#Like yes her problem is that she doesn’t get to be a shitty person bc of how she looks
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I feel like BH6 the Series could have REALLY handled Karmi better than they did.
They could’ve given her a MUCH more interesting backstory, if she was there the year before (which she would have HAD to be if being the youngest at SFIT was originally her thing) she could have had a very interesting relationship with Tadashi and Callaghan where Callaghan (the dean of students as well as a professor, much like Granville) was much more interested in Baymax than in her work. And it’s not even like Granville because she has the excuse that she’s paying more attention to Hiro because he’s 14 and at college, Callaghan was picking a 20 year old Tadashi over a 15 year old Karmi just bc he’s a robotics student.
And now that Granville’s here, she’s ALSO paying attention to the robotics (and other non-bio) majors over her. Which, as a viewer, is understandable bc Granville herself is more aligned with robotics and tech than biology, but that still doesn’t give her any right to just ignore the other literal child just because she’s a biotech major and she isn’t going to accidentally blow the whole lab up. Granville just dumped Hiro onto Karmi hoping they’d get along, thinking she was unaware of the blatant favoritism going on, hoping Hiro would just adopt her into the nerd gang and make things easier. Granville was completely aware of Karmi’s utter lack of friends and connection from both her peers and any authority figures, and still decided that she didn’t deserve a mentor as much as Hiro did. Which yeah, the bio department should have paid attention to Karmi, but can the fucking dean of students pay attention to more than one genius child at a time? The answer is yes, Granville is fully capable of mentoring more than one student to be functional and ethical people who won’t blow up labs, fight each other, make killer pathogens, or make energy amplifiers.
Meanwhile, Granville didn’t know that the catalyst behind that entire friend group coming together was Tadashi, but Karmi knows this fact very well. She doesn’t want to be with the dead golden boy’s friends and she doesn’t want to be with the new golden boy either. The nerd gang probably wouldn’t want to hang out with Karmi either because she was probably standoffish towards Tadashi too. Or at least, she didn’t acknowledge him if he tried to welcome her into his group. Honey Lemon is probably the only person she would willingly hang out with and talk to (I don’t think anyone can resist her good vibes), Granville should’ve sent her rather than Hiro. Sending Hiro was like rubbing it into her face that she’s not the youngest anymore when it was all she had going for her, even thought Granville didn’t mean that.
Like, they had something good going there with the initial rivalry. Karmi blaming Hiro for Granville favoring him because he’s almost exactly like her old protégé is absolutely understandable. Karmi didn’t know any of Granville’s backstory and probably just thought it was because he’s younger and a robotics major, not because of the whole ‘being very similar to Obake’ thing. But that shit should have been resolved in Season 1. More specifically, in S1 episode 19. She should have had an epiphany in S1 ep 17 that “yeah, Hiro’s not an asshole, Granville and Callaghan had a problem with favoritism of robotics students over everyone else and I should just be fucking mature about it and take it up with Granville instead of picking fights with a 14-year-old over something he has no part in.” They did NOT need to stretch that into S2.
Karmi didn’t deserve to be the series’ punching bag, and she doesn’t deserve to be the fandom’s punching bag either. She’s 16 and at SFIT, she’s just a kid herself, give her a damn break. Of course she’s not going to be emotionally mature about authority figures she deeply respects constantly picking other people over her just bc of their major. She’s 16, of course she’s going to have crushes and write shitty fanfiction, what else do teenagers do?
She’s not some irredeemable bitch, she’s 16 and got fucked over by everyone, the characters, the show, and the fandom.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/f8c5a264be7e3565c734bc5975895d4d/95f61c87ab13ba9a-bb/s540x810/64c9a98e5af4c74c263c0e8074974b98e6ee9093.jpg)
look at her. she deserved so much better.
#nyx rants about bh6#karmi deserved better#big hero 6 the series#big hero 6#bh6 karmi#karmi#bh6 the series#hiro hamada#bh6 hiro#bh6 professor granville#professor granville#long post
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the way they had the todofam kinda jump him and downplay his trauma too. your brother was the first abused child, almost died and was experimented on while he was unconscious for three years and ran away when he found that his father wasn’t going to change. who knows what else he experimented while being homeless as a teen/young adult. from his clothes and his medical conditions, we can tell that life hasn’t been going great for him. that and he only sees himself as an extension of endeavor—he doesn’t seem himself as a real person with his own identity but just another form of endeavor.
“we need more complex characters!” you can’t even handle dabi who is one of the most complex characters in bnha. it’s the way everyone else gets a pass but dabi? he’s just as much of a victim as shigaraki, toga, twice, the l.o.v as a whole, but he’s the only character i’ve seen who is constantly invalidated because his “responses aren’t the correct ones.”
So sorry this took so long to respond to
Fr though. Mha hasn't done a great job in handling heavier topics like child abuse and whatnot but especially with the todofam and more specifically Touya they really dropped the ball. I've disliked this current arc in the manga for a number of reasons, but the major thing is just how they handled the todofam plot. Why is Touya treated like hes the root of the family's problems? Why does the whole family act like hes a child throwing a fit for no reason? Then the whole thing with him telling Shouto he was basically kidnapped and experimented on while in a coma for three years then came back home to find the family thought he was dead, moved on from him, and nothing changed so he just basically disappeared to be homeless in the streets for like seven years and Shouto basically went "cool story bro but it doesn't mean you can kill people." And didn't react beyond that? Because what the fuck. Shouto might be the only person that can even SEMI understand some of what Touya went through and you'd think he'd be able to understand and relate to what Touya's feeling and be more sympathetic towards him but he's just... Not. Again, the whole family is kinda just acting like Touya's causing problems and being a bother. It's just... Not good writing.
Especially frustrates me bc the other two of the villain trio are met with compassion and understanding, Toga's fight was resolved too quickly and her sacrificing herself was kinda a shitty writing choice and she is understood and accepted by the end of the fight, and gets a sense of closure. Shigaraki is also sympathized with and reached out to by Izuku, and even got closure from Nana with that one scene, snd hes done arguably the worst things in the series but has still been met with compassion and sympathy and is recognized as a victim by both fandom and narrative/character. 90% of the time Touya isn't even recognized as a victim or shown any kind of compassion at all. Even the bare minimum. It's just kinda fucked up especially when looking at the other two because yes imho Touya's a more complex character than both Toga and Shigaraki (don't kill me but it's true) but their characters were both given closure for their arcs and/or understanding and sympathy, and their traumas are validated and handled pretty well so like... Why not Dabi then?
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TCL 3x03 thoughts
Many thoughts and spoilers, as usual.
The Main things:
Given the timeframe with Fi’s journey back (and needing her in time for the Child Protective Services meeting), it can’t have been more than a day or two since the last episode.
The reappearance of Adan’s name in the credits was very confusing until Russo produced the video. I’m pretty used to the body double use now (managed to not even cry at the sight of my boy, which I'll take as progress) so my main thoughts about the vid were that it looks just like a scene from a fic idea I had last week that did make me cry, and also that if the footage is from a police body cam, I’m guessing that cop is dead/unconscious and slumped against their own vehicle given the angle and the fact they’re not moving…
Calling it right now, ‘Jeremy the handyman’ is undercover FBI. Russo is smart enough and determined enough not to put all her eggs in the Nadia basket, so I think that this is her other plan to take Thony (and through her, Arman) down. And as she later tells Nadia: nothing is ever as it seems. So I'm convinced the racist attack on the Cleaning Ladies office was fabricated by the FBI to allow ‘Jeremy’ to be introduced into Thony’s life in a way that would lead her to trust him quickly and allow him into her circle, especially with his kindness and all his sentiments about the shittiness of xenophobia and how ‘this is her home, no matter what anyone says’. I’m actually genuinely pissed about it tbh, bc Thony deserves that kindness and support for real, instead of having her isolation and fear and vulnerability preyed upon by people who want to throw her behind bars just because she didn’t play by the rules of their flawed and biased system…
Sigh honestly though, Thony is too stubborn and short-sighted for her own good. Like yes she saved Soledad’s life by ignoring Dante’s orders, but in doing so she risked her own life as well as Fi and Chris’ lives, and also jeopardised her relationship with both Ramona and the CPS worker who is responsible for deciding if Luca should be taken from her or not. At least she’s written consistently in that she always tries to do the ‘right thing’ and save the person in front of her, but that means she often overlooks the potential consequences of taking that action and the overall balance of good vs bad that would come out of it. Like I’m guessing she’s one of those people who absolutely hates the Trolley Problem lol
Well now we know how Paolo’s money comes into play… funny that if he’d never given Chris the money, Chris wouldn’t have been able to give it to Camila and her mum, which means they wouldn’t have come on the crossing, so he would have never had to fight the guy to defend Camila, and wouldn’t have ended up getting stranded in the desert…. Again, this show really is great at demonstrating those ‘well-intentioned actions leading to bad outcomes’ moments
This ep is really trying to give Jorge a bit more depth, from him being all cute about Violeta’s soccer practice (showing he’s an involved dad who is also laid back and knows how to have fun, not one of those intense/pushy ones), and how his warnings to Thony have become less like threats and more like well-meaning advice. He’s willingly acting as Thony’s chauffeur rather than sending an underling to do it, and he’s also letting her debate with him on a more even level than before, where previously he just shut her down immediately. He even actually seems to listen to her about not hurting Nadia and the idea of letting Ramona meet Nadia instead (given what we see in the trailer). The scene where he finds her with the van is likely meant to look like he is hiding something, but I think he is genuinely looking for Arman and actually didn’t know that this was the van that took him, and he just doesn’t trust her enough yet to be open with her about it. I also think he respects that she cares enough about Arman to stand up to him, to challenge him about his possible involvement– if I’m right and he truly is trying to bring Arman home safe, her persistent loyalty to Arman even in the face of danger to herself would be a big point in her favour.
Okay what the hell is the little glass jar Thony finds, though?? Something of Arman’s? Something that they can get a bad guy’s fingerprints off of to give them a lead? A sedative medication that indicates he was drugged and taken somewhere, rather than killed and dumped?? I need answerssss
Poor Nadia is suffering through feelings of betrayal on all sides here lol. I don’t blame her at all for going to Russo and trying to save herself and Arman through a deal, but I’m so relieved that Russo’s obsession with punishing Arman has made that alliance an impossibility. Now all we need is for Nadia to cool down a little, and realise that despite everything, there’s only one person she can truly turn to… (and yes, I’ve written a fic about it lol)
“You ever notice that everyone around him turns up dead?” lollll look at this show being all self-aware about its tendency to just kill off its problems haha. But still, Russo’s got it all wrong; Arman’s not the common denominator here. He may have been the one pulling the trigger a few times, but he was almost never the one actually setting the events in motion. Instead, it’s Thony. Despite being someone who tries at all times to save lives, Thony is like an unintentional angel of death for those she encounters, and sadly Arman is going to be the next to fall.
Other stuff:
It was interesting to see how clever the cartel is with all the different types of vehicles they use to transport people in order to avoid suspicion, I wonder how realistic that is?
I love that the show has continued its tradition of having cleaners/household staff regularly appearing in the background, highlighting the fact that even if they’re often overlooked, they’re there
The date on the bodycam is messing with my timeframe for the show based on the only other previous reference to dates that we’ve gotten, and though I know they probably just picked a random date, I don’t like it haha
That was very cool imagery with Ramona’s tea, of something shrivelled and dull being put into an intense environment and blossoming into something amazing… hmmm, wonder what they’re trying to say about Thony there haha
Fi totally ships Chris and Camila lol. I love the bond that formed between the two families (Fi protecting them in the store by putting on the Southern Belle act was awesome), and I hope Camila and her mum continue to be in the show, like maybe Fi and Thony could hire the mum as one of their cleaners and help both of them settle into life as an immigrant in the US.
Also, the ICE raid was hard to watch, but bless the ladies in the store who helped them to hide! True allies!
The emotional song playing at the end as Fi and Chris are left behind is called 'Sister, Take My Hand' which just feels fitting for this show
Anyway, really looking forward to the Nadia & Ramona meeting next week. My wild dream of a badass coalition of mob women (Thony, Fi, Nadia, Ramona) running Vegas may just happen yet…
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Seems you have problems with Amity so how come you ain't a fan of her?
okay lemme take a deep breath and gather up my receipts. hope you’re ready for a whole fucking essay.
do i think her designs cute? yeah sure. she’s adorable. and marketable. easy to slap on disney social media posts during pride month.
do i like that her attraction to girls is treated as good and natural and not scary? yes. for the owl house’s message, and helping kids grow up without thinking they’re monsters, this is good.
okay now that i’ve pointed out the good, lemme tell you why i hate her.
and this got too long so here’s the shortened version. the reasons she most rubs me the wrong way. and it’s still too fucking long lol
1. first things first. she’s the hexsquad’s bully. she was horrible to willow and luz and she never really puts in the work to make up for this. well. she does for luz. not willow, however. her main victim.
AMITYS VERY FIRST APPEARANCE IS TREATING WILLOW LIKE SHIT AND DESTROYING HER CONFIDENCE. WITH NO PROVOCATION. okay? and then that episode ends with ames trying to get luz dissected.
it’s not even an “amity let bosha, her best friend that she replaced willow with, terrorize willow and thus is responsible as a bystander” situation. no, amity is shown personally going out of her way to be an asshole.
and then in that fucking library episode she says “i know what you are now, luz. you’re a bully!” like bitch?? excuse me? you were literally regular and cyber bullying luz and willow in the episode previous to it. literally she bullies them and then the very next episode calls luz a bully (for some shit her siblings were doing, not even luz)
and then she just assimilates herself back into the friend group, as if nothing happened. willow and gus tolerate it bc they’re not assholes. but the tension is there. on screen even.
like that whole hair braiding scene. wtf was that. amity braiding willows hair does not make up for years of her making willows life a living hell. willow frowns while it happens. and the whole reason amity even came to talk to willow in the first place was to talk about luz. she is only there bc she needs something. it was all about her relationship with luz, not willow.
i know i’ve said this many times before but i think willow should get to clock amity in the jaw. at least once.
and willow should’ve been fucking pissed when luz started getting romantically involved with amity. luz and willow should’ve had a fight about it.
they call back to the tension again in “thanks to them”. the scene in the museum. they feel the need to have to reassure the audience that things are fine between the kids, totally no tension at all. you know bc amity hasn’t actually apologized and they just sort of swept everything she did under the rug.
(another part of “thanks to them” when she tells hunter to go change his silly outfit. not an egregious sin but it’s still mean.)
“understanding willow” wasn’t enough. all amity does it throw out her little sob story excuse for first abandoning willow and then bullying her. probably only bc luz was there to make her feel bad about all of it. which is not a proper apology. WHICH LEADS ME TO MY NEXT POINT.
2. and here’s where it gets personal. amity’s sob story is that she has shitty parents. cool. me too. and i ain’t ever bullied anyone bc of it.
i’ve got literally the same parents. a manipulative control-freak mother and a father who just sorta lets her terrorize his children and make all the family’s decisions bc he’s too busy or scared of her to care. all the same pressure to do perfectly at school and weird fixation on my hair, even, and i’m just fine. my mother belittling me every time i breathed didn’t make me feel the need to make other kids’ lives miserable. get better coping mechanisms.
and i know the “amity doesn’t even try to fight it when her mother gets the hexsquad expelled in ‘escaping expulsion’” thing is a reason other people don’t like amity for, but no i understand this one. i would’ve been too afraid to cross my mother too. so she gets a pass on that ig
oh and mentioning that ep, bonus round. 3. that scene where she walks into her house and immediately throws her clothes on the floor for the butler to pick up pisses me off
sigh. it’s not that i think people can’t change, in fact i’d be perfectly fine with her if she actually made things right with willow. i just wish she would’ve. on-screen.
#okay now i’ve laid most of it out lol#asks#amity blight#fisher.txt#long post#tbh i say i hate her but i kinda don’t sometimes. i contain multitudes
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Ok this hasn’t been asked abt BUT
I got OrangeJuiceVerse Stan on the brain (again)
Specifically in terms of his protectiveness.
In the last OJV ask I got I mentioned that he and Kyle have the most parental tendencies of the Star Seven, and boy oh boy do I have some thoughts on Stan’s knight in shining armor complex!
I won’t get into the Kyle part of that bc 1) I have talked wayyyy too much abt that on ao3 and here, and 2) that’s a whole separate long ass post and I would probably combust.
But!!! First focusing on the M5:
So growing up together they were all generally referred to as “Stan’s Gang”, which he was like wait why are they my gang but then he grew to love that bc they were his people. He loves them with all of his soul (ojverse Stan is a lover for sure) and he is EXTREMELY protective of everyone and kind of (smh this man) sees himself as the dad of the crew. Done with everyone’s bs, the “fun” parent. A lot of that comes from his resentment of Randy, his desire to keep everyone out of true danger and not be flaky despite his own problems. This is especially poignant with Kenny.
So Stan and Kyle VERY much see Kenny as “their egg” (yes I’m borrowing from the “Stan is a protective father” note of that episode) and they really look out for him growing up bc of his shitty home life. Really all of the M5 have a soft spot for Ken, but Stan and Kenny understand each other on a spiritual level. Though Stan doesn’t consciously know abt Kenny’s immortality and IS his Ride Or Die Disaster Bi in all things reckless, the second something goes wrong he’s there, swooping in and reminding him that “yeah you can be a crazy bastard, but don’t you dare die”. He’s less overbearing than Ky gets when Kenny gets hurt, but he’s there to be like “hey man you’re good, you gotta be careful tho”. He was the first to INSIST that he pay kenny in full for his art and commissions stuff regularly through their entire lives.
With Marj, it’s really, really complex. I mentioned before in my OJV Stan hcs (thank you to the wife for that ask btw) that he was the first person she went to when she realized she was a girl! Bc he’s always been pretty emotionally honest and accepting of everything, and she was dealing with her crush on Kenny too and Stan notoriously THINKS he’s slick in being a massive simp so two birds one stone lmao. He was pretty clueless at first but that protective instinct kicked in and he was like GIRL WE GONNA FIND YOU SOME RESOURCES! Also, I’ll do a post abt how NO ONE in the OJV Star Seven is neurotypical soon, but i briefly mentioned in The Wacky Adventures of Craig And Kyle that Marjorine has the ‘tism as well, and Stan is NOT the person to go to when you’re having a meltdown, but rest assured he WILL get you to someone who is. Like she can tell him “Stan I’m feelin a little…” and he will IMMEDIATELY find her Kenny or Kyle. Kyle’s obviously his go to when things are out of his emotional scope, and that extends to Craig later down the line.
So TWEEK!!! Oh god Tweek and Stan’s relationship in the OrangeJuiceVerse is so important to me. They’re the first encounter of the Broken Bottles Quartet, and that moment when Kyle figures out about Tweek’s problem, Stan was full man-with-the-plan mode about how to help him! Before he takes Tweek to AA, he’s at ye ol’ meetin’ hall talking to the old geezers in the local group and it’s like:
“Hey, Stanny Boy, good to see you back, how you healin up (smh I did break his ribs for good reason I promise) got anything to share?” “Actually yeah, I’m gonna bring someone with me in a few days, but you guys HAVE to give him space he gets really nervous.” And the longtime AA peeps who are prone to being overly friendly back off and let Tweek just listen that first time, and Stan is consistently checking in and with Stan’s support Tweek slowly gets more comfortable, and Stan is SO fucking proud of him and he’s his sponsor for a LONG ASS TIME before he officially is.
As for Cartman, once he moves away, Stan will call him up pretty frequently to check in, like “hey fatass how’s the wedding planning company coming?” “Fuck off, hippie did you get the-“ “YES I got the beef jerky club membership quit sending me that shit” “heh, sweet.” “Asshole, but seriously are you doing okay?” “Yes you photosynthesizing dildo. The Jew looks tired in his last facebook post check on him” “I got him, Cartman” “you guys are assholes” “we love you too” “gross” smh theyre so unserious.
But yeah that’s this episode of me not shutting tf up abt OrangeJuiceVerse
#south park#bruh what is wrong with me#headcanons#my shit#stannnn#my baby boy#stan marsh#style#lmm voice: look at my son#ao3#ao3 shit#OrangeJuiceVerse#ojv
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i think i come across as very laid back and easygoing
but truly i overthink everything. and i feel completely justified in doing so
i’m sitting here playing one of the Six merge games i play on a regular basis.
side note: remember i’m basically a shitty stay at home dad. a stay at home dad. i take care of my 7 children. 3 of them are cats, 2 of them are rats, and 2 of them are ferrets. i zip around and make sure we’ve got groceries, i make sure the kids are fed and they go to their appointments and they take their medicine. however i have adhd! and i definitely don’t give my adhd supplement to my roommate and will for probably the next two or three weeks (one of her supplement providers was dropped from her network. the next was HORRIBLE. i talked to her myself. she’s in with a new one who’s getting her medical records bc she is medically complex and has seizures. so she wants her doctors to clear her. and then she’ll have her own) so i dont remember things well. so she reminds me. we go over things for the next week on sundays. recently gotten better at using my calendar. i used to just run on vibes. if it mattered i’d remember. all throughout school i never like, used an agenda. if there were specific problems to do or pages to read i’d just jot down “#2, 3, 6, 9,” “p. 24-46; 52-58,” no context. for medical appointments, if they didn’t send me an appointment reminder, i didn’t go. so she reminds me. and then we do cleaning together. and i cook. she doesn’t feel confident in the kitchen so i’ve been planning out sort of a Course designed to build her confidence. having her cook meals that spotlight what she feels nervous about so that we can work through it. she goes to work a few days per week, and i don’t! for now. i need to i’m broke as shit. it’s just hard being disabled and on disability because i can’t work, and needing to get a job. and SO. I’m home most of the time. I have a lot of medical appointments! I take care of my kids and I drive my roommate places. pick her up from work when she doesn’t want to wait for the ADA bus. I’m passionate about groceries. I don’t have a lot going on
so I’m very invested in phone games. i love merge games because they don’t stress me out.
but I end up sitting there like. trying to optimize my performance. i dont want energy to go to waste. I have to store full energy blocks because if it’s over 100 energy it doesn’t regenerate in its own. So you’re missing out on the regenerated energy that you’d get for FREE if you just wait. it’s like a 2% return.
so i’m playing one of my favorites, travel town. and i’m trying to get cat tree parts from the animal shelter generator. but dog agility course parts are harder to get! so while i’m working on cat tree parts, i’m getting dog agility course parts as a bonus!!! so don’t FUCKING delete them those are not allowed to be deleted you will struggle to generate and merge other items from other generators because those have to stay to make life EASIER EVENTUALLY
and it’s a merge game. so with time, everything refreshes and regenerates. there’s no real skill here. yes, you can do it faster. but. you can’t do it wrong
so if you’ve been following me a while and you’ve thought of as being really relaxed, “what happens happens” type of person. because i know that’s how i come off. you might want to reconsider. two words that could describe me are neurotic and…….determined
#p.txt#DON’T make fun of me for basically doing the ‘unalive’ thing#had to think about that second word#i was only sure of neurotic#i’m stoned.#rocks and all
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harmless (ix)
Summary: Bucky volunteers to go stop a small time villain, but nothing can prepare him for what exactly he has to deal with. (Bucky x villain!reader, drabble series)
Warnings: cursing, sex jokes, frustrated bucky, dramatic reader, anxiety
Word count: 3.9k
A/N: a lot of requests came in last week, so cool and thank you for sending them in!! i’ll try my best to write them if they weren’t originally what i had planned for this series bc they’re so cute kfjdghdf. also hey shoutout to @i-reblog-fics-i-like for suggesting the backstory thing!
here’s my ko-fi if you’d like to support my writing <333
Additional Scene || Previous Part || Series Masterlist
Hot single in your area! 😈 Find your solemate!
Somehow it bypasses Bucky’s spam folder and is in his primary email. SHIELD tech is too advanced to let fake mails like this reach him and this doesn’t make sense. Unless it was one of the stupid dating websites he signed up for.
Leaving aside the obvious typo in the subject, he clicks on it, hoping it doesn’t unleash a virus onto his computer.
He’s instead greeted with a poorly Photoshopped picture of you at a bar with a martini in your hand. He doesn’t have to look too hard to see that the martini is, in fact, an emoji. Off to a terrible start already.
Right beside it is an even worse image, an imitation of an early Internet chat box.
Harbinger of Doom just sent you a message!
Come to the empty lot near lair. Bring goggles. 😩💦
Decline/Accept
He wants to strangle you.
______
“Why did you curse my eyes so early in the morning?” He spots you at the top of the lair, speaking loudly so that it hopefully reached you.
“What?” you yell back down instead. “If you’re saying something, I can’t hear you.”
He rolls his eyes. He pulls his phone from his pocket and presses on your contact.
He watches the look of confusion morph into one of slight surprise when you reach into your pocket and pull out your call.
“Don’t ever send an image like that to me again,” he says directly.
“If that one image is too much for you, how will we ever make our sex tape?”
His mouth opens and shuts like goddamn fish.
He can hear your laughter even without the phone.
“First of all- stop laughing- first of all, a sex tape is never going to happen. Second of all, I have a debriefing to go to, we need to make this quick.”
He holds up a finger when he sees you begin to say something. By the look of trouble painted all over your face, he knows it’s going to be a dumb innuendo.
“Thirdly, why are you standing there?”
“I watched The Last Airbender,” you say once your cackling dies down.
“I like that show.” He did. Peter sometimes watched it when he came over and Bucky more often than not joined in.
“I know, you told me.”
Oh.
“Okay, what now?”
“Put your goggles on.” You take one step towards the ledge.
“What are you doing?” The goggles don’t do anything to shield him from the sun, considering that they’re not tinted. Maybe he could invest in those.
You send him a smile, taking a step further. His walk towards the building turns into a jog, then a sprint when you’re basically standing on the edge.
You spread your arms out like Jesus Christ himself before flinging yourself off the building. His stomach drops.
His phone falls to the ground, discarded to the side as he sprints to break your landing.
It never comes.
Instead, a gust of wind smacks him in the face, forcing him a few steps backwards.
“I am now an air bender.” your eyes shone. “Kind of.”
Just like that, the show was ruined.
He wipes the dust on from his glasses that he now understands why you made him wear. Considerate, for a person who nearly just gave him a heart attack.
“Why.” It’s not even a question, just a statement.
“You know how the Tower has a giant ‘A’ on the side?”
He stares at you.
“I‘m gonna spray paint ‘asshole’ on the side of it.”
Pepper would not like that.
“That’s not even evil.”
“Yeah, but it’d annoy your super friends,” You do a flip midair, testing out the repulsors that were tied around your palms, “and I’m the voice of the people.”
You’re too high for him to reach. He doesn’t have his tools, or anything useful on him considering that he never had to use them before. He couldn’t even launch himself at you from the side of the building because you’d just move out of the way. He could jump really high but it would just have the same consequence.
He could talk and keep you distracted but that worked once, it wouldn’t again. At least not for long.
Fuck, he really had only one option.
He leaves you to do your somersaults and turns, walking over to where he dropped his phone. It’s an upgrade from the brick he was using a while ago, but not a high end Stark model. A smartphone, but barely.
He sighs, punching in the number and holding it up to his ear.
“Who are you calling?” you yell from above him.
“Go back to your shitty aerobics,” he yells back.
You pause for a second. “Was that a fucking pun, James Bar-”
The dial tone ends when someone picks up. He diverts his attention back to the call.
“Hey man, I-
“No.”
“You didn’t even let me finish.”
“It’s probably something stupid,” Sam doesn’t even sound annoyed, just uninterested.
“I need your wings.”
“I was right. Bye.”
It was a long shot anyway.
“Fuckin’ hold on a second.” He sees you disintegrate a concrete block by having it drop from the air. “You come here and fix this, then. She’s air bending now.”
“...like Avatar?” Sam unsurprisingly got the reference.
Peter’s interests were usually shared by everyone in the Tower, just because they had to compensate for the teasing he had to endure. It led to a lot of geeky documentaries and occasional musicals. Bucky wouldn’t be caught dead humming songs from Thoroughly Modern Millie under his breath.
“Yeah.”
“You want me to come and fight your girlfriend,” he says slowly.
“She’s not my girlfriend,” Bucky urges, “and yes, I need help. Can’t exactly reach her when she’s twenty feet above me.”
“We have a briefing in 30 minutes. Why did you even go there today?”
He doesn’t know how to answer that. Just looks up at you smacking one of the repulsors against your thigh when it sputters for a second. It’s tradition.
“Well?” Bucky ignores his question.
“Fine,” Sam’s voice is distant for a second as he agrees. “Clint’s asking if he can come too.”
“Fuck no.” One of them was more than enough and Sam was way better at negotiation.
He hears a faint profanity from who he assumed was Clint before the call cuts.
He takes a seat on the ground and waits.
“You’re not going to make any effort to stop me?” You have your arms pressed to your side, palms pointed downwards to keep you afloat.
“I could just throw things at you again.” He makes a mention towards the small pebbles.
“I will fuck you up if you even try,” you warn. He lifts his arms in surrender. “So that’s it. You’re just going to sit there.”
“To be honest, I couldn’t care less if you painted the building,” he says with the least amount of interest he could muster, not that that was very hard.
“Do you not like your team?”
“I do.” He isn’t lying. “But they’re little shits.”
“I can draw a couple of dicks on their window, no problem,” you say offhandedly.
He looks up at you through his fingers. “That won’t be required.”
Although it was appreciated.
“Cool, so then I’m gonna go.” You make a mention of the utility belt on your waist. He looks at the many spray cans that decorate it.
“What colour are you going with?” he interrupts quickly. Fuckin’ Sam. What was the point of wings if he couldn’t get here in 2 minutes?
“Red, probably.” You look down. “I got purple and white just in case.”
“Building’s dark, red is good.”
“You really don’t care, do you?” You lower yourself down to the ground, a few feet ahead of him. “What’s going on?”
“Nothing.” For fucks’ sake, Sam. “You really don’t like superheroes, do you?”
“I don’t have anything against them.”
“Then why do you do this every week?”
This was wading into personal territory and he did not like it.
“Well.” Your eyebrows knit together. “Because I want to. It’s fun.”
“No other reason?”
“Do I need to have another reason?” You push your palm downwards, sending you back up into the air. “Can’t I just be evil because I want to?”
“Sure,” he says. He’s heard worse reasons. “Why not?”
“Besides, if you think I don’t like superheroes then you should meet Jake.”
“Who’s Jake?” He hadn’t ever heard you mention him before because he’d remember if you had.
“My roommate.”
“I didn’t see him when I came over.”
“That’s because we’re not conjoined at the hip.” It takes you a second to stabilise. “Besides, he grabbed the water while I got the bracelet but he refused to come say hi.”
Bucky looked down at his wrist. It was still there. He found himself fidgeting with it more often than not.
“He hates superheroes?”
“He has a valid reason.” Your eyes widen in worry when your head suddenly dips.
“What is it?” He knows the height at which you’re at isn’t very dangerous but if need be, he’s close by.
“Come find out.” Your eyes shone mischievously. “But yeah, no reason for me to be evil.”
“Not even a tragic backstory?”
“None. But if you want it, I can give you one, Barnes.” You test the waters, seeing how long you can lie horizontally. “Can’t promise you’ll like it though.”
“Try me.” He has time to kill. He’s a good listener.
“Well, it all started with my family- a troop of gorillas.” You flip over to lie on your back. “They practically raised me, they did. Until my gorilla mother died and I was all but consumed by grief and-”
“Your mother was a gorilla?” He entertains the notion.
“Or was it my father?” you ask thoughtfully. “I don’t know, I don’t remember. Anyway, I met a-”
“Just to clarify, none of this is real, right?” he interjects.
You stare at him. He stares at you.
“Bucky, that’s the plot of Tarzan,” you say slowly, “or at least whatever I remember of it... which I’m beginning to realise isn’t much.”
“Just clarifying.” He leans back again.
“Anyway so then when my mother, the deer-”
“Gorilla.”
“Whatever. Was killed, I escaped to some place-”
“Where?”
“Somewhere. And I stayed with these seven men-”
“Why seven?” He actually remembers watching this movie with his sister when it came out. An early memory, a bit faded. He remembers how long he saved up for the ticket.
“Because character development. And then I realised the reason my life was so weird was because there was a rat controlling me by pulling on my hair-”
“What the fuc-”
“If you ask any more questions, I’m going to stop.”
Bucky blinks at you. “So that’s your backstory.”
“Raw and uncut, baby.”
“Just to get this straight, your mother, the gorilla deer-”
“Witch.”
“Huh?”
“She was a witch who stole my hair.”
“Wha-”
He’s interrupted by the giant shadow cast by something that flies overhead.
Fucking finally.
He doesn’t even have to look up. Sam does a small glide to the ground, landing gracefully beside him.
Bucky finds you speechless but straightened up from your earlier posture.
“Buck,” Sam greets him.
“Sam,” he says in return, getting up from his place.
A grin spreads across your face. “Mr. Sam Wilson. No way.”
“You’re Y/N, I’m assuming?” Sam offers, posture relaxed. He clearly wasn’t here to fight.
“The one and only.” You tear your eyes away from Sam to glare at Bucky. “Barnes, if you had told me we were expecting guests, I would have dressed better.”
Bucky furrows his eyebrows in suspicion at you. You’d dress up for Sam.
You dressed up like a suburban tourist dad for him. He was feeling the offence incoming.
“Can’t count on him to be useful in any situation.” Alright, he did not call Sam just to have the both of you team up against him.
“Normally I’d agree with you but he did just invite you here, so...” you trail off, looking at Sam expectantly.
What the shit.
Sam smirks. Bucky switches rapidly back and forth between the both of you.
“I see why Buck keeps coming back every week.” It doesn’t take long for him to catch on, enlisting a feeling of triumph from you.
“I can’t see why he doesn’t just stay at home everyday if this is the view.” You gesture to him.
This is not what Bucky wanted.
“Okay,” Bucky interrupts, “what is going on here?”
“Pure chemistry, I’d say.” You’re half tempted to bite your lip to seal the deal.
“I agree.” Sam just nods, completely and utterly serious.
You think that you’ll give him a gift basket just for playing along despite meeting you for the first time at that moment.
“Get a room.” Bucky rolls his eyes.
“Maybe we will.” You tap your finger against your lip in thought. “How do you feel about Indian food, Sam?”
“Very positively.”
Bucky grits his teeth. “If you’re not planning to spray paint the Tower, can you just hand over the repulsers so we can go home for the day?”
You let out a small tsk in disapproval. “See what I have to deal with?”
“Can’t imagine how you do it every weekend,” Sam says dryly, not wasting a second in replying.
“Hello?” Bucky waves his arm around. “She’s the villain here.”
“Your face is the villain here.” You tear your eyes away from Sam only to glare at him. “He won’t even wear a cape. Why am I the only one who brings their A-Game every week?”
“Sam just get the damn-”
“You should wear a cape, man.” Bucky’s absolutely sure that even Sam knows it’s a ridiculous idea.
“I’m not wearing a fuckin’ cape,” he grumbles.
“What are your thoughts on swords, then?” Your finger finds a place under your chin in deep contemplation. “You’d look great with a sword.”
Bucky buries his face in his palms. “Sam, for the love of God.”
“Okay, alright.” Sam finally gives in with a small chuckle. He runs a few steps to get a small head start before launching himself into the air, whizzing past your levitating figure. He does a neat little flip midair before matching your height.
Showoff.
“How difficult are you gonna make this, Wilson?” you ask, a smirk on your face.
“Jesus Christ.” Bucky exhales, looking at the both of you through his goggles.
“What’s your play here?” Sam calls out loudly.
“Was gonna spray paint ‘asshole’ on the side of the Tower.”
“After the ‘A’?”
“After the ‘A’,” you confirm.
“Now that’s too small,” Sam tutted. “You gotta think bigger. Paint the whole Tower.”
“Sam!” Bucky looks horrified.
“Hmm.” You look like you’re considering it. “Don’t have enough paint for that though.”
“You’re an evil genius, right?” Sam casts a small glance at Bucky. “At least that’s what he tells me.”
“You talk about me?” You grin at the disgruntled man on the ground.
“I don’t,” he mutters, shaking his head. A lie.
“Yeah, so build something,” Sam points out. “Get some more paint. I’ll even tell you the best vantage points to spill it.”
“No, he won’t,” Bucky shouts from below.
“He’s just cranky because he didn’t get his prune juice this morning, ignore him,” Sam dismisses him.
Prune juice? He was a young 100, not ancient.
“What’s your favourite colour, Falcon?”
“I like red.”
As annoyed as Bucky is right now, he stores that away in his memory for later. He also knows Sam loves seafood and a good pair of shoes.
“A couple of gallons of red paint it is, then.” You lower yourself to the ground, Sam slowly follows suit until he lands beside Bucky.
“You know we can’t let you go without taking those, right?” Bucky tilts his head towards your invention.
You narrow your eyes at him. He doesn’t budge.
“I’ll tell ya what,” Sam pipes in instead. “I’ll keep them until you finish getting the paint and once you’re done, we’ll make an evening out of vandalising the Tower.”
Bucky may not enjoy his company all that much but he admires Sam’s diplomacy. Of course, you would never make it this easy while reasoning with him.
“That a promise, Mr. Wilson?” You raise your eyebrow at him questioningly but are already in the process of removing the things from your hand.
“Wouldn’t ever lie to you, doll.” He holds up his hand in a mock swear.
You walk towards Bucky and him, rotating your wrists to get rid of the soreness. “Bold claim for a man who met me ten minutes ago.”
“Feels like it’s been longer.” He sends you a wink and you can’t stop the laugh the escapes from you finally.
Bucky holds his hand out for the gadgets. You shrink away from him with a click of your tongue.
“Technically, he takes this round.” You send a nod towards Sam, dropping off the repulsors into his hand. “So he gets it.”
Bucky rolls his eyes.
“You gonna keep ‘em safe?” you ask Sam, this time a little more earnestly.
“Guard it with my life,” he says seriously, pressing his lips together in a line to avoid smiling.
“You’re both ridiculous,” Bucky cuts in.
“You’re going to be late.” Sam tucks the devices into his pocket safely. “You know how Steve gets when people walk in on his speeches. Do you even have a ride?”
“Got the motorcycle.”
“See you there.” Sam nods.
“Save me a place,” Bucky says to him.
“No.” He doesn’t even hesitate. “Y/N. It was a pleasure.”
“Still holding you to that evening, Sam.” You send him a smile.
“I’m countin’ on it.” He gives you a small three finger salute before taking off, leaving you staring after his retracting figure.
When the dust settles, Bucky awkwardly clears his throat. “Right. So that was that.”
“Dude,” you let out an exhale. “he’s so hot.”
He murmurs something unintelligible. It vaguely sounds like a series of threats but mostly a list of complaints.
“Don’t you have a meeting to get to?” You turn your attention back to him.
“Yeah.”
“Aren’t you going to be late?” You glance at the clock on your phone.
“I’ll just tell them I was on a mission.” Well, sort of. “Besides, what are they gonna do? Kick me out?”
“Fair enough.” You shrug. “Have a safe ride back.”
From what he knows of you and Sam, the both of you were kidding around. But he could never be too sure. He can’t even ask if you were serious about the entire thing because it’s none of his business.
Were the implications of having his mortal nemesis and other mortal nemesis date important enough to overrule that?
“Are you planning to skip your meeting, or?” you ask when he remains freezes in his spot, eyes glazed over like he’s thinking about something. “Because if you are, I know this great Thai place-”
“Don’t do that again,” he says instead, shaking his head to jolt him out of his thoughts.
“What?”
“Flinging yourself off roofs like that.”
“Why?” Because it scared the hell out of him, for one.
“Just don’t.”
“Oh please, like you’ve never done dangerous shit like that before.” You narrow your eyes at him, reading his face. “Are you telling me you care about me?”
“No.” His nose twitches. “Just don’t throw yourself off buildings when I’m around.”
“What about when you’re not?”
“As long as I’m not there to witness it.” He shrugs, spinning on his heel to leave. Technically he preferred if you didn’t do things like that at all.
“Fine. I’ll just have my clone try out all the dangerous stuff for me.”
He stops in his tracks. “You have a clone?”
“Well,” You squint, “no. But I’m working on it.”
He scoffs, shaking his head. “Bye Y/N.”
“You know, it sounds an awful lot like you’re saying we’re friends.” Your whole demeanour changes and he already knows what’s coming.
“I never said that,” he argues vehemently. “All I said was that I can’t have your murder on my hands.”
“Thus implying that we’re friends. In a fucked up, enemies kind of way.” You positively beam at him. “Aw, Barnes, that’s adorable.”
Adorable? Adorable?
“I hate you.”
“I love you, too, bestie,” you gush, dumb grin on your face. “I’ll make us friendship rings next time. What are your thoughts on matching tattoos?”
He wants to cry.
______
By the time Sam walks into the meeting room, the session’s already begun. He shoots an apologetic look to a monologuing Steve before taking his place at the nearest chair available.
Something sharp pokes his thigh. His wings are off and in the backpack beside him, but then he remembers your little inventions that were still in his pocket.
He tries not to make much of a noise while he pulls them out, giving them a look over to make sure they’re not broken.
“Watcha got there, Big Bird?” Tony asks lowly from beside him.
“Something that Barnes’ enemy made.” Sam holds it up slightly.
“The one he’s been rendezvousing around town with every weekend?”
“That’s her.” He’s about to put it in his backpack when Tony stops him.
“Pass that here for a second.” He recognises it immediately for what it is, interest piqued.
Sam hands one of them over while he puts the other back in the bag. It’s a metallic circle, not bigger than Tony’s palm, with a thick leather strap to tie it around your palm.
“She made this?”
“Why don’t you ask him?” Sam mentions towards Bucky who silently slips into the conference room, standing in the corner near the potted plant since there were no more chairs left.
“The balance has gotta be off on this thing,” he mutters to himself, wholly ignoring the brooding man standing in the corner like a Christmas tree.
“She seemed to be manoeuvring it fine,” Sam catches the eye of a lower ranking agent who makes the mistake of glaring at him for talking while the meeting was going on. A few seconds later the agent hastily looks away and doesn’t turn around for the rest of the hour.
“Could be better.” He uses a much more intricate model for his suits, although this isn’t even half-bad for a homemade version. “Do you know how long she took to make this?”
“Buck says she comes up with a new one every week, so I’m guessing that long.”
It had a few glitches but it was incredibly refined for a week’s worth of work.
“Interesting.” He gives it a quick overlook before handing it back to Sam who drops it into the bag.
He casts a swift glance at Bucky, noting how he wasn’t even paying attention to the meeting but rather to whatever he had tied around his metal wrist, fidgeting with it with his thumb.
Tony has an idea.
And that was generally bad news.
Next part
#bucky x reader#bucky barnes x reader#mcu fic#bucky fic#bucky barnes fic#bucky fluff#bucky barnes fluff#bucky angst#bucky barnes angst#harmless fic#winter soldier x reader#Winter Soldier#bucky barnes#bucky
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He’s Lost - Bakugou Katsuki - Part 1
Bakugou x f!reader
Warnings - Angst, Physical Harm, Cursing, accused Cheating, Katsuki’s insecurities
BAKUGOU’S MASTERLIST
A/N: This is my first writing piece but this has been stuck in my mind since v-day is coming up so I had to get it out. Plz enjoy!!
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4
Summary: Y/N is so busy around Valentine’s, her lack of attention towards her Pomeranian is causing him to freak out and do the worst of the worst
Love is in the air! The birds are singing, The breeze is blowing, the setting sun is shining, and the explosive teen is.....well, bruting.
Can you blame him though? Y/N’s been a little distant ever since February started. Even right now, instead of enjoying their time together in a quiet park, she’s staring down at her phone doing who knows what.
Why? Was he not good enough? Has she gotten tired of him? They’ve only been together for a little over a year. Is she talking to someon- no. Katsuki stopped himself from thinking like that. There’s no way his precious teddy bear would ever do that. Not only that, he was the best there is. Why would she even try to go?
“You dumbass. You’re missing this.” Bakugou sighed. “Huh? What? Missing what?” Y/N looked around looking for whatever “this” was until Bakugou grabbed her chin to force her to look him in the eyes. “THIS DUMBASS! US! You’re so focused on that dumb phone. Jeez, can’t a guy just get his girl’s attention.” Bakugou said dramatically.
It wasn’t that Y/N wasn’t giving him attention, it’s that it wasn’t the same. Yea she right there snuggled into his arm. And yea she was petting his hair just the way he liked. And YES, she was peppering his face with kisses from time to time. But it all felt off? Like only half her energy was put into the love and affection.
“Suki, aren’t u being a little dramatic. I’m right here with you baby. I’m sorry if I’ve been a little distracted. Come here dummy.” And as Y/N pulls Bakugou in for a tighter hug all he can do is release a “hmph” while falling into it...until her phone went (ding!) once again. And she went to check it. Once again.
Bakugou was getting tired so he got up and suggested they’d head back to UA. Y/N only got up and began to walk beside him, hand in hand, while still checking her phone time to time. And Bakugou was getting sick of it
*Wtf is she doing on that piece of junk? What could be so important she would half ass our entire evening together? .....Could she possibly be talking to someone else?............no.* Bakugou let those negative thoughts die down as they continued their journey back.
——————————————————————————
A few days later
“COME ON!!” Bakugou screamed as he realeased a blast towards Kirishima. When Bakugou invited him to train, The red head initially thought it was to ...you know..TRAIN. But after some time, the blonde’s best friend began to see the bigger picture.
“Dude. What’s up with you man? We always go full on during training, but it’s not even like you’re trying to hit me. It feels like you’re just taking your anger out on me.” Kirishima said.
“Congrats on noticing shitty hair, I’m glad somebody’s noticing my damn mood.” Weirded out by his friend’s unusual openness, the red head continued to ask.
“So what’s up?”
“Nothing.”
“But you just-“
“NOPE!”
Bakugou exclaimed as he began to gather his stuff to leave the training area. “BAKUGOU!” Kiri shouted. “WHAT!” “.......it’s Y/N isn’t it?”
Upon hearing that, the blonde turned to look at his best friend with this sad puppy dog look. And man, if Katsuki had doggy ears, everyone would see how low they’d go. His best friend didn’t need to see it though, he could tell those ears would be 6 ft under if they were actually there bc there’s nothing hiding Katsuki’s vulnerability when it comes to Y/N. As the two best friends go to sit on the bleachers, Bakugou takes a deep breath before saying his thoughts.
“I think Y/N is cheating on me.”
“................HUH???!!!!”
Kirishima went from “caring and considerate” to “WHATDIDHESAYYY” in seconds. Y/N L/N?? Cheating?? Ok. Y/N was one fiesty girl, and she definitely had sass, power, attitude, and a little mischief, but she also had kindness, compassion, consideration, and honesty flowing though her. Not to mention extreme loyalty. There’s no way.
“Look man, with all due respect, I think you’ve finally lost it.” The red head laughed. “I’m being serious shitty hair.” The blonde stated. “She’s been so distracted lately. She’s always with me but it’s like her mind is also somewhere else. And not to mention that damn phone she’s always on now. She can’t go 30 minutes without checking it at least twice. And not only that, when she does leave to do whatever, she’s gone for hours at a time! What’s a guy supposed to think with all of that?! I mean it’d make sense if she wanted to leave. I get it, I can get loud, and yell, and I get angry a lot but.. she knows I never mean it, right? I call her a dumbass like i do everyone else...ugh but she isn’t just everyone else, she’s my girlfriend and she’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me.....SO WHY TF IS SHE CHEATIN-“ before the blonde could continue, his best friend cut him off.
“BAKUGOU” “WHAT??!!” “....talk to her.” Kirishima said. “What?” Bakugou asked. Kirishima continued. “Cheating is a real sensitive topic in a relationship. I don’t wanna give my opinion on something that could ruin something amazing. C’mon man, we both know Y/N isn’t like that but who am I to tell you what to do. I wanna help, I do, but I think it’s best if you go to her with all this. Honestly though, if you asked me, Y/N would be the last person I’d ever think of when it came to cheating on ANYTHING. Especially the guy she cares so much about.” And with that last sentence, Kirishima stood up from his spot and pat Bakugou on his shoulder before exiting.
With Bakugou left with nothing but his thoughts and Kirishima’s advice, he left and headed straight towards your room.
——————————————————————————
“Shut up!” You excitingly screamed though the phone. “You really found the last part?”
“Yup, it only took about 6 different stores across the entire city.” Shinsou sarcastically replied. “You owe me.”
“Yeah, yeah, I know and I appreciate it. Katsuki’s gonna love his gift!” You said.
With Valentine’s Day around the corner, you’ve been preparing only the best Valentine’s Day surprise for the best boyfriend in the world. You’ve been so busy planning your surprise that I guess you could say you haven’t been giving Katsuki the massive amount of attention he’s used to from you, but you can definitely say it’ll all be worth it when he sees one of his presents that you’ve been working on. A silencer for his gauntlet blasts that not only decreases the volume of his attacks, but also increases his attack power. You remember how Bakugou had vented about his attacks being too loud that they scare people, but when he tried to keep them quiet, the attack isn’t as powerful so saving can be quite difficult. He only spoke about it once, but you could see the look on his face whenever he was out using his quirk around civilians. So why not give him a device that’ll help with his loud little problem. Now were you a support class student who knew how to make support items? Hell no. But were you a loving girlfriend willing to give her man the best Valentine’s Day ever? Hell yeah.
The piece of gear would’ve been easier to make IF it weren’t for a pesky piece of the project getting destroyed by Shinsou after he made Denki electrocute himself while he was right next to your prototype on the table. So to make it up to you, Shinsou went all around town looking for the piece you needed to complete your support item for Katsuki. Finally, all pieces had come together.
“He better. That damn bastard doesn’t know how amazing his girlfriend is. Instead of ignoring his ass these past few weeks, you sent ME to get all this shit for you so you could keep your precious Pomeranian happy.” Shinsou said while rolling his baggy eyes.
As Bakugou approached the outside of your dorm room’s door, he heard your voice.
“You know, you’re so right. That Pomeranian is unaware of just exactly how amazing I am. I really could’ve left whenever but I stuck around.” You snorted. “Well I’m glad I had you with me through it all Shinsou.”
*Pomeranian? SHINSOU?!? Through IT ALL?!?!? YOU WERE WITH THAT PURPLE HAIRED, SLEEP DEPRIVED ASS MIND CONTROLLING FREAK?!?? AND YOU WERE WITH HIM THE ENTIRE TIME YOU’VE BEEN DATING BAKUGOU?!?*
Oh to say Katsuki was pissed was an understatement. He felt all these emotions hitting him all at once. Anger, Disgust, Pain, Betrayal. It all became too much for him before Katsuki ran away from your down with his bed down and silent tears hitting the floor. When he let himself fall to the floor in the privacy of his room he screamed into his hands. His first love, his first real relationship, his teddy bear betraying his love, loyalty, and trust for over an entire year. After hours of crying, Katsuki was able to pull himself into bed. He couldn’t even bring himself to shower even though he spent all that time in the gym with Kirishima. He just wanted to sleep to escape reality. As he looked at his phone, he saw 1 missed call from Y/N, and 1 text saying “Goodnight love💗💥!” Bakugou scoffed at the text. Figuring u must be texting Shinsou the same thing. As Bakugou placed his phone down, an evil thought came to mind. Ruin her.
Bakugou smirked to himself as he had this pyscho and sinister look on his face. He would ruin Y/N. They haven’t officially broken up yet, so he could hurt her just as she hurt him. And Bakugou wasn’t stupid or so he thought he’s aware Valentine’s is coming up, so why not break little Y/N L/N’s heart on a day dedicated to nothing but love and happiness. It’ll be the perfect revenge on a little satin like her. Bakugou finally turned on his side with an evil, satisfied smile, and fat tears in his eyes once more.
——————————————————————————
The next morning, Katsuki got up with a broken heart, but he figured if he wanted his plan to work, he had to fake this smile. Getting up, getting ready, and getting dressed was business as usual, but meeting up with Y/N in the morning was now off the schedule. Instead of going into her room to check on her like he usually does, he just went straight to breakfast and straight to class without speaking to anyone.
With Class 1-A seated and Mr.Aizawa at the head of the classroom, the students can finally start their first lesson of the day. Until, the door slid wide open. There stood an exhausted and quite frankly dishelved Y/N. “My apologies sensei. I was up late last night and overslept. Please forgive me.” Y/N said as she bowed her head in sorry. “Just take your seat L/N.” The tired eye teacher said.
As Y/N walked to her desk, she noticed Bakugou wouldn’t even glance her way. She was a little thrown off since it would be normal for him to at least give her a judgemental look for sleeping in, but no. Nothing.
Bakugou on the other hand was writhing in agony. Oh how he wanted to check on Y/N and make sure everything was fine, but that voice in the back of his head couldn’t help but tell him to ignore her since she’s a cheater. She may have been the girl he’s loved dearest, but she was also the one causing his heart to shatter.
After a few classes, Y/N tried to approach Bakugou several times, but each time he brushed her off. And when the bell finally rang for lunch, you can bet Katsuki was the first one out the door. Y/N followed him of course, in worry and concern.
“Babe! Baby! Katsuuu!!! KATSUKII!” Y/N whined for her boyfriend to at least look at her but once again. Nothing. Bakugou wanted to hug her and hold her tight but he couldn’t. Not after what she’s done. Right before Bakugou entered the cafeteria, Y/N pulled him aside and held onto his wrists.
“Baby? Hey, what’s up with you? I’ve been calling your name and trying to talk to you but you keep brushing me off. You also didn’t stop by this morning. Is something wrong, love?” Y/N was hoping for something. ANYTHING at this point. And it was like the gods heard her prayer because she definitely got....something. “My bad.” The blonde haired boy dryly replied. “....Oh, um, ok suki.” The poor girl just thought her dear boyfriend was having a bad day, so she just left it alone and let him go. But still, even on his worse days he would at least visit her in the mornings. As they sat down with the bakusquad, the entire table noticed how Bakugou sat up and moved across from Y/N after she chose to sit next to him like usual. The tension was so thick you could cut it with a knife, and Kirishima could already feel what had gone down. He at least knew his bro didn’t talk to his girl. Not manly at all.
——————————————————————————
Valentine’s Day
During lunch, Kirishima has finally decided to speak to Bakugou about this whole thing. He hasn’t been getting any updates since their time in the gym, so when it was just him and his best friend having lunch together, he went for it.
“Man what the hell is going on with you and Y/N? I’ve noticed you’ve been avoiding her like crazy,” Kirishima said while stuffing his face, nervous about the answer. “I was right all along.” The blonde sadly spoke. “She’s been cheating on me since the start of our entire relationship. And with that baggy eyed freak from 1-B.”
Kirishima couldnt believe what he was hearing. He almost choked on his food. Y/N was actually cheating. I guess people don’t know people as well as he thought. “.....wow...I’m sorry man.” The red haired friend said. He was at a lost for words and didn’t know what else to say. *sigh* “don’t be. It all goes down tonight.” Bakugou said with a sad smile. “What do you mean?” His friend asked. The blonde looked at him right in his red eyes. “I’m breaking her heart tonight, on the one day of the year dedicated to love.”
Meanwhile
Instead of going to lunch, Y/N spent her time finishing up Katsuki’s surprise in his room. Yeah, he’s been having a bad past few days so why not bring him a smile with these amazing gifts on the day of love. Although Y/N didn’t really feel the love today (due to Katsuki again being so distant and ignoring her “good morning blasty💥💗!” And “Happy Valentine’s Day my love♥️!” Texts) she was determined to make sure Katsuki knew just exactly how much she loved him. She was almost done setting up in his room. Rose petals on the bed, Candles everywhere, 4 different gifts including his new support item made by you, his favorite meal is going to be set here on his table, and you and him together spending every loving second with each other. Y/N didn’t realize that because of her setup, she missed the entire rest of the day. “Meh, so worth it when I see the look on Suki’s face.” Tonight is going to be perfect.....or so you thought.
You didn’t expect to find Katsuki in your room, sitting on the edge of you bed waiting for you with his head hanging low and his shoulders slumped.
*maybe he has a surprise for me....? Yea that has to be it!* Y/N happily thought as she closed the door.
“Suki!! Happy Valentine’s Day!” Y/N said with all the love in her heart as she ran and jumped on the boy for a hug. But Bakugou didn’t say anything. He didn’t move. He just glanced back up at her, giving her this cold stare. Y/N was too busy professing her undying love for her boyfriend to even notice his scary silence. “Suki I’m really glad it’s you who I have in my life,” the love sicken girl bashfully spoke while looking at the ground. “You make me so happy and I feel so blessed being able to spend my life with you in it. I really hope you know just how much I care and lov-“ Bakugou couldn’t listen to this bullshit anymore. He pushed Y/N off of him just before she could say those 3 words that would get him to break.
“Hey! Suki? Why would you do that?!” Y/N exclaimed while standing back up. “I hate you.” The blonde spoke coldly. As those words left his mouth, Y/N heart and world were falling apart. Her eyes went wide open and her jaw slightly dropped. As she was about to say something else, Katsuki cut her off with “I’m breaking up with your dumbass. Right here. Right now!” Bakugou yelled. Y/N was in shock. She felt hurt, pain, she was just feeling so broken.
As tears filled her eyes, she asked “w-why?” as she tried to reach out to him. “Why? WHY?!” Bakugou screamed as he stood up above her slapping her hand away. “THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN WHY, Y/N. YOU’RE A FUCKING CHEATER, THATS WHY!” The blonde yelled in her face. Y/N couldn’t believe it. He thought she was cheating? Why would she even do that? She already has the best person in the world for her so why? “DONT EVEN GIVE ME THAT “it didn’t mean anything, Suki!” BULLSHIT. I DONT GIVE A FUCK, CUZ YOU’VE BEEN CHEATING ON ME AND PLAYING ME FOR A DAMN FOOL THIS ENTIRE FUCKING TIME!” Bakugou went on as his voice began to crack while tears flowed down his porcelain face. “YOU LIED TO ME. I GAVE YOU MY ENTIRE BEING AND YOU FUCKING LIED. YOU DUMB FUCKING BITCH, I CANT BELIEVE I EVER LOVED A SORRY EXCUSE OF A PERSON LIKE YOU. I HATE YOU SO DAMN MUCH, I DONT EVEN UNDERSTAND WHAT THE FUCK I SAW IN YOU!” Y/N’s heart hit the ground. No actually, it went 6 ft under because after all that he’s said, her heart is dead. Broken. In agony. “Suki I-“ “DONT FUCKING CALL ME THAT L/N.” Hearing him refer to her with her family name hit so hard. “KATSUKI PLEASE! I DIDNT DO ANYTHING I SWEA-“ as Y/N tried to reach out to him, he interrupted her again and pushed her hand away. “I SAID DONT CALL ME THAT!”
The blonde yelled, except this time....he didn’t only yell. The burning scent of smoke came into his nose and the loud explosion could be heard throughout the building. The product of what he just did came to him. He just attacked the love of his life. As much as Y/N hurt him, Katsuki still loved her with his everything. And the fact that he subconsciously attacked her broke him even more. Y/N’s screams of pain reached his ears, as he looked down and saw his precious teddy bear with a burned arm and fat tears on her face, crying in pain.
Bakugou ran down to her level to try and help her. “Y/N! Hey, hey teddy bear look I’m so-“ Y/N pushed him away before he could continue. “WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU BAKUGOU?!” Ouch. His family name felt like poison coming from your tongue. “Princess, I’m sorry I didn’t-“ “SHUT UP AND LET ME SPEAK FOR ONCE YOU FUCKING IDIOT!” Y/N screamed as she stood up to face him. “I DIDNT FUCKING CHEAT ON YOU. WHY THE HELL WOULD I DO THAT WHEN YOU’RE THE BEST DAMN THING THATS EVER HAPPENED TO ME?!..ah!” Y/N was cut off by the stinging of her wound, and Bakugou couldn’t do anything but stare. Y/N grabbed onto her wound before continuing. “I love you Bakugou. I wouldn’t even dream about doing wrong by you. I thought I was a good girlfriend or at least a good person-“ Bakugou quickly interrupted “No! Y/N you are, I just-“ “If I am then what the hell made you even think of me so lowly? What the hell did I do to make you question my loyalty? What the hell did I do that was worthy of you burning my fucking arm?!” Y/N cried out.
Silence fell upon the room. It felt like hours before anybody said anything. Both people had heavy tears in their face now. One crying because he realized he was an idiot and harmed the girl who did nothing wrong, and One crying because she did nothing wrong but ended up being a villain in her loved one’s life. Y/N broke the silence with a scoff.
“You know what Suki?” Y/N said looking him in the eyes. “Yes teddy bear?” Bakugou quickly replied with wide, desperate eyes upon hearing the loving nickname, thinking they would move on from this horrible incident. “Get the fuck out.” Y/N said in a low voice. Bakugou was shocked. He knew he fucked up horribly but after realizing the truth, he can’t leave you! He loves you too damn much for that! “What? Y/N please listen to me, I’m sor-“ “I DONT GIVE A FUCK! Leave..please.” The sad girl cried. Bakugou grabbed onto her shoulders begging her to not end this. “Y/N please! Please princess! I’m so fucking sorry! I’m an idiot, I know, and I definitely don’t deserve you but please I can’t lose you.” Bakugou said with tears falling down his face. “Please don’t do this to us. Please don’t do this to me, I’m BEGGING YOU.” “Bakugou-“ The sad boy cut you off, shaking his head, “ NO ITS SUKI. YOUR SUKI. YOUR KATSUKI.......please teddy bear I need you.......h-here let me help yo-”
You harshly pushed the boy off of you and as he tried to desperately go back to you, you used your quirk to keep him at bay. “Bakugou Katsuki. I’m leaving this room since you won’t, and I won’t come back until I know you’re out of my room.” Y/N began as she looked at him with cold, sad eyes. “From now on, you won’t have to worry about this bitch because I’ll stay out of your life, I swear. Don’t look at me, don’t touch me, DONT EVEN TALK TO ME. Just leave me alone....we’re done.” And with that Y/N ran out of her room, and out of the building, needing to get away from the place for a little bit. She could deal with her wound later. She just needed to get away. Bakugou just stood there in sadness and shock. As much as he wanted to run after you, he figured he’d give you a little breather. You guys could fix things in the morning...right?
Bakugou waited an hour in your room waiting for you, but you were right. You really weren’t coming back until he left your private area. So that’s what he did. With a heavy heart, he picked himself up and dragged his feet back to his dorm. He looked like a mess. He knew he did. Messy hair, red swollen eyes, dry lips. His entire body screamed heartbroken. When he open the door, instant regret and love hit him at once. His room was covered with rose petals and flowers, there were candles everywhere, heart shaped balloons all around, he had 4 different boxes of gifts, and two plates of extra spicy curry was set on his table, obviously cold now. What caught his eye was that one of the gift boxes had a note attached to it. With tears in his eyes, he read it.
Hey Suki! It’s Valentine’s Day! I love you to the moon and back and so much more. There’s no words that are able to describe the way I feel about you. You drive me insane in all the right ways and I love it! Lol. I hope you like your Valentine’s Day surprise. I’ve been working for weeks on it, so I’m sorry if I’ve been a little distracted. I know I’ve been kinda absent these past few days but I promise I’ll make it up to you love! Hopefully I can start with this gift that I’ve been working on. Enjoy your brand new grenade silencer! Made it myself just for you. There’s nothing else in the world like this. I love you Bakugou Katsuki!
(P.S. If Shinsou from 1-B gives you shit about it, it’s because I made him drag his ass everywhere to look for a missing part so I wouldn’t have to leave you so much)
XOXO, Your forever teddy bear <3
As he quickly opened the gift, he saw it. A silencer that would attach to his gauntlets to make the sound quieter and the blast even more powerful. It was incredible. You are incredible. He only ever mentioned the sound of his blasts once, and you listened and you fixed it.
Bakugou shook as tears began to fall onto the paper. He couldn’t believe it. Everything started coming together now. The reason you were so distracted was because you were setting this up for him. You were always on the phone because you were assembling pieces and ordering gifts for him. You weren’t cheating on him with Shinsou. You were making sure he could find something that you needed for him. Y/N L/N was truly the best girlfriend in the world. Scratch that, she is the best girlfriend in the world. No scratch that too, she’s just the best, period. And Bakugou’s idiotic self ruined everything for him. All because he couldn’t have a little faith in his teddy bear. As Katsuki cried and cried, he set everything aside.
He took the petals off his bed. He didn’t deserve it. He blew out the candles around his room. He didn’t deserve it. He popped the balloons, and ignored the food. He laid in bed with more tears than ever, and looked at the ceiling. He finally turned to his side to fall asleep, but not before grabbing the picture on his bedside nightstand. A picture of you and him. He remembers that picture oh so clearly. It was his birthday, and while he didn’t want to celebrate, you did everything in your power to make it the best one yet. And you did just that. Bakugou hugged that picture so tight, because he didn’t have you in his arms tonight. He didn’t think he would ever have you in his arms again. So Bakugou Katsuki continued to cry until he was asleep, escaping from the reality of him losing his love, his teddy bear, his princess, and his Y/N.
Bakugou Katsuki never lost, no. He’s always been ahead, always number one, always the best. He always won and achieved and nothing ever stopped him. Except this time, the only thing that stopped him and caused him to lose, was himself. He lost. He lost his everything. His world, his rock, his heart, his Y/N. He’s lost without her in his life, and at this point he thinks he’s lost at life. There was nothing that could fix him unless it was you coming back to him.
Bakugou Katsuki? He’s lost.
A/N: HOLY SHIT! That was my very first writing piece and it was just a Drabble of a thought I’ve been having. Sorry if it’s a little off and weird, I’m still new to writing but hopefully I’ll get better. This was NOT spell checked so my apologies for any mistakes. I hope you enjoyed reading this! Thx for the love!
#bakugou angst#bakugou oneshot#bakugou imagine#bakugou katsuki x reader#bakugo x reader#bakugou katsuki#my hero academia#my hero fanfic#my hero academy fanfiction#my hero x reader#bakugou x y/n#bhna bakugou#bakugo angst#bakugou fanfiction#bnha angst
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Anon asked: maybe a continuation of the peter b parker kid thing where they finally confront the mom and get the readers things back 😩💞💞
a/n: ask and thou shall receive! this spent so long in the drafts bc i felt so insecure about it tbh, so any feedback is appreciated! I love seeing messages about what you guys think! really keeps me motivated! also, requests are open
Warnings: mentions of past abuse
Peter was sitting at the kitchen table, constantly looking at the clock. It was almost 5pm, you were supposed to be home an hour and a half ago. Yes, he keeps track of everyone's schedules, yes he knows the exact second you should be walking through the door. He's already texted you, but maybe you had detention. Nah, you were a good student, he highly doubted you'd have to stay after school.
His phone finally rang, and he was way too quick answering it.
"You okay?"
"I need some help."
"What is it?" he was already out the door.
You sighed, knowing he was probably going to give you an earful later.
"Well, it's a really long story, right.. But my mom showed up after school-"
"Are you okay?"
"I'm fine, I think. Anyways, we got into it on the way home, which is no- Not normal." you adjusted how you were sitting, "And since she was dragging me back to the house, I figured I'd just get my crap and come home, right? Makes sense, saves us the tri-"
"She took you without permission?"
"Technically she is my m-...Parent. I guess, y'know, legally she can do whatever- But..Okay." you began to feel bubbles of anxiety and pain and even resentment form deep in your core, "She locked me out." You rubbed your neck.
"Are you," he paused, looking around at all the faces passing by him, "Still there?"
"Yeah. Unfortunately. I'm sorry."
"What are you sorry for? Don't apologize, you didn't do anything."
"I keep causing problems for everyone."
"Not for me. Or Mj."
It was quiet on your end.
"You still there?"
"Yeah."
"I'll be there in like ten minutes."
"You probably shouldn't."
"Nah, nah." He said, having a sudden wave of anger rush over him, "Let me take care of this."
And true to his word, Peter was there in ten minutes. You hopped up from your spot on the porch as he made his way up to the door and knocked on it as hard as he could. He gave you a reassuring pat on the back.
The door swung open, and your mother seemed awfully surprised and confused to see some random man just standing there. Peter held no emotion has he looked her dead in the eye, "Can we come in."
She opened the door wider so that way you two could step in.
"Go get your stuff." is all Peter said to you.
Wasting no time, and not wanting to be in the middle of a potential argument between the two, you skedaddled to your room. It almost felt like too much to be in there. It looked so empty and barren compared to your room at Peter and Mjs place. Seems really dull. Lifeless, almost. Dust covered every surface, which meant that nobody had ever even bothered to see if you were even still in there.
You heard their voices from the living room, but they seemed so distant, seeing as all you could focus on was every shitty thing that woman put you through.
You remember the day that you got bit. It made you deathly ill, and you just thought you were dying from some sort of allergic reaction to the spider bite. You tried to get her to take you to any doctor or anywhere that could help because all you could seem to see were stars.
Everything then was so loud. Everything was so bright. It was all too much, and you were certain that the reaper was waiting for you. What did she say?
"Suck it up and stop pretending. Everything has to be so dramatic with you."
Or that time you forgot a single item on the shopping list. You got this whole speech about how stupid you had to have been. To forget one item. It was the world's most useless item.
Everything else seemed to play all over again, all at once. Like a waterfall. It should've made you sad. It should've made you cry, or scream.
You recounted all the times you wanted to fight back, or just run away. Leave everything behind and just run until your legs gave out. But you never did. You always found some reason to linger.
The conversation was growing louder where Peter was.
"You aren't going to do this to them ever again. Sign the papers."
You nearly dropped your last belonging on the floor as you scrambled to your door. Papers? He wasn't serious. Well, obviously he was. He just said it.
"Fine. It's not like the-"
"Zip it. Sign the papers."
"Who are you anyways? The law? If so, whatever they've told you is a b-"
"Listen, lady. I didn't ask for any attitude. I told you to sign the papers." he seemed to huff in annoyance, "That doesn't require talking."
"I'm a good mother."
"And I'm the king of France."
"Really. I gave them a good home. I have fed them and kept them warm-"
"Really? You think you did all that? Or are you convincing yourself that you did all that?"
"I am-"
"Can I be honest with you?"
"Ye-"
"I've never said this about anyone, ever. I don't like speaking to or about anyone like this.. Ever, but, you? I think you're a piece of shit."
"Excuse me?"
"Oh, look. You finished signing the papers. I'll take those. Thank you."
Realizing that it was your time to go, you stuffed your blanket into your duffel bag and rushed out the door and down the hall. Peter looked at you, expecting to see at least three bags. But he only saw the one.
"Where's the rest of your stuff."
"Uhm," you shuffled around, pretending as thought you dropped some, "This...This is all my stuff."
"That can't be ri-" He laughed a little, and noting the expression on his face, you saw that he was NOT happy. "That? That single duffle bag is all you have? That's it?"
"Yes..." you took a step back, "This is all.."
"I can't believe it." he said, "You're joking! One bag worth of stuff?"
He turned his attention back to your mother, who, for the first time in your life, actually looked like she got caught red handed, "You're pathetic. Absolutely pathetic."
"But they're so u-"
"No! No, you don't get to talk anymore. You've done enough."
You awkwardly shuffled behind him, in the event that you two had to make a mad dash out the door. That and you needed to not be seen as you tried to hide your almost evil grin.
"The hell is wrong with you? You have this amazing kid, and THAT'S all you've ever gotten for them? And you sit there and call yourself a mother? Absolutely, without a doubt, bullshit. I'd be ashamed of myself to call myself a father if that's all I've provided for my kid. Don't even get me started on you as a person, we made that clear."
It almost felt cursed to hear him swear, seeing as he made it a point to tell you to not swear. Every time you did, you have to give a quarter to the swear jar. Mj was always on your side, though. She'd say a swear that was much worse and have to pay a dollar. Each word had a value.
"Maybe we should just go." you suggested, tugging on the sleeve of his arm, "She's not worth it anymore."
"She was never worth it, it seems."
You finally made eye contact with her, and the look in her eye. It's like she understood, but was choosing to not do anything about the situation. She could look sorry all she wanted, but you knew she wasn't.
"I'm sorry, Y/n. You know that right."
"That means nothing to me."
"I can change."
"If you can change now, that means you could've changed then. You just chose not to."
"But I'm your mother, you should realize how I feel. You should want-"
"You're not my mom. You stopped being my mom the first time you-" You turned towards the door and started walking towards it, "Whatever. You mean nothing to me."
You practically kicked open teh door just to leave, and Peter was right behind you, shouting about how he'd make sure to egg her house everyday, just to piss her off.
"Do you really think I'm amazing?" you asked, the walk home feeling rather quiet.
"I think you're more than that. Just can't put it into words."
"Did you really mean it...That we could egg her house?"
"You want to? There's a store right on the way home."
"How about tomorrow."
"I'll have to clear up my busy schedule. See if I can work in a drive by egging. Well, swing by egging."
"You promise?"
"You kidding? I haven't egged anyone's house since college."
You had so much more you wanted to get off you chest, but you opted to just talk about it at home, with everyone present. You wanted to talk about how you felt about everything, and the papers. Whatever those were. But you were, for the moment, busy laughing about Peter's story about how he used to Egg this one reporters house. Someone named Jonah.
You wonder if Jonah ever put two and two together.
#marvel imagine#marvel x reader#into the spider verse x reader#into the spiderverse imagine#peter b parker imagine#peter b parker x reader#peter parker imagine#spiderman imagine#spiderman x reader
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watched s11ep1
i will provide you with a quick review before i disappear back into the ether of twd avoidance
lots of spoilers under the cut. also i wrote way too much and i worked all night and haven’t slept so i didn’t bother to reread literally any of it, so it might be completely nonsensical, tho if you don’t expect that from me by this point idk whose blog you’ve been reading
enjoy:
hokay, first off, i’ll start by saying that i enjoyed it more than i expected to. i’ve been avoiding any sort of discussion about stuff, but my google algorithm is so fucked at this point that i still get recommended articles and stuff every now and then, so i was already pretty aware of what i was walking into, and was expecting it to be eh, but actually i prob enjoyed it more than i enjoyed the finale
(don’t get too excited tho, the finale was rly boring lmfao)
anyway
episode starts off with a tense scouting mission
it takes .005 seconds into the episode for caryl to exchange a look of longing, establishing that they are still having weird conflict and are both too fucking stubborn to do anything about it even tho they hate it desperately
i imagine that will continue for a while
rosita, kelly, carol, maggie, what’s her face with the bad hair, and lydia (i think that’s everyone?) lower down to some army bunker or something, where a bunch of walkers are taking a snooze, and the girls are very respectful of walker naptime, and do their best not to wake them up
obviously they eventually wake up, but i’ll get to that in a sec
as they’re tiptoeing through the walker tulips, there’s this split second where carol spots a machine gun, and looks at maggie with a face like, “can i plzzzz, i am mad horny for that machine gun,” but maggie tells her no. (i 110% expected her to defy orders and accidentally wake up all the walkers, but she actually behaved herself for once. well. mostly)
never fear, tho, after the girl gang collects a bunch of MREs they go back to wait for the dudes waiting up top to pull them up, and bc men ruin everything, one of the ropes break, and daryl catches it before it falls, but then a slow motion drop of blood falls on a walker’s face, and just like that, walker naptime is over, and carol uses her bow and arrow for two seconds before she is like “fuck this” and whips out the machine gun
yes, she is super hot using it
yes, daryl watches her do it
anyway, all the other girls get rescued, and carol is about to be pulled up, but bc she is a #girlboss, she first makes a beeline for one more crate full of MREs. daryl covers her while she gets the loot, and when she gets back up top they have another charged moment as carol hands him back his knife
just fuck already, jfc
titles!
cut to alexandria where everything is still not smilestimes
BUT, we do get to see uncle daryl run and hug rj and judith (and dog), and FUCKING HERSHEL JR, LIGHT OF MY LIFE is also there
istg, they could not have casted a better child, i a d o r e him
oh, and some friends of maggie’s show up too, idk
cut to a staff meeting where everyone is like, whomp whomp, we’re all gonna starve to death unless we figure out something quick
cue maggie going, “oh, i know where food is, but it requires me to tell you my tragic backstory, in case anyone didn’t watch my bottle episode”
she tells her dramatic backstory about all her friends getting slaughtered by the reapers for no apparent reason, and then she’s like “anyway, let’s go back there!”
no one thinks it’s a great idea, but a group of people decide to go anyway, including daryl and gabriel. rosita is super pissed that gabriel is going, and carol doesn’t go, probably partly bc it’s a shitty fucking idea, and also bc they have to keep caryl apart bc otherwise they’ll fix their problems ahead of schedule and they won’t be able to drag out the needless angst
daryl looks kind of annoyed that carol doesn’t volunteer to go
bitch, i thought you wanted her to stop putting herself in the line of fire! make up your damn mind!
moving on
cut to a thunderstorm, where, if you look closely, you’ll notice daryl is wearing the STUPIDEST hat i’ve ever seen. just get an umbrella, jfc
for some reason negan is with them, bc ig he knows his way around washington dc, and no one in six years has bothered to figure out how to get around the city and/or get a map, and he is like “hey guys, maybe we shouldn’t try to walk in this fucking hurricane,” and everyone is like “FUCK YOU NEGAN, YOU’RE NOT THE BOSS OF US!!!”
this will be a common occurrence
but eventually daryl is even like “actually, it’s rly unpleasant out here, and my hat is mad stupid, can we go inside plz?”
so they go inside an old metro station, which is actually a rly cool cinematic choice. i rly like the idea, and they executed it rly well
speaking of executions
there are some fucking RULL CREEPY walkers. idk why they bothered me so badly, but they were what they at first assumed were corpses wrapped up in tarps, but turns out none of them had been properly put down, so they go through killing these rotted bodies that had supposedly been there since The Fall, and it’s very gross and cool
this entire time, btw, negan is like “hey, i know i’m a shitty person, but i have some rational arguments about why we shouldn’t be doing this right now,” and everyone is like, “FUCK YOU NEGAN, YOU’RE NOT THE BOSS OF US!!!” and he’s just like “god fucking damnit”
(i forgot to mention that at one point, when they’re headed into the metro station, negan is trying to warn ppl of the potential danger, and everyone is ignoring him, and he tries to talk to daryl, and daryl is like “fuck you, you think we’re BUDDIES?” and negan is like “oh, ok, so you’re gonna be like that too? fanfreakingtastic” and it’s very funny)
anyway. a fat monster zombie escapes its tarp at one point, and tries to eat some npc, and negan saves him, again is like “hey, anyone else realize that this is a FUCKING BAD PLAN?”, and everyone is like “we don’t care, you’re still shitty and we’re not listening to you, and you don’t actually care about random npc i would literally not be able to pick out in a lineup bc his face is so generic, you’re not the boss of us!!!”
it’s at this point that negan finally is like, “why am i even here? bc i know how to get around washington dc? do none of you have a map?” and i was like, “right?! that’s what i said!”
it’s then revealed that maggie only brought negan along to murder him under the guise of “oops, he got hurt in the line of duty, it wasn’t my fault,” and daryl has this look on his face that says, “i seriously need to stop hanging out with lethal women bent on revenge bc it’s gonna give me high blood pressure,” and maggie has a badass moment where she points a gun she has for some reason at negan and is like “i have like, one shred of human compassion left inside of me, and if you keep pushing me i will fucking kill you without a second thought, so shut the hell up”
(in her defense, negan had just dropped glenn’s name to purposely antagonize her, which was rude as hell)
(for the record, i’m completely on maggie’s side here, but negan still is right that trapping themselves in a metro station is a bad call)
anyway, moving away from that briefly
i think this jump cut happens sooner, i don’t actually remember, but whatever who cares, point is, we get to the part of the show that actually matters, and that’s anything involving my love, juanita “princess” sanchez
and also eugene, yumiko, and ezekiel
they are being asked increasingly invasive questions by commonwealth ppl, some of which i wish they actually would of answered (what do they use to wipe their asses with?? surely toilet paper has long since become extinct)
zeke, who is so much more tolerable as a character now that he’s not larping as a king, has this incredibly weird and sort of sexually charged moment with a dude in an orange stormtrooper costume, where he’s like, “i bet you were an asshole cop back before The Fall, you stupid fascist, #fuckthepolice, mb literally? idk, this moment has a lot of pent up aggression that could easily translate to hate sex, it might just be the intense eye contact, but w/e, let’s just move along,” and then he has a coughing fit to remind the audience that he’s currently dying of cancer, and orange stormtrooper is like “lolz, loser, drink some water you dumb piece of shit”
cut to the wholesome foursome sitting at a picnic table in a guarded courtyard eating gruel, and yumkio, who finally has a personality, and princess are like “hey, this place fucking sucks, can we leave?” and zeke is like, “yeah, i met this orange stormtrooper who i think might be dtf and/or murder, so we should probably bounce”
but eugene is like, “but i want some hot stephanie ass, and also some bullshit excuse about how mb commonewealth will save alexandria” which, they left before things went super downhill, right? idr. it was after hilltop fell, but they don’t know alexandria got fucked either, if i recall? w/e, not important
two seconds after he says this, they talk to some people who are like “we’ve been here for four months, or maybe it’s been nine, i don’t actually remember, i’ve stopped processing the passage of time,” and the wholesome foursome takes this as a bad sign, tho that’s just the life i’ve lived as a night worker during a pandemic, so i was like #mood
but then they watch some guy get dragged away screaming to get “reprocessed” and eugene is like “ok, nvm, let’s bounce”
(my theory on what “reprocessing” is, is that they’re stuck in a room and have to watch hours and hours of customer service training videos on vhs from the 90s)
i definitely got my jump cut scenes mixed up bc i think the negan accusing maggie of a murder plot thing happened in between this scene and then the next commonwealth scene, but w/e, i’ll just finish what happens in the commonwealth arch
the wholesome foursome are trying to hatch a plan to escape, except princess, my love, is distracted watching some stormtroopers flirt, and the other three are like “wtf, dude, how can you even tell any of them apart?” and princess then tells them every stormtroopers backstory bc she is brilliant and pays rly close attention to shit, and the other three are like, “this is useful information, thank you for being an insane person”
their plan involves yumiko and eugene dressing up as stormtroopers and leading princess and zeke out of the place, which works fine actually, except on their way out they come across the Depressing Wall of Probably Mostly Dead Missing Loved Ones
they’re about to leave, when princess is like, “wait, yumiko, you’re on here, that’s weird huh?”
sure enough, yumiko is on the wall, with a note from ig her sister
the scene ends with yumiko going, “guys...i can’t leave...i have tragic backstory to unveil”
tragic backstory to be continued ig
back in murder metro town, npc and some other npc have stolen all the supplies, there’s a train blocking the track, and a horde of walkers are coming towards them, so things are not going fantastic
they horde is too big to take down, so they start to climb on top of the train car to get away
but dog runs away!
and daryl, being every pet owner ever, is like “gotta go get my dog, guys, try not to get killed while i’m gone, c u soon!” and he ducks under the train and disappears
#priorities
the episode ends with maggie climbing up the train car but getting grabbed by a walker and dangling off the edge, and negan is there and they have a lion king moment where maggie is like, “scar! help me!” and negan is like “long live the king, bitch” and walks away into the shadows, leaving maggie to a potential death
which, while i know isn’t actually going to happen, would be a really fucking funny move on the writers’ part
like, “look, lauren’s back! and now she’s dead, bet you didn’t expect that!”
anyway
my assumption is negan will actually end up helping her up or something, continuing his ambiguous morality bullshit that actually isn’t ambiguous bc he BEAT GLENN TO DEATH WITH A FUCKING BAT WRAPPED IN BARBED WIRE IN FRONT OF HIS PREGNANT WIFE
the maggie/negan arch is kind of dumb, but whatevs, i’ll tolerate it, as long as my boy glenn gets justice in the end
anyway, cue credits!
final assessment: good episode. i’m much more interested in commonwealth than the reapers, tho i am hoping that daryl’s personality-less ex turns out to be a monster killing machine with no conscience, that’ll be fun. princess is a gift from god. hershel jr needs his own tv show. needs more carol (and caryl)
the end! going back into my walking dead free chamber! see you next episode!
-diz
#i didn't mean to recap the entire fucking episode lol#sorry#it's to make up for my lack of content lately#or something#anyway#caryl#twd s11ep1#twd s11 spoilers#dunlap tp
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i like to hc (or i think it’s canon. like it was heavily implied) that athy has a mental illness..? depression i think. ( pls let me have this ok! i know it’s so cliche but i also have mdd and her character just hits me esp her reincarnation as a person in our world and she... died 😭😭😭) also i like how functional she is? like yes she has dark thoughts a lot, but she has a good facade. she is strong (i mean she’s lived under poverty, no parents AND most likely worked at customer service) works hard, and smiles and keeps doing all of it, she doesn’t want to die bc of claude. do we know if she overdosed on purpose? was it an accident? we can’t know exactly. *LONG (AND I MEAN LONG) rant ahead i tried to make it make sense and this is just my own experience i’m sure other people will see it differently. you don’t have to read this, so please skip it if you don’t want to read this! and if you did and if you’d like, tell me what you think x*
what we do know is that she opened her eyes and she’s suddenly... a pitiful princess. and you know what? she’s not having any of this. she doesn’t want to have yet another shitty life. and yes she’s tired and she keeps wondering if what she’s doing is right. if she’s making the right decisions. when it gets REALLY hard she thinks “i thought i’d finally be happy”. she’s felt so lonely, and scared, finding a real friend like jennette, i think her fear of possible death if jennette were to be noticed by claude is surpassed by her wanting an actual connection with someone. to be loved. and who better than her sister? 🥺🥺 LISTEN IM A FIRM BELIEVER WMMAP SHOULDNT HAVE ROMANCE AS A MAIN THEME (especially in the novel where everything is more fucked up, here it’s more family centered) idk why they were shoving a lucas romance so fast when my girl athy is having a breakdown. for me, she just needed a friend. i think she had finally found a healthy connection to someone. jennette is her sister. and! she loves athy unconditionally. she’s never scared of her because she knows jennette would never want to hurt her. in fact, jennette would almost die for her like twice. (talking manhwa) i wish we could have focused more on the sibling bond in this story because it does athanasia so good. and i think, it’s a parallel with ana and claude’s relationship. athanasia and jennette, they choose to love each other and i think that’s so sweet. peak writing there spoon 💓🤧
also it’s like. a really good depiction of mental illness too (even if it was maybe? unintentional bc we only see the dark thoughts a few times, when claudes in a coma, especially but that works great because it often just. lingers and that’s why ppl don’t get treated until it’s serious and more dangerous.) she’s high functioning. i can see a lot of typical behavior? for some of us it impairs us, won’t let you even get out of bed or take care of yourself. losing interest in things you liked before is common etc but for others! work and study and it’s SO hard and there’s bad thoughts and all you can do is. eat something because food doesn’t really fail ever. smile! distract yourself by doing daily tasks, etc ☠️ i hope this isn’t too tmi i don’t wanna overshare. maybe someone will relate lmao. ANYWAYS the amnesia arc, this is my favorite lucas, sort of. like you know how i’ve said before that i have a love-hate relationship with this dude. this is kinda why, i wanna elaborate 😭. because im so angry at him right now
ok so yes lucas is not great! and his relationship with athanasia is... uhh! kinda unhealthy 🥴 like i feel like athanasia clings to him because he’s literally the only person who is there, but not under normal circumstances it’s not really an effort on his part because he’s super powerful and he’s not in actual danger. so he can’t really relate to the magnitude of these events like a normal person would. he thinks blowing things up is gonna solve their problems (that’s not problem solving lucas) when something traumatic happens lucas is put there so we associate security to him. you also said that he’s been a victim of abuse. so i can understand why things are happening like this (i’m not happy about it though they could have written something better😔) it’s sort of like clinging to people who show you the bare minimum of what is kindness because well. you’re scared of loneliness perhaps. or, you aren’t used to others being kind to you, and it feels nice. this can make some mentally ill people easy to manipulate, AND it can make others too clingy or controlling. i see it something like that. maybe in my case i like him bc of this? ☠️ i’m speaking from experience here
maybe athy has associated security with lucas. sense of security and the few instances where he’s kind, bc he’s bitch shaped, in the middle of all of the uncertainty. it’s not the best support someone could be giving and he’s definitely not a good person, but no one (jennette should but also we know they’re pushing for lucas/athanasia interactions so they just won’t let her be there with athy ugh 😩) else is there when athanasia is having these traumatic experiences (again probably doing this on purpose and it DOES sound manipulative doesn’t it? not lucas, the writing). i was actually expecting character development for lucas bc of the amnesia arc.
i finally saw him caught off guard for once, because athanasia is actively having “dark thoughts” (i’m calling them that but i really mean suicidal this is where i get the idea she did kill herself), and he didn’t want to show her the world tree branch because he’s scared she will die, that she will “leave him”. he cares for her but it’s a little more on the unhealthy side bc they’re both mentally ill. moving on. he also shows her the tree branch because hes scared she is feeling hopeless (very depressed). sure it hurts but if it means she stays alive, he will try to aid her if it makes her feel better. when he sees her like this, he relents and shows her it. the tree tells her of this method to cure her dad, and he gets angry because it will put her in danger and it’s uncertain that it will actually work. see, this is where i actually liked lucas. helping claude isn’t possible for him. in contrast to how he talks about aeternitas being weak, and being out of touch because well he’s THE wizard. this is one of the few things that he cannot do, so he is sort of in the same place as athy right now. a feeling of helplessness? he can’t do anything, as powerful as he is, to cure her father. and you know? it’s nice. i wish he had stayed like this.
if they hadn’t made him so powerful i would have actually preferred him more as a love interest. it’s really difficult to connect to him because he is almost invincible most of the time, except for in the amnesia arc. before and after this time period, he is more cocky and so sure of himself, it’s like he can’t bring himself to feel empathy for others. so when i saw him be sensitive and unsure i wanted him to keep going on this path of becoming a better person, a better friend for athy, and realizing that he’s not all powerful. just because someone is mentally ill doesn’t excuse being a jerk, and two mentally ill people being in a relationship doesn’t mean that the relationship has to be toxic! but there’s steps in order for it to work and so they don’t sink together... athy and him could have actually helped each other (i’m not saying fix each other here, that’s not how it works) if he could just open up and be vulnerable, ack if they didn’t try to paint him as the usual love interest all the time. same as her! i want her to talk about her trauma and her problems to someone so bad, lucas knows she reincarnated, but they don’t talk about it. unfortunately the narrative is pushing the typical shoujo josei approach which has toxic gender roles and its so boring 😔😔 the incredibly strong and possessive ml and a weaker fl who needs help. right now i dislike lucas a lot, aack like really... he’s gone back to being inconsiderate and a bitch. hate it here
the only other person i know of that helped athy was my boy kiel, but! this child did have a lot to risk, in contrast. by running after athy he’s going against not only his own family but against claude which means sort of... certain death for him. he’s ACTUALLY contributing to this relationship by sacrificing things, putting effort in order to help her. hell, falling in love with her was probably one of his first choices. something that is “him”. it’s struggling if you’re a normal human person. again, we could have kiel and jennette to balance out the lucas and claude interactions but they are REALLY pushing for a lucas thing here bc he’s the novel’s love interest so they will reduce kiel to a second thought when i really think, even if he isn’t an all powerful wizard, that he could offer better support to athanasia and relate more to her than, well, most characters would, and in a healthy way. he would be more sensitive and would comfort her, not saying that they could simply solve it by destroying things but actually telling her, that yes, she’s right, that’s a very difficult situation and she shouldn’t have to go through that. he would not be able to fully understand but he’d try to help her in any way possible. because he was always on her side. it’s honestly great. there’s probably symbolism in there but i’m too stupid to notice. something about changing your fate. there’s certainly parallels between athy and kiel because they’re both changing the future. making choices for THEM. choosing to follow happiness. 🧍something like that someone will probably say it better than i ever will. 👉👈
and last, but not least, i wanted to talk about claude. it’s a similar situation with claude and lucas. he’s the only father athanasia ever had (unfortunately) and any fatherly love athy ever received is from him even if this dude REALLY needs to stop projecting and being violent and distant there’s so many things wrong with claude and he’s so complex. i enjoy his character but he’s a horrible father. at least he’s trying now unlike a certain black cat with red eyes instead of green ones. athanasia actually confronts him... anyways. mental illnesses are often hereditary (i’m not opening MY can of worms though but it runs in the family) we see how VERY unhealthy family dynamics have traumatized the obelian royal family for generations (aka intergenerational trauma babeyyy 🗣😩☠️) and it finally culminates in ana being possessed by aety, in claude becoming a tyrant, in him executing athanasia, and jennette unintentionally making him worse. aeternitas takes over the throne and well. it’s kinda the end of the empire lol.
we can see how this environment affects athanasia, in the first timeline especially, it is a reflection of her life the second time around, and the third time again. sure, she didn’t exactly inherit claude’s alcoholism (i’d recommend she doesn’t risk it though. stay away from alcohol) or violent behavior, BUT she is definitely suffering from a mental illness (like most obelian royalty) and she has also adopted the tendency of drowning herself in work just like he does. and she’s a little desensitized to the violence. it’s a bit of a softer blow because she didn’t internalize it as much as if she had been a baby, being an adult in a child’s body. but it’s still there. and claude got the most of it, a lot more than anastacius did. being an illegitimate child, etc. the person who got away from all of this mess and broke the cycle of abuse is jennette. she was raised in the alpheus manor and we can’t say roger is the best father because he has a lot of flaws. he’s using jennette and pushing ijekiel to be the next head, and probably instilling the wrong ideas in both of them since they were children. he’s put them both in danger with their greed. however, that will always be better than living in the palace. jennette has been affected by the way she was raised but in a very different way than she ever would have had she lived in the palace. ana will not be the best father either, but he hasn’t been in claude’s position who was most subjected to trauma in that same place than anastacius ever was. so he’s not on his level of fucked up, fortunately jennette will be ok with him.
i think jennette and ijekiel should have stayed closer to athanasia and they have a lot more importance than many people give them credit for. it’s a breath of fresh air from everything heavy that happens around her. hell, not even lucas was free from abuse and he has a lot of issues stemming from abandonment etc. they’re sort of the healthiest bonds athanasia has and she NEEDS those! she really does. i think i’ve talked too much already, 😭 idk what it’s supposed to be. analysis? rant? being angry that there’s SO much potential for more themes because the word building is simply incredible? so i’ll leave it here. thanks for listening and if you’ve read until here! don’t wanna force you to answer or anything. and sorry for clogging ur inbox
Headcanon accepted! I like to hc LP Athy to have an Avoidant Personality Disorder & depression. This is probably contradicted by canon since Lithium said LP Athy crying was so out of the character that even Claude was suprised by her breakdown but since it's the only panels where she has dialogue I imagine her to be similar to Hilise Inoaden in her first life: cries easily but only at night when she's alone by herself, hypersensitive, feels unsafe in big crowds or when alone with strangers, clings to every gesture that can be interpreted as kindness, tendency to excuse the actions of the people she cares about (really how has she not lost hope for Claude in those 18 years of her life facing his rejection and the noblility's mockery?).
Talking about mental illnesses being heredity, baby Claude could have also ended up with an Avoidant Personality disorder if he hadn't freezed his heart, I think. But now I hc him with an Antisocial Personality Disorder, Like Lucas.
But I don't think wmmap is good representation of mental illness. You could argue that Lucas' and Claude's "psychopathic/sociopathic" tendancies are mainly caused by dark magic and not their childhood trauma. Like even though Claude seems to have ASPD, baby Claude never showed signs of a conduct disorder. I know this isn't a must but still. Athy's trauma only gets bought up when spoon needs to stirr drama between her and Claude. It doesn't really impair her much in her everyday life. There isn't a day where she has a hard time getting out of bed or a day where she tries pursuing her hobbies but nothing brings her joy anymore. She still manages to be productive. She had no problems to interact with strangers and blend in with the tea party girl's in high society, even though their mother's betrayed her later and some of them surely did the same in the first timeline (ignoring Athy in favour of Jennette), yet she doesn't really harbour any resentment against the noble's that harmed her in her first life.
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Silence (Part 4)
Masterlist//Series Masterlist
Peter Parker x Stark!reader
Summary: You and Peter have been best friends ever since he stepped foot into the avengers compound. After a year of being friends you realize you’ve developed a crush on him, but he doesn’t feel the same way… at least, you don’t think he does.
A/N: This is the second to last part I think! I was gonna do just one more long part but I want to keep this series going for a little longer so I decided to split it into 2 more parts so this one is kinda short. Please keep sending requests bc I’ve really enjoyed writing them and I’m hopefully gonna post more of them soon <3
Warnings: language, little bit of angst
~~~~~~~~
It’s been three days since you last spoke to Peter. Three long, antagonizing days.
The fact that Peter kept ignoring you for MJ just pushed you to your breaking point. Plus, your chance with Peter is slim to none at this point, and it would just hurt more to stay so close to him knowing that he would never love you as much as you love him. Despite all the shitty things he’s done in the past few days, you still love Peter, which makes ignoring him all the more painful. But you had no other choice.
You hadn’t had a proper conversation with him since the dreadful events of your “friendiversary,” which for you and Peter was practically unheard of. You passed him in the halls of the compound and occasionally shot him a glance at team meetings, but other than that you ignored him completely.
Sitting on your bed, you pick up your phone.
14 New Messages from Peter
P: Y/N?
P: Y/N can we please talk
P: why are you ignoring me
P: what did i do wrong can we please talk
P: Y/N why won’t you respond
P: how long are you gonna ignore me for
You stop reading after the sixth text. He’s been texting you constantly, but you never respond. To be honest, you don’t actually know how long you plan on ignoring him for. Obviously, you have to hash it out at some point, but you don’t think that will be anytime soon. Well, at least you hope it won’t be anytime soon.
Suddenly, FRIDAY announces, “Miss. Stark, Mr. Stark has requested you in his lab.”
You sigh, “What for?”
“Official Avengers business, so I would hurry.”
That peaks your interest, so you quickly leave your room and jog downstairs to your dad’s lab. You scan your fingerprint on the keypad, and the glass doors automatically side open, granting you access.
“Y/N, great, you’re here. I’ve got some big news,” your dad states.
“Really? What is it?” you ask excitedly.
“I’ve talked it over with the rest of the team, and we’ve all decided that you’re ready.”
“What!? Like ready to be an Avenger?” at this point, you’re practically shaking with excitement.
“Yes. You’ve had plenty of training, and we could use some extra help, so I’ve decided to make you an official part of the Avengers. Congrats honey.”
You rush to hug your dad, squeezing him tightly, “Thank you thank you thank you! You’re the best!” You pull away, “Does that mean I get to go on missions now?”
“Not just yet Y/N, you’ll just be starting off with patrol right now. I want to make sure you’re really ready.”
Normally, you would be opposed to this, begging him to let you go on a real mission, but at this point any excuse to get out of the compound and away from Peter was good enough for you.
“Okay! Can I go today?”
“Actually, that works out great! Peter has patrol in Queens tonight, so you can go with him. He can give you the lay of the land, tell you how stuff works and all,” he smirks.
“No, absolutely not,” you answer sternly, “I am not going with him.”
“Then I guess you won’t get to be part of the team.”
“WHAT? THAT’S NOT FAIR!”
“Y/N, now is not the time to be raising your voice at me. You can’t pick and choose who you fight with, just like you can’t pick and choose who you fight against. If you can’t figure out how to work out your stupid teenage problems, then I can’t have you on the team. I don’t want you jeopardizing a mission because you can’t work out a stupid problem with a boy.”
“But dad-“
“No buts. You either do your job or you’re not a part of the team. Understand?”
“Fine.” You storm out of the room, upset that yet another exciting thing is ruined by Peter.
As you hurry back to your room, you glare at Peter who is sitting on the couch watching TV. He starts to get up to talk to you, but is stopped by Nat, who follows you upstairs. Before you get the chance to slam your door shut, she catches it and slips into your room after you, shutting the door behind her.
“Okay, what’s going on with you and the kid?”
“Nothing.”
“Come on Y/N, it’s obviously not nothing. Everyone’s noticed that you’ve been ignoring him. Even Clint commented on it this morning, and he doesn’t give a shit about anything that goes around here.”
“Why does it matter?”
“Because I know you have feelings for him.”
Taken aback, you stutter, “W-what? No I don’t. You have no proof.”
“Oh please, I see the way you act with him, or well, how you used to act around him before you decided to start ignoring him for no reason.”
When you don’t respond, she sits down next to you on your bed. “Look Y/N, I know we’re not best friends, but you can talk to me. Just tell me what’s going on and maybe I can help. You can’t just keep your feelings bottled up like this. Trust me.”
“Fine,” you huff, “I do like him, but he doesn’t like me.”
“Is that why you haven’t been talking to him?”
“Sort of. But there’s more to it. He likes this girl from his school named MJ, and he’s been choosing her over me for a while now. And then the other day I had this whole day planned out for us because it was our one year anniversary of first meeting and becoming friends, and he invited MJ and one of his other friends to come with us,” tears start to roll down your cheeks, “And he spent the whole day with her, like he was purposefully avoiding me and rubbing it in my face that he doesn’t like me like that, that he’ll only see me as a friend.”
You scoot closer to Nat, and surprisingly, she pulls you into a short, but comforting hug. It actually means a lot to you, given that she’s not really the hugging type, and it makes you feel a but better knowing that she’s willing to comfort you.
“I’m sorry about that Y/N. It doesn’t seem like something Peter would do.”
“I know, which is why I’m even more pissed at him.”
Nat stares at the wall for a few seconds, seemingly deep in thought.
“I think you should tell him how you feel, tell him that you like him.” she states pointedly.
“What? Why would I do that?” you exclaim, taken aback.
She stands up off the bed and starts to walk out of the room, “Trust me. I have a hunch about it.”
She smirks and swiftly walks out the door, leaving you completely and utterly confused. For the time being, you decide to ignore it, ruling out the idea of confessing your feelings to a boy who doesn’t even like you, and who you are extremely mad at. That would be insane, right?
~~~~~~~~
Taglist: add yourself to my taglist here!
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All: @pxkajesus @hollanddolanfangirl @roseke @agentsofparker @lifeasjazzz @damnrancidchicken @loopyolivia @iwannabekilledtwice @rafehogwarts @non-eexistent @rosiexx8 @nearlydanger9 @realityisabitch07 @midgardassassins @jbreenr @cap-marvxl @ellesmythe @deepestcolorgiantopera @that-one-person @clandestine-nerd @nevertrustapanda16 @ohabbyoh @rxmanxff @bubbleskz @quinn-spn58 @baby-pogue @strangebouquetqueen @thatforgottenangel @pjmjams @tiredstudenttrinity @isabella-bby @i-will-take-care-of--you @hollandprkr @ladykxxx08
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But doesn’t thyme acknowledge that? He clearly states that he hates violent thyme and it’s not something he’s proud of and he even goes as far as to acknowledge that this stems out of his own feelings of insecurity and inadequacy because of childhood neglect. I’m not trying to ignore what he did with gorya at all or trying to justify the whole “she has to heal him” trope but i think it’s unfair that people are just glossing over the fact that this is someone who lacks emotional control and maturity bc lmao he’s never received an ounce of love or even attention from his own mother. Also he very clearly says that “I want to be someone you deserve” acknowledging that he still has work to do and that it’s something HE himself has to take responsibility for 🤷🏽♀️
He talks about their past yes but not about that specific event. Shitty actions before the relationship and the violence while actively dating are two very different things. I get that he understands why his behaviour is shitty and I fully understand why he is the way he is. He was a victim first before his trauma made him into a bully and he's learning to unlearn all that. Which is great.
My issue is that the creators brushed aside that specific scene and lumped it together with the rest of his past when the circumstances were very different and it should have been addressed separately. It's not about who Thyme is as a person, my problem is with how the writers treated that situation. Sure, Thyme is too immature to fully understand these issues. But Gorya isn't. Gorya is smart and strong willed and has so much self-respect. So why doesn't she get to start that conversation? We all know a person as headstrong as her would have brought it up, demanded promises that he never lose his cool around her like that. But they don't let her do that, instead she just apologises for misunderstanding the situation and let's it go, not even mentioning the fact that his reaction was way overboard and scarily violent.
This is a story that has always been problematic due to it's toxic messaging. We all know that. But this is an adaptation that is being presented as more progressive and less toxic by its fanbase, and I do think there are scenes that they handled quite well, as such it is open to more criticism. It's 2022 and people, especially women, aren't as eager to let these toxic tropes exist in romances and that is a change I wholeheartedly welcome. So yeah, a lot of people are going to expect and even demand better, more nuanced takes. Why shouldn't they?
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Natalie Holt implying that Loki slept with Sif before cutting off her hair honestly makes my blood boil. The first Thor movie showed us a sympathetic character that was an outcast in Asgard, and a scapegoat in his family. Everything now just seems like Marvel trying to take all of that away. So many people are saying, "Well, now I know why Sif doesn't like him, lol!" And that is exactly as intended. We are supposed to see Loki as an ass and everyone else as a saint for putting up with him. :(
I'm just really baffled at how it's either a) supposed to make sense, or b) explain anything about their dynamic?
Like, okay, let's assume that they do hate each other bc they slept together. Why would that be? Even if you catch feelings and get rejected, that's not really justification to hate someone. Ideally you'd just go your own separate ways but since Loki and Sif shared a social circle, that probably wasn't an option, in which case the next best thing is to just be civil while you move on/get over the feelings. No hatred necessary, and certainly not for centuries.
I don't believe that either of them is stubborn enough to harbor a grudge over being rejected. Sif bc I wouldn't believe that she caught feelings for Loki anyway, and Loki bc while he would certainly be hurt, and his pride would be wounded, I just don't see him holding onto that for longer than it would take for him to move past it.
And where is the hair-cutting supposed to come in? Are we implying here that Loki is so childish and petty that he cut off Sif's hair in retaliation for her not returning his feelings? (Seeing it written down like that, I am guessing this is exactly the implication, bc of course it is, smh.) Was he 12 when they fucked, or ??
So here's the thing, though. You pointed out that the first Thor movie showed us a sympathetic character who was an outcast and a scapegoat but no, actually, it didn't. Thor 1 showed us a jealous, vindictive loner turned villain. That's the problem - the MCU isn't taking anything away as much as they're trying to re-establish the characterization they intended for him to have all along.
Thor 1 left things out that would provide more context to Loki's motivations. Thor 1 actively deleted scenes that showed Loki as sympathetic. Thor 1 set up a "good brother vs evil brother" black-and-white dichotomy between Thor and Loki, in which the narrative and the supporting characters all behaved as though Loki was innately the evil brother and there wasn't even a question about that. Thor 1 was Thor's movie, and while I obviously have no problem with that, it being Thor's movie means that to a lot of the audience, Loki was never going to be perceived as sympathetic. In order to make Thor the hero of his story, Loki has to be the villain and most people just accept that at face-value.
Is Loki sympathetic? Yes. Was he an outcast in his society and a scapegoat in his family? Yes. Was he evil at heart? No. Did he do bad things? Yes. Did he intend for them to turn out as terribly as they did? No. Etc.
These are all things that a lot of us know because we've taken the time to know them. One needs to be interested/invested enough in Loki to make the effort of interpreting his motivations and his characterization but, that said, having a vested enough interest in Loki to be an active fan doesn't necessarily mean interpreting him sympathetically. There's this weird divide and things that seem obvious in hindsight, such as Loki's sympathy as a character or the nuances of what he was really trying to achieve in Thor 1, are things that a lot of the audience + his fandom either don't pick up on or don't care to see.
There's a reason 2011-13 Loki isn't as popular as Ragnarok Loki. There's a reason there are so. many. posts. in this fandom that start off with "I love Loki, but -" and then proceed to drag him. There's a reason why a lot of his fans are like "lol I mean he did murder all those people though?" or why the "you just like Loki/apologize for Loki bc you want to fuck Tom" argument is so prevalent. There's a reason why headcanons like "Loki just fucked his way into the GM's inner circle" are treated as canon, or why nobody questions whether or not it actually made sense for Loki to randomly betray Thor right before the obedience disk scene.
The reason is that Thor 1 didn't show us who Loki really was, and because of his portrayal in that movie and in Avengers (subtext and word-of-god confirmation is clearly insufficient for the wider audience to realize that Loki wasn't acting of his own accord - no, he's just evil), there are very many fans who are just never going to see him as anything besides villainous at worst or "a fun but greasy little shit" at best, who causes trouble and does shitty things for the lulz.
"Loki cut Sif's hair for no other reason than to be a dick after they fucked" falls perfectly in line with that characterization, and the result is that you get tons of fans who are like "LOL that's SO Loki!" or "No wonder Sif hates him!" etc. And if, in 2021, ten years after Loki was introduced into the MCU, people are still coming away from his narrative arc + his own series believing that he is, or ever was, just a rotten little shit who caused trouble for the lulz? Then that is clearly the Loki that they see, that they stan, and that means whatever he means to them, and regardless of how our portion of the fandom may object and cry foul, there's honestly just nothing we can do about it.
So, I mean, there we are. People can feel however they want about Loki. It is what it is. And I think I'm just tired of getting upset about it. Re Loki/Sif, I will share my opinion that it's a trash headcanon and laugh at it, but I'm tired of allowing myself to get genuinely upset about how other people perceive this character, especially when there's nothing I can do about it and the only person who ends up suffering is me when my mental health spirals downward (bc I care way too much about fiction and I have no problem admitting it).
I didn't intend for this to be so long, and obviously this is not any kind of rebuttal against you or your ask personally, anon. It just gave me an opportunity to put into words what I've been feeling for quite awhile. It is what it is.
I also feel it's worth mentioning, again, that I think Natalie's soundtrack is absolute fire and I have nothing but respect for her as the composer in this series, but I do not think that earns her any merit in how she perceives these characters. Loki/Sif is her headcanon, and she also said that Loki looks at Sylvie the way he looks at his mother, which is like, and how do you think he's looking at his mother, Nat? Cause uh. I don't think they are the same. I know most people won't agree, but I feel like her words need to be taken with a grain of salt and not accepted as canon based on nothing more than her position of being someone who worked on the show.
I should put this behind a cut, but meh. Also, I know a lot of people reblogged/added onto my Loki/Sif post from last night and I was going to engage but I just don't have time, so please accept this as my general response + stance on the entire clusterfuck.
#asks#charlotte replies#a nonny mouse#this isn't really negativity i don't think#just my feels#loki pokey artichokey#if anyone feels i should add any tags they've blacklisted just let me know and i'll add them
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Do you think Yohan always planned to fake his death and join Elijah in Switzerland, or did he originally intend to really die with the rest of the 'villains'? Part of me thinks that would fit with his pre-Gaon conception of himself, as a monster, not deserving of love, not necessarily seeing a role for himself in Elijah's life beyond getting revenge for her/Isaac, and financing an opportunity to help her recovery. Or do you think regardless of that, he'd still never plan to leave her on her own?
i didn't mean to put off this ask for so long. i was busy, but i also wanted to wrap my thoughts around this before i tried answering. not bc i didn't have an answer to begin with but yohan and death is a subject i'd like to approach, but i'm not entirely sure how i'd like to make the analysis of it, and i'm not sure i ever will.
so that leaves me to answer it here in the best way i can because point blank: i do believe yohan intended to die by the end. i do think he had two plans in place since the beginning (dying or not dying and helping elijah), but of course, until that final moment, he wasn't ever going to know the truth. that end scene of him blowing up the court was a 50/50 shot. he had a plan to make it out, but it wasn't a guarantee.
but lets also back up a bit because before we get to that point, i think it's necessary to point out that the reason yohan gets away and does all of the shit that he does is because he knows that he might not make it out alive. it's why he's reckless. it's why he bends the law the way that he does. yohan's actions prove, over and over again, that he does not care for himself. he does not care to live except to protect elijah. there are so many small moments of this. we call yohan unhinged out of fun, but i think there is truth in it because i've mentioned this casually before (and part of my words above in terms of not necessarily knowing how to approach this just yet) is that yohan is almost...... suicidal himself.
he's reckless. he's said that he does not care about the actual law. his goal has always been getting revenge for his brother, especially for his niece who grew up without her parents. yohan never truly cared about the bigger picture until gaon came along. if we leave out gaon and think of the plot as such, yohan would've been able to prevail much quicker, i'd say. he had a plan and was going to follow through with it no matter what, regardless of the ending. and he knew going into it that there was a chance he wouldn't make it out alive.
which is why i think he partially also allowed elijah to blame him for her parent's death because if she hates him, it will be so much easier for her to forget him. she won't mourn him or miss him. she will be able to move on with her life and live it any which way she wants. but because yohan doesn't really understand kids, let alone elijah, what he fails to realize is that elijah doesn't actually hate her uncle. she's looking to get rid of all of the pent up hurt and frustration bc she never had an outlet to let all of that out. yohan fails to see that elijah cares for him and would miss him, to a degree, if he died.
so now, if we think of the plot with gaon, it twists everything on its head bc gaon has no need to be there within yohan's plans. yohan doesn't need gaon to do anything bc everything was already planned from the beginning. if anything, gaon came in and crashed some things, leaving yohan to pick up those pieces and continue pushing forward. biggest case in point, gaon's stubbornness and his arguments against yohan with the law and what he's doing.
see, gaon eventually comes to realize yohan's reasonings for doing what he's doing for his brother, but i feel like gaon thinks that even if that is part of yohan's plan involves revenge, how much does he think yohan is also doing this for the greater good and wanting to fix society? we know that yohan has no intention of that, but does gaon? and so no wonder gaon protests because if he thinks yohan is trying to fix a broken system (plus get revenge all in the same plot), no wonder gaon continues fighting yohan - he's under the belief that yohan is trying to make things better. but he's NOT.
which circles back to the idea that yohan had every intention of either making it out alive or dying. gaon opened his eyes that yes, maybe things could possibly be good. gaon made yohan question a lot of things along the way, especially his own humanness and realizing that he is worth something and not the monster he let himself believe he was, and what others told him he was. that wasn't part of the plan either, which is why it made it so much harder for yohan to go through with bombing the court because yohan's at a conflicting place of finally understanding gaon's hope but knowing that he only ever had revenge as an intent.
yohan's plan is derailed a bit by gaon being hope and introducing concepts yohan has lived without for so long. before then, yohan lived isolated with one clear goal in mind until gaon showed him he had a reason to live. i also said in another post that while gaon stopped yohan because he didn't want to see yohan going down a path he couldn't come back from, it was already too late at that point. yohan had already set his path long before gaon came into the picture and nothing he said or done would've changed that. but it DID given yohan more perspective and more heart, possibly being at peace even more so with dying knowing elijah would have gaon.
but instances within the show - of course, his two fake deaths. him steering gaon and himself off the road on the middle of the highway. him chasing after the minister's son. yohan asking soohyun to save gaon despite him literally bleeding out.
yohan does not care for himself. he does not care whether he lives or dies, as long as his plan is completed. we can talk til we're blue in the face about how yohan was wrong manipulating the law like he did and various other things, but the reason why? is because he did not care. and it wasn't because of him being a sociopath by any means. it was because he numbed his emotions, lied to himself, and used his love for his brother and elijah to propel him to a desired end with the possibility of his death involved. and quite frankly, that speaks volumes about who he is and just how much he actually cares, how much he actually has emotions.
yohan, to love his niece so much he decided to manipulate the law, to serve his own agenda and purposes for an outcome that wouldn't actually give them that much peace, but would at least position the country in a way they could grow and give elijah a life where she wouldn't have to grow up into that kind of destruction. this is why yohan "leaves" gaon behind and why gaon is the hope of the show because in going along with his plans, yohan realized that if gaon wasn't going to follow him through til the end, if he was going to do everything in his power to stop yohan, then the biggest apology yohan could give gaon was the world - the entire judicial system to make things right, to do better. that was yohan's gift to gaon and his apology because yohan had no intention of making it better. but maybe gaon could with him gone.
i've seen a few comments about how if yohan was someone in irl, we'd all steer clear of him, well, there's a lot of characters out there like that, but i wouldn't stay away from him for the reasons everyone typically lists (like the choking and manipulation) because they think he's that way just bc. yohan's actions mimic those of someone who simply doesn't care because they're depressed and not because they're psychotic. there is a DIFFERENCE. like yes, are some of his actions shitty? and his gaon right to mistrust the things he does sometimes, also yes.
but understand that there is a difference in people's behaviors depending on the underlying mental health issues involved. i don't fully believe yohan had any intent to hurt elijah or gaon maliciously. it's part of yohan being oblivious and not recognizing his own actions mixed with the entirety of his plans to be followed through til the very end. we've seen how oblivious yohan can be (the classroom bird story is a classic example; they all thought he was the devil when in reality, this kid only hurt the bird because it was scaring the girl he sat next to. logically, that mean eliminating the threat. he didn't purposefully kill the bird and enjoy it. it was a practical response within his own personal world).
i feel like i'm missing parts of this discussion, which is why i said this was a difficult topic for me to approach just to get all of my thoughts about it out there. and long story short to answer your question: i think yohan intended to die (just like he had a plan in case went to jail, for example). that possibility couldn't have been ruled out. but i think he had the plan to escape with elijah so that she could get better. either way, whatever happened happened, even if he died. elijah would be taken care of regardless.
gaon throws a wrench in his plans just a little bit, makes him realize his emotional capacities but gaon's not enough to stop yohan from seeing his plans out until the very end, even if that means losing gaon, too, because even if gaon has shown yohan that he is worthy of love and family and affection, it is not enough to forgive everything he's done, and he needs to make right what was wrong. yohan's death in that courtroom, if it had happened, wouldn't be the thing everyone needed to forgive him for his actions but it would be a start in eliminating himself as part of the problem.
another thing to keep in mind, is that we know yohan is not a sociopath, even if that's what everyone wanted us to believe. everyone thought he made sunah jump out the window, but what he was actually doing was protecting isaac and his mother's necklace. sunah made the choice all on her own, set up yohan and framed him despite yohan reaching out time and time again. isaac didn't even understand what had happened and focused on the fact that this girl jumped because of yohan without listening to the truth of it. yohan has always been shown to be fiercely loyal to the people he loves. he's never directly done anything bad (at least as a kid) unless he was provoked.
what people need to understand about yohan as a character is INTENTIONS. and i hope i'm making myself clear on this. everyone thinks he's born a devil, but that has never been the case. yohan's actions just come from a place from blind revenge. if he never needed to get revenge in the first place, if isaac was alive and well, would yohan make these same decisions? would he still be this kind of person who needed to use these methods to work around the law? i don't think so.
i think i remember getting an ask awhile back about whether yohan would eventually turn into who he is now had isaac lived because we see him livid and upset during that flashback to one of his earlier court cases (where we find he's ripping the paper with the pen) and whether or not isaac's death just fast forwarded the process. i don't feel like trying to go dig that post out, and i can't remember what i said on it either, but i feel yohan would have his family as a moral compass to keep him in line, and he wouldn't have succumbed to his present-day tactics. i think he could've worked his way up into the system and made real change. i think his heart could've been there all long, but again, was derailed by isaac's death and of course, plans changed.
this was a mouthful, and i hope what i'm saying makes sense because you can probably see what i mean about how difficult it is trying to organize my thoughts about this subject. but i am under the full belief that yohan had every intention of dying at the end or even before that. i think he's a depressed individual who learned to slowly open back up with gaon's help, but gaon is no doctor and no amount of his kindness would help someone that depressed either. it helped, certainly. but yohan saw himself as a monster/devil until the very end, and was more than willing to kill himself to make gaon and elijah's life so much easier. as penance. as justice. as love.
#x#the devil judge#the devil judge meta#this is a long one fjlaskdf oops#but YALL this is my last ask!!!!!!!!!! im finally caught up!!!!!!#holy shit thank you to anyone who has sent me asks the past 3 months while this show was airing too#i know ive been slow to answer but!! I DID IT!!!!!!!!#of course feel free to send more if you want but i feel so happy to have gotten to everyone#AND if you sent me an and you haven't seen it#it possibly didn't go through and i am so so so sorry#i haven't ignored anyone who has sent me anything so please send again if you want
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You are literally so valid for your feelings about that whole thing with the stancy breakup!! Especially since it is canon that she does lead Steve on for almost a year. Nancy says to Jonathan that she was waiting for him to take the move in that month cuz she wanted signs or whatever. I really don’t remember that convo but I do remember that she said she was waiting for a month after. And Jonathan needed to help Will. And Nancy just lost Barb so it’s very concerning and off putting that she put it that way. Cuz both of them were grieving and trying to fix everything in their lives so it could go back to being normal. Also yes Steve feeling like a shitty boyfriend and then her not saying anything to reassure him after that is so annoying. And does show that their problems were there from the beginning. It’s so weird to me that she says nothing after that statement while also most likely knowing that Steve was trying to be a boyfriend. But because he couldn’t be the boyfriend she wanted he wasn’t good enough. And that gets me even more cuz Steve wanted to be a better person and worked on himself: and still somehow it wasn’t enough for the person that he deeply loved. Which is also why I hate them bringing up stancy in season 4 and for Steve thanking Nancy about that bump on the head. Cuz he doesn’t believe that he would’ve changed by himself (even tho he did and I hate that people can’t see that) but instead needed someone to make him feel like shit in order to become better. I may be twisting this a bit and idk if this is the right wording so hopefully you get my drift. Literally that thank you from Steve made me feel so annoyed cuz that was all Steve’s doing about being a better person. He saw the way he was acting and didn’t like himself so he became better. And then the bathroom scene where he’s like ‘like we’re in love’ gets me everytime. Cuz he can’t believe this and he doesn’t want to. Since then it means that another person was pretending to care about him when they really didn’t. You are gonna get so pissed at this since I was too: but I saw in a fic that someone was using Jonathan to bash Steve about him being concerned over that instead of Nancy saying that they killed Barb and caring for Nancy’s every need. I shut the fic that instant and saw red and was about ready to cry cuz ummm that’s so fucked up. Steve just got told that he wasn’t loved by his fucking girlfriend and he should feel ashamed for feeling that. Anyway sorry that this got long but their relationship and the way the duffers handled it is very annoying. Hope you have a good day/night :) and hope I didn’t ruin it with that last part
the way the duffers literally ruined what both steve and nancy could’ve been (separately) with the way they have handled their relationship is literallllyyy so maddening to me i can’t handle it. there are so many things they could’ve done differently especially with season 4!!!! at this point i am reallly hoping steve wanting her back has something ANYTHING to do with the UD being stuck in 1983 and nothing to do with it being foreshadowing for a stupid ass sacrifice or something along those lines bc steve deserves the world and nancy would never give it to him
also that fic sounds like bullshit because he should also be allowed to mourn whatever the hell she did to him and process things on his own (although i don’t agree with him leaving her! but if him telling johnny to take her home is true then that is better)
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