prompting.

“I don’t remember that.” Charlie frowned as he opened the package of biscuits.

“No, you were very little. About Molly’s age. Could hardly talk. But you said Mumma.” Tommy kept his eyes out on the horizon, nodding absent-mindedly. “I told you that I was no good.” He recalled.

“Why?”

Tommy sighed and looked over at his son. Sometimes, when he woke up in the morning, he still expected Charlie to come toddling in. Still just an infant, hardly able to say much. When he came downstairs, sometimes it put Tommy in a shock. He’d gotten so big in seemingly such a short amount of time. As had Johanna. As had Molly. They all grew unbelievably quickly and Tommy was almost desperate to put a halt to time. Because what happened when they became teenagers or young adults? When they could truly see the kind of man he was? Or maybe they would hear stories about what he’d done in the past. What if they never wanted to speak with him again? What if they wrote him out of their lives?

When they were at the ages they were, Tommy could do no wrong. He was a saint because they didn’t know any better. Now he was just afraid of what would happen when they did know better.

“Because I thought I couldn’t take care of you properly.” Tommy picked a pine needle out of Charlie’s blonde hair. “Not without Grace, at least. I was very fortunate your mum came into me life. But I still worry that I’m not enough for you or your sisters.” He admitted, even if he wasn’t sure that Charlie would understand. It felt good to try and own up to his fears out loud.

“I was really sad when we were in America and you weren’t with us,” Charlie told him. “Because I thought that you didn’t care about me or Jo. But I think you care ‘bout us now.” Charlie said with a shy shrug. “’Cause you’re home more and you smile more. And you play with us and tell us stories. I like that.”

Tommy swallowed. “Yeah?”

“Yeah. I think it’s nice. Because I like when you’re here. And if you weren’t here I think Jo and mum and Molly would be sad. I would be sad too.”

“I like being here for you all too.” Tommy nodded and took a deep breath. That’s all he could do. Be there for them. Even if he thought he was a shit father, at least he wasn’t away. He was there and they would have memories of him. Memories of the promises he made to them.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dear Mr. and Mrs. Shelby, Mr. Charles, Miss Johanna, and Miss Molly.

If you’re reading this, then I’ve died. I’ve asked this to be mailed to you when I do die so that’ll be the only reason, you’re reading it. After the skin cancer returned, I decided to get my affairs in order just in case. Yesterday, the doctor said the cancer had spread to my organs. He used a big word but I’m not going to try and spell it out. You’ll most likely be notified of my funeral, just know it’ll be in Jewish customs. So, dress in something you don’t mind tearing. Ollie will explain everything to you when you arrive at Margate. Speaking of Margate, since I have no children to pass it on to, I decided to put my house in the Shelby name once I pass. I decided this a long time ago, but seeing the children enjoy the house for so many years, I figured it was only right. My lawyer will have everything in place, so no need to worry about that.

In the event that you’ll visit my grave in the future, I’ll ask this of you. Jews don’t really use flowers to give their condolences. Don’t want a bunch of dead flowers crowding my gravestone. Instead, it is custom to place a small rock on the gravesite. I’ll ask this of you.

Tommy, after a tumultuous length of time as business partners, I am happy to part as friends. I appreciate you allowing your family to bring me some joy in my years of retirement. Know that I went peacefully and I am now with God.

Regards,

Alfred Solomons

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Molly, Molly, careful!” Leah called out. “Oh, Tommy please go help her.”

Spring was budding in Margate as the Shelby family took the path to a familiar location. Nine-year-old Molly was being half-dragged there by their enormous bullmastiff who was only six months old but almost the size of what Cyril was fully grown.

Tommy trotted a few steps to grab the leash and rein in the excited pup. “Heel, Leo, heel!”

“I’ve got him, dad!” Molly complained even though her arm was getting tired from the puppy yanking on the lead.

“I know, I’m just trying to help.” Tommy got Leo back in place beside Molly.

“I’ve got a stone,” Johanna said, turning the smooth rock over in her hand. “I found it on the beach this morning.”

Molly gasped in a panic. “I forgot my stone!” She exclaimed.

“It’s okay, poppet,” Leah assured her. “We’ll find one on the way.”

“But it won’t be a pretty stone from the beach like Joey’s!” She protested.

“That’s alright.” Tommy placed a hand on his daughter’s shoulder. “Alfie would just appreciate the gesture.”

Finally, they arrived at Alfie’s grave. Already piled with rocks as they often visited and left their stones to commemorate him as he requested. Beside his grave lay Cyril who passed a couple of months after Alfie did. Almost in a fitting way of respect.

Charlie, who was seventeen, set his stone down first. He carefully dusted off the top of the headstone. They all had taken the loss in different ways. But all of them missed the larger-than-life man.

“Remember the time when we found a crab in a tidepool and it pinched Alfie’s thumb?” Johanna asked as she placed her stone atop the others.

Charlie chuckled. “That’s when Molly learned her first swear.”

Tommy couldn’t help but smile. He remembered Alfie swearing up a storm, trying to shake the critter off his hand. Leah was horrified when Molly started spouting off ‘fuck’ too thinking it was a funny word.

“Remember the time Cyril got sprayed by a skunk and rolled all over the carpet in the parlor?” Molly recalled.

Leah sighed. “The whole house stunk for weeks.” She leaned into Tommy’s side.

He wrapped an arm around her waist and kissed her temple.

“I liked playing pirates,” Johanna said. “That was the most fun.”

Charlie smiled. “Yeah then he made you captain and we ran aground.”

“Only because you weren’t looking!” His sister stuck her tongue out at him.

“I don’t remember it that way.” The teenager looked amused at the childhood memory.

“Alright, alright. Why don’t we leave Alfie to rest peacefully, and not listen to your bickering.” Tommy said and shooed them off. “Auntie Ada will be here soon with Pol and your cousins.” They were visiting so they could all say goodbye to Karl who had enlisted in the military and was now on his way out to fight in the war that had been looming on the horizon for years.

The three ran ahead with Leo, the puppy yipping at them.

Leah took Tommy’s hand in hers as they walked down the hill at a more leisurely pace. “He would be so proud of you, Tom.” She murmured softly.

Sometimes, Tommy couldn’t believe the time that had passed. His son was growing up to be a man. His daughters were growing up to be intelligent young ladies. They were educated and certainly more refined than he had ever been. But the most important part was they never had to see any of the atrocities he had. They grew into a comfortable life, only having to worry about their studies and friends. They rode horses and played the violin or piano. They smiled and laughed nearly every single day. And after every day, Tommy was there to wish them a good night. To tell him how much he loved them. And how proud he was of them.

And although he still struggled with his mind, Tommy knew that he was learning to accept things as they were. To cope, he looked at what he had been blessed with. Three lovely children and a beautiful wife.

Sometimes, Tommy still couldn’t believe that Leah was his. He assumed that she would’ve been gone years ago because of his behavior. But she stuck with him through thick and thin. Saw him at his lowest and helped him out of it. They knew everything about each other and it was so comforting to have someone there for him every night as he fell asleep. She kept the shovels away.

Neither of them was numb anymore. Not in the way they had been when they met. In fact, they were so full of life and love for their family and each other. Despite what was coming in Europe, they would always have each other and that meant something. It meant that Tommy had kept his promise to her.

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hotchley · 4 years ago

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aaron

"some of us grow up to catch them."

ssa hotchner. former prosecutor. unit chief of the behavioural analysis unit. best shot in the whole of the quantico building. dad to jack and his entire team.

aaron hotchner. just a boy, trying to make it through the day.

(alternatively known as the backstory, the moments between, and the hotch episode we never got)

chapter one: childhood

Aaron Hotchner was a child of darkness.

His mother would often fondly tell him how she was awoken from a nap in the late afternoon because of a pain in her stomach. A pain that his father had written off as her usual cramps, but she had decided wasn’t- because, she would whisper, a mother always knew- and got the bus to the hospital. The receptionists knew her well, Aaron would learn why later, and immediately checked her in. Ran their usual tests. Decided that although nothing seemed wrong, it would best to keep her in overnight, just to be on the safe side.

That was at six o’clock in the evening.

She told him that at four thirty-two the next morning, Aaron Michael Hotchner was born. The hospital was cold, the heating not working properly and the open window letting the cold November wind in. It was dark, the sun having set long ago, and the moon obscured by dark clouds. Victoria Hotchner didn’t feel the chill though. She couldn’t. Not when she was holding the most beautiful boy she’d ever seen in her arms. Not when the son she had wanted for so long was finally nestled in her arms, looking at her without really seeing, yet still in awe of everything. She had never been happier, she told him.

She never told him how she had also feared for both their lives. How her husband had come to the hospital with a storm brewing behind his eyes because he had a big trial that same day and his son was already causing problems. How she had looked at him, really looked at him when he’d departed to get some rest and just known that he was going to look exactly like the man that scared her more than anything in the world, and that terrified her even more because what if she couldn’t save him?

surprise!

the super long fic and the reason i wanted teen hotch and haley things was because of this! we were robbed of a backstory and we were robbed of a hotch centric episode that dealt with said backstory so i did it! i hope you all enjoy it!

Aaron Hotchner was a child of darkness.

That was at six o’clock in the evening.

Aaron loved hearing the story. When his father was at work- and he spent more time there than he did at home- he would often go up to his mother and tug on her dress. She’d smile, pick him up and deposit him on the counter before telling him the story again. He knew all the words and every single facial expression by the time he started school.

Michael Hotchner told his son a different story the day he turned eleven and bought home his first official report. The ones from elementary school hadn’t meant anything, so as long as he wasn’t causing any trouble, there weren’t any problems.

But this was different.

Aaron didn’t realise that till his mother asked him at dinner to collect his report card and show his father. He was a little nervous as he’d never felt like his father truly loved him. Not like the other dads at school that came and picked them up, or who watched them play football and cheered whenever they scored.

He didn’t sit when he returned with the card. It just didn’t feel right. His mother was biting her nails. He frowned; she wasn’t supposed to do that because it wasn’t good. He opened his mouth to remind her to stop but she shook her head. A minute gesture but he immediately clamped it shut. Turned his attention back to his father.

His father that was looking at his mother instead of his report card.

“Rebecca, go up to bed,” he commanded.

His mother’s eyes filled with tears. “Michael don’t hurt him. He’s just a child and it’s his first report card, he doesn’t understand how important these things are, but he’ll have improved so much by the time the second one comes out just give him a chance- “

“I have been giving this pathetic thing that you dote on so much another chance ever since he started school and he is still not the man I wanted him to be. So, go to bed before it’s not just him I’m angry at,” Michael cut in, voice low and dark.

Aaron had heard his parents argue a few times. Normally his mother just gave in and agreed to whatever it was his father wanted.

This time was different.

This time, his mother looked at his father, anger and defiance in her eyes, and spat one word at him. “No.”

His father struck his mother, who didn’t even flinch. Aaron yelled for her like he was the one that had been hit. Almost immediately, Michael rounded on him, towering over the little boy like a skyscraper. Aaron was shaking.

“Rebecca, go to bed. Go to bed or else you’ll be going to the hospital because you burnt your hand on a saucepan.”

Aaron looked at his mother, terrified as to what was about to happen but not wanting her to get hurt either. He begged with his eyes for her to obey her husband and protect herself, because this was what a man was supposed to do, look after their family.

“No,” she repeated. “You’re not going to lay a hand on him. If you want to hurt someone because of his report card, then you can hurt me.”

Michael Hotchner snarled and pushed her against the wall hard enough for her to fall to the ground. Aaron tried to run to her, but his father was stronger. He kicked and screamed but all that did was tighten the grip his father had on him. He stopped struggling as they went down the stairs to the basement.

It was dark.

It was so dark Aaron couldn’t see his hands in front of his face.

It was dark, and his father was close enough for him to smell alcohol on his breath.

It was dark and he could hardly breathe because he was so scared of what was about to happen.

He heard rather than saw his father remove his belt and fold it over once.

He felt pain course through his entire body as it made contact with his back. He fell to the ground, begging for mercy as tears started streaming down his face. It hurt. It hurt and he was in pain and he couldn’t breathe, let alone think, because every part of his brain was focused on trying to remember how to make a heartbeat when all it wanted was to give up.

“I should’ve have started doing this the day you were old enough to stand,” his father snarled, bringing the belt down again.

Aaron howled. “Please, I’ll do anything, just stop, please.”

“Shut your mouth. I should’ve started but I didn’t because your mother kept giving herself up to me instead and I thought that was because she had you under control and she was just waiting for you to prove yourself. Now I realise she was trying to prevent me from realising you’re even worse than her.”

He’d bring the belt down after each and every sentence. Aaron couldn’t find his voice. His words had devolved into whimpers.

“You were born in the middle of the night and that ruined my life. My client went to prison because you decided to make an appearance which meant that I couldn’t prepare for my trial. Yes, that was all your fault and I bet you didn’t know that because your mother only ever told you how she knew, right? Well that’s a lie. Your birth was not beautiful, it was an inconvenience to us all. You pathetic nighttime baby.”

Aaron didn’t move when his father left. He curled up into a ball, sobbing with one hand pressed to his mouth because if he made any noise, he knew it’d be even worse for him. It was dark in the basement, and for the first time, he was afraid.

His father didn’t him the next day. Or the day after that. His mother cleaned the blood up like it was just another fall off his bike and he can’t see any bruises on her. Part of him believed it never happened.

Then his father lost another trial and Aaron was again subjected to a night in the basement. The next day his mother covered the bruise on his face with make-up and he realised why he never knew. She learnt to hide it and he would need to learn too.

It was dark when his mother told him she was pregnant. He was still eleven years old and it had been four months and eleven days since his father had him for the first time. It had been four months and twelve days since his mother had told him the story of his birth.

“Are they going to be okay?” he whispered, unable to talk any louder.

His mother paused. “We’re going to make sure they are,” she said.

He nodded. He’d protect that child with his life. He didn’t know whether that would be called an exaggeration or not.

Sean Hotchner was born on the sunniest day of the year as the sun shone down, illuminating the hospital room and making his mother’s hair glow like a halo.

Aaron Hotchner was twelve now. And he already knew Sean was going to have a completely different life to him. Because his mother did not seem afraid as she passed her second son over to her husband. His father did not seem angry that Sean’s birth had called him away from work. He was smiling as he held him. And it was a genuine smile. Nothing like the horrible ones he got before he was beaten.

Aaron swallowed nervously. Rebecca Hotchner smiled and motioned for him to come closer, to stop hovering at the foot of the bed like he didn’t belong.

“You’ll protect him, right?” she asked, her smile never faltering.

Michael was still rocking him gently.

Aaron nodded. “I promise.”

He went over, wanting to see his little brother. His father was saying something. He strained to hear.

“I’m going to be there for you whenever you need me Sean. I promise. And I’m going to make sure you never end up being like your pathetic older brother, so you don’t have to worry about a single thing,” he was whispering.

Aaron felt his cheeks warm with embarrassment. Sean wouldn’t remember this conversation, but was this how life was going to be? Sean hating him just because his father told him that his older brother was a failure?

“Can I hold him?” he asked, making himself appear as confident and strong as possible. Maybe that would help convince his father that Sean had no reason to hate him.

“Just don’t drop him or there will be consequences,” his father said harshly.

Aaron nodded and took him, gently holding his head up. For a moment he was terrified he was going to start shrieking, but then he relaxed, raising one hand slightly. Aaron walked over to the bed and sat beside his mother. She let the new baby wrap his entire hand around her pinkie.

“He’s so small,” Aaron said, awed by his brother.

“You were like that once as well,” she said, fondly smiling.

Aaron’s blood ran cold. All of a sudden, he was back in that basement being beaten for being born and costing his father a trial. “I don’t think I want to hold him anymore.”

His mother’s smile faded, but she nodded and took him, nonetheless.

Aaron and Sean grew over the following years. But where Sean was sunlight and angels, beauty and softness, Aaron was darkness and demons, the ugly truth trying so hard to be concealed. He was hard eyes and unruly hair.

He was not his father’s son- he was told that often enough- but he was his father’s reflection.

Michael never laid a hand on Sean. Aaron knew this. Aaron knew that it was no longer his mother that was forced to take the beating because she had started to smile again. When he snuck into her room to get the make-up needed to conceal a bruise on his throat where his father had held too tightly for a few too many seconds, he found that it had not been touched.

It was a fact that filled him with relief and anger. His mother had stopped trying to fight for him. She had stopped because her and Sean were safe and that was all that mattered to her. So long as it wasn’t her or her darling being hurt, she didn’t care. She didn’t care that his ribs ached every time he moved, or that he’d been forced to sleep on his stomach because his back was a mess of bruises and scars that ached with every move.

He put the make-up back where he’d found it and went downstairs, shirt unbuttoned just enough to reveal the bruises there.

His mother didn’t make any comments, too busy watching as Sean made a mess of his breakfast. Michael started laughing, making a comment about he was such a messy little boy, but he still scooped the fallen food up and fed Sean a new spoonful.

Aaron clenched his hands into fists and took his own bowl of oatmeal. He tried not to think about how his father had forced him to eat the food he’d dropped off the floor like a dog.

Michael left moments after Aaron sat down.

“Please cover that up,” Rebecca whispered, taking the seat opposite him.

He met her eyes, not finding any pride when she flinched away. “Why? Are you ashamed of the marks he’s put on me because you don’t have to suffer anymore?”

There was a reason he was captain of the debate team despite being the youngest member at only fifteen.

Rebecca’s eyes filled with tears. “Aaron, my baby, I’m sorry. I never wanted you to think I wasn’t protecting you. I hadn’t realised just how bad he had gotten. If I had, I never would’ve gone out with my friends last week. I would’ve done what he asked and stayed home. But I saw him with Sean and stupidly, stupidly believed he could be redeemed.”

His mother hadn’t called him baby in five years. “What? But the make-up, it was still full.”

She shook her head. “Our complexions are slightly different. I just put the one you need out.”

His hands started shaking. This whole time he’d believed that she was letting him take the pain, this whole time he’d believed she didn’t care about him enough she’d been saving him from the full force of his father’s wrath.

“Aaron, I’m so sorry. And the moment I find a way out- “

“No, I’m sorry. I never should’ve doubted that you loved me. I should’ve realised that he would never stop hurting you but I just- “he couldn’t get the words out. He couldn’t explain how much he regretted every thought he’d had since Sean had come home from the hospital three years ago. There was nothing he could say to let her know just how much her sacrifice meant to him.

“My baby, I never once thought you didn’t love me. And I never wanted you to know how he continued to hurt me. But promise me this: if you ever get the chance to get out, take your brother and run. It’s too late for me to start a new life, but you, my sweet baby, you’re young. Smart. You could do it. There’s money hidden in the loft, you could use it,” she said, eyes taking on a new determination.

Aaron shook his head. He couldn’t leave her. Not now he knew just how far she was willing to go to protect him. “Mama I don’t want to,” he pleaded, feeling more like a child than he’d ever done before. He hadn’t called her mama in so long. She hadn’t called him her baby in an even longer amount of time.

“You have to. When the moment comes, you have to. Now get to school before you’re late.”

He tried. He really did. But the bus was late and then there was traffic and an elderly woman needed help crossing the street. And he ended up being late. The receptionist smiled sadly as she passed him his detention slip, mouthing sorry. He blushed, keeping his eyes on the floor. Was she mocking him? Was she going to start laughing because Michael Hotchner’s son was a pathetic failure that couldn’t even get to school on time?

When he walked into his English lesson, cheeks still flaming, the teacher tutted disapprovingly.

“Mr Hotchner, this sort of behaviour is unacceptable. What would your father say if he could see you now, turning up to school with hair like a bird’s nest and shirt scruffy?” she said, tone harsher than he’d ever heard it. Normally Miss Birch was the one person that let him just be normal, instead of the son of the best defence lawyer in the whole of their small town.

He looked up, trying to find any hint of a smile, but there was none. Her gaze was harsh as well. Swallowing the lump in his throat, he mumbled an apology and headed over to his seat. Somebody stuck their foot out. He only realised when his face hit the ground. The other kids started laughing. He gritted his teeth, clenched his hands into fists and tried to breathe. He wouldn’t respond. He couldn’t.

Instead he stood up, brushed the dirt off his faded jeans and took his seat. Miss Birch looked concerned, but her eyes seemed unfocused. He turned around and almost started crying tears of relief. Miss Birch hadn’t decided he was not worth her time anymore. The lesson was being observed.

“Aaron a word before you go please,” she called out as the lesson was ending.

Aaron nodded, ignoring the giggles and remarks of his classmates. When they had all left, some of them making rude gestures before running to their next lesson, he went up to the front.

“Is everything okay? At school, at home, just generally?” she asked.

Aaron didn’t know how to respond. On the one hand, he knew he wasn’t supposed to say anything against his father, that it was the dirty little secret him and his mother were forced to carry around each day because there was nobody who’d ever believe them, but on the other, Miss Birch looked like she cared. Like she could be trusted.

“Aaron? You’d tell me if something was wrong, wouldn’t you? Like if your brother was being difficult, or if you were worried about your dad spending so much time at work? Because all children of that age throw tantrums and throw things and your fathers’ job is time-consuming and difficult, there’s nothing to worry about there.”

The words had been on the tip of his tongue. If she hadn’t defined what counted as something being wrong, he would’ve told her how his father would take him down to the basement, beat him within an inch of his life and then hold Sean like he was a priceless antique.

But of course, she wouldn’t think that was true. Who would? Michael Hotchner was the perfect family man: a successful criminal defence lawyer with a beautiful wife that smiled and cooked and cleaned. One son that looked exactly like her, and one that would follow in his exact footsteps.

“Everything’s fine,” he choked out before bolting from the classroom. He ran into at least three people trying to get to the bathroom. When he finally made it, he hid in one of the stalls, head buried in trembling hands as he tried to quiet his sobs. As the pain in his chest started to lessen, and as his breathing started to feel natural instead of forced, his hands stopped shaking and he unlocked the door.

Stared at his reflection. How could nobody in their close-knit community realise he was just a broken teen that desperately needed somebody to help him scream for help? His eyes were too shielded for any teenager, the corners of his mouth permanently turned downwards. The circles under his eyes were starting to look more like bruises. His hair refused to cooperate with him, making him look even more run-down.

He thought of Sean and his innocent smile, light eyes and halo of hair. The exact replica of their mother. Whereas he was the mirror image of his father, right down to the glare they could pull out at any moment.

The bell signalling the end of break made him jump, but he ran to his next lesson before he could get into any more trouble.

That night at dinner, his father didn’t pay attention to him. He was too busy telling them all about the trials he’d had that day. And how he’d managed to tear the prosecution to pieces which meant his client had walked free. It made Aaron sick, and he was pushing the food round his plate, unable to find the energy to eat it.

“Why aren’t you eating? I worked hard to put this before you, the least you could do is be grateful for it,” he snapped.

Aaron jerked in his chair.

“Michael he’s a teenager. They have strange appetites,” his mother chastised gently.

Aaron wished he sounded more like his mother. She was gentle and calm and warm. But despite his efforts, he still sounded like his father: harsh and angry and cold.

“Well he shouldn’t,” Michael snapped.

Sean babbled away in his chair as Aaron stuffed dinner into his mouth, fighting the urge to gag as it caused the knots in his stomach to tighten and entangle even further.

Rebecca sighed. Aaron felt sick, but he’d finished eating. His father hadn’t mentioned the detention. Maybe he was safe. Maybe this time he didn’t know, and he wouldn’t be punished. Maybe he could go to sleep without turning onto his stomach, wincing every time the smallest amount of pressure was placed on his shoulder.

“I heard you got a detention,” Michael hissed when Rebecca excused herself to put Sean to sleep.

Aaron’s throat closed up. “I’m sorry,” he whispered.

“You’re sorry? What is that supposed to do? How are people going to respect me if my own son cannot follow basic rules? You got a detention because you were late. That’s stupid. You need to learn to be better. How have you not learned to be better yet?”

Michael was standing in front of him now. Aaron still hadn’t hit his growth spurt. He felt like the mouse in Sean’s favourite bedtime story. He swallowed, bottom lip trembling as he tried to find the words, the apology, the excuse.

His father kicked him in the stomach. He fell to the ground with a groan. He tried to cover the area with his hands but those were kicked away. As his father carried on, not once taking a moment to breathe, Aaron tried to resist the urge to be sick. That would only make things worse. He couldn’t take anymore. He tried begging for mercy, but that only resulted in a harder kick.

Only when he couldn’t form words did the beating finally stop. Michael spat on his face, before grabbing his keys off the table and storming out the front door, letting it slam behind him. Aaron remained curled on his stomach, only forcing himself off the ground when he heard the door to the nursery close. His mother would come down soon. He didn’t want her to see him like this.

He locked himself in the bathroom before she could come down and observed the damage. The purple and brown of the bruises that were slowly forming looked even uglier against the milky white of his skin, only made worse by the constant state of fear he found himself in.

It was only then he let himself vomit. He cleaned it up himself. His mother was waiting behind the door, face filled with anguish. He brushed past her, but she tried to grab his wrist. When he tugged it free, barely even having to try, they both froze. Was he turning into his father?

He bolted up the stairs, locked the door to his bedroom and hoped it was one of the days where his father stayed out till the morning. He didn’t pray, because he hadn’t prayed in a long time. But he hoped, and he dared to dream a little as outside the blue of Miss Birch’s eyes turned to the black of his father’s anger turned to the pink of his mother’s love turned to the red of the dried blood in the basement turned to the lightness of Sean’s eyes.

He was early that day.

His father still punched him when he got home from work because this trial had gone badly.

And Aaron had cried. Not from the pain. From the lack of it.

The next day, when one of the bigger kids tried to take his lunch, he held a little tighter. And when they punched his side, he punched back. It hurt him more than it hurt them, but he was so happy he could’ve cried. Because he felt something. He felt the most incredibly rush of adrenaline. He felt a surge of anger and he felt like he could take control of his life again.

He’d never been so scared yet fascinated by a feeling. It wasn’t fear, or guilt. Fear was when his hands trembled and his throat tightened, making it impossible to breathe. Guilt was when his mother would refuse to meet his eyes over the dinner table, or when he would feel a surge of jealousy as Sean ran into his father’s arms. It wasn’t quite happiness either. Happiness was when his mother would smile at him.

It was relief. His father may have taken his childhood, his innocence and all that was good from him, but he still had the ability to feel. Yes, it was pain and it hurt, but it was something. And as he was always being told, something was always better than nothing.

He wasn’t suspended. He was given another detention. He didn’t care, and he had to fight to keep the smile from his face. His father was on a business trip in New York- what a defence lawyer could be doing there when there was no sort of case was beyond him, but that didn’t matter.

What mattered was he could sleep easily. He didn’t have to worry about what would happen when he got home.

He forgot how his mother hated the moments where he was like his father. In his short moment of relief, he’d forgotten how hard his mother had fought to protect him and prevent him from becoming anything like his father.

She was sat in her husband’s armchair when he returned home, not really paying attention to Sean as she stared out the window, eyes fixated on a tree in another family’s driveway.

Aaron swallowed, the earlier relief fading as his entire body went rigid as though somebody had poured a bucket of ice water over him. “Mama I’m home,” he called out.

“Aaron!” Sean called out, tottering over to him, wrapping chubby (unblemished, perfect, unmarked) arms around his legs.

“Hey munchkin,” he said, ruffling his hair. He kept his gaze trained on his mother.

“Why did you punch that other student?” she asked, voice so soft he almost didn’t hear her.

He looked away, unable to form an answer. Why had he? He couldn’t say it was because he needed to feel something. Michael had been hurting Rebecca for a lot longer than he’d been hurting for and his mother had never once laid a hand on him just to feel something. And a small part of him worried that if he did tell her, she’d laugh. Treat him the same way his father did.

Sean looked up at him, eyes wide and so blue Aaron had to turn away. He didn’t want to look at his brother and only see his mother. “Are you sad?”

“No munchkin, I’m okay. Go and play, I’ll be up in a few minutes,” he said, forcing a smile. Sean didn’t seem convinced, but he left, running up the stairs and into his own room. Where he would never have to be afraid of his father storming into because he’d messed up again.

“You should consider yourself lucky your father is in New York,” Rebecca commented.

Aaron dropped his head in shame. He was a little taller than his mother, had been for a while, but he never felt smaller than when she was disappointed in him. No, not disappointed: ashamed. Which was almost worse.

“I know. And it won’t happen again,” he said.

“Thank you baby,” she said, pulling him into her arms. He buried his face in her neck, inhaling the familiar scent of lavender. Here was where he belonged. He wished his father would never come back. That he could spend the rest of his life by his mother’s side, never having to look over his shoulder for hands ready to grab the back of his collar.

He should have known that wishes made by people like him never came true.

He punched somebody else the next day. And the day after that. He punched somebody different, somebody that tried to hurt him or humiliate him each day. In a single week, he went from the quiet, well-respected young son of Mr Hotchner to the too explosive, dangerous man that would hurt anyone who got in his way.

Even Miss Birch had stopped looking out for him. She had stopped asking how his essay was going and recommending him books. She’d started keeping a firmer eye on him, telling him off when other students acted out as though she was warning that everyone would blame him the moment something went wrong.

He didn’t care. Hurting the bullies- because that was what they were, bullies dressed up as friends in varsity sport jackets- was the only thing that made him feel like he was alive.

Then his father came home, and he wished he was dead.

There was no warning. There was no movement from the living room to the basement. There was no lecture about how his behaviour was unbecoming and wrong for someone like him. There was nothing. Not even a car in the driveway to let him know his father was home. He closed the door behind him, having just got home from school and immediately knew. The house didn’t feel like the home he’d made it into over the past few days.

“Your mother took Sean to get some groceries,” Michael announced from the living room as Aaron placed his shoes back on the rack and hung his coat up.

“I didn’t realise you were getting home today,” he whispered, placing his bag on the floor beside the sofa, daring to venture further into the living room. His father looked up at him and Aaron immediately turned his gaze to the carpet. His father wouldn’t let any blood get on there. He’d made that mistake once before.

“Oh? What would you have changed if you had?” Michael asked sarcastically.

“I’m- I-” he stuttered.

His father’s hand striking his face sent him sprawling to the floor with a muffled groan. Although he was starting to tower over his mother, he was still shorter than his father. Shorter, thinner, smaller. Weaker.

“You what? Wouldn’t have completely humiliated your good family?” Michael shouted, pressing his foot down on Aaron’s hand as he tried to pull himself upright.

Aaron tried to nod, but the pain in his hand was excruciating. His father knelt down beside him, grabbed a fistful of hair and tugged. Hard. The movement forced Aaron’s head to tilt upwards as tears pooled in the corner of his eyes.

“You’re not my son,” Michael spat, tightening his grip as Aaron tried to close his eyes. “You never will be, and when I’m done with you, you’ll regret ever fighting back against anyone.”

He wasn’t sure what happened next. He knew he was punched, in the stomach and the face. He knew he was kicked in the stomach. He knew his father pulled a cane, meant to only be decorative from the cabinet and whacked the back of his legs with it. The world went black after the tenth strike with the belt.

When he woke up, it was in his own bed, in the same clothes he’d arrived home in. He tried to sit up, but the world immediately tilted as he did, and he was forced to lie back down for a few more moments. Eventually his room stopped spinning and he was able to walk over to the light and flick it on. He looked in the mirror. It wasn’t him that stared back. It couldn’t be. Both his eyes were black, his face an assortment of bruises, his mouth swollen. Hesitantly, he tugged his shirt off, and twisted round.

He couldn’t vomit. It was too disgusting. A mess of marks and scars, some of them still bleeding slightly. Not wanting to look for a moment longer, he pulled a clean shirt out of his wardrobe and put it on. He couldn’t handle the thought of looking at his legs.

He was surrounded by darkness.

It was nine in the evening. He’d been out for five hours. There was a note on the table. It was his mother’s writing.

Aaron, It was me that carried you up. Your father took Sean the moment we got home, so he hasn’t seen you. He said you were exhausted from debate club and that is the story you’re going to tell as well. There’s no food in the fridge, and I am sorry about that, but I couldn’t try and smuggle that past him. Please don’t do anything stupid. Mama

In a fit of anger, he ripped the piece of paper into shreds before flinging them everywhere. He ran his hands through his hair, angrily pacing the room. It hurt to move any part of his body, but he couldn’t just lay there, pretending to be asleep to keep his father off his back and keep his mother from worrying.

His window faced the driveway. The car wasn’t there. His father was out. His mother and Sean would be sleeping.

And he made his decision.

He’d never snuck out before. He’d thought about it, but he’d never been able to. He’d kept his trainers in his wardrobe though, just in case he ever needed to. And he’d never been gladder that he felt the need to be prepared for every single situation.

He knew exactly where he was going. He saw it every time he went to church. He’d memorised how to get there from the church, from his school, from his house. He knew roughly how to get there from Sean’s preschool and the park.

He walked in, suddenly keenly aware of what he was about to do.

“Aaron Hotchner? Has something happened to your father? Or your brother?” the receptionist asked.

Aaron swallowed. It was now or never. He took a deep breath. “My father has been abusing my mother since the day she said I do, and he’s been hitting me since I was eleven,” he blurted out.

She frowned. The Hotchner’s were a picture-perfect family, a dutiful and happy housewife, a strong man that was able to provide for his family’s every need, a house with a white picket fence and a beautiful garden. Sean was a perfect angel, always telling people about the adventures he’d had with his dad. Aaron was the problem. He was always getting into fights and being difficult. But if she didn’t deal with his claim, the consequences would be even more paperwork.

“You’d better come with me,” she sighed.

Aaron nodded, trying to not get too excited. But he believed in happy endings, however childish they may seem. And maybe she thought he was telling the truth. And if she thought that, then the police would listen as well. Then his father would go to prison, and Aaron wouldn’t have to leave his mother; they could be happy.

“Aaron?” Officer Cage, a middle-aged man that had served as a witness in many cases his father had been involved in, called out.

The receptionist turned. “He’s here because he claims that his father is abusing him and his mother.”

Officer Cage raised an eyebrow in disbelief. He knew children sometimes told tales, but Aaron was not a child, and this wasn’t a tall tale, it was slander. Rebecca Hotchner was one of the happiest women he knew; she was always smiling, always laughing and without a single bruise on her body. But he had a duty to do.

He sighed, sat down behind his desk and motioned for Aaron to take the other chair. Aaron, nervous and pale, sat down on his hands, trying to make the tremors less obvious. The receptionist vanished back into her office.

“You shouldn’t accuse your father of anything like that. It’s rude, disrespectful and frankly disgusting,” he said.

Whatever colour had been in Aaron’s face vanished. “I’m not lying,” he said, but he sounded desperate.

Officer Cage looked down at him. “This is a small-town Aaron. News travels fast. Your father is a noble and good man- he works as a defence lawyer and helps people being accused of things they aren’t even incapable of dreaming about. Your mother is a wonderful woman that loves her husband and is the perfect housewife. Your brother is a young and lively spirit who is constantly telling stories about the fun him and his daddy get up to. The only problem is you. You are the one that gets into fights and ruins his trials and upsets your mama. That’s not your father. So instead of making up lies to make yourself seem better, why don’t you take responsibility for your actions?”

“But I’m not making anything up!” he exclaimed, voice cracking as he started to cry. He fought to keep speaking. “He shoved my mama against a wall, and he whipped me with his belt and he slapped her and- and, there are so many things he did, and I can tell you all of them if you would just listen to me-“

“Aaron?” his mother called out. The receptionist was beside her.

“Mrs Hotchner,” Officer Cage greeted.

She raised a hand in acknowledgement. “Aaron what are you doing?” She had gotten dressed before coming down, the pearls- a gift from her father-in-law- she only wore when they were having a dinner party around her neck. The wedding band on her left hand seem to glow.

“I’m telling them the truth,” he said, pleading with her to do the same.

“The truth?” she repeated, head tilted to the side. He knew she was praying for her thoughts and assumptions to be wrong. But a mother’s intuition never lied.

“Mrs Hotchner, your son is claiming your husband has been abusing the two of you for a very long time. Is there any truth to these claims?” Officer Cage asked.

Aaron stared at her, eyes pleading, face covered in bruises as his hands trembled and legs threatened to collapse beneath him. He was the definition of desperate. He needed her to tell the truth. He needed her to back him up, for both their futures. He needed her to say the words that had only ever been whispered behind closed doors.

Rebecca sighed. And Aaron knew it was all over even before the sentence left her mouth.

“No, it isn’t. My husband has never laid a hand on either of us and I’m ashamed Aaron would even suggest such a thing. Officer Cage, I’m so sorry he wasted your time like this. We’re leaving now,” she said, grabbing her son’s wrist.

He flinched away from the touch. She only tightened her grip. “Do not make a scene. Not here, and definitely not now.”

He gave up and she dragged him from the police station. It took a few moments for his eyes to adjust to the darkness of the outside. It was then that he realised.

“You’re not wearing your walking shoes. How did you get here if you’re not wearing your walking shoes?”

There was only one vehicle in the car park. Aaron tried to run, but his mother tightened her grip to the point that he was afraid of losing circulation.

The drive home was silent. When his father commanded his mother to go upstairs and make sure Sean stayed asleep, she didn’t argue. She just nodded and turned on her heel.

Aaron kept his eyes on the basement floor. He could hardly breathe but he knew he just needed to keep his eyes on the floor and not make a sound. It’d be over before he could count to a thousand and twenty-four, and then he’d be able to breathe. He wouldn’t sleep but he’d be alive, and his mother would’ve avoided death for another day.

His father strode over and pushed him, so his chest was against the wall. He’d done that before. It usually meant he was going to whipped.

This time, his father grabbed his arm. Twisted it against his back. Continued to twist and push as Aaron cried out for mercy. As he forced himself to bite his lip to contain anymore cries. As tears started landing on the floor. He only stopped when there was a loud crack of a bone breaking and Aaron screamed.

He was shoved to the floor, landing on his injured side.

“I need a hospital,” he whispered, cradling his broken arm and potential dislocated shoulder.

His father snorted. “There’s no way I’m letting you anywhere near a hospital after the stunt you pulled today.”

“I won’t say a word I promise, I swear on my life, but I need a hospital. It’s broken, I can tell that much.”

“No. You’re not going anywhere. And you may swear on your life that you won’t say anything, but your life doesn’t matter to me, or to you. So, I’ll do you one better. Sneak into a hospital today or pull another stunt like that one at the police station and I’ll kill your mother. I’ll kill her and I’ll make you watch.”

He was toeing the line. But the pain was unbearable. He could hardly think.

“Papa please,” he begged.

Michael turned around and struck him across the face. Aaron screamed as pressure was added to his arm.

“How fucking dare you try and receive mercy by calling me that? You’re not my son. Only Sean has claim on that title. You pathetic baby.”

His mother called him baby when she wanted him to know she loved him. She hadn’t said it since she’d dragged him out of the station. He tried to pretend hearing the word coming from his father’s mouth- spat like a dirty slur- didn’t impact him. His father scoffed before leaving.

Aaron didn’t move from the floor the entire night. He only emerged when the light above the basement was switched on and he could see it from beneath the door. His entire body ached.

Nothing hurt more than his arm.

He could hardly move it. As he tried to get dressed, he found it almost impossible to push his arm through the shirtsleeve. When he finally succeeded, he felt as though he’d been stabbed a thousand times.

His mother refused to look him in the eye at breakfast. Aaron wanted to be angry at her, but he couldn’t. The pain in his arm made it impossible to feel anything. He wanted to tell her that he needed to go to a hospital, but his father’s words echoed in his mind. Part of him wanted to believe it was just another empty threat, but it was too risky.

Besides the pain was in his right arm. He was left-handed, and for the first time in his life, he was grateful for that. Maybe if he avoided placing any pressure on his arm then it wouldn’t hurt. Maybe if he didn’t think about the sound it had made the previous night then it would stop hurting. Maybe it wasn’t actually broken, and he had just been imagining everything. The thought almost made him laugh. Of course it was broken, it was just about what he was going to do.

“We need to talk,” his mother said when Sean left to pick up his own school bag.

Aaron wondered where the time had gone. Sean was four now. And he was still blissfully innocent.

“I’m going to be late,” he snapped, dumping his bowl and glass in the sink with an unnecessary amount of force. He was trying to not be angry at his mother, but it was hard, even if the pain made it difficult to focus on anything else. She was supposed to protect him. And maybe if she had said something, he would have been believed. But now he would never know.

“Baby,” she pleaded.

Aaron clenched his fists but softened his gaze when he turned to face her. “Mama, I’m so sorry,” he whispered.

She wrapped her arms around him, and he tried to ignore the pressure it placed on his arms. “Why?”

He pulled back. “I’d finally had enough. And I couldn’t just hide in my room, pretending that our family was perfect when- when he’s a bastard and I hate him.”

Rebecca shushed him. “Don’t say that. I think the same, but you can never say that again. And you can never go the police, do you hear me? You are never to do that again. You’re going to graduate from high school, get out of this town and do good things. And Sean is going to be fine.”

“But what about you?” he whispered.

“Like you said, you’ll be late,” she said pulling away from him.

He sighed, grabbed his bag- using his left arm and his left arm only- before he started walking.

Whispers seemed to wrap their tendrils around his body as he walked to his locker and he felt the heat rise to his cheeks. He knew word about what he had done had travelled, and that everybody knew what had gone down. He knew that nobody believed him- and who would, he was just the rascal son that got into too many fights and carried a darkness that nobody wanted to see around. He knew that even the make-up could not hide the damage of the previous day and he knew that he would need a hospital if he wanted to keep his arm.

The first lesson of the day was Maths. He couldn’t meet anyone’s eyes. He only answered when his name was called on the register. But as they were handing in their assignments, it felt like his teacher wanted to say something more as they hovered by his desk. For a moment, it seemed like they were going to say something. Aaron looked up; eyes wide. They shook their head and moved on. He sighed.

Of course they weren’t going to say anything. Because the receptionist had been right. Everyone perceived Michael Hotchner was the perfect family man, with Rebecca his loyal and perfect wife, and Sean the spitting image of his mother: innocent and good. Aaron was the one surrounded by darkness. He was the one that got into fights and undermined what was said. He was the one that struggled to listen in church. His mother had been right to deny his claims. They wouldn’t have been believed.

As he stood to leave, he knew his teacher was watching him. And the look in their eyes told him everything. A part of them doubted the rumour that he’d gotten into another fight with someone that could beat him easily. A part of them was wondering whether he had been telling the truth. He hesitated before leaving.

They didn’t say a word, and he speed walked the whole way to English. The pain in his arm, the pain that had slightly reduced when his maths teacher looked like he was going to save him, was back full force.

“Aaron,” she said, and he tried to not wince. He hated the way his name sounded. He would forever associate it with the darkness of the basement. His father’s mocking tone. His mother’s desperate one. Sean’s innocence as he mispronounced it, not yet understanding how bad his brother actually was.

His arm was in agony. He lifted his head, and tried to focus on her face, despite the fuzziness in the corners of his vision.

“Did you want me to do something?” he asked, ever the perfect gentleman.

No amount of make-up could fully cover the bruises on his face. She let out a soft gasp, clearly not having heard the rumours flying round about the fight he had gotten into that had led to the damage.

“Oh Aaron,” she whispered, sounding so much like his mother it was almost painful.

Aaron clenched his fists. “Miss?”

The black spots were growing bigger.

“Right, of course. Could you hand these out please?” she asked, clearly not following through with what she’d initially wanted to say as she fumbled with the books on the table.

He had no idea where they were. The room was starting to go blurry and his sleeve felt wet, but he needed to be perfect. He held his arms out, hoping he was following the sound of her voice properly and that she was stood, not sitting, otherwise his arms would be in the completely wrong place.

They were in the right place, but thirty copies of a book were hard to carry. They immediately fell to the floor as an extreme pain shot through his arm, causing him to groan and try to grab it with his other hand. Blood was pooling on the sleeve. He could feel it. His father was going to kill him. No, not him. His mother.

He let out a soft cry as he let go of the books.

His teacher stepped forward. “Aaron?” she asked, wondering, not for the first time, if the Hotchner’s were as perfect as everybody pretended, they were.

He crumpled to the ground as the last book dropped beside his head.

She screamed.

There was a white light in the distance. He winced, so used to the darkness that he had forgotten what brightness looked like. He slowly made his way towards it, knowing a better life had to be at the end of it. Even if it was death, anything was better than the pain he couldn’t escape.

“Are you back with us now?” a woman asked, gently.

He frowned, tried to lift his head to look around. “I don’t know where I am,” he rasped, head falling back on the pillow as he failed to support his weight. The ceiling was white. Everything was white, from the walls to the sheet beneath him.

“That’s okay. You’re in the hospital. You passed out in school. Your arm is broken, and you have a mild concussion. Can you tell me the last thing you remember before waking up?”

His mind was stuck on the word hospital. He couldn’t be. How did he get there? Who took him? “Hospital?” he repeated, vaguely aware he must’ve sounded stupid.

“Yes dear, the hospital. You passed out. Your arm is broken. Now can you answer my questions?” her voice was gentle, not demanding, but his mind once again focused in on the word hospital. He frowned, trying to remember why it would be such a big deal, but his brain felt like one giant piece of cotton wool.

“Don’t push yourself too hard. You’ve got all the time in the world,” she said.

He mouthed the word hospital to himself.

“Aaron?”

Hospital. Aaron. Broken. Concussion. The words bled together into nothing. Until they stopped and the jigsaw came together.

“I can’t be here,” he whispered.

“Sorry?”

He shoved the sheet off and swung his legs over the side of the bed. He tried to stand but the nurse was quicker, pushing him back onto the bed without touching the arm wrapped in a cast, preventing it from causing any more damage.

“I can’t be here. I have to go. I need to get home before my dad. Please, I have to. You have to let me go now or else he’ll get home and realise that I’m not there and then my mama is going to get hurt so I need to go, please just let me up. And don’t tell him I was here. You can’t tell him I was here,” he said, not even realising one arm was in a cast.

“You can’t leave. You passed out from the pain of breaking your arm and not getting medical help immediately. Passing out gave you a concussion. So, unless you give me the answers to my questions without being prompted, you’re going to be here.”

His eyes widened, vaguely resembling dark holes as the light reflected onto them, making it seem like the stars shone in his pupils. His whole body was trembling, but he was doing his best to hide it. He stared at the nurse, desperately trying to form a sentence.

“He’s going to kill her. He’s going to do it. He said it. He told me. Yesterday, he said that if I went, if I left and went to a hospital and got it looked at then he’d kill my mama. He said it. I’m not lying. He’s going to kill her and make me watch so I need to get out because Sean needs her and she’s too good to die and she thinks I’m angry with her but I’m not, I’m angry with him for being a sick bastard and hurting her, only nobody believes me because he seems perfect-” he said, voice rising in volume as he became more and more distressed.

“Aaron calm down. You’re safe. So is your mother. Your parents and brother are waiting outside for you. They’re all very concerned. I’m going to go and tell them you’re awake okay? Nothing bad is going to happen to happen anyone, especially not because of your father,” she said, keeping her voice even.

All the fight left him as tiredness overwhelmed him, the brief adrenaline rush wearing off as he realised there was no escape. There was no way of saving his mother.

The nurse left, stuffing her hands into her pockets so nobody commented on the shakiness. She’d heard about what the elder Hotchner son had done- everyone had- but she hadn’t believed it. People spread rumours about that poor boy all the time. She didn’t think he was a good child, not with all the fights he got into, but that seemed real. Like he was genuinely scared. Not just trying to pass the blame.

“Is he okay?” Mrs Hotchner asked as soon as the nurse was within sight.

“We had to do a minor surgery and his arm has been put in a cast and he has a concussion, but yes, he’s fine. We’ll have to keep him in overnight for observations and his arm is badly broken so he may have to be in the cast for longer than most people, but he should be right as rain within the next six months,” she explained as they walked to the room.

“He wasn’t giving you any trouble, was he?” Mr Hotchner asked. His tone was teasing, an easy smile on his face, but she shivered. If what Aaron had said was true, then her next words would determine his fate.

“Of course not. He’s been the perfect angel. Haven’t you Aaron?” she said, as they entered the room.

Aaron visibly flinched. She noticed his father frown and immediately stepped in.

“The drugs we put him on to carry out the surgery made him a little jumpy. Look Aaron, it’s your mama and papa. Do you want to sit up for me? They can make you feel more comfortable and we can work out what happened together.”

He nodded, nothing more than a puppet.

Both his parents entered, his mother sitting on the bed whilst his father leant against the wall, watching the scene unfurl.

“Hi baby,” his mother greeted, smiling softly as she ran a hand through his hair, pushing the messy bangs off his forehead.

“You’re okay,” he whispered.

“Of course I am. All I did was bump into the table, remember?” she said.

He frowned, then made a soft sound of realisation. “Oh. Yes, I remember.”

She didn’t want to interrupt them. She wanted to run from the room and go to Detective Cage and convince him that Aaron Hotchner had been telling the truth, that his father was indeed an evil man that needed to go away. But then Michael looked at her, eyes cold and paralysing. She swallowed. Nobody would believe her. And then Aaron would suffer even more.

“Do you remember how you ended up here?” she asked, taking the chair beside the bed when it became clear that his father wasn’t going to sit down.

“I remember Miss Birch asked me to hand out some books, but when I took them, they were heavy and it really hurt my arm,” he said.

She nodded. “That’s good. Can you tell me how you ended up breaking your arm?”

The silence that fell across the room made her wonder if something terrible was about to happen. Michael finally looked at his son, who’s eyes widened in fear as he turned to his mother, who had a death grip on the boy’s hand.

“I got into a fight,” he said, voice flat. “I didn’t tell my parents my arm hurt because I didn’t want to disappoint them or bring any more shame on the family than I already had. And it only hurt a little bit, so I didn’t even realise it was broken until today.”

The words sounded rehearsed and she wanted to ask him again if that was genuinely what had happened, but she couldn’t make the words come. Instead she nodded, then said the doctor would probably want to ask some questions as well.

Aaron simply nodded, not meeting the looks of either of his parents.

His father didn’t hit him till the cast came off.

But Aaron didn’t feel any pain. Or fear. He still got into fights as well, as the story of how he’d broken his arm flew round the school like wildfire and people started to look at him with fear instead of disgust wasn’t enough to deter some of them. Miss Birch stopped flying to his defence when people did dare to attack him, but he didn’t care.

He was seventeen years old and he was a child of darkness.

Then Haley Brooks entered his life in an explosion of brightness and sunshine.

He hadn’t meant for it to happen. He was well-aware of her existence- he lived in a small town; how could he not be- but that didn’t mean he ever spoke to her. In fact, Aaron didn’t even make eye contact with her. But everything about Haley was different. For starters, she’d not grown up in his small town. Her voice was softer, less heavily accented. She smiled at everyone and treated them with kindness, not knowing who the good families were. And if she did, she didn’t care. Her eyes were bright with life and love.

She reminded him of the sun. He avoided her because of that. He knew that she heard the rumours about him and the stuff he’d been up to and he was well-aware that, despite her cheerleader status, she wanted to be his friend. He wanted to be her friend as well. But he couldn’t. She was kind and gentle. He had his father’s glare and harsh tone. All he was capable of was destroying beautiful things like Haley’s lightness.

But he couldn’t stop himself from watching her. They went to the same church service. She always wore something pastel. Whether it was pink or purple or blue, it didn’t matter. It was always a modest, respectful dress that covered her shoulders and reached her knees. That only made him feel even more disgusted for looking over.

Haley always paid attention. She never saw him watching. Her sister did though. Jessica Brooks would glare, and Aaron would turn away, cheeks going red as he pretended to be intently listening to what the priest was saying. He never was. He hadn’t since he was old enough to understand that his dad wasn’t supposed to hit him, and that the Bible didn’t say it was okay.

He knew that the Brooks family were protective of their daughter. He knew they looked at him in church and sighed to themselves, praying for the Hotchner parents.

So no, it hadn’t been his intention to ever meet Haley Brooks. But then on the last day before summer, he’d been trying to find his mock trial team- they were the few people in school that he actually got on with as it didn’t matter who his dad was, they just liked him because he was a good prosecutor- and he’d accidentally stumbled into the theatre club.

It was like something out of a film. He’d never actually been in the drama department. But it was alive. There were colourful props strewn everywhere, costumes and fabric covering all four walls of the classroom they were turning into a set. Students laughing and smiling, just casually flicking through their scripts as they did warm-ups, ready for whatever it was they were doing.

His eyes met Haley’s and he immediately knew he needed to get out of there. He reached behind him, trying to find the door handle but unable to grasp anything but air.

When she held up her hand, stopping her friend from finishing her sentence, the room fell silent as everyone realised exactly who had walked in.

Aaron felt his cheeks warm as Haley Brooks walked over to him, holding a book full of music.

“I didn’t mean to interrupt anything, I’m really sorry. It’s just- I was looking for the erm, the mock trial team and obviously this is not the mock trial time so I’ll just-” he trailed off, mesmerised by the brightness of her eyes and it was only then that he realised that he couldn’t open the door because his hand was too far away to grab it.

“You’re not interrupting anything. Why don’t we talk outside?” Haley said, with a soft laugh as she reached around him to open the door.

Feeling rather stupid, and incapable of saying no to her, he nodded, following her into the corridor.

“I’m Haley,” she said, once they were a good distance away from the rest of the theatre club.

“I know. I mean, I’m not stalking you, it’s just that I’ve seen you around and you’re pretty popular so- I’m Aaron,” he said, hating the sound of his voice. When had it gotten so high-pitched?

“I know you aren’t stalking me. I see you at church. You make your brother laugh. He’s a cute kid.”

“Yeah,” he agreed.

“So, theatre huh?” Haley said after a short silence.

Aaron’s eyes widened. “Oh. No, I genuinely was looking for my mock trial team, I’ve never been good at acting or singing or dancing.”

“Well, we always need more boys, regardless of their abilities. We’re doing the Pirates of Penzance next year. You should consider it. I’m sure I’d be able to whip you into shape if you wanted to give it a go.”

She pressed the book into his hands, and he tried to not react as their hands brushed. Her hands were delicate, soft, and he found himself trying to memorise the warmth that had spread up his arm when she touched him.

“Maybe. Well, I should really find the mock trial team and your friend seemed really excited about whatever it was she was saying,” he said, already backing away from her.

“Bye Aaron!” she called out.

He didn’t mind the way his name sounded when it came from her. The light, floaty feeling speaking to her had given him lasted till he got home.

There was no way his father would let him participate in theatre. Not as he entered his senior year, when every last bit of energy was supposed to be going on making sure he got into a good college so he could go to law school.

It didn’t stop Hotch from stuffing the script down the side of his mattress, learning the words to some of the more suitable for his range songs under the covers at night, the soft light emitted by the torch he’d smuggled out of the basement his only guidance.

It didn’t stop him from auditioning either. Nobody seemed to be commenting on his sudden change of extracurriculars, and his mother hadn’t mentioned any concerns either. There was no way his father would know until it was too late for him to stop. And the smile on Haley’s face when he appeared on stage, awkwardly introducing himself and hesitantly singing through his audition piece was worth the embarrassment of going on stage.

His father hadn’t been at home for most of the summer. He was there even less now school was back in session. Aaron had been reaching for the make-up less. But he couldn’t kid himself into thinking his father was changing. It was just that most nights when his father got home, he was already in bed. And the times that he wasn’t, his father seemed to forget he existed.

Aaron knew his father was having an affair. Everyone did. It was why he didn’t care when his father would come stumbling through the door, drunk out of his mind, sobbing and begging for forgiveness. That only happened when Sean was at a friend for the evening. On the days where they were all sat around the dinner table, the seat at the head of the table empty, he would lock himself in his office, pale and underweight.

He got complacent and left the songbook on his bed. Rehearsals had begun, but as Pirate No.4, he spent most of the time watching Haley dance round the stage as she sung like an angel and laughed with her friends. Since joining, he hadn’t gotten into a fight- he didn’t need that pain to feel anymore- but he still wasn’t trusted by many people. They all thought he was plotting something. Haley made a point of sitting with him every time they took five though.

The rehearsal went well. Haley spoke to him multiple times, even going as far as hugging him when he finally, finally got one of the few dances he had to do right. He’d grinned at her, almost melting into a puddle when she smiled back unabashedly, saying he was already doing so much better than before. He walked home with a smile on his face, feeling like he was floating on a cloud. He couldn’t wait to tell his mother how Haley was. Sean had a playdate and his dad had mentioned some sort of appointment- which he couldn’t even bring himself to care about- which meant he could do whatever he wanted for a few hours.

But when he unlocked the door and wandered into the sitting room, the cloud he’d been floating on vanished underneath him and he felt his throat closing up as he struggled to find the oxygen he needed to live.

His father was holding the songbook.

“Go down to the basement. Take your shirt off and wait for me. You have three minutes,” he rasped.

Aaron ran, hands trembling as he tried to undo the buttons of his shirt. His father came down two minutes later, and he hadn’t managed to undo the last one. Without any warning, his father bought the belt down on his back. Aaron screamed. It had been so long because his father had been so weak from whatever it was that was happening.

“What were you thinking? That you could hide this from me forever? You’re supposed to be becoming a lawyer, Aaron. You don’t have time to be prancing around on a stage like a fucking idiot. What is everyone going to say when they find out Michael Hotchner’s son is spending his time with scum like that? You will shame this family more than you already have. Tomorrow, you are going to go down to the theatre club, and you are going to tell them that you can’t be in the show. I don’t care what your reasoning is. Just do it. Do you understand?”

Aaron whimpered. “Yes sir,” he mumbled.

His father knelt beside him, yanking his hair so they were making eye contact. He could smell the alcohol on his breath, see the ashes on his blazer. It didn’t make sense. His father always dressed impeccably. He would never let anyone see a speck of anything- whether it was ash from a cigar or dust- on him.

“What was that?” his father snarled. and all thoughts flew from his mind.

“I said yes sir,” he repeated, loud enough for his father to release him and leave.

When Aaron finally gathered the strength to leave the basement, he threw his ripped, bloodied shirt in the bin. Haley had said it looked nice on him.

But nothing about him would ever be nice. Or good. He was just a failure. A little boy that still, after everything that had happened, just wanted his father to look at him with pride in his eyes and say that he loved him.

His plan had been to avoid the theatre club, and everyone that was part of it, till they grew sick and tired of his absence and just gave his small role to someone else.

Haley had a way of disrupting his plans.

As he exited his last lesson of the day, ready to go straight home and lie to his father about how he had quit the theatre club, she grabbed his arm and started dragging him towards the rehearsal room.

“What are you doing?” he asked, more confused than anything else.

“I promise I’m not following you. I just wanted to talk to you without everyone listening and the walk to theatre club seemed like the perfect opportunity, that’s all,” she said, voice bright.

“Why do you want to talk to me? I swear I’m trying to learn my lines, I just- I don’t know,” he said, trying to ignore the pain in his chest as he realised they would go back to being strangers after he left. He had no other option now, he would have to tell her that he couldn’t.

“I know you are, you silly doofus. I want to talk to you because I like you and I want to hang out with you more, but you’re always vanishing before I can get a word in edgeways and I can never find you at lunch either.” She sounded disappointed. He didn’t have it in him to tell her that he’d deliberately memorised the places she would be so he wouldn’t run into her.

“Why do you want to hang out with me though? I mean, you’re really pretty and smart and could be friends with whoever you wanted, not that I’m trying to control who your friends are, but don’t you want someone more exciting?”

“I think you’re fascinating. You pretend to be all strong and tough and unapproachable, but I’ve seen you help old ladies with their shopping and I watch you with your brother. You’re a good person Aaron. And you’re cute.”

He had no response, rubbing the back of his neck as he stared at the floor in embarrassment. Haley Brooks thought he was cute. Haley Brooks wanted to be his friend. Haley Brooks was actually interested in him as a person but he was supposed to be quitting the theatre club forever and forgetting that she existed.

She seemed flustered by his lack of response, but he had nothing he could say, so they walked the rest of the way in silence. He held the door open for her, trying to remain neutral when she flashed a genuine smile at him- exclusively for him.

“Hi Aaron,” one of her friends said as he went over to pick up his script.

He jumped, hitting his head on the shelf and dropping it.

“Oh my god I am so sorry that was not supposed to happen, it’s just that Haley mentioned how we’d been cold to you and I love her,” she rambled.

He moved back. “It’s fine. Honestly.”

“Are you sure? Because if it isn’t I have no problem taking you to the nurse,” she said, pushing Aaron’s hair off his forehead and wincing when she saw the bruise forming.

Aaron shifted away from her touch, not even registering the shelves digging into his back. Something about her distressed him. He searched the room for Haley, shivering when he realised she was too far away to see him pleading for her.

“I’m fine. Really. It’s just a bump,” he said, giving her an awkward grin.

“It looks like it’s going to bruise badly,” she pressed.

“I can handle it,” he snapped, gaze softening when her smile fell. He mentally kicked himself. She was just trying to be nice to him. She was one of the few people actually willing to talk to him. “I’m sorry. I just really don’t like people worrying about me.”

She nodded, not completely convinced. Aaron sighed, wondering what it would take for people to trust him. He hadn’t gotten into any fights since the start of the year, his grades were perfect and he wasn’t one of those annoying jocks that cat-called the girls. Well, he wasn’t even a jock but that was besides the point.

“Meredith you look like you’re about to give poor Aaron a heart attack. What on earth is going on?” Haley said as she came over.

Her friend- Meredith- ducked her head, dark brown locks falling in her face as she shifted her weight from one foot to the other.

“It’s nothing really,” Aaron reassured them both.

“I accidentally made him hit his head on the shelf,” Meredith confessed. When Haley looked shocked, she placed her hand on Aaron’s arm. “But he’s fine. Aren’t you, Aaron?”

Aaron nodded, moving his arm till her hand fell limp by her side as he angled his body so he and Haley were stood closer to each other. Meredith’s face was unreadable.

“If the three of you are done, then can we begin? Mr Hotchner, I need you to stand in for Thomas as he’s sick. Miss Brooks, that means teaching him the waltz. Can you manage that?”

Aaron’s heart sped up so much he was surprised nobody else heard it. Haley grinned, grabbing his wrist as she dragged him- for the second time that day- to somewhere he didn’t want to be.

“Of course I can,” she said, winking at him.

He was going to be sick. They were stood so close to each other and she was holding his hand, placing it on her waist, and she was so small compared to him, and her eyes were so beautifully bright. He could see the light sparkling in them, the hope that something would come from the time they were spending together not hidden because why would it be? She placed her own hand on his shoulder, mouth twisting downwards when she realised how thin he was.

“Are you okay?” she whispered as the music started, then stopped as she completely missed her cue.

He shook his head. He was going to destroy her. He was supposed to have quit, but instead he was stood, with his arms around her waist, knowing fully well he could overpower her if he wanted, and she wouldn’t even be able to scream for help. His father was going to kill him if he found out he was there.

No, not him. His mother.

“I can’t be here,” he whispered, pulling away from Haley.

“Aaron?” she said, voice so gentle, soft, untarnished by his darkness.

He shook his head. He hated his name. He hated the way she said it; like it was something to be treated with care. Like it was something that mattered.

He couldn’t look at her. He couldn’t look at anyone.

He ran from the room, not paying attention to where he was going, just knowing he had to get away from everyone before they viewed him as weak and pathetic, before they realised what was going on and got him in even more trouble.

He didn’t stop running till he reached the boy’s bathroom and had locked himself in a stall before sliding against the wall, finally letting the pain overwhelm him. His back hurt, the wounds still fresh, but he couldn’t bring himself to care as he finally sobbed for everything he had already lost and would only continue to lose.

“Aaron? You don’t need to come back to rehearsal or even leave the stall if you don’t want to, but do you mind telling me what’s going on? Everyone- I’m really worried about you,” Haley called out.

“Ha-Haley?” he stuttered between sobs.

She knelt outside. “Yeah. It’s me. What’s going on? Is it something I did?”

“No! It had nothing to do with you. Well it had something to do with you but you weren’t- you should go back to rehearsals. I’m sure they need you a lot more than they need me.”

“It’s kind of you to say that but they don’t. And I’m not leaving without you. So we can sit here for the whole hour and a half that remains, or you could tell me what’s got you so worked up and we can sort it out.”

She said it like it was the simplest thing in the world. She was just trying to make him feel better, but her words only made him sob harder. Haley was so innocent. So good and precious. What right did he have to take that from her?

“Aaron? Did I say the wrong thing?” she asked.

“No. No, you didn’t you never say the wrong thing, it’s me. It’s always me. I’m the problem,” he said, wondering why he hadn’t shouted at her yet.

“You aren’t the problem Aaron. Just let me help. Tell me what’s going on. Please.”

And there was something about the desperation in her voice that made it impossible for him to reject her.

Before he knew what he had done, he’d unlocked the door and turned his back to her, displaying the years of abuse to her like the mythology book kept on display in the library.

Haley’s gasp was muffled by her hand. He felt rather than saw her step forward and he closed his eyes, forcing himself to remain still when he felt her touch one of the welts, still not fully healed.

“Oh my god. Aaron who did this to you?” Haley whispered.

“My father,” he choked out, more tears spilling onto his cheek. “And if I don’t quit then he’s going to hurt me even more and I don’t know if I’m strong enough to handle that,” he confessed.

“Why haven’t- does anyone know? Have you told anyone?” Haley asked.

Aaron laughed, but it sounded bitter. “I tried to tell the police. My mom- who he hits as well- turned up and told everyone that I was lying. He broke my arm and I passed out in school because he wouldn’t let me go to the hospital.”

He wasn’t sure why he’d started telling her, but her hands were warm on his back and she made him feel safe. Besides, now that he’d started, he found himself incapable of stopping. It was like the dam had been broken and the pain of the past six years was finally letting itself be known.

“And you know what hurt the most? The fact that everybody suspected something was wrong. Everybody. But they didn’t do anything. They didn’t even try. I was just a kid Hales. Was I really worth so little to them that they didn’t even want to try?”

She wrapped her arms around his bare stomach, pressing herself against him, and after the initial shock that she hadn’t walked away, or laughed in his face, or told him he was just being an attention-seeking liar faded, he realised she was crying.

“Haley?” he asked, turning.

She wiped her eyes. “I’m sorry. You’re the one who’s been suffering for so long. I just- how could they not believe you? You’re a child. And even if you weren’t a child, they should’ve done something more.”

“It’s a small town. And my father is powerful. I know that. But I always hoped- I don’t know what I hoped.”

“You hoped that they’d do what was best for you. And they suck for not even trying. So tell me. What can I do? Is there anything I can do to help?”

He shook his head. “You already said you believe me. That’s enough.”

“No, it’s not. It’s the bare minimum.”

He bit his lip, unsure how to respond. “Can you tell them that I just can’t commit to the play? Not when I have to do debate, mock trial and get my maths grade up? Please? I just- I can’t look at their faces without wanting to stay.”

“Of course I can. And if there’s anything else please just tell me. Regardless of how stupid you think it might be,” Haley said.

Aaron nodded, not quite meeting her eyes before buttoning his shirt again and leaving.

“It’s not your fault,” Haley whispered as he brushed past her.

He froze. “Please don’t tell anyone about this. About any of it.”

“But Aar-”

“It won’t be me he hurts if anyone finds out,” he said.

Haley paled as realisation dawned on her. “I don’t like that I have to let you go back there.”

“I’ll be okay. I’ll be fine so long as you don’t say anything to anyone.” It was manipulative of him to say that, but he needed to make sure she wouldn’t go behind his back and do the one thing that would guarantee pain.

She sighed, and he relaxed. “Okay.”

He slipped past her without another word.

That evening, his father stumbled home even later than usual. Aaron couldn’t find it in him to be sympathetic when he started painfully coughing during dinner- so much that he had to leave the room. Nor did he care when he came down the stairs to get a glass of water in the middle of the night and he realised that his father’s clothes seemed to be much looser than they had over the summer.

It was what he deserved.

Aaron hadn’t known about his father’s many affairs till he heard some of the old ladies gossiping in church about how maybe Mr Hotchner should listen to the preacher talking about family loyalty instead of claiming he was spending late nights preparing for trials when he was actually doing unspeakable things with the women there.

When he’d turned around, they’d immediately tried to backtrack and undo their words but it was too late. The moment him and his mother were alone- ironically when his father was working late- he asked her. Directly and without hesitation; the way Hotchner men did. She slammed the plate she was washing down with unnecessary force and said it was the one thing she’d never wanted him to find out about.

Deep down, he understood why she’d let the affairs slide: it was the same reason she let everything with his father slide- for the sake of giving her children a shot at having a good life and future- but he’d been angry.

How had he not known? There had been no reason that the work he spent hours doing at the office couldn’t have been done at home. There had been no reason for someone in New York to demand Michael Hotchner represent him in court. How was this the one secret the entire town had managed to keep from him? Part of him wanted to find the women his father had had these affairs with, just to find out who they were and how they could do that to his family. But he knew his mother would prefer to live life blissfully ignorant to who these women were, if only so she could do her weekly shopping in peace, so he stopped himself from doing anything.

Then Sean came into his bedroom in the middle of the night asking if mama and papa still loved each other because when papa came home early from work- Aaron had been in school, preparing for the mock trial and pretending he couldn’t hear the theatre club laughing- they’d started shouting and mama was crying then papa threw something because when he came downstairs, she was on her hands and knees, trying to clean the glass up.

Aaron let Sean sleep in his bed, watching the steady rise and fall of his chest the entire night. And he made his decision.

That Saturday, only five days after he had quit the theatre club, his father- dressed in his best suit- announced at breakfast that he needed to head into the office because they had a big trial on Monday.

Aaron told his mother that he was going to the library to study. He’d gotten good at lying to her. He didn’t go to the library. He put his trainers- the same ones that he’d worn when he’d gone to the police- on and waited till he couldn’t see his mother in the window. Then he’d dropped his bag- full of random pieces of old homework- in the bushes and headed in the opposite direction of the library, towards his father’s office.

The building was locked. The lights were off. There was no sign of life. He wasn’t there. Aaron wanted to leave, to turn around and return home, make up some bullshit excuse about why he wasn’t working in the library and lock himself in his room, pretending that he was still blissfully unaware of what was going on.

But the image of Sean forced him to keep going. His father had taken the car. There were only so many places in their small town a person could do, it wouldn’t be that hard to find him.

Aaron did eventually find his father. He was leaving the doctor’s office, holding a file. He was walking quickly with his head down. Nothing like his usual self that took long strides and kept his head high. No, what Aaron was witnessing was a man that didn’t want to be seen by anyone. With a frown, he crept closer, careful to blend in with the small groups of people going about their day.

Michael Hotchner did stop by his office. Aaron knew the small garden area was situated behind it. He snuck into it, watching intently as his father furiously scribbled notes on files and reorganised his entire drawer, removing the few personal items he’d kept in there. Aaron frowned. Maybe the woman he was having an affair with liked to rifle through the items in his drawers and he was trying to hide something. It would make sense for them to meet in his office. They could draw the blinds, lock the doors, and nobody would dare comment on his behaviour. It made Aaron sick, the way everyone knew what was happening but did nothing to stop it because his father was a defence lawyer. He used to think it was noble to defend people who were being falsely accused of heinous crimes. Then he grew up and his view changed. It wasn’t noble to let guilty people walk, and the only time he would ever be able to find it acceptable was if it was the only work available.

Nobody turned up. His father stopped shuffling papers, shoved everything off the table in a moment of anger and buried his head in his hands. Aaron almost stopped breathing. He’d never seen his father cry. Suddenly, everything he’d done felt like a bad idea. But he couldn’t move. He found himself watching as his father fell to his knees, sobbing. He didn’t dare breathe as he shuddered, the last tears escaping before he gathered the papers, slid them into the drawer and righted the photo of his family (Aaron wasn’t in it) before leaving.

Something made him carry on, as opposed to turning back. He watched as his father drove to the other side of their small town. At first, he was confused. There was very little to do over there.

Then he saw the building his father was going into and the world turned upside down.

The building he was walking into was a legal office.

A legal office where Mr Oliver worked.

Mr Oliver who wrote the wills of every single town resident.

His father was dying.

His father was dying, and he knew he was dying. He knew he was dying, and that was why Sean had heard their parents shouting. He was dying, and that was why he was coming home late, reeking of alcohol, looking too thin and too tired.

Aaron didn’t feel anything. He’d spent his entire life waiting for his father to die so he would be free. And now it was happening, he didn’t feel any sort of triumph or happiness. He just felt cold.

Still in shock at his discovery, he walked home, dazed and almost forgetting to pick up his bag.

“How was your study session?” his mother asked as he walked back into the house.

Sean was reading something, not even aware that his brother had returned.

Aaron swallowed. “How long have you known about dad?”

His mother sighed. “Aaron, I told you to drop it. I don’t want to know who they are.”

“Not the affairs. How long have you known he’s dying for?”

Victoria’s eyes widened. But she wasn’t looking at her son. She was looking past him. Aaron spun round.

His father had come home in the time that they’d been speaking. And he no longer looked like a man that wanted to blend in and be forgotten. He looked angry. Angrier than Aaron had ever seen him. Angrier than he had been when he’d gone to the police.

Aaron braced himself for the blow. He braced himself for the pain, the verbal lashing, the pain.

Anything and everything.

But it never came.

His father just turned on his heel and went upstairs, gently closing the door to his office. Aaron watched, unsure how to feel. When he heard the click of the lock, he turned to his mother. Her face was pale, one trembling hand pressed to her forehead.

“He’s really dying, isn’t he?” Aaron whispered, the knowledge finally hitting him.

His mother nodded. “It’s lung cancer. The doctor said he has a year, maximum, left.”

Aaron turned away. That bastard didn’t deserve any of his tears. But he wasn’t crying over the fact that he was dying. He was crying over the fact that Sean wasn’t going to understand what was going on when it happened, and that he would be forced to go through life without a father. Because no matter what had happened to him, his father had never once laid a hand on Sean. Ever. And he couldn’t even bring himself to be bitter because Sean was his little brother, and he would die before anyone could hurt him.

“Aaron? I’m going to go and speak to your father. Make sure Sean doesn’t do anything please?”

He nodded and went and sat beside Sean. “Hey buddy. What are you reading?”

“Snow White. Are mommy and daddy going to be okay?”

The words got caught in his throat. He coughed, careful to not let any tears escape. “Yeah buddy. Yeah they are. Everything- everything is going to be okay.”

“Okay. Will you read to me? I like the way you do the voices more than the way mommy does.”

Aaron nodded, barely even registering what he was reading.

The next day, he was still numb. He still couldn’t understand why his father had never said anything or why he’d just walked away, despite the obvious anger he was feeling. Nothing made any sense, but he was sick of feeling empty and he’d gotten so good and controlling his impulses and he didn’t want to undo all of his progress, but he needed to feel something, anything other than the coldness and-

“You don’t understand! Aaron didn’t do anything wrong. He punched that student because they were trying to take a freshman’s lunch money. A freshman. They’re a senior, they shouldn’t be picking on freshmen. Why don’t you punish them instead?” Haley shouted at the principal.

Aaron had indeed punched a senior in the face because they were trying to bully a freshman. Unfortunately for him, the teachers hadn’t seen their darling quarterback do that. They had seen Aaron give him a bloody nose. Haley had apparently seen anything, as she just happened to be walking down the corridor.

“Miss Brooks, calm down, now. Jason is a star student, well on his way to getting a football scholarship from some of the top colleges of the country. I understand that yourself and Mr Hotchner have been spending time together, but there is no excuse for these lies,” he said harshly.

Aaron looked down.

Haley scoffed. “I am not lying!”

“Hales it’s fine. Just leave it.”

“Thank you, Mr Hotchner. You’re suspended for the rest of the week. As you had been doing much better before this, we’ll refrain from putting it on your permanent record. But if I receive any hints that you’re slipping back into old habits, then I won’t hesitate. Do you understand?”

“Yes sir,” Aaron answered meekly.

“We’ve informed your parents. Your mother asked you to go home yourself. Can you do that much?”

He nodded, then left.

“This isn’t fair,” Haley said once the door had closed.

“My dad’s dying,” he blurted out. “He- he’s got a year. Maximum. It’s lung cancer. Something to do with the cigarettes- I don’t know. But that’s why I punched him. I’m not evil. I’m not like him. I just- I needed to feel something and that was the easiest way, but I don’t want to have to do that every time I’m numb because then I’m going to turn out like him and-”

Haley embraced him, soaking the front of his jumper with tears. “I’m so sorry. And I know. You could never be your father. You’re too good. Too loving. And I will spend the rest of my life convincing these people to see what I see. I swear.”

“Thank you Hales,” he whispered, inhaling the soft scent of her perfume. It was comforting.

His father dragged him down to the basement when he got home from work. Aaron cowered beneath him, despite probably being heavier than him. Now that he knew, it all made sense. The lack of care in his appearance. The weight loss. The paleness of his skin.

“You’re a disappointment,” Michael snarled.

Aaron recoiled. It had been so long since his father had insulted him like that.

“You’re a little bastard, with no concept of respect.”

Haley wasn’t afraid of him.

“Everything you do ends up inconveniencing me, making my already long list of problems even longer.”

Haley wanted to be his friend.

“You’re just an evil boy and I feel sick every time I see your face. Sometimes I wonder if your mother cheated. There’s no way I could’ve ever made a child like you.”

Haley thought he was a good person. Haley defended him, with no regard for the impact it would have on her. Haley wanted everyone to see that he was caring and lovely.

He heard his father remove the belt. “Selfish, ugly, arrogant-”

He never managed to finish his sentence, a coughing fit overtaking him as he dropped the belt, which landed on the floor with a thud. Michael started wheezing. Aaron launched to his feet, wondering if the doctors had been completely wrong. If this was the end, and if there was something- anything- he was meant to do.

“Papa?” he asked, hating how small he sounded.

“Leave. Just leave,” Michael shouted.

There was blood on his sleeve. Aaron’s eyes widened.

“I told you to leave,” Michael said, voice dangerously low.

Aaron ran. He ran from the basement to his room without taking a single breath. And it was only when he’d locked his bedroom door that he finally let himself cry. Not just because his father was dying. But because he’d never wanted to feel sympathy for that man. And because he didn’t know how he was going to keep his mother and brother alive when his father was gone.

In August, the doctors told Michael and Victoria Hotchner that he had a year left to live.

In November, his family buried him, his wife dressed in a modest black dress, head held high and proud despite the tear tracks on her cheeks. The youngest son didn’t know what was going on, pulling at his tie and shifting awkwardly. He’d clearly been crying though, if he didn’t know his daddy wasn’t coming home. The eldest hadn’t cried. He stared into the distance, something akin to relief on his face. The blonde girl from his school held his hand the entire time, only letting go when his mother called him up to say a few words.

In December, there was a noticeable shift in Aaron’s existence. He no longer turned up to school with bags under his eyes. He was more comfortable answering questions. His clothes stopped being so loose on him. He joined the theatre club again, taking on the role of Pirate Number Four.

His teachers tried to approach him about what had happened. He ignored every single one of them. It was the only time that anyone would look at him and say he was his father’s son. He was still his father’s image, but where Michael Hotchner had been cold and calculating, Aaron was soft and joyous. Kind and helpful. Unless someone asked if he wanted to tell them anything about his life before his father died. Then he would take on the same cold tone his father had used in court as he told them to fuck off.

In April, he made his one and only appearance on stage. His mother and brother were sat in the audience, cheering him and Haley on. When they took their final bows, Haley held onto his hand for longer than she needed to, only letting go when she had no other choice. When they were stood outside the desert parlour, waiting for their parents in full costume, she asked him out on a date. He managed to say yes, and everyone cheered as she kissed him.

In July, him and Haley were crowned prom king and queen, despite neither of them being aware that they were in the running. He led her round the dancefloor with minimal effort, as he was a proper Southern gentleman that knew how to dance. She looked beautiful in her gown. Aaron hoped the next time they danced together like that would be at their wedding. Because he loved her, with everything he was.

He told her that, as they snuck out for a moment alone and watched the stars. She looked at him with such adoration in her eyes and told him that she loved him as well. They kissed, not for the first time, but it still felt different.

There was a promise to have and to hold, in sickness and in health in that kiss.

In August, they moved to college. They weren’t living together and were taking a short break to see whether or not they clicked properly- Aaron’s idea because despite everything Haley had said, he still, in the back of his mind, had convinced himself she deserved better. She said she deserved someone that loved her for the person she was, without any judgement and that he was that person.

He wasn’t sure he was. He wasn’t sure that he ever would be. But he knew he wouldn’t destroy Haley’s lightness. He wouldn’t let himself.

Aaron Hotchner was an adult now, with stars in his eyes and light coursing through his veins. But as he would go on to learn, every candle eventually burnt out. And darkness never goes away. Not truly.

#criminal minds #criminal minds fic #criminal minds fanfic #fanfiction #aaron hotchner #aaron hotch hotchner #hotch #teen!hotch #haley hotchner #teen!haley #sean hotchner

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butterfliesluke · 4 years ago

Text

On the ice- Calum Hood x reader

Summary: you are a figure skater and happen to run into calum one morning at a coffee shop...literally.

An: this is my first imagine here on tumblr! So anytime you guys want to please leave requests in my ask box and I’ll do them! I already have a Michael x reader lined up after this:) -Tara

(Ps: I’m posting this at 4am on a school night...go me)

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

You have known Calum for a couple months after meeting him at a small coffee shop one morning while you were running late to practice. Your dream is to go to the olympics one day and you were very set on that goal so being late to practice was not an option but of course with your luck you would spill your hot coffee down the front of a young mans shirt while quickly walking out of the shop.

"Oh my god I am so so sorry let me help you." You said frantically trying to wipe the coffee from the young mans shirt.

"Hey calm down it's alright, no worries" the man said and gripped your hand and gave a large grin. You looked up and blushed at how you could be a figure skater yet so clumsy. He was very attractive and that just made it 10x worse not only that but you were staring at him.

"Again I'm really sorry but I have to get going!" You said realizing that you were still running late.

"Wait!" He called after you. "I see you're a figure skater! That's really cool maybe you can show me some of your routines sometime?" He stood a couple feet away from me as I looked down at the skating attire I was in blushing a deep red.

"Oh yeah of course! My names y/n." You gushed not knowing what else to say.

"My name is Calum. Um could I maybe get your number? Wouldn't want to miss seeing a pretty face again." He smirked as he got more confidence.

"Oh yeah sure!" You took the phone he was handing to you and created a contact for yourself. Hearing him call you pretty made year heart almost explode and you were having a very hard time not showing it.

"Text ya later then y/n." Calum winked and walked back to his car. You couldn't help but stare at his fit body and they way his shoulders moved as he walked.

Your thoughts were soon cut off with the sound of your phone getting a call.

Your trainers caller ID showed on the screen and you knew you were in for it when you got to practice.

When you got to practice all you heard was your trainers yells through out the rink.

"Y/n! You can't be late to practice if you want to make it to the olympics! It's as simple as that!"

"I'm sorry coach I'll practice extra this week I promise!" I stood looking at the ice below my skates.

"Sorry y/n I just want you to achieve your goal."

"It's okay I understand. Thank you for caring so much." You smiled at him and continued your routine.

You were elite already but You still had little ways to go till the olympics.

———————————-

Once my coach left for the night You decided to stay because You wanted to perfect your routine. Before You started You looked at my phone to make sure You didn't have any missed calls from anyone. You didn't. But You did have one test from Calum.

Calum: hey I don't know if you're free right now but would you like to show me some of you moves ;)?

God why did he have to be such a flirt?

Y/n: yeah! I'm free I'm actually at the rink right now if you'd like to come. Here's the address (address here)!

Calum: okay thanks! On my way.

His words made your heart flutter. But then you were nervous. You really want to impress Calum he is the first guy You have had any sort of attraction to in a while and You don't want to mess this up.

You decided to just skate around waiting for Calum so you weren't to tired to show him what You have been working on.

He's actually the first person to ever show interest in your skating. All your past friends have thought of it as weird and a waste of time and so have your parents. They would have rather You go to college but in all honesty You would rather make money doing something You love rather than something You hate.

Your thoughts were interrupted by the rink door opening and echoing through the building.

You stopped skating and looked towards the sound to see Calum.

He gave you a warm smile and put his hands under his arms for warmth.

You giggled and skated towards the rink entrance.

"Hey!" You smiled.

"Hey gosh how are you not cold in that thing?" He said mentioning towards your skating attire.

"Haha it gets kind of warm when your moving around so much I guess." An awkward silence filled the air around us until he spoke up.

"Can I see the routine?" You giggle and the heat rose to your face. "What do you skate for anyways. For fun?" He added.

"Oh well it is for fun but it's also my job. I'm a step away from going to the olympics."

His eyes got wide and his jaw almost dropped to the floor. This made you laugh and hold onto your stomach while trying not to double over from laughter.

"You're kidding right?" He smiled in amazement.

"Nope I'm 100% serious" You skated backwards a bit proud of yourself.

"Well now you have to show me!" He said walking carefully on the ice towards you slipping a few times.

"I will! Please sit down!" He pretended to slip again to scare you but ultimately went and sat down in one of the side boxes in the rink with benches.

He then sat down and then gestured to you as he was waiting. But even he himself couldn't tile himself seriously so you both ended up laughing again.

"Okay okay I'll show you now." You said still laughing a bit.

You stepped off the ice into the sound booth turning on the piano music you have set your routine to and then stepped back onto the ice. You really needed to impress him. You really liked him.

You took a deep breathe remembering the key you start on. A big part of figure skating is that you have to show emotion so you kept a smile on your face which wasn't hard, this is your passion.

You started off by skating backwards and then leapt into the air and landed with your leg lifted behind you. You started doing figure eights and doing poses with your arms while doing so still keeping the smile on your face.

—————————————

Your routine was almost over but this is where the piano music sped up into a faster tempo so you started spinning on one skate and you moved your leg to be in front of you and as the piano slowed you slowed and laid down in a pose on the ice.

There where a couple moments of silence before you heard loud claps.

You looked up with a couple tears in your eyes as you finally felt appreciated for what you do and not put down for what you do.

"Oh thank you." You said shyly as you slated over to the skating box Calum was in.

He immediately grabbed your arms and pulled you inside the box into a hug. You smiled at his scent and hugged back the smile never leaving your face.

"That was amazing y/n! You were so graceful and you're so good at what you do I could watch you figure skate all day!" He practically yelled.

"Oh well thanks again. I'm glad at least one person I know appreciates it." You mumbled but he still heard.

"What do you mean?" He said with concern.

"Well my past friends and my parents have never believed in my figure skating dream. They don't come to any of my shows or competitions. So every time I do have one no one is routing for me. No one is there to support me and sometimes it's really hard. Then you came in here and it's just nice to have someone appreciate my passion." You said as a tear slipped from your eye. He kissed your cheek to get rid of the tear and smiled.

"When is this competition you've been practicing hard for?"

"Next week. I'm really nervous for it. It decides if I go on to the olympics or not." You said.

"Well don't be nervous I'll be there. I wouldn't miss it for the world." He smirked at your face as you blushed a deep red.

"Thank you so much Calum! You have no idea how much this means to me!" You shrieked and have him a bear hug just for him to pull back and look into your eyes.

Your eyes went wide when you realized he was leaning it but your body urged you to lean in as well so you did.

Your heart melted at the touch of his lips against yours and you smiled into the kiss. You pulled away and he rested his head on your forehead. He brought his hands up to cup your face and he continued to look into your eyes for a few seconds.

" you know you look really beautiful in your skating dress?" He said with a small content smile.

You giggled in response not being able to think of words but he found it adorable.

"How about Tomorrow we go on a official first date?" He now had his hands on your waist and smiled at you with hope in his eyes.

"Calum I would love to but I have practice from 8am to 8pm I don't think you want to be out that late?"

"Who said? I'll even come to your practice tomorrow and watch princess. You aren't getting out of this one. You're to pretty for me to let go." He chuckles which made you laugh and playfully slap his arm.

"Hey! Stop flirting with me!" You laughed at his fake hurt expression.

"Well you seem to like it sunshine. Your face says it all" he said as you were still blushing as you probably were the whole time.

"Fine you got me there"

———————————

Your date with Calum the next day went amazing and you even planed a second date.

You were already falling for this man and you barely knew him for two days.

But I mean who wouldn't fall for Calum hood?

•••••••••••••

#ashton irwin imagines #fanfic #reading #writing #romance #calumthomashood #calum hood #luke hemmings #calum hood x y/n #5 seconds of summer #writers on tumblr #calum 5sos #michael clifford #5sos imagine #request #michael 5sos #luke 5sos #ashton 5sos #luke hemming imagines

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cristinablackthornkingson · 4 years ago

Text

What Might’ve Been, Part 4.

It is a cold Autumn day in the year of the Chinchilla when Alex receives a phone call that changes everything forever.

It’s been 6 months since he and Sophie met and became the very best of friends, over those 6 months they’ve become increasingly protective of one another, so when Alex answers the phone and hears Sophie crying, he immediately starts to worry.

“Alex.” Sophie sobs down the line, the minute Alex picks up.

“Sophie, what is it? What’s wrong?” He asks in a concerned tone.

“Alex I missed my period again and the last couple of mornings I’ve been sick, and I’m putting on weight too.” Alex clearly remembers Sophie anxiously telling him last month that she missed her period for the first time. She did admit she had recently had unprotected sex, but she didn’t want to face the possibility that she could be pregnant, so they both brushed it off as a fluke, But now she’s having other symptoms and missed her period again, it really can’t be a fluke at this point.

“Shit.” Alex swears. “You think you’re pregnant?”

“Yeah.” Sophie sniffs.

“Oh fuck.” It’s no wonder Sophie is so upset, for one thing she’s not ready to have a baby at 17, but for another the father of the baby, the only person she’s ever slept with, was gleaned last month. Sophie didn’t love him or anything so it wasn’t absolutely devastating, but it was still hard for her, as all deaths are since she’s an empath, and now she’s going to have his baby.

“Can you buy me a pregnancy test? I’ll send you the money, I just... I can’t be seen buying a test, people recognize me and I don’t want word getting back to mom and dad before I can tell them myself.” Sophie quietly and hopefully asks, running a hand through her hair.

“Yeah, yeah of course.” Alex immediately agrees. “Do you want come over to my place to take it? My mom’s out for a few hours, and I’m not going to dad’s till tomorrow, so you’ll have more privacy here.”

“Yes please.” Sophie sniffs, wiping at her tears.

“Okay, meet you at my place in about 20 minutes?”

“Okay.”

About 25 minutes later, Sophie finds herself standing in Alex’s en-suite bathroom, turning an opened pregnancy test over and over in her hands.

“Are you sure your mom won’t be back anytime soon?” She wearily asks Alex.

“Yeah I’m sure.” Alex assures her. Sophie nods and takes a breath.

“Okay, can you wait outside while I take this, then?”

“Of course, good luck.” Alex squeezes her hand before going back out into the bathroom and closing the door behind him.

Sophie lets out a shaky breath and pulls open the cardboard box, making sure to put in her bag and not Alex’s bin, doing the same when she rips the plastic wrapping from the test. She then takes the cap off, places it beside the sink and shoves the test between her legs, holding it there for the 8 required seconds. Once that’s done, she puts the cap back on and places it beside the sink, washes her hands and sets the timer for 2 minutes on her phone.

After a few seconds of waiting she realizes she doesn’t want to do it alone, and goes out to the room to wait with Alex.

“Well?” He asks, as she sits down to next to him.

“I dunno yet, I have to wait 2 minutes and I don’t want to wait alone.”

So they wait together, for 2 minutes, before Sophie’s alarm goes off.

“Come with me?” She hopefully asks Alex, after turning her phone alarm off.

“Of course.” He slips his hand into hers and they walk into the bathroom together. As they near the sink, Sophie’s grip on his hand tightens. She takes a deep breath, then looks straight down at the test.

‘Pregnant.’

Sophie can’t hold back her sobs, and Alex immediately wraps her in a tight embrace.

“It’s okay.” Alex quietly says. “I’m here, I love you and I support you no matter what.”

“Can I stay here a while longer? To think about my options and stuff?” Sophie weakly asks.

“Of course.”

A few minutes later they once again go back into the bedroom. At Sophie’s request Alex turns his TV on selects something at random to watch. They lie on the bed together, Sophie’s long blonde hair splayed across the pillow and her face scrunched up in concentration as she does research on options, on her phone.

They stay like this for about 2 hours, before Sophie puts her phone down and turns to Alex.

“I made up my mind, I want to place my baby for adoption, open adoption. I’m not ready to be a mom but I do want to carry this baby and choose their parents for them.” She quietly explains. Alex places his hand over hers.

“I support you, I’m here every step of the way, I’ll even help you look for parents if you want.” He tells her.

“Will you be with me when I have the baby?” She hopefully asks, unable to think of a better birth partner than her best friend.

“Absolutely.” Alex agrees immediately. It will be hard seeing Sophie in so much pain, but it’s part of his job as her best friend, to be there for the big moments like this.

“Thanks for being the best friend in the whole world, I love you.” Sophie softly says, moving in to hug Alex.

“Ditto.”

After another hour or so, Sophie decides to head home. On her walk there, she decides she wants to tell her parents now, instead of trying to hide the pregnancy until she just can’t anymore, she trusts her parents and has never kept anything from them before, she doesn’t want to start now.

When she arrives home, she leaves her bag in her room, then goes in search of her parents, hoping they’re home. Being High blade means her mom gets called out all the time for lots of reasons, so there’s a high chance just her dad is here.

However she soon finds them both in the kitchen, her mom cooking something at the stove and her dad standing behind her mom, his hands on her waist as he leans in to say something that makes her laugh. Sophie can so easily picture them 18 years ago when they were expecting her, they always tell her how excited and thrilled they were when they found out she was on the way, she wishes her own pregnancy were such a happy occasion.

Her dad is the first to spot her, lingering in the doorway.

“Ah we were wondering if you were ever going to come home again, I hope you didn’t get Alex into any trouble.” He teases, knowing how mischievous Sophie is, she looks so sweet and innocent, but she’s far from it, she and the very quiet and shy Alex make an odd team, but they also make sense.

“Oh Michael leave her alone.” Marie admonishes, turning to smile at her daughter, quietly noting the tear tracks on her face, trying not to let fear and worry for her daughter get the best of her.

“A-are you guys busy?” Sophie asks, her voice hoarse.

“Never too busy for you dear.” Marie softly says.

“Can we talk, please? I have to tell you something.”

“Of course, what is it?” Marie asks, taking a seat at the kitchen table and gesturing for her husband and daughter to join her.

Sophie had planned to beat around the bush a little before telling her parents the truth, but when sits down across from them, her nerves get the better of her and her plan goes out the window.

“I’m pregnant.” Sophie blurts out, wincing at how the words sound.

There is a tense silence for a moment, before Michael speaks up.

“Is it Alex’s?” He asks in a toneless voice. Sophie shakes her head.

“No, Alex and I are friends, best friends, but nothing else. It’s always been that way and it will always be that way, and besides, he’s gay.”

“Well then who is the father? And is he going to be involved? I hope he knows I’m not about to sit back and let the boy who knocked up my daughter, just walk away from the situation.” Marie’s tone is firm with more than a hint of anger.

“It’s no one you know, just a guy from school I had a bit of a fling with, we weren’t even really together, just went on a few dates, and obviously slept together. But no, he won’t be involved, he can’t be.” Sophie tells them, cringing slightly when she notices anger flash in her mother’s eyes.

“Is that what he told you? He can’t? That, my dear, is absolute bullshit. Who is this boy? I want to speak to him.”

“No mom, you don’t understand!” Sophie protests.

“Oh I understand perfectly well Sophia Amelia, don’t think you’re off the hook, I’m very disappointed in you but we’ll take about that in a minute.” Before her mother can start lecturing her again, Sophie interrupts her

“He can’t be involved because he’s dead, he was gleaned a few weeks ago, by Scythe Madison.”

The anger in Marie’s expressions is immediately replaced with shock and guilt.

“Oh.” She quietly says. “Oh Sophie I’m so sorry, I would never have asked had I known.” She reaches over to cover her daughter’s hand with her own. Sophie shrugs.

“It’s fine, it’s not like we were madly in love or anything.”

“Are you going to keep the baby?” Michael asks, speaking for the first time in a few minutes.

“i’m going to have the baby and then place them for adoption, I want to carry and bring this baby into the world myself, and choose their parents myself. I’m not fit to be a mom or raise a baby, but I want to do something for them, even if it’s just carrying them and giving birth to them myself, instead of letting The Thunderhead incubate the baby and place them with the right family.”

“Well, as your mother said earlier, I am disappointed in you Sophie. You were taught better than to have unprotected sex when you aren’t ready for a child, there are a lot of options for protection out there, it was very irresponsible of you not to use any of them.” Michael calmly says, looking his daughter straight in the eye.

“I know, I’m sorry.” Sophie admits.

“And I think I can speak for your father as well as myself when I say we aren’t thrilled about the pregnancy, we’re not mad or angry but disappointed.” Marie adds in.

“That being said.” Michael starts, his tone still very calm. “You’re choice to place the baby for adoption is a very mature one, and responsible, and for that I’m proud of you. We will support you every step of the way through this, you’re our daughter and we’re always going to love and support you.”

Sophie feels as though a weight has been lifted off her chest, she was so worried her parents would be furious with her for making such a big mistake. It is a relief beyond words to have their support.

Over the next few months, Sophie does her very best to hide her pregnancy, as the daughter of The High-Blade, a teen pregnancy would cause a lot of scandal and drama, and would lead to people questioning her mother and father’s parenting skills. They both made it clear that Sophie absolutely did not have to hide her pregnancy, they didn’t care what people said about them they just want her to be happy, but Sophie wanted and wants to keep this pregnancy as quiet as possible.

She does manage to hide the pregnancy, right up until 5 months.

On a warm day in March, when Sophie is meant to be studying for school but gets distracted reading about her parents history, online, her phone suddenly starts to buzz, continuously, with notification alerts.

With a confused frown Sophie turns away from her laptop and picks up her phone, her eyes widening when she unlocks it and sees the screen filled with notifications of people tagging her in posts, on social media. She clicks through the first one, and is brought to twitter. What she sees when the post loads, makes her heart sink into her stomach.

The post has been made by Caroline Thatcher-Edison, daughter of Scythes Margaret Thatcher and Thomas Edison, she’s 1 year Sophie’s junior and does not like her at all, Sophie’s mom says it’s because Caroline is jealous of Sophie’s fame as the first child born to two Scythes. (Although, technically Alex is the first, being a month older than Sophie, but since he was off grid for most of his life, the title still belongs to Sophie.)

Caroline has posted a picture of Sophie standing outside her home here at Fallingwater, in the picture Sophie is in the process of zipping up a baggy jacket, but with it unzipped you can clearly see her perfectly round stomach, under her white t-shirt.

‘Look what I found in the Thunderhead’s back-brain!’ The caption reads. ‘Seems like little miss perfect @SophieFaraday-Curie isn’t so perfect after all.’

“No.” Sophie quietly says, shaking her head in disbelief. “Oh no no no!” She opens up the other notifications to find that the picture has already blown up and received many responses, good, bad and in between.

Alex Kwon @AlexanderKwon 45 seconds ago.

‘Hey take this down, you have no business using a private photo of Sophie, you’re not even meant to be in the back-brain, you just admitted that your parents broke the law by letting you do something that’s only reserved for Scythes and their apprentices.’

Lucia Peron @luciaP 40 seconds ago.

And I’m suppose to care because....?

William Ford @WillFord 20 seconds ago.

Oh god I use to have a crush on her! Now she’s just used goods, ugh! It’s always the pretty ones, she probably let some asshole guy who doesn’t treat her right, knock her up, when she could have had a genuinely nice guy like me! What a slut!

Sophie feels sick to her stomach after reading the last comment, how can someone talk about another human being that way? Just as the tears start to fall, she hears a soft, familiar and comforting voice.

“Sophie.” She turns, and sees her parents standing in the doorway, both looking worried but also furious. Seeing them is a big comfort to Sophie, she needs them right now, more than ever.

“Mama, daddy, I....” Sophie begins, but breaks off as the sobs start to catch in her throat.

“Oh my love.” Marie softly says, quickly making her way across the room and embracing her daughter tightly, with Michael following behind.

“Lets put this away for now, hm? It’s not going to do you any good to read through the replies.” Michael softly suggests, picking Sophie’s phone up and placing it in her desk drawer.

“I-I knew Caroline hated me but why would anyone do something like this to anyone?” Sophie asks in a tight tone, resting her head against her mother’s chest.

“Oh Sophie, my sweet girl, I’m afraid there are a lot of nasty people out there who just want to hurt others. I think your father and I may have sheltered you a bit too much, we never wanted you to hurt like we did.” Marie quietly says.

“You’re the most precious thing in the world to us Sophie, always have been and always will be, we wanted and want to give you the most perfect, happy life possible, but I think in the process of that we forgot we all have to experience some degree of hurt at some stage, as a little girl we could protect you from the harsh realities of the world, but now you’re growing up and we can’t protect you quiet so easily anymore.” Michael says in a wistful done, brushing Sophie’s hair back from her face.

“How am I suppose to deal with this? I don’t really care what people think of me, but I don’t want to have to face those heinous comments everyday, both online and in real life.” Sophie asks, worried that this is going to be her life from now on.

“People will talk Soph, no matter what, I’m afraid there isn’t anything we can do to stop it, but we will be here to love you and support you through it all, and in time it will become old news and people will stop talking about it. It might take a couple weeks, or months or maybe even years, but it will get old eventually and will be forgotten about.”

Over the next couple of days Sophie’s Aunts Anastasia and Munira help her write an address to the public, confirming her pregnancy but also telling them that she’ll be placing the baby for adoption.

Of course, when people hear of this 2 days later, it causes a lot of uproar and focus on her. A lot of people think Sophie should have to keep the baby, as they are now technically next in line to be High-Blade, since Sophie has rejected the claim to the title herself. If the baby is adopted out and no longer legally Sophie’s child, then they will also loose their claim to the title.

Some people message Sophie and plead with her to place her baby with them, though it’s very clear they just want a famous kid, which is the exact opposite from the type of parents Sophie is looking for, she wants her baby to have a normal, quiet life with people who don’t care about her biological relation to the High-Blade.

2 weeks after the revelation, Conclave takes place, and of course Sophie’s pregnancy is the main topic of conversation among the Scythes.

As Marie and Michael make their way into the Rotunda to begin Conclave, they hear many comments about Sophie and her situation.

“Did you hear about Curie’s daughter?” Scythe Eisenhower asks Scythe Addams.

“No, what about her?”

“She’s pregnant!”

“No!”

“Yes, and apparently the father went and got himself gleaned just weeks before she found out she’s pregnant.”

“My god, what a mess!”

As they near the front of the room, they hear a conversation between Scythe Victoria and Scythe Bush.

“Is it true that The High-Blade’s daughter has gone and got herself pregnant?”

“Yes it is.”

“And she’s only 16?”

“Yes, and she’s not even keeping the baby, she’s placing it for adoption.”

“Disgraceful. she needs to step up and accept responsibility, stupid little girl.”

Michael has to physically restrain Marie from whirling around and yelling at Scythe Bush for calling Sophie ‘Stupid little girl.’

As Marie takes her place at the podium at the front of the room, Michael takes his seat in the middle of the first row, right in front of Marie. It’s where he’s sat every single Conclave for the last 16 years, since Marie became High-Blade.

The murmurs from the crowd immediately start to fade, when everyone notices Marie take her place, giving them all a hard stare.

“First matter of business today.” Marie begins. “You will all get my daughter’s name out of your mouths and stop your childish gossiping about her, you should all be ashamed, grown adults who are meant to be the most respectful people in our society, sitting around gossiping about a 16 year old, my 16 year old.

Let me make it clear right here and now that Michael and I support our daughter no matter what, Sophie made a mistake, as many young people do. By choosing to place the child for adoption, Sophie is not avoiding her consequences nor being selfish, she is doing the very opposite. She has chosen to give up nine months of her life to carry and bring her child into the world herself, and find the best parents the child could ask for.

She knows she’s not ready to be a parent, and by choosing to place her child with someone who is ready to be a parent, my daughter is making a very brave, noble, mature and selfless choice.

I will not make any further comment on the topic, so do not even think to ask. I am also banning this topic of conversation at Conclave, forever, effective immediately.”

Meanwhile, Alex is possibly the most angry he’s ever felt in all his life. He can’t believe someone would hurt his best friend this way, and that people would react so cruelly to such a tough situation.

“It’s just not fair mom! Why would people do this to Sophie? What has she ever done to deserve anything like this?” Alex exclaims in a furious tone, pacing around the living room while his mother tries to calm him down.

“Because people are assholes Alex, for no reason sometimes. I use to be one of those people, I use to like hurting people because it made me feel better about myself, it didn’t matter if the person had done anything or not, it made me feel powerful and in charge. You’re the one who changed that about me Alex, don’t ever forget that.” Olivia tells him, knowing that if she hadn’t chosen Alex over Goddard, and this all happened while Goddard was alive and she was still infatuated with him, she would have been one of the people talking shit about Sophie, too.

“You’re a Scythe can’t you glean them?!” Alex blurts out in a moment of frustration. Olivia’s heart feels like it stops for a minute, this is what she has always been afraid of, that Alex would turn out to be like Goddard, that though they share no biological condition, Goddard did impact and affect Alex during Olivia’s pregnancy.

“Alex, 1. I’m not a Scythe anymore, I gave that up for you and I don’t regret for a second, and it means I can’t glean anyone. And 2. Even if I could it be extremely immoral and unjust and exactly like something Goddard would do.” This immediately catches Alex off guard, and makes him realize what a horrible thing that was to say.

“Oh my god you’re right! Oh my god mom I’m so sorry, I-I didn’t mean it! I-I’m just so angry and want to do whatever I can to stop Sophie hurting and I... I swear I’m not like him!” The panic in Alex’s tone breaks Olivia’s heart, and she quickly crosses the room to pull him into her arms, running a hand through his hair and rubbing his back soothingly.

“I know kiddo, I know.” She softly says. “It’s okay, you’re fiercely loyal, like me. That’s a good thing, but you also have my temper, you just need to be careful and not act on spur of the moment thoughts, okay?” Alex nods, holding onto his mother tightly.

“I love you mom.”

“I love you too Alex.”

One month later when all they hype and gossip dies down, Sophie starts actively looking for adoptive parents for her baby. She’s decided to start her search on a website where expecting parents can look at perspective adoptive parents’ profiles, and choose to ‘Match’ with them, after which they can message privately, arrange to meet up, exchange more information and details, etc.

After about an hour of trawling through the website and not finding anyone she likes, Sophie comes across a profile that catches her eye.

The picture is of a woman with dark brown skin, long and curly black hair and warm, big brown eyes. Her smile is the first thing that catches Sophie’s eye, it’s so bright, full and real.

The name below the picture reads ‘Safiya Adel.’ Sophie clicks through to her profile.

The first thing she sees is a picture of Safiya sitting in what seems to be a living room, she is beaming into the camera as she has her arms around two dogs, a golden retriever and a border collie. This instantly makes Sophie like Safiya anymore, Sophie loves dogs and has plans to have many, many of her own when she’s a bit older and moves out on her own.

Below the picture are a few lines written by Safiya. They read

‘We haven’t met yet but I already love you and your child, and hold you close in my heart. I promise to give your child a happy and safe home, with a mother who loves them beyond all words and will do anything for them.’

It almost brings a tear to Sophie’s eye, it is so sweet and meaningful.

On the left of the profile is some information about Safiya, and preferences for a child.

Quick Facts About Safiya.

Age: 36.

Sex: Female.

Gender: Trans woman.

Preferences For a Child.

Age: Any.

Sex: Any.

Multiple Children: Twins, triplets, etc. And sibling groups.

Race/Ethnicity: Any.

Post Adoption Contact/Openness.

Open. (Open to all contact pre and post placement, open to meeting pre and post placement, regular visits, letters, photos, etc.)

Sophie then clicks through into the ‘About’ section, to learn more about Safiya, she’s trying not to get her hopes up but so far she seems like the perfect person.

Work and Education.

Education: Masters in Business.

Occupation: Business Owner.

Environment.

Country: Merica.

Region: EastMerica.

Relationship: Single.

Neighborhood: Modern.

Residency: House.

Pet(s): 2 dogs.

Children: None.

Sexual Orientation: Bisexual.

Sophie can no longer hold back her excitement, Safiya is exactly the kind of person she’s been looking for. She seems warm and friendly and definitely someone who could give a child a lot of love. She’s okay with an open placement so Sophie can still see the baby once they’re born, and she lives nearby so it won’t be hard to see the baby often.

She is about to click the ‘Contact’ button, when she hears a voice from the doorway.

“There you are, I was wondering where you had wandered off to.” Sophie looks up to see her dad coming into the room, wearing a casual white jumper and black trousers, he and Marie never really wear their robes at home, just casual street clothes, they started doing that when Sophie was a baby and if they wore their robes around her they would end up having to wash them almost everyday, so a few weeks after her birth they decided to just wear normal clothes at home, and put their robes on for gleaning, Conclaves, meetings, etc.

“Did this really use to be Aunt Anastasia’s room, when she lived with mom?” Sophie curiously asks, shifting to a more comfortable position on the small sofa in front of the fireplace.

“I believe it was, yes. What are you doing up here?” Michael asks, coming to sit next to Sophie.

“Looking for adoptive parents, I just found the most amazing sounding person, look.” Sophie hands her father her tablet that’s still open to Safiya’s page on the adoption website.

Michael takes a minute to skim through it, before turning back to Sophie.

“She does sound ideal, with her being so close by, just over in Eastmerica, it will be easy for you to visit her and the baby.” He notes, handing Sophie back the tablet.

“Yeah, that’s what I was thinking. I think I’m going to choose her, dad.” Sophie quietly says, hugging the tablet to her chest.

“She sounds like a great person.” Michael then reaches out and squeezes Sophie’s hand. “I’m so proud of you Sophie, and I love you so much.”

A while later Sophie sends a message to Safiya, asking to meet up so she can get to know her better, because she’s chosen her as her baby’s adoptive parent. Safiya is of course overjoyed and beyond thankful to Sophie, and happily agrees to meet her next week, at a café just 20 minutes from Fallingwater.

Marie, Michael and Alex all offer to go with Sophie to the meeting, but she insists on going on her, she wants to make a good first impression and not intimidate Safiya by bringing along A. Her mother, High-Blade of Midmerica. B. Her father, famous and well known Honorable Scythe Faraday, and C. Her best friend, the son of the former Scythe Rand and technically the late Scythe Goddard.

Before she knows it, Sophie finds herself sitting across from Safiya, getting to know her. She runs a clothing shop here in Eastmerica, a very successful and popular one, and seeing as she’s her own boss she can take as long as she feels fit, for maternity leave, once the baby arrives.

“I just want to say again how grateful I am to you for choosing me, I know it can’t have been an easy decision and I so admire your strength and bravery.” Safiya tells Sophie, in an admiring tone. Sophie blushes and shrugs her shoulders.

“I want to do what’s best for this baby, I want them to have as equally an amazing life as I did.

You’re welcome to be really involved in the rest of the pregnancy, you can come to scans and stuff all the time, and be at the hospital when the baby’s born, but not in the delivery room, no offense but I only want my mom and my best friend there, you can come in after the baby is born.

Also, right after they’re born, I want some time alone with them, just half an hour or so. I’ll always love this baby as my own, no matter what, before I place her with you and let you become her mom, I want a few minutes with her, a few minutes as her mom.” Sophie is beginning to get teary eyed, she really wishes she were in the right position to keep this baby, she loves them so, so much and the idea of placing her for adoption is just heart wrenching, but she knows she needs to do it, for the baby’s sake.

“Of course, whatever you want. The baby is still yours as of right now, and it’s your pregnancy, so whatever you say, goes.” Safiya assures Sophie, making her sigh in relief.

They talk for another hour or so, before they part ways. While Safiya heads out to her car, Sophie stay in the café for a bit longer, to process everything that just happened. She looks down at her stomach and places her hand on her bump, stroking it softly with her thumb.

“We did it baby, we found you the perfect home.”

The next 3 months pass by in a blur, and soon Sophie is just a week from her due date. She’s tired all the time now, and oddly desperate for the pregnancy to be over, and to go on a bit longer. On one hand she won’t miss the fatigue and how heavy the baby is, but on the other hand she’ll miss feeling her kick and having her with her everywhere 24/7.

Currently Sophie is standing at the kitchen sink, filling up a glass of water. however just as she turns the tap off, she is gripped with an immense pain in her stomach and back, a pain like no other. She imagines this is what it would feel like if someone stabbed her.

She bites her lip to prevent a groan or scream of pain, and grips tightly onto the edge of the sink, bending over a little and trying to breathe through the pain.

“Mom!” Sophie weakly calls out, as the pain starts to intensify. She’s really getting scared now.

“Sophie? Are you alright dear, what is it?” She hears her mom ask, and soon feels a hand land on her back. Sophie lets out a shuddering breath.

“I think I’m in labor.” She weakly says.

“Do you want to go to the hospital now, or wait a bit?” Marie asks. She had opted to have a home birth with Sophie, so has no experience in when the best time to go into hospital is.

“Now, I want something for the pain.”

Marie drives Sophie to the hospital, while Michael agrees to follow them in an hour or so, since Sophie only wants him there after the baby is born, and her labor could last hours.

On the way to the hospital she calls Alex, who agrees to meet them there. She also calls Safiya to let her know she needs to start making her way to the hospital.

Even with her nanites adjusted to help ease the pain, Sophie’s labor is still awfully painful and very, very long. She is beyond glad to have Alex and her mom with her, they’re such a huge comfort and help to her.

After 15 hours of labor, Sophie finally feels ready to push and decides to do so sitting upright at the end of the bed, Alex holding her hand and her mom helping to support her and keep her calm.

The pushing is very difficult, but Sophie’s midwife is extremely encouraging and doesn’t try to force her into positions that will get baby out faster.

“Okay Sophie I can see baby’s head now, nearly there.” The Midwife calmly says, two hours into pushing. Sophie feels some relief at having finally gotten somewhere and made some progress after so long.

She takes in a shaky breath, grips Alex’s hand and leans forward into her push, letting out a long and deep groan of pain.

“That’s it keep it coming sweetheart, keep it coming.” The midwife encourages as baby’s head slowly but surely starts to emerge.

After a few more seconds Sophie stops the push as her contraction ends, and takes a minute to catch her breath.

“Baby’s head is out now Sophie, well done, nearly there.” The Midwife smiles up at her, from her position crouched on the floor, ready to guide baby out.

“It really hurts.” Sophie says in a breathy, wobbly tone.

“I know but it’s almost over I promise.” The midwife tells her.

“You’re doing so well Sophie, so well. It’s almost over now, just a couple more pushes and it will be over.” Marie quietly says, wiping the sweat off Sophie’s forehead, with a damp washcloth.

“You got this Soph, you’re the strongest person ever, you can do it.” Alex encourages, squeezing her hand. The next contraction starts to wash over Sophie and she starts to push again, griping Alex’s hand so hard he almost yelps in pain.

“Oh god Alex I hate you!” Sophie wails as the pain intensifies.

“Me? Why me?” Alex asks in a confused tone.

“Because you’re a man and I hate men now.” Sophie pants, making Alex even more confused. He looks to Marie for help, she just smiles lightly.

“Don’t worry she doesn’t really hate you, I said the same thing to Michael when Sophie was being born, I didn’t mean a word of it and neither does she. People talk nonsense when they’re overwhelmed.” She gently explains.

“Okay Sophie, baby is out up to their shoulders now, one more big push and they’ll be here.”

Sophie groans, takes a deep breath and starts to push again.

A few seconds later she feels the baby slip out into the Midwife’s awaiting hands, and soon a sharp wail rings throughout the delivery room.

“Oh Sophie you did it! Oh you clever, clever girl I am so proud of you.” Marie says in a tight and teary tone, smoothing a hand over her daughter’s hair and kissing her temple.

“You did awesome Soph, really awesome.” Alex tells her.

“Boy or girl?” Sophie asks the midwife.

“Girl. Would you like to hold her?” Sophie nods and holds her arms out for the baby. The midwife carefully passes her up to Sophie, tucking a blanket in around the baby to keep her warm.

Sophie brings her baby to her chest and immediately falls in love with her all over again. She looks so much like her, with her skin tone, bone structure and eye shape, as well a few wisps of blonde hair. She is absolutely perfect.

Tears of joy well up in Sophie’s eyes and she pulls her baby closer and kisses her forehead.

“Hello.” She quietly says. “I love you. Letting you go is going to be the hardest thing I’ve ever done, but it’s not forever, we’ll still see eachother all the time. I wish I was in the right place to give you your best shot at life, i love you so much and I really want to be your mom, but you deserve just as happy a childhood as I had, and I can’t give you that.”

“Oh Sophie she’s so beautiful, well done my dear, well done.” Marie softly says, smiling down at her granddaughter as she rubs her daughter’s back soothingly.

“I can’t wait to be her favoriet cool uncle.” Alex grins at Sophie, his face lighting up when the baby wraps her little hand around his finger. “Aw see! She loves me already.” Sophie laughs and leans her forehead against Alex’s.

“You’re such a dork.” She sniffs.

“Yeah but you love me for it.”

After a few more minutes, Sophie asks one of the nurses to go bring Safiya in, to meet her daughter. The nurse happily obliges and a few minutes later, returns with Safiya behind her.

Sophie smiles at Safiya and gestures for her to come closer.

“Here, meet your daughter.” Sophie quietly says, carefully passing the baby to Safiya, who holds her with all the care in the world.

“Oh.” Safiya quietly says, stroking the baby’s soft little cheek. “Hello beautiful, I can’t believe I get to love you and raise you forever, I am one lucky woman.”

“Do you have a name for her?” Sophie asks, leaning back against the pillows. Safiya smiles and nods.

“Yes I do, Stephanie, Stevie for short.”

“Oh, Stevie Adel, I love it.” Sophie says.

“I’m glad, I want her to have a name you like, too. Sophie I really cannot even begin to explain how grateful I am to you for giving me the gift of this beautiful little girl, allowing me to become a mother.”

“You don’t need to thank me, just promise me you’ll give her the best, most happy life she could ever hope for.”

“Absolutely, you have my word.”

2 days later, both Sophie and little Stevie are discharged from the hospital. Safiya and Sophie walk out of the hospital together, Safiya holding little Stevie.

“I promise I’ll send you pictures as soon as we get home, and you can come visit whenever you want, okay?” Safiya asks, turning to Sophie when they reach the parking lot. Sophie nods.

“Yeah, okay. Thanks.” Safiya pulls her in for a hug, before making her way over to her car. She quickly but gently buckles Stevie in, then gets in and starts to drive off, waving at Sophie through the window.

“You okay?” Alex asks Sophie, as they watch Safiya pull out of the parking lot. Sophie nods.

“Yeah.” She says. “It’s just hard.” Just then she feels a hand land on her shoulder and she turns to see her dad standing there, smiling proudly at her.

“Some of the hardest choices we make, Sophie, are the best choices. I am so incredibly proud of you.”

Sophie knows he’s right, this is the hardest choice she’s ever had to made, but she also know it’s the best choice she’s ever made, and though it hurts like hell, she doesn’t regret it for a second.

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arigatouiris · 5 years ago

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head over heels // b.b — [09]

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader [Female pronouns]

Warnings: swearing; angst [a lot of it]; mentions of drugs and drug abuse and explicit sexual references; mentions of anxiety, depressive thoughts, suicide, post-traumatic stress; fluff [in later chapters]

Follows events after Endgame, but Tony, Natasha, Steve, Loki are alive in this universe.

Word count: 1300

Author’s Note: Short chapter, but heh. So much is revealed here huehuehue~

09. burn

✿

The two of them sat at Bucky’s small table, with eggs and sausages on their plates, however Bucky’s mind was elsewhere.

He quickly thought of the man that had attacked [Name] the other day, calling her a monster. He thought of how she told him she had secrets, of how she revealed way less than anyone he had ever met before.

He couldn’t even comprehend the words she was speaking because he was so immersed in his curiosity about her. Did she kill someone? Did she go in for some felony that would ultimately make him think differently of her?

But, how could that be possible? She was so open to him.

There he sat, across her, wondering about her, with no words in his mouth. He didn’t understand why he was so confused. He didn’t understand why this suddenly mattered. He didn’t understand why he couldn’t stay still or stay calm despite her having accepted him so openly and without judgment. Was it judgment at all that was preventing him from relaxing at that second? Or was it something else?

“You’re lost in thought.” She pointed out, looking straight at him.

Bucky froze. “Um,” He had no idea what to say, “It’s nothing… I’m just… I’m grateful.”

He didn’t know that she could tell apart lie from fact. However, she knew when not to probe. She concentrated on her meal and hoped Bucky would eat his too. But when the eggs turned cold, she knew something was wrong. All of a sudden, she felt less welcome and more foreign. She stared at Bucky, thought of how he had told her he loved her but did he?

What suddenly changed?

“Bucky, I…” If only she knew that Bucky was contemplating on something about her, she could have changed things. “I need to go.”

He didn’t even stop her. He couldn’t. It wasn’t as if he suddenly resented her, no. He loved her, he loved every bit of her. But, if she was a criminal and he a part of the Avengers now, it changed everything in his head. He was confused, afraid, lost—Bucky was torn. If he were a regular person, he would never have let something like this get in the way. However, he now had to think like an Avenger. He now had to put everything else in front of his own needs.

But, if he had merely asked her, she would have told him.

✿

12 Years Ago, New York

For as long as she could remember, she was a hate-filled person.

Rage fueled her veins and each waking day, rage was what kept her alive. With no parents, no family, she was raised as mere cattle, asked to do one chore after another. She didn’t even have a name, gestures would do the trick. The man who others thought was her father, Radley, was a monster—who spent his days drinking, and nights beating her for fun.

However, raising sheep was one of her favorite things to do. Radley’s wife was nice to her, but she passed away one stormy night due to the weather. Ever since then, even the slightest bit of sunlight had exited her life.

Radley had three children. Despite being raised in a household with a well-knit family, the boys hated one another. Jealous over each other’s possessions and existence. And well, the only thing they had in common was in how they treated her.

She watched with rage filled eyes as Radley’s eldest son, Michael, kicked her to the ground. The boys enjoyed beating her occasionally, the only bit of bonding that they shared.

“You stay down, you dumb bitch.”

“Hogger.”

“Fucking free-loading cunt.”

Words never affected her anymore. Especially not the ones Radley’s sons would throw at her. As a teenager, the only thing that she ever wanted was to see them dead so that she would be free to go where she wanted. She had no education, she had no paid job, she was what they called her—a free-loading hogger.

However, a daily task changed her life that morning.

She was asked to buy some more food for the sheep. She walked over to the store, a solid twenty minute walk, and it was while she was returning did she meet him for the first time. The first thing she thought of when she saw him was that he killed children for a living. He sat by the side of the road, a black trench coat covering him, a brown hat on his head, and a wicked grin.

What he told her that day, haunts her alive till date.

“You’ll have a wish granted because you seem so nice. Name it, and you’ll have it.”

Perhaps, it was the wrath of a teenager having been kicked to the ground so many times that bothered her most at that moment. She paused, gave the weird man a good look and stilled.

“Any wish?”

The man chuckled before taking his hat off. He had dark skin, and she saw scars adorned on his face. She was scared of him, but she didn’t let it show.

“Name it and it’s yours, [Name].”

She narrowed her eyes. “[Name]?”

“You look like a [Name].”

“But, that’s not my name.”

The man didn’t say a word. It was as if he knew she was nameless.

“What’s the wish then?”

She didn’t even think he was being serious. Therefore, as a joke, she said, “I wish the family that I lived with were burned alive.”

The man grinned at her, nodded once before walking away, the grin on his face still intact. She frowned once before continuing her way back, trying her hardest to forget about the words that came out of her mouth.

That night, her life changed.

She woke up with a start. She didn’t have a room for herself, she often slept with the sheep or on colder days she slept in the hall. Perhaps, it was good that the night was not too cold. Because the second she exited the shed, the house was on fire.

She gasped before running toward the house, pushing her way through, wondering and wondering over how this had happened. She entered the hall, fire surrounding her, and noticed how there were three bodies in there, Radley and two of his sons, lying there, breathless. She gasped before trying to look for Michael, the oldest, who was missing. She screamed his name, but the fumes were too much. Suffocated, she ran out of the burning house, crying and screaming, and she stopped.

She stood as she watched the house burning down. Her eyes were wide and her jaw dropped. She remembered speaking to the strange man, and what he had said.

Where’s Michael? Where’s that strange man? What’s happening?

She heard sirens from all over her, the police had finally come. The firefighters quickly followed, but she didn’t move from her spot. It was as if someone had pulled something out of her that stopped every sort of reaction that could have come out of her.

A second later, her hands were grabbed and put behind her back. And Michael’s voice was strong and clear.

“She’s the one who set the fire.”

The officer didn’t take time asking, “What’s your name, kid?”

And she didn’t take time in answering back, “[Name].”

✿

series taglist:

@miamua-posts @yourwonderbelle @kissingg-incars @tanya-diggory @s-0-ldat @iheartsebastianstan @taliarosej00 @coraz0ndcristal @vlogsquadbss @azriels-forgotten-shadow @gogoca @undiadeestos @justtrynagetthroughlife @sakurabl0ss0m @twshood @mercurybarnes @elsie2018 @tfandtws

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bottomaziraphale-ao3fanfic · 5 years ago

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ABO Ineffable Wives Hades and Persephone AU

Aziraphale and Crowley already married ruling Hades together already so happy and so so in love. A group of underworld lords and some of the gods above being unhappy with this union so they plan against them and when Crowley leaves to check on the souls of the rotted they pounce. Pretending to want to visit their baby sister they go to hades and wait till Aziraphale drinks the memory loss potion they poured in her wine before knocking her unconscious and stealing her to the upper world. She never at the fruit of the underworld because Crowley always wanted her to have a choice in leaving if she ever wanted too. Cerberus senses what's wrong and tries to save his precious queen but he is no match for two minor gods and a major one. So he runs to his master in warning but he doesn’t make it half way before collapsing. By this time Crowley has long since felt something wrong. The minute she felt Aziraphale knocked unconscious through their soul bond she sped through hades to get back to her home only to find her servants scared and his guards murdered and her wife's wedding ring and crown on the floor.

Twenty years pass and both seemed to have withered away into almost nothing. Crowley became a ghost if who she used to be and ruled with an even tighter fist than before. Shes colder, meaner with a tongue meant for a verbal lashing at anyone who gets on her bad side. Aziraphale was a ghost with no memory of who she was. She didn’t remember the pleasures of life that once brought smiles and laughter to her face. She hollowed out with a constant ache to her soul that always seemed to remind that something important was missing. Shed ask her brother Michael and Sandolph but they would just give her empty smiles and assure it's because of her nerves for her upcoming wedding with gabriel which in every sense of the word felt so wrong to her. As if every cell in her body shook in rage and disgust at the thought of marrying him, not when her heart and soul screamed that she belonged to someone else. That she already had the most perfect alpha the heavens could ever make for her. But she did not understand this. So she lived her days as a ghost her powers never came to her and she was always so weak and frail that she was on constant supervision.

One day Sandolph and Michael are both called to mount Olympus. They both gave her strict instructions not to go anywhere or invite anyone in and that they would be back as soon as they can to get everything ready for her marriage the upcoming week. It was so clear to her they didn’t love her and trust her the way they should like in the books she read and it was so obvious to her that Gabriel didn’t like her, let alone love her. He always acted like a villain from her books instead of the dashing hero meant to save and love her. She was so tired of this. Twenty years of misery and felt like death the moment she woke up in her bed to cruel eyes looking at her smiles that denied the questions she asked.

Before she used to be so afraid of the consequences if she disobeyed but now she could feel herself on the brink of death, any day now she would wither away to nothingness and end up in hades. It may have been to late for her to change her fate from death, but it wasn't too late for her to live as much as she can before she died. She’d prefer to die than live in this empty existence anyway, especially if she was going to marry the cruelty that was Gabriel the Mighty. She would take death over him any day. So she made the decision to run away and the fates have given her the perfect moment to get away.

With her favorite book, she ran as fast and far as she could and reached a dark forest that immediately gave her entryway and stumbled upon a meadow with night colored soil, bluminest water, and star filled flowers. It was the most beautiful thing she’s ever seen. So beautiful, so peaceful, so familiar. She felt safe here and happy that she gave the world a first genuine smile that hasn't been seen since she woke up.

Her smile slowly morphed to a frown as she gasped and dropped her book. Her head was swimming in pain and her vision swam. She stumbled to the closest tree and wondered if this was where she was gonna die. She took a ragged breath, and closed her eyes. Her heart was finally beating with life at the shelter she found in this dark forest, that she didn’t seem to mind the darkness clouding her vision. She was happy to find a place that brought such happiness to her, that she welcomed death with a smile for giving her this, this much before taking her away. So she closed her eyes and her body fell limp against the tree shading her from the sun.

Memories ran across her eyes like film and she dreamed of rose colored hair and wine stained lips that always stretched in a smile around her. She dreamed of their first meeting, their first kiss, the first time Crowley showed her the underworld and all the wondrous magic she held. She dreamed of meeting Anathema and Newt, she dreamed of giving Cerberus belly rubs, she dreamed of sneaking into the kitchens with Adam to eat sweet treats, she dreamed she dreamed she dreamed. Most importantly all about Crowley, her most important person, her other half, her heart and soul. Oh her poor crowley must be all alone and sad without her now, she must wake up right now to-

"Aziraphale! Aziraphale!" Her eyes slowly opened and she groaned. Her vision gave a blurry image of a man that slowly cleared away to reveal gabriel who held annoyance in his eyes and wore a displeased frown. Immediately her blood boiled at the sight of him.

"We've been looking all over for you! You were told not to leave! Made us all run around in worry when all you were doing was napping insufferable brat! Let's go you've caused enough trouble for one day."

There would've been tears at the words he struck against her except she wasn’t the person who blindly ran away to this safe haven withering away praying for death. She was who she always had been, Persephone- Goddess of Vegetation, Spring, and the Underworld. She was not one to be trifled with.

He went to grab her and she snarled "don’t you dare touch me!" He jumped and leaped back at the ferocity from her voice.

His eyes widen in confusion "what has gotten into you today??!! First you run off like a child and now you're talking back-

"Shut up" she regarded him coldly and stood up carefully still weak from her collapse.

She took a ragged breath "you've treated me like a cockroach to be crushed beneath your feet ever since I came to existence. Now you've stolen me from my home, my alpha. I've bitten my tongue too long for you lot since you were my family and I loved you all despite your treatment towards me. Not anymore. You hurt my alpha by hurting me and now you shall have to answer to her and I will not vouch for any of you a moment longer. I am going home.”

Gabriel stared at her in shock before laughing and her body shook in rage at the gesture.

"Oh sunshine you think we'll let you go back after all the effort it took to get you here? No ones going to let you leave and look at you! You're one breath away from withering into dust. You can’t do anything! You're weak and useless, you need us, you have no choice but to stay with us."

Vines quickly sprouted around gabriel and tightly wrapped around him to the point he couldn’t breathe. He choked from the one around his neck that made him face her in all her rage. For the first time ever in his immortal life, he felt afraid of Aziraphale, who tightened the vines around him and made him gasp in pain.

"You," she snarled "have no control over me. You never did and you never will. I never needed you nor will I ever. You forget what they named me. Persephone! The dread queen of the underworld." She took a step forward towards him, "Peresphone, to destroy," vines tightened and he gave a silent scream, “to murder."

She smiled coldly at him, "yes I am kind but I've been told I can be a bit of a bastard. Lucky for you I have no intentions of killing you. You are nothing to me and I couldn’t care less about your putrid existence. Let this be a warning to you Gabriel, you come after me or any of my family in the underworld and not only will you have to answer to me, you will have to answer to my Alpha who will rip you and everyone else limb from limb and cast you all down to tartarus.

"You. Would. Start. A war!" he gasped out.

"You started it the moment you took me." She replied coolly.

She snapped her fingers and a dog whistle appeared in her hand, she brought it to her lips and gave a long whistle. Seconds later the ground shook and out came the hound of Hades who growled with all heads snapping until they saw who summoned them. Immediately their tongues lolled forward and their tail wagged in excitement. They made to leapt at her until they saw the condition she was in and whimpered.

She gave them a large smile and rubbed all their heads. "Oh you good boys you've all grown! You've immediately came when mama called, such good babies! I promise you'll get a big treat when we see your other mom!" She cooed.

Cerberus kneeled down and let Aziraphale settle on him before standing on his legs. She glared at gabriel and let the vines release him, dropping him onto the floor while he gasped for breath. "Tell the others what happened and remember my words Gabriel. Come after any us, and we will destroy you."

Gabriel tried crawling towards her, but Cerberus growled and snapped his teeth in warning. She petted all his heads before whispering in his ear, "take me home" and they disappeared.

They sped through the underworld with the wind nipping at her skin, her eyes watered and the world blurred around her. She was so tired, especially from using her once forgotten powers, but she had to keep going just a little while longer. Cerberus sensing the state of her master, sped faster rushing through the guards guarding the palace, destroying the entrance and everything in his path until they reached the throne room.

“Cerebrus what the hell do you think you're doing!"

Aziraphales heart races at the sound of her alpha. She leaned her body away from cerberus and raised her head to her shell-shocked alpha who couldn't seem to believe she was here.

The throne room was deathly quiet and aziraphale felt such an ache tears sprung from her eyes. She gave a wobbly smile "Crowley" she croaked and a cough shook her frame and she gasped from the pain of it. No, no please she just got here! Just a little while longer please! She begged in her mind to Thanos who lurked in the corner of her eye.

Immediately Crowley was at her side taking her in her arms. Aziraphale sobbed at the comforting scent of her alpha. She forgot what she smelled like, oh how could she forget.

Chaos ran around them but all Aziraphale could register was Crowley. Her face, her scent, her touch. Heavens she missed her so much! She nearly choked on a sob and took a ragged breath. She could feel herself getting weaker and weaker.

Crowley who seemed to sense this patted her face with urgency to make her stay awake. "Angel please you have to stay awake just for a little while longer. Anathema is on her way. When she says it's okay, then you can sleep, but you have to wait for her word first, sweetheart please!" Crowley begged with desperation.

Oh her Alpha, her poor alpha looked so tired and aged she wished she could do something for her other than lay in her arms, dying. Tears kept streaming down her cheeks, she was so so happy she could see her Alpha one last time, she was so tired. She heard voices in the background as her vision spun to darkness but all she could hear was Crowley who begged her to stay awake, to stay by her side, to never leave her. With a deep pang of regret she realized for once she might not be able to listen to her love. She was really going to die. She prayed to anyone and everyone for Crowley to find happiness and love after her, as much as it hurt that she couldn’t be there by her side. Tears clogging her throat she mouthed I love you one last time before her hand in crowleys went limp and fell against her side.

Her body ached and she was in pain from what felt like the worst hangover shes ever had. She groaned when she opened her eyes and light filled in. Her vision blurred before clearing and it took her a second to remember what happened. She quickly sat up looking for her alpha who immediately fled to her side from the chair across her bed.

"Easy love, you're alive, you’re safe, you're here in my arms. Nothing will ever take you away from me again I promise you this."

She sobbed against Crowley's chest who rocked her in her lap on the bed she slept on and patiently waited while stroking her hair.

Her alpha whispered quiet reassurances until a few moments passed and Aziraphale stopped crying. She sniffed one last time before raising her eyes to her alpha who looked as wrecked as Aziraphale felt.

"Darling, what happened?"

Crowley took a deep breath and threaded a hand through Aziraphales hair, quietly stroking through it. She waited patiently as Crowley quietly got her bearings together.

"Love, you've been poisoned. The potion they've been giving you for the past twenty years was made of the darkest black magic to suppress our souls bond so we couldn’t feel or sense each other at all. The effects of it were poisoning you slowly," Crowley took a ragged breath "angel you nearly died" she shook as tears fell down her cheeks and she grit her teeth.

"I thought you died," she choked out, "these past twenty years I thought you died because I couldn’t sense you. But then I searched every inch of this place and I couldn’t find or sense you at all! I nearly went mad with trying. All this time you were alive and you could've died any moment and I wouldn't have known!" crowley shook and Aziraphale immediately pressed Crowley’s head against her scent gland who immediately inhaled her scent to assure herself Aziraphale was still with her, alive and still breathing.

"Darling," Aziraphale whispered with love, "Do not for a second blame yourself for any of what has happened. I know in my heart that you've raised heaven and hell to find me. I do not blame you, so don’t you dare blame the love of my life for crimes other people have committed against us. It is not your fault. Do you understand me my alpha?"

Crowley sniffed against her scent gland before raising her head and pressing it against Aziraphales. "Yes, my love. My omega."

Aziraphale knew it would take far longer for Crowley to believe her words, but that's alright. She was here now by Crowleys side, and she would remind her everyday until her alpha believed her.

They stared at each other letting moments pass just basking in each others presence and enjoying every touch and caress they offered each other.

"Love, I know you've just woken up, you must still be exhausted and in pain, and I will wait until you are ready to tell me, but I must know what happened to you the moment you were gone."

Aziraphale hesitated for a moment wondering if there was a right time to tell her before deciding there would never be a right time. So she told her about Gabriel, Sandolph, Michael, Hastur and Ligur, inviting themselves for dinner spiking her wine with what she assumes was the memory loss potion. How they knocked her unconscious and when she woke up they told her she was in an accident. How they kept her on a tight leash and belittled her for breathing every second of the day till she reached the point of praying for death. They wouldn't let her do anything but read, they almost never let her step foot outside. They never let her eat or drink anything but a glass of wine that she now realizes must of been the soul poison. She tells Crowley everything from how Gabriel told her she was finally ready to be his obedient little wife to the confrontation with him at the forest where Crowley and she first met and then running away with Cerberus with her memories regained and intact.

She didn’t realise she was crying until Crowley gently pressed her head against her scent gland urging Aziraphale to inhale her scent to which she gratefully did and immediately calmed down.

They stayed there pressed against each other, holding each other in comfort until Aziraphale felt Crowley shake.

"They took you. They hurt you. They made you pray for death. I will destroy them and tear them limb from limb and let cerberus chew on their bones. Never again angel, I promise nothing will ever hurt you or take you away from me again." Crowley swore and there wasn’t an ounce of doubt that Aziraphale held for her. She believed every word.

#so uh my peeps from discord chat told me i should post this #so uh here you go *yeets this and runs away*#alpha beta omega #ineffable wives #ineffable husbands #my writing #hades and persephone au

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wildflowerhigh · 5 years ago

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Second Time Around (c.h.) | Part 8

Summary: Maybe, just maybe, Calum Hood isn’t so cynical about love anymore.

Word Count: 2.8K

A/N: This is the end! What a rollercoaster to get here, but we’ve finally arrived. I’m genuinely sad this series is over, but like I said before, this is not the end! I’m hoping to post a couple of bonus one shots. Anyway, thank you so much for sticking with me and reading this till the end. I hope you guys loved this series as much as I loved writing it. Also, y’all are more than welcome to come and shout in my inbox about Harper and Calum! I’m more than willing to keep writing about these two, but you gotta tell me what you wanna read. So… send me blurbs or something, I don’t know hehe. Okay, I’m just gonna shut up now and let y’all read, bye!

---

“HIGH SCHOOL REUNION - CLASS OF 2014,” Harper read off the massive banner hanging inside the school gym. Luke, Michael, Harper and him were at their high school reunion, surrounded by their ex-classmates sipping wine from stem glasses. Ashton obviously hadn’t come, choosing to have a date night with Kaykay instead. Sierra and Crystal had decided not to come either.

“Technically we’re not class of 2014, we dropped out before we graduated,” Luke commented as they surveyed the gym. As Calum scanned the room, different names popped into his head as he recognized each person. Some of them he had actually been friends with, but most he had barely known.

“Yeah, but you’re famous, that’s probably why you got called,” Harper said, smirking, before walking off to talk to someone else she had spotted. The group split, and Calum found himself talking to Jenny Campbell. She had been a cheerleader, and in a quite cliché manner, had looked down her nose at him and his friends. But here she was now, talking to him like they had been the best of friends in high school. If Ashton had been in his place, he probably would have made a snarky comment to her face and walked away, but Calum was unfortunately nicer than him.

“Hey Cal, come with me, I wanna show you something,” Harper slid up next to him, grabbing his arm to pull him away. She interrupted Jenny’s rant about some topic (that was verging on racist territory) and made Calum want to claw his eyeballs out, so he was glad that his girlfriend had stepped in. Jenny cleared her throat, to get Harper’s attention.

“Jenny. Hello,” Harper said, and Calum could hear the mock pleasantry in her voice. “How are you?”

“Calum and I were having a conversation, Harper, before you so rudely interrupted,” Jenny replied scornfully.

“Oh yeah? What you were talking about?” Harper asked, turning around to face her. Calum remembered now that Jenny and her had never actually gotten along; Jenny was fake nice, which Harper hated.

“Something you wouldn’t really understand, Harper.” Jenny smiled at Harper condescendingly, and it was clear that Jenny thought her and Calum were somehow better than Harper. Calum cringed at the thought.

“Right, of course. And how’s the divorce coming along?” Harper asked cheerfully, but Calum noticed the scathing tone in her voice. Jenny’s jaw dropped, and from the expression on her face, he could tell Harper had hit a nerve. “Heard it lasted only ten days, and he cheated on you with your bridesmaid? That’s just so, so, sad.” She looked at her with mock pity. “Okay, Jenny, it was great talking to you, bye!”

She turned Calum around and pushed him away, shooting her a condescending smile. He struggled to stifle his laughs- he managed to say goodbye to Jenny, and she looked like a volcano ready to burst when he last saw her. Harper and Calum made it out of the gym, laughing so hard that his stomach hurt.

“That was cold, baby,” he said between laughs, the nickname seamlessly slipping out of his lips. Harper’s grin somehow got even wider.

“I’m up to here with her bullshit,” she said when they had stopped laughing, gesturing next to her head with her hand. “I never stood up to her in high school, but I couldn’t give less of a shit now.”

“And that’s how it should be,” he said encouragingly, giving her a high five. She smiled at him, her cheeks slightly red. “How did you even know all of that?”

“Amy told me all of it, just now,” she replied. Amy had been Harper’s other best friend. She was quite a nice girl, as far as he remembered.

“Oh yeah, how is she?”

“She’s doing great, she’s an entrepreneur now,” Harper said, nodding.

“Wow.” Harper and Calum just stood there looking at each other, smiles stretched across their faces. “Why did you pull me away anyway?”

“Oh!” Harper smacked her forehead. “I wanted to go see our old classrooms.” She grabbed his hand, and pulled him up the stairs.

“My Year 12 classroom,” Harper murmured, peeking into the first room to the right. Calum peeked in too- that was where he would have studied if he hadn’t dropped out. It looked identical to his older classrooms, to be perfectly honest.

“Year 11,” she mumbled to herself, moving on to another classroom. By now she had a lazy smile on her face, probably saturated with memories and nostalgia. Calum joined her in looking at Year 11. He was there for most of it- it had been good in terms of the friends, but he just couldn’t hack the studies part of it.

“What did they say when I dropped out?” Calum asked, and Harper shrugged.

“Don’t remember, actually. I don’t think people were actually that surprised.”

Calum squinted at her. “I wasn’t that bad at studies, was I?”

“No, but everyone knew the band was your main goal towards the end. It simply became a matter of time,” she replied, and rubbed his arm soothingly. “Don’t worry, love.”

They moved on to the Year 10 classroom, reminiscing about that year, and then finally to the Year 9 classroom. The year Harper had joined.

Harper stepped in and looked around the room, a wistful smile stretched across her face. The room hadn’t changed one bit in so long. “I’m so glad my dad got transferred here,” she murmured, and Calum smiled at the back of her head. He was glad too.

After their evening at the cliff, he had taken her out on a couple dates, which had only cemented his decision to make this relationship work. She was absolutely incredible. He had asked her to be his girlfriend, and to his delight, she had instantly said yes.

Calum walked over to his old table, two rows from the back of the classroom. He sat down on the bench (he was too big, he just barely fit on it), facing the blackboard. Harper looked over at him, amused. “I was sat here, just like this, when you walked in that day. On your first day of school.” He tapped the table slightly. “You introduced yourself, and I’ve been whipped for you ever since.”

"Just like that?" She teased, half giggling, and did a mock catwalk into the room, twirling around like a Miss World contestant.

"Exactly like that, yeah," he managed to get out in the midst of fond giggles at his girlfriend's fooling around.

She smiled at him and crossed him to sit at her own old table, diagonally to the right behind his. He swiveled around in his tiny seat to face her. "You would lean over and correct my maths work," he remembered.

She shrugged. "It was the only way to talk to you," she said, making Calum's eyes go wide. “Yeah! I used to keep looking at your work to see if you made mistakes- and you made a lot of them- and I would correct you.” She chuckled slightly, shaking her head. “I stupidly thought that was the way to weasel myself into your heart.”

“But it worked, though,” he said, and she smiled at him. "I wish I had asked you out then."

"I'm actually glad you didn't. We would have turned out as different people if we had been together then, and…" she walked over to sit on his table, and he looked up at her. His hand automatically moved to her calf, lightly stroking it. "I like the people we are right now."

He stood up in front of her, pulling her legs around his waist. She smirked at him, and his heart flipped like it always, always did. "I like the people we are right now too,” he said, and pressed his lips to hers. The kiss almost immediately got more intense, her hands ruffling through his short hair as he tilted his head.

"Mr Hood, Miss Romano, maybe don't make out in this classroom," a familiar voice piped up near them, and Harper and Calum instantly pulled away to look at the source. Mr Wayne, their English teacher was standing in the doorway, frowning amusedly at the couple. "There are children who study on that very table."

"Mr Wayne, hello!" Harper said, jumping off the bench, brushing her hair. Calum brushed a hand over his face and hair as well. "We were just reminiscing!"

"By kissing? That’s an interesting method," he commented.

“Sorry, Mr Wayne,” Calum said, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly. Mr Wayne shook his head, a smile appearing on his face. He had been a pretty chill English teacher, Calum remembered.

"I really don't know if you kept him and the others in less trouble, or if they got you into more trouble, Miss Romano," he said, walking closer to them, his hands behind his back.

"Let's just say it was a mix of both, Mr Smith," Harper said, making Mr Lee chuckle.

"And you two are reconnecting in an unconventional manner," he quipped, and both Harper and Calum blushed, his hand moving to the small of her back.

"Yeah, it... just happened."

"Well, please don't make out again in the classrooms. It was nice seeing you two again." He turned around to leave, and then looked back at them. "And I must say, it’s about time." He smiled at them and walked out, leaving the two of them confused.

“What the hell was that supposed to mean?" Harper whispered.

"I have no idea."

---

An hour and a half later, after a decent dinner hosted by the school itself, the four of them drove back home together. They had gone in Calum’s car, so he was driving. Harper had placed her hand on his that was on the gear stick five minutes into the ride, leading to a constant barrage of teasing from Luke and Michael, but Calum didn’t care- all he felt was contentment.

They dropped off Luke and Michael at their respective homes, and as the car sped away, Harper sighed loudly. “I don’t wanna go home,” she whined.

“You don’t have to go home right now if you don’t want to, you know, you’re an adult,” he remarked, and her eyes grew wide.

“I’m an adult. Oh my god, I can do whatever I want!”

Calum chuckled at her. “Yeah, being back home makes you feel like a kid again, doesn’t it?”

“It really does, I feel like I should be at home doing homework right now,” she replied, giggling.

“So, Ms. Harper Romano, the adult,” he joked. “Where do you wanna go?” He pulled over on the side of the road- he didn’t wanna overshoot their destination that she was yet to pick.

Harper looked around; suddenly, her hand gripped Calum’s tighter. “Benny’s Diner. It’s right there.” She pointed at a tiny restaurant on the side of the road with her free hand.

“Seriously?”

“Yeah! I remember all the couples used to come here for dates back then,” she said. Calum shrugged, stopped the car and got out, his hand disconnecting with hers for a few seconds till she was by his side again. This time, she slid her hand fully into his, and Calum couldn’t help the smile that formed on his face.

The name of the diner sounded kinda familiar to him, and as they walked in, he realized where he had heard it before. “I’m pretty sure Luke used to come here with his high school girlfriend,” he remarked, and Harper nodded.

“Probably. Literally everyone popular ate here. I’m pretty sure they came here after the school formal too,” she replied, settling into one of the booths. Calum sat down next to her, and he reluctantly let go of her hand. “I didn’t go with them, though. I went home after the dance. There’s only so much socializing I can do.”

Calum smiled at her, and looked around. It was a cute place, but he didn’t think he had ever come there before. He definitely hadn’t come here on a date, he would have remembered. “Who did you go to the formal with?” he asked.

“Tommy Huang,” she said, looking up from the menu she had picked up off another table. Calum’s mouth fell open at her answer.

“Seriously?” he asked, for the second time that night. “That guy was such a douche!”

“Yeah, but he was the only guy who asked me, and everyone else had dates.” She shrugged nonchalantly. “I didn’t wanna be that chick that’s all alone at the formal.”

The waitress interrupted them just then- Harper ordered a chocolate milkshake while Calum ordered a tea.

“If I had been there, I would have asked you to the formal,” Calum said, after the waitress had left, and she smiled warmly at him.

“And I would have said yes, but you were in London,” she replied. She didn’t sound at all bitter, but the guilt ripped through his heart anyway.

“I’m sorry we abandoned you,” he said, reaching out to grab her hand, and she gladly took it. “And left you to get through the mess that is high school all alone,” he finished, and she shook her head.

“You didn’t abandon me, Cal, you guys were following your dreams! I would be a horrible friend if I felt bad about this.”

“So you don’t feel bad at all?”

“Well, I-” She paused, looking for words. “I was a little lonely, of course, I don’t blame you guys for it,” she said pointedly. “In fact, I’m glad you guys went to London, I mean, look where you are now!”

The universe has a funny way of proving points, and as if on cue, the diner’s speakers started playing She Looks So Perfect. Both of their jaws dropped- while Harper’s expression was more of amusement, Calum’s expression was sheer horror.

“And your song wouldn’t be played at random diners if you hadn’t gone to London!” She clapped her hands in glee, getting up from the booth. Calum put his face in his hands, hiding the smile that popped up from looking at his girlfriend’s joy.

“You’re kidding, right?” he asked, watching her dance and sing along to Luke’s verse of the song.

“I am not kidding, Calum Thomas Hood, now up you get!” She dramatically raised her hands, gesturing to him to stand. He got up, smirking at her shining face. “The whole world loves you, baby,” she cooed, taking his hands into hers, and he laughed. She forced him to dance, moving his hands like that of a doll, and he sheepishly went along with it, unable to stop laughing. He noticed the waitress staring at them like they were crazy, but at this point, he kinda felt like they were.

During the chorus, he even twirled her around; Harper cackled, which made Calum cackle as well. He felt carefree- like the world was only him and her in this diner, dancing to a song that he had made, acting silly.

When his verse came, he serenaded her, getting down on his knees as he sang the line, ‘If I showed up with a plane ticket, and a shiny diamond ring with your name on it, would you run away too? ‘Cause all I really want is you!’

Harper laughed as he sang, cracking up so hard she couldn’t talk. Calum was laughing just as hard- he could feel his stomach clench from laughing so much. After they finally caught their breath, Harper stood up fully, pulling him closer by his shirt. They were still giggling, and Calum doubted they would stop soon. “What are the odds of them playing this song right-fucking-now?” she asked, amused. He shook his head, his hands gripping her waist.

“Very, very slim,” he replied, and bent down to kiss her cheek. She grinned at him, and Calum felt like he was on cloud nine. The song had reached its end by now, and some other hit pop song started playing.

“I would, by the way,” she added, after a few moments, and Calum shot her a confused look. “If you showed up with a plane ticket and a shiny diamond ring with my name on it, I would run away with you.”

Calum didn’t think his heart could melt for her even more than it already was, but it did. Looking at her cheesy grin- the smile that bowled him over in the first place, that would forever be etched in his memory- he fell head over heels for her once again, as he had countless times before. In this time that he had reconnected with her, which was almost a year, he had found something worth fighting for.

Looking into her eyes, Calum felt a tinge of apprehension, of fear that he would lose her and go through the awful feeling that was heartbreak all over again. But much stronger than that apprehension, crushing it into pieces, rose hope- hope for a future of love, with her. A feeling he hadn’t experienced in so long, it seemed almost foreign.

“Consider it done,” he murmured, and her smile widened. And when she stepped closer to him, her hand brushing his cheek, and pressed her sweet lips to his, Calum knew there was nowhere else he wanted to be.

---

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anuknowha · 6 years ago

Text

Till Death Do We Part// Chapter 4, Too Much Fun

I would highly appreciate it if you reblog it and all its lovely tags. Thank you!

In a bedroom:

Music rang through the bedroom, everyone dancing and clapping their hands in enjoyment. The door cracked slightly.

A light skinned man who held a microphone in one hand. The tune of pop music playing in the background as he started to tap his foot to the beat. He danced across the floor, smooth as ever as his "audience" observed him in awe.

He put the microphone to his mouth and took an inhale as the words slowly appeared on the screen. He started to sing.

"I don't care what you're talking bout baby. I don't care what you say. Don't you come walkin' beggin' back mama. I don't care anyway. Dime after dime, I gave you all of my money. No excuses to make." He was in complete sync with the beat as his curly black hair bounced with his every movement.

The youngest girl was shaking her hips to the song. The skinny dark skinned guy next to her soon grabbed her by her hand and started to dance with her.

Another male, with pale skin couldn't help but gyrate his hips as he tapped his feet to the beat.

Two of the more bulky young men remained on the edge of the bed clapping their hands. The heftier guy was on the floor, admiring the man before him. And the other two women couldn't help but laugh and cheer him on.

Within a few minutes the song faded out and the room was filled with applause.

"That was great Michael!" One of the men on the floor chuckled.

"Thank you Duke." Michael bowed.

"What exactly happened to you Michael? When I was alive you were well and thriving." The young girl said, Michael couldn't help but toss her a small smile.

"Cardiac arrest, well overdose I should say. I guess its because my physician gave me too many pills and I just couldn't take it and it ended me."

"Man they didn't have to do you like that. Always gotta get rid of the black man because of the empowerment, right?" The guy in the bandanna huffed.

"I don't believe it was on purpose..." The girl stated.

"No, it probably was." Michael said nodding his head. "Tupac is right. Even though I had changed the color of my skin and altered my face it never changed the fact of the matter that I was still a black man."

"I still can't believe you did that Michael." The heavy set guy on the floor expressed.

"I've had some conflicting battles with my self-confidence, a good example of that was me hating the shape of my nose. Janet did too, and we both ended up getting surgery for it."

"Well a person like me got murdered and I still think Biggie over here did it." Tupac announced.

Biggie got up and walked over to Tupac with a face of disgust. "You weren't alive when it happened but they killed me too Tupac. Someone killed me too, and although I had a beef with you I would never hurt you like that my brother." He sighed.

"Someone shot you too?!" The girl that Tupac was just dancing with nodded her head.

"They did from what I've read and ain't nobody find out who had killed either of y'all."

"And what happened to you princess? You get shot too?" He clicked his tongue.

One of the women on the other side of the room got up and looked over at him, she went over to the girl and wrapped her arm around her shoulder in comfort.

"Aaliyah died when the plane she was on crashed in the Bahamas. It was a very tragic death."

"I-I died from a heart attack too Michael." A voice came from the guy in the back of the room, everyone shot him a look.

"We know." they all said in unison, well almost all except the two who were on the bed.

"Now, Michael, I still don't understand why you'd want to make such a drastic change to your appearance like that but what matters is that you're satisfied son." Duke said with a smile.

"I am Duke, I am." Michael laughed. “Well more than I was before if that’s what you meant.”

Biggie and Tupac only shook their heads at Michael’s response. And although they didn’t agree with his decisions, they knew in the back of their mind that they were in support of his decision in the matter. Everyone had the right to be happy in their own way, and they all knew what made Michael feel more confident in himself.

Back downstairs; as the two Beatles entered the living room everyone gave them a wide eyed look.

"Aren't you John and George...? From the Beatles?" David eyed them, taking in their forms.

"Yeah we are... What about it?" John snorted.

"I always wanted to meet the Beatles. You know, before there were three." Kurt trailed off until he took a better look at them, he squinted. "Wait-"

"George died in 2001." David added, being the only one in the room with possible knowledge of this information.

John raised a brow and pointed to the dirty blonde sitting on the stairs. "And aren't you Brian Jones? The original lead singer of the Rolling Stones?"

Brian let out a sigh and nodded his head. Jim wrapped an arm around his shoulder and let out a laugh.

"He's still upset about being here." He teases.

Brian quickly threw Jim’s arm off with a blush. “I’m the only one in the room who was murdered, so yeah, I’m angry, I’m pissed, and I’m hurt.”

Freddie was quickly taken aback. “But, I thought it was a cause of misadventure?”

“You know damn well Freddie that a 27 year old man that owns a pool can obviously swim. He “drowned” in his own pool. It would be kind of ridiculous right? Don’t you think?” David ridiculed.

George tried to hold back a laugh, “Well at least your killer didn’t sit at the crime scene-.”

“Fuck off George. I swear. They never jailed him, because there wasn’t any fucking evidence.” Brian snarled as he stood up on the stairs, he started to gesture towards the slightly “older” man.

Jim quickly grabbed him by the arm and pulled him down, smoke leaking through his teeth as he rolled his eyes at the boy. Brian didn’t hesitate to try to free his arm from Jim who only tightened his grip.

David chortled, unable to keep his eyes off them.

By this point the two Beatles were fed up and decided to walk past them. And as they went up the stairs, Brian lunging at them like a wild dog, growling and baring his teeth, but Jim held him back not lightening his grip on his arm in the slightest.

George and John paused looking at the room filled with rock stars but soon continued their journey. You could tell John was focused, he was quick to try to move from this room. It seemed to make him somewhat uncomfortable; or maybe the feeling was indifference.

Back in the bedroom; Tupac and Biggie were finally talking out the conspiracy many people were speculating.

"I think we can agree brother, that neither one of us are responsible for each other's death." Tupac smiled as he held his hand out.

"I agree." Biggie grabbed his hand and gave him a firm handshake.

"I'm glad everyone is gettin' along. You know back in my day, when Louis and I were swinging towns and jazzing up houses, there was too much going on, seemed that no one wanted to get along." Duke thought for a second, tapping his chin.

"All of you guys still had houses a swingin after we were long gone, huh?" Louis cackled.

"Yeah, and some of us are still on earth swinging, dancing, and satisfying the young and the old." The woman with her arm around Aaliyah spoke.

"I know I did Ms.Houston." Aaliyah nodded grabbing her hand.

"I think we've had enough talk about our troubles don't you think? Whose turn is it on the karaoke machine?" the other woman hummed looking around the room. "How about you Elvis?"

Most of the time, Elvis was cocky, but this time he was slightly reluctant about taking the microphone.

“What’s wrong? Michael questioned, slightly worried.

“You know karaoke wasn’t around much when I was.” Elvis sighed.

Michael walked over to him and handed him the mic. He gripped his hand firmly and gave him a reassuring nod. He whispered something as Elvis took the mic and walked to the front of the room. Whitney walked over and helped change the song for him.

“What song would you like?” she hummed as she scrolled through on Youtube searching for songs she possibly could have known.

“Jailhouse rock.”

The music started, and Elvis took a big breath in. He kept his eyes away from the screen and towards the others as he started snap his fingers to the beat. Everyone soon followed.

Outside the room; George and John were walking past until George caught rift of the music, he stopped. He moved closer to the door, and started watching through the crack of the door. He seemed almost in awe at the sight. John tugged on his arm.

"Let's go. I want to find that room." He stated stubbornly as he continued to walk, George's wrist in his grip.

George looked back in disappointment.

"But I actually was interested."

"Later George, first we read. I want to know how everyone died."

George let out a sigh until they passed a room in which they heard the strum of a guitar. They both stopped in their tracks and looked at each other. This door was closed, locked. Comically they both put their ears up to the door and John gave George a "shh" placing his finger over his hand to signal silence. They listened, the cords sounding slightly familiar to George’s ears, and his hand reaches towards the knob before its quickly knocked away by his band mate. Wave after wave of notes were heard by them. They wondered who was behind the door but dare not try to open it.

Nodding at each other they agreed to move on, until they got to a door that was wide open. They saw a boy sitting there, someone neither of them recognized. He seemed different from everyone else in the house.

He was drawing or something, but they dared not bother him, he seemed too into whatever it was that made the young boy a busy bee. They were both curious as to who he was but John figured they’d find out more by reading than by asking him questions. Especially since he seemed like he wanted to be alone.

After a few more down they see a tall man standing next to a giant red door. This man was built, not wearing anything but a silk red robe. His face was firm with a lack of emotion. He had curly black hair, and brown eyes that shifted over in their direction. In his hand was a scepter, it was golden and about half his height.

“You have come to read prophecies?” The man questioned, his tone and posture staying still as a statue. “You must state your names.” he announced.

“John Lennon.”

“And George Harrison.”

The man put his hand on the door, the scepter glowing. The door soon opened and John and George took a step in.

In the basement; Janis let out a small gasp, “I should’ve told them that they can’t see their own or any of their band mates.”

I appreciate feedback!

Taglist: @lennonwhipped @rogers-flowered-blazer @caviarandqueen @sweet-mother-love @peacelennon

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abunchofbadchoices · 6 years ago

Text

Michael's Song

HSS Michael x MC (Jordan) in Midnight Sun AU

*Disclaimer: Most of the lines and scenes I got from the movie the Midnight Sun and all the rights belongs to the creators and writers, as well as the characters from PB. This is merely a converted fan fiction*

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four

Part Five

"That is so romantic it disgusts me." Maria mumbled from Jordan's bed, facing the ceiling with the book covering her face. She sits up suddenly, having been reminded of something. "What did he say about your XP?"

Jordan looks hopeless. The blonde had been sitting on the swivel chair this time, staring at the distance as she bites her lip to stop from smiling too much. The girl managed to respond after a few seconds, frowning. "It didn't came up."

Maria scowled. "What do you mean it didn't come up?"

"I-I didn't bring it up." Jordan shrugged. "I'm not gonna just randomly be like, 'Hey, dude, by the way, the sunlight's gonna..." She makes exploding gestures with her hands. "Like, look when you tell someone you're sick, then you start to become more like... a disease and less like a person. It's--"

She gazed at her pointedly.

"I'm gonna tell him, I promise, but I don't know when I'm gonna see him again."

"I do." Maria sighs in dismay, though she tried to hide it. "You know that annoying guy who works at the ice cream shop?"

"The nerdy one you're annoyed with? Well, scratch that, you're annoyed at everyone." Jordan rolls her eyes playfully, then points to herself. "Except for Jordan."

Her face feels like burning at the statement her best friend dropped. Does Jordan knows? Maria brushed it off and threw a pillow at Jordan. "Whatever, J. But yes, Aiden, his name. His parents-- a strict bunch, mind you-- are out of town tonight and he's throwing a party and he told me to bring friends. So, I'm gonna bring you--"

"No, no, no, no..."

"And you're gonna bring Michael."

"No!" Jordan stands, holding her hands up while shaking her head profusely. "He's gotta, like, you know... Doesn't... I have to wait till he texts me first, right?"

"Yeah, totally!" Maria smiles. Oh, Jordan, why are you so innocent... Usually, Maria wouldn't suggest such a forward move and what does she even know about dealing with a guy when she hadn't even get past her previous first dates but well, if it means putting this innocent bundle of dorkiness out of misery then hell yes, Maria will do something. She sits straighter, crossing her legs in a no-nonsense way and look at the girl with the most serious expression. "And then, you know, his squire will send a note via carrier pigeon asking if you'd like to merge your kingdoms. What is this, 18th century England? Listen, Jordan, you're a gorgeous, young, uh...badass woman. You're gonna text him whenever you damn well please."

The blonde stares at her. There is a blankness on her face.Maria dives through the pillows and locates a phone, then hands it to Jordan. "Be confident, okay? Give him the facts..."

"Okay." Jordan takes a deep breath and opens her message app. She follows Maria's instructions to be confident and... among other things.

Down at the town's shipyard, Michael hears the ping of his phone while he was in the midst of scrubbing the stains from the side of his uncle's boat. He wipes his hands on his shirt, which was already drench in sweat after working for hours on that boat under the blaring sky. There is a message from Jordan. Michael couldn't help the smirk on his lips.

Hey. My friend is having a party tonight if you want to come.

"Play a little hard to get." Maria whispers.

Jordan starts another message. "All right."

Michael receives another message before he can even type a reply.

I don't care if you come or not.

He raised his eyebrows.

Maria scoots closer to her. "Make sure that he knows he's not the only reason you're going."

"Okay. Alright."

Back at the shipyard, Michael receives the third message that made him laugh louder than he intended to.

I have lots of friends.

- Jordan

The messages stops coming so he takes that as a cue to answer back.

Maria took the phone from her best friend to see the messages she sent and instantly freezes as soon as she reads them. "Oh, no. What's this??"

Hey. My friend is having a party tonight if you want to come.

I don't care if you come or not.

I have lots of friends.

- Jordan

Maria doesn't know where to face palm or something, but before she dies of second-hand embarrassment, a new message came to Jordan's screen.

I'm in.

▪️▪️▪️

"This is gonna be a tame, safe, parent-friendly party." Maria called after Scott. Jordan has been trailing behind the two as they walk from the kitchen to the living room.

"Ha!" Her Dad turns as they reach the door. "It's a totally lame party. You know what we should do? We should stay here. We'll get Hunan Chinese. You guys love Hunan, right?"

She and Maria groaned.

"Put some Netflix on. It will be perfect!"

The three of them went on full circle around the house until finally, they ended up in the kitchen once more. Scott open the fridge to check for snacks. But Jordan reached out and pushes it close. She musters a determined look on her face. "Dad, you know I'm a good kid. You know I'm not gonna do anything crazy, but I swear, if I spend one more night here-- just listening to everyone else outside my window, living their lives-- I might... go... crazy!"

Scott knits his eyebrows, then look at Maria for back up but the raven-haired young woman simply shrugs.

Jordan continues. "Tomorrow night, we can order way too much chow mein, and have a movie marathon."

Her father's eyes move from her to Maria then back. Probably calculating the consequences before he lets out a heavy breath. "All right."

"Yes!" Jordan hugs her father tightly. "You're the best Dad in the world."

Maria gestured for her to follow and they rush upstairs to her room and the girl starts rippling through her clothes.

"Okay, um, Michael's gonna meet us at Aiden's around 8:00." Jordan reminded her.

"Then we have to get ready."

"Girl, what are you talking about? We have like three hours."

Maria suddenly turns and glare at her. She almost forgot her best friend has been Student Council President at Oliver Berry High for two years. She was all about organizing stuffs, especially parties. And Jordan knows better than to counter her when in the midst of looking for an appropriate attire for her. "Danielle Jordan Lee, we're already behind."

She watched helplessly, but after about ten minutes, Maria raised a light-blue lacy dress from her closet that she doesn't even know exists. Their eyes meets, then their faces lights up in agreement. Two hours and fifty minutes later, they are both dressed up and perfectly groomed for the night. Her father's expression as soon as she steps out of her room was priceless, but also a bit of longing in his eyes as Jordan was aware how much she resembles her late mother.

They said their goodbyes quickly and outside the door, Maria stops her and looks at her up and down. "You look beautiful. Good."

"Aren't you looking good yourself." Jordan smiles back, taking her best friend's hand then ran to the car already parked at the curb.

It was a short drive to the Zhou Family house and at exactly 8:00, the two girls are making their way up the decorated porch of the two storey house. For a party, Jordan finds it weird that the house seems quiet. Parties were never quiet, according to the teen flick movies she watched, but maybe this one haven't really started.

The door open just as they reached it, an Asian guy grinning at the sight of them both. "You came." His face falters soon after, looking at Maria nervously. "Is there any chance that you, or your hot friend, hey, know how to get beer... out of a keg?"

"Oh, no." Maria's smile dissolves. She shoves past the guy and looks even more furious to see the house is empty. "You didn't get a tap??"

Aiden scratch the back of his neck, following them inside. "I-- I didn't realize they were separate things-- why would they sell me a barrel of beer I can't even access?"

This party is a complete disaster, Maria fumed. She went to the kitchen and glances back to see Jordan touching the colorful decorations in awe. Aww, this sweet sweet girl... But still, Maria couldn't believe she entrusted Aiden to plan a party by himself. And worst, she actually showed up and dared to expect something good.

At the kitchen, they find two other people she recognized were from Music club at Berry High. Myra and Luis are busy tinkering the keg to open...to no avail. They glance up and waved awkwardly.

"AIDEN!" Maria called sharply. "What the hell? This is a tame, safe, parent-friendly party!"

Aiden backed away slowly. "Do tame parties have sundae bars?"

"I think it's cool." Jordan joins in, beaming excitedly.

"No, don't listen to her." Her best friend hissed at Aiden. "Okay, she's never been to a party before. She doesn't understand how dire the situation is. We gotta go, Jordan." Maria grab her hand and turns to go.

"No, no, no! I just made a huge thing of chili." Aiden reasoned.

"Aiden, chili is not a party food."

Their conversation was cut off by the sound of car engine shutting off and its door opening and closing.

"You see?" The Asian points outside. "The party's just kicking off."

They all rushed down the stairs to see who actually decided to show up. A blue pick-up truck was parked outside and a guy in a green bomber jacket is walking towards the house.

"What's Michael Harrison doing here?" Aiden wonders in disbelief.

"My God..." Maria rubs her face in frustration just as she felt someone came up behind her.

Michael stops for a second as soon as he caught sight of Jordan, a genuine smile lighting on his face and even blink a few times, as if he couldn't believe what he is looking at.

"Hi." Jordan greets, a bashful smile on her lips.

▪️▪️▪️

Another hour passed and the trio still hadn't managed to open the keg.

Michael and Jordan sits on porch chairs, just making small talks while Maria stays not far from them like a guarding hawk.

His eyes studies every detail of the beautiful face just inches away from him. "You look really amazing."

"Um... it's all Maria." Jordan said quietly, looking down on her lap and it makes him think that maybe, him acting weird makes her shy.

Michael isn't much into praising people, or voicing out opinions in general. Usually, he goes to a party, hang out with people regardless if they look good as long as they don't bother him too much. But he couldn't help it if she happens to look so amazing this night. Or every night for that matter. Whether Jordan is dressed in sweat pants or oversized clothes, or designer dress... She manages to make it all look really good.

"No... I don't think so." He whispers.

"For you, good sir!" Aiden's loud voice interrupts. The guy hands each of them some bowls.

Michael clears his throat and imitates the Asian's tone. "Ah. Thank you! Beef chili, huh?"

Jordan thanks him as well. She watch Maria taste the beef chili and almost burst out laughing at the disgusted look on her best friend's face. Feeling kinder, Michael scoops some mouthfuls and shoves it into his mouth. He makes a show of enjoying it. "That's top shelf, buddy. Really fresh."

He turns to Jordan with a sour face, forcing the chili down his throat. The blonde let out a quiet giggle.

Aiden takes a seat across from them. "You know, I really thought we'd have a big turnout but--"

"I told you not to go up against the cheerleader." Myra scolded from the corner.

"What cheerleader?" Maria asks.

Luis fixed his eyeglasses. "It's the mean blonde one with a convertible."

The girl rolls her eyes. "Giselle Collins? Ughhh."

Now that it was mentioned, Michael was indeed invited over by Giselle to her major graduation party which must have been tonight. He had completely forgotten about it as he was not really planning to go anywhere that night. That was, until he received the certain messages this afternoon.

"Yes." Aiden pouts. "She's having a party tonight as well. Must have dinged our turnout."

Michael puts down his bowl. "Do you guys wanna go there?"

To be continued...

▪️▪️▪️

Giselle's party coming next 😆😆

#playchoices #choices #high school story #hss #hss book 1 #hss book 2 #hss book 3 #maria flores #michael harrison #michael x mc #caleb mitchell #maria x mc #aiden zhou

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princessgracekelly1956 · 7 years ago

Photo

Daily Mirror - 16 June 1958

William Hickey joins with Photonews

For once let’s look closely at a single week-end... when a big name captures the kingdom

This Super Sinatra ‘rocks’ the Rainiers

MONTE CARLO, SUNDAY

This has been Frank Sinatra’s week-end in Monte Carlo - the swingiest, zingiest affair since that famous “swell party” that climaxed his film “High Society.’ And his Hollywood co-star Grace Kelly was the leading lady of this Wow of a Week-end under her new billing of Princess Grace of Monaco.

The excuse, if excuse were needed, was last night’s world premiere of his latest film “Kings Go Forth.” But this was the least exciting part of this Riviera fiesta that by tea-time yesterday had transformed this near-deserted little principality into a sun-drenched rendezvous for a thousand stars and celebrities.

By plane, car, and train they arrived, some having flown direct from Hollywood to support this giant of show business. And their journey was lavishly rewarded by one of the greatest song shows anyone here had ever heard.

At the gala supper after the film Sinatra left his seat next to Princess Grace and bounded on to the stage. He ran through a dozen of hid best-known numbers while the princess sat, hands clasped, eyes gleaming with excitement behind her spectacles and a smile curling the corners of her mouth.

In the huge, hot room of the International Sporting Club, with its waterfront decor, I could have heard a diamond drop as the 40-piece orchestra led into “When Your Lover Has Gone.”

Laughter in Mandalay

Then the mood switched to laughter as Sinatra ad-libbed his way through “The Road to Mandalay,” embroidering Kipling’s original with lines like “There’s a Burma broad a’settin’.” and “The cat gets a crazy thirst.”

After this one Sinatra must have noticed the puzzled look of Prince Rainier, who several times leaned across the table decorations to ask his wife for a translation into ordinary English.

For before going into “All the Way,” Sinatra hitched his trousers and said: “Sorry, I don’t speak enough French to explain all the words, but if any of you don’t understand just speak to the cat next to you and she’ll help you dig it.”

After three-quarters of an hour Sinatra finished with a tremendous beat-up of “The Lady is a Tramp,” leaped off the platform, and sloped back to the table where the Rainiers were leading the cheers and cries of “Encore,” “Bravo,” “More.”

He had promised it would be “a swingin’ night,” and there was an “I-told-you-so” look in his twinkling blue eyes as he acknowledged the tumult with a loose wave of his hand and a triumphant smile.

She whispers in his ear

As he sat down to gulp a drink, Princess Grace whispered in his ear. Two seconds later he was back on stage, gripping the mike and saying; “That was supposed to be it, but I’ve a request from our lovely lady of the evening. We haven’t rehearsed this but here is ‘You Make Me Feel So Young.’”

Then, turning to the musicians who were fumbling for their parts and looking confused, he chuckled: “Just read, boys. Don’t get nervous! But if you ‘blow’ this you are, out of the team.”

This was Sinatra - casual, confident, uninhibited to the point where he almost goes too far were it not for his enormous charm.

INTRODUCTION

To introduce him Noël Coward had broken off his conversation with Somerset Maugham. He said: “He is one of the great artists of our time. His taste is impeccable - I have never known him to make a false move.”

The gala party didn’t start until nearly midnight - the film had started nearly an hour late. So everybody was in a “let’s eat” mood when they got to the supper tables.

But the shouts of “Service, please,” and “Champagne” died into a breathless silence as the Rainiers came down the stairs.

Applause for the Rainiers

Princess Grace looked warm and lovely with a new crisp-curl short hair-do, rose-pink lipstick to match her high-necked gown of faille, a white mink wrap, and a spattering of diamonds and pearls that somehow looked discreet, although the stones were huge.

Everyone clapped as the prince, in a dinner jacket, guided her to their table, where the rest of the party - including Tina Onassis, Frank Ross and his wife, better remembered perhaps as actress Joan Caulfield, and Arthur Krim, head of United Artists - was waiting.

Sinatra’s date the Marquise de Portago - sat at another table with the Peter Lawfords.

Curt Jurgens and his constant companion Simone Bicheron were there. Lex Barker in a white dinner jacket, had just flown in from Rome. Mr. and Mrs. Howard Keel, Mr. and Mrs. Michael Wilding, Mai Zetterling, Delphi Lawrence, Adrienne Corri and April Olrieh from England, laughed at the gay tables.

Don Loper, from California, was squiring Betty Furness, who wore a flue-brush wig for some reason.

The real king of the party

But there was no doubt that even in the presence of his royal friends Frank Sinatra was king.

As people congratulated him on his film performance, he said: “It’s strange, I know that film so well by now - but I cried.”

This was Sinatra - the man with the tender heart who does many kindnesses that are never known.

Mrs. Ross, who has known him for years told me: ‘He’s a paradox. Although he talks like a gangster he is a truly gentle man.

‘He always works in reverse - if somebody wants him to behave this way or do a certain thing he will do just the opposite. It’s his game, and you have to play it his way.”

Certainly it all worked out his way last night.

A date at dawn...

The Rainiers danced till 3 a.m. Then at dawn today Sinatra invited a few friends back to the suite she was sharing with the Lawfords - a suite I had left at 6 a.m. yesterday. He was in an exuberant mood. “That Grace is just adorable,” he said. “And her prince is really charming.

“Do you know, he went out of his way to say ‘Thank you for having us - it’s been such a wonderful evening.’ Man, it was a gas, wasn’t it?”

SEA FOOD

I had joined him on Friday at an eve-of-premiere party in the open air at a sea-food restaurant at Cap Martin.

Sinatra, co-host with producer Frank Ross, sat with Mr. and Mrs. Peter Lawford at a table a little apart from the main group - which included Hedda Hopper, Leonard Lyons, Ludwig Bemelmans, and Earl Wilson.

He played the perfect host, until, hemmed in by serenading guitarists and flamenco dancers, he decided he’d had enough.

“Let’s go back to town,” he said. “I hear there’s a big crap game going on at the casino.”

There was no big dice game, but when a few late-nighters straggled into the casino bar he stood drinks until 2 a.m. yesterday and then took some of us back to his suite.

The man who likes company

While his records played softly in the background, he drank Bourbon whisky, defined a “broad” as ‘a “loveable dame,” and wandered out on to the balcony to describe the thin crescent moon cradling a star as “a ring-a-ding version of the Turkish flag.”

We argued about where an entertainer’s private life begins and ends. “I left Rome,” he said, “because everywhere I went someone stuck a camera in my face.”

This was Sinatra - the man who loves company in the small hours, who sits up all night and sleeps all day.

THE SINGER

Some wit has remarked that Sinatra’s is the only place you wear a black tie and take sunglasses.

When I left at 6 a.m. yesterday the sun was up looking like thunder out of Mentone ‘cross the bay.

But The Singer was sitting alone taking off his shoes with one hand and trying to get some jazz on a transistor set with the other.

A cigarette for a baton

Next time he appeared was around 5 yesterday afternoon to rehearse the band specially flown down from Paris.

In an open-neck orange shirt, white linen jacket and dark trousers, with his straw snap-brim hat tilted sometimes back, sometimes forward over his eyes, he drilled the musicians in every nuance of the arrangements while waiters laid tables, electricians tested lights, porters humped in flowering plants, and 50 flashlights blinked from the wings.

With a cigarette for a baton he raised his arms and spread them wide to indicate the full surge of a crescendo.

With arms crossed or hands stuck in pockets to prevent, I suspect, the trousers sliding right off his slim hips, he whistled or beat time with his foot for two hours - but always with a curious stillness that never wasted gesture.

After “Moonlight in Vermont” he nodded “C’est bon” and gathered up his music. He had an hour before he was due at that premiere.

This was Sinatra - the perfectionist who, though he plays no instrument and cannot read music, has developed his own incomparable technique for songs with a snap or songs with a sigh.

#Frank Sinatra #Princess Grace #1958 #50s #William Hickey #Daily Mirror #newspaper

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royalnightoutphff · 8 years ago

Text

Chapter Twenty-Two

A/N: This is veryyy fluffy but I'm feeling it :) As always, let me know what you think and don't be afraid to send any feedback!

Lexy had told a lot of people good-bye in her life. Her mom, for starters. And the kids when she left for school, over and over again. Saying good-bye to Nicole, and to Ana, and to Carrie when she left for Oxford had been awful, just like saying bye to Michael and Amelia and Liz. But nothing could have prepared her for saying good-bye to Harry at 5am as he dropped her off at the airport.

“Don’t cry, babe,” he told her, watching as she tearfully watched a plane land. “You’re going to make me cry.”

“I’d actually like to see that,” she said turning to face him finally. “I’ve never seen you cry.”

She smiled, despite the tears running down her face. Harry wiped them away.

“Google it.”

Lexy laughed and unbuckled her seatbelt, reaching across the console to hug him. It was fine, until Harry apparently decided he wanted her closer and Lexy ended up climbing across the console. Harry helped situate her until finally she was seated on his lap, her back against the steering wheel.

“Well, this is cozy,” she said. Harry grinned and kissed her, holding the back of her head with a whole lot of strength before running his hand over and over her hair. When they broke away, he smiled.

“This is certainly different from when I said bye to you at Heathrow. You were trying to run away.”

“I was sad!” She defended. She would’ve crossed her arms if she had the room. “I’m still sad. But it’s different now.”

“God,” Harry swallowed. “I’m going to miss you so fucking much.”

“Stop. I’m going to cry again.”

Harry shook his head. “I’ll speak with someone as soon as I get home about your internship. We’ll figure it out.”

Lexy nodded, leaning her head on his chest. She’d never taken into account how cramped the front seat of cars were but it meant the close proximity to Harry, so she was fine with it.

“Life is so stupid,” she muttered. “I don’t understand why we have to be in different places.”

“Well, long-term, you graduate in about a year.”

“I should’ve spent the entire year abroad in England. I don’t know why I didn’t.”

“Think about the summer. That’s three months.”

“Won’t you have to go somewhere?”

Harry shrugged. “Only Canada, for Invictus. That should be it. I already did an overseas tour late last year, so I should be fine.”

“And you’re sure I should stay at your place the entire time? That’s a long time. What if you get tired of me?”

Harry silenced her with a look. “Honestly, if you stayed at a hotel, it’d probably be a waste of money.”

“We’ve only been dating for almost two months.”

“We’ve basically been dating since December. You only decided to catch on in February.”

“You didn’t ask me in December!”

“And when I did ask, it took you almost an entire month to decide. So yeah, we’ve basically been dating since December. You think I would have my brother open his house for just anyone?”

Lexy shook her head. “You’re too much.”

“You’re going to miss it.”

Lexy nodded solemnly. She really would. “I only have two classes tomorrow. I could skip them. And work. I could skip that too.”

“But you won’t.” He lifted a hand to rub her cheek. And Lexy nodded, knowing he was right. “Besides, I’ve got work tomorrow too. And I’m going to be tired as fuck.”

“What time will you get in?”

“Two in the morning, my time.”

“So that’s nine pm here,” she nodded. “You’ll call me? When you get there? So I know that your plane didn’t crash?”

“You’d probably hear about it on the news if it did,” Harry teased. “Imagine a plane crashing with me in it.”

“I’d get a CNN alert. And BBC.”

“You get BBC news alerts?”

“I like to remain unbiased. So yeah, I do.”

“That’s adorable. But yeah, I’ll call you. I’ll probably be up all night, anyway. I’ll be stuck on your time and you don’t like to go to sleep early, apparently.”

“I used to. At Oxford, and at your house, I did. It’s only here that I don’t. I think Oxford was a lot easier than Princeton. I’m up all night here. Everyone is. Nicole’s worse than me. She’s the only reason I can sleep with the light on.”

“Yet another reason you should’ve stayed for the whole year,” he thumbed her lip. “You wouldn’t have been as stressed.”

“You haven’t seen me stressed. Not till finals week gets here.”

“I’ll have to remember that. I’ll send you some chocolates.”

Lexy smiled and kissed him again, knowing that there were only so many left within the last few minutes they had together. She loved feeling Harry’s body heat against hers, the way his beard was rough on her skin, the feeling of her fingers running through his hair. It was so soft.

“You should probably get going. I’m not going to buy you a ticket if you miss your flight,” Harry told her. “Even if it was my fault.”

“Hey!” Lexy exclaimed, laughing as she attempted to climb back over into her seat before realizing it wasn’t going to happen. She climbed over Harry instead, opening his door and standing on the pavement. Harry copied her and before long, he was helping her get her luggage out of the back.

She set her backpack on the ground and watched as he closed the trunk, Mitch and Max in their car a little way away from them. She threw up a hand to wave at them and they both waved back. Harry was leaving that car at the airport rental service and would be riding back with the POs. At least he wouldn’t be alone, she decided. She would be making the entire journey back just by herself.

Lexy reached for him again, wrapping her arms around his torso. Harry’s head was on top of hers and he cradled her to him, rubbing his hand down her upper back. She breathed in his scent one last time as Harry tilted her face up to his, and they kissed for the last time for months.

When they broke apart, he held her face close to his, looking into her eyes. “Now listen,” he said, his breath smelling of the peppermint it tasted like from his toothpaste. “If your plane crashes I probably won’t get a notification, so don’t let it crash, alright? You do whatever you have to for that not to happen.”

Lexy giggled. “Okay. I’ll do my best.”

“Not your best, I want your word.”

“You have my word.”

Harry smiled. “Good. I’ll see you in May?”

Lexy nodded. “I’ll text you when I land in Newark. Hopefully you won’t be in the air yet.”

“Either way go for it, I’ll probably buy Wi-Fi. I get quite bored without it.”

Lexy rolled her eyes and took a step away from him. “Of course you do.”

“Hey, we can’t all be entertained by books.”

“Actually…”

“Shut up,” he mumbled, kissing her once more. “Be safe, Lex. We’ll facetime soon?”

She nodded, “As soon as we’re both on land again. If I’m not asleep.”

Harry shook his head, giving her a disappointed look. “See you soon.”

“Bye,” she told him, grabbing the handle of her suitcase and wheeling away from him, not even the least bit worried that she was under two hours before her flight took off, something that ordinarily would have had her rather worried. She only looked back once and when she did, Harry lifted a hand to wave at her.

And then, once she was inside, printing her ticket out and checking in, she knew that Harry was gone, but it didn’t bother her as much as it should have, because she knew this time, that it wasn’t the end.

Lexy was grumpy when her plane touched down in Newark. Neither her nor Harry had managed to get much sleep the night before. Lexy had been more surprised with Harry’s lack of sleep than hers, as he seemed to possess an ability to fall asleep anywhere in a short period of time. But he’d stayed up all night holding her, talking about irrelevant things, like the finale of Friends and whether Rachel was wrong for getting off the plane for Ross.

Lexy had said she was, that no one should be responsible for interrupting their own career plan. She thought that they could still be together even if Rachel was in Paris. Harry disagreed. He thought it was the ultimate gesture.

On the plane right beside her, there had been a couple. And everywhere she looked people were holding hands or talking intimately. Lexy had been away from Harry for approximately three hours and twenty-two minutes, but she missed him as if she hadn’t seen him in months.

Some man behind her handed her her carry-on from the overhead bin and Lexy smiled in thanks. Finally, she exited the plane and was able to purchase her train ticket back to campus. When she finally had a moment, she pulled out her phone to text Harry. Twenty seconds later he was calling her.

“I’m so bored,” Harry said in greeting.

“Shouldn’t you be taking off soon?”

“My flight got delayed. So I’m sitting alone and I only just realized how tired I am. This is your fault.”

“Oh not even,” Lexy rolled her eyes even though he couldn’t see her. “Where are Mitch and Max?”

“Here. Max is playing Candy Crush and Mitch is doing something. I can’t quite tell what it is. Oh, he says hi.”

Lexy giggled. “Tell him I say hi too. Are there a lot of people there?”

“Eh, normal amount, I’d say. I only just got here an hour ago but I was able to skip most of security. I was trying to keep a low profile but sometimes it doesn’t work, y’know, the ginger hair and all.”

“People recognized you?” His words about someone finding him in the airport floated back up, Lexy knowing that people would read into why Harry was in Charlotte after Princeton.

“A few. I spoke to them. They were all Americans except for this one British couple.” He laughed. “The woman camped out for William’s wedding.”

Lexy smiled to herself and stepped onto the open airtrain that would take her to the train terminal. There were a few other people in her car, one couple who was speaking in what sounding like Arabic and two others who had earbuds in. Lexy didn’t mind them and continued her conversation.

“I told you Sara and I stayed up all night, didn’t I?”

“Let me end this relationship right now,” Harry joked. “No, but I think that’s cute. I think. Honestly, at the moment, I think everything you do is cute, so I guess I’m probably not speaking the truth and it’s actually quite weird.”

Lexy smiled at his words, feeling just the same as him but opting out of saying it. “You say really nice things when you’re tired.”

“Hey,” he argued. “I say nice things all the time.”

“Whatever,” she muttered into the phone, still smiling. The railroad was approaching and she figured she should wrap the conversation up. “I should probably go, I’m almost to the train.”

“But I still have an hour until boarding starts!”

“What in the world do you do when no one is around you? If you’re this bored.”

“I have stuff to do. But not in fucking airports, where it’s hot and stuffy and there’s so many people around in bad moods.”

Lexy herself was more of a fan of airports, preferring them to the planes. In the airports it seemed like everyone had somewhere to go, making her feel that she too, had somewhere to go and was important. She told Harry as much and he made a disgusted sound.

“That’s bullshit. Literally everyone in the entire world hates airports. You’re lying to me.”

“I am not.”

“Are too.”

Lexy rolled her eyes at his childishness and stepped onto the train platform. “Anyway, I’m at the train now, so I should probably go.”

“Is the train already there?”

“No.”

“Then you can continue talking until it does.”

“You’re being so bossy today,” she replied, wheeling her suitcase so she could lean against the wall. “I don’t know who you think you are.”

He laughed, a deep throaty one. “I know perfectly well who I am, Lex. I bet you wish you did too.”

“Now you’re just not making any sense. I think you should take a nap. Have Mitch or Max watch over your stuff.”

“Then I’ll just have to wake up in an hour. I’ll wait till I get to the plane, then I can have uninterrupted sleep.”

“You’re so needy,” she told him, watching as the train started to approach the platform. “The train’s here. I’ll text you?”

“Sure, sure,” he mumbled. “Bye, Sexy Lexy.”

Lexy rolled her eyes at his antics, wondering how people managed to deal with him if he always acted like that. She stepped onto the train, finding herself a window seat and beginning to play Ed Sheeran again. She didn’t know if it was because they were both ginger, or because they were both British, or because of the music itself, but whatever way, Lexy loved listening to Ed while she was leaving Harry. It gave her hope that she’d be going right back to him someday.

“Sexy Lexy!” Nicole called as soon as Lexy opened the door to their room. “How are you babycakes? How was home? Did you and Harry have sex yet?”

Lexy glared at her as she threw her suitcase on the ground. “Literally if you ask me about that one more time, I’m switching roommates.”

“I just want to know what a royal dick is like,” she muttered.

“Nicole!” Lexy exclaimed. “I’m sure it’s no different than any…other,” she finally muttered, clearly uncomfortable.

“That’s what you think. I bet Harry’s real good in bed. He seems powerful. And have you seen those biceps?”

Lexy grumbled something unintelligible and took off her shoes, putting her hair back into a knot on top of her head. She was cold and she was tired, and she wished that Harry was there beside her. Her texts hadn’t been delivering to him so she assumed he’d fallen asleep before deciding to buy Wi-Fi.

“How was home?” Nicole asked as she watched Lexy begin to unpack her things, paying special attention to what was clean and what wasn’t.

“It was fine. My dad got really drunk. Sara’s apparently having an affair that Chance doesn’t know about. Levi looks like a little person now.”

Nicole laughed. “Your family has more issues than anyone I’ve ever met. You might as well have a tv show.” She opened her economics book in front of her. “How did Harry deal with all of it?”

“Perfectly. Like he does with everything. I got really mad one day and we just drove for hours. Honestly, it really does seem like he’s perfect as hell, and I don’t know why I deserve that.”

“Because you’re perfect as hell. I’ve never met anyone who works harder than you at one you do. And to be honest, I’ve never met anyone who has had a life as rough as you. It’s about time you get something good out of it.”

Lexy frowned to herself but kept unpacking. Then, by some chance of fate or whatever what going on in her life, she pulled out Harry’s t-shirt, that despite all of Lexy’s efforts to organize the luggage perfectly, had somehow found its way into her luggage.

She threw on the ground and Nicole looked up again. “I hate this. Why does everyone get to date someone who lives near them but me?”

“Stop being so dramatic,” Nicole said, rolling her eyes. “You’ll see him again soon.”

“Your boyfriend goes here.”

“Josh and I broke up.”

Lexy’s mouth fell open. How could she have been so selfish to not talk to her roommate to find that out? “When?”

“Last week. We’re just in different places now.”

“I’m sorry Nicole, I should’ve asked you.”

Nicole shook her head. “You had your own problems to worry about.”

“I’ll make it up to you? We’ll go on a date soon. Just us.”

Nicole laughed. “Let’s get dressed up. Take a few shots. The usual.”

Lexy nodded. “How is econ going?”

“Awful,” the girl responded. “I don’t know why I decided to major in this shit.”

“Yeah I feel you, I might have to take a lab next year and I don’t know how that’s going to work.”

“Sexy Lexy can do anything.” Nicole smirked, placing the bottom of her pen back in her mouth and going back to reading over her book. Lexy turned to look at her and then decided to say nothing, focusing on the folding of her clothes.

Lexy felt a lot of love for her roommate in that moment and for just how lucky she had been to have her in her life. Then she thought about Ana, who she hadn’t spoken to since making it back on campus, and decided she should definitely make plans for later.

And then Lexy thought about Carrie, and whether or not she was worth forgiving. Or whether or not she even should forgive her. She decided she was too mad in the moment and stood up abruptly.

She slid on her jacket and Nicole asked where she was going.

“I’m going to go see Ana. I haven’t seen her in a while.”

Nicole nodded and Lexy left, turning her earphones up as loud as they would go, Mike Posner’s voice singing her into her mood.

“Hey baby bitch,” Ana told her minutes later when she arrived at her room. Ana’s roommate was abroad in Cuba for the semester, leaving Ana to have the entire room to herself. Lexy ran her eyes over the girl’s outfit, taking into account the pair of shorts she was wearing despite the chilly temperature outside. “How was Tennessee? How are the babies?”

Ana was the only person on campus who knew Lexy’s family situation in its entirety. She had visited the summer after their freshman year came to an end.

“Good, they’re good,” Lexy answered, shedding her jacket and sitting on top of her bed. “They really liked Harry.”

“I have yet to meet this fine fellow Harry. We should arrange that.”

Lexy laughed. “He’s in a different time zone.”

“My mom is in a different time zone. Doesn’t stop her from calling me from time to time.”

Lexy rolled her eyes and decided to change the subject, talking about Ana’s essay she was writing, and the occurrences of her life, before they ended right back full circle to Harry. Ana requested that Lexy facetime him. Or at least, attempt to.

“It’s too late for him. He might not even answer.”

“A man should always answer when his girlfriend calls in the middle of the night. It could be a booty call.”

Lexy pushed Ana who fell backwards laughing. Before she could stop her though, Ana had grabbed her phone off of the desk and unlocked it swiftly, knowing her passcode easily through years of friendship. And as Lexy got up to take it from her, the sounds of a ringing facetime echoed throughout the room. Lexy hung her head in her hands when Harry picked up.

“Hello?” Lexy didn’t have to see his expression to tell that he was squinting at the camera, probably in a great deal of confusion as Ana was holding it extremely close to her face.

“Hi Harry, I’m Ana. We didn’t get the opportunity to meet while you were here but I wanted you to know that Lexy’s my bitch.”

Lexy wanted nothing more than to slap Ana. She couldn’t help the feeling of relief when she heard Harry’s laughter through the phone. She sat up a little straighter and Ana moved the phone so that he could see both of them.

Harry smiled softly at her. “Good evening, love. You look wonderful.”

Ana squealed at it and Lexy had to stop herself from making a face, as she was wearing no makeup, her hair was piled atop her head, and she was wearing a t-shirt. She took in Harry’s countenance instead, observing the way that his eyes were slightly sunken in and there were obvious bags.

“Well, you look awful.”

Harry threw back his head in laughter at the same time as Ana hit Lexy on the knee. “Idiota!” She scolded.

Lexy smiled and ignored her. “Did you get home just now?”

“Yeah. It was too quiet and a bit lonely. Maybe I should get a dog.”

“William’s not there?”

“They’re in Norfolk right now. They should be back soon.”

Lexy frowned. “Oh, well, you shouldn’t get a dog.”

Harry squinted at her. “Why?”

Ana ran a hand through her hair, deciding once and for all it was her turn to have a place in the conversation. “Lexy doesn’t like dogs. I do, though.”

“You don’t like dogs?!”

“They’re just a bit annoying. But I’m not stopping you from doing anything.” She crossed her arms. “If you really want a dog, get one.”

Harry shook his head. “Such a pity. I’m not at home much so that’s the real reason I don’t have one. Maybe someday.”

Ana smiled and Lexy had to smile too, just because her best friend was grinning at her so much. Lexy was glad her friends were seeming to like Harry just as much as she had, though it wasn’t too much of a surprise as Harry just had that personality.

“We should probably let you go,” Lexy told him after a few more minutes of conversation. “I don’t want to be responsible for you being tired at work tomorrow.”

Harry waved his hand in the air in response. “It’s already going to happen. You’re probably right. I’ll call you tomorrow?”

Lexy smiled at him again. “Good night, Haz.”

“Good night, Lex. It was nice meeting you, Ana.”

When Harry was gone for the night and as soon as the call ended, Ana just simply looked at Lexy, smiling. She didn’t need to say anything at all because her smile said everything.

If Lexy could just get a handle on all of her assignments and her essays, she’d be golden.

#princeharry #prince harry fanfiction #princeharryfanfic #phff #princeharryfanfiction

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