#Met Ingame

[approachme4fun]

Why Im Over MissBanshee....Finally

Lovelife Ended

Since my last blogpost,MissBanshee went ahead and made a horrendes "hang Approach out to dry",camoed as a "adressing the situation". Where she without any sort of proof,tossed at me personality traits as a Stalker,a Weirdo and a Creep.

Like Theo Von said when a prostitute called him a pervert and a creep: "Well,im defintly not a creep!".

Stalking? Make it make sence that someone who has been deeply in love with you daily going on the 6th month and therefor for almost half a year fully,overnight turns into a stalker???? It doesnt make any fucking sence,from one day being sweet love and someone neither can get enough of,to the other day: fucking weirdo,fucking creep,fucking stalker!!! (Your own words on a stream!)

None of my friends who looks at us both as friends,or at least tries to look at the entire situation as objectively as possible,states that you have no reason to call a super recent boyfriend turned ex by you,a stalker/weirdo/creep.

Again,i adressed this in a Twitter article,how i have withnessed own female family members getting new IDs and a new location to live,top secret,to be protected against stalkers. They wanted the individual both mental and physical harm. I could NEVER hurt YOU intentionally! You know this better then anyone else,you said so yourself countless of times: "you dont have a bad bone in your body".

If i unintentionally hurt you,then i will fall to my knees and apologize the very moment i become aware! Well,if you let me that is......and i have proven this time and time again,its all in our endless amount of discord conversations over these almost full 6 months.

You also called me a creep? Only creep im looking at myself as in between,is when i listen to Radioheads song Creep.

Whatever you thought you had on me,to legitimize hanging me out to dry as all that,you DONT! But you did it anyway,wich proves to me not just that i invested alot more into our relationship,but you also dont feel anything for me.

You had a chance to highlight my good sides too over 2 fucking hours of hanging me out to dry,where you indirectly at first encouraged people to attack my twitter,and people in your own community to make up wild stories about me being married to children (one of your new mods btw),while the other sugardaddy Mod took things completely out of context,to show theyr true fucking colours!

And other people you said you disliked personally,and hadnt even been in your streams in forever,all of a sudden were there talking massive smack about me.

And yes,someone that is being shut out of someones life they have literally lived for the last half year,will be searching up streams to see how you cope with the breakup yourself,if you mention them at all for some closure,if anything. I would find it really fucking cold and unusual if someones partner DIDNT look up theyr partner in a similar situation.

I admit,my amount of text at certain social medias was abit too much,ideally speaking. But i was desperate for some answers,some closure so i knew what the fuck was happening,and quite frankly....had you answered me,put some effort yourself into the mix,alot of what you reacted so badly upon would never have been mentioned. I know this,and you know this.

Makes me wonder how much your mom really did read,if she was of such a bombastic impression of me. Didnt bother to tell her how i actually treated you day in and day out,for almost full half year hah?

Figures...... it seems to be an ongoing thing with you,while my whole idea was to also highlight your good sides and abilities wich i love.....or loved. Because they are now just imagination to me......never real. Something you can thank yourself for......

I have never mistreated anyone like you described on your "hang out Approach" stream. Funny that i should start with you,when it all has been explained with me being exhausted (no sleep),pain wich also resulted in deep depression,dumb reversed psychology was also in the mix,plus i was already upset over the latest neglect.

Blame me for waiting and waiting,staring at the wall,then back on discord,starting to do other stuff while waiting,as i thought your internet really was out for soo long,only to find you in a lobby with the same people you claimed to me that you had told: "Only me and my mans are gonna hang out this weekend!" Is it really soo much to ask for,to get a heads up? You knew this from previous neglects,how my head gets messed up over knowing only after the damage is done.

You need to update me!!!! Its soo easy to avoid these types of arguments,geezus fucking christ!!! You knew about my past of hurting and huge mistrust towards women,and you repeatedly promised me that you would never......

I kept my promise at least,i fucked up massively ONE TIME,and thats when you block me,when the depression is thick as a mist on my words! You know i would never break up with you,it was depression talk! So when i realized you had blocked me,it gave a ping in my head,i got super worried,regretful.....i just wanted to embrace you right away,reassure you that i would never go anywhere.

Then i get a screenshot sent of you saying to Megyhs that youre gonna do "a tactical death and give Megyhs your twitch". Thats when i really got scared of losing you,and i became even more desperate of getting you to talk to me!

CANT YOU SEE IT???!!!!!! *Smacks my own head real hard* If you only used your head for a tiny bit,instead of being soo stuck up in your own onesided imagination of me all of a sudden.

We both went into our relationship knowing about us both having mental health issues. I treated you and that fact with the outmost respect! I only stomped abit in the salad 1 time over a half a year period,and i have not stopped punishing me over going on 2 weeks straight now,for that massive blunder.

I should have never talked to you that morning,how harsh it sounds i should have made sure that i was more lightheaded first.

But now knowing how you are not only on another guy already,but you do the exact same things together in discord that we used to do etc,makes it obvious to be soo much more then just a joke that your excuse was on the "hang out Approach" stream.

Its like you defintly had this planned. You even did a full 180 on the emotes we spent so much time planning,only thing you kept was your Stitch theme. Everything else you got wrid of real fast.

Yeah....you were never as invested in the relationship as i was.

Only reason im able to write this,is because i actually tried to eat something for the first time in probably a week+s time,and unfortunately i threw it up again,im really messed up over this.....

Because of the vomiting i started shaking uncontrollably,it got soo massive that i thought my heart was gonna stop,then i blacked out (my whole body was shaking uncontrollably) I was exhausted....

I came to myself with a pounding headache,and a back that had locked itself,also being in pain. Yeah,this is the "creep,weirdo and stalker" you described alright....

You know creepers and stalkers shut off theyr emotions pretty well right,as they often got some fucked up mental illnes thing too? They dont care as warmly and passionate about theyr loved one,as i did with you.

Are you proud of yourself now,MissBanshee__? Will you tell your mom that you were in your wrongs to cast these personality traits on me? Nah,i think you thrive being in your position right now.

Interesting how your new sugardaddy is donating all over the place now,to kiss ass and get connections,it all seems very fake. I never hated on him for gifting subs btw,as you wrongfully claimed recently,with your immatured "dodging the actual problem",by taking things out of context. I used him as an example over someone you honestly barely know compared to me,and still you warned me by donating too much money on you,as you had blocked friends in the past who did this.

You wanted to refund me my 10K bits i once gave you,but you said nothing against your new sugardaddy "bestie bestie bestie" after barely knowing them a couple of weeks+,when he not only went over me in bitties in total,but on top of that gifted subs and bought shit from your throne.

Oh yeah,i have been building my case alright. I dont care much for your lame excuses anymore. You cant wiggle your way out of these facts.

One of your community members has even impersonated me,trying to make it sound like i called you ugly. HAH! Look at my twitter reply to this very thing. I always defended you,even now when you turned me into an emotional mess,and im barely clinging onto life really.

And i told you this was gonna happen,if i ended up falling for you,and you shut me out of your life or stabbed me in my back/in my heart....

But you still did.....

I got my blame to take for this argument leading up to it,where i wish i kept a clear head,loved you and agreed to us spending time together. Instead of suffering,losing my cool.....then deciding to take a breather on my own,where the plan was to make you happy again the next morning. It all sounded soo easy in my head.....then that morning came,and i wasnt myself at all.

But you didnt exactly help.....when you saw me in that state of mind,you should have said "Babe,i love you!" or "Babe,are you okay?".

Those works as "pings" in my head,i manage to shift focus/break out of the pattern and by focusing on you still loving me,i will also focus on giving you my love. And i start feeling better.......

But you expected me on your "hang me out to dry stream",to do it all by just asking for reassurance? Has it ever occured to you,that my mind doesnt function like that whenever im that "messed up"?

It doesnt happen often thankfully,thats why i often kept my distance abit. Not to be an asshole,but i wanted to protect you incase i bursted out something spontaneous i later on regret.

You seemed totally fine with it,the few times it happened and i managed to avoid us having missunderstandings over it.

And btw,Mei/Meijika offered herself/himself (i dont know if theyre all an act or what,but several people do question this individual) to reach out to you on my behalf,AFTER i had reassured them that they didnt have to do anything on my behalf.

They said they had thought it over,and offered out of the blue to write you. Thats when i first hesitated knowing how you had treated me up till that point,but then my head was like "maybe another female manages to reach in to my love?". But her reply back to me an hour later,told me that you had been seriously pissy at her,telling her that it was none of her buisness..... But she offered herself.....lets make that perfectly clear.

She then goes onto asking me to never contact her again (lol,she was the eager one to add me in the first place,calling me boo constantly,wich ill come back to in a sec)

I know how much you disliked Meijika according to yourself and your history with her,and next thing i know,shes constantly in your streams,calling you BOO and asking if you got room for her.......

You are soo easy to expose..... I hate that i feel soo much for you still.

But its finally time,to make that difficult standpoint once and for all. If i die i die,but at least i made the best closure for myself.

I will let my soul,my brain and body take the time they need to get over you,and then i wont be looking back,ever! I will stop having my door open for you to come back,because you obviously didnt invest as much into our relationship as i did,and you have had a complete change of character,how you run your streams,how you let people you hated become your VIPs and literally SPAM chat wildly.

Talk about a immatured chaos. I would think it was run by one of your younger siblings and not you,who i thought i got to know over soon half a year.

I will always cherish our memories,because they gave me a fake feeling of finally meeting THE ONE for me,and i looked forward into creating TONS of more situations and experiences like that. I thought i had finally found happiness,a purpose in life......but looking at us now,how one constantly tried for the longest to get his loved one back,or at least to talk to him again,if only for a little while,was met with a cold,aggressive,destructive wall of silence.

And after that,direct personal attacks,from someone that should know me better then so. (And now people that constantly made you freak out before stream if they messaged you,is also VIPs and screen mascots...HOW ABOUT THAT!)

And before you try to excuse that away with "people do change": Do they really change that much in 1 or 2 weeks? And most importantly: WHERE THE FUCK WAS MY CHANCE??!!! You literally unblock/take back guys/community members that has treated you way waaay worse then me!

For the first time im just gonna say it,respectfully: You were not worthy of my time,MissBanshee__! I loved you waaaay more then you loved me! Remember? I always told you "i love you moar",because i meant that shit. You started copying me,but just to tell me what i wanted to hear.... I figured you out in the end,you became good at "telling me what i wanted to hear",just not when it mattered the most.

Like avoiding that argument leading you into blocking me.

Nope,just blame it all on me,one who doesnt have that much more life experience then you have,i told you all about that too. Strange,how easily you chose to forget about certain things,and angle and nitpick on other things,as you claim me to be.....

Takes 1 to know 1 i guess......... Not until i begged people not to go after you and disrespect you,be mean to you,did you do a similar thing in your horrendes "Approach stream".

You loved to pick on a man almost out of energy for theyr writing skills/english,did i ever go at you for your messed up way of writing? No,im not petty like that..... So why the fuck did you?

I could keep going,but im feeling drained again,drinking alot of liquid is all i do in the heat. I feel like i could sleep for a thousand years,but everytime i try i cant.....

This song once described what i would do for you daily,and what you meant to me. Let me ask again: Is this the feelings and thoughts of a stalking,creepy weirdo?! So i watched you after you blocked and banned me? I FUCKING LOVED YOU,AND I SEEKED ANSWERS,COMFORT AND REASSURANCE!! It makes me fucking upset that some people act as dumb as this,just so they can throw more toxicity in there,and destroy another humanbeing COMPLETELY!!! I hope you and your mom is truly proud of yourselfs!

And before you get all agrovated and wants to jump in my throat for involving her: YOU INVOLVED YOUR OWN FUCKING MOM AGAINST ME,ON A FUCKING STREAM WATCHED BY ALMOST 300 PEOPLE!!

TF IS WRONG WITH YOU??! Yeah,im over you alright.......

And way to go to completely copy Rkive with your "new viewers,dont be shy/scared,say hello heart heart heart". Could you be anymore fake? PLEASE.... FINITO!

One final thing: You claimed you had read every single article,blogpost. But i call horseshit,because if you actually read it with interest,you would have felt sorry for shutting me out cold,you would have felt guilt yourself,and you would have done more to win me back yourself,at least the MissBanshee__ i once knew or thought i knew. I doubt you will ever read this last post either,so this is a final goodbye. Please do me a favor though,stick to your own click of communities. I dont have much left,and the only 2-3 streams i feel like i can relax somewhat in,you constantly come barging into.

Gimme some fucking space!

[realkeylogger]

something terrible is happening to me

[carlyraejepsans]

anyway ghost trick rules

[prettyboymeat]

grusha scribbles

[zxyacb]

first meeting

[elveny]

Meet my Rook, Mira de Riva ♥

Antivan Crow, Rogue and charms the pants off you before you realize it.

Yes, she's adorable, why do you ask?

[randomminty]

Hi yes hello I love your octopath art very much :D

Your art style is so nice (also you draw hikari really cute hgjfjdncncnc)

THANK YOUUU i love hikari.beautiful little thing

[thebinturong]

Anyway yes I finally finished the character portrait the second I completed the game. Nuala, my Watcher. Really cannot do her weirdness justice tbh but whatever I still like the picture.

[get-more-bald]

the biggest thing about X6 is not that he doesn't think of himself as human (though he doesn't, and according to some it's correct) BUT that he doesn't see himself as a Person

[yael-art-den]

(WIP) This is Robbie, the wettest, saddest musician you'll ever seen

[wall-eye]

A family could be this.

[gothamcityneedsme]

i DO think flynn should come back and like. before hallelujah becomes the new boss of the Ashura-kai, the Ashura-kai shops are 'former Ashura-kai' and are 'everyone's shops' but like then post that, they ARE Ashura-kai again and tbh. that should piss flynn right tf off.

[harrycollins]

Abelard: Calligos Winterscale's penchant for attacking first and asking questions later and-

Tiberius:

[pinkyjulien]

[gauntghoul]

everyone being like oooo aaauughhh kaeyas a khaenri'ah spy woooaahhhh. but like everytime we learn more indeptg lore abt him its lit just yeah i lit have no knowledge abt that place at all. shrugs. and now ive lived in mond for so long idrc

[papa-poutine]

Ok but for real what is with enver gortash's lesbian manicure