#Like. If they panic even slightly they start going 'oh sorry I can't understand you :(' and don't really try to understand further

[misskamelie]

Boh, prima esperienza dove ho dovuto chiamare il 112 si è rivelata abbastanza confusionaria. Per fortuna che non era niente di grave, I guess??

[crdteezv]

Privacy - Haechan

Paring:  !childhood friends/best friend’s brother/roommates to lovers !! haechan x afab! reader

Genre: non-idol! au, smut

Synopsis: You've been struggling with money ever since you lost your job. You even got kicked out of your apartment, so you asked your best friend if you could stay with her for a bit. However, with her being out of town, she insists that you stay with her older brother, Haechan. The two of you were inseparable as kids, but it's been years since you last saw him. Now, living under the same roof, you can’t help but wonder if you’ll ever be able to resist the perverted fantasies you’ve slowly begun to develop about him…

 Warnings: smut. !teasing/hard dom! haechan, perv reader, he is slightly a perv too but it’s mainly the reader, reader loves the smell of his cologne for some reason…, the reader humps his what???, reader takes videos/pictures of him, invasion of privacy, dirty talk, HEAVY HUMILIATION, teasing, praise/degradation, voyeurism, light nipple play, mirror sex, use of sex toys, kissing,  fingering, oral (giving), facefucking, manhandling, lots of hair pulling, masochism, light spanking, edging, overstimulation, cockwarming, unprotected sex

Word Count: 6.6k words

A/N: Y’all just have to hear me out on this one… I’ve had this idea for over a year now and just didn’t know who I wanted to write it for, but now inspiration struck and I finally wrote it!! I have rarely seen any fics like this before with the reader being a perv, so I wanted to try it out. I did get a little carried away with this, so understand that this isn’t for everyone. So, If you don’t like it, don’t read it. I hope you guys enjoy! Also, I plan on writing a bonus drabble related to this soon! Whenever I do, I’ll make sure to add it here!!

You lost your job and now can't afford your apartment's rent. You used to have a steady office position that covered your expenses, but the company went bankrupt and had to lay off all its employees. You've been trying to find a new one for weeks, but with bills piling up, you had no choice but to move out of your place.

“Aw, I’m sorry they’re kicking you out of your apartment. That’s so unfair. Can’t you ask them to extend the lease and promise to pay them back next month?” your best friend asked you over the phone.

“I already did, but it’s been two months, and they can’t extend it any longer.”

“Damn, well, I’d say you could stay with me, but I’m going to be out of town for the whole month. Hey, maybe you can stay with Haechan!”

At first, you didn’t know what to say. You’ve always had a secret crush on her older brother, Haechan, but you never told her, for obvious reasons. You basically grew up with both of them, and you didn’t want to risk ruining the friendship the three of you shared. Haechan used to tease you all the time, and you used to hate him for it. As you got older, you got used to it. You can’t even remember when you started developing feelings for him, but you knew you were head over heels.

“I don’t know… I haven’t seen him since college, and now you want me to just live with him?”

“Oh, please, you’ll be fine! Besides, he’ll be more than happy to help you out since you’re going through a rough time right now.”

She had a point. He’s always been a good guy, and he wouldn’t say no, especially since you don’t have a place to live at the moment.

“You’re right. I just didn’t want to be a burden, you know?”

“You worry too much! I’m going to let him know you’ll be staying with him. He’ll probably call you after I talk to him, so heads up!”

“Okay, and thank you so much for this. I really appreciate it!”

She was pleased and hung up to call Haechan. You hadn’t spoken to him in years, and you started to realize what was about to happen. You were about to live with your best friend's brother, who also happened to be your childhood crush.

Your stomach churned with instant stress and nervousness. You started to panic, wondering what to say when he called and whether you might come off as annoying. You always overthink things when it comes to him. You began pacing back and forth in your now-empty apartment, waiting for his call. You had already put all your important belongings and furniture in a storage unit until you could find a new place.

Your phone rang, and you saw it was Haechan. You answered nervously.

“H-Hello?”

“Hey you, it’s been a while, huh?”

His voice sounded just like you remembered—soft-spoken and gentle.

“Yeah, it has! How have you—”

“We haven’t seen each other in years, and all of a sudden, you want to live with me. Don’t you think we’re moving a little too fast?”

You rolled your eyes at his comment, knowing that he was only saying that to tease you.

"Oh, shut up. You know I wouldn’t do this if I didn’t have to. I would’ve stayed with your sister, but you know what happened with that."

You heard him let out a sigh and stretch his body in the process.

"Yeah, every year she goes on these exotic trips with her boyfriend and goes MIA for a month. I was shocked that she even called me."

"Damn, she still calls me whenever she goes on her trips."

"Whatever. Anyway, I’m sorry to hear what happened with your job. You’re more than welcome to stay with me until you can get back on your feet and support yourself again."

"Oh, thank goodness. I thought you were going to leave me hanging for a second."

He let out a laugh and said, "What? No, I would never do that. What makes you think I would?"

"I don’t know. It’s just... we haven’t spoken or seen each other since college, and now here I am, begging you to let me stay with you."

He laughed again. You always loved the way he laughed—so carefree and happy. It gave you so much comfort.

"Ah, you’re killing me here. I’ve always loved how funny you are. Now, I’m on my way to you. Send me your address and I’ll pick you up."

"Dude, it’s almost midnight. Aren’t you tired?"

"Yeah, but your lease technically ends today, right? They’re going to be knocking at your door to leave anyway, so you might as well move in tonight."

He made a fair point. It would be best if you left now. You already had all your clothes and personal items with you, so you could just leave tonight if you wanted.

"Alright, come pick me up. I’m basically packed already!"

"Great! I’ll leave my place now. See you soon!"

You said your goodbyes and hung up the phone. You started to feel nervous about seeing Haechan after all this time. You realized all you were wearing was a loose tank top and some joggers, but you were too tired to even bother changing into something else.

20 minutes later...

You heard a knock at the door, and lo and behold, it was Haechan. He still looked the same, except he was a little taller than the last time you saw him. He wore a black hoodie with a baseball cap and sweatpants.

He looked so attractive.

Even now, in something as simple as a hoodie, you instantly felt yourself go insane seeing him like this. You noticed the sleepiness in his eyes—he had definitely lied earlier about not being tired. He just didn’t want you to feel bad for him.

You greeted each other with a simple hug, and as you did, you caught a whiff of his cologne. It had a warm, sweet, and woody scent with hints of spice and musk that lingered in the air. You wanted to hold onto him longer, but of course, you couldn’t.

As you let go, he asked what he could do to help. You told him to grab the box of miscellaneous items while you carried your clothes. You both made your way to his car, packed everything in, and after bringing down the last of your things, you climbed into the passenger seat. Every now and then, you glanced over at him, watching him drive. He looked so attractive doing something as simple as that.

You found everything he did attractive—even something as mundane as driving. The way he kept one hand on the steering wheel while leaning back in his seat made you press your thighs together. You wished, at this moment, that you could—

“Do you plan on staring at me the whole drive or what?”

You snapped out of your thoughts, realizing you'd been staring at him for a while.

“Oh, I’m sorry, just daydreaming is all.”

“Uh-huh... Anyways, we’re here now. I’m too tired to carry all your stuff up, so just grab what you need for tonight.”

You agreed, feeling sleepy yourself. You grabbed your night essentials and followed him up to his apartment. The space was sleek and minimal, with little to no decoration. He liked to keep things simple. He led you to the room where you'd be staying for the time being.

“This is where you’ll be staying. My best friend used to live here, but he moved in with his girlfriend, so it’s been empty since. Make yourself comfortable. I’ll be in my room if you need anything.”

You nodded, watching him leave before you got settled and began getting ready for bed. You left your tank top on and changed into pajama pants. After brushing your teeth, you returned to bed, only to realize how cold the room was. The one blanket he gave you wasn’t nearly enough.

You knew you couldn’t sleep through the night—it was just too cold. So, you knocked at his door. Haechan was sitting at his desktop, playing videos, but paused to look at you.

“What’s up?”

“Sorry to bother you, but the room is really cold, and the blanket you gave me isn’t enough. I was wondering if you had something else. I thought I brought my sweatshirt, but I couldn't find it.”

“Ah, I don’t think so... here, just take my hoodie for now—”

“No, I can’t. You’ll be cold for the night—”

“Nah, I’ll be fine. I’m used to it. My heater doesn’t work, and I was supposed to get it fixed this week, so I apologize for that.”

“You don’t have to apologize. I guess I’ll take your hoodie, but I’ll give it back as soon as I find mine.”

He agreed, standing up from his gaming chair to take off his hoodie. As he pulled it over his head, his shirt underneath rode up slightly, revealing a glimpse of his waist—and a newly grown happy trail.

It took everything in you not to lose your mind at that moment, but you managed to keep your fantasies in check. He handed you the hoodie, and you left his room, putting it on as you walked back to your temporary space.

As you lay down, the smell of his cologne clung to the fabric, distracting you. You couldn’t stop thinking about when he first picked you up—how you hugged, your bodies pressed together, and how you didn’t want to let go.

Feeling lightheaded from the thought, you pushed it aside. That was a worry for another day. For now, it was time to sleep. And tonight, you slept peacefully...

♡♡♡♡♡♡

As time passed, you and Haechan grew even closer. You noticed he had become more comfortable around you. At first, when you both sat in the living room, he kept his distance out of respect, but now, you were always near each other.

He had grown so comfortable that sometimes he’d walk around the house without a shirt on. It drove you mad when he did that—you could barely look him in the eye anymore because of it.

He walked out of his room wearing only black professional slacks and dress shoes, completely shirtless. He held two different dress shirts in his hand and asked for your opinion.

“Hey, I have that big interview today and I can’t decide whether to wear the black or white shirt. Which one do you think would be better?”

You were so captivated by his features that you couldn't even focus on what he was saying to you.

“Um, hello? Is there anyone in that pretty head of yours?”

You jumped at his compliment, feeling heated with embarrassment. He let out a slight chuckle, clearly amused by your reaction.

“S-sorry, I wasn’t paying attention. What was the question?” you asked, your voice tinged with nervousness.

“God, what am I going to do with you? I asked which shirt looks better for the interview.”

“I think the black one looks nice.”

He nodded and went back to his room to get dressed and prepare to leave. You felt flustered by the affection he’d been showing you lately. He had started using various nicknames for you like "love," "darling," and "pretty," and it was becoming overwhelming.

Being in a confined space with him all the time has made it worse. It’s so bad to the point where now whenever you masturbate you can only get off to the thought of him touching you. It’s a recurring thought that crosses your mind. This all started one day when you came home early from job hunting and wanted to hang out with Haechan. As you were approaching his room, you heard some noises coming from it.

Curious, you realized the sounds were his moans. The door was slightly ajar, and you could see him through the crack. His head was thrown back against the pillow, eyes closed, lost in pleasure. You were stunned and felt a wave of arousal.  You couldn’t bring yourself to stop watching him. You told yourself to walk away, reminding yourself that watching him like this was a serious invasion of his privacy.

 But this whole situation made you even more wet. 

You wanted to touch yourself while he did, but you knew you wouldn’t be able to keep yourself together. So you know what you do instead?

You recorded him on your phone to have this to look back on later. You felt so gross and guilty for even doing this, but everything happened too quickly, and you couldn't resist. He looked so good, and you didn’t want to forget any of it.  As he neared climax, you weren’t sure how much time you had before he noticed you, but fortunately, he didn't. He finished, spilling over his hands and sheets. 

You quickly stopped recording and quietly made your way back to your room, trying to act as if nothing had happened. You stayed hidden until you saw him leave for his evening walk. As soon as he was out of the apartment, you immediately went to touch yourself with the video you had just taken of him.

Ever since then, you could only get off by thinking of Haechan. No one else could come to mind. You couldn’t explain this insatiable desire you had for him, and it just kept getting worse. Sometimes, when he wasn’t looking, you’d sneak a picture or two of him while he was changing. You used those to get yourself off, too.

You had started to become such a pervert for him, and you hadn’t even realized it.

Fast forward to now. As he leaves the apartment for his interview, you finally have some much-needed alone time. He recently had to quit his old job to find a new one, and he’s been home all the time. It’s nice and all, but you haven’t been able to masturbate in forever. It’s the first time in a while that you’ve been able to cum. You knew today was going to be the day.

You do what you usually do: go into your room and use your vibrator. Before you lay down on your bed, you notice you left Haechan’s hoodie, which he lent you when you moved here. You place your sex toys on the bed and go to grab his hoodie. You don’t know what possessed you, but you begin to press it against your face and realize you can still smell his cologne.

You start to think back to how he would walk around the house with that cologne. You couldn’t stop smelling it and thinking about him being with you right now. You wished he would wrap his arms around you and pull you close. You lay back down on your bed and start to touch yourself, pulling your panties to the side and rubbing against your clit while keeping his hoodie pressed against your face.

You don’t know why you lose all self-control when it comes to him. You felt like you wanted more, and just his hoodie wouldn’t be enough. Then you came up with one of the most perverted ideas yet.

To go jerk off in his bed instead.

His room would be the perfect place, as it would automatically smell like him. You felt disgusted for even thinking about it, but you did it anyway. It wouldn’t take long for you to finish at the rate you were going. You grabbed all your stuff and headed straight to his room. You immediately started to feel light-headed from the strong cologne in his room. It made sense since he had been there not too long ago.

You jumped into his bed, and even the sheets smelled like him. You placed your vibrator on his bedside table, waiting to use it when the moment was right. You went back to touching yourself, throwing your head back in pleasure. You felt a sense of bliss just being in his room. You knew you shouldn’t be there, and he would probably kick you out if he found you touching yourself in his bed. But you were at the point where you didn’t care; you were just chasing your orgasm. You started thinking about that one time you caught him touching himself in this exact bed that you were now using for yourself.

You came up with another idea.

You quickly grabbed your phone and started playing the video you recorded of him jerking off. You only use it for yourself on special occasions, and this was one of them. Lost in your own pleasure, you closed your eyes and listened to his moans. You imagined him right next to you, touching himself with you. You grabbed your vibrator from his bedside table and turned it on. Pulling your panties to the side, you pressed it against your clit. 

You moaned out loud, the sound almost like a scream. Tears started to form in your eyes as you threw your head back with pleasure. You felt so alive and didn’t even care about the consequences. You even moaned his name, unable to stop yourself.

You had come to accept that you were indeed a pervert for him…

So deep in your sinful endeavors, you failed to notice that Haechan was watching you with his arms crossed as he leaned against the doorframe.

“It was only a matter of time before I caught you doing something like this,” he said.

You immediately stopped what you were doing and were too stunned to move. All you could do was turn off your vibrator and look at him. Words couldn’t even describe how humiliating this was for you.

Being seen in his room made everything so much worse.

“Oh, don’t stop on my account, love. You seem to be really enjoying yourself in my bed of all places.”

You wanted to die in that moment. You had never felt so ashamed in your life.

“It’s not what it looks like—”

“Oh, don’t start with that shit.”

He walked over to you, and you tried to close your legs. But he stopped you with his knee and grasped your chin, tilting your face up to meet his gaze.

“These walls aren’t that thick, darling, and I can hear you every time you touch that pretty cunt of yours.”

He started to slowly place his fingertips against your clit. You instantly began to melt and whimper at his touch.

“Every time you do it, I always hear you moan and beg for me to touch you.”

He inserts a finger into your squelching pussy and rubs his thumb against your clit, maintaining a slow but steady pace. The look on his face sends shivers down your spine. You can’t even bring yourself to look at him, especially with the state he has you in right now.

“Don’t even get me started on the night you watched me jerk off. God, sweetheart, have you ever heard of the word “privacy”?”

You didn’t realize your phone was still beside you, with the video paused on the screen. Hoping he doesn’t notice, you try to slide your hand towards it and push it under the pillow beside you. However, he beats you to it. With his other hand, he grabs your wrist to stop you from reaching for your phone. He then grabs your phone and sees that you recorded him.

“You even fucking recorded me. God, you’re so pathetic.”

You feel yourself tighten at his degrading words, and he notices.

“Aww, you like the way I’m talking to you. Did you use this video of me to jerk off just now?”

You’re too embarrassed to admit it out loud, so all you can do is nod your head. He kneels to face you and makes direct eye contact. With a low, sultry tone, he says:

“You really are such a little pervert for me, huh?”

You don’t know why, but when he calls you that, you instantly want to cum right then and there. You’re shocked that he’s even giving in to your perversion. You let out a moan and instantly regret it because he starts to laugh at you.

“Wow, you must really like it when I call you that. I won’t give you what you want, though, so you’re going to have to earn it.”

You hate how much he’s enjoying this right now. You decide enough is enough and speak up.

“W-why are you doing this? Aren’t you going to kick me out?”

He lets out a smirk, grabs your chin once more, and says:

“Why would I do that when I’m just starting to have so much fun with you?”

The way he says it is genuine, and he doesn’t want to stop any of this. You can’t believe that this is real and not one of the fantasies you dream about.

You bite your lip at his comment and can’t even think of a response.

“Now it’s time for you to pay for all the things you did behind my back. I want you to get on your knees for me.”

You were a little taken aback by his forwardness and didn’t know how to react. He positioned himself at the edge of the bed with his back facing you.

“I won’t repeat myself again. Get on your knees in front of me now.”

You quickly obeyed his demands, got onto the floor, and made your way towards him. You knelt in front of him, feeling intimidated. He was still wearing the dress shirt and pants from his interview, looking so attractive. He had left a few buttons undone at the top of his shirt, revealing a hint of his chest. You pressed your thighs together to try to compose yourself, but he was only turning you on. Unable to meet his gaze, you looked down at the floor. He then grabbed your jaw with his hand aggressively and forced you to look at him.

“You better keep your eyes on me the whole time if you know what’s good for you.”

His tone was scary and harsh. You kept your eyes locked on him as he released his grip on your jaw.

“I want you to take off your shirt.”

You felt a little flustered by his sudden demand, but the way he was looking at you sent goosebumps all over your body, and you didn’t want to upset him. You lifted your shirt, standing there half-naked in front of him, with nothing on but your panties.

“Of course, you're not wearing a bra.”

With one hand, he groped your tits, twisting the nipple of the other. You let out a loud whimper in response.

“Who would’ve known I’ve been living with such a slut this whole time?”

You threw your head back in bliss, loving the way he was touching you.

“You think I haven’t noticed you walking around the house with no bra, your nipples showing through those tight tank tops you always wear?  If you ask me, it’s like you’re begging for this to happen, love.”

He squeezed your boob harder, and all you could do was moan. You had to admit, you stopped wearing a bra at home, hoping he’d notice you. 

“It’s embarrassing to see you trying so hard to get my attention.” His cold, harsh words only heightened your arousal.

He eventually stopped, then unbuckled his belt and unzipped his pants. You could see the bulge in his boxers. When he took out his cock, it slapped directly onto your face, making you flinch.

“Oh, sorry about that, sweetie. I guess I got a bit carried away.”

You told him it was fine and that you didn’t mind. You started to lick your lips and were about to use your hands to wrap around his dick, but he stopped you.

“Did I say that you could touch me? Remember, you have to earn it.”

He shoved his cock back into his boxers. You didn’t like how much he was teasing you, and you started to get irritated, but you were still glad that any of this was happening.

“So what do you want me to do for you then?”

“I want you to hump my shoe.”

There he goes, trying to humiliate you again. You were surprised by his request. You were already feeling embarrassed, and now he seemed to enjoy seeing you like this.

“I-I don’t think I can do—”

“Don’t get all shy on me now, darling. Just a second ago, you were spread open on my bed, ready to get off to me, and now here I am giving you what you want, and you want to back out. Maybe you’re not as much of a pervert as I thought you were.” 

There goes that trigger word of yours.

You instantly felt your body heat up all over, and you decided to sit on his dress shoe. You began to hump against him back and forth, and Haechan couldn’t believe that you were actually doing this. At first, he was just teasing you to see how far you’d go for him, but he never expected to see you act like this because of him.

This was really stroking his ego, knowing that you were this obsessed with him. He started to rub the bulge forming in his boxers and kept eye contact with you the whole time.

You were humping yourself at a steady pace and didn’t want to get too carried away. The friction of your clit against him was driving you crazy. You couldn’t believe that you had fallen this hard for him. Just a month ago, you had an innocent little crush on him that had now turned into an unhealthy, perverted obsession. 

You were enjoying every second of this.

You started to moan from how good you felt. He would lift his foot every once in a while just to mess with you, adding more to your stimulation. He had the biggest smirk on his face and enjoyed every second of this. You wrapped your arms around his leg for support. As your boobs pressed against him, he felt an intense urge to cum right then and there. It was getting harder for you to hold back, so you rested your head on his thigh as he gently patted your head.

“Mhm, you’re so pretty like this, love. Please don’t stop for me.”

This all felt like a dream to you.

You whimpered at his praise and continued to keep up the pace without stopping.

You saw him notice the mirror facing his bed and could tell he had an idea. He proceeded to grab his phone from his pocket and started to record you and your backside, which was facing the mirror.

He began to bounce his leg up and down, adding more to your stimulation. You threw your head back in pleasure and let out a sinful scream. You started to breathe heavily, and your vision was becoming blurry.

“Mhm, look at the camera for me, love. Show me how much of a slut you are.”

All this humiliation was really affecting you. The fact that he was recording you meant he would surely bring it up and tease you about it forever. You avoided looking at the camera and looked down.

Haechan didn’t like that.

With his free hand, he grabbed your jaw and forced you to look directly at his phone.

“Don’t act like you don’t like this. You were so eager just a second ago to do this, and now you can’t even look at me. It’s pathetic, really.”

You let out a low moan at his degrading words. He knows how much you love being treated like this. He pointed the camera at the mirror, revealing just how much you were enjoying this.

“God, I can’t wait to get off with this later.”

You start to tense up at his words, feeling yourself getting closer to the edge. You don’t know how long you could last if he keeps talking about you in such a vulgar manner.

“Mhm, you’d love that, huh sweetheart? Me getting off just from the thought of you. You love all this attention I’m giving you. I bet you’ve been waiting for this for a long time.”

All you could do was nod in response. Sensing that you were getting close, he didn’t want you to cum just yet. He stopped recording and said,

“Okay, I want you to stop now.”

You were so into it that you didn’t even realize he was talking to you. He was starting to get annoyed by how many times he had to call your name for you to stop what you were doing. Eventually, he had enough and yanked your hair, making you look up at him.

“Don’t you hear me telling you to stop?”

You snapped back into reality and realized that he was talking to you.

“Oh, I-I’m so sorry, I didn’t—”

Still gripping your hair, he dragged you across the room and pressed you up against the wall, standing in front of you while you knelt on the floor. As you looked up at him, you began to feel even more intimidated than before. The angry and disgusted look on his face sent shivers down your spine.

“Don’t give me that excuse. You’re such a little slut and couldn’t help yourself. But remember, I’m the one allowing all of this and giving you permission.”

He released your hair and began to unzip his pants, letting his cock fall onto your face. He patronized you by lightly slapping your face with it.

“I could stop all this right now and leave you here—”

“P-please d-don’t do that… I need you so bad.”

He likes how desperate you were becoming for him, a huge smirk spreading across his face.

“Mhm, I love it when you beg for me. Now be a good girl and stay still.”

Confused about why he wanted you to stay still, you were suddenly surprised when he began to slowly push his pulsing cock down your throat. You tried to protest, but he simply said, 

“You shouldn’t talk with your mouth full—”

He immediately shoved his entire length down your throat and threw his head back. 

“It’s rude, love.”

He began to face-fuck you against the wall. Tears streamed down your face as you closed your eyes. He aggressively fucked your mouth, relishing the sensation of your throat wrapping around him so tightly.

You were about to reach down and touch yourself, but he quickly stopped you and pinned both of your hands above you. You felt trapped underneath him with nowhere to run or hide, though you didn’t want to escape anyway.

“This isn’t for your pleasure anymore. I’m doing this for my own.”

You moaned around him at his words, and he noticed.

“You love that I’m just using you now? You really are such a pervert.”

Your eyes began to roll back, reaching your breaking point. With so much happening, you felt yourself gasping for air, feeling like you were fading. As he neared climax, you tasted his pre-cum. Just before he came, he pulled out of your mouth. You coughed and heavily breathed, feeling even more lightheaded than before.

“Haechan, I don’t think I can do this—”

“Oh, I’m not done with you, pretty girl.”

He grabbed you by the hair and threw you onto his bed. Removing his shirt and the rest of his clothes, he made sure that both of you were facing the mirror. He pushed your face down and angled your ass into the air. Without hesitation, he shoved his dick into your aching pussy. You let out a moan that was practically a scream.

You looked directly into the mirror, seeing how rough he was being with you. He was starting to lose himself in you. He didn’t know what possessed him to fuck you like this, but he began to enjoy how amazing your pussy felt. You started to grip the sheets on his bed and said,

“P-please don’t stop, Hyuck.”

It was rare for you to call him that, but whenever you did, he absolutely loved it.

“Aww my little pervert starting to become more desperate for me-“

He let out a loud smack against your ass and you shriek in pleasure. He pulled on your hair and whispered into your ear

“You’re absolutely fucking gross for being turned on by this.”

You loved how all your fantasies about him were coming to life. You had always imagined him fucking you hard and deep into his mattress. In this blissful state, your eyes rolled back as your moans became more breathless and ragged. Driven by desire, you aggressively fucked yourself back onto his cock, moving so passionately that he fell back onto the bed, and you rode him.

You were in such a horny state that you couldn’t stop yourself. He wasn’t complaining about how needy you were; in fact, seeing you so desperate turned him on even more. The fact that he was witnessing this raw side of you made him want to come even harder.

“God, baby, you can slow down, you know… I’m going to cum if you keep going like this.”

“F-fuck, I can’t. I wanted this… I’ve wanted you for so long, and I-I can’t hold back anymore.”

His dick twitched in response, and you felt it. You let out a loud whimper and threw your head back. You leaned your back against his bare chest and grabbed your legs, pumping his cock vigorously inside your core. You were practically screaming, not caring if his neighbors heard your moans.

By the end of the night, everyone would know who you belonged to.

“Hyuck, I’m getting close—”

“Mhmm, is that so, baby?”

He swiftly changed positions, now pressing your back against the bed with him on top. He pulled out, and you whined in agony from the emptiness. He laughed, enjoying how needy you were for him.

“God, you’re so cute. I almost don’t want to go back inside.”

“P-please, Hyuck… I want to cum so bad.”

He glanced at the other side of the bed and noticed your vibrator still there. An idea struck him. As he slowly inserted his cock back inside you, he turned on the vibrator and placed it against your clit. You arched your back in pleasure, begging him to bury himself deeper inside you.

He complied, thrusting his cock back into your squelching pussy with relentless force. His strokes were hard and sloppy. He set the vibrator to a faster setting and you wrapped your legs around his waist. Your cunt was so wet from the overstimulation that you began to make a mess all over him and the bedsheets. You wrapped your arms around his neck and buried your face in the scent of his cologne. It reminded you of all the times you hugged him, and you didn’t want to let go.

He kissed and bit all over your neck, and you moaned out in sheer pleasure.

“F-fuck, keep doing that.”

You felt him smirk against your neck as he continued. He moved away from your neck and began to kiss you on the lips. Both of you closed your eyes, lost in the gratification you were giving each other. He realized he was hitting your sweet spot, and you started to yell out in ecstasy. He set the vibrator to the highest setting. Tears welled up in your eyes from the overwhelming pleasure he was giving you. Both of you were on the edge, unable to last much longer.

“Are you close, darling?”

You nodded in response.

He leaned down to your ear and whispered in a deep, husky tone, “Then come for me like the dirty little pervert you are.”

That was the breaking point for you. You moaned louder than ever that night and came incredibly hard on his cock. He followed suit, filling you up with ropes of his cum. He turned off your vibrator and, without pulling out, placed you on top of him once again and let you rest on his chest.

Both of you were breathing heavily, trying to calm down after everything that had happened. You were practically seeing stars, still in disbelief that this was real. He gently stroked your back and asked, “Are you okay? How are you feeling?”

“To be honest, this was the hardest I’ve ever come. This is the best sex I’ve had in a very long time.”

You immediately regretted saying that, realizing it gave him a huge boost to his ego. He had the biggest smirk on his face.

“Oh really? I will admit I am pretty good, aren’t I? Especially the part when—”

“On second thought, I take it back. It was terrible.”

You both laughed, and he pretended to be offended. Even now, you could lighten up after everything that had transpired between you.

“You weren’t saying that when you were riding my dick.”

There he goes again, making you feel all embarrassed. You hated how much of a chokehold he had on you.

“Whatever.”

He lowered both of his hands to your hips and gripped them tightly.

“A thank you would be nice, you know?”

You rolled your eyes and said, “Fine, thank you. I’m surprised you still want to be my friend after this—”

“Friend?” He said with a distasteful tone, almost as if he were annoyed.

“Honey, after all that happened, I think we're past just being friends.”

Your face started to heat up as you wondered what he meant by that.

“So what are we then?”

“That, I don’t know. But I’m willing to explore and find out with you.”

“So you have feelings for me?”

“I mean, duh. My dick is deep inside you right now, and I don’t do that for just anybody, you know?”

Even in a heartfelt moment, he had to make everything so sexual. You started to wonder if you were the only pervert here.

“But in all seriousness, I’ve always liked you. I just didn’t want to tell you. Plus, my sister would freak out knowing I made a move on you.”

You completely forgot about your best friend.

“Eh, I’ll just tell her I confessed to you and you liked me back. What can she do then?”

You had a point. Besides, your best friend would trust Haechan to be a good boyfriend to you.

“You’re so right. Also, who would’ve known that you were secretly a little pervert for me this whole time,”  he said with a condescending look on his face.

You shuddered at the word.

“Please don’t call me that… it’s embarrassing.”

He laughed at how flustered you were. He noticed he was still inside you and slowly pulled out. Both of your mixed fluids began to seep into his sheets, and he loved it. You rested your head on his chest again, and he patted your head like before.

“Aww, but I love calling you that. You look so adorable.”

“You’re evil, you know?”

“And you love it.”

You hated that he was right. You both spent the night cuddling and enjoying each other's comfort. Eventually, you got a job and decided to live with Haechan since you were now dating. You told his sister about the relationship, and she obviously supported it. You still couldn’t believe that he felt the same way about you after all this time. 

Even after everything that has happened, you would always be a pervert when it came to him…

[evie-sturns]

dent - Matt Sturniolo

summary: you accidentally dent matt's car after taking it to work, when you give matt the news he doesn't comfort you, quite the opposite actually resulting in an argument. he finds a good way to make it up to you after he realises he overreacted.

contains: angst, arguing, crying, yelling, slight panic attack, smut, fingering, matt the munch, fluff.

----------------------.·:*¨¨* ≈☆≈ *¨¨*:·.-------------------

I walk out of my office into the cold hair which hits my bare skin harshly, I tug down my mini dress with a sigh as i approach my boyfriend, matt's, car. he let me borrow it for work today due to the fact my cars in the repair shop.

I swing open the door to his car, flopping down into the drivers seat and instantly turning on the heating. I drive forward a couple meters before realising i left my phone in the office

"shit" i mumble, slamming on the brakes and swinging open my door.

It hits the pole which i pulled up next to, "oh my fuck-" i gasp, "no- no" i repeat before jumping out of my car, looking at the door. It has a reasonably large dent in it now.

"no, no no no.." i throw my head into my hands, i decide to grab my phone then deal with this situation.

my heels click against the concrete as i sprint towards the front door of the office,

I swiftly run into the elevator and press level 6, my finger shaking. "what do I even say to matt!" I mumble to myself.

the elevator door opens with a ding and i make my way towards my room, I pull out my keys and unlock the door, walking back in and swiping my phone off of the desk. I run back towards the elevator and pile in with one of my coworkers.

"You 'goin lobby?" she asks, I nod with a forced smile as i fix my hair in the mirror. The door to the elevator opens, I speed-walk out and out the building towards matt's car.

I start to instantly feel guilty as i look at the door on the drivers side again, I open the door more carefully this time and jump in, I turn on the car and pull out of the parking spot,

my hands grip the wheel as panic flushes over me, "matt will understand, i'm sure."

-

after parking the car in the driveway I walk up the front porch, I knock twice on the door as I feel my eyes water slightly, I push back my tears with a deep breath.

Matt opens the door with a tired smile, "hey sweetheart! how was work?" he breathes out, I walk inside with a shaky breath, folding my arms over my stomach.

"matt.. i need to tell you something" i say, looking up at him with my bottom lip trembling.

"yeah!? anything- are you okay?" he says with a concerned look on his face.

"i- i um" i take a deep breath before continuing "i accidentally opened the car door into a pole- like really hard and now theres a big dent" i squeeze out, my voice breaking halfway through

"you what?" he raises his voice "let me see it?"

i nod, walking back outside towards the car, matt follows close behind me. he takes one look at the door and instantly turns around, throwing his hands up

"of course you fucking did!" matt raises his voice, walking back inside

"matt i'm sorry-" i start but matt cuts me off "i dont wanna hear it- i dont wanna hear your voice,"

my eyebrows twist "matt what? i'm gonna pay for that you know that" i say, slightly louder, following matt inside

"no- how the fuck are you that blind? how do you slam the car into a pole that big? are you fucking stupid!" matt yells, looking at me directly in the eyes.

my lips part in shock, "you can't speak to me like that matt! it was an accident" i argue back, matt scoffs.

"you're so fucking clueless."

i feel my eyes water, "why don't you do anything right?" he groans loudly.

i burst into sobs, "don't say that" i whisper, taking in sharp panicked breaths.

"i'll say what i want!? you can tell me what to say and what not to when you grow a fucking conscious!"

and with that i go to walk down the corridor past matt, already embarrassed from crying. he grabs my wrist tugging me back towards him. i gasp with an ugly sob

"look at me." matt growls, i shake my head looking down at my feet.

"look at me!" he raises his voice, "fine!" i yell, looking up at him.

"if my car. isn't fixed by tomorrow evening. we're going to have a problem y/n." matt says blankly.

"i know- let me go!" i whine, he releases his grip and i run towards matt and i's bedroom, slamming the door shut behind me.

i hear matt mutter something about me being pathetic through the door

“stop being so mean matt!” i yell in a bratty way, i feel my breathing get shallow, my body gradually heating up

my sobs never slow, in fact they get worse the more that the argument we just hand sinks into me. the whole house is now silent aside from matt and i’s room where i’m struggling to breathe

i sink down onto the floor against the wall as i bury my face in my knees, i take in shaky attempts of breathes as i cry into the fabric of my pants.

I pick up my phone and email matt’s insurance company, informing them on what just happened to his car. My hands shake against the keyboard, as soon as i press send i’m up off the floor and in my closet, tearing off my minidress and changing into one of matt’s shirts.

——

I’ve been laying in bed for about an hour now, just now realising that i haven’t ate since mid day and now it’s 9pm, i’ve finally calmed myself down after what happened earlier

matt won’t be in the kitchen i’m sure, i hoist myself up off of bed and walk into the corridor. I feel myself get nervous, i don’t want to get upset again.

as i reach the end of the corridor i enter the kitchen, matt sitting at the dining table on his phone with a plate of dinner infront of him,

it’s okay.

if i don’t look at him i’ll be fine.

i can see out of the side of vision matt looking up at me, i open the pantry.

matt clears his throat before starting, “I made you dinner aswell.. it- it’s in the fridge and there’s muffins in there too.” matt says softly, his voice is quiet, like if he gets any louder i’ll disappear.

i don’t respond, i don’t have to respond to anything he does after how he treated me earlier.

i open the fridge to see a plate of pasta in the fridge, topped with a stupid green leaf on top which matt ‘only does for special occasions’, i remember him telling me and we laughed about it for hours.

along side there’s a couple of muffins which have a poor attempt of being iced, a dollop of icing ontop of each one with some strategically placed sprinkles.

i take the two plates as i keep my lips pressed into a line, i walk back down the corridor into our room and shut the door behind me with a loud sigh.

i have to admit, it was sweet what he had made, he’s always had a weird love for cooking for me no matter how bad he was at it, i think it was because of the amount of enthusiasm i gave him every time he presented it to me.

i sit down at matt’s desk, my feet up on the chair as i take a small bite. I didn’t really have an appetite but i was hungry, and this was nice.

after devouring the muffins i was feeling better, it was now 9:30pm and I decided that i needed to have my hour on my phone in bed before i sleep. I leave the dishes in a neat pile on the desk.

usually i would take them into the kitchen but i didn’t want to see matt, i knew i would cry this time.

I flop down into matt and i’s bed, it feels empty without him. We’ve slept in the same bed every night of our relationship and it’s the only way i can sleep.

—-

10:23pm

knock knock

i hear soft knocking on the door, i choose to ignore it.

knock knock

again, followed by the door clicking open. i’m practically buried under the duvet, only my hair visible so i keep my eyes infront of me at my phone.

i hear matt’s footsteps get closer to the bed, from the small gap out of the duvet i see his jeans by the bed.

i think he’s trying to figure out if i’m awake or not.

I let out a deep sigh and tug the duvet up higher. Matt takes in a shaking breath as he looks down at me.

“can— may i sit down next to you? i want to talk” matt whispers.

may i? on normal days i would laugh at that, it’s so formal.

if i don’t agree we won’t talk this out, meaning that i won’t get any closure for longer. I nod my head slightly. matt climbs into bed beside me, the weight shifting to his side as he sits uncomfortably

he doesn’t waste time to start talking

“I’m so sorry- i’m so embarrassed about everything i said, i didn’t mean it.” matt’s voice trembles.

“do you want to come out of there- I want to see you.” matt whispers, tapping my shoulder lightly though the blanket.

i pull down the duvet and sit up against the duvet next to matt, i look up at him briefly. he looks distraught

his eyes are puffy and red, his nose red and eyes glossy.

he looks at me and i see guilt wash over him.

“i love you so much— i don’t want to loose what we have over a dent in my car.” matt says calmly,

“i said things that i’m really really not proud of.. at all. i didn’t even know what i was saying.. my mouth was spitting out shit faster than i could process.”

“i’m not even sure what i was saying.” matt sighs

“you- you’re mad at me though” i whisper

“i’m not mad at you princess, i’ve never been mad at you i promise. i just freaked out over something minor” matt says, reaching down and interlocking our fingers as a single tear falls from his eyes, i reach up and wipe it quickly.

“you don’t have to forgive me, i’m not expecting you to. but if you want- i could make it up to you..? or not i don’t know- i could go sleep in the spare bedroom if you need time alone i mean, but i’m so sorry.” he rambles

“make it up to me?” i whisper, “like how?” i ask with a sniff.

“you know…” matt hints “the thing that you like a lot from me?”

i nod, sinking my top teeth into my bottom lip.

“i’m sorry for making you cry sweetheart,” matt says, wiping my face with his cold hands.

“i’m fine- it’s okay.” i give matt a small smile.

he nods understandably before sitting up, he walks over to the edge of the bed beside me and lightly grips my ankles, spinning me round so my legs dangle off the edge of the bed

Matt kneels on the floor between my legs “can i take these off?” he asks softly, referring to the lace panties underneath matt’s shirt that i threw on earlier

i nod quickly, “words please” matt smiles, “yes- yes you can please” i spit out.

“there she is” matt says, hooking his fingers over the waistband and tugging them down to my ankles.

he doesn’t waste time to wrap his arms under my thighs, holding my lower back lightly to keep me up in the sitting position. “this okay?” he breathes, “yes!” i reply instantly, feeling the heat between my legs grow.

matt starts to press small pecks to the insides of my thighs, kissing around where i need him the most.

embarrassingly, i let out a soft whimper from the little amount of touch.

matt loves to eat me out, i’m not sure why but he goes all out like it’s his last meal. he says it’s because it makes me feel so good which i find cute.

“so pretty” matt says from between my thighs, he finally attaches his mouth to my clit,

“oh my god-“ i moan, intertwining my fingers on one hand into his brunette hair and placing my other hand behind me, feeling myself grow weak already.

matt removes one hand from under my thigh, letting it fall onto the bed, he reaches under his chin and slowly dips his middle finger into my hole, curling it up slightly “matt!” i whine, bucking my hips up into his mouth

he adds his other finger aswell, the cold metal of his rings against the warmth of me making my eyes roll back.

i grip his hair tighter as matt repeatedly curls his finger “how- how are you so good at this” i breathe out

matt laughs lightly, the vibrations earning a squeal from me.

“fuck fuck-“ i whimper, feeling myself get close.

matt swirls his tongue around my clit,

and with that my legs clench around his head and i finish

i feel myself release on matt’s fingers, my legs shake around his head as he pulls his mouth off of me, being careful to not overstimulate me.

i collapse down on the matress behind me, attempting to catch my breath as i let go of matt’s hair.

matt smiles stupidly at me, his lips glistening. he picks me up off the bed, holding me by my ass. he pecks kisses down my neck.

“thank you.” i sigh, burying my face into his neck.

“don’t thank me.” matt laughs, carrying me into the living room and flopping down on the couch, i lay on his body.

“matt?” i ask quietly

“yeah pretty?” he reply’s, his fingers tracing mindless shapes on my back.

“you know i love you.” i say into his shirt “i love you more.” matt smiles

“and your rings- please don’t ever take them off.” i laugh.

“whys that?” matt teases,

“they feel so good.” i mutter out, barely audible.

“is that so?” matt grins, “yes- yeah” my cheeks flush

matt chuckles slightly, shifting me up and down on his chest.

“you know the muffins you made that were in the fridge?” i start up a new conversation

“yeah?” matt smiles, “what the fuck was going on with the icing- i mean they were really good but the icing was… special!” i burst out laughing

matt laughs with me before replying

“i actually don’t know- i don’t think bakings for me. i put the icing on and it like melted into the cupcake”

i scoff, “it’s okay baby, they were so cute”

——————

@luanetaluenta @sturnsssbow @mattfangirl @luvr4miya @luvtay111 @lolasturniolo @freshloveforthefit @ruedowney @lovingchrissposts @333michelle @h3arts4harry @sonicmacks @jamiesturniolo @chrisstopherfilmed @itzdarling @sturniolo-simp4life @daddyslilchickenfingers2 @recklessmatt @ev3rgreenxtrees @lovergirl4387 @certifiednatelover @solarsturniolo @mattsenthusiast @yomamaslays4lyfe @peachmels @alinaa131 @pepsiluvr0209 @creamoncreamoncream2 @szobofc @mattscoquette @blahbell668 @sturniolo04 @pkfferroo @bitchydragonparadise @thematthewlover @sturni0l0 @ratatioulle

[woso-dreamzzz]

Injured (Alexia's Version) VII

Alexia Putellas x Child!Reader

Summary: You get sick again

For matches that aren't important and are played outside of Spain, you don't go with Mami.

You spend time with Olga and Jaume at home and watch Alexia on the tv.

Currently, she's in Germany for a friendly. It had been a good match, a draw that helped the staff work out rotations and different on-pitch chemistry between players.

Now though, Alexia has dipped out of dinner early to give her family a call.

Olga picks up, obviously. It's late in Spain but still a little too early for Olga to be dressed in her pyjamas.

"Hi," Alexia says," How are you? How are the kids?"

Olga gives her a little tight lipped smile. "We've got the case of the sniffles today."

The camera flips to display you and your brother.

Jaume has gotten older now and is developing at an alarming rate to Alexia. You hadn't hit your milestones for ages while Jaume seems to be hitting all of his early.

He's sitting up by himself and babbling and trying to crawl now and Alexia hates how quickly he's growing up.

He's in his pyjamas too, one of your very old train-patterned onesies, and he's sitting right next to you as you run one of your electric trains around the track.

Your hair is messy and sticking upright and your nose is all red and you keep sniffing and wiping at it.

Alexia's eyes dart to Jaume and she notices the red flush to his cheeks.

He sneezes suddenly and it seems to spark you into your own round of sneezes.

Something in Alexia's stomach curdles and she sits upright in bed.

"How bad is it? Are they okay? Have you taken them to the hospital yet?"

Flashes come to Alexia's mind, of that horrible time when you both had meningitis and all the horror that came with it.

"It's just the sniffles," Olga assures her but the swirling of her stomach doesn't stop," And some sore throats. They've had some medicine and we've been having a pj day today."

"I'll come home," Alexia says. She props her phone up on the table and starts packing. She doesn't even fold her clothes, just callously throwing them back into her suitcase.

"Alexia...We're fine here, I promise."

"No." Panic creeps into Alexia's body now, coursing through her veins like adrenaline. "No, I'll come home. It's fine. You can't be expected to take care of two sick kids at once and-"

"Olga?"

Your sweet voice on the phone cuts Alexia off and she falls silent.

"Yes, sweetheart?"

"My head hurts."

"Oh, I'm sorry, bambi."

The phone moves until it's propped up on something and Alexia is greeted by the sight of Olga sitting down on the floor, pulling you into her lap.

Her hand immediately goes to check your temperature.

"We've got another hour before I can give you some more medicine," She says," Do you think you can last until them?"

You nod, picking up your controller and making your train whizz around the track again.

Jaume cocks his head to the side, looking between you and Olga before he bum shuffles even closer and attempts to clamber into your lap like you're sitting in Olga's.

It's a sweet scene and Alexia would have loved to coo over it had she not been racked with guilt at leaving while two sickly children were still at home.

She can't even understand how Irene leaves Mateo like this and he was more prone to illness than you and Jaume ever were.

The call lasts for hours and Alexia remains mostly silent.

You get to hold the phone while Olga takes Jaume to bed and you look at the screen with Alexia's face on it with a little frown.

"When are you coming home, Mami?"

You sound so hopeful that Alexia almost bursts into tears that instant, already feeling her throat closing up slightly.

She pushes through the feeling though and replies," Soon, bambi. I'm going to get on a flight as soon as it's your bedtime and I should be home by the time that you wake up."

You sniff though it only serves to make your nose feel even more stuffy. "Mami," You say," Are me and Jaume gonna have to go to hospital? I don't want to see the mean man again."

"No, bambi," Alexia assures you," You're not going to see the mean man. It's just the sniffles. You take your medicine and you'll be completely fine."

"Promise?"

"I promise."

Despite Olga's words, Alexia makes her excuses to the staff and gets the first flight back to Barcelona.

It's dark when she gets home and she orders a taxi to bring her right to the doorstep. She fiddles with her keys for a bit, completely missing the keyhole multiple times in her haste to get in.

Jaume's bedroom is first on her way up the stairs so Alexia dips into his room to check on him. He's peacefully asleep, cuddled up with one of the stuffed trains you gave him a few weeks ago.

His cheeks are still a little red and his nose is definitely blocked but apart from that he looks healthy enough and Alexia heads straight into your room.

It's dark so she picks her way through it carefully only to find that you're not in your bed.

You're sick and not in your bed.

Blind panic settles under Alexia's skin as she looks around wildly, tripping over your train track in her hurry to wrench open your wardrobe door.

You're not there either and Alexia stubs her toe as she forces your door open to burst into her own room, intent on telling Olga that someone's broken in and kidnapped you.

"Alexia?" Olga's wide awake, sitting up in bed with a book. "What is it?"

You're lying next to her, fast asleep though you look a tad distressed. Your hand is tight around the fabric of Olga's shirt and you're breathing heavily out of your mouth because your nose is all stuffed up.

"I came home," Alexia says.

"I know," Olga replies," I waited up."

"I checked on Jaume. He looks better."

"He is. They both are. Little miss just needed someone to sleep next to tonight. She was scared the doctor was coming to take her."

Alexia changes quickly, slipping into bed on your other side and curling around you.

"And you swear it's just the sniffles?"

"Just the sniffles," Olga says," They'll be good in a few days."

And you are.

Though Alexia hovers incessantly for almost a week afterwards.

[mustainegf]

𝐍𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐑𝐎𝐑𝐒 ¹⁹⁸⁶

Over the last few weeks, I had started to notice cracks in James’ tough layer. It had started with small things at first, the sudden worry in his eyes, the moments when he kinda seemed far away. I'd asked him about it, of course, but he'd always dismissed me, telling me that he was tired or feeling the pressure from the band.

Then the nightmares started.

It was shortly after 2 AM when I awoke to James tossing and turning next to me. At first, I assumed he was just trying to turn over, but when I turned towards him, I could see how his face was contorted in horror.

His eyes were shut, his brow knotted in almost pain as his hands squeezed the bedclothes running through his fingers, gripping them white knuckled.

"James," I softly said, trying to touch his shoulder. "James, wake up."

But he didn't wake. Instead, his breathing quickened, a strangled sound escaping his lips as he twisted beneath the covers.

I shook him harder, trying to drag him free from whatever nightmare had him in its grip.

"James!" I shook louder, hoping to break through.

Then his eyes flew open, wild and terrified. He was up in a snap, gasping like he was drowning. His hands flew up to the headboard as he tried to reorient himself.

"James, it's okay. You’re safe." I told him, trying to keep my voice very calm, even though my heart was practically in my throat. I put a hand onto his back. "It was just a nightmare."

But he wasn't hearing me. He still breathed superficially, with a tremendous effort.

It seemed it was more than a bad dream, he was in full blown panic mode, his eyes darting around the room looking for an escape.

"James, look at me," I whispered sharply, shifting across so that I now sat in front of him so he couldn't avoid my eyes. "You're here with me. It was just a dream."

That's when he finally looked at me, really looked me in the eyes, but they were filled with a fear I'd never seen before. It broke my heart.

“I… I can't… breathe," he choked, his voice quivering.

"You can. You're okay," I'd try to reassure him, hands cupping his cheeks as my thumbs gently caressed the little acne marks. "Just breathe with me, okay? In and out, nice and slow..."

He tried to mimic, but his breath sped up involuntarily. The frustration and fear began to return.

"James, look at me," I whispered. Clammy skin, his jaw trembling beneath my hold. "You're okay, just breathe. In through your nose, out through your mouth."

It took a moment, But then something started to happen, slowly, agonizingly slowly, as his breathing started to even out, he was calming down.

"That's it, just like that," I whispered, thumbs brushing his cheeks. I could feel the wetness of the tears on his skin. "James…You're safe now."

He nodded weakly, his eyes still glossy with confused fear. I kept my hands on his face, afraid to release him, afraid that if I did, he might slip again into that madness.

"Tell me what happened," I whispered, I needed to know what the hell had scared him so bad.

He shook his head, and his look dropped to the bed between us, his shoulders slumping, swiping a hand down his face.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. "I didn't mean to… to scare you."

"You don't have to be sorry for a single thing. I'm just glad you're okay now."

But then he shifted back slightly, just enough to look me in the eye, and I could see the struggle in his face.

"C…Cliff," James whispered hoarsely.

I’m that exact moment I knew what was going on. “Oh, baby…” I coo, quickly pulling him to me as his tears return.

James smushes his face into my chest, tears soaking my shirt. “I know… I know, James…”

I can’t even imagine what he’s going through. Of course, I missed Cliff too, it’d only been a month without him. But James… James and Cliff were like brothers.

His sudden, heart wrenching passing had torn James apart in ways that I could hardly begin to understand.

James was stuck in this memory of that horrible crash, reliving that terrible night over and over again.

"I miss him so much," James choked, his face buried against my chest. "I can't… I can't stop thinking about it, about how it should've been me. I should've been the one…"

"No," I cut him off before he could go any further down that path. Reaching a hand up, I gently lifted his face, forcing him to meet my eyes. The eyes that looked back at me were red and swollen, in so, so much pain. "You can't think like that, baby. That wasn't your fault. It was nobodys."

"But it should've been me," he whispered. "I should’ve taken that bunk, not Cliff. He was too good for this world, and now he's gone, and I'm still here…"

There were absolutely no words that would take the pain away and nothing that I could do would ever bring Cliff back, but I could just be there for him, to hold him.

"I'm so sorry, James," I whispered, pressing a kiss to his forehead. "I'm so, so sorry. But you can't blame yourself. Cliff wouldn't want that. He wouldn't want you to suffer like this."

He nodded weakly, his body trembling with sobs as he buried his face in my chest again. "I just… I don't know how to stop this feeling," his voice was small and broken.

"I’ll help," I told him.

"You don't have to do it alone."

[effwon]

'cause i don't think that they'd understand || ln4 x reader (Part 2/2)

Summary: Lando just wants to walk down to the garage before the Miami race with you by his side. George and Carmen walked in together, Alex and Lily walked in together, so why can't you, as well? Despite your self-consciousness, you agree to walk hand-in-hand with him down to the garage right before the big race, but it's a much harder ask for you than anyone could ever realize.

PART ONE HERE

Plus-size (she/her) Reader x Lando Norris

Warnings: Brief mentions of nausea/being sick, panic, reader is plus-sized and very down on herself about it, weight mentions, ect.

Characters: Lando Norris (your boyfriend) and feat Oscar Piastri as a last minute saving grace for you.

Rating: G.

Tags: @cthgee @hellof-1 @notpeachybby

Notes: Thank you for the feedback on part 1! Feedback is what keeps a writer writing, after all! I started this as an experiment and genuinely did not expect the love that would come with it. I put together a part 2 on the fly (I hadn't planned to write it, actually, I didn't think the response would be this high) and am happy to put this to rest now, to work on some other reader fics. I'm happy to entertain requests, just know that smut is not something I will write in detail (I know, that's what most of you want, I'm sorry). Thank you for the support!

Your eyes flutter open and all you can see above you is a blur of light orange and a bright light. A soft groan escapes the back of your throat, and you turn your head to the side to try and keep the light out of your eyes. Your head is swimming, like there’s a pressure pushing against your brain that you can feel as far as the back of your eyes as well. You are laying on something warm and soft, but most definitely alive - if the gentle shuffling beneath you is anything to go by, anyway.

You furrow your brows as you hum out another soft, confused sound. Very slowly, you try to sit up, but someone’s hand presses against your shoulder and applies a little force, enough to keep you from moving in your hazy state.

“Lando?” you ask, your voice soft and unnaturally raspy. Something isn’t quite right. You don’t remember falling asleep - you don’t even really know where you are, but it only makes sense that Lando would be the one with you…right? As you continue to blink your vision back to clarity, a face comes into view above you - one that is very much not Lando. It’s Oscar Piastri, that much your brain can at least piece together. Around him, the walls start to come into view. The ceiling, the toilet, the vanity to your left…

“Not quite, but I promise he’s coming.” Oscar says above you, and you are grateful that he’s barely speaking louder than a whisper. Your head is pounding and your stomach is churning as everything starts to put itself together. You’re only missing a handful of key puzzle pieces, now.

“Oscar?” You mumble, instinctively curling into his warmth for any ounce of comfort you can glean. One of his hands comes up and carefully, thoughtfully brushes stray hair out of your face. You realize he’s attempting to be soothing, as your brain keeps working to figure this out.

“Yep, that one.” he replies, flashing you a smile that seems, in your opinion, quite tense. Right, it’s slowly coming back.

The bathroom - Lando led you to the bathroom at your request, and then left to get himself into his race kit. You were sick, and immediately after vomiting into the sink, a panic attack had taken hold of you. And then –

Your eyes widen slightly in horror. Oscar, right. You had forgotten to lock the door and he - oh, god, he –

“How long was I out?” you ask suddenly, shooting yourself upright in his arms. He blinks back shock, obviously not expecting you to move so quickly, and looks down at his watch for a brief moment.

“Uh, three minutes? It’s not been long.” 

“Jesus,” you gasp, scrambling out of his comforting grip and backing yourself up against the wall. Oscar looks a bit lost, eyes full of concern as he holds his hands out in front of him, fingers splayed. “I’m sorry - oh my god, that’s - I’m sorry.”

“Hey, it’s fine. It’s okay.” he assures you, eerily still as he watches you with a careful gaze. “I’m sorry for touching you without permission. I didn’t want you to hit your head when you fell.”

“That’s not -” you shake your head, feeling your throat tightening with emotion. “No, thank you. That’s not the problem, I promise. I appreciate you.” Anxiety is beginning to swirl in your chest again, but you can feel just how fatigued your body is now. The anxiety, at least, is easier to manage versus pure panic, but it’s making your head spin. 

“It’s okay.” Oscar says again, a bit firmer this time. “I phoned Lando a moment ago, and he’s making his way back right now. I told him I’d stay with you until he got here.”

You nod, relieved to know that Lando would be back for you any moment. You are also grateful for Oscar’s company, regardless of the fact that you hardly know him. Clearly, he’s kind and caring - which doesn’t surprise you, really. Lando hasn’t ever had an off-color thing to say about him.

“Thanks, Oscar. I’m so sorry you had to witness all of-” you swirl your finger around in a circle, searching for the right word, “that. But it means a lot that you didn’t just leave me there.”

“Of course. I don’t know what’s got you so upset, but I hope that you feel better soon, yeah?”

“Yeah. I think it’s a little better already.”

Oscar smiles at you, friendly and kind, and before either of you can utter another word, there’s a frantic knocking at the bathroom door. Oscar’s head snaps back to the door, letting out a small “Oh” as he hops up to his feet and hurries over to unlock the door. Lando’s face comes into view as soon as the door opens, and he looks absolutely distraught. Your chest clenches, knowing that you’re the reason he’s out of sorts, and you lay your head back against the wall.

“When did she wake up? Is she okay? What happened?” you hear Lando ask frantically, firing questions at Oscar before they can be answered. 

Oscar takes it in stride, “She just woke up a moment ago, and she was a bit dazed. She seems okay now, but I don’t know what caused all of this.”

“Thanks, Osc.” Lando breathes, and you can hear the genuine warmth in his tone. “I’ll take it from here, mate.”

There’s a soft ‘click’ as the bathroom door closes, and a slightly louder one as Lando locks the door behind him. His footfalls are quick as he rushes over to you, immediately sliding down the wall to sit next to you on the floor. You look over at him, and your gazes meet for merely a second before he’s wrapping his arms around you and pulling you into his chest.

His scent and the warmth of his body is familiar and comforting in ways you couldn’t possibly verbalize. It’s akin to taking a deep, calming breath of air into your lungs and feeling everything inside of you just slow down for a moment. It’s the relief of the familiarity, the delicacy in which he cradles your head against his heart like you’re his most precious thing.

It makes a lump form in your throat. But you are far too tired for tears, now. Too tired for much of anything but this: sitting here on a dirty bathroom floor, cradled in Lando’s arms.

“I thought you were alright when I left,” he says, so very miserably, “why didn’t you tell me you weren’t? I would’ve stayed.”

“I’m sorry.” you murmur, your voice muffled by the fireproof suit over his chest. You can hear his heart beating rapidly, a gentle barrage of distressed thumps against your ear, and it twists something so deeply in your own chest. You properly worried him, which was the exact opposite of what you wanted to do. “I thought I could work through it while you were changing and that things would be okay by the time you got back.”

“Do you want to tell me what happened?” he urges ever so softly, his hand running up and down your back in the most soothing patterns. You can’t help feeling the warmth of relief encompassing you being back in his presence.

It helps the words flow much easier, without stopping to doubt or scrutinize everything that comes out of your mouth. “It was a panic attack, it didn’t really pop up until after I had initially calmed down. It happens like that sometimes.” You explain, focusing on the ever-present beating of his heart beneath your ear. “Or - it happens like that a lot for me, I guess. Once the initial fight or flight wears off, the real panic comes out. It made me sick and, I dunno, I guess Oscar startled me when he came in and before I even really knew it, I went down.”

Lando’s grip tightens on you almost protectively as he registers your explanation. “Just went down? You say it like it’s the most casual thing.” He scoffs, but there’s no mirth or amusement behind it. You can tell he’s still nervous, still trying to process everything. “Oscar said pretty much the same. Blessing and a curse you forgot to lock the door then, huh?”

You laugh breathily at that, nodding your head in agreement. Had Oscar not been there, you surely would’ve hit your head on the tile and that could’ve been a much scarier sight to behold when someone came by to use the restroom later. As embarrassing as it was to break down in front of someone you hardly knew, you were grateful for his willingness to assist. You would have to find him and give him a proper thank you later.

“Yeah, he’s a nice guy.” You agree, nuzzling into his chest even further. If it were up to you, you would simply lay here in his arms all day long and not think a single thing of it - but you are distinctly aware of the time and of his looming race. Something he should be putting his entire focus into, and not on you. “Now shouldn’t you be out there getting ready for the race?” “Probably,” he admits with a chuckle, leaning down to press a kiss to the top of your head. “But I don’t want to leave here until I know for sure you’re alright.”

His thoughtfulness never ceases to amaze you. Perhaps you’d found him to be a bit taught and agitated earlier (and, perhaps, you had deserved that sort of response from him, given your nearly blatant refusal to simply walk across the paddock into the garage with him), but he’s back to his normal warmth and gentleness once more. A relief, you think, in and of itself.

“I’m alright now, really.” you say, lifting your head up from his chest to flash him a soft, sweet little smile. It isn’t a lie, either. Since he’s come back, you’ve felt exponentially better - a result of the panic attack waning and being in the comforting presence of the person you love most in the world. “I’d really like to go see everything else you wanted to show me.”

Lando’s eyes light up in a way that makes your heart skip a beat. He’s always been a bit reactive, with his heart on his sleeve, and you wouldn’t have him any other way if you’re honest. The genuine excitement that sparks on his face is everything you could ever want or need in life. Just to see him happy, it’s enough. It makes every horrible name you call yourself, every fear, every insecurity and every worry melt away into nothing, like it had never even been there to begin with.

“Let’s get some lunch at hospitality first, and then I’ll take you out to see the car afterwards.” He suggests, lifting himself up from the floor and offering you a helpful hand. “I know a little spot we can eat, away from the cameras and all that.”

Even after the hell you’ve put him through today, a soft feeling blossoms in your chest to know he’s still holding you to the forefront of his mind. He’s still looking for ways to make you more comfortable. He’s still loving you, despite your glaring insecurities. You take his hand, skin warm against yours, and lift yourself up onto your feet with his help.

“I think that sounds lovely.” you reply, reaching up and cupping his cheeks in your hands. You stand on the tips of your toes and lean in, pressing a soft, gentle kiss to Lando’s lips. His breath falters for a mere moment, and then he’s kissing you back just as softly, just as gently. As you pull apart, there’s a shy smile on his face that makes your cheeks burn and your chest ignite with adoration. Even if you tried, you do not think you could possibly love him more.

“I think you’re lovely.” He shoots back, a glint of mischief in his eyes. Your cheeks burn even hotter at his remark, and you bury your face into his shoulder to keep the blush from being too obvious. 

“I think you’re going to make me too sick to eat if you keep this up.”

Lando tosses his head back and laughs, genuine and sweet, the sound washes over you with its subtle burst of serotonin - a much needed side effect.

“Fine, fine, I’ll save the ooey-gooey stuff for after the race, then. Just one more quick thing though-” he says, wrapping his arm around your waist as he leans in to press a kiss to your temple. This time, you choose not to shy away from his touch, no matter how big and gaudy your body feels wrapped up in his arms. “I love you.”

Your heart flutters like the wings of a caged bird, yearning to break out of your chest and nestle up tight within his own. You smile, tossing all of the bad thoughts from earlier in the day out of your mind completely. Once again you’ve learned: as long as you have Lando with you, everything really is okay. “I love you, too.”

The news articles do drop early the next morning, from multiple sources, with their rude and hateful headlines about you, your body type, and your worth in regards to Lando’s love. And, just as you expected, each and every one of them hits like a knife to your gut as you see them pop up one after another on your feed.

But, at the end of every single one of these articles is the same quote from Lando - the only quote he offered the reporters on the matter of your relationship during the entire day.

“Quite frankly, I don’t care what anyone thinks of our relationship. It isn’t their business, it’s mine and her’s, and I genuinely think she’s the most beautiful girl in the world. Nothing is going to change that.”

And you just smile.

[jybyls]

Last night || C.W

Materlist

Synopsis: You and CC are at a college party, but she gets distracted by her friends.

Warnings: G!p!CC, smut, p in v, oral, unprotected sex, anxiety (?), bad writing, and I think that's it.

Words: 1.7k~

- 📜🎧🍂 -

Fuck this party, fuck those people, and fuck her.

CC brought you with her to this party because she got invited by the host and dragged you with her. That's could've been a lot of fun if she didn't abandon you to go get intoxicated with her stupid football friends. You isolated yourself in one of the unoccupied rooms, watching random videos on your phone to make the time pass. An hour, then two, later three, you're now fast asleep on your side with your phone almost falling out of your hand.

CC was finally starting to wonder where you were after three goddamn hours. She looked around the place where you could possibly be. After a good quarter, she finally found you curled up in someone's bed. She sighed as she slowly closed the door behind her. She sat next to you, a soft hand on your leg, rubbing it to wake you up. You jolted awake, "Hey, shh, shh, shh, it's just me." Yeah, that's the problem it was her, and you did not want to see her right now. You moved away from her, picked up your phone, and quickly stood up, "Hey, where are you going ?" You avoided her puppy eyes, knowing you can't stay mad at her when she looks at you like that.

"Away. From you." That came out colder than what you expected, but oh well, she deserved it. "What ? Why ? Baby, come back to me." Her hand grabbed yours, bringing you to her. She slightly looked down at you as her arm looped itself around your waist. It was getting harder not to look at her, but you tried your best looking down at your feet. CC did not like that, "Hey, look at me." She whispered, her hand to your chin so you'd look at her, "No.." You mumbled, pushing your head away from her grip. You felt an overwhelming feeling growing inside your stomach going up your head.

She might be dumb for not immediately understanding her mistake, but she's still your girlfriend, and she can sense when you're about to cry. Her hands hugged your cheeks, forcing you to look at her, "Baby, please. Talk to me." She softly spoke, not to scare you off. You wanted to yell at her for being so stupid, but you knew that yelling at someone their mistake wasn't the best idea and will most surely draw them away from you. So, you took a deep breath, closed your eyes, and talked,

"CC, you left me here for three hours because you were joking around with your friends." Then only she realised the gravity of what she did. Anxiety took control of her body. The only thing on her mind was 'How could you be that dumb ? Leaving your girlfriend alone to a party, she didn't even want to come to in the first place. Oh my god, she'll never forgive me.' Her mind was rambling so much she thought she was saying all those thoughts.

But, no.

Here, you were patiently waiting for her answer, but nothing. Absolutely nothing.

"Please, talk to me." Heard that somewhere before, no ? She snapped out of her thought, finding her voice again, "Sorry, I'm so sorry baby, I'm- shit how could I leave you alone ? For three hours ?! Oh my god, I'm a horrible girlfriend. Fuck we were talking about our next match, you know how football easily distracts me ? No, I can't use that as an excuse. Sorry, sorry. I'm so sorry I love you so much and I did not forget about you. I promise. I just got carried away and-" You cupped her cheeks, that by the way were red as fuck from her panic state.

She metled in your touch, closing her eyes. She softly held your wrists and kissed your palms, "I'm sorry, my love." She whispered, "Maybe I can show you how sorry I am ?" Her eyes shot right into yours. Desperation, lust, and sorrow were readable in those blue eyes of hers, "Please ?" She brought you closer to her. She was so, so, sorry. Poor thing, I just wanted you to forgive her. How could you not when she was so vulnerable ? You gave in, obviously, nodding, letting her know she could try to make it up to you. A smile tugged on her lips as her eyes lighted up like she was the happiest woman on earth.

Her hands slided to your waist, pulling you into a heated kiss. She kept it slow and passionate. All her forgiveness was in that kiss. She pulled you to lay down on the bed, "I'll make you forget how of a bad girlfriend I was." She whispered near your ear before bitting your lobe. She kissed down your jaw, then your neck, delicately leaving hickeys on your neck. Your shirt and bra didn't last long. Her lips on your bare chest were quick to come. She gave equal attention to both of your breasts, which made you impatient, your hips instinctively rolled into her. Usually, she would've teased you about it, but she knew she shouldn't even think about it right now. She kissed all the way down your stomach as her hands were zipping off your skirt, and her teeth were taking care of your panties.

Her lips kissed around your inner thighs, after multiples whining from you she finally kissed your clit. Your body jolted as your hand flew to her hair keeping her between your legs. Her tongue traced an eight shape on your clit, sucking it in every now and then, her hands squeezed your thighs, bringing you closer to her if that was even possible. She moaned in your cunt, the sounds of yours was echoing in the room, her name falling ever so perfectly from your mouth. She made sure her tongue took every inch of you, taking her time to taste you so your flavour will stay on her tongue for days. She ate you out like a starved woman.

Her eyes were taking in the sight in front of her, your mouth wide open, moans, gasps, and heavy breath coming out of it, hot drop of sweats falling down your forehead. You were a hot mess. But the most important thing is that she had a perfect view of the butterfly tattoo under your chin. You got this tattoo specifically for her to have the best angle of it when she gives you head, like right now. She was so happy this tattoo existed. It made everything so much hotter. The way your neck moved with a few veins popping out was such a turn-on for her.

Her hips unconsciously started to rock against the mattress of the bed, her cock was painfully hard and needed any kind of friction. She whined in your cunt yet she went even faster and deeper, she was determined to make you cum.

And that determination was worth it because not so long after your back arched, your head thrown back in the pillow with a final broken scream of her name as your abdomen muscles let go. That was definitely one of the biggest orgasm you ever had. The other one was also caused by CC. Let's just say she knows how your body works.

She took every last drop of what you could give her, licking up your folds one last time before going up to your face for a sweet kiss. "Fuck, I can taste myself." You chuckled, still trying to catch your breath, CC smiled and kissed you again however the sweet kiss quickly turned into a feverish one. You could feel her hard-on grinding against your sensitive cunt, making gasp, breaking the kiss by the same time. Miserable moans and weak groans could be heard from her mouth while her hips rocked harder.

You took her top off along with her skirt and tights. Her dick slapped against her stomach, all hard and needy for you, "Can I ?" She mumbled into your neck, asking for permission to seep into you. You unhesitatingly nodded. Even if you just had a huge orgasm you could never deny your girlfriend's pleasure (plus you were still horny). She didn't waste a second and slowly penetrated your wet pussy. She muffled her moans in your neck, you were the only thing she could think about at this moment, so highly drunk on you.

Your nails scratched her back. Meanwhile, hers were sinking into your side. Her neediness got the best of her, her hips went faster, her cock sliding in and out of you so soothingly. It was one damn of a sight. "Fuck, fuck, you feel so good, love." She panted, moving her face out of your neck to look at you. Pleasure was all over your features.

Your moans were getting a little too loud, so she kissed you to shut you up. Your fingers got lost in her blonde locks as you got lost in the moment. Her hips slapping against the back of your thighs, her fingers teasing your clit, her mouvement getting faster and deeper only to hit that sweet spot of yours, she filled you up, oh, so well, you knew you couldn't last long. And neither could she. The way your walls hugged her cock, the sounds of the wetness, and warmness of your pussy was driving her insane, she only wanted to fill you up with her cum.

And she did. You both reached your climax at the same time, she painted your walls while you owned her cock. She rolled her hips a few more times before her dick finally soften. She pulled out of, hugging you while kissing your forehead, "You did so well, and I'm so sorry I promised I won't do anything like that again. Matter of fact I won't come to parties anymore." You tiringly laughed at her statement, "You can still go to parties but don't forget me like this again." You explained, "I won't, I won't. Let's get cleaned up real quick then go home, huh ?" She kissed your nose and rushed to the shared bathroom to get a towel. She quickly cleaned you up and dressed you, then did the same for her.

She picked you up, knowing you won't be able to walk correctly after those two intense orgasms. "I forgive you." You whispered, a joyful grin formed on her face. She carried you all the way home, ignoring her friends on her out.

The night did not end with those two orgasms.

- 📜🎧🍂 -

A/n: Kinda rushed this tbh, but anyway, I might start answering requests soon :)

Have a good day/night. Love y'all <3

[omgsecretsecret]

Wdym you were drunk

Pairing : Yang Jeongin x gn!reader ; friends to lovers

Genre : idk fluff and slightly suggestive in a way ig? a bit of angst if you squint realll hard

Word count : about 950

Warning : mention of sex while being drunk, do not read if you are sensitive to this subject ; slight sexual themes (talking about sex a little bit but no smut on this one)

Author's note : the pics on top are not mine, credits to the owners ; many bisous to @giddyfatherchris for helping me proofreading this <3

Prompts : from the list made by @quokkareactions

58. "I remember kissing you... WHY DO I REMEMBER KISSING YOU?"

49. "How drunk were you last night?" "Well, I still have my pants on, so not that drunk." "Those aren't your pants."

53. "Well, fuck me." "Already did."

Reminder : do NOT take advantage of someone who isn't sober (it is not what Jeongin does here but it's always good to say it)

◍｡⁠•⁠ ⁠ᵕ⁠ ⁠•⁠｡◍

You wake up slowly, the light of the sun falling on your face dazzling you when you open your eyes. You quickly squint them as a sudden headache hits you. You hold your face and whine at the pain. Ugh. You shouldn't have drank so much last night.

You look around to see the walls of a room that isn't yours but you don't even have time to panic as you immediately recognize the dorm of your best friend and crush, Jeongin. You stay like that, cursing under your breath for not being more mindful yesterday for a few minutes before hearing a small noise coming from outside the room. You are not scared, but you finally start wondering where Jeongin is since he isn't in there and it's like he heard your thoughts as he comes in.

"Oh ! Hello sleepyhead. I heard you mumbling. You need painkillers ?" he smiles softly as he hands you the pills and a glass of water.

You simply nod and try to give him a thankful smile although you are still wincing in discomfort. He sits next to you on the bed as you swallow, putting the drink on the nightstand once you are done. He waits a little moment, giving you time for the medicine to kick in before speaking up.

"So.. what do you think of last night ? he looks at you and you notice his ears turning red while his eyes are somewhat.. hopeful ?

— Last night ? Honestly I don't think I remember much. you chuckle, a bit embarrassed, and his face falls slightly.

— Really ? Nothing ? he asks and you sense a slight tinge of disappointment in his voice but you can't get why.

— Aah yes maybe. I... I think I remember kissing you... WAIT WHY DO I REMEMBER KISSING YOU ? you look at him with wide eyes, waiting for him to explain.

— You don't... You really don't know ? he sounds sad and you can't even understand why. How drunk were you last night ? he asks a bit cautiously.

— Well I still have my pants on so not that drunk. you joke as you look at Jeongin clueless, confused and feeling somewhat bad. He just looks like a kicked puppy right now.

— Those aren't your pants, y/nie.

— WHAT ? you look at him in shock again. What the hell happened last night ?

— They're mine. he doesn't even dare to look at you, his voice low.

— What ? I think you're going to have to explain this one, Jeongin.

— I... he sighs. Yeah, you're right. he looks away before speaking. So.. last night, you... You kissed me. You looked a tad bit tipsy, but really not that much ! You started kissing me.. like.. a lot. And you told me about how you loved me... As more than a friend. I was so shocked, but I told you I liked you too and... We went in the room. I'm sorry. You kept telling me you loved me and you wanted this and I believed you. he is playing with his fingers nervously as he talks, eyes fixated on the floor.

— Wow... you let out, processing the informations. I never thought I'd... Oh gosh.. you shake your head. And I told you that like that ? Well, fuck me.

— Already did.. he mumbles and you snap your eyes back at him.

— Seriously ?

— No.. look I'm sorry I'm just nervous so I joked to try to relax. I'm scared you didn't mean it or you hate me now. he can hear his own heart pounding in his ears yet he can't get himself to look at you.

— What ? No, Innie ! It's not that. I trust you, everything is good. I just never thought I'd tell you I like you this way. you feel your cheeks heat up in embarrassment. Last night I thought drinking would be a good idea so I could maybe get the courage to confess to you. But it seems I drank a bit too much. you chuckle and you hear him sigh in relief.

— So you don't hate me ? And you really have a crush on me ? Because I really do love you. he blushes and gosh is he cute.

— Of course, Innie. Don't worry okay ? I just wish I could remember how last night was. Our first night together out of many... I hope ? you ask shyly.

— Out of so so many. he nods and gives you a soft smile before moving to settle besides you, wrapping his arm around your shoulders. But first, I'd like to spend a nice and chill morning with my partner.

You smile and whisper a sweet "i'd love that" before resting your head on his shoulder, heart light and full of happiness.

◍｡⁠•⁠ ⁠ᵕ⁠ ⁠•⁠｡◍

do not repost, translate or rewrite without my written authorisation

[autistic-inmate]

SUPERNATURAL LUCIFER X FEM!READER

(Reader is referred to as sister)

- You joke around with Lucifer and your brother, Dean, doesn’t like it :)

fluff 😇

1.2k words

I walked into the room that my brothers were in, "Where's Clarence?"

"Not sure, said he had some angel business to deal with." Dean muttered as he continued to stare at his laptop screen. I sighed and fell down onto one of the chairs "I'm booorreedd." I whined and nobody said anything, "Ok I guess I'll go annnd.." I paused while I thought about what to do, "Find a case." Normally they would 'advise' not to because it could be dangerous on my own, but they didn't even look up. Maybe I should elaborate, "Actually you know what? I'm gonna go find a vamps nest." Ok they definitely wouldn't let me go alone. But I still got no answer.

"Ignore everything I just said, I can't be bothered. I think, I'm just gonna go talk to one of the angels." I hoped that would get their attention considering they dislike most of them. "Hey, I should go talk to the devil, I mean he's probably pretty lonely." Ok that must have gotten there attention. Nope, still nothing.

Alright well, "Lucifer. You know? Satan?" That caught their attention and Dean glared at me but I smiled innocently. Sam looked at me over his laptop, "What? Sorry, I'm just trying to figure this out and I feel like I haven't slept in years, did you say something about Lucifer? Has something happened?" I could tell I hit a bit of a nerve by mentioning his name but how else was I supposed to get their attention. "No, well yes I said I should go talk to him 'cause he's probably lonely." I smiled innocently at them again but they didn't look very happy.

"Don't even joke about that. I don't want you anywhere near him." I could tell Dean was serious but I didn't understand why. Well, I did, I knew why. He's killed people, he wanted Sam as a vessel, he tried to start the apocalypse and he is Satan. But I know a side to Lucifer that they don't, a side to him that's not all death and destruction.

I was about to speak but I felt the temperature drop. I saw the panic in Sams face and Dean reached for his gun by instinct. "You called, darling?" Oh joy, Lucifer is here.

"What a pleasant surprise." I turned to face him with the fakest, most cheesiest grin I could manage. "You were thinking off me so damn much that it basically came to me like a prayer, why were you thinking about me, Y/N?" He smirked as he walked closer to us and I rolled my eyes. "I was thinking about how much of an ass you are, my brothers here were agreeing." I smirked right back at him and he scoffed "I know you like me really and you enjoy my company more than anyone else's, you're not fooling anyone." He shrugged slightly like what he had just said was painfully obvious.

"Ok that's enough, I can't take it anymore. Lucifer what the hell are you doing here, really?" Dean looked pretty mad that I was joking around with the devil but who can blame me, he's quite funny when he's not trying to start world war three.

"You act like I'm about to try and start the apocalypse Deany, I mean c'mon, I'm totally over all that now." He smiled like he just told Dean he'd bought him some flowers and baked him a cake. "Right of course, I'm sorry for assuming the worst from the literal devil, you must've just popped in to give me chocolate and watch a movie with us." Dean spoke sarcastically and Lucifer pretended to be offended and shook his head. "Wow. I know you don't like me, but that was harsh. I mean, I really did come here to watch a movie. Not with you exactly, but that is the reason. I can't believe you think so lowly of me Deano." Lucifer matched Deans sarcastic tone and it just pissed my brothers off even more, meanwhile I found it to be good entertainment.

"First of all, stop adding letters onto my name. Secondly, if you mean that you came to watch a movie with my sister? You can forget it. I won't let you get anywhere near her." Aaaaaand protective brother mode is officially on. "I'm already near her." Lucifer scoffed as he walked closer to me and threw his arm around my shoulders. "Dude get your big ass arm off of me." I tried to shrug his arm off but he added another arm so he was giving me a really weird side hug, successfully trapping me in his arms.

However before I could complain anymore, a sudden gunshot echoes throughout the room and it makes me flinch. Lucifer let go of me with a grunt. "Ouch." He pouted like a child that didn't get his own way.

I turned to look at him and realised that Dean had shot him. "Was that really necessary, Dean? I can handle myself against big ole pouty satan over here." I felt him poke me at the insult so I looked back at him to see him still pouting and I giggled. "Yes. It was completely necessary. I told him that I wasn't gonna let him near you, Y/N. I don't like how close you two seem, all buddy-buddy and shit, it's not right. Has he got you under some sorta spell? Do you need help, Y/N? 'Cause I definitely do not have a problem with killing the devil himself." Dean looked between the two of us practically giggling like a pair of school girls.

"Yes Dean, he has me under a very powerful spell." He didn't look impressed with my sarcasm. "Whatever, but you hurt her and I swear I will find a way to end you." And with that promise he left the room. We both looked at Sam and it was pretty awkward for a second before he cleared his throat "Yeah, Well I- erm- I need to carry on with this, so.." He got up and walked out with his laptop.

"Wow. You know, you could be here to kill me and both of my brothers just left me to be murdered." I joked and turned around to face him.

"You know I'd never hurt you though, right? You are one of the very very few humans I can tolerate." His smirk was replaced with a genuine smile as he looked down at me. "I know." I nodded and it was quite for a moment as I looked at him, taking in his features. Damn, his eyes are so pretty and his hair looks so fluffy, I want to just run my hands through it so fucking bad.

"So," I cleared my throat like I was trying to get rid of the tension in the room. "What movie do you wanna watch, Luci?" My eyes widened slightly as I realised what I had called him, but it was too late, he had already heard it. "'Luci' huh?" I was about to start apologetically rambling before I noticed a grin spread across his face. "I like it, but only from you. I don't want some demon walking around calling me 'Luci ', it'll ruin my reputation." He chuckled, "Oh and I'm 99.9% sure that you forgot I can read your thoughts, your eyes are pretty too." His smirk was back as he cockily walked out of the room, leaving me stood on my own in embarrassment.

[timidpumpkin]

Little Light (Stucky x reader)

Part 2: Nyctophobia

Nyctophobia//meaning//fear of the dark

Pairing: Dark!Stucky x f!reader

Summary: Steve and Bucky want you to adjust to your new life as easily as possible. Unfortunately, you don't quite seem to understand that yet.

Warnings for this part: Dark!Stucky, Daddy!Stucky, Forced age regression, Female reader, Kidnapping, Implied drugging, Manipulation, Reader cries, Some violence against reader, Slapping, Being tied up, Implied super insanely tall Steve and Bucky.

Warnings for future parts: Panic attack, Slight dubcon, Stockholm Syndrome. (Will add more as needed)

Let me know if I missed any!!

Word count: 4.3k

Notes: Let me know what you guys think! hehe:)) I can't wait to post the next part! Also, minors DO NOT interact, and if you're above 18, please put your age in your bio, or I seriously will block you (not joking).

Minors and Ageless blogs DNI or I WILL block you.

Heavy. 

You feel heavy. Every part of you does. Your eyelids in particular seem to weigh a ton as you will them to open. 

Are you sick?

Your eyes reveal the lights are dim in your room. Except–this isn’t your room. You’ve certainly never seen that light fixture before, and the bed you’re laying in feels much wider than the one you’ve slept in most of your life. You shift, attempting to gain a better perspective of your surroundings when you feel something around one of your wrists. Your cloudy brain starts processing that you might very well be in a dangerous situation. You use your free hand to fumble with the object binding you to the bed, but it’s useless, it’s no regular rope. Frankly, the material isn’t anything you recognize and there’s no way to get it off. 

You manage to get yourself into a somewhat seated position when you notice your clothes. You’re wearing a long-sleeved sleep gown–something you don’t own. Underneath it, you feel…crinkles, and padding where your underwear should be.

Then you hear it–footsteps. You make a vain attempt to free your arm again, but it only serves to dizzy you, blurring the world around you as you register two figures making their way through the door. 

“Oh, she’s awake.” A voice speaks, delight in their tone. 

You hear a gruffer voice mutter something you can’t quite make out.

Your vision begins to clear somewhat as one of the figures kneels beside the bed. 

“Hey sweet girl,” the first voice softly greets you. “I’m so sorry we weren’t here when you woke up.” his hands reach for you. Naturally, you back away, distancing yourself from him, but the binding on your wrist only lets you get so far. 

“Wha-what’s going on?” your words come out slightly slurred through your weak and weary voice.

“I know, you must be so confused,” he sits on the bed then, reaching for you again. “come here, and we’ll explain everything, okay?” His tone is almost patronizing, as if he’s speaking to a child.

“N-no-I–” A powerful arm yanks you forward. It’s the other man. He maneuvers your body in front of theirs, letting the first man encapsulate your arms. You try to twist away from him, but it’s useless as his hold on you feels even stronger than the material that binds you to the bed frame.

“Be gentle Bucky, we just got her.” he says lightly rubbing the roughed-up area on your arm.

Adrenaline must be on your side, sobering you up as you register the…stranger.

“S-steve?” you say, disbelief in your tone. 

“Yeah,” he smiles, “I knew you’d remember me, but you don’t have to call me that. It’s just Dada from now on okay? And this is daddy.” he nods to the dark-haired man beside him–Bucky, who doesn’t look all that friendly, not that you would necessarily ascribe that word to Steve right now though. Bucky has longer hair, essentially shoulder length with a few pieces that frame his deep-set eyes. He, like Steve, has a beard, though it’s more on the scruffy side.

Steve’s words confuse you. You try tearing yourself away from them, but again, it’s to no avail as his grip only tightens around you. It doesn’t necessarily hurt, but its firmness indicates to you how easily he could hurt you.

“None of that now sweetheart,” Bucky tilts his head at you, reaching to gently caress your face before trailing his fingers down your jaw, and gripping your chin. “Dada’s going to explain everything. You just need to listen for him,” he angles your face towards Steve. “You can do that…can’t you doll?” you feel his question is more of a demand. You don’t answer as you continue staring at Bucky with petrified eyes. They then share a look, one you can’t discern the meaning of.

“Hey,” Steve tries averting your attention back to him and Bucky’s grip releases you. “There’s no need to be scared, we’re not going to hurt you,” his eyes are almost…pleading, imploring you to believe what he’s telling you. You shift your wrist, your uncomfortable position making it hurt. “would you like me to take that off?” he offers. You nod. “Okay, but when I do, I don’t want you trying to run off…understand?” You nod again, just wanting to be free of it. When Steve still hasn’t moved though, Bucky speaks.

“He asked you a question, doll. Answer it.” 

“Uh-yes…” they still only look at you, unmoving. So you try adding “please.” you say softly.

“Oh, so polite for us. I told you she’d have good manners with us,” Steve says, beginning to fiddle with the ‘rope’ tying you to the bed. You turn to watch him work when you feel Bucky’s hand on your jaw again, turning you to face him this time. He doesn’t say anything, just stares at you while Steve works mysteriously on your wrist. It only takes a moment, and when Steve bends down to place the rope on the ground, illogical instinct takes over. 

You move as fast as you can, somehow, freeing yourself from Bucky as you find both your feet planted on the floor opposite the bed. You make for the door, but before you can even register what happened, Bucky has you. Arms pinned behind your back and chest pressed against him as your feet dangle off the ground. 

“Looks like she’ll need to learn how to listen though.”

“Let me,” you thrash yourself as much as you can, “go!” desperate to get away from whatever this is. 

Steve is now beside both of you. “Stop fighting us angel,” he appeals, helping bucky secure your kicking legs. “we’ll tell you everything you need to know if you just stop resisting. And besides…it’s really no use. You’re only going to hurt yourself if you keep this up.”

You let out another grunt as you try to move, once again, to no avail. Your tired body gives out, slumping in their hold.

“There’s a girl.” Bucky praises. You’re busy catching your breath when Steve suggests moving to the living room. 

Bucky, for a moment, considers letting you down to walk, but ultimately decides against it as he scoops his arm under your knees and carries you to the living room. You try absorbing as much information as you can. 

The living room is just outside the space you were just in. Gray and navy accent the furniture and decor. There’s a fireplace across from the couch Bucky sits down on, with you laid across his lap. You can see a kitchen adjacent to the living area. Windows give you a glimpse of trees upon trees. It’s…homey. However, your quick scan reveals no door to the outside world that you can see. 

Instinctually, you try to move off of Buck’s lap, not liking the vulnerable position, but he holds you in place as Steve settles on the chaise part of the couch, beside you both. 

“Pretty in here, isn’t it?” Steve asks. You don’t respond. “Don’t worry, we’ll give you a full tour in a bit.” he smiles, patting your thigh lightly, the way a person would do with a close friend or something. Except, you’re not his friend. You barely know him, you’ve only met Steve once, and you’ve certainly never met Bucky. Bucky–he looks familiar, but you can’t place his face immediately. Much like when you first met Steve, you’re pretty sure you’ve only seen his face on the news. 

“Princess?” Steve says taking a hold of your hands that are resting at your navel. He gently holds your hands, and you resist the urge to pull away. You’d like to think that’s because you’re a quick learner, but really, you know you’re in no condition to put up another fight. Hell–even if you were, you’re quickly realizing how pointless that would be. 

“Remember what I said? We’re not going to hurt you, but you can’t be acting out like that, okay? Are you ready to listen now?” You nod your head, still frightened, but…undeniably curious as to what he’ll say. “Use your words sweetheart.” Steve encourages gently.

“I-yes, okay.” Steve looks at you as if he’s expecting you to say something more, but decides to continue anyway.

He begins by telling you how captivated he was by you the first night you met, but how he also…worried about you. He reiterated the same words he told you that night, telling you how unsafe it was to be walking alone like that. But it wasn’t just that, he saw how pure and innocent you are. He and Bucky decided they needed to protect that innocence, and keep you safeguarded from the outside world.

“It’s dangerous out there doll, haven’t you seen the news before? All kinds of awful things out there.” Bucky chimes in.

“We saved you angel. We brought you here to take care of you. We know it’s something you can’t handle on your own, and that’s okay. There’s nothing you have to worry about anymore, except being our good little girl.” Steve beamed at you, but you felt like you were spinning. You could certainly hear the words coming out of their mouths, but you were also certain, you did not understand them–okay, maybe you do understand, but you can’t just give in to this…lunacy. 

“Confused babydoll?” Bucky snaps you out of your thoughts. He’s been peering down at you the whole time, caressing the back of your head.

“Poor girl,” Steve says, pity in his voice, “I know this is all so new, but you’ll start to see in time.”

“We’re going to take real good care of you, doll. All you have to do is listen to what Dada and I tell you, and you’ll be safe, with us." Bucky adds.

You shake your head and start fighting Bucky’s grip again. “I’m not-I’m not doing anything! This is crazy! You’re-you’re insane!” it’s all you can think to say before you feel a sharp sting on your face. It shocks you and immediately brings tears to your eyes.

“I don’t like that tone, babygirl. Now I know you’re confused but that doesn’t mean you get to talk back to daddy like that. Do you understand me?” Bucky grips your face in his large hand. “Look at me when I’m talking to you doll.” His harsh words only make you cry more. Steve leans in then, softly wiping the tears from your face. 

“Hey hey,” he speaks softly. “it’s okay, she’s just learning, you’re just learning aren’t you babygirl?” you hesitantly nod in agreement, it seeming the safest option at the moment. “Why don’t I get you some juice?” he offers, “would you like some juice?” 

You nod again, sniffling. Bucky’s grip on your face tightens “Words, doll.” he warns. 

“Y-yes, I’d like some juice…p-please” you sound so…meek when you speak.

“Good girl.” Steve smiles at you. When he returns, he hands Bucky a…bottle. You can’t tell its exact contents but you can tell by the condensation blanketing the outside of it that it’s cold. It’s then you realize just how thirsty you really are. Your mouth would water if it could. 

You try sitting up again so you can drink. You’re confused when Bucky holds you in place and starts bringing the bottle to your mouth. You try turning your head to the side but he holds you in place, bottle tip pressing against your shut lips. There’s no way you’re letting him force you to drink. 

“Open,” he demands. 

“MMM-MM” you try saying no through your closed lips. Bucky has Steve help hold you still while he tries forcing it into your mouth again. 

“Don’t make me open that pretty mouth for your doll,” Bucky says, “‘cause I will.” he promises, and you don’t miss the sinister grin on his face. Still, your mouth remains shut tight as you struggle against them. It’s then you feel an intense pinching on your thigh–it hurts, it really hurts. 

You instinctually let out an “ow!” as Bucky swiftly uses that moment to slip the bottle into your mouth, holding it there firmly. 

“Drink.” He orders. 

“Come on babygirl, you need the nutrients,” Steve’s soothing voice encourages you. “just drink a little for us, okay? It’ll make you feel so much better.” he tries to persuade you, but you don’t want to. For all you know, it could be tainted–drugged even. You don’t want to feel as bad as you did when you woke up again. They don’t budge though, and after you realize they’re not going to back off, you give in, sucking on the tip.

It’s apple juice,

good apple juice.

You try analyzing for any foreign substance–as if you’d be able to tell–but it tastes perfectly normal. No, delicious actually. Your thirst takes over as you take more than a few sips. They both hold you in place while you empty the bottle for its contents, praising you as you go. 

“Very good…good girl,” Steve murmurs the rest of his praises to you, now gently petting your head. 

“See now, that wasn’t so hard was it babygirl?” Bucky’s face shows no discernible emotion. He sounds condescending, but for a moment–maybe even less than that–you swear you see a glint of…admiration in his eyes. 

“Would you like some more? Maybe some water?” Steve offers. The juice really did help you feel better with your body lacking hydration and calories. So, reluctantly, you nod your head. 

You feel another sharp pinch at your thigh then. 

“Words sweetheart. You need to learn to use ‘em” Bucky explains.

“y-yes, water, please.”

“Yes please…what?” Steve prods. Was there some other magic word you weren’t aware of? “You need to start using our names babygirl”

Oh.

“Yes, please…Steve,” you say only to feel yet another pinch to your thigh causing you to yelp. “Ah! Stop that!” It hurt. It hurt the first two times, but now you’re certain they’ll be a bruise there from it being inflicted so many times. 

“It’s okay, Buck.” Steve says.

“She needs to learn.” he replies sternly, eyes still trained on you. 

“I know,” Steve looks towards you, “but you’re still just confused, aren’t you little girl? You just need your daddies to teach how to be good, huh? That’s okay, we’ll go over more of the rules later, but for now, you need to know to call me ‘Dada’, and Bucky ‘Daddy’ okay?...Can you do that for me, sweet girl?”

Oh.

“Princess?” he urges after a moment of silence.

“Yes, p-please…Dada.” you mumble the last word begrudgingly, but also because you feel slightly embarrassed at the word. You shouldn’t be, they are making you say it after all, but you can’t help the funny feeling it gives you. It makes you feel so small. You try to ignore the flushed feeling that fills your cheeks too. 

“Good, very good princess.” he smiles at you before leaving and returning with a different bottle, one filled with water this time. “Now just sit here, drink your water, and keep being a good girl for daddy while I go make you some food. I know my little girl needs to eat.” he leaves you with a pat to your head. 

Bucky is holding the water-filled sippy cup, with his other arm supporting your neck. “You wanna sit up?” he asks. And you do. Anything to get out of this position and into a more comfortable one. One where maybe you can’t be as easily subdued…maybe…probably not. You nod and he glares at you, eyes narrowing in warning before you quickly answer, not wanting to be pinched again. 

“Uh-uhm, y-yes…D-daddy,” his eyes relax, his face returning to its normal scowl, and he gently helps lift you up. His hands never leave your body, attached to you in some way as he sets you beside him, your back now against the soft cushion of the couch. You gingerly take the cup from his hand when it’s offered to you. 

He watches you the whole time. You don’t look at him as you try keeping yourself busy with drinking and looking at your surroundings. You can see Steve to the left in the kitchen. You wonder what he’s making. 

Several minutes go by when you feel it. You squirm a little, just to be sure, and you are. You have to pee. You also become acutely aware that your ‘underwear’ feels crinkly, and…puffy. You can’t see, but if you didn’t know any better, you’d say you have on a diaper. You think you noticed it earlier but so much has gone on since then, that you haven’t had time to think about it, or that fact that it means they put it on you. They put your gown on too. You don’t like the implication of any of it.

You bite your lip, not sure how to ask for what you need, feeling the urge grow. 

“You need something sweetheart?” Bucky asks, tilting his head down to you. 

“Uhm…”

He speaks lower this time, almost whispering. “You need to go potty?” you nod your head sheepishly, too embarrassed to speak. He seems to think for a moment. Eventually, you look up to him. “You can go right here if you want to babygirl,” he says, more softly than you’ve heard him speak thus far. “Or, I can show you the bathroom if you want to be a big girl.” The implication of what he just said only adds to your embarrassment ten-fold. You want to hide. But you definitely need to use a real bathroom, so you speak up. 

“Yes-I mean, yes I would like to use the bathroom…please…daddy” you hate how you can’t even look him in the eye. 

But Bucky loves it. He adores how timid you are right now. So embarrassed. He can’t help but relish in seeing your soft and leery face turned downward as you attempt to hide from his gaze. How difficult it is just for you to speak to them, stuttering over every word. She really is perfect. 

He stands and offers his hand to you. You take it, and he starts guiding you back to the room you were in before. You freeze as you near the door. He looks back to you, cocking his head,

“What’s wrong, sweetheart?”

You don’t know how to answer him. You just know you feel terrified. You just know you don’t want to go back to the room where this all began. The room where all the lights were dim. The room where you woke up feeling awful. The room where you were tied to the bed. The room where-

“You scared of the dark, doll?” he asks, you swear you see a tiny smirk on his face. He reaches in with his hand and the room in front of you brightens up. “Better?” he looks back at you. You nod slightly, still scared. “come on then.” he lightly tugs at your hand and you cautiously follow.

Now that the lights are on you can make out that this must be their bedroom. The bed sheet covering the large bed is slightly ruffed from where you laid. There are personal objects scattered across the dresser and side tables. Decor of art and sorts covering the walls. In this light, it’s just as…welcoming as the rest of the house. 

He leads you to another door, and puts his hand on the doorknob before you can, narrowing his eyes at you. 

“I won’t go in there with you, but if I hear you try anything, don’t think I won't come in there,” he steps closer to you, towering over you, much like steve. “and I will know if you do.” He lowers his hand and steps back just enough so you have to squeeze by him to get through the door. You don’t think he’s as tall as Steve, but he’s close and still looms over you nonetheless. 

The bathroom is sizable, to say the least. It has two sinks, a large whirlpool tub, and a shower on the opposite side of it. 

Once you’re done, you struggle to pull up your…pull-up. You breathe a sigh of relief when you inspect it, and it’s clean. At least you didn’t wet yourself while you were out. And how long were you out? You know you got home late, and they must have…taken you in the night. You noticed a clock on the wall earlier showed it was now around 4 pm. You must have slept for a long time. 

You debate on taking the pull-up off completely–throwing it in the trash, but as you have no replacement underwear, you figure this is better than going without. 

Bucky calls from outside the door, asking if you’re almost done. You quickly wash your hands, finding yourself having to stand on the tips of your toes just to reach the soap. 

When you emerge, Bucky looks you up and down as if he’s assessing you for something–what–you’re not sure. 

Once you’re back, the food is ready as they guide you to the dinner table near the kitchen. Bucky’s hand hasn’t left yours as he guides you into the seat, only releasing you to take his own. In front of you is a bowl of mac and cheese–one of your favorite dishes–and honestly, it looks delicious. 

Your stomach growls in agreement as you start to dig in. You're only a few bites in when you notice, through the corner of your eye, a door. It’s to your right. 

“Is it good sweetheart?” Steve asks. You nod with your mouth full, hoping the food will excuse you from having to answer them properly. They’re not eating with you, but they are seated across from you at the round table. Not far–but it’s certainly the furthest both of them have been from you since your arrival, and the longest you’ve gone without them holding you in some way.

You don’t know what overtakes you. Probably your flight instinct telling you this is the only chance you’ll get. You hastily shove the bowl across the table to bucky–since he’s the closest to the door–hoping it’ll give you enough time to distract him as you bolt towards your exit. Somehow, you make it. This is it, you think. But-

Of course.

It’s locked. It won’t budge as you thrash the handle like a manic until you feel hands tearing you from it, whipping you around. 

“I guess you really don’t know how to listen.” Bucky stares down at you, eyes darker than you’ve seen them before. Steve is close behind with any kind of softness gone from his face as well. They both look livid. “Didn’t we just tell you not to run away from us?” his voice gets louder. He picks you up, throwing you over his shoulder in one swift motion. “You know, I really didn’t want to have to punish you on your first day here.” he begins carrying you somewhere as you thrash against him.

“Then don’t! Let me go! Put me down!” you beat your arms against his solid back. 

“I’m afraid you won’t learn your lesson unless we do” you hear Steve say. Your swaying view tells you you're heading up the stairs. You continue the assault on Bucky’s back until you're in a different room where he puts you in a chair that’s facing the corner of the room. You have no time to move as Steve is quickly pinning down your legs, while bucky forces your arms backward. They work together tying you to the chair with the metal rope used on your wrist earlier.

“Just had to be a bad girl.” Steve mumbles as he finishes his work. He looks up to you, and you see… disappointment in his eyes. “we told you not to fight us, princess, you brought this on yourself,” he says standing up.

You plead with them, begging them to let you go with heavy tears beginning to fall, but it seems to fall on deaf ears. When bucky’s done with your arms, he stands up, truly towering over you now. 

“Until you’ve learned your lesson,” he grabs your face pointing it directly at the blank wall. “you’ll stare at this corner,” you sob harder, not even realizing you had started crying. Bucky leans down, his mouth right next to your ear. “cry all you want, doll. It won’t matter.” you respond with more fruitless pleas. “We’ll come get you when we’ve decided you’ve had enough.” 

and they leave you. 

Silence takes over the room and that’s when the tears really begin. You're screaming into the air, begging to be let go. You yell until your vocal cords physically hurt, and then you're just sobbing again. Quiet tears tickle your face as you have no way to wipe them.

Your head hurts from crying. You feel awful. Your body hurts from the position you're forced in. You’ve been crying this whole time…can’t they hear you? 

You don’t understand why you’re here. Less than 24 hours ago, you were living a normal life, and now you're trapped, truly imprisoned in this house with two men you barely know. They say they want to take care of you. If that's true then why did they tie you up and leave you here alone? 

Shouldn't they know how much that scares you? You’ve been in here for hours. So long the sun has disappeared completely, leaving no light in the room. Doesn’t Bucky know how scared of the dark you are? Didn't Steve say how dangerous it was for you to be left alone? 

Your heart hurts, why aren’t they coming to take care of you like they said they would? Is it really because you were that bad…so bad…

[gamerbearmira]

Hello it is I!

POV PEPA

She needs to calm down. Gain some control. But it's a little hard to do that when her mind is racing the way it is. She doesn't understand why this is happening. And why to poor Mirabel? She's such a wonderful girl. She doesn't deserve this, and poor Julieta she must be out of her mind with worry and fear.

She needs to calm down her panicking like this isn't going to help anyone, let alone her sister who needs her right now. She focuses on her breathing.

in-one, two, three.

out-one, two, three.

Clear skies, clear skies,clear skies

She isn't aware of how much time has passed around her but she has a feeling it's only been a few minutes. Felix is right next to her whispering sweet things in her ear, dios Mio he's such a wonderful man, she takes another calming breath in, feeling the weather around her calming down as she does. She then takes a look around the room needing to ground herself in the moment. Her mother is sitting at the head of the table like always but she looks tired, not reacting to her storm like she usually would just sitting there. She sees her brother-in-law entering the dinning room with her sobrina in his arms. Finally she looks over to see Dolores and Camilo sitting in their usual spots both looking at her with wide shock and fearful looks. She wants to comfort them but she honestly has no idea what she could even say in this moment that would comfort them so instead she looks for Antonio.

He isn't here.

The wind that just calmed down picks up again.

"WHERE'S ANTONIO?" She whips around to look at her husband barely recognizes her own panicked screeching which she almost regrets doing seeing her daughter flinch from the corner of her eye.

She watches Felix blink in shock then look around for their youngest son only to have panic fill his eyes when he realizes that he isn't there. "I d-don't know I.... He was here just a minute ago!"

Before she can panic even more Dolores squeaks out "He's with Tia Julieta." The relief that fills Pepa is instant and fills her entire being but just as instantly as the relief came so did the heartbreak. Julieta is in the nursery with a baby Mirabel. He didn't go into the nursery looking for Julieta.

She sighs softly trying to mentally prepare herself for what shes about to do "thank you Dolores." She quickly gets up but stops there just behind Augustine and Isabela and Luisa is Julieta with Antonio and a squirm and whimpering baby cradled in her arms.

Julieta's pov

She didn't mean to start crying but Antonio asking for Mirable shattered the small amount of control she had built up. She doesn't cry long just a moment but she feels guilty for doing so. Antonio stands in front of her looking so scared and lost and her crying just makes him feel worse but she can't help it.

"Tia what's wrong? Why did you cry? I'm sorry I didn't mean to make you cry!" Antonio looks so heartbreakingly sad and confused which almost makes Julieta cry again but she keeps her composure this time.

"Oh Antonio no. You didn't make me cry sweetheart.... I am just really sad. Casita did something last night and well... Come here and look." She shifts the now quiet bundle in her arms so that Antonio can see the baby Mirable. Antonio quickly moves forward,practically crawling into her lap to get a better look. Mirable smiles slightly as she looks up at Antonio which makes Julieta smile slightly at the adorable sight the two of them make.

"I don't understand.... This is a baby... Why would a baby make you sad? Shouldn't everybody be happy?" Antonio looks up to her waiting for her answer

"yes usually a baby would make everyone happy. But this isn't just any baby... This is.... Mirable." Julieta stumbles through her explanation trying her best to explain something she herself doesn't understand.

"Mira? This is Mira?" He looks back and forth between her and Mirable a strange thoughtful look on his face.

"yes this is Mira. I don't know how and the why is a little... Complicated but this is Mira tonito." Julieta hopes he doesn't have any questions about it she doesn't know how much more she can take.

He nods his head once before saying "Ok. Is Mira coming to breakfast?" Julieta is both relieved that he doesn't have any questions and slightly shocked at his quick acceptance of the situation.

"I.... Yes. I think Mira and I should go to breakfast now, in fact why don't we all walk to the dining room now?" Pepa is more than likely calmed down by now and trying to delay this will probably only make it worse in the long run. Mirable whimpers slightly from her cradled arms.

Antonio hops off her lap with a quick "ok." He holds out one of her hands for her to take and as soon as she takes it he starts leading her to the dining room. As they make their way to the dining room Mirable starts to squirm and whimper.

All eyes are on her as soon as she's in sight in the dining room she shifts slightly uncomfortable but takes a deep breath before saying a simple "Hi." She finds herself surrounded by well meaning family members asking questions and she instantly regrets leaving the nursery.

Pepa realizing Antonio was gone but only after while is so real. And then when she finally calmed down, she started up again 🌚 or at least she will soon👹👹 But these guys had Julieta stressing 💀💀 Mirabel too. Wouldn’t be surprised if the chaos (and the QUESTIONS) left the poor girl overwhelmed. And she’s not even the one answering them 🦈🦈

All of them need to be cut a break 💀💀

Julieta after coming downstairs:

[gtgbabie0]

Pretty angel

{You can’t hide your insecurities from Tommy, not when he’s so attentive with you}

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It starts off with small things, as it always does with this kind of stuff, it happens before you even subconsciously notice and by the time that happens you’re too far gone in your own self-sabotage.

But Tommy notices, he notices how your eyes never linger on the mirror, he haphazardly hung up, almost as if you do everything in your power to not look at it, and when you do he notices the grimace that stains your face, the disgust that tarnishes your eyes and he can’t imagine the words that scratch heedlessly at your mind.

It hurts him more than you know, his heart aches at the thought of you thinking that you’re anything but a downright angel sent from the heavens above, and there’s an odd sense of guilt that squeezes him because maybe he’s not telling you enough?

He watches you intently as you walk into the living room a certain sadness casts over your beautiful face, and he smiles so brightly as he pats the empty seat beside him, and it’s hard not to smile back.

“Hey love bug” he beams like a lovesick puppy pressing a kiss to your cheek and he doesn’t miss the way you almost wince away from his touch, and his heart near enough breaks.

There’s an odd silence that wedges between the two of you, “So, what we watching tonight?” You try and be as chirpy as possible pushing all the negative feelings you have about yourself down and covering them with fake happiness.

But he notices, of course, he does. You’re Tommy’s absolute world, “Your pick baby” he reminds you gently

You nod with a small smile before getting up to where he keeps all the DVD’s and you flick through them before finally settling on the cheesiest romance movie you can find, and you giggle when he lets out a groan, “I know it’s your guilty pleasure, just admit it sweetheart” you laugh and Tommy’s heart blooms at the sweet noise.

“Yeah yeah, you got me, baby, it’s a real guilty pleasure of mine” he chuckles as you excitedly put it on.

However his smile soon falters when you decide to sit away from him, and his chest feels heavy when you slightly shift away as he inches closer.

There’s a silence that stifles the air with tension, and it’s enough to make you feel nauseous. Tommy knows he needs to talk to you he can't let you keep isolating yourself.

His hands take yours carefully, “You gotta talk to me honey— it just feels like you’re tryin' to distance yourself from me, what’s going on sweet thing?” he suddenly asks and your eyes widen in shock as panic seeps into your bones, and there’s a horrible blocky feeling that wedges itself in the back of your throat as tears sting the back of your eyes.

You don’t know what to say you completely freeze up and you look down at your shaky hands determined not to meet his soft gaze.

“I— I just— I don’t—“ you huff out in frustration when you can’t find the words to describe what you’re feeling, and he gives you an encouraging look, squeezing your hand in reassurance, “I don’t feel very pretty” you mumble feeling a little silly.

But it’s true nonetheless, there’s a loud voice in the back of your head that reminds you constantly of all your flaws it repeats in your mind like a mantra and it curses you until you start believing the horrible words to be true leaving you exhausted.

“Oh, Darlin come here” he whispers his brows knit together in sadness, you rest your head against the crook of his shoulder as his arms engulf you in a loving hug.

He doesn’t really know what to say and he’s completely freaking out on the inside. Tommy doesn’t understand, he thinks you’re an absolute angel, the prettiest person to walk planet earth, and his heart shatters at your words.

“I’m sorry it’s silly— I’m being silly” you sniffle wiping away your tears, and you watch the worry pour into his eyes, how his face is full of concern and it makes you feel guilty.

Tommy shakes his head, “It’s not silly baby, it’s not” he promises his tone is so soft and caring, and he presses a kiss to your forehead, his rough hands gently cupping your warm face.

“Tell me what can I do, how do I help?” He asks, “Anything you name it I’ll do, absolutely anything sweetheart” there’s almost a desperation in his tone and it weaves through his face.

And your heart jumps at his words, and you realize that he cares, of course, he cares it was silly of you to think otherwise, but you know there isn’t anything he can do to stop the horrid thoughts that scratch at the back of your mind, “You just being here is enough for me” you smile wiping the tears that fall from your eyelashes.

He nods softly with a somewhat bashful smile, “You’re beautiful you know? I mean absolutely gorgeous, sweetheart” he smiles with a genuine look in his eyes, as he presses a gentle kiss to the corner of your mouth, and you relax into his side his arm hooking around your shoulders bringing you closer to him, and you feel so loved.

His words bring another wave of tears to your eyes, and you can’t stifle the sob that pushes its way out your mouth, “Hey, don’t cry sweet thing” he mumbles against your head, and he can feel the dampness on his shoulder, his hand rubbing the expanse of your back.

“I’m sorry, I just love you, Tommy, so much” you sniffle and his heart melts at your words.

“I love you too, my pretty angel” he smiles as you let out a breathy giggle, and he wipes your tears away with his thumb before placing gentle kisses all over your face, and you go warm under his soft touch, heart full with happiness.

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☾⋆AN this has been in my notes for a hot minute, enjoy my lovelies!! <33

[yoyomomiko]

How about a Wendy Testaburger fic where (Fem Reader) has a crush on her but was too scared to tell her. Looks like Bebe has to help reader out again lol

Matchmaker

Pairing: Wendy x F!Reader

Summary: Bebe helps you confess to Wendy!

Warnings: None!!

(A/N): Thank you sm for the ask/request, this is the first time i do this and i'm sorry if this doesn't meet your expectations, but i tried! i hope you like it!! ૮₍ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ₎ა

Wendy Testaburger was the smartest girl you knew. And no, it wasn't because everybody that surrounded you was a dumbass, but because she was top tier intelligent.

You started admiring her hard work, and maybe even her beauty...

Every single time there was a class project, you tried your best to partner up with her, and always asked to do the work at her house. And the times when you didn't manage to be her partner, you'd always view her project with attention, sneakily taking glances at her.

Whenever you'd see Stan with her, you felt a little burn in your heart, also emptiness in your stomach. It just felt wrong... Was it jealousy? It was.

It took you some time to realize you had a massive crush on her, always trying to catch a glimpse of her from across the classroom, or at lunch, when you ate with her and the girls at the same table.

Your heart would flutter everytime Wendy would teach you stuff. And oh, did you go crazy when Wendy would fight Cartman...

“Hi girl!”

“No, that goes here. But you're good at this!”

“Great job!”

“Cartman, go pick on someone else, she is off limits!”

“You're such an amazing friend!”

✦•┈๑⋅⋯ ⋯⋅๑┈•✦•┈๑⋅⋯ ⋯⋅๑┈•✦

The school bell rang, signaling lunch break. The hallway flooded with students, as you made your way to the cafateria.

You sat alone at the table. You wear contemplating when and how you were going to confess to Wendy, your best friend and crush for what seemed like forever.

Somebody plopped down next to you, their lunch tray slamming on the table. You slowly traced your eyes up to the person's face, only to see the gosspi queen herself, Bebe.

“Spill the tea.” She leaned close to you, blonde hair bouncing at the sudden movement.

“I don't understand?”

“Don't act like you don't know what i'm talking about. I see the way you look at Wendy, and that is most definetly NOT in a friendly way.” She stated, making your eyebrows raise slightly. Was your crush on Wendy THAT obvious?

“Fine... Yes, yes i like her.” You admited nervously, cheeks flushed a crimson red.

“I knew it! When are you gonna confess?” She asked eagerly, waiting for your response.

“Probably never... I mean, i'm not sure! What if she doesn't like me back, and then she thinks i'm weird or something, and stops being friends with me?!” You covered your face, panicking a bit.

“That won't happen, i'm sure of it.” Bebe reassured you as she patted your back, comforting you. “Listen, you can't bottle up your emotions, you should definetly tell her how you feel!”

“I'd rather die...”

Bebe stared at your face, trying to figure out what emotions you were showing. She shook her head and got up, walking to Wendy's table.

'SHE BETTER NOT' is what you kept repeating in your mind.

You saw Bebe lean over on Wendy's shoulder, then whisper something in her ear. Wendy then glanced at you and smiled slightly, her cheeks tinted a light pink, barely noticable.

She then turned around, and Bebe approached you with a confident smirk. Bebe sat back down next to you, eating her lunch.

“What did you tell her?!” You whisper yelled in panic, making Bebe eye you.

“Relax, i didn't tell her anything. I asked her a question, that's it.”

“Well what did you ask...?” You fidgeted with your fingers under the table, heart pumping a bit too fast.

“I can't tell you. If you wanna find out, ask her to meet up with you after school, at the playground!” Bebe just gave you a smile, while you nodded along.

✦•┈๑⋅⋯ ⋯⋅๑┈•✦•┈๑⋅⋯ ⋯⋅๑┈•✦

All you could think about was how you were gonna ask Wendy such a thing. Would you also confess your feelings that you've kept hidden all this time? You couldn't even focus in class.

Anxiety rushed through your veins as soon as you heard the bell ring, indicating the end of another day at South Park Elementary.

You got up quickly to pack your things before Wendy walked out of the classroom. You glanced around the room, trying to find Wendy. You ended up catching a glimpse of Bebe's grin, making you blush.

The class cleared up as you went up to Wendy.

“Hi girl!” Wendy greeted you.

“Hi, uh, Wendy, can we meet at the playground, before we go home?”

“Sure!” She smiled at you, while you nervously smiled back, mind going crazy.

✦•┈๑⋅⋯ ⋯⋅๑┈•✦•┈๑⋅⋯ ⋯⋅๑┈•✦

You waited and waited, what if she didn't come?

After some time, Wendy finally arrived, wandering over to you.

“What's up? Is somthing wrong?” She asked, looking a bit concerned at the way your face was redder than a tomato.

“I'm fine! I... Wanted to ask you something...”

You haven't thought about this, how should you even form the question?!

“Okay, i know this will sound a little weird, but... What did Bebe ask you? It's not that i really want to know- It's jus that...”

Wendy's cheeks heated up, eyes widening slightly. Your lips felt dry, as you noticed her zone out.

“Bebe... Asked me how i feel about you...” Wendy admited, gaze fixated on you and you only.

“Oh... And what did you say?”

Wendy took a deep breath, searching an answer at the back of her mind, so she doesn't slip out the truth.

“I told her that... You're a cool person. And that you're fun to be around with, and you're really funny, and i think i-”

“Wendy...” You tried catching her attention, wich worked. She quickly snapped her eyes to you, observing your blushing face.

You can do this, just how Bebe told you to...

“Wendy, i think you're the smartest girl i've ever met. You're really sweet and all... But that's not the only thing i admire about you. You're... Well... I like you!” You finally confessed. You felt like running away, hoping that the ground could open up and swallow you whole.

You covered your face in embarassment, blushing harder than ever.

“Sorry i-”

“I like you too.”

You couldn't believe your ears. You peeked slightly from the gap of your fingers, eyes widening.

“You... You do?”

“Of course i do! You're... Possibly the best girl ever, you're a cool best friend, and i truly like you!”

She blushed as well, before you took your hands off of your face completely.

You leaned over to her, eyes scanning her. Her own eyes examined you as well.

“Can... Can i kiss you...?” You asked, and Wendy nodded.

Before you could lean in fully, Wendy pulled you into her and gave you a short and quick kiss.

Even if it didn't last long, it felt amazing.

“So... Are we a thing now?” You asked Wendy, and she nodded her head.

“I say we are. Do you wanna be my girlfriend?”

“Yes! Yes, i do. Do you...?”

“Of course!”

She suddenly kissed your cheek again, and you both started laughing slightly.

✦•┈๑⋅⋯ ⋯⋅๑┈•✦•┈๑⋅⋯ ⋯⋅๑┈•✦

(BONUS):

“Matchmaker is my middle name.”

Bebe stared at the two of you from behind a wall with a proud look, as she then turned around.

“Let's see who's next...”

She pondered quietly to herself looking at the sheet of paper, a list to all the other love birds around the school.

[digital-matchmake]

I’ve seen your AU and I just thought that the digital gang were basically the stick figures from Alan Becker if you heard of him, so I thought someone namely Jax playing some games like Minecraft and the rest just got hooked on it.

Oh geez you've reminded me of this fanfic I made a while ago for shits and giggles but now here have at thee!

(Admittedly I know the stick figures from Alan Becker and watched some of the vs minecraft of them but I never really gotten into it but yeah it's basically that except the characters can get out in the physical world and can only access devices the reader has access on)

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Finally sunday, where you are finally free from your responsibilities for a bit just so you can play games on your computer and for today, your friends are online for a bit so you decided to invite to your minecraft server for a while to just hang out for a bit.

"Ok where should we put our base?" You question onto your mic as you fix your headset a bit, though your question was met with two chuckle from your friends.

"Bruh chill we just started, we haven't even gathered wood yet" One of your friends laugh as the three of you begin to collect wood

"Also when are you going to change your avatar from steve?"

"Idk, probably when I have the time and motivation to create my avatar" You casually answer, leaning back on your seat as you continue to collect wood, it's times like these that you like, just hanging out peacefully with your friends and just having a peac-

*Jax has joined the server*

"Huh? Who the fuck is Jax?"

"I don't know, shit did you guys invite your friend here?"

"Hell nah, I don't know anyone named Jax, (Y/n) do you?"

This is one of those days you are glad you do not have a facecam on, because your face says that you fully know who the hell this is.

"SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT" You interally panic as you try and quickly come up with a response "I uh, I don't know them, did someone managed to leak the server IP?"

Whilst your friends are responding, you look around in minecraft to see him, his avatar basically the same as he is, complete with that shit eating grin as you mute yourself on discord and began to talk to the monitor directly.

"Jax I swear to christ, get out of the server!"

"Aww don't be like that sweetcheeks, I just wanted to see what the fuss is about in this game"

Ohhh his snarky comment combined with his usual nicknamings made you grip your controller as you try to not think about just trying to reach into your monitor and yank him, You can't do that anyway without literally breaking your monitor.

*Ragatha has joined the server*

"Oh shit" You hear Jax say before.

*Jax has left the server*

*Ragatha has left the server*

Oh thank the lord, at least someone saved just in time before your friends began to ask more question as you unmute.

"Sorry I had to check something but it seems all is good now, Now where were we?"

And your game continued without any issues, as you and your friends continue to play, you can ever so slightly hear Ragatha telling Jax off in your living room but it's too muffled for you to understand but now atleast that rabbit man is getting put in his place... again.

-------------

After a while you and your friends wrap up and bid one another farewell as they went offline to which you had call in the digital gang into your monitor, since Jax is curious about the game, you might as well introduce it to them as you start create a new world as they watch in your monitor as you hover your mouse over the name.

"Oh Oh! Let me name it!" Jax says as he reached over to the server name and begin to type 'Hell-' to which you just backspaced it all before he can even finish "Hey!"

"I am not gonna let you name anything, anyone else have a suggestion?"

Andd that was your mistake as they begin to fight over what name it will be, with only Gangle, Ragatha and Pomni not joining in the fight as they talk to one another of ideas, welp this is gonna take a while before you even play the damn game as you stood up from your seat, you are gonna need a drink and maybe a snack for this.

[dragonmasterhiccup]

“Yeah, I’m sure she does.” She knew first hand what Gothi would do if he even thought about getting out of bed. Danny had tried doing the same thing when she was injured, and Gothi did not take well to that, that’s for sure. “Can’t you do something in bed? I dunno, what about… uh…” She trailed off, trying to come up with something that he could do while he was still bedridden, though sadly, nothing came to mind. “S-sorry, I can’t really think of much…” she muttered apologetically.

She looked away, quickly blinking away the oncoming tears so that he wouldn’t notice before looking back up at him, guilt plastered on her features. “That- that was a stupid question, my bad-“ she was cut off by Hiccup’s question.

Her eyes widened abruptly. Oh Gods, was he catching on? Was he figuring it out? And why was she guilty? She knew exactly why she was guilty, but she couldn’t say anything. She would have to take this with her all the way to Valhalla. She didn’t know if she could do that, though, it was weighing her down so much.

She took a quick breath and replied, her voice slightly wobbly. “Yeah, yeah, I know, I guess I’m just still a little shaken up, that’s it.” She had to fight back a gag as he explained that ‘she was the reason that he didn’t bleed out’. If only he knew how wrong he was.

She had started thinking about it once again; Hiccup bleeding out, his blood all over her hands and torso- oh Thor, she can’t do this, she can’t-

Her head snapped back up at Hiccups muttering, and panic seized her in an instant. “Hiccup? What’s going on? Do- do you need Gothi? Is it one of your cuts?” She stood up, kneeling down by his bedside, her hands trembling as the yhovered over him, not knowing what to do.

She was about to call for Gothi, until Hiccup had reopened his eyes and looked over at her. She sighed in relief. “N-no, it’s fine, don’t be sorry, stuff like that happens to me all the time, I get it.”

He pointedly looked at his book. "I can read, I guess? My left arm is okay, I can sketch a bit more..." He shrugged lightly with one shoulder. "I'll find something to do. You could always visit, though. I'll teach you how to play Maces and Talons, if you're interested. As far as everyone else knows, I'm away for a gathering of Chiefs, so, I have to stay hidden until...until I can fly Toothless again. Otherwise, how could I explain why I suddenly need a cane, and I can't fly my dragon? It leads to too many questions."

There was something not quite right about her reaction to his question, but he didn't dwell on it. He was sure that whatever it was, she'd tell him in time.

"No, it's just, we were talking about this not long ago, remember? How Toothless has saved me more times than I could count? Those times...it didn't affect me as much, because I knew I could count on him. Every time, just in time, he or another dragon would be there, get me out of whatever scraps I was in. It just...never got as bad as it did this time. Although... almost drowning does come close..." He trailed off, not sure where he was going with this.

"The thing is, I'm just having trouble reconciling all that happened. I almost can't wrap my mind around it. There's something missing, a crucial piece and I...I don't know if I'll ever figure it out." He sighed.

"Thanks, for understanding. You said it happens to you? What do you do, to get it to stop?" He looked at her, eyes full of questions, needing to know how to stop that anxious feeling from coming back.

[the-shadowsingers-whore]

a court of wards and shadow

chapter three

series overview

summary: aelis finally starts to settle into her new residence when azriel surprises her with an interesting invitation

length: 4.1k

warnings: mentions of anxiety, depression, trauma, and suicidal ideations

disclaimer: this fic in no way represents any of sarah j. maas' work or ideas, it is for purely fictional/personal entertainment purposes

masterlist /// next chapter >>

“oh no! it has nothing to do with lord helion! it’s just that …..” a blush stains my cheeks as i hesitate. i had already been on edge about meeting the high lord of night. even just standing before him now feels like almost too much. and the addition of having to answer his questions while also deciding how to explain my situation without disgracing high lord helion in any way only amplifies my anxiety to the point of near insanity. 

i wring my shaking hands together and stare at my feet as i try to find the right words, my nerves threatening to choke me. just when i feel the edge of panic start to claw it's way up my throat, i notice a twisting cloud of shadow weave its way around my ankles. i swear it’s as though i can actually feel it brush against me. that little bit of moving darkness distracts me from my nerves just enough to find words again. 

“it's just that some of the lower members of his court have more…..unsavory hobbies. and as a kitchen maid and serving girl i have little choice but to comply.”

i avert my eyes and stare at the floor, too embarrassed to look at him after my admission. as my gaze drops, i see an expression flash across the high lord’s face, telling me he understands enough of what i’m suggesting without me having to explain further. “i see,” he says slowly and carefully before pausing to contemplate the situation. 

the silence, although short, is enough to push my already fried nerves to the breaking point and i start rambling, my words thick with desperation. "and i know i'm asking for a lot by requesting to stay here and that it probably goes against all sorts of court politics and policies, but i just can't go back. and please don't feel like you need to trouble yourself with me, i can figure things out on my own, all i ask is that you please just don't send me back. please-"

the high lord holds up a hand in silent request and i immediately quiet. my cheeks heat with embarrassment over my outburst and i bow my head in supplication, mortified by my outburst. “i am so sorry my lord, i forget myself."

"oh it’s quite alright," he says, a gentle laugh following his words. “well," he pauses for a moment to glance at azriel who nods his head ever so slightly in response. "i think that with all things considered i am not opposed to you temporarily remaining in the night court.”

"oh thank you my lord, truly thank you." i reply meekily, trying my best to suppress the outburst of overwhelming relief flooding my body. 

"i will have nuawalla and cerridwan set up a room down the hall. i know the court of nightmares isn't exactly the most welcoming, but i will ensure your quarters are as from from--" 

“rhys?” azriel’s low voice interrupts and i shift my attention to him. he stands with his hands held loosely behind his back, his face void of any expression. “might i suggest we allow her to stay with the priestesses?”

“you mean in the…” the high lord’s voice trails off and azriel nods in response. “i don’t know if that’s a good idea.” a tense quiet fills the room and i glance between the two, watching them engage in some sort of silent conversation. after a few moments the high lord directs his attention back to me and i hold my breath, terrified of what he will say next.

"i will admit, your situation is a little more…. unique than the other females who have been offered refuge in… the night court, especially considering it's only temporary. but, i will allow it. on one condition." nervousness coils once more in my stomach at the serious tone in his voice. "wherever you find yourself next, you must never speak a word of what you experience during your time here in the night court."

"yes my lord, of course," i quickly reply, willing to comply with his simple, albeit slightly strange, request if it means i won’t have to return to the day court. 

"and none of this 'my lord' nonsense," he quips, waving his hand dismissively when i start to protest. "please, call me rhysand." 

* * *

i shift back and forth on my feet, my hands fidgeting with the edge of my tunic nervously. i glance around the balcony again, as i've done over and over for the last few minutes while waiting for azriel. after our meeting, nuawalla brought me here so azriel could speak privately with the high lord about the details of our arrangement. 

i hear a rustling behind me and turn to find azriel approaching. my eyes search his face for some hint about his conversation, but his expression remains neutral. before i have a chance to let my thoughts run away with me, he speaks, reaching out a hand towards me. "ready?" 

my confusion must show on my face because he continues before i have a chance to voice my question aloud. "the priestesses you will be staying with live in a sanctuary deep in the night court. within velaris to be more precise, a city that was kept hidden and secret for thousands of years. only recently, after an attack from hybern during the war, did the other courts learn about it's existence. it's the most precious part of the night court and we protect it at all costs." 

he pauses his explanation and my mind reels as i realize what he's implying. i will be completely safe here. no one will be able to reach me. despite the comfort in that revelation, i don’t miss the heavy implications lacing his tone. while there i will be protected, but once i leave they won’t hesitate to protect velaris against me if i fail to guard it’s secrets.

"we will shadow travel most of the way there," he continues, "but i will have to fly us into the sanctuary itself as there are wards that protect against winnowing and other magic."

my heart races at the thought of flying again, but my mind snags on the other words he said. "shadow travel?" 

"ahh…. yes." a strange expression crosses his face before he schools it back to neutrality and i get the sense that he did not mean to reveal that information to me. "it's an aspect of my… " he hesitates, gesturing towards the shadows twirling around him as he struggles to find the right words. "of my magic. it works similarly to winnowing, but i move through the shadows." 

"oh," i reply, voice full of awe as i watch one of the shadows slither across the ground to dance at my feet. my gaze never leaves the dark cloud bouncing in front of me as i ask my next question. "does it….. what does it feel like?" 

a small chuckle floats through the space between us and my eyes flick up to his for a moment. "you'll see," he replies, a playfulness lightening his voice. 

he extends his hand to me once more and i pause for a moment before reaching out to take it. even though i'm expecting it, the brush of his skin against mine still startles me and i fight the urge to tense up when he takes a step closer. 

"hold on tight," he murmurs in warning a moment before the shadows envelop us and the world goes black. for a moment i can see nothing, and the scent of rain fills my nose for a brief second. all i feel in the darkness is a pleasant warmth wrapped around me, like a comforting embrace. 

and then i'm blinking as the bright light of day fills my vision. i find myself on the top of a roof with a small garden and i release azriel’s hand to spin in a slow circle, taking in the sight of the city around me. he allows me to look for a few moments before interrupting. 

"i should get you to the library to meet the priestesses before the day gets too much later. i promise there will be plenty of time to see the city in the future," he adds when he notes the disappointment on my face. 

i nod in agreement and he steps closer, moving his arms around my back to scoop me up. my entire body involuntarily freezes at his touch and he pauses, pulling back. i know he is only trying to pick me up for the flight, but i can't help the way every muscle is locking up. 

"i'm sorry, i was only--" 

"no, it's okay," i interrupt before he can apologize further. i shake my head, trying to loosen up my body and dispel the panic shooting through my veins. after a moment i look back up at him, an embarrassed flush rising to my cheeks. "i'm okay." 

"are you sure? we can wait if--" 

"no, i'm okay. i'm good," i emphasize the words in an effort not only to convince him, but also myself. 

he evaluates me for a moment before stepping closer once more, cautiously scooping me into his arms. i consciously fight every instinct in my body to keep from tensing up beneath his touch. but then his huge wings spread and flap and suddenly we are no longer standing on the roof. the second i feel the rush of the wind against my face, my body relaxes, the chilly air soothing my nerves. 

my eyes dart about as he takes us through the sky, trying to take everything in all at once. i had been in this position once before, but my injuries robbed me of truly enjoying the whole experience. and oh what a crime that was. i want to close my eyes and focus on the feeling of the wind as it whips across my body, but at the same time i want to keep them open forever and watch the earth fly by far beneath me. 

the journey isn't long and before i know it, azriel is settling me back onto my feet. 

"most people tend to scream a bit more during their first flight," he says, the corners of his lips turning up ever so slightly as he takes in the broad smile on my face.

"why?" i reply breathlessly, my mind and body still riding the high from flying." i mean i just don't understand how…… it's just that……when you're up there, how… " i laugh as i struggle to find the words to express the experience. "it was just so exhilarating. i've never felt something like that before. it felt so, so free." 

a blush tints my cheeks as i come back into myself. here i am stumbling over myself and gushing about something he has done every day for basically his entire life. i probably sound ridiculous. 

but azriel surprises me by responding in an almost melancholic tone, "yes, nothing feels quite as freeing as flying." a far off look enters his eyes for a moment but i only catch a glimpse before he shakes it off and turns towards the doorway of the balcony we landed on, gesturing inside the house with a sweep of his hand. 

"welcome to the house of wind, aelis." 

he leads me through an endless series of winding hallways and corridors that i don't think i will ever be able to keep track of. along the way he gives me a brief explanation of the library he's taking me to as well as the general nature of those residing within. 

eventually we arrive and he introduces me to clotho, the priestess who is in charge of the library. he doesn't say much else before departing to attend to some court business 

the priestess leads me on a silent tour through the library, showing me all the relevant rooms, ending with the one i will be staying in. despite her inability to speak, i find that i have no problem understanding her. in fact, i find the quiet of her presence oddly comforting.

after acknowledging my thank you for the tour with a silent nod, clotho departs, leaving me to settle in. as soon as i close the door behind me, exhaustion starts to settle into my body, the last few days finally catching up with me. i collapse onto the small, but comfortable bed, sighing heavily. a glance out the little window shows that the sun is still far from setting, but i can't find it in me to stay awake any longer. i close my eyes, the tiredness in my bones dragging me into a deep sleep. 

* * *

i jolt awake to a soft knocking on the door and bolt upright in bed, glancing around wildly at the unfamiliar room. after a moment, i remember where i am and take a few steadying breaths. 

i hear whoever is outside my room rap on the door softly once more before gently cracking it. azriel peaks his head inside and then opens the door further, stepping inside once he confirms i am awake. 

"sorry if i startled you," he murmurs softly. "i stopped by to check in and clotho told me you never came to dinner. i assumed you probably fell asleep and thought i would bring you some food." 

he gestures to the full tray in his hands and my eyes widen slightly. i remain silent, too stunned by his thoughtfulness to respond.

"i’m sorry, i shouldn't have just barged in here. i'm sure this is all very overwhelming and you probably just wanted to be left alone." 

"no, no, it's alright!" i interrupt, having finally found my words. "sorry, i was just surprised that you brought me food. it's just so kind and thoughtful. i’ve never…… i’m not used to…." my words trail off and die in my throat. 

he offers me a gentle smile as he crosses the room and sets the tray on the little table near my bed. "don't worry about it, it was no trouble at all. enjoy." and with that he bows his head slightly and excuses himself from the room. 

* * *

the following days and weeks pass quickly and uneventfully, with me helping out around the library and filling my time with cleaning every neglected nook and cranny. clotho keeps insisting it’s unnecessary, that i’m here to rest and find peace, but I can’t help myself. i don't want to feel like i'm taking advantage of their generosity, i want to earn my keep. 

not to mention this incessant gnawing beneath my skin, this sense that i don't belong here. no matter how kind or welcoming the other priestesses are i continue to feel on edge around them, like an outsider, an imposter. keeping busy helps me bury that feeling, helps me focus on something else instead of dwelling in my thoughts.

this particular afternoon finds me on my hands and knees, scrubbing dust away from some shelves tucked away in a dark corner that probably hasn't been touched in decades. i lean back on my heels to wipe some sweat from my brow when i hear footsteps approaching. turning, i’m surprised to find azriel standing a few feet away. 

from what i’ve gathered during my time here, he rarely enters the library itself, much less coming this far into its depths. and i haven't seen him in over a week since i last ran into him in passing while he was escorting some of the priestesses back from training. 

"hi," i manage to say after a moment. 

"hello, aelis." he replies while stepping closer and extending his hand to help me up. "i didn't expect to find you so deep in the library. not many venture quite this far." 

i hesitate for a moment before taking his hand, suppressing the shudder that threatens to ripple through me at the memories that flash through my head at the feeling of his rough skin against mine. 

gently, he pulls me up, then takes a small step back as he releases my hand, putting a respectful distance between us. 

"i guess i didn't notice how far in i was. i must have gotten distracted by the trail of dirty shelves." i chuckle softly, the lie rolling easily off my tongue. in truth, i like to come down here to escape the prying questions of some of the nosier priestesses. i guess it's not everyday that a serving girl from a foreign court seeks refuge amongst them. and as much as i understand their intrigue and questioning, i have no desire to unpack all the burdens of my past now that i have finally started to bury them. 

if azriel notices my lie, he doesn’t let on, choosing to simply continue our conversation, his tone light, bordering on playful. "and what could possibly possess you to want to scrub the grime off the depths of the library all day? i know it's not a task from clotho, she tends to prefer people gather and organize the endless stream of books she's always pouring through." 

"just trying to keep busy." i respond and a knowing look crosses his face, but he doesn't asks questions like i assumed he might. instead his lips tilt up slightly and his eyes brighten as he teases, "i can see that." he gestures to my forehead. i immediately reach up to touch it, a questioning look on my face. when a breath of laughter escapes him i realize that i've only managed to further smear the dust and dirt from the shelves across my sweaty skin. 

he takes a step towards me before pausing. "ummm, may i?" he asks quietly, reaching into some hidden pocket of his leathers for a handkerchief. 

my eyes widen slightly as i pick up on his meaning, but for some reason i still find myself nodding in agreement. he takes another careful step towards me before slowly reaching up and gently wiping the dirt away from my brow. 

his fingers linger for a moment before he lowers his hand, but this time he doesn't step away. his eyes flick over my face, assessing every inch before finally speaking. "there you are." 

his low baritone rumbles softly through the air between us and wraps around me. i don't dare breath, afraid to disrupt whatever silent force has settled around us. we stare at each other and i feel myself getting lost in the depths of his hazel eyes, wondering about all the secrets they hold. suddenly he averts his gaze and steps away. i lose the breathe i had been holding and shake my head to clear my thoughts. 

"well," he says after clearing his throat and taking another step back. he turns to gesture towards the way up and out of the library. "i did come down here with an actual purpose. i have something to show you." 

i nod in response before following him, unable to form actual words as i think about his rough hands gently cleaning my forehead or about how close he was standing. and how neither of those things bothered me like they would have if anyone else did them. 

as we walk i continue to ponder how odd it is that i feel so at ease around azriel as compared to everyone else i’ve met here. or anyone else i've ever been around for that matter. there's nothing really inherently different about him, but somehow i don’t feel the same nervous energy that fills me when i’m around others. i don’t feel tense or on edge in his presence, just a quiet sense of calm that i can’t quite understand. 

i sneak a glance at azriel while i follow him through the house and suppress the urge to laugh at the ridiculousness of the situation. this deadly warrior, covered in more weapons than i can count is the one thing in this strange place who doesn't scare me. not the gentle priestesses who have provided for me and  shown me nothing but kindness. not the high lady and her joyful toddler who bring by decadent treats and art supplies. not even the cats that seem to harmlessly roam the library. no, it's the dark male wrapped in shadows with few words and even fewer expressions that makes me feel truly safe and at ease. 

* * *

after following him through more twists and turns than i can keep track of, we finally step through a set of doors onto a large balcony. i pause in the threshold as my eyes scan the space, taking in the sight in front of me. 

the space in front of me is set up as a training ring. scattered throughout it in various groups and formations are the priestesses, most of whom i at least somewhat recognize from the library. some are training in their robes while others are in fighting leathers, not too unlike the ones azriel wears. 

i recognize nesta leading a group through some balancing routines while cassian teaches another group about sword maneuvers. a redhead i remember seeing once in passing is leading a few priestesses through what looks to be an absolutely brutal core workout. 

my eyes flick around the space, taking everything in. i had known that quite a few of the priestesses were participating in some sort of training, but i had no idea it was so….. intense. 

"so what do you think?" azriel’s voice startles me and i jump slightly. i was so mesmerized by watching the training that i completely forgot i didn’t come here alone. 

"it's….. wow." 

"most of the priestesses are here every day. same with nesta, gwyn, and emerie, they lead a lot of the training. cass and i come and help when we can." azriel explains as i continue to watch, eyes bouncing between the different groups. 

"i….i don't know what to say. i’ve never seen so many females training like this before. i would have never imagined……." 

"the training’s almost over today, but don't worry. if you come by after lunch tomorrow we can get you started." 

those words are enough to finally pull my gaze from the priestesses sparring. 

"what?" i ask, confusion tinting my voice. "get started with what?" 

"your training of course." azriel says the words so matter-of-factly, as if they weren't the most confounding thing i have ever heard. 

"oh no, i couldn't possibly--"

"why not? they are all doing it." he nods his head in the direction of the training ring and the dozen or so priestesses scattered throughout. 

"but i'm not like them, i'm…." my words trail off and die on my lips. i’m not supposed to be here. i’m not supposed to be alive. but, i can’t say that. i can’t admit that ugly truth to him. so instead, “i'm just a kitchen maid. a serving girl. and a lowly one at that. what right do i have to train with all these powerful, incredible females? 

"you're what?" azriel asks gently, a knowing yet sympathetic expression on his face. "a female who has been through something terrible and survived? every single one of them has a story of their lives before they came here. some too terrible to speak aloud. but, they all survived and eventually made it here, to this training ring. and now they come here everyday, not only to grow stronger and learn to defend themselves, but also as a way to heal."

the difference is, they wanted to survive. that realization wraps around my heart like an icy blanket as guilt and shame roll in my gut. all of these priestesses training in front of me have been through horrific trauma and are here fighting every day to grow stronger, to survive. i’m here because i’m a coward. a broken, pathetic coward.

i turn away from the training ring, unable to watch any longer. i can’t train with these female. i don’t deserve to. 

he pauses for a moment and it takes everything in me to force the emotion off of my face before he is able to see how broken i truly am. "no one is going to make you  join them. it is entirely up to you. but from what i saw on that mountain, you are a fighter, you don't give up easily." if he only knew. "so just know that this ring is always here and you are always welcome. it would probably be a better use of your time then scrubbing dirt from shelves no one has touched in decades. "

and with that he turns and gestures back inside, wordlessly guiding me back to my room in the library before leaving me to think. 

next chapter>>

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