#MORAY I SWEAR TO GOD

[miyakkenjii]

sketch dump time!! because i’m obsessed with drawing and drawing in red pen is fun plus new fandom lets go

[merakiui]

We all know that Jade is a slimy, gross, chrasamtic eel, but recently, I've been having thoughts of him being the most pathetic man in bed, and it has me giggling. As a fandom we usually see Idia, Rollo, and Zuzu as the loser versions who crumble from a crumb of pussy, but something about Jade, who usually unreadable and composed crumbling the second he gets his dick wet.

He's fighting the urge to come when he only has the tip inside of you. You're just so warm and comfy, so much better than any of his toys. Him crying from how good it feels to be inside real pussy for once, savoring every second of it. He's so pathetic that he's shooting blanks while you've only cum twice because of how quickly he busts. He swears he's better than that, but the fact that he has to actively try not to cum the moment he's inside says enough.

I love pathetic Jade. <3

- ⭐️ anon

YES!!!! I love this flavor of Jade!!! I like to imagine that before he becomes Jade "Sex God Who Makes You Cum Within Seconds" Leech he was abysmally bad (read: inexperienced) at sex. Sloppy oral, sloppy kisses, drooling over you (literally), bad at watching his teeth, way too enthusiastic and not nearly as methodical as he usually is, and of course when he's actually easing himself inside he nearly crumples on top of you because WOW!!!! He had no idea it could feel this good. The first time it happened he was so flustered he had to just,,, bury his face in your neck and shoulder all while you rubbed his back consolingly. >_<

"Jade?"

A soft hum into your skin. He is not lifting his face to look at you. Not yet.

"Jade, it's okay... It's nothing to be embarrassed about," you whisper, to which he hums again.

He's so unexpectedly cute,, such a sweet loser. You decide to try again. Your hand wraps around his still-hard dick and you tell him you'll help, but that just makes it worse because the minute you're pumping him he's shuddering through another orgasm. ;;;; he can't help it. Your hand is soft and warm; your pussy is so wet for him. He's so sensitive. He feels like a moray in mating season all over again.

He promises he's not normally like this!!! You find it so adorable that the seemingly unshakable, flawless Jade Leech has another side to him. It's strangely endearing. <3

[quill-of-thoth]

The Saga of Great Uncle Asshole And The Priest From Hell

It's thanksgiving (in the US) so have a family gathering disaster that is old enough to be funny. Almost a decade ago, after a life of stirring up drama everywhere she went, my grandmother died. She was an unhappy woman who tried to be better to her grandkids than she was to her kids, and didn't always succeed, and she's the reason that when I smell cinnamon tic tacs they're accompanied by the reek of an illusory cigarette. This is not a sad post. This is a post about the fact that her funeral was a fucking disaster and it was ultimately about 50% her fault. See, my whole family was at one point or another catholic. Grandma really enjoyed going to church in her last years because it got her out of the nursing home, and priests have to listen when you tell them about the husband you divorced and the children who think they know better than you. Grandma did not consider the fact that the local priest she'd latched onto like a talkative moray eel in a cloud of nicotine smoke was an unmitigated bigot. She left instructions that she wanted her funeral to be at that specific catholic church and for that priest to do the sermon. It didn't occur to her that the person who would be organizing her funeral would be her gay daughter and her daughter's wife.

Shit started getting real about when the doors opened to recieve mourners. Over the course of ten minutes, my aunt summoned:

her elder sister, a paralegal

my father, who has never seen a conflict he would not cheerfully walk away from

Their younger brother, in order to swear at the priest

My mother, who hadn't had a good opportunity to fight a priest since we left our own church and was game to do it again.

This left me, the eldest grandchild, in charge of the receiving line, despite the fact that I knew approximately no one there. My brother and cousins were woodenly shaking hands and then whispering "who's that?" "I don't know." My aunt's husband was escorting the elderly and infirm up the stairs one at a time. My uncle's wife was also around but she knew even fewer people and was mostly listening at the door of the ongoing argument.

So when my brother and Boy cousin went to see if we could pry someone who knew who was related to us out of the argument and I was busy trying to convince an octegenarian that she did NOT need to figure out which of her cousins had married one of grandma's siblings before sitting down, Girl Cousin was alone at the door.

Great Uncle Asshole arrived in a storm of curses and a faux-coonskin cap. He blew past Girl Cousin, thumped his cane up the steps, and seized my hand. It was like shaking hands with an extremely strong mummy. "You look just like your mother! It's the hair, what a bird's nest. Where's your daddy? And the rest of Helen's brood."

I muttered something about them finalizing details with the priest.

"Well, they'll come see me soon enough. Bet you don't know who I am!" I didn't know who anyone was. Everyone older than me was having a verbal cage match with a member of the clergy or escorting some other old fogey to their seats, everyone younger than me had even fewer clues, and my only hope was to wrap this conversation as fast as possible. "Nope!" I said, "I haven't seen most of the people here in years." If I had ever seen them in the first place. He was going to be mad, but I figured if I had to be the bouncer I could probably take an eighty-something year old guy who breathed like the surgeon general's personal warning to smokers. I could at least shut the door on him.

"Of course you wouldn't! Your gran wouldn't have told you. I'm your great uncle Roger, and I'm here to bury the hatchet, by which I mean your grandma! She and I swore over our father's casket we'd never be under the same roof again while we both lived, and by god I kept my oath!" People were starting to stare, and it was at this moment that a thirty-something man in a suit sprinted up the stairs, and my uncle's wife, with a look of dawning horror, called her husband. "Roger's here." The middle aged folks descended immediately. Here is a snapshot of the ensuing conversation: "Roger, why don't we find you a seat?" - my mother in her best teacher voice "Glad to see you're doing well enough to make it" - My father, in his best 'good god I want to be anywhere else' voice. "Take me to the coffin! I want to see her with my own two eyes!" - Great Uncle Asshole, "And hang up my **** hat! Killed it myself!" "I'm so sorry, I didn't know he could walk that fast" - strange suit man "If you are QUITE finished, I am starting the ceremony in ten minutes" - the priest

As my father and his brother towed a grinning and cursing old man to the furthest reaches of the family section, my mother and my oldest aunt caught all the cousins up on the argument with the priest. My youngest aunt was still crying while her wife stared fixedly at the stained glass panes and periodically handed over tissues. The upshot of it all was that my aunt and her wife would be allowed to attend the funeral (on pain of the whole family literally walking out on the priest) but would not be allowed to take communion, because the priest didn't believe in their marriage. My aunt's wife had neglected to point out that, being Jewish, she wasn't going to take communion anyway. "That's fucked" said boy cousin, and the four of us immediately resolved in whispers to refuse communion as well. The priest opened his sermon with pointed remarks about the older generation's devotion and respect for the church. He continued on through psalms and all that until he got to the blessing of the eucharist and asked the family up to receive communion. My father, who hadn't taken communion since I could remember, stayed seated. My mother stayed seated. My aunts and uncles stayed seated. The cousins stayed seated. About a third of the church didn't move. "Well father, I'll have mine! These young folks think hey have all the time in the world to get right with the lord, but you and I know better!" The priest, who had been visibly hoping god would smite us, turned a wincing glare on my great uncle and the series of distant relatives and nursing home neighbors who were now shuffling up. The service dragged on. We were lined up to say goodbye to everyone, while the suit man (who would turn out to be my second cousin) bodily hauled great uncle asshole and his coonskin cap down the stairs. "I should have known my sister wouldn't manage to raise any good Catholics! Horrible woman." he said loudly as he was stuffed into a car driven by suit man's apparent twin. The priest approached as we were finally ready to leave, to ask why we were so stubborn that we deprived ourselves of communion. After all, unlike my youngest aunt, we weren't obvious sinners! "Oh, I'm Lutheran" - My eldest aunt. "I'm an atheist" - My uncle "I don't think you're qualified to bless anything." - My mother, who learned her religion primarily from a horde of socialist-leaning nuns.

With that, we left the wreck of my grandmother's funeral behind. "Helen," said my mother, very deliberately, when we were safely in the car, "would have HATED that." My dad started laughing. "Are you kidding? She would have loved that! It would have been all she complained about for years!"

[theropoda]

that post i made abt moraI ocd was about stupid shit like posts that suicidebait you for not having sex or going to the club. it's not about "Ohhhh i feel like a bad person bc ppl say supporting genocide is bad??? :(" I swear to GOD.

[furbyobsessedpup]

ouuuugh fellow red sun enjoyers...where are you....red sun enjoyers....please I need someone to go feral over Eloise Deorwine with...my brain has been latching onto her aggressively lately...I don't even have thoughts I just go rrrghttgddrggh....eloise...shes so pretty.... yeah eilos too or whatever. I have also seen art of him you will never see. Dot dot dot ivain x eilos HIOKJLFHIJLK IVAIN THO. they are so sleazy and stupid and horrible and I love them for that. Tried to draw them once. Failed miserably. Still think about that sometimes. I can't draw any of the blorbos. Which sucks but whatever

i just recently latched onto gunhilde as well <3333 shes so beautiful to me. Fun fact when I listened to the magnus archives for the first time I was imagining her as daisy, I also imagine daisy's voice when I think of her lol OMG AND CYRUS. He has the same name as the main character of my OC world and he DOES IT BETTER. Also Celeste told me he has a huge d- *gets dragged off stage* *crawls back on stage* moray is so badass. I swear to God. moray is so cool I do not think about moray enough. More moray thoughts in kip's brain Please. Thank you i would talk about Dr Eitzech but. I have been revoked of my talking about Dr Eitzech priveleges by Celeste itself. </3 /silly woah! long post! I love you red sun

[vulpeskorsak]

Day 11 of Whumptober 2024: Haunted

No. 11: SEEING DOUBLE Convenience Store | Loneliness | “Leave no trace behind, like you don’t even exist.” (Taylor Swift, Illicit Affairs)

AO3 got banned in my country and VPNs have not been working well on my PC lately, so I am not going to post these there for now. But hopefully I can do that at some point.

This is taking place in my own DnD/fantasy world.

Dr. Victor Moreau is my mostly human fleshsmith inventor (KibblesTasty Homebrew class).

Ludwig Richter is a tiefling and a former gravedigger turned archeologist who wields a rifle and a battle shovel named Charon.

I wrote a story on Ludwig killing "ghoulified" Victor for Whumptober 2022 (Day 17). This is continuing many years after that. There is a happy ending.

--------------

Haunted

It has been over a decade since he killed Victor. Or at least his reanimated ghoulish corpse. But Ludwig can swear he can sometimes feel his presence still. And not just when he finds a glove under a sofa discarded during a night of passion, nor when one of his museum workers triggers an experimental trap in a book set up at least fifteen years ago.

No. Sometimes he can feel Victor's touch on his skin as clear as day. But he never sees anything. Not even with his magical eye which is supposed to see most things. He has seen ghosts with it before. And hidden magic. And invisible people. But there is nobody there. Ever. The only times he can see Victor is in his dreams.

He feels wet and cold and he can hear sorrowful whale-like singing in those dreams. He is often sitting on a rock in the middle of an ocean or on a sand bar next to the water. Occasionally he is half-submerged. Then he would see movement in the water. A long dark form swimming towards him. Sometimes he sees even bigger forms in the distance. Massive ones even. Merfolk.

And then he would see Victor's pale face just below the surface, his mouth spread in a smile with dozens of sharp needle-like teeth. It is a friendly smile. He remembers his love's face well. He knows what his friendliness looks like even with the sharper teeth.

He tried reaching out. He tried touching or grabbing him. But he would always dive back before he could reach him, a long slick tail, like that of a moray eel, flicking out of the water for a moment. So now he just stares back, trying to match the smile at least a little bit with his tiefling fangs. Sometimes Victor laughs at the faces he ends up making. Or at least does something that resembles laughter. He cannot actually hear him.

A few times they have played a game. Where Ludwig would briefly touch the water nearby him, creating a ripple. Then Victor would touch the same spot. Almost like their hands were just touching. His hand is webbed and clawed. He would have been delighted with such an unusual transformation if it had happened while he were alive.

He has no clue why he sees Victor like that in his dream. Perhaps, it is because he buried him in the ocean. Stuffed his coffin full of rocks and let it sink to the deepest depths, following what he at the time was sure was a message from the ellusive Ervi, God of Life and Death. He is still mostly sure. What else could it have been? Perhaps, then it is his subconscious reminding him of that moment, making Victor looks like one those terrifying merfolk from the abyssal parts of the ocean. Or, perhaps, such burial cursed him to be some sort of an undiscovered dream creature, tormenting him, reminding him how alone he is when he wakes up, making him curse himself again and again for never saying "I love you" out loud to the man he loves so dearly. He talked to priests, mages, witches and demons and even to an archfey about it. But everyone assured him that Victor no longer exists in this world, that he is dead and that there is nothing or nobody haunting Ludwig. So, it must be just his imagination. In the dreams and in reality.

[anachronistic-falsehood]

OK NOW THAT YOUVE OFFICIALLY FINISHED HANNIBAL I CAN TELL YOU MY MASON VERGER STORY. OH MY GOD. so . back when i first watched hannibal i was liveblogging my experience over discord chats with aster since shes the one who recommended it to me . ok. and this was myyyy senior year of college so i was ENTRENCHED in marine biology type courses ok. i specifically had a class on aquarium exhibit design and i was going a little bit insane abt it because my professor sucked. anyway. i an rambling. so i see mason vergers motherfucking eel tank and i go NUTS about it.

THAT THING IS SO GODDAMN EMPTY. EELS NEED SHIT TO HIDE IN AND HE IS KEEPING THEM IN THE AQUARIUM EQUIVALENT OF A CEMENT BRICK. oh it made me so mad. notice the timestamp too this was like. near-midnight sleep deprived madness. theres like a whole rant about enrichment along with this that im not including bc it spanned the course of like 3 hours.

AND THEN . HE FUCKING GOT EATEN BY THE EELS. AND I FELT THE STRONGEST DAMN SENSE OF RETRIBUTION EVER SPECIFICALLT BECAUSE ONE OF THE EELS GOES INTO HIS MOUTH. I WAS LIKE . THATS WHAT YOU GET BITCH. you become the hide hole for them now.

now you think this would be the end of my insanity. you underestimate my power. that goddamn eel tank lived in my head RENT FREE and it makes me SO MAD every single time i rewatch hannibal. and aster has to suffer because i bring it up so much bc i think its hilarious

<< these are from my second hannibal rewatch which i think is hilarious because its almost exactly a year after i finished watching it yhr first time. i swear i didnt do that on purpose but its REALLY funny

also at my last job we had a moray eel and we would regularly dive in the tank with her so i got a lot of Real Actual Eel Welfare experience so every once in a while id just say shit like this

anyway. thats the eel saga . every day i am thinking about mason vergers eel tank and the fact that his death is so fucking perfect to me specifically for this insane reason . eel retribution forever

OH MY GOD. MAC THAT IS HILARIOUS. OF COURSE U WOULD GO INSANE OVER AN EEL TANK THIS IS SO MAC CORE!!! i may not be a marine biologist but i knew those little guys were not being kept in a proper tank and it was killing me and i also felt sooooo fucking happy over his death like FUCK YES. FUCK YES. KILL HIM. GET FUCKED BOY!!!!!! i was so happy 2 see him dead. holding ur hand rn mac we both hate mason verger and loved seeing him get murdered by his sad mistreated eels <3 EEL RETRIBUTION FOREVER!!!!!!

[rockk-lobsterr]

guys this shit tastes so fucking bad never drink it

i swear to god it smells and tastes like extremely expired sausage it’s actually insane

and absolutely foul like please be careful out there. you never know when you’ll

trip and fall and your face will land in a glass of Glen Moray Single Malt Scotch Whisky

thankfully i didn’t suffer on my own dime as my stepdad is the owner of this bottle

sorry if you like it i mean no offense to you

[whentheorcinusbeorca]

One-shot: A meeting between two alike souls

Manta belongs to @gaiakoraidon(@thepirarucuandtheorca)!

Manta had decided to give Team Virus's base another visit.

She couldn't get the day she went with Toad to meet Anemone and Goonyan out of her mind, especially the time when they had organized some papers together.

Standing near the door, she remembered how she'd gotten to this point.

---

"Toad? Can I talk to you about something?"

"Yeah? What is it?"

"Well..." She rubbed the edge of one of her sleeves as she continued to think. "Do you remember when we were arranging research papers and... There were these specific pages about Monsters and their family classifications?"

"Oh." He scratched his head a bit. "You're talking about Moray's papers, right?"

"Moray?"

"Mhm. They're not really the type to work with others most of the time, but they're actually a really nice person once you get to know them. Anemone's been taking care of them for a long time, and she's really proud of it, even more than her Amoeba Goonyans, but she wouldn't admit it in public."

"I see."

A silence was shared between the two for a while.

"I want to see them."

"I can help you get to their room if you want. Do you need it?"

"I'll be fine. Thanks for offering, Toad."

---

And so she'd found herself at what would possibly be the room she could find the person she was looking for.

She knocked.

"Hello?"

No response.

She knocked again.

"Are you in there?"

Again, no response.

She decided that she was going to come in no matter what.

Hey, Moray. I've been thinking about something.

"Mhm."

I mean, it's probably not gonna matter at all, but... I think I'm actually gonna try flirting with the next person who comes in the room.

"Petrel..." They sighed, setting down their coffee. "You aren't serious about that. That isn't going to work, and you know it."

Moray, I'm serious about everything. Even Souls. Speaking of, if you haven't given me one already, you definitely should...

There was a knock at the door.

"No, Petrel, I'm not."

C'mon, just this once—

"You keep saying that, yet you've forced me to get you one every time I'm in a match with everyone."

Another knock, this time with someone's voice accompanying it.

Moraaaaay... Pleeeeease?

"Petrel, I swear to God—"

The door clicked.

As she opened the door, she could hear the noise of something knocking over stuff from within.

Stepping inside, she found nobody there, only a computer, some papers, and shelves full of books.

"If you're in there, I'm not going to hurt you at all. I mean, unless you get on my bad side and you deserve it, but other than that, I'm completely harmless."

Nothing.

"Y-you are?"

The source of the voice slowly peeked out from under the desk, face partially covered by a hood. They appeared a little shook up, but otherwise physically okay.

"Did I spook you?"

The stranger nodded.

"You're... Moray, right?"

They hesitated briefly, but slowly nodded.

"Toad told me about you. Well, not a whole lot, but enough to get a little basic picture on who you are."

"Mister... Toad?"

"Yeah." She held out a hand. "I'm Manta. Nice to meet you, Moray."

Moray hesitated some more, then slowly stood up, adjusting their hood so that more of their face could be seen.

"Y-yeah. Nice to meet you, too."

The half-Monster looked across the room. "That's a lot of books you have there."

The researcher's mind raced as they continued to fathom the sight of this woman who had essentially broken into their workplace and try to come up with something to say.

Okay, how should I start this? Do we talk about books now? No, no, the very first thing you should do after giving someone your name is ask what they like... General question first, then specifics, general question first, then specifics... Yeah, there we go. Let's do this...

"You like yokai?"

WRONG ORDER WRONG ORDER WRONG ORDER—

"Yokai?"

"They're spirits, basically. There's actually a few Monsters that take resemblence to them, come to think of it. I've written the most about those in a few papers I left somewhere..."

"You mean these?" she asked, pulling out a stapled packet.

"You had them the whole time?!"

"Hey, I thought this was really good. You really put your heart into it."

"Oh, tha— Wait, the subject! You know about the Nine-tails, right? Or at least saw one?"

"Yeah. I know someone who has that as a Monster form."

"Right, right, anyway, that shares similarities to the kitsune, which can have up to nine tails the longer they live, and..."

She lost herself in her thoughts as they continued to talk about whatever they had on their mind.

It was almost like her and her own fascination with rocks, crystals, and the like.

"...of course, the tengu is my favorite, especially the kotengu, since— Were you listening?"

"Oh, sorry, I was just..."

"I-it's fine, some of it isn't even important anyway."

"Uh-huh."

Silence was exchanged between the two.

"Oh. You want to know about my research, right?"

"Mainly."

"So, each type of Monster has different variations, putting it into their own family. These different variations have different colors, and some are actually rarer than others. Like—"

"Does the term 'Negative' ring a bell?"

"That's exactly what I was getting to! So every Monster has a Negative variant in their families, but the Nega-Phantom, Nega-Minotaur, Nega-Oculus, and Nega-Doll are the only ones who haven't been properly documented yet."

"While we're on that topic," Manta interrupted, "I'm actually a Nega-Gargoyle. My dad's side has a lot of them in the family. I got it a few years after me and Orca were separated a few years ago, and—"

"WAIT, YOU KNOW HER?!"

"Is...that a problem?" She furrowed her brow in confusion.

"No. No, it's not, it's just..." They averted their gaze for a split moment. "I thought Octo was her first friend, that's all..."

"It's fine. I never thought you and Octo would bond over finding your respective families."

Their eyes widened as they heard this. "You knew about that?"

"No, I didn't. I just thought that—"

Moray, I'm done waiting. I'm gonna do it now.

"No, Petrel, wait—"

In a poof, Manta was suddenly standing in front of a humanoid bird Monster with gray feathers towering over her.

"Come here often?"

She stared at the thing who had just did something that she knew was doing something that didn't seem platonic in the slightest.

She laughed.

"What?" it asked. "Why are you laughing?"

"Okay, you made a good effort, but nice try. First of all, that was amateur flirting. Second, I'm probably way out of your league. You were trying to flirt with me, right?"

"So what if I was," the Monster snapped.

See, Petrel? Moray asked them. I told you that wasn't going to work.

"Sh-shut up, Moray..."

"So, Petrel, if that's who you are," the half-Monster said, "you might have some sort of clue as to how you first awakened."

"I thought you'd never ask!" Petrel perked up. "You see, Moray's family disappeared one day years ago, and they felt a whole bunch of strong emotions at once trying to find them, and thus, I was born! Well, I was actually always in them the whole time, but it only took that moment for me to wake up for the first time!"

"So you're a half-Monster, too?"

"Uh-huh! Nega-Birdman, that's me!"

"Do you know how you're like this? Or Moray?"

"Actually... That's the problem. They're trying to figure it out themself. Their entire family was human, so my existence was pretty much an anomaly from the start. Thanks for asking me about me being here, though!"

This case reminded her of Clione in a way.

"You're welcome. And you're still bad at being romantic."

"I WASN'T TRYING TO BE ROMANTIC!" they screeched, fixing to send her flying with a punch.

Faster than they could register what was now happening, their hand was caught by something rough.

Looking up, they saw that there was another Monster, much larger than them, holding their fist back.

The aforementioned Nega-Gargoyle form she'd talked about.

"Nice try, bucko."

She threw them across the room with one swing, launching them right into one of the shelves.

Big mistake.

"Oh, hey, Manta, heard you were coming again, so—"

Anemone had come in right as Petrel fell to the floor.

"Oh. Oh my."

"Anemone, I can explain," she told her.

"I was trying to platonically flirt with her and she assumed it was romantic and it wasn't romantic!" Petrel squawked.

"Okay, so..." She motioned between the two. "This was because...?"

"Look, I'll tell you everything..."

---

"Yeah, that definitely makes sense now."

The half-Monsters, now in human form again, had just finished telling her about the conversation they'd managed to string up and what had happened afterwards.

"I'm glad you understood."

Moray and Anemone both exchanged smiles, something Manta couldn't help but note.

No wonder she's so proud of them.

She herself smiled seeing that.

I think we'll be great friends.

[snorpy-fizzlebean]

🌊...Lapis?🌊

Mermaid AU masterpost

[sirloozelite]

Rex gives Kaeden ‘The Dad Talk’... again!

(Inspired by a discussion I had with @rangerslayer-97. I know I said I’d do this as an actual chapter, but I couldn’t get it to work properly, so have a drabble instead. Hope that’s ok?)

Rex: LARTE!

Kaeden: Oh here we go again!

Ahsoka: Right on schedule.

Morai: (chirps mischievously)

Kaeden: Don’t laugh at me!

Rex: WHERE ARE YOU LARTE!!

Ahsoka: You better answer him. You know what happened last time.

Kaeden: Seriously... this is like the tenth time he’s done this! Can’t you make him stop?!

Ahsoka: Nope!

Kaeden: >:(

Rex: Ah! Found you Larte... now, WHAT THE KRIFF DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING TO MY DAUGHTER/LITTLE SISTER!!!!

Morai: Hoot hoot!

Kaeden: Rex... please... this is getting ridiculous now! I thought I had your blessing to date Ahsoka?

Rex: Oh you do Doctor... you do... but that still means I’m watching you!

Ahsoka: Hopefully not all the time Rex or else you’ll be seeing more than you want to.

Morai: (chirps in laughter)

Kaeden: Not helping Ahsoka!

Rex: YOU SEE!!! THIS IS WHAT I MEAN! AHSOKA WOULD HAVE NEVER HAVE MADE SUCH A LEWD JOKE BEFORE SHE WAS DRAGGED INTO THE SACK BY YOU LARTE!!! YOU’VE CORRUPTED HER!!!!

Kaeden: DAMMIT AHSOKA! YOU JUST HAD TO MAKE THE JOKE!

Ahsoka: XD

Rex: IF YOU DARE HURT MY BEST FRIEND, I’LL FEED YOU TO A RANCOR... ARE WE CLEAR LARTE!!!!

Kaeden: Crystal captain.... just as we were the last dozen times you said it! I’m not gonna hurt Ahsoka!

Rex: You better not.... or it’s the morgue for you!

Kaeden: 0_0

Ahsoka: To be fair... you did kinda hurt me last night Kaeden when we were....

Kaeden: STOP! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD STOP!!

Ahsoka: XD

Morai: XD

Rex: ... LARTE!!!!! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!!!!

Kaeden: 0_0

Rex: YOU’VE NOT ONLY DEFILED MY COMMANDER... BUT YOU’VE DONE SO IN A WAY THAT HURT HER?!?!?!?! WHAT SORT OF THINGS HAVE YOU BEEN UP TOO TOGETHER!?!?!?!?

Kaeden: REX PLEASE.... THIS IS GETTING STUPID NOW! I SAID I WAS SORRY!!!

Ahsoka: Yeah... I gotta agree with her on that Rex. You might be taking this a bit too far!

Rex: You don’t get a say in this Ahsoka! She’s turned you from a respectable military mastermind and powerful Force user into some sex crazed heart eyed fool!

Ahsoka: Hey! I am not ‘sex crazed’!

Morai: (chirps mischievously)

Ahsoka: AM NOT!

Rex: SEE!!! SEE!!! EVEN THE BLOODY BIRD THINKS YOU ARE! I SWEAR LARTE... I’M GONNA MAKE YOU PAY FOR WHAT YOU’VE DONE TO AHSOKA... AND THEN I’M GONNA TAKE HER AS FAR AWAY FROM YOU AS POSSIBLE TO GET HER BACK TO NORMAL! I CAN’T STAND THIS ANYMORE! I DON’T WANT TO RUN INTO THE TWO OF YOUR FROLICKING AROUND AGAIN!!!! IT BURNS MY EYES!!!

Ahsoka: 0_0

Kaeden: 0_0

Morai: (chirps with laughter)

[jimlingss]

IF YOU CANT BEAT THE COMPETITION YOU MARRY THEM AKAIWUQHWHHS OH MY GOD WORDS OF WISDOM KINA😂💍😜

That's exactly what I'm doing from now on😂

I've been loving your recent stories.. MORAI HAD ME ON THE EDGE!! It was so innovative especially bcz I am not a manga person so for me it was a new story.

LOOOOL it took me a second to figure out where that was from but lol I DO have words of wisdom some of the time!!! I swear my brain isn’t one celled always. Anyway, glad you enjoyed Moirai as well :D

[scotianostra]

On February 17th 1688 the execution of James Renwick brought about the end of a period Scotland should be wholly ashamed of, known as The Killing Time.

I gave a wee bit background on Saturday about Renwick, to understand things better I shall go into the history of the period briefly.

In Scotland in 1638, the National Covenant set out the belief that there should be no interference by kings in the affairs of the Presbyterian Church of Scotland.

The Covenanters, as they were known, were Scots who signed the National Covenant. However, the Stuart kings believed in the Divine Right of Kings – amongst other things, they believed that they were the spiritual heads of the Church of Scotland. The Covenanters and their supporters could not and would not accept this; no man, not even a king, could be spiritual head of their church. The Covenanters fiercely believed that only Jesus Christ could be spiritual head of a Christian church.

The entire Covenanting struggle was built around this conflict of beliefs – people against king. King Charles I had introduced the Book of Common Prayer to Scotland in 1637, to the anger and resentment of the populace. Famously, Jenny Geddes, at the first introduction of the new liturgy, is reported to have stood up in church, thrown her stool at the priest and shouted out Dare ye say mass in ma lug? That particular service was abandoned, well if it happened at all that is, some people believe it is just a made up story to excuse why it all kicked off, and kick off it did! 

After Charles I beheading, under the Protectorate support for Cromwell waxed and waned within the Scottish Church. However, when Charles II landed at Garmouth in Moray in Scotland in 1650, he went on to sign the National Covenant, to the delight of the Scots. He was crowned King of Scots at Scone in 1651. 

After Cromwell’s death and Charles took, in 1660, the crown of Englandthe king went back on his word to the Scots and assumed superiority over the church. He appointed bishops and declared that opposition to the new liturgy would be treason. The Scots would have been loyal to this member of the Stuart dynasty but for that one sticking point, it was throughout this period that I believed the Stewart dynasty was lost in Scotland. 

From 1638, when the Covenant was signed, until 1688 when Prince William of Orange made a bloodless invasion of Great Britain, a great deal of death, torture, imprisonment, and transportation would follow. Because of the fundamental conflict in beliefs the Covenanters were obliged to hold their religious services in secret, and these services were known as Conventicles, held in out of the way places, often in the moors.

Renwick, at any rate, was the last of the Covenanters who submitted to the public executioner; only a few months yet remained when officers in the field were empowered to force an oath to the King, called  the oath of abjuration asserting the right of the present royal family to basically do what the hell they wanted, apart from peoples religious objections to this, you can see how conflict came about. Many of the battles I have posted about, where it has been Scot against Scot, are down to this period of time.

As a preacher Renwick managed some five years or so of secret Conventicles ministering in hidden homes and glens of Scotland, and all the while the law sought him ever closer. By the time it finally hunted him to ground in 1688, so many of the faith’s august champions had already taken their martyrs’ crowns that at age 25 Renwick was among the biggest game remaining. How often cowled on ghostly moors by torchlight had the young reverend rehearsed the steadfast refusal he might one day deliver to his persecutors? 

“I cannot own this usurper as the lawful king, seeing both by the word of God such an one is incapable to bear rule, and likewise by the ancient laws of the kingdom which admit none to the crown of Scotland until he swear to defend the Protestant religion, which a man of his profession cannot do,” he declared when asked to take the oath and perhaps save his life, like all good martyrs he of course refused.

The captain who finally caught Renwick is supposed to have exclaimed at seeing his youth, “Is this the boy Renwick that the nation has been so much troubled with?” 

The supposed outlaw minister turned 26 two days before his execution.

On the day of his execution, some people tried to get Renwick to pray for the king. But he replied, 

“I am within a little while to appear before Him who is King of kings, and Lord of lords, who shall pour shame, contempt, and confusion upon all the kings of the earth who have not ruled for him”.

His last words were, 

“Lord, into thy hands I commend my spirit, for thou hast redeemed me, Lord God of truth.” 

He was then hanged in the Grassmarket in Edinburgh – the last Covenanter martyr to be publicly executed.

During his life Renwick never published any of his writings or sermons but soon after his death they were collected, transcribed and published, with a faithful follower, the Reverend Alexander Sheilds (1660?-1700), composing first a eulogy of his death and later a fuller biography of the man.

The first photo is a depiction of James Renwick being led to execution in the Grassmarket down the West Bow, half the street was swept away to form Victoria Street, although the bottom of the street is still known as West Bow, the Martyrs monument, as seen in the second photo is a stones throw from the street, on The Grassmarket.

There is no definitive number of how many died during The Killing Time, the executions in Edinburgh certainly ran into three figures, many more died while awaiting sentnce or execution in the Covenanters' Prison in Greyfriars Kirkyard, and of course the battles between Covenanters and Royalists soldiers. 

If you want to know the full story of James Renwick check out the herehttp://www.truecovenanter.com/bio/howie_bios_renwick_james.html

For much more on the Covenanters in general check the Scottish Covenanter Memorials Association web site herehttp://www.covenanter.org.uk/

[singrate]

dumb shit people have done at my high school this week

its the last week of the aussie school year which always takes place on another plane of existence because of the heat and also everyone is just so done with each other’s shit, so some ridiculous things have gone down. i cant remember them all so here’s a small ish list.

- my incredibly hungover christian studies teacher walked into monday 3rd period, heard a kid say a terrible joke, nodded woodenly and said, ‘humour. very good.’

- same teacher spotted a kid with an unopened bottle of nippy’s lemon lime soda (an unsung aussie school canteen hero), reminded him of the no soft drinks in class rule, took it and chugged it. she was less hungover after that.

- a kid said to my PE teacher, ‘i can’t play baseball because i dont wanna get sun cancer.’

- later in the same PE lesson six or so kids were sent to get a high jump mattress. exited the storeroom two minutes later in two perfect lines with the mattress balanced on their heads. ran a lap around the oval with legs in perfect sync before gently placing it on the grass in front of my very unimpressed teacher.

- a handful of kids in the same class evaded participation by hiding in the change rooms and playing handball with three tennis balls at once (when you play it every day in primary school you get pretty good). im fairly sure the sun cancer girl was in there.

- in maths everyone had returned their textbooks before our teacher told us to so we were wasting the lesson by doing sudokus. a girl put a number in the wrong place and said ‘oh my god i fucked up i hate everything,’ and honestly, a mood.

- one of my friends called me a bastard moray eel and then threw a handful of hummus at my arm. i wiped it on her leg so she wiped it on the back of my shirt where i couldn’t reach to get it off.

- i called a friend a grasshole because a teacher was around and our very christian school has a strict no swearing policy. i think this was during a debate over whether or not water is wet.

- this debate lasted for at least three hours not including the classes we didnt have together. i won when i sent her this video that night.

- we went to the beach for a ‘celebration day’ because we’d run out of christmas movies to watch and the kids who remembered to bring bathers got to go swimming. one girl forgot to bring bathers and went in the water in a sports bra and undies. she is my icon.

- on the same day we had a sandcastle competition and the group that won had literally just buried a kid so his face was sticking out of the sand. they won ten dollars between seven people and spent it on a massive ice cream sundae which the kid who got buried ate.

[softichill]

*vibrates to an unholy degree* playitplayitplayi-yoooooo Sofffttt you have no idea how much it'd make my life rn if you knew about the prable and those silly gay British men. I mean I've written 9.2 k words about them now. Sarcastic summary of my fic is : Stanley wins the stupid bitch award and turns into a plant. Everything else would be spoilers. For both things. I ordered an IHOP burger today. It was good. Did you know they made those? Or do you have those where you live? Or only whataburgers as far as the eye can see. I have literally no frame of reference. I am texasless. And I hope I haven't been bugging you with the @ posting. I wanted to show you the baby stingrays and tell you crypto people are leaving your state. Let me know if I should stop. And stingrays are basically flat sharks by lineage so they are the most pettable sharks as well. Flat friends that have an eternal flat fuck Friday curse upon them. And weird eyes. I swear if anyone redesigns Big Boy at all the nose/eye thing is the only thing I wanna see. No conventionally attractive bs. Just make the dude the freaky shark man he was anatomically meant to be. I'm biased. I like my fishes to look like my fishes. I love me some spooky fish anatomy. Like stargazers. They are awesome. They're just... Like that and I respect them greatly for it. I'd give them a pet but I don't need to be poisoned. I could pet a flounder though. I'm sure they'd rather I don't though. At least I CAN pet the moray eels. If nobody else has got my back I know eels do. Song? I've got a few.... The Devil You Know by Blues Saraceno.

I will eventually I swear!!!! Soon my friend

I've had iHop, but not their burgers :0 I mostly just get pancakes. There's a number of Whataburgers, there's 2-3 in my area, but Texas is big enough that they're spread pretty evenly.

You haven't been bugging me!! Actually it's possible that tumblr hasn't been sending me notifs w/ them... I'll have to check later

Yesss flat fuck friday friends......... I love stingrays a ton. Big pancakes. They actually only attack if they feel threatened, so if you go to a place w/ a touch pool that has them you should be fine

Oh my god stargazers are wonderful. The name sounds so pretty but really they're so goofy-looking

I recommend Yumeyume by Deco*27!! Just a fun cute Miku song. It also was the intro to a Project Mirai game, so it has an equally cute animation to go with it!

[succulentbud]

I don't really like the splatoon manga but the fact that one of the characters' favorite stages is Moray Towers and they're an e-liter main is so spot on I swear to god