#Madeline Bauer

[obstinaterixatrix]

Molly Bauer's first year of college is not the picture-perfect piece of art she'd always envisioned. On day one at PICA, Molly discovers that--through some horrible twist of fate--her full-ride scholarship has vanished! But the ancient texts (PICA's dusty financial aid documents) reveal a loophole. If Molly and 9 other art students win a single game of softball, they'll receive a massive athletic scholarship. Can Molly's crew of ragtag artists succeed in softball without dropping the ball?

The author of the New York Times best-selling Check, Please series, Ngozi Ukazu, returns with debut artist Madeline Rupert to bring an energetic young adult story about authenticity, old vs. new, and college failure. It also poses the question: "Is art school worth it?"

I’ve been a huge fan of sakana since forever, and I like self-contained sports stories (the heated drama is peak, but I can’t stick with something super long) so I knew I’d love this graphic novel. and I was right.

I like the ensemble! The focus is primarily on the main character, but you get the sense they’re doing their own stuff in the periphery. wrangling a bunch of art students is a really funny concept and allows for a lot of personality contrasts.

it’s not a romance, but it does have romantic elements, and the love interest-type character is SO funny. there were several scenes with her that legit got a laugh out of me

super worth it, 100% recommended for a fun time. might give ex-art school students psychic damage

[haveyoureadthismgyabook]

Series info...

Book one in the Dear America series

A Journey to the New World

The Winter of Red Snow: The Revolutionary War Diary of Abigail Jane Stewart, Valley Forge, Pennsylvania, 1777 by Kristiana Gregory

When Will This Cruel War Be Over?: The Civil War Diary of Emma Simpson, Gordonsville, Virginia, 1864 by Barry Denenberg

A Picture of Freedom: The Diary of Clotee, a Slave Girl, Belmont Plantation, Virginia, 1859 by Patricia McKissack

Across the Wide and Lonesome Prairie: The Oregon Trail Diary of Hattie Campbell, 1847 by Kristiana Gregory

So Far from Home: The Diary of Mary Driscoll, an Irish Mill Girl, Lowell, Massachusetts, 1847 by Barry Denenberg

I Thought My Soul Would Rise and Fly: The Diary of Patsy, a Freed Girl, Mars Bluff, South Carolina, 1865 by Joyce Hansen

West to a Land of Plenty: The Diary of Teresa Angelino Viscardi, New York to Idaho Territory, 1883 by Jim Murphy

Dreams in the Golden Country: The Diary of Zipporah Feldman, a Jewish Immigrant Girl, New York City, 1903 by Kathryn Lasky

Standing in the Light: The Captive Diary of Catharine Carey Logan, Delaware Valley, Pennsylvania, 1763 by Mary Pope Osborne

Voyage on the Great Titanic: The Diary of Margaret Ann Brady, RMS Titanic, 1912 by Ellen Emerson White

A Line in the Sand: The Alamo Diary of Lucinda Lawrence, Gonzales, Texas, 1836 by Sherry Garland

My Heart Is on the Ground: The Diary of Nannie Little Rose, a Sioux Girl, Carlisle Indian School, Pennsylvania, 1880 by Ann Rinaldi

The Great Railroad Race: The Diary of Libby West, Utah Territory, 1868 by Kristiana Gregory

A Light in the Storm: The Civil War Diary of Amelia Martin, Fenwick Island, Delaware, 1861 by Karen Hesse

The Girl Who Chased Away Sorrow: The Diary of Sarah Nita, a Navajo Girl, New Mexico, 1864 by Ann Turner

A Coal Miner's Bride: The Diary of Anetka Kaminska, Lattimer, Pennsylvania, 1896 by Susan Campbell Bartoletti

Color Me Dark: The Diary of Nellie Lee Love, the Great Migration North, Chicago, Illinois, 1919 by Patricia McKissack

One Eye Laughing, the Other Weeping: The Diary of Julie Weiss, Vienna, Austria to New York, 1938 by Barry Denenberg

My Secret War: The World War II Diary of Madeline Beck, Long Island, New York, 1941 by Mary Pope Osborne

Valley of the Moon: The Diary Of Maria Rosalia de Milagros, Sonoma Valley, Alta California, 1846 by Sherry Garland

Seeds of Hope: The Gold Rush Diary of Susanna Fairchild, California Territory, 1849 by Kristiana Gregory

Christmas After All: The Great Depression Diary of Minnie Swift, Indianapolis, Indiana, 1932 by Kathryn Lasky

Early Sunday Morning: The Pearl Harbor Diary of Amber Billows, Hawaii, 1941 by Barry Denenberg

My Face to the Wind: The Diary of Sarah Jane Price, a Prairie Teacher, Broken Bow, Nebraska, 1881 by Jim Murphy

Where Have All the Flowers Gone? The Diary of Molly MacKenzie Flaherty, Boston, Massachusetts, 1968 by Ellen Emerson White

A Time for Courage: The Suffragette Diary of Kathleen Bowen, Washington, D.C., 1917 by Kathryn Lasky

Mirror, Mirror on the Wall: The Diary of Bess Brennan, Perkins School for the Blind, 1932 by Barry Denenberg

Survival in the Storm: The Dust Bowl Diary of Grace Edwards, Dalhart, Texas, 1935 by Katelan Janke

When Christmas Comes Again: The World War I Diary of Simone Spencer, New York City to the Western Front, 1917 by Beth Seidel Levine

Land of the Buffalo Bones: The Diary of Mary Ann Elizabeth Rodgers, an English Girl in Minnesota, New Yeovil, Minnesota, 1873 by Marion Dane Bauer

Love Thy Neighbor: The Tory Diary of Prudence Emerson, Green Marsh, Massachusetts, 1774 by Ann Turner

All the Stars in the Sky: The Santa Fe Trail Diary of Florrie Mack Ryder, The Santa Fe Trail, 1848 by Megan McDonald

Look to the Hills: The Diary of Lozette Moreau, a French Slave Girl, New York Colony, 1763 by Patricia McKissack

I Walk in Dread: The Diary of Deliverance Trembley, Witness to the Salem Witch Trials, Massachusetts Bay Colony, 1691 by Lisa Rowe Fraustino

Hear My Sorrow: The Diary of Angela Denoto, a Shirtwaist Worker, New York City, 1909 by Deborah Hopkinson

The Fences Between Us: The Diary of Piper Davis, Seattle, Washington, 1941 by Kirby Larson

Like the Willow Tree: The Diary of Lydia Amelia Pierce, Portland, Maine, 1918 by Lois Lowry

Cannons at Dawn: The Second Diary of Abigail Jane Stewart, Valley Forge, Pennsylvania, 1779 by Kristiana Gregory

With the Might of Angels: The Diary of Dawnie Rae Johnson, Hadley, Virginia, 1954 by Andrea Davis Pinkney

Behind the Masks: The Diary of Angeline Reddy, Bodie, California, 1880 by Susan Patron

A City Tossed and Broken: The Diary of Minnie Bonner, San Francisco, California, 1906 by Judy Blundell

Down the Rabbit Hole: The Diary of Pringle Rose, Chicago, Illinois, 1871 by Susan Campbell Bartoletti

[sachisei]

10 Facts About Myself

I used to be a huge fan of ROTBTD or The Big Four. Not The Big Five. That's actually what got me to start a Tumblr blog, but my old account is long gone.

The most common gifts I received since childhood were rulers, sketchbooks, and clothes. Especially clothes...

I don't have a best or greatest friend. It seems unfair for me to pick one. And I refuse favoritism.

I don't like to celebrate my own birthday. It's just too... mmm... over-the-top to celebrate. I also don't want people to spend for me just for that reason. And, the birthday song sounds super awkward when everybody sings. Yeah, I'd skip it.

A movie that made a huge impression on me is The Devil Wears Prada. I first watched this on a Christmas night with my cousins and our fam. I love Meryl Streep's character in that movie. So much depth, so much development. The ending was perfect. I don't know if it stayed true to the novel; regardless I love it, and I will also read the book when I get my hands on it.

Some modern books I love to death are The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller and Rubbernecker by Belinda Bauer. The Song of Achilles made me bawl my eyes out for a few good nights, and Rubbernecker tickled me during bus rides.

I am sort of a Jack-of-all-trades. I get hyped up and learn about one thing, never master it, get bored and find another thing to hype about. This is why I have multiple hobbies and interests. I can't just pick one and stick to just that.

I once considered if I want to apply for NASA. You know, to become an astronaut. I mean... ISN'T THAT FCKING AWESOME. You get blasted to space! You get to see the pitch-black galaxy and the stars. YOU GET TO BE IN ZERO GRAVITY. Bro.

Uhh, what else... I can ride a horse. Pfsh.

I cut the tags of some pieces of clothing because they bother me.

[gameangliaindustrybriefyr2]

5 Video Games that focus on Mental Illness:

1.We Happy Few: This game uses mental health to focus on people's mental instability and explores how this is caused. It uses it's eerie and lifeless characters and portrays them as though they are mind controlled and clouded by insanity. This is caused by Mind-altering drugs which make them see the bright side of things hiding the dark truth that lay behind this world.

One key thing used to support this theme was the Narrative. In an interview with the lead writer Alex Epstein, this is what he had to say about how the narrative almost twists peoples judgments.

He said: “This is not a game about the government being bad,” Epstein said. “This is a game where it’s your neighbours who will do you in, because everybody, every proper decent welly, wants to participate in suppressing the truth because they all are very uncomfortable with the past. If you start talking about the past, it’s going to freak them out and they’re not going to be able to pretend that they forgot it and they’re going to have to deal with it. They will come after you with cricket bats to make you take your drugs. This is not the government doing that. That’s your neighbour is doing that. It’s peer pressure. It’s almost scarier."

This could correspond to how certain people take drugs as they see it as an escape from the real world even though its just a temporary fix to permanent mental health damage.

2.Child Of Light: This Game uses the story to project real life situations into creating a fantasy world. The main character goes through their mother passing away and then falls asleep into this dream where she has to learn to love, adapt to and accept her new life by battling grief head on. This corresponds to people having struggles with mental health and learning to try and move on from terrible events that have occurred in their past. The main lesson that this game teaches is that no matter what life through at you, you need to learn to stand up and confront it in order to beat it.

One thing I thought made this style of game stand out was the fairy tale style artwork design. In an interview with the lead director of this game Patrick Plourde, he stated that he was drawn to the 19th century style artwork from story books.

PP: "John Bauer, Arthur Rackham, Edmund Dulac and Kay Nielsen were all major influences. Yoshitaka Amano’s Fairies book was really important for me in getting interested in fairy tales and finally the various watercolour sketches made by Hayao Miyazaki for his movies."

3.Celeste: This game focuses on the character of Madeline who suffers from really bad anxiety issues and self doubt. In order to beat these mental health struggles, she decides to climb the Celeste Mountain. This game can have a lot of meanings in which people can hit their own fictional mountain from feelings of anxiety and doubt as well as other emotions such as depression. They simply have to conquer their own mountain of struggles and cheat these emotions away. Madeline also has another version of herself who mocks her throughout the game to try and knock her confidence. This represents what some people have inside their heads. A little devil that tries to knock you down at any sign of weakness.

When finding interviews, I found Maddy Thorn who wrote the story for this game. She had a lot of doubts when helping to start this game because she came out as transgender. She described this situation by saying “It's flattering and it's scary,” “It can be paralyzing — this feeling that I need to be a paragon of perfect representation, or that anything we make will be primarily seen through that lens. I'm forever conflicted because I love attention and I love being a part of the conversation around my work. But there needs to be boundaries because it's easy to lose myself. I'm not perfect and I can't handle maintaining that visibility for too long.”

I thought she represented the character of celeste very well also making them a lot like herself. This can also relate to having anxiety and self doubt.

4.Limbo: This game focuses on the setting. This game looks at a quiet, empty and dark world with a small boy travelling across this darkness to reach the one they love. This focuses on the mental health themes of grief and depression and how it feels to lose someone that you love. How it feels to have no escape from this grief/depression with the only direction being to move inward. This game is powerful in that sense that falling into this world in your head is cruel and violent and you feel as though it were hopeless to speak out against it or that you didn't have a voice. However, there is always light at the end of the tunnel you just have to keep going and pick yourself up.

Apart from the obvious setting of this game being dark and pointless, I was impressed by the audio for this game and wanted to do more research into it. I found an interview with Martin Stig Andersen who designed all the audio and sounds. Two examples of what he designed was the use of electricity noises while in the presence of a ruined neon "HOTEL" sign, and silencing the wind sound when the spider approached the boy in the forest. He was asked what aspect he was most proud and this was his answer: "I am really proud of how we were able to create a completely unified sound environment, where elements take on the role of both music and sound design at the same time. There is no separate music track per se in LIMBO, which means players won’t be able to alter the mix between “sound effects” and “background music”. It will be more like a movie experience, where you aren’t able to alter the mix of a film. Game players may not be used to this approach, but it works extremely well in LIMBO and is exactly what we were aiming for."

5.Wandersong: This game focuses on a character portraying a Bard who is in the middle of a huge conflict trying to adapt to this new world he is living in by singing and connecting with different people. This relates to real mental health because it focuses on real life war that go on in the world where you feel hopeless to what is to come. The only way that people can try to pick themselves back up is to adapt to new things and try to connect with other people because you aren't alone. There are others who feel the same and need to connect. This game also focuses on that fact that no matter how much darkness there is in the world there is always hope and happiness somewhere.

[k12academics]

Five St. Cecilia Academy students earned the 2023 CLT10 Regional Scholar Award, with one being named a Distinguished Scholar.

Regional Scholars: Scores within the top 5%of their geographic region

Grace Bauer '26, (St. Henry School)

Saba Michael '26 (St. Edwards School)

Madeline Nientemp '26 (Christ the King School)

Jayma Lindsley '25 (St. Bernard Academy)

Colsyn Whittaker '25 (Rose Park Middle School) – Also named Distinguished Scholar, Highest score at SCA

[hagatha-christie]

Not really using Tumblr anymore and also no one reads these, but I like doing them, so here are my November and December reads

The bad:

Bloom by Kevin Panetta and Savanna Ganucheau: not bad so much as it’s boring. Did not care about any of the characters and tbh couldn’t tell you a thing that happened.

The fine: If This Gets Out by Cale Dietrich and Sophie Gonzalez: look there’s a lot of really great material in this book but because it only focuses on 2 of the 4 members of this boy band we miss out on like half of the stuff brought up in this book. Also I’d love it if we learned to correctly describe a book because they way people talked about it I genuinely thought it’d be a cute romance between 2 members of said boy band and like...one of the characters has a drug-induced psychotic break so it is very much not a cute romance.

Romancing Mister Bridgerton by Julia Quinn: I finally watched Bridgerton so my sister shoved this into my hands and I knocked it out in like a day. Penelope’s storyline was Colin realizing there was more to her because she’s smarter and funnier than she lets on and Penelope’s storyline was realizing there was more to Colin because he...has...anger issues? Idk. There was a scene where I thought he was gonna hit her but it didn’t happen thankfully. Anyway, Kinda toxic.

Secret Service by Tal Bauer: OK FINE. This is the author of those other two terrible romances I read. This one was by far the best of the three I’ve read. Anyway it’s basically a very good season of Scandal (forbidden gay romance between the president and his head of Secret Service detail! Political intrigue! Betrayal!) Also, it didn’t end in a throuple and i was shocked and upset.

The good/great:

The Secret Life of Albert Entwhistle by Matt Cain: checks all my boxes - unlikely friendships. Coming of age but it’s an older person. Reconnecting with people from your past. Healing the trauma of your childhood. Very, very sweet.

The Witch’s Heart by Genevieve Gornichec: made me want to delve deeper into Norse mythology. Like Circe by Madeline Miller, if Circe was more plot heavy.

Kings of the Wyld by Nicholas Eames: this is kind of a dad book but it’s fun. Set in a fantasy world where mercenary bands are treated similarly to how we treat rock stars. It’s a classing “getting the band back together” storyline with more character development I thought we’d get. Some characters are more fully realized than others and it definitely has flaws but it was still extremely entertaining.

Hell Followed With Us by Andrew Joseph White: an extremely disturbing YA post apocalyptic about a trans boy who escapes a religious ecoterrorist cult. Lots of body horror and Religious Trauma which I think is done really well in the narration. Also love that he finds shelter with a group of teens from the city’s LGBTQ shelter and there’s like...a lot of disagreements and fighting between them which I feel like you never see.

The Honeys by Ryan La Sala: like Jennifer’s Body meets Invasion of the Body Snatchers meets Heathers (just a little) meets But I’m a Cheerleader (just a little). Surreal and twisty and very, very fun. I read this in an afternoon and had a great time. It’s about a kid whose twin sister escapes from the fancy summer camp she’s been attending without him and breaks into his room in an attempt to kill him and ends up dying herself, and he wants to investigate.

[watching-pictures-move]

Put On Your Raincoats #17 | The Erotic Reveries of Rinse Dream

Cafe Flesh opens with a title card orienting us to its post-apocalyptic setting. After a calamitous apocalyptic event known as the "Nuclear Kiss", the world is made up of 99% "Sex Negatives", and 1% "Sex Positives". The Sex Negatives can't have sex and can only watch. The Sex Positives escaped such a fate, but are instead forced to perform for an audience of Positives for their vicarious enjoyment. There are many such venues but the one we spend the movie in is the Cafe Flesh of the title, a nightclub where the decor and patronage evoke a cross between punk rock and retro-futurist aesthetics and a hint of Rat Pack era cool. A smarmy comedian in a white tuxedo introduces the sex acts, which are elaborately staged performances that play almost as genre parody with their tongue-in-cheek choreography (plenty of costumed grinding, as with a performer in a rat costume early on, and mimed thrusting, as with another performer in a pencil costume in a later scene) until the turn into the real thing with the requisite close-ups. Futuristic jazz reminiscent of Angelo Badalamenti's music plays over the proceedings.

This serves as the background to a story about a woman who may or may not secretly be a Positive (played by scream queen Michelle Bauer and, in certain scenes, a body double) and the impending arrival of a legendary Positive performer known for his virility (a towering, square-jawed Kevin James, introduced in black sunglasses and an oversized blue suit). We also get a sense of the tensions in this nightclub ecosystem, particularly between the heroine and her boyfriend, a new performer, the comedian, the owner (who puts the comedian in his place in one scene by having him cruelly recite "the rhyme"). (The comedian is played by Andy Nichols and the owner by Tantala Ray, both of whom played interview subjects in Gregory Dark's Devil in Miss Jones two-parter, which leads me to believe the latter was influenced by this movie, as Nichols in particular doesn't have many screen credits.)

This movie apparently was a bit of a success in the midnight movie circuit, and it's not hard to see why, based on the strength of the mise en scene and the performances. The cool, smoky backgrounds of the reaction shots provide a nice counterpoint to the avant garde looking performances and give the highly stylized setting a nice evocative quality. There's also a level of genre commentary here, as the story ultimately is about the heroine's agency over her pleasure and the roles sex performers are forced into by greater society, ultimately imprisoned by their own abilities. Truth be told I found the performances got a little less enjoyable when they got down to business with the penetration and whatnot (it gets harder to pull off inspired choreography when one of your appendages is stuck in another person, or vice versa), but I also think it's necessary for those themes to resonate.

Cafe Flesh was directed by Stephen Sayadian, credited as Rinse Dream, and he'd previously used that pseudonym on Nightdreams, for which he co-wrote the screenplay. (The director was Francis Delia, who went on to a career of directing mostly music videos and television, while the other writer was Jerry Stahl, known for his memoir Permanent Midnight, as well as writing for shows such as ALF and movies such as Bad Boys II.) This movie similarly concerns agency over female pleasure and is about two doctors (Andy Nichols and Jennifer West) conducting experiments on a mentally ill young woman by inducing erotic dreams and monitoring her brainwaves. There's a dream involving a giant, monstrous jack-in-the-box. There's one with a pair of cowgirls and something other than a gun stored in a holster, with the cowgirls spouting stilted dialogues in robotic monotones, a Sayadian trademark of sorts. Wall of Voodoo's cover of "Ring of Fire" plays over the action (I'm not sure if they paid for the rights, but Delia and Sayadian did direct videos for the band). There's one with a group of bedouins sharing a hookah and then her. There's a giallo-esque scene involving a masked assailant, but this happens after an aborted nightmare about a shrieking man with a hollow chest from his pants emerges a shrivelled up, monstrous baby. Did David Lynch jack off to this? I wouldn't rule it out, folks.

There's a scene where she blows an anthropomorphic box of Cream of Wheat, while a jaunty cover of "Old Man River" plays on the soundtrack and a man dressed as giant piece of toast dances and plays saxopohone. An IMDb user review cites this scene for its cutting racial commentary, but I found this tonally jarring with the rest of the movie. After this, there's a trip to hell where a demon and his minions subject her to such horrific tortures as prodding her with a giant claw and then an even more fearsome double-pronged contraption. The scientists argue over fears that they gave her too much stimulation. ("This woman's on the brink of an orgasm. Let her enjoy it. She doesn't need interruption from a man." "You call it orgasm. I call it breakdown.") The movie then makes way to its final set piece, involving fog, a background of blue sky and pillars and soft piano music. The cinematography in this scene is in stark contrast to the mostly shadowy, intimate imagery of the previous scenes, with the camera pulled up to admire both their bodies and the scene continuing for some time after the climax. It almost brings to mind a certain scene in Jerry Lewis' The Ladies Man that I found disarming in its stylistic and tonal break from the rest of the movie. Without revealing too much, the film's coda sets the record straight.

It probably doesn't say anything flattering about me that I found most of this pretty hot. The movie has a tinge of horror running through it, giving many of the sex scenes (especially the one in hell) a real tension, while the scientific framing device gives it a cold, calculating quality reminiscent of David Cronenberg. (Alas, this doesn't predate some of his most influential films, but for all we know, David Cronenberg jacked off to it as well.) A few of the character names (Mrs. Van Houten, Mrs. Chalmers) make me suspect that Matt Groening might have seen (and jacked off to) it as well. This is pure speculation on my part, but as far as I'm aware, none of them have denied it either. The movie's distinct tone is grounded in an impressive lead performance by Dorothy LeMay. I wasn't all too impressed with her work in Taboo II, but here I think she skillfully evokes the heroine's derangement and "erotic trauma", in the words of the scientists.

Sayadian and Stahl collaborated again for Dr. Caligari, a relatively mainstream effort that also found some success as a midnight movie. I say "relatively" because it's still pretty fucking weird. The movie positions itself as a loose sequel to Robert Wiene's classic The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari, this time about the granddaughter of the original Caligari conducting illegal experiments in an insane asylum. From the earlier film it pulls a German expressionist influence, but combines it with a campy, MTV-inflected style to present the asylum as a warped funhouse. The dimensions of the architecture are distorted and full of odd angles, decorated in a mixture of pitch black and gaudy day-glo colours (lots of yellow and pink costumes). This is not a pornographic movie, yet it's hardly less obsessed with sex, as the villain's plan concerns the weaponization of female pleasure. There's also the occasional grotesque sexually-charged image to spice things up, like the sight of a woman with giant, phallic-shaped breasts. Some of the imagery also gives it potency as horror, like an oozing sore or a cake full of intestines. There's a lot of strange, stilted dialogue, as in this exchange:

"Describe your life in three words or less."

"Un-ending torment."

"Elaborate, please."

"Blankety blank blank."

"Thank you for being specific."

This is matched by the angular body language of the villain, played by Madeline Reynal in a deadpan yet very physical performance. This movie also brings into focus a voyeuristic theme, which was present in those earlier movies but didn't seem quite as confrontational in its presentation. A character utters, basically to the audience: "I know you're watching me. I feel your eyes like wet fingers touching me in special places." (This is a line of dialogue that appeared in the next few films I'll talk about.) Truth be told, I was a little exhausted by the sensory overload of Sayadian's style here, and in retrospect appreciate the way the sex scenes act as a counterpoint to his more aggressive tendencies in his more explicit films. But at the same time, this is full of memorable imagery and has a weirdly compelling lead performance. I don't know if there's much else quite like it (or at least operating at this force), so it gets a recommendation.

Sayadian followed up Nightdreams with a few shot-on-video sequels. I skipped Nightdreams 2 as I could only find it in a heavily degraded transfer, but I did make time for Nightdreams 3, which has a self contained story that's essentially a more explicit if relaxed version of Dr. Caligari, once again concerning a doctor conducting sinister experiments at an insane asylum. (This time her experiments mostly involve just fucking her patients and other staff.) There's more of the stilted dialogue, even closer to non sequiturs than they were in the earlier film, with the music by Double Vision providing an off-kilter soundscape to match the weirdness of the dialogue. (Highlights include "My pussy's like an erotic assassin" and "I happen to know she has a thing for longshoremen. Just mention On the Waterfront and she gets randy pants.") The video imagery quite frankly is pretty ugly, with the green carpet and purple drapes that decorate the set looking especially ungainly, yet Sayadian seems aware of this, as when he uses video's flattening effect to create a crude facsimile of a split diopter shot. The video collage style he adopts meshes uneasily with the plot, as if to call out its meaninglessness, giving the whole thing a slight MST3K vibe, especially as characters speak directly to the camera.

Some of these tendencies are honed to a more pleasing form in the two-part Party Doll A Go-Go!, where we spend time with a number of attractive, shapely women in bright coloured lingerie as they spout '60s-inspired dialogue at the viewer in between scenes of copulation. (Not all the dialogue is '60s-tinged, however: "They're overcome with retro wordplay...Us modern girls prefer synthetic future".) Like many pornographic films, this is a collection of loosely related sex scenes, but Sayadian's construction turns those genre requirements into parody, having his characters offer colour commentary (albeit channeled through his campy prose) on their own scenes and even getting interrupted by the stars of subsequent and preceding scenes. The number of quotable lines is even greater than those earlier films, and I admit I was scrambling to write down the choicest ones as there were so many. The best lines go to Jeanna Fine, who also has the huskiest voice and the most penetrating stare, so she was easily my favourite. I certainly was not unmoved when she insisted that she's "never run around buck naked and bubbling for man-winky" or "never wrapped[her] lips around a throbbing johnny". (She does not, however, deny having ever interacted with beef bologna.) Or when she asked the audience "Was I a bad girl?" (said three times in rapid succession) or if we've "ever seen a double orgasm on videotape?" (She adds "Watch, pornhound" and "Calling all porndogs, watch me work, uh-huh.") And I definitely wasn't unmoved when she demonstrated her talents on a dildo dangled in front of her (which she refers to as an "artificial man-thing", a "chubby rubber fella" and a "flying princeton"). No, definitely not unmoved.

There isn't much of plot here, except in the latter half when one of the girls can't stop "the wiggle" and needs to be rescued with an emergency injection of "boy jerky". Sayadian, once again bringing voyeuristic concerns into focus (the characters all talk to the camera), seems to be satirizing the very idea of porn having premises and certain their lazy execution. Even the production design is transparent in its chintz (the movie is shot entirely on the same set, with the bare minimum in alterations to the set dressing to make it look even slightly different), while the video images, which feature lots of Dutch angles, zooms and whip pans, match the campiness of the whole affair. This is probably a little long at a combined 2+ hours, but at the same time, it settles into a nice groove and is full of really attractive and reasonably charismatic actresses delivering amusing dialogue and indulging in "girl homo" (sometimes "big time girl homo") or getting "boy jerky". I don't have much interest in delving into '90s pornography and shot-on-video productions strain the dignity one can feel while trying to watch pornographic films as actual movies, but I'm not gonna pretend I didn't have a good time with this.

[perfectdisastcr]

💗 i would like a list of all 3 million potential pairings please 🙈

my god, i would love to take the time out of my day to give that to you, and just know that we can ship literally anybody and everybody because that’s all we ever do in the first place and you know how much i love doing that with you too. my favorite writing partner everybody, bre is hands down the best partner in the whole world, and i’m lucky enough to be able to have her at all. she’s mine and i’m never going to let her go because i love her so much! she’s literally the best thing to ever happen to me and i know i wouldn’t be here through the shitty times and all without her! everybody better go follow her right now and send her all the love i swear to god, because she’s the only person on this hell site that shows me the attention that i deserve! also that list of potential pairings is below the cut, and don’t say i didn’t warn you. 👀

send 💗 if you’re open to the possibility of a romantic ship eventually happening between our muses

all these characters are up for shipping with all your characters:

alex gardiner (paul rudd) alexander hamilton (lin-manuel miranda) alex mullner (brant daughterty) alice liddell (madelyn cline) alisha khara (jameela jamil) annie abel (luna blaise/anya chalotra) antonia moreno (victoria justice) apollonia levine (anastasia karanikolaou) arthur pendragon (niall horan) ashley spinelli (ursula corbero) aspen rhodes (sofia black-d'elia) astrid porter (karlie kloss) audrey ramirez (selena gomez) august khalil (rami malek) axel turner (charlie weber/skeet ulrich) aziz hassan (riz ahmed) bailee rose (jenny boyd) bambi prince (lachlan watson) barbie roberts (kate upton) barley lightfoot (michael clifford) beatriz velasco (camila cabello/diane guerrero)  beau hester (froy gutierrez) beck collins (joe keery) bellatrix lestrange (carmela zumbado) belle dubois (margaret qualley) belle summers (candice king) berliouz bonfamille (alex fitzalan) bernard davenport (gavin leatherwood) billie groves (kiana lede/emmy raver-lampman) billy hargrove (dacre montgomery) bindi culver (meg donnelly/rachel mcadams) bo-peep ‘bo’ patterson (amanda seyfried) brady gardiner (nathaniel buzolic) brielle stewart (alexandra daddario) bronwyn pierson (madelaine petsch) buzz lightyear (paul mescal/chris pine) calliope jung (phillipa soo) camille aguilar (jeanine mason) carl fredricksen (tye sheridan) celeste quintana (rosalia/maite perroni) chandler armstrong (iwan rheon) cinderella tremaine (lily james) clementine ahn (jamie chung) cliff egan (stephen amell) colleen lowell (jodie comer) connor catrell (thomas doherty) copper slade (nick jonas) cordelia goodwin (ryan destiny/candice patton) coriander thompson (dacre montgomery/chris evans) cornelius robinson (simon baker) cruella de vil (melanie martinez) cyrus quinney (owen joyner) daisy vaughn (isabella gomez/aimee carrero) dakota atkins (amber midthunder) dale monks (keiynan lonsdale) dalton davis (harris dickinson) daniela ‘dani’ costello (becky g/eva longoria) dash parr (jaden smith) delilah diaz (camila cabello/diane guerrero) delphine washington (antonia thomas) delta montgomery (manu gavassi) denver koch (thomas elms) devon montgomery (iain de caestecker) diego hargreeves (david castaneda) dorcas meadowes (ariela barer) dory blau (julia louise-dreyfus) duke blaise (ashley graham & matthew daddario — reincarnated)  duncan traeger (zac efron) edmund whittaker (richard madden) edwin orwell (nicholas galitzine) elena flores (jenna ortega) eleonora moretti (benedetta gargari) eleven (millie bobby brown) elio montgomery (noah schnapp/brendon urie) elisabeth ‘elsa’ andersson (candice king) elliott murdoch (kj apa) eloise thompson (taylor hill/zoey deutch) elwood leith (sam claflin) emerson wheaton (beau mirchoff) emily sondheim (eve fraser) emmy silverstein (nat wolff/michiel huisman) ericka ‘ricki’ santos (danna paola) esmeralda guybertaut (priyanka chopra) everest sorenson (adam driver) ezekiel ‘zeke’ bauer (neels visser) fa mulan (awkwafina) felix dawson (lukas gage) ferris rockwell (joshua bassett) five hargreeves (aidan gallagher/rob raco/john mulaney) florence prata (barbie ferreira) flynn rider (jacob elordi/steven r mcqueen) frank castle (jon bernthal) gabrielle dupres (louriza tronco) genevieve rizzo (troian bellisario) gill moorish (harrison ford) godwin vivar (diego boneta) grainger anslow (justin hartley) grant wesley (keanu reeves) griffin price (liam hemsworth) guinevere ‘gwen’ flores (ester exposito/ana de armas) gulliver kennedy (robert sheehan) gunner mccoy (miles heizer) halston krogen (nick robinson) hamish duke (thomas elms) harper graves (sydney sweeney) harry potter (alberto rosende) harvey wolff (joaquin phoenix) hawke bradbury (brenton thwaites) helen parr (megan thee stallion/kerry washington) hendrix palmer (mark fischbach) henley howell (dylan everett/paul wesley) henrik nilsen (herman tommeraas/chris evans) hercules sabri (aubrey joseph) hermione granger (quintessa swindell) holden krogen (jack falahee) holly la stella (olivia holt) honey lemon (irene ferreiro) hudson reid (jaeden lieberher/paul mescal/james mcavoy) irving reid (matty healy) isobel evans (lily cowles) jacoba ‘cobi’ abernathy (geraldine viswanathan) jake bennett (joe jonas) jake breckenridge (landon liboiron) james potter (noah centineo) james ‘sully’ sullivan (hozier) jane porter (zoe sugg) jasmine agrabah (naomi scott) jessica jones (krysten ritter) jim hopper (david harbour) johanna ‘jo’ gardiner (carlson young) josefine olive (lili reinhart/maika monroe) joseph ‘joey’ carnegie (chris o'dowd) juliette russo (camila mendes) juno nicks (gideon adlon/linda cardellini) justin miller (michael b. jordan) keaton green (charlie plummer/austin butler/alexander skarsgard) keifer fry (nathan parsons) kennedy sutherland (florence pugh) khalid farid (mena massoud) kiernan jost (jack barakat) kiki penn (natalie alyn lind)  kim possible (karen gillan) kit dempsey (aaron taylor-johnson/michael sheen) kristoff bjorgman (ben hardy) kuzco inca (tommy martinez) lady alvarez (camila cabello/diane guerrero) lake montgomery (jace norman/casey deidrick/jeff goldblum) lazarus (sean teale/tom ellis) lennox wells (billie piper) leonardo ‘leo’ light (armie hammer) levi wesley (gerard butler) liam wheaton (lucas lynngaard tonnesen/dominic sherwood) lilac montgomery (sophia lillis/deborah ann woll) lila pitts (ritu arya) lilo pelekai (courtney eaton) lola carver (carla gugino) macy merritt (kylie jenner) madeline hawkins (rowan blanchard/kaylee bryant) madison bloomfield (gwyneth paltrow) maggie wheaton (virginia gardner) maria deluca (heather hemmens) mariana de la cruz (victoria justice/salma hayek) marianne darden (elizabeth olsen) marisol torres (alexa demie/salma hayek) marlene phan (brianne tju) matilda franks (brooke markham) matthew murdock (charlie cox) max tian (chloe bennet) mckenzie whitman (danielle rose russell) megara creon (ashley moore) melanie carter (brenna d'amico/zooey deschanel) melody burns-newman (camren bicondova) mercutio bellini (giancarlo commare) merida dunbroch (bree kish) michael ‘goob’ yagoobian (dylan o’brien/andrew scott) mickey hader (shawn mendes) miguel rivera (diego tinoco) mike wheeler (finn wolfhard) mildred ‘millie’ brantwood (stella maeve) milo martinez (itzan escamilla/tyler posey) milo thatch (jason ralph) minerva ‘minnie’ winslett (jenna coleman) mischa locklear (jenny slate) moana motunui (auli'i cravalho) molly wheaton (saoirse monica jackson/kristen bell/kristin chenoweth) monet bugg (annie murphy) mordecai ‘cai’ baird (joseph morgan) murray bauman (brett gelman) nadja (natasia demetriou) naomi phillips (hunter king) natalie fuller (krysten ritter) nate gardiner (tom holland/thomas hayes/joe keery/adam scott) nemo fisher (nick robinson) nick novak (jon bernthal) nick wilde (jake johnson) nina baxter (laura harrier) nolan van ness (louis hynes/benjamin wadsworth) nymphadora tonks (kennedy walsh) odessa barnes (inanna sarkis) osbourne russo (oliver jackson-cohen) otis richardson (finn jones) owen monroe (zachary levi) paloma katz (brittany o'grady) paxton gardiner (douglas booth) pearl turner (maia mitchell/aubrey plaza) penny proud (sarah jeffery) perdita ryan (alisha boe/zoe kravitz) perrie wheaton (ariela barer/jessica alba) peter pan (rudy pankow) peter pettigrew (alex lawther) phil mcdermot (leo howard/dylan o’brien) phineas flynn-fletcher (michael provost) piper donahue (millie bobby brown/katherine langford/felicity jones) pippa mei (amy okuda) pollux isola (camila mendes) portia sadler (hayden panettiere) prairie gallagher (lucy boynton) quaid ‘q’ wright (jake gylenhaal) quinton saunders (jamie dornan) rain montgomery (nick jonas) ramona montgomery-wallis (lana condor/ashley park) reed knightley (arthur darvill) reign fentworth (madison bailey/vanessa morgan) reno thames (joshua bassett) richie tozier (finn wolfhard/bill hader) river montgomery (jack griffo/tyler blackburn) robin buckley (maya hawke) roger holtz (ben platt) roger radcliffe (aaron tveit) romy reyes (carmela zumbado) ronald ‘mac’ mcdonald (rob mcelhenney) roosevelt banks (spence moore II) rowan burke (andy biersack) roxanne sutton (lady gaga) rush mccoy (cody fern) russell montgomery (ian harding/hugh jackman) russell montgomery II (jack dylan grazer/timothee chalamet/adam brody) sable rosales (catherine bascoy) saint fentworth (reece king) sally finklestein (marina ruy barbosa) salvador ‘sal’ mendoza (jorge blanco) samson gardiner (cole sprouse) sandy diamandis (christina hendricks) sawyer bell (penn badgley) seamus kennedy (aria shanghasemi/michael sheen) seb seif (zeeko zaki) selena hada (camila cabello/diane guerrero) severus snape (rob raco) shawn taggart (ben barnes) shay strauss (chris wood) shia zoheir (rami malek) shiloh young (devery jacobs) shiri madani (inbar lavi) simba king (john boyega) sloane shapiro (diana silvers/linda cardellini) sofia ramirez (camila cabello/camila mendes/morena baccarin/fluvia lacerda) stefani vidal (louriza tronco) stella romero (adria arjona) steve harrington (joe keery) stevie wagner (anne hathaway/jennifer garner) sutton reiser (katherine langford/kat dennings) tandy hawthorne (giorgia whigham) tanner cohen (ross lynch) tarrant ‘mad hatter’ hightopp (hale appleman) tarryn fischer (giorgia whigham/perry mattfeld) tatum barton (ben schwartz) teddy flood (james marsden) tex navarro (bad bunny) thad abraham (dylan sprouse/chris evans) the handler (kate walsh) thomas gardiner (felix mallard/paul rudd) tierney kennedy (maisie williams) timothy ‘tigger’ trigger (jeremy allen white) tinker bell (sabrina carpenter) tj lieberman (armie hammer) tommy burns (will poulter) topher larkin (alexander hogh andersen) trey turner (jonathan daviss) ursula celia (normani/lizzo) vaughn abel (max greenfield) veronica lodge (camila mendes) vidia viento (emma dumont) vivica lang (madison pettis/tessa thompson) wanda cowell (brenda song) warren wentz (robert pattinson) wendell langston (link neal) wilbur robinson (david mazouz) winnie knox (sophie turner/jessica chastain) wren green (alexander calvert) wynona winstead (sarah hyland/cristin milioti) xander talbot (g-eazy) york pemberton (heather baron-gracie) yusef barlas (zayn malik) zack abrams (alex fitzalan) ziggy (taron egerton) zoey matthews (olivia munn)

[koleiedoscope]

all the books i’ve read this year

-circe by madeline miller

-you can only yell at me for one thing at a time: rules for couples by roz chast and patricia marx

-the bell jar by sylvia plath

-eat my heart out by zoe pilger

-lavinia by ursula k. le guin

-the testaments by margaret atwood

-the ash family by molly dektar

-moral disorder by margaret atwood

-love’s executioner by irvin d. yalom

-my year of rest and relaxation by ottessa moshfegh

-the house of the spirits by isabel allende

-love in the time of cholera by gabriel garcia marquez

-unaccustomed earth by jhumpa lahiri

-the language of flowers by vanessa diffenbaugh

-just kids by patti smith

-family furnishings by alice munro

-paradise park by allegra goodman

-like water for chocolate by laura esquirel

-sirens of titan by kurt vonnegut

-good bones and simple murders by margaret atwood

-hope was here by joan bauer

-sex and death edited by sarah hall and peter hobbs

-bird by bird by anne lamott

-it chooses you by miranda july

-wise blood by flannery o’connor

-we never asked for wings by vanessa diffenbaugh

-the beggar maid by alice munro

-the japanese lover by isabel allende

-no evil star by anne sexton

-to bedlam and part way back by anne sexton

-all my pretty ones by anne sexton

-live or die by anne sexton

-watching you without me by lynn coady

-the goldfinch by donna tartt

-the robber bride by margaret atwood

-the stone diaries by carol shields

-the lives of girls and women by alice munro

-a little life by hanya yanagihara

-too much happiness by alice munro

-saints of big harbor by lynn coady

-delta of venus: erotica by anaïs nin

-life before man by margaret atwood

-walking to martha’s vineyard by franz wright

-the secret history by donna tartt

-the song of achilles by madeline miller

-fresh water for flowers by valérie perrin

-operating instructions: a journal of my son’s first year by anne lamott

-i love dick by chris kraus

𓆏𓆉𓆈𓆨𓆜𓆌

[sidykittycat]

M/M Book Recs

At the suggestion of @xxjinchuurikixx I’m putting together a list of published M/M books as they can be sometimes hard to find. 

All for the Game by Nora Sakavic - A series

A wonderful series starring one tough runaway, a smol angry boy and some badass teammates who all have sketchy pasts playing a made up sport that you’ll get really invested in. Oh and the yakuza is involved as well. 

Latakia by JF Smith

Our lead Matt gets mistaken for another person while over-seas and ends up being rescued by a special forces team. They get off to a rough start (one in particular, Pete favors insults as his form as affection but becomes Matt’s ride or die guy later on). It’s a really good read with a nice focus on brotherhood and how first impressions and stereotypes don’t always hold true. 

The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller

A wonderfully sweet and sad book based off the stories Achilles and his boo Patroclus. It made me laugh, it made me cry, and despite my hatred of second pov I still loved this book. 

For Real by Alexis Hall

This was one steamy read. It’s second pov which I’ve mentioned before is my least favorite but I took a chance on this one and boy am I glad I did. We start off with Laurie is close to 40 and has been around the BDSM community for a long time and is getting tired of it. Enter Toby, nineteen and just starting out in the community but he knows what he wants. I really enjoyed this books take on BDSM. There was a stronger focus on submission than there was masochism which isn’t as common in the published books that I’ve found. They also showed a dom dropped which I had never seen depicted in published work before. 

The Ghost Wore Yellow Socks by Josh Lanyon - a series 

A cute little who dun it series. Perry Foster returns from a romantic weekend gone wrong and finds a dead body - wearing yellow socks - in his bathtub. In the time that it takes for Perry to run to his neighbors for help the body is missing. Enter one of his neighbors, retired Navy SEAL Nick Reno. While skeptical of Perry’s claims at first after looking at the scene after the police he notices some things have been moved and cleaned up. What follows is the two of them trying  to figure out what happened. 

Enemies of the State by Tal Bauer

Newly elected president Jack Spiers has had a difficult time starting off. Between the terrorist attacks across Europe, tensions with Russia, and the Middle East, Jack is dealing with a lot. 

Secret Service Agent Ethan Reichenbach has recently been promoted to the lead in the president's personal security. After having protected three presidents in the last twelve years he’s not expecting much from meeting Jack. Despite his low expectations he and Jack begin to develop a friendship - something that the Secret Service has strict rules against. For their relationship to grow into something more well, that’s just not possible. After all he’s straight and is a widower, still mourning his wife who died while on duty in the military.  Ethan has long since sworn off falling for straight men but there’s just something about Jack...and maybe Jack isn’t as straight as he thought. 

Whilst Jack and Ethan are figuring out what they are to each other there a rogue black ops team has the president in their sightlines. 

Infected: Prey by Andrea Speed - a series

In a world with a sexually transmitted virus that turns people into werecats exists Roan is a born werecat and a private detective. 

It’s a really good series and it takes a nice realistic look at how weres may be treated if they truly existed. They turn against their well based off the cycle of their infection and every time they transform they have no control of themselves. With a painful transformation the longer bigger cat they transform into the shorter life span thay have. 

In the Company of Shadows Series by Ais and Santino

It’s a really well done and very long series that took the authors around 10 years to write. It’s on the darker side but it’s also very good. It stars Boyd and Sin who are agents of an agency that’s only known as The Agency. Sin is the best agent they have but is held captive by them and forced into working for them. Boyd’s the son of one of the higher ups and is being threatened by his mother into becoming Sin’s handler. Over the course of the series the two go from enemies to friends to lovers to exs to friends to lovers again. All while the there’s spy drama, fights, and torture - and love, humor, friendship, and sweetness mixed in. Oh and it’s completely free which is always a bonus!

Honorable mentions/I’m tired of typing up my own summaries of all of these but you still read them

When all the World Sleeps by Lisa Henry and J.A. Rock

Sacrati by Kate Sherwood

Pretty Pretty Boys by Gregory Ashe

Josh of the Damned by Andrea Speed 

Murder on the Lake of Fire by Mikel J. Wilson

Bonfire by Amy Lane

In the Absence of Light by Adrienne Wilder

[thejakeformerlyknownasprince]

What kind of books do you think Rachel likes? :D

Anything with kickass female warriors in it!  Also: fashion.  And pragmatism over drama.  Ones I think would appeal to her:

Song of the Lioness by Tamora Pierce

Circle of Magic by Tamora Pierce

Howl’s Moving Castle by Diana Wynne Jones

The Tillerman Cycle by Cynthia Voigt

The Blue Sword by Robin McKinley

A Wrinkle in Time by Madeline L’Engle

The True Confessions of Charlotte Doyle by Avi

Their Eyes Were Watching God by Zora Neale Hurston

In the Forests of the Night by Amelia Atwater-Rhodes

The Ear, the Eye, and the Arm by Nancy Farmer

Hope Was Here by Joan Bauer

The Seer and the Sword by Victoria Hanley

[eskalations]

Smoke and Gunpowder, Chapter 4

A/N: Below the “read more” since it’s a bit long this time!

Summary: Even now, in the privacy of her room and away from the prying eyes of their government, he stiffened at her proximity. The careful lines drawn between the two of them seemed to blur at times like these when they were alone and out of uniform. In the dim light of her room, it was easy to imagine that they were just a quiet country boy and bold city girl again. (ROYAI GENDERBEND AU)

AO3 | FFN

Tumblr: Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5

Chapter Summary: 

"What are you doing here?" He asked in a quiet voice, aware that any of his neighbors could hear the conversation between him and his female commanding officer. Sure, it wouldn't be unusual for a man his age to be entertaining a young woman at this hour – but if anyone saw that the woman in question was the Flame Alchemist herself, they would both be in deep trouble.

"I already told you. I need you to suck my neck."

A/N: Here's another chapter! I think I've decided that, once all this is written out, I will rearrange the chapters so that they are in chronological order. As it is right now, this is just a series of oneshots - but I'm hoping that, in the end, I will have enough chapters that I can go back and make it a little easier to follow. This chapter definitely fits the mood of FMA 03 a bit more than Brotherhood, but follows the Brotherhood timeline. I wanted to go ahead and introduce Mustang's Team - however, they aren't really in this one much. I'm hoping to do a "mission" chapter in the future where we can see their personalities a bit more, so watch out for that!

Also, no I haven't forgotten Maes Hughes...he'll be introduced in due time!

Thank you for reading! Please let me know what you think!

~

East City - Spring of 1913

It was just a typical day in the office.

Raina Mustang was having an interesting morning. The night before, she had met with a few of her "sisters" at the train station and had taken them out for a night on the town. In other words, they had hopped from bar to bar – acquainting themselves with the owners and staking claims on who would get each area.

Though Madame Christmas was stationed in Central, she was well-known amongst the underground information network throughout Amestris. The bar owners knew that any agreement they made with one of Christmas's girls was sure to bring in a hefty amount of cash. Not only were the girls trained in information gathering, but they were trained in other aspects as well. Once men caught word of the sultry vixens that had just arrived in town, the cash would be rolling in, as well as the secrets.

Of course, the night before hadn't been all business. Raina and the girls had plenty of fun catching up. Alice and Madeline remarked on how much healthier and happier she looked this time around as opposed to the last time she had traveled to Central. Helen couldn't help but agree.

"I'm moisturizing more." The girl answered, nursing a glass of gin. She wasn't about to tell them that it was probably from the lack of booze in her daily diet. The last time she had gone to Central, she was still strung out from what had happened in Ishval. She still was – however, a sense of numbness had replaced the once crippling guilt that resided in her heart.

"Where's Ray?" Helen had asked as they made their way to the next bar on their list. Madeline had laid claim to The Broken Bottle, so the next stop was Wicked Whiskey. "It's been so long since I've seen him. I was hoping you would bring him out with you tonight."

"You know that we can't all be seen together." Raina reminded her, pushing a stray strand of dark hair behind her ear as a car whizzed by. The roads were busy for a Tuesday night. "It would look suspicious if he were ever to meet up with you. What would people say then?"

"That three is a better time than two." Raina shoved the girl at the implication, stumbling under her slight buzz. The high heels she had chosen to wear certainly weren't helping her balance either. They all giggled as they entered the next bar, an unspoken agreement amongst them that they would enjoy the rest of their night.

And enjoy they did – if Colonel Mustang's slight hangover wasn't evidence enough – there was a fresh bruise adorning her neck as proof of the good time she had.

So," Havoc drawled from his seat, cigarette hanging loosely from his lips. "You have a good time last night?"

The man sat with feet on top of his desk, pushing his chair back on its hind legs. Lunch was soon approaching and it was obvious that mentally he had already checked out for the day. Beside him, Breda dropped his pen as well – he had been pretending to do work for the past half hour – in favor of listening to what his boss had to say.

Knowing that she had a role to play, the young woman smirked at her comrades.

"I had an excellent time." The blonde soldier sniggered, the suggestion behind her words evident. He grabbed the cigarette from between his teeth and looked like he was going to say something else – however, her next words stopped him. "What about you, Havoc? Did you have any fun last night?"

"Hey!" The man nearly fell out of his chair. From the other side of the room, Hawkeye's lips turned up in a small smirk as he continued his paperwork. At least, someone in her office was working. "I have plenty of fun!"

"Your dating record says otherwise." Breda commented under his breath. This had the Second Lieutenant turning on him, eyes blazing in defense.

"Well, what about yours!"

"What about mine?!"

"It's not like girls are knocking down your door at the opportunity to spend the night with you!"

"How would you know?!"

"I bunked with you at the Academy. Trust me, I know these things!"

As Breda and Havoc continued to squabble, Mustang turned her eyes to the other gentlemen in the room. Falman was sitting at his desk with his nose buried in a book, ignoring the argument that was taking place across from him. The silver haired man usually kept to himself, avoiding involvement in the chaos that seemed to plague the young Colonel's office. Fuery was trying to keep to himself as well – however, the young man's dark eyes darted nervously over to the older men every few minutes as they both teetered back in their chairs.

Hawkeye, per usual, was unaffected – or at least he appeared to be.

Colonel Mustang knew the sniper better than most and couldn't help but notice the faint flush of his cheeks. It was hot in the office, but it wasn't that hot. Besides, his cheeks only seemed to redden whenever he glanced at her – which was every few minutes since he was, in fact, her bodyguard and was supposed to have his eyes on her at all times.

Who was she kidding? She knew exactly why he was blushing.

At the sight of his obvious embarrassment, she could feel the skin of her face warming as well. Turning to face the window, she gazed out at the parade grounds in front of Eastern Command, memories of last night flooding back to her as she watched new cadets cross the yard.

Yes, it was a good night indeed.

~

"I need you to suck my neck."

If the situation were any different, Raina could have laughed out loud at her adjutant's look of shock. However, she meant business. His amber eyes were nearly bugging out of his head as she stumbled into his apartment. She wasn't drunk per se, but she had consumed several drinks with the girls and was beginning to feel the after effects.

When she entered the living room, she couldn't help but chuckle. Paperwork was spread out on the young man's table, giving her a clear idea of what he had spent his night doing.

"Haven't I told you to stop bringing your work home?" She asked, glancing down at the form in front of her. It wasn't due for another week!

Hawkeye stood at the door, eyes still wide. Once he had gotten over the initial shock of her barging into his apartment, he stepped out into the hall and quickly glanced both ways. When he was satisfied that no one was there, he shut the door before turning to her with a look of disbelief.

"What?"

"What do you mean 'what'?!" The man whisper yelled, crossing the apartment. "Someone could have been following you!"

Raina gave him a smug look. "Who would be dumb enough to trail the Flame Alchemist?"

"I can think of plenty of people who would be 'dumb' enough to try and get whatever dirt they can on you, sir," He was towering over her now, his handsome features hardened by anger. Even his jaw was tense, causing his words to come out as a hiss. "You can't just be showing up here drunk!"

"I'm not drunk." She insisted, though her glassy eyes implied differently. She wasn't up to her usual "depressive" stage of inebriation – however, it was evident that she had had more than just a single glass that night. "If I were drunk, would I have been able to drive myself here?"

"You DROVE?"

Raina plopped down in the dining room chair he had been seated in just a few moments earlier. "No, I'm not that dumb."

"I'm really beginning to wonder!"

"Insubordination!" She picked up the form regarding the Bauer case that lay in front of her and held it in the air, waving it at him in a mock angry fashion. "I should write you up for that."

He reached for the paper. "Before or after you get court-martialed for fraternizing?"

Her reflexes dulled from the booze, he was easily able to pull it from her grasp. This left her pouting. Some colonel she was – acting like a petulant child.

"I told you I wasn't followed." She insisted once again, crossing her arms over chest. Her darks eyes looked up into his – despite the bleary quality to them, he could see her sincerity as well. "I promise, I wasn't."

Ray sighed, placing the paper back on the table. He left the room momentarily in the direction of the kitchen, before returning with a glass of water. Without a word, he handed her the glass. She accepted it gratefully.

"What are you doing here?" He asked in a quiet voice, aware that any of his neighbors could hear the conversation between him and his female commanding officer. Sure, it wouldn't be unusual for a man his age to be entertaining a young woman at this hour – but if anyone saw that the woman in question was the Flame Alchemist herself, they would both be in deep trouble.

"I already told you. I need you to suck my neck."

His night had been going so well – and then happened.

Without waiting for an answer, Raina discarded her long black coat over the back of her chair. He fought the urge to give her a once over as the tight navy number she had been wearing came into view. The ruby red of her lips certainly wasn't helping either. She definitely looked the part of a flirty soldier tonight.

Yes, this would look very bad to any outsider that happened upon them. Her in such sultry attire and him in his casual set of pajamas. If the neighbors caught wind of this, they would be out of the military by morning.

Shaking his head, he realized he had forgotten to respond to her unusual request.

"Why?" There was genuine curiosity in his tone. He sat in the chair next to her, back ramrod straight. This entire situation was incredibly unprofessional. The Colonel on the other hand was unbothered, unclasping the jewelry that circled her slender neck.

"Major Foster saw me walking with our source back from the Wicked Whiskey. The informant told me he had some information for me, so he offered to walk me to my apartment." She took another long sip from her glass before continuing. "I had no idea the Major was a frequent patron of the bar and that he would recognize the man. Apparently, he was a bit suspicious – so he followed us."

"He followed you?!" This information unsettled him greatly. What if the major had seen her come here? What if he figured out that the Colonel's business with the bar hand had been business rather than pleasure? Raina seemed unconcerned though.

"He followed us to my residence, where we made a big flirty display in front of the door before entering." Hawkeye opened his mouth to say something, but she raised a hand to stop him. "I paid the man a hefty amount to go back to the bar and tell them all about his conquest of Colonel Mustang. He stayed about half an hour before leaving. I mused him up a bit before he left so, if the Major saw him on his way out, there would be no question as to what we had been doing behind closed doors.

"How do you know he didn't follow you here?"

"I waited another half hour before coming to you." She leaned back in her chair, stretching her limbs out before her. The Lieutenant pointedly ignored the very high heels on her very long and exposed legs. "If the Major waited around for that long, I would question his intentions completely. He saw what he needed to and moved on – I don't doubt it."

"Then why are you here?" Hawkeye finally asked, still unsure where this story was going. It was already midnight and they both needed to be at work in a couple of hours – well, he needed to be anyways. The Colonel was probably going to trounce in late under the guise of a hangover.

At his question, she leaned forward – one elbow precariously placed on the edge of the table. There was a playful smirk on her dark features.

"Because I will see the Major tomorrow afternoon during the Aerugo talks and I need to look like I spent the night between the sheets." She put it so simply, as though what she was asking was no big deal. For someone who had been drinking earlier that night, her words were strangely sober.

Well, maybe all that stumbling around she had done earlier was because of the heels and not the booze.

Still, this wasn't a good enough explanation for him.

"Why didn't you just have your 'date' do it?" He asked, one brow raised in question. His posture had refused to relax during the entirety of their conversation and he felt as though every nerve in his body was on end. He stamped down the urge to rub a sweaty palm through his hair.

"I'm not going to let a stranger give me neck!" Her voice was a bit loud for his taste, but the incredulity was clear. Once again, he found himself staring at her in disbelief.

"Why not?!" He fought to keep his tone low. He could feel a fine sweat beginning to break out on his forehead. Maybe lighting the fireplace hadn't been such a good idea on a night like this…but how was he to know that his commanding officer would barge in and ask for a hickey?

"What do you mean 'why not'?!" Raina stood, hands firmly on her hips. In this position, she towered over him. "I have standards, you know?!"

"Shhhhh," He warned her, glancing at the thin walls of his dining area. If the elderly woman next door heard them yelling, she no doubt would come and investigate. "Would you keep your voice down?"

The Colonel crossed her arms, eyes narrowed in a glare. Rather than stand down, Hawkeye glared right back.

She knew better than to proposition him like this. She knew exactly what was a stake.

It was bad enough that he kept having to check in on her at night during her brief stint of alcoholism not that long ago, but coming and asking for "favors" of him was a whole other problem entirely.

"I'm asking this of you in a strictly professional sense." Raina promised, shifting her weight from one side to the other. "If I wasn't going to see the Major tomorrow, I wouldn't be so worried. My collar doesn't cover my neck though and I know he's going to be looking for proof of what he saw."

Her pleading eyes were on him and he had to fight back a groan.

Why did she always do this to him?

Raina saw the defeat in his eyes and used this to her advantage. She stepped closer to him, "If you do this for me, I'll finish my paperwork on time for the rest of the week."

Despite the flirty tone of her voice, Hawkeye couldn't hold back a snort.

"You wouldn't finish your paperwork on time if I held my gun to your head."

"It's part of an act." She reminded him, her face inching closer to his. In the soft light of the room, he could see every line in her face. She looked tired – but there was something else there too. It was an apology.

He knew she didn't exactly like the persona she had been given. However, just as Grumman had told her when she had been transferred to Eastern Command, it was a necessary evil for climbing the ranks – especially at her age.

Hawkeye knowing that it took a lot out of her to sacrifice her pride for the sake of their goals, chose to throw her a bone.

"I know." He conceded, his hard features softening. There was a small smile on his face which he reserved only for her. It was a fond smile. "Although there are days…."

"Stop it!" She playfully swatted his shoulder. The air was less tense than before. However, something heavy still lingered between them. Though they usually knew what the other was going to do before they did it – so familiar were they – it was situations like these where they both proved to be unpredictable.

"So will you help me?"

At the pleading look in her eyes, Hawkeye groaned.

"Fine." He surrendered, slouching back in his chair in a very un-Hawkeye like fashion. This girl was going to be the death of him.

She gave him an appreciative smile and he fought the urge to smile back – he didn't want her thinking that he enjoyed the position she had put him in. He was serious when he had told her that this needed to stop happening – they needed to be more careful. Their relationship needed to remain professional, if only for the sake of their goals. It had been what they had agreed upon when he offered to serve under her.

It seemed as time went on though that Raina had begun to regret that decision, always pushing the boundaries to see just how far she could go. He should have known it would be harder for her to keep to the rules they had established – she was still young after all – but he knew in the long run it was what was best for the both of them.

It didn't make it any easier to tell her no, though.

He was broken from his thoughts by Raina planting herself firmly in his lap.

"Hey!" He was embarrassed to hear his voice crack in surprise. Even with her usually flirty nature, this was bold action for her. He supposed it was from the last remnants of liquor running through her veins. Now, he couldn't decide if he preferred the depressive drunk Mustang or the flirty drunk Mustang.

Both had him wanting to pull his hair out.

The sniper couldn't help but stiffen as she wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer to her body. The dip of her collar had him fighting the urge to look down as her cleavage pressed flush against his chest. Noticing how tense he had become, the girl laughed.

"You act as though we've never been this close before." She slyly whispered, her breath warm against his ear. Her implication had him tensing further. "Besides, I still need to tell you about the information I received tonight."

"I don't think this is the most professional fashion to do it in, sir." His teeth were clenched as he struggled against the desire to raise his hands to her hips. He could feel his palms sweating as he rested them against the legs of the chair. "Why don't you tell me the information first – from your own chair – and then I'll assist you with your cover story."

"This will be more efficient," She insisted, her lips close to his ear. He could hear the smile in her voice. "Aren't you usually the one getting on to me about efficiency?"

It still felt so wrong to him – to have these kind of feelings for a girl who had once been his father's student. It made him feel…lecherous? Although, on the surface, there was nothing inappropriate about it besides their ranks in the military. They were both adults now, separated by barely four years of age.

But still…

His father had tasked him with protecting her and he imagined this is not what the man had meant. Despite the guilt that still lingered within him though, he could feel his resolve cracking as she hugged him tightly.

Finally, he sighed in defeat. "What did he tell you?"

Raina perked up at his question, victory firmly in her grasp. She pulled back slightly to look him in the eyes, her own dark pair alight with excitement. "It was about General Arnold."

Much like Hakuro, General Arnold was one of Raina Mustang's biggest challengers. Rather than oppose her because of her age though, he chose to target her due to her gender.

As the Colonel began to quietly (albeit excitedly) relay the information she had received about the scandal, he allowed himself to lean forward to nuzzle her neck. He could have laughed at the catch in her breath when his nose came in contact with her skin.

"What?" He asked innocently – his hands now on her hips, drawing her closer to give him better access to her neck. At the low timbre of his voice, he could feel her skin flush against his lips as he grazed the area above her collar. "Isn't this what you asked me to do?"

She hummed in response, tilting her head to the side. "Yes, but you acted so against it that I half expected you to grab a straw and make it look like I had spent the night with the owner of the world's tiniest lips."

Hawkeye couldn't help but snort. "When I receive an order, I typically follow through."

Those words had her pulling back, her eyes immediately drifting to his.

"I'm not giving you an order." Her voice was soft, vulnerable. There was regret in the way she gazed so earnestly at him. Just that look alone had him worrying that she was about to fall victim to a depressive episode. It was the look she usually gave him when they spoke about Flame Alchemy. "I'm asking you to help me as a friend – as a comrade. If you want to stop assisting me at any point, you have that choice. I have taken far too much from you already to ask for anything else."

Ray could feel his gaze soften. She had mentioned on more than one occasion that she felt guilty for keeping him from his dreams – the one's he had before she had stumbled into his life. They were dreams long forgotten, replaced by goals that were the result of his own sins. He didn't know when she had started counting his sins among her own – but she needed to stop.

"You have never asked for something that I was not willing to give." He reminded her, hands tightening on her waist so bring her closer yet again. "My success depends on your's and – if you think this will keep Major Foster off your trail – then I will help in any way I can."

She gave him a soft smile in return.

"Even if it means sucking your neck."

At the dry tone he used, she was laughing again.

Hawkeye figured if he was going to follow her into hell, there were worst ways to go. Raina couldn't help but agree.

~

"Boss?"

Colonel Mustang was shaken from her thoughts by a meek Sergeant Fuery – who, despite having been on the team for a while now, still seemed to be fairly intimidated by her. 'It's nice to have at least one other person who shows respect around here besides Hawkeye,' The girl couldn't help but think as she turned her chair.

"Yes, Sergeant?"

"Uh…" The boy stuttered, looking down at the papers in his hands. She could see the sweat forming on his hairline. "Well, I just wanted to let you know that we received a receipt of charges on behalf of the Elric Brothers."

The room quieted immediately at the mention of the young boys.

"What?" Her tone was dark, chin coming up to rest on folded hands as she continued to stare Fuery down. The boy was practically quaking in his boots now.

"Well it seems there was some property damage…"

"Property damage?!"

The young man yelped as his commanding officer ripped the paper from his hands – her eyes immediately scanning over its contents. You have got to be kidding!

Only Edward Elric could cause over 10 million cens in property damage.

She could feel her eye begin to twitch. Havoc and Breda immediately turned their attentions back to the paperwork they had been ignoring for hours – lunch break forgotten. Falman was so engrossed in his book that he still had not looked up to see what was going on around him and poor Fuery seemed to be trying to make himself blend into the wall.

The only one left unmoved was First Lieutenant Hawkeye who simply released a sigh and put down his pen, knowing exactly what was coming next.

"Fullmetal!"

Yes, it was a typical day indeed.

[soccerstl]

St. Dominic Crusaders Shut Out Rock Bridge Bruins

St. Dominic Crusaders Shut Out Rock Bridge Bruins

Sr. Madeline Bauer settles in front of Rock Bridge Jr’s Megan Floyd (27) and Katey Klucking on April 25, 2017 Senior Kassidy Louvall hammered a left-footed shot from 22 yards, headed just under the crossbar it seemed until fr. Eryn Puett got a hand on it. Unfortunately for the Rock Bridge keeper, instead of going over the crossbar it fell back in front of the goal and bounced in. That goal in the…

[rabeimwald]

Reading List 2019-2020

HISTORICAL FICTION  Girl in the Blue Coat - Monica Hesse  The War Outside - Monica Hesse  The Things We Cannot Say - Kelly Rimmer  The Point of Light - John Ellsworth (along with the rest of the series) We Must Be Brave - Frances Liardet In Another Time - Jillian Cantor Black Dove, White Raven - Elizabeth Wein The Berlin Boxing Club - Robert Sharenow  The Divided Sky - Christa Wolf (yes, the one I’ve been ranting about for literal months)  Rose Under Fire - Elizabeth Wein (read Code Name Verity first)  Circe - Madeline Miller  Song of Achilles - Madeline Miller  Schindler's List - Thomas Keneally Catch 22 - Joseph Heller (however heavily satirical)  The Gentlemans Guide to Vice and Virtue - Mackenzi Lee  The Lady's Guide to Petticoats and Piracy - Mackenzi Lee Front Lines - Michael Grant  Johnny Got His Gun - Dalton Trumbo 

NONFICTION  Blink - Malcolm Gladwell  Opening Skinner’s Box - Lauren Slater  The History of the Ancient World - Susan Wise Bauer  Sapiens: A Brief History of Humankind - Yuval Noah Harari Second-Hand Time - Swetlana Alexandrowna Alexijewitsch  Resisting Happiness - Matthew Kelly Czar's Madman -  Jaan Kross The Hero with a Thousand Faces - Joseph Campbell A Concise History of the Baltic States -  Andrejs Plakans The Ascent of Gravity - Markus Chown The Russian Revolution - Anthony Wood 

YA LITERATURE The Secret Garden – Frances Hodgson Burnett Pippi Longstocking - Astrid Lindgren Six of Crows - Leigh Bardugo Annie on my Mind - Nancy Garden The Impossible Knife of Memory - Laurie Halse Anderson Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe - Benjamin Alire Saenz  Exit, Pursued by a Bear - EK Johnson   The Bees - Laline Paul All the Bright Places - Jennifer Niven 

SCIENCE FICTION  Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown The Time Traveler's Wife - Audrey Niffeneger  The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy – Douglas Adams  Fahrenheit 451 - Ray Bradbury 

POLITICAL/CONTROVERSIAL THINGS  1984 - George Orwell  Vox - Christina Dalcher Nietzsche Reader - Friedrich Nietzsche Ethics in the Real World - Peter Singer Books v. Cigarettes - George Orwell

NOVELS North and South - Elizabeth Gaskell  The Secret History - Donna Tartt NOVEL The Picture of Dorian Gray - Oscar Wilde Einstein's Dreams -  Alan Lightman Blindness - José Saramago

MISC  The Age of Innocence - Edith Wharton  Macbeth - William Shakespeare  The Hatred Of Poetry - Ben Lerner  Nothing - Janne Teller  Reconstructing Amelia - Kimberly McCreight   Incarnadine - Mary Szybist  Yougo Senki - Carlo Zen  Othello - William Shakespeare 

[onceuponaseriesrewatch]

OUASR Press Release: 4x19 Sympathy for the De Vil

4x19 Sympathy for the De Vil

Synopsis: In fictional 1920s England, viewers meet a young Cruella, whose oppressive mother uses her Dalmations to terrorize her daughter.  Cruella is confined to her mother’s attic until a mysterious stranger arrives and empowers her to challenge her captor.  In Storybrooke, Regina gains leverage to keep Gold from interfering with her plan to rescue Robin, but her trip to New York takes the backseat when she and Emma learn that Cruella has kidnapped Henry.

Written by: David H. Goodman, Jerome Schwartz

Directed by: Romeo Tirone

Starring: Ginnifer Goodwin (Snow White / Mary Margaret Blanchard); Jennifer Morrison (Emma Swan); Lana Parilla (Evil Queen / Regina Mills); Josh Dallas (Prince Charming / David Nolan); Emilie de Ravin (Belle French); Colin O’Donoghue (Captain Killian ‘Hook’ Jones); Jared Gilmore (Henry Mills); Michael Socha (Will Scarlet); Robert Carlyle (Rumplestiltskin / Mr. Gold)

Guest Starring: Kristin Bauer van Straten (Maleficent); Patrick Fischler (Isaac Heller); Anna Galvin (Madeline De Vil); Victoria Smurfit (Cruella De Vil); Milli Wilkinson (young Cruella); Tony Giroux (dancer); Julia Harnett (dancer); Morgan Tnner (dancer)

Sympathy for the De Vil airs August 4 at 9:00 pm EST