#Marya Hornbacher

[resqectable]

And yet you are all that you have, so you must be enough. There is no other way.

Marya Hornbacher, Wasted: A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia

[mqmotivate]

And yet you are all that you have, so you must be enough. There is no other way. Marya Hornbacher,

[deviika]

Marya Hornbacher // Maya Angelou

[dr4gme]

About wocwog HJ. I love him. He's so raw, and there's so much pain and rage.

[thoughtkick]

And yet you are all that you have, so you must be enough. There is no other way.

Marya Hornbacher, Wasted: A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia

[llovelymoonn]

ellen bass poetry of presence: an anthology of mindfulness poems: "the thing is" \\ marya hornbacher waiting (via @weltenwellen) \\ tory dent collected poems: "us"

kofi

[asoftepiloguemylove]

Ruta Sepetys "Emilia;" Salt to the Sea // Cynthia Cruz "The Glimmering Room;" Diagnosis // @herchainsaregone // Jamie Varon Does The Universe Fight For Souls To Be Together? // The Edge of Seventeen (2016) dir. Kelly Fremon Craig // Marya Hornbacher Wasted: A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia // Sue Zhao // Clementine von Radics // pinterest // Billie Eilish What Was I Made For?

[sinligh]

In the name of healing I bite chunks of myself daily, spit them out in my hand with the intention to wash it away later

Eventually, i end up over analyzing them, like everything else in my life

grafts of all the causes I’m still here, glued together by my mother’s fears

be the Alpha female, she said. “feed on your most beloved, a cup of the moon’s blood every night before bed for you to run alone forever, run wild, never slip”

I Shower myself with self-loathing, lick my own wounds close Keep me sane, keep me safe

loneliness to me is just another insecurity that is dangling from my prefrontal cortex, dangling right in front of my eyes… for me to see the world through it.

I spend hours looking at the bloody chunks in my hand, thinking where did i go wrong ? how much can I hold on to this heartache ?

I've been running around it all my life, running around red lines, red lines circle me, i run in circles around myself I’m all that I’ve ever knew, yet, I only know myself in fading

A distant memory, a deja vu…

All I really know, is that the only stable in my life is the fact that I exist, and that it’s a temporary state.

jamais vu.

will the lines fade if i eat what i bit off of myself again ? if i chew and chew and chew… If i teach myself to stomach it will i be whole again?

is holding on to those pieces enough to satisfy my desire to be held ?

Or does it make me a feral rogue ?

Schizophrenic delusions ticking in my head…

Sometimes I wonder if it’s my fault that I’m this alone…

then again I wasn’t the one feeding myself all the insecurities as a young child.

I wasn’t the one playing pretend.

It was never my fault, my mother thought faking happiness is the way to protect me, it was never my fault father wasn’t interested in the details, as long as I was his perfect girl…

Now, I can’t hold on to anything the way i hold on to the lunatic turmoil that makes me sway and laugh on my own personal misery.

Call it history.

Hide behind defensive humor, get my inner demons drunk on caffeine, mistake that high for happiness cause mama did too…

And wait for caffeine withdrawal to wake us up, both of us…

I’ve never been hangover, but I imagine this is how it’ll feel

The aura ? The migraine?

The urge to throw myself up to be reborn clean.

•••

•Quotes: Olivia Laing/Heather Havrilesky/ Olivia Laing/ Marya Hornbacher/Anaïs Nin/Camille Norton/ Alice Oseman/ eduardo C. Corral/anne carson/ Joanne Harris/ Hannah Green/Hannah Green/Lisel Mueller

•Original context: sinligh

•Art reference:

1. Sasha Hartslief, Late Night Shower, 2021. 2. Getting Up by Vincent Giarrano. 3.illustration by Owen Gent. 4. The Lovers on the Bridge, 1991. 5. "Beverly Edmier 1967' Keith Edmier, 1998

•song recommendation:

P.s: the whole album is a masterpiece ! Give it a try, thank me later.

[perfectquote]

And yet you are all that you have, so you must be enough. There is no other way.

Marya Hornbacher, Wasted: A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia

[wrexkinghxvoc]

Benjamin Alre Saenz, Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe // Grimes, from Oblivion // Marya Hornbacher, from Wasted: A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia // Sylvia Plath, from a journal entry featured in The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath // Kaveh Akbar, from Calling a Wolf a Wolf // Euripides, from “Orestes”, An Oresteia (trans. Anne Carson)

[perfectfeelings]

And yet you are all that you have, so you must be enough. There is no other way.

Marya Hornbacher, Wasted: A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia

[defyinggod]

Marya Hornbacher, Wasted

NBC Hannibal

[quotefeeling]

And yet you are all that you have, so you must be enough. There is no other way.

Marya Hornbacher, Wasted: A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia

[entrop-y]

—marya hornbacher, wasted

SPENCER REID AND MAEVE DONNOVAN: SEASON 8 EPISODE 20, "ALCHEMY"

[perfeqt]

And yet you are all that you have, so you must be enough. There is no other way.

Marya Hornbacher, Wasted: A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia

[thoughtkick]

And yet you are all that you have, so you must be enough. There is no other way.

Marya Hornbacher, Wasted: A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia